Journey back to ME!!- I'm getting bugged!!

[goldcupmom]

Happy Thanksgiving All!!

I'm here, life is fine, just busy, & DD is still sleeping in my 'office' where the computer is due to her new paint, furniture & having gutted her room & now trying to find time to reassemble now that the furniture is here. No time to get on the computer it seems.....

Sometime during my near total absence(don't remember when) I had an "opposite" reaction to the fact that my oldest brother had to have triple bypass surgery. That means my mother had arteries from aorta to femoral replaced at 63, my dad died at 73 of a major heart attack, my oldest sister had no pulse below the waist at age 40 & had her arteries replaced then & has had to have them 'cleaned out' twice since (she's now 60, or almost...I think), my 2nd oldest brother had quintuple bypass surgery 3 yrs ago at age 62(and he was always thin & through his 30s at least ran marathons), and now the oldest brother. I feel DOOMED!!! So, instead of it helping me to stay on track, instead, I ate everything in sight....I'm doomed, so what does it matter!

Fortunately, sense has taken over & today is day 3 of being totally back on track. Even when eating well, I've been working on my exercise, so not a total loss. To compound it, all 5 of my siblings are type 2 diabetic. I feel like a freaking time bomb!

Went to the gym this morning, Swam for an hour, did pull ups on the ladder & my stair stuff. Fixed dinner, then after promptly started in with horrid stomach pain. I'm guessing a bad batch of splenda I put in my crustless pumpkin pie, or the raw veggies I ate(but only ate a very few) or perhaps the baked sweet potato. I've been doubled over in pain for almost 4 hours & it is just now subsiding some, but tummy is VERY rumbly & sore/tender now. Oh well, at least I won't overeat today!! And, I wasn't planning on early shopping as I saw nothing I really needed....

Off to update the Exercise challenge & maybe visit some journals. I hope everyone is doing well....I will get back her regularly! I MUST!!

 

[toystoryduo]

Julie,

I hope you are feeling better soon. How's your tummy?

I know that you are concerned about your siblings health and how that impacts your health as well. Please remember Jeremiah 29:11:

"For I know the plans that I have for you," declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

I hope you have a great weekend!

 

[Amy&Dan]

Julie, don't look at yourself as a time bomb. Look at yourself as empowered with knowledge! You know your family history, you know what steps you need to keep taking to reduce your chances of following in their footsteps. Just think, if you didn't know all of this, you would be a timebomb. Instead, you know where you are going and what you need to do. And I think you are doing very well! You have made huge progress with exercise and food. You are going to be the exception to your family's rule!

And lets face it, your eating when you are stressed and upset about issues with weight, is pretty normal. I mean, ALL of us do that. We feel depressed about our weight and we eat. But you got back on track. So give yourself some credit.

I hope your tummy recovered!

 

[goldcupmom]

I'm trying to be positive, Amy, but it is HARD!!!!

Much has happened since I was last on here.....

Saturday night about 9:10 I went downstairs with DS19's GF to get his XBox360 cords & stepped on a nail. DD had had a stringy door curtain & when DH & DS's brought her furniture down, they took it down (she wanted it gone anyway) and threw it at the bottom of the stairs, leaving some of the nails in it. So, this nail, with fabric still attached went ALL the way into the ball of my left foot...about 1.5" in! It was ICKY!! I almost passed out pulling it out & then hobbling upstairs to my room where DD was lying in bed watching TV. Had to go get a Tetanus shot Sunday morning. All seems to be healing nicely & my arm isn't quite as sore today. I actually went swimming this morning.

DS21 is being his usual PITA. DS19 is just gliding thru the end of the semester hoping for decent grades. All looks ok except for World History which is not fun. DD has just 2 wks left before finals & is into the 6 a.m. choir practices now, so she's a bit cranky.

