# Marrieds choosing not to have kids



## Krissalee

I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).

DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."

I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.

My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
"No, we are not having children"
"No, we are not planning on having children."
"We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
"We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
"We choose not to have chidren."
"We choose to be child-free."
"We choose not to be parents."
"We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"

People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?

It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.

Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!


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## ChisJo

Although I am not married, I already know that I am not going to have children. I know that I am too selfish have them. I enjoy MY time and MY freedom. I cannot see me pregnant - it would hamper my lifestyle. I enjoy travelling and spontaneity and my own money. I am an aunt with 8 neices and nephews, and spending time with them is seriously my form of birth control. I have 2 cats, that I can leave for hours at a time, with food and water, and they are happy. They are even happier when I get home. They never cry at 3am and they don't interrupt my sleep. They love sleeping at my feet. I change their litter once a week, not 8 times a day.
Please don't get me wrong - I love children, just not the lifestyle of a parent. I have a job that will allow me to travel the world, and that is exactly what I plan on doing. In doing so, I plan on seeing what the world has to offer. This would not make sense if a child was in the picture. I have met someone in the same profession who wants to do the same.
Additionally, in my experiences with my closest friends who have children, I cannot see me settling down like that. I don't see it as a happy time. It puts strain on their marriages, their finances and their personal freedom. Call me selfish, but it's my choice. 
As for what others say to you, they don't realize how rude they are being. What if you were unable to have children, but really wanted them? How would they feel then, asking you those same questions? Is it our duty to populate an already over-populated world? I just don't understand why others need to impose in our business and our desire to want and not to want children. 
If people ask me why I don't want/have children, I just tell them that it is my/our personal business. If they persist, ask them a personal question that you know they don't want to ask, just to get the message across. Asking someone about their lifestyle choice is very rude, and in doing so, cross a boundary they shouldn't cross in the first place. I know it gets to be annoying, I go through it too. I just tell people to back off, or the conversation and visit is over. But, I am quite assertive.
Good luck,
Jo


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## PhotobearSam

SAME HERE...

DH got "fixed" before we even got married as we don't want kids...It was my B-day present...LOL  


Why can't people just respect the decision???

We are celebrating 7 years together on the 19th of November and 3 years married and we still get the question.

At least when I told my Mom what DH did, she was happy for me. She said you will live your life as you see fit and that is great...I love my Mom.

Krissalee, it won't stop but I like to say "No kids for us, we like having money for trips" and "I don't need to have children, I just married one!"

These work for me but if you come up with a new one, send it my way.


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## PhotobearSam

P.S.

What are you guys doing on the last night of your trip? Maybe we could get together for a drink or something on the 28th? That is our first night and we won't have park tickets but maybe we can meet up...


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## TDC Nala

How about "it's none of your business?"


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## thelionqueen

Everything you said fit me to a tee 10 years ago!
I feel as if I am a very selfish person...nothing wrong with that I think    I work for what I want, go where I want and do what I want to do which is everyone's right IMHO.

In 1996, I unexpectedly got pregnant...truly unexpectedly, you might call it a miracle since I had NUMEROUS "options" in effect to make sure this didn't happen.  

Being Spanish & Sicilian (and obviously Catholic) termination of pregnancy is not an option in any way, therefore, Voila..I started telling everyone I was going to have a baby (out of wedlock no less..but that only lasted 45 days  )

Everyone was COMPLETELY shocked!!!  I had NEVER even held a baby, NEVER been around one and ABSOLUTELY didn't consider myself the mothering type, but, here I was.

Anyway, long story short, I am a wonderful mother of 2 and it is what I was meant to be.  I absolutely could NEVER imagine my life without them.  Honestly, as I write this, I barely remember life before them, it was so empty with things that meant nothing when I thought they were everything.  But that is just me.

My 2 cents worth, if it bothers you when people ask, just say whatever you think you are entitled to not have children and it's no ones business whatever you choose.  My little sidenote is, I believe the reason people keep asking is because having children is so completely wonderful, they "expect" other's would want them.  

Hopefully trying to "ride the fence" on this issue, I understand both sides.. In any event, enjoy your upcoming vacation!!!


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## justplaingoofy

We to, have decided not to have any.  Don't have anything against them, we just like doing what we want, when we want. (sounds like we're a little selfish I guess).
When people ask, I just give them the old Pheobe saying from Friends (the one when someone asked her to go someplace she didnt want to go)

"I wish I could, but I really don't want to"


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## TDC Nala

> I believe the reason people keep asking is because having children is so completely wonderful, they "expect" other's would want them.



Gosh, thanks. "Here's the fabulous thing you're missing. We don't understand why anyone would forego anything so fabulous and live an empty life, therefore we have to probe into your life and psyche because we don't get it."

Still none of their business.


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## tggrbuny

I hope you don't mind me saying this, but the problem might be due to your answers.  Every response that you listed is informational.

We wanted kids, thirteen miscarriages later, it is not going to happen.  I don't want to discuss my fertillity with everyone.  So when I am asked if I have any kids, I simply say no and then ask a question of them to change the subject.  Rarely does anyone push it, and if they do I tell them it wasn't an option.  I don't tell them why and I have a stern look on my face that would be hard to mistake for anything but drop the subject. 

You are telling them you made a choice, therefore giving them the chance to respond.

You have made a lifestyle choice that others should respect, since they won't respect it, don't invite comment.

In the long run the questions stop anyway, were our in our 40s and not as many people ask any more.

Of course this advise doesn't not work for relatives    

Before anyone flames me with adoption/foster options, health prevented that choice.(stern look on my face that indicates I don't want to talk about it  )


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## thelionqueen

TDC Nala said:
			
		

> Gosh, thanks. "Here's the fabulous thing you're missing. We don't understand why anyone would forego anything so fabulous and live an empty life, therefore we have to probe into your life and psyche because we don't get it."
> 
> Still none of their business.



If you're going to quote someone, you might want to read and quote the entire sentence at least....what I wrote is...

"you are entitled to not have children and it's no ones business whatever you choose. _My little sidenote is, I believe the reason people keep asking is because having children is so completely wonderful, they "expect" other's would want them."_
Not trying to flame, just believe you took my comment out of context.


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## FayeW

Ann Landers always said that when someone askes a nosy, personal question you should just smile quizzically and say "Why do you ask?", or, if you particularily want to get your point across you could amend it to "That is a very personal question, why do you ask?"  Really puts the asker on the spot. Obviously, a generic "Do you have children?" wouldn't deserve that response, but I do like the previous suggestion of replying "No, that it isn't an option". They don't need to know that it isn't an option because you choose for it to not be an option.


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## TDC Nala

thelionqueen, I was replying to your side note, not the rest of your sentence. I understand those who believe they have a wonderful thing going. No matter how wonderful they think it is, they have no business asking anyone else why they wouldn't want the same thing.



> I do like the previous suggestion of replying "No, that it isn't an option".



"No" should be enough. Personal explanations aren't required.


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## DisneyPhD

1st, I am not arugeing with  your choice, but it sounds like most of the answer given at based in self centernedness and imaturiety. (I like doing what I want, I still am kid or married to one, I don't want to give up my currenlty lifestyle for chidlren, I like being able to what I want and not have to think about kids or be resonsible for them........)  All very good reasons not to have kids.  Really so many people are parents who shouldn't be.  Taking steps to make sure you don't have kids if you don't want them is a mature thing to do.  To many people the answer you are giving are interepted as "We are not ready yet."  So they ask again to see if are later.   

However most of these feelings are ones people often outgrow and mature past.  Many people who are now parents once felt that way, and now can't even remember it or why they thought it was an atractive lifestyle.  While parenthood is difficult and very much a labor of love, it has so many bennfits and joys aren't based on what you want as a person, but what you want for your children.  (A good example is your mom PhotobearSam who is happy for you, not the grand kids she won't have.)  

Many a person has felt the way you do, and down the line changed their mind as they grew.  My older brother and his wife lead the "yuppie lifestyle" for 20 years and now are desperetly trying ever procudcture known to get pregnant.  They currenlty are, after 100,000 pregnant and hope with every breath and prayer to stay that way until a healty baby is born.  She is really scared she waited too long.  

Sorry I have more thoughts on this (as a mom and a clincial thearpsit, who can't spell!   ) but I have to go attened to my screaming baby.  

All in all I agree with tggrbuny, too much info.  Just say you don't plan to have kids.


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## TDC Nala

> To many people the answer you are giving are interepted as "We are not ready yet." So they ask again to see if are later.



They should not be asking AT ALL. Other than close family members, what business is it of anyone whether a couple is ready to have children or not?


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## DisneyPhD

Ok, nursed cranky baby and put her down for nap.  I have more time to finish my thoughts. 

Krissalee, I was married at age 22 we always knew we anted kids, but Ihad my 1st daughter the week after I turned 30 years old.  We had 8 years to enjoy a lifestyle of just hubby and I and I don't disrespect your decsion to continue that.  We both enjoyed out time when it was just us and I am really glad we had that.     If we never had kids I would still be happy in our marriage.  Many people have kids for the wrong reason, to fix something in themsevels or their current life.  

Also the standard list of reasons an adult doesn't want kids often sounds like you are trying to convince yourself along with others why you dont' want them.  

I have many friends who are going through the same struggle right now (not just with family, but trying to decide among themselves if they do want to ever.)  32 is just the age for that. 

As a mom I do tend to agree with thelionqueen, once you expernce parenthood do you rather expect others to want to have the same feelings.  Many people love parenthood so much and it changed them so much they are suprized when others don't want the same experinces.


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## eeyore74

People have mostly stopped asking me, thankfully, but I would always try to think of weird answers.  Complaining about my horrible periods and kidney stones worked well.  I also would just give them "the look" and turn to talk to somebody else.

I don't want kids and I'm mature enough to know that this is what's for me.  Too many friends have had kids because it's expected.  They don't care about their kids and that's sadder than anything.  

To parents who love their kids and enjoy them - that's great!  Wish there were more of you.


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## lookingforward

I have three children and appreciate all of the wonderful moments as well as the sacrifices and pain that comes along with parenthood. I am also a social worker and can understand that some people do not want children at all. I think it takes a brave person to admit that children are not on their agenda and then embrace that. Society tends to expect babies from couples but it is clearly not the right decision for some. Having children is full time, gritty, wonderful, dirty, exhausting, exhilerating, work. I have not slept through the night since 1990 (when my first child was born). I worry about the things I do and don't do for my kids. I worry about their health, their happiness, their futures. To me, it is the best and most complicated thing I have ever done. To someone else, it might be maddening. I have seen people struggle with being unhappy parents and once that decision is made it it lifelong. So to those who just "know" that they don't want kids, consider yourselves lucky to have such forethought. At work, I deal with many parents who were not insightful enough to realize that. Enjoy and revel in your decision, life is too short to worry about what other people think about your choices.

Oh, I agree with the person who suggested the line "It is none of your business" That is quick and to the point!


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## macs4us

I have been with my husband for just over 11 years, married 6 years. We had my kitty Nicky until she passed away at the age of 13 Christmas Day in 1999 (she stayed with us to see us married). I missed her so much, and people were putting the "baby" pressure on me (you aren't getting any younger - you will be 30 soon) I decided I wanted to have a baby. I started buying baby stuff, getting books, etc. After 2 years and no baby, I rescued 3 kitties - no more baby urge. I kept all that baby stuff in trunks in my garage - tags still on. When Katrina hit, I donated all of it. The total came to over $5000 in baby stuff    - yikes!!! But, it went to help other people, so it was meant to be. When people ask me about kids, I tell them I already help raise my nieces and nephews, so I'm good (my sisters are 10 years older than I am). Sometimes I tell people with all the problems this planet has with overpopulation, we are being socially responsible by not having children. That usually shuts them up.


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## LuluLovesDisney

TDC Nala said:
			
		

> They should not be asking AT ALL. Other than close family members, what business is it of anyone whether a couple is ready to have children or not?



Personally, I am not sure whether or not I want to have children yet- I have been discussing it with my boyfriend- that it may not be the right decision for me, but I'm still on the fence, however, this sentence made me think-

increasingly, more and more people- family included, think *everything* is their business. I have heard comments on my weight, religion, finances, etc. from family, friends and acquaintances that I have thought were truly none of their business. Whether it's choosing not to have children, or any of these other personal matters, we really shouldn't have to think of creative ways of explaining our circumstances or choices, but we all do. If I say "it's none of your business" then I am thought of as the rude one. It's not right, IMHO. 

I'm not married, I'm 25, so relatively young, and last year, my class (I'm a teacher) asked me why I didn't have kids. They were so shocked by this- many of them have young moms with multiple kids, often from multiple men, so they kind of just assume it's what happens. I felt very put on the spot here, so I can imagine what it's like for the rest of you. 

All I can say is that I have great respect for people who do what they know is right for them no matter what others say- and I wish the world were more supportive.


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## Meezers

I totally understand this issue.  When I was married I got asked this question all the time.  Tried to answer politely but finally started saying "My husband kicks the cat....he calls me stupid all the time...what would he do to a child?".

My Mother also gets the whole pity thing cause she doesn't have grandchildren.  She tells people she is very glad that she has children who didn't let society pressure "make" them have children...she is quite happy with "grandpets"!

One other thing....some women are not able to concieve or carry children....so why don't some people think that the answers given might be very painful and emotional before they ask the question...which is really none of their business anyways.


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## DisneyPhD

lookingforward said:
			
		

> I have three children and appreciate all of the wonderful moments as well as the sacrifices and pain that comes along with parenthood. I am also a social worker and can understand that some people do not want children at all. I think it takes a brave person to admit that children are not on their agenda and then embrace that. Society tends to expect babies from couples but it is clearly not the right decision for some. Having children is full time, gritty, wonderful, dirty, exhausting, exhilerating, work. I have not slept through the night since 1990 (when my first child was born). I worry about the things I do and don't do for my kids. I worry about their health, their happiness, their futures. To me, it is the best and most complicated thing I have ever done. To someone else, it might be maddening. I have seen people struggle with being unhappy parents and once that decision is made it it lifelong. So to those who just "know" that they don't want kids, consider yourselves lucky to have such forethought. At work, I deal with many parents who were not insightful enough to realize that. Enjoy and revel in your decision, life is too short to worry about what other people think about your choices.
> 
> Oh, I agree with the person who suggested the line "It is none of your business" That is quick and to the point!




I would have to agree with lookingforward, I too have seen many of people who really shouldn't became parent do so, with out good results (and sometimes with good results, many people will say becomeing a parent forced them to grow up when they never would of otherwise.)  Also people trying to great pregnant when they aren't married or commited to the other parent, with no regards to how this will effect the child and their future.  

So you know, once you have your 1st kid, it doesn't stop.  It seems like right after you get home from the hosptial people are asking you when and if you are going to have more.  Just like reasons not to have kids often come across os selfish, so does reasons not to have more.  

I also think that many people with kids feel it is a lot like talking to say a 2nd grade boy who want's to know why anyone would ever want to kiss a girl, yuck.  And you know right now that is just how they feel, but you know feelings can change as you do.  (This is not true for all people, as you know not everyone wants kids, not every boy grows up to be want to kiss girls either!) 

My best friend never thought she would get married.  She did last month. Now at 32 she and her new husband are dealing with the mater if they ever want kids in the future.  It is very possible she will not be able to get pregnant, but adoptions is something they are both willing to consider, IF they want kids.  As my life gets more consumed by my children I must admit it makes our friendship harder, our days are full of very differnt things.  Many couples find it hard when their friends start to have children and they don't.  (and vice versa.)


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## MomofKatie

IMO, I think it all boils down to human nature.  People are curious of anything that is different from their life experience.  They question you because to them, you are "different", and why don't you want to do things like them?

DH and I were married 7 years before having DD, and we got questions all the time from friends, family, and strangers.  "When are you going to have kids?",  "Why don't you have kids yet?" and on and on.

Then, when we had DD, we started hearing the next question- "When are you going to have another?", or "Why don't you want another?" or "Don't you think your DD will be missing out without siblings?".  Arrgh! BTW, DD is an only and perfectly happy about it- so are we.

My DB and DSIL have 3 kids, and they get questions like "Why did you have 3?  You already had a girl and a boy- wasn't that enough?"

No matter what you decide, there will always be those who think your choice is wrong, and their way is best.  Just keep your answers short, to the point, and change the subject.  As TDCNala said it best, "None of your business".


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## Jack Splat

Krissalee, trust me, I feel your pain.  I'm 33 and although I'm not married and haven't been yet, I too do not want kids, never have, never will.  Despite not being married, I commonly get the same kind of questions you do, and like you, nobody seems satisfied with my answers which are similar/same as yours.  I frankly find it disgusting that others can't respect the desires and views of those who choose not to have kids.  It's just as easy, if not easier, to be judgmental and critical of those who do have kids, but yet, I naturally refrain, so it surely sucks that that respect is not reciprocated.


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## lookingforward

For another perspective, my first two children are boys. I did not have the third child until my boys were 6 and 8. For YEARS I would hear "are you going to try for a girl?????" Like somehow my family was incomplete without a girl.  Tyring for a third child was a big decision and once we decided to try I lost a little boy in the second trimester and within weeks I got the "question" again. Once I got pregnant again (forth time) there was a USMC spouse I met at a pregnancy class we were "forced" to take even after having had kids. She and I were by far the oldest moms to be in the class. When I lost the baby she sent me a card. A few months later I saw her at the grocery store. She was VERY pregnant and I had just learned that I was pregnant again. She said (and I am not kidding) "You sure don't quit, do you?". I was speechless....for a moment..then I told her she should take a sensitivity class because she had none. Shut her up. By the way, that pregnancy was a success and SHE turns 7 in December. (I don't get the "are you going to have anymore" question now becuase, quite frankly, I am getting too old! : confused3 )

Good luck and much happiness to each and every one of you no matter what you desire!


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## LiLIrishChick63

i think it's smart that you choose not to have kids. you know you don't want them, so if you had them you would be unhappy. some people are just not meant to have kids/be parents and i think it's perfectly fine! don't worry about what other people say, it's not their lives! i think your answers are perfectly fine! and if they have more to say about it just say "it's our lives and this is what we choose and this is what makes us happy." good luck!


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## mhf

"We'll have children when we're ready but in the mean time, we practice a lot!"    

I know, that's a rude answer but the question is too.

I, for one, will never be ready and neither will DH.  We had the baby discussion before we married.

Married almost 20 years and headed to WDW for DH's 40th b-day!   

MHF aw:  aw:  aw

PS to the ladies with children:  In my humble opinion, it's just as rude to ask you if you'll have another or was this child planned.


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## WillCAD

Being a single guy, I don't get the kids question, but I cannot count the number of times I get asked "Do you have a girlfriend?" When I say no, almost everybody asks, "Why not?"

Nunya damn business, that's why.

I can understand and appreciate the idle curiosity that motivates people to ask me if I am seeing anybody, but if I'm not, my motivations for such are nobody's business but my own, unless I choose to share them with somebody.

I don't mind telling people, however, that I can't imagine myself as a father. I love kids, and I'm actually very good with kids, but  having spent my entire life helping to care for my brother, cousins, and later thier kids, I am parented out. My patience is shot. If I'm ever lucky enough to find a woman with the angelic patience to actually mary me, I won't want any kids of my own.

Hehe, scared the heck out of my brother's wife the first time I held my neice, though - big, goofy-looking oaf like me holding her newborn. My mother saw the expression on her face and laughed, "Don't worry, he knows how to hold a baby just fine!"


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## dixiegirl

I am right there with you and completely understand.  Dh is 42 and I am 35 - we have been married for 9 years now and everyone asks us about the children issue.  I used to be very polite about my answers.  Now - I just tell it like it is - don't want children, not having any - period.  I do like the one suggestion though - just answer them with a question, "Why do you ask?"  I am definitely gonna try that to see what answers I get.  DH and I knew years before we were married that we did not want to have any children.  Don't mind children - just prefer to not have any of our own.  We have our kitty cat and she is enough for me.


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## SparklieSunShine

I don't think that not having children for any reason should be percieved as selfishness. In contrast I think making the decision that children are not for you is one of the most unselfish things that a person can do. I admire people who realise that raising a child is not for them and then stick to their plan.

Raising a child is hard work that lasts a life-time. I believe that if you doubt for a moment your want to have a child then you should wait a while. This is a hard world to live in and children should be wanted and nurtured. People who have children for the wrong reasons make me weary.

I admire those who choose not to have children. 

As for me I would like to have children, but I don't know about conciously bringing one into our world. I would much rather adopt, but sadly that is very expensive. We shall see when the time comes.

Just my opinions.


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## allaboutmm

lookingforward said:
			
		

> I have three children and appreciate all of the wonderful moments as well as the sacrifices and pain that comes along with parenthood. I am also a social worker and can understand that some people do not want children at all. I think it takes a brave person to admit that children are not on their agenda and then embrace that. Society tends to expect babies from couples but it is clearly not the right decision for some. Having children is full time, gritty, wonderful, dirty, exhausting, exhilerating, work. I have not slept through the night since 1990 (when my first child was born). I worry about the things I do and don't do for my kids. I worry about their health, their happiness, their futures. To me, it is the best and most complicated thing I have ever done. To someone else, it might be maddening. I have seen people struggle with being unhappy parents and once that decision is made it it lifelong. So to those who just "know" that they don't want kids, consider yourselves lucky to have such forethought. At work, I deal with many parents who were not insightful enough to realize that. Enjoy and revel in your decision, life is too short to worry about what other people think about your choices.
> 
> Oh, I agree with the person who suggested the line "It is none of your business" That is quick and to the point!


I couldn't have said it better myself!!! Great reply!


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## NeverlandClub23

My fiance is 29 and I'm 23, we're getting married in about a year and neither of us wants to have kids. I never have wanted to have kids. I don't like to babysit or really be around a lot of kids. I love our lives how they are and I look forward to so much for our future and kids are no where in that picture. I get annoyed too when everyone says "Oh! You'll change your minds! Kids are the greatest blessings!" or "How could you not share your life with the angelic joy of a child?" (Side note: What?!?! There's nothing "angelic" about any of the kids I've ever been around   ) But besides that even if I had the greatest kid (and every parent thinks they have the greatest kid) it's just not what I want or need in life.  That's just my opinion and how I want to live my life. I don't go up to a person I know with 5 kids and say "Oh! Why in the world would you want to have 5 of those?"   so hopefully one day the questions will stop but if they don't oh well, it won't change how I feel.


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## J.Cooper

Love this thread!! 

I've been married for almost 11 years. DH & I are in our mid 30's and we get asked all questions & comments all the time. Oh your selfish, you'll change your mind, whose gonna take care of you when your old, (blah, blah)..  Lately my cousins are having kids and bugging us too. Sometimes I think they look at our childfree life and get envious. Once you have the baby, there's no "refunds". I'm proud to tell people who ask, I don't want kids. If they say I'm selfish, I just reply 100%! They are not gonna change my mind. 

I feel people just don't respect our decision to be childfree. We decided before we got married that kids weren't on the agenda.  We *LOVE * our freedom and childfree lifestyle. We get to travel when we want, especially going to Disney during off season   . People are normally shocked when I tell them I don't want kids. We love kids and DH has plenty of nieces & nephews and we get to enjoy them; then send them back home to mommy & daddy  . I'd rather be auntie than mommy. This works best for us.


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## DeeDeeDis

We have three very sweet sons who are growing into very nice young men.  We were bless in that we must have done one or two things right in bringing them up (we're not quite sure what).  They continue to be a great joy in our lives.

That said i will add that GOOD FOR YOU, if you dont want kids, dont have them.  This is NO ONES business, be they close friends, family or complete strangers.  You are the only one who must wake up every day with the choices you make so you have to do what is right for YOU.

When people ask just say NO.  No explaination is needed or required.  If they continue tell them that you have already answered that question, if they continue to impose their beliefs on you then just leave.  you dont need to be rude if its family or friends just give them a hug and say goodbye - if u do this everytime they start, perhaps they would get the point that this is a closed subject.

Congrads for knowing what you want or in this case, don't want


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## ChisJo

J.Cooper said:
			
		

> Oh your selfish, you'll change your mind, whose gonna take care of you when your old, (blah, blah)..



Oh yes....The famous guilt trip. I think we've all heard this one before. 

And by the way...How are you selfish for choosing not to have kids? This one always baffles me...

My best friend of many years, is actually terrified of children (I think hate would be a better word, but I don't think that is very nice). I don't know how she made it through her own childhood. She can't even be in the same room as children. We went to WDW last year together, and truthfully, she was having panic attacks in the parks. She just couldn't handle the amount of children around (it was my idea, by the way, to go to WDW - not hers!). Can you believe that people, friends of ours, still ask her, knowing her fear of children, when her and her husband are going to have children? It seriously blows my mind - she has been adement since before I can remember, that she was never going to have children. She doesn't keep that a secret either. She seriously has a list of the top 250 reasons why she shouldn't have kids - a written list. If you think I'm kidding, I'm not. The only reason she wants children is to have a baby shower and get free things. I think in her case, it would be more selfish to have the baby then to not. 
We always joke that we are going to be the cat ladies when we're both 80 - 10 years we've been saying that and we still mean it.

Jo


----------



## VSL

I don't think it's selfish either way.

I just think it's rude that people (family members included) think that they have the right to ask such personal questions.


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## Krissalee

Thanks for all your replies.  My family is aware that I don't want children, and they are fine with that - totally accepting - good thing I have 2 sisters that want kids!  LOL!

I appreciate your responses of being more firm, and I plan to.  Most of my questions come from co-workers, and I really can be more firm in my answers than I have before!


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## dutchess 1968

In my opinion you are two very very smart people.
There is nothing wrong with deciding not to have children.  
I love my daughter dearly, BUT did it change my life..yes.
Do I have many sleepless nights wondering what the world is going to do to her, that I can not control...yes.
Do I worry about her every hour of the day that she is not with me...yes.
 
Believe me my biological clock wasn't ticking when I had my daughter..it was a complete surpise.  I was told my whole life I would never accomplish such a feat.  Hence, the earth crushing moment when my husband and I were told..you are expecting a child.  (We were together 10 years).
 
An honest thought here...I never wanted children because I knew how much work they truly are.  I am selfish and I knew what a responsbility they were..(trust me...how right I was on that assumption)that is the major reason I did not want any.  She is here now, and you deal...its not like you can send them back once they are here.
   So..good for you to realize that  your relationship is what is important  before a child shows up and fights begin over who gives up what.
 
You don't need children to enjoy Disney.
Just my thoughts..
I am sure hate mail will follow this post because I was so honest.


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## donald...really

No kids. No desire. No interest. No explanations. No apologies. No one ones business.

Just two wonderful dogs.


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## PrincessKitty

DH and I are both 50ish, have been together over 19 years, and are childfree (childless by choice). I love kids, and I'm a pediatric RN, but I never wanted to have kids.  I had a friend in high school who was a foster child, and I've always felt I could foster or adopt if wanted children, so the option doesn't end with the end of fertility.

With my years of pediatric nursing experience, I must say there are MANY, MANY people who are not happy parents.  Unfortunately, parenthood is the "default" in our society.  You are not selfish for thinking through your choices carefully--the most selfish thing in the world is to give birth to children who are not particularly wanted.

I have also worked in geriatrics, and it is a fallacy to think that kids take care of their parents in old age.  Some kids do (I cared for my mom and dad for a year, and my brother has had my mom for 3 years--our other 3 siblings will not have any part in caregiving), but many do not.  People should not pop out kids with the idea that their children will care for them in their old age!

The one thing that is true about not having children is that you will be out of step with the majority of people your age.  However, if you live in a big city or a college town, I think you will find this to be less of a problem.  Personally, I don't NECESSARILY have a lot else in common with childfree folks--my closest friends all have children. 

Have a fun life and don't worry about the questions people ask you--they are mostly just curious about you not choosing the "default."


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## PrincessKitty

P.S.  A woman I used to work with, upon learning that DH and I had been together for several years without kids, said "WELL DON'T HAVE ANY."  She and her DH had been together 10 years and had a child because "it seemed like what we were supposed to do next."  She truly regretted having a child.  Very few people can be that honest!


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## DisneyPhD

donald...really said:
			
		

> No kids. No desire. No interest. No explanations. No apologies. No one ones business.
> 
> Just two wonderful dogs.




I have noticed that many people who don't have kids do have a pet they love very much.  I guess everyone does need someone to love, care for, cuddle with and think you are best.   

I remember reading a newspaper article about a single actress that adopted a kid.  Her friend said "she needed someone to love and cuddle after a long day at work."  HELLO, get a dog!!!!!!!! that isn't why you have kids!    (better yet 2 dogs so they have someone else to play with when you are at work.)  You don't have to start a college fund for dogs either. 

I think PrincessKitty has a very good point about being out of step with others your age that are starting familys.  I remember feeling like a was joining a specail "club" when I was pregnant.  There is a bound between parents I think (knowing how difficult it is.)  I have also noticed that many people who do like kids are not parents have kids in their life one way or another: teacher, work (nurse, socialworker, therapsit etc...) nieces, newphews, children of friends etc....  This fills up their desire to have kids.  When I used to teach preschool, or be a therapist with speical needs kids that was all the brith control motovation I needed.  I got past it though when DH and I were ready to start a family.


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## CleveRocks

I'm a happy (and exhausted, and cash-strapped) 38 year old father of a kindergartener boy and a pre-schooler girl.  My wife and I married when I was 24 and she was 22, I was just finishing grad school and she was about to start med school.  We were married for almost 9 years before our son was born (by choice).  During those 9 years, we lived in three different states, traveled a lot, SLEPT a lot, and endured all the questions about when we're having kids.

To the OP, try to ignore the social misfits who ask you such rude questions, or just answer with a simple "No."  Don't feel compelled to give them an answer to THEIR satisfaction, because that will be impossible in most cases.  *Don't seek their approval because you will probably never get it.*  They will have their opinions about what you should do, but you and your spouse are the only ones who get to decide.  All that matters is that the two of you are doing what the two of you want to do.  No one else matters.  

But since we're talking, I have a question ... CAN YOU BABYSIT SATURDAY NIGHT???  WE NEVER GET OUT ANYMORE!!!

-- Eric


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## liquid

I've been married 18 years, had 5 children, lost one to cancer.  I'm not the nurturing "type" and no, one doesn't always change the minute one has a child! Still, I believe that my children are a gift from God and that motherhood is my vocation.

That said, I think it's awful that anyone would pressure any of you for a reason, or argue with you about the validity of your decision. Some people are just plain rude! 

A thought - if you tell a person like this that you're too selfish to be a parent (or that you'd rather sleep or spend your money on yourself or anything like that), it will make them feel superior and make them feel justified in continuing! I think the *stern look* or the *none of your business* reply will shut them up faster!


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## Piglet4Ever

DH and I have been married 9 yrs.  I am 33 he is 37, and we are not having any kids.  We love our life the way it is, Dh is Navy and we move every three years, it is hard enough getting the two of us from place to place, I give props to all the families with kids that do it,  but we don't want to!      We have four nephews and 2 nieces at the moment so we are not lacking for children to love and spoil, and the best part is we can always come back to our nice calm house after a visit.  Dh and and I always say we were meant to be the coolest Aunt and Uncle in the world!  I am lucky my mom has never made me feel bad about our choice, my grandma's used to talk about it all the time, but now I think they get the hint that we aren't having kids.  I am sure my DH's parents would love if we had kids, but they don't say anything to us about it anymore either, which I appreciate.  To each his own, presonally we love our life the way it is with just the two of us!!!!!


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## Aliki

mhf said:
			
		

> "We'll have children when we're ready but in the mean time, we practice a lot!"
> 
> I know, that's a rude answer but the question is too.




Thanks for the tip-- this is a line I'll most definitely use.


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## TDC Nala

> I have noticed that many people who don't have kids do have a pet they love very much. I guess everyone does need someone to love, care for, cuddle with and think you are best



Nope. I work too much to take care of animals. I have two plants. One looks dead, though.


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## c&ldisneylovers

[/QUOTE]  When I used to teach preschool, or be a therapist with speical needs kids that was all the brith control motovation I needed.[/QUOTE]

I am a special education teacher (resource/behavior room) and feel the same way. I love my kids but can't imagine my life if I had to go home to some of the students I work with and parent them. I imagine that one day I will have kids (I'm only 26 and have lots of time) but NO time in the near future. My job is enough BC for me


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## hucifer

TDC Nala said:
			
		

> Nope. I work too much to take care of animals. I have two plants. One looks dead, though.


Okay, that was funny.

NOT childless by choice.  DH and I have been trying for 6 years.  So we get the rude comments and questions too and I can't stand them.

I was in the beauty salon a few weeks ago in the waiting room.  A new mom and dad were there with their infant.  The baby started fussing and the new dad awkwardly picked her up and cradled her in his arms, but she still fussed.  So the mom picked her up and held her upright, against her chest.  The baby curled up her legs, obviously content with this position and being "chest to chest" with the mom, so it started making these unbelievably cute gurgly infant noises.  It crushed me.  Suddenly I absolutely lost it, right then and there and had to make a mad dash out of the salon and into my car.  I bawled and bawled.  

And people have the nerve to ask us when we are having children!


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## DisneyPhD

TDC Nala said:
			
		

> Nope. I work too much to take care of animals. I have two plants. One looks dead, though.




I can't seem to keep plants (or fish) alive for that mater.  Luckily I am better with kids and pets!!!!!    

c&ldisneylovers, I know just what you are talking about.  And yes you have plently of time.  I can't imagine living with some of the patients I had either.  I think some of their poor parents were saints!  I fell very blessed that I have 2 happy and healthy children.

hucifer,    I am sorry, that is so  hard.  My sister in law had the same struggles.  She came over for dinner tonight, she is 8 weeks pregnant right now and beside herself (she does't want to pinch herself for fear she will wake up!)  I hope it happens soon for you.


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## J.Cooper

donald...really said:
			
		

> No kids. No desire. No interest. No explanations. No apologies. No one ones business.
> 
> Just two wonderful dogs.




    I love it!!!!!!!!


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## hucifer

DisneyPhD said:
			
		

> hucifer,    I am sorry, that is so  hard.  My sister in law had the same struggles.  She came over for dinner tonight, she is 8 weeks pregnant right now and beside herself (she does't want to pinch herself for fear she will wake up!)  I hope it happens soon for you.


Thank you so much!  I wish that for us very much.


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## Rozzie

We are happy to be DINKS.   

 I can't imagine having children.  Sometimes the thought crosses my mind, until I spend time with my nephews and nieces who drive me batty.  We are really happy, and the questions are dying down now, we have been married for almost 8 years.  I think people are starting to realize there is no point in asking.  I never would want to have a child because I thought I "needed to" bend in to societies pressures.

PhotoBearSam----looks like we might run into each other!   Have a great trip, we arrive the 29th, be on property the 30th.


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## kennancat

I have to say that I'm really happy to see how mature this thread has stayed so far. I've participated in similar threads where it ends up breaking down into the parents vs. the childfree people.

I have to wonder if some of the people who react so negatively to the idea of choosing not to have children never realized it was a choice in their own lives and are subconsciously embarrassed or upset at that realization. I haven't been labeled as "selfish" yet by anybody for not wanting kids, and frankly, it seems really strange to me that anybody would assume I was selfish because of it. People can have kids for really selfish reasons too. I know one couple that had kids because their marriage was in trouble and they didnt want people to know how bad it was. I know another woman that had a baby because she was afraid that her boyfriend was going to break up with her and thought that getting pregnant would make it so he couldn't dump her. I think putting parenthood on a pedestal is bad for both parents and non-parents.

DH and I are both 30 and on the fence when it comes to kids. We definitely don't want them right now. Frankly, I don't really like kids. I don't enjoy children's antics, find babies cute, etc. I do feel bad about that as a woman because sometimes I think that makes me a freak. At any rate, if our feelings don't change radically in the next 8 - 9 years, then I don't see us choosing to have children. Personally, I feel very, very strongly that every child deserves to come into this world wanted. If it were up to me, we'd license parenthood and make people show that they're emotionally and financially prepared to have children first. I know, not really possible  By the way, I had a very happy childhood and am very close to my parents. That's probably part of the reason why I feel so strongly about it - I think everybody deserves to be as blessed as I was.

In the end, I think life is what you make of it. I expect most parents probably (hopefully) are glad they made the choice to have kids and can't imagine their lives any other way. I also think that people who choose not to have kids can look back at their lives and feel that they're glad they didn't have kids because they would have missed out on so many experiences. I think what's truly important is that both parties respect the others' lives and not try to trivialize them just because they made different choices.

Sorry for the long post - as you can tell, I've thought about this topic a great deal!


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## Krissalee

kennancat said:
			
		

> I have to wonder if some of the people who react so negatively to the idea of choosing not to have children never realized it was a choice in their own lives and are subconsciously embarrassed or upset at that realization.





			
				kennancat said:
			
		

> I think what's truly important is that both parties respect the others' lives and not try to trivialize them just because they made different choices.




I could not agree more, kennancat, and appreciate your input greatly!


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## spiceycat

I think it is also a generation thing.

my mother's and even mind generation except people to have children if they could.

if they couldn't they were to adopt.

times have changed.

I love children. they are fun for a while.

they go back home to their parents.

I never planned on having children because they are so darn expensive.

I am able to surpose myself. A child and no more disney, no more vacation period.

I have a lot of I's in this post but one more.

If my father was live (he died when I was 14 years old), I would probably be married and killing people.

some people should not marry nor have children.

I would never have my own kids - lots of the illiness - allergies, insanity are passed along.

I have considered adoption. but kids need alot of time.


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## pearlieq

DH and I are childfree and darn happy about it at the moment!  We're still on the fence as to the future, but for now we really like our life.  

kennancat--I totally hear where you're coming from about licensing!  I mean, really--you need a license to fish but any old idiot can reproduce!

I've only heard the "selfish" thing once or twice but it makes me livid!  Having children is NOT an unselfish act--most people have kids because they want someone to love, or want to carry on their family, or want to enjoy the fun of a child, or want to be part of the nuclear family unit that they believe is "right" and "normal", or because they got carried away and their birth control failed.  Not one of those reasons is altruistic.  They are all "selfish"--people have kids to gratify their own wants.  No kid can ask to be born.  Of course, there's nothing wrong with having kids, but let's not delude ourselves that it's some kind of good work and that those who don't are somehow deficient!


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## las3888

Thought I would add my 2cents since this is a topic sort of near and dear to my heart.

To be as brief as I can, DH and I (married 8 yrs now and on the older side) both could have gone either way.  We weren't "kid people" ...never cooed at other's babies or even noticed kids or babies (unless they were loud and obnoxious).  

As my biological clock ticked and tocked we thought and prayed and had no idea what to do about having kids.  Didn't really want them, but were we missing something???    

Well, we did end up having DS (after 2 miscarriages).  We just had him this year.  I am almost 40 and DH is in mid-40s--not that age matters (yeah, right).  Anyways, it just was meant to be.  

We are so happy.  Believe me...we were major travellers, had tons of frequent flier miles, had DVC, went on tons of cruises, loved to go to movies...I could go on and on.  Anyways, DS has obviously changed our lives but really, I do mean this, for the better.  I know it is so cliche to say that but I knew the day I had him that I did the right thing.  I really spent alot of the pregnancy wondering and worrying how my life would change.  From one who loves to travel, loves freedom, and was not in any way shape or form a kid person, I am so happy I had DS!!!

In the end after all of my rambling, my 2 cents is that you do have to do what is right for you.  If you are SURE you don't want to have kids, embrace it.  If you are on the fence, IMO, I think you should go for it.  I now understand there is a whole part of life, really, a huge part that would be missing today if we didn't have DS this past Feb.  

Good luck and best to you...enjoy you life no matter what!  Lisa


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## kennancat

las3888 said:
			
		

> If you are on the fence, IMO, I think you should go for it.


My thought has been that if we don't have kids and realize we made a mistake, we have only hurt ourselves. If we DO have kids and realize that we made a mistake, we've now dragged an innocent child into our mess. I would think most people grow to love their children even if it wasn't what they'd planned - after all, it makes sense that we would be biologically programmed to feel that way. Unfortunately, not every parent reaches that stage, as shown by the existence of government agencies like HRS. So I'm still not sure what the right answer is, but I'm glad that it is becoming more socially acceptable to make the choice that you feel is right for you, not what society expects of you.


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## monty

Thought you might like to get a point of view from someone who "did change their mind". I was married at 20 and although I loved my nieces and nephews dearly,I didn't really want any of my own.(and I didn't want any boys!) Since I got married so young I figured there was heaps of time, anyway. Reach the age of 26 or so and realise despite there being plenty of times I could have fallen pregnant I have'nt, concluded there is something wrong and I should probably go and check things out, incase I change my mind in the future. Well, there were some medical problems diagnosed and I couldn't get out of my head that I _may_ change my mind _one_ day, so perhaps I should undertake the suggested treatment. Well...the treatment worked really well...in 3 months I was pregnant with my first child. Four years later I had my second. Fast forward to the present...the eldest is 22, my youngest will be 18 in 3 weeks.They get along great with their stepdad of 7 years and youv'e probably guessed...they are both boys.I wouldn't have wanted things any other way!!
Krisalee you do whatever feels right for you and your DH. Fate has a way of working things out!


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## DisneyPhD

Some very interesting answers on this thread, I too am very proud of how civil it is. 

One comment.  While no one every feels bad for couples in their 20's 30's 40's and 50's with out kids, I always felt sad for couples in their 70's and 80's and above with no kids.  I had some patients when I was a therapist that never could have kids and they were so lonely when they were older.  (they weren't able to have kids, they were deaf and she was unvolenterly sererilzed as a kis, another horrible story.  )  They did have extented family that was there for them, but at this point they were very sad about never having a family of their own (not was much when they were younger since they were so active and had many friends.)  

Of course there are MANY people who had kids, and their now adult children and grandchildren don't visist or care for them when they are older so that isn't a promise. 

I know we one reason we were sure we wanted more then 1 child was my MIL is an only child and his mother is now 96 years old. It is so much presure to "care' for her by himself.  Of course I have 3 brothers and chances are all the responibily for my parents will fall on me, so that does't always work.


----------



## Pea-n-Me

DH and I were together for 15 years    before our children were born. For most of those years we put up with these same annoying questions from everyone. We were quite happy with life as it was with work, school, fun, and our dogs keeping us plenty busy and fulfilled.  Our standard answer to these inquiries was that_ we already had two kids_ (our dogs, LOL - that annoyed a lot of people right back).    

Although most of our contemporary friends and family had children during that time, we weren't sure we wanted any and certainly weren't going to be pressured into it by _anyone_. Neither of us were "kid people" either, and the thought of being pregnant sent me over the edge. I did, however, always picture myself having a little girl (about 8yo   ), and somehow as the years went on I knew that was something I had to figure out how to achieve despite my apprehension about pregnacy, babies and such. 

One day we decided to throw caution to the wind and give it a shot, with (DH indulging) my still thinking about that little girl of my dreams. Lo and behold, no go. We hit the wall of infertility.   It was then we realized the choice we once enjoyed about whether to have children was no longer there: in our case _we couldn't_. And that's what helped us realize we really did want a family. It took a long time but we were finally blessed with not only a little girl, but a little boy as well (twins). Those early years were tough and sometimes we wondered what life would have been like had we remained childless, but now that they're 8yo    we can't imagine not having them and are grateful to God for giving them to us. 

It all boils down to personal choice and what works for you.   

Sometimes I hear my elderly mother say things to people like the things we're talking about and I cringe. I've thought about it a lot having experienced it myself, and I think that many people just aren't sensitive to others' feelings or respectful of others' choices. To them they can't imagine why someone would want to remain childless (or name one of the many other things that there could be insensitivity about). I don't think people do it to be rude or mean, they just aren't sensitive to others' situations.


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## kellyanne731

It fascinates me that so many people assume married couples want/are supposed to have kids.  When I was 16 I knew I didn't want children.  I'm now 27, engaged, in grad school, and looking to buy a house this spring.  Kids still aren't anything I'm thinking about.  DF likes kids when he can send them home with their parents, I'd just rather not be bothered at all.  I think children are a life decision, and I get really offended by the people who tell me I should be starting a "family", or that I'll change my mind because everyone does.  As far as I'm concerned, fiance, pets and I are a family.    

We are the couple that avoids early movies so we're not around children, and asks to not be seated near children in restaurants.  I get angry if there's a baby on my flight.  But there are certain situations where I love being around children.  I love seeing their faces light up and how much fun they're having when I'm at Disney.  I also love being around them in learning environments like school.  Which helps considering I'm getting my degree in school counseling.  

Mom considers the dog to be her grandchild.  My dad, on the other hand, desperately wants a grandchild.  And since my brother lives on the other side of the world and can avoid the phone calls, I'm the one catching all of dad's longings for the pitter patter of little feet.

Every now and again I think that I might want a child, but I fail to see how that is anyone else's business.  Whatever happens in my life will happen for a reason.


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## Claudia Kellenberger

I am 52 and do not have any children.  It is very much a personal choice, you don't  *Owe  *  anyone any answers.  All three of my daughters were born premature and died. ( Two pregnancies )  Seeing that doctors could not really discover what exactly was wrong with me, I waited five more years, and then got my tubes tied.   Although I still mourn for my children that I did have,  I have never mourned for the other children I  _could  _  have had.
My life is pretty full.  When some rude person presses me for an answer,
I have answered:  " I would rather have *NO* children, than another dead one".


----------



## Kimberly815

I am 25 and getting married next year.  This is a subject that my fiancé and I have been discussing at length lately.  We have several friends (couples) who you might call 'baby crazy'.  Our friend was baby sitting the other day, and the baby was in love with my fiancé.  Our friend asked if my fiancé wanted to hold the baby, and his answer was No, thank you.  I dont hold babies.  LOL.  We just do not share such enthusiasm.  I can see us possibly having a child, but we are still not sure if it is for us.  Ironically, both his family and mine think that we will be the first in both families to have children after getting married.

There are so many things that I worry about when I consider us having children.   I have my Bachelor Degree, my fiancé does not.  I am the breadwinner, though my fiancé is a very hard worker and earns his fair share.   Would someone stay home with the child?  How would we afford it (we are doing alright, renting, saving a little, but no home)?  On the other hand, would we be missing so many special moments?  Will I change my mind and want one within the next few years (My fiancé seems to think I will once my biological clock starts ticking!)?  Do I want to go back for my Master's Degree?  If I do, do I want to go before or after becoming a Mom?  There are more questions than I could ever answer.

I dont know what we will end up choosing.  I do know that we will never try to have children.   If we decide we want children, we will stop preventing it, and let nature take its course (if it is meant to be, it will happen.  Although I do completely understand those who do more in order to start their families.  It is just not for us.).  

However, I would like to thank everyone who has posted for such a fair and decent opinion for both sides.  It helps people to know that, no matter what they chose, life is wonderful and happiness is to be found regardless.


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## DisneyPhD

Claudia Kellenberger said:
			
		

> I am 52 and do not have any children.  It is very much a personal choice, you don't  *Owe  *  anyone any answers.  All three of my daughters were born premature and died. ( Two pregnancies )  Seeing that doctors could not really discover what exactly was wrong with me, I waited five more years, and then got my tubes tied.   Although I still mourn for my children that I did have,  I have never mourned for the other children I  _could  _  have had.
> My life is pretty full.  When some rude person presses me for an answer,
> I have answered:  " I would rather have *NO* children, than another dead one".




Claudia Kellenberger      I am sorry.  We just got the news that my SIL is no longer pregnant.  I am so sad for them.


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## DVCJEN

DH and I are both 33 and we have struggled with the "do we or don't we want children" question.  We have a great marriage and are best friends. We have been married for 10 years.  When we first were married, we said "someday" but so far someday hasn't come.  I love children I have a neice and nephew I adore and two godsons that are great.  I love being around them but I have never really felt my biological clock ticking.  Sure I have had a shot of "hmmm maybe a baby would be nice" but it has never really went beyond that.  I believe we would be good parents if we chose to do so but so far it has not been a priority or a desire.  Will this change?  I don't know.  Right now we have a very happy life.  
It does bother my very traditional family.  They like to ask personal questions such as "is there something wrong with one of you?"  "who will take care of you when you are old?"  or my favorite--- "do you hate kids?"  I love my family but they really don't seem to undersand being married without children.   I guess we are a bit of a curiosity among some people but that's ok, we are happy.


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## las3888

Just wanted to mention my experience as far as the biological clock.  I really didn't feel it until late 30's...early 30's, mid 30's, I always felt I had plenty of time and just put off making any decisions (20's forget it - kids were not even a blip on the radar).  For those of you that are not nearing 40 yet, don't be surprised if one day you hear that clock ticking!!  I also want to add to not take that the wrong way...not having kids is easily the route we could have gone and there's nothing wrong with that.


----------



## NeverlandClub23

DisneyPhD said:
			
		

> Some very interesting answers on this thread, I too am very proud of how civil it is.
> 
> One comment.  While no one every feels bad for couples in their 20's 30's 40's and 50's with out kids, I always felt sad for couples in their 70's and 80's and above with no kids.



Me too!! I always joke around with the people that I work with that I'm going to be one of those white haired old ladies on those tour group buses with all of the other old ladies who go to places like Colonial Williamsburg (Of course I used to live 10 min. from there and I loved it growing up) and hold hands when they walk around. It is kind of sad thinking about when I get older and my parents are gone and my DFi is gone that all I'll have is my little old lady friends but then I can look back at all of the memories I have and what a wonderful life I had and be able to let it go. Anyways, my wonderful co-workers tell me I'm going to be that old lady that peeks out from her windows staring at her neighbors and yells at kids to get off her lawn. Something to look forward too.


----------



## cnaumann

_Is it our duty to populate an already over-populated world?_

_Sometimes I tell people with all the problems this planet has with overpopulation, we are being socially responsible by not having children._

_ As for me I would like to have children, but I don't know about conciously bringing one into our world. I would much rather adopt, but sadly that is very expensive._

I used to believe all the hype about overpopulation. I dont believe it anymore. Population is a very delicate balance. If the birth rate is just over that magical 2.0 the population grows exponentially. If it is just under 2.0, the population sinks exponentially. Extrapolating any current trends will lead to all sorts of scary predications. The world population today has not reached the dire predications of overcrowding and mass starvation that were made in the 1960s. In fact, in many areas, populations are actually shrinking at a rather alarming pace. Population is an amazing balance; we are on a razors edge and are simultaneously at risk for both severe over population and severe under population. 

No one should feel obligated to have kids. Similarly, it fine to have kids as long as you are able and willing to raise them. Peoples willingness to have kids and willingness not to have kids are what keeps the population from either growing out of control or shrinking out of control. Dont feel there is some social obligation or need to either have kids by conception or adoption or not to have kids. Be selfish! Do what you want to do as long as you are capable.

If you ask me, all the problems this planet has has little to do with over population and everything to do with people that cannot see beyond their own lifetimes. 

_ I'm not married, I'm 25, so relatively young,_

In terms of lifespan, you are relatively young. In terms of fertility, you are already middle aged. You are almost half way through your most fertile years. There is a growing trend to put off baby making until later in life. Many people assume that they will still be able to conceive well into there 30s and even 40s. Unfortunately, nature often has other plans. 

_ I get annoyed too when everyone says "Oh! You'll change your minds! Kids are the greatest blessings!"_

It is always annoying when people tell you how you are _should_ think or how you _going to_ think.. It is very much like DisneyPhDs example of a second grade boys opinion on kissing a girl. Some change their mind, some dont. But nobody wants to be treated like a second grader. 

_ I've participated in similar threads where it ends up breaking down into the parents vs. the childfree people._

There is a huge gap between parents and childfree people. It is not surprising that it breaks down that way. When we were younger and single, we used to hang around other single people our age. I though that might change after we were married, but it did not, we still hung around the same people. Then we had a kid. That changed everything. We no longer hung around non-parents. When we did go out, it was also with other parents and we always ended up talking about changing diapers and toilet training.

I have read this thread, and I understand that lots of people do not like to be asked if they are planning on having kids. I still do not understand _why_ this is such a taboo subject. I think it is probably one of the most important decisions that a couple can make. If one partner wants kids and the other does not, the relationship is pretty much doomed. So there should be a simple answer, be it yes we want to get started soon, yes, but maybe not right away, or a simple no or we havent decided. Why is this considered such a deep and personal question? Is it any more deep and personal than asking a couple if they are planning on buying a house? Is it answering the same question over and over again that is the issue? Is it the follow-up lecture on how you will change your mind later? Is it the constant pressure from grandparent-want-to-bes? Or is something else entirely? Maybe the partners are not quite on agreement with each other, and it is an uncomfortable question.


----------



## SlightlyGoofy

> One comment. While no one every feels bad for couples in their 20's 30's 40's and 50's with out kids, I always felt sad for couples in their 70's and 80's and above with no kids.




I have many friends who are older and they have their 'children' living with them,not to  help, but to be helped.

I have one dear friend whose only son and dil tricked her into signing everything over to them and then they abandoned her in a nursing home.  Luckily one of her brothers got her out and moved her to Florida to be with him.  She is 56.

I visit another friend in a nursing home who devoted her entire life to her adopted daughter and now she lies alone and forgotten.

Having children does not guarantee a thing either way.  

I am for having children, or not, as you want.  It is sad to see children who are not wanted. I work at the local Community Center and see a wide range.

If  you have them, enjoy them and make sure that you take care of your retirement so that you are not a burden or worse yet, at your child's mercy.

I had two children.  I have not seen my son in nearly 4 years and while I am very close to my daughter's two children and they are with me often I cannot say we have a wonderful relationship. 

 Would I do it again?  Yes, love is an odd thing.  I have a lot of children in my life and greatly enjoy them.  It is as close to heaven as I will get on Earth.

Slightly Goofy


----------



## TDC Nala

> Why is this considered such a deep and personal question? Is it any more deep and personal than asking a couple if they are planning on buying a house? Is it answering the same question over and over again that is the issue? Is it the follow-up lecture on how you will change your mind later? Is it the constant pressure from grandparent-want-to-bes? Or is something else entirely?



I think it is because marriage and children is a major societal expectation; almost everyone does it. When you don't follow the expectations, a lot of persons who already did want to know why you aren't going along. I'm not clear on their reasons for wanting to know, unless it affects their life and their family (such as a parent who always expected grandchildren). I was just relieved when I got old enough that people (and I don't mean family members, I mean relative strangers) stopped asking when I planned to get married. If I said anything that sounded like I had no plans to get married, they seemed put out, and I don't know why since my choices couldn't possibly have any effect on them. Never got past the marriage thing so I never had to deal with the questions about children, but those would have been next.

I'll never have children and will most likely never have a spouse. If that makes you sad, why? If it ticks you off, what's the deal? I'm not you, I'm not your family, you don't even know me, and it shouldn't bother you what I do either way.

But when the question is "why not?",  and the real answer is "I don't want to," the reaction to that answer is generally something verbal or non-verbal that seems to translate to "boy, are YOU weird" and it's not uplifting to be made to feel that way.


----------



## metivier

kellyanne731 said:
			
		

> It fascinates me that so many people assume married couples want/are supposed to have kids.  When I was 16 I knew I didn't want children.  I'm now 27, engaged, in grad school, and looking to buy a house this spring.  Kids still aren't anything I'm thinking about.  DF likes kids when he can send them home with their parents, I'd just rather not be bothered at all.  I think children are a life decision, and I get really offended by the people who tell me I should be starting a "family", or that I'll change my mind because everyone does.  As far as I'm concerned, fiance, pets and I are a family.
> 
> We are the couple that avoids early movies so we're not around children, and asks to not be seated near children in restaurants.  I get angry if there's a baby on my flight.



Your description sounds like me and DH (then DF) when I was 27.  I had received my Master's degree, was happily working, looking to buy a house.  I pretty much avoided kids and DH liked to "coo coo" at kids and then send them on their way.  We got married 4 days after my 28th birthday.  

We, too, got "the question" over MANY years.  My first replies were along the lines of "Why do you ask?"  When the replies got way too personal, I would either reply "It's none of your business" or perhaps turn the tables and ask a very private question back (along the lines of what "position" they preferred   ) in the hopes of shocking them back to reality.

When I was 36, DH and I began to change our minds about children.  It took us a "while" after we decided to head down the quest for baby route, but now I'm 42 with two great children.  I would NOT trade our time "pre-children" for anything.  I also would not trade our time now for anything.  They are just different stops along the journey.

I guess what I am saying is do what you and your partner want, and always be willing to listen to your heart and alter your journey/path a little.


----------



## DisneyPhD

SlightlyGoofy said:
			
		

> I have many friends who are older and they have their 'children' living with them,not to  help, but to be helped.
> 
> I have one dear friend whose only son and dil tricked her into signing everything over to them and then they abandoned her in a nursing home.  Luckily one of her brothers got her out and moved her to Florida to be with him.  She is 56.
> 
> I visit another friend in a nursing home who devoted her entire life to her adopted daughter and now she lies alone and forgotten.
> 
> Having children does not guarantee a thing either way.
> 
> I am for having children, or not, as you want.  It is sad to see children who are not wanted. I work at the local Community Center and see a wide range.
> 
> If  you have them, enjoy them and make sure that you take care of your retirement so that you are not a burden or worse yet, at your child's mercy.
> 
> I had two children.  I have not seen my son in nearly 4 years and while I am very close to my daughter's two children and they are with me often I cannot say we have a wonderful relationship.
> 
> Would I do it again?  Yes, love is an odd thing.  I have a lot of children in my life and greatly enjoy them.  It is as close to heaven as I will get on Earth.
> 
> Slightly Goofy



You only quoted part of what I said, I also said: 

"Of course there are MANY people who had kids, and their now adult children and grandchildren don't visist or care for them when they are older so that isn't a promise."

You are right many people have had adult age, but not adult matureity children continue who to mooch off them and use instead of help their parents in old age.  There are many reason for this.  (some has to do with the persons orgianl parenting skills, some don't.)  You know kind of "Cat in the Cradel" thing, or always codling the kid so they never learn to stand on their own.  Sometimes the nicest people, don't make the best parents (too nice, come on we all know an example of this.)   


cnaumann, you have some very interesting points.  I think one reason it is so touchy is people feel very stronly about their reasons, and sometimes are still tying to work them out themselves.  I think one of ther reasons it comes up so much is it is universal, or at least something that ties perfect strangers together. (much as it is bond between adults who don't want kids on this this thread "Finally someone who feels the same way."  It is natural progression of a marriage (but not as assumed as it was a few generations ago as many pointed out.)   When you do have kids and you ask another person if they have kids, they say yes and you know they "get it".   I admit I don't have as much to talk about with my friends who don't have kids, because they don't understand my day to day trials and issues as much (and normally don't appericate my mondane stories like other mom's do.)  

TDC Nala, I guess the qoute that comes to mind is "Never say Never".  You just never know.    (not so much about not having kids, but never having a spose.)  Sometimes life throws you for loop.


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## kennancat

cnaumann said:
			
		

> I have read this thread, and I understand that lots of people do not like to be asked if they are planning on having kids.


I can really go either way on this one. I don't see any issue with asking somebody if they do have kids - to me that's simple getting-to-know-you chit chat. Asking if you are planning to have kids can be sensitive for a couple of reasons. In the thread I referenced earlier, I thought one poster had a really good point about couple who have reached the kid age and don't have any: A) it's either because they don't want any or B) they want them and they're having trouble getting them. With B, I think it's clear why that question could be hurtful. If it's A, asking the question can automatically put people on the defensive - I know it does for me. It really depends on if the person is genuinely interested in my reasons, or if he or she is just waiting to tell me that I'm wrong. This is assuming of course, that this is a close enough friend to even be inquiring about it. I do think it's different than asking about buying a house because it hits closer to what my core values and opinions are, and I don't discuss those with people that I don't know decently well. Unless they're perfect strangers on the internet, of course


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## TDC Nala

> TDC Nala, I guess the qoute that comes to mind is "Never say Never". You just never know.  (not so much about not having kids, but never having a spose.) Sometimes life throws you for loop.



Well, this is what I mean, it kind of seems as though you felt the need to reassure me about some shortcoming I have. I understand stuff happens, this is why I put "most likely" in my post. But I'm not really interested in acquiring a spouse, and I'm not looking for one, and it really only bothers me that I don't have one when others emphasize how different I am because I don't. That might be kind of like the questions others get about children when they genuinely don't want to have them.


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## DisneyPhD

TDC Nala said:
			
		

> Well, this is what I mean, it kind of seems as though you felt the need to reassure me about some shortcoming I have. I understand stuff happens, this is why I put "most likely" in my post. But I'm not really interested in acquiring a spouse, and I'm not looking for one, and it really only bothers me that I don't have one when others emphasize how different I am because I don't. That might be kind of like the questions others get about children when they genuinely don't want to have them.



I don't feel any choices you have made in your life are shortcomings (as you said you seem to get this a lot form people who it really shouldn't matter at all, it is your life not theirs.)  I also don't think if someone doesn't get married they aren't as good as people who do, or there is something wrong with them.  

So maybe what you mean is "if you never have kids or never get married you won't feel like your life is incomplete or not as good as someone elses who did" or something along those lines.  You just don't see it heading in that direction and that is fine with you. 

I just meant, you never know what life has ahead for you.


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## pearlieq

Well now I've got something new to think about--why is it OK to ask whether someone has kids, but not whether they're planning on kids?  Hmm...

I guess "do you have kids?" is easily answered with yes or no and the line of questioning usually ends there.  It's a purely informational question like are you married, where do you life, or where do you work.  

To me "are you planning on kids" takes it one step too far.  You don't get to know my plans--I may not even be sure of my plans.  It seems to query into the intent and reasons behind my behavior, which isn't really out for public examination.  Plus, people seem to take your answer, if you choose to give one, as an invitation to offer commentary and opinions.  

Interesting question, though.  I know I'll keep thinking about it for a while.


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## HaleyB

Just had to jump in and say, even having kids will not prevent this sort of question...

"So, when are you guys going to have another baby?"  

I feel your pain.  So far as I know the only right way to respond to rudeness is not to.  I am not a hardliner, though, I do roll my eyes (follwed by the arched brow) whenever I get that question.


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## cnaumann

_When you don't follow the expectations, a lot of persons who already did want to know why you aren't going along. I'm not clear on their reasons for wanting to know, unless it affects their life and their family_

When I was yonger, before I had kids of my own, I did ask co-workers and other people that were not really close friends about their views on kids. Part of it was just casual conversation, part of it was gathering information for my own use. I wasn't sure if I wanted kids, and I was really looking for input. As I am now a whole lot older and just a little bit wiser, I try not to ask people about there plans for having kids. 

I would say that I never ask, but I did recently ask a co-worker I he was thinking about having kids. There was nothing any more judgemental in my question than there would have been if I was asking if he liked roller coasters.  

_But when the question is "why not?", and the real answer is "I don't want to," the reaction to that answer is generally something verbal or non-verbal that seems to translate to "boy, are YOU weird" and it's not uplifting to be made to feel that way._

That make sense. I think that people who don't like rollercoasters are wierd, but I guess it is different when someone gives you the " boy are you wierd" look for not liking rollercoasters than it is when someone gives you that same look for not wanting to have children.


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## kymma

I get asked a lot about kids.  I am 38 and have been married to my DH for 11 years.  We don't get the question as often anymore but we still get it.

I even had someone ask me why we even bothered getting married if we aren't going to have kids.  

On our recent Disney Cruise we also encoutered the question along with what I considered rudeness.  While we were eating in Palo, the couple sitting at the table next to us asked us "Are your kids in the clubs, too?".  We replied "We don't have children".  And the guy said "oh what do you have dogs or cats or something" then laughed.  His wife kinda gasped at his rude remark.  I couldn't believe it.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

kymma said:
			
		

> I get asked a lot about kids.  I am 38 and have been married to my DH for 11 years.  We don't get the question as often anymore but we still get it.
> 
> I even had someone ask me why we even bothered getting married if we aren't going to have kids.
> 
> On our recent Disney Cruise we also encoutered the question along with what I considered rudeness.  While we were eating in Palo, the couple sitting at the table next to us asked us "Are your kids in the clubs, too?".  We replied "We don't have children".  And the guy said "oh what do you have dogs or cats or something" then laughed.  His wife kinda gasped at his rude remark.  I couldn't believe it.



He seems a good example of the saying "It's better to be silent and be thought a fool, then to open one's mouth and remove all doubt".


----------



## TDC Nala

> I guess it is different when someone gives you the " boy are you wierd" look for not liking rollercoasters than it is when someone gives you that same look for not wanting to have children.



Sure! There's no societal expectation that you ought to like rollercoasters. Hey, maybe there should be. I love rollercoasters.


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## PrincessKitty

kymma said:
			
		

> I get asked a lot about kids.  I am 38 and have been married to my DH for 11 years.  We don't get the question as often anymore but we still get it.
> 
> I even had someone ask me why we even bothered getting married if we aren't going to have kids.
> 
> On our recent Disney Cruise we also encoutered the question along with what I considered rudeness.  While we were eating in Palo, the couple sitting at the table next to us asked us "Are your kids in the clubs, too?".  We replied "We don't have children".  And the guy said "oh what do you have dogs or cats or something" then laughed.  His wife kinda gasped at his rude remark.  I couldn't believe it.



I always say, "Yeah, I think people have kids as a substitute for pets."


----------



## PrincessKitty

HaleyB said:
			
		

> Just had to jump in and say, even having kids will not prevent this sort of question...
> 
> "So, when are you guys going to have another baby?"
> 
> I feel your pain.  So far as I know the only right way to respond to rudeness is not to.  I am not a hardliner, though, I do roll my eyes (follwed by the arched brow) whenever I get that question.



Yes! I have friend in her early 30s who just had a baby (her first, not her husband's first), and people are CONSTANTLY asking her this.  She wants another baby and her husband is reluctant, so this could be a painful question.  Why would anybody ask a question that could cause pain?  I guess we all don't always think before we ask questions!


----------



## PrincessKitty

cnaumann said:
			
		

> _ Why is this considered such a deep and personal question? Is it any more deep and personal than asking a couple if they are planning on buying a house? _


_

Uh, yeah, it's just a tiny bit more personal than asking if a couple is planning to buy a house.  _


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## taswira

Some people think couples who choose not to have children are being "selfish." Why is that? To be selfish is to consider one's self over others, in a way that might hurt or deprive others. Choosing not to have kids is in no way selfish. After all, the world is not _under_-populated. It will not suffer for the lack of those children we and others _choose_ not to have.

I had a large part in raising my nephew - took him to Disneyland every weekend when he was growing up, was his Cub Scout den mother, walked him to school, etc. So it isn't like I had anything against children. But my lifestyle involves a lot of travel (including international) by choice. From the time I was about 12, I knew I did not want to have children. Disney, character meals and encounters, Disney cruises? - Been there, done that, will keep doing it as long as possible and I LOVE it! I don't have to live my life _through_ a child, because I can still view life with childlike wonder. I guess spending so much time at WDW does that to me.  

What bugs me is when someone asks if I have any kids (or assumes I do) and when I say "_No - no kids_" they remark, "_I'm sorry_." I reply, "_Sorry for what? It was my choice and I am supremely happy! I hope you are happy with your choice as well._"


----------



## Ember

DisneyPhD said:
			
		

> 1st, I am not arugeing with  your choice, but it sounds like most of the answer given at based in self centernedness and imaturiety. (I like doing what I want, I still am kid or married to one, I don't want to give up my currenlty lifestyle for chidlren, I like being able to what I want and not have to think about kids or be resonsible for them........)  All very good reasons not to have kids.



While I agree with the sentiment of this, that these ARE good reasons not to have kids, I disagree strongly that all people who don't want children are self-centered and immature.  Nor do I think everyone who has children is mature and giving.  

I think far too many people have chidren without really thinking it through.  They do it because there's an expectation from society (ie: you get married and then have kids), or because it happens accidentally.  And far too often it's not what they *really* wanted.  How often do you hear laments from parents over the things they didn't do?  ("I always wanted to backpack across Europe," or "if I could go back I would make different choices.")  This isn't to say this makes bad parents by any means, but I do think it indicates a subtle resentment that their lives are no longer theirs.  (I also don't think most parents would ever admit to this, becuase they *do* love their kids.)  But how many parents are divoriced becauce one of them couldn't handle having kids, how it changed the relationship, or wanted their lives back?

I think people who decide to have children make the best parents when they've thought about it and are fully ready to commit to it.  For the rest of your life you have to joyfully put someone else's needs and desires ahead of your own.  To not desire to to so does not make someone self-centered or immature (anymore than not donating every cent you make to charity makes you greedy), but to have children without fully knowing what you're getting into is very irresponsible.  

And as to the idea of parents not understanding why not everyone wants to share their "joy" in raising kids... I've known some pretty un-happy people who are parents...


----------



## DisneyPhD

Ember said:
			
		

> While I agree with the sentiment of this, that these ARE good reasons not to have kids, I disagree strongly that all people who don't want children are self-centered and immature.  Nor do I think everyone who has children is mature and giving.
> 
> I think far too many people have chidren without really thinking it through.  They do it because there's an expectation from society (ie: you get married and then have kids), or because it happens accidentally.  And far too often it's not what they *really* wanted.  How often do you hear laments from parents over the things they didn't do?  ("I always wanted to backpack across Europe," or "if I could go back I would make different choices.")  This isn't to say this makes bad parents by any means, but I do think it indicates a subtle resentment that their lives are no longer theirs.  (I also don't think most parents would ever admit to this, becuase they *do* love their kids.)  But how many parents are divoriced becauce one of them couldn't handle having kids, how it changed the relationship, or wanted their lives back?
> 
> I think people who decide to have children make the best parents when they've thought about it and are fully ready to commit to it.  For the rest of your life you have to joyfully put someone else's needs and desires ahead of your own.  To not desire to to so does not make someone self-centered or immature (anymore than not donating every cent you make to charity makes you greedy), but to have children without fully knowing what you're getting into is very irresponsible.
> 
> And as to the idea of parents not understanding why not everyone wants to share their "joy" in raising kids... I've known some pretty un-happy people who are parents...




1st, I need to say that I totally agree with you.  I became at parent at age 30 and was very ready for the changes and sacrafices parenthood has bought into my life. I am very grateful that I had time before becoming a parent to focus on my educaiton, marriage and what I wanted to do.  

I still stand by my comment, but I wish I could explain it better (ever since typing it.)  It isn't that people who chose not to become a parent are selfish, it is the reasons often given to other people sound self centered and therefore can be precived as "not yet ready" to be a parent, or reasons that can change as your mature.    More that the common explainations given to others sounds selfish.  (I don't want to give up my current life style where I am the center of my life and I enjoy it.)  If that is the way you feel, then you are not ready for kids (and may or may not ever be.)  Many people who once felt that way, no longer do. 

