Teen test anxiety/panic?

[Ursula J]

My very bright 16 year old has started getting worse and worse test anxiety-- she's making herself (and us) miserable and probably doing worse than she should. Any of you have experience with this? Does anything help? I'm not opposed to medication if it helps. The SAT is looming, which makes it worse.

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

Don't be afraid of medication. If your kid needs a metaphorical umbrella over their heads, there are answers out there. There are older but still effective medications known as Benzodiazepines that act as tranquillisers either over a prolonged period or for a short while... problem is, if taken too much, they can become addictive. I know several more inexperienced doctors who won't prescribe them because of that... but managed appropriately, they are still the gold standard. Second up are Beta Blockers, such as Bisoprolol and Propranolol, which artificially calm the heart and therefore the mood. Safe and effective, unless your teen has heart problems. Third, my favourite, a VERY small dose of a sedating antidepressant such as Dosulepin, a TCA. They act to calm the patient and elevate the mood, a double pronged attack. They helped me the most. And at low doses, any side effects such as over-sedation or nausea should be virtually nil. And don't be afraid of the slightly older antidepressants - some of them are actually more effective. Fourth, a shout out to prescription sedating antihistamines such as Phenergan. These will quell nerves very nicely and have a VERY minimal side effects list AND aren't really addictive even in higher doses.

I wish you every luck.

 

[TipsyTraveler]

Perhaps learning some anxiety coping mechanisms would be a good place to start, then escalate to therapy, if needed.

 

[princesscinderella]

Unfortunately the pressure to do well on the standardized tests and get into an amazing college is just out of control. My teens don’t have test anxiety thank goodness but a lot of their friends do. I think a conversation about expectations and life experience about how the test isn’t a measure of their ability to succeed or how intelligent they are is a great start if you haven’t already had this. Sometimes saying it again and again in different ways helps too as I know my teens choose to hear only half of what is said most of the time before I get tuned out. I also recommend getting them the book “The subtle art of not giving a F***”. It’s a great reminder that we over analyze and put so much pressure on ourselves and how to not let it consume us. Best of luck the teenage years are not easy, I have an 18, 15 & 14 yr old.

 

[Southernmiss]

Get her a doctor appointment.

I'm the mom of 4 high achievers. After high school and the safety and support of living at home, 2 of our sons have anxiety or other mental health diagnosis that really manifested with college and young adult challenges.

I wish we would have been able to realize that they needed some professional help while they lived at home.

You would rather her get help and used to meds or coping techniques now than when she's in college or on her own.

 

[cabanafrau]

Talk therapy along with attempting to try out some simple coping techniques is a great starting point. Try to reach out and get some recommendations on some great therapists in your area because a good fit will bolster the chances of success. Meds may or may not be needed or helpful. Start simple in exploring for solutions and eventually you will find a solution that fits best.

 

[mjkacmom]

Have her see a medical professional, she might be eligible for testing accommodations including extra time.

 

[mumto3girls]

I would get her an appointment with a therapist. A therapist should be able to help her sort through her anxiety and if needed, prescribe some medication. My youngest is a fairly high achiever in school and sports and recently started seeing a therapist who works out of our pediatricians office. I was there for the intake and we discussed meds. The therapist told me she thought DD probably would need something but she wanted to meet a few times first. She indicated she would call if/when she wanted to prescribe. So far no phone call and I think they’ve met 5-6 times. I think sometimes our kids just need someone else to tell them the same things we are telling them about the big picture etc.

 

[HeatherC]

Have her magnesium levels and Vitamin D and B checked. These all can play a role in anxiety and doctors don’t really test for it.

 

[JaxDad]

My 11th grade daughter has the opposite problem. She does great on standardized exams without any preparation whatsoever (perfect 1520 on the PSAT and 1560 on the SAT), but she developed some pretty severe anxiety about just going to school. She fell behind due to a class schedule change and just couldn’t handle it. She was having panic attacks every morning and missed a lot of days (which just compounded the problem).

I recommend therapy. We were lucky to find a great one here. She’s also on low dose antidepressants, although it’s difficult to know their effectiveness yet. (They also seem to give her headaches.) She’s doing much better, but still in therapy for now and still learning various coping strategies. Like @mumto3girls said, having a third party helping the student (and the parents) really works. Her therapist texts and checks up on her daily. I love having the professional support.

I’m going to check her vitamin and mineral levels now too. Thanks @HeatherC!

 

[unrequited23]

There can be a wait to see a therapist covered by insurance in my area, so I would try to get an appointment now, knowing that she might not be seen for several months. In the meantime, encourage her to explore some of the mindfulness apps, meditation/relaxation shows on netflix, or any physical activity she enjoys-yoga, hiking, swimming, kickboxing, etc. In a pinch, I have found Olly's goodbye stress gummies to be helpful, they are sold at Target.

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

I would also recommend therapy. In conjunction with medication, it is the best remedy. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy worked wonders for me and helped me deal with Generalised Anxiety Disorder as well as Social Anxiety Disorder. For my PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) I found greater help in EMDR Therapy. Holistic approaches can also work wonders. Massages. Yoga. Hypnotherapy. Everything has its place.

 

[Lord Manhammer]

Everyone has made some great suggestions here. Therapy can help. Meds can help. Has she talked with her guidance counsellor or a favourite teacher about her anxieties? They may be able to make her feel better.

