My SIL Exposed My Mom to Covid

[brockash]

That shouldn't even matter, your SIL should have put herself in to quarantine. That is just common sense.
Your mother should have sent her away and not let her in.
Hopefully symptoms will be on the more mild side and everyone ends up recovering quickly and completely.

I think a lot of ppl envy a world in which if your job tells you to come in you can just say nope I'm choosing to quarantine myself even though your policy says it's not needed. Definitely a luxury that many don't have.

 

[ronandannette]

I am so ridiculously angry right now. My brother is in the hospital right now with Covid. My SIL called her workplace and told them that he was in the hospital with Covid and that she hadn't got her tests results back. She claims they told her to come into work anyway. She works overnights at a big box store. She dropped their dog off to spend the night at my mom's. She comes to pick him up in the morning and comes in the house and visits. She gets home and gets a call saying she is positive for Covid.

I just can't believe the absolute stupidity and lack of concern for others. It's my mom's birthday today and now I won't be able to visit and I won't be able to see her for two weeks. I know I should have just kept my mouth shut, but I asked my mom why she didn't tell her she had to leave. She said she couldn't do that. I said, yes you can! My mom was already upset and I know what I said didn't help, but seriously!

I'm trying to get my head around all this. May I ask, where you are is it totally up to each individual to do whatever they choose in these situations? I'm not talking about people who flout regulations; those people are everywhere unfortunately. What I'm asking is whether or not this situation is subject to any local/state/federal rules?

Here, if a person is diagnosed with Covid their close contacts must be reported to the provincial health authority. Those people must report for mandatory testing. Then, even with a negative test result, they are in full quarantine for 14 days from the date of their exposure to a positive case. During this time it is illegal (and subject to fines starting at $1,000) for them to leave their homes for any reason and there would be hell to pay for any business that knowingly allowed such a person onto their premises to work. Again, of course there are those who lie and dodge the restrictions but at least the framework is in place and applies to every single citizen - no guess work about what is OK or not OK to do.

 

[luvsvacation]

I'm trying to get my head around all this. May I ask, where you are is it totally up to each individual to do whatever they choose in these situations? I'm not talking about people who flout regulations; those people are everywhere unfortunately. What I'm asking is whether or not this situation is subject to any local/state/federal rules?

Here, if a person is diagnosed with Covid their close contacts must be reported to the provincial health authority. Those people must report for mandatory testing. Then, even with a negative test result, they are in full quarantine for 14 days from the date of their exposure to a positive case. During this time it is illegal (and subject to fines starting at $1,000) for them to leave their homes for any reason and there would be hell to pay for any business that knowingly allowed such a person onto their premises to work. Again, of course there are those who lie and dodge the restrictions but at least the framework is in place and applies to every single citizen - no guess work about what is OK or not OK to do.

That’s not how quarantines work here (Midwest). Here if someone test positive that person then let’s anyone who has been around them know. Originally the health dept was doing the contacting but as there are so many cases now it’s left to the positive person to let their contacts know. Anyone considered a close contact to the positive person must quarantine for 14 days. Of course this is all done on the honor system. I am a nanny. Last week the family I work for all tested positive. They let me know and now I’m quarantined for 14 days. My husband/kids can still go to work/school. I am not going to get tested. If I did and I came back positive then my husband/kids would now be contacts of me and they would be required to stay home. Again no one is actually checking up on this but still I’m not going to get tested.

 

[DLgal]

I work at a school and we're starting to lean the same way. We also don't, nor have we ever quarantined siblings of a student who is positive or quarentining themselves...the policies are pretty odd.

Wow, really? That seems really stupid. In our district, if any family member has been exposed and/or is awaiting a test result, students have to stay home until the result is obtained. My kids will have to miss Monday and possibly Tuesday next week because my husband is in quarantine after an exposure at work Monday. He will get tested tomorrow, but we don't expect results before Monday morning.

 

[Starport Seven-Five]

I am not going to get tested. If I did and I came back positive then my husband/kids would now be contacts of me and they would be required to stay home.

So it's better for them to be out in the community possibly spreading it?

 

[brockash]

I'm trying to get my head around all this. May I ask, where you are is it totally up to each individual to do whatever they choose in these situations? I'm not talking about people who flout regulations; those people are everywhere unfortunately. What I'm asking is whether or not this situation is subject to any local/state/federal rules?

Here, if a person is diagnosed with Covid their close contacts must be reported to the provincial health authority. Those people must report for mandatory testing. Then, even with a negative test result, they are in full quarantine for 14 days from the date of their exposure to a positive case. During this time it is illegal (and subject to fines starting at $1,000) for them to leave their homes for any reason and there would be hell to pay for any business that knowingly allowed such a person onto their premises to work. Again, of course there are those who lie and dodge the restrictions but at least the framework is in place and applies to every single citizen - no guess work about what is OK or not OK to do.

We're in TN and the health department has stopped contract tracing...there system is too overwhelmed. May I ask where you live...it seems wherever you are is actually following through with contact tracing...honestly I just haven't heard of many places that actually do.

 

[luvsvacation]

Wow, really? That seems really stupid. In our district, if any family member has been exposed and/or is awaiting a test result, students have to stay home until the result is obtained. My kids will have to miss Monday and possibly Tuesday next week because my husband is in quarantine after an exposure at work Monday. He will get tested tomorrow, but we don't expect results before Monday morning.

Our governor (Missouri) actually just changed the definition for when quarantines are necessary because so many healthy kids were being kept out of school. Now if a child test positive the other kids that were sitting near them no longer have to quarantine. Before for each sick kid there were about 6 other kids per class that were being quarantined. In high school with 7 classes that really added up. Now the contact kids aren’t required to quarantine. Never have family members been required to quarantine when someone is exposed. Only the contact person was required to quarantine.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

We're in TN and the health department has stopped contract tracing...there system is too overwhelmed. May I ask where you live...it seems wherever you are is actually following through with contact tracing...honestly I just haven't heard of many places that actually do.