As I said before, it is better to be aware of it and choose not to have children, then become a parent for the wrong reasons and be unhappy about it.  

I do not want to judge anyone who choose not to become a parent, just trying to shed some light on why people may continue to questions them.  (I myself don't.)


----------



## tlbwriter

I hate it when people say "We don't want to have kids because we're too selfish." It is not selfish to enjoy the life you're living and have no desire to change it. Selfishness hurts others. Deciding not to have children doesn't hurt anybody (except parents who whine about how you're not going to give them grandchildren). 

Someone brought this issue up in a different group a long time ago, and one man chastized those who chose not to have children. He insisted they should all have children, even the ones who said they weren't having any because (a) they seriously disliked children, or (b) they liked children but knew they would be bad parents. He said you need to have children so someone will love you (as if you're so unloveable now, you have to reproduce to make someone who finds you loveable) and so someone will take care of you in your own age! Now that, I think, is supremely selfish.


----------



## taswira

DisneyPhD said:
			
		

> More that the common explainations given to others sounds selfish.  (I don't want to give up my current life style where I am the center of my life and I enjoy it.)  If that is the way you feel, then you are not ready for kids (and may or may not ever be.)  Many people who once felt that way, no longer do.


_Many_ people in this world who never have children (whether by choice or fate) spend their lives giving their time to others and contributing to the world in their own special way. They are certainly not selfish - in fact perhaps they are less selfish than some of those who must by necessity focus primarily on their own family. 

We all have our purpose in life. Many are prepared to be good parents and that is what they choose. Others become parents by accident or they choose that path because it is expected of them. Sometimes at WDW it seems easy to tell those who were "born to be parents" from those who feel they are "sacrificing" for what they perceive as "normal" (raising a family). Having kids or not is not what determines if one is selfish. If one's hard work benefits others, they contribute to improve their community and the environment, and they enhance the lives of their friends, they are not selfish.

And yes - Having children to not be alone in old age is something almost every parent I know has eventually mentioned to me. Well here's some news - - Not all children outlive their parents, and not all children would devote their lives to their elderly parents either.


----------



## adamak

I too am married for 8 years and no kids.  Not much desire either.  If it happens, great.  If it doesn't, fine with me too.  I don't mind people asking if we have kids.  I do get annoyed when the same people from family, or at work asking me the same thing every month.  One relative even asked, in group dinner, if something is wrong with DH.

My answer to those rude question is always : "No, I don't need a kid to justify my existence, unlike some of you".


----------



## Misty89

HaleyB said:
			
		

> Just had to jump in and say, even having kids will not prevent this sort of question...
> 
> "So, when are you guys going to have another baby?"
> 
> I feel your pain.  So far as I know the only right way to respond to rudeness is not to.  I am not a hardliner, though, I do roll my eyes (follwed by the arched brow) whenever I get that question.


HI

i wanted to reply to this ....i feel the same way. I  married and have 2 children,  DD13 and DD 6  ( yes, eight years) DD was spose to be an only child. We did not plan on another baby, but at 25 i had DD#2. We love them both very much   
 But within 1 year of DD# 2, i had that dept closed for good at 26, I did not want to have anymore children, for sure not  a " late in life" baby ( like 35, or older   ) 
But i know all to well that say "so, when you going to give ____ a sisiter or brother?, " she'll be a good big sister", I simply say that dept is closed and that normally shuts them up. I also sometimes add, that My youngest child will be 18 and i will be  43, I know some moms who are that age and have 2 or 3 Under 10   

so hang in there, and mabye if you get angry enough, tell them to Shut up


----------



## lookingforward

This thread has been so interesting! People will never stop asking endless questions...why no kids?...when will you have more kids? Don't you want a girl after your boy?, etc. etc. I wish they would realize how much of an intrusion it is. For us, the questions have finally ended for the most part. We have three kids, two boys and a girl. My first was at 29, my last at 37. I was asked "when will you give your son a sibling?"...then when I had my second son I was asked 
"are you going to try for a girl?" (as if a boy would somehow be a failure). When I had my daughter people actually judged me for having a baby after 35..."aren't you worried about your age?" of my personal favorite    "are you going to have an amnio? What will you do if there is something wrong with the baby??". I still can't believe that question!
Now, I am in my mid forties and am busy dealing with a teen, a pre teen and a first grader. NOBODY asks me anything anymore...except once in a while they say "you must be so tired, how do you do it??". To which I answer "well..drinking helps" That shuts them up. HA!


----------



## DisneyPhD

taswira said:
			
		

> _Many_ people in this world who never have children (whether by choice or fate) spend their lives giving their time to others and contributing to the world in their own special way. They are certainly not selfish - in fact perhaps they are less selfish than some of those who must by necessity focus primarily on their own family.
> 
> We all have our purpose in life. Many are prepared to be good parents and that is what they choose. Others become parents by accident or they choose that path because it is expected of them. Sometimes at WDW it seems easy to tell those who were "born to be parents" from those who feel they are "sacrificing" for what they perceive as "normal" (raising a family). Having kids or not is not what determines if one is selfish. If one's hard work benefits others, they contribute to improve their community and the environment, and they enhance the lives of their friends, they are not selfish.
> 
> And yes - Having children to not be alone in old age is something almost every parent I know has eventually mentioned to me. Well here's some news - - Not all children outlive their parents, and not all children would devote their lives to their elderly parents either.




Ok, I am getting a little tried of getting missqouted and people seeing the word selfish and jumping on it that I think people who don't have kids are selfish.  Please read the whole posts (there has been a number through out this thread before jumping to that.)    

My older brother and his wife have been trying to have children, unsucessfully.  He is also a epidemiologest (I can only hope I spelled that right)   and his lives work is dedicated to finding and testing a vacination for aids.  I was just talking to him about how  he may or may not ever produced a child with his gentic make up (what they would like) but his work may save countless lives that that is monunmental.  He mentioned that Abe Lincon never ended up having any decentents because his children died with out having child of there own, but he has a legacy that continues.   I could not agree more with your comments about that topic.

Sorry if I sounded snotty, I just am getting tried of people jumping on a word, with out reading the whole content of the statement.  I never said choosing not to have children is selfish, nor do I think it.    I don't think anyone on this thead has said that, so maybe it has been too civil and people need a devils adovate.


----------



## taswira

DisneyPhD said:
			
		

> Ok, I am getting a little tried of getting missqouted and people seeing the word selfish and jumping on it that I think people who don't have kids are selfish.


_Please_ forgive me if you misunderstood. My post was _not_ personally directed at you. The reason I quoted you was to cite your quote of others saying "_I don't want to give up my current life style where I am the center of my life and I enjoy it_." My comments were a general statement for everyone to ponder, _not_ a personal attck. I was not implying that _you_ think those choosing not to have children are selfish, but that there are many people who _do_.


----------



## DisneyPhD

taswira said:
			
		

> _Please_ forgive me if you misunderstood. My post was _not_ personally directed at you. The reason I quoted you was to cite your quote of others saying "_I don't want to give up my current life style where I am the center of my life and I enjoy it_." My comments were a general statement for everyone to ponder, _not_ a personal attck. I was not implying that _you_ think those choosing not to have children are selfish, but that there are many people who _do_.



sorry, I got a little bent out of joint.  People keep refering to it, and I just want to be clear that I don't think people who don't want kids are selfish.    It is hard to explain my fine line of it commonly being preceived as selfish often by others.


----------



## Disney  Doll

thelionqueen said:
			
		

> My little sidenote is, I believe the reason people keep asking is because having children is so completely wonderful, they "expect" other's would want them.


I will preface my remarks by saying that DH & I would have loved to have children, but we were unable to.

That being said, I have been acquainted with many children of varying ages which would lead me to believe that having children is not completely wonderful. It is a huge sacrifice, a great deal of work, a lot of time & effort, and, quite frankly, you don't know what the result will be!

The woman across the street from my DSIL who's son has been in & out of jail...I doubt she thinks it's completely wonderful.

My DSIL, who has 2 children we call the "Spawn of Satan"...and we are being kind...well, *she* may think having children is completely wonderful, but there is no one else in the world who has met her children who would agree.

The mother of the teenage girl who sneaks out every night to hang with the wrong crowd, fights with her mother, comes home pregnant...another vote for not completely wonderful.

I could go on and on, but you get my drift.

In any event, to the OP...your choices are yours (and your SO's) and no one else's. If all else fails, look the person in the eye and say "Do you have any idea how rude it is to comment upon or discuss my personal business? How about we discuss what your yearly income is instead, if we are all going to be sharing personal information?"

That tends to effectively shut people up.


----------



## WDWguru

Jumping into this thread a little late, but I must say it's nice to see, since the childfree check-in thread seems to have been derailed by those who don't get what that term means.

I knew from about 11 that I didn't want kids. I babysat once, aside from my sister, and hated it. While I love taking neices and nephews to WDW, I'm always very glad for them to go home when it's over (and grandparents always come along for help). 

Thought I always felt that way, about two years ago I sat down and just really thought it through. I had to search my soul and decide how I really felt. The conclusion I came to was that unless I really, truly, deeply wanted children, I shouldn't have them. I basically confirmed the feelings I already had. 

I'd much rather regret not having children than have children I regret.


----------



## Ride Junkie

I'm a little late on this thread too, but had to jump in.  I get that question a lot too.  My husband and I just got married in June, but we've been together 8 years.  The minute the ring goes on - BAM!  Then starts the baby inquisition.  People have no idea about your fertility, which could be very offensive to some.  In our case, we like being 'the kids' and being able to pack up & go on a trip whenever we want, without having to worry about child care.  We're still not planning to have any.  I've dragged two of my nieces along to Disneyland -- never again!!  It's exhausting enough when it's just the two of us!

When people ask me if we're having kids, I usually reply, "Nah, we're getting a dog instead."  This usually makes people laugh, and they tend to stop prying.


----------



## rigs32

If everyone is occupied raising the next generation, who's living life today?  

Anyone else planning to attend the No Kidding convention in Toronto next June?


----------



## WDWguru

An NK convention?! Details, please!  We don't have a chapter in our area -- shocking, I know, but there ARE some of us out here in Utah.


----------



## mamaprincess

This is a very interesting thread.  It is so rare for women not to feel pressured to have children.  So many women certainly don't need them.  It's refreshing to know that there are women who understand who they are and what is best for them as opposed to what looks right to everyone else.

My first pregnancy was twins.  My second, was a total surprise as we had taken measures to avoid pregnancy.  We will not be having anymore because we are in love with eachother.  We still want to date and absorb ourselves in eachother and the more children, the harder that is to do.  

We enjoy our girls, we adore them, we feel more blessed because of them but having them is not all roses all the time.  It's worrying more than you ever have, less money for pleasures , less sleep, less time for your own interest and eachother.  It's a supreme sacrifice that should only be undertaken by a woman who is truly ready and willing to take the full spectrum of motherhood on not by someone who is delusional. 

I think those who decide not to parent have a deep respect for what that role truly is.


----------



## wdwjunkie2005

Krissalee said:
			
		

> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!



I have not read this thread, except for the original post. I want to say CONGRATULATIONS for making up your mind and sticking to it. Who cares what others say? I know many people who've been married for years and have never had kids, and they don't regret their decision. Children need parent(s) who love and want them, not people who think they've got a quota to fill. Again, good for you!


----------



## Kris & Steve

_Just thought I would put my 2 cents in here.  

We are also in the minority, married & do not want kids...ever.  They aren't for me, I've never had the desire to be a Mom.  The thought of me being a mother makes my stomach hurt & that's not an exageration.  I like the nice life I have & kids will only disrupt it.  Is that selfish...sure, most definately but that's the way it goes.  We would never be able to have the nice life we have made for ourselves if we had children.  For as long as I can remember I have not wanted children.  I never babysat when I was younger, I never had cute names picked out, I never played "baby" when I was little.  Obviously the desire wasn't there many years ago either.  The only difference between us & a lot of posts on this board is that I do not even like kids, I mearly tolerate the ones I have too.  My sister is a pre-school teacher so obviusly she got all the "kid wanting" genes in family.

My biggest pet peeve with talking to people who ask why we don't have kids, etc. is, I get told the same thing over & over again.  I call it the infamous quote...you know how it goes..."You'll change you mind when you get older".  I'm 25, I'm not chaging my mind anytime soon.  I'm pretty sure my mind is 100% made up.  That PISSES   me off to no end when people say that to me.  And half the time it's people who don't even really know me, co-workers, neighbors, etc.  If anyone gives me a hard time about it I usually ramble off my list of pets (2 dogs, 7 cats, 2 parrots, 4 gerbils, a hermit crab & fish...lol) at home, I say those are my kids & it's true.  I treat them the same way that people treat their kids, sometimes even better.

Thanks for letting me vent!
_


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

Just a thought I had- married couples get the "why don't you want kids??" question, but if a homosexual couple *does* want kids they get the "why *do* you want kids?" question. 
The issues are somewhat related. Those who desperately want kids shouldn't be denied the opportunity and those who don't want them shouldn't be pressured. People shouldn't have kids just because it's the "next step" but because they really want them and are prepared for all the consequences both positive and negative. Waaaay too many neglected and unwanted children out there. It's not good any way you look at it. 
I was just thinking about a friend of mine- both he and his partner would love to adopt a child, but they live in the South and have been shamed strongly the few times they've mentioned it. They would be excellent parents, too. 
Just another spin on our topic . . .


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## nono

I loved being child-free.  Did so for a LONG time.  For me, what I finally realized is that I don't want to birth children...so we adopted.  It is a BIG change, and if you don't want children 110%, don't do it.  Those people who try to pressure you will not be there at 1 a.m. when you are alone with a screaming child who can't go to sleep.  _You_ will be...and it isn't fun!  Most of my friends are child-free, and we're all in our waning years of possibility, and it works great for them.  I don't ask them to live my life and we still have great friendships, as we value each others's choices and all still socialize regularly.

I still get asked if I'm "trying" all the time from non-friends...I guess to some people, children aren't really "yours" unless they are bio.  I feel bad for them for being so narrow-minded.  They're probably the same folks asking you guys about being child-free.  I always respond, "Are you asking me if I have s*x with my husband?"  That generally redirects the conversation!


----------



## Arielle22

DH and I were married 8 years before we decided to have our first dd. 2 years later we had our second and now we are done. 

My younger sister is 38 and has been married 6 years. She doesn't want children. I think it is the right choice for her. Oddly people will ask me why she doesn't have children. My response is that "She is devoted to her cats. She would step over a bleeding child to help a sick cat". That is the truth and it shuts the person up!


----------



## PrincessKitty

Kris & Steve said:
			
		

> _
> My biggest pet peeve with talking to people who ask why we don't have kids, etc. is, I get told the same thing over & over again.  I call it the infamous quote...you know how it goes..."You'll change you mind when you get older".  _



I always knew I didn't want kids, from the time I was about 5 years old.  I always got the "You'll change your mind" thing too.  Guess what, I'm 49 years old and I still haven't changed my mind!    But, I still know I could adopt or have foster kids if I wanted to.  There are thousands of kids who want homes (probably the children of people who had kids as the default   ).


----------



## WDWguru

I once heard a great response to the "you'll change your mind when you get older" statement. When that was unloaded, the person said back 
"So how many kids do you have?"
"Two."
"Don't worry, you'll change your mind when you get older."

Shut the person right up! I always have to wonder where that comes from, but even medical professionals do it. If you went to an OB/GYN at 25 and were pregnant, none of them would blink an eye or even suggest maybe you shouldn't be doing that, but go in at 25 and ask for a tubal and you're going to get the third degree and, depending on the doctor, an outright refusal. Having a child is just as - if not more - permanent as getting a tubal, AND it directly affects at least one other living being. So why the double standard?


----------



## wdwjunkie2005

LuluLovesDisney said:
			
		

> Just a thought I had- married couples get the "why don't you want kids??" question, but if a homosexual couple *does* want kids they get the "why *do* you want kids?" question.
> The issues are somewhat related. Those who desperately want kids shouldn't be denied the opportunity and those who don't want them shouldn't be pressured. People shouldn't have kids just because it's the "next step" but because they really want them and are prepared for all the consequences both positive and negative. Waaaay too many neglected and unwanted children out there. It's not good any way you look at it.
> I was just thinking about a friend of mine- both he and his partner would love to adopt a child, but they live in the South and have been shamed strongly the few times they've mentioned it. They would be excellent parents, too.
> Just another spin on our topic . . .


My DW and I (I am also a woman) tell people we would like to have kids, and people are genuinely surprised that we do. They seem to think it's not possible. Also, many people believe that the only reason to get married is to have children, but what about octogenarians who marry? Are they going to be giving birth anytime soon?


----------



## Kris & Steve

I'm deleting my response as I don't want to cause issues on the board...even though they are just opinions.  I realize now I should have never strayed from the topic of these boards which is WDW.


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## luckey-lasvegas

Even if you did have a child people would still continue to ask questions. My Dh and I decided before we got married that "if" we had children that we would only have one. We felt we would rather be able to give one evreything we could than to scimp and spread the wealth around so to speak. Well our DD will be 9 in December DH and I have been married for 14 1/2 years I'm 40 and he's 51 and STILL people ask aren't you going to have another ? Then they try to guilt you into it by telling us how lonely she'll be when were gone.
I always answer after you .......


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## Magalex

It doesn't stop at one child like someone else said. Our 5 yr old DS is a happy social child. We get the poor only one child theory sometimes. But we all those factors of life mentioned(finance, futures, health). We are very happy with our DS. He is our world. Now we get why don't you get a dog? Children you can potty train.


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## SheDaisy0088

My best friend and I are at opposite ends of the spectrum. She is 45 and has never wanted children. I respect her wishes and we even have a good laugh about it.

I on the other hand have a wonderful DS8. I never thought I wanted children. Wasn't trying and was terrified when I realized I was pregnant. SO many thoughts went thru my mind. In the end, it was worth it when I held him for the first time. That being said it is a ton of work. I applaude all of you who know that you do not want children!! I work as a paralegal in Family Law and have seen first hand the effects of children being born into familes that would have been better off not having children. I think that deciding not to have children is probably the most selfless thing you can do. You realize that it isn't for you and if other's can't accept that then that is too bad for them. Not everyone is cut out to be a parent. 

I also get tired of people asking when am I going to have a brother or sister for my son. I tell them that I am not planning on it and that DH got "fixed"!! That shuts them up then...LOL!! 

Just my .02 cents for what it's worth.


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## TDC Nala

I ducked out of this thread because it was meant for married persons to answer and I'm not. I should have stayed out of it to start with.

But, good grief, would people really step over an injured child to help a cat? Wow.

I'll go back into my hole under the rock now.


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## Limmer

I have to agree with the general consensus that people are just rude in general.  I was very pregnant (just about to pop) when I had a customer at work ask me 
1)if I was pregnant - what if I wasn't? and 
2)if it was planned.  
Though every part of me was screaming for me to answer  "planned?  are you kidding lady; I don't even know who the father IS!" I was at work so I said "yes" very shortly and walked away.  Luckily I have a great boss who told her she was very rude and she walked away in a huff because WE insulted HER!


----------



## JDarling

nono said:
			
		

> I still get asked if I'm "trying" all the time from non-friends...I guess to some people, children aren't really "yours" unless they are bio.  I feel bad for them for being so narrow-minded.  They're probably the same folks asking you guys about being child-free.  I always respond, "Are you asking me if I have s*x with my husband?"  That generally redirects the conversation!



From an adopted kid - THANK YOU! My parents couldn't have kids, so they adopted my brother and I.  We're closer than many of the blood related families I know, believe it or not. 

As for me and my DH, we're batting around the kid idea. Some days I think " Yeah, I could do that" and other days I feel "Gah! I'm so glad I don't have kids!" I feel like if my heart is not in it 110%, then it wouldn't be fair to go for it.  I'm 25 and my DH is 29, and he's feeling the itch a bit, but I was very clear when I married him that I married him to be his wife - to be with him. Not to have kids. And he's cool with whatever we end up doing. 

Right now - the furkids are all I can handle (2 cats and a boxer dog).


----------



## Kris & Steve

I'm deleting my response as I don't want to cause issues on the board...even though they are just opinions.  I realize now I should have never strayed from the topic of these boards which is WDW.


----------



## DisneyPhD

TDC Nala said:
			
		

> I ducked out of this thread because it was meant for married persons to answer and I'm not. I should have stayed out of it to start with.
> 
> But, good grief, would people really step over an injured child to help a cat? Wow.
> 
> I'll go back into my hole under the rock now.



Me too.  I am leaving now also.  Compasion is for all living souls, I amsume children would be included in that.


----------



## Kris & Steve

I'm deleting my response as I don't want to cause issues on the board...even though they are just opinions.  I realize now I should have never strayed from the topic of these boards which is WDW.


----------



## lookingforward

I did not actually believe that someone would ever step over a child for an animal, I am sure the poster who wrote that was just kidding. The love of animals is very strong but I did not take the comment literally. I used to have a schnauzer before I had a husband or kids and at the time I considered her a family member. She lived for 14 years and watched me bring home three babies, she moved to Japan with us, etc. She was the perfect dog. I would have done anything for her and I used to joke that she was my child. I would have paid thousands to extend her life, i would have given her my own blood if it would have helped. She has been gone for four years and I still cry when I see her pictures. But I know that even though I loved her with all my heart I would have helped a bleeding child before her. I understood the concept the poster was trying to get across.  I hope the poster who wrote that does not get scared away from posting her opinions, thoughts and ideas. This thread had remained so open and friendly....


----------



## funcinderella

I haven't read all of these posts, but here's my two cents.

Don't assume that just because you're not a "kid person" regarding _other people's_ children, that you wouldn't be a kid person when it came to your _own _children.

That's kinda me. I always knew I wanted my own children, but I'm really not that great with other people's kids. Not that I hate them or dislike them or anything like that, but I was always somewhat indifferent. You can't really extrapolate your feelings about other people's kids onto what you would feel about your own.

Of course I think Im great with my own kids.  I hope they think so too!


----------



## PrincessKitty

funcinderella said:
			
		

> I haven't read all of these posts, but here's my two cents.
> 
> Don't assume that just because you're not a "kid person" regarding _other people's_ children, that you wouldn't be a kid person when it came to your _own _children.



It could be even worse, though, for a person who is not a "kid person" for other people's kids to assume they WOULD be a "kid person" for their own kids....and then not be a "kid person" for their own kids either!  This happens way too often.  As a pediatric nurse I have seen way too much of the abuse, neglect, and plain old indifference that people can perpetrate on their own children.  People should listen to their own hearts about whether or not they want children, and not just do it because our biology is set up to have children.


----------



## ChisJo

> She would step over a bleeding child to help a sick cat



I just had to comment on this. I don't think if anyone was put in this situation would they literally neglect a fellow human being. But, it brings to mind a story from a couple of years ago (not relating to OP).

In our city newspaper, there was an article about a women who burned her dog in scalding hot water and how the courts dealt with it. This caused a major controversy in our city and people were irate! They couldn't believe this women was allowed to ever have pets ever again. Right _beside_ that same article was an article about a murder in the city, and on the next page was an article about a car accident death. Didn't even faze on people those deaths. 

My best friend is not a kid person. She has her own charity organization to help stray animals in our city. She literally hates children - always has, always will. I really have to wonder if she would step over a bleeding child to help a cat - it's just the way she is. Put her in the situation though, she might change her mind. Some people were born to be parents, others were not. She is one of those, and so am I.

Jo


----------



## julieannbabe

ChisJo said:
			
		

> Although I am not married, I already know that I am not going to have children. I know that I am too selfish have them. I enjoy MY time and MY freedom. I cannot see me pregnant - it would hamper my lifestyle. I enjoy travelling and spontaneity and my own money. I am an aunt with 8 neices and nephews, and spending time with them is seriously my form of birth control. I have 2 cats, that I can leave for hours at a time, with food and water, and they are happy. They are even happier when I get home. They never cry at 3am and they don't interrupt my sleep. They love sleeping at my feet. I change their litter once a week, not 8 times a day.
> Please don't get me wrong - I love children, just not the lifestyle of a parent. I have a job that will allow me to travel the world, and that is exactly what I plan on doing. In doing so, I plan on seeing what the world has to offer. This would not make sense if a child was in the picture. I have met someone in the same profession who wants to do the same.
> Additionally, in my experiences with my closest friends who have children, I cannot see me settling down like that. I don't see it as a happy time. It puts strain on their marriages, their finances and their personal freedom. Call me selfish, but it's my choice.
> As for what others say to you, they don't realize how rude they are being. What if you were unable to have children, but really wanted them? How would they feel then, asking you those same questions? Is it our duty to populate an already over-populated world? I just don't understand why others need to impose in our business and our desire to want and not to want children.
> If people ask me why I don't want/have children, I just tell them that it is my/our personal business. If they persist, ask them a personal question that you know they don't want to ask, just to get the message across. Asking someone about their lifestyle choice is very rude, and in doing so, cross a boundary they shouldn't cross in the first place. I know it gets to be annoying, I go through it too. I just tell people to back off, or the conversation and visit is over. But, I am quite assertive.
> Good luck,
> Jo



i enjoyed reading your post.

xjx


----------



## Asuneda

When people ask when you're going to have children or why you haven't had any, just burst into tears and ask them "how can you be so insensitive?" They won't know what hit them...they also won't probe any further.


----------



## funcinderella

PrincessKitty said:
			
		

> It could be even worse, though, for a person who is not a "kid person" for other people's kids to assume they WOULD be a "kid person" for their own kids....and then not be a "kid person" for their own kids either! This happens way too often. As a pediatric nurse I have seen way too much of the abuse, neglect, and plain old indifference that people can perpetrate on their own children. People should listen to their own hearts about whether or not they want children, and not just do it because our biology is set up to have children.


 
Good point; it's hard for me to comprehend how people could be like that but obviously some are.I knew I wanted my own kids, and that mothering instinct kicked in immediately once they were born, just like I knew it would.  I guess it takes some deep soul-searching to figure that out.


----------



## my4kids

soooo...here's my 2 cents...

You're right - you absolutely should not have kids if you are that selfish.
Kudos to you!  - I see so many people that have kids (even desparately try every procedure to conceive) just because they think it fits into what they want for THEIR life. You should not have kids if you think it will make YOU complete.  It is all about wanting to make that new little life complete.  My S-IL tried everything to conceive her child and it is the strangest thing....she treats it like a little accessory - like a prop to make her look like a perfect mother....the kid is always dressed to a tee, but not because she enjoys doing something for the kid, but because she thinks it makes her look good.  "Don't I look like a cute Mommy with this perfectly dressed child?"...meanwhile, the kid is with a Nanny almost 24-7 and can't read in second grade because noone cares enough about her to read to her. 

If you are happy just loving your husband and don't have a desparate desire to love a little on too - then for God sake don't !!!

Of course....I really hate when people go and do something permanent about it at a young age.....often I see people 40 yrs old trying to reverse this because all of the sudden they realize what they have compared to others with kids is a little empty...they stop thinking about trips and work and think about who will visit them in the old age home....


----------



## WDWguru

my4kids said:
			
		

> Of course....I really hate when people go and do something permanent about it at a young age.....often I see people 40 yrs old trying to reverse this because all of the sudden they realize what they have compared to others with kids is a little empty...



Having a child at that same "young age" is just as permanent and directly impacts another life. I'd much rather regret having a tubal at 25 than having a child at 25. Also, studies have shown that the rate of reversal in people who were sterilized without having any children is almost zero. It's almost entirely those who had children and thought they were done, then changed their minds. 

Don't fool yourself into thinking childfree lives are empty. Many of us volunteer with our extra time, work with children or the elderly or needy. Some devote themselves to important research and incredibly demanding jobs that contribute much to society. We pay more than our share in taxes for the good of society as a whole. However, just as not all childfree people contribute to society, not every child is a contribution to society. Ted Bundy was somebody's child, after all.



> ...they stop thinking about trips and work and think about who will visit them in the old age home....



Having children is no guarantee you'll be taken care of when you're old (and a selfish reason to have them, imho). My mother in law and my step mother both work in nursing homes. It's sad, but those that are visited regularly by their children are a small minority.

Sorry for the soap box moment there, but I get tired of hearing the same "reasoning" over and over again.


----------



## lookingforward

Most people who have tubal ligations do so after having children. Medical professionals hesitate and sometime refuse to do them on young childless women. Ethics do play a part, because no matter how small the percentage..there are those who regret the procedure (both with and without children) which is most likely permanent.  Counseling in such an intregal part of the surgery. People do change their minds, for sure. I had one after my third child and regretted it for a few years. Now, I am relieved. Funny how time changes your perspective. 

My friend was in an unhappy marriage and had her husband have a vasectomy (she had no children with him and neither wanted any). They even had some of his sperm frozen in case they changed their minds. After trying to make it work they divorced. She remarried a man with no children and was able to have one with him. Her ex remarried and was also able to have another child with what he banked. They had options, which is never a bad thing.

As far as empty lives, well, I have never met anyone childfree by choice who led an empty existence, they all seemed very happy and content.
Only those people who don't have what they want are unhappy. There is a truth to waiting too long, many of my college friends who put off motherhood (those that wanted children but waited for one reason or another) are having great difficulty in conceiving in their 40's and that is painful.

As for the nursing home issue, I have to give my opinion. The amount of elderly in nursing homes is a small percetage of their peers. Most elderly live in retirement communities or private homes. There are both sides, but having been a social worker for the elderly...MOST of them who are parents have the love and support (financial or emotional) of their children. Yes, being a parent is no quarantee for old age, but it does add a measure of support and love to most elders lives. We hear of the children who ignore their parents because those elders are usually left alone and vulnerable and thus come to our attention more often. You don't tend to hear about the loving support and attention that most of us give to our elderly parents.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

WDWguru said:
			
		

> Having a child at that same "young age" is just as permanent and directly impacts another life. I'd much rather regret having a tubal at 25 than having a child at 25. Also, studies have shown that the rate of reversal in people who were sterilized without having any children is almost zero. It's almost entirely those who had children and thought they were done, then changed their minds.
> 
> Don't fool yourself into thinking childfree lives are empty. Many of us volunteer with our extra time, work with children or the elderly or needy. Some devote themselves to important research and incredibly demanding jobs that contribute much to society. We pay more than our share in taxes for the good of society as a whole. However, just as not all childfree people contribute to society, not every child is a contribution to society. Ted Bundy was somebody's child, after all.
> 
> 
> 
> Having children is no guarantee you'll be taken care of when you're old (and a selfish reason to have them, imho). My mother in law and my step mother both work in nursing homes. It's sad, but those that are visited regularly by their children are a small minority.
> 
> Sorry for the soap box moment there, but I get tired of hearing the same "reasoning" over and over again.



I totally agree!


----------



## kpk89

I have very much enjoyed reading this thread -- not often you can read something with 2 points of view where people feel so strongly and have it not get ugly.  

I'm a mom of 3, was married 5 years before the first was born, and listened to a lot of the "when ... when WHEN?" stuff.   It becomes tiring.  Having had 3, and considering more, I would anticipate a lot of "Why so many ??" Similar level of personal-ness and intrusiveness.  

I have found that a great response for any question that you don't feel like answering is, "What an interesting question!  Why do you ask?"   It sorta throws people off.     

Anyway, I am glad that there are people who know themselves enough to realize they don't want kids.  Children are not a prerequisite for a happy and fulfilling life (well turns out they are for me, but that's me!)


----------



## my4kids

- you can tell from my member name that I am on that other side of it where I get just as disturbing questions about "why so many?'

People are constantly saying horrible things to me like "Haven't you heard of birth control?"  You do know about birth control, don't you?"  "I assume you are Catholic"  When I announced I was having my 4th - the most popular response was "Are you crazy?" I also hear "You are done now right?"  I really hate it when feel as if they need to save me from myself and "teach" me something like when they say " now listen- you can't have any more now - it's too much"   I have learned that people want you to play into their criticism....they think if they said it jokingly or laughingly I will bashfully say "yeah - I guess I am crazy"  I used to actually do this - and then I would feel like I betrayed my kids - because I desparately wanted each of them....now I have learned to look them square in the eye with an insulted and stern look and say " yes- I do know all about birth control - why do you ask?"  or "No. I'm not crazy, when did it become socially acceptable to ask someone that?"  When they say "Are you done now?" I say "That would be something that I would discuss with my husband and no anyone else." 

You know whats right for you- don't worry what others think....

In regards to the comment "I rather regret a tubal ligation than a child at age 25"  -- gee that is a pretty broad statement...I had an unplanned child at age 25 and, gee, i just can't imagine regretting him....especially at age 25 - I can understand regretting PREGNANCY at 16 or 18 (not a child though) but 25 - you're already an adult - get over it.  I took it as "OK changing gears now - plan B is now in effect"  It was definately God showing me he had a better plan for me than I did....everything was so much greater after I had him.


----------



## OhDonna

To those of us that have had 1 child, people once asked "when are you having another".  "Never" I answered and they laughed     as though I was joking-I wasn't.  I happened to like my work.  My 1 is now a 24 yr old and guess what, they don't ask anymore  Now they ask if I want grandchildren.


----------



## WDWguru

my4kids said:
			
		

> In regards to the comment "I rather regret a tubal ligation than a child at age 25"  -- gee that is a pretty broad statement...I had an unplanned child at age 25 and, gee, i just can't imagine regretting him....especially at age 25 - I can understand regretting PREGNANCY at 16 or 18 (not a child though) but 25 - you're already an adult - get over it.  I took it as "OK changing gears now - plan B is now in effect"  It was definately God showing me he had a better plan for me than I did....everything was so much greater after I had him.




My point was that if I were going to regret one or the other, it's better to regret the action than the human being and all the consequences that brings upon an innocent life.

Unfortunately, there are more than a few children born to people who regret having them. It may not be outright admitted, but based on how many children are treated as unwanted, it's a sad fact. Dear Abby did a famous column many years ago asking parents if they had it to do over again, would they have kids. Nearly three quarters said no. I find that shocking and sad. Plenty of people have children by accident or because it's the default and don't give any more thought to it that what shirt they put on that morning. And it's obvious from results that not everyone has the change of heart you did. Personally, knowing myself and my own feelings, I would not want to risk it. 

My point was simply how horrible it would be for that child to be unwanted and uncared for -- for ANY child to be unwanted and uncared for. It simply shouldn't happen.


----------



## taswira

my4kids said:
			
		

> You're right - you absolutely should not have kids if you are that *selfish*.


----------



## my4kids

ChisJo said:
			
		

> Although I am not married, I already know that I am not going to have children. I know that I am too selfish have them. I enjoy MY time and MY freedom. I cannot see me pregnant - it would hamper my lifestyle. I enjoy travelling and spontaneity and my own money.
> Jo




My "selfish" comment was in direct response to the above , not to the original poster....(well it was also directed at the DISer who said her sister would step over a bleeding child to help a sick cat - yuck) .Sorry I did not make that clear - if you are reading the board in a linear view you can not tell who I was responding to. 

But hey, I appreciate the faces and not the words - I think if that had been verbalized, my computer would have spontaneously combusted.


----------



## taswira

my4kids said:
			
		

> My "selfish" comment was in direct response to the above , not to the original poster.....Sorry I did not make that clear - if you are reading the board in a linear view you can not tell who I was responding to.


Yes, there had been a few posts since the one you were responding to, so I took the comment as a general one since you didn't quote anyone in that particular post. Sorry.

My overall belief: I have found that many "childless by choice" people who proclaim themselves as "selfish" because they enjoy their own time and freedom are often the ones who give their time and efforts generously to others when needed, especially as they get older. They just don't often broadcast their good deeds. I will always believe that whether a couple chooses to "raise a family" or not does not determine the state of their generosity, goodness, or badness. There are just as many "selfish" people with children as without. And as one poster implied, a person's unselfish contribution to society (if getting pregnant can be called "unselfish") might be the next Ted Bundy.

This world will always need children, but with excessive over-population on this already over-crowded planet, it is also beneficial to the world for many of us to choose to be child-free. We all have our purpose here.


----------



## lookingforward

I just read a story about a 39 year old women in Arkansas that just had her 16th natural child. And she and her husband say they are not done. WOW! She had her first at 21, so that means almost every year she has been pregnant.


----------



## WillCAD

lookingforward said:
			
		

> I just read a story about a 39 year old women in Arkansas that just had her 16th natural child. And she and her husband say they are not done. WOW! She had her first at 21, so that means almost every year she has been pregnant.



They must be mighty rich to be able to afford so many kids.


----------



## lookingforward

I saw a documentary on them and they are not rich, just organized. The girls all wear the same long dresses, the boys the same uniform. The family divides up all the work and they are building, by hand, a large home with dorm like rooms for the kids. I think they are in a community or group that has as many kids as God will give them. The girls sew and clean, the boys build, etc. They have religious reasons for such a large family. It should be interesting, as time goes by, to see how the kids grow up. Will they live the same lifestyle? Will they move away? I am tired with 3 kids, I can't imagine having 13 more.


----------



## grlzmom

I certainly dont think that choosing not to have children should be equated with being "selfish".  And, choosing to have them doesnt equate with being selfless.

I also think its nobodys business if/when/why and how you decide or decide not to start a family.

As a mom of SEVEN (6 beautiful daughters, one bouncy boy), I know what it is like to be tormented by family and friends about things that are really none of their business.

My dh is the only one in his family that has children.  His brother by choice decided not to have them and they are extremely generous and giving to others in need (no way can you call them selfish), constantly volunteering.  They are very happy with their lifestyle.
His sister has been unable to have children and I know they both get sick and tired of their friends bugging them about their choices. Their favorite reply when asked about when they are going to start a family is to tell everyone that their selfish brother and sister in law (me and dh) have already used up the 2.2 kids allotment for the whole family


----------



## Kris & Steve

Ohhhhh, nevermind...sorry


----------



## gppnj

Krissalee said:
			
		

> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!



The planet's population just keeps getting exponentially larger. Meanwhile, the planet isn't getting any bigger, and our natural resources aren't getting any more abundant. If more people thought the way you did, this world would be a much better place.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

gppnj said:
			
		

> The planet's population just keeps getting exponentially larger. Meanwhile, te planet isn't getting any bigger, and our natural resources aren't getting any more abundant. If more people thought the way you did, this word would be a much better place.



I totally agree. If everyone had kids, the world would be overrun and overpopulated. If no one had kids, there would be no more population. I guess it's a wonderful thing people have different feelings on this topic. As long as those who choose to have them want them and treat them well.


----------



## ChisJo

my4kids said:
			
		

> My "selfish" comment was in direct response to the above , not to the original poster....(well it was also directed at the DISer who said her sister would step over a bleeding child to help a sick cat - yuck) .Sorry I did not make that clear - if you are reading the board in a linear view you can not tell who I was responding to.
> 
> But hey, I appreciate the faces and not the words - I think if that had been verbalized, my computer would have spontaneously combusted.



Currently, my time is divied up between my school (40+ hours per week of class), homework, 2 jobs, friends, and my huge family (8+ neices and nephews, 5 older siblings and a disabled father). When I get sleep, I literally pass out and don't wake up until that alarm is buzzing at 5:30. When I am done school (14 months!!!), I will be almost 30 and a registered nurse who plans on travelling and doing humanitarian work in third world countries. I have wanted to do this for years. I ended a relationship because of this (he didn't want to do this). Having a child in this plan doesn't really work. Therefore, my time and my money are important in accomplishing this dream. Being pregnant would definately hamper this lifestyle decision. Is it selfish? Maybe. I don't really know. I am selfish in that only I think about my time and my future, and currently, that future doesn't have children in it. I don't think it ever will....


----------



## Inga

Wow, I never thought that I would dare to enter into this conversation...but, after reading the last dozen postings, I thought, what the heck!

I come from a French-Canadian strict Roman Catholic background.  My parents each have 7+ siblings, my parents had 5 children.  I have 11 nieces and nephews.  My DH and I (married for 13 years next June) do not have children and have made the decision at this time to remain childless (who knows, if the hormones kick in in our 40's, adoption might be an option).  

I see my couple and single friends with and without kids, and I am just not convinced that having children is a guaranteed path to happiness.  Some of them are overjoyed, some of them are miserable.  Some of them would love to be in my position (happily married, no kids) and others can't quite understand whether our neurons are firing:  "You just don't know what you are missing", "Of course you will have kids, you'll see".  

My parents are relieved that we are not having children (less for them to worry about, they have enough grandkids as it is) which may sound harsh but I know it is true.  So there is no pressure from that side.  My DH's parents have pretty well given up on us...

There is alot of societal pressure on us...probably less now than in our 20's as most of our friends have given up and kind of see us as amusing (in a nice way), we're unique.  I think the most important thing to do is take stock in your life, and decide individually what is right for you, for whatever reason.  I don't like to think I am selfish to not have kids as there are SOME people who do many things, such as having kids, for reasons beyond the love of  a child and could be considered selfish behaviour.  Deciding to have or not have kids CAN be a selfish act, but recognizing whether you want to commit to a lifetime of being a parent before having kids and deciding that that component of life is not something you are particularily interested in, is not a selfish thing to do.  It's good planning and judgement.

I would love to use the whole 'planet overpopulation' excuse, but I can't really buy that.  Yes, in India and China, there are issues.  But here in North America, we are going to have serious labour shortages with the Baby Boomers getting older and us Generation Xers having less than our 2.1 kids.  We will not have the health human resources to manage these aging Boomers.  So I can't really get on that soapbox.

I am a very happy, happily-married women, I have a dog to lather my love upon, and have a job within the health care field that I feel is meaningful to many people.  I am a good person, and I love my family.  Life is good!  Would having a baby make it better?  I don't know.  Who really could predict it?  It could be a disaster or the most wonderful experience in my life! Is it a risk to either take the chance or not take the chance? Absolutely.  There are risks to either decision.  

Ah, my two cents...

Inga


----------



## NeverlandClub23

Is anyone else looking as much forward to the holiday family get togethers in the next month or two? While I love being around my family (I have a ton of aunts, uncles, and cousins) that's when the questions really start. It's considered almost insanity if you're not popping out three kids by the time you're 21. So I'm starting my usual warm-ups of "No we've decided not to have children any time soon or maybe ever" and the "No thanks, I would rather not hold your child to see how well I handle kids" (For some reason all of my cousins pass their kids off to me thinking that I'll change my mind when they're sitting in my lap   ). Oh well, maybe I'll just hang out by the dessert table and eat pie all night and then I can't even talk if my mouth is full.


----------



## NeverlandClub23

Also I had one of my co-workers say the other day (as we were discussing not having children-she has two) "Some people shouldn't have kids. They know they wouldn't be good mothers." What?! This was really irritating. Just because I don't want children doesn't mean if I did have them that I wouldn't be a good mother. And I thought this was pretty funny too, another co-worker said "You really should have kids because of all of the people out there that aren't able to have children. God's giving you that gift" So I said "Basically you're saying I should have kids just because other people can't?" and she said "Yes". I gave up then. I figured I'd just keep my childless lifestyle to myself.


----------



## Gillian

I'm at that age (mid-late 30s) where my friends have varied lifestyles. I have learned that we've made and continue to make choices for different reasons and that they are all valid. 

A lot of my friends have 3 kids and have been criticized for it (to their faces). And some of them want more, even though friends, family and total strangers assume "they are done."  I never imagined that these comments would hurt, but they do.

I have a friend with one child who does not want any more. I'm an only child and would never want that for my family, but he's an only too and chose it for his. 

It's a good topic to discuss, because unless you hear the other side(s) of the story, you can't understand how someone else feels. 

Thanks for sharing all of your stories! I hope it makes me more open minded.


----------



## WillCAD

NeverlandClub23 said:
			
		

> And I thought this was pretty funny too, another co-worker said "You really should have kids because of all of the people out there that aren't able to have children. God's giving you that gift" So I said "Basically you're saying I should have kids just because other people can't?" and she said "Yes". I gave up then. I figured I'd just keep my childless lifestyle to myself.



Oh, religious arguements are so much fun!

Point out to this person that "God also gave me the most precious gift of all - free will to make up my own mind about how to live my life. Just because I CAN do something doesn;t mean I SHOULD."


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

WillCAD said:
			
		

> Oh, religious arguements are so much fun!
> 
> Point out to this person that "God also gave me the most precious gift of all - free will to make up my own mind about how to live my life. Just because I CAN do something doesn;t mean I SHOULD."



Will, you would be so handy to  have around! When in a situation like that I rarely think quickly enough to put my feelings into words like that.


----------



## WillCAD

LuluLovesDisney said:
			
		

> Will, you would be so handy to  have around! When in a situation like that I rarely think quickly enough to put my feelings into words like that.



Don't give it a thought, Lulu.

No matter how elequently or precisely you might express your thoughts on religious or "moral" topics, nobody ever changes their minds.

The best way is usually to just walk away instead of trying to convince anybody of anything.


----------



## Vivianne

After 19 years of marriage I'm beyond being bothered when someone asks me if we have children.  I just say "no" and smile.  I've never had someone say we're selfish or otherwise.  

Actually, I'm surprised at some responses.  I've gotten the "good for you", "I love my children but I think not having them would have been better".     Perhaps, it's because they're stressed out since some of their children are in the teenage years.  It's not easy to raise children in our society and I admire parents that sacrifice for their children.  Especially those who choose to adopt.  I know a couple that adopted three siblings from Russia that had emotional problems because their birth mother was an alcoholic and abandoned them. They were going to be placed separately but this couple agreed to take them all.  The adoptive parents are great people.


----------



## CJK

Wow - thanks so much for all your responses to this thread.  I bookmarked this thread a few months ago and just got around to reading (half of it so far) today!  It's so thought-provoking and gives me some hope knowing that we're not alone.  Dh and I are 32, married 7yrs and are still on the fence about kids.  People have given up on us in general so the questions have stopped.  Wouldn't they be surprised if I tell them someday that I'm pregnant!   Thanks for all the insight.  Everyone has the right to privacy in whatever their decisions may be!


----------



## MrsTink04

We WANT children and the "when are you going to have children?" questions irritate me.  Umm...we're TRYING!!!  We can't MAKE it happen!!!


My Neice-by-marriage had a little boy (oops pregnancy) and has NOTHING to do with him (neither does the father), but will not legally give him up.  We all love him dearly and our lives have been brightened by his presence.  With that said, I completely agree with the posters that have said it is a mature decision to know that you do not want children and to take every precaution against them.  Children are certainly a blessing if they are wanted, but they should be wanted...


----------



## Terk-1

A decision whether or not to have children is completely up to you and no one else.  Although I am not yet married, I know I do not wish to have children.  I have nieces and nephews that I love and I enjoy being an aunt.  I know several people who have decided not to have children and I respect their decisions, as much as I do those who want or have children.  Not everyone is meant or wants to be a parent and I think their wishes either way should be respected.  If you love one another and feel that you are happy with life being just the two of you, then good for you.


----------



## ashresiren

Hubby and I have 2 nephews that we've practically raised since childhood (we were high school sweethearts).  We've decided that nephews and nieces don't really take the place of children though--can't spank them!!! =0)  Seriously, though, hubby has been dying to have kids since we were 17--so I guess it just depends on the dynamics of your relationship.  You shouldn't have them if you're not POSITIVE you want them--hence the 2 nephews who have invaded our Disney trips since the beginning of time.  On a slightly different subject, hubby always says that people who don't like children can't be trusted.  Not people who don't want kids, people who don't like kids.   I tend to agree.


----------



## MouseWorshipin

I have a situation (non-pregnancy related, but similarly personal) that people like to pester me about.  For years I have been answering the first question, "No, and you wouldn't believe how many people are rude enough to bug me with questions about it."  

That usually stops them before they start.  If it doesn't, I just say jokingly, "C'mon, don't make me add you to that list!"

Only one time did a guy continue with it, and luckily there was another guy there to tell him to shut up.


----------



## hauntedmansion

Been married for 6 years. When we first got married we were asked very often. Now it's slowed down a little bit. Did you ever notice it's always people who have children who ask. My answer now is "don't drag me into your misery." I get some strange looks.


----------



## taswira

hauntedmansion said:
			
		

> My answer now is "don't drag me into your misery." I get some strange looks.


I'll have to remember that one!


----------



## 2vets

Lulu (and everyone else) -  

I am almost 37, and my husband is 33.  

I am a cancer survivor, had breast cancer at 33.  Many younger breast cancer survivors are recommended not to get pregnant after treatment (assuming they still can - chemo can wreak havoc on your body, and some patients take drugs after chemo that puts them into early menopause), as breast cancers are often hormonally responsive.  My tumor wass not, but my oncologist still said, "It would be best if you didn't have kids for a minimum of 2 years, at least 5 preferably...and you might want to think about NOT having them."  

Many other young survivors I know mourned terribly, planning adoption or embryo freezing prior to treatment.  I felt relief.  I'll admit it - the thought that came first to my mind was, "Oh, thank God, the pressure is off me FOREVER."  

I was unhappily married at the time of "the b**b", as I call it, actually filed for divorce during treatment, but I am remarried now ( 3 years later) and couldn't be happier.  I love my husband so much that we have had many talks about this.  The big thing is, I love him so much that I WOULD have a kid with him.  It is just that the kid part isn't appealing.  What is appealing is having a child with him and making everyone else so overjoyed.  But that isn't good enough - unless the KID becomes appealing, I don't think it's right.  

We have not decided NO, forever. No is for now.  We have scheduled talks about it for after each big trip that we take, but so far, we are very happy the way we are. I predict that we will stay child-free, though if either of us has a big change of heart, you never know.  My brother and SIL are pregnant with our first nephew now, so that will probably be a big help in our decision!

I am lucky, because I can shut people up with one sentence about "my oncologist" - but just remember - this is your decision and no one else's.  It feels uncomfortable to answer the questions of people who just want you to share the joy they feel (without thinking that different things bring joy to different people!!), but it would feel a lot more uncomfortable to do something that deep in your heart, you are ambivilent about.

And I'll end this with a fun and unrelated story since I just told ya'll about the cancer thing and we're on a Disney board - I went to WDW during chemo for a weekend when I was feeling good.  The stares I got, OMG!!!  Nearly everyone who looked at me smiled or looked away immediately.  The kids were kids, asked their parents what was wrong with my hair, why I was bald, all that stuff.   But in the MK one day there was a grown man who literally stopped in his tracks and stared with his big ol' trap open - his kid was actually pulling on him ("dad, come ON!!!").  I smiled sweetly and asked him laughingly if he wanted to take a picture, as that would last longer!!  Poor guy, he stammered..and I just told him not to worry, I was doing OK and my hair would all grow back, and why should I deny myself a trip to Disney - look at all the bald guys around!!!    I do have a picture of me with Mickey from that trip - Mickey's hand on top of my scarved head - it is on my refrigerator so I remember never to whine about having a bad hair day again...


----------



## Pea-n-Me

2vets, congratulations on your cancer survival.    LOL at your WDW story, I also did the Disney Cruise just after treatment ended - I had a little bit of hair growing in and was kind of    but my Dis friends from that cruise put me completely at ease and were jealous I didn't have to deal with the "windblown look".   

Why don't you stop by Dis Breast Cancer Survivors   and say hello.


----------



## 2vets

Things you didn't know existed!!!  I will stop by and say hello, absolutely.  I had no idea there were enough of us here to have our own forum!

Isn't that funny about your hair?  As far as I'm concerned, there is nothing more lovely than a woman post-chemo with very short hair...and that "Bring it on!!!!" look in their eyes!

Now that my hair is shoulder-length again, I miss my 2 cm long 'do!!  You know, I met my current husband with about 1 cm of hair - he thought I was just trying to look French.  I'm serious.


----------



## RC Fan

I think you will find that most if not all of us who are child-free by choice have put a great deal of thought into our decision.  Wouldn't it be nice if everyone HAD to put a great deal of thought into having a baby?


----------



## hmp2z

I'm a teacher, so I always say, "Have kids?!? I've got 80 already; I don't think I could handle any more!"  
I'm 29 & DH is 30, and he is, most definitely, not a fan of children in any form.  I like children, in limited doses, and I like to be able to send them home to their biological parents at the end of the day   Having children would put a cramp in our style in so many ways: our plans for a house, our dogs (one of whom shares my husband's antipathy for children), my volunteer work, our FREEDOM - blessed freedom!
I definitely get my fair share of children at work, and probably some other people's share, too!    DH & I love going to WDW as a couple, and we don't feel silly there at all.  For us, WDW is more of a romantic place, possibly since I didn't go until I was an adult, and it just epitomizes movie-quality glitter & romance to us both (hence our WDW wedding).
Cheers!
Heather W


----------



## java

Hey having kids is not for everyone and I applaud those of you that know you don't have it in you. I have four children and could not imagine life without them- I get the "are they all yours" comment. So no kids -too many kids some people are going to be judgmental no matter what you do. Live the life that makes you happy. When I see one of my children get to live their dreams...it is a happiness I can not even put into words. But again it is a happiness that I feel and I know that not all people would get joy in that manner. 
A mom of many supporting wholeheartedly those that know they want none.


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## NewYawker

I loved reading this thread, very interesting responses.  At one time I considered myself "on the fence" on the children issue then I realized that being undecided was not nearly enough commitment to raise a child. I have no regrets, I agree with some of the people here who classified themselves as being "selfish".  It only means that I can't give enough of myself to do it right.  You cant send it back like a trout if it isn't to your liking! This is a real to each his/her own topic.


----------



## DznyLvr2005

I'm just sad (right now) as to the fact that some poeple that don't want kids or don't try to have them, get pregnant!!!  It's been months and can't seem to!!!  I got married in October.  I don't think I'm workin' correctly because AF hasnt been around since October.  Time to visit the doctor I think...
But even people that dont want them, and they they get preg. say it's the best thing thats ever happened to them...Then you can bring them to DW


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## PrincessKitty1

DznyLvr2005 said:
			
		

> But even people that dont want them, and they they get preg. say it's the best thing thats ever happened to them...Then you can bring them to DW



SOME people say it's the best thing that every happened to them....and SOME people sincerely regret having kids, and some people even ABUSE kids. If somebody thinks they don't want kids, I think it's very short-sighted to say "It'll be the best thing that ever happened to you" because for many people, it's not.


----------



## tinkerdorabelle

Thank you for posting this.  My husband and I do not have children, and we're 40.  We've been married for 14 years.  Unfortunately it was bc I was considered "high risk".  It absolutely blows my mind the questions we get.   You're made to feel like an outcast and I many times don't want to go into the details of why we have or don't have children. I actually told one person the details after her pushing, and she went on to talk about how she knows someone with cancer that had kids, etc., etc. (as if my health issue isn't adequate enough reason).  Then someone sat me down in front of a group of people gathering everyone together from the other rooms for a big "discussion".  I had no idea what it was, but to my shock it was to discuss  my adopting a child, unbelievable! (it was my bro's new wife at the time and thank goodness she is no more!).    The questions and comments can be endless and cruel even.   We're getting ready to travel again to Disney in April by ourselves.  There are many times that we have brought our niece and nephew (who we are very close to and think of as our kids also), and have also gone with other family members but its just us this year and we absolutely love it!  Thanks again for this post and for the venting!    PS, I have to mention also that my husband and I are both 40,  but no one believes our age,  we both look younger and feel younger too!  hehe


----------



## mrsscooter

ChisJo said:
			
		

> What if you were unable to have children, but really wanted them? How would they feel then, asking you those same questions? Jo




I just love to read posts all over this board, and I know I probably really dont belong here, per say, BUT I have experienced this comment as stated above, regarding not being able to have kids and constantly being harrassed about it.  It took us six looooooooong and emotionaly draining years before we were able to conceive and all I heard that entire time was "when are you going to have kids" or "shouldnt you be be starting a family by now" or "its been a year since you got married, when are you going to have a baby".  I got so tired of trying to hide the fact that we could not and were trying in vain that i just blurted it out one afternoon at a baby shower for a relative and stormed out.  WEll, needless to say not one person said another thing regarding that subject until I finally got pregnant.  Ok, I am sorry, I didn't meant to carry on or burst out with this story, but I can totally relate and trust me, there are days when I just think to myself, what the HELL was I thinking.....................LOL


----------



## DznyLvr2005

mrsscooter said:
			
		

> I just love to read posts all over this board, and I know I probably really dont belong here, per say, BUT I have experienced this comment as stated above, regarding not being able to have kids and constantly being harrassed about it.  It took us six looooooooong and emotionaly draining years before we were able to conceive and all I heard that entire time was "when are you going to have kids" or "shouldnt you be be starting a family by now" or "its been a year since you got married, when are you going to have a baby".  I got so tired of trying to hide the fact that we could not and were trying in vain that i just blurted it out one afternoon at a baby shower for a relative and stormed out.  WEll, needless to say not one person said another thing regarding that subject until I finally got pregnant.  Ok, I am sorry, I didn't meant to carry on or burst out with this story, but I can totally relate and trust me, there are days when I just think to myself, what the HELL was I thinking.....................LOL



I totally understand....
People are already asking us and we only got married in October.  And we're trying with no luck, but I just want to say to them "shut up, it's not that easy, Do you want to pay for my doctor bills and tell me why I'm not yet!!!" (Because I know I have a fertility problem)  to those people that ask.  Of course the people that do ask have tons of kids and they had no problem getting pregnant.


----------



## cosmo531

i think people with kids (aka: "breeders") give us couples without kids (aka: "happy people") a hard time about having kids because they want us to be just as miserable as they are.


----------



## tinker&belle

This was so encouraging to read because it is something I feel pressure about all the time. We have been married for almost 2.5 years. While we were engaged people were already asking, and so the night before the wedding I joked to my fiance, now husband, that when they asked when we were going to have children we should say, "Oh, the doctor says about 7 months!"  

Seriously, it hasn't died down any since the time. I am a teacher and only 25, so I already feel I get my nurturing out of my system during the day and can come home to my husband, 2 cats, and quiet home in the evening. 

My mother in-law asks all the time. Although I love children, I feel like it should be something I strongly desire to make my life complete whereas right now I don't feel that desire. I'm sure if it came about on accident (like oh so many beautiful, wonderful children do) it would be absolutely perfect in it's own way. Otherwise, I'm enjoying my classroom and planning my perfect first stay at WDW.


----------



## Kycha

DH(42) and I(37) have been together for 16 years, married for 9.  We are still asked the question "When are you two having kids?"  Most of the time by complete strangers or people we have just met.  Although, my cousins wife just asked me a couple months ago.  Whenever I am asked I just ignore the question and don't respond at all.  This seems to work for me.


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## jmd00ley

My DH and I are 29 and we have been called selfish, vain, self-centered and others things that are not nice to repeat because we choose not to have children.  Maybe we are selfish because we don't want our sleep disturbed at 3 AM or have to arrange our lives to accomodate that of a child.  But my question is, "Wouldn't it be more selfish to have a child and feel this way than not have one?"

I always hated for people to tell me "You don't know what you are missing by not having a kid."  This usually made me saying something like "You don't know what YOU are missing by having them"

When we tell people we are going to Disney, we hear things like "Why? Disney is for kids and you dont have any!"


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## Markstudy

cosmo531 said:
			
		

> i think people with kids (aka: "breeders") give us couples without kids (aka: "happy people") a hard time about having kids because they want us to be just as miserable as they are.


Yep!    

I go to Disney, because I'd rather be a kid, than have a kid.  

Just Married, Back from Honeymoon at Beach Club Jan 14-21 2006
 (we are 41 and 42 years old) Life is simple and sweet.

Everyone needs a hobby, and if you love kids....well good for you   
We've got a list of things we want to do with our lifes, and kids aren't on it


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## rucorey

It seems like when your the only couple without kids (8+years), everyone asks the same two questions - When are you having kids? and Why do you go to Disney without them? It's great to see we are not alone. Some people just don't get it and that's actually fine with me. I don't want to be behind them in line for  the Tea Cups (we will make you throw up!) complaining about the huge, off season, 'gasp!, 15 minute wait! I find myself not recommending DW to everyone who will listen...


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## PrincessKitty1

Markstudy said:
			
		

> Yep!
> 
> I go to Disney, because I'd rather be a kid, than have a kid.
> 
> Just Married, Back from Honeymoon at Beach Club Jan 14-21 2006
> (we are 41 and 42 years old) Life is simple and sweet.
> 
> Everyone needs a hobby, and if you love kids....well good for you
> We've got a list of things we want to do with our lifes, and kids aren't on it




Congratulations!!  What a wonderful honeymoon you must have had at Disney!

I keep trying to think of a place I'd rather go for my 50th birthday (coming up this year), and I still keep coming up with Disney.


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## C.Ann

Well if you REALLY want to shut them up permanently, I think this response - in a very stern tone - would do the trick:

"Because we can't stand the little rug rats!!"    

Seriously though - you don't owe anyone an explanation and if it's really terribly upsetting and annoying to have to go through this time and time again, I wouldn't hesitate to use the response above or something similar to it..  Some people just "don't get the message" without a little "shock" value..


----------



## princess-rn

I think it's no one's business what you decide when it comes to children.  Therefore I don't think you should  bother answering the question.  

It hurts me so badly to hear people say they don't want kids..."never have never will."  All I've ever wanted in life was to be a mother....and without the WONDERFUL medical advances we have now I couldn't be one.  I am the PROUD mother of a 3 year old little boy and am trying DESPERATELY to have another.  It's very very hard when you want kids...but can't do it as you should.  So don't be so hard on the people that ask.  Kids are wonderful, AMAZING joys in your life. I can't imagine how empty my life would be without my son (I also have a WONDERFUL Husband).  Maybe that's why people ask...they just can't imagine life without their kids.  Once you have them and experience the joy you forget what you life was like before.   However, with that in mind, no one should judge you for not wanting them....I too, think you should either ignore the question or just say "No" and leave it at that.


----------



## rigs32

princess-rn said:
			
		

> I think it's no one's business what you decide when it comes to children.  Therefore I don't think you should  bother answering the question.
> 
> It hurts me so badly to hear people say they don't want kids..."never have never will."  All I've ever wanted in life was to be a mother....



These two statements are inherantly at odds.  You support whatever choice another adult makes, but are hurt if they do not make the same choice as you?  Or are you advocating not answering the "when are you having kids" question if you are going to say never, but those who are going to have them should answer?

If I am a fireman, and have always wanted to be a fireman, and a friend says they never want to be a fireman, it doesn't make sense for me to be upset.  Just because I made a life choice doesn't mean that everyone else should make the same choice.


----------



## princess-rn

rigs32 said:
			
		

> These two statements are inherantly at odds.  You support whatever choice another adult makes, but are hurt if they do not make the same choice as you?  Or are you advocating not answering the "when are you having kids" question if you are going to say never, but those who are going to have them should answer?
> 
> If I am a fireman, and have always wanted to be a fireman, and a friend says they never want to be a fireman, it doesn't make sense for me to be upset.  Just because I made a life choice doesn't mean that everyone else should make the same choice.




You misread my statement.  I'm sorry if it wasn't crystal clear.  The two statements may be "inherantly at odds" to you...but they are how I feel.  I DO support the choice that others make of not having children...but I can not help that I feel a deep pain when I hear people that are so adverse to having children.  I feel that pain NOT because they don't "feel the way I do"...but because I WANT kids so badly and it's so HARD for me to get pregnant.  That's it period.  I respect their decision.  Parenting is NOT for everyone that's for sure....but I can't help that my longing for another child that I may never have makes me so sensitive to this issue.  

Again..I'm sorry if I offended anyone with my post.  I just hurt so bad over my fertility issues...and I guess I just don't make myself clear through the tears.


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## pkitty

I have not had a chance to read ALL the responses but I think after reading many of them I'm beginning to see a common thread among most of the posts. I would like to add my 2 cents on this discussion simply by saying. TALK IS CHEAP ! Remember that old saying? As long as we are able to recognize this and hope that most of us don't get too wrapped up in the B.S. of simple questions, where not much thought was put in to it. 
I know right now I have alot of time on my hands and can type this post hoping I can give the right answer but if it were in real time, communication skills 101 is not my best subject. But I do try my best to be quick on my feet(hehe). I can see from what people are typing here that alot of their friends relitives or neighbors have the same problem; but they are trying to communicate with you and in doing so are learning from you and so you with them. In time the ones who ask the worst questions and can't get along will have to learn how to be more respectful and think a little bit more before spouting off at someone and hurting their feelings. If they just don't get it and go through life p@$$@*g people off then they're going to be pretty lonely people, divorced or unable to carry on in relationships. In the end those types of people will always pay.

Good luck to everyone with the choices you make and don't let the comments get you so worked up.


----------



## rhiannonwales

I am a mom of 2 but i wanted to give my encouragement and respect to those who have made the choice not to have kids.

I give you much credit for knowing exactly what you want out of your life.Maybe in 5 years youll change your mind, maybe not.But its no one else's buisness!!I dont think that your being selfish and immature at all!Honestly i think that a lot of people have kids for the WRONG reasons.And some of them ARE selfish...they want to have unconditional love for someone, without having to earn it.They want to save a marriage.They want to be like all their friends who have kids.

Honestly, if every person on earth procreated just once, there would be no food for everyone.It is part of natures plan that not every creature will procreate,whether by choice or by accident.

If people ask why not, you dont owe them any explanation, period.One good way of deflecting an unwanted question is to trun it back on the questioner.For example if they ask you if you have kids and why not, say to them "do you have kids? Why?" When they flounder for an answer, i think they will get the poin that its none o thier buisness.
Good luck to all of you who face this dilemma!
Sherrie


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## gatour

I just point to my Mercedes Benz and say there is my non-existent kid's college fund.  

Seriously, I like the response in the fourth paragraph in rhiannonwales' reply.

We got married in our mid thirties, and by then both of us had decided we were to set in our ways etc to have kids.


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## LindsayDunn228

C.Ann said:
			
		

> Well if you REALLY want to shut them up permanently, I think this response - in a very stern tone - would do the trick:
> 
> * "Because we can't stand the little rug rats!!"
> *
> Seriously though - you don't owe anyone an explanation and if it's really terribly upsetting and annoying to have to go through this time and time again, I wouldn't hesitate to use the response above or something similar to it..  Some people just "don't get the message" without a little "shock" value..



Seriously though, I HAVE said that before!!! 

My husband and I aren't going to have any kids. He got a vasectomy before we got married (I was willing to get my tubes tied, but he volunteered for the other). We don't really care for kids and don't want any of our own. I am one of those women that if I did come up pregnant, I would be crying my eyes out with an EPT in one hand screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" 

We will be celebrating our 2 year anniversary next week. We love our life and don't want to have kids. We have heard all kinds of questions though. Sad thing is, when someone asks and I tell them we aren't going to have kids, a lot of the time they automatically assume I can't (I'm a paraplegic). That really chafes my rear. They give me that hideous sympathetic look and nod their heads.


----------



## maddhatir

LindsayDunn228 said:
			
		

> Seriously though, I HAVE said that before!!!
> 
> My husband and I aren't going to have any kids. He got a vasectomy before we got married (I was willing to get my tubes tied, but he volunteered for the other). We don't really care for kids and don't want any of our own. I am one of those women that if I did come up pregnant, I would be crying my eyes out with an EPT in one hand screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"




OMG!!! Me too-- glad ta meechya!   

and i think people make you want to scream "Because we can't stand the little rug rats!!" because they just assume you want them! they dont get it!

i feel like i am the LUCKIEST WOMAN ALIVE because i dont have kids--- just look at some of the people who do...they dont look too happy to me!!   

i dont get the whole "kids" concept....looks like too much work and agg to me!


----------



## Twingle

Wow there are some unbelievable comments on this thread!  I'm shocked at what people will say when they find out you don't have children.  Yikes!

When my DH and I were first married, the first time I met his grandmother, she asked us why we didn't have children yet.  When we told her we didn't know if we'd have any, SHE ASKED ME IF I WAS DISEASED!  I was amazed!  WOW!

Having or not having children is a personal choice.  You can be "right" if you choose to have them, or "right" if you choose not too.  You have to make that decision for yourself.  My husband and I chose to have children, and I'm glad that we did.  It was a personal decision for us, and one that I'm glad we made.  Is it all sunshine and roses every minute of every day?  Of course not.  But nothing is, not marriage, not parenthood, not your job, not anything.  Most of the time it's wonderful, but I had wonderful times before I was a parent also.

Unfortunately there are people that think that "their" way is the "right" way.  Just try your best to take it with a grain on salt (and a shot of tequlia!).  I heard lots of rude comments when I had no children, one child, when I was pregnant with my twins and now that I have three.  There are always going to be people that have something rude to say.


----------



## LindsayDunn228

Maddhatir, bless you!!!!!!!!!! Glad someone else shares my feelings!  If you want a friend, well by golly you just made one!


----------



## maddhatir

LindsayDunn228 said:
			
		

> Maddhatir, bless you!!!!!!!!!! Glad someone else shares my feelings!  If you want a friend, well by golly you just made one!


----------



## HockeyGoddess

hey there all, 

my dh & i have also chosen not to have children...not because we don't love kids (they're especially wonderful when you can give them back) but because we just didn't feel we would make good parents. totally honest answer, neither us of at anytime in our lives were like "omg we have to have children", we just didn't feel it.  

after 14 years of marriage (and being over 40) people have finally stopped asking. it was our decision - you shouldn't have children because it's expected or because it would make someone else, like your mother in law (love her) happy.


----------



## gatour

princess-rn,

You said...
'I think it's no one's business what you decide when it comes to children. Therefore I don't think you should bother answering the question.

It hurts me so badly to hear people say they don't want kids..."never have never will."All I've ever wanted in life was to be a mother....and without the WONDERFUL medical advances we have now I couldn't be one."

Speaking for myself, I don't mind someone making an innocent inquiry about our lack of children, but the problem is when they keep on asking or implying why my wife and myself do not have children.  It is one thing to ask nicely in polite conversation, but is another thing to keep rephrasing the same question over a period of time.  

I think that is the point most of us who are deciding not to have children are trying to make here , we are not trying to be mean to any particular person, but when that person repeatedly asks the same question about children then it gets tiresome.


----------



## Kay7979

Wow, I just stumbled across this thread, read some of the first posts and some of the last, and boy does this all bring back memories. I am 50 now. I was married very young, and my husband and I did not want to have children. No doctor would give him a vasectomy because they couldn't believe he wouldn't change his mind in a few years. For all that you hear about kids right out of high school getting married, and all the strikes against them, we were right for each other, and we had a fantastic marriage. We were best friends. I loved him so much it hurt. We had such a great relationship we just didn't want to bring kids into the picture and mess things up. I kept thinking "what if they come between us, or grow up and hate us for disiplining them and fight with us all the time." I know having kids can be great and there can be a lot of wonderful times and experiences together, but we just liked life the way it was and were content without kids. 

