Holiday gift ideas for people in a facility?

[LuvOrlando]

MIL is in a Memory Care facility in another state where space is limited so the stuff we used to gift doesn't really work anymore, it has been a challenge.

Recently, I settled on sending her some Wegman's meals she likes from Instacart for the weekend and some of her favorite candy from back when, the staff says she eats everything.

Anyone have standby gifts, this can be tough to manage.

 

[cabanafrau]

Does she benefit from things like fidgets or stress balls? Sometimes those are useful for patients with dementia, or elderly in general to keep dexterity sharp.

Is she in need of a bib when eating? There are some cute ones on etsy.

Would she enjoy a soft sweater or a fluffy robe? Maybe what she has could use a refresh?

The meals idea is likely a good one. They often don't have a lot of space for things, which can accumulate quickly. Gift giving really minimizes at a certain point, I know it feels odd. It's tough to accept, but tell it to yourself realistically and rationally like you'd tell a friend and you'll find some peace with the shift.

 

[NYCgrrl]

Scented lotion is always needed and used. Especially nice if it’s a scent from a parfume line she used in the past.

When I was in rehab I was amazed at the items some had in their rooms. When it was time to move many many many empty boxes were needed to transfer their goods to another ward.

 

[Bad Pink Tink 2.0]

My gran was in a care facility and she had a type of dementia.

Some things we did
1. Someone did a build a bear type thing which had a function to record and then play back a short audio. My grans one had one of her favourite songs.
2. We had a family visitor book in her room, as gran didnt remember visitors. We would write the date we visited and any small message or note that the next visitor should know about.
3. We had to provide cosmetics and personal toiletries, hair brush, etc so things like that were always welcome gifts.
4. We had a photo hanging line near her bed, which we would switch out and update photos of various family members. On the back of each photo was the name of the person and how they were related to gran.

 

[Jeannie]

My mother was in a memory care facility for just over 2 years. Each Christmas I would get her a photo wall calendar from Walgreens. Each month would have pictures of her great granddaughters so she could see them throughout the year. Originally I would put in all the family birthdays and anniversaries, but left them out when she didn't really know anyone anymore. I would also put toiletries in a big gift basket. I'd include necessities like shampoo, toothpaste, deodorant, etc. and also some extras such as nail polish, body wash pouf, cookies, snacks.

 

[jo-jo]

My gran was in a care facility and she had a type of dementia.

Some things we did
1. Someone did a build a bear type thing which had a function to record and then play back a short audio. My grans one had one of her favourite songs.
2. We had a family visitor book in her room, as gran didnt remember visitors. We would write the date we visited and any small message or note that the next visitor should know about.
3. We had to provide cosmetics and personal toiletries, hair brush, etc so things like that were always welcome gifts.
4. We had a photo hanging line near her bed, which we would switch out and update photos of various family members. On the back of each photo was the name of the person and how they were related to gran.

I love that idea about musical bear. We visited someone from our church, she didn’t know who I was but remembered all the old hymns. We would sit and sing.

I did a quick look on Amazon, they have units that can record anywhere from 1 min up to 16 mins.

 

[Bad Pink Tink 2.0]

I love that idea about musical bear. We visited someone from our church, she didn’t know who I was but remembered all the old hymns. We would sit and sing.

Thats what my gran was like sometimes. When people are like that the thing to do is be present in their world, not to force them into our world. My gran if she was feeling well would talk so clearly about things, places and people from 50 years ago but then would tell you she didnt get any lunch, when we could see the finished lunch tray on the side table.

As she like the bear so much, my mum would play other music and songs that were from my grans time and she would sing along.

 

[kathyk2]

Can you pay to have her hair cut or a manicure? If she has to pay for her health and beauty products buy some that you know she uses.

 

[barkley]

I love that idea about musical bear. We visited someone from our church, she didn’t know who I was but remembered all the old hymns. We would sit and sing.

people with memory and brain injury issues can frequently remember music much easier than even the most simple day to day things. likewise, people who suffer from aphasia may not be able to speak words that make sense but can through singing (i experienced this with my strokes). it can bring a tremendous comfort when you are dealing with a memory issue to have something that you CAN remember so for that reason i think the build a bear idea or anything that incorporates music would be ideal. something as simple as a small music box that plays a familiar tune could bring tremendous joy.

 

[mumto3girls]

Can you pay to have her hair cut or a manicure? If she has to pay for her health and beauty products buy some that you know she uses.

DH’s grandma was in a facility with a “beauty parlor” on site. We got her gift cards to get her hair done. I think she could have also done manicures/pedicures. She seemed to enjoy it and it cut down on the extra stuff in her space. She did not have memory issues though. My mom was in a different facility that was memory care only and they also had a someone who came in a few days a week, but my mom refused to go. Sometimes people with dementia aren’t interested in things they used to like.

 

[Bad Pink Tink 2.0]

DH’s grandma was in a facility with a “beauty parlor” on site. We got her gift cards to get her hair done. I think she could have also done manicures/pedicures. She seemed to enjoy it and it cut down on the extra stuff in her space. She did not have memory issues though. My mom was in a different facility that was memory care only and they also had a someone who came in a few days a week, but my mom refused to go. Sometimes people with dementia aren’t interested in things they used to like.

Agree. My gran used to get her hair done by the same lady for years and years when she lived in her own house. When she moved to the care facility, we paid for this lady to travel to gran to do her hair, as with the memory issues, she was comfortable with the hairdresser she knew but didnt want a new person doing her hair.

 

[QueenIsabella]

I think the beauty parlor idea is great, or personal care products. When my great-aunt (passed at 94) was in a home, we brightened her whole day with a bottle of nail polish and a manicure. It made her feel pretty! Similarly, I had an uncle whose one request was...a tube of Fixodent. Favorite food items are a good choice, too.

