You might think I'm abrasive, but.....

[Beth E. (NJ)]

Hi DISLOVE and welcome to the DIS!

Originally posted by DISLOVE
Although I know that this is a very judgemental comment, I stand by it 100%.

Well, at least you admitted that your post might be viewed as judgemental so you won't be bothered if people think it is.

I do take some offence to your comment:

If you leave your child alone with a stranger (disney employee or the greeter at Walmart) in a private room you are not being a good parent.

If that's the case than there are a lot of bad parents in the world.

 

[justhat]

I currently work part-time at a preschool with 1.5-2.5 year olds and I often baby-sit for some of the kids in my class, and recently the 2.5 yo cousin of one of my kids, though I had never met him. I had never babysat for the kid in my class so his mother only referred me to her SIL based upon the fact that her 2yo son seems to like me. Now, I only worked there 3 hours a day, 4 days a week at that time, and the amount of time she met me consisted of 5 minutes a day when picking up her son. So how did she know I'm a safe person to leave with her barely verbal nephew? You might think it's because we're all screened with background checks, however in the year and a half that I've been working there, I know many people who also work there who were never screened. They simply forgot to get their fingerprints done and they're still employed, some working with kids 2 mos-1.5 years, kids who are not verbal. Was this mom a bad mom for leaving me with her son though she didn't know much about me? I don't think so, I think you have to take some risks and you hope that the outcome is okay. Unfortunately it's not always the case, but there's really little you can do to prevent that, as I have shown in my example at our preschool, where you think your child is with screened employees and in fact they could be any random weirdo. So leaving your kids in school while you're at work is just as much a risk as leaving them for a few hours on vacation, both are risks that to me seem okay to take. And yes, you can say that a babysitter you have at home is okay for your kids since you have heard form others that they're good. Well how do you know that? Because other parents said they're kids were okay? As someone else said, lots of abused kids don't tell and act okay, especially the youngest ones who really can't communicate to you that something happened. So the excuse that leaving your kids with a sitter at home is safer than on vacation really doesn't hold water, since that person was new to you at one time too and they really could have done anything to your child and you might not know about it. No matter where or with whom you leave your child, it's a risk, but it's a small risk in my opinion and to devalue another parent for doing so is ridiculous.

 

[Planogirl]

My goodness, thanks for letting us know exactly what YOU think. I would hate to know what you think of parents that use daycare.

People have always used babysitters in order to go out. Yes, there are creeps out there unfortunately. But this stat that you cited is interesting: "* 98% of sexual abuse that occurs in a day care setting is perpetrated by women". I imagine that's true since the vast majority of day care providers are women. You didn't mention that most sexual abuse does NOT occur at daycare centers though.

 

[Blondiex46]

I agree, but I thought DW was for kids anyways, I for one would not go if I didn't have them, but that is just me

 

[ducklite]

Originally posted by Planogirl
I think that people should do what works best for their families. I've taken my only child to Disney clubs in the past partially because he wanted to get away from Mom once in a while and hang out with other kids.

I second this opinion!!

Especially when you have an only child, they need time to socialize with their peers.

When our son was younger, we would put him in the kids clubs for a few hours once or twice during a trip. He begged to go, we enjoyed a few hours of "adult" time.

We didn't use an in room sitter until he was twelve. Too young to be left alone, and we wanted to stay out later than the kids clubs were open one night.

I'm not sure that I would have left him with an in-room sitter at a young age, but I also think that's a personal decision that each family needs to make.

It's not up to a person on an Internet MB to dictate what is right or wrong for anyone else but themselves.

Anne

 

[ducklite]

Originally posted by Jynohn
As for in-room babysitting, there's no way on earth. It would make me way too nervous to leave my child alone in a BEDROOM with a complete stranger

Pardon me, but if someone is going to do something harmful to your child, do you really think it matters if it's a bedroom or a broom closet?

Anne

 

[mellbe113]

We were at the Poly in August and used both the in room babysitter and neverland club. My daughter(7) adored both. We used the in room service since we were going to the late luau and would not be back till at least 11:00pm. My daughter goes to bed at 8:00pm and it made more sense to let her have a babysitter and not wreck her routine. She was sleeping when we got home and had a blast. I felt no safety concerns regarding using the service guaranteed, booked and recomended by Disney.