I remember people were shocked when I told them we didn't plan to have a family. They said we were selfish. Then they gave me a bunch of reasons to have children that to me were far more selfish than NOT having them could ever be, like, "you'll have no one to take care of you in your old age." or "you'll be sorry when you're older and you don't have family visit you on holidays." ARGH. The worst part was they said things that made it sound like there were a bunch of little souls up in heaven that would never have bodies because I refused to have children! Seriously! To listen to these people you would think the children already existed and were waiting for me to "do my part" and I was denighing them an existance! 

So, to finish my tale, my husband was killed in a car accident before our sixth anniversary. Being a childless widow was better than being left young and alone with kids to take care of. I remarried later but it was a mistake and ended in divorce a few years later. Again, thank goodness there were no children. I spent the next 15 years single until I finally met the right man, DH, at about 40. He has three kids that live with his ex, and I have had the chance to watch them grow up and spend time with them, but it has been more of an aunt function, really, than a mother, and that has suited me. 

You will always have the opportunity to instill some of your kindness, wisdom, and values in other children, not your own, throughout your life. That is one of the nicest aspects of parenting anyway, and it is not an exclusive province to parents. All of us can help shape and direct the lives of the children we meet, and touch them in some special and memorable way. Don't be influenced or upset by rude people. Do what you believe is right for you and your husband.


----------



## disneyholic family

Krissalee said:
			
		

> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!




I haven't read the thread but to respond to your post, i'm 50 years old and i do have kids, but i definitely think that going childless is a valid choice.

And i'm shocked that people would be so rude as to tell you that it's not.

I have many friends my age who are childless by choice (married since their 20s and who made the decision never to have kids).     A few of them now regret it (one had a child recently, the other couldn't because of an irreversible vasectomy).  
But the vast majority of them are as happy and content today as they were 25 years ago when they made the decision.   
One of the couples is particularly amusing.  He's a pediatric surgeon and she's a pediatrician.  They both say they see plenty of kids during the day, no need to go home to any at night.  And they've always wanted to enjoy their life.  To pick up and travel at the drop of a hat.  etc etc.  They love their life still today.  And as i said, i have many friends who feel the same.

People should do what's right for them.  

Tell them that any choice you make for YOU is valid for you.  Maybe not for them.  But you're not deciding for them, only for you.

By the way, I do have kids (now 21 and 18).  I love them dearly, and i probably would have them again if i had it to do all over again.  But i can definitely see my life as being equally fulfilling and valid childless.  This was the path I chose and life is good.  But I'm sure it would have been good the other way as well..

Have a great life and do NOT worry about what other people think. It's your life to live, not theirs.


----------



## LindsayDunn228

gatour said:
			
		

> It hurts me so badly to hear people say they don't want kids..."never have never will."All I've ever wanted in life was to be a mother....and without the WONDERFUL medical advances we have now I couldn't be one.



And you know what, that's great for you. Medical intervention has made it possible for you to conceive because you couldn't. That's great and I'm happy things worked out for you. But....

I am not going to be made to feel bad/guilty because I am capable of having kids and choose not to, when so many people want them and can't have them. It is not my fault some folks are unable to conceive and I can. And I am not going to have them because of that. 

I truly feel for those who want kids and can't have them. Someone might argue why spend SOOOOO much money on medical intervention that may or may not cause conception when there are so many children, yes even infants, in desperate need for adoption. Know what I mean??

I'm not flaming you at all, but I just had to say my piece.


----------



## CJK

I love how this thread continues to resurface.

I have a question to those of you who have decided not to have children.  We are in our early 30's and are still on the fence.  We came very close to making a decision (to have a child) around Christmas, but have since returned to the fence...  My question is this:  How do you feel watching your friends get pregnant, have babies and get involved in all of the parenting activities?

I now only have 3 friends without children.  Each time I find out about another friend becoming pregnant, my reaction is so incredibly mixed.  I'm thrilled for the person (especially if they've suffered through miscarriages but have managed to still have successful pregnancies), but I also find myself feeling terribly sad.  I sometimes wonder what's wrong with me and feel left out.  Will I turn 40 one day and regret not having children?  But, I also know that fear of the unknown is NOT a reason TO have a baby.  I just feel so sad, as if I'm being left behind while my friends all move forward.  A group of friends of ours always get together a couple times a year, and for our next get together, dh and I will be the only ones without a baby, or at least pregnant.  It's hard to admit, but I'm dreading going...

Have any of you felt similarly, or are you so content with your decision, that it doesn't even bother you?


----------



## tinkerdorabelle

Princess-RN, you kill me.   I'm sorry you feel bad and hurt that you can't have kids and find people that can hurting you somehow.  My husband and I were told I was high risk and never had kids, we could have adopted or could have even tried to have a child and risked my health and the baby's, and it never fails to amaze me that some people, even ones that are aware of this, continue to ask.  So you have to understand just bc you're hurt it doesn't give you the right to hurt others as it goes both ways.  And for those who aren't hurt exactly, its just plain dang rude!  Its a very private, and sometimes with some persons, extremely painful, personal thing.    Our neighbors don't have kids, they're almost 40, and they just don't want to.  To me its almost the same as asking someone their personal bedroom questions.  I have the same persons over and over ask me, and even when I explain, then go on about something else like adoption, and as I explained in an earlier post, my DB's now ex-wife (thank gosh!) sat me around room literally, with me sitting in a small chair in front of a large circular couch seating several of her friends and relatives to discuss it,  many of these people I didn't even know, its absolutely outrageous!  I had no idea what she had seated me for, but felt the blood literally drain out of my body and handled it very nicely and politely. People have and do not have kids for many reasons and its no ones business any very inconsiderate.  Thank you for letting me vent but wow its a reaaly sore subject and it never fails to amaze me the absolute, rude cruel, yes cruel things I have been asked.  When my ex-sister-in-law was explained and her friends that I was considered high risk and my child may inherit a bleeding disorder I had, they actually said to me, "well a friend of ours has cancer and had a baby" what absolute meanness, yes meanness, it never ends and there is no excuse for it.  Maybe some mean well but I hope by reading these posts they finally have some understanding.


----------



## maddhatir

CJK said:
			
		

> I love how this thread continues to resurface.
> 
> I have a question to those of you who have decided not to have children.  We are in our early 30's and are still on the fence.  We came very close to making a decision (to have a child) around Christmas, but have since returned to the fence...  My question is this:  How do you feel watching your friends get pregnant, have babies and get involved in all of the parenting activities?
> 
> I now only have 3 friends without children.  Each time I find out about another friend becoming pregnant, my reaction is so incredibly mixed.  I'm thrilled for the person (especially if they've suffered through miscarriages but have managed to still have successful pregnancies), but I also find myself feeling terribly sad.  I sometimes wonder what's wrong with me and feel left out.  Will I turn 40 one day and regret not having children?  But, I also know that fear of the unknown is NOT a reason TO have a baby.  I just feel so sad, as if I'm being left behind while my friends all move forward.  A group of friends of ours always get together a couple times a year, and for our next get together, dh and I will be the only ones without a baby, or at least pregnant.  It's hard to admit, but I'm dreading going...
> 
> Have any of you felt similarly, or are you so content with your decision, that it doesn't even bother you?



me and DH have been together for almost 26 years-- we met in our teens and have been together ever since.

we BOTH have always agreed that we never wanted kids- we just KNEW IT, from day one- i have NEVER had the urge or never questioned should I??

when i see my friends with kids- i think i am very lucky not to have them. if someone is pregnant- i think hey!- better you than me! this is the truth- i have NO desire for children and never had.

i have nieces and nephews that i love very much (me and dh just took our niece to disney in dec) however, i love to give them back also


----------



## mousiemom

I really enjoyed your story!  Well, I try hard in my life not to judge people and to be very open because you never know what will come your way.  My DH and I have been married for 6 years now, and we have the sweetest 5yr. old little girl.  We went back and forth on if we wanted another child but we have so much fun with her and don't have the desire to have another one.  Today, with my generation(36) we all work!!  Like my mama, she didn't have to work and raised 4 kids.  It takes more money for everything.  So, we are happy with just one.  Anyways, I couldn't stand to have to wait 2 years to go to Disney World!!Hee! Hee!


----------



## salmoneous

CJK said:
			
		

> My question is this:  How do you feel watching your friends get pregnant, have babies and get involved in all of the parenting activities?


 Speaking more from DW's standpoint than my own (it's really her vote), when you see your friends who just had babies you fall into one camp:

1) Oh, it's sooo cute I want one, or
2) Um, yeah, that's a baby isn't it

If you fall into camp #2, you start to think about morning sickness, back aches, labor pains, diapers, child care problems, dealing with schools and teachers, teenage years, college costs and adult children who won't leave home. And you just don't feel bad about your choice  

Of course, if you fall into camp #1, then the joy of parenthood can be so great that all that other stuff doesn't matter.

Now my mom has told the story over (and over and over) about how she never liked children until she had one, and that attitudes change when they are *your* kids. Of course, DM also said DW's attitude would change as she got older and that sure didn't happen.

Having kids is a serious commitment; we couldn't take the responsibility unless we knew we had a burning desire. Having one on the chance we might change our minds after the kid showed up just didn't seem to be the thing to do. 

Nobody should feel guilty about their choices.


----------



## LindsayDunn228

CJK said:
			
		

> How do you feel watching your friends get pregnant, have babies and get involved in all of the parenting activities?



Truthfully, I am thrilled it is not us.


----------



## WillCAD

salmoneous said:
			
		

> Speaking more from DW's standpoint than my own (it's really her vote), when you see your friends who just had babies you fall into one camp:
> 
> 1) Oh, it's sooo cute I want one, or
> 2) Um, yeah, that's a baby isn't it
> 
> If you fall into camp #2, you start to think about morning sickness, back aches, labor pains, diapers, child care problems, dealing with schools and teachers, teenage years, college costs and adult children who won't leave home. And you just don't feel bad about your choice
> 
> Of course, if you fall into camp #1, then the joy of parenthood can be so great that all that other stuff doesn't matter.
> 
> Now my mom has told the story over (and over and over) about how she never liked children until she had one, and that attitudes change when they are *your* kids. Of course, DM also said DW's attitude would change as she got older and that sure didn't happen.
> 
> Having kids is a serious commitment; we couldn't take the responsibility unless we knew we had a burning desire. Having one on the chance we might change our minds after the kid showed up just didn't seem to be the thing to do.
> 
> Nobody should feel guilty about their choices.



There's also camp #3, which is me:

*3) Oh, it's so cute, but I don't want one of my own.*

I've been brother, cousin, and uncle to kids my whole life; I'm the oldest grandchild on both sides and have about 40 cousins ranging in age from 36 down to 4. I also have a neice and nephew, 6 and 11. I've never been starved for kid-attention, but as Uncle Will, I get teh best of both worlds - I can play with the kids, teach them stuff like reading and using computers and riding bikes, and still send them back to their parents when I get tired.

When I hear that another family member or friend is having a kid, I am happy for them, but it just doesn't make me want to have one of my own any more than seeing a kid in a cereal commercial on TV does.


----------



## CJK

Wow, thanks for your responses everyone.

I don't think I belong into any of the categories you mentioned!  I can see a baby and think they're cute, but I'm terrifed of actually *having* one of my own.  Would I screw him/her up?  Would I resent the lack of freedom?  Would the child resent me for not being a good parent?  etc...  The list goes on ranging from selfish reasons to stoic reasons of not wanting to bring a child into this world.  I WISH I could just be sure that either A) I DO want a child.  and B) I DON'T want a child.  I just don't seem to be able to fall into either category but the tick of the click is keeping me up at night!  Oh how I wish we could stop the clock for a few years while I sit on this issue (while throwing in a few trips to Disney in the meantime!  )


----------



## 2vets

CJK said:
			
		

> I love how this thread continues to resurface.
> 
> I have a question to those of you who have decided not to have children.  We are in our early 30's and are still on the fence.  We came very close to making a decision (to have a child) around Christmas, but have since returned to the fence...  My question is this:  How do you feel watching your friends get pregnant, have babies and get involved in all of the parenting activities?
> 
> I now only have 3 friends without children.  Each time I find out about another friend becoming pregnant, my reaction is so incredibly mixed.  I'm thrilled for the person (especially if they've suffered through miscarriages but have managed to still have successful pregnancies), but I also find myself feeling terribly sad.  I sometimes wonder what's wrong with me and feel left out.  Will I turn 40 one day and regret not having children?  But, I also know that fear of the unknown is NOT a reason TO have a baby.  I just feel so sad, as if I'm being left behind while my friends all move forward.  A group of friends of ours always get together a couple times a year, and for our next get together, dh and I will be the only ones without a baby, or at least pregnant.  It's hard to admit, but I'm dreading going...
> 
> Have any of you felt similarly, or are you so content with your decision, that it doesn't even bother you?



You sound like me a little...

I am sorry you are having a hard time with this.  I, too, have mixed emotions at times.  That's why DH and I revisit the issue on occasion - and I know we'd be fine if we got pregnant, we'd be happy, and we'd change our lives...but the thing is, we have to sit down and ask, "Is this what we really WANT?  US, not our parents, not because we want to fit in with the other couples our age we see everywhere, but US?"  My answer is no.  Maybe that will change - and if it does and we can't conceive, we will adopt - we will simply up and find an unwanted baby, either from here or from another country.  There will always be a way to take in an unwanted child.  As for regret, my two cents...regret is a useless emotion...you cannot change what has passed, but you can take the experience (or lack of one in this case) and move forward.  

I wish you luck and peace in making your decision.

As for us, we are headed to WDW in 7 days (YIPPEEYAHHOOOOO), and I suspect that I will not miss having kids while we're there...we could never keep up our commando pace with a stroller and baby-swapping!!


----------



## maddhatir

CJK said:
			
		

> Wow, thanks for your responses everyone.
> 
> I don't think I belong into any of the categories you mentioned!  I can see a baby and think they're cute, but I'm terrifed of actually *having* one of my own.  Would I screw him/her up?  Would I resent the lack of freedom?  Would the child resent me for not being a good parent?  etc...  The list goes on ranging from selfish reasons to stoic reasons of not wanting to bring a child into this world.  I WISH I could just be sure that either A) I DO want a child.  and B) I DON'T want a child.  I just don't seem to be able to fall into either category but the tick of the click is keeping me up at night!  Oh how I wish we could stop the clock for a few years while I sit on this issue (while throwing in a few trips to Disney in the meantime!  )



you know, i honestly think- if you are terrified- thats OK- you sound like you might still want kids-- i thinkg EVERYONE who has kids were terrified at one time or another-- even at the thought......but if you are like me---

you just cant stand the thought of having kids! i am not terrified i just HATE the whole idea of having kids-- i dont think it would be fine after i had it---it does not keep me up thinking should i or shouldnt i--- i KNOW-- i DO NOT WANT KIDS-- period!

if anyone actually takes the time to THINK about it.....ponder.....i think you are not one of us who DEFINATELY DO NOT WANT KIDS!

i think you would be just fine having them!


----------



## disneyholic family

CJK said:
			
		

> not wanting to bring a child into this world.



that's actually a very good reason...
that is a thought that often crosses my mind.....life isn't necessarily easy...in fact, it's often quite the opposite....
even for my kids, who are gifted and were lucky enough to be born into a family that's at least reasonably financially confortable, still life could well be difficult for them....possibly more than difficult....

so i wonder to myself, how kind it was of me to bring my kids into that...
into a life where they may have to struggle and suffer.....(and given the current geopolitical turn of the world - the suffering is probably going to get much worse before it gets better - if it ever does)..

it's funny really, because back in the 60's that was one of the mantras - how we shouldn't bring children into this awful world.....and some of the people i know who don't have kids today are products of the 60's....but in the ensuing years, that point of view seemed to go undercover......but i think it may be coming back again...or at least, i've finally come around to that point of view...

what a cheerul topic for a board that's supposed to be about the happeist place on earth.....


----------



## WillCAD

disneyholic family said:
			
		

> that's actually a very good reason...
> that is a thought that often crosses my mind.....life isn't necessarily easy...in fact, it's often quite the opposite....
> even for my kids, who are gifted and were lucky enough to be born into a family that's at least reasonably financially confortable, still life could well be difficult for them....possibly more than difficult....
> 
> so i wonder to myself, how kind it was of me to bring my kids into that...
> into a life where they may have to struggle and suffer.....(and given the current geopolitical turn of the world - the suffering is probably going to get much worse before it gets better - if it ever does)..
> 
> it's funny really, because back in the 60's that was one of the mantras - how we shouldn't bring children into this awful world.....and some of the people i know who don't have kids today are products of the 60's....but in the ensuing years, that point of view seemed to go undercover......but i think it may be coming back again...or at least, i've finally come around to that point of view...
> 
> what a cheerul topic for a board that's supposed to be about the happeist place on earth.....



That's a totally bogus reason not to have kids.

Today's world, despite all the sadness and hardship, is the best world in Human history, especially in the developed countries like North America and Europe.

Polio is gone. Smallpox is gone. Diptheria is gone in the developed world. Mumps and measles are considered simple childhood diseases instead of instant death sentences. People are actualy living through cancers and tumors, and look at the state of emergency medicine and surgury - injurries that would have been guaranteed fatal only 40 years ago are routinely fixed today. The average Human life span is up to around 75 years, whereas it was in teh 40s only a few centuries ago.

In countries like the US, people are born with so much to eat that obesity is actually becoming a health problem. Not only do we have plenty, but we have the widest variety of foods ever - beef, chicken, pork, fruits and vegetables of all descriptions, any kind of grain, and the variety of seafood that can be found in any grocery store anywhere in the US is absolutely miraculous. Just 50 years ago, fresh shrimp was considered the height of luxury in landlocked states, and beef was tough to get if you didn't live in the parts of the country where it was raised. Heck, I can get real lobster at my local Chinese buffet for $10!

There are still homeless people, but when is the last time you saw a shanty town? Not in my lifetime.

Wanna travel? Even people in what the US calls the "poverty" level often have cars and can save up enough to take a vacation once a year. Not everyone can afford WDW or Vegas, but a camping trip to the mountains or a few days at the beach are within the grasp of the vast majority of people.

Communications? Entertainment? Education? All have made advances in the last 200 years that would have made Ben Franklin curse the fact that he was born 18th century instead of the 20th.

Yes, there are still bad things in the world - war, poverty, disease, hunger, and worst of all, hatred. But each of these things is smaller and far less pervasive than they have ever been in all of Human existance, and they are only getting smaller. The world will never be perfect, but it is better now that it ever has been, and it's only getting better.


----------



## disneyholic family

WillCAD said:
			
		

> That's a totally bogus reason not to have kids.




in your opinion it's a bogus reason...not mine...

life's a ***** and then you die..
and when you have kids you sentence them to the same thing...
i have kids....that's my point of view...
you can't tell me that my point of view is bogus....that's my point of view...you can have a different point of view....we all look at the world through our own filter...


----------



## bicker

I'm not sure about the "bogus-ness" of various reason's presented.  However, IMHO, there isn't a compelling reason to HAVE children, that isn't significantly "self-serving" (though NOT "selfish").  In other words, we aren't running out of population; there is no reason to believe that any more children will have a positive impact on society as-a-whole; there is no doubt that if we invest the same amount of societal energy raising a smaller number of children, that the positive impact of that on society will be more than any perceived negative impact of that ON SOCIETY; there is no reason to doubt that all the extraordinary children (in terms of their impact on society) who would be born would be born anyway, even if a smaller number of children are born, since it is almost assured that investing more in each child raises the chances that that child will be extraordinary.

However, as I alluded to, things aren't so critical that the aforementioned self-motivation is specifically causing any significant damage to society.  People shouldn't feel that they're wrong to satisfy their own personal desires for children, even though the positive impact of more children, in general, is substantially only on specific individuals, based on their own personal satisfaction.


----------



## disneyholic family

bicker said:
			
		

> I'm not sure about the "bogus-ness" of various reason's presented.  However, IMHO, there isn't a compelling reason to HAVE children, that isn't significantly "self-serving" (though NOT "selfish").  In other words, we aren't running out of population; there is no reason to believe that any more children will have a positive impact on society as-a-whole; there is no doubt that if we invest the same amount of societal energy raising a smaller number of children, that the positive impact of that on society will be more than any perceived negative impact of that ON SOCIETY; there is no reason to doubt that all the extraordinary children (in terms of their impact on society) who would be born would be born anyway, even if a smaller number of children are born, since it is almost assured that investing more in each child raises the chances that that child will be extraordinary.
> 
> However, as I alluded to, things aren't so critical that the aforementioned self-motivation is specifically causing any significant damage to society.  People shouldn't feel that they're wrong to satisfy their own personal desires for children, even though the positive impact of more children, in general, is substantially only on specific individuals, based on their own personal satisfaction.




i agree with you........(the concept of self-serving)...

what's really weird to me is why people who really hate kids, have them....it's as if the children are just another possession that they must have....along with their porsche or mercedes or whatever.....they have the kids and then pass them along to a nanny to care for and barely interact with their kids except on special command performance occasions....
it's really quite mind-boggling to me why they have them at all.....and boy are those kids screwed up (i grew up with many like that....they never get over it)....


----------



## WillCAD

disneyholic family said:
			
		

> in your opinion it's a bogus reason...not mine...
> 
> life's a ***** and then you die..
> and when you have kids you sentence them to the same thing...
> i have kids....that's my point of view...
> you can't tell me that my point of view is bogus....that's my point of view...you can have a different point of view....we all look at the world through our own filter...



Okay, maybe it's not bogus, but it's certainly a debatable opinion.

You really think that people (or even just you) shouldn't have kids just because life is tough? Life is not so tough that it's not even worth living - that's the arguement of the suicide brigade, and I don't buy it.

Life has always been tough, and always will be. That's kinda the whole point of life - to overcome the challenges, and to make a good life for yourself, and your family. But with the love and support of your family and friends, or even through your own sheer willpower, life can be worth living, despite the hardships.

If the only valid time to have kids is when life ceases to be tough, then there has never been and will never be a valid time to have kids.

When you have kids the only thing you "sentence" them to is LIFE. Whether it's a good life or a bad life is partially up to you, partially up to them, and partially up to random chance. Life will never be all good or all bad - it will always be somewhere in between, and it's up to each of us to push it more toward the good than the bad, for ourselves and for our children.

If your specific situation is so bad, because of poverty or health reasons, then sure, I buy that it would be too tough to have kids. In fact, I think it's responsible and smart not to have kids if you don't have the mental, physical, or financial resources to properly care for them. But that's a changable situation, _if  you choose to change it_, and it's certainly not a universal situation - it doesn't apply to everybody.

Life in general is simply not so tough that it should discourage people from havng kids if they choose to do so.


----------



## HappyLawyer

well first off it is no ones business and you could just tell them that, or you could be nice.  Now, having a child or children is a lot of work, it takes up allot of your free time, i was so excited about having another child, but i have found myslef rethinking that lately. Some people choose not to have kids, and that is nice because they can travel and not be tied down.  They are free and their extra money is theirs.


----------



## littlegreydonkey

Not been on this forum before but that title just dragged me in - and look, a whole thread full of people like me! I definitely fall into the 'umm, it's a baby' camp - I once described my feelings about kids to someone as 'it's like when someone who doesn't like dogs sees a puppy - they have no desire to scoop it up, get dribbled on by it, or clear up it's mess - and they certainly wouldn't bring one home. It just doesn't enter into their head that it should be part of their life' That's how I feel with babies (but not puppies I hasten to add). But people still say 'oh, you'll change your mind. I don't notice them telling me I'll change my mind about my career, or my hair colour or where I live, but with babies suddenly my brain will do a backflip and I'll get a yen to never sleep again. Hmmm, maybe not.

As for what I think when friends have them - if it's a girl I think 'yipppeee, I can buy cute pink outfits for them'. If it's a boy I think 'oh that's dull, no cute pink outfits.'


----------



## maddhatir

littlegreydonkey said:
			
		

> Not been on this forum before but that title just dragged me in - and look, a whole thread full of people like me! I definitely fall into the 'umm, it's a baby' camp - I once described my feelings about kids to someone as 'it's like when someone who doesn't like dogs sees a puppy - they have no desire to scoop it up, get dribbled on by it, or clear up it's mess - and they certainly wouldn't bring one home. It just doesn't enter into their head that it should be part of their life' That's how I feel with babies (but not puppies I hasten to add). But people still say 'oh, you'll change your mind. I don't notice them telling me I'll change my mind about my career, or my hair colour or where I live, but with babies suddenly my brain will do a backflip and I'll get a yen to never sleep again. Hmmm, maybe not.
> 
> As for what I think when friends have them - if it's a girl I think 'yipppeee, I can buy cute pink outfits for them'. If it's a boy I think 'oh that's dull, no cute pink outfits.'



i would prefer a houseful of animals over a child anyday of the week--

not that i can have animals though-- i am allergic and have asthma-- HEY i wonder if we can start using THAT as an excuse for no kids!!!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

CJK said:
			
		

> Wow, thanks for your responses everyone.
> 
> I don't think I belong into any of the categories you mentioned!  I can see a baby and think they're cute, but I'm terrifed of actually *having* one of my own.  Would I screw him/her up?  Would I resent the lack of freedom?  Would the child resent me for not being a good parent?  etc...  The list goes on ranging from selfish reasons to stoic reasons of not wanting to bring a child into this world.  I WISH I could just be sure that either A) I DO want a child.  and B) I DON'T want a child.  I just don't seem to be able to fall into either category but the tick of the click is keeping me up at night!  Oh how I wish we could stop the clock for a few years while I sit on this issue (while throwing in a few trips to Disney in the meantime!  )




I'm in this camp, too! I *love* babies and kids- I'm a teacher, but I think that once they got older, I wouldn't be able to handle the things kids do and get into these days. I think I would just freak out or be too strict or just lose it. I'm also worried about losing my freedom, but I'm still on the fence with you!


----------



## HockeyGoddess

i don't think it should be soo difficult of a decision, if you want them more than anything...have kids, if you're not sure...wait, if you've never had the urge or in my case never looked into my future and saw myself having children...don't have kids - they're too precious to waste on parents who wouldn't love them more than they love themselves.

of course my mother told me once "your father never really liked children or animals until we had you...a child who loved all animals".  he passed away in 1981, he was my father and my best friend.  so the debate continues.


----------



## disneyholic family

HockeyGoddess said:
			
		

> of course my mother told me once "your father never really liked children or animals until we had you...a child who loved all animals".  he passed away in 1981, he was my father and my best friend.  so the debate continues.




i'm like that....i hate kids...truly....other people's kids that is....but i adore my own....
i was always planning on being a super career person, with nanny's to take care of the kids......and indeed i was a very successful workaholic 'career person' right through to when i went into labor......
i had always thought that i would drop the baby at home on the way from the hospital back to work.....until my daughter was born....then all bets were off....i didn't go back to work for 10 years (my son was born 2 years after my daughter).....
those 10 years 'working' as mom, was the best job i ever had.....i am again a highly successful workaholic but none of it holds a candle to being mom....
but i still hate all kids.....with a passion.......other than my own.....


----------



## taswira

bicker said:
			
		

> I'm not sure about the "bogus-ness" of various reason's presented.  However, IMHO, there isn't a compelling reason to HAVE children, that isn't significantly "self-serving" (though NOT "selfish").  In other words, we aren't running out of population; there is no reason to believe that any more children will have a positive impact on society as-a-whole; there is no doubt that if we invest the same amount of societal energy raising a smaller number of children, that the positive impact of that on society will be more than any perceived negative impact of that ON SOCIETY; there is no reason to doubt that all the extraordinary children (in terms of their impact on society) who would be born would be born anyway, even if a smaller number of children are born, since it is almost assured that investing more in each child raises the chances that that child will be extraordinary.


Great minds think alike - LOL.   

That was the reason I never had any doubts that I personally did not want to have children of my own. I have never regretted that decision.


----------



## kennancat

<bump>


----------



## FamilyGuy

kennancat said:
			
		

> <bump>



No activity on this thread for a couple of months and you decide that you gotta stir the pot! LOL   

Actually, FROM MY PERSONAL POINT OF VIEW, I see no reason to get married, unless you plan to have children.

But again that's just my personal point of view.  I would never question anyone for having made a personal decision not to have children (married or not).  I think it is a little rude to question why a couple is not having children.

Personally though, I would not have gotten married if I did not plan to have children.  I would suggest the same to my own children.  However if they choose to marry and not procreate, that's certainly their decision, not mine, and I would never question or criticize their decision.


----------



## kennancat

littlegreydonkey said:
			
		

> As for what I think when friends have them - if it's a girl I think 'yipppeee, I can buy cute pink outfits for them'. If it's a boy I think 'oh that's dull, no cute pink outfits.'



Okay, that's way too funny - that's my exact thought pattern!  When some friends of ours had twins recently (both boys), one of my comments was, "I was hoping one would be a girl so I could buy her dresses!" I've insisted to DH that if we ever do decide to have kids, I want a girl, and he keeps pointing out to me that I don't get a choice


----------



## kennancat

FamilyGuy said:
			
		

> No activity on this thread for a couple of months and you decide that you gotta stir the pot! LOL
> 
> Actually, FROM MY PERSONAL POINT OF VIEW, I see no reason to get married, unless you plan to have children.



There was a similar discussion going on the community board, so I mentioned this thread and said I'd bump it. I have heard the "why get married if you don't want kids" argument before, and while I don't agree with it, and I can see how it makes sense depending on your background. For my DH and me, living together and uh... other things... weren't an acceptable option outside of marriage. But I can see how others our age without those beliefs wouldn't see the need to get married if they didn't want children. I think it depends on how you view the role and purpose of marriage. I personally think marriage is evolving - I think it once supplied a practical legal arrangement for building societies, and we're now demanding more out of it: love, companionship, financial efficiency, emotional support, etc.. I do think society is becoming more and more accepting of the idea that marriage and family aren't one-size -fits-all, thank goodness.


----------



## Alex2kMommy

I don't know why I feel compelled to join in here, especially since we are all for the most part agreeing, but here is my two cents:

If someone does not want children, or isn't sure if s/he wants children, then do everyone a favor and DON'T.  Wait until and unless you change your mind, because children are too precious and fragile.  The reason people think you will change your mind is because that is usually the case; not always, but usually.  I truly believe they don't mean to be rude (at least _most_ people), they just _don't understand_.

A dear friend of mine is the child of a woman who hated kids.  She had a child only because she had promised her husband when they married, and after waiting many years, he finally pressured her into it, knowing it wasn't what she wanted.  The marriage eventually failed, and the child was left to be raised by this woman.  This childhood I would not wish on anyone.

I'm not saying that every woman who is uncertain of motherhood will be abusive to her child; but I am sure that plenty of well-intentioned people told this woman that she would feel differently once she had a child, and in fact she did not.  She, her child, and all of their loved ones have also paid too high a price for that mistake.

I married at 30, and our intention was to someday have a child.  Once we decided to start, it didn't happen...so we wound up seeing a fertility specialist.  For years I endured endless questions from family, friends, and acquaintances about when we were going to start a family, and jokes about whether we 'knew how to do it right.'  (Yeah, ha ha...    )  It was a very emotionally painful and stressful time, and I truly thought it just wasn't meant to be.

Fortunately for us, our wish came true and we had a healthy baby boy 5 years later.  Nearly 4 years after that, his 'surprise' baby brother came along, and I am a very grateful, happy mother of two.


----------



## maddhatir

FamilyGuy said:
			
		

> Actually, FROM MY PERSONAL POINT OF VIEW, I see no reason to get married, unless you plan to have children.



DH and I NEVER wanted kids- still dont. 

The reason we got married is very romantic-- we were living together about 13 years and a friend of his was getting married- well, when we received the invitation, it had my husbands name 'AND GUEST" on the envelope! maybe he was trying to tell me something!   

what the %@!!?   his friend has known me forever!

i said thats it- were gettin' married so i wont be a guest anymore!

and thats the fairytale of how we happened to get married. i know- you can wipe the tears from your eyes!  

(we did end up doing it right though.......went to bermuda with 20 of our friends and got married!  )


----------



## rigs32

DH and I likely would not have gotten married - just lived together.  BUT he's in the reserves.  Without that piece of paper saying we're married, I'd have ZERO rights to anything.  No access to the base, no information, and certainly no notification if he were to die while deployed.

We're not having kids - we have cats.  I'm my mom's only child and while she does ask now and again if we've thought about kids, she now asks about her grandkitties and typically talks to one on the phone.  Silly, yes, but that cat is more like a dog and super interactive.


----------



## RC Fan

FamilyGuy said:
			
		

> Actually, FROM MY PERSONAL POINT OF VIEW, I see no reason to get married, unless you plan to have children.



I look at it the other way around:  I think if you plan to have children together, you probably might as well go ahead and get hitched.  However, if you both have decided you don't want kids, why not get married if that is what you both want?  A good marriage is a good marriage regardless of whether or not there are children involved.


----------



## Disney Debbie

I always knew I wanted to have kids - but once I had DD neither DH or I wanted another.  We thought our family was perfect the way it was - so we were subjected for MANY years to the "when are you having another?"  "it's not fair to your DD to be an only child   " and my favorite "What if something happens to her?"  Like - oh - good thing we had two kids so we'd have a spare    Anyway - I'm pretty to the point and just told people we didn't want another child - our first one was perfect!  And the "not fair" thing - how stupid is that?  I know lots of people from LARGE families - and they all hate each other.  I can think of two families with over 6 kids where one kid ended up taking care of elderly parents all by themselves!  Who says having siblings is going to make things easier?  My best friend's brother is a homeless alcoholic - yeah - he was a BIG comfort when both her parents died of cancer!

Anyway - I know I'm digressing - I make it a point to NEVER ask people why they don't get married, have children, have more children, want children, etc. because it is NONE OF MY BUSINESS!   There's a guy at work who doesn't want children and the ladies who work for him are always telling him, "You'll change your mind, ya'll just aren't ready yet, blah, blah, blah"  I'm thinking - I hope he doesn't - he'd be a lousy dad and he's smart enough to know it!  I don't get why they care - why do I care if other people have children?  The only person I can imagine caring about would be my DD because I would love to be a grandma - but I wouldn't pressure her about that because after all I'm not the one that would be raising him/her.

I also make sure I never sit around and join in on comments about needing to lose weight, save money  etc because I don't want them to think that those subjects are open for discussion!  We've got too many nosy people in this world and too many people who think because someone asks them something they're obliged to answer them!


----------



## englishteacha

We aren't planning on having kids, but we aren't going to freak out if nature disagrees with our plans.  I have several friends who are getting tons of pressure from their parents to have children.  I guess I'm lucky that my parents already have lots of grandkids and I haven't gotten any pressure from my parents to "give them" grandchildren!


----------



## Luv'sTink

Noone should have children if they dont want them. There are to many people who have kids for whatever reason and dont want them as it is.


----------



## druidia

Yeah, this is an interesting subject, especially among people who love Disney so much.  Outsiders always think that Disney is all about kids, but of course we all know it isn't.  

We are also in the "we don't have kids, we have cats" category.  

We love our cats so much we can hardly stand to leave them for the weekend to go to WDW!  Luckily, we have a wonderful neighbor that loves them, too, so she takes good care of them while we are gone.  We take them with us when we can.

I do not think it is "my duty" to anyone anywhere to have children. Children are work, and they require and deserve someone who is completely devoted to their happiness and well-being.  I know too many parents who view their children as an inconvenience or a way to experience life vicariously, instead of being genuinely interested in raising an independent and loving human being.

Sometimes I think it would be cool to have kids just to take them to WDW, but then we look around at all of the families with kids having meltdowns in the park and realize that sometimes the parents are forcing a good time on kids that really don't care where they are, as long as they are with their parents.  That is a costly lesson to learn. Again, not a reason to have a child.  

I don't know how many people I've encountered in life who tell me that it is both a blessing and a curse.  A few have told me that they wouldn't do it if they could start over.  I would hate to be a parent living with that, and I would hate to be the child living with a parent that felt like that.


----------



## ksoehrlein

I'm another married-with-kids who says good for you for knowing what you want and don't want and for sticking to your guns!  I don't find you to be selfish at all, but rather self-aware -- a much rarer and more admirable trait.  

Also, great for you that you and your SOs are all on the same page with this.  Definitely a sign of a healthy, lasting relationship -- and we all know that kids certainly don't guarantee that.  DH used to date someone (my college roomie   ) who always knew she wanted no part of motherhood.  DH always knew he wanted to be a dad.  I'm so glad for both of them that they broke up before this became an issue.  She remains childfree, married to someone else for over 10 years now, and very happy.  We've been married almost 9 years, have 2 kids, and are also very happy.  (And no, I didn't cause the breakup; DH and I only thought of each other as friends for quite a while after graduation before we suddenly fell in love.)

Snappy comebacks have been fun to read on this thread.  Why not pretend that they've convinced you with the most trivial pro-child argument?  Like some stranger says you'll want kids so you have someone to visit you in the nursing home in your old age and you respond, "OMG!  You're so right!  Let me run to DH/DW right now so we can start trying!"  It'll end the conversation, you can literally run away from them, and they'll either feel they've made a change in your "poor, miserable, childless" lives or realize that you were being sarcastic.


----------



## goofie4goofy

My DH and I don't have kids and people stopped asking a while ago.....most likely because I am going to be 45 and my Dh will be 48...GULP...did I just put that in writing  

This is the second marriage for us both and when I was younger, I "thought" I wanted kids because it was the thing to do right....get married, have kids...

It just did not turn out that way.  Instead I was married the first time for 1 year.  I was married at 21 and divorced at 22.  I did not get married again until I was 39! The time in between was filled with great jobs, lots of fun and travel and a hot guy or two  Yes I had fun with a capital F.  During that time my friends were getting married and having kids...so along with that came the prefix to when are you having kids which is "when are you going to settle down"?  Which IMHO is even worse that the kid question.  My friends lived vicariously thru me.  Their big "escape" was to come to my apartment and have coffee. I always knew I wanted a different kind of life and I would meet someone just like me...and I did. 

My DH and I have been married for 5 years (he does not have children either) and we are very happy.  We have been able to do things and take risks financially that we would not have been able to do if we had children.  We own our home, have our own business - (that was the financial risk we took)  We travel a lot for fun -  we just returned from a 3 week long vacation, and have 4 more to go for this year.  Our business does not require a store or employees, just a laptop and cell phone.  We go out for romantic dinners often, drive very expensive cars, go to the beach on nice days,we have everything we want.  My day starts with my DH making juice and we are off to the health club where I have a personal trainer. We are never bored, even though it is like we are semi retired.  We live close to NYC, so we go when we want or go to the beach on a nice day or to the mall and buy stupid stuff or out for a great lunch.  We have a great family and lots of friends.  Our life is full and rewarding, but that is waht works for us.  We are also extremely generous to our family friends and charity.  We live a great life, and I know if we had children to think about their needs would come first and we never would have been able to make the decisions we did to get where we are.

I do not think we are selfish or self centered.  I think some people have children for all the reasons.  It is not that I don't like kids, I just don't like the idea of being a mother at this stage of my life.  I know in my heart and soul that I would not be able to deal with play dates, soccer, karate, dance, religion class, teacher meetings, homework, softball, baseball, brownies, girl scout cookies, science projects, doctors, dentists well you get the idea....
Having kids does not gurantee you grandchildren, or a great family or security when you get older. 

So as I see it, people should just mind their own business.  They made their choices in life, now it's your turn.  No matter what you choose all that matters is that you are happy and fufilled.


Also, we love the fact that we look 10 years younger than our real age....I think it's because we don't have kids  


So that is my long tale of why I don't have kids.  I know it's longer than some, but I am older!


----------



## maddhatir

druidia said:
			
		

> We also enjoy the freedom of our lifestyle, and are not interested in giving that up.  I know I am not cut out to be a parent.  I'm not motherly towards children, I cannot communicate with them, they completely do not interest me.  Harsh, but true.




DITTO RIGHT HERE!  

I am soo not motherly--- when i look at kids- i just think in my head "i dont get it!"-- and then quickly think "thank god thats not me!"  then just go about my merry way!...my nice and peacful merry way!


----------



## eeyoregon

Hats off to you for knowing what you want and don't want in life!!  I am the proud mother of two sons ages 10 and 13.  I wanted to be a Mom from the time I could talk.  My sister is my polar opposite and I have complete respect for her and her choice.  Luckily she found her sole mate and he did not want kids either.  My sister is also type 1 diabetic and my brother-in-law carries the lupus gene and has arthritis so there was NO way they were going to pro-create.

At age 33, after 10+ years of marriage, she approached her longtime OBGYN to discuss having her tubes tied.  His response was repulsive!  He made comments like, "Hmm, I've been waiting years for you to come to your senses and start your family."  And "your poor husband..." and so on!!!!  Needless to say, she has a new GYN!!

So sad that soooooo many people choose to have kids for all of the wrong reasons.  You really should have to get a permit/license to have kids - sure would cut down on the abuse and neglect of our precious kids.


----------



## goofie4goofy

maddhatir said:
			
		

> DITTO RIGHT HERE!
> 
> I am soo not motherly--- when i look at kids- i just think in my head "i dont get it!"-- and then quickly think "thank god thats not me!"  then just go about my merry way!...my nice and peacful merry way!


----------



## Two4Disney

Too many people have kids just because they think it's the thing to do. The important thing is to find out what you are meant to do and whether you really should have kids. And just because you choose not to have kids doesn't mean you don't love them and support them any way you can.


----------



## Alex2kMommy

There was a lovely older woman in my neighborhood when I was growing up.  Her name was Mary Ellen and she was a retired flight attendant.  She flew until she was at least well into her 50s, maybe even 60s!  Anyway, she lived on her own in her little house with the beautiful yard, and would invite kids from the neighborhood over to play.  We played in the backyard and also in her garage, which was filled with toys of all kinds!  She clearly loved kids, but loved her career and independence (and little red sportscar!) even more.

Kids are a lot of work (at least my two boys are!), so hats off to those who decided being a great 'auntie' or 'uncle' was enough for them.


----------



## DisneyClay

I am in my early thirties and there is nothing I wont do to become pregnant. I will do whatever it takes. I find those of us who do not have kids yet get the same treatment as those who do not want kids. I always get your wasteing time women can only have kids so long, my fave you don't have kids yet, your running out of time. Good luck to all of us. So yes I know how ya feel.


----------



## maddhatir

Alex2kMommy said:
			
		

> Kids are a lot of work (at least my two boys are!), so hats off to those who decided being a great 'auntie' or 'uncle' was enough for them.



DH and I chose not have have kids- and now we have 1 niece and 2 nephews. I LOVE buying them things- and my husband does not say a word b/c he told me we make out better spending the money on them instead of having our own kids.....ITS CHEAPER!


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## plgrn

DH and I married young (20 and 22) and have been married for four years. We feel as though having a child right now would interfere with major life goals that we are trying to accomplish. I would love to have children one day, but today is NOT THAT DAY.  

I am an only child, and DH is the last male in the USA to carry on our really weird last name so we are asked on almost a daily basis when we will have kids. It's gotten so bad, that I started a blog just to record all the comments!

I've tried everything but being downright nasty to people when they ask, but that approach isn't too far around the corner!


----------



## Ember

plgrn said:
			
		

> DH and I married young (20 and 22) and have been married for four years. We feel as though having a child right now would interfere with major life goals that we are trying to accomplish. I would love to have children one day, but today is NOT THAT DAY.
> 
> I am an only child, and DH is the last male in the USA to carry on our really weird last name so we are asked on almost a daily basis when we will have kids. It's gotten so bad, that I started a blog just to record all the comments!
> 
> I've tried everything but being downright nasty to people when they ask, but that approach isn't too far around the corner!



Put your hand to your forehead dramatically and say, "Alas!  My womb is barren!"  This is not only entertaining, most people don't have a clue what to say back.  (This has become my standard response to the kid questions)


----------



## plgrn

I am so trying that! Of course, now that I have a cool response, no one will ask.


----------



## WillCAD

plgrn said:
			
		

> I am so trying that! Of course, now that I have a cool response, no one will ask.



As the infinitely wise old Mr. Miagi once said to Daniel-san:

_*Either way, problem solved.*_


----------



## kkevcamsmom

Personally I think it's rude for people to pry into others lives like that.  Yes I have kids, 3, they are fun and wonderful and drive me up the wall...lol  On the flip side I am asked "Why so many?"  Umm I am from a family of 6 kids...  

My sister and her DH decided not to have kids, she had some issues with her cycles and it was just too much work.  They get asked constantly why they don't want any.  My sister finally started asking "Why do you care?"
My DBIL comes back with "We are still enjoying the practice stage."   

Don't let other people decided your future, you know best what makes you happy.  I have known since I was 12 that I wanted kids, just as my sister knew at the same age that she never wanted kids.

Lori


----------



## plgrn

I've thought of giving a blank stare and asking, "How do you make a baby? We haven't figured that out yet."   

Kudos to you for your view. DH's sisters have TONS of children (i often refer to them as "breeders" lol) and they are constantly being frowned on for having more children and asked "when they are going to stop."

I am annoyed by their choice, but would never say anything to them about it b/c IT'S NONE OF MY BUSINESS. It's a free country, not communist China. Mind you, if they ever ask "when are you going to get pregnant", I would have to retaliate with "when are you going to stop!!"


----------



## cosmo531

plgrn said:
			
		

> . It's gotten so bad, that I started a blog just to record all the comments!
> 
> I've tried everything but being downright nasty to people when they ask, but that approach isn't too far around the corner!




my wife and i deal with this every day!  would love to read your blog!


----------



## plgrn

cosmo531 said:
			
		

> my wife and i deal with this every day!  would love to read your blog!



Jenn's "no we are not pregnant so get over it journal"

People in general have been gracious enough to cut us some slack over the past 3 years for not having children. Apparently 4 years is their absolute limit for tolerating our decision not to be "breeders"for a few more years.This used to iritate me, but now I find it amusing. So amusing, that I plan to use this blog to keep record of all the subtle and not so subtle family planning comments we get on an almost daily basis. Let's get started.

4-20-06 "When are ya'll going to start trying?"

4-26-06 "You know ya'll really aren't natural. The natural course of things is to have babies after gettting married. It's what most people do."

4-27-06 "If you don't start having kids, there's not going to be anyone to take care of you when you are old."

4-29-06 "It's been 4 years already? Wow, when are you going to start having kids?"

5-2-06 "Since you're not going to give us any grandkids, I'm might as well spoil someone!" (in reference to a 4 year-old family member).

5-10-06 "You have to have kids if you are going to be happy!" - from my 4 year-old cousin LOL

5-12-06 "No little ones for you yet??!!"

5-14-06 "Happy Mother's Day. Will that be true for you anytime soon?"

5-21-06 "Just picked this up at a yard sale for you" -- a baby name book!

5-31-06 "Oh that looks soooo natural!" (while I was holding a friend's baby)

6-6-06 "I might as well [do what I'm going to do]. It's not like you're going to give me any grandkids!


Please leave me a comment with creative ways to inform people of our child-free choice. So far I've come up with, "I was bathed in acid raid as a toddler, so I'm sterile." That's my only really good one. The goal is to have a snappy fresh retort for every nosy person who graces us with their opinion. 


BTW, I do plan to have children (whether biological or adopted we haven't decided yet) so don't think I'm a bitter cranky feminist please. I just think it's crazy that people start thinking something is wrong with you if you haven't had a child within the first three years of a marriage.


----------



## i_hrt_mickey

DH and I will be celebrating our 20th annversary this year, and I still hear how come you never had children.  My reply use to be we will have children when the stork flies over our house, now it is we never had children b/c the storke never flew over our house.....  
I beleive that the world revolves around me and I am shelfish.  I like to sleep when I want to and I when I want to go somewhere I want to just grab my purse and keys and go.... Not move my whole house to visit someone for 2 hours....  
However , I have a 10 yr old niece how beleives we belong to her and we are happy spoiling her.  If we had children we could not afford to spoil her...


----------



## Alex2kMommy

plgrn said:
			
		

> Jenn's "no we are not pregnant so get over it journal"


Jenn, these are a hoot!  We married when I was nearing 30, so the first comment I got was actually on my wedding day; I said, "Could we please just get through today first?"  Sheesh.  After 2.5 years of marriage we began trying, then endured years of infertility treatments and even more rude comments, from those who had no idea we were trying, and from those who did:  "Are you sure you're doing it right?!"  (Joking, of course, but painful nonetheless.)

I never did have a snappy comeback, but at your age I was interested in establishing a career, and later a solid foundation in my marriage before even thinking of children.   Even if you aren't working your way up the ladder in some fabulous career, I think the 20s should be a time of self discovery, enjoying personal interests, being a couple, and doing all those things (traveling!) that we tend to push aside once kids come along and finances and free time get tighter.  

Tell people you have a few personal goals you'd like to achieve before you begin your family, because once you have children, you don't want to regret never having the chance.  _And mean it_.  I would think anyone who had children would understand.  Good luck!

PS.  Just re-read your post that you have goals you want to accomplish...yadda yadda.  So I guess my idea won't help you after all.  Hang in there, girl.  I think you're both brilliant for waiting!


----------



## Goobergal99

We have a similar problem. We chose to only have one child (well in all honesty DD was not actually planned as I was a senior in highschool when she came into my life) However, as DH and I have grown up and matured we have decided that we are very content with our one child life. PPL constantly ask when we are going to have another one and my response is always the same " We are totally content with one child and besides less mouths to feed means more Disney trips  " 

No but seriously, It is no one's business, I have taken my moms advice and started telling ppl that we have really been trying but it just isn't happening for us. You should see the look on some ppl's faces, classic guilt   
I am sorry but I want my DD all to myself just like I had my mom all to myself (yep I am a spoiled rotten only child/ italian  ) and eventually when all my friends are just starting to have their kids, I will be all finished earning my degrees and my DD will be all grown up and DH and I are gonna travel....... to Disney three times a year instead of once


----------



## kennancat

I wonder why some people get comments about it and some don't. DH and have been married just over 4 years (we're both 31), and we'll get the occasional "are you thinking of having kids soon", but nobody really pushes us on it and I've certainly never gotten any nasty comments about it. It's funny - I think I've became a bit overly sensitive about being asked because I hear what other people get put through, even though it's never happened to me personally. I do wonder if we'll get more pressure as we get closer to our mid- to late-thirties.


----------



## Ember

My second standard responce (for the nastier comments) is: "there are much better ways to contribute to humanity then simply by adding to it."

Interesting research has been done in the area of happiness that shows that a couple is happiest when they first marry.  Happiness then drops when children are born.  Happiness does not come back up to the previous high level until the children have moved out.  (**If anyone needs I can find all the citations to this, I just couldn't be bothered at the moment.)  Interesting, no?


----------



## plgrn

Goobergal99 said:
			
		

> We are totally content with one child and besides less mouths to feed means more Disney trips



Yes! Good point.


----------



## plgrn

Alex2kMommy said:
			
		

> Even if you aren't working your way up the ladder in some fabulous career, I think the 20s should be a time of self discovery, enjoying personal interests, being a couple, and doing all those things (traveling!) that we tend to push aside once kids come along and finances and free time get tighter.
> 
> Tell people you have a few personal goals you'd like to achieve before you begin your family, because once you have children, you don't want to regret never having the chance.  _And mean it_.  I would think anyone who had children would understand.  Good luck!



Thank you for the beautiful words of encouragement! There are days when I really want kids, but I know that there are things to accomplish in my 20's. And has anybody noticed that people are having kids just because it is the trendy thing to do?? Take almost all of Hollywood for example. You'd think a baby was the latest accessory like a hand bag or something!   It seems regular Americans outside of Hollywood are following the trend also.


----------



## plgrn

So who has furbabies that they treat like children? Come on. 'fess up!   

I have 3 cats and a dog who I have spoiled ROTTEN.


----------



## Alex2kMommy

Ember said:
			
		

> My second standard responce (for the nastier comments) is: "there are much better ways to contribute to humanity then simply by adding to it."
> 
> Interesting research has been done in the area of happiness that shows that a couple is happiest when they first marry.  Happiness then drops when children are born.  Happiness does not come back up to the previous high level until the children have moved out.  (**If anyone needs I can find all the citations to this, I just couldn't be bothered at the moment.)  Interesting, no?


I loved this whole post.  Your reply about contributing to humanity rather than adding to it is wonderful, and so true!

And I've heard about marital happiness levels dropping during the childrearing years.  Again, anyone who already has children should know exactly why - It is so hard!  In my opinion, it is the toughest (yet also the most rewarding) job in the world, even for those who go in with their eyes wide open.  

I, too, shudder at the babies who seem to be 'accessories' to their parents, and the parents' cavalier treatment of their child's physical or mental well-being.  Driving a convertible with an infant in your lap?  Getting pregnant to 'save' your failing relationship?  Not realizing that a child will _change_ your relationship with the guy who wants sex 8 times a day?  Thank goodness most people have more sense than this!


----------



## SusanWasHere

plgrn said:
			
		

> So who has furbabies that they treat like children? Come on. 'fess up!
> 
> I have 3 cats and a dog who I have spoiled ROTTEN.



i have 3 angels i love more than life itself!  see below    i am 35, single, never married, no kids.  i had 2 live-in boyfriends in my life and wow - that was plenty!!    like the old adage goes - you don't know someone until you live with them!  so now when people say "are you married yet?", my response is "why, do i look miserable?".  it is so funny to see their reactions!    and i'm a spec ed teacher, with kids all day long, i don't want one at home.  i like to visit elephants at the zoo, but don't want one in my living room!    when people get really rude about how i should have kids and how i am basically i am not a complete human/woman/person until i give birth, i tell them i had my uterus removed as a child bc of an bicycle accident.  their mouths hit the floor.  lol!!    they should mind their business!!  i am so happy this thread was started and to see so many women in the same boat as me, it feels so good to see it.    i own my own home, car, no more student loans, no credit debt, dvc owner, all on my own.  i'm a great aunt, a great teacher, and a great cat owner.  that should count for something.    why do people think that bc without a husband or a kid i don't count as much????


----------



## susancl

I haven't read all the threads, so please forgive me if I restate something already said.

This is a free country.  If you don't want to have children, you don't have to.

When people ask when you are having kids, they don't ask to put the pressure on or to be mean.  They ask because they want to hear your good news and share your life (in conversation).   It's natural to think that a married couple would want children.


----------



## my4kids

Do you all realize that this thread has been around so long that the OP could have conceived and given birth since it was started? She could be starting a thread on the Families Board right now that is titled " I used to think I didn't want kids but now tell me if I should buy the Peg Perego or the Maclaren stroller"


----------



## fakereadhed

my4kids said:
			
		

> Do you all realize that this thread has been around so long that the OP could have conceived and given birth since it was started? She could be starting a thread on the Families Board right now that is titled " I used to think I didn't want kids but now tell me if I should buy the Peg Perego or the Maclaren stroller"



 



I have 3 kids(and had the last at 38-you should hear the comments I got on that one  )but the reason people with kids want you to have some is simple. _People always want you to be as miserable as they are._  They can't stand they fact that you are breaking tradition, when they just went along with it and never gave it a thought and now they have been:a)up all night b)working a job they don't really like because they have to support the kids c)running around all evening to soccer, swimming, dance, and T-ball d)fill in the blank with some obligation. Having kids is rewarding, but a tough job. Underneath their concern for you missing out on something is the underlying feeling that you are getting away with something here. Nobody likes a cheater.


----------



## Hillbeans

fakereadhed said:
			
		

> I have 3 kids(and had the last at 38-you should hear the comments I got on that one  )but the reason people with kids want you to have some is simple. _People always want you to be as miserable as they are._  They can't stand they fact that you are breaking tradition, when they just went along with it and never gave it a thought and now they have been:a)up all night b)working a job they don't really like because they have to support the kids c)running around all evening to soccer, swimming, dance, and T-ball d)fill in the blank with some obligation. Having kids is rewarding, but a tough job. Underneath their concern for you missing out on something is the underlying feeling that you are getting away with something here. Nobody likes a cheater.



LOL - that is the funniest, most true comment i've read about parenthood in a very long time. Thanks for the morning smile!


----------



## pearlieq

fakereadhed said:
			
		

> I have 3 kids(and had the last at 38-you should hear the comments I got on that one  )but the reason people with kids want you to have some is simple. _People always want you to be as miserable as they are._  They can't stand they fact that you are breaking tradition, when they just went along with it and never gave it a thought and now they have been:a)up all night b)working a job they don't really like because they have to support the kids c)running around all evening to soccer, swimming, dance, and T-ball d)fill in the blank with some obligation. Having kids is rewarding, but a tough job. Underneath their concern for you missing out on something is the underlying feeling that you are getting away with something here. Nobody likes a cheater.



That's exactly it!  Very insightful and well put!


----------



## SusanWasHere

fakereadhed said:
			
		

> I have 3 kids(and had the last at 38-you should hear the comments I got on that one  )but the reason people with kids want you to have some is simple. _People always want you to be as miserable as they are._  They can't stand they fact that you are breaking tradition, when they just went along with it and never gave it a thought and now they have been:a)up all night b)working a job they don't really like because they have to support the kids c)running around all evening to soccer, swimming, dance, and T-ball d)fill in the blank with some obligation. Having kids is rewarding, but a tough job. Underneath their concern for you missing out on something is the underlying feeling that you are getting away with something here. Nobody likes a cheater.



i think you are right.  i get a lot of bitterness from my friends with kids that is really annoying.    if i ever DARE to say i'm tired i get "how can you be tired, you don't have kids".  or i'll say my cat woke me up and i couldn't get back to sleep so i'm beat.  "oh, try having kids, then you'll be tired".   the one day i finally blew up and said "it doesn't matter if i'm tired from a baby, a cat, my neighbor's music, a cold, etc.  I'M PLAIN OLD TIRED.  one thing doesn't make you more tired than the other".    another friend was saying she has no food in the house and i said i didn't either, hadn't shopped in a while.  and she said "yeah but you don't have a kid".  UM WE BOTH DON'T HAVE FOOD, WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE???    so i do think it is (most of the time, not all) that they are miserable with their choices, overstressed, etc. and take it out on me bc i'm not?  and that's a shame.  but still, having people yell that i shouldn't be late to work or stuck in traffic bc i don't have kids makes no sense and it is ANNOYING!!!  i guess they think i sit around and eat bon bons all day and pamper myself?  lol, i wish!!!


----------



## plgrn

SusanWasHere said:
			
		

> i like to visit elephants at the zoo, but don't want one in my living room!



    

BTW, your "kids" are beautiful!! Are the two on the left Russian Blues? I have a Russian Blue mix who is gorgeous, but a handful!


----------



## plgrn

So this is really trite, but does anyone every worry that once the biological clock has stopped, that they will regret the decision not to have any kids? I can just see myself in the retirement home rolling my eyes while all my eldery friends discuss their grandkids.


----------



## plgrn

I've been inspired to start a furbaby brag thread in the community boards. Would love to see everyone's "kids."


----------



## WDWguru

plgrn said:
			
		

> So this is really trite, but does anyone every worry that once the biological clock has stopped, that they will regret the decision not to have any kids? I can just see myself in the retirement home rolling my eyes while all my eldery friends discuss their grandkids.



Not for one second. And even if it were to happen, I'd much rather regret not having any than resent a child I did have. As for the elderly friends, they're much more likely to be complaining about how their children/grandchildren never visit than anything else!

For those of you just joining in, I thought I'd point out the sorta companion thread to this one - the Childfree Disers check-in. Pop on over and post, it's been a while! 

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=316553


----------



## pearlieq

plgrn said:
			
		

> So this is really trite, but does anyone every worry that once the biological clock has stopped, that they will regret the decision not to have any kids?



Honestly, yes, this has crossed my mind, which is part of the reason we're not 100% decided either way yet.  I wonder if I'll be more interested when I'm older, and I do wonder whether I would regret not having them once it's too late.  I'm not sure I would, but I definitely wonder...


----------



## SusanWasHere

plgrn said:
			
		

> BTW, your "kids" are beautiful!! Are the two on the left Russian Blues? I have a Russian Blue mix who is gorgeous, but a handful!



thank you so much   the 2 on the left are blues.  they are mom and daughter.  absolute sweethearts and loves!  the demon seed on the right is a seal point.  AKA "soon to be given to Shing Loon and turned into someone's dinner"     LOL, just kidding of course.  i could never   she is a major handful and i love her to death!! she got the wrong brain cells somehow - she thinks she is a dog.  and a bad dog at that


----------



## my4kids

WDWguru said:
			
		

> Not for one second. And even if it were to happen, I'd much rather regret not having any than resent a child I did have. As for the elderly friends, they're much more likely to be complaining about how their children/grandchildren never visit than anything else!
> 
> For those of you just joining in, I thought I'd point out the sorta companion thread to this one - the Childfree Disers check-in. Pop on over and post, it's been a while!
> 
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=316553




I'm not trying to     -  I just noticed that you when you said "rather regret not having any than resent a child I have"  - I just have to put in that I hear this alot..especially on this thread    and I must say as a woman who has had 2 unplanned, and unexpected pregnancies, I really can not imagine any person who is not mentally ill in some way actually resenting their own child, no matter what the circumstances are...(I am not implying you are ill - just that you can not realize this without kids of your own).yes I was thrown for a loop on both of them (especially the first).  Yes, I resented the circumstances for a while, but resent the child?????!!! Holy cow, immediately after their birth I was Thanking the Dear Lord in Heaven that he knew me better than myself and blessed me with these angels that even I did not know I wanted but He knew that I wanted)  

I am not saying this to try to tell anyone they should have kids....I think that is a very personal decision and if you don't want them, that's fine, you shouldn't have them, and shouldn't have to answer to anyone about it.   I just don't think that any healthy person would resent their own child.....so don't let that be the reason you don't have any.


----------



## FayeW

my4kids said:
			
		

> I'm not trying to     -  I just noticed that you when you said "rather regret not having any than resent a child I have"  - I just have to put in that I hear this alot..especially on this thread    and I must say as a woman who has had 2 unplanned, and unexpected pregnancies, I really can not imagine any person who is not mentally ill in some way actually resenting their own child, no matter what the circumstances are...(I am not implying you are ill - just that you can not realize this without kids of your own).yes I was thrown for a loop on both of them (especially the first).  Yes, I resented the circumstances for a while, but resent the child?????!!! Holy cow, immediately after their birth I was Thanking the Dear Lord in Heaven that he knew me better than myself and blessed me with these angels that even I did not know I wanted but He knew that I wanted)
> 
> I am not saying this to try to tell anyone they should have kids....I think that is a very personal decision and if you don't want them, that's fine, you shouldn't have them, and shouldn't have to answer to anyone about it.   I just don't think that any healthy person would resent their own child.....so don't let that be the reason you don't have any.



I sometimes resent being a parent. I love my children, but there are days when I really regret that we didn't stick to our decision not to have children.  Particularily when they are fistfighting in the kitchen at 7:00 am on a Saturday morning. I have literally counted the days until my oldest goes to university, and can live in the dorm. (She is a pre-teen ball of hormones and attitude, so I bet there are some other mothers who can relate...).  I don't think that makes me mentally ill...I think that just make me normal.


----------



## RedxPanda

Krissalee said:
			
		

> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!



I am quickly jumping into the same boat.  Of course I have it a little easier now, I just have the when are you getting married?   I'm sick of it enough that I want to say screw it to all of them   Let's just go to Vegas and get it over with, and see a Circque du Soleil while we're at it   

Dbf was a little miffed when he finally realized, when I had been saying all along I can't stand little bratty kids and I really don't want any for myself, that I was actually telling the truth!  I was the oldest of all the cousins on my mom's side, so naturally I was the babysitter of the summer   He is slowly adjusting himself to "understand" where I am coming from.  He still gets angry because he doesn't get why I feel like I do.  Like I'm supposed to verablize it somehow?!?

I just don't feel that "need" deep down inside of me, instead I feel the need of living my life for me, since I've worked so hard in school to get where I am.


----------



## kcrew

Krissalee said:
			
		

> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!



I married at 23 and on my 10th anniversary still hadn't given any thought to having children.  I was never a "kid" person and just didn't feel at all compelled to have my own.  I never said "never", but just felt if it was to be I would "feel" it.  Well,  after I had been married 12 years (age 35) I "felt" it.  I got pregnant immediately and shocked everyone! (They all assumed it was an "accident" at that point.)  I proceeded to have 3 sons in 3 years....and yes, everyday is a challenge, but I don't regret my decision.  If this feeling never develops in you then stand by your choice and feel good about it!  I wouldn't really give any thought to other people's questions...it's just normal curiousity, and if you have made your decision you should not feel uncomfortable about your choice, nor about discussing it with others.  I'm sure that when others draw you into a debate that in part they envy your decision and are trying to convince themselves that kids were the only way to go....


----------



## kkevcamsmom

my4kids said:
			
		

> I'm not trying to     -  I just noticed that you when you said "rather regret not having any than resent a child I have"  - I just have to put in that I hear this alot..especially on this thread    and I must say as a woman who has had 2 unplanned, and unexpected pregnancies, I really can not imagine any person who is not mentally ill in some way actually resenting their own child, no matter what the circumstances are...(I am not implying you are ill - just that you can not realize this without kids of your own).yes I was thrown for a loop on both of them (especially the first).  Yes, I resented the circumstances for a while, but resent the child?????!!! Holy cow, immediately after their birth I was Thanking the Dear Lord in Heaven that he knew me better than myself and blessed me with these angels that even I did not know I wanted but He knew that I wanted)
> 
> I am not saying this to try to tell anyone they should have kids....I think that is a very personal decision and if you don't want them, that's fine, you shouldn't have them, and shouldn't have to answer to anyone about it.   I just don't think that any healthy person would resent their own child.....so don't let that be the reason you don't have any.




I think you did want to cause a stir, otherwise you would have not made this comment.

As someonewho does home daycare I am with my kids 24/7.  I love each one dearly but there are times when I want a break.  How nice would it be to go to the pool and just relax??  I have no clue, don't remember...

Also as someone who does a daycare I have to take a class on reporting child abuse, this is a very intense class that is hard to take!  We get to see photos of abused kids, read police reports...all that 'fun' stuff.  The one's that stick out the most in my head are the moms and dads that say they never wanted the kids can the State please take them away before it gets worse.  These are parents that felt pressured to have kids and gave in to that pressure and resented their kid.  Are they mentally ill...No.  They just were not cut out to be parents but gave in to the pressure.  Yes there are parents out there that do resent the kids they have, that they NEVER wanted to have, in the first place.  

Is my sister mentally ill for not wanting kids...NO in fact, she's very smart, kind, sweet and wonderful with kids actually.  But had NO desire to have one.

I think to suggest someone is metally ill for not wanting to have kids is just plain mean.

I applaude the people here who stick to their guns.  Plain and simple, some people just dont' feel the need to have kids, others feel the need to have as many as possible.  Each has that right.  Some may think people with more than 1, 2, 3, or 4 kids are mentally ill.  Some think that less than 5 is not enough.  To each their own. 

Lori


----------



## faeflora

My husband and I have been married for 15 years now and we decided very early on in our marriage not to have children.  We both knew when we married we had different goals then a family.  I wanted to finish my BA and he wanted to go to graduate school.  We are also enjoy the quiet time in the mornings and unwinding slowly when we get home from work or school.  I was diagnosed with my disability five years into the marriage and at that point we were both very happy that we decided not to have a family.  Managing kids and a health crisis would have been a lot to deal with.  We have never regretted our decision to not have a baby.  We are very much in love and when we are asked why we decided not to do the traditional family thing we reply that for us it was ust not the right decision.  The conversation normally ends there.
We do have two cats who occupy our days and five nieces whom we love dearly.
I am very happy with the way our lives turned out. Plus, if you asked my husband he would tell you that I am the child in the family since I love Disney, all things Tinkerbell and have never let my childlike spirit die.


----------



## Barbers2005

> I really can not imagine any person who is not mentally ill in some way actually resenting their own child, no matter what the circumstances are...
> 
> I just don't think that any healthy person would resent their own child


I had to laugh when I saw this quote.  I have a Dd4 and will admit that when she was born, I was resentful.  As a new parent, I thought "OMG!  Where is the rosy-hued mother-daughter bliss that I was promised?  What is wrong with me?"  Feeling totally guilty and burdened with my newfound knowledge that I was a defective woman, I sought professional help (family counselor suggested by the hospital).  Guess what?  Feeling resentful (and guilty) is a totally common and perfectly natural part of being a parent.  "Why wouldn't you be resentful?", I was told.  This tiny stranger made you sick, fat, poor and tired.  Every time she opens her mouth, she expects you to run to her with food, diapers and snuggles...regardless of what you're doing or how you feel.  The other perfectly normal part of parental resentment?  It passes.  So, do I sometimes feel resentful?  Yeah.  Do I let Dd see it?  No.  Do I love being a parent?  Absolutely.

To get back on topic- I think its very difficult to provide a *logical* reason for a decision that is based on *feelings*.  Asking someone why they didn't (or did) want children is like asking "why is green your favorite color?" or "why do you love your spouse?"  There is no answer that you can articulate- nothing will adequately justify your answer to someone else.


----------



## kennancat

my4kids said:
			
		

> I just noticed that you when you said "rather regret not having any than resent a child I have"  - I just have to put in that I hear this alot..especially on this thread    and I must say as a woman who has had 2 unplanned, and unexpected pregnancies, I really can not imagine any person who is not mentally ill in some way actually resenting their own child, no matter what the circumstances are... <snip>just don't think that any healthy person would resent their own child.....so don't let that be the reason you don't have any.



I'm probably one of the people who said this as well. My mom frequently counters this one with, "oh, but when it's your kid, you can't help but love them." To which I remind her how overworked the Department of Children and Families is in this state - and it's not because all of these parents just love their kids so much. I do you think you need to be emotionally prepared and willing to make the commitment and sacrifices necessary to parent a child. I think it's great that you were able to go from not being prepared to become pregnant to loving and welcoming your children into your life. I really do hope that that's what happens for the majority of people who find themselves in that situation, but sadly I don't think it happens for all. I don't think it's fair to make a blanket statement that those people are mentally ill - I think they just weren't wired for it. Plus, I think some people are better at adjusting when life throws them a curve ball than others.