This is 'free ace' month, so DH is going to be at the casino every night. On his way out tonight he dropped the bomb that they announced today no raises which would have come out in March 2009 ( which means a pay cut when you factor in taxes & insurance premiums....ours went up about 110% as it's now based on pay....welcome to the USSA), HUGE layoffs, and his bonus which was due in March as well may be reduced to near nothing by the time they settle on it in mid-January...if he has a job in March anyway. Needless to say I'm not having a great night, but life goes on......

Tonight I finally bit the bullet & cancelled Weight Watchers. $40/month & I have only actually been to a meeting about 4-5 times this year & only made it to weigh in about double that. I really wanted to make lifetime, but have promised myself that if I can get to within 13 lbs of goal by May, I will join until I make it (you have to have at least 10 to lose to join).

I tried to reduce our gym membership to me only, but it's in DH name so I can't. I need to rethink what to do about that. DH needs it, but won't go. DD wants to, but has no time. I let DSil take over DS19s slot, but she has been only 2x this year. Unfortunately, with the price increases, our $90/mo family membership is only about $35 more than a single would be........

So, now I REALLY need to be more accountable to y'all & get my rear in gear & lose this weight. I had a few really good days, then lost control again....1 step forward 2 steps back(at least!)

Time to go brush the pups after their much needed bath. More later.....

 

[Amy&Dan]

Julie,

I am so sorry about your dh's job. I tell ya Wish Sis, our lives do parallel. Dh's job is the same, hasn't had a raise in over 4 years now, insurance has risen big time. Bonus he is supposed to get probably isn't happening this year (he got 50% last year, I would welcome that this year). Its scary. Is you husband thinking of looking for something else or just going to wait and see? I will keep you guys in my prayers. These are scary times.

I also cancelled my WW membership. I plan to buy some coupons instead. I have never had them ask for more than one coupon, even if I have missed weeks on end. I just get sick of spending money and not going or not losing. Sound familiar? But I still believe in WW and still hope to get to goal with them and even become a leader someday.

I am so sorry about your foot, OUCH! I hope its healed up.

Just hang in there, this time of year between Chirstmas shopping, family stress and knowing the end of the year is upon us, just brings about a lot of worrying. But 2009 is almost here and a new start is ours!

 

[toystoryduo]

Happy New Year, Julie!

We miss you around here! I hope that all is well.

May you and your family have a healthy and happy new year!

 

[goldcupmom]

Wow! I can hardly believe it has been almost a month since I have posted. Life has been busy, to say the least!

I weighed in for BL7 today & am up.... but I'm not surprised. I have not tracked anything over the holidays & have been consuming WAY TOO MUCH sweets in my boredom/loneliness. Without my pups, I think I'd be going CRAZY!

First to my new addition to my journal title.... DH bought me a BodyBugg for Christmas....though I don't have it yet. I have started this year HEAVIER than I started last year and I'm not happy about it, but my food has been totally out of control most of the 2nd half of the year. Should the stars align properly, it should arrive middle of next week.

2010 I will turn FIFTY!! I have to lose this weight once and for all! I ended up NOT cancelling Weight Watchers. I decided if he could go & spend 96.5 HOURS last month at the casino (granted he ended the month $19 ahead), I can stick with WW at least until we know something about the job. Why borrow worries? For now things are OK.

Although you couldn't tell it by this moment (I'm eating baked tostitos & spinach artichoke dip), my goal is to enter my 50th year in the 150s and make my goal by next Christmas. Exercise is not my problem....FOOD is the enemy!

I haven't gotten a lot of exercise in since the 18th as DH has been off, kids all home, etc. 30th I did get in 10 miles. DD & her BF agreed to walk with me in the bosque from the N end to the aquarium (8.27 mi). We then walked the aquarium for an hour, took the little train across to the zoo, had lunch & walked there for about an hour. When I asked DH to drop us off to start our walk he kept telling me how stupid it was. Then when he met us at the zoo, on the way home he again how I 'wasted' the day. Personally, the 2 hours 2 min I spent walking to the aquarium was wonderful, as was the next 2 hours spent with DD & her BF. this & similar is why it's hard for me to be motivated to exercise when everyone is home. Next week I should be able to get back into my routine.

