Dummy and Nappy what to ditch first

[nancipants]

Our son rarely showed any signs of having to pee. Maybe grabbing his ***** once in awhile but that's it. We were mostly watching for dribbles.

Edit: Seriously, they block out the anatomically correct word for male genitalia?

 

[mjkacmom]

Our son rarely showed any signs of having to pee. Maybe grabbing his ***** once in awhile but that's it. We were mostly watching for dribbles.

Edit: Seriously, they block out the anatomically correct word for male genitalia?

And female as well. OP I found it was easier if there was a potty seat in the room that the child could get on and off easily unassisted, and get yo in seconds.

 

[Amy71452]

Today hasn't gone well, so we'll start completely clothes free again tomorrow. Thanks again all for the support.

She's VERY eager to be trying sitting on the toilet, hence why we're not using the potty at the moment

 

[VandVsmama]

Today hasn't gone well, so we'll start completely clothes free again tomorrow. Thanks again all for the support.

She's VERY eager to be trying sitting on the toilet, hence why we're not using the potty at the moment

The eagerness is a good thing. It's a sign that she's motivated. Rome wasn't built in a day. It'll happen. Just remain consistent. 1 success & 3 failures on day 1 is pretty good in my opinion.

 

[Amy71452]

Mini update (and sanity vent for me I hope people don't mind) she's been drinking a lot more,so more opportunities, so far today twice in the toilet when sat on it. Four accidents however, she's got no signs until she dribbles and she's never holding on for a long wee so we're not catching these. We'll probably go for another day at least with no clothes.

We had the tears flow after the third accident today, but she's still completely compliant and on board with sitting and trying when we tell her to

 

[Amy71452]

Sorry for bringing this up again, this has been a very hard weekend, we've not got anywhere closer than when we started, following all the advice. What am I doing wrong for her? We're going to have to go back to daycare tomorrow and will keep up training in the evenings (although need to talk to daycare as we've thrown out everything beyond our last two night pull ups), but I'm just heartbroken, as it should have clicked over this weekend at her age? I've not dropped the enthusiasm and encouragement for her, and she's tried so hard, I just don't know what we're doing wrong

 

[CGB]

I'm sorry this didn't go better for her this weekend. However, don't give in! Let your daycare know all the progress she made this weekend. The training may be more difficult for your daughter because she has went as long as she has in diapers. She's used to the diapers,... that's her comfort zone. And it's probably been reinforced in the past that when the training doesn't go well, the diapers come back out. Kids are smart! They figure that out quickly! Stay strong and see if the daycare will help you. For what it's worth, you're teaching your daughter perseverence.

 

[heidischm]

I'm not a doctor, but I don't think its fair to yourselves to her to assume it will be easier or faster since she is 4 (as opposed to younger). She has had more time to ingrain the habit of using a diaper and not needing to recognize the 'urge'. Don't beat yourselves up, parenting is hard! She'll get there. You can't change daycare, so at home just stay at whatever stage you need to for as long as you need to.

We used the naked butt method for all 3 of ours, but it didnt go the same for any of them. Our youngest had to do training twice, our 2nd took moonnnnttthhhs to figure out how to do #2 on the potty, and our 3rd got it in a few days pretty much on his own. Two are still in pullups at night. Good luck. You will all get past this!

 

[NotUrsula]

Don't beat yourself up; kids control this process, they know it, and it's different for every one. When you've heard a story about how X Method never takes more than 3 days, that's nonsense; that may be the average, but there are ALWAYS outliers.

We never tried any of those "intensive" methods just because we know our kids and know that they were all very stressed out by physical pressure; so it took months and a lot of bribes, but we did get there. (With mine that held out a long time, nothing we did really mattered in the end; peer pressure was the key.)

 

[VandVsmama]

I don't think it's reasonable to expect any kid to magically figure it out in 3 days' time.

Rome wasn't built in a day. Your childcare/daycare's policy is getting in the way, but there's nothing you can do about that. So just continue to be consistent at home. When your daughter is NOT in childcare, have her out of nappies/diapers.

 

[mousefan73]

Hi I preface this by saying I must be the worst parent in the world. My little girl is turning 4 at the end of the month and still has her dummies and hasn't yet potty trained. We've tried potty training but a house move, (our amazing) disney trip and the loss of both grandparents on DHs side a few weeks meant that whilst we've always made her a priority we've not been in the mindset to work on these unless she was showing interest, which she hasn't at all.

Well, we've got a new baby due in mid July and are panicking there's another barrier for us. And so I'm looking for any advice from anyone please! Should we be forcing both these through in the next month, should we hold off and master one or should we wait until the new baby settles and hope I'm not the worst parent to her.

Any advice would be at all appreciated , I've come here because I got lots of caring advice on planning our Disney trip so imagine this is a great supporting community.

Thank you so much!

Definitely the nappies first. The pacifiers a form of comfort I would leave that for last I would also maybe help with the stress of getting rid of the diapers.

 

[mousefan73]

I'll give it another go! We'd tried a few months ago but got nowhere, she's not shown interest or signs but she must be ready, we were waiting to see the doctor. We'll start today and pick up some pull ups and start to sit on the toilet every 30 mins. Any other good tips? Yep dummy is pacifier, she doesn't have it loads, I'd pick nappies first ideally because this is the most time consuming

My opinion a four-year-old shouldn’t be put on the potty every 30 minutes because physically speaking, they should know when there’s the urge to go You can’t compare four year-old to potty training a two-year-old where that makes more sense.