----------



## kennancat

kkevcamsmom said:
			
		

> Is my sister mentally ill for not wanting kids...NO in fact, she's very smart, kind, sweet and wonderful with kids actually.  But had NO desire to have one.
> 
> I think to suggest someone is metally ill for not wanting to have kids is just plain mean.



Wait, I think you're misunderstanding here - my4kids was talking about people who have children resenting those children, not saying that people who don't want children are mentally ill. I don't agree with her opinion, but look on the bright side: I wish more people who had unplanned children could grow to love them so much that they would think there was something wrong with people who didn't feel that way. I bet we'd hear a lot less about child abuse on the news.


----------



## fakereadhed

kennancat said:
			
		

> I'm probably one of the people who said this as well. My mom frequently counters this one with, "oh, but when it's your kid, you can't help but love them." To which I remind her how overworked the Department of Children and Families is in this state - and it's not because all of these parents just love their kids so much. I do you think you need to be emotionally prepared and willing to make the commitment and sacrifices necessary to parent a child. I think it's great that you were able to go from not being prepared to become pregnant to loving and welcoming your children into your life. I really do hope that that's what happens for the majority of people who find themselves in that situation, but sadly I don't think it happens for all. I don't think it's fair to make a blanket statement that those people are mentally ill - I think they just weren't wired for it. Plus, I think some people are better at adjusting when life throws them a curve ball than others.



ITA!  

 I am continually amazed at the closed-minded attitudes that people seem to have about EVERYTHING when I read posts. No wonder people make insensitive comments about people that don't have kids, have too many kids, stay at value resorts(JK)...they can't imagine someone having a life other than their own. Everyone has their own experiences and that doesn't make them wrong or mentally ill, either.


----------



## kkevcamsmom

kennancat said:
			
		

> Wait, I think you're misunderstanding here - my4kids was talking about people who have children resenting those children, not saying that people who don't want children are mentally ill. I don't agree with her opinion, but look on the bright side: I wish more people who had unplanned children could grow to love them so much that they would think there was something wrong with people who didn't feel that way. I bet we'd hear a lot less about child abuse on the news.




My bad, I did mis-read that!  I still think that it's mean to suggest mental illness the only reason to resent your kids though.


----------



## my4kids

kennancat said:
			
		

> I'm probably one of the people who said this as well. My mom frequently counters this one with, "oh, but when it's your kid, you can't help but love them." To which I remind her how overworked the Department of Children and Families is in this state - and it's not because all of these parents just love their kids so much. I do you think you need to be emotionally prepared and willing to make the commitment and sacrifices necessary to parent a child. I think it's great that you were able to go from not being prepared to become pregnant to loving and welcoming your children into your life. I really do hope that that's what happens for the majority of people who find themselves in that situation, but sadly I don't think it happens for all. I don't think it's fair to make a blanket statement that those people are mentally ill - I think they just weren't wired for it. Plus, I think some people are better at adjusting when life throws them a curve ball than others.




I think it is normal to resent your situation, resent that a pregnancy made you drop out of school, resent that you gained weight from it, resent your financial situation.  I resented  A WHOLE LOT of things when I was pregnant the first time.  I especially resented other pregnant girls or new moms who seemed to have things much easier than me.  (It wasn't their fault and they probably didn't deserve my resentment, but I still resented them)  I resented people that looked happy even.  I also think it is normal to resent when your children fight or whine or are sloppy.   What I meant by my original post was resenting the actual child for being born.  I think alot of people are getting defensive when it is not needed.   I too think it is normal to be ticked off about a situation, but ticked off at the baby? Yes, I think that there are people who do resent their own children and are mad at them for being born, but I stand by orignal statement that it is not normal.  Maybe it is common, but not healthy and definately not right.


----------



## my4kids

kkevcamsmom said:
			
		

> I think you did want to cause a stir, otherwise you would have not made this comment.
> 
> As someonewho does home daycare I am with my kids 24/7.  I love each one dearly but there are times when I want a break.  How nice would it be to go to the pool and just relax??  I have no clue, don't remember...
> 
> Also as someone who does a daycare I have to take a class on reporting child abuse, this is a very intense class that is hard to take!  We get to see photos of abused kids, read police reports...all that 'fun' stuff.  The one's that stick out the most in my head are the moms and dads that say they never wanted the kids can the State please take them away before it gets worse.  These are parents that felt pressured to have kids and gave in to that pressure and resented their kid.  Are they mentally ill...No.  They just were not cut out to be parents but gave in to the pressure.  Yes there are parents out there that do resent the kids they have, that they NEVER wanted to have, in the first place.
> 
> Is my sister mentally ill for not wanting kids...NO in fact, she's very smart, kind, sweet and wonderful with kids actually.  But had NO desire to have one.
> 
> I think to suggest someone is metally ill for not wanting to have kids is just plain mean.
> 
> I applaude the people here who stick to their guns.  Plain and simple, some people just dont' feel the need to have kids, others feel the need to have as many as possible.  Each has that right.  Some may think people with more than 1, 2, 3, or 4 kids are mentally ill.  Some think that less than 5 is not enough.  To each their own.
> 
> Lori




HOLY COW! - Do you even read a post before you go blowing your top?
I have no idea what you were reading, but it wasn't my post that you quoted.
I think it is absolutley fine to not want kids!  I even understand it! I was even there once!  I actually started having kids before I even wanted them! 
I think people who resent their kids for being born are crazy and wrong.  I am not telling you that you have to feel that way, I am just saying I feel that way.  Yes the social services system is full of kids whose parents resented them for being born.  if the parents gave in to pressure, maybe they were not mentally healthy enough to handle it.  I am not saying every kid in the system has a mentally ill parent, there are all sorts of reasons a child might end up there, I'm just saying that I personally think that it is not human nature to resent your own offspring.


----------



## snusnu

kennancat said:
			
		

> My thought has been that if we don't have kids and realize we made a mistake, we have only hurt ourselves. If we DO have kids and realize that we made a mistake, we've now dragged an innocent child into our mess. I would think most people grow to love their children even if it wasn't what they'd planned - after all, it makes sense that we would be biologically programmed to feel that way. Unfortunately, not every parent reaches that stage, as shown by the existence of government agencies like HRS. So I'm still not sure what the right answer is, but I'm glad that it is becoming more socially acceptable to make the choice that you feel is right for you, not what society expects of you.



Well said.  Neither my husband or I have ever wanted children.  We have a life built on each other and our families and friends, which makes us very happy.  I adore children, babies in general and my nephews in particular, I just have never had the desire to have one full time.  Conceiving is impossible as I can't have children, but we have discussed adoption as we have been getting a lot of pressure from certain folks close to us as they see how much I like children.  And yes, I know pressure is a terrible reason to adopt a child and we would certainly never do it for that reason.  I genuinely do love kids and we'd be good parents.  

However, I know in my heart that the life we have now is the one we want and are happiest with.  I've been working for 15 years to establish a career in opera and I couldn't have done any of the things I've done in that field with a child.  It would have been horribly unfair to the kid for his or her mother to be gone fifteen hours out of every day.  THAT would be selfish.  Thank God I have two nephews and another on the way, so the pressure is off us.


----------



## snusnu

maddhatir said:
			
		

> i would prefer a houseful of animals over a child anyday of the week--
> 
> not that i can have animals though-- i am allergic and have asthma-- HEY i wonder if we can start using THAT as an excuse for no kids!!!



It's why we have a houseful of scaly and feathery pets and no kids-I SWEAR that allergy test showed kid dander at level 4!


----------



## snusnu

my4kids said:
			
		

> I think it is normal to resent your situation, resent that a pregnancy made you drop out of school, resent that you gained weight from it, resent your financial situation.  I resented  A WHOLE LOT of things when I was pregnant the first time.  I especially resented other pregnant girls or new moms who seemed to have things much easier than me.  (It wasn't their fault and they probably didn't deserve my resentment, but I still resented them)  I resented people that looked happy even.  I also think it is normal to resent when your children fight or whine or are sloppy.   What I meant by my original post was resenting the actual child for being born.  I think alot of people are getting defensive when it is not needed.   I too think it is normal to be ticked off about a situation, but ticked off at the baby? Yes, I think that there are people who do resent their own children and are mad at them for being born, but I stand by orignal statement that it is not normal.  Maybe it is common, but not healthy and definately not right.



I have to tell you something.  I work in an academic OB/GYN department as my day job.  I was talking with an ARNP faculty member who runs education classes for nurses.  She went to a symposium on postpartum depression where they discussed symptoms, which can include resentment and anger towards your new child.  She said that the mothers in the room, medical professionals, mind you, were crying with relief as this description of a normally-occurring medical condition explained how they felt when their child was born.  Your qualification of these extreme emotions as not healthy and not right is a judgement against those who suffer, even mildly, from a recognized medical condition.  You seem to have been very lucky to have not experienced this disease, so count your blessings and be cautious to not judge.


----------



## njdisneyfreak

> Originally Posted by Krissalee
> I am 32 years old. I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children. I have never wanted to have children. Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any. We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable. They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad. I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!



You're post is so similar to my experiences.  I'll be 32 in a few months, got married at 25 and though we leave for WDW in a week, we plan to return for our 8th anniversary!  We don't plan to have any kids.  We absolutely love just being with each other and simply don't want any kids.  Though we love kids, we enjoy being aunt and uncle and getting to leave and go home to our dog (our baby).  But like you, we have dealt with a lot of incredulous looks over our decision and people thinking it's something we will get over.


----------



## kennancat

Since this thread is back, here's another question for you all - are you definitely sure you don't want kids, or are you still on the fence about it? How often do you change your mind?

For a long time, I was on the fence about the kid thing. Then a couple of months ago, I got off it and I'm now pretty sure I don't want kids. It's strange in a way - I was actually very stressed about making the right decision and it's like one morning I woke up with the decision made and a feeling of peace about it. A few of our friends have recently had their first children, and I think that's influenced me, of course. I enjoy playing with their kids, but I don't feel any particular need to have my own. It's not that I leave their homes and think, "wow, I'm so glad we don't have kids!". I just don't leave thinking, "wow, we must have kids!". It's not that I have a negative reaction; it's that I don't have a positive one, if that makes sense. DH and I are only 31, so we're certainly not going to take any steps to make that decision permanent for a while. He's comfortable with the idea of not having kids, but doesn't want to lock it in until we're older, which I completely agree with. That way if we wake up at 35 and decide we must have children, we've still got a chance  I'll admit I'm a little nervous about planning for our future. While having kids just so they'll take care of you when you're old isn't a great plan, I would say not having kids means you need to plan that out more to make sure that you'll be okay.


----------



## WDWguru

kennancat said:
			
		

> While having kids just so they'll take care of you when you're old isn't a great plan, I would say not having kids means you need to plan that out more to make sure that you'll be okay.



I would disagree. I think both situations take equal planning. In fact those with kids may even have to plan MORE. Think about how many older people you hear about in nursing homes whose children never even visit. Those with children need to plan for their own futures AND what they'll leave to their offspring (and how it's divided up). 

I knew at about 13 that I really didn't want children, but I just didn't know then that I had a choice in the matter. Once I figured that out, I was SO relieved! I did have a period right around 30 where I decided to really think it through, and came to the same conclusion I always had. The way I see it, indifference toward having children is as negative a conclusion as actively not wanting any. EVERY child should be wanted - desperatley so if possible - and as long as I don't feel that way, I won't be having any. Just think what the world would be like if only those who really truly HAD to have children had them - and how great that generation of children could be.


----------



## kennancat

WDWguru said:
			
		

> I would disagree. I think both situations take equal planning. In fact those with kids may even have to plan MORE. Think about how many older people you hear about in nursing homes whose children never even visit. Those with children need to plan for their own futures AND what they'll leave to their offspring (and how it's divided up).



I certainly wouldn't say that people with children don't need to plan - you're right about the whole trust and inheritence piece making it even more involved. However, when you think about care if you one day become unable to care for yourself, not having kids can take away the default option. For example, my husband's grandmother recently passed away. Prior to her death, she'd had several strokes resulting in severe short-term memory loss and would never have been able to care for herself. DH's mother took her to all her appointments, paid her bills, got her medications, made sure she ate enough food, etc.. That's what scares me - who will provide that kind of care for me if I reach that age and am in that state? I should also add that I'm an only child. So once my parents and DH are gone, I'm essentially alone in the world, which scares the heck out of me. Plus, having grown up in Florida, I'm constantly hearing about scams aimed at the elderly. My concern is really more that I don't feel like I have a good handle on how to plan for this. What are your plans for protecting your future, if you don't mind my asking?


----------



## Alex2kMommy

I don't think that even with children you should feel comfortable in relying on them to care for you in old age.  My mom used to work in a nursing home, and there are not a lot of visitors, it's very sad.  She used to bring us in sometimes to visit with the residents.  It broke her heart when each of her 'ladies' passed away.

Personally, I'm not counting on an 'inheritance' from my parents or DH's parents, nor am I thinking of what I can financially pass on to my children.  I am, however, wanting to make sure we are covered should DH lose his job, be disabled, or either of us should die.  I want to make sure we can send the boys to college to get a decent start in life.  (Not that you can't do well without college, I just think it's harder these days.)  And if we can enjoy the here and now along the way (like seeing Mickey for the first time this September!), that's all that matters.


----------



## WDWguru

What are my plans? Well, I hope enough at this point in my life ("only" 35). Though I have a younger sister, cousins, neices/nephews, etc, I know better than to count on relying on ANYone else in that situation, just to be safe. DH and I both have life insurance (through work and extra on the side), 401k plans and savings. My father is a lawyer so we have things set up legally to ensure not everything disappears to estate taxes and there is plenty to set either or both of us up whether we're at home and able to care for ourselves or reliant on in-home care or even a facility. That's really about all anyone can do.


----------



## TDC Nala

For as long as I can remember I have known I did not want to raise children, and I have not.  I have long term care insurance and will go into assisted living if it is necessary.

I don't believe anyone should have children because they want someone to care for them when they age. Things happen. The kids might not be able to or want to. Provide for your own needs in that area first if you can.

And no matter what you plan, you can NEVER be one hundred percent absolutely sure that you will be okay. There are no guarantees.


----------



## Alaska Catdog

When I met DH I really liked him and dreaded telling him that I was not interested in having kids.  I had to tell him when he starting talking about marriage.  Imagine my relief (and his) when he said "me too!".  I reserved the right to change my mind because I wasn't 100% sure, that was 7 years ago and I still havn't found my biological clock.  (I figure if it was ticking, I'd be able to find it.)  I like kids but I don't want them.  I am not concerned about my old age, I figure when I'm in the nursing home, I won't have anything to complain about when my kids don't visit me, cause I won't have any.  Someone before me said it best, I'll paraphrase; if a child is not absolutely wanted then the potential parent should probably wait until it is.  I've never gotten to the point where I questioned this decision, much less actually wanted a kid.  Until I really really really want one, it's just not gonna happen.    
PS when people say "you'd make such great parents" I say "I know, but I'd really hate it."  that shuts them up.


----------



## hollyb

It is said you will never hear the words. "I love you mommy: sweetest words in the English language. I will pray that you change your mind. Your very young still.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

hollyb said:
			
		

> It is said you will never hear the words. "I love you mommy: sweetest words in the English language. I will pray that you change your mind. Your very young still.



1. Not every mother hears those words. 

2. Most mothers hear many other things 100 times for every "I love you mommy".

3. I hear "I love you, Aunt Lulu" and "I love you"'s from my parents, friends, students, cousins, etc. etc. etc. "I love you" is very sweet to hear, but not just from your child.

I don't know why you can't accept that some people don't want to have children. Some people are happier that way. If you want to pray for someone, pray for the children that say "I love you mommy" to an abusive parent  or a tattered picture. Pray for the children that are alive that are unwanted, not the people who are smart enough to know what is best for themselves.


----------



## PghLybrt

LululovesDisney.... I couldnt have said it better myself...Thank you.

And not to mention what I don't have to hear (mine mine, me me, i want it, I hate you ect ect ) or what I don't have to expereince!


----------



## maddhatir

LuluLovesDisney said:
			
		

> 1. Not every mother hears those words.
> 
> 2. Most mothers hear many other things 100 times for every "I love you mommy".
> 
> 3. I hear "I love you, Aunt Lulu" and "I love you"'s from my parents, friends, students, cousins, etc. etc. etc. "I love you" is very sweet to hear, but not just from your child.
> 
> I don't know why you can't accept that some people don't want to have children. Some people are happier that way. If you want to pray for someone, pray for the children that say "I love you mommy" to an abusive parent  or a tattered picture. Pray for the children that are alive that are unwanted, not the people who are smart enough to know what is best for themselves.



AMEN TO THAT!

i have a niece and nephew- my nephew does not talk yet- but i do get to hear "i love you" from my niece-- however, my niece does not say her "Ls" very well- so what i hear is..."I YUVE YOU!" and that it just fine for me! 

never wanted kids--- never will!   NOW! I CONSIDER *MYSELF * BLESSED!


----------



## fakereadhed

hollyb said:
			
		

> It is said you will never hear the words. "I love you mommy: sweetest words in the English language. I will pray that you change your mind. Your very young still.



That would be a totally selfish reason to have kids- to have someone to love you. It's not all about you. Kids are not there for YOU, you are there for THEM.

I have kids but some of the comments to those who don't really make me


----------



## kennancat

hollyb said:
			
		

> It is said you will never hear the words. "I love you mommy: sweetest words in the English language. I will pray that you change your mind. Your very young still.



You know, I'm going to try to give hollyb the benefit of the doubt here - I'm sure you love your kids a lot and can't imagine not having them in your life. I think that's great and I wish all parents felt like that. But not everyone wants the same things out of life. My husband and I are both engineers. Do I go around trying to convince everyone that they should become an engineer? Oh, but just think of that great feeling you get when you've been working on a really tough math or programming problem and you finally figure out the solution. Uh no - that just doesn't do it for some people. Do I think that's sad or that they're missing out? No, because I realize that people are different and what means the world to one person doesn't matter to another. I'm sure someone would argue that becoming a parent is much more important and fulfilling than intellectual pursuit, and I would argue that to them it is, to me, it isn't. While hearing "I love you, mommy" may make you melt, it just doesn't strike a chord in me right now.

Bottom line: don't feel sad for me. My life is going in the path which I believe it is intended to go. Maybe one day my biological clock will wake up and I'll decide I want to be a parent - I certainly reserve the right to change my mind. But even if I don't, I believe I can have a fulfilling and wonderful life without children. I would ask that you have more of an open mind to accepting that other people value and want different things in life then you do. It doesn't make them wrong or bad, it just makes them different from you. To me, what would be sad would be living with such a narrow view of life's possibilities that you pity anyone not wanting the same experiences that you want.


----------



## WDWguru

kennancat said:
			
		

> I would ask that you have more of an open mind to accepting that other people value and want different things in life then you do. It doesn't make them wrong or bad, it just makes them different from you. To me, what would be sad would be living with such a narrow view of life's possibilities that you pity anyone not wanting the same experiences that you want.


----------



## Dina

> It is said you will never hear the words. "I love you mommy: sweetest words in the English language. I will pray that you change your mind. Your very young still.



Come on-- why would you come on here and say something like that.  This thread (from what I've seen) seemed to be created because people are frustrated in being pressured to create a lifestyle that they don't want-- and then you come on the thread and do just that??? As others have said, that's not a good reason to have kids. Why come on and say something like that? Having kids is not for everyone.

For the record, I hear your little quote sometimes, but lately more often than not I hear "I don't want to be part of this family anymore, I want a new family, one without rules" from my 6yo.  That was yesterday at the grocery, when I said no to a bag of candy  --- yeah, it Made me all warm and fuzzy.


----------



## Ragtime Gal

I never read this board but saw the thread and wanted to respond.  Hope that's okay.

I have three children, and one of them has special needs.  I love my children, but it is hard work and there are a lot of tears shed and sleepless nights, especially over my special needs child.  (Will she be able to take are of herself?  Will she be happy in life?  What will happen to her after we are gone?)

I'm glad I had children but this kind of pressure is definitely not for everyone.  You probably hate people saying how much you would like having children as much as I hate people suggesting that I was somehow chosen to be the parent of my daughter and how it will make me strong, etc.  

Do what is right for you, and know that being a parent can take a real emotional toll on you, so only do it if you are absolutely sure that you are ready to deal with whatever comes along!


----------



## maddhatir

Dina said:
			
		

> For the record, I hear your little quote sometimes, but lately more often than not I hear "I don't want to be part of this family anymore, I want a new family, one without rules" from my 6yo.  That was yesterday at the grocery, when I said no to a bag of candy  --- yeah, it Made me all warm and fuzzy.



 this is EXACTLY what sticks in my mind when i think of the *JOY*   of having kids  

no thanks!


----------



## druidia

Alaska Catdog, thank you for my first laugh out loud of the day.    



> PS when people say "you'd make such great parents" I say "I know, but I'd really hate it." that shuts them up.



**************************************************

I think whether someone "resents the child for being born" or "resents being a parent" the net effect upon the child is the same.  _Some_ people are just no good at hiding their emotions for the sake of anyone, including their own children.  I think ultimately that child is going to feel that resentment one way or another, and it will shape their lives and relationships.  I think parents give off more vibes that they think sometimes, and children are particularly intuitive about the emotions of another, whether or not they understand them.

I long for the day when people stop doing things because someone else thinks they should, and start making decisions based upon what THEY will have to live with going forward.  It doesn't matter what the grandparents want, what the friends are doing, our even what your religion dictates.  If those people/entities are not there at the end of the day to raise your child and provide all manner of support, they should stay out of it.  The parents-to-be are the ones that must live with the decision.


----------



## Best_Vacation_EVER!

My DH and I had been married for more than 10 years -- and we were pretty sure that we didn't want kids.  We were very happy -- we did what we wanted, travelling was easy (taking our dogs to a kennel is far easier than taking a baby to a babysitter), our house looked great, etc... .   We pretty much had things exactly as we wanted it.  It drove me nuts when people would start harping on how we "have to have kids" or "how our lives wouldn't be complete until we had babies".

We came to the decision on our own terms that we wanted to be parents and now have an 8 week old --- who is totally amazing and who we love sooo much.  Our happiness did not hinge on us having a baby (we would have been very happy if we hadn't had made the decision to have a baby.)  

Having a baby totally turns your life upside down -- the lack of sleep, total dedication to another being, the notion that for the next 25 years (hopefully he'll be done university and starting out on his own by then) he's pretty much dependant on us, trying to "baby-proof" our house, etc... .   We love it but it's pretty much all consuming.  

I totally understand and respect the decision anyone makes about whether to have kids or not.  It's not a decision to be taken lightly either way.  Life is short (kids or no kids) ---  ENJOY IT!


----------



## bumpkin

So glad to meet someone who feels just like I do!  Im 31 and have been married 5 years.  We both have great jobs, a nice big house and take 3 or 4 vacations a year.  Im really like my life the way it is.  I still take alot of flack from people who have kids.  Most dont understand why I would choose not to have kids.  Im sure most cant see life without their children, but I cant see my life with them. Its a very personal choice.  Really as long as my husband is ok with it I dont feel I have to answer to anyone else.  We just planned our Sept trip to Disney (our 3rd) as adults.  Im glad I dont have kids to drag along.  Probably sounds harsh but everyone is different right?  To each his own.  Im glad we live in a time where we have a choice.


----------



## Haley Whippet

Krissalee said:
			
		

> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!




We are married 32 years, with no kids. The questions well never stop. 
Just smile and say No we don't have kids, and yes we are free to travel and go to WDW anytime we want  
Deb


----------



## Markstudy

I answer in another way....

"I've noticed that folks have kids mainly because everyone else does it. 
I've never had that flock mentality, I lean more towards the sheep-herders than the sheep. When you think about it, it takes more planning not to have accidents (I mean kids)."    

So....that answer usually saves me from the next hour of chatting about how great their kids 4th birthday party was   

 



.


----------



## maddhatir

Best_Vacation_EVER! said:
			
		

> We were very happy -- we did what we wanted, travelling was easy (taking our dogs to a kennel is far easier than taking a baby to a babysitter),



YOU SEE! now THATS why, in NO WAY whatsoever, would i make a good parent-- i would be taking the KIDS to the kennel and the DOGS to the sitter!  

DH and I are very irresponsible that way!


----------



## Myrtle

Married 5 years before - unexpectedly - having a son.  We'd not planned on having a child and were doing what we wanted.  2 years later I lost a baby to a "one in a million" problem.  I never understood the whole thing either until I became a mom.  I wouldn't trade it for anything.  My mom always said, "the love you feel for your child is totally different from the love you'll ever experience with anyone else."  It's so true.

I agree with thelionking on everything.  Now that he's 15 - I gotta say I'm looking a bit forward to his college years and our being able to travel but I wouldn't trade the life I've shared with my son for anything in this world.

When we lost our baby - well-meaning people said some really stupid things - like, "you can always have another one."  That was pretty hurtful - though unintentional.

Sounds to me like you have a pretty good head on your shoulders.  Follow your heart as well. I applaude the fact you know yourself so well and are comfortable with who you are. If you choose not to have a child - it's your decision and you know best.  It's really not anyone else's business.  You don't owe anyone an explanation.


----------



## hollyb

bumpkin said:
			
		

> So glad to meet someone who feels just like I do!  Im 31 and have been married 5 years.  We both have great jobs, a nice big house and take 3 or 4 vacations a year.  Im really like my life the way it is.  I still take alot of flack from people who have kids.  Most dont understand why I would choose not to have kids.  Im sure most cant see life without their children, but I cant see my life with them. Its a very personal choice.  Really as long as my husband is ok with it I dont feel I have to answer to anyone else.  We just planned our Sept trip to Disney (our 3rd) as adults.  Im glad I dont have kids to drag along.  Probably sounds harsh but everyone is different right?  To each his own.  Im glad we live in a time where we have a choice.




Here's a shocker we have a nice home and take many vacations a year. PLUS we have 2 wonderful children. Having kids does not mean you can't have nice things or go on nice vacation. Shocking I know.


----------



## bigbabyblues

I am married and we have two children; I can't imagine my life without them.  BUT, I also think it's your right to choose if you want to have children or not.  I don't think there's anything wrong with married people not having or wanting children.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

Myrtle said:
			
		

> When we lost our baby - well-meaning people said some really stupid things - like, "you can always have another one."  That was pretty hurtful - though unintentional.



I'm sorry for your loss. I can't imagine anyone saying something like that! When my puppy passed away, someone mentioned something like that and it ticked me off when it was about my pet- I can't imagine someone saying that about a child.


----------



## kennancat

hollyb said:
			
		

> Here's a shocker we have a nice home and take many vacations a year. PLUS we have 2 wonderful children. Having kids does not mean you can't have nice things or go on nice vacation.


No, of course it doesn't mean that you can't have those things. But it does change things. I've always said that I'd like to go to Europe before having children, if we ever chose to have them. There's no law saying you can't bring kids to Europe. But I want to be able to really enjoy the trip and take it all in, not spending time worrying about whether my 3 year old can take one more cathedral before having a meltdown and where the heck I'm going to find chicken nuggets for the picky eater 6 year old. If you have kids, you have to put their needs above your wants.



			
				hollyb said:
			
		

> Shocking I know.


Okay, enough already. What is your goal here? Between the above and your last contribution:


			
				hollyb said:
			
		

> It is said you will never hear the words. "I love you mommy: sweetest words in the English language. I will pray that you change your mind. Your very young still.


it feels like you're just having fun stirring the pot. The people in this thread either don't want kids or are debating it, which has nothing to do with your life or the choices you've made. Is this kind of baiting really necessary?


----------



## hollyb

No not try to stir anything. Just am happy to be a mom with great kids. But don't come crying when your to old to have kids and then wonder why you can't get pregnant.

Enjoy Europe!


----------



## WillCAD

Myrtle said:
			
		

> When we lost our baby - well-meaning people said some really stupid things - like, "you can always have another one."  That was pretty hurtful - though unintentional.



Just tell idiots who say things like that, "Yeah, I guess I shouldn't be upset about losing a child, since they're all the same and can be replaced like a lamp or a car."

Maybe that'll make them realize how stupid the "you can always have another one" comment really is.



			
				hollyb said:
			
		

> No not try to stir anything. Just am happy to be a mom with great kids. But don't come crying when your to old to have kids and then wonder why you can't get pregnant.
> 
> Enjoy Europe!



It's also pretty stupid to assume that anybody who doesn't want kids NOW will obviously change their minds later and want kids. What makes you think anybody who truly doesn't want kids when they're 30 is going to change their mind at 40 or 50 or 60 and want kids?

Some of us know our own hearts well enough to not to delude ourselves. We don't want kids now, and we never will. And we know it. You think you know us better?


----------



## purplegirl247

My boyfriend and I have been together for four years, so we usually get the "why aren't you guys married yet??" question. I've been pretty straightforward with not wanting children, so most people in my life know better than to ask. HOWEVER, I went to the GYN a few months ago for my annual exam, was chatting with the doctor about birth control, and mentioned to her I never wanted to have children. Her eyes got all big, her brows furrowed, and she said, "Oh my gosh, really? I've never heard a woman say that before!" (uh, does she not talk to many women?) 

So I gave her the pat answers of, "It just isn't for me, I helped raise my brothers, I'm just not maternal, etc. etc." Didn't work. I got a ten-minute lecture FROM MY GYN about the joys of having children. At this point, I was really, really fearful about the birth control chat we'd just had; I was afraid she was going to give me something with a low dosage or something to force me into feeling the joy. In conclusion, yes, it's inappropriate for the general public to ask about your child plans, but it should be illegal to get it from the person who is supposed to be your impartial doctor!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

Wow! We must look motherly, lol.

I've been w my bf for four years, too and I had a similar (but not as direct) situation w my gyn. He said we were so cute and what gorgeous children we'd have and asked when we're going to have kids. I was so taken aback! I said "not for a long time" We're not even married yet! I mean, I've known him for a long time (like 13 yrs) since he delivered my nephews, but still, I was surprised. I don't know what I would have done with a lecture like that!




			
				purplegirl247 said:
			
		

> My boyfriend and I have been together for four years, so we usually get the "why aren't you guys married yet??" question. I've been pretty straightforward with not wanting children, so most people in my life know better than to ask. HOWEVER, I went to the GYN a few months ago for my annual exam, was chatting with the doctor about birth control, and mentioned to her I never wanted to have children. Her eyes got all big, her brows furrowed, and she said, "Oh my gosh, really? I've never heard a woman say that before!" (uh, does she not talk to many women?)
> 
> So I gave her the pat answers of, "It just isn't for me, I helped raise my brothers, I'm just not maternal, etc. etc." Didn't work. I got a ten-minute lecture FROM MY GYN about the joys of having children. At this point, I was really, really fearful about the birth control chat we'd just had; I was afraid she was going to give me something with a low dosage or something to force me into feeling the joy. In conclusion, yes, it's inappropriate for the general public to ask about your child plans, but it should be illegal to get it from the person who is supposed to be your impartial doctor!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

hollyb said:
			
		

> No not try to stir anything. Just am happy to be a mom with great kids. But don't come crying when your to old to have kids and then wonder why you can't get pregnant.
> 
> Enjoy Europe!





hollyb, I truly hope you are a mom that is content with your life and great kids, but it does seem odd for you to continually think everyone will want that kind of a life AND to continually post that on the "adults and solo travelers" board under a thread about "marrieds choosing not to have kids". To me it is like someone going to the "Gay and Lesbian" thread to post that homosexuality is wrong. Or what if someone came to the family boards and posted about their solo trip and how happy they were to go alone and put down those who have children. Would that be right? What makes people happy can vary so much from person to person. A lifestyle that makes one person happy, might make another miserable. 

To insinuate people will "come crying when you're too old to have kids" is silly. I've never known anyone to regret that choice and if they did, they could always become a foster parent or try to adopt, no matter what their age. There are many children in this world who were uplanned, unwanted and are in desperate need of a good, stable home. 

When people don't respect the validity of the responsible choices of others, and post on a thread where those people are trying to bond with like minds, it usually means they are trying to convince themselves of the issue more than others.


----------



## kennancat

purplegirl247 said:
			
		

> I got a ten-minute lecture FROM MY GYN about the joys of having children. At this point, I was really, really fearful about the birth control chat we'd just had; I was afraid she was going to give me something with a low dosage or something to force me into feeling the joy. In conclusion, yes, it's inappropriate for the general public to ask about your child plans, but it should be illegal to get it from the person who is supposed to be your impartial doctor!



Seriously, I'd get a new gyno if I were you - and tell the old one why she made you so uncomfortable. Actually, I notice you're in Orlando too. Feel free to PM me if you need a recommendation; I like mine. She's asked if we plan to have kids, but I feel like that's more about helping me manage my health than trying to convince me to have them. Then again, mine's gyno only (no OB) so it's no loss of profit to her if I don't have kids


----------



## rigs32

I had a gyn once who gave me a hard time, too.  Her attitude changed when she found out that this 20something already had her tubes tied and no intention to have kids.  She actually told me that my only choices to deal with my debilitating cramps were the pill or to suffer.  The pill affects my mental health, so she was saying I had to choose one or the other.  Great doc, eh?  

I did my research and found a great doc who practiced part time and taught at a top 20 med school part time.  A pity she got hired as a full professor, but I guess she'll do some good with training new docs.  She said that I didn't have to suffer and I now have an IUD that gets hormones into my uterus but not my blood stream.  So, between that and the tubal, someone's in big trouble if I turn up pregnant.


----------



## Hixski

I have a little different take on not having children.

DH and I have been married for 21 years. We do not have children. We did not choose to not have children. It is just the way it worked out. It was bad enough having everyone ask when we were going to have children. Most have given up on that now that I am 46. (Gee did I really give my real age)  

My issue with stupid questions now deal with:
Why didn't you try everything humanly and medically possible to have a child?
Why didn't you adopt?
Is that why you have a dog since you didn't have children?

The really stupid questions come from people that do have children. Most seem to be jealous that we like to have a good time and travel. Like we should not be able to have a good time. We should stay home and pity ourselves. My goodness. One couple told us we have disposable income without children. Yes we do. I am sorry that bothers some. 

Hearing the words "Mommy I love you" would have been great but I too am getting tired of some attitudes towards not having children. Planned or otherwise.


----------



## nono

Hixski said:
			
		

> My issue with stupid questions now deal with:
> Why didn't you try everything humanly and medically possible to have a child?
> Why didn't you adopt?
> Is that why you have a dog since you didn't have children?



I abhor the fact that people are so rude.  As if you have any obligation to answer these questions!

The first two questions have moral (and other) issues attached to them.  And for people to simply act like either are "always the right thing to do" is at minimum uninformed and at maximum insane.  So, when folks ask that, you need to remember they've just telegraphed a lot about themselves.   

The last question is just dopey.  I've had dogs and I now have a child.  Dogs are a LOT less hassle.


----------



## Hixski

Thank you nono.
I just wish  more people thought like you. My DH usually says to people that ask us why we don't have kids. " How do you know we haven't been trying for 20 years and this makes us feel really bad" I try to have a little tact but he has no qualms saying these things at all. He has even told people to MYOB. You would have thought we shot them. I guess it just amazes me that the questions are even more rude if you wanted children and did not do everything possible to get them. 

I guess I will have to just enjoy life. Our nieces (7 and 9) will be staying at our house this week. At least they don't care if we have children. They adore us just the way we are.


----------



## tink98

ok...I probably don't belong in here b/c I have kids...but wanted to add my thoughts (I have not read this entire thread - WOW is it long!)

My husband and I recently become friends with 2 other couples (having met as a result of a similiar interest).  During an early conversation the topic of children came up and we shared that we had 2, one couple replied that they did not have any, and the other replied that they didn't have children but had 3 dogs and pulled up pictures on their camera phone (loved that since our 2 dogs may as well be 2 more children  )   Was I curious why they did not have children?  A bit, but I would never consider asking why not.  I don;t feel it is my business and if they wanted to tell me why they do not have children, that is up to them(could be infertility, not ready, or simply not for them) .  I would hope no one would ever consider asking me "Why would you have children?"

Now the wives of these couples often have lots more time to travel together at the spur of the moment, and do often invite me to come along.  THIS IS THE PART THAT BOTHERS ME.  I could very easily take off for the weekend and leave my husband and children home, but that's where I choose to be home with them.  I sense that they feel bad that I can't come along because I have kids. Not the case, it's about choice.   

I think everyone (not limited to this topic) should be a bit more sensitive to others choices and not try to convince each other that "my way must be the best way".

Now on a Disney note,  DH and I have vacationed to WDW with and without our DS and DD and had a blast on all trips!


----------



## kennancat

tink98 said:
			
		

> Now the wives of these couples often have lots more time to travel together at the spur of the moment, and do often invite me to come along.  THIS IS THE PART THAT BOTHERS ME.  I could very easily take off for the weekend and leave my husband and children home, but that's where I choose to be home with them.  I sense that they feel bad that I can't come along because I have kids.



I don't think there's anything wrong with choosing to be with your family - that's your priority and your choice. I guess my take on this would be that it's better that they ask you than just automatically leave you out. If the last-minute part is what makes it difficult for you, I would propose you take the lead and plan a trip with them ahead of time. Maybe your DH could do something with the kids that you don't enjoy (fishing, camping, etc.) or take them to visit his parents and have some quality time with the grandparents. Or maybe you could just go out with them for an evening or a day trip if you don't want to be away from your family for the whole weekend. Try to give them the benefit of the doubt if they seem offended by your refusals - they may not realize that you're turning them down to be with family and just think you don't want to go along.

I would also add that I've found some of the people who are parents to have very insightful comments in this thread, so don't feel like you don't belong here. I don't have kids, so I can only imagine what my life would be like if I did. I appreciate people who do have kids being honest about the challenges they face instead of keeping up the "Hallmark greeting card" rosy picture of parenthood. I'd rather we get to a place where we can all respect one another's choices instead of cultivating a parents vs. non-parents mentality.


----------



## maddhatir

LuluLovesDisney said:
			
		

> hollyb, I truly hope you are a mom that is content with your life and great kids, but it does seem odd for you to continually think everyone will want that kind of a life AND to continually post that on the "adults and solo travelers" board under a thread about "marrieds choosing not to have kids". To me it is like someone going to the "Gay and Lesbian" thread to post that homosexuality is wrong. Or what if someone came to the family boards and posted about their solo trip and how happy they were to go alone and put down those who have children. Would that be right? What makes people happy can vary so much from person to person. A lifestyle that makes one person happy, might make another miserable.
> 
> To insinuate people will "come crying when you're too old to have kids" is silly. I've never known anyone to regret that choice and if they did, they could always become a foster parent or try to adopt, no matter what their age. There are many children in this world who were uplanned, unwanted and are in desperate need of a good, stable home.
> 
> When people don't respect the validity of the responsible choices of others, and post on a thread where those people are trying to bond with like minds, it usually means they are trying to convince themselves of the issue more than others.



very well said LuluLovesDisney!   

i am SURE we will ALL be looking for hollyb when we are older and are _*STILL *_* HAPPY WITHOUT having had kids!* 

its funny because i AM "older" now...41 and DH and i have been together since we were 16-- and from the day we met- the ONLY conversation we had about kids is, we both dont want them. i consder myself SO! lucky that i found someone who felt the same way i did (and at such a young age) and was not HOUNDING me to have kids. we never had "the conversation" should we HAVE kids. not only did we feel it would be too much resposibility (for US!) BUT- at a young age and throughout our relationship, we also discuss how we would not want to bring a child into this world with so many of its problems (one example----yes, when we were in our 20s we ACTUALLY WERE AWARE OF GLOBAL WARMING AND THE EFFECTS IT WILL HAVE ON THE EARTH!---sorry government- the horse is already out of the barn-- it is too late to shut the barn door NOW!---- sorry OT!) 

it must be hard for couples who are on opposite sides of the fence but still love each other and have that hanging over their heads all the time.


----------



## Dee & Greg

Married 17 years and child-free by choice.  HollyB:  why would you lurk on a Adult and Solo Travellers board and then waste precious time offending all of us child-free couples about how wrong we are?  I don't spend my time on the families board, and I'm sure I'd get flamed if I did.

Let us have our opinions and choices.... thank God this is a free country.


----------



## maddhatir

Dee & Greg said:
			
		

> Let us have our opinions and choices.... thank God this is a free country.



yeah- lets see how long that lasts........  seems people are trying to change that also everyday.


----------



## SnowWhite

When my wife and I were in highschool (we started dating just before grade 12) we always said that we were going to be career people and that we never wanted kids. I used to joke that I would rent them to mow the lawn and for father-son golf tournaments. A few of our friends started having kids in their very early 20's just after getting married and slowly it changed our views. I distinctly remember the moment I knew I wanted kids when a friends daughter puked all over me and my ralph lauren polo shirt (my favourite shirts) and I didn't even slightly get angry or excited about it. Kids went from the snotty nosed little winey embarrasements to adorable little rugrats. It was funny that both of us felt this way too. I guess we are lucky. I can't imagine my life without my kids now. Kids are not for everyone, and I certainly respect those who don't want them. I disagree with some of the people that have posted though, it is not selfish to not want kids. You make the choice that best suits your lifestyle. We are celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary this trip in sept and 17 wonderful years together since that summer before grade 12. We have two great kids DD9 and DS3. Best wishes to everyone!

Rob (Snowwhite's DH)


----------



## maddhatir

SnowWhite said:
			
		

> I disagree with some of the people that have posted though, it is not selfish to not want kids. You make the choice that best suits your lifestyle.
> Rob (Snowwhite's DH)



but rob-- what if that is really why i didnt have kids...because i _*AM * _ selfish!   ...seriously......


----------



## SnowWhite

LOL Maddhatir..............


----------



## Shelly F - Ohio

We have been married for 7 years and I had a hysterectomy but prior to the surgery we had already decided that we did not want kids. I used multi barriers to insure that we did not have an accident. 
We have a wonder relationship. We can do what we want when we want. We also have a total of 19 neices and nephews so anytime we want we have a kid we can spoil and then give them back to their parents. 
My DH has a uncle and aunt close to our age and they too have no kids. Both them and us enjoy going to Disney. 
If people are pushy just tell them that you have decided not to have kids and you enjoy the life you lead.


----------



## hmp2z

My DH & I choose to live a child-free life  

I thought it was funny that, on our last trip to Orlando, we were driving down & stopped at a Denny's along the way.  While we were waiting to pay our bill, a man in line in front of us looked at us and asked whether we were headed to Orlando, and we told him yes.  He said that he was, too, with his family, and then asked, "Do you have kids yet?"  Upon our reply in the negative, he said, "Then don't ever have them."  

He then told us his story, of how he'd been trying to make it to Orlando in 1 day, and instead, his child got grumpy at 5 am, so they had to stop at this hotel, spend $150 for the night, to get 3 hours of sleep (he apparently woke them up at 8 am to try to get on the road).  At this point, he was waiting for them to come down from the room, so they could hit the road again.

It just struck me as funny, since the "Don't ever have them" isn't usually the attitude I hear from parents   I guess he could feel free to express himself since wife & child were away.

Cheers!
Heather W


----------



## hollyb

hmp2z said:
			
		

> My DH & I choose to live a child-free life
> 
> I thought it was funny that, on our last trip to Orlando, we were driving down & stopped at a Denny's along the way.  While we were waiting to pay our bill, a man in line in front of us looked at us and asked whether we were headed to Orlando, and we told him yes.  He said that he was, too, with his family, and then asked, "Do you have kids yet?"  Upon our reply in the negative, he said, "Then don't ever have them."
> 
> He then told us his story, of how he'd been trying to make it to Orlando in 1 day, and instead, his child got grumpy at 5 am, so they had to stop at this hotel, spend $150 for the night, to get 3 hours of sleep (he apparently woke them up at 8 am to try to get on the road).  At this point, he was waiting for them to come down from the room, so they could hit the road again.
> 
> It just struck me as funny, since the "Don't ever have them" isn't usually the attitude I hear from parents   I guess he could feel free to express himself since wife & child were away.
> 
> Cheers!
> Heather W



That guy was a JERK!!! It was his fault 100% for pushing his young son that hard, just so jerk could make it in one day!!!! Don't blame the poor child!!


----------



## Hixski

hollyb said:
			
		

> That guy was a JERK!!! It was his fault 100% for pushing his young son that hard, just so jerk could make it in one day!!!! Don't blame the poor child!!



I guess he was one of those people who should have chosen not to have children. And you think everyone is going to come crying to you when they are older and don't have any......


----------



## maddhatir

hollyb said:
			
		

> That guy was a JERK!!! It was his fault 100% for pushing his young son that hard, just so jerk could make it in one day!!!! Don't blame the poor child!!



OMG! how do even know the tone of his voice while he was telling hmp2z the story- was he angry about the whole thing- maybe he was half kidding but just a bit frustrated-   

how do you know he was a jerk? if he was a HUGE jerk he would have kept going and yelled at the kid to be quiet- or even worse- made his family stay in one of the 20.00 per night MOTELS along the road!   

i am SURE there are PLENTY of parents whether they are coming, going or IN disney that want to tell childless people they made the right choice!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:
			
		

> OMG! how do even know the tone of his voice while he was telling hmp2z the story- was he angry about the whole thing- maybe he was half kidding but just a bit frustrated-
> 
> how do you know he was a jerk? if he was a HUGE jerk he would have kept going and yelled at the kid to be quiet- or even worse- made his family stay in one of the 20.00 per night MOTELS along the road!
> 
> i am SURE there are PLENTY of parents whether they are coming, going or IN disney that want to tell childless people they made the right choice!



That is what I thought I just had a little less tact in saying it. 

After all the rude comments we get about not having children I do think it is funny that    People with children will also tell us that even though they would not give up their children for anything, if they had it to do over they do not know if they would have them. I guess they can admit it to childless people. I am sure they would get ripped a new one if they said that to someone who thinks everyone should have children.....

Again we are all free......


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:
			
		

> Again we are all free......



isnt that THE BEST feeling!


----------



## Lizzy2

I have a beautiful 4 daughter and she is the joy of my life and most of my career choices have involved childcare in some shape or form and I am here to tell you that the worst thing you can do is have a child that you don't really want. They need 200% of your love, energy, and attention and whats more they deserve it . 
If you don't want kids just don't do it-
There is nothing worse than seeing a child who is just an "accessory" in their parents lives.
If your relatives won't respect your decision or say they "need" you to give them grandchildren just say "Ok, tell you what? I'll have the kid and give it to you because I'm not going to want it anymore then than I do now." and see if that shuts them up.


----------



## maddhatir

Lizzy2 said:
			
		

> I have a beautiful 4 daughter and she is the joy of my life and most of my career choices have involved childcare in some shape or form and I am here to tell you that the worst thing you can do is have a child that you don't really want. They need 200% of your love, energy, and attention and whats more they deserve it .
> If you don't want kids just don't do it-
> There is nothing worse than seeing a child who is just an "accessory" in their parents lives.
> If your relatives won't respect your decision or say they "need" you to give them grandchildren just say "Ok, tell you what? I'll have the kid and give it to you because I'm not going to want it anymore then than I do now." and see if that shuts them up.



thanks!


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:
			
		

> i am SURE there are PLENTY of parents whether they are coming, going or IN disney that want to tell childless people they made the right choice!



I don't remember if I mentioned this in this thread or in the other one on the community board, but it always cracks me up when I'm driving east on the 528 towards the airport and pass the "Vasectomy.com" billboard. For those of you not familiar with it, it goes like this (yes, this is really how the fonts work):

Vasectomy.com
It's easier then you think
to find a doctor and get information

You *KNOW* they've positioned it right there to catch all the frazzled parents returning to the airport after their Disney or Universal vacation!  Oh, and I especially love how they shrink the font on that last line.


----------



## aclov

I just wanted to comment on how people are rude, nosey, inconsiderate or whatever you want to call it - when they ask "WHY DON'T YOU HAVE CHILDREN?" questions.  Maybe they are just naive.   I guess it bothers me more because DH have been married for 6 years and trying to get pregnant for 5 years.   I also get the feeling like people including my family and friends feel sorry for me, like having a child makes me less of a woman.   My parents seem to bring up these stories of people they know that never had children. One of my coworkers once said to me about her friend that doesn't have children "Poor thing, she never had any children" I just couldn't believe that comment!  And to say something to me of all people.  Ugh!   Just today, I spoke to a ex-coworker I hadn't talk to in a couple of years and he asked if I had any children.   When I told him No, he asked "And how long have you been married?"   DH gets fed up too, he said the next person that asks him he was going to reply "Because I hate kids!"   This of course is not true but it gets frustrating and I cringe just to hear these questions.    It's very insensitive because you don't know if it's by choice or because of infertility or medical problems.   I worked with alot of DINKS in the past and never did I ask these type of questions, even before I was going through my own situation.       Okay -  I'm done.


----------



## maddhatir

aclov said:
			
		

> I just wanted to comment on how people are rude, nosey, inconsiderate or whatever you want to call it - when they ask "WHY DON'T YOU HAVE CHILDREN?" questions.  Maybe they are just naive.   I guess it bothers me more because DH have been married for 6 years and trying to get pregnant for 5 years.   I also get the feeling like people including my family and friends feel sorry for me, like having a child makes me less of a woman.   My parents seem to bring up these stories of people they know that never had children. One of my coworkers once said to me about her friend that doesn't have children "Poor thing, she never had any children" I just couldn't believe that comment!  And to say something to me of all people.  Ugh!   Just today, I spoke to a ex-coworker I hadn't talk to in a couple of years and he asked if I had any children.   When I told him No, he asked "And how long have you been married?"   DH gets fed up too, he said the next person that asks him he was going to reply "Because I hate kids!"   This of course is not true but it gets frustrating and I cringe just to hear these questions.    It's very insensitive because you don't know if it's by choice or because of infertility or medical problems.   I worked with alot of DINKS in the past and never did I ask these type of questions, even before I was going through my own situation.       Okay -  I'm done.




I LOVE BEING A DINK!   

actually the people i know - KNOW DH and i dont like kids- so they have given up asking!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hixski said:
			
		

> I have a little different take on not having children.
> 
> DH and I have been married for 21 years. We do not have children. We did not choose to not have children. It is just the way it worked out. It was bad enough having everyone ask when we were going to have children. Most have given up on that now that I am 46. (Gee did I really give my real age)
> 
> My issue with stupid questions now deal with:
> Why didn't you try everything humanly and medically possible to have a child?
> Why didn't you adopt?
> Is that why you have a dog since you didn't have children?
> 
> The really stupid questions come from people that do have children. Most seem to be jealous that we like to have a good time and travel. Like we should not be able to have a good time. We should stay home and pity ourselves. My goodness. One couple told us we have disposable income without children. Yes we do. I am sorry that bothers some.
> 
> Hearing the words "Mommy I love you" would have been great but I too am getting tired of some attitudes towards not having children. Planned or otherwise.


This is exactly our story.  It's not like I set out to not have kids but it just isn't happening.

And, many people do not know the agony and devestation of many years of trying.  I have poked, prodded, cut open and hooked up to machines like a guinea pig far too many times than I care to remember or share with the whole world.  It's not like I broadcast it to the world.  Perhaps I _look_ selfish because we don't have children but perhaps *you* don't have all the facts.  For those many years of trying I had NO life.  I lived from period to period, from treatment to treatment.  We even tried to adopt but that went horribly wrong and I'm NOT ready to go back there!!  Basically, I had stopped living and I had no control over my life!  I had lost my control and power.  And hearing things like





			
				hollyb said:
			
		

> It is said you will never hear the words. "I love you mommy: sweetest words in the English language.


did not make the situation any easier.  What, do I need you reminding me?

Then one day, something snapped (in a good way) and somehow I decided that my life is just fine without kids! That my DH and I were a *complete* family just as we were! I don't know, maybe I had hit the rock bottom of infertility and the only thing left to do was go up and climb out? Go in a different direction.   Finally, I made the decision to be childfree and to finally get off the dizzying merry-go-round of infertility!   Finally, something I could control.  And slowly, I started getting my life back.  You see when many medical professionals tell you that you won't have children you feel at a loss, out of control (at least I did) but when I made the decision that I would be childfree well, it was my decision. 

I am really irritated   and insulted by people like hollyb.  People like her make my blood boil because they don't know the whole story but they are so free with their opinions and feel the whole world wants to hear it!!  It should be suffice to say we choose not to have children and that's it and not have people like hollyb pass judgement.  I shouldn't have to relay my whole infertility story to people like her so that maybe they will think differently of me.  They should be the bigger person and just keep their opinions to themselves.  For people like me, who although I started out wanting children, and for people who always knew they didn't want children it is OUR choice!!!!  So back off!!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

You're absolutely right.

Choices like married, single, kids, no kids, religion, politics, career choices, etc. are life changing. Doesn't everyone think that most people will try to do what they think is best for them? No one needs to be told what to think and what to choose.

 I hope this is a reminder to those who make comments about having kids (or other personal topics) that it is very possible the person on the receving end:

a) is trying to have kids
b) was trying to have kids
c) doesn't want to have kids
d) may not be able to have kids
or e) may have lost a child

and doesn't need to be reminded of sadnesses or problems, or have their life choices questioned. Everyone deserves respect. 




			
				ForTheLoveofDisney said:
			
		

> This is exactly our story.  It's not like I set out to not have kids but it just isn't happening.
> 
> And, many people do not know the agony and devestation of many years of trying.  I have poked, prodded, cut open and hooked up to machines like a guinea pig far too many times than I care to remember or share with the whole world.  It's not like I broadcast it to the world.  Perhaps I _look_ selfish because we don't have children but perhaps *you* don't have all the facts.  For those many years of trying I had NO life.  I lived from period to period, from treatment to treatment.  We even tried to adopt but that went horribly wrong and I'm NOT ready to go back there!!  Basically, I had stopped living and I had no control over my life!  I had lost my control and power.  And hearing things likedid not make the situation any easier.  What, do I need you reminding me?
> 
> Then one day, something snapped (in a good way) and somehow I decided that my life is just fine without kids! That my DH and I were a *complete* family just as we were! I don't know, maybe I had hit the rock bottom of infertility and the only thing left to do was go up and climb out? Go in a different direction.   Finally, I made the decision to be childfree and to finally get off the dizzying merry-go-round of infertility!   Finally, something I could control.  And slowly, I started getting my life back.  You see when many medical professionals tell you that you won't have children you feel at a loss, out of control (at least I did) but when I made the decision that I would be childfree well, it was my decision.
> 
> I am really irritated   and insulted by people like hollyb.  People like her make my blood boil because they don't know the whole story but they are so free with their opinions and feel the whole world wants to hear it!!  It should be suffice to say we choose not to have children and that's it and not have people like hollyb pass judgement.  I shouldn't have to relay my whole infertility story to people like her so that maybe they will think differently of me.  They should be the bigger person and just keep their opinions to themselves.  For people like me, who although I started out wanting children, and for people who always knew they didn't want children it is OUR choice!!!!  So back off!!


----------



## Hixski

Hmmm, No comments from "You should have children at all costs" group.....  

I think the above 2 posts say it all. Hope to see some of you child free Disers when we are there in September.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:
			
		

> Hmmm, No comments from "You should have children at all costs" group.....
> 
> I think the above 2 posts say it all. Hope to see some of you child free Disers when we are there in September.



i think we just MIGHT miss each other in sept. (our dates 9/16-24th) i will have my green mickey head attached to something on my body!


----------



## wrldpossibility

I just stumbled upon this thread, and find it a very interesting topic. I have a few comments, and a few questions. First, DH and I have 3 kids, so we obviously fall onto the parent side of this lifestyle debate. Secondly, I don't think having kids is for everyone, and for those who are confident of their decision to not have any, I think that's great...I'd never try to "sell" the idea of having children to anyone who is set in their decision.

The only thing I've noticed in this thread from the "no children" camp that I disagree with is the continued use of the argument that they don't want kids because of the bad behavior, lack of visiting when they're older, etc. A few comments about having to hear "I hate you" etc bothered me, because it doesn't have to be that way. Yes, we've all heard kids acting like that, but I wouldn't use that as a reason not to have kids. You have control over how you raise them, and while all kids misbehave, certainly not to the point that it's a reason not to have kids. Same with adult children never visiting. Not always or even usually the case, I'd say. So I just wouldn't let that factor in.

And I will apologize (I learn on these boards),   because I have on occasion THOUGHT (not said, at least) the comment that a friend could not be as tired as me because she doens't have kids (that she may think she's really tired, but does't KNOW tired, lol). I was wrong to think that. Of course I don't know exactly how my friend feels. Sometimes when you have kids, and you remember how things like sleep and travel were easier before you had them, it can be easy to compare and claim the childless person doesn't understand. FOR ME, having kids is worth every bit of tiredness/difficulty, but it is more difficult than being childless, nevertheless.

My question is: for those who are childless NOT by choice (or at least were at some point), how can I, with my three young kids, help a relative who is childless and wishes for children? We see her often (at her request...she says she enjoys the kids), and I know she has some really tough days when she wants children very badly. She is resigned to the fact that she never will, and I worry my children cause her pain. Is there anything I can do to be more sensitive to it?

Also, I have several friends who don't have children yet (are married) and I don't know if they ever will. Is it inappropriate to ask them about their plans? I never thought it was, but after reading this thread, maybe?   Obviously if they told me no, I never want children, I'd never ask about it again. But they are vague. Is it rude to inquire, or rude not to, lol? Thanks! 

See everyone, childless and with children, at Disney!


----------



## PlutoLuvr

wrldpossibility said:
			
		

> Also, I have several friends who don't have children yet (are married) and I don't know if they ever will. Is it inappropriate to ask them about their plans? I never thought it was, but after reading this thread, maybe?   Obviously if they told me no, I never want children, I'd never ask about it again. But they are vague. Is it rude to inquire, or rude not to, lol? Thanks!
> 
> See everyone, childless and with children, at Disney!



I'd say based on the number of responses in this thread alone, yeah, it's probably inappropriate.  If they are being vague, they are probably doing so for a reason -- whatever that reason is -- and don't want to talk about it.

And thank you for not saying your childless friends don't know what it means to be tired.  I wish my friends w/kids would stop saying such rude comments to me.  I know what it's like to stay up all night.  I raised my brother because our single mom worked 12-hour days to give us a good life.  He's 15 years younger than me.  My mother had him at home with myself and a midwife present.  I also run my own business, and I average one all-nighter per month getting court transcripts out-- then go back to work the next day for eight to ten hours.

I, too, am tired of always having to be on the defensive about a very private decision that concerns no one but myself and my husband.


----------



## NeverlandClub23

wrldpossibility said:
			
		

> I just stumbled upon this thread, and find it a very interesting topic. I have a few comments, and a few questions. First, DH and I have 3 kids, so we obviously fall onto the parent side of this lifestyle debate. Secondly, I don't think having kids is for everyone, and for those who are confident of their decision to not have any, I think that's great...I'd never try to "sell" the idea of having children to anyone who is set in their decision.
> 
> The only thing I've noticed in this thread from the "no children" camp that I disagree with is the continued use of the argument that they don't want kids because of the bad behavior, lack of visiting when they're older, etc. A few comments about having to hear "I hate you" etc bothered me, because it doesn't have to be that way. Yes, we've all heard kids acting like that, but I wouldn't use that as a reason not to have kids. You have control over how you raise them, and while all kids misbehave, certainly not to the point that it's a reason not to have kids. Same with adult children never visiting. Not always or even usually the case, I'd say. So I just wouldn't let that factor in.
> 
> And I will apologize (I learn on these boards),   because I have on occasion THOUGHT (not said, at least) the comment that a friend could not be as tired as me because she doens't have kids (that she may think she's really tired, but does't KNOW tired, lol). I was wrong to think that. Of course I don't know exactly how my friend feels. Sometimes when you have kids, and you remember how things like sleep and travel were easier before you had them, it can be easy to compare and claim the childless person doesn't understand. FOR ME, having kids is worth every bit of tiredness/difficulty, but it is more difficult than being childless, nevertheless.
> 
> My question is: for those who are childless NOT by choice (or at least were at some point), how can I, with my three young kids, help a relative who is childless and wishes for children? We see her often (at her request...she says she enjoys the kids), and I know she has some really tough days when she wants children very badly. She is resigned to the fact that she never will, and I worry my children cause her pain. Is there anything I can do to be more sensitive to it?
> 
> Also, I have several friends who don't have children yet (are married) and I don't know if they ever will. Is it inappropriate to ask them about their plans? I never thought it was, but after reading this thread, maybe?   Obviously if they told me no, I never want children, I'd never ask about it again. But they are vague. Is it rude to inquire, or rude not to, lol? Thanks!
> 
> See everyone, childless and with children, at Disney!



What a nice post!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

wrldpossibility said:
			
		

> And I will apologize (I learn on these boards),   because I have on occasion THOUGHT (not said, at least) the comment that a friend could not be as tired as me because she doens't have kids (that she may think she's really tired, but does't KNOW tired, lol). I was wrong to think that. Of course I don't know exactly how my friend feels. Sometimes when you have kids, and you remember how things like sleep and travel were easier before you had them, it can be easy to compare and claim the childless person doesn't understand. FOR ME, having kids is worth every bit of tiredness/difficulty, but it is more difficult than being childless, nevertheless.


I'm going to take a stab at some of these but I can only speak for myself.

It's good that you have learned that just because someone doesn't have children that doesn't make them less tired.  I have stage 3 endometriosis (this is the main reason I can't conceive) and even though you can't see my illness I do suffer and am many days way more tired than my friends with children but I keep going and hopefully you would never know it.  Sure from the outside I can pretty up w/ doing my hair and makeup and wearing nice clothes but what you don't see is the war my body is raging on the inside against this hideous disease which at times really zaps my strength.  



> My question is: for those who are childless NOT by choice (or at least were at some point), how can I, with my three young kids, help a relative who is childless and wishes for children? We see her often (at her request...she says she enjoys the kids), and I know she has some really tough days when she wants children very badly. She is resigned to the fact that she never will, and I worry my children cause her pain. Is there anything I can do to be more sensitive to it?


I can only speak for me and from my experiences but just because I don't have kids (and choose not to) does not mean that I don't like kids.  I have 18 nieces and nephews and one on the way and I love them all.  I enjoy spending time with them because they are some really neat people.  I love their outlook on life and the way they see things and interpret things.  So believe your friend when she says she enjoys them.  Some things that have helped me is when my friends make "dates" with just us and not the kids.  When the focus is on the friendship and the kids aren't in tow.  Sometimes it's nice to talk about how you're rearanging your livingroom furniture, or a special date that you and hubby are planning, or the great bag you saw at Macy's.   Also, it helps when people just listen and don't (always) offer up advice.  Like if she's feeling really down, don't offer adoption as an option i.e. "Well, you could always adopt.".  I can pretty much bet my life on the fact that she's looked into it and knows that she "can always adopt" like people like to say.  Adoption is not for the faint of heart.  They delve into your past, your present, your home, your finances.  You have background checks and your fingerprinted and you have to go to doctor's for physicals and have letters of recomendation.  Talk about intrusion and it's not easy going through it once, twice and maybe have them fail.  Don't remind her "not to give up".  If she feels like giving up, she knows herself, let her.  Sometimes well meaning offers of advice feel like pressure and when your friend is trying to explain how she's feeling she doesn't need to feel like she has to defend an already hard decision.  I know many times I didn't even try with some friends, I just would say, "Yea, you're right.  I know." just to shut them up because it's hard enough without having to summons up the energy to fight for your position on it.  Sometimes we just have crummy days and we don't want to hear all of our options, we already know them!  Most days we just want to hear, "Yea, that sucks!!  It's not fair.  It does suck!"  Does this make sense?



> Also, I have several friends who don't have children yet (are married) and I don't know if they ever will. Is it inappropriate to ask them about their plans? I never thought it was, but after reading this thread, maybe?   Obviously if they told me no, I never want children, I'd never ask about it again. But they are vague. Is it rude to inquire, or rude not to, lol? Thanks!
> 
> See everyone, childless and with children, at Disney!


I'd say it's probably inappropriate.  Especially if they are vague.  They're probably being vague for a reason.  If it comes up great but if it doesn't come up, I wouldn't ask.

ETA:  Thanks for taking the time to find out.  The world needs more people like you.


----------



## mking624

I just stumbled on this thread myself.  My DH and I are in the camp that we are biologically unable to carry a child to term.  We didn't find this out until last fall after several years of trying to conceive.  We did get pregnant last summer, only to end in miscarriage a few weeks later.  It devastated me.  Now we are pursuing adoption.  

For awhile we contemplated being child-free.  We weren't sure that adoption was the right choice for us (obviously we know now).  But ultimately we realized that we desired to have children in our lives...we wanted to "leave a legacy" so to speak and it felt so selfish (for us) to just have life be about me and DH.  One thing that our infertility did teach us, however, is the importance of sensitivity regarding someone else's situation.  We don't know if a person without children has chosen not to have a child, has chosen to wait, or is unable to have children.  Every time I was asked why it was taking me so long to have children was a painful reminder of what my body was unable to do.  I spent many days crying.  I still cry sometimes...while I love the fact we're adopting, I know I'll never be able to experience what biological mothers get to experience and that's not easy to let go of.  

I'm a born again Christian so I believe that children are a blessing of God and that having children shouldn't be prevented.  But my infertility struggles have taught me that it's not my place to judge or critique someone else's situation because I don't know the full story.  I'm not here to place any judgment on those who choose not to have a child...my beliefs aren't causing me to be judgmental.  So please don't think that. :  But I bring it up because while I believe children are precious, I also believe the Bible when it said God created Adam and Eve...and they were complete.  It was such an awesome lesson for me to learn...that my DH and I were a complete family in God's eyes even without children in our lives.  That was so comforting to me.  I wish that I had the choice to say "I choose not to have [biological] children" instead of saying "I can't have children".  But I wish none of us had to go through the invasion of privacy that judge our status or situation when they don't even know every last detail.


----------



## apirateslifeforme

I'm getting a divorce after 7 1/2 years of marriage.  All through those years, we were constantly asked, "When are you going to have a baby?"  I would just shrug and say we weren't ready yet.  In my situation, I felt ashamed to tell the truth - that my husband was constantly getting into severe debt, which I would end up paying off, and he was abusive.  Now that we're getting a divorce, I want a baby so badly, it hurts


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

LuluLovesDisney said:
			
		

> You're absolutely right.
> 
> Choices like married, single, kids, no kids, religion, politics, career choices, etc. are life changing. *Doesn't everyone think that most people will try to do what they think is best for them? No one needs to be told what to think and what to choose.*
> I hope this is a reminder to those who make comments about having kids (or other personal topics) that it is very possible the person on the receving end:
> 
> a) is trying to have kids
> b) was trying to have kids
> c) doesn't want to have kids
> d) may not be able to have kids
> or e) may have lost a child
> 
> and doesn't need to be reminded of sadnesses or problems, or have their life choices questioned. Everyone deserves respect.


  Exactly.  I agree whole heartedly with your entire post!  Who are we to decide for someone else what is best for their lives?  

Oh, and I love your tag!  It's a great saying.  



			
				Hixski said:
			
		

> Hmmm, No comments from "You should have children at all costs" group.....
> 
> I think the above 2 posts say it all. Hope to see some of you child free Disers when we are there in September.


 I am dying to go in September.  DH and I have Annual Passes which are burning a hole in my pocket.  We have our DVC.  Alls I'd have to pay for is my airfare and food how can I afford NOT to go  ?  The trouble is trying to convince my DH  .   He's not so easily sold.    I've often thought of just planning the whole thing and making him go.  How wrong of me would that be?


----------



## wrldpossibility

apirateslifeforme said:
			
		

> I'm getting a divorce after 7 1/2 years of marriage.  All through those years, we were constantly asked, "When are you going to have a baby?"  I would just shrug and say we weren't ready yet.  In my situation, I felt ashamed to tell the truth - that my husband was constantly getting into severe debt, which I would end up paying off, and he was abusive.  Now that we're getting a divorce, I want a baby so badly, it hurts



Just want to say that I'm so sorry. I hope you are able to have a baby or adopt a baby when the time is right for you.


----------



## kennancat

wrldpossibility said:
			
		

> Also, I have several friends who don't have children yet (are married) and I don't know if they ever will. Is it inappropriate to ask them about their plans? I never thought it was, but after reading this thread, maybe?   Obviously if they told me no, I never want children, I'd never ask about it again. But they are vague. Is it rude to inquire, or rude not to, lol? Thanks!



If these are close friends then I personally don't see an issue with asking them directly. And by close friends, I mean people that you can have the serious, in-depth discussions about life, what you want out of it, etc. If these are people that you see every other month for dinner, then it's probably not a good idea to ask them directly, especially if their responses thus far have been vauge. I personally have no problem when our close or even our casual friends ask us if we're planning to have kids. I think the key if you want to ask them is to A) let the subject come up somewhat naturally and ask if, not when B) be prepared to back off and apologize if they seem uncomfortable or offended and C) don't let your mouth drop open, look horrified, and say, "wow, you really don't want kids at all" if that's what they end up saying  The other thing I would add is don't keep asking them every so often if they've changed their minds. We do have one set of friends that do that every so often and that does get a bit annoying.


----------



## Hixski

ForTheLoveofDisney said:
			
		

> I am dying to go in September.  DH and I have Annual Passes which are burning a hole in my pocket.  We have our DVC.  Alls I'd have to pay for is my airfare and food how can I afford NOT to go  ?  The trouble is trying to convince my DH  .   He's not so easily sold.    I've often thought of just planning the whole thing and making him go.  How wrong of me would that be?



I am lucky in that my DH would go anywhere I want to go. He is one of those people that does not care where he goes as long as he goes. If I say vacation, he does not say where, he says when.....  

Still waiting for comments from the "You should have children at all costs group".     NO.......great, maybe a breakthrough for those folks.


