You might think I'm abrasive, but.....

[susaninMS]

here I go, anyway. I am really, really shocked at the amount of folks who would *actually* leave their child in the room with a total stranger!!! Even if the child is asleep before the person got there, what if they woke up and saw that mommy and daddy were gone and a total stranger was staring back at them. Certified or not--a stranger is still a stranger to a child.

I realize that adults need time alone--but my word....you're on vacation at WDW. Can you *not* stay as a family for that length of time? My DH and I can go several months w/o a dinner out alone.

We will be leaving Oct. 4 for our first trip to WDW and we have 2 girls, ages 6 and 5. I realize that Disney is not *only* for hte children, but I truly think that if you have your children with you, then YES, it is ALL ABOUT THE CHILDREN....

Okay....enough of my venting for the night. I don't want to step on anyone's toes....well, yes, maybe I do.....

 

[scorpad99]

I absolutely agree with you...............I have a 6 and an almost 8 y/o and I seldom leave them with people I know, let alone a complete stranger. People think because it`s Disney , its safe and nothing will happen. There are alot of sickos in this world, is it worth a few hours out on the town?
If you feel the need to go out when the kids are asleep then I`d suggest bringing along a babysitter that you know well, trust and that your kids will feel comfortable staying with
I think by 9-10 o`clock I`ll be passed out cold even if the kids arent tired out!

 

[crazymomof4]

Originally posted by susaninMS


I realize that adults need time alone--but my word....you're on vacation at WDW. Can you *not* stay as a family for that length of time? My DH and I can go several months w/o a dinner out alone.

We will be leaving Oct. 4 for our first trip to WDW and we have 2 girls, ages 6 and 5. I realize that Disney is not *only* for hte children, but I truly think that if you have your children with you, then YES, it is ALL ABOUT THE CHILDREN....

I couldn't agree w/ you more! When looking at WDW info. I skip right over the parts about childcare and children only programs and the like. When my mom came w/ us, the past 3 trips, DH and I would go out to dinner alone once during the trip, while she stayed w/ the kids. That's enough for us. We had plenty of "alone time" before kids came, and as fast as our babies are growing, it will be no time at all before they are all teens and older and DH and I will do everything as a couple again.

 

[Danemom]

While I can see how the in-room babysitting could be nice for people with older children, I would also never use it. I agree that, for my family, WDW is all about spending time together. But, we only go every 2-3 years. If we went more often, it might be easier to justify some alone time for DH and me.

I am a preschool teacher and deal often with separation anxiety. I wonder how many children spend most of the time their parents are out crying? I know I would never enjoy myself and I would be worrying and constantly checking in.

 

[Planogirl]

I think that people should do what works best for their families. I've taken my only child to Disney clubs in the past partially because he wanted to get away from Mom once in a while and hang out with other kids. And yes, also because I wanted to eat a quiet meal and ride a few thrill rides. No tears on his part, I made sure of that. Well, except for once when I picked him up. But this is what has worked best for us and I fully support those who do the same.

 

[~Sparkly~Zoe]

I agree, I could never do this. It's a family vacation and that means doing things together. I could not trust someone that I didn't know to watch my kids.No in-room sitting for us. Now the clubs where the kids go play for an hr or so, that's like leaving them for kindergarden, preschool with other kids doing things.

If we want to be alone, then we would take a vacation without the kids.

 

[4greatboys]

My 2 oldest are a little to old for child care--they are 13 and 16 but I do have a 3 yr old and a 1 yr old. I could see leaving them at one of the Disney childcare centers when they are older if thats what they wanted to do. But I really have a problem with leaving them in the room--one on one--with a stranger. Im sure the ladies are very nice and I have read reports of many a happy child, but it just wouldnt work for us.
Our last trip all 6 of us went around to all the parks. The younger ones did great, we took turns giving each the chance to pick the attractions they wanted to visit and if someone else didnt care for it they just waited then we did theirs. It is more work but worth it I think.

 

[Jynohn]

I was thinking the same thing, but didn't want to come across as being judgemental.

