I'm rather hesitant to reply to this thread, but I would like to offer information on special education law as needed. I am not a lawyer and am not offering services. Nor am I an advocate. I have seen due process cases from both sides of the table and have been involved in mediations. I also have classroom experience and am in the final throes of a doctoral degree in the area.
The Wrights law link is fantastic. I would encourage anyone with a child in special education to know their rights and this offers information that is fairly easy reading as well as accurate. I would also encourage you to find your state's regulations on special education. Likewise, I would encourage you to all read your state Parent's Right book that you should receive at least yearly. (I recall several parents with whom I used to work telling me that they were going to wallpaper with them. Please don't be those parents.) Finally, contact your state department of education and talk with someone in special services. Remember that state laws on education may differ substantially. Some states choose to barely meet the federal requirements while others go above and beyond what is required.
That being said, I think there's a bit of confusion of terms going on in this post. I would like to, at least, clarify those terms:
accommodations - delivered under IEPs and 504s; these allow students to progress towards goals identical to their peers but to show mastery in new ways or to receive certain changes to different areas (presentation, timing, etc.) Good examples of an accommodation would be having a test read, using a pictorial schedule, using a calculator, receiving extra time, etc. A good way to remember these is that a student is still held to the same standard but just shows knowledge of that standard in a new way. In other words, if a teacher is measuring reading fluency, she wouldn't read the passage to the student (this is a modification). However, if she were measuring comprehension she could read the passage to the student.
modifications - delivered under IEPs; these make changes, typically lower, to expectations and/or standards of other students. Modifications are typically not necessary with high functioning students. These include limiting the number of answers on a test, lowering the number of math problems a student has to complete, etc.
These two terms are often confused. For those of you with children in schools, here are a couple of resources:
http://www.specialconnections.ku.edu/cgi-bin/cgiwrap/specconn/main.php?cat=instruction§ion=main
http://iris.peabody.vanderbilt.edu/ - click on resources
Both of these sites give some great information about various strategies as well as information on accommodations and modifications.
From my past experience, my students with Asperger's were high functioning and did not require any modifications. We stuck to accommodations and, in some cases, used a one-on-one para. The students also had behavior intervention plans to assist in preventing 'melt-downs' and we had incorporated what I called 'triage' points throughout the day. (These triage points were based on a bit of data collection on their past behaviors. Some students needed a triage first thing in the morning, after lunch, and before they went home. Others only needed one a few days a week. Again, depends on the kiddo.) We also used focus rooms to help students begin to recognize when their behaviors were getting out of control and go to a safe spot for processing (this was in high school).
Law-wise, I would also like to clarify a couple of things:
IDEA 2004 has basically aligned the expectations with NCLB. That was its sole purpose. All districts are required to test
all students using typical assessments (with or without accommodations), out of level assessments (for students performing below grade level), or alternate assessment (for students with "significant cognitive disabilities" - words not mine). Alternate assessment is reserved for only 2% of a school's population and is typically used with individuals with significant intellectual disabilities.
Where it starts to get sticky on assessment has to do with the accommodations detailed in the IEP (parents are equal members of the IEP team) and the validity of assessments. Some states, for instance, don't allow reading tests to be read since the testing manufacturers indicate that it violates the validity of the test. In many situations, students with Asperger's are not academically below grade level so the other two tests are not a valid measure either. Thus, when school personnel tell you that an accommodation may not be allowable on a particular assessment, they may just be making you aware. It's also worthy to note that these decisions are out of a district's hands and are decided by the state education agency (i.e. don't shoot the messenger).
Also understand that putting a student with special needs in a private school does not guarantee that a district will necessarily have to pay for it. In order for the school to be held liable for that tuition, you'll need to show that a comparable (this does not mean same) program was not available in that district and that the program the district offered was at least 'tried'. Sometimes a district may not pursue due process in this regards, but they are increasingly doing so with the some of the recent supreme court decisions and with rising costs associated with private school placement.
Finally, FAPE and LRE are two often confused words. Free, appropriate public education does not equal 'best'. It does mean that a student will be provided services that are appropriate for their needs. Least restrictive environment does not always equal complete inclusion either. It simply means that a student's needs will be taken into account when considering their placement along the service continuum (self-contained private setting all the way up to fully included in a public school). While full inclusion is certainly desirable, particularly when considering their future post-school environments, it may not be a suitable placement for all students. The IEP team (remember, this includes parents as an equal member) must consider the needs of the student when deciding on their placement.
I hope some of this helps. I would ask that those who are itching at flaming try to temper their remarks. If you feel something was explained in error, feel free to correct but I would ask that you cite your resources and I'll happily share mine - right down to the section of the law, if needed. If you would like further clarification of those sources or the actual citation to the law, feel free to ask too!
PS Since someone also posted that they refused to sign the IEP until it was exactly how they wanted it. The only times that signatures are needed is the consent for evaluation and initial placement. The IEP document signature page, following initial placement, is merely a recording of individuals who took part in the IEP. If you have a disagreement with the IEP, it is best to provide that specific information in a separate document attached to the IEP - provided that the district chooses not to adapt the IEP according to your input. Withholding a signature really has no effect. However, having a document detailing your disagreement with certain portions of the IEP can definitely detail a lack of collaboration.