I'll tell you what I tell my students and maybe it will make her feel better: I bombed the SAT. I bombed the ACT, spectacularly in fact. This left me with intense anxiety as I went to a competitive boys prep school; it was the kind of school where people didn't ask if you were going to college, people asked what Ivy League school you were going to. I was a wreck. The only part of the GRE that I did well on was the written portion because I could organise my thoughts into an essay. I SUCK at testing. I freeze, I get anxiety, I get nervous.

But now years later, I have a BS, an MA and a PhD, the last of which I graduate with a 3.998. You DON'T have to be a good test taker to be successful. Many schools are starting to look less at the standardised tests anyway. My institution doesn't even ask for it. What schools is your daughter considering? Does she even need to take any of these standardised torture devices? Tell her from someone who has walked in her shoes, that it will be ok and she is going to be fine, no matter what scores she gets.

 

[Chili327]

Study more to be more confident in taking the tests? I mean if you know the material, the tests shouldn't be too hard, right? (i'm sure things have changed a lot since I was in school, but if I know my stuff I wouldn't be too concerned)

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I think the timing is significant - 16 and looking at all that’s upcoming. Who wouldn’t have anxiety?

Someone once posted this here on the Dis. I bought it for my kids and I’ve recommended it to lots of others.

Even just skimming and using it as a reference seems helpful - not just for kids, but for parents, as well.



Btw, like a pp, my DD was not a good test taker at all. There were times it cost her.
She just finished her Master’s - with a 4.0!

This, too, shall pass.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

There are older but still effective medications known as Benzodiazepines that act as tranquillisers either over a prolonged period or for a short while... problem is, if taken too much, they can become addictive. I know several more inexperienced doctors who won't prescribe them because of that... but managed appropriately, they are still the gold standard.

I hesitated to respond to this, but I’m going to.

I took care of a patient not too long ago who was a severely addicted, homeless lady. Young, but looked much older. You could see she once was a beautiful woman, but her face and body had severely deteriorated. She was admitted to the hospital for a bloodstream and heart valve infection due to shooting up. It wasn’t her first, and, as an active user, she was not a candidate for surgery to repair the valve damage. (So her life expectancy was short.) Her arms were covered in large bumps making them appear all gnarly. I had occasion to sit with her and talk for a good, long time. Really sweet lady. She told me her addiction started when she was a young girl and prescribed benzodiazepines. I believe her.

The doctors you think are inexperienced may just know more than you give them credit for. After all, they see lots of different patients and cases during four years of medical school. Many have jobs working with patients before that. Then they start seeing hundreds, if not thousands, as they start their careers. Working in hospitals, we see this, unfortunately. Point being that there can be more reasons than inexperience for not prescribing some things. They also have liability and accountability if something happens, so naturally, they have to be careful and discerning.

 

[Neapolitan Ice Cream]

I hesitated to respond to this, but I’m going to.

I took care of a patient not too long ago who was a severely addicted, homeless lady. Young, but looked much older. You could see she once was a beautiful woman, but her face and body had severely deteriorated. She was admitted to the hospital for a bloodstream and heart valve infection due to shooting up. It wasn’t her first, and, as an active user, she was not a candidate for surgery to repair the valve damage. (So her life expectancy was short.) Her arms were covered in large bumps making them appear all gnarly. I had occasion to sit with her and talk for a good, long time. Really sweet lady. She told me her addiction started when she was a young girl and prescribed benzodiazepines. I believe her.

The doctors you think are inexperienced may just know more than you give them credit for. After all, they see lots of different patients and cases during four years of medical school. Many have jobs working with patients before that. Then they start seeing hundreds, if not thousands, as they start their careers. Working in hospitals, we see this, unfortunately. Point being that there can be more reasons than inexperience for not prescribing some things. They also have liability and accountability if something happens, so naturally, they have to be careful and discerning.

Yet sometimes experience DOES count for something. My psychiatrist is VERY old-stool and after a string of failures, he shunted me onto a class of medications called MAOIs. This is rare. In fact, I often have difficulty sourcing them. Only the most experienced doctors will dare try them, as they can prove fatal if not managed just so. Same goes for Typical Antipsychotics. This current generation of psychiatrists will automatically reach for Risperidone, Quetiapine or Aripiprazole. My old skool doctor was around when these were not a Thing. So he was more comfortable prescribing the older, riskier meds. All too often, you deal the cards you are given.

 

[VandVsmama]

My very bright 16 year old has started getting worse and worse test anxiety-- she's making herself (and us) miserable and probably doing worse than she should. Any of you have experience with this? Does anything help? I'm not opposed to medication if it helps. The SAT is looming, which makes it worse.

Many many MANY colleges now are 'test optional' in terms of requiring SAT or ACT when you apply to the school. All of the colleges that my ODD applied to this year (she's a senior in high school) were test optional.

 

[Frwinkley]

As a 3rd grade teacher, this thread makes me so sad. We are putting way too much pressure on kids, and it's starting at a very young age.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Yet sometimes experience DOES count for something. My psychiatrist is VERY old-stool and after a string of failures, he shunted me onto a class of medications called MAOIs. This is rare. In fact, I often have difficulty sourcing them. Only the most experienced doctors will dare try them, as they can prove fatal if not managed just so. Same goes for Typical Antipsychotics. This current generation of psychiatrists will automatically reach for Risperidone, Quetiapine or Aripiprazole. My old skool doctor was around when these were not a Thing. So he was more comfortable prescribing the older, riskier meds. All too often, you deal the cards you are given.

Yes, I know that type of doctor. And I’ve been on board for four decades of drugs in different categories, so I’ve seen a lot of advancements and evolving. From what I see, I like some of the newer medications, if used correctly. Your situation may be different, though. I’m glad you have your pupper.