While I would even be a little anxious about leaving my 4 year old at one of the clubs, I do think that she would have fun, and I would possibly consider it.

As for in-room babysitting, there's no way on earth. It would make me way too nervous to leave my child alone in a BEDROOM with a complete stranger to ever enjoy myself. It's horrible to think about, and I'm sure that the majority, if not all, in-room sitters are very nice people, still it only takes one sicko...

If we feel like checking out the comedy club or Adventurer's Club at Pleasure Island, then I guess my husband and I will just have to take turns. Otherwise, I agree with the OP's. This is a family vacation, and WDW is a very child-friendly place to take your kids to restaurants, etc. There'll be plenty of time to go out with just the grownups later...

 

[crisi]

Its a managed risk. We all take managed risks with our children.

Its dangerous to let my kid ride his bike on the road. But I do it (under supervision, but really, if he is going to get hit by a car, what am I going to do, throw myself in front of it to slow it down before it kills him).

I put my kids on a plane to take them to Disney. We don't HAVE to do this, and there is a small risk that the plane will go down and we will all die. But the risk is so small that its negligible.

Same for in room child care. Sure, the childcare worker could be a wacko, but in reality, the risk of that is so small that it is a risk many people find worth taking.

Some people find that their vacations are much more enjoyable when they take a small break from their children for adult time. So what if that isn't your cup of tea? You aren't in their shoes. Maybe the children are especially challenging. Maybe Mom and Dad have discovered that time without the kids helps keep their marriage stable and happy. Maybe they just enjoy time seperate.

We haven't (and won't because my kids are old enough now for the kids clubs - and we have been traveling with a sitter) left my kids with strangers at Disney. But I can understand why someone would. Some kids don't have a lot of stranger anxiety (I do think letting your little one fall asleep before the babysitter arrives may be setting your kid up for a traumatic wake, but then, some kids (both mine have always been this way) can be depended on to sleep for about five hours from when they first fall asleep - nothing can wake them until that time) and will happily play with a sitter. And if it makes for a more pleasant vacation for everyone.....

 

[Jordan's MOM]

I am so glad to hear there are others like me! No way would i ever leave a child in a hotel with a stranger. I often avoid these theads on child care at WDW because i do feel strongly about this subject. As a preschool director that has worked her way up through every aspect of care of children, I know that "most" child care situations are safe, but i also know how very hard it is to tell who might not be safe. Even the best companies can not know everything about every employee. DH and i do go away alone sometime, but DS is home in the safe and loving care of grandma when we do. I however do not want to start or be part of a debate. This is MY opinion and just that. I won't judge others.


Jordan's mom

 

[Jynohn]

Crisi-

I agree with what your saying, to a point. Yes, we all take risks everyday. We have no choice, unless we never want to leave our houses and want our kids to grow up in a bubble. However, there's a difference between taking a risk driving your kids to school each morning and hoping that you won't get in an accident, and taking an un-necessary risk like leaving them alone with a complete stranger.

Believe me, I know what it's like to be at the end of your rope with the kids and just need a little adult time, but in that case, why not do as others have suggested and bring along another relative or trusted sitter, or even use the child care clubs where at least there's safety in numbers? Most people, if they leave their kids with a sitter at home, at least know of them from the neighborhood, other parents, etc. In this case, you have NO idea who these people are. I agree that the chances that something would happen are slim to none, but still why take a chance if you don't have to?

As for jumping in front of the car, I think most if not all of us here would do just that! Not that it would help much, but instinct just would take over...

 

[tjmw2727]

OMG - I left my 5yo and 7yo at the kids club at AKL while dh and I had a much needed dinner alone at Boma. My girls were happy to see us after dinner but still didn't want to leave the kids club. It was a big part of the vacation for us all and they want to go to a kids club again. Shoot me now@@! Man I must be awful to let me kids be kids while us grown ups were grown ups. Its been a year an they are still fine, well adjusted and doing well in school. DH and I still remember fondly our night alone and can't wait to do it agin.

