Screaming children

[KathAnn]

T&B

Have you been talking to MY Mum??! She says I should calm down a bit, that I take things too personally and Jess is plainly exhausted. 7 IVFs followed by an emergency C section would tire most women - but when you're a first-time, new Mum at aged 47 ...

I'll take and apply all advice I'm given. I actually WANT to be involved with Courtey - she's not wholly horrendous, I do have some good times with her. I never thought of baking with her, so I'll give it a try. I am the world's messiest cook anyway, so she'll be in good company. Thank heavens for a Steam Genie and a dishwasher!

Now, where do I send the choc chip cookies??!

Thanks.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

Oh, my, first time mom of a 2yo and she's 47. No wonder she's tired!

These times that you are spending with your niece will pay off in the long run. She will remember the special memories and you two can always stay close. One nice thing about doing things with kids is that you don't have to spend much money to have a great time and if I were you I would try to spend more time than money, if you know what I mean.

Things will get easier as she gets older and is better able to communicate what she is thinking.

I prefer oatmeal cookies--chocolate gives me migraines.

T&B

 

[Deb & Bill]

My take on little Courteney is that she used to be an only child at home. Now she goes to daycare and has to share HER mom with other kids. She no longer has her mother's undivided attention like she used to. In order to get Mom's attention, she now resorts to this impossible to ignore behavior and it works.

Grandad has always given her the attention she wants and she knows that he likes her as a pleasant quiet little angel. He's her refuge in the storm. So when mom and dad are tired from working, she calls Grandad and he's shows her the adoration that she is missing.

I may be full of it, but that's how I interpret this situation.

 

[KathAnn]

T&B, Deb and Bill: Thanks. I'm really grateful for your advice. Actually Jess is 49 (50 on Xmas Day!) - Courtey was born when she was 47.

A lot of interesting and informative things have been said. And I think 98% of it is right. Courteney is and will be an only child; she's also the youngest grandchild and only girl too. A huge fuss is always made of her and quite frankly Dad worships the ground she walks on. Jess helps out at the nursery because she can't bear to be parted from Courtey. She'll not go back to her full-time career untill Courtey goes to school (Jess is a lawyer), but that's at least 2 years off. Dad's gently suggested Jess go back one day a week to start with (starting after Christmas) but Jess won't budge as Courtey "needs her Mum". Jess is exhausted, she's lost too much weight and is painfully thin (US dress size 4 instead of a normal 8-10) and we're worried sick about her.

I think the best I can do is (1) try to remain calm; (2) be a bit more supportive; and (3) be a LOT less aggressive with either of them.

I truly appreciate everyone who's replied to my requests for help. I'll certainly attempt to be a lot more patient with both of my 2 and other "outsiders" as well.

K x

 

[NIK]

It's great that we are all so understanding and caring and sharing.

Just playing Devil's Advocate here, it's not so easy to be tolerant when you have spent a fortune on a meal/trip out or whatever and it is being spoiled by some ghastly little so and so whose parents don't seem interested in the nuisance their child is being.

There are always occasions when tolerance is a terrific virtue - if a child has behavioural or other problems I would not for one minute suggest that they spend their childhood missing out - I have a nephew who has recenlty been diagnosed with 'dyspraxia' [bet I spelt that wrong ] However, I would expect the parent of that child to be super-alert to the nuisance factor and not sit back smiling benignly while the little beggar disturbs all and sundry.

It isn't the ones who have the serious issues that get on your wick, it's the bad parents who seem to think the world is responsible for raising their kids and they can happily abdicate all responsibilty.

I'll get off my soapbox now!

 

[Tigger&Belle]

NIK, that's pretty much what most people here have agreed to. I don't think that anyones meal should be ruined due to an out of control child. Of course our definition of "ruin" could be different. Does one scream ruin a meal? I don't think so, but continued disruptive behavior should be removed from the restaurant or movie.

Should we only apply these rules to children's behavior? I've had more meals disrupted by adults talking loudly either with each other or while talking on cell phones during a meal. Maybe they should remove themselves!

Again...we should be bothered by disruptive behavior that continues by anyone, especially if we are bothered by it from children.

T&B

 

[Deb & Bill]

We were just at a Chinese restaurant last night for dinner. Now it was early, so the place wasn't that full. But one couple had four small children and they allowed them to run up and down the aisles in the restaurant while they sat at their table talking. There was a fish tank in the restaurant that the kids were trying to see, but it would have been nice if one of the parents had taken the kids over there instead of letting them run around. At least they went early in the evening and not later on when the restaurant would have been full.