----------



## aclov

wrldpossibility said:
			
		

> I just stumbled upon this thread, and find it a very interesting topic. I have a few comments, and a few questions. First, DH and I have 3 kids, so we obviously fall onto the parent side of this lifestyle debate. Secondly, I don't think having kids is for everyone, and for those who are confident of their decision to not have any, I think that's great...I'd never try to "sell" the idea of having children to anyone who is set in their decision.
> 
> The only thing I've noticed in this thread from the "no children" camp that I disagree with is the continued use of the argument that they don't want kids because of the bad behavior, lack of visiting when they're older, etc. A few comments about having to hear "I hate you" etc bothered me, because it doesn't have to be that way. Yes, we've all heard kids acting like that, but I wouldn't use that as a reason not to have kids. You have control over how you raise them, and while all kids misbehave, certainly not to the point that it's a reason not to have kids. Same with adult children never visiting. Not always or even usually the case, I'd say. So I just wouldn't let that factor in.
> 
> And I will apologize (I learn on these boards),   because I have on occasion THOUGHT (not said, at least) the comment that a friend could not be as tired as me because she doens't have kids (that she may think she's really tired, but does't KNOW tired, lol). I was wrong to think that. Of course I don't know exactly how my friend feels. Sometimes when you have kids, and you remember how things like sleep and travel were easier before you had them, it can be easy to compare and claim the childless person doesn't understand. FOR ME, having kids is worth every bit of tiredness/difficulty, but it is more difficult than being childless, nevertheless.
> 
> My question is: for those who are childless NOT by choice (or at least were at some point), how can I, with my three young kids, help a relative who is childless and wishes for children? We see her often (at her request...she says she enjoys the kids), and I know she has some really tough days when she wants children very badly. She is resigned to the fact that she never will, and I worry my children cause her pain. Is there anything I can do to be more sensitive to it?
> 
> Also, I have several friends who don't have children yet (are married) and I don't know if they ever will. Is it inappropriate to ask them about their plans? I never thought it was, but after reading this thread, maybe?   Obviously if they told me no, I never want children, I'd never ask about it again. But they are vague. Is it rude to inquire, or rude not to, lol? Thanks!
> 
> See everyone, childless and with children, at Disney!



I have to agree to what another poster said that just because you don't have children doesn't mean you don't like them.   I love children and have been very close to my friends children at one time.   My DH has lots of nieces and nephews that we also spoil and have spent many weekends with us.   It's important to be sensitive to your friend and if you see she enjoys your children, maybe offer for all of you to go to the mall or on a date with you and your children.   I held my friends son's hand at the mall while she went shopping and was able to keep him company so she didn't have to worry about him.    I really enjoyed spending time with him.      I would say not to ask any personal questions unless your friend brings it up.   I have a friend that everytime I would talk to her she would question me about when I was going to have children, have I been trying, was I going to the doctor, was getting treatment, etc., etc.   This is someone I have known for almost 20 years and I would have gladly shared with her, but by her asking me constantly I just wanted to avoid her.   I have distanced myself from her because I just don't want to deal with her questions.    It's hard enough dealing with infertility and than having people interrogate you about it.   I also felt like she was trying to tell me her life was perfect because she had 3 kids and I didn't.   Maybe I was being oversensitive, but this is how sensitive this topic is when your dealing with failed artificial inseminations, month after month of trying, praying and hoping.      Your sound like a good friend and a good person for asking these types of questions, just be there for them is the best advice.  If they want to confide in you, they will.


----------



## kennancat

So here's something I thought about while watching the Kathy Griffin reality show the other day (the one where she does the corporate function and has to explain to the kid afterwards that she was joking when she said she hated kids). If you had to explain to your friends or relatives' kids why you chose to be childfree, how do you do it without hurting their feelings? I operate under the assumption that most rational, intelligent adults who spent at least 3 seconds contemplating the decision to have children would at least intellectually understand why another adult might not want children, but would a child? Luckily, my friends' kids are all pretty young still so it's not an issue, but I'd hate to upset some poor kid someday.


----------



## gatour

"Also, I have several friends who don't have children yet (are married) and I don't know if they ever will. Is it inappropriate to ask them about their plans? I never thought it was, but after reading this thread, maybe?  Obviously if they told me no, I never want children, I'd never ask about it again. But they are vague. Is it rude to inquire, or rude not to, lol? Thanks! "

Speaking as a couple who have decided not have children.  I don't have a problem with a friend/coworker asks me about children once or twice. I just don't won't to be badgered or judged to be a "bad" person because of our decision.  So your approach is acceptable

"contemplating the decision to have children would at least intellectually understand why another adult might not want children, but would a child? Luckily, my friends' kids are all pretty young still so it's not an issue, but I'd hate to upset some poor kid someday"

I haven't really thought about this, but my brother-in-law and sister-in-have young ones, I imagine if they ask I will simply say we decided not to have children.  I don't think that would damage them too much.


----------



## my4kids

Guys this thread is 10 months old!  Maybe the OP changed her mind and by now has a 1 month old and is mixing a bottle of formula as we speak.


----------



## maddhatir

my4kids said:
			
		

> Guys this thread is 10 months old!  Maybe the OP changed her mind and by now has a 1 month old and is mixing a bottle of formula as we speak.



OP!?   

its ALL ABOUT US NOW!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

my4kids said:
			
		

> Guys this thread is 10 months old!  Maybe the OP changed her mind and by now has a 1 month old and is mixing a bottle of formula as we speak.



That would be pretty ironic, especially considering that the OP had lived 32 years and 7 years of marriage in harmony with her decision to be childfree.


----------



## kennancat

my4kids said:
			
		

> Do you all realize that this thread has been around so long that the OP could have conceived and given birth since it was started? She could be starting a thread on the Families Board right now that is titled " I used to think I didn't want kids but now tell me if I should buy the Peg Perego or the Maclaren stroller"





			
				my4kids said:
			
		

> Guys this thread is 10 months old! Maybe the OP changed her mind and by now has a 1 month old and is mixing a bottle of formula as we speak.



Okay, it was funny the first time, but I'm not sure it's necessary to commemorate the thread's birthday every month


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:
			
		

> Okay, it was funny the first time, but I'm not sure it's necessary to commemorate the thread's birthday every month



maybe some of "them" are hoping maybe one of "us" went over to the dark side!


----------



## Krissalee

my4kids said:
			
		

> Guys this thread is 10 months old!  Maybe the OP changed her mind and by now has a 1 month old and is mixing a bottle of formula as we speak.




I am the OP.  Sorry, I haven't been active on this thread, but I spent the last 9 months pregnant, busy going to Lamaze classes, pre-natal yoga, and parenting classes, then had an awful sreaming labor, and the last month I have been up to my elbows in diapers and formula!  Yeesh, I've been busy!   

No, actually I am still blissfully child free.  I have been reading all the posts, and love a lot of the arguments everyone has made, and am glad that there is a network of those out there that are supportive.  I am not one for debates (and surprising there have been very few heated ones), so I have been happy to sit back and just read, absorb all the input.

Some of the pressure has been lifted off of me, as now my family is being innundated with babies.  My cousin's wife had their first in May, another cousin had her first in April, my sister is due with her first in August, and another cousin with her first in October.  Now there are enough babies in the family, and around me to keep everyone quiet.  To be honest, I think that is enough kids in a short enough period of time to keep everyone busy and minding their own business.  My sister was the inspiration for the first paragraph - she has been keeping herself so busy with baby preparations, that, in comparison, she will probably slow down when the little guy arrives.

But for me, no.  The only pitter patter of feet in my house is that of my pugs (and it is more like a clackity-clack, because I desperately need to trim their nails tonight).

Thanks for all the support, keep with the gret posts, and thanks to Hixski for the tip-off.


----------



## maddhatir

nice to meet ya!


----------



## my4kids

kennancat said:
			
		

> Okay, it was funny the first time, but I'm not sure it's necessary to commemorate the thread's birthday every month




I just can't believe it every time I see this thread hit the top of the board again....hasn't every childless by choice person reponded yet?  I think it is GREAT you are all childless.  It is nice to know that people know themselves that well and stick to what is right for them.  Don't get heated when someone questions you about it.  EVERYONE gets questioned about SOMETHING they don't like.  My neice who just graduated from highschool and doesn't want to go to college (can't find a job either - but that a whole nuther story) gets questioned about if she has changed her mind and deceided to enroll in courses.  She hates this so much she avoids family functions and doesn't hang around her high school friends anymore. As soon as someone gives birth to their first child - you start getting questioned if you're ready for a second.  When you get preg w/4th everyone asks "are you crazy" When you give birth to your 4th everyone says "You're done now right?"  I found all of these questions annoying, OK a couple were offensive to me after the 5000th time I heard them.  Anyway - everyone had something they are sick of answering to. Just answer with conviction.


----------



## mking624

my4kids said:
			
		

> I just can't believe it every time I see this thread hit the top of the board again....hasn't every childless by choice person reponded yet?  I think it is GREAT you are all childless.  It is nice to know that people know themselves that well and stick to what is right for them.  Don't get heated when someone questions you about it.  EVERYONE gets questioned about SOMETHING they don't like.  My neice who just graduated from highschool and doesn't want to go to college (can't find a job either - but that a whole nuther story) gets questioned about if she has changed her mind and deceided to enroll in courses.  She hates this so much she avoids family functions and doesn't hang around her high school friends anymore. As soon as someone gives birth to their first child - you start getting questioned if you're ready for a second.  When you get preg w/4th everyone asks "are you crazy" When you give birth to your 4th everyone says "You're done now right?"  I found all of these questions annoying, OK a couple were offensive to me after the 5000th time I heard them.  Anyway - everyone had something they are sick of answering to. Just answer with conviction.



Judging by your username, it's extremely clear that you will never even begin to understand what we deal with on a day to day basis.  This thread has turned out to be a great support network for those who either choose to be child free or those who cannot have children (like myself).  To tell us that we should no longer respond because the thread is "so old" or to minimize our feelings because we're being asked questions that you think we should just simply answer with conviction is just an insult to us.  Being asked if you're going to have MORE children or if you're going to stop having children is not quite the same as being asked and looked at as if you just became the scum of the earth for not doing what a woman is "supposed" to do.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

mking624 said:
			
		

> Judging by your username, it's extremely clear that you will never even begin to understand what we deal with on a day to day basis.  This thread has turned out to be a great support network for those who either choose to be child free or those who cannot have children (like myself).  To tell us that we should no longer respond because the thread is "so old" or to minimize our feelings because we're being asked questions that you think we should just simply answer with conviction is just an insult to us.  Being asked if you're going to have MORE children or if you're going to stop having children is not quite the same as being asked and looked at as if you just became the scum of the earth for not doing what a woman is "supposed" to do.



Beautifully said.


----------



## my4kids

mking624 said:
			
		

> Judging by your username, it's extremely clear that you will never even begin to understand what we deal with on a day to day basis.  This thread has turned out to be a great support network for those who either choose to be child free or those who cannot have children (like myself).  To tell us that we should no longer respond because the thread is "so old" or to minimize our feelings because we're being asked questions that you think we should just simply answer with conviction is just an insult to us.  Being asked if you're going to have MORE children or if you're going to stop having children is not quite the same as being asked and looked at as if you just became the scum of the earth for not doing what a woman is "supposed" to do.




Oh my - you so misread the tone of my post.
And what makes you think I got pregnant right away with my first?  How do know what I went through to have my babies? OR second or third or fourth. 
I was trying to offer support - and shed light that we ALL have SOME Cross to bare.  Mine may not be being childless...although from most of the responses here (no I have not read them all) it seems it is not a Cross to bare for many here either because they choose to be childless. I just think you read my post in a very negative light - and it was not at all meant that way.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

my4kids said:
			
		

> I just can't believe it every time I see this thread hit the top of the board again....hasn't every childless by choice person reponded yet?  I think it is GREAT you are all childless.  It is nice to know that people know themselves that well and stick to what is right for them.  Don't get heated when someone questions you about it.  EVERYONE gets questioned about SOMETHING they don't like.  My neice who just graduated from highschool and doesn't want to go to college (can't find a job either - but that a whole nuther story) gets questioned about if she has changed her mind and deceided to enroll in courses.  She hates this so much she avoids family functions and doesn't hang around her high school friends anymore. As soon as someone gives birth to their first child - you start getting questioned if you're ready for a second.  When you get preg w/4th everyone asks "are you crazy" When you give birth to your 4th everyone says "You're done now right?"  I found all of these questions annoying, OK a couple were offensive to me after the 5000th time I heard them.  Anyway - everyone had something they are sick of answering to. Just answer with conviction.



I agree that probably everyone has something they're sick of being questioned about. I think they would be able to endure it a little easier if they had support, though. So if you say you understand how it feels to have your choices questioned, why would you want a supportive thread like this to stop getting new posts?


----------



## mking624

my4kids said:
			
		

> Oh my - you so misread the tone of my post.
> And what makes you think I got pregnant right away with my first?  How do know what I went through to have my babies? OR second or third or fourth.
> I was trying to offer support - and shed light that we ALL have SOME Cross to bare.  Mine may not be being childless...although from most of the responses here (no I have not read them all) it seems it is not a Cross to bare for many here either because they choose to be childless. I just think you read my post in a very negative light - and it was not at all meant that way.


I didn't say that you got pregnant right away.  But clearly you DID have children...and 4 of them nonetheless.  So no, you can't quite relate to those who do not have children at all...even if it took you a little bit to get pregnant.  It's not the same category.  I'm not trying to turn you away from this thread, but yes it _is_ a little insulting (at least to me) for a mom of 4 to come on a thread about childless people and then make comments about how unbelievable that this thread keeps being bumped up.  

I read your post the way I did because you pointed out twice from what I've seen that the thread was at least 10 months old (implying that we should no longer keep responding to it).  And then you're saying that everyone deals with questions they don't like (implying we should simply deal with it).  I get that everyone gets questions they don't like...but that doesn't mean we can't support each other...no matter how old the thread is.


----------



## my4kids

LuluLovesDisney said:
			
		

> I agree that probably everyone has something they're sick of being questioned about. I think they would be able to endure it a little easier if they had support, though. So if you say you understand how it feels to have your choices questioned, why would you want a supportive thread like this to stop getting new posts?



It's not that I care if the thread goes on for the next 20 yrs - I was just responding to Kennancats comment as to why I popped in again....

NEVERMIND - go back to what ever you were discussing....
I didn't realize people w/kids were the enemy here  or were unqualified to offer a little advise from their experience, even if it was meant to be supportive.   

My sister-in-law who could not conceive had that attitude too - whenever I finally got pregnant and was over-joyed and would announce it to my family she would run from the room crying and make a big scene, and then it was like we were never allowed to happy anymore about anything because she wasn't happy.


----------



## Hixski

Getting good again.  

But please tell me where this advise that is supposed to be supportive is from the folks with children. I do not seem to see it.


----------



## maddhatir

i agree-- 

actually maybe we should go   over on the "disney for families thread" actually i look at it and say to myself....hmmm that does not concern me- so i will not even bother to post....because i am childless....and keep on moving.

this is a bit OT- but i started a thread called (very clear) STERN *FAN * THREAD..... and dont ya know SOMEONE _HAD _ to make one post--- "i am not a fan" that all, but do i really care? no.  SOOOOOOO? why did you even come onto the thread?!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

I don't understand why you would post that you can't believe this thread gets resurrected twice if you wanted it to keep going.

I also missed the supportiveness of your posts- though if everyone reads back there were a few supportive posts from parents as well. 

None of us think people with kids are the enemy. That is why we don't go on threads about how to deal with questions about having more kids, or the stresses of having a large amount of children. 

Everyone is allowed to share their opinions, but those who have been there ARE more qualified because of their experience. You do not have the experience of not wanting children- at least not that you've said to us. 

I don't know what "attitude" you are referring to, but I do feel for your SIL. If you are so happy about being a parent, you can probably see why your "overjoyed" "announcement" might upset someone trying to conceive. If you can't understand why she'd run from the room crying, maybe read this thread a few pages back and read from a woman who was trying to conceive as well ("whatever we were discussing") and see why it might hurt her so much. Maybe you could have thought about her feelings a little bit, too.

I personally haven't decided if I will have children yet, I'm 26 so I have time to make the decision that is best for me, so I am on here to get opinions from all sides and I don't consider anyone an enemy, but I do think we should all try to be considerate of one another and show compassion for the difficulties of others, not tell them to deal with it or interrupt their support system.  



			
				my4kids said:
			
		

> It's not that I care if the thread goes on for the next 20 yrs - I was just responding to Kennancats comment as to why I popped in again....
> 
> NEVERMIND - go back to what ever you were discussing....
> I didn't realize people w/kids were the enemy here  or were unqualified to offer a little advise from their experience, even if it was meant to be supportive.
> 
> My sister-in-law who could not conceive had that attitude too - whenever I finally got pregnant and was over-joyed and would announce it to my family she would run from the room crying and make a big scene, and then it was like we were never allowed to happy anymore about anything because she wasn't happy.


----------



## mking624

my4kids said:
			
		

> It's not that I care if the thread goes on for the next 20 yrs - I was just responding to Kennancats comment as to why I popped in again....
> 
> NEVERMIND - go back to what ever you were discussing....
> I didn't realize people w/kids were the enemy here  or were unqualified to offer a little advise from their experience, even if it was meant to be supportive.


Like Lulu, I'm missing where your posts are being "supportive"...especially when you've made comments implying we should no longer be responding.  No one has called you the enemy, it's how you're responding to us that makes the difference.



> My sister-in-law who could not conceive had that attitude too - whenever I finally got pregnant and was over-joyed and would announce it to my family she would run from the room crying and make a big scene, and then it was like we were never allowed to happy anymore about anything because she wasn't happy.


Ah and here you hit the nail on the head.  This is _exactly_ what I'm talking about when I said you will never understand what we deal with on a day to day basis...and what I meant when I said you're minimizing our feelings.  As someone who has suffered from infertility, a pregnancy announcement (especially from a family member) can be VERY painful.  What is joyous to you is painful to someone else...but instead of trying to be sensitive to the situation, you minimized her pain by saying she made a big scene and then refer to it as an attitude?  And you wonder why some of us don't think your posts are supportive?    Some compassion probably wouldn't hurt....


----------



## my4kids

mking624 said:
			
		

> Like Lulu, I'm missing where your posts are being "supportive"...especially when you've made comments implying we should no longer be responding.  No one has called you the enemy, it's how you're responding to us that makes the difference.
> 
> 
> Ah and here you hit the nail on the head.  This is _exactly_ what I'm talking about when I said you will never understand what we deal with on a day to day basis...and what I meant when I said you're minimizing our feelings.  As someone who has suffered from infertility, a pregnancy announcement (especially from a family member) can be VERY painful.  What is joyous to you is painful to someone else...but instead of trying to be sensitive to the situation, you minimized her pain by saying she made a big scene and then refer to it as an attitude?  And you wonder why some of us don't think your posts are supportive?    Some compassion probably wouldn't hurt....




My post where I was "supporting" people who choose to be childless was when I was saying just answer people who ask about it with conviction (so they won't ask again and it was completely and entirely directed at the OP (and about the first 2 pages of posts - from 10 months ago) all people stating they didn't like having to defend their decision.  I was not talking about anyone who wants to conceive and can't.   

Anyway - about my SIL - I was always supportive of her and (yes I did know exactly what she was going through - had been there for 7 yrs) but in all the time I wanted to conceive I was never anything but happy for anyone who became pregnant - because I truly cared for them and was happy for them.  Yes, I wished I was where they were , but I never suffered pain because of their joy and I dislike that character trait in anyone and I am not going to apologize for it.  I never have anything but compassion for anyone going through what I did.  But when you tell a room of people you love that you are finally expecting, if they love you they will be happy for you and not make it about themselves, and cry, and throw a fit, act like a selfish baby and totally show that they could care less about you, but are only focussed on themselves.


----------



## my4kids

By the way -

i truly came on here tongue in cheek and with a positve attitude at first...sorry if it didn't come acrss that way to you (when you're negative toward something I guess you are just going to see it all as negative. ) Bye.


----------



## Devil_Dog99

De Gustibus non est disputandum

For those of you who forgot your high school Latin, it means no disputing taste (or words to that affect). I have seen it printed other ways before, so save the semantic posts.

What I mean by saying it is no one, and I mean NO ONE, has a right to criticize a childless couple for not having kids nor does anyone have the right to criticize how many kids another couple has. It is none of anyone's GD business. It is a personal (VERY PERSONAL) decision, and one that should be respected by all, regardless of relation to the couple (read: nosy family members). Anyone who pries into the why's and 'you're being selfish' is narrow minded and obviously has nothing else better to do than meddle with other people's lives.

For the record, DW and I do not have kids, we do not wish to have kids, and that is a decision we made. If anyone we know doesn't like it, that is their problem. We love our nephews dearly, we just chose not to have kids. Why? Pardon me, but that is none of your business.


----------



## mking624

my4kids said:
			
		

> My post where I was "supporting" people who choose to be childless was when I was saying just answer people who ask about it with conviction (so they won't ask again and it was completely and entirely directed at the OP (and about the first 2 pages of posts - from 10 months ago) all people stating they didn't like having to defend their decision.  I was not talking about anyone who wants to conceive and can't.


But we're here, so we're seeing your posts too.  If y ou had takent he time to read through all the responses, you would have seen that.  Then maybe you wuoldn't have made a blanket statement.



> Anyway - about my SIL - I was always supportive of her and (yes I did know exactly what she was going through - had been there for 7 yrs) but in all the time I wanted to conceive I was never anything but happy for anyone who became pregnant - because I truly cared for them and was happy for them.  Yes, I wished I was where they were , but I never suffered pain because of their joy and I dislike that character trait in anyone and I am not going to apologize for it.  I never have anything but compassion for anyone going through what I did.  But when you tell a room of people you love that you are finally expecting, if they love you they will be happy for you and not make it about themselves, and cry, and throw a fit, act like a selfish baby and totally show that they could care less about you, but are only focussed on themselves.


  
I deleted my response, because it's not worth it.  Tell your SIL if she ever needs support from people who can offer her _true_ compassion, she's welcome to contact me.


----------



## TinkerbellMama

RC Fan said:
			
		

> I think you will find that most if not all of us who are child-free by choice have put a great deal of thought into our decision.  Wouldn't it be nice if everyone HAD to put a great deal of thought into having a baby?




Gonna have to COMPLETELY agree, here.
I had my son at age 32.  When I was younger, in my early 20s, I was SURE I did not want kids.  I even read books about living childfree, and I liked the lifestyle described by people who had BTDT and were happy without children.  Over time, I DID change my mind, which is not to say that everyone will, but some do.  I knew I wanted kids before I finally settled down with dh at age 29, but our son made his surprise debut a few years earlier than we had planned.  
For myself, I feel that the "I don't want kids" phase was extremely important to me.  I will never wonder if I had a baby just by default.  I started with a rejection of the idea that I SHOULD have one, and went from there.  I also feel that waiting until I was older to start a family was the best decision.  I know I would have been a good mother when I was younger, but I am a GREAT mother now, if I do say so myself!    The time to just be myself, finish college, attend graduate school, date and marry--and not have to worry about screwing someone else up in the process--was nice.  I'm sure plenty of younger women are wonderful mothers, and may have put great thought into the decision to have children while younger.  FOR ME, it worked out so much better to wait and learn more about myself and what kind of parent I wanted to be.  My son has reaped the benefits.


----------



## TinkerbellMama

my4kids said:
			
		

> Guys this thread is 10 months old!  Maybe the OP changed her mind and by now has a 1 month old and is mixing a bottle of formula as we speak.



Or maybe she is breastfeeding!  

Couldn't resist!  If I'm still nursing, everyone else has to deal with my projection!


----------



## Hixski

TinkerbellMama said:
			
		

> Or maybe she is breastfeeding!
> 
> Couldn't resist!  If I'm still nursing, everyone else has to deal with my projection!



The OP responded on the last page. She is as she put it "Still blissfully child free".
Some folks are still in the "You need to have a child at all costs" group. This is not the family boards. Some of us still reading these posts have a tiny chip on our shoulders because of this attitude. Your post we can tell is tongue in cheek. 

We need to hear from some more child free DISers. Whether by choice or not. We are all still child free.


----------



## momomonster

my4kids said:
			
		

> hasn't every childless by choice person reponded yet?



Not by a long shot, sister!    And our numbers are growing every day.

DH and I married almost nine years ago assuming we'd eventually have children. I guess we just thought it was something everybody did, like taxes and death. Over time, I came to realize it was a *choice* and when I saw how absolutely relieved DH was, well, I knew we could have a wonderful life together without kids. I was right.  

We love our freedom (time and money), our furbabies (four spoiled cats), and our quiet, clean home. We have three nieces so far and I'm sure more on the way. Many of our friends have children and we enjoy limited time with them, too.

I don't really get annoyed with people asking about the status of my uterus, but it totally offends me when people 1) assume I'm going to change my mind or 2) insult my decision to be childfree. I told a neighbor we don't want kids and he told me I had *issues*!!! Thanks, buddy!

Anyway, thought I should chime in to show my support. It's wonderful to know there are tons of CF and CL Disney fans, and parents who seem to understand our position (unlike the person I quoted.)


----------



## PhotobearSam

DH and I were soooooo sure we did not want any, he had a vesectomy as my B-Day gift the year I was 29...we were not even married yet...He was 100% sure and so was I...

Now it's 5 years later and we are still BLISSFULY CHILD-FREE...  

We love our lifestyle and the most stressful thing we are doing is running a business 12 to 15 hrs a day, 7 days a week from Mid-May to Mid-October...Then we head to Florida for a month or more. There is no way I could have this lifestyle with a kid...   We love everything about our life with our 2 ancient cats and the new Kitten...(If a kitten is this much work, I could NEVER deal with having a child  )

We have never questioned our decision. Every once in a while when we are asked about it, we say If the urge ever happen, we would adopt...Then we spend 10 minutes with my nieces and we say "NEVER" as they walk out the door.

I love my DH and he is the sweetest man on earth, but I don't want to share him. We are VERY happy, just as we are...DH, Me and the 3 fur-babies...


----------



## TinkerbellMama

Hixski said:
			
		

> The OP responded on the last page. She is as she put it "Still blissfully child free".
> Some folks are still in the "You need to have a child at all costs" group. This is not the family boards. Some of us still reading these posts have a tiny chip on our shoulders because of this attitude. Your post we can tell is tongue in cheek.
> 
> We need to hear from some more child free DISers. Whether by choice or not. We are all still child free.



Well, having worked in social services, let me assure you I understand ALL TOO WELL the "at all costs" part of your post.    I have seen some horrific situations involving children who were unwanted and/or whose parents were in no way capable or deserving to take care of those children.  I am certainly NOT saying that anyone here is incapable, should they eventually so choose (or in the case of a couple TTC, be successful!)...my point is rather that there are many more people who SHOULDN'T have children having them than there are people who choose to be childfree.  I think those who thoughtfully choose to be childfree have a lot of integrity for doing the right thing FOR THEMSELVES, even though there is a lot of negative social stigma attached.  I personally know several childfree-by-choice couples, and they are "good people".    One of them recently retired from her job teaching 2nd grade.  She loves kids, but either chose not to or was unable to have them.  I don't know, BECAUSE I WOULD NEVER ASK HER.  It is none of my business, and could be a very hurtful question.  I'm sure if she ever wanted to discuss the issue, she would bring it up first...but I will not hold my breath nor will I be bothered if I never find out.  It's completely her business (and her husband's), and she is definitely VERY happy without children of her own.  Now, are there any kid-loving childfree couples who would like to borrow a little boy for a brief Fantasyland tour in October?


----------



## my4kids

my4kids said:
			
		

> I think it is GREAT you are all childless.  It is nice to know that people know themselves that well and stick to what is right for them.  Don't get heated when someone questions you about it.  EVERYONE gets questioned about SOMETHING they don't like.  My neice who just graduated from highschool and doesn't want to go to college (can't find a job either - but that a whole nuther story) gets questioned about if she has changed her mind and deceided to enroll in courses.  She hates this so much she avoids family functions and doesn't hang around her high school friends anymore. As soon as someone gives birth to their first child - you start getting questioned if you're ready for a second.  When you get preg w/4th everyone asks "are you crazy" When you give birth to your 4th everyone says "You're done now right?"  I found all of these questions annoying, OK a couple were offensive to me after the 5000th time I heard them.  Anyway - everyone had something they are sick of answering to. Just answer with conviction.





Ok -so you all didn't like when I said I couldn't believe that every childless by choice person hadn't responded yet.  but will someone please tell me what was not nice or supportative about the above statement??????????  I just felt like I was immediately jumped on because some were offended by my username.   Then someone just made the statement "unlike the person who I qouted" - Did you read my original post?


----------



## Hixski

my4kids said:
			
		

> My post where I was "supporting" people who choose to be childless was when I was saying just answer people who ask about it with conviction (so they won't ask again and it was completely and entirely directed at the OP (and about the first 2 pages of posts - from 10 months ago) all people stating they didn't like having to defend their decision.  I was not talking about anyone who wants to conceive and can't.
> 
> Anyway - about my SIL - I was always supportive of her and (yes I did know exactly what she was going through - had been there for 7 yrs) but in all the time I wanted to conceive I was never anything but happy for anyone who became pregnant - because I truly cared for them and was happy for them.  Yes, I wished I was where they were , but I never suffered pain because of their joy and I dislike that character trait in anyone and I am not going to apologize for it.  I never have anything but compassion for anyone going through what I did.  But when you tell a room of people you love that you are finally expecting, if they love you they will be happy for you and not make it about themselves, and cry, and throw a fit, act like a selfish baby and totally show that they could care less about you, but are only focussed on themselves.



Just taking a stab in the dark but I would say it was this post that got everyone a tad miffed. 

And you must remember that some of the folks on here are childless by choice only after exhausting all the options.


----------



## mking624

my4kids said:
			
		

> Ok -so you all didn't like when I said I couldn't believe that every childless by choice person hadn't responded yet.  but will someone please tell me what was not nice or supportative about the above statement??????????  I just felt like I was immediately jumped on because some were offended by my username.   Then someone just made the statement "unlike the person who I qouted" - Did you read my original post?


It wasn't a matter of your username.  I've already explained why your posts are coming across as unsupportive, so in case you didn't read them, let me state it again.

First, you say _twice_ that this thread is at least 10 months old...making the implication that we should no longer respond to it.

Second, you tell us that EVERYONE has to deal with questions we don't like (duh, we KNOW that), making the implication that we should just deal with it and get over it.

Third, you say that you find it unbelievable that this thread keeps being bumped up.

Fourth, you comment about your SIL not being able to conceive and then says she has an attitude and makes a big scene...and then you refer to other hurting people in your SIL's situation as selfish babies, etc.  

PLEASE, I would love for you to point out where in the midst of all that you were being supportive because it's evidently being missed by the rest of us.

*I* pointed out your username because I was trying to show you that you being a mom of four doesn't exactly make you knowledgable on the subject.  We are people without children...by choice or by no choice...we are without children.  We don't go into threads of support for parents and tell you all how to feel and how to raise your children, I'm sure I can speak for many of us when I say that we would appreciate that parents don't come in here to tell us how to feel and how to deal with these situations (because they aren't in our shoes).  No one is saying a parent cannot post on this thread...but you _could_ do so a little more tactfully than you have been.


----------



## KRIS10420

Another childless couple here, by choice, and happy to be DINKS.  I grew up with the intent to have children because that was "the pattern of society".  I became an aunt at the age of 12 and had numerous cousins of which most of them were younger than me and did lots of babysitting as a teenager.  I have three nephews, one passed away of a terminal illness at 5 months old. My nephews were always around, even lived in the same house at times, and I helped look after them. So as for having children I feel like I've already been there, done that and I know full well that not all children are born healthy. DH grew up in a very small, divorced, family and rarely was around children.
DH never wanted children and I kept procrastinating on the subject with the hope that I would get that maternal feeling.  The more I kept thinking about it I realized that I really didn't want children and I would only be doing it because my mom was always pressuring for a granddaughter.  Our thought was that there are enough unwanted children in this world and we don't need to add to that. I also know that I would end up with the feeling of regret and no child deserves that. So DH volunteered for the vasectomy.
We both admit we are very selfish people and like to do what we want, when we want. We both like children as long as they are someone else's. Our two cats are enough responsibility and I can leave them home alone for a couple days.  I thought it was funny, one day I was riding up on a ski lift with one of my (with child)friends. She says to me, "How come you guys always get to go skiing and traveling?" My reply, "Because we don't have children!!"
So here is another childless couple that will be in WDW in September.


----------



## plgrn

KRIS10420 said:
			
		

> I kept procrastinating on the subject with the hope that I would get that maternal feeling.  The more I kept thinking about it I realized that I really didn't want children and I would only be doing it because my mom was always pressuring for a granddaughter.



That's kinda where we are right now. We just keep putting it off because our reasons are to give my parents a grandchild (I'm an only child) and because I have this nagging feeling that no one will be there to put me in a nursing home when I'm old.   

Not good reasons...


----------



## my4kids

Ok fair enough - but back to my first post - which was supportative, and friendly - immediately following that this is what I was reemed with by mking624:




			
				mking624 said:
			
		

> Judging by your username, it's extremely clear that you will never even begin to understand what we deal with on a day to day basis.  This thread has turned out to be a great support network for those who either choose to be child free or those who cannot have children (like myself).  To tell us that we should no longer respond because the thread is "so old" or to minimize our feelings because we're being asked questions that you think we should just simply answer with conviction is just an insult to us.  Being asked if you're going to have MORE children or if you're going to stop having children is not quite the same as being asked and looked at as if you just became the scum of the earth for not doing what a woman is "supposed" to do.




Notice how she immediately targets me by my user name...like I was the bad enemy for having kids. That is why I got a little miffed in my next post....anyway, I can't BELIEVE I'm wasting another 5 minutes on this little scuffle, but I just wanted to defend myself and say that I came here friendly, was yelled at because going by my user name, "it is extremely clear" that I don't know what I am talking about (even though I tried for my first for 7 long hard awlful years).  I just wanted to say...I was not the first to draw the line in the sand.


----------



## my4kids

I'm sorry you did not see my first post as supportative....it was whole heartedly meant that way - tone does not always come across well on the computer...especially for some one like me who has a dry and synical sense of humor, you may not "read it well"  - I will apolagize on THAT point. 

In regards to this:



			
				mking624 said:
			
		

> Fourth, you comment about your SIL not being able to conceive and then says she has an attitude and makes a big scene...and then you refer to other hurting people in your SIL's situation as selfish babies, etc.



Stop right there - I NEVER said anyone else in my SIL's situation was a selfish baby.  I said my SIL was a selfish baby...and believe me - she is!  

and as much as someone may get a stab in the gut when a family member announces a pregnancy, (especially a hard fought for pregnancy) (I know that feeling) my belief is you should do your best to smile through the tears.  Even if you do cry - it can be done in a way that is still considerate and loving of the person who does have good news.   How would you feel if you had become pregnant and someone ran from the room screaming and crying? and your mother got upset about the situation and your brother rather than hugging you ran after his wife?  Would you feel a little like you didn't matter?  Like you were never allowed to be happy.  Like you were bad for having a baby?  Whenever I was in this situation (a couple of times I did tear up) I would hug the person , tell them how happy I was for them, smile through my tears and say "I hope it rubs off on me".  Then I could go privately (without making a scene) and cry to my husband. I am not saying I do not understand -how my SIL felt, but she made me and everyone else feel worse.  My joyous moment had finally arrived -I couldn't wait to tell everyone I loved as I know they would be happy for me - and instead that moment was stolen from me, and I felt like I was hit in the face with a brick. (the brick being the realization that my SIL could give a s?*t about me. ) I could never steal someones joy like that. 

Just explaining the attitude behind that post.


----------



## Krissalee

my4kids said:
			
		

> and as much as someone may get a stab in the gut when a family member announces a pregnancy, (especially a hard fought for pregnancy) (I know that feeling) my belief is you should do your best to smile through the tears.  Even if you do cry - it can be done in a way that is still considerate and loving of the person who does have good news.   How would you feel if you had become pregnant and someone ran from the room screaming and crying? and your mother got upset about the situation and your brother rather than hugging you ran after his wife?  Would you feel a little like you didn't matter?  Like you were never allowed to be happy.  Like you were bad for having a baby?  Whenever I was in this situation (a couple of times I did tear up) I would hug the person , tell them how happy I was for them, smile through my tears and say "I hope it rubs off on me".  Then I could go privately (without making a scene) and cry to my husband. I am not saying I do not understand -how my SIL felt, but she made me and everyone else feel worse.  My joyous moment had finally arrived -I couldn't wait to tell everyone I loved as I know they would be happy for me - and instead that moment was stolen from me, and I felt like I was hit in the face with a brick. (the brick being the realization that my SIL could give a s?*t about me. ) I could never steal someones joy like that.
> 
> Just explaining the attitude behind that post.



Can we just stop this right here?  This is totally off topic!  my4kids, maybe you did have something important to say, but it was many posts ago.  *Just let it go. *  You are starting a debate, when the people here are LOOKING FOR SUPPORT on their decision to be child-free.  This is not about your quest to get pregnant vs. your SIL's quest to get prgnant.  My sister and my cousin did that, and it is tiring.  *This is about being child -free by choice, and looking for support, when we run up against people who oppose this decision.!!!!!!*


----------



## Hixski

Krissalee said:
			
		

> Can we just stop this right here?  This is totally off topic!  my4kids, maybe you did have something important to say, but it was many posts ago.  *Just let it go. *  You are starting a debate, when the people here are LOOKING FOR SUPPORT on their decision to be child-free.  This is not about your quest to get pregnant vs. your SIL's quest to get prgnant.  My sister and my cousin did that, and it is tiring.  *This is about being child -free by choice, and looking for support, when we run up against people who oppose this decision.!!!!!!*



Well said. And now again can we get back to hearing from more child free DISers. By choice or not. 

I also decided to add my 9 year old to my siggie.


----------



## mking624

Hixski said:
			
		

> Well said. And now again can we get back to hearing from more child free DISers. By choice or not.
> 
> I also decided to add my 9 year old to my siggie.


Hmmm, maybe I should add my 1 and 2 year old sons....does it matter that they have fur all over them?    Sheesh, people keep calling them "guinea pigs"...but they're our babies.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

Krissalee said:
			
		

> Can we just stop this right here?  This is totally off topic!  my4kids, maybe you did have something important to say, but it was many posts ago.  *Just let it go. *  You are starting a debate, when the people here are LOOKING FOR SUPPORT on their decision to be child-free.  This is not about your quest to get pregnant vs. your SIL's quest to get prgnant.  My sister and my cousin did that, and it is tiring.  *This is about being child -free by choice, and looking for support, when we run up against people who oppose this decision.!!!!!!*



I totally agree with this.

Here's my first bit of supportive advice today: The "Ignore this poster" feature becomes very useful when certain posters hijack a thread.   

Here's my second: Krissy, have a fabulous time at the Food and Wine Festival! DBF and I are going in November.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Well said Krissalee...  

It looks like we will be at WDW around the same time if DH's knee replacement heals well (it does not look good as he has had complications).

Hope all is well with you both. Maybe we can meet again.


----------



## bumpkin

I have been reading this thread for awhile. I dont usually post much but love the DIS.  This is a topic that I deal with in my life everyday.  I dont choose to have kids.  I dont hate them and I wouldnt try to talk anyone out of having them.  Its such a personal choice.  I dont think Im a selfish person for not having them.  I devote alot of time to my husband and other family members.  I sit on the board for the Partners for Animal Welfare Society in my county.  Like an earlier poster, I have more sympathy and natural care for animals. I put my love in other places thats all.  We have a huge pet overpopulation problem here and I work to help that situation.  I get the negative comments about not having kids and having so many animals.  I have several reasons for not having kids, some personal, but really I just dont want my life to change.  If that is selfish then I guess I am.  I figure the only person that has to approve is my husband.  Why would someone try to convince me that I should?  They do not know the way I feel when Im around kids. (Usually want to leave the room).  And they do not know that I have worked for 2 years to lose 100lbs.  (Cant imagine having to do the weight struggle again after a baby) and they do not know that Im VERY happy with the way my life is.  Some may laugh at this statement but to me my dogs happiness is more important than having a child.  Someday if this changes I will know.  People should not pry...judge..or assume Im selfish.   This is America and my husband and alot of other guys fought to give me freedom of choice on alot of issues.  Lets respect all those who choose different than we do...  Thanks for letting me vent..Ill go back to lurking now.  

Great thread..alot of really goods points have been made here.

 45 Days till Disney-Port Orleans Riverside!


----------



## plgrn

well said, bumpkin, and welcome!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hixski said:
			
		

> I am lucky in that my DH would go anywhere I want to go. He is one of those people that does not care where he goes as long as he goes. If I say vacation, he does not say where, he says when.....
> 
> Still waiting for comments from the "You should have children at all costs group".     NO.......great, maybe a breakthrough for those folks.


Oh, you are so lucky!!!  I am *so* one of those people that does not care where I go as long as I can go.  I've done everything I know how to bring DH over to my "darkside"  of being spontaneous but alas it's all been in vain.   I've sent mushy cards with long notes detailing memories of our last trip trying to get him to fall madly into the "let's go back *right now*!" mindset, I've talked up the trips, left little computer printouts.  We have a great time when we go (anywhere) but he's so darn practical!  
Me on the otherhand, I'm a spontaneous free bird!


----------



## Disney Dee

I am stepping in here to remind everyone to please respect your fellow diser's, thanks, and happy dising.


----------



## Debi

Hi everyone!

Just a reminder that while it's okay to have a dissenting opinion, please do not attack other posters because their opinion differs from yours.  The DIS does not allow personal attacks; any post that does personally attack another poster will be deleted.

Thank you!


----------



## snusnu

Deleting as I don't want the thread re-hijacked.  

DH and I are celebrating our fifth anniversary today.  After deep soul-searching and long conversations, we finally and utterly decided on no kids.  It had been a teeny, tiny question for a while, and we just wanted to explore all avenues.  Avenues have been explored and they're all dead ends.  We just got our third parrot, and they are our beloved babes.


----------



## snusnu

momomonster said:
			
		

> Not by a long shot, sister!    And our numbers are growing every day.
> 
> DH and I married almost nine years ago assuming we'd eventually have children. I guess we just thought it was something everybody did, like taxes and death. Over time, I came to realize it was a *choice* and when I saw how absolutely relieved DH was, well, I knew we could have a wonderful life together without kids. I was right.
> 
> We love our freedom (time and money), our furbabies (four spoiled cats), and our quiet, clean home. We have three nieces so far and I'm sure more on the way. Many of our friends have children and we enjoy limited time with them, too.
> 
> I don't really get annoyed with people asking about the status of my uterus, but it totally offends me when people 1) assume I'm going to change my mind or 2) insult my decision to be childfree. I told a neighbor we don't want kids and he told me I had *issues*!!! Thanks, buddy!
> 
> Anyway, thought I should chime in to show my support. It's wonderful to know there are tons of CF and CL Disney fans, and parents who seem to understand our position (unlike the person I quoted.)



Preach on, sister!  That our house stays clean after the housekeeper comes (and that we can afford to have a housekeeper) is one of life's greatest joys.


----------



## maddhatir

> I throw eggs at pregnant women


HEYYYY! i thought i was the only one that does that!   



			
				snusnu said:
			
		

> Preach on, sister!  That our house stays clean after the housekeeper comes (and that we can afford to have a housekeeper) is one of life's greatest joys.


oh- its that the BEST feeling, my housekeeper comes every 2 weeks and i can keep my house clean in between and it looks like she just was here!   and it gives me sooo much more time on the boards!


----------



## snusnu

plgrn said:
			
		

> BTW, I do plan to have children (whether biological or adopted we haven't decided yet) so don't think I'm a *bitter cranky feminist * please. I just think it's crazy that people start thinking something is wrong with you if you haven't had a child within the first three years of a marriage.



Can I PLEASE have this as my tag?? Please?? I'm a total bitter, cranky feminist.


----------



## snusnu

maddhatir said:
			
		

> HEYYYY! i thought i was the only one that does that!
> 
> 
> oh- its that the BEST feeling, my housekeeper comes every 2 weeks and i can keep my house clean in between and it looks like she just was here!   and it gives me sooo much more time on the boards!



Isn't it WONDERFUL!?  My DH told me that he thought we should have her only every three weeks instead of two and turned white when I turned to look at him.  I must have had Judge Doom's daggers popping out of my head.  Don't mess with the wife and her housekeeper.


----------



## maddhatir

snusnu said:
			
		

> Isn't it WONDERFUL!?  My DH told me that he thought we should have her only every three weeks instead of two and turned white when I turned to look at him.  I must have had Judge Doom's daggers popping out of my head.  Don't mess with the wife and her housekeeper.



HA same here- they can just tell by our face-- and what was his response?---"sorry- only a suggestion!"   and walked away quietly??!   

i told dh, if we dont get a housekeeper- we will have no choice but to live in squalor!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:
			
		

> HA same here- they can just tell by our face-- and what was his response?---"sorry- only a suggestion!"   and walked away quietly??!
> 
> i told dh, if we dont get a housekeeper- we will have no choice but to live in squalor!



Another married without children that has a housekeeper. Hey, I have a 90 lb golden retriever. I don't have dust bunnies, I have Duncan bunnies. I work 12 hour night shifts and my DH works days. I sure am not going to spend the time I have with him cleaning.


----------



## snusnu

maddhatir said:
			
		

> HA same here- they can just tell by our face-- and what was his response?---"sorry- only a suggestion!"   and walked away quietly??!
> 
> i told dh, if we dont get a housekeeper- we will have no choice but to live in squalor!



Yep.  That was his response, as well.  A good spouse knows when argument will be in vain.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

snusnu said:
			
		

> Can I PLEASE have this as my tag?? Please?? I'm a total bitter, cranky feminist.



NO! NO! *****I'm***** a total bitter,cranky feminist. Please, Tag Fairy, please!


----------



## plgrn

Ya'll are too funny. And this talk about enjoying the luxury of a housekeeper one day has inspired me to get my tubes tied!   Well, mabye not that far, but I'm getting close to that point.


----------



## plgrn

> DH and I married almost nine years ago assuming we'd eventually have children. I guess we just thought it was something everybody did, like taxes and death.



Exactly! No joy in the thought AT ALL. I just can't help but hope I'll get that maternal feeling one day, but I don't think it's going to happen!


----------



## PatriciaH

Ragtime Gal said:
			
		

> I have three children, and one of them has special needs.  I love my children, but it is hard work and there are a lot of tears shed and sleepless nights, especially over my special needs child.  (Will she be able to take are of herself?  Will she be happy in life?  What will happen to her after we are gone?)
> 
> I'm glad I had children but this kind of pressure is definitely not for everyone.  You probably hate people saying how much you would like having children as much as I hate people suggesting that I was somehow chosen to be the parent of my daughter and how it will make me strong, etc.
> 
> Do what is right for you, and know that being a parent can take a real emotional toll on you, so only do it if you are absolutely sure that you are ready to deal with whatever comes along!



Thanks for your post. This is one of the major reasons DH and I have not had children. We will be married 10 years in October. My parents lost a baby at 1 month due to heart problems and DH's parents lost a severe special needs child at 12. We could not deal with that and no one can guarantee a child will be perfect! It is such a crap shoot. Even just attitude, etc.. You could be the best parents in the world and wind up with a mean child. I see parents and children that really do not get along every day. You can cut the tension with a knife. Or they are obviously favoring one child over the other. Why? Children are people with their own views and attitudes and as much as some folks may deny it they are subject to their emotions towards that person.


----------



## Hixski

Hey, What happened to everyone that was posting. I hope the mean people that think we should all have children did not scare everyone off.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:
			
		

> Hey, What happened to everyone that was posting. I hope the mean people that think we should all have children did not scare everyone off.



OK I will post something- yesterday I was out running errands- DH didnt care about dinner and I had NOTHING or NO ONE to worry about depending on me to be home or to do anything for them, I stopped at Starbucks and strolled out to the car with no worries...and I sucked in the moment and realized how lucky I was not to have any "attachments"!   

What kind of little moments does everyone else savour!!???


----------



## PhotobearSam

I have one...

This is a "What is the World Coming to..." type of situation.

Yesterday at our motel, a man walked in with his 2 kids. You could tell that they were very well off, nice car (BMW) and very nice clothes. He asked what I had for a week and I told him about our 2 bedroom cottages that have full kitchen, washer/dryer and dishwasher as well as private phone and wireless internet. We are the only cottages in this resort town to offer all those amenities and we are also the newest cottages at only 4 yrs old.

He was very impressed and when I told him the price, he was even more interested. So off he goes with the KEY to take a look. After 5 minutes, he comes back and tell me how much he loved the cottage but that the kids were not in love with it and they are the "BOSS" and they would go see if they found something the kids would like better...  

WHat the H-E double hockey sticks is this world coming to???The kids seemed pleased as punch that they were in charge...When did this become the norm? I have had this happen 3 times this summer...

WHEN DID THE GROWN UPS GIVE UP THE POWER?   

I tried to imagine myself at their age and getting to make the decision on where and when my parents would part with their hard earned cash...It would never fly. 

I would never have even thought about saying anything. The world has lost it's mind...  

To all the parents out there..Take back the power!!!



I will never understand what has possesed some parents to let their children run their lives. Some Parents seem more concerned with being their child's friend than their parent. 

Rant over...

And then I remembered that my cats don't get a say...and they love me anyway...

Thank GOD, we decided to not have kids. I could never put up with the "Well Becky's Mom let her decide where they are going to stay, eat, sleep, drive etc..." 

I love my freedom. I love that we just added 4 more days in Florida without a care in the world...The cat sitter loves the extra cash...


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:
			
		

> OK I will post something- yesterday I was out running errands- DH didnt care about dinner and I had NOTHING or NO ONE to worry about depending on me to be home or to do anything for them, I stopped at Starbucks and strolled out to the car with no worries...and I sucked in the moment and realized how lucky I was not to have any "attachments"!
> 
> What kind of little moments does everyone else savour!!???



The freedom to do things on the spur of the moment. Well....okay, we still have to let the dog out before we go but....

The extra money that comes with being DINKS. 

Being able to vacation more than once a year or worse every few years.

I am sure I could think of more.....

Oh and PhotobearSam: Could you imagine when you were a child thinking you ran things? I know my parents were definately the parents when I was growing up. I think that is why you see sooooo many kids whining about everything today. They have the POWER and at that moment they are not getting everything they want. Oh, sorry folks....ranting...


----------



## KRIS10420

The things I enjoy about being a DINK:
- the peace an quiet.
- sleeping through the night & napping when I want to.
- being spontaneous and doing whatever I want, when I want.
- my paycheque is all for me and not half of it going to daycare and the other half towards the care of children.  My children (two cats) cost me no more than $50 a month.
- I like that I am not obligated to prepare three meals a day and pack lunches.
- I like to eat ice cream for breakfast if I want to.
- I like to indulge, on occasion, without worrying about the influence on children.
- I like to go skiing, camping, travelling or whatever as much as I want.
Ahh, the freedom. Can you smell it?


----------



## momomonster

PhotobearSam, I hear you on parents today giving up their power to the kiddies. I wonder what will happen when these children get their first jobs and realize they can't start as CEO.   

I think the best thing about being childfree has been the time and energy I'm able to devote to improving myself. I'm 35, and in the last five years I've been able to go back to school and earn a masters while working full time, I've lost a bunch of weight from implimenting a daily exercise routine, and I've learned at least three time-consuming hobbies (knitting, pottery, and cake decorating). I couldn't have done these things if I had to care for small children.

I still have more self-improvement work ahead of me and I'm very happy to have the time, energy, and funds to follow my bliss.


----------



## maddhatir

I think I know why parents give some kids the power-- It is for the parents own sanity! It is easier than telling them NO! and Listening to them whine!   It keeps the peace.

My SIL has her 23 months old son attached to her leg constantly! One of her friend's has actually renamed him "the tumor"!

Her 4 yr old daughter is complete opposite, and always has been- she will stay with any of us (friends or family) for a few days (DH and I took her to Disney for 5 days) shes a cool little chick!   but him forget it- she told me it is easier to pick him up than to hear him whine  

I love the kid to death- he is my nephew, but I can't take it- I dont know how SHE does. Sometimes when me and my 2 SILs are together we like to have a few drinks "etc" but it seems she can never relax b/c he always demands attention. (  OMG! actually this is all about me-- b/c I can't have a good time when he does this!  )

And I notice when I make a comment about the situation (never a rude comment- b/c I know never get between a mom and her kid!) she seems to make a lame excuse but you can tell deep down-- she knows exactly what you mean....and feels helpless about this stiuation b/c she created it! I LOVE her to death too- but I just wish that she could just be able to chill with me and my other SIL!

rant over-- for now!   

Love being a Carefree DINK!


----------



## maddhatir

OH and PS! I forgot this story!

Just tongiht DH and I were having a conversation about going down the shore Friday night. He said, so do you want to do the beach on Saturday- I said sure. It just kind of sucks that we can't relax b/c the kids will be with us (along with their mommy- SIL) 

(quick history!- a few weeks back we went to the beach with the kiddies and their mom and/or someone had to get up every 5 minutes, which one wanted to go in the water- which one didnt want mom to leave his stie to go to the bathroom etc. except ME of course, I put down my towel and stayed put the whole time! HEY-- I gotta catch my rays!) history over.

OK- I am back-- DH said- "ahhhh, what are YOU talking about- YOU relaxed, you didnt get up!"   ME: "Well, I  know but with all the activity going on AROUND me it was not very relaxing!"


----------



## momrek06

I have a cousin. She is the sweetest person in the world. She knew she did not want any kids. At age 20yo she went and had her tubes tied and was not even dating anyone in particular.  5 years later she meets and marries a fabulous fellow. He totally agrees with her. NO kids! They are on the same page. 5 years later they are 30yo and my cousin NOW wants kids.  She is so beside herself that she had her tubes tied. 5 years later, cousin is 35yo now and every single year she has a foreign exchange student from the likes of Europe/France/Australia spend an entire year with them, while they attend the local high school in her town. And her summers are spent traveling overseas with her DH to have little reunions with her exchange students. She says I can never have my very own BUT this is the next best thing to that, they both feel.  Her Xmas card every year has her, her DH and the student from that year!!!

Just thought I would share a story of someone that was sorry she acted a little fast in her surgerical procedure.


----------



## PlutoLuvr

Time and -- how shall I say? -- whoopie  

Time is wonderful.  I see my friends and family with kids; they have barely any time to themselves.  It used to be that when the kids got home from school, they'd go outside and play with their friends.  Mom and/or Dad would have some time to unwind from their day, as well.  Not so anymore.  Evidently, the new trend is to keep your kid in as many activities as humanly possible so they have no time to ever try drugs.  My best friend has two little girls; yesterday, my BF worked all day in court (court reporter), raced to two schools to pick up her kids, then blasted them over to dance, then blasted home for mountains of homework (kindergarten and first grade...mountains of homework).  Where is there any time for Mom in this day?

I should add nutrition in there.  The folks with kids I know have no -- and I mean ZERO -- time to cook a healthy meal for their families.  It's always food in a box, food in a bag, take-out, pizza delivery.  No wonder our country is getting more obese by the second!  How are the children today learning about proper nutrition, as well as precious family recipes from previous generations?

Well, the "private" time with my hubby is great.  If we want to run around the house naked at 5:15 in the afternoon and "play," there is nothing stopping us


----------



## momomonster

momrek06 said:
			
		

> Just thought I would share a story of someone that was sorry she acted a little fast in her surgerical procedure.



My answer to this is always "Better to regret NOT having a child than to regret the child once it's here".

Actually, research I've read says mothers who get their tubes tied are MUCH more likely to regret the procedure than childfree women. My DH got "fixed" last year (because the procedure has fewer risks) and we couldn't be happier.

Momrek06, the story of your cousin doesn't strike me as sad or disappointing in the least. Since cousin's childfree status allows her to make a HUGE difference in the lives of people already here on this planet, this story is positive and encouraging. It sounds like her mild regret in not having kids is greatly overshadowed by her contributions, her ability to travel, and the close connections she's made with all those students. How wonderful!!!


----------



## kennancat

momrek06 said:
			
		

> Just thought I would share a story of someone that was sorry she acted a little fast in her surgerical procedure.


We all make the best decisions that we can at the time and with the information we have at that time. After that, it's a question of attitude. Sometimes I wish I'd majored in a different field in college, done study abroad, tried out different cities, etc. As we get older, every choice we make seems to eliminate other choices in the future. You can either get upset about that fact or do the best you can and make the conscious choice that you will find happiness in your life, regardless of your circumstances. Anybody who looks for things to be unhappy about in his/her life will find them, regardless of how rich, successful, loved, or attractive they are. If your cousin has now decided that she wants a child and that she'll never be happy unless she has one, then she's right, she won't be. If she looks back and says, "oh well, in retrospect it wasn't the right decision, but now it's done and I need to either adopt or adapt" then I see no reason why she can't have a perfectly happy life.

Having said all that, I do think 20 is a bit young to take a step that drastic. DH and I would not commit to anything that permanent until we're at least 37 or 38. I like leaving my options open


----------



## momrek06

kennancat said:
			
		

> Having said all that, I do think 20 is a bit young to take a step that drastic. DH and I would not commit to anything that permanent until we're at least 37 or 38. I like leaving my options open




Thank you all for the replies. I have enjoyed reading them all. Yes, and as far as cousin goes...her family (mom & dad) were to say the least "blown away" by her decision. AND she did not tell them UNTIL her surgery was done. She was 20yo she did not need their permission. What I think lead her down this "I think I want kids after-all" path was that her DH was pretty well off so she quit her job and went back to college full-time and became an Elementary School teacher. She got her first job and LOVED being with her students day after day. She still teachs and loves having her exchange students which she calls with all her love "her kids" or "my kids"!   Funny how different life events happen to all of us!


----------



## momomonster

momrek06 said:
			
		

> Thank you all for the replies. I have enjoyed reading them all. Yes, and as far as cousin goes...her family (mom & dad) were to say the least "blown away" by her decision. AND she did not tell them UNTIL her surgery was done. She was 20yo she did not need their permission. What I think lead her down this "I think I want kids after-all" path was that her DH was pretty well off so she quit her job and went back to college full-time and became an Elementary School teacher. She got her first job and LOVED being with her students day after day. She still teachs and loves having her exchange students which she calls with all her love "her kids" or "my kids"!   Funny how different life events happen to all of us!



I will agree that 20 years old is too young to make any permanent decision, be it marriage, tattoos, or *having children*. If 20 is too young to decide _not_ to have children, it's also too young to decide to take on such an incredible commitment for the rest of their (her and the child) lives. I agree with that 100%.

(Sorta off topic) I have a close relative who decided to cover his entire body (including hands) with tattoos and he's only 20. I immediately thought, "OMG, this kid is making a huge decision about the rest of his life." I mean, a lot of people are going to treat him differently. Whether it's "fair" or not is irrelevant, but there aren't a lot of fields that accept extremely visible tattoos. He's just completely limited his options for the rest of his life.

Thanks for the story about your cousin. She really does sound like a great gal, even if she did burn her bridge a little too soon. She seems like a wonderful asset to the community and that's a side to being CF I'd like to see in these discussions more!


----------



## kennancat

momomonster - 

Totally off-topic, but when I first read your screen name, I thought it was mom 'o monster. My first thought was, well, at least she's honest with herself about what kind of kid she's got!


----------



## NeverlandClub23

kennancat said:
			
		

> momomonster -
> 
> Totally off-topic, but when I first read your screen name, I thought it was mom 'o monster. My first thought was, well, at least she's honest with herself about what kind of kid she's got!



I haven't posted here in awhile but I read over the new posts from time to time. I totally agree with you!   It wasn't until I read the signature that I got what the name meant. But that is funny!


----------



## momomonster

kennancat said:
			
		

> momomonster -
> 
> Totally off-topic, but when I first read your screen name, I thought it was mom 'o monster. My first thought was, well, at least she's honest with herself about what kind of kid she's got!



That didn't occur to me until months after I'd created the screen name. That should tell you how "non-mom" I am!

I really need to put more thought into screen names before creating them. . .


----------



## Rozzie

hello fellow Dinks!   

haven't posted here in a long while (Hey Samantha!) and wanted to say how happy I was to see this thread still going.  It is so great to meet other DINKS by choice!


----------



## maddhatir

ahhhhh- just sat down at the DIS boards after taking the day off from work and shopping way too much with mom-   
waited for DH to get home and did some errands on the Harley--- 
got home had -several- glasses of wine while listening to the SIRIUS blues station and preparing marinade for the ribs and pork loin we are bringing down the Jersey shore this weekend.......life doesnt get much better!!   

I bought this great saying by Mr Ben Franklin today, in a nice frame, while shopping today........
it says "Trouble knocked on the door, but hearing laughter, hurried away"

I love being a drinking DINK!


----------



## PhotobearSam

Hey Rozzie...Are you going back to WDW anytime soon?

Just wanted to add...We are looking at going for another 3 weeks over X-mas to see my folks and then head to WDW for another week...Gotta love the extra time, energy and $$$$ we have thanks to our child-free status.

Friends of ours have had their first child this year. He is a very cute 10 month old. He is darling. BUT, they used to go on expensive trips like 3 weeks in Greece, etc...Now they say they can't see going anywhere for quite a while...not till he's older. and they are planning a second child...Looks like they will not go anywhere for a least a few years...

I'll think of them when I'm on a beach in January.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

maddhatir said:
			
		

> "Trouble knocked on the door, but hearing laughter, hurried away"



Ooh! I love it!

A few years ago I found a wonderful mosaic (made with Scrabble tiles) that said, "God I love my life!" I think about that saying often. Whenever it doesn't ring true to me, I think about what I need to change to make it true!   (After 9 months in a salaried job with beaucoup uncompensated overtime and nobody to cover me for vacation time, I'm starting a new job on Monday--three twelve hour shifts per week, no weekends, so a 4-day weekend every week! I think I will start loving my life again real soon!)

I love being a DINK. Today DH and I arrived home from work within 5 minutes of each other, drove to the post office to mail a book I'd just sold (I have a small business buying and selling out-of-print books and ephemera), and bought some groceries...headed home to cook up pasta, drink good red wine, and hang out watching a movie on DVD. Last weekend we spontaneously drove to St Augustine, ate at our two favorite restaurants, and spent the night!  (Not TOO spontaneously, 'cause we had to call our pet sitter   ).


----------



## Flyerfan

Just found this today as I am usually over on the Resort or Park boards.  We are fellow DINK's.....not even a pet!  Have to do something about the pet thing.   We've been married for 9 years and love the freedom.  We love to just pick up and go, especially to WDW.  And when people, who've never been there give me that line, "WDW is for kids".  Uggh.  Yes, it's great for kids, but I think it's great for adults as well.  I wish I could make them understand.  We are kids at heart when we're there!

To the OP....people have actually stopped asking us about kids.  It's been a while since anyone has approached me about it.  After the initial, "Do you have kids?"  I think the "why not?" is none of their business.


----------



## Hixski

Flyerfan said:
			
		

> Just found this today as I am usually over on the Resort or Park boards.  We are fellow DINK's.....not even a pet!  Have to do something about the pet thing.   We've been married for 9 years and love the freedom.  We love to just pick up and go, especially to WDW.  And when people, who've never been there give me that line, "WDW is for kids".  Uggh.  Yes, it's great for kids, but I think it's great for adults as well.  I wish I could make them understand.  We are kids at heart when we're there!
> 
> To the OP....people have actually stopped asking us about kids.  It's been a while since anyone has approached me about it.  After the initial, "Do you have kids?"  I think the "why not?" is none of their business.



Welcome fellow DINK.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Can someone please tell me exactly what DINKS stands for...I got the No kids part but I want to be able to tell my friends about it...Thanks!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

DINK= Double Income No Kids.

Actually, DH and I would rather be LINKS (Lotto Income, No Kids)--yeah, we can DREAM.


----------



## PhotobearSam

I would love to be a LINK but we are DINKS...all the way!  

Thanks for clearing that up for me.


----------



## Hixski

PrincessKitty1 said:
			
		

> DINK= Double Income No Kids.
> 
> Actually, DH and I would rather be LINKS (Lotto Income, No Kids)--yeah, we can DREAM.



Ok, All DINKS in favor of being LINKS, raise you hand.


----------



## Flyerfan

Hixski said:
			
		

> Ok, All DINKS in favor of being LINKS, raise you hand.


----------



## plgrn

We are SINKS at the moment until I graduate.   Will it ever end?


----------



## LindsayDunn228

PlutoLuvr said:
			
		

> I should add nutrition in there.  The folks with kids I know have no -- and I mean ZERO -- time to cook a healthy meal for their families.  It's always food in a box, food in a bag, take-out, pizza delivery.  No wonder our country is getting more obese by the second!  How are the children today learning about proper nutrition, as well as precious family recipes from previous generations?
> 
> Well, the "private" time with my hubby is great.  If we want to run around the house naked at 5:15 in the afternoon and "play," there is nothing stopping us



I totally agree! It's just my husband and I and I cook us AWESOME meals! We never eat anything out of a box. The only catch is, I am so used to cooking for only 2, so when we have company for dinner, I have do to some reorganizing! LOL!!


----------



## PatriciaH

Hixski said:
			
		

> Ok, All DINKS in favor of being LINKS, raise you hand.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:
			
		

> Ok, All DINKS in favor of being LINKS, raise you hand.



 My DINK DH buys Pick 6 lottery tix all the time and never checks them!!!   

Therefore, we actually could be LINK-y DINKS! If one of us would check the STINK'in tix! 

You know you are a DINK when you get to spend the WHOLE day on the beach in Margate NJ (Sunday from 1pm to 7pm!!!) of course, with your cooler of DINK drinks- and the only time you HAVE to get up is to go to the ladies room OR of course to walk up to the Greenhouse restaurant/bar for a yummy pizza and more drinks! ....and then back to the beach ........for a nap!


----------



## Shugardrawers

Gosh in all my time on the Dis I've never stumbled across this thread?  How did I miss it?   Can I hop on the adults only train?

A while back I posted that my Dh is not a "kid" person.  Was I ever flamed!!!  Geez, I needed asbestos underpants after that!!  In fact, I was told my Dh was abusive and I should leave him because he just doesn't tolerate rowdy kids well!!  I initially wanted children but didn't want to be a single parent.  I had a short, unstable marriage in my 20's but didn't marry Dh until I was 36.  By then I'd already had a hysterectomy due to endometrioisis and cancer.  Neither of us is interested in adoption or other methods of becoming parents.  We simply aren't interested in being parents period.  

I'm a bit more tolerant of kids than my Dh but have learned to embrace my unencumbered lifestyle.  What really cracks me up is people who can't figure out what I see in WDW.  They try to tell me it's for kids and they like to remind me the place will be over-run with children.  Just because I don't have or want children doesn't mean I want to boil them and eat them for dinner!!   

Anyway, very nice to know there are others like me who just don't have that maternal gene and don't think they are abnormal for being that way


----------



## maddhatir

Shugardrawers said:
			
		

> Gosh in all my time on the Dis I've never stumbled across this thread?  How did I miss it?   Can I hop on the adults only train?
> 
> A while back I posted that my Dh is not a "kid" person.  Was I ever flamed!!!  Geez, I needed asbestos underpants after that!!  In fact, I was told my Dh was abusive and I should leave him because he just doesn't tolerate rowdy kids well!!  I initially wanted children but didn't want to be a single parent.  I had a short, unstable marriage in my 20's but didn't marry Dh until I was 36.  By then I'd already had a hysterectomy due to endometrioisis and cancer.  Neither of us is interested in adoption or other methods of becoming parents.  We simply aren't interested in being parents period.
> 
> I'm a bit more tolerant of kids than my Dh but have learned to embrace my unencumbered lifestyle.  What really cracks me up is people who can't figure out what I see in WDW.  They try to tell me it's for kids and they like to remind me the place will be over-run with children.  Just because I don't have or want children doesn't mean I want to boil them and eat them for dinner!!
> 
> Anyway, very nice to know there are others like me who just don't have that maternal gene and don't think they are abnormal for being that way



Welcome Shugardrawers- I am very happy to read your tag that you are a survivor   

It seems the thread has turned into the DINK thread! Come and share your DINK stories!


----------



## DizzKneeGeek

Wow!! How did I miss this thread?? I know it's old; but I'm going to post my thoughts on this subject anyway. I'm sure somebody will read it.

Here's our story. Princess Fontaine and I are both 33 years old. We met and started dating before either of us could even drive legally. We got married when we were 19 and have been happily married for dang near 14 years now. We are both only children. So, if we had kids they would have no cousins, aunts or uncles.

We do not have children. Nor do we ever plan on having any. If one more person tells me we're being selfish; I'm gonna snap! Why is it being selfish to make an informed choice to not contribute to overpopulating this planet? I'm thankfully reminded by my mom that there is no requirement to procreate. Our parents are a bit disappointed that they will never have any grandkids but they all respect our descision and tell us that having kids just so they can be grandparents isn't a very good reason.

DW and I enjoy our lives with our dogs and us. And we both work jobs where we choose our own work schedules and enjoy being able to go and do as we please, when we please. Having a child would change that. And that's not a change we want to make. Another factor is that we both work nights and know that having a child on a night schedule is not good. And again, it's something we don't want to change. 

When people ask why we don't have kids I just say that we don't want any and try to leave it at that. But I'm getting seriously tired of being asked the question.

I believe that asking me why I don't have kids and then hassling me about my choice is just as rude as if I asked you why 'you' have _so many_ kids. That's not very nice is it?

And as to WDW being mainly for kids???...??? um...if it wasn't for the adults; there would be no kids there anyway. I'm not aware of many 2-12 year olds that can pay their own way to the world.

In summation: if you have kids and enjoy them...great!! if you have kids and are miserable...it was your choice. if you dont have kids but want them and can't have them...my heart goes out to you. if you don't have kids and don't want to have kids...you're not being selfish. do what you feel is right.

p.s. I don't want to come off as sounding anti-kid, cause I'm not. I'm just anti-being harrassed because of my choices.


----------



## Hixski

DizzKneeGeek said:
			
		

> Wow!! How did I miss this thread?? I know it's old; but I'm going to post my thoughts on this subject anyway. I'm sure somebody will read it.
> 
> Here's our story. Princess Fontaine and I are both 33 years old. We met and started dating before either of us could even drive legally. We got married when we were 19 and have been happily married for dang near 14 years now. We are both only children. So, if we had kids they would have no cousins, aunts or uncles.
> 
> We do not have children. Nor do we ever plan on having any. If one more person tells me we're being selfish; I'm gonna snap! Why is it being selfish to make an informed choice to not contribute to overpopulating this planet? I'm thankfully reminded by my mom that there is no requirement to procreate. Our parents are a bit disappointed that they will never have any grandkids but they all respect our descision and tell us that having kids just so they can be grandparents isn't a very good reason.
> 
> DW and I enjoy our lives with our dogs and us. And we both work jobs where we choose our own work schedules and enjoy being able to go and do as we please, when we please. Having a child would change that. And that's not a change we want to make. Another factor is that we both work nights and know that having a child on a night schedule is not good. And again, it's something we don't want to change.
> 
> When people ask why we don't have kids I just say that we don't want any and try to leave it at that. But I'm getting seriously tired of being asked the question.
> 
> I believe that asking me why I don't have kids and then hassling me about my choice is just as rude as if I asked you why 'you' have _so many_ kids. That's not very nice is it?
> 
> And as to WDW being mainly for kids???...??? um...if it wasn't for the adults; there would be no kids there anyway. I'm not aware of many 2-12 year olds that can pay their own way to the world.
> 
> In summation: if you have kids and enjoy them...great!! if you have kids and are miserable...it was your choice. if you dont have kids but want them and can't have them...my heart goes out to you. if you don't have kids and don't want to have kids...you're not being selfish. do what you feel is right.
> 
> p.s. I don't want to come off as sounding anti-kid, cause I'm not. I'm just anti-being harrassed because of my choices.