Ok lets admit it, its nice to have choices, my choices are not your choices but its nice to have them. I never judge people by the choices they make. I probably would not choose in room babysitting but many do and its nice to have a safe option if you choose it. I am no better or worse a parent because I don't choose that option -just a different parent than you.

Obviously many people want or need in room sitting so disney provides a safe option. Be thankful you have other options and can spend your entire vacationwith kiddos and leave it at that.

I love the fact that my girls like and ask for a night at the kids club. DH and I have no options at home and feel comfortable leaving our girls at the wdw resort kids clubs while we have a night out. I think they like the time alone as much if not more than dh and I.

When you live my life than you can judge my choices. I would no more say "how can you not choose babysitting' than say
how can you choose babyistting" Either and both are fine - we live in AMERICA and we have freedom to choose.

TJ

 

[debra1970]

count me in....living in PA, I am going to disney as a family...therefore, if my hubby and I need time alone, it will be done some other time when I can leave my son with a relative or at least somebody that I know and trust. I can't even think of doing something at WDW without him. Anyway, since he was born 6 years ago, I am usually ready for bed before him, so the thoughts of partying after hours is outta the question here.

Deb

 

[Jynohn]

TJ-

I'm not sure if your post was directed towards me or not, but if so I don't think you read me correctly. I was not saying that someone who leaves their children with sitters in WDW is a terrible parent, just that it's a choice that I wouldn't make myself.

The original poster in this thread gave an opinion, and I happened to agree with them. I've never posted in other threads when people have asked about childcare options, because they were looking for information, not my opinion. I don't think agreeing with the OP's and voicing my opinions in this thread makes me judgemental. As you pointed out, this is America, and I have a right to voice my opinions too.

I'm not out to change anyone's mind here, and I certainly didn't intend to insult anyone or judge anyone's parenting skills, I was just saying how "I" felt about the situation for "my" family. YMMV.

Hope we can leave it at that as I don't really want to start an argument...

 

[susaninMS]

From what I have read, there is a difference in the kids club and the actual in-room sitting. In the clubs, there is surely more than 1 child and 1 adult--many of both, I suppose ('specially the adults). This seems to be in literally a "public" place, unlike the rooms.....

Yes--we all have opinions--and that is a great thing!! I just truly think that when on vacation, keep it a family thing. There's time to be alone and have a nice sit-down meal w/o the children before you leave or after you get home. I really don't think anyone here has "judged" anyone.....and like I said, it might be abrasive....

 

[helenm29]

Hi Everyone! I am NOT one of those that totally agree with you on this one . I agree that Disney is for children DURING THE DAY TIME! I see nothing wrong with having your children stay at one of the Disney Day Care Centers as long as it's not too late in the evening. They are well staffed and have different areas for kids of different ages. I will admit that on one of the nights we are at D/W we would like to have a nice, quiet dinner but I feel totally comfortable leaving them. I have 10 year old twins and a 16 year old so it's not such a hard decision but if they were smaller...maybe I would think a little harder about it. Does any of this make sense? I just think that it's up to you to decide what is better for your children but don't rule out what other people might think is right for theirs.

 

[Planogirl]

We spend family time together all year around and not just during vacation. It sounds like maybe some people only have the chance spend family time together during vacation so maybe this is why some feel the need to spend every single minute with each other. We're almost always enjoying activities together aside from school and job so splitting up occasionally is no big deal for us. But again, whatever works for everyone is certainly fine with me and even if I didn't agree, I wouldn't point to anyone as being "wrong".

 

[mcnuss]

Ok lets admit it, its nice to have choices, my choices are not your choices but its nice to have them. I never judge people by the choices they make. I probably would not choose in room babysitting but many do and its nice to have a safe option if you choose it. I am no better or worse a parent because I don't choose that option -just a different parent than you.

Amen Sister!

First let me say that I truly believe the OP's goal here was to start a debate, simply bc this topic always does. And I hate to be this susceptible to the bait, but I am...oh well.