Does your child have some mille stone coming up? Worked for my kids for some reason mentally speaking they knew a three years old it’s over and overnight. They were potty trained. For our three-year-old when it was her birthday we took her to the Olive Garden. She was all excited. We told her that she’s such a big girl now and when we got home, she told me she had a poo and she did it, and that was the end of it . Of course there were accidents here and there was no “training” it just happened because our child knew it was time.

 

[mousefan73]

Ditto

 

[PollyannaMom]

Keep pushing for an appointment with her doctor. It's possible something medical is going on.

 

[robinb]

I feel your pain. My daughter was very difficult to potty train. The good news is that she did not start college in diapers. We tried absolutely everything suggested here (including naked butts) and elsewhere and what finally worked is that SHE became ready and wanted it for herself. Not us. Not her pre-school. Just her. She had no interest in stickers, or pleasing me or getting treats or toys. She was poop trained early at 2, but pee took until she was nearly 5. Being wet was really not a big deal for her and she was far too busy to stop what she was doing to use the bathroom. Plus, she was VERY strong willed and I think part of the delay was pushback from her. She *knew* what she needed to do, she just wasn't interested in doing it.

The fact is, that you cannot control another's bodily functions. I backed off and once she was good and ready, it finally happened. I think the idea of starting kindergarten was the impetus. I'm not sure what would have happened if her preschool wouldn't take her in pull ups.

 

[jo-jo]

I feel your pain. My daughter was very difficult to potty train. The good news is that she did not start college in diapers. We tried absolutely everything suggested here (including naked butts) and elsewhere and what finally worked is that SHE became ready and wanted it for herself. Not us. Not her pre-school. Just her. She had no interest in stickers, or pleasing me or getting treats or toys. She was poop trained early at 2, but pee took until she was nearly 5. Being wet was really not a big deal for her and she was far too busy to stop what she was doing to use the bathroom. Plus, she was VERY strong willed and I think part of the delay was pushback from her. She *knew* what she needed to do, she just wasn't interested in doing it.

The fact is, that you cannot control another's bodily functions. I backed off and once she was good and ready, it finally happened. I think the idea of starting kindergarten was the impetus. I'm not sure what would have happened if her preschool wouldn't take her in pull ups.

I wanted to read all the responses before added my own.

I second your thoughts. Some kids are just too busy to stop playing or whatever to go potty.

Momma don’t be discouraged. Some kids learn in two days, but a lot more take a few months. Just like some kids walk at 9 months, some at 15 months, but most around a year.

 

[Amy71452]

Hi all, just wanted to post a short update as thanks for all the moral support. Despite all our efforts since the last time I posted, whilst we have some success, we are still having many more accidents and she is yet to initiate. I've followed the advice and kept diligent throughout but, I as well as her need a short pause from this taking up all her time. Is this the right approach or is pausing the worst thing I can do even though we're both exhausted!

Sorry I couldn't share a huge success, and I appreciate all the advice on here still

 

[barkley]

Hi all, just wanted to post a short update as thanks for all the moral support. Despite all our efforts since the last time I posted, whilst we have some success, we are still having many more accidents and she is yet to initiate. I've followed the advice and kept diligent throughout but, I as well as her need a short pause from this taking up all her time. Is this the right approach or is pausing the worst thing I can do even though we're both exhausted!

Sorry I couldn't share a huge success, and I appreciate all the advice on here still

i think hyper focusing on can be overwhelming but i think you still need to stick with the potty training so it becomes (as it is) a natural process of relieving ones self in the appropriate depository. entirely stopping just puts you back at step one at a future date (and if becoming eligible for daycare is a concern it's better to be working on it soon vs. on a tight time crunch).

 

[Suger Mag]

I apologize if this has been brought up already. My first born was a late potty trainer. Life and highly absorbent pull ups got in the way lol.

In addition to the no clothes (we had a big T shirt but no undies). We found it really helpful to make a potty chart. We made essentially a big calendar on a poster board. We had stickers and stars. Every time there was a successful potty in the toilet they got to put a sticker on the chart. We used fancier stickers for the poops as that was more challenging than pee for our child. SInce they were also almost four they were very aware of the process. We knew we won when they were controlling the voids for extra stickers

 

[ronandannette]

Hi all, just wanted to post a short update as thanks for all the moral support. Despite all our efforts since the last time I posted, whilst we have some success, we are still having many more accidents and she is yet to initiate. I've followed the advice and kept diligent throughout but, I as well as her need a short pause from this taking up all her time. Is this the right approach or is pausing the worst thing I can do even though we're both exhausted!

Sorry I couldn't share a huge success, and I appreciate all the advice on here still

Hang in there. When you discuss it, what are your daughter’s thoughts on why she can’t get this to work? What is causing her to have the accidents? Obviously at this age she comprehends what the goal is. If she can articulate some inkling of what the problem is (just pulling examples out of thin air but say, she’s afraid of the flushing noise or finds stopping her activity inconvenient or whatever) maybe you could approach it from that angle.

Also wondering if you’ve made any progress in getting a medical consult? We’re in Canada so I well understand wait-lists, but if you have any access to private, fee-for-service professionals, now would be the time. Perhaps even a consult with a psychologist could be enlightening. I don’t want to shame or alarm you but under all the circumstances you’ve given us, there really must be something more going on to be delaying this very natural developmental milestone. Grace and peace - I wish you well.