Brides who DON'T want their dad to walk them down the aisle...

[LiLIrishChick63]

This is exactly what my own mother and I are going through now. I absolutely dread doing wedding shopping with her. However, she did agree to my budget so she has to be included.

i never asked for money from my parents, i didn't expect any. but they did give me a bit. however, she CONSTANTLY held it over my head anytime something didn't go the way she wanted. "well i gave you money for this, this is the LEAST you could do!" and everytime i'd tell her "i'll give you the money back...it's really not a problem."

my mother....she has issues. she also wanted to celebrate her birthday during my bridal shower. she was all gung-ho about getting her own cake and having everyone sing to her, and i talked to my MOH and she said "oh there's no WAY that's happening" and managed to talk her out of it. half the people at the shower didn't even know my mother, anyway. they were my friends and my co-workers.

she also still baders me, 2 years later, that i didn't wear a veil

 

[Tamarap]

Your situation reminds me exactly like mine. My dad will absolutely not be walking me down the aisle. My maternal grandfather will be.

This is what I did. I had a very strained relationship with my dad and my grandfather had played a very important role in my life when my dad wasn't around. When the time came for me to get married I wanted both to walk me down the aisle. At first my dad agreed and then called to say he changed his mind and understood that I still wanted my grandfather and he wouldn't stand in the way of that. My dad attended my wedding but my grandfather walked my down the aisle and gave me away.

 

[Robinrs]

WOW! Some of those comments are completely CRAZY.

Are you sure they're not DISers????

 

[Disneylover79]

I am definitely having my dad walk me down the aisle....now the question is do I have my mom join us (we are best friends) or do I have her stand up when we get to her and come join us on my other arm that way when they ask who gives this woman both my parents can say "we do"...so now I need to figure that out...

 

[cm8]

Are you sure they're not DISers????

are you stirring the pot, You had me out of breath, I know you were just being sarcastic right

 

[Uuaww]

My biggest fear is that my sisters will ask me to walk them down the aisle. Our dad is currently in poor health and if he passes before they get married... I don't know what they will do. One of my biggest hopes is that he is around long enough to do this for them. I mean, they are only 29 and 27... and asking your younger brother to do it... oy.

 

[castleview]

My dad walked me down the aisle, but not my sister. Her attitude was that she "wasn't my dad's to give away and not her fiance's to receive". It didn't bother her fiance or me, but my dad was hurt. Of course my dad is annoyingly traditional and self-centered - my sister paid for the whole thing and my dad was ticked because "he should be able to invite my friends to my daughter's wedding"...like his friends wanted to be there.

I don't think it's necessary to have your dad walk you down the aisle. If I were to do it again, I probably wouldn't. I had a cookie cutter wedding that I would do differently now if I did it again.

 

[punkin]

WOW! Some of those comments are completely CRAZY. I had both of my parents walk with me as they both raised me. I think people should do what is best for themselves and their situation.

This. Definitely!

 

[castleview]

i never asked for money from my parents, i didn't expect any. but they did give me a bit. however, she CONSTANTLY held it over my head anytime something didn't go the way she wanted. "well i gave you money for this, this is the LEAST you could do!" and everytime i'd tell her "i'll give you the money back...it's really not a problem."

my mother....she has issues. she also wanted to celebrate her birthday during my bridal shower. she was all gung-ho about getting her own cake and having everyone sing to her, and i talked to my MOH and she said "oh there's no WAY that's happening" and managed to talk her out of it. half the people at the shower didn't even know my mother, anyway. they were my friends and my co-workers.

she also still baders me, 2 years later, that i didn't wear a veil

Oh Good Lord! I wore a small veil and my dad was disgusted that I didn't have it covering my face. Fortunately, my step-mother told him to get with the times.

Have to laugh at your MOH. I swear my job when I did it for a friend was simply being a bad guy telling her future in-laws "NO NO NO".

 

[lizandjason]

I'm really enjoying hearing everyone's stories! It just goes to show that everyone is different. I'm so happy to see everyone here being kind and respectful. It's very refreshing compared to the comments left on aol.

 

[ZephyrHawk]

I didn't want my dad to walk me down the aisle, poor relationship as some others have mentioned. But then I really didn't want a daddy-daughter dance. I decided to pick my battles.

 

[binny]

We all do what we have to do. I would have loved to have my dad walk me down the aisle but he died 6 weeks before my wedding. So his friend, and the pastor who married us, walked me down the aisle instead.

I have 3 brothers so I didnt feel like I could choose between them. In retrospect I should have honoured all 3 of them and had them all walk me down the aisle.

I think everyone should do whats best for them.

 

[Mrs. Charming]

My dad just kind of assumed he would, so he did. We had the smaller Disney wedding, so there was no rehearsal. Ahh well. I kinda wanted to walk alone. (we haven't been the closest, my parents are divoroced, my dad moved 11h away...)

It was a whole 15 seconds of my life.. so I'm not too upset about it.

But to call people names and say nasty things about brides who do what they want? Horrible.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

My father wasn't even invited to my wedding. My parents divorced when I was 2 and I had no relationship with my father. He burned his bridges when I was 14 and we never spoke again. I grew up with my mother and grandparents; Grandpa would have done the honors, but he was in a nursing home. I am also an only child. Therefore, my mother walked me down the aisle.

 

[angie@dvcstore]

If i get married i want both of my parents to walk me down the aisle they both have done a wonderful job in raising me but i respect the decisions any bride makes as to who should walk her down i mean it is her day and people need to respect that.

 

[a1tinkfans]

I walked down the aisle with both my mom and my dad. I also wore my moms wedding gown
And if it weren't for her I would not have grown up on Disney!!

My 25th Wedding Anniversary is this year (my High School Sweetheart, we're actually together 33 years).
I Wish my mom were still here to celebrate with us, she was taken way too young and way too soon !

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I wish it actually occurred to me that I had an actual choice. I really wish my backbone was in place at that time. To this day, I regret my decision to have my father "give me away". It was extremely inappropriate on all accounts. And though I have issues with my mommy, it would have been 1000% more appropriate to have her walk me down the aisle.

It just never occurred to me that indeed "no", I didn't owe it to my father to allow him that honor.

And the walk down--I so wanted to put duct tape over his mouth. He just wouldn't shut up about how to properly walk down.

 

[taylor3297]

I did have my dad walk me down the aisle because he is a great dad. Though some people wondered why dh and I didn't cut the wedding cake together, why I didn't do the garter and I only threw a bouquet because at the last minute one was put in my hand.

We are not into cutting the cake and feeding it to each other thing. I always hated that part of wedding. As to the garter and the bouquet, just never made sense to me at all.

As long as the bride and groom are happy with how the wedding is set up that should be ok.

 

[Handbag Lady]

My dad walked me down the aisle but in no way did he give me away.

I don't understand the hurtful words and why that is even needed. To each their own.

I had a gal pal once who had her birth father walk her half way, then her step father took over for a few steps, and then she hoofed the rest of the way on her own. I thought that was very clever.

 

[purplegirl247]

My dad walked me down the aisle, but instead of the "who gives this bride away" language, we had the officiant say: "The couple asked that we forego the line 'who gives this woman?' and instead opted for more inclusive wording. To that end, who shares this woman with your family, making her as one of your own? [his family said "we do"] Who shares this man with your family, making him as one of your own? [my family said "we do"]

The fact that we had a very small, family-only wedding helped, but I thought it was nice to have everyone participate.