I would no sooner judge you for the choices you make than eat raw liver for breakfast. I am 100% certain that you make choices I would never make, but I cannot judge what you do. I can't judge if yours is the kid out there w/o a helmet. I can't judge if you're the woman I saw yelling at her kid today in the supermarket, or if you're the one who never comes to the school events. I can only assume you are doing the best you can in this difficult, troubled world. It's all any of us can do.

I agree with crisi, there are risks to everything in this world. Things can and will happen no matter how vigilant you are. Using a babysitter, yes, technically a stranger, is a leap of faith, whether it's in a hotel room, a day care setting, my home, whatever. I choose to believe most people are good. With respect to this specific situation, of course, I suppose there could be a wacko in the corps of babysitters. But what are the real chances? These people are fingerprinted, background checked, trained, the works, before they are hired. It's not like they could get away with anything - the employer knows who they are, where they are, etc..., and the employees know this as well. Could something happen? Of course. I am not naive. But I also know that you never really know anyone anyway, and that more abuse is committed by family members and significant others of family members than by any other group. So does that mean I shouldn't leave my DD with my cousin's husband? I mean, statistically he's a risk, right? But it sounds absurd when I say it. I can hear you thinking "That's not the same!". But isn't it really? It's a choice based on the relative risk of a situation.

Let's try not to forget that for some people, this is the only vacation they will have for years. Only a few of us can afford to travel with a babysitter or a family member. Many of us on these boards are privileged to return to WDW time and time again. Can you please try to stand in the shoes of the couple who has scrimped and saved for a "trip of a lifetime" and who would like one night out at a nice restaurant w/o kids? Some of you imply pretty strongly that this is selfish. I think it's lovely and I hope they have a wonderful time. In fact, I hope everyone has a wonderful time at WDW.

 

[taylor1293]

Although in-room sitting isn't something I would choose for my children, I don't see anything wrong with it.

As for leaving our children with strangers, we do this repeatedly over their lifetime. To most of us, their teachers, daycare providers, coaches, and friends parents are strangers. Having met them a few times or even having visited their house doesn't make them any less of a stranger when it comes to dangerous situations they could place our children in.

This situation is no different. The setting is only different.

I can not recall of a situation where a child who was watched by a reputable company was willfully harmed by their in-room caregiver. Do we really think Disney would suggest a specific company if their employees weren't reputable? Think of the damage that could do to Disney's reputation and business!

Anyway, it's not a situation I feel comfortable with personally, so we don't do it. However, when my youngest is older, I can guarantee you that the kids clubs will have our business!

Teresa

 

[DisneyPhD]

We researched in room sitters and was set to use one in March 2003 when DD was 23 months old. We din't use it because she got sick, we used the money for Centra Care to see a Dr. instead and I wouldn't dream of leaving her when she was under the weather.


Since then it turns out we didn't need one because we were traveling with family members. However I think I would use one for one night if the situation was right. Our WDW vacations are tipically one week or longer, and that is a long time to never get a break longer then nap time, and then you are stuck in one room together. We rarely get sitters at home (even then it is tipically my Brother or Sister in law who owe us for years of baby sitting.) But after one week together, 24 7, with no breaks, only doing just what the kid wants a few hours of one and one time doing just what you want is priceless and makes everyone happier. It is much better then draging them along when they should be back in bed or to places they shouldn't be at in the 1st place (P.I.)

I agree, it is not pracitcal for all people to bring someone with them, and as said before these palces are professional agencies and this is their job. As also said before we take a risk with many things (taking our child to a new Dr. we never used before, starting a new day care center, etc..) Many people research on line and use names they got good referances from. In my opinon useing one of these in room sitters who are professional adult women is much safer then hiring the teenage girl down the street with no expernce and very likely could be inviting her boyfriend over to have sex with him on your couch after the kid goes to bed (happend to a friend of mine.)

I am gald in room sitting palces are avilable (since it is your only option with children under 4) and if the situation was right I would use them (but I haven't yet.) This does not make me a bad mom or care any less about my childs well being.