Board Title (Please Read)

[wallyb]

You made another assumption about me. Just because I said I am queer, does not mean that I am gay. I am queer, meaning that I enjoy the company of either or a man or a woman. It is a way for me to say, I like people. A bit edgier and radical, I am reclaiming the word from its historically negative connotation.

Aaaah. Errrrr? What?

Okay Now I'm not even sure what I am!

 

[Saxton]

The quote in my signature is one that I'm very fond of and I really believe that any injustice brings us all down, if in no other way then just by not sticking up for fellow human beings simply because it's the right thing to do. I was upset by the stance the HRC took on ENDA – not pushing for the inclusion of transgendered people was wrong.


That being said, I truly believe that there was no intention to exclude anyone when the board was created. A long, long time ago (in a galaxy far, far away) a nice lesbian couple posted some questions about a trip to WDW with an equally nice gay couple that they were friends with. That simple post lead to a thread that went on for an extremely long time. That thread became so large that we received our own board. Gays & lesbians posted on that thread so I assume that the board title just sort of fell into place. There was no intention to exclude anyone (heck, we even let cool straight people post here!). Could the title have been more inclusive? Sure, and maybe the wise and wonderful Mods will come up with a creative new title. But no matter what I hope the OP (and anyone else that might be lurking) understands that everyone is welcome here.


And there's something else you should know ... happy hour is running late tonight but newbies always buy the first round!!

 

[Viki]

And there's something else you should know ... happy hour is running late tonight but newbies always buy the first round!!

Hey, friend, I'm having a nice little pinot noir!

 

[TuckandStuiesMom]

Hey, friend, I'm having a nice little pinot noir!

Make mine a teensy weensy lil glass of eiswein with a nice sized CHUNK of dark chocolate to go with.

 

[Viki]

Make mine a teensy weensy lil glass of eiswein with a nice sized CHUNK of dark chocolate to go with.

Yummy!

 

[Saxton]

Hey, friend, I'm having a nice little pinot noir!

Beer for me tonight. But only because with the kind of day I've had I knew that if I opened a bottle of wine I would finish it. With beer I can limit myself to one or two.

 

[Saxton]

Make mine a teensy weensy lil glass of eiswein with a nice sized CHUNK of dark chocolate to go with.

Stop by my house - I've got at least 4 bottles of icewine (from Canada and New York State, none from Germany) in my basement. (The bottles from Germany are all empty for some reason!)

 

[Timon-n-Pumbaa Fan]

I'll stick to Coke Zero tonight, but I would kill for some good fresh Oatmeal Raisin cookies right now.

 

[Viki]

I'll stick to Coke Zero tonight, but I would kill for some good fresh Oatmeal Raisin cookies right now.

Gwen says she's got some chocolate somewhere!

 

[RickinNYC]

Gang, I will ask that this particular thread stay the course, that jokes be left at the wayside (sorry Viks), and all manner of insults, whether passive/aggressive, direct or through word twisting, stop. I will also ask that those that are bickering over semantics, stop doing so.

I think the OP raised some interesting points, as did everyone else. Seems the majority feel that the wording "friends and family" covers all the bases but some disagree. From a mod perspective, I'd be interested in reading your true thoughts. If you feel that you might raise any ire because you feel things should stay the same, and you don't want to say so publically, please PM me and know your opinion will weigh equally.

This is NOT a guarantee that anything will be changed. It is a means to simply talk this out in a mature, adult like manner.

 

[Timon-n-Pumbaa Fan]

Can I propose that you mods privately discuss a few questions that could be asked in the form of a poll? Post the poll with private voting, and that would help to figure out the points of the issue(s) one by one. Then you could make whatever changes seem to be appropriate by majority vote. Just a though.

Another idea that came to me to clarify the inclusive status of whatever form this board takes, no matter what happens, could there be a board FAQ that spells it all out as to what the board function should be, who is welcome there, and that sort of thing? When I have moderated forums in the past, (Yes, folks, back in the day of Webtv, I was the owner of the most frequented Lesbian forum that was on the network) I found that it really helped to spell it all out for the folks that came by for a visit. I can see where an FAQ here, could have possibly stopped all of this long ago.

Edited to add:
Funny how the net has changed. In the group that I lead, we had no issues over inclusion of anyone bi, FTM, or MTF, that sought intimate relationships with women, but our biggest issue was the inclusion of posters under the age of 21.

 

[hematite153]

I think the OP raised some interesting points, as did everyone else. Seems the majority feel that the wording "friends and family" covers all the bases but some disagree.

Rick, this feeling struck me as wrong so I did a count of individuals who have replied within this thread and got:

10 people expressed a preference for a name change to something more inclusive.

5 people expressed a preference for the current name although this count includes 1 person who said that the tag line needed updating and includes all 3 moderators who have also said that they thought the issue warranted further discussion.

An additional 7 people have posted at some point without expressing a preference with regards to the board title.

So, I get a majority that thinks invisible_children07 brought up an important problem that we should listen to. Of course, I'm not privy to the pms that have been sent directly to the mods if people were afraid of flames, but, I wanted to correct the idea that the majority of posters thought that the title was okay.

 

[Cheshire Figment]

My BFF, Mike, and I were Best Man at each other's weddings. Since then Mike has had a MTF conversion including surgery and is now Michelle. His wife (they are still maried after more than 35 years) is definitely Bi but they are living apart (but separated a few years after the change).

And when Michelle and her girl friend come to visit WDW they are just another lesbian couple.