 

[ToriLammy]

Originally posted by Blondiex46
I agree, but I thought DW was for kids anyways, I for one would not go if I didn't have them, but that is just me

So now we've gone from "Parents shouldn't use a babysitter or childcare at WDW" to adults without children probably shouldn't go to Disneyworld at all? Geez, I feel sorry for all those people who don't have kids or who have grown kids. No more WDW for them

Originally posted by Planogirl
People have always used babysitters in order to go out. Yes, there are creeps out there unfortunately. But this stat that you cited is interesting: "* 98% of sexual abuse that occurs in a day care setting is perpetrated by women". I imagine that's true since the vast majority of day care providers are women. You didn't mention that most sexual abuse does NOT occur at daycare centers though.

Well, now why would someone provide the truth and facts that don't support his/her agrument. It's so much easier to try and frighten people by giving them half facts and statistics then to really try to enlighten them by giving them all the facts and letting them make up their own minds. But then what do I know, I'm probably considered a bad parent

Tori

 

[momof3disneyholics]

OOOOH, I have to get in on this. There are points on both sides of the argument that I agree with. I think if I worried about my kids being safe everytime they were away from me, I would be not able to function at work and it would drive me crazy!.
My husband and I never go out and that it not an understatement. We never get out by ourselves. I can't tell you how many times we have been at Disney and thought about how nice it would be to have a little adult time, to be able to try that nice quiet place to eat, to be able to enjoy some of those bigger rides together. I don't feel like we have any options though, our kids are 3, 3, and 6. One of my 3 year olds is autistic and requires alot of care. If Disney offered daycare type settings for smaller children, we would probably really consider it. The in room thing for us is not an option because I just can't trust someone alone with my child if I don't know them, but then that is my opinion only. I think it is great if you are relaxed enough and your child is relaxed enough to be able to handle that. My husband and I just can't mainly because of my autistic son. I do think that married couples should have times together because it helps strengthen the bond between them and children are happier with parents that are happier. But, for us, for now, we will not have those late nights out even with the kids because our kids cannot function out after about 8pm. I will never be one of those parents dragging their kids along while the kids stopped having fun hours ago.
I will say this though, when we went in May, my six year old wanted to stay up one night, so he and I went and had a little "date" that consisted of ice cream and swimming at night. That was so much fun and he enjoyed the time with just me that we plan on doing that again when we go in Nov (probably not the late swimming though, might be too cool) It really made me feel closer to this cool little kid that calls me Mom.
Just my 2 cents

 

[madscrapper]

Why is it that parents, instead of supporting each other and recognizing our differences, tend to criticize. Everyone of us has different life experiences which guide how WE raise OUR children. I'm always interested to hear ideas and tips from friends, but those ideas don't always work for my family. That's okay.

If we really want to protect our children from a greater chance of harm than abuse from a sitter...

- make sure your child wears a helmet while on a bike, skateboard, scooter, rollerblades
- have your child in an age appropriate car seat - this includes a booster for the older kids and that the seat is installed and used properly in the rear seats
- make sure all vaccinations are current (yes, this is another touchy topic) and your child has yearly check-up
- finish all antibiotics

and on and on...there are so many other saftey issues that have the potential to devastate a family we can go NUTS thinking of them all.

Lighten up, have fun on vacation no matter what YOUR childcare choices.

Jeannine

 

[Jynohn]

Originally posted by ducklite
Pardon me, but if someone is going to do something harmful to your child, do you really think it matters if it's a bedroom or a broom closet?

Anne

I thought we were discussing in-room babysitting, but for the record, no I wouldn't leave my child alone in a broom closet with a stranger either....

Jynohn

(hoping to lighten things up a little here...)

 

[jiminy]

Well, since most abuse against children is caused by people that the CHILDREN KNOW, I certainly hope you parents who are being so judgemental about "stranger" care NEVER let your child out of your sight.....EVER. Because who knows, grandma, grandpa, uncle, aunt, cousin???? Sure you trust them, but so did hundreds of thousands of other parents whose children were abused by them!

 

[Beth E. (NJ)]

Leaving your child with a sitter in any setting is a personal decision in any situation whether at home or on vacation. We can only do what's right for us and our families. While this thread has stayed in good form I'm going to close it now as I believe it has run it's course and I would hate to see it stray into areas where people could feel hurt for their opinions.

I hope everyone has a Disney day!