DD turned 17 on 12/17. Hard to believe! She, the BF, DH & I went to a buffet/game place. Her Bday was really hard for me as I had bought her the hope chest to match her furniture. When we brought it up she got this POd look on her face & asked what it was. She ended the night crying about how low I have stooped to buy her FURNITURE for her birthday. Needless to say I was also very upset, but it is better now.

Somewhere in Dec. DS22 was promoted to In Stock Supervisor....basically over the night stocking crew & inventory. For the first time in YEARS, he actually agreed to go out & eat with us to celebrate (a burger & beer place, but ...). He also wanted his hair trimmed and agreed to go to the lady who does mine(who we know from gymnastics). She cut some of his huge goatee (think zztop), showed him how to trim his sideburns & shaped the hair he is trying to grow long, telling him that wolf man is NOT a fashion! But, he is still overdrawing his account, still not paying me, etc, but baby steps.......I'm still praying.

DS19 finished another semester and again changed his major. This time, I think it suits him.....psychology & counseling. He really wants to be a youth pastor & has a heart for teens. With a bit of luck, he should be able to graduate EARLY, a year from spring. He then wants to work while working on his masters. In the meantime he is having MAJOR girl miseries. The latest one to dump him has the maturity of about a 12 year old & he falls hard! Poor baby! He is way too nice!

Will end this & post another hoping that this doesn't crash......

 

[goldcupmom]

Just before Christmas a niece from Iowa came to ABQ to visit her Boyfriend's family. We met for dinner. I haven't seen her in almost 5 years!

January 16 the older of my DNieces & her hubby from FL are coming. Sadly, they're leaving the babies at home. They are then headed north for a couple of nights to go snowmobiling & have some down time from a 2 yo & a 7 month old.

I have no trips in the planning & that itself makes me sad. There is a slight hope that I can go to FL in March. DH work sponsors a week for presidential classroom for employees teens who meet certain criteria & she qualified. We didn't find out until this week that when they say all expenses paid, they mean EXCEPT for getting to DC. She just has to decide for sure she wants to do it as it is a week of suits & "nerd-dom" in her words, though it really is how she is. I found decent priced flights & figure that if I fly her to DC, I should tag along then go to FL before meeting her to fly home. Time will tell.....

The nieces are at Fort Wilderness in their campers right now. The younger of the two has RATS in the walls of their camper & they decided to go anyway! I wouldn't have been able to stand it! Their neighbor is an exterminator & said he was pretty confident they had eaten the poison & shouldn't live more than a couple of days......ICK!!!! Not me!! Not even for Disney!!

I hope all is well with everyone! Thanks for keeping me on page one! I PROMISE I will get caught up with journals next week. I MUST stay connected on here to succeed! You all are my lifeline!!

 

[Amy&Dan]

Julie, Happy New Year!

I didn't quit WW either, like you I decided to give it another try. Lets do this together!

Sounds like all three kids are doing well. I am really happy for you that ds22 is taking those baby steps. Really positive sign!

And I think your other son would make a perfect youth pastor. I hope he finds a special someone to appreciate him!

In time, dd will love that hope chest. Teenage girls are not the easiest creatures to buy for!


Keep up your good work. I know you can make your goal, we are all here for each other so lets all make our goals together.

Plan a trip, its good for you! And that story of the rats in the camper made me shiver (and laugh!). I love Disney, but not that much!

 

[goldcupmom]

Well, today was good up until the time that DH & his DSis left for their daily casino visit. Then I seem to get lonely, frustrated, angry, etc and EAT! I have to find something for ME to keep me from doing that. GRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!

Went for a walk this morning....4.6 miles. Slower than usual because DH actually came with me. Good for him as it's the first time in over a month he's moved.