 

[lenshanem]

Those damn fish tanks...

Unfortunately I know about the allure.

 

[taswira]

Originally posted by Tigger&Belle I've had more meals disrupted by adults talking loudly either with each other or while talking on cell phones during a meal. Maybe they should remove themselves!

I second that! My mother and I were <I>trying</I> to enjoy our very nice sit-down meal at WDW while a woman with 3 kids sat at the next table and spent the <I>entire meal time</I> talking loudly on her cell phone with it in 2-way radio "walkie talkie" mode, so we had to hear <I>both</I> sides of their entire conversation. I wish they had <I>never</I> added that feature to cell phones! And it <I>is</I> true that many adults, just as children, seem to try to speak louder than everyone in the room when conversing with others at their table. What's up with that?

And yes - I put that in the same category with screaming children. One scream or a 10-second fuss is bearable, just as is someone have a <I>quiet</I> and very <I>brief</I> cell conversation (as long as I don't have to hear both sides of it!). But long, loud cell or radio conversations and repetitive disruptive behavior (of child or adult - LOL) is not something to which Guests trying to enjoy themselves (and paying dearly for it!) should be subjected.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I also do not like the walkie-talkie feature on some cell phones! Like you pointed a out a person has to listen to both sides of the conversation and then there is the annoying static sounds! I can deal with that outside, but sure don't like it in a restaurant or store.

T&B

 

[NIK]

One way we have found of dealing with a Mobile Fone Fiend is to listen intently to their conversation - if they insist on bellowing their business in public.... - then loudly discuss what they have just said. It's amazing how quickly they turn down their volume

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I love it! Let's see if I can muster the courage to actually try it. Being subtle with people like that doesn't work--I've stared at people in disbelief, but they don't get it.

T&B

 

[SimbaCub]

I took some good friends of mine who have a special needs child to WDW a few years ago. I know this family well so I was prepared for the little things that go along with a special child. To be honest, I would take her and her mom again in a heart beat as I found her to behave in line with all 7 year olds. We are talking of going back in 2 years when she turns 12. I don't have a problem with kids--I have none--nor with their poor parents when it's their turn to have the upset child. My problem is with the small number of parents who don't feel they have to be parents. And I stress it's a small number. Looking at things through the eyes of a child--even if the little one is not mine--is a precious gift. . . Especially a special needs child who made a 3 word sentence will at WDW for only the 2nd time in her life!!

SimbaCub

 

[wintergreen]

I'd like to have one rant about screaming ADULTS. In the entry to the Haunted Mansion. My 7 yr-old DD is scared to death of this ride as a result of adults screaming ON PUROSE during the part where the entry goes dark for a second, and refuses to go on it again.

 

[jkovick]

HUH?

 

[vellamint]

I know exactly what they mean.....when you are in the stretch room. There are people who scream at the top of their lungs when the room goes dark...when you can look up and see you know who.

Thats a peeve of mine.......when I am standing right next to them and they blow out my ear drums because that is how loud they are and I can certainly see how a child would be afraid after that!!!!

 

[jkovick]

When I asked "huh?"I was questioning how being frightened in the HM related to this thread about parents who allow their children to be disruptive to other people.

 

[wintergreen]

I guess my point was that it is not only children that are sometimes loud and inconsiderate of other guests.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

My DH and I just returned last night from our adult trip (talk about fun!!!) and I witnessed my share of rude behavior from kids and adults. One VERY out of control child was (around 5yo) on the Halloween riverboat (my beef was with the adult who ignored his behavior for way too long and then barely did anything because she wanted to listen to the storytelling...

After reading this thead I really tried to pay attention to why kids were misbehaving and if my problem was with the child or the adults who didn't do anything to help or correct the situation. Well, the latter was almost always the case. Melt-downs happen with kids, but for adults to ignore disruptive kids is just plain rude.

Really, though, most of the people we encountered were wonderful and I have few complaints.

T&B

 

[Davids-Coco]

About the Haunted Mansion...

There were some children there at the same time as us. They were screaming and crying "I don't want to" and "I'm scared". It was so sad... the parents were saying "you'll like it" and "come on". I couldn't believe it. Needless to say, you could hear the children screaming though the entire ride and being very upset. I can't believe that the parents would do that to their kids.