I like the idea of music, too--possibly a CD player with headphones (a person in memory care might not be able to manage an iPod, they're a more recent invention).

 

[kuhltiffany]

They really don’t need more “stuff”. Things to brighten the room like balloons or flowers are good, window clings or even just a card (they make neat 3D pop up ones that are great to display).

 

[LuvOrlando]

The hair stuff is a great idea but in our case what we thought was her neglecting hair turns out to be a choice, she said so last time we saw her when she got a trim but refused a cut. When she was a teen MIL had very long thick hair, when she became a RN and a mom she cut it all so I never knew her with long hair again. Seems to me she wants to look in the mirror and see her younger self, older now and this is how she is doing it.

Last visit we got her a simple remote control for the TV because she kept hitting buttons and ruining connection but she also wouldn't ask for help so no TV. This is what we got https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0CR5S1BCN/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&th=1



Also, I was thinking of making a bunch of copies of older photos. My SIL got her new photos of grandkids and put them all over the place but I am pretty sure she has no idea who any of the people are and might be way more comforted by old photos of her grandparents and aunts and uncles.

 

[Imzadi]

and might be way more comforted by old photos of her grandparents and aunts and uncles.

Likewise, if she or her mother or grandmother used to be a knitter or crocheter, she might feel comforted by a crocheted granny square throw over her chair or bed.

 

[LuvOrlando]

Likewise, if she or her mother or grandmother used to be a knitter or crocheter, she might feel comforted by a crocheted granny square throw over her chair or bed.

Oh my, she does have an ancient brown blanket just like this. I am not sure of the origins but I bet someone she loved made it for her, I'll try to find it and bring it.

 

[barkley]

I think the beauty parlor idea is great, or personal care products. When my great-aunt (passed at 94) was in a home, we brightened her whole day with a bottle of nail polish and a manicure. It made her feel pretty! Similarly, I had an uncle whose one request was...a tube of Fixodent. Favorite food items are a good choice, too.

I like the idea of music, too--possibly a CD player with headphones (a person in memory care might not be able to manage an iPod, they're a more recent invention).

with an ipod custom play lists could be set up so if she has any favorite singers or particular style of music it could be preloaded.

The hair stuff is a great idea but in our case what we thought was her neglecting hair turns out to be a choice, she said so last time we saw her when she got a trim but refused a cut. When she was a teen MIL had very long thick hair, when she became a RN and a mom she cut it all so I never knew her with long hair again. Seems to me she wants to look in the mirror and see her younger self, older now and this is how she is doing it.

Last visit we got her a simple remote control for the TV because she kept hitting buttons and ruining connection but she also wouldn't ask for help so no TV. This is what we got https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0CR5S1BCN/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&th=1

View attachment 858579

Also, I was thinking of making a bunch of copies of older photos. My SIL got her new photos of grandkids and put them all over the place but I am pretty sure she has no idea who any of the people are and might be way more comforted by old photos of her grandparents and aunts and uncles.

does she have a dvd player? so many older tv shows are available now on dvd so if she has any favorites it might be something she would enjoy.

 

[Imzadi]

I like the idea of music, too--possibly a CD player with headphones (a person in memory care might not be able to manage an iPod, they're a more recent invention).

with an ipod custom play lists could be set up so if she has any favorite singers or particular style of music it could be preloaded.

A CD could be burned with all the favorite songs. CDs are making a comeback.

So are the old boomboxes. They have big buttons and are more stable to press, sitting on a table than fumbling with the little portable CD players. You can still attach headphones with a nice long cord.

https://www.amazon.com/Gelielim-Bluetooth-Headphone-Compatible-MP3-White/dp/B0BV65YB8P/

Or this one has a cassette recorder/player if she's more comfortable with cassettes. You can make a few mix tapes for her. It has a USB drive, so you can just plug in your smartphone and I think record songs from it to a cassette.

https://www.amazon.com/Greadio-Cassette-Bluetooth-Recording-Headphone/dp/B09ZTKYLSH/

 

[disykat]

My favorite gift to get my mom is coffee table picture books. You can find things that aren't juvenile.

She can enjoy them independently without having to follow a story line. I can write her name clearly on it and write "Happy Birthday from...."etc. inside the front cover so she knows it belongs to her and that we gave it to her. She gets upset if she thinks people are entering her room and leaving things that "don't belong to her" because in her mind that means people are stealing her things too.

Mom's favorite book that I often find near her favorite chair is a book with lots of pictures of all different breeds of dogs. Inside the cover I wrote the names and breeds of dogs she's known and loved. (Writing that, it just occurred to me I need to glue some of their pictures in there!)

If you're looking for something really practical, my mom likes her clock with the day/date etc. with the time. Honestly she could use about three more because she can't remember to look at it but enjoys it when she sees it. "Oh, it's Tuesday. I've been wondering!"

In the future, when you have time, a small photo album with loved ones and their names etc. in it is a great idea. I had made one for dad and now mom has it. I keep meaning to make mom a laminated family tree with pictures, because I think she'd like that more than the album, but I haven't gotten around to it yet. She seems to keep track of laminated pages and booklets pretty well. When dad passed I made her some laminated pages and a booklet and she treasures them. I think they're less overwhelming than an actual album?

 

[jo-jo]

Those CD players or whatever, do they come with bluetooth? I'd be a little worry with an older person with earphones with a cord. Easy to get tangled or caught on something or a tripping hazard.

I have headband headphones. I love them. No chance of falling out. I can do chores all day while listening to a book.