DH and I are 46 and 47. I work 12hr night shifts. DH works very early morning hours. The neighbors call us the Vampire couple. Everyone has given up on us having children. So you only have about 10 or so more years of the harrassment before they give up.   

Go DINKS!!!


----------



## DizzKneeGeek

Hixski said:
			
		

> DH and I are 46 and 47. I work 12hr night shifts. DH works very early morning hours. The neighbors call us the Vampire couple. Everyone has given up on us having children. So you only have about 10 or so more years of the harrassment before they give up.
> 
> Go DINKS!!!


we've got a pretty good set up here in our neighborhood.we've got a night shift family(us), an early am shift family and a midday family. so someone is always awake and keeping the street safe. didnt know what a dink was till just a bit ago. but we are dinks and love it.


----------



## Shugardrawers

Well, for health reasons I'm not working now or for the forseeable future so we only have one income.  Does that make us SINKS???


----------



## DizzKneeGeek

Shugardrawers said:
			
		

> Well, for health reasons I'm not working now or for the forseeable future so we only have one income.  Does that make us SINKS???


i guess a SINK is better than a NINK(No Income No Kids) or better yet a NILK(No Income Lotsa Kids)


----------



## kennancat

Don't remember if I've already mentioned this one, but DH told me one he'd heard recently as the next step after DINK: SITCOM: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. Yeah, we'll take DINK


----------



## PrincessKitty1

DizzKneeGeek said:
			
		

> i guess a SINK is better than a NINK(No Income No Kids) or better yet a NILK(No Income Lotsa Kids)



Hey, I'd love to be a SINK if we could afford it (of course, both DH and I would like to be the non-working part of the couple!   ).

We were NINKs when we went back to school in our late 30s--tried to work, but our school programs were just too intense (and our middle-aged brains couldn't handle working AND school). We were very thankful for government student loans!


----------



## Mischa

DizzKneeGeek said:
			
		

> Wow!! How did I miss this thread?? I know it's old; but I'm going to post my thoughts on this subject anyway. I'm sure somebody will read it.
> 
> When people ask why we don't have kids I just say that we don't want any and try to leave it at that. But I'm getting seriously tired of being asked the question.
> 
> I believe that asking me why I don't have kids and then hassling me about my choice is just as rude as if I asked you why 'you' have _so many_ kids. That's not very nice is it?
> 
> And as to WDW being mainly for kids???...??? um...if it wasn't for the adults; there would be no kids there anyway. I'm not aware of many 2-12 year olds that can pay their own way to the world.
> 
> In summation: if you have kids and enjoy them...great!! if you have kids and are miserable...it was your choice. if you dont have kids but want them and can't have them...my heart goes out to you. if you don't have kids and don't want to have kids...you're not being selfish. do what you feel is right.
> 
> p.s. I don't want to come off as sounding anti-kid, cause I'm not. I'm just anti-being harrassed because of my choices.



I agree with you!  I hate people asking and asking me about kids.  In our situation - we've been married for 15 years, want kids and have tried (and spent lots of $$$$ on trying) for the past 10 years to have them and have been unsuccessful.  The questions we have gotten over the past 15 years have been rude and very personal.  And because they don't know what we have been going through the questions really are hurtful!  I finally started answering their questions with a question:  "well, now that is a very personal question.  Gee, why do you want to be so nosy?"  That usually shut them up.  "Luckily" now that we're older people have assumed that we just don't like or want kids.  To that I say "whatever!"  I just love when people make assumptions about other people!

Now those folks who have kids and ask me how many kids I have they almost freak when I start "gushing" about my furbabies Muffy & Kaht.  And like every proud parent I whip out my pictures of my 4-legged babies.  But what's really funny - they usually don't have any pictures of their 2-legged kids.     what's up with that?    

And I believe Disney is for kids (we're all just big kids - right?)  So Disney is for kids of ALL ages!

just my 2 cents!


----------



## WDWguru

I always liked the term THINKers - Two Healthy Incomes, No Kids


----------



## BrookeFL

my neighbor is 35 ad had her dh get a vasectomy.
she simply tells people:
I am to selfish.
We talked about it 1 time very openly (We hang out a lot, I have 1 1/2 year old triplets and a 4 year old). 
She thinks I am a wonderful mother and reminds me of it all te time.
I still dont toally get it, but I guess thats because I always wanted kids. I dont NEED to get it!
Just like she doesnt NEED to get that I want 1 more child!

We respect each other.
For now on tell people the truth.
just like she does.
You LIKE your life the way it is, you dont want to share it with a kid.

If they continue just say, look I have had this conversation so many times, do we really need to talk about this?


----------



## kennancat

Okay, so random thoughts here. Last night, I started watching Dr. Phil, and it was about feuding newlywed couples on the verge of divorce. After watching the first couple rant and rave at each other, I'm thinking these two need to just get divorced and move on. I'm usually for saving the marriage, but there was so much ugliness for such a young marriage that I'm not sure it was salvageable. But of course, then they mention the kid/kids. Now, my first thought is yeah, that's going to complicate things. My second is why on earth would these people bring children into this horrible relationship?!? What the heck were they thinking? The second couple was pretty much the same way (and had kids too), so I turned the show off after that. So who else out there watches these shows and really wonders what kind of thought process these people are going through before choosing to have children?


----------



## Shugardrawers

Couples like that remind me of Chris Knight and Adrian Curry on My Fair Brady.  If you have that many issues before you've even gotten engaged, *WHY IN GOD'S NAME ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED*????  That's not love, that's sadism/masochism at it's worst!


----------



## Hixski

kennancat said:
			
		

> Okay, so random thoughts here. Last night, I started watching Dr. Phil, and it was about feuding newlywed couples on the verge of divorce. After watching the first couple rant and rave at each other, I'm thinking these two need to just get divorced and move on. I'm usually for saving the marriage, but there was so much ugliness for such a young marriage that I'm not sure it was salvageable. But of course, then they mention the kid/kids. Now, my first thought is yeah, that's going to complicate things. My second is why on earth would these people bring children into this horrible relationship?!? What the heck were they thinking? The second couple was pretty much the same way (and had kids too), so I turned the show off after that. So who else out there watches these shows and really wonders what kind of thought process these people are going through before choosing to have children?



I don't usually watch those shows. Now and again I will flip channels and watch for awhile. Some on those couples are nuts. The one thing that makes me crazy is when they say they had children thinking it would make the marriage better.  They are already on the verge of divorce. Lets just add 10 times more stress by adding children to the mix. And people wonder where all these dysfunctional people come from. Imagine growing up knowing Mom and Dad had you just to save their marriage.   That's some right smart thinking there folks.


----------



## Shugardrawers

That's exactly why I didn't have children with my first husband.  We hadn't even left the honeymoon suite before I knew the marriage was in trouble.  How could I in good conscience bring a child into that???


----------



## WDWguru

That's the thing though - most people DON'T think about it on any real level. They just follow the life script and do it because that's what you're "supposed" to do. I think that's why many are threatened by childfree people - they didn't realize they HAD a choice.


----------



## LindsayDunn228

WDWguru said:
			
		

> That's the thing though - most people DON'T think about it on any real level. They just follow the life script and do it because that's what you're "supposed" to do. *I think that's why many are threatened by childfree people - they didn't realize they HAD a choice*.


----------



## Beatles_Girl

Shugardrawers I LOVE YOUR DOG!!! its soo cute!!!


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:
			
		

> That's the thing though - most people DON'T think about it on any real level. They just follow the life script and do it because that's what you're "supposed" to do. I think that's why many are threatened by childfree people - they didn't realize they HAD a choice.



ITA!!!! I Love it!


----------



## kennancat

WDWguru said:
			
		

> That's the thing though - most people DON'T think about it on any real level.


I guess it's just hard for me to understand not thinking about it. I think part of it comes from the perception of an unplanned pregnancy. Even when I assumed I would have children, the idea of becoming pregnant without having planned it was catastrophic to me. As far as I was concerned, it would have been the end of everything I'd hoped for my life. I remember having a discussion with some friends of ours because I was shocked that they weren't using any birth control other than condoms. To me, that seemed so unreliable that I couldn't understand why they wouldn't use something more effective (I know, way too personal of a discussion). But to them, if they had failed, it wouldn't have been a big deal - just starting on the kids plan a little earlier than they'd expected. Of course, they're shocked now that DH and I still don't want kids, so I guess it works both ways


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:
			
		

> The one thing that makes me crazy is when they say they had children thinking it would make the marriage better.


Oh, I was going to add that I know a couple who did this. We don't know them too well - friends of friends really. Now they've got their 2 kids, and it sounds like things are still miserable. I know that she's said that she doesn't like marriage and doesn't see getting married again if her husband passed away. He treats her poorly (comes from a very patriarchal religion that gives all the power to the husband) but she dropped out of college and hasn't had a job outside the home in years, so she's stuck. It's very sad. I rarely see them, but I'm wondering how to send subliminal messages to their daughters next time I do: "Go to college... get a degree..."


----------



## PrincessKitty1

WDWguru said:
			
		

> That's the thing though - most people DON'T think about it on any real level. They just follow the life script and do it because that's what you're "supposed" to do. I think that's why many are threatened by childfree people - they didn't realize they HAD a choice.



Oh yeah, one of my co-workers used to say proudly, "If anybody ever told me I would be 25 years old with 5 kids, I would never have believed them!" Yes, all 5 of her kids just "happened"--she never married, and they have different daddies. Her business, but my point is it never occured to her to PLAN her pregnancies.  

Another co-worker of mine DID plan her pregnancy in her early 30s. She and her partner had been together for 10 years, had a house, etc. and weren't really sure what to do next (her words!). Having a child seemed like the logical next step (after all, it's the societal default--MY words   ). Her daughter was 3 years old when we met and, when my co-worker heard that I didn't have children, she said, "Well, DON'T HAVE ANY." She said she loved her daughter but that if she'd known how hard it was to raise a child she would never, ever have chosen to have children.

Enough about that....  I just started my new job and worked Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday for 12 hours each day, and have Thurs-Sunday off every week. It has been a blast!! DH and I have eaten out a couple of times, I went to see The Devil Wears Prada with a friend, and I went to an estate sale (they start on Thursdays and Fridays around here), found some great ephemera to sell on Amazon, and bought a beautiful vintage turquoise and enamelled pendant for myself. And still have 2 days left in the weekend. God I love my life!


----------



## alisongkc

Saw this thread and just had to comment...

I'm a 45 year old professional woman who...gasp!!!...never really wanted kids.
I joke; when someone brings a baby into a room, and all the women cluster around cooing, my response is usually, "Oh, a baby."  Someone brings a puppy into the room...now that's a different story altogether.  I never played with dolls as a girl, only horse models.  I adore most animals.  Can't imagine life without a dog and a horse in it, and in fact have one of each.  But just never really wanted children.  And now that I've been teaching for about 15 years at the college level I can tell you that I've done my part to help raise other folks' kids.  Yes, it does take a village, and I'm part of that village.  Just don't make me do it 24/7.

Does any of that make me selfish?  Probably.  But then at least I have always made a conscious choice about my fertility, and saved the motherhood trials for those who truly enjoy all of the sweet agony and ecstasy.  I only wish that more women made the same conscious choices, rather than find themselves in places they'd rather not be.  Jackie Kennedy was right, most important job most folks will ever do is raise a child.  More people should probably take the job on with the commitment it - and children - deserve.

Here ends the personal testimonial.


----------



## zima-cheryl

I'm going to jump in on this thread too.  We are 10yr DINK's and happy as can be.  Our biggest wish is that Disney would open a 'child-free' hotel on property.  I realize they couldn't do a big resort, but I think there are enough of us out here that we could fill up a hotel!  How sweet...no unsupervised kids @ the pool, or in the bar, or running up & down the halls all hours of the day & night.  Ahh...that would be wonderful!


----------



## DanceRC28

Personally, I can't wait to be a mommy!!!  DH needs a little bit more time, but I'm working on him      That being said, I have a lot of friends who have already decided that they don't want children, a decision I totally respect.  My sister has also decided that she doesn't want to be a mom, and I think it's just a matter of choice.  I think knowing what you want, and what you don't want are very important in life, otherwise you might end up very unhappy and resentful.  We all want different things from our lives, it's what make the world go round.  Don't let anyone ever make you feel that your choices are invalid or incorrect, it's your life, not theirs!


----------



## D-ko

I am in the same boat as you! I am 32 as well - been married since I was 20. We never wanted kids and still don't.

I hate to admit it, but I just lie to people now. "Not yet!" .. there is no yet - but it hurts to be ridiculed for this - I don't feel like there is anything wrong with our decision.

I have my career and I make a great living and things are just right. We love the way things have been and are and have no intention of changing it. Life is simple, calm and fufilling. I love this man more than anything on Earth. 

People don't seem to understand


----------



## alisongkc

Dear Dania,

I know how hard it can be sometimes when you get the sense that someone is judging you for NOT having children.  Or worse, pitying you.  Me, I still struggle with the Anglo-Catholic guilt monster that says that all good people _should_ be fruitful and multiply - or assume the mantle of perpetual selfishness.

The good news?  As time goes by folks stop asking.  Either they figure you really are selfish (and like you anyway...) or that you couldn't reproduce, and so don't want to bring up a 'painful' subject.  In other words, eventually the problem goes away.  The other thing that happens is that as you get closer to 40 is that things that seemed problematic or difficult in the past no longer have the resonance they did before.

The bad news?  As you get closer to 40 you start to wonder if you made the right choice.  For me it was the death of my father in my mid 30s.  Since my mother died when I was 21, by the time I got to my late 30s I started to think maybe I _should_ have at least one child because otherwise I'd have no "family."  Luckily that insanity passed when the grief over my father's death receeded.  I'm very glad I took Hospice's advice to not make any big decisions in the 12-18 months after he died.

And so, the best I can leave you with is that living for the good opinions of others is a dangerous path to tread.  At the end of the day, it is your life you've got to lead.  Do it on your terms.  And then be the best aunt, or role model to the kids in your friend's and family's lives.  After a while, folks end up saying, "What a shame Dania didn't have kids.  She'd have made a teriffic mother."  And you'll smile when you overhear them, and know that you made the best choice you could make - given your own mortal limitations.

Be good to yourself girl,

Alison


----------



## senecabeach

alisongkc....


> The bad news? As you get closer to 40 you start to wonder if you made the right choice.



actually all those questions came to me after 26 wonderful years of being "DINKS", Disney every year since 71', traveling together, doing everything, buy anything ....what a "Great Life" !!  

....until....

Charlie's unexpected passing.  

OK ..life goes on...So here I am...just turning 60... still asking myself... was it really a good choice?  
"Stuff" certainly doesn't matter..."Loved Ones DO"....

Life sure isn't the same....but my memories   certainly help keep me grounded as well as my "wonderful dogs", same litter sisters lab/pointer,...and...yep, still travelling and doing.  (Chas is always with me ) 

My now questions seem to be..who do I leave my "stuff and things" to?    AH...Life's Journey


----------



## alisongkc

Dear SenecaBeach,

Couldn't agree with you more, although at 45 I have a way to go in the Life-Wisdom Department, and so will take your thoughts to heart.

A thought about 'family,' and its loss...

After I lost my dad I was lucky enough to have been able to count amongst my friends a bunch of gay men - horse industry types - most of whom had been abandoned by their blood relatives through ignorance and intolerance. Wisely, instead of brooding about this intolerance, and it's results, these men had found "families" within their community that were sustaining and affirming.  It was a huge lesson about the nature of family for me.  While I have a large cohort of cousins, and a couple of surving aunts, I don't have a close nuclear family to draw upon.  This fact made it even more important for me to nuture relationships that I might not otherwise work as hard on if I had a larger family.  I guess it is true, you get out of life what you make it.

Give those beautiful dogs a hug for me.  You are a lucky woman!

Alison


----------



## maddhatir

alisongkc said:
			
		

> The bad news?  As you get closer to 40 you start to wonder if you made the right choice.



I just turned 42-- and in no way , shape or form, have I ever thought I made the wrong choice not having kids. Actually the older, and wiser, I get---- I cannot tell you how happy I am that I made the right decision.


----------



## kennancat

Okay, it's been over 48 hours since anyone's posted to the thread. Mustn't allow this to happen 

I finished reading _Maybe Baby_ last weekend. Anybody else read it? I thought it was interesting. Here's the cover and description from Amazon's page:


> To breed or not to breed? That is the question twenty-eight accomplished writers -- including Anne Lamott, Rick Moody, Kathryn Harrison, and Alisa Valdes-Rodriguez -- ponder in this collection of provocative, honest, and deeply personal essays. Based on a popular series at Salon.com, Maybe Baby features parents and nonparents alike exploring how and why they decided whether to have children.


Some of the pieces are funny - I loved the one mom's story about how much she loves to drink now that she has kids. I have to say, of all the writers in it, the ones that seemed most selfish/callous to me were both in the parents' section. And I loved the first childfree writer - if my mom brings up kids again, I need to send her a copy of that piece because she explains my exact feelings in such better words than I can.


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:
			
		

> Okay, it's been over 48 hours since anyone's posted to the thread. Mustn't allow this to happen



Did you see? There is another thread with the same "childless" subject!  
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1202587


----------



## Krissalee

I am the OP, and I am still blissfully child-free (this is a joke, as since I don't post much, some had thought I went over to the 'other side'), but I am so proud to be a first-time aunt to Colin - the most amazing baby I have ever seen, born 8/23.  It does help that he looks like me!     He is a redhead!

I so wanted to be an aunt, even though I definately know that I don't want to be a mother.  I wanted a child in my life, just not mine.


----------



## Muushka

I have only read the first and the last couple of pages, but thought I would chime in.

We are OINKs.  I don't work (after 30 years, I've had it!).  Anyway, we are "Cheerfully Child-Free".  I am 52 and went thru the "when are you going to have kids" questions for about 20 years, but thankfully they finally stopped about 15 years ago.  Now people usually just tell us that we did the right thing!

We don't regret our decision, in fact, about once a day I find another reason to be thankful for our decision.


----------



## Liisa

Krissalee,

I wholeheartedly agree with you.  DH and I are in our 30's and have absolutely decided that children are not for us.  I have a niece and a nephew that I love dearly and spoil rotten.  Whenever we get asked by aunts (my mom knows better than to push) we simply explain that we like being "grandparents" like them (nice to have them visit, nice to send them home!)     And I do think by niece and nephew are the most wonderful kids ever!

I will say that whenever we see ill behaved / bratty children while we are out and about - we high five each other (discreetly, of course).  But there are a WHOLE LOT of children out there who confirm to us that we made the right decision!  (And if we have any doubts, we spend a half hour at the local grocery store or mall and breathe a very big sigh of relief as we return to our quiet home with our two dogs and cat!


----------



## raspberrysharpei

I hope nobody minds if I hop in.  Maybe someone can give me some re-assurance/guidance...

I'm in my mid-30's, happily married & we have decided in our life plan not to have children. We enjoy having independence, working long hours, being able to travel & walking through life as a couple. It took us two years to commit to having our quadruped.      We have one SPOILED dog!!    

My concern with this decision is this..Are there any medical concerns for not having children?? Women are given baby making parts for a reason, if you don't use them for the intended use, are there medical issues that need to be considered??


----------



## Shugardrawers

No, not really.  Endometriosis is more common in women who've never had children.  If you don't already have it you probably won't develope it at this point anyway.  As for things like pelvic cancers, fibroids, cysts etc your risks are pretty much the same as any other woman.


----------



## plgrn

This cracked me up. who here can make BINGO?


----------



## NeverlandClub23

Too funny plgrn!!   And so true, unfortunately!!


----------



## Hixski

I would like to know how many of us have heard just about all of those comments. I know I have heard at least 3/4 of them directed at me.


----------



## maddhatir

raspberrysharpei said:
			
		

> I hope nobody minds if I hop in.  Maybe someone can give me some re-assurance/guidance...
> 
> I'm in my mid-30's, happily married & we have decided in our life plan not to have children. We enjoy having independence, working long hours, being able to travel & walking through life as a couple. It took us two years to commit to having our quadruped.      We have one SPOILED dog!!
> 
> My concern with this decision is this..Are there any medical concerns for not having children?? Women are given baby making parts for a reason, if you don't use them for the intended use, are there medical issues that need to be considered??



Not really a concern but.... sanity!


----------



## maddhatir

OK- let me start off my staying- I dont hate kids- What I DISLIKE are brats and parents that think their kids are the cats pajamas when they are acting like brats and do not disapline them. Saying that- these comments are geared towards those holier than thou parents who look down upon us CCF peoples-

So! i if like you or your kids- this does not pertain to you!   

New baby smell.. Hmmm poop?

The children are our future?.The poor children today are lucky if we give them a future to look forward to with all the problems in the world!

Whats the matter, dont you like kids?.ahhh yeah- if I can give em back!

Genetic immortality--- sounds like something Bush is trying to put an end to!

You arent a real adult until you have kidswell then I never wanna grow up to be as mature and boring as you!

Selfish?  Does that mean if I have kids I have to like, pay attention to them, and buy them stuff? Whos gonna pay attention to ME and buy ME stuff? Who are you calling selfish buy the way! 

Its all worth it---- mmmmm? Looks like it.

If your parents hadnt had kids---- then I guess I would have never know then huh?

Who will take care of you when you get old--- yeah! Like your kids really want to TALK to you when they get older let alone TAKE CARE OF YOU!

You were a baby once too- well I didnt like myself then either! Thats why I am still in therapy!

Your child can grow up to cure cancer--- and then the drug companies will shut him up so they can make more money if there isnt a cure- so why bother!

The bible said go forth and multiply- yeah the bible also said Moses parted the red sea- like that really happened.

Its different when its our own- how different- I will like it? b/c yours is getting on my nerves right about now!

THEEEEE END!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:
			
		

> Your child can grow up to cure cancer--- and then the drug companies will shut him up so they can make more money if there isnt a cure- so why bother!



That's sadly true! And how much greater are the odds that you will give birth to a child who will HAVE cancer at some point in life rather than cure it.


----------



## raspberrysharpei

Okay, I am LMAO & loving the personalities.    

Thanks for the info Shugardrawers.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:
			
		

> The bible said go forth and multiply- yeah the bible also said Moses parted the red sea- like that really happened.




As a Christian I believe it DID happen and most Christians you run across will. Try this comeback instead to beat them at their own game.

"Multiply and replenish the earth" was only commanded twice in the Bible. The first time directly to Adam and Eve (hello!!! There were no people in the world...gotta get some somehow!!) and the second time to Noah and his family (hello again!!! No people on the earth. They all drowned in the Flood!! gotta get more people somehow!!!)

Umm...are we in that situation today?? Did God speak to you audibly and ask that you participate in His population program?? 

I can't stand it when people jerk Bible verses out of context to prove their own opinion.   Vent over. Hope that helps next time you get "the Bible tells you to have babies" comment.

BTW, we kinda get that vibe from much of our family and friends. Maybe they don't say those exact words, but they don't really have to, KWIM? I love them, but THEY ARE SO WRONG!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:
			
		

> As a Christian I believe it DID happen and most Christians you run across will. Try this comeback instead to beat them at their own game.
> 
> "Multiply and replenish the earth" was only commanded twice in the Bible. The first time directly to Adam and Eve (hello!!! There were no people in the world...gotta get some somehow!!) and the second time to Noah and his family (hello again!!! No people on the earth. They all drowned in the Flood!! gotta get more people somehow!!!)



But I don't wanna say that- I am not a christian. But you can say it!   

Truce?


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:
			
		

> But I don't wanna say that- I am not a christian. But you can say it!
> 
> Truce?



Nothing to truce about.    Just so you have it to pull out of the hat in case you need it.


----------



## kennancat

plgrn said:
			
		

> "Multiply and replenish the earth" was only commanded twice in the Bible. The first time directly to Adam and Eve (hello!!! There were no people in the world...gotta get some somehow!!) and the second time to Noah and his family (hello again!!! No people on the earth. They all drowned in the Flood!! gotta get more people somehow!!!)


I'm so glad to see someone else has the same viewpoint on this as I do. I've always thought, hmmm, that order was given when there were 2 (or Noah and family) people on the planet. At last count, there are what, five billion? Check! We can safely cross that one off the list and move on to loving our brother as ourselves, world peace, etc.


----------



## plgrn

kennancat said:
			
		

> We can safely cross that one off the list and move on to loving our brother as ourselves, world peace, etc.



Nah, it's easier to point a finger at people who don't have kids. Then they don't have to focus on the fact that they aren't loving their neighbor, etc.


----------



## BettyCv

raspberrysharpei said:
			
		

> My concern with this decision is this..Are there any medical concerns for not having children??



From what I have read, there is an increased chance of ovarian and breast cancer in women who have not given birth.  I would talk to your doctor about your concerns.  Maybe some of the newer birth control methods that reduce the number of periods you have a year may also decrease the cancer risk.

Of course, there is still so much not known about cancer and it's causes.  Perhaps the reason women who have not given birth have a higher cancer rate is due to other factors - that may have caused infertility.  In other words, are the results skewed because a sample of women who haven't given birth would include a disproportionate percentage of women with infertility issues?  If they used a sample population of women who are childless by choice, would their rate of cancer be closer to that of the general population?

Betty


----------



## Hixski

BettyCv said:
			
		

> From what I have read, there is an increased chance of ovarian and breast cancer in women who have not given birth.  I would talk to your doctor about your concerns.  Maybe some of the newer birth control methods that reduce the number of periods you have a year may also decrease the cancer risk.
> 
> Of course, there is still so much not known about cancer and it's causes.  Perhaps the reason women who have not given birth have a higher cancer rate is due to other factors - that may have caused infertility.  In other words, are the results skewed because a sample of women who haven't given birth would include a disproportionate percentage of women with infertility issues?  If they used a sample population of women who are childless by choice, would their rate of cancer be closer to that of the general population?
> 
> Betty



Everyone should remember that there are numerous health problems relating to being pregnant too. Diabetes, high blood pressure, etc, etc.


----------



## stemikger

First let me say I feel your pain.  I think you are acting as a responsible adult and are making a very mature decision.  When we first got married 15 years ago, we decided not have children and I couldn't believe the comments from most of our relatives.  One of them called us selfish to our face.  I didn't take it too personal, because she had four kids and was in a horrible marriage and was filing bankruptcy.  

Then about a year into our marriage we decided to have one child and even with that we had comments.  My MIL told us that we couldn't have just one.  Again, someone called us selfish.  Having my daughter was the best thing that ever happened to me and I'm glad I have her and her only.  I couldn't be the kind of parent I am if I had more then one.  I am totally happy with my decision.

Then when it came to breastfeeding a total stranger told my wife that she was WR0NG for not breastfeeding.  I don't know why people can't just mind their own business.  

I think you made a very honest and mature decision and as far as being selfish, I think people who have more kids then they could afford both financially and emotionally are the ones who are selfish.

I used to say that I married my wife because I loved her not because I could get her pregnant.

Sorry for being all over the place, but this is something that still cranks my gears.


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:
			
		

> The bible said go forth and multiply- yeah the bible also said Moses parted the red sea- like that really happened.



When people say that try reminding them that not all of GOD's children were meant to have children.  

...And if you don't believe that just take a look at all the abused, drug/alcohol addicted, neglected, and mistreated children in our foster care system currently!


----------



## Mischa

I'm beginning to think I'm sorry for joining this thread.  Maybe I'm just being overly sensitive or something, but it sounds to me like we have some bashing going on.

*Everyone is entitled to their own opinions (no matter what the subject is!)  * 

*If someone has decided that they don't want children - who are you to tell them they are wrong?  It's their decision!*

In my situation we wanted children (we still do), we have tried and tried and spent $$ and more $$ to no avail.  I've seen so many quacks, been poked and prodded it's not even funny!  Now I'm over 40, and have found out that I have "pre-cancerous" cells in my uterus.  And if the progesterone pills I am taking don't work, then I am facing a hysterectomy.  Sometimes the decision not to have kids is made for us by a greater being!

We even tried adoption and I was told by one nun that because I couldn't stay home with a child I "didn't deserve to be a mother"!  

So now my dh & I are trying to learn to live childfree.  We have our furbabies (a dog and a cat).  It's not easy, but it's something we must do.  And to hear from all the "self righteous" people about 'what a mistake' or 'who will take care of you in your old age' - let me tell you I think about it all the time and I really wish that those folks who have kids knew what it was like to want a child (or want something special) and not be able to obtain that dream!  Maybe then you'd understand.  

I think those that made the decision NOT to have children - are not selfish or anything like that.  They made the decision that was right for them!  And I say good for you!  Knowing what I know now - I wish we had made the decision so many years ago Not to have children (instead of wanting them and not being able to have any).

Just my 2 cents!


----------



## plgrn

TGIF! And a long weekend at that! What's everybody got planned?

We are just chilling out and trying to get caught up around the house.


----------



## momomonster

Mischa said:
			
		

> So now my dh & I are trying to learn to live childfree.


  

I am Cf by Choice, but I truly feel for those people who want children and cannot have them. It must be so painful for you to hear the comments people make.

I hope you can make peace with being childless and find another goal or fun activity to persue. Life can be so full without having children of your own and I hope you can see that. 

Take care of yourself!


----------



## maddhatir

That would be nice, stay at home. I already got a call from SIL last night to see whats up for the weekend. She is talking about all of us (DH has 2 brothers and their wives) just hanging out at her house and partying in front of the fire (chiminea) and maybe sleeping over. We also have a concert on Sunday. Rob Zombie and Godsmack! 2 of my faves!   

Tonight we might go to the school carnival and hang out in the beer garden. Little niece and nephew will be there, but they are good kids so DH and I will probably take them for a walk white SIL and BIL chill for a bit. Last year my niece wanted cotton candy- I knew she was playing me and she was not allowed to have it, so I told her no. WELL! she started getting the pouty face and knew what was coming. I told her DH and I didnt have any money and we couldnt pay for it!   she stopped and just stared at us like she felt bad and went back to being normal!   Boy if thats all it takes- just tell the kids you are poor!   

Hopefully it wont rain- I cant tell you the last time I have seen the sun!   

Picked up my Disney documents yesterday from the TA!   Went to Target and got my lime green rafia and put my little bows on my mickeyheads I think I will do the rafia bows on my luggage also!

argh! went to Walmart last night to look for a spray fan thingy for Disney and OMG! The kids! Big mistake to think it might be quiet there last night- week night etc- who would have thunk it. back to school crowd! LOUD back to school crowd! Who didnt want the shoes moms picking out- who didnt want this notebook! AHHHHH!   

I picked up some nice lightweight rain jackets in the sporting goods section for DH and I. I have the ponchos but they just are so bulky and confining, I feel trapped when I wear them.. These are nice b/c they are very lightweight and compact to your body-- you can actually use your arms freely!   after we looked around a bit I had to say-- GET- ME- THE F*&K OUT- OF HERE! I have no patience for Walmart let alone a packed Walmart eeeek! 

adios!


----------



## raspberrysharpei

Mischa, I sympathize for you & your circumstances.  We are one of those couples that have chosen not to have children. And we are okay with our decision.  I think the biggest thing with this topic that bothers me is those people in our world that choose to continue having children & cannot provide for those children (financially, emotionally, etc) and then we have people like yourself who would do anything to have a child, who can provide everything, and yet the scales are balanced against you.  

plgrn-Ahh-the weekend.  Just dropped hubby off at the airport.   I'll hang out today,    & try to plan our next vacation.  Back to the job tomorrow......


----------



## Mischa

momomonster said:
			
		

> I am Cf by Choice, but I truly feel for those people who want children and cannot have them. It must be so painful for you to hear the comments people make.
> 
> I hope you can make peace with being childless and find another goal or fun activity to persue. Life can be so full without having children of your own and I hope you can see that.
> 
> Take care of yourself!



Thanks momomonster (cute name btw).  It is painful, but I try not to take any comments to heart (sometimes it's easier than at other times).  We're taking "baby" steps to make peace with being childless (unfortunately it's not something that just goes away overnight, though I wish it would-it would make life alot easier!)  Especially when you feel you are "this" close to realizing your dream of becoming a mom/dad and then BAM! there is a roadblock and your dream just turned to dust.  It can be hard and painful.

And yes - besides work (and making plans to go to Disney) - I have a wonderful hobby of painting    and I've even gotten my dh into my arts & crafts hobby.  He cuts wood out for me and I paint.  One day I hope to have my own (well - our own) crafting business.  

Thanks for the hugs!  Take care!

hugs,


----------



## Hixski

Mischa said:
			
		

> I'm beginning to think I'm sorry for joining this thread.  Maybe I'm just being overly sensitive or something, but it sounds to me like we have some bashing going on.
> 
> *Everyone is entitled to their own opinions (no matter what the subject is!)  *
> 
> *If someone has decided that they don't want children - who are you to tell them they are wrong?  It's their decision!*
> 
> In my situation we wanted children (we still do), we have tried and tried and spent $$ and more $$ to no avail.  I've seen so many quacks, been poked and prodded it's not even funny!  Now I'm over 40, and have found out that I have "pre-cancerous" cells in my uterus.  And if the progesterone pills I am taking don't work, then I am facing a hysterectomy.  Sometimes the decision not to have kids is made for us by a greater being!
> 
> We even tried adoption and I was told by one nun that because I couldn't stay home with a child I "didn't deserve to be a mother"!
> 
> So now my dh & I are trying to learn to live childfree.  We have our furbabies (a dog and a cat).  It's not easy, but it's something we must do.  And to hear from all the "self righteous" people about 'what a mistake' or 'who will take care of you in your old age' - let me tell you I think about it all the time and I really wish that those folks who have kids knew what it was like to want a child (or want something special) and not be able to obtain that dream!  Maybe then you'd understand.
> 
> I think those that made the decision NOT to have children - are not selfish or anything like that.  They made the decision that was right for them!  And I say good for you!  Knowing what I know now - I wish we had made the decision so many years ago Not to have children (instead of wanting them and not being able to have any).
> 
> Just my 2 cents!



I feel for you/  DH and I were ones that wanted a child. But I think we were probably fencesitters though. When nothing was happening we just decided ok, no big deal. We did not do any more. I have heard of too many folks that went through what you did and said "No". I am healthy, DH is healthy so we have no idea why we didn't have children. We just decided for us that we don't care and moved on. We are now 46 and 47.

Just ignore anyone that wants to be rude. In the end it is none of their business. There will always be someone that wants to convert the childfree whether they know the circumstances or not.  DH and I travel every chance we get. We snow ski, golf and snorkel any chance we get. We can go and do what we want, when we want. Take one day at a time, put on your clod repelling clothes and you will be fine.


----------



## maddhatir

My head is spinning going back and forth to the 2 childless threads- I cant remember where I was last!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:
			
		

> My head is spinning going back and forth to the 2 childless threads- I cant remember where I was last!



At least we have two. This is   but has anyone else had endless children banging on your door to buy things. I swear I have had at least 10 or 12 in the last week alone. What is next. Are they going to want us to donate to a fund so we can buy all their school supplies for them. I already live in a high tax district for schools.   Sorry I was trying to get ready for work this afternoon and ring, ring. I am not answering so ring, ring. Ok, I am in the bathroom. Then I hear our storm door open and bang, bang, bang. Hello get a clue. No one is answering. Oh no, bang, bang, bang 2 more times. My dog is barking. ARGHHH.


----------



## Muushka

Hixski said:
			
		

> At least we have two. This is   but has anyone else had endless children banging on your door to buy things. I swear I have had at least 10 or 12 in the last week alone. What is next. Are they going to want us to donate to a fund so we can buy all their school supplies for them. I already live in a high tax district for schools.   Sorry I was trying to get ready for work this afternoon and ring, ring. I am not answering so ring, ring. Ok, I am in the bathroom. Then I hear our storm door open and bang, bang, bang. Hello get a clue. No one is answering. Oh no, bang, bang, bang 2 more times. My dog is barking. ARGHHH.



I feel your pain!!  

I remember a few years ago a child, probably about 8 years old came ringing my bell to sell something for school.  I started to explain to the kid that we don't have children, but we pay a lot in taxes, which is a sort of contribution towards their school expenses.  That poor child looked at me like I had 2  heads, which I admit  I did, trying to explain that stuff to a little kid!

And Mischa (which sounds a lot like Muushka!), yours is a special kind of pain that no one can ever comprehend.  Thank you for being so honest with all of us.


----------



## Muushka

Oh dear, I just killed another thread....and this one was 35 pages old


----------



## Hixski

Muushka said:
			
		

> Oh dear, I just killed another thread....and this one was 35 pages old



No you didn't. We will get it going again. Folks are just having fun over the holiday weekend.


----------



## kennancat

I noticed a thread on the families board about parents having to defend their choice to have only one child (I'm an only myself, so I found it interesting) but it's also interesting to me that even after they've "done their duty" and had a kid, they still get criticized because they don't have second! There's really no winning here, is there?


----------



## Mischa

Hi all!

It has been a busy weekend (at least for us anyway).  Dh & I are into crafting and we took this past weekend (since it rained most of the time) to craft.  (we do "snowmen for all seasons" and other crafty things).

That's funny about the the folks who only had 1 child being critized for not having more.  Talk about rude!      I'm an only child too (and adopted)      I guess my parents never got the "3rd degree" about only having me since they were older when they adopted me.  

I still think people should keep their opinions about other people's life to themselves.  Like the old phrase:  if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything!    

Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend!

hugs,


----------



## raspberrysharpei

How about a little bump &   

I find my internal dialect saying "Hm-mm...the clock is ticking....." 

Can someone pull the battery out???  

My mother is a very busy & strong woman. Dad is gone. Mom has always worked full time, raised the family in the family home, which now occupies herself, the youngest daughter & her two grand kids, and she has the responsibility of tending to her parents.  My mother is my best friend and I really enjoy going home often to be with her. We talk on the phone at least once a week.  

I am very content and happy, being a wife, a daughter, a sister, and an aunt.  I can really lay it on thick and add; granddaughter, daughter-in-law, and sister-in-law.  I do not feel like I am missing out on anything by NOT being a parent.

I just found out a distant nephew(18) and his girlfriend(15) are pregnant.


----------



## maddhatir

I did a few motherly things on Monday-   

We had a get together at SILs house for Labor day- her 2 kids plus 4 more- ages from 2 through 6- for some reason DH and I seemed to be right there in the midst (alone!) of the trauma and reprimands   

1.- when my niece and her friend bumped heads on the "jump-o-line" (aka trampoline) the kids call it a jump-o-line which I prefer!   It was a trauma- the 2 bump heads- I pick up my niece who is screaming bloody murder- her friend is trying to tell me what happened- in the meantime- the friends little brother is crying b/c his sister "punched" him- my head is spinning from the screaming and crying! bring her to mom.   1- down

2.- 3 kids in the driveway hitting a ball w/ a bat (both very soft) but hitting the ball towards the road- the driveway is VERY VERY long- but they would run down the driveway to get the ball! I take a look around-- hmmm-- no adult supervision- I need to step in- HEY GIRLS howabout you all coming over here on the grass and hit the ball the other way! 2- down

3.- ahhhh- all by myself- go to relax in the rocking chair on the front porch maybe take a few pics of the kids playing in the yard- NO- the kids are not in the yard- they are on the front porch- around the corner. I go to sit on the rocking chair- my niece comes up- can you put that chair over here (around the corner) so I can sit on it?- bring it around- there is the 2nd chair with one little girl on it, the other little girl is standing and niece is now sitting on the one I moved. hmmm- 2 chairs- 3 little girls and no sharing in site! And just me   another lecture about friends-- I make them repeat after me-- "there is always room for friends!" good one huh? thought of that off the top of my head in a hurry! niece moves over for her freind. yay- all are sitting. I go inside, a few minutes later- door slams- screaming occurs, someone is bleeding- they must have fell off of the chair. But this time- they run to mom!    3- down

4.- DH and I standing in the kitchen-- all of a sudden the front door SLAMS- we hear clunking of a 4yr old's "princess" shoes- and a "shriek" and the basement door slams!- DH and I look at each other- again- where are the adults?-- is this a test!?  We go down the basement and our niece is having a fit b/c her best friend whom now she hates and is not her best friend anymore is riding the BIG bike! OK- give her the "sharing" talk and you can ride the bike anytime. She goes outside- DH pulls her around in the wagon and all is well! 4- down

5.- ahhhhh once again- out on the porch, this time just me and DH rocking on the porch- no kids to be seen (but we do hear them playing around the side of the house) all of a sudden WAAAAAAA! crying! said to DH that does not sound like niece- we both get up- no it is someone elses kid- no adults around   and a child lying on the ground next to a bike with a skinned knee and 3 kids trying to tell us what happened. DH picks her up and niece THROWS UP HER ARMS! "I will go get the band-aid!"   the little fallen girl wants her mommy, DH brings her in the house. Niece is trying to put the band-aid on her knee- my other SIL is trying to get a picture b/c she thinks this is cute- telling niece to "take off the bandaid and do it again- I want to get your picture!"   OMG! I am in a nut house! GIVE ME ANOTHER BEER!   

I am sure by now after reading this- some of you may need a zanax, I personally had a few beers either one can help out in these situations! 

But isnt it THE BEST feeling to get in your car after all of this and close the door and hear......SILENCE! this is about the time DH and I say ahhhhhhh we love our nieces and nephews but we made the best choice EVER!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:
			
		

> I am sure by now after reading this- some of you may need a zanax, I personally had a few beers either one can help out in these situations!



 I get stressed just watching video of my nieces and nephews. What's scary is that none of the things you decribed involved the kids being "bad." They were just doing normal kid stuff! IMAGINE when they ARE being "bad." Actually, don't imagine....it's too early for a beer.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:
			
		

> I get stressed just watching video of my nieces and nephews. What's scary is that none of the things you decribed involved the kids being "bad." They were just doing normal kid stuff! IMAGINE when they ARE being "bad." Actually, don't imagine....it's too early for a beer.



Actually I am going to knock wood (knocking my head as we speak!) My niece is 4 and nephew is 2- and I have never seen them BAD where it was just unbearable. I am not saying they are not bad (I am sure SIL has some stores!)- but I see them often and I am very lucky they are good kids! Cant say that about all the kids in know that I happen to be around though   they act up more than the 2 and 4 year olds!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:
			
		

> Actually I am going to knock wood (knocking my head as we speak!) My niece is 4 and nephew is 2- and I have never seen them BAD where it was just unbearable. I am not saying they are not bad (I am sure SIL has some stores!)- but I see them often and I am very lucky they are good kids! Cant say that about all the kids in know that I happen to be around though   they act up more than the 2 and 4 year olds!



We were drinking beer last night watching our St. Louis Cardinals. We were at Buffalo Wild Wings. The place was loud and we were at the bar. We could hear a child screaming bloody murder for about 20 minutes in the restaurant part. The whole bar is like WTH. Pretty bad when you can hear someone screaming over a whole bar of sports fans.


----------



## goodfaerie

but Disney made WDW for children _at heart_ 

"Real" children in the parks was an after-thought!   

(KIDDING OF COURSE...well, mostly)


GF


----------



## Hixski

goodfaerie said:
			
		

> but Disney made WDW for children _at heart_
> 
> "Real" children in the parks was an after-thought!
> 
> (KIDDING OF COURSE...well, mostly)
> 
> 
> GF



Watch it I see flaming from the lurkers from the family boards.  

Remember they don't think its funny to even kid about that.


----------



## Muushka

Yup, I once read in the Enquiror that childbirth causes you to lose your sense of humor!


----------



## goodfaerie

I am signing up for the witness protection program!    


GF (undercover)


----------



## treehugger

Hi there!  We are childfree by choice!  We have been happily married head over heels for 21 years!  

In the beginning DH's family put incredible pressure on us to have kids.  Both DH's dad and my mom died in their mid 40's of rare cancers (genetic) and we decided that we would not want to bring children into the world to go through what we did.  I got so tired of the questions and inuendos from casual acquaintances and his family (mine was cool with our choice)  One time a woman who I hardly knew (she just knew we didn't have children, not the reason) called me selfish!  

In the beginning we would just say that we were having fun just going through the motions, but that only seemed to make things worse.  At one point DH's mother thought she would *help* by offering to pay for an adoption!  Oh, and being childfree by choice and being Catholic is not a fun combo either. We have never regretted our decision and are very happy with our yellow lab and cat thank you very much!


----------



## ladyleopard1106

Hmm.....I'm 27. Single.  And NEVER having kids.  They aren't my thing.  I'm all about my 8 hours of sleep, and being able to come and go as I please.  I like having the freedom to do what I want, when I want.  Kids would just complicate my life and make me a very miserable person!  I have an aunt who is constantly in my business about dating and such, and it really irks the heck out of me.  Why can't people just respect the simple fact that this is what I want?  It's so frustrating sometimes....


----------



## eryn the pooh

Hello everyone.
I did not read the entire thread, about page 30 to the last one, but I found it extremly interesting. I hope nobody minds but I would like to tell my story and opinion also.

As the oldest of 4 in a 2 parent, mom at home, dad at work home, I had always wanted kids when I grew up. I never even thought twice about it. So when I fell in love at 16 and had my common sense sucked out my ear, when my partner started saying he wanted to have a baby with me, I didn't think twice about it. Now I was in grade 12 and was graduating soon so I thought it would be great! So 7 months after graduation and 2 months after my 18th birthday, Hailey arrived. 
Now today I am a 28 year old single mom. During the last 5 years I had to go back to school, I've spent 2 of the 5 years on welfare, Ive waitressed at 4 different places and have raised hailey by myself.
The reason I've mentioned all this is because I have changed some of my opinions on life.

For one thing, you cant drive a car or catch a fish without a license.
You can't buy cigarettes or beer until your 19 (canada).
You can't clean someones teeth without a degree.
But any Sue, Mary and Lucy can have a baby, 
I think there should be a year long course, then a month long boot camp and then an exam people have to pass before being allowed to have kids. I think it would help, eh?!

I love my daughter, of course I do, but my life is not as easy as I thought it would be(not saying it would be if she wasnt here),  I wish I knew then what I know now. I don't think I would have made the decision NOT to have kids, but I definatly would have waited!

I admire your decisions NOT to have children. And I think that more people should have the courage to stand up for their want to NOT have kids instead of being scared of the reaction they might get. I am in the middle of deciding weather or not I want anymore. There are many deciding factors, and each couple or person has their own reasons.

My sister has always said she didnt want kids and we always bugged her about it, but after reading your reactions, Im going to call her right now and apoligize.

Thanks for your time everyone and have a great week!


----------



## maddhatir

eryn the pooh said:
			
		

> Hello everyone.
> I did not read the entire thread, about page 30 to the last one, but I found it extremly interesting. I hope nobody minds but I would like to tell my story and opinion also.
> 
> As the oldest of 4 in a 2 parent, mom at home, dad at work home, I had always wanted kids when I grew up. I never even thought twice about it. So when I fell in love at 16 and had my common sense sucked out my ear, when my partner started saying he wanted to have a baby with me, I didn't think twice about it. Now I was in grade 12 and was graduating soon so I thought it would be great! So 7 months after graduation and 2 months after my 18th birthday, Hailey arrived.
> Now today I am a 28 year old single mom. During the last 5 years I had to go back to school, I've spent 2 of the 5 years on welfare, Ive waitressed at 4 different places and have raised hailey by myself.
> The reason I've mentioned all this is because I have changed some of my opinions on life.
> 
> For one thing, you cant drive a car or catch a fish without a license.
> You can't buy cigarettes or beer until your 19 (canada).
> You can't clean someones teeth without a degree.
> But any Sue, Mary and Lucy can have a baby,
> I think there should be a year long course, then a month long boot camp and then an exam people have to pass before being allowed to have kids. I think it would help, eh?!
> 
> I love my daughter, of course I do, but my life is not as easy as I thought it would be(not saying it would be if she wasnt here),  I wish I knew then what I know now. I don't think I would have made the decision NOT to have kids, but I definatly would have waited!
> 
> I admire your decisions NOT to have children. And I think that more people should have the courage to stand up for their want to NOT have kids instead of being scared of the reaction they might get. I am in the middle of deciding weather or not I want anymore. There are many deciding factors, and each couple or person has their own reasons.
> 
> My sister has always said she didnt want kids and we always bugged her about it, but after reading your reactions, Im going to call her right now and apoligize.
> 
> Thanks for your time everyone and have a great week!



WOW! thanks for sharing your story eryn the pooh   

I agree that people should have to have some kind of "parent training" before having children. I would bet that half of those who thought they would want children might change their mind. 

My DH has 3 other siblings. His father left them when they were all pretty young which left his mother to raise 4 kids! And NO child support. She also waitressed her whole life to provide for them. 

I actually just said to DH tonight @ Kohls (after seeing a mother of 2 trying to get her kids situated in 2 carts while her husband was outside chatting on his phone) I think most mothers that you see now are some of the strongest people, mentally and physically. Even stronger than most men. The things they HAVE to do throughout the day (getting the kids ready, piling them in the car along with the stroller etc, getting them situated before going into the store, keeping them safe) is incredible. MOST men can not even handle that for a day!   

I do commend the women who are mothers BUT NO WAY would I choose to do that. Most women say- yes, but you just DO IT, you have no choice-- and my answer is- I MADE MY CHOICE!


----------



## DizzKneeGeek

maddhatir said:
			
		

> I actually just said to DH tonight @ Kohls (after seeing a mother of 2 trying to get her kids situated in 2 carts while her husband was outside chatting on his phone) I think most mothers that you see now are some of the strongest people, mentally and physically. Even stronger than most men. The things they HAVE to do throughout the day (getting the kids ready, piling them in the car along with the stroller etc, getting them situated before going into the store, keeping them safe) is incredible. MOST men can not even handle that for a day!


do we really want to get into generalizing like that?
most of the single parents i know are men.
good men.
men who wanted to have families but were invloved with tramps and drug addicts.
it's a two way street.
men and women can equally be bad parents.
thank you for your time.


----------



## maddhatir

DizzKneeGeek said:
			
		

> do we really want to get into generalizing like that?
> most of the single parents i know are men.
> good men.
> men who wanted to have families but were invloved with tramps and drug addicts.
> it's a two way street.
> men and women can equally be bad parents.
> thank you for your time.



give me a break! I was talking about these womens _husbands_ not being able to keep up with them and their daily routine!


----------



## plgrn

This fencesitter needs a little   from her child-free friends! Our 4th anniversary just passed and apparently people are through giving us a "grace-period" about waiting to have kids.

I just spoke with a friend who's husband could be heard in the background during our conversation saying "when is she going to drop out of school and have a baby?"   Granted, my friend's DH likes to get my goat, and was half teasing, but the other half of him wasn't teasing at all! This was evident when my friend said "seriously, are you not thinking about having kids yet?" When I told her no, and maybe not ever she said "are you really going to do that to your parents?" *sigh*

Today, I had to deal with an issue with the mother of 2 of my students. She got frustrated with me and (along with lots of other things) indicated that I couldn't possibly understand her feelings b/c I didn't have children of my own. Although she didn't come right out and say it, it was as though she thinks of me as less of a person or not "grown up yet" or mature b/c I haven't given birth. As if one day when I do have kids I will just understand everything and be wise.   

*sigh* *sigh* *sigh* Just a little beat down from both these incidents occuring 2 days in a row. 

And I'm just a fencesitter! I cannot image what some of you CFers go through on a weekly basis. 

Thanks for the support! I love the CF threads.


----------



## Hixski

plgrn said:
			
		

> This fencesitter needs a little   from her child-free friends! Our 4th anniversary just passed and apparently people are through giving us a "grace-period" about waiting to have kids.
> 
> I just spoke with a friend who's husband could be heard in the background during our conversation saying "when is she going to drop out of school and have a baby?"   Granted, my friend's DH likes to get my goat, and was half teasing, but the other half of him wasn't teasing at all! This was evident when my friend said "seriously, are you not thinking about having kids yet?" When I told her no, and maybe not ever she said "are you really going to do that to your parents?" *sigh*
> 
> Today, I had to deal with an issue with the mother of 2 of my students. She got frustrated with me and (along with lots of other things) indicated that I couldn't possibly understand her feelings b/c I didn't have children of my own. Although she didn't come right out and say it, it was as though she thinks of me as less of a person or not "grown up yet" or mature b/c I haven't given birth. As if one day when I do have kids I will just understand everything and be wise.
> 
> *sigh* *sigh* *sigh* Just a little beat down from both these incidents occuring 2 days in a row.
> 
> And I'm just a fencesitter! I cannot image what some of you CFers go through on a weekly basis.
> 
> Thanks for the support! I love the CF threads.



We just got back from WDW and VB. Had a great time talking with others. Several folks asked if we had children since we are in our mid forties. When we told them no, not one person acted shocked or anything negative. Several said "Wow, this must be nice to vacation just the two of you." I have come to believe that most people understand. Notice I say "Most". It seems like family or friends feel they need to tell you different. 

Don't let the mother that gave you grief get you down. The CF deal with those types at one time or other. They have the issue not you. Cheer up.


----------



## PatriciaH

plgrn said:
			
		

> This fencesitter needs a little   from her child-free friends! Our 4th anniversary just passed and apparently people are through giving us a "grace-period" about waiting to have kids.
> 
> I just spoke with a friend who's husband could be heard in the background during our conversation saying "when is she going to drop out of school and have a baby?"   Granted, my friend's DH likes to get my goat, and was half teasing, but the other half of him wasn't teasing at all! This was evident when my friend said "seriously, are you not thinking about having kids yet?" When I told her no, and maybe not ever she said "are you really going to do that to your parents?" *sigh*
> 
> Today, I had to deal with an issue with the mother of 2 of my students. She got frustrated with me and (along with lots of other things) indicated that I couldn't possibly understand her feelings b/c I didn't have children of my own. Although she didn't come right out and say it, it was as though she thinks of me as less of a person or not "grown up yet" or mature b/c I haven't given birth. As if one day when I do have kids I will just understand everything and be wise.
> 
> *sigh* *sigh* *sigh* Just a little beat down from both these incidents occuring 2 days in a row.
> 
> And I'm just a fencesitter! I cannot image what some of you CFers go through on a weekly basis.
> 
> Thanks for the support! I love the CF threads.




Why is he so concerned with you having a child? Seems strage to me.   Of course my friend from college and her husband visited a few weeks ago with their new baby and they kept telling us we should have one. Her husband even had the nerve to say "you need to give your parents a grandchild" in front of my parents! My parents could care less if we have kids or not. They feel it is our business. This coming from a man who cheated on her with his ex while they were engaged! While she and I went to get some waters at the hotel gift shop, her husband said to my DH that he did not want the baby even while she was pregnant and even after she had it- but the baby turned out to be pretty good so now he was ok with it!!! She went through painful IVF too! She wanted to adopt and HE insisted on "their own." I also have another friend from from high school that went through IVF and her husband left her for someone else a few years after. Why the he** did you have IVF if you really did not want the child? I don't get people.

Oh and if anyone thinks parents are more mature than people without kids all they have to do is read the news to see that is completely false. Just read the thread about the day care abuse situation on the Community Board and it will really make you wonder about that parent!


----------



## maddhatir

I just needed to vent and I know you can all appreicate this one! Well, actually NOT appreciate the comment!

I was in a Hallmark store today- OK- I will tell you which one in case anyone knows this witch- Berlin, NJ near the Shop Rite! These 2 Hallmark employees were talking amongst each other (but why is it when I go to a Hallmark- some of the employees have to talk SO loud I cant concentrate on the cards I am reading!?  I feel like screaming SHUSH!!! you are annoying me-- this is a notch down from a library- I NEED to concentrate on my purshase!   ) OK- anyway. I was down a card aisle looking at card (la de da) I hear these 2 woman talking about a couple they must know. The one says to the other- "I wonder why they never had kids?"- the other one says- "I never asked- I just thought it was none of my business b/c it may be physical- either that or she is just SELFISH and I DONT even want to hear THAT!" 

 well! you stinkin' b*&$! My mouth dropped when I heard her say that! I peeked around the corner to see if she would look at me (but she had her head turned) I would have went off on her if she would have been looking at me! That is fine if that is your (pea-brained) opinion- but dont share it with the rest of the store!

Imagine if I said, out loud, at my place of work (actually I work from home- so really it wouldnt matter!  )- "I think anyone that HAS kids is an idiot!????" I would be stoned...well, you know.....rocks thrown at me, stoned!   

argh!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:
			
		

> I just needed to vent and I know you can all appreicate this one! Well, actually NOT appreciate the comment!
> 
> I was in a Hallmark store today- OK- I will tell you which one in case anyone knows this witch- Berlin, NJ near the Shop Rite! These 2 Hallmark employees were talking amongst each other (but why is it when I go to a Hallmark- some of the employees have to talk SO loud I cant concentrate on the cards I am reading!?  I feel like screaming SHUSH!!! you are annoying me-- this is a notch down from a library- I NEED to concentrate on my purshase!   ) OK- anyway. I was down a card aisle looking at card (la de da) I hear these 2 woman talking about a couple they must know. The one says to the other- "I wonder why they never had kids?"- the other one says- "I never asked- I just thought it was none of my business b/c it may be physical- either that or she is just SELFISH and I DONT even want to hear THAT!"
> 
> well! you stinkin' b*&$! My mouth dropped when I heard her say that! I peeked around the corner to see if she would look at me (but she had her head turned) I would have went off on her if she would have been looking at me! That is fine if that is your (pea-brained) opinion- but dont share it with the rest of the store!
> 
> Imagine if I said, out loud, at my place of work (actually I work from home- so really it wouldnt matter!  )- "I think anyone that HAS kids is an idiot!????" I would be stoned...well, you know.....rocks thrown at me, stoned!
> 
> argh!



Ahh, the we are all selfish comment. Just when I thought I was getting away from it. We were in WDW a couple of weeks ago. Most of the people we chatted with did not have children. ( Or had left them home) Several told us that it was great we could vacation without kids. At least no one tried to convince us we were selfish and doing a terrible thing. I might have had to bop them with DH's Rose and Crown 1/2 yard of beer.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:
			
		

> Ahh, the we are all selfish comment. Just when I thought I was getting away from it. We were in WDW a couple of weeks ago. Most of the people we chatted with did not have children. ( Or had left them home) Several told us that it was great we could vacation without kids. At least no one tried to convince us we were selfish and doing a terrible thing. I might have had to bop them with DH's Rose and Crown 1/2 yard of beer.



DH and I were talking about HOW MANY couples w/o kids of ALL ages we saw in Disney last week. They ranged for their 20's right on through to (some I would say) 70's! I dont remember ever noticing that many before   ...maybe they all caught on!   Disney is funner w/o kiddies!


----------



## plgrn

My adults-only Trip report is up and running! Enjoy!

Adults only at FW towel animal quest!


----------



## plgrn

BTW, madd, isn't it high time the tag fairy paid you a visit? Almost 4,000 big ones!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:
			
		

> BTW, madd, isn't it high time the tag fairy paid you a visit? Almost 4,000 big ones!



AHHHHH, Hello? Yes. I am waiting for my tag..........  

I feel like an outcast, all of these posts, and never been tagged.........


----------



## kydeb1346

OK, I haven't read the entire thread but from about page 30 onward... I have been married for 8 years as of this past May. I'm 28 years old now (as of August) and had ovarian cancer at the age of 17 which resulted in numerous surgeries and chemo. I'm cancer free now and obviously will not have children of my own. DH and I are perfectly fine with this but so many people say "when are you going to adopt?" We are happy just the way we are and never plan to go the kid route! Of course, no one understands that decision and give us a hard time about it. Especially with going to Disney World! We honeymooned in WDW and have been back several times since. WDW is great and we love it! However, some of the rudest experiences being child free have taken place at WDW but won't go into that! 

Anyway, I am rambling - ENJOY your child free lives and best of luck to those of you who are on the fence!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Whoa, this thread has seriously grown since the last time I checked in.    I was checking everyday for awhile with no new posts being added and then I had to have my house renovated (and be without computer for some time  so I couldn't check in), do a Disney trip which included a MNSSHP:





Don't we look happy?
OK, so it's kind of tiny and maybe you can't tell.  But, we were very happy!!​
the sale of a house (while on our Disney trip  and let me add that the staff at POP Century resort were absolutely wonderful for all of their help in making sure we received our faxes and for faxing things back to our realtor  ).  

Then do a roadtrip from Florida to South Carolina to look for a new home (which we found   ).

I'm going to seriously have to get caught up so that I can see what everybody's been up too.  Hope you've all been well  and life has been good!  I'm subscribed to the thread now so I'll be sure not to miss the latest.

Talk to you all real soon.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

kydeb1346 said:
			
		

> OK, I haven't read the entire thread but from about page 30 onward... I have been married for 8 years as of this past May. I'm 28 years old now (as of August) and had ovarian cancer at the age of 17 which resulted in numerous surgeries and chemo. I'm cancer free now and obviously will not have children of my own. DH and I are perfectly fine with this but so many people say "when are you going to adopt?" We are happy just the way we are and never plan to go the kid route! Of course, no one understands that decision and give us a hard time about it. Especially with going to Disney World! We honeymooned in WDW and have been back several times since. WDW is great and we love it! However, some of the rudest experiences being child free have taken place at WDW but won't go into that!
> 
> Anyway, I am rambling - ENJOY your child free lives and best of luck to those of you who are on the fence!


That's wonderful to hear that you are cancer free!!  That's terrific news.  

I know, don't you get sooooo sick of the "When are you going to adopt?" question?  I know we do.  How about, "None of your business!"?  At least that's what I feel like saying!  We tried the adoption route.  The birthmother changed her mind at the last minute and it truly devestated my husband.  It upset me more than words but I was surprised with how deeply it hurt my DH.  We've decided we are done!!  Done w/ the fertility route (I did have to have my left tube and ovary removed back in May) and done with adoption.  We are, however, ready to begin the rest of our lives together!


----------



## Hixski

ForTheLoveofDisney said:
			
		

> That's wonderful to hear that you are cancer free!!  That's terrific news.
> 
> I know, don't you get sooooo sick of the "When are you going to adopt?" question?  I know we do.  How about, "None of your business!"?  At least that's what I feel like saying!  We tried the adoption route.  The birthmother changed her mind at the last minute and it truly devestated my husband.  It upset me more than words but I was surprised with how deeply it hurt my DH.  We've decided we are done!!  Done w/ the fertility route (I did have to have my left tube and ovary removed back in May) and done with adoption.  We are, however, ready to begin the rest of our lives together!



We got that quite a bit too. People would ask when are you having children.  Told them it wasn't happening so we weren't going to worry about it. We were just going to be childfree. We could admit to ourselves we were fencesitters anyway. That is when we got the adopt option. I think people are much ruder if you confess you ever wanted to have a child. They want to tell you every option, every way to get a child. HELLO...did I not just say we were going to be childfree. Those are the ones you are tempted to just tell "Shut the heck up" (or any other choice words you may have)
Remember these people can only bother you if you let them.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

maddhatir said:
			
		

> DH and I were talking about HOW MANY couples w/o kids of ALL ages we saw in Disney last week. They ranged for their 20's right on through to (some I would say) 70's! I dont remember ever noticing that many before   ...maybe they all caught on!   Disney is funner w/o kiddies!



I read an article in the last few months (wish I had saved it--I think it was in the travel section of the newspaper) that said a full 50% of visitors to Disney are adults without children!!  I think Disney is well aware of this statistic, based on their recent (last several years) emphasis on improving the food, adult libations, and entertainment at the parks.

While DH and I love rides, it's the overall experience (food, entertainment, resorts) that keeps us coming back over and over.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hixski said:
			
		

> We got that quite a bit too. People would ask when are you having children.  Told them it wasn't happening so we weren't going to worry about it. We were just going to be childfree. We could admit to ourselves we were fencesitters anyway. That is when we got the adopt option. *I think people are much ruder if you confess you ever wanted to have a child. They want to tell you every option, every way to get a child.* HELLO...did I not just say we were going to be childfree. Those are the ones you are tempted to just tell "Shut the heck up" (or any other choice words you may have)
> Remember these people can only bother you if you let them.


I agree.  And I love how they make snide comments about how you must not have ever really wanted a child if you don't adopt. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




  Yea, OK, well maybe I didn't.  



			
				PrincessKitty1 said:
			
		

> I read an article in the last few months (wish I had saved it--I think it was in the travel section of the newspaper) that said a full 50% of visitors to Disney are adults without children!! I think Disney is well aware of this statistic, based on their recent (last several years) emphasis on improving the food, adult libations, and entertainment at the parks.
> 
> While DH and I love rides, it's the overall experience (food, entertainment, resorts) that keeps us coming back over and over.


This is why DH and I love Disney.  We're too the point that if we miss a ride, eh, we miss a ride.  It'll be here next time but we just love the atmosphere and the ambiance.  I think I've now decided that September is the best time to go!  It seems that with school just beginning there were hardly any kids there.  Perhaps it's because school had just started and parents aren't going to pull their kids out for vacation just yet.  Alls I know is, it was nice.  Of course, now Disney has started a marketing campaign geared towards parents w/ toddlers called  Magical Beginnings.  It ran for 7 weeks and was going on while we were down there in Sept.  It only hindered our vacation just slightly.  In that, we like to go to MK on the Extra Magic hour mornings and get in the rides and such before the crowds hit and this way we're out of there by lunch time.  Well, with the Magical Beginnings promotion we did not do it as from what we understood only Fantasyland was open for the extra hour and we knew it would be full.  But all in all September was lovely!!


----------



## J.Cooper

We were in Disney during the middle of September (about 3 weeks ago exactly) and we were surprised how many couples and older couples (in there 60's) were at Disney. Not that many kids this time. We figured probably because school just started, but we had such a great time. Nothing like a childfree vacation!!!! We love our childfree lifestyle!!!!


----------



## Hixski

I just read this on my web news. 
http://my.earthlink.net/article/nat?guid=20061009/4529c940_3ca6_15526200610091649462438

What is wrong with people. That woman is nuts. And she had 4 other children. I swear I am going to hit the next person that wants to tell me I need to have children at all costs.  Someone please tell us some happy childfree stories. I need to get my mind off this insane woman.


----------



## plgrn

Hixski said:
			
		

> I just read this on my web news.
> http://my.earthlink.net/article/nat?guid=20061009/4529c940_3ca6_15526200610091649462438
> 
> What is wrong with people. That woman is nuts. And she had 4 other children. I swear I am going to hit the next person that wants to tell me I need to have children at all costs.  Someone please tell us some happy childfree stories. I need to get my mind off this insane woman.



That's horrible! If there is a bright side to this story, it's that the mother's moment of crazed behavior with the infant will probably save the other 4 childrens lives. Otherwise who knows how long they would have lived with her before being put in foster care!?


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Here, please, let me hit them for you!!  Or with you.  

Here's some happy childfree stories for you:

Yesterday DH and I got up late i.e. we slept in   and went out to breakfast where we were able to discuss what our future is going to look like  with the impending closing and subsequent nice profit of our house.  During our undisturbed breakfast except for the occasional waitress kindly filling our coffee cups we were pondering do we take a two week relaxing childfree Disney vacation or go on a cruise?  Also, do we get the 42" Phillips Ambient lighting plasma t.v. or the Panasonic?    Hhhhmmm, decisions--decisions.  Of course we will be investing the large majority of the money but why not live a little??

Then we came home and decided that we really wanted to snuggle so we hopped back in bed undisturbed and reconnecting (on an intellectual level. We were "just" talking and goofing off for the record   ).  It was a fun day of just being with my best friend my DH!

It's wonderful to know that if we want to just pick up and go, we can! It's terrific to know we've got eachother ---- whenever.

Some people will tell you that when you're old and gray, if you don't have kids who will take care of you?  Who will come visit you in the nursing home? Those Disney vacations and Plasma t.v's won't give you love when you're old.
Well, I hate to be the one to burst ANYONE's bubble but my great grandmother was in the nursing home and I couldn't even count the number of people who *NEVER* got a visitor!!  *EVER!!!* The children never came.  And on that same note my own great grandmother sat in her house, day in and day out and day in and day out before she went into the nursing home with 3 of her children in a one mile radius if that (you could see the one son's house from her living room window) and NONE of them *ever*   came to visit her!!  My great-grandparent's started a saw mill many years ago and when my uncles got a chance they greedily cut my grandparents out (they never gave them any royalties on the profits and they were supposed to give my great-grandparents $80 some dollars a week which soon stopped once they had control).  You see, my great-grandparents did not have much of an education.  My great-grandfather went to the 8th grade and my great-grandmom went to the 3rd so when my uncles came over with all of the legal documents which would give them control of the saw mill and all future earnings, my grandparent's in ignorance, signed it.

Anyway, I didn't mean to give such a downer story but I just get so sick of people knowing what is best for our lives (WHEN  THEY  DON'T EVEN  HAVE THE  WHOLE  STORY  like maybe we tried and it just didn't happen) and tell you crap like this.  Well, hopefully their kids will be there for them when they get old but far, far too many are not and our nursing homes are full of them to prove it!!  

We plan on investing our money so that in our old age we will be well provided for.  We plan on getting involved with our new community and help make a difference in people's lives.  We plan on loving and spoiling our nieces and nephews.  And MOST of ALL, we plan on loving and be loved by eachother for as long as we have!!  Which brings me to another point, Shheeeshh, I should just stop already, I know *way* too many people who have kids and yet have no life partner.  So they get to be mom and dad to the kids. Or, I know people who have kids and their marriage *SUCKS!!!!!* They suffer mental abuse at the hands of their husband and the kids get to see it and hear (how lovely  ), and their husband has no time for them except when it's convenient for him. And these people have no intellectual equal, they have no real friend they are empty and void in the area of equal adult love.  And they continue to search for it all the while (sometimes resenting) having to take care of the kids.

No thank you.  I am truly blessed as I am sure many of you are with the love and support and camaraderie of my husband.  I'll continue on in my great relationship all the while planning for our financial future so that we are well taken care of in our golden years and I will make a contribution to society because I have the time.