It all makes sense. At least her dughter says so, who a couple of years ago at Gay Day was wearing a T-Shirt that said "I love my two mommys".

 

[Timon-n-Pumbaa Fan]

I'm not a kid
stop calling me one
thanks

Tyler, if I call you a kid, it's because you are young enough, that you could have been my kid. I have worked with children for many years of my life. Some of the first of them are now your age, but were just tiny handfuls when we first met. It makes me feel very old sometimes to see that they are all grown up, and some of them have their own little ones now! Please believe me that if I call you a kid or kiddo, it's meant from a place of love and respect.

You are half my age and minus a few years on top of that. In my eyes, that is definately a kid.

 

[paigevz]

No kidding. One of my former 4 year old students came to see me the other day. She's a senior now. A grown, tall, confident child-woman. I was amazed. The oldest of my "children" are now in their mid-20s.

Um, on topic, yeah, I agree with Rick!

 

[OrlandoMike]

Tyler....

First of all, you are young. I know you feel all grown up, and what you did last summer added years to your development, but you are still young. It's not a slam, just a fact of life. We continue to learn new things till the day we die, and most of us have a few years of learning under our belts. It is refreshing though to see your spunk! You remind me of myself at your age! I too am new to the trans thing, and look forward to hearing more about it from you and others like you. Don't leave this board because of a disagreement. If you do I'll have to pay some poor Blue Devil good cash to give you a good whoopin!

As for the name change, lets look at a few things. Names for boards are like headlines, they need to be short and to the point. Look at DCI, no mention of Bugles or Guards, just Drums. Is that a correct title for the organization? No, but it's short and makes a nice logo. The same goes for our site, when people see the words "Gay and Lesbian" they know what we are. I'm assuming that's how you found us. Tons of other people who needed questions answered, or a friend, or a hug have found us this way also. If we start adding sub titles for everyone who posted over here the name of the board would be a paragraph long, and that wouldn't be good! The main name needs to be short, simple, and understandable. If we start using LGBT or other words the general public is not familiar with I feel we may loose some folks who need to come over here for help.

I have asked Rick and Viki for input, and we are looking at changing the name of the sub title.

It currently reads as follows....

This is a board for Gay and Lesbians, their family and friends to share information on their Disney Experiences

We are looking at changing it to this.......

This is a board for Gay, Lesbian, Bi and Transgender guests and their family and friends to share information on their Disney Experiences.

Tyler, you started this thread, what do you think?

What does everyone else think?

Now someone go get me a beer, and if you took that cash on the kitchen counter and ordered a pizza only to have a food fight there is gonna be some MAJOR trouble tomorrow morning!

 

[Timon-n-Pumbaa Fan]

If we are going to adjust the tag line, to be more inclusive, instead of tweaking the title, then I think we should add something along the lines of an acknowledgement of our CSP's.

This is a board for Gay, Lesbian, Bi, & Transgender guests, and their Straight, but not narrow minded friends and family to share information on their Disney Experiences.

This is a board for all members of the GLBTQ community, as well as, our open minded friends & family to share information on the Disney Experience.

I don't know, but I do feel that if we are going to spell it all out, we should make it clear that we are totally inclusive and welcome CSP's.

 

[rpmdfw]

This is a board for Gay, Lesbian, Bi and Transgender guests and their family and friends to share information on their Disney Experiences.
What does everyone else think?

Looks good to me, Mike!

And thanks to all three of our fantastic Mods for helping us navigate the choppy waters of this thread. You've all earned added respect in my book!

Rob

 

[invisible_children07]

I'm not marching this summer.

I don't appreciate being told I'm young. Or explained the 5000 reasons why it is totally okay to tell me that, to put me in a place and to have expectations placed upon me. It's not okay.

It takes 18+ years to loose the title and finally gain some respect and then about 2.5 seconds to forget that you (as a respectable adult who can now tell any youth what ever you please) had to go through all that to get any respect in the first place, or to even get listened to with a serious ear and I'm sick of it.

I don't appreciate the way i have been treated by ANY of the mods on this board. I have been ignored, had words put into my mouth, told I needed to stop antagonizing others, told I needed to play nice, been called young but at the same time act like an adult. I'm kind of glad I don't post on this DIS anymore if this is what it has come to. I don't know what has (if anything) been said to any of the other posters on this particular thread, but if it is anything like the treatment that I got, I am sorry you had to go through the same.

Please, please, please think before you speak to youth in the future. Too many of us just sit on our hands, hold our tounges, and say yes ma'am and no ma'am to people simply because they are adults. I'm out of here for good and hope maybe I have at least made some sort of an impact and raised the issues of adultism and bi/transphobia that is running rampant through our community.

As a last note. Remember folks, just because you can't see it, does not mean it's not there.

All the best
Tyler

P.s. I'll be in Disney in December if anyone wants to chat/hang out/etc.

 

[Timon-n-Pumbaa Fan]

As my father would say when I was storming off in a huff when things didn't go my way....

Don't let the door hit ya' where the good Lord split ya'!

You are going to do what you are going to do. If you are looking for me to beg you to stay, that's not going to happen. I think you are being a bit hasty in your retreat, but that's your choice.

As for being talked to by the mods, yes, I was talked to, but I am adult enough to know how to take the gentle direction that I was given.

Have a great life kiddo.

Edited to add....I think that it stinks that you start this debate/conversation and then you can't be bothered to respond to the offered compromise option.