To some extent, it will depend on luck of the draw. I can't speak to the steakhouse, as it is one of the few places at WDW I've never visited. Ale and Compass is usually not too loud.
A kinda neat, and quiet option if you are arriving via MCO is McCoy's Grill, right IN the airport. It is part of the Hyatt. To get there, you take the glass elevators in the main lobby of the airport up a floor. It is tucked back, with dividers, so I don't recall hearing noise form down below. While they offer less expensive menu options like pizza and sandwiches, the more expensive entrees and sushi are very good, and it has an upscale look. They also have a great crawfish chowder, and are open late if your flight is delayed. No reservations needed. not empty, but pretty quiet whenever we've dined there.
Even more upscale is Hemisphere. People usually dress up there. I've only been to McCoy's, but it looks really nice. They take reservations, but you might not need them.
I like the Trattoria, but it is not quiet.
You could also try the options at the Swan/Dolphin/Swan Reserve. Of them, Amare at the Swan Reserve gets very high reviews. When we've stayed there, we've only done QS and room service, but the room service food was excellent! (and the QS) We've also liked the casual eateries at the Swan Dolphin. Kimonos is good, but it is only quiet before the karaoke starts. Overall, food quality is better than comparable WDW. If you have AAA, you can get a discount at some of them too! (I think 20%)