And I'll be taking my Disney and European vacations and I'll see the world.  And I'll enjoy the luxuries of life and I won't be beatin' nobody w/ my babies!!!


----------



## Hixski

I just remembered a comment about my childfree life from the other day. I was in Hallmark looking at ornaments. DH was with me. I was not with him at the moment but a lady saw that I had several ornaments. She asked if I had a large tree. I said yes, but I have 5 of them. Her next question was. "Do you have children" Uh, no. So she said "You have 5 Christmas trees and you don't have children" WTH does that have to do with my 5 Christmas trees. I just looked at her like she had 2 heads and said "If I want I can count DH and of course my dog as children if I need to". I then just walked away. She left right away. DH looked at me and wanted to know what she said. When I told him he wanted to know what having kids had to do with having Christmas trees. Exactly.  So now my childfree friends we find yet another thing we shouldn't do.   I think it might be ok to have one tree though.


----------



## 40thbdaytrip

Just enjoyed browsing thru most of these posts.
Thought I'd add something I didn't see (but may have missed it?)

Hubby & I have been married 13 years - no kids by choice!   

What we were finding difficult was only knowing couples with children. It was just getting to be a pain to have a social life with our friends that we'd known for years. As now get togethers were all about their kids. Even on rare occasions when we did have an adult only outting, they just talked about their kids. - Okay I get that is their lives, but not ours!

So time to find friends who shared our ChildFREE views - but where? Well thanks to the internet we stumbled across a group called NoKidding. There are "chapters" worldwide & several in most States/Provinces. ( nokidding.net )

We've been enjoying our group for over a year now & its totally transformed our lives. Within the group, we've become great friends with 6 other couples in our city. Now we have a very active social life. As people without kids are always available to do stuff. No, "I can't find a baby-sitter"!   

I think its important to have some like minded friends, it makes us feel like we aren't alone or "freaks" in chosing not to procreate. We are all around the same age 35-42. Plus people without kids usually have animals, so we all enjoy conversations about our kitties & doggies.   

Just thought I'd let people know there are groups to meet other ChildFREE people. So find one in your area - or start one!  We were pretty hesitant to meet a bunch of strangers in the beginning, but are so glad we gave it a try. 

There are also lots of great links about choosing not to have children on that nokidding website.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

40thbdaytrip said:
			
		

> Just enjoyed browsing thru most of these posts.
> Thought I'd add something I didn't see (but may have missed it?)
> 
> Hubby & I have been married 13 years - no kids by choice!
> 
> What we were finding difficult was only knowing couples with children. It was just getting to be a pain to have a social life with our friends that we'd known for years. As now get togethers were all about their kids. Even on rare occasions when we did have an adult only outting, they just talked about their kids. - Okay I get that is their lives, but not ours!
> 
> So time to find friends who shared our ChildFREE views - but where? Well thanks to the internet we stumbled across a group called NoKidding. There are "chapters" worldwide & several in most States/Provinces. ( nokidding.net )
> 
> We've been enjoying our group for over a year now & its totally transformed our lives. Within the group, we've become great friends with 6 other couples in our city. Now we have a very active social life. As people without kids are always available to do stuff. No, "I can't find a baby-sitter"!
> 
> I think its important to have some like minded friends, it makes us feel like we aren't alone or "freaks" in chosing not to procreate. We are all around the same age 35-42. Plus people without kids usually have animals, so we all enjoy conversations about our kitties & doggies.
> 
> Just thought I'd let people know there are groups to meet other ChildFREE people. So find one in your area - or start one!  We were pretty hesitant to meet a bunch of strangers in the beginning, but are so glad we gave it a try.
> 
> There are also lots of great links about choosing not to have children on that nokidding website.


Hello and Welcome!!  Thank you for sharing your story and thank you for sharing your experience with nokidding.

I found the nokidding website before and was very interested in possibly attending/joining a group but alas, they don't have any chapters in my state.   Now, we're preparing to move and lo and behold they don't have any groups in that state either!   And, while I see that by the states without any established chapters it says, "maybe they're waiting on you?" I'm nervous enough about attending a meeting let alone starting one. 

I myself could have wrote this post.  It is honestly to the point where DH and I know noone w/out children.  My last childfree girlfriend just informed me that she is pregnant for the first time at 37.   So, now I truly do not have any pals w/out kids.  

I know exactly what you mean when, even without the kids, the topics of conversation always somehow revolve around their kids.  You're right, I get that is their lives as well but sometimes it would be nice if they got, it's not mine.  I one time offended a friend I used to have in particular who took it personally when I said I'd like to find someone to pal around with without kids. Like I was the anti-future or worse anti-church for suggesting a get together that didn't involve children or any mention thereof. Sometimes it's just nice to talk about the new way you've rearranged the furniture or whatever without having the inevitable pressure that eventually the conversation will somehow end up revolving around their kids and how their lives revolve around their kids and how their furniture arrangements revolve around their kids... and well you get the picture.  

I'm right at the age where everyone I know seems to be in the throws of their babymaking years.  Now it seems all of my friends either have young kids, are pregnant or are *desperately* trying to become pregnant  (again!!  Because apparently the kid they've been blessed with isn't enough?)!!  And when I say desperately I mean no life outside of temperature taking, charting, changing diets, taking supplements and praying!

A group like the one you described, nokidding, sounds like it would be divine, a welcome reprive!

Anyway, thanks for sharing and once again, welcome.


----------



## 40thbdaytrip

Thanks for the welcome!
I think its harder on us gals. When a group of guys get together they chat about sports, building a deck, computer games, how fast that car can go, etc. I don't think kids even really come up in conversations among guys? 

But when I get together with my 5 girlfriends - all with kids, obviously they all have breast feeding, potty training, soccer, school issues etc. all to chat about. So I might as well be non-exsistant. And there seems to be no escape, as its your friends, co-workers and family. Who are ALL non-stop with the kid chatter. So I really NEEDED to find other friends who were like me!

Please Moms I'm not against you!! Please don't bash me! (if it matters I'm Catholic too). Anyone without kids doesn't mean they don't adore their neices & nephews. Or truly enjoy their friends kids. And even though we don't have kids, doesn't mean we don't want to be friends anymore! My best friend since I was 5 is still my best friend, and she has 3 children. All of which, call me Aunt & I love it!!

I'm just saying its ALSO nice to have friends who share a "no children and life is great" view.  

One of my friends who belongs to a Mommy & Me group recently went away with some of the gals fom the group for a weekend without the kids & she was so looking forward to it.  But even she said when she got back, how disappointed she was because ALL they talked about was their kids! She tells me all the time she envies the conversations I have with my childfree friends. So I guess some Moms would appreciate a little escape every now & then too.


----------



## Hixski

I have the same problem. Not too bad now that I am in my mid forties. Most folks kids are older or out of the house. They have more to talk about since breastfeeding and potty training are long gone. I am lucky to have several friends that don't have children that I can relate to. We do have one set of good friends though that have a 2yr and a 5yr old. The kids are great and the parents like to talk about other things with us because we don't have kids. They get to talk about adult stuff with us.


----------



## zima-cheryl

ForTheLoveofDisney said:
			
		

> Some people will tell you that when you're old and gray, if you don't have kids who will take care of you?  Who will come visit you in the nursing home? Those Disney vacations and Plasma t.v's won't give you love when you're old.




I realize I'm backtracking...but I have to say, April this is a good point!  Having kids is not any gaurantee.  The other day I saw a story on the news that was so sad - the woman had lost her only son in an accident.  He was young & unmarried, no kids.  So here she is single and on her own in her later years.  

The fact is you have to make the right choice for you, because there are no promises (not event he promise that we all get to grow old).  

I guess I'm really blessed because once my brother had my nephew my Mom could have cared less if the rest of us had/didn't have kids.  We have a No Kidding chapter in the area, and many of our friends & even a couple of my co-workers are also kid free.  So I really don't hear about it very much -- except the occassional, envious...Didn't you just get back from vacation?  How can you be going again?


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:
			
		

> AHHHHH, Hello? Yes. I am waiting for my tag..........
> 
> I feel like an outcast, all of these posts, and never been tagged.........




 Just noticed on the freebie boards that the tag fairy has paid you a visit. Congrats!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:
			
		

> Just noticed on the freebie boards that the tag fairy has paid you a visit. Congrats!



Thanks!

I had a lot of people harrassing the poor little tag fairy for me to get a tag!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:
			
		

> Thanks!
> 
> I had a lot of people harrassing the poor little tag fairy for me to get a tag!




oooooo you have connections!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:
			
		

> oooooo you have connections!



yes- connections I *never* knew I had---

I tell all the wenches on the Capt Jack Sparrow thread that I think it was Mr Depp- he was tired of hearing me complain about it!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:
			
		

> yes- connections I *never* knew I had---
> 
> I tell all the wenches on the Capt Jack Sparrow thread that I think it was Mr Depp- he was tired of hearing me complain about it!



Congrats on your tag!!! I was wondering if the tag fairy had a thing against Mr. Depp?? Maybe the tag fairy has a thing for Orlando instead!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:
			
		

> Congrats on your tag!!! I was wondering if the tag fairy had a thing against Mr. Depp?? Maybe the tag fairy has a thing for Orlando instead!!!



One of the girls on the freebie thread was convinced the tag fairy was a postal worker- since I post so many freebies- the postal workers all over have to break their backs carrying all the extra freebies.... and it was MY fault!!


----------



## mariolatry

I've browsed this thread but I'm too lazy to go through all 20+ pages of it. A few thoughts:

To whomever said that no sane person could resent their child, I say only an insane person could go through childrearing with no moments of resentment.  I have DD14 months and it is darn hard work.  It gets awfully tiring to give of yourself 24 hours a day and always come in last place when it comes to nurturing.  Whenever I hear someone vacillating on whether or not to have kids, I try to paint them a really honest picture of what having kids is like.  

Having children is no guarantee of support in old age.  When I worked in health care, I routinely had elderly patients whose children were too self-involved, too busy, too far away, or too whatever to take care of them.  And would you really want to guilt your kids out of their enjoyment to come take care of you?

Also, some good responses I've heard to rude questions:
"Why don't you have any kids?"
"Because we enjoy money, sex, and free time and kids are incompatible with those."

"Is there something wrong with you?"
"No, but wouldn't this be awkward if there was?"


----------



## Muushka

Actually I have heard people tell me that they resent their children.  But usually they are people that I know very well and that feel safe enough to admit their true feelings.  Good for you mariolatry to be honest with people.

And I love your ideas for smart answers to the 'gonna have kids' question.
At my age, no one asks it any more though   .


----------



## Barthy73

First of all, this has been a wonderful forum!  I found these boards by searching for "Disney for Adults."  As a man, I don't get nearly the questions about not wanting children, but my wife deals with it regularly.

When my wife and I got married (5 years ago tomorrow, anniversary trip to WDW next week!!!), we both definitely wanted children.  About two years later, my wife was in tears one night and said, "What would you say if I told you I didn't want children?"  I responded, "I'm actually quite relieved because I've been trying to tell you the same darned thing." 

After this conversation, we had many others regarding whether or not we wanted children.  We felt selfish in a way because most of our reasons were relating to our freedom and desire to keep our money for ourselves.  Neither my wife nor I come from any money, and since we'd both started decent jobs and had some flexibility to travel and do things we never were able to do before, children didn't fit.

My wife was especially scared to tell her mom, but her mom replied, "If that's your decision, it's probably best you at least made it (the decision) before you made a mistake."  

My mom said to us several months after we'd made our decision, "You aren't going to have children, are you?"  I responded, "Well, it's funny that you mention it, because no, we're not."  My mom was also supportive and said if we didn't want children then we shouldn't have them.   

Both of us were surprised by our parents' responses, but they've always been supportive.  

Because we're sure the decision is final, I made an appointment to get snipped.  The first thing the Doc asked was, "How many kids do you have?"  Of anyone, he probably had the right to ask.  I looked him straight in the eye and told him none and that I wanted to keep it that way.  I explained the conversations from above, and he knew I wasn't making the decision hastily.  About 2 hours later, I was fixed, and my wife and I are both enjoying our childfree lifestyle! 

We both love kids, but we love sending them home even more.  When we're in a restaurant with children screaming, we laugh at each other and say "Thank you, Dr. Rice!"

I don't get a lot of questions about not wanting children but usually get told "You'll change your mind" when I do respond that kids aren't for me (us).

When either my wife or I are asked, we usually respond, "Don't have kids and don't want them.  We love kids but love sending them home.  My dog doesn't want to go to college and won't ever come home late or get knocked up."  We sometimes add "my dog only talks back when we want her to" or other humorous comments.  People might think we're joking, but the joke's on them!!  

Thanks to everyone who's commented on this topic and others on this board.  As a 33 year old guy, I was a bit hesitant going to WDW because I've never been there before and always thought of it as a kids place.  My wife has been, but she was a child when last there.  We've actually got 2 trips to WDW planned--one next week for our 5th anniversary and one with both of our parents in February that we're paying for.  

Thanks again!!
John


----------



## Muushka

Hi John.  Welcome!  I think you will be surprised how many childless adults you will see at WDW.  Us included (thank God)!  Thank you for a man's perspective, interesting.

See you at the world!


----------



## kennancat

Hi all - saw this article in another childfree site and thought it was interesting, whether you're a parent or childfree: State of our Unions: Life Without Children


----------



## kennancat

Bumped because we've fallen to the second page and that's just not right 

How's CF life going for everyone? We went to Food & Wine a couple of weeks ago with some friends and their kids. They still don't seem to believe us that we're not ready/may not ever be ready for kids. Oh well - I figure if we still haven't had kids 10 years from now, they might believe us then!


----------



## Hixski

kennancat said:
			
		

> Bumped because we've fallen to the second page and that's just not right
> 
> How's CF life going for everyone? We went to Food & Wine a couple of weeks ago with some friends and their kids. They still don't seem to believe us that we're not ready/may not ever be ready for kids. Oh well - I figure if we still haven't had kids 10 years from now, they might believe us then!



People have given up on us finally.  I guess the fact that I am 46 is a clue that it just isn't going to happen. DH and I are going out for a romantic dinner Saturday night. My birthday is Saturday and his is Wednesday. Great, now I will be 47. Or 29 for the 18th time. I think I will just be 29 again.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Hixski said:
			
		

> People have given up on us finally.  I guess the fact that I am 46 is a clue that it just isn't going to happen. DH and I are going out for a romantic dinner Saturday night. My birthday is Saturday and his is Wednesday. Great, now I will be 47. Or 29 for the 18th time. I think I will just be 29 again.



Happy birthday to both of you! Yup, I'm 50 and DH is 52--we're past the "you'll change your mind" point.   

Tomorrow DH and I will be kayaking two local rivers with a group of paddlers--looking forward to getting out in the sun (high of 74 degrees tomorrow) with a congenial group of river rats.   

What's everybody else doing this weekend?


----------



## blue_eyes5212

I've read about the first 10 pages of this thread and decided to go ahead and post. This topic has been on my mind quite a bit lately. Me and my DH are both 26 and have been married for 2 1/2 years. We don't have any kids but plan to in the future. Since just about everyone I know has at least one kid, I keep thinking, "Why am I not ready yet?" Reading what I have read on this thread has made me feel like I have plenty of time.....and if we decided not to that would be ok also! Our parents don't pressure us. I know they would be very good grandparents, but they also realize that it is OUR decision. 

We kept our 5 year old neice last night and I had to take a nap today to recover. She is a wonderful child who I love but she is a typical 5 year old who LOVES to talk and stay up as long as you will let her!!

Having kids is totally a personal decision for each one of us (and our SO's) but something that totally ticks me off is something that my co-worker keeps saying to me. She had her first child at 17, has had 3 children all together and now 2 are out of high school, one is still in high school. She has the nerve to make the comment "You don't want to wait until you are old to have kids, because older parents act weird"   I don't know what she means by that, but it is really none of her business. 

Seems like I discovered this thread at a time in my life when I really need it!

~Amanda~


----------



## kennancat

blue_eyes5212 said:
			
		

> She had her first child at 17, has had 3 children all together and now 2 are out of high school, one is still in high school. She has the nerve to make the comment "You don't want to wait until you are old to have kids, because older parents act weird"



Weird? Is that code for responsible and mature? Okay, you're a better person than I am - I probably would have made a snotty comeback about people who have kids at the age of 17 and regretted saying it later!  Frankly, other than being about to lose fertility or preserving royal lineage, I can't think of any rational reasons to have children at that age.

If she brings it up again, you could point out that people are marrying and having children later these days then when she was young (and make sure to use the phrase "when you were young" if you can  ). And pull out a copy of Freakonomics - there's a whole chapter in there that talks about how using Baby Einstein and all that other stuff really has no impact on how well your children do in school, but being over 30 when they're born does have a positive impact. Good luck!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

blue_eyes5212 said:
			
		

> I've read about the first 10 pages of this thread and decided to go ahead and post. This topic has been on my mind quite a bit lately. Me and my DH are both 26 and have been married for 2 1/2 years. We don't have any kids but plan to in the future. Since just about everyone I know has at least one kid, I keep thinking, "Why am I not ready yet?" Reading what I have read on this thread has made me feel like I have plenty of time.....and if we decided not to that would be ok also! Our parents don't pressure us. I know they would be very good grandparents, but they also realize that it is OUR decision.
> 
> We kept our 5 year old neice last night and I had to take a nap today to recover. She is a wonderful child who I love but she is a typical 5 year old who LOVES to talk and stay up as long as you will let her!!
> 
> Having kids is totally a personal decision for each one of us (and our SO's) but something that totally ticks me off is something that my co-worker keeps saying to me. She had her first child at 17, has had 3 children all together and now 2 are out of high school, one is still in high school. She has the nerve to make the comment "You don't want to wait until you are old to have kids, because older parents act weird"   I don't know what she means by that, but it is really none of her business.
> 
> Seems like I discovered this thread at a time in my life when I really need it!
> 
> ~Amanda~



Congratulations! You managed to not say anything declasse in response to that coworker, which is more than I would have done. I give you a lot of credit for not taking the easy way out and responding with a harsh comment.


----------



## blue_eyes5212

LuluLovesDisney said:
			
		

> Congratulations! You managed to not say anything declasse in response to that coworker, which is more than I would have done. I give you a lot of credit for not taking the easy way out and responding with a harsh comment.



I'm generally the peacekeeper and hate confrontation, so there are a lot of things I wish I would/could say. Me and My DH are going to do what is right for us.....and that is just the way it is!


----------



## blue_eyes5212

kennancat said:
			
		

> Weird? Is that code for responsible and mature? Okay, you're a better person than I am - I probably would have made a snotty comeback about people who have kids at the age of 17 and regretted saying it later!  Frankly, other than being about to lose fertility or preserving royal lineage, I can't think of any rational reasons to have children at that age.
> 
> If she brings it up again, you could point out that people are marrying and having children later these days then when she was young (and make sure to use the phrase "when you were young" if you can  ). And pull out a copy of Freakonomics - there's a whole chapter in there that talks about how using Baby Einstein and all that other stuff really has no impact on how well your children do in school, but being over 30 when they're born does have a positive impact. Good luck!



Thanks! I think she is just mad because her sister, "the favorite", waited to have her children and she is jealous of all that she was able to do. But we are going to do what is right for us! Thankfully I have recently taken another position which moves me away from this particular co-worker!


----------



## phinz

I'm way late on this conversation, but the statement I've found shuts people up really quickly when they ask, "Do you have kids?" is "No." Upon the "Why" question, I respond "We can't."

They have no idea that I had myself fixed several years ago, so when they ask they get an answer that makes them uncomfortable and changes the subject quickly. I love watching their deflated reaction when they realize there's no really good way to respond without being presumptuous, rude (as if the initial question isn't rude already) or nosey.


----------



## Forevryoung

Currently, I'm only 22, if I stay with my boyfriend, we will not be having any children together. He is 19 years older than I am and has a son who is 18, from marriage #1 (I would be wife #3). He does not like children and is glad that his responsibility for his son is nearly over.   (either that or he can't wait to sever contact with ex #1   )

If I wanted children (which I didn't even before I met my BF), I would have to break up with my boyfriend. People (especially family) think that we shouldn't be together to begin with and bring up the child issue frequently.

I am also selfish yet my future job will be working with children/adults with severe special needs. Additionally, I have bipolar disorder which has never been completely controlled. I would need someone to help me take care of a child when I can't.

People are rude when dealing with childfree couples and couples who are untraditional (like mine)- anything out of the norm seems to require a few stares and comments.


----------



## Egg Power Plant

I commend all of you on staying with your choice and not comforming to the standards of society.  Some people do not want children and that is absolutely fine.  You can have a very happy life without them.


----------



## JCandKT

Hi all,
I'm new to the boards - hello hello - and this one of the first threads I've read.  My husband and I celebrated our fifth anniversary (8 total together) this year and we will be going to WDW on New Years Eve for a week.  This will be our fourth time together.  People look at us so strangely when we tell them we're going ... "but... but you don't have kids!"

Then inevitably we get the "when are you going to have kids" question.

We just don't know if we want kids, honestly.  Maybe that'll change, but right now, we're just not ready for them.  We both work plus-full time and we are both enrolled in university.  We don't have enough time to give proper love to our hamsters...so how could we love a child the way it needs?

Of course, there are days where I think I'd be a good mom, but I'm just scared to death, and people think it's so strange that we haven't jumped on the kid bandwagon just yet... I mean, I'm only 27 (we got married young), so what's the rush??

ANYWAYS - we're really looking foreward to our trip on NYE.  We definitely need the vacation... and where is a better place to relax??!


----------



## maddhatir

JCandKT said:
			
		

> Hi all,
> I'm new to the boards - hello hello - and this one of the first threads I've read.  My husband and I celebrated our fifth anniversary (8 total together) this year and we will be going to WDW on New Years Eve for a week.  This will be our fourth time together.  People look at us so strangely when we tell them we're going ... "but... but you don't have kids!"
> 
> Then inevitably we get the "when are you going to have kids" question.
> 
> We just don't know if we want kids, honestly.  Maybe that'll change, but right now, we're just not ready for them.  We both work plus-full time and we are both enrolled in university.  We don't have enough time to give proper love to our hamsters...so how could we love a child the way it needs?
> 
> Of course, there are days where I think I'd be a good mom, but I'm just scared to death, and people think it's so strange that we haven't jumped on the kid bandwagon just yet... I mean, I'm only 27 (we got married young), so what's the rush??
> 
> ANYWAYS - we're really looking foreward to our trip on NYE.  We definitely need the vacation... and where is a better place to relax??!



Welcome!!!!!!

This is just advice from me.........

There is NO need to go to the "dark side"! All of us DINKS on this side have much more fun!!!!   

Its funner in DISNEY w/o kids intow anyway!  

 just keep saying "I'm free! I'm free!- for the love of god I AM.....FREE!"


----------



## plgrn

Welcome aboard! Been married 4 years and am a university student so we're kinda in the same boat. If the "urge" to have kids ever comes, I guess I would go with it, but it hasn't so far so maybe it will stay away!   Glad to have you!


----------



## Mischa

JCandKT said:
			
		

> Hi all,
> I'm new to the boards - hello hello - and this one of the first threads I've read.  My husband and I celebrated our fifth anniversary (8 total together) this year and we will be going to WDW on New Years Eve for a week.  This will be our fourth time together.  People look at us so strangely when we tell them we're going ... "but... but you don't have kids!"
> 
> Then inevitably we get the "when are you going to have kids" question.
> 
> We just don't know if we want kids, honestly.  Maybe that'll change, but right now, we're just not ready for them.  We both work plus-full time and we are both enrolled in university.  We don't have enough time to give proper love to our hamsters...so how could we love a child the way it needs?
> 
> Of course, there are days where I think I'd be a good mom, but I'm just scared to death, and people think it's so strange that we haven't jumped on the kid bandwagon just yet... I mean, I'm only 27 (we got married young), so what's the rush??
> 
> ANYWAYS - we're really looking foreward to our trip on NYE.  We definitely need the vacation... and where is a better place to relax??!



Welcome and congrats on your 5th anniversary.  My dh & I celebrated our 15th this year and we went to WDW.  It was dh's first trip and boy is he hooked now!     (Lucky me!)  We're also child-free (not by choice, but after 12+ years of trying we've finally given up and have decided to embrace the "child-free/childless" life.  We just put my dad in an assisted living place (he'd been living with us for a very loooooooooong 2 1/2 years), so now we feel like "newlyweds" again!    

We're planning our next trip for next week.  We can't wait!

Again - welcome!


----------



## taterbaby

Don't worry honey -you have plenty of time-whether you do or whether you don't -it is such a personal decision!!!  I was 31 when my first child was born and 33 when my second was born.  My husband and I thought our little family was complete-when lo and behold at 35  found myself having the third!!!!  (heheh-even after having surgery to prevent it).  I think that I am a better parent for waiting until I was older-but that is just me.  Don't let anyone upset you-I got things like "don't you know what causes that" and "is this the last one"!    Go ahead-have fun-enjoy your husband and your life together.  I love my children greatly and cannot imagine my life without them but am very proud that I waited until I had time with my husband.


----------



## kennancat

taterbaby said:
			
		

> Don't let anyone upset you-I got things like "don't you know what causes that" and "is this the last one"!


This is what I find so funny - have no kids, one kids, two kids, three kids, etc. and someone somewhere will find a way to criticize it!


----------



## Hixski

I have heard that some people think if you don't have kids that is Gods way of telling you that you would not have made a good parent. Someone told me they overheard this conversation. Some people really should not let what they think come out of their mouths. At least no one has said this to me personally.


----------



## aclov

DH and I have no children, we have been trying for years.   We constantly get interrogated all the time as to why we don't have children.   I think people are ignorant and insensitive, like it's so easy.   And if it is a decision by choice than why would we have to provide a explanation to anyone    I have a friend who I cringe talking to sometimes because she's a SAHM of 3 lovely children and a perfect life according to her and I'm happy for her but I feel like she pounces on me whenever she can by constantly bringing up the subject.  Just today, she questioned me if I was doing anything about conceiving.   It's strange that sometimes I can tell a complete stranger about my infertility problems but I don't feel comfortable telling a friend of 18 years.   I think it's just the way she makes me feel, I don't think I'm being defensive and I do try to explain some of my feelings to her but I just feel like she's being intrusive instead of caring.  I just don't understand why other people seem to feel like they have to dwell on something that doesn't concern them.   I've worked with people or know people with no children and I have never asked them personal questions like that.   I once had a coworker yell across the hall to me "why don't you have any kids, you can't have any?" I felt like I wanted the ground to swallow me.   Or when we were at a friend's wedding eating dinner and a guy we don't know that well, told my DH that "he was shooting blanks".  I had another coworker tell me she feels sorry for people with no children.  Why? I mean what is wrong with people???


----------



## Hixski

aclov said:
			
		

> DH and I have no children, we have been trying for years.   We constantly get interrogated all the time as to why we don't have children.   I think people are ignorant and insensitive, like it's so easy.   And if it is a decision by choice than why would we have to provide a explanation to anyone    I have a friend who I cringe talking to sometimes because she's a SAHM of 3 lovely children and a perfect life according to her and I'm happy for her but I feel like she pounces on me whenever she can by constantly bringing up the subject.  Just today, she questioned me if I was doing anything about conceiving.   It's strange that sometimes I can tell a complete stranger about my infertility problems but I don't feel comfortable telling a friend of 18 years.   I think it's just the way she makes me feel, I don't think I'm being defensive and I do try to explain some of my feelings to her but I just feel like she's being intrusive instead of caring.  I just don't understand why other people seem to feel like they have to dwell on something that doesn't concern them.   I've worked with people or know people with no children and I have never asked them personal questions like that.   I once had a coworker yell across the hall to me "why don't you have any kids, you can't have any?" I felt like I wanted the ground to swallow me.   Or when we were at a friend's wedding eating dinner and a guy we don't know that well, told my DH that "he was shooting blanks".  I had another coworker tell me she feels sorry for people with no children.  Why? I mean what is wrong with people???



I went through all that. We tried and it didn't work. We tried for several years.  We just decided it was not working and that is it. We were not going to do the everything you can route to have a child. I had a friend that was like yours and frankly I got to the point where I just wanted to tell her "Shut the hell up". I don't know how old you are but I am 47. Thankfully most folks don't say anything now. DH and I don't know why we didn't have kids. That is why we are ok now. We can't point the finger and say it was your fault. It just didn't happen. Oh, well we will now get on with our childfree life. And we have been for the last 10 years. I guess I have on a bulletproof child vest now. Say what you want it does not bother my anymore.


----------



## HappyLawyer

Krissalee said:
			
		

> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!



I love my dtr with every ounce of my being, i would give my life for her, heck in two years she may get a sibling, with that being said, if i had life to do all over again, i would do things differently. 

My mom says if she did it over she would not have children, it does not mean she does not love us, but it can be difficult being a parent.
You made the best choice for you, and basically to hell with what others think.


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:
			
		

> I have heard that some people think if you don't have kids that is Gods way of telling you that you would not have made a good parent. Someone told me they overheard this conversation. Some people really should not let what they think come out of their mouths. At least no one has said this to me personally.


I remember reading someone's story like this - she was unexpectedly pregnant and placing the child up for adoption and a "friend" of hers told her that she would go to hell if she did because God prevents people from having children because they would be bad parents or abuse the kid or something like that. I think it was on etiquette hell. Needless to say, she no longer speaks to that person. I could believe that God has other plans for people who try to have children and can't, but I don't buy the "they would make bad parents" theory. After all, if that were true wouldn't Hitler's parents have been infertile?

ETA: Found it. Luckily, the site now has a search feature.


> I got pregnant at a time in my life when having a child would be less than ideal, and decided to give the child up for adoption. My boyfriend and I had decided to keep the pregnancy as much of a secret as possible, since neither one of us wanted to deal with the backlash of his family for "abandoning" the child, regardless of the fact that we were barely able to make ends meet for just the two of us, and neither one of us is really ready to be a parent.
> 
> I told a few very close friends what we were going through, since I was very emotionally fragile and wanted a few shoulders to lean on. I explain to one friend, "Bob", about how we were having an Open Adoption, and my boyfriend and I had picked a couple that had been trying to have a child for years, and had been on the waiting list for adoption for almost three years. They were of the same faith as my boyfriend, something he felt was very important.
> 
> Bob's response: "Oh, some people just don't deserve to have children. That's why God doesn't let them have kids, you know. If you give your kid to them, you'll go to hell, and the kid will grow up abused."
> 
> I don't talk to Bob anymore.


----------



## 3DisneyKids

OMG, that is the most foul thing I have ever heard!  To assume that people can't have children as a punishment from God?!?!  That is truly awful.

Just browsing through this thread b/c this is something we discuss often.  We love our 3 children, and we wanted them and I love being a mom.  I was born to do this.  However, we often see people who are having kids because "that's what you're supposed to do."  It makes my blood boil.

To those on this thread who have had the courage to say "it's not for me," I applaud you!  I wish that being married and without children was more of an acceptable choice...one that should never be questioned!


----------



## rayne75

People really need to mind their business when it comes to that.  I'm a single mom and I adore my princess but speaking from experience the questions don't stop even if you have one!! I mean your not even out of the hospital and they're asking you "When are you having the next one?"  Next time they ask just smile and say "What? They're right here with me. Can't you see 'em?"


----------



## bdtracey

DW and I have been married for 2 1/2 years and don't have any kids.  I know her parents would love for us to have kids but I'm just not 100% sure if I want kids.  Sometimes I do....sometimes I don't.  Is this normal or am I supposed to wait for some unknown desire to kick in?

I know that DW wants kids but I'm just really happy that it's only the 2 of us right now.  Sometimes people seem so unhappy that they've got kids.  I think someday I want to have kids but how in the world do you know when you're going to be ready????  I was thinking that I want to have kids sooner rather than later because I don't want to be close to retirement and have kids going off to university.  I think I've always planned on having kids but now I'm just so happy that it's only DW and I that I'm not really sure.  Does this make sense to you guys?


----------



## Hixski

bdtracey said:
			
		

> DW and I have been married for 2 1/2 years and don't have any kids.  I know her parents would love for us to have kids but I'm just not 100% sure if I want kids.  Sometimes I do....sometimes I don't.  Is this normal or am I supposed to wait for some unknown desire to kick in?
> 
> I know that DW wants kids but I'm just really happy that it's only the 2 of us right now.  Sometimes people seem so unhappy that they've got kids.  I think someday I want to have kids but how in the world do you know when you're going to be ready????  I was thinking that I want to have kids sooner rather than later because I don't want to be close to retirement and have kids going off to university.  I think I've always planned on having kids but now I'm just so happy that it's only DW and I that I'm not really sure.  Does this make sense to you guys?



You are what we call a fencesitter. You are not alone in that. If you read through this thread you will find alot of folks are thinking the same way you are. Just be very sure of what you want before you do anything. Some fencesitting people have been very happy after having a child. Some would not give up their child for anything but now wish they would have thought more about it. Others decide that no they really do not want a child. Only you and your spouse can decide.


----------



## bdtracey

Thanks for the advice!  You know what's actually kind of funny?  I thought that going to WDW would make me want to have kids but after seeing some of those monsters made me think otherwise.  But that is mainly the parents I think.  I guess I'll just have to do some soul searching is all!

Thanks again!


----------



## Hixski

bdtracey said:
			
		

> Thanks for the advice!  You know what's actually kind of funny?  I thought that going to WDW would make me want to have kids but after seeing some of those monsters made me think otherwise.  But that is mainly the parents I think.  I guess I'll just have to do some soul searching is all!
> 
> Thanks again!



I am probably your parents age so you know we give good advice.  We go to WDW in September just because most of the kids are back in school and it's not crowded. There were still a few times DH and I looked at each other and thought. "Gee...it really isn't so bad not having kids" (We were fencesitters that it did not work out for so we are now happily childfree). The only other advice I can give is to make sure you and DW are on the same page at the same time.


----------



## kennancat

bdtracey said:
			
		

> I think I've always planned on having kids but now I'm just so happy that it's only DW and I that I'm not really sure.  Does this make sense to you guys?


Growing up, I always assumed I would have kids. Then I met DH and he didn't want kids and it was the first time I think I really realized that it was a choice. We're still not sure - I go back and forth between "maybe in 4-5 years it wouldn't be so bad" and "hell no"  Make sure you discuss your feelings with your DW too; you may find that she's as undecided as you are. After all, you've only been married 2.5 years. Most people I know waited 4 to 5 years before having kids. We've been married almost 5 years and we're still debating. Our plan right now is to make sure that we're setting ourselves up financially regardless of which choice we make. I don't think anybody is ever 100% ready (at least no one who really understands what they're getting into  ) but I thinks it's like any other choice you make in life - if you make it, you need to commit and go for it.


----------



## plgrn

Just back from WDW and the Wonder and boy do I have some rants and raves about &$*%^ kids! Or should I say the &*%# parents!! I'll have to get a list up of all the incidents (yes, there are that many) and post them here where they will be appreciated.


----------



## almburr

there is nothing wrong with not wanting to have children.  It does not make you evil.  I am married and have five children, But that is what i wanted.  I dont think people who dont want children are wrong it is thier life.  I have a wonderful aunt and uncle who live in Orlando.  They never had kids no one asked if they wanted any or couldnt have any.  They travel, do what they like.  Oh sure there are days when i think why did i have kids. But that is just the way it is.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Just back from WDW and the Wonder and boy do I have some rants and raves about &$*%^ kids! Or should I say the &*%# parents!! I'll have to get a list up of all the incidents (yes, there are that many) and post them here where they will be appreciated.



So wheres the list!!!!  hee hee


----------



## Tasmen

I've been married for 5 years now (together 7) and we have no kids.  When people ask my mom when we are going to have kids or if her daughter has children, she tells them simply:  'They have cats'.  We get no real pressure to 'spawn' from relatives or friends, so I guess we are lucky that way.  For me it's a medical issue in that I have a congenital heart defect (it's been fixed, but could 'unfix' itself during pregnancy).  

Anyway, the next time someone asks you if you have kids, just say, "I have cats" or "I have <insert pet type here>".  It tends to keep people quiet as it is not quite the answer they were expecting.


----------



## Tasmen

Eeep..double post batman!


----------



## plgrn

Thanks for reminding me! Most of these are the parents fault (or would it be appropriate to call them breeders in this case??) 

Scene #1 - The monorail. A Little Alice in Wonderland about 7 years old was laying all the way across the bench taking up 3 seats while elderly adults STOOD. This was in the middle of the day, not late at night. She was not sleeping. Just laying there because it was comfortable. FINALLY her mothers ASKS her if she WANTS to sit up so others can sit too. She agrees after a few moments of deciding if that's acceptable.

Scene #2 - The Jingle Jungle Parade. An elderly lady had a vantage point right across the parade route from us right by the ropes and had been standing there for at least 20 minutes waiting for the parade. As soon as the first float comes into view, a breeder grabs her two year-old, shoves in front of the lady and holds the urchin up on her shoulders blocking the view not only of the poor elderly lady she shoved out of the way, but everyone else behind her too!!

Scene #3 - The bus. Late at night on the way back to the resorts from the parks the bus is packed with standing room only. After the first stop, seats became available, so I made a move to sit down next to a little girl about 11 years old. As soon as she saw me coming, she took her Stitch plush animal and set it in the seat and announced that Stitch needed a place to sit down. I grabbed Stitch, handing it back to her and announced that I needed the seat more than Stitch did. Parents are silent as the grave during this whole exchange. Where's the pair of scissors and the silver platter when you need it? Miss Priss would have gotten Stitch's HEAD handed back to her as tired as I was that night.

Scene #4 - The elevator on the Disney Wonder. We board the elevator and a  3 year old child is rolling around the floor. His mother tells him to stop and stand beside her. He continues rolling around the floor and the mother says "Ok, good job." WTH?? Good job doing what?? Disobeying?? Acting like a rabid animal??

Scene #5 - The ticketing line to get into the Magic Kingdom. A two year old is holding up the entire line while Mommy and Daddy encourage his to put his ticket in the machine and put his finger on the slot "all by himself" praising and encouraging him the whole time like it's a soccer match. Now I realize that kids need to learn skills, but not at the expense of the 200 people in line behind you! What would have been so wrong with just scooping th kid up and taking care of business so the next person in line could actually see the castle sometime that day?? 

Scene #6 - Exiting Animal Kingdom. A 4 year old child on a leash (cleverly disguised as a monkey backpack, but it was definitely a leash) is dragging, pulling, and hanging by the leash because he doesn't want to leave the park. He is also screaming, yelling, and crying at his mother and grandmother who are stopping ever few steps to kneel down and "reason with him." I just thank God he was on a leash or he probably would have come over and bit somebody. Why aren't there leash laws for children? Every child under the age of 10 should be required to be on a leash or else the parents are ticketed and fined.

Scene #7 through Infinity.....Children are taking over America, and society at large is allowing it. Do you know how many times I saw children who could easily be sitting on someone's lap taking up a seat while adults stood? Do you know how many adults gave up their seats for children?? It's ridiculous! This would not be tolerated in Asian cultures. What really chaps my butt is their interaction with the elderly. Children running over them and taking their seats, places in line, and parade vantage points. That would not have been tolerated in THIS culture 40 years ago. What is happening to America!!

Ok, ny rant is officially over. I know some soccer mom is going to get on here and flame me, but I just had to get that out. This fencesitter leans a little closer to a certain side of the fence each time she visits WDW!


----------



## bdtracey

Nicely done!  Nicely done!  I saw a bunch of that on our last trip and wrote most of it off to stupid parents but if I had a sweet vantage point for a parade and some idiot mother pulled that stunt on me I'd tell her where to go and how to get there.  For the most part I'm quiet and reserved but I'd make sure that I had my vantage point.

On another note...DW and I will be having kids someday and we were both brought up fairly well (IMHO) and we have good manners (again...IMHO).  I've seen parents let their kids run rampant and I wonder if they were like DW and I before they had kids.  Did they turn off their brains after having kids or were they that dumb before?  I'm being serious here...does having kids do this to people?  If it does I surely don't want kids at all.  As it stands right now my kids will either behave or they won't be out in public.

I was spanked as a kid; no marks were left....unless you count the time that my dad split the wooden spoon on my behind and it pinched me then I proceeded to run around the house with a wooden spoon attached to my butt.  JK...this didn't happen to me but it did happen to my step brother!  Do parents not discipline their kids anymore or what's going on?  If I decide to be a strict parent NOW and can I plan on my kids behaving like normal...scrap that...above average citizens?


----------



## almburr

Wild children!!!!!!! run amuck!


----------



## almburr

As a parent i would be pissed if my kids acted like that.  Im sorry plgrn that kids act that way.  Yes that sounds to me like bad parents. I am sick of parents that think thier children are the only ones in the world and they are there for everyone to enjoy!! my kids know if mommy and daddy say no that means no or when it is time to go we go. No ifs ands or buts.  Yes parents are to encourage them along but good god, people if there is aline to get in do the ticket for them, and tell them no.  That was my kids first words "NO!" Children need to know that they do not rule the world, they need to be put down a notch.  Im sorry to rant but, good grief! I am so sick of parents giving everything to thier kids that they want, kids think that they deserve it, they dont.  By the way i am not a soccer mom I would not want to be a soccer mom if my life depended on it( i know how to use 4wheel drive on my suburban, not SUV!)just am mom who is trying to raise the kds right.  So it is not just non parents that cant stand to see wild children running around.  I think i might get flamed now!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Thanks for reminding me! Most of these are the parents fault (or would it be appropriate to call them breeders in this case??)
> 
> Scene #1 - The monorail. A Little Alice in Wonderland about 7 years old was laying all the way across the bench taking up 3 seats while elderly adults STOOD. This was in the middle of the day, not late at night. She was not sleeping. Just laying there because it was comfortable. FINALLY her mothers ASKS her if she WANTS to sit up so others can sit too. She agrees after a few moments of deciding if that's acceptable.
> 
> Scene #2 - The Jingle Jungle Parade. An elderly lady had a vantage point right across the parade route from us right by the ropes and had been standing there for at least 20 minutes waiting for the parade. As soon as the first float comes into view, a breeder grabs her two year-old, shoves in front of the lady and holds the urchin up on her shoulders blocking the view not only of the poor elderly lady she shoved out of the way, but everyone else behind her too!!
> 
> Scene #3 - The bus. Late at night on the way back to the resorts from the parks the bus is packed with standing room only. After the first stop, seats became available, so I made a move to sit down next to a little girl about 11 years old. As soon as she saw me coming, she took her Stitch plush animal and set it in the seat and announced that Stitch needed a place to sit down. I grabbed Stitch, handing it back to her and announced that I needed the seat more than Stitch did. Parents are silent as the grave during this whole exchange. Where's the pair of scissors and the silver platter when you need it? Miss Priss would have gotten Stitch's HEAD handed back to her as tired as I was that night.
> 
> Scene #4 - The elevator on the Disney Wonder. We board the elevator and a  3 year old child is rolling around the floor. His mother tells him to stop and stand beside her. He continues rolling around the floor and the mother says "Ok, good job." WTH?? Good job doing what?? Disobeying?? Acting like a rabid animal??
> 
> Scene #5 - The ticketing line to get into the Magic Kingdom. A two year old is holding up the entire line while Mommy and Daddy encourage his to put his ticket in the machine and put his finger on the slot "all by himself" praising and encouraging him the whole time like it's a soccer match. Now I realize that kids need to learn skills, but not at the expense of the 200 people in line behind you! What would have been so wrong with just scooping th kid up and taking care of business so the next person in line could actually see the castle sometime that day??
> 
> Scene #6 - Exiting Animal Kingdom. A 4 year old child on a leash (cleverly disguised as a monkey backpack, but it was definitely a leash) is dragging, pulling, and hanging by the leash because he doesn't want to leave the park. He is also screaming, yelling, and crying at his mother and grandmother who are stopping ever few steps to kneel down and "reason with him." I just thank God he was on a leash or he probably would have come over and bit somebody. Why aren't there leash laws for children? Every child under the age of 10 should be required to be on a leash or else the parents are ticketed and fined.
> 
> Scene #7 through Infinity.....Children are taking over America, and society at large is allowing it. Do you know how many times I saw children who could easily be sitting on someone's lap taking up a seat while adults stood? Do you know how many adults gave up their seats for children?? It's ridiculous! This would not be tolerated in Asian cultures. What really chaps my butt is their interaction with the elderly. Children running over them and taking their seats, places in line, and parade vantage points. That would not have been tolerated in THIS culture 40 years ago. What is happening to America!!
> 
> Ok, ny rant is officially over. I know some soccer mom is going to get on here and flame me, but I just had to get that out. This fencesitter leans a little closer to a certain side of the fence each time she visits WDW!



I LOVE your descriptions!!!  breeders....urchins!!! OMG! I am LMFAO!! Dismembering Stitch!! ahhh...... kids give me chest pains!

DH and I just got back from a trip with BIL, SIL and their two "urchins" ( of course as their aunt- I say that "lovingly"! )

One thing that really got me- was my 5 year old niece- we had to wait for a bus if it was standing room only b/c she would throw a hissy if she couldnt sit!  I tried to explain to her that no one else who is standing is happy about it either- so suck it up! But of course, that didnt penetrate the skull- so we had to wait for buses that had seats available-- 

OH- and when she did get on the bus with seats available- she wanted NO ONE to sit next to her- and she didnt want to sit on any of our laps-- 
YEAH- LIKE I WILL TOLERATE THAT!-- I just scooped her up and plopped her on my lap- like she would have a say in THAT! 

One day- she didnt want anyone sitting next to her, as I once again put her on my lap she quickly put down one of her tiny princess dolls on the empty seat next to us- I guess a woman didnt see it (No- really I dont think she did- it was pretty small) and I had to do a quick doll interception before she had it up her butt! ouch!

And believe me- everytime she commented on how she didnt want anyone sitting down and didnt want to be on anyones lap- I gave her the-- "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE HERE IN DISNEY! DO YOU THINK THESE PEOPLE WANT TO STAND B/C YOU WANT A SEAT TO YOURSELF!"

I dont tolorate that crap, I dont care if you are my niece or not!

Another thing was- she hated waiting in line for any rides! It was another hissy b/c she didnt want to wait- do you know what its like to play stinking "I spy" while in line for SOARIN' for 30 minutes- you can only pick out so many things to freakin' spy!- She started again on Buzz Lightyear and I finally just said- KNOCK IT OFF!  I told SIL- I bet she was doing it just to see if you would get out of line with her- that would mean she wins!--- now stay and your both getting on this stinkin ride!!!! Thank god the line was fast for that one. 

The moral of this story--- I like doing Disney better without kids!


----------



## bdtracey

Maddhatir:

I totally agree with the "enjoying disney w/o kids" part!  I tell people all the time "don't go down there expecting to want kids" and no one believes me until they get back.  A couple guys I know told me that they were going to get 'clipped' (wink, wink) after their last experience.  Of course they didn't but they said that they were really glad that they didn't have any kids!  I know I'll eventually be down there with kids so I might see it through a different light but as of now I'm really glad we're going down again without kids!


----------



## Liisa

My husband and I (happily married for 6 years) have 2 wonderful dogs - no kids for us, thank you.  I can sympathize with the entire list of bad behavior posted above as we have seen most of it for ourselves.  When we witness the absolutely deplorable behavior of children these days, we high five each other and smile that we can enjoy the quiet tranquility of our life!


----------



## Luv'sTink

plgrn said:


> Thanks for reminding me! Most of these are the parents fault (or would it be appropriate to call them breeders in this case??)
> 
> Scene #1 - The monorail. A Little Alice in Wonderland about 7 years old was laying all the way across the bench taking up 3 seats while elderly adults STOOD. This was in the middle of the day, not late at night. She was not sleeping. Just laying there because it was comfortable. FINALLY her mothers ASKS her if she WANTS to sit up so others can sit too. She agrees after a few moments of deciding if that's acceptable.
> 
> Scene #2 - The Jingle Jungle Parade. An elderly lady had a vantage point right across the parade route from us right by the ropes and had been standing there for at least 20 minutes waiting for the parade. As soon as the first float comes into view, a breeder grabs her two year-old, shoves in front of the lady and holds the urchin up on her shoulders blocking the view not only of the poor elderly lady she shoved out of the way, but everyone else behind her too!!
> 
> Scene #3 - The bus. Late at night on the way back to the resorts from the parks the bus is packed with standing room only. After the first stop, seats became available, so I made a move to sit down next to a little girl about 11 years old. As soon as she saw me coming, she took her Stitch plush animal and set it in the seat and announced that Stitch needed a place to sit down. I grabbed Stitch, handing it back to her and announced that I needed the seat more than Stitch did. Parents are silent as the grave during this whole exchange. Where's the pair of scissors and the silver platter when you need it? Miss Priss would have gotten Stitch's HEAD handed back to her as tired as I was that night.
> 
> Scene #4 - The elevator on the Disney Wonder. We board the elevator and a  3 year old child is rolling around the floor. His mother tells him to stop and stand beside her. He continues rolling around the floor and the mother says "Ok, good job." WTH?? Good job doing what?? Disobeying?? Acting like a rabid animal??
> 
> Scene #5 - The ticketing line to get into the Magic Kingdom. A two year old is holding up the entire line while Mommy and Daddy encourage his to put his ticket in the machine and put his finger on the slot "all by himself" praising and encouraging him the whole time like it's a soccer match. Now I realize that kids need to learn skills, but not at the expense of the 200 people in line behind you! What would have been so wrong with just scooping th kid up and taking care of business so the next person in line could actually see the castle sometime that day??
> 
> Scene #6 - Exiting Animal Kingdom. A 4 year old child on a leash (cleverly disguised as a monkey backpack, but it was definitely a leash) is dragging, pulling, and hanging by the leash because he doesn't want to leave the park. He is also screaming, yelling, and crying at his mother and grandmother who are stopping ever few steps to kneel down and "reason with him." I just thank God he was on a leash or he probably would have come over and bit somebody. Why aren't there leash laws for children? Every child under the age of 10 should be required to be on a leash or else the parents are ticketed and fined.
> 
> Scene #7 through Infinity.....Children are taking over America, and society at large is allowing it. Do you know how many times I saw children who could easily be sitting on someone's lap taking up a seat while adults stood? Do you know how many adults gave up their seats for children?? It's ridiculous! This would not be tolerated in Asian cultures. What really chaps my butt is their interaction with the elderly. Children running over them and taking their seats, places in line, and parade vantage points. That would not have been tolerated in THIS culture 40 years ago. What is happening to America!!
> 
> Ok, ny rant is officially over. I know some soccer mom is going to get on here and flame me, but I just had to get that out. This fencesitter leans a little closer to a certain side of the fence each time she visits WDW!






Seven incidents out of the thousands of children you must have seen, not bad!

And....I HATE soccer.


----------



## maddhatir

Luv'sTink said:


> Seven incidents out of the thousands of children you must have seen, not bad!
> 
> And....I HATE soccer.



I think she was truamatized and the 7 incidents are all she can remember- I bet if we hypnotize her- it will all come rushing back!


----------



## aclov

Tasmen said:


> I've been married for 5 years now (together 7) and we have no kids.  When people ask my mom when we are going to have kids or if her daughter has children, she tells them simply:  'They have cats'.  We get no real pressure to 'spawn' from relatives or friends, so I guess we are lucky that way.  For me it's a medical issue in that I have a congenital heart defect (it's been fixed, but could 'unfix' itself during pregnancy).
> 
> Anyway, the next time someone asks you if you have kids, just say, "I have cats" or "I have <insert pet type here>".  It tends to keep people quiet as it is not quite the answer they were expecting.



I always use this line -  "I have two dogs and their like my kids"   I ran into an old boss a couple of days ago that I hadn't seen in years, I worked for him right out of high school.   He asked me how many kids I had and I said none.   He says "Why?"  _Okay, personal question here._    I say "because I have dogs."   

I'm watching my 3 year old nephew right now, because he was sick to go to daycare, he's a handful like some of the children other posters have described.    He's parents can't even go into the bathroom without him!  He's constantly throwing a fit    Earlier he was screaming at the top of his lungs and the dogs were going crazy barking in the next room - gosh even their nervous .    I had to scold him and tell him that "auntie don't play that!  Be quiet or no more cartoon channel."     He's been behaving so far


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> I think she was truamatized and the 7 incidents are all she can remember- I bet if we hypnotize her- it will all come rushing back!




Exactly! I think after a while I just started repressing things so that I could enjoy the vacation. You do what you gotta do!


----------



## plgrn

almburr said:


> As a parent i would be pissed if my kids acted like that.  Im sorry plgrn that kids act that way.  Yes that sounds to me like bad parents. I am sick of parents that think thier children are the only ones in the world and they are there for everyone to enjoy!! my kids know if mommy and daddy say no that means no or when it is time to go we go. No ifs ands or buts.  Yes parents are to encourage them along but good god, people if there is aline to get in do the ticket for them, and tell them no.  That was my kids first words "NO!" Children need to know that they do not rule the world, they need to be put down a notch.  Im sorry to rant but, good grief! I am so sick of parents giving everything to thier kids that they want, kids think that they deserve it, they dont.  By the way i am not a soccer mom I would not want to be a soccer mom if my life depended on it( i know how to use 4wheel drive on my suburban, not SUV!)just am mom who is trying to raise the kds right.  So it is not just non parents that cant stand to see wild children running around.  I think i might get flamed now!



No flames here! Sounds like you are a PARENT. Not a BREEDER. Big difference.


----------



## plgrn

bdtracey said:


> On another note...DW and I will be having kids someday and we were both brought up fairly well (IMHO) and we have good manners (again...IMHO). . .... As it stands right now my kids will either behave or they won't be out in public.
> 
> I was spanked as a kid; no marks were left....unless you count the time that my dad split the wooden spoon on my behind and it pinched me then I proceeded to run around the house with a wooden spoon attached to my butt.  JK...this didn't happen to me but it did happen to my step brother!  Do parents not discipline their kids anymore or what's going on?  If I decide to be a strict parent NOW and can I plan on my kids behaving like normal...scrap that...above average citizens?



Same situation here and a hearty amen to that brother!! There is no question in my mind that if I have kids, they will be a joy to be around and excellent citizens because I won't tolerate anything less. If they wind up in jail, on drugs, or disrespect anyone it will be after they leave my house!!

So knowing that my children personally won't behave this way only offers me small comfort because guess who they are going to have for cousins, be in playgroup with, see at church, and go to school with? Exhibits #1-#7 listed above. THAT'S where the battle is going to come in.


BTW, is anyone else having trouble getting the smiley's to work since they updated the system? It's killing me! *insert cool smiley here*


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Same situation here and a hearty amen to that brother!! There is no question in my mind that if I have kids, they will be a joy to be around and excellent citizens because I won't tolerate anything less. If they wind up in jail, on drugs, or disrespect anyone it will be after they leave my house!!
> 
> So knowing that my children personally won't behave this way only offers me small comfort because guess who they are going to have for cousins, be in playgroup with, see at church, and go to school with? Exhibits #1-#7 listed above. THAT'S where the battle is going to come in.
> 
> 
> BTW, is anyone else having trouble getting the smiley's to work since they updated the system? It's killing me! *insert cool smiley here*



yes- I read on the tech boards that people are having problems- It seems a bit better (for me) now than a few days ago- My msgs are a bit slow when I hit submit-- sometimes I hit refesh and they go right through!


----------



## bdtracey

It truly is sad that natural selection isn't around anymore!  I can't count how many times I said that on our last trip!

I really did see the best shirt while we were down there though...it was a dad that had 4 or 5 girls under the age of 10.  The back of his shirt said "Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups".  Man did I ever laugh at that, pointed it out to DW and loud enough for a few others around me to see it.  They all chuckled and nodded their heads.  I gotta find me one of those shirts....


----------



## supersuperwendy

maddhatir said:


> Another thing was- she hated waiting in line for any rides! It was another hissy b/c she didnt want to wait- do you know what its like to play stinking "I spy" while in line for SOARIN' for 30 minutes- you can only pick out so many things to freakin' spy!- She started again on Buzz Lightyear and I finally just said- KNOCK IT OFF!  I told SIL- I bet she was doing it just to see if you would get out of line with her- that would mean she wins!--- now stay and your both getting on this stinkin ride!!!! Thank god the line was fast for that one.
> 
> The moral of this story--- I like doing Disney better without kids!



You're talking about a five year old, right?  Not a 10 year old.  Of course a 5 year old is going to hate waiting in line.  As an adult you can reason with yourself..that while yes waiting sucks...it's worth it in the long run.  A five year old doesn't have that brain capacity.  I have a 5 year old as my youngest and a 9 year old as my oldest....!  I know from experience that a 5 year old is too young to truely understand.  If my 9 year old complained I'd kick her butt!!!!  But a 5 year old..cut her some slack.


----------



## maddhatir

supersuperwendy said:


> You're talking about a five year old, right?  Not a 10 year old.  Of course a 5 year old is going to hate waiting in line.  As an adult you can reason with yourself..that while yes waiting sucks...it's worth it in the long run.  A five year old doesn't have that brain capacity.  I have a 5 year old as my youngest and a 9 year old as my oldest....!  I know from experience that a 5 year old is too young to truely understand.  If my 9 year old complained I'd kick her butt!!!!  But a 5 year old..cut her some slack.



I see a lot of kids in line behaving themselves- young ones at that! 

NO- no slack cutting here- she needs to learn there are other people in this world besides her and she needs to wait her turn just like everyone else- and it needs to be explained to her that NO ONE wants to wait- its just part of life- need to get them in that thinking pattern EARLY! 

Sorry!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> I see a lot of kids in line behaving themselves- young ones at that!
> 
> NO- no slack cutting here- she needs to learn there are other people in this world besides her and she needs to wait her turn just like everyone else- and it needs to be explained to her that NO ONE wants to wait- its just part of life- need to get them in that thinking pattern EARLY!
> 
> Sorry!



You go girl! And if I could post smileys, you'd get a several little cheerleaders. The sooner kids learn that they are not the only ones in the world the better.That prepares them for adult life in the real world, which is what parenting is all about. You are training them to LEAVE YOU.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> You go girl! And if I could post smileys, you'd get a several little cheerleaders. The sooner kids learn that they are not the only ones in the world the better.That prepares them for adult life in the real world, which is what parenting is all about. You are training them to LEAVE YOU.



I think there is TOO much cutting slack for kiddies now-a-days!- Thats the problem!


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## plgrn

That is Soooooo true.

BTW, guys, I can use smileys now for some reason! Yeahrah!!

     There was my little celebration! I wonder what the problem was?


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> I think there is TOO much cutting slack for kiddies now-a-days!- Thats the problem!



This is so true!!! I think the thing that drives me crazy the most is parents ignoring everything. Little Poindexter is doing a backflip off his chair in the restaurant. Do the parents tell him no. Of course not, they are too busy drinking and talking. Next he is running across the restaurant. Again parents are too busy having a good time. And now that he has been sufficiently ignored he is now screaming bloody murder. Sometimes I swear I am going to smack the next parent I see ignoring all that. 

Another former fencesitter here that is now very happy not having my own devil spawns.


----------



## kennancat

I think it's too much of the parents wanting to be the kids' friends instead of being parents. If at some point, your kids don't tell you how much they hate you, you're not doing it right  I was reading today this advice column where the parents were righting in about their 14YO son's little addiction to pornography. His friends and he are constantly surfing away on the family computer, but they don't want to install any software to restrict sites because then he might think they don't trust him! Horrors! Even the advice columnist was basically saying, uh hello? Wake up and be his parents, not his buddies.

See, this is why I can't have kids - then I won't know exactly what the problems with kids are


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

kennancat said:


> See, this is why I can't have kids - then I won't know exactly what the problems with kids are


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> See, this is why I can't have kids - then I won't know exactly what the problems with kids are



 - and we wouldnt be able to give all of this great advice to the parents for the "cutting of the slack"!!!


----------



## Kate and Pete

My DH and I have also chosen not to have children. We married when we were 24 (and are celebrating our 5th anniversary this Feb. at WDW) and knew BEFORE we got married where we both stood on this.

Still, parents kept saying, "You're young, you will change your mind." Well, five years later, they finally stopped saying it - we're still not having kids. We just don't want them - the same way that so many people DO want them! My best girlfriend just gave birth to a beautiful baby boy - and I adore him - but there's no way that I want my own. We are all allowed to make decisions that fit our lives! And I like kids - I'm a high school English teacher...but I'm just not the type of person who can work all day and come home and be nice and "mom-like" - I know that much about myself! I'm glad that my friend IS the type of person who can - because I can go love on HER baby whenever I want!  

DH and I have a small house filled with love - two cats and two boxer dogs. Trust me - it's plenty!


----------



## almburr

think kids are rude at WDW, watch the shows Daddys little girl and super sweet sixteen these kids (Urchins) can't do anything for anyone, throw fits if daddy wont buy a60,000 dollar car, or spend that much on a party, just cuse you have you dont have to blow it.  I could not beleive how kids act these days. DISGUSTING!. Im only 31 and have 5 well behaved children(everyone has thier moments)  Heres what i tell my kids "it does not matter how much money you have, your never to good to clean your own toilet." which they do.


----------



## Boston5602

When I hit my early 20's I KNEW I wanted kids. Then come my mid 20's , my sister gets pregnant and has to move it with me. After 6 months I came to the understanding I could ( by choice ) not have kids . I did not have what it takes to be a parent and now with both a 6 year old and 11 year old niece at home I know I made the right decision to not have kids. 

I still do what I can and help in the ways I can , you know drive to soccer , cheer leading , homework , meet with the teachers and such. I also know I can just send them to their mother when I'm * sick * of them .


----------



## maddhatir

almburr said:


> think kids are rude at WDW, watch the shows Daddys little girl and super sweet sixteen these kids (Urchins) can't do anything for anyone, throw fits if daddy wont buy a60,000 dollar car, or spend that much on a party, just cuse you have you dont have to blow it.  I could not beleive how kids act these days. DISGUSTING!. Im only 31 and have 5 well behaved children(everyone has thier moments)  Heres what i tell my kids "it does not matter how much money you have, your never to good to clean your own toilet." which they do.



The kids and parents just make me wanna 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




- if they really KNEW what people thought of them, it certainly isnt jealousy, thats for sure!.......ugh! obnoxious- nauseating, disgusting....mutants!

OK I am done...!


----------



## kennancat

almburr said:


> think kids are rude at WDW, watch the shows Daddys little girl and super sweet sixteen these kids (Urchins) can't do anything for anyone, throw fits if daddy wont buy a60,000 dollar car, or spend that much on a party,


This show half cracks me up and half horrifies me. Every time we watch any part of an episode, I turn to DH and tell him that if we ever do have kids, they are *not* going to get away with that kind of behavior. Forget the deposits, that party would be getting cancelled and those kids would be spending most of their "super sweet sixteen" year in their room!


----------



## druidia

Gawd, that show is just a cesspool of self-indulgent brats!  I absolutely cannot stand that show and all that it glorifies to girls today.  It's a shame that it's making it even more desirable to kids when its on MTV.  I think if I had a kid that even TRIED to act like that they would be spending their 16th birthday working in a soup kitchen to learn a little humility.

Don't get me wrong; I recall having a few crying fits over things that I wanted that my parents simply could not afford, and I felt bad about that later in life once I realized what that meant.  

But if you give a kid a party and gifts, etc like that at such a young age, how do you top it? 

You are simply not doing your kid any good to be so indulgent.  They will never learn to make their own way in life when everything is handed to them.


----------



## JennyDrake

(Here's my response to the questions.)

Put on a BIG SMILE and say, "Oh no, I'm allergic to children!" then laugh and change the subject.


----------



## Hixski

Just an observation: We have not had anyone on here lately trying to convince us we are so wrong and will regret our decision. Not that I'm complaining.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Just an observation: We have not had anyone on here lately trying to convince us we are so wrong and will regret our decision. Not that I'm complaining.



I think they are scared of us.......or they finally realized there ARE NO good reason to have kids! (they are all recovering from xmas!)


----------



## korbbec

I don't want any either. I always did want children, until I got into my twenties and the harsh realities of life hit. I do not want to bring any more children into the world. I also just tell people I am too selfish, because it is true. I like to do my own thing- my pets are a big enough responsibility. When people say I will change my mind I then answer "well, if I do I will look into adoption. There are so many older children just waiting for a good home and if I ever feel I can provide one, I will." That usually shuts people up. If they ask why I don't want my own, I give them "the look" and respond that if I adopted a child, he/she would be my own. Duh! -not for me!


----------



## maddhatir

korbbec said:


> I don't want any either. I always did want children, until I got into my twenties and the harsh realities of life hit. I do not want to bring any more children into the world. I also just tell people I am too selfish, because it is true. I like to do my own thing- my pets are a big enough responsibility. When people say I will change my mind I then answer "well, if I do I will look into adoption. There are so many older children just waiting for a good home and if I ever feel I can provide one, I will." That usually shuts people up. If they ask why I don't want my own, I give them "the look" and respond that if I adopted a child, he/she would be my own. Duh! -not for me!


----------



## maddhatir

I was just listening to Robin doing the news on the Howard Stern show and she was talking about a book that is out- that many of US wish parents nowadays would read! It is called *NO! Why Kids--of All Ages--Need to Hear It and Ways Parents Can Say It *

How great is that!?-- See its not just us that think this is true! 

http://www.simonsays.com/content/book.cfm?tab=1&pid=523914

Maybe we can buy some and hand them out as we see fit along our travels!


----------



## plgrn

"Of all ages" is the key there. Some parents don't tell enough discipline to tell *themselves* "no" much less their children.


----------



## maddhatir

and I think the next book coming out has the opposing view- called:

*AW- CUT THEM SOME SLACK*.


----------



## plgrn

I'm just a little frustrated today...

*ALL* of our friends and family members either have children, are pregnant, or both.

Normally, I'm fine with this. I respect their choice and realize that as a child free(less) fencesitter I am in the minority. All our friend's children are also well-behaved or we wouldn't be friends with them to start with

However....   

Lately our friends haven't been able to make plans because they have to take Jr. to karate/basketball/piano/4-H/horse club/and any other thing you can think of.

We were supposed to have dinner with a couple tonight and their 3 kids and they cancelled b/c the kiddies are all sick!

There isn't a No Kidding chapter in our area, and I'm not sure we would qualify to start one as fencesitters. Any ideas for meeting younger child-free couples? We are 24 and 26 and it seems like everyone our age range is either single or breeding! Help!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> I'm just a little frustrated today...
> 
> *ALL* of our friends and family members either have children, are pregnant, or both.
> 
> Normally, I'm fine with this. I respect their choice and realize that as a child free(less) fencesitter I am in the minority. All our friend's children are also well-behaved or we wouldn't be friends with them to start with
> 
> However....
> 
> Lately our friends haven't been able to make plans because they have to take Jr. to karate/basketball/piano/4-H/horse club/and any other thing you can think of.
> 
> We were supposed to have dinner with a couple tonight and their 3 kids and they cancelled b/c the kiddies are all sick!
> 
> There isn't a No Kidding chapter in our area, and I'm not sure we would qualify to start one as fencesitters. Any ideas for meeting younger child-free couples? We are 24 and 26 and it seems like everyone our age range is either single or breeding! Help!



Sorry cant help you there- DH would just do things on our own and we always had fun. It doesnt seem like there are too many people out there who are not breeders, I still dont get the fascination 

DH and I are lucky now b/c we are 40- some of our friends are older now, their kids are getting older and they can watch themselves!


----------



## maddhatir

But am I the only -non-breeder- who watches Nanny 911 for the comedy aspect of the show and yells SUCKER at the TV!!?


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> But am I the only -non-breeder- who watches Nanny 911 for the comedy aspect of the show and yells SUCKER at the TV!!?



I don't watch that show but I could see where you are coming from. DH and I were at the bar at a restaurant the other night. In walks 2 different couples with 4 children apiece about 10 minutes apart. DH and I looked at each other like "Are they nuts" Both groups had 4 children under the age of 5. One mother was pregnant again. It only took about 5 minutes before you could hear screaming from the restaurant. The bartender just shook his head at us. We told him that is why we always eat at the bar.


----------



## JCandKT

plgrn said:


> I'm just a little frustrated today...
> 
> *ALL* of our friends and family members either have children, are pregnant, or both.
> 
> Normally, I'm fine with this. I respect their choice and realize that as a child free(less) fencesitter I am in the minority. All our friend's children are also well-behaved or we wouldn't be friends with them to start with
> 
> However....
> 
> Lately our friends haven't been able to make plans because they have to take Jr. to karate/basketball/piano/4-H/horse club/and any other thing you can think of.
> 
> We were supposed to have dinner with a couple tonight and their 3 kids and they cancelled b/c the kiddies are all sick!
> 
> There isn't a No Kidding chapter in our area, and I'm not sure we would qualify to start one as fencesitters. Any ideas for meeting younger child-free couples? We are 24 and 26 and it seems like everyone our age range is either single or breeding! Help!




We are running into that a lot too lately!  All of our friends, over the past few years, have all had children and now we never see them anymore.  I don't know what to do, how to make new friends, and how to deal with the feelings I have!

I love all of the kids, but sometimes, when you have to make plans months in advance just so they can get a sitter, etc, and then they cancel, it sucks.


----------



## aclov

JCandKT said:


> We are running into that a lot too lately!  All of our friends, over the past few years, have all had children and now we never see them anymore.  I don't know what to do, how to make new friends, and how to deal with the feelings I have!
> 
> I love all of the kids, but sometimes, when you have to make plans months in advance just so they can get a sitter, etc, and then they cancel, it sucks.



I'm lucky that my best friend and her hubby don't have any kids.   Gosh, I would have no one to go out with!     All of my other friends have kids so I hardly see them.


----------



## aclov

maddhatir said:


> But am I the only -non-breeder- who watches Nanny 911 for the comedy aspect of the show and yells SUCKER at the TV!!?



OMG -  I catch that show sometimes and some of those kids are wild    I think it was last weeks that one of the kids was hitting his brother hard and saying "he deserves it"  while the mother wasn't doing anything about it    Who is the child and who is the parent???   When I was young and acted up my mom would say that to me.     