She lives in Canada. It appears everyone in their government is actually trying to save lives.

 

[disneychrista]

But what if you were exposed and visited your mom? You never know when you have been exposed to Covid. Maybe best to wait to see your mom until there is a vaccine.

I haven’t seen my mom since Christmas last year. She was sick in January and into February and now with Covid, there is just no way. It sucks. It’s not the way we want it to be but it just isn’t worth the risk.

 

[disneychrista]

Here, if a person is diagnosed with Covid their close contacts must be reported to the provincial health authority. Those people must report for mandatory testing. Then, even with a negative test result, they are in full quarantine for 14 days from the date of their exposure to a positive case.

As it should be for everyone, everywhere.

 

[Christine]

CARES act pays employers 14 days for employees ordered to quarantine or isolate. Is your husband's employer not taking advantage of this benefit?

I believe the money is all gone now.

 

[Hikergirl]

I think a lot of ppl envy a world in which if your job tells you to come in you can just say nope I'm choosing to quarantine myself even though your policy says it's not needed. Definitely a luxury that many don't have.

I agree, but that doesn't change the fact that the SIL was exposed to a COVID positive person, and that means you should quarantine instead of visiting your MIL. You don't need a doctor or anyone else telling you what you should do, if you have an ounce of common sense and decency you know what you should do in that case.

 

[Heigh-Ho]

Why would it be the same. The poster didn't know she was in close contact with anybody & I am assuming if she did she would do as most do and stay quarantined for some time or get a test and as a sane person would do wait till they get results before mingling. If not why take the test.
Really IMO anybody who knows they were in close contact with someone with Covid and then gets close to anybody elderly intentionally should really get some counseling. I am assuming posters mother is somewhat elderly, but really anyone over 55 should be avoided. Really anybody & eveybody should be avoided.

I think you read my comment wrong or I didn't word it the best.

I wasn't saying the author of the thread would go out and about waiting for a test result like her sister in law did. I was saying what if the author of the thread had covid herself (which you do not know all the time) what if she was actually the one to give it to her mother and not the sister-in-law. I was really responding to your "You can't blame someone for catching unless you knew how thye caught." and the feeling the author of the thread gave off. People are quick to blame but may not realize they themselves could be the culprit (and they aren't meaning to). The author of the thread mentioned they were going to go over (before this happened) to see her mom for her birthday. That's risky too.

 

[tcufrog]

I avoid visiting ANYONE if I am sick with ANYTHING contagious. I isolate at home in my bedroom. Perhaps some should realize even the flu can potentially be deadly for the elderly or ANYONE with pre existing conditions. It boggles my mind to think ANYONE with a confirmed case of COVID or close contact...would risk infecting ANYONE.

OP hoping for the best outcome for your family.

My mom was in the hospital on oxygen because of the flu when the COVID lockdown hit.

 

[wenrob]

That’s not how quarantines work here (Midwest). Here if someone test positive that person then let’s anyone who has been around them know. Originally the health dept was doing the contacting but as there are so many cases now it’s left to the positive person to let their contacts know. Anyone considered a close contact to the positive person must quarantine for 14 days. Of course this is all done on the honor system. I am a nanny. Last week the family I work for all tested positive. They let me know and now I’m quarantined for 14 days. My husband/kids can still go to work/school. I am not going to get tested. If I did and I came back positive then my husband/kids would now be contacts of me and they would be required to stay home. Again no one is actually checking up on this but still I’m not going to get tested.

This is…just… why would you do that?

 

[DLgal]

This is…just… why would you do that?

Because this person cares more about inconveniencing their family than exposing others to Covid. It's a disgusting attitude.

 

[mjkacmom]

Because this person cares more about inconveniencing their family than exposing others to Covid. It's a disgusting attitude.

My high school senior sadly missed her last two soccer games (of her life) because she was exposed and didn’t want to risk her teammates, got tested as soon as allowed. No work for her or ds17.

 

[TLSnell1981]

That’s not how quarantines work here (Midwest). Here if someone test positive that person then let’s anyone who has been around them know. Originally the health dept was doing the contacting but as there are so many cases now it’s left to the positive person to let their contacts know. Anyone considered a close contact to the positive person must quarantine for 14 days. Of course this is all done on the honor system. I am a nanny. Last week the family I work for all tested positive. They let me know and now I’m quarantined for 14 days. My husband/kids can still go to work/school. I am not going to get tested. If I did and I came back positive then my husband/kids would now be contacts of me and they would be required to stay home. Again no one is actually checking up on this but still I’m not going to get tested.

Did you know they were exposed to the virus or after they tested positive?

 

[wenrob]

Because this person cares more about inconveniencing their family than exposing others to Covid. It's a disgusting attitude.

I distinctly remember the days when HIV was pretty much a death sentence. (I lost two very good friends and a cousin) It was paramount that if you thought you were exposed or tested positive you notified former and current partners and that they notified theirs. Even though it’s very manageable now, it’s still the right thing to do. I look at this the same way.

eta: And this is why when I get the surveys about sending my kids back to school I check “no.”

 

[mi*vida*loca]

Most are selfish when it comes to covid. It’s all about me me me.

You have the crowd that will go to work sick and not care who they expose because they cant afford two weeks without pay.

Then you have the crowd that wants you to stay home when you’re sick because they don’t want to be exposed and they don’t give two craps how you’ll manage without pay for two or more weeks. Or worse...some jobs are firing people over calling out sick.