Someone came to look at DS19s bug tonight. He is very frustrated that it is not selling. Poor kid needs the money & it is an incredible car...even if it is 43 yrs old! Praying he gets it sold soon! Book value is $5800 - $12200 depending on condition & this is really exceptional w/ a new engine & he's asking $6000. Hopefully the right person will come along soon.

Off to visit a couple more journals, then snuggle the pups. Someday, if I figure out how to post pics, I will....

 

[lovinaz]

Julie, I bet you are excited to get the bodybug! I can't wait to hear how you like it, I have been curious about it myself.

It can be hard when you are on a different page from the rest of your family, but I think you are doing great considering your situation. Keep it up!

 

[Amy&Dan]

Julie, good job on that walk, that's a long one! I am sorry you get that lonely feeling when you dh and his sister go to the casino. I wish I had a nugget of wisdom to help you thorugh that. Maybe go see a movie? Offer to take one of your kids with you and if they don't want to go, go alone. Have you ever thought about joining a women's book club? They are great ways to meet other women and quite fun. I am looking to join a new one, I did that years ago and really loved it. Or maybe a Bunko group? You need some women friends. Lots of women our age are divorced, verging or already at empty nest stage or have husbands who have different interests. Gal friends are a good thing! I wish I lived close by, I'd love to get together with you since my husband works all the time! Hang in there. 2009 is OUR year. And yes we will STOP this emotional eating thing together. We are stong women, we can do it!

 

[toystoryduo]

Hi Julie,

I'm glad you're back, WISH sis! We missed you!

It sounds like you have had a lot going on. Don't forget to make some time for you.

I'm going to take another look at the WW stuff that you sent me. I really want to lose some weight this year!

I hope you have a great evening!

 

[goldcupmom]

It's Monday! DH is back at work, DD is back at school, DS19 is still sleeping and DS22 will be in any minute from work. Normalcy is almost upon me!

Unfortunately, I have a list of 15 'to do' items today. But most of them I can actually get done....I think!

I lost my gym pass...or rather DD borrowed my car keys to use my car to take the boyfriend (bf) home & my pass somehow disappeared...TWO weeks ago! And, they can't issue a new one early in the morning when I usually go as they can't accept the $5 it takes to get one. UGH!! So, I'm going in to get the pass today, then swim tomorrow.

I'm really thinking of dropping the gym, or at least the family part, as I'm the only one using it & it is $90/mo .

Off to start my list! Hope everyone has a good day!

 

[traceycooper]

Happy New Year Julie

maybe just have a gym membership for you & treat yourself with the spare cash
looks like most of us are starting the year with a uphill struggle - at least we all have each other

 

[Amy&Dan]

Hi Julie, my life is back to normal today as well! I think just having you on the gym membership sounds good. After all, why pay for everyone else not to use it? Have a great day!

 

[toystoryduo]

Hi Julie,

Can you change your family gym membership to a single membership since you're the only one who uses the gym? Maybe you can save some money that way. I like Tracey's idea of you treating yourself with the spare cash.

I hope you have a great day tomorrow!

 

[goldcupmom]

Finally made it to the gym this morning & swam 75 min. then did my 10 min ab work - 200 crunches.

VERY cold & windy here today!

Tracey & Tracy - I like the gym idea! I'm giving them til the end of January, then getting it changed to just me.

Y'all have inspired me to start a new journal.....soon as the BUGG comes, probably.

Yesterday was OK. I didn't eat dinner til really late, then I went over points with a handful of fancy nuts. Oh well....... Still better than I have been.

Off to find Dniece a rental car for the 16th.

Have a great day all!!

 

[Amy&Dan]

Hey Julie, it was windy here last night, I could feel the whole house shaking. Guess that wind marched down I-25 to your neck of the woods!

So what is the bugg? I need to research this, you have me wondering!

Hope today is a good one. At least those fancy nuts have protein so they aren't empty calories. I think you are off to a very solid start!

 

[toystoryduo]

Great job getting to the gym, Julie! Keep up the good work!

It's cold and somewhat windy here today too. When does Spring begin?

Have a great evening and a wonderful day tomorrow!