That show is comical, sometimes I wonder how she keeps her sanity


----------



## drag n' fly

plgrn said:


> I'm just a little frustrated today...
> 
> *ALL* of our friends and family members either have children, are pregnant, or both.
> 
> Normally, I'm fine with this. I respect their choice and realize that as a child free(less) fencesitter I am in the minority. All our friend's children are also well-behaved or we wouldn't be friends with them to start with
> 
> However....
> 
> Lately our friends haven't been able to make plans because they have to take Jr. to karate/basketball/piano/4-H/horse club/and any other thing you can think of.
> 
> We were supposed to have dinner with a couple tonight and their 3 kids and they cancelled b/c the kiddies are all sick!
> 
> There isn't a No Kidding chapter in our area, and I'm not sure we would qualify to start one as fencesitters. Any ideas for meeting younger child-free couples? We are 24 and 26 and it seems like everyone our age range is either single or breeding! Help!



Welcome to reality! Time to make some new non-breeding  friends . Try volunteering any extra time you have with organizations that need your help. You may meet some new non breeding friends and maybe have a new appreciation for the ones that continue to breed


----------



## JCandKT

aclov said:


> I'm lucky that my best friend and her hubby don't have any kids.   Gosh, I would have no one to go out with!     All of my other friends have kids so I hardly see them.




Yeah, we had several "couples" that are good friends and we all didn't have children... and now, we're the last couple that is childless.  I am only 27 so there is plenty of time to decide, but in the interim, it's difficult.  It's hard to find friends (let alone TIME to find them with work and school).  We have one couple that are older than us that chose not to have children, so we see them a lot, but it's hard to relate with them sometimes since they are our parents age.

I've been thinking a lot today about the subject and wonder if I'll ever want to become a mommy.  I like my independence, and I am entirely too selfish at this stage of life.

It sounds like I'm trying to convince myself!


----------



## plgrn

JCandKT said:


> I love all of the kids, but sometimes, when you have to make plans months in advance just so they can get a sitter, etc, and then they cancel, it sucks.



At least they will consider GETTING a sitter. Our friends bring their kids everywhere. I'm thinking of inviting them on "double dates" and if they refuse, at least they will be getting the picture that we are interested in doing things WITHOUT their kiddos.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Sorry cant help you there- DH would just do things on our own and we always had fun.



That's what DH had rather do anyway. Maybe he has a point!


----------



## kennancat

plgrn said:


> At least they will consider GETTING a sitter. Our friends bring their kids everywhere.


Do you have any idea why they won't use a sitter? Is it a matter of not knowing where to find somebody good (in which case maybe you could ask around your office or neighborhood to help them), or are they the "I would never leave my children" types? We're working on setting up a child-proof room in our house so that our friends can come over to visit and the kids will have a safe place to play. Don't know if something like that might work for you too. Our house is all travertine floors and lots of glass pieces - neither good for little heads or little hands!


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> Do you have any idea why they won't use a sitter? Is it a matter of not knowing where to find somebody good (in which case maybe you could ask around your office or neighborhood to help them), or are they the "I would never leave my children" types? We're working on setting up a child-proof room in our house so that our friends can come over to visit and the kids will have a safe place to play. Don't know if something like that might work for you too. Our house is all travertine floors and lots of glass pieces - neither good for little heads or little hands!



Wow- are your friends chipping in with some cash for you guys to re-do your room!? 

My house is soooooo kid un-friendly- when we have family get togethers- my MIL yells at me all the time-- I have a wire in my kitchen for the antenna to my satellite radio-- hey- I have to move the antenna all the time to get reception- she asked what its for......ummm...ITS FOR _ME-_ TO MAKE _ME _HAPPY WHEN I LISTEN TO MY MUSIC!!!!!! leave it there!

We have a chess set just as a display in our living room with tiny pieces, in reach of all the kiddies- oooops!

The stairs to our finished basement are in our kitchen and we dont have a door --- everytime the kids come over we have to put something in front of the steps....ooops!

My poor little niece--  I have tons of braided rugs around my house- DH and I are fine with them (not slipping on them- I dont put the pad under them) she runs into the house, slides on the rug and ends up under the settee.......that is next to the chess set!!! she was fine! oooops!

I dont want the kids to get hurt- but everything looks fine through MY eyes- DH and I dont think much about safety!

ACTUALLY! That made me think about what I say to DH all of the time b/c he is so, um, what should I say-- NOT into safety, some of the things I catch him doing.....I just have to turn away! If I hear him scream I will quickly dial 911 

 I tell DH that I am getting him a T-shirt made saying:
SAFETY IS NOT AN ISSUE!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

plgrn said:


> I'm just a little frustrated today...
> 
> *ALL* of our friends and family members either have children, are pregnant, or both.
> 
> Normally, I'm fine with this. I respect their choice and realize that as a child free(less) fencesitter I am in the minority. All our friend's children are also well-behaved or we wouldn't be friends with them to start with
> 
> However....
> 
> Lately our friends haven't been able to make plans because they have to take Jr. to karate/basketball/piano/4-H/horse club/and any other thing you can think of.
> 
> We were supposed to have dinner with a couple tonight and their 3 kids and they cancelled b/c the kiddies are all sick!
> 
> There isn't a No Kidding chapter in our area, and I'm not sure we would qualify to start one as fencesitters. Any ideas for meeting younger child-free couples? We are 24 and 26 and it seems like everyone our age range is either single or breeding! Help!


Sorry, can't help you but I know exactly what you are talking about!!  I would love to start a No Kidding group but I haven't taken the time to really look into it.  Of course, my biggest fear would be that we'd be the only members as the Majority of people ARE breeders!


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> Wow- are your friends chipping in with some cash for you guys to re-do your room!?


Well, it's also going to be the "back-up" guest bedroom, so that's how I've justified it to myself  Plus, we haven't put much money into it - the whole point was really to have an empty carpeted room. I think the only thing I've bought for it was a ceiling fan with light kit  so I could move the halogen lamp to another room (where I need more lighting anyway). The TV, VCR, and TV stand were all ones that we already had in other parts of the house, and I was doing some reorganizing anyway. I might get some outlet covers, but those are cheap. Although there's another great part of being CF - I have empty rooms that I can move about at will!  We have a 5BR/4BA, and we have gotten comments about why we need that much space when we don't have kids. Why don't these people get that I need a separate computer room, exercise room, and a project room?


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> the whole point was really to have an empty carpeted room.



just add some padding to the walls and put the kids in there!


----------



## bdtracey

kennancat said:


> Why don't these people get that I need a separate computer room, exercise room, and a project room?



AGREED!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> just add some padding to the walls and put the kids in there!




Pint sized straight jackets wouldn't hurt either.

Oops, did I say that out loud?


----------



## dcox931

plgrn said:


> Pint sized straight jackets wouldn't hurt either.
> 
> Oops, did I say that out loud?


----------



## plgrn

dcox931 said:


>


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Pint sized straight jackets wouldn't hurt either.
> 
> Oops, did I say that out loud?



Yes you did- I heard it _loud and clear _over here in Jersey!


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> just add some padding to the walls and put the kids in there!


Our closest friends have twin 1-year old boys starting to walk - that may be just what they need in a year or two!


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> Our closest friends have twin 1-year old boys starting to walk - that may be just what they need in a year or two!



 one of nephews is just starting to walk-- he cracks me up- he walks like he is drunk and it seems his head is too big b/c he cant keep himself straight whichever way his head leans- he just goes in that direction 

Padded walls would be a good idea!


----------



## zima-cheryl

plgrn said:


> Lately our friends haven't been able to make plans because they have to take Jr. to karate/basketball/piano/4-H/horse club/and any other thing you can think of.
> :



Check out the book "Why Don't you Have Kids?" by Leslie Lafayette.  It is a bit dated (90's) but very relevant.  Sections on loosing friends to kids, setting up your own Childfree group, and even tips on helping you decide which side of the fence you may fall on.  

It is hard - but even if you meet 1 or 2 other couples (the No Kidding group in our area is about 8 people) it is at least a small group of support & people you can hang with.  

And when all else fails just drag you DH out.  There are plenty of dinners, shows, movies, concerts, hockey games, museums, etc. for the 2 of you to keep busy & happy.


----------



## zima-cheryl

This is a bit off topic - but has anyone out there had the Essure procedure done?  2 years running my doctor has suggested it for us.  I like the idea of no pills, shots or other additional hormones.  But am not sure about the permanent part of this.  I have 3 pins in my hand from a broken bone - not sure I need any other new pieces.

I would really appreciate any info. or feedback from anyone who has had the procedure already.

Thanks!


----------



## plgrn

zima-cheryl said:


> This is a bit off topic - but has anyone out there had the Essure procedure done?  2 years running my doctor has suggested it for us.  I like the idea of no pills, shots or other additional hormones.  But am not sure about the permanent part of this.  I have 3 pins in my hand from a broken bone - not sure I need any other new pieces.
> 
> I would really appreciate any info. or feedback from anyone who has had the procedure already.
> 
> Thanks!



You'll probably get more views and responses if you post on the community board. A lot more people view that board than this thread.


----------



## LindsayDunn228

maddhatir said:


> But am I the only -non-breeder- who watches Nanny 911 for the comedy aspect of the show and yells SUCKER at the TV!!?


Me and my husband totally do this!!!


----------



## maddhatir

LindsayDunn228 said:


> Me and my husband totally do this!!!



I think it is interesting the way the parents are on Nanny 911 and Supernanny- 

It seems they never want to deal with with the kids b/c they are annoying and it takes up too much of their time..........ah hello!? thats why WE didnt HAVE kids- I guess those people didnt get the memo!


----------



## maddhatir

I was checking around some sites today for stickers for my helmet and came across these......


----------



## JCandKT

by a duck!!!!  oh my!!!  LOL
that's hilarious.


----------



## Hixski

Check out this story. Finally some justice for the childfree (and the ones with children who don't like this either).
http://my.earthlink.net/article/nat?guid=20070123/45b59650_3ca6_1552620070123-675767606

Now if we could just get them to do this in the restaurants......


----------



## maddhatir

man- that must stink when you cant get the kid to calm down!

I dont know how parents put up with it--- I would say-- how about you just take HER off and we will fly home!


----------



## plgrn

So the parents get REWARDED for allowing that kind of behavior. They get a flight refund and credit to fly anywhere in the country?  

Words fail me.

If you nip that behavior "in the bud" at home, you shouldn't have to worry about it in public. Who knows what that child does on a daily basis that no one but Mommy sees


----------



## Hixski

plgrn said:


> So the parents get REWARDED for allowing that kind of behavior. They get a flight refund and credit to fly anywhere in the country?
> 
> Words fail me.
> 
> If you nip that behavior "in the bud" at home, you shouldn't have to worry about it in public. Who knows what that child does on a daily basis that no one but Mommy sees



There is a thread on the CB about this too. I don't think they should get the extra credit either. But they are too mad about this incident to ever fly on them again. I just wish the other airlines would start this. At least on that thread the parents are even on our side.


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:


> But they are too mad about this incident to ever fly on them again. I just wish the other airlines would start this. At least on that thread the parents are even on our side.


Yeah, my thought is sign me up to fly Airtran more often!


----------



## Mischa

I don't think the parents should have been given an "award".  Getting their money back is one thing, but to get extra tickets to anywhere Air Tran flies is ridiculous.  Just amazing!

I wonder what the other passengers were doing when this was going on?  I know I wouldn't have been able to take a screaming/crying child for very long!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Mischa said:


> I don't think the parents should have been given an "award".  Getting their money back is one thing, but to get extra tickets to anywhere Air Tran flies is ridiculous.  Just amazing!
> 
> I wonder what the other passengers were doing when this was going on?  I know I wouldn't have been able to take a screaming/crying child for very long!


EXACTLY!!  How about refunding my money and giving me some free credits for having to listen to that crap!!  I think I honestly would have had to get off that plane.  Tonight at a restaurant a kid was SCREAMING his head off because he wanted to stand in the middle of the restaurant and his mom *made* him sit down.  That kid was as stiff as a board in her arms, bloody red in the face and screaming his fool head off!!  Why didn't she just take the darn kid outside??  And I don't want to hear that maybe the kid has emotional/learning disabilities or the mom "deserved" to eat her dinner.  To hell with that, I deserve to eat my meal in peace!!  It's just like smoking.  Take it outside, I don't smoke and I don't want to smell it or breathe in your second hand smoke.  I don't have kids and I don't want to deal with yours!!

And another thing, I was at a seminar about a month ago that  I had to pay for.  It was a food demonstration and tasting.  This woman brings her three kids and I had to sit next to one of them.  The kid proceeded to scribble ALL over his hand in black ink and then proceeded to LICK it off!!  That wasn't even the worse part.  He then proceeded to take his finger like a drill and dig in his nose until it was bleeding!!  THEN, he smeared the nasty blood all over himself and all over the table!!  God, I wanted to vomit!!! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 And I was coming out of my seat!!  The mother was completely oblivious!!  So, I've shared this story w/ a few people who have children because I don't know anyone in real life who doesn't and all but one said the same damn thing.  "Well, sometimes you have no choice but to bring your children.  Sometimes you can't get childcare. . . blah, blah, blah, blah!!"  Give me a freakin' break!!!  This isn't an emergency where a loved one's been rushed to the hospital emergency room and you *HAVE* to get there!!  Or Grandma's on her death bed and you have to get there w/ no notice!  This was a flippin food seminar!  She didn't *have* to be there with her kids and she did have a choice not to bring them.  Sorry about your luck, lady, if you lost some money cause you couldn't find a sitter!!  Why did everyone else have to put up w/ her unruly child?  

So, thanks for letting me get that off my chest.  It was so aggravating not having anyone understand, especially when they said "Well, sometimes you just don't have a choice _but_ to bring the kids."

OK, I'm stepping off my soapbox now.


----------



## maddhatir

DH and I left a restaurant before b/c of a bratty kid--

We JUST wanted to relax and have a nice meal-- NO! 

This freakin' kid is screaming his head off- and of course the parents could care less about anyone else in the place- DH and I got our menus and while trying to decide what to order we heard the kid-we looked at each other and then said A-DI-OS!!!!

WHY do parents think it is OK for the rest of us to put up with YOUR kid's screaming b/c YOU want a night out?!


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> WHY do parents think it is OK for the rest of us to put up with YOUR kid's screaming b/c YOU want a night out?!


I wonder sometimes if this has changed over the last generation or so. My parents (who clearly had at least one child  ) often complain about how no one takes their kids out of restaurants any more. They've told me stories about how frequently one of them ate alone while the other was outside with me. I just find it funny that they complain about it too.


----------



## kennancat

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> And another thing, I was at a seminar about a month ago that  I had to pay for.  It was a food demonstration and tasting.


All I can say is  I can't even stand to quote your whole post because reading it makes me queasy! Had I been in your situation, I would have yakked, no doubt, and I can guarantee you there would have been some aiming involved


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> I wonder sometimes if this has changed over the last generation or so. My parents (who clearly had at least one child  ) often complain about how no one takes their kids out of restaurants any more. They've told me stories about how frequently one of them ate alone while the other was outside with me. I just find it funny that they complain about it too.



Lets refer back to Nanny 911- a lot of parents are totally oblivious to just about eveything- they tune the kids out- what do they care 

OR, Maybe they think "If *I *have to suffer, SO DO YOU!"


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Lets refer back to Nanny 911- a lot of parents are totally oblivious to just about eveything- they tune the kids out- what do they care
> 
> OR, Maybe they think "If *I *have to suffer, SO DO YOU!"



Oh, don't forget. If you are childfree they don't think you should have an opinion about their precious offspring. We are just overly sensitive because we don't have children.


----------



## Mischa

Hixski said:


> Oh, don't forget. If you are childfree they don't think you should have an opinion about their precious offspring. We are just overly sensitive because we don't have children.



I can't stand that phrase "...overly sensitive because we don't have children..." I have heard that so many times from former friends who have kids.  We've made it a point not to socialize with them because their kids never behave.  I have one friend who has 4 kids and none behave - they do whatever they want.  I've told her or tried to make the kid behave (at least a little) and she'll say to me "well, you just don't understand - you don't have kids."  I'm like "excuse the heck out of me lady!"  She usually shuts up when I say "you never acted this way when YOU were growing up, did you?"  She's a few years younger than me and she was a very well behaved little girl.  

(I had no choice but to be well behaved - I was an only child and my parents were in their 40s when they adopted me, so I hung around older people and just didn't misbehave.  Sure I would act up but one look from my mom or dad and I was sitting like an angel!)

Watching parents these days I think "what are you - afraid of your own child?"  There is a word they all need to learn and that word is "Discipline"!  Learn to discipline your child!   

OH!  And one of my friends who has a very ADD or HADD kid (whatever he is) thinks that letting people see him acting up with embarrass him into behaving.     I refuse to go out to lunch with her if she's bringing him!  

I love kids (wish I could have at least one but I can't).  But some of these kids that are so out of control - they drive me crazy!  Not only do the kids need help - the parents need help in learning how to be the parent.

And ForTheLoveofDisney - I would have been sick if I were in your shoes at that seminar.  The writing on himself is one thing, but the nose thing...That's just gross! 

The scary thing is...is these are the kids of the future - these kids will one day grow up and probably have kids themselves.    Can you imagine their kids and how they will behave????????  I shutter to even think about it!

Gee it feels nice to vent.


----------



## vatmark

Hello! I just wanted to pipe in here. I havent' read through the entire thread but in regards to the orginal post I think people have a right to chose wether they want kids or not. Why is it any of my business. I would rather see someone not have children then have children just because they think they should. Then they stick their kids in daycare at birth. Basically the daycare ends up raising these kids because the parents don't want to be bothered. 

I read some of the stories of these parents and kids behavior and it disgusts me as well and I am the mother of 2 kids. Please don't think that all parents and kids behave this way. Yes, a lot do but not all.  Me and DH would never allow any of that stuff to go on. Disipline starts at home. My kids are expected to behave at home, in others homes and out in public. If they don't they get their butts handed to them. If they were to start up in a restaurant they would be dragged out. Obviously that little girl on the plane is allowed to act that way at home so why should it be any different in public. And for the parents to be all up in arms is ridiculous. Yes, lets all just sit here on the plane because they can't control their own kid. Just ridiculous!!!!

Me and DH have gone out to lunch before alone w/o kids and have asked to be moved several times because we were next to a family where the kids were all over the place. It's just plain rude. Sometimes I think these parents think it is cute. Oh look at little Johnny going under someone elses table. He is just the cutest thing. 

My own sisters kid is not allowed in my house. Yes, it sounds horrible but it's how it's got to be. My kids are taught to respect us, our house, their things and our things and others things. My sisters kids have no respect for their own house so there is no way they are coming in my house. Well at least not the 2 1/2 year old. That kid is a menace and allowed to be that way. He destroys everything-he has broken the ceiling fan globes in his room 2 times, clogged up many a toilet with toothpaste tubes, legos etc. One toilet even had to be pulled up. Writes on walls, took scissors to his pj's, breaks cd's and dvd's in half,  poured water into the neighbors mower and into my sisters mower, calls his parenst stupid idiot and me as well etc etc and this was in the last 6 months.  I have told my sister that the kid is not allowed into the house until he's 35. Whenever I hear another distruction story the age goes up further. Whenever we have a family holiday it has to be held at her house.

I am not going to let a bratty undisciplined almost 3 year old come into my house(nephew or not) and destroy it. My kids don't why should I let hers. 

And my sister would expect me to rearrange my whole house so her kid could come over and she wouldn't have to worry about watching him. God forbid she watch her own kid. She's sent e-mails to others such as my brother and my stepmom who she was going to visit and be staying with and has this big list of things to move etc. Why should anyone have to rearrange their own house for your child. It's called be a parent and watch your child. 

Both my kids are in school but I sometimes go out with my sister and her son. Well the kid doesn't want mom to stop and pick up Aunt Ann because he knows I won't put up with his crap when we are out. I end up disiplining him when we are out. I have dragged his little butt down an isle many a time because he wouldn't follow us. Of course he would then run to mommy for protection. 

Yes, my sisters kid is one of those kids that would be climbing under tables, on top of tables, running around a restaurant, yelling and carrying on. My sister would just sit there and tune it out and make everyone else have to listen to it. 

My sister lives right down the street from me and many times we decide not to go down there because we don't want to have to listen to and deal with their children when we could sit at home while our kids are upstairs behaving and being quiet. 

So even though I am a breeder  I have to agree and sympathize with you non-breeders. There are a lot of parents out there who just don't disipline their kids and make things miserable for those around them.

Annie


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hixski said:


> Oh, don't forget. If you are childfree they don't think you should have an opinion about their precious offspring. We are just overly sensitive because we don't have children.


I hate this phrase too!!   I may not have children but I am not blind in how they are misbehaving!



Mischa said:


> I can't stand that phrase "...overly sensitive because we don't have children..." I have heard that so many times from former friends who have kids.  We've made it a point not to socialize with them because their kids never behave.  I have one friend who has 4 kids and none behave - they do whatever they want.  I've told her or tried to make the kid behave (at least a little) and she'll say to me "well, you just don't understand - you don't have kids."  I'm like "excuse the heck out of me lady!"  She usually shuts up when I say "you never acted this way when YOU were growing up, did you?"  She's a few years younger than me and she was a very well behaved little girl.
> 
> (I had no choice but to be well behaved - I was an only child and my parents were in their 40s when they adopted me, so I hung around older people and just didn't misbehave.  Sure I would act up but one look from my mom or dad and I was sitting like an angel!)
> 
> Watching parents these days I think "what are you - afraid of your own child?"  There is a word they all need to learn and that word is "Discipline"!  Learn to discipline your child!
> 
> OH!  And one of my friends who has a very ADD or HADD kid (whatever he is) thinks that letting people see him acting up with embarrass him into behaving.     I refuse to go out to lunch with her if she's bringing him!
> 
> I love kids (wish I could have at least one but I can't).  But some of these kids that are so out of control - they drive me crazy!  Not only do the kids need help - the parents need help in learning how to be the parent.
> 
> And ForTheLoveofDisney - I would have been sick if I were in your shoes at that seminar.  The writing on himself is one thing, but the nose thing...That's just gross!
> 
> The scary thing is...is these are the kids of the future - these kids will one day grow up and probably have kids themselves.    Can you imagine their kids and how they will behave????????  I shutter to even think about it!
> 
> Gee it feels nice to vent.


I just said this to my sister the other night.  When did parents become "afraid" of their children?  

And all this crap that parents are fed today. . .

Don't discipline your children, they need to be free to express themselves.
Your child can't help but act this way, he/she has ADD/ADHD
You can't take that away from little Johnnie, you'll hurt his feelings and stunt his emotional growth.
Don't stifle your child's screams and outbursts, he's just expressing himself and if you say something to him you will give him low self esteem.

It reminds me of an episode of The Unit (love that show  ) that was on a few weeks ago.

The plot was, Jonas (one of the head guys in The Unit) went to a party where they were *finally* awarding his WWII Veteran father with a  medal that he should have received years ago.  But because he was a black man in segregated times, even though he fought as galiantly as the rest of the troops, the award was long and slow coming as the story goes.  Well, Jonas' nephew and his wife show up and in the show, the nephew starts beating on his pregnant wife.

Jonas' gets him off of her and roughs him up himself and says a few choice words and then the nephew tells Jonas'.  "They tell me I have PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) and these things are going to happen."   And Jonas goes into this long detailed account of how the grandfather, segregated in WWII _and_ when he came home, fought nobley in the worst of situations.  How he wasn't respected for doing the same hard, dirty work.  How he saw his share of bloodshed and fighting and how he left no man behind (which is why he was getting the medal).  Jonas said, "No one told him he had a right to be angry.  No one told him it was ok to come back home and beat up on his wife."

I guess my whole point in telling that story is that when I saw it, I DID think of society today.  Today, people are told they have conditions which give them the right to do pretty much what they want to do, and a few of these conditions have even gotten people off for crimes they've committed.

I'm not saying that disorders *don't* exist!  I whole-heartedly believe that they do.  I just think that these disorders are abused and are a "get out of jail. . . behave how ever you want card."

You're right, you just didn't see this kind of behavior years ago and people didn't act like this.  And truth is, I think I had ADD as a child but it never stopped my mother/father from making me behave myself.  Do we think that ADD is a new thing?  It wasn't around in the 50's or 60's or 70's?  No, I just think it was controlled alot better and kids were not allowed to run amuck!

OK, sorry for the long winded post.  You guys are my only link to the Childfree world and I guess I get going on my tangets because I finally feel like someone understands and I'm not stepping on somebody's feelings.

Oh, and there was a time that DH and I yearned for a child too, but due to medical circumstances we couldn't.  Now, I'm leaning more and more (like 95% of the time) to just forget kids.


----------



## kennancat

vatmark said:


> Well at least not the 2 1/2 year old. That kid is a menace and allowed to be that way.


Dang - not even three and he's already caused that much damage? I wouldn't be surprised if you reported back that his head started spinning and he's spitting up pea soup!


----------



## maddhatir

vatmark said:


> Hello! I just wanted to pipe in here. I havent' read through the entire thread but in regards to the orginal post I think people have a right to chose wether they want kids or not. Why is it any of my business. I would rather see someone not have children then have children just because they think they should. Then they stick their kids in daycare at birth. Basically the daycare ends up raising these kids because the parents don't want to be bothered.
> 
> I read some of the stories of these parents and kids behavior and it disgusts me as well and I am the mother of 2 kids. Please don't think that all parents and kids behave this way. Yes, a lot do but not all.  Me and DH would never allow any of that stuff to go on. Disipline starts at home. My kids are expected to behave at home, in others homes and out in public. If they don't they get their butts handed to them. If they were to start up in a restaurant they would be dragged out. Obviously that little girl on the plane is allowed to act that way at home so why should it be any different in public. And for the parents to be all up in arms is ridiculous. Yes, lets all just sit here on the plane because they can't control their own kid. Just ridiculous!!!!
> 
> Me and DH have gone out to lunch before alone w/o kids and have asked to be moved several times because we were next to a family where the kids were all over the place. It's just plain rude. Sometimes I think these parents think it is cute. Oh look at little Johnny going under someone elses table. He is just the cutest thing.
> 
> My own sisters kid is not allowed in my house. Yes, it sounds horrible but it's how it's got to be. My kids are taught to respect us, our house, their things and our things and others things. My sisters kids have no respect for their own house so there is no way they are coming in my house. Well at least not the 2 1/2 year old. That kid is a menace and allowed to be that way. He destroys everything-he has broken the ceiling fan globes in his room 2 times, clogged up many a toilet with toothpaste tubes, legos etc. One toilet even had to be pulled up. Writes on walls, took scissors to his pj's, breaks cd's and dvd's in half,  poured water into the neighbors mower and into my sisters mower, calls his parenst stupid idiot and me as well etc etc and this was in the last 6 months.  I have told my sister that the kid is not allowed into the house until he's 35. Whenever I hear another distruction story the age goes up further. Whenever we have a family holiday it has to be held at her house.
> 
> I am not going to let a bratty undisciplined almost 3 year old come into my house(nephew or not) and destroy it. My kids don't why should I let hers.
> 
> And my sister would expect me to rearrange my whole house so her kid could come over and she wouldn't have to worry about watching him. God forbid she watch her own kid. She's sent e-mails to others such as my brother and my stepmom who she was going to visit and be staying with and has this big list of things to move etc. Why should anyone have to rearrange their own house for your child. It's called be a parent and watch your child.
> 
> Both my kids are in school but I sometimes go out with my sister and her son. Well the kid doesn't want mom to stop and pick up Aunt Ann because he knows I won't put up with his crap when we are out. I end up disiplining him when we are out. I have dragged his little butt down an isle many a time because he wouldn't follow us. Of course he would then run to mommy for protection.
> 
> Yes, my sisters kid is one of those kids that would be climbing under tables, on top of tables, running around a restaurant, yelling and carrying on. My sister would just sit there and tune it out and make everyone else have to listen to it.
> 
> My sister lives right down the street from me and many times we decide not to go down there because we don't want to have to listen to and deal with their children when we could sit at home while our kids are upstairs behaving and being quiet.
> 
> So even though I am a breeder  I have to agree and sympathize with you non-breeders. There are a lot of parents out there who just don't disipline their kids and make things miserable for those around them.
> 
> Annie



 

I for one would like to vote you "Pesident of all Parents" and I will give you your first assignment-- You will be starting a class for parents called:

*"NO MORE CUTTING SLACK-- GIVE 'EM JUST A LITTLE WACK"
A Field Guide to Parenting 101*


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Oh, don't forget. If you are childfree they don't think you should have an opinion about their precious offspring. We are just overly sensitive because we don't have children.



NO! We are not _sensitive_....

Its more like parents are just "_desensitized_"


----------



## FantasmicDreams

I am definately going to look into Airtran as my airline of choice now.


----------



## plgrn

FantasmicDreams said:


> I am definately going to look into Airtran as my airline of choice now.




Wouldn't that be hilarious if their sales dramatically INCREASE because of this incident? Go Airtran!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

maddhatir said:


> I for one would like to vote you "Pesident of all Parents" and I will give you your first assignment-- You will be starting a class for parents called:
> 
> *"NO MORE CUTTING SLACK-- GIVE 'EM JUST A LITTLE WACK"
> A Field Guide to Parenting 101*








I'd vote for ya!!  



maddhatir said:


> NO! We are not _sensitive_....
> 
> Its more like parents are just "_desensitized_"


  

Ain't that the truth!!   

What a great comeback!   I'm going to tuck that away for future use!  "No, I'm not "just" sensitive.  You're just desensitized!!"  Oh, that's great!!


----------



## maddhatir

We fly Airtran all the time--

December 2005 DH and I took our (3 yr old at the time) niece to Disney (just us) and flew Airtran-- OMG! My worse fear was that she was going to act up on the plane!  

My SIL packed her little DVD player and she was good the whole time- I dont even think she spoke much!  When we were getting off the plane- the woman in front of us commented to me she didnt even know there was a child behind her. Thank GOD! b/c I know I wouldnt want to deal with a kid behind me- or even around me acting up!

I was telling DH about the Airtran story and he said he was surprised they even booted them b/c it is such a hassel for the airline b/c they have to unload their luggage from below and it takes some time blah blah- I told him I didnt know the full details about what happened to their luggage- he is so techincal-- I AM TELLING YOU ABOUT A BRATTY KID GETTING THROWN OFF THE PLANE AND YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT LUGGAGE


----------



## Hixski

This is a quote from someone witnessing the situation that was on ABC News.com message board.

Quote:
"I was at the gate in Ft. Meyers waiting for the Air Tran flight to take off for Boston so I could board the next arriving flight that would be headed to Atlanta. I witnessed this family 30 minutes prior to their flight taking off and this child was disobedient and unruly to the parents. Several waiting passengers commented on the lack of control. Then I saw the family deplane and the child was absolutely out of control for another 30 to 40 minutes. She was screaming, kicking, and crawling across the floor. The mother had NO control and the father ignored the situation. I am upset that the media has played this as a sympathetic situation to the parents as it was clearly an issue of poor parenting. I too am the mother of two children and this would have NEVER occured as I would have gotten both myself and my child away from the other passengers had either of my children behaved this way." 


Someone else was saying the parents are blaming the incident on the airline and now "childless adults".

Quote:
"I find it very offensive that she is putting blame not only on the airline, but on "childless adults"! Sorry lady that is just wrong! The blame is on you and your husband for not having better control of your child."


I just knew we were going to get blamed for this somehow.


----------



## MickeyNicki

DH and I have been married 10 years and were together 6 years before that.  We do not want any kids.  I have 2 nieces, 4 and 10.5 (going on 30) and that is enough for us.  We took them to WDW this past Oct and after that 5 day trip I was for sure not having kids!

I do not feel that I have to justify my reasoning to anyone.  We like to travel, have nice cars, live in a quiet state and kids would ruin that for us.  Does that make me a bad person?  

My mom is a bit freaked out about it, she said that she always thought I would have a ton of kids....I do love kids...other peoples for a short time!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> This is a quote from someone witnessing the situation that was on ABC News.com message board.
> 
> Quote:
> "I was at the gate in Ft. Meyers waiting for the Air Tran flight to take off for Boston so I could board the next arriving flight that would be headed to Atlanta. I witnessed this family 30 minutes prior to their flight taking off and this child was disobedient and unruly to the parents. Several waiting passengers commented on the lack of control. Then I saw the family deplane and the child was absolutely out of control for another 30 to 40 minutes. She was screaming, kicking, and crawling across the floor. The mother had NO control and the father ignored the situation. I am upset that the media has played this as a sympathetic situation to the parents as it was clearly an issue of poor parenting. I too am the mother of two children and this would have NEVER occured as I would have gotten both myself and my child away from the other passengers had either of my children behaved this way."
> 
> 
> Someone else was saying the parents are blaming the incident on the airline and now "childless adults".
> 
> Quote:
> "I find it very offensive that she is putting blame not only on the airline, but on "childless adults"! Sorry lady that is just wrong! The blame is on you and your husband for not having better control of your child."
> 
> 
> I just knew we were going to get blamed for this somehow.



OH! You know whats coming next-- LAWSUIT!!! booo hoooo!


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> NO! We are not _sensitive_....
> 
> Its more like parents are just "_desensitized_"


You know, I think this is true, but I don't mean that in a bad way. We were over at our friends' the other day, and they don't notice the kids making random noises in the background like we do. I think you'd have to learn to tune the noise out a bit or it'd drive you nuts!


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:


> Quote:
> "I was at the gate in Ft. Meyers waiting for the Air Tran flight to take off for Boston so I could board the next arriving flight that would be headed to Atlanta. I witnessed this family 30 minutes prior to their flight taking off and this child was disobedient and unruly to the parents. Several waiting passengers commented on the lack of control. Then I saw the family deplane and the child was absolutely out of control for another 30 to 40 minutes. She was screaming, kicking, and crawling across the floor. The mother had NO control and the father ignored the situation. I am upset that the media has played this as a sympathetic situation to the parents as it was clearly an issue of poor parenting. I too am the mother of two children and this would have NEVER occured as I would have gotten both myself and my child away from the other passengers had either of my children behaved this way."


Dang - too bad nobody filmed it. Bet that would be worth some money now! I did see on the news this morning that the family had to wait 24 hours before they could fly again because they had been kicked off a flight. Now that makes me understand their frustration and why Airtran comp'ed them. While it sounds like these parents have zero control, it would have been nice if they could have taken the next flight out, after she'd finally worn herself out from the screaming. Or after they'd drugged the kid


----------



## druidia

> Do we think that ADD is a new thing? It wasn't around in the 50's or 60's or 70's? No, I just think it was controlled alot better and kids were not allowed to run amuck!



I've always hated the diagnoses of ADHD/ADD...they seem like such a cop-out.  I recall being a very hyper child, and it was mostly because I was bored.  I did not have a problem that required medication, I needed attention and something to do.  I think today parents are just too quick to medicate because they don't want to be bothered with their children or giving them attention.  Why do these people have kids to begin with?


----------



## Mischa

That's the key - parents don't want to be "bothered" with their own kids!


----------



## maddhatir

Did anyone see the interview with the parents on GMA???

They said the kid had ear surgery (not sure how long ago)

The father said maybe on the flight down she had pain in her ear-- and when they were going home- she associated the plane with the ear pain and thats why she was like she was 

Then why wasnt she misbehaving on the flight down if she was in that much pain........

once again-- excuses parents make for their kids!


----------



## vatmark

God that makes me sick. 

Stop with the excuses already.  They should just admit that they are embarassed about their childs behavior and know that it is their own poor parenting to blame. 

When does the lawsuit start. 

Annie


----------



## Hixski

Since they are blaming "childless adults" too I think "WE" should all sue for defamation of character.


----------



## kennancat

Arghh - okay, the "Woman 35 and older who've had babies" thread on the CB is depressing me  We're 32 right now, and I'm back on the fence about the whole kids thing. I really wish I could pick a side and stay on it! I definitely don't want kids right now, but I can't help but think that if I ever do, there are only so many years left to do it. And I swear, every couple I know has had fertility problems, regardless of age. I know as least two couples that IVF'd and suspect a third is thinking about it. And it's so unfair that women have a shorter "shelf life", so to speak, then men. I actually made a couple of calls when I was still doing my undergrad to find out if I could have my eggs frozen. AT the time the technology just wasnt there yet. If I ever do have a daughter, I'll offer to pay for hers at 20 just so she doesn't have to feel pressured later 

At this point, I think I know myself well enough to know that I'll always wonder what would happen if I'd made the other choice, whether we have kids or not. That's been the hardest part for me about getting older - it feels like every choice I make reduces the number of choices I have left. I know we just need to make the best decision possible with the information we have now and decide that we're going to be happy with it. When I'm being rational, I really do think that happiness is a decision; if you decide you're going to find the things in your life that are good and enjoy them, you'll be happy. If you look for things to be depressed about, you'll find them too no matter how good your life is.

And now my little pity party/hissy fit is over and you can return to your usual DISsing


----------



## Hixski

kennancat said:


> Arghh - okay, the "Woman 35 and older who've had babies" thread on the CB is depressing me  We're 32 right now, and I'm back on the fence about the whole kids thing. I really wish I could pick a side and stay on it! I definitely don't want kids right now, but I can't help but think that if I ever do, there are only so many years left to do it. And I swear, every couple I know has had fertility problems, regardless of age. I know as least two couples that IVF'd and suspect a third is thinking about it. And it's so unfair that women have a shorter "shelf life", so to speak, then men. I actually made a couple of calls when I was still doing my undergrad to find out if I could have my eggs frozen. AT the time the technology just wasnt there yet. If I ever do have a daughter, I'll offer to pay for hers at 20 just so she doesn't have to feel pressured later
> 
> At this point, I think I know myself well enough to know that I'll always wonder what would happen if I'd made the other choice, whether we have kids or not. That's been the hardest part for me about getting older - it feels like every choice I make reduces the number of choices I have left. I know we just need to make the best decision possible with the information we have now and decide that we're going to be happy with it. When I'm being rational, I really do think that happiness is a decision; if you decide you're going to find the things in your life that are good and enjoy them, you'll be happy. If you look for things to be depressed about, you'll find them too no matter how good your life is.
> 
> And now my little pity party/hissy fit is over and you can return to your usual DISsing



I would think the Airtran toddler would have pushed you over to our side for good. 

Seriously though, DH and I were fence sitters for a long time. I got off the pill when I was your age. Nothing happened. At 36 I had some minor surgery. We needed to decide just what we were going to do. Do everything possible to have a child or just not worry about it. We chose not to worrry about it. We could be happy just the 2 of us. We are now 47 and 48 and do not regret for a moment our decision. If we need a kid fix we have kids to go to for that. We have a dog and I give him my "mommy" love. That said we were probably always on the no kids side of the fence which made our decision alot easier.


----------



## scg73

It´s always great to go to WDW with NO KIDS! I hope to enjoy there if I have children someday too. But going just with my husband is just the best.


----------



## plgrn

Just back from our last trip to the world during our "Year of a Million Trips Annual Pass Spree." Goodbye Disney for at least a couple years.  

Saw 3 good parents the entire trip and about 60 bad ones. The rest were undeterminable.  Here's some of the hi-lites

1. On the crowded ferry boat from MGM to Boardwalk we were seated in the front row while a group of 3 kids were rough-housing all over our personal area. After about 5 minutes the dad had finally had enough and raised his voice to get their attention and tell them to settle down. It worked thank God, but then the mom immediately gets down on one knee and APOLOGIZES to the kids for raising her voice. First of all she didn't raise it too much because neither Mom or I remember hearing her. Secondly, where is the rule that you shouldn't raise your voice at your kids? Particularly if they are behaving like a tribe of natives and that's the only way to be heard above the ruckus. Morons 

2. Standing room only at midnight going back to POP from MK's extra magic hours...Mom (at 4'9") and me (at 5'2") are standing at the front of the bus barely behind the yellow line. Seated on the front row directly behind mom is a 3 year old and a 4 year old each with their own seats while their parents sit behind them and no move to put either of them in their laps despite the crowded conditions. Old ladies are having to stand and be thrown around on this bus while these kids have their own seats. Then the 4 year old has the audacity to turn to her mother and whine... "mommy this lady's leg (my mom's) is touching me." My mother whipped around, scowled at her and said "my leg's gotta go someplace kid!" Five minutes later the little girls fall asleep on each other. The parents are ooohing and ahhing and trying to get everyone nearby to look at "how cute they are! They fell asleep on each other! This is the first time they've ever done that!" Lady....you're kids are not cute in the least. In fact, they look about as cute as a pair of pterodactyls right now since they are the sole reason my midget mother and I are wedged under a tall guy's armpit. PUT THEM IN YOUR LAP. They are not the queens of the universe.

3. This takes the cake. At the petting zoo at Rafiki's they have a roped off area where the goats and sheep can go to get away from monster children. If they want to be petted or brushed they can come out of the area or stay along the edges, but that roped off area is supposed to be their refuge. As we're exiting the area I hear "Isabella! You may not go in there!" Which is a pretty dumb thing to say since they kid is already smack in the middle of the roped off area. "Isabella come here!" At this point the mother is screaming at her and causing a scene. Isabella is ignoring her of course since she knows there is nothing (e.g. a butt whooping) to back up her mother's screaming. Finally a poor cast member comes over and tries to get control of the situation by politely encouraging the little darling to come out. The cast member gets inside the roped off area and the little girl runs from her! The CM used this to her advantage by literally herding the vile creature towards her mother. The mother grabs her hand at which point the little girl lays on the ground and starts rolling around in the dirt and goat droppings. You have no idea how badly I wanted to grab a brush, start grooming her and then feed her some pellets. Maybe that would give the mother a clue that she has raised an animal and not a human being. Worse than an animal actually....the goats were better behaved and they were eating people's clothes!  

4. Then of course there's the usual bad behavior that isn't even winked at anymore because it's so common. A little girl was screaming and throwing everything in her stroller to the ground as hard as she could in order to get her way. Rosemary, you're baby doesn't belong anywhere this pure and magical. Take her to Universal Studios!   I believe the modern PC term for that now is "having a meltdown." A meltdown  If by meltdown you mean that's what happens to your @ss after you've thrown a fit then I'm all for the term!

These are the top four. Nevermind all the kids illegally wearing wheelies, speaking to their parents as if they were less than garbage, or invading the personal space of others for completely unnecessary reasons. Bring on the flames.


----------



## plgrn

This trip, I decided to seek our some good parenting, and believe me it was hard to find! In all fairness these parents and children do not deserve to be mentioned on the previous post. They get their own! 

1. During check-in at POP there was a little boy about 5 years old sitting on top of a suitcase who did not run around or open his mouth for a full 10 mintues. He sat there contentedly and looked around in awe of all the "eye candy" in the lobby while his parents checked in.  

2. While waiting in line at midnight to catch the bus back to POP (the same one which had the pterodactyls on it) there was a little girl about 7 or 8 who was sooo tired. Instead of whining or screaming, she layed her backpack down on the concrete and layed her head down on it until the bus got there. I know adults who don't have that much self-control! Kudos to her.  

3. At the Nine Dragons restaurant at EPCOT there was a little girl about 2 who sat in her high chair the entire meal without begging to get down or whining about anything. Furthermore, she allowed the 5 adults in her party to have dinner conversation with no interruption. She was happy to be in a new place and enjoying her meal.  

Those were the only particularly well-behaved children we saw on the trip. See lazy parent? It can be done! You just have to care more about your child than you do YOURSELF and your own comfort/convenience. Child training and discipline takes hard work which most parents nowadays are not willing to put forth.

I wish there was some sort of good parenting "winkie button" I could hand out when I see excellent parenting and well-behaved children. Both should be rewarded and sadly in our society they are not. The squeaky wheel gets the oil and that is why the insanity continues.


----------



## PghLybrt

plgrn said:


> 2. Standing room only at midnight going back to POP from MK's extra magic hours...Mom (at 4'9") and me (at 5'2") are standing at the front of the bus barely behind the yellow line. Seated on the front row directly behind mom is a 3 year old and a 4 year old each with their own seats while their parents sit behind them and no move to put either of them in their laps despite the crowded conditions. Old ladies are having to stand and be thrown around on this bus while these kids have their own seats. Then the 4 year old has the audacity to turn to her mother and whine... "mommy this lady's leg (my mom's) is touching me." My mother whipped around, scowled at her and said "my leg's gotta go someplace kid!" Five minutes later the little girls fall asleep on each other. The parents are ooohing and ahhing and trying to get everyone nearby to look at "how cute they are! They fell asleep on each other! This is the first time they've ever done that!" Lady....you're kids are not cute in the least. In fact, they look about as cute as a pair of pterodactyls right now since they are the sole reason my midget mother and I are wedged under a tall guy's armpit. PUT THEM IN YOUR LAP. They are not the queens of the universe.
> 
> Bring on the flames.




Ok the whole thing had me  

Now as for the whole bus thing, at least the parents were not yelling at you to be quite because their daughters were sleeping! (We seriously had that happen!)

Oh and no flames from me!


----------



## plgrn

PghLybrt said:


> Now as for the whole bus thing, at least the parents were not yelling at you to be quite because their daughters were sleeping! (We seriously had that happen!)




OMG! What did you do? I would have got thrown off the bus for eating them for breakfast.


----------



## PghLybrt

plgrn said:


> OMG! What did you do? I would have got thrown off the bus for eating them for breakfast.



Well we  (my girlfriend and I ) were with her little sister (by little I mean 24) and her parents.  Renee (the sister) does not take kindly to being told what to do especially when it is in public.  She went to town,. They thought she was loud before she was even more so after (and borderline vulgar.it made me smile   is that wrong?)

The worst part was that it was only around 8pm.  I wanted to give them money for a taxi.  Hell thats what we do after we are out drinking....we never get into a bus and expect people to  pander to us!


----------



## plgrn

PghLybrt said:


> .it made me smile   is that wrong?)



Nope! I would have laughed right along with you.


----------



## PghLybrt

plgrn said:


> Nope! I would have laughed right along with you.



Oh how I wish you were on that bus!


----------



## Hixski

We never ride the buses at Disney if we can avoid them. Of course we stay at BCV so that does help quite a bit. I don't have much tolerance to stand on my woefully cartilage challenged knees. I look fine so I know if I don't get a seat early I have to stand the whole way. DH has no tolerance for small kids in their own seat especially since he knows I can't stand for a long time. I have also had a few kicks in the knees by some of these little sweethearts. We just leave the busses to everyone else.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

plgrn said:


> 2. Standing room only at midnight going back to POP from MK's extra magic hours...Mom (at 4'9") and me (at 5'2") are standing at the front of the bus barely behind the yellow line. Seated on the front row directly behind mom is a 3 year old and a 4 year old each with their own seats while their parents sit behind them and no move to put either of them in their laps despite the crowded conditions. Old ladies are having to stand and be thrown around on this bus while these kids have their own seats.




I've seen threads on the DISboards re: WDW transportation where posters  INSIST that no women or children should have to stand on the buses, and that all adult men should stand and offer their seats to all women and children. It's ridiculous!

DH & I will offer our seats to elderly passengers and to people with very young kids who could not be expected to stand, but all women and children??  It is SO rude that the parents did not take their little kids into their laps and let you sit.


----------



## kennancat

Ok, this thread's gotten quiet again and I thought this would be good for a laugh. I was doing a google search on "meals eaten away from home" for replying to another thread when I came across this article: http://www.elliott.org/archives/000995kiddie_meals_re.php

Not too bad, except for a suggestion near the end:





> "Anticipate the cost of a someone else's child ruining your meal," [UCLA psychiatrist Mark Goulston] says. In addition to the common-sense steps, such as asking for another table or talking to the parents, he suggests that diners carry "little trinkets, toys or candies" with them to entice children to pipe down. "You'll win over the parent and the kid," he says.




Heck no, I am not carrying goodies for strangers' kids! If their parents haven't taught them proper manners and/or don't care to control them, how on earth is my rewarding the kids for misbehaving (since that's essentially what this would be) going to help them? I'll be happy to give away the toy from my happy meal at McDonald's, but I draw the line there!  I'm glad to see one of the responders to the article also thought this guy was off his rocker.


----------



## plgrn

That's nuts. Once again proof that children are taking over the world! Only because stupid parents let them of course.


----------



## PrincessSuzanne

kennancat said:


> Ok, this thread's gotten quiet again and I thought this would be good for a laugh. I was doing a google search on "meals eaten away from home" for replying to another thread when I came across this article: http://www.elliott.org/archives/000995kiddie_meals_re.php
> 
> Not too bad, except for a suggestion near the end:
> 
> Heck no, I am not carrying goodies for strangers' kids! If their parents haven't taught them proper manners and/or don't care to control them, how on earth is my rewarding the kids for misbehaving (since that's essentially what this would be) going to help them? I'll be happy to give away the toy from my happy meal at McDonald's, but I draw the line there!  I'm glad to see one of the responders to the article also thought this guy was off his rocker.




Maybe you could inject something into the goodies, then hand the out. 

Granted, I really want children, but there is no reason to let them get away with behaving this way. My mother or grandmother would have spanked me right there in the middle of the restaurant if I dared to misbehave. Parents don't even bother to try "training" their children anymore and it drives me absolutely nuts  

My cousin has three children and I won't go out to eat with her anywhere, because she lets them behave any way they want to and they drop food on the floor and it looks like animals from the zoo ate there. But you can't blame the children, because it is the parents that are at fault.

I think everyone should have to pass a test before they have children, and those that have unruly children should be beaten and made to eat the food off the floor. What is this world coming to.  

PrincessSuzanne


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## kennancat

PrincessSuzanne said:


> Maybe you could inject something into the goodies, then hand the out.


Ohhh, now there's a thought. Anybody know what they used to give B.A. on the A-Team before getting him on a plane?


----------



## LoveStitch626

This thread prompted me to join, so this is my first post here. 

DH & I are fence sitters as well. We got married in '01 and immediately started TTC. Well, we've got male factor infertility working against us so obviously nothing has happened kid wise. There are many days when I'd love to have our own kids. We've talked about it and decided if he can't get working correctly, that's going to be the end of it for us. There are other days when I'm perfectly content with our zoo and our child free lifestyle with all the free time and fun toys. 

That being said, I agree with everyone here about kids now being allowed to run free like wild animals. Heck, my saint bernard is more well behaved than most kids I see on a daily basis. I can't imagine getting away with acting like such a turd and getting away with it when I was growing up. 

Once a year, we take one of my oldest friend's 7 yr old daughter for about a week. She's like a niece to me. She knows she can't get away with much because I don't tolerate it..and she knows not to push very hard. She knows that if I've asked her what she wants for lunch, she'd better not throw a fit about it (or refuse to eat it) once it's prepared because I have no problem saying "OK cool" and sitting down to eat it myself after sending her to take her afternoon nap. That is one deal we've had. "I won't pester you about going to bed early as long as you've taken your nap kiddo..no nap no staying up late with us". She likes staying up with my DH playing video games like Haunted Mansion on the Gamecube. 

We've got a few friends with kids. There's one wife who never shuts up about her kids.. mainly her oldest. Now that she's pregnant with her third, we haven't exactly invited them to do much with us because I don't care to hear all the details. Goes back to that infertility problem. It seems now most of our friends have kids and it's hard for us to meet new friends let alone child free friends. About 90% of the people in our circle are people we've known since at least high school. New additions have come & gone but the main core group is still there. I highly doubt nokidding has anything in our area, but I plan on checking it out. 

Anyhow...


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> This thread prompted me to join, so this is my first post here.
> 
> DH & I are fence sitters as well. We got married in '01 and immediately started TTC. Well, we've got male factor infertility working against us so obviously nothing has happened kid wise. There are many days when I'd love to have our own kids. We've talked about it and decided if he can't get working correctly, that's going to be the end of it for us. There are other days when I'm perfectly content with our zoo and our child free lifestyle with all the free time and fun toys.
> 
> That being said, I agree with everyone here about kids now being allowed to run free like wild animals. Heck, my saint bernard is more well behaved than most kids I see on a daily basis. I can't imagine getting away with acting like such a turd and getting away with it when I was growing up.
> 
> Once a year, we take one of my oldest friend's 7 yr old daughter for about a week. She's like a niece to me. She knows she can't get away with much because I don't tolerate it..and she knows not to push very hard. She knows that if I've asked her what she wants for lunch, she'd better not throw a fit about it (or refuse to eat it) once it's prepared because I have no problem saying "OK cool" and sitting down to eat it myself after sending her to take her afternoon nap. That is one deal we've had. "I won't pester you about going to bed early as long as you've taken your nap kiddo..no nap no staying up late with us". She likes staying up with my DH playing video games like Haunted Mansion on the Gamecube.
> 
> We've got a few friends with kids. There's one wife who never shuts up about her kids.. mainly her oldest. Now that she's pregnant with her third, we haven't exactly invited them to do much with us because I don't care to hear all the details. Goes back to that infertility problem. It seems now most of our friends have kids and it's hard for us to meet new friends let alone child free friends. About 90% of the people in our circle are people we've known since at least high school. New additions have come & gone but the main core group is still there. I highly doubt nokidding has anything in our area, but I plan on checking it out.
> 
> Anyhow...



Welcome!


----------



## maddhatir

Just a quick- "yay! I dont have much responsibilities" story!

A friend of mine who has (2) boys (they are good kids) e-mailed me today to tell me of her hectic life- Her poor aging mother was in the hospital (her mother lives with her) my friends sister was then in the hospital and she had to go over there to take of her! and then her one soon kinda skateboarded off of the cement steps and cracked a rib or his head or something.

I know we all have families that need our help from time to time- but she has had it rough over the past few weeks- so she asked me what was going on in my life......I had to think long and hard and the only stressful thing I could think of was......

"Well I found a stray cat!"   I thought if that is the most stress I have in my life-- I am very thankful! If I had much more- I wouldnt be able to handle it!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Just a quick- "yay! I dont have much responsibilities" story!
> 
> A friend of mine who has (2) boys (they are good kids) e-mailed me today to tell me of her hectic life- Her poor aging mother was in the hospital (her mother lives with her) my friends sister was then in the hospital and she had to go over there to take of her! and then her one soon kinda skateboarded off of the cement steps and cracked a rib or his head or something.
> 
> I know we all have families that need our help from time to time- but she has had it rough over the past few weeks- so she asked me what was going on in my life......I had to think long and hard and the only stressful thing I could think of was......
> 
> "Well I found a stray cat!"   I thought if that is the most stress I have in my life-- I am very thankful! If I had much more- I wouldnt be able to handle it!



The only real stress I have right now is my brother being a butthead. He is 43 and lives at home with my mom and dad. No reason for it other than he is cheap and thinks the world revolves around him. He has decided that DH and I are the spawn of the devil and we need to grow up. This coming from a 43 yr old at home with mommy and daddy. He makes stuff up about us and my parents are starting to listen to him. Crazy situation. I think I would take a 5 yr old over a 43 yr old that acts 5.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Hixski said:


> The only real stress I have right now is my brother being a butthead. He is 43 and lives at home with my mom and dad. No reason for it other than he is cheap and thinks the world revolves around him. He has decided that DH and I are the spawn of the devil and we need to grow up. This coming from a 43 yr old at home with mommy and daddy. He makes stuff up about us and my parents are starting to listen to him. Crazy situation. I think I would take a 5 yr old over a 43 yr old that acts 5.



 Are you sure we're not related? Sounds like my family.


----------



## Hixski

LoveStitch626 said:


> Are you sure we're not related? Sounds like my family.



I wish I knew how to deal with it. My brother has always been a loner and things have always revolved around him. I could live with that but when my parents are acting like DH and I are the bad guys I'm lost. If anyone has any suggestions I am open. I don't care if my brother is mad. I am just upset I seem to be losing my parents too over my brothers craziness.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Hixski said:


> I wish I knew how to deal with it. My brother has always been a loner and things have always revolved around him. I could live with that but when my parents are acting like DH and I are the bad guys I'm lost. If anyone has any suggestions I am open. I don't care if my brother is mad. I am just upset I seem to be losing my parents too over my brothers craziness.



Honey I get ya 100000%. My sister is/was the exact same way. She's 13 yrs older than me, so when I came along it was just kind of screwed up HER plans.  My brother, being a couple yrs older than her and the only boy, always caught a bunch of poo from her as well. Growing up, I wasn't a bad kid. Sure my grades weren't top notch but I was far from being a BAD KID. Any minor thing I did, my sister blew way out of proportion and did the whispering in my mom's ear which just made everything a million times worse and I got in trouble worse. Ya I was on the phone while my parents were out and I was grounded. Sister came home unexpectedly. Big deal. My brother got pretty much the same treatment. She would play our parents against my brother & I. Well long story short, 2 things happened. Number 1- I learned how NOT to care what my sister said or did. I darn near severed all ties because I have no time for that drama and I don't need it. I dealt with it by NOT dealing with it because it wasn't my burden to carry anymore and I think that's a route you should consider. I'm grown now and married (while she's never going to get married or even find someone to love her because she's such a sad person) and she can't do much to affect my life anymore. She tried which brings us to Number 2- My brother's middle kid had some problems which nobody in the family was supposed to know of with the exception of our parents. My sister caught wind of it and told me. It wasn't the fact she told me that was bad, but who else did she tell in a "Guess what!" fashion. I kept my mouth shut about knowing because if they wanted it to be a secret, I was going to respect that until someone told me. Until my sister started acting up (I don't recall how) and my brother flat out asked me if she told me anything. My brother & I rekindled our relationship and I wasn't going to jeopardize that for my sister. He was always good to me where she never was. I told him what I knew. My sister tried to blame me and let me take the fall but my brother knew it wasn't me. My mom knew it wasn't me. It exposed her for what she was and what she'd been doing all these years and mom actually apologized for it all. 

Chances of your brother being exposed to your parents is probably slim to none unless he slips up like my sister. I'd suggest trying to cultivate a better relationship with your mom when you're brother's not around. Call her when you know she's free to talk. Call her every so often. Or your father depending on who rules the roost in your house and would most likely see the forest for the trees. I'd also suggest just NOT dealing with your brother. Bad poo like that has a way of affecting people and it just weighs you down. I know how ya feel though. Sometimes it takes things being totally shaken around for something good to happen in that sort of situation.  Hope this helps out some and wasn't too long winded. I tend to ramble around what my point is before I actually get to it. hehe


----------



## Hixski

LoveStitch626 said:


> Honey I get ya 100000%. My sister is/was the exact same way. She's 13 yrs older than me, so when I came along it was just kind of screwed up HER plans.  My brother, being a couple yrs older than her and the only boy, always caught a bunch of poo from her as well. Growing up, I wasn't a bad kid. Sure my grades weren't top notch but I was far from being a BAD KID. Any minor thing I did, my sister blew way out of proportion and did the whispering in my mom's ear which just made everything a million times worse and I got in trouble worse. Ya I was on the phone while my parents were out and I was grounded. Sister came home unexpectedly. Big deal. My brother got pretty much the same treatment. She would play our parents against my brother & I. Well long story short, 2 things happened. Number 1- I learned how NOT to care what my sister said or did. I darn near severed all ties because I have no time for that drama and I don't need it. I dealt with it by NOT dealing with it because it wasn't my burden to carry anymore and I think that's a route you should consider. I'm grown now and married (while she's never going to get married or even find someone to love her because she's such a sad person) and she can't do much to affect my life anymore. She tried which brings us to Number 2- My brother's middle kid had some problems which nobody in the family was supposed to know of with the exception of our parents. My sister caught wind of it and told me. It wasn't the fact she told me that was bad, but who else did she tell in a "Guess what!" fashion. I kept my mouth shut about knowing because if they wanted it to be a secret, I was going to respect that until someone told me. Until my sister started acting up (I don't recall how) and my brother flat out asked me if she told me anything. My brother & I rekindled our relationship and I wasn't going to jeopardize that for my sister. He was always good to me where she never was. I told him what I knew. My sister tried to blame me and let me take the fall but my brother knew it wasn't me. My mom knew it wasn't me. It exposed her for what she was and what she'd been doing all these years and mom actually apologized for it all.
> 
> Chances of your brother being exposed to your parents is probably slim to none unless he slips up like my sister. I'd suggest trying to cultivate a better relationship with your mom when you're brother's not around. Call her when you know she's free to talk. Call her every so often. Or your father depending on who rules the roost in your house and would most likely see the forest for the trees. I'd also suggest just NOT dealing with your brother. Bad poo like that has a way of affecting people and it just weighs you down. I know how ya feel though. Sometimes it takes things being totally shaken around for something good to happen in that sort of situation.  Hope this helps out some and wasn't too long winded. I tend to ramble around what my point is before I actually get to it. hehe



The main problem is my parents look at my brother as the "baby" still. I have just recently decided that DH does not exist and I will be cool and detached. If they think we are a problem to the "baby" then we won't be a problem anymore. I think not being around for awhile will shake my parents up a bit. DH does not deserve to be the bad guy when he hasn't done anything wrong. (OK, he can be a smart alleck, but who can't). DH has been around for 25 yrs. He was never a problem before. Like I said, just 

Sorry to get off track folks. Back to the married without children thread. Talking about the bratty kids is more fun than talking about my 43yr old bratty brother.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

You should try teaching.  It absolutely blows my mind when parents ask me for parenting advice.  Let's see, I have no children of my own and you want my advice?  Parent response: But he's so good at school!  Yeah, that's because at school we have rules with real consequences.  Kick and scream all you want kid because in the end you will do it my way.   

My personal favorite are the parents that tell my that I am hurting their child's self-esteem and emotional development by enforcing the rules!!  I tell them "well, that is actually a standard in the state of Florida for Social Studies."  There is no dealing with these kind of parents.  

A little off-topic here but DH and I were considering having kids and somehow that got spread around to being that I was pregnant.  What did the parents do?  Complain that a preganat teacher would be confusing to their child and that I shouldn't be allowed to teach!  In fact I actually got a few angry notes form parents that I was letting them down!!  Augh!  The nerve!!      I really wanted to say that I wasn't sure of the father before clearing up the misunderstanding.


----------



## Hixski

Mrs.Reese said:


> You should try teaching.  It absolutely blows my mind when parents ask me for parenting advice.  Let's see, I have no children of my own and you want my advice?  Parent response: But he's so good at school!  Yeah, that's because at school we have rules with real consequences.  Kick and scream all you want kid because in the end you will do it my way.
> 
> My personal favorite are the parents that tell my that I am hurting their child's self-esteem and emotional development by enforcing the rules!!  I tell them "well, that is actually a standard in the state of Florida for Social Studies."  There is no dealing with these kind of parents.
> 
> A little off-topic here but DH and I were considering having kids and somehow that got spread around to being that I was pregnant.  What did the parents do?  Complain that a preganat teacher would be confusing to their child and that I shouldn't be allowed to teach!  In fact I actually got a few angry notes form parents that I was letting them down!!  Augh!  The nerve!!      I really wanted to say that I wasn't sure of the father before clearing up the misunderstanding.



See what having children does to people. It makes them crazy.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> The only real stress I have right now is my brother being a butthead. He is 43 and lives at home with my mom and dad. No reason for it other than he is cheap and thinks the world revolves around him. He has decided that DH and I are the spawn of the devil and we need to grow up. This coming from a 43 yr old at home with mommy and daddy. He makes stuff up about us and my parents are starting to listen to him. Crazy situation. I think I would take a 5 yr old over a 43 yr old that acts 5.



OMG!!!! I never really wanted to get into it- but that is a MAJOR problem in my life-- I try and block it out or else I would be in the looney bin though!

My brother is 38- lives with my mother, verbally abuses her, has never had a job, thinks the world revolves around him and has a few mental problems (can ya tell!) and wont admit to any of them!- My father spolied him rotten when we were kids, would never admit HIS son had any problems, dad passed away, and has left the monster for mom to deal with!

My major concern is for my mother- I can care less about him.


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> OMG!!!! I never really wanted to get into it- but that is a MAJOR problem in my life-- I try and block it out or else I would be in the looney bin though!
> 
> My brother is 38- lives with my mother, verbally abuses her, has never had a job, thinks the world revolves around him and has a few mental problems (can ya tell!) and wont admit to any of them!- My father spolied him rotten when we were kids, would never admit HIS son had any problems, dad passed away, and has left the monster for mom to deal with!
> 
> My major concern is for my mother- I can care less about him.



What is scary is that there seems to be quite a few boys posing as men out there. My brother has a decent job. How else could he have about half a million in the bank. I think my brother has a personality disorder but my parents think DH and I are the ones in the wrong. I am going to block it out or DH will put me in that looney bin. He has been very supportive for someone who is supposed to be the spawn of the devil.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Hixski said:


> I am going to block it out or DH will put me in that looney bin. He has been very supportive for someone who is supposed to be the spawn of the devil.



LOL what else can ya do? I think your decision is a smart one. YOU know dh & you aren't the devil... bugger on anyone else who thinks otherwise.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> What is scary is that there seems to be quite a few boys posing as men out there. My brother has a decent job. How else could he have about half a million in the bank. I think my brother has a personality disorder but my parents think DH and I are the ones in the wrong. I am going to block it out or DH will put me in that looney bin. He has been very supportive for someone who is supposed to be the spawn of the devil.



I WISH my brother had a job and stop sponging off of my mother- she is 66 and supposed to be enjoying her life. But she has to deal with him everyday- he actually THINKS she should support him- he thinks there is nothing wrong there- now if that is not a mental problem- I dont know what is?

My Mother (besides my DH) is the most important thing in my life...and she knows it-- we have a great relationship- she knows my brother is the spawn of the devil....well, actually the devil himself! 

This isnt really OT- all of this stems from oblivious parents (just like my dad!)-and parents like those out there today- who think "not MY child" or "cut the kid some slack" well- this is what you get when you think that way!

SO! Stop letting the kids rule the roost and give them some stinkin' disipline! OR open your eyes-- b/c yes your kid is the little monster that everyone thinks he is- and he is only going to be a bigger one- just give him some time...oh yeah- thats right.....and some slack!


----------



## HockeyKat

Okay, I think I have found home.

DH and I have been married for almost 2 years now.  I am 31, he is 36.  I have never wanted children, and I still don't.  DH is even more adamant than I.  And oh, the questions.  I am a very forceful person and pretty much just tell people to shut up.  My latest tactic is to say, "You wouldn't want to see the spawn that we would produce" or "I pity the poor child that would have us for parents" and that usually produces a laugh and they drop the subject.  If they continue, I say, well, I just don't want a child, and don't you think a child should feel wanted?

We love our childless life.  We do pretty well, and have all the toys we could want.  We just bought into DVC (waiting for ROFR on our resale!), since DH talked me into a WDW trip in September and I am totally, 100% hooked.  I just don't feel the parental urge.  I can see a child doing something cute and think awww, but I just don't want my own.  

And I soooo hear you on the sibling thing!  I have an older brother who can do no wrong.  He has unfortunately spawned, two very pretty overpriviledged children who will never see the right side of discipline in their lives.   We have limited our contact to as brief a time as we can on the holidays as to not seem as though we hate them.  DH works in the retail industry so we use that as an excuse!   

I also completely understand the friends problem.  We have reached the age where almost everyone is either hopelessly single or married and pregnant/young kids.  Our last set of couple friends is due in July.  So, we will be doing lots of stuff together!!  We are hoping by our 40s that most people will have older kids and will re-join an adult-oriented life.

It's strange... my parents had me when they were older (37/38), and they retained an adult life.  They would have date night once a week, and get together with a group of other couples (some childless, some not) once a month.  We got sent to sitters all the time.  It just doesn't seem like people really do that anymore.

-Kat


----------



## maddhatir

HockeyKat said:


> Okay, I think I have found home.
> 
> DH and I have been married for almost 2 years now.  I am 31, he is 36.  I have never wanted children, and I still don't.  DH is even more adamant than I.  And oh, the questions.  I am a very forceful person and pretty much just tell people to shut up.  My latest tactic is to say, "You wouldn't want to see the spawn that we would produce" or "I pity the poor child that would have us for parents" and that usually produces a laugh and they drop the subject.  If they continue, I say, well, I just don't want a child, and don't you think a child should feel wanted?
> 
> We love our childless life.  We do pretty well, and have all the toys we could want.  We just bought into DVC (waiting for ROFR on our resale!), since DH talked me into a WDW trip in September and I am totally, 100% hooked.  I just don't feel the parental urge.  I can see a child doing something cute and think awww, but I just don't want my own.
> 
> And I soooo hear you on the sibling thing!  I have an older brother who can do no wrong.  He has unfortunately spawned, two very pretty overpriviledged children who will never see the right side of discipline in their lives.   We have limited our contact to as brief a time as we can on the holidays as to not seem as though we hate them.  DH works in the retail industry so we use that as an excuse!
> 
> I also completely understand the friends problem.  We have reached the age where almost everyone is either hopelessly single or married and pregnant/young kids.  Our last set of couple friends is due in July.  So, we will be doing lots of stuff together!!  We are hoping by our 40s that most people will have older kids and will re-join an adult-oriented life.
> 
> It's strange... my parents had me when they were older (37/38), and they retained an adult life.  They would have date night once a week, and get together with a group of other couples (some childless, some not) once a month.  We got sent to sitters all the time.  It just doesn't seem like people really do that anymore.
> 
> -Kat



Welcome home Kat!

We used to get a lot of -people with kids- over here starting up on us- but that seemed to cool down a lot!

I think b/c someone here questioned them as to why they are hanging out on "our" thread, giving us grief- when we dont go over to the "family" thread and invade their space! 

Oh by the way- my stray kitty - I found him a home(thank you fellow DISer and my Wench friend rhiannonwales)- So i dont have a lot on my plate right now!


----------



## HockeyKat

Thanks for the welcome!  

I read through some of this thread before posting, although I don't have the 3 days needed to read through all of it!!

I just don't understand why people with kids feel the need to guilt trip you into thinking you should have them.  I understand that for them it may be the "greatest thing ever" but not everyone is made alike.  

I am not really a "typical" girl anyhow, though... work writing software, love hockey and beer and tech toys, hate pink, only have enough shoes to get by.  So I leave a lot of mommy-types baffled, most of the time.  This likely contributes to my inability to find girlfriends or keep them once they turn into breeders.

-Kat


----------



## maddhatir

HockeyKat said:


> Thanks for the welcome!
> 
> I read through some of this thread before posting, although I don't have the 3 days needed to read through all of it!!
> 
> I just don't understand why people with kids feel the need to guilt trip you into thinking you should have them.  I understand that for them it may be the "greatest thing ever" but not everyone is made alike.
> 
> I am not really a "typical" girl anyhow, though... work writing software, love hockey and beer and tech toys, hate pink, only have enough shoes to get by.  So I leave a lot of mommy-types baffled, most of the time.  This likely contributes to my inability to find girlfriends or keep them once they turn into breeders.
> 
> -Kat



It is getting better for DH and I- we are getting older (40 and 42 --mentally 30) and some our friends with kids are able to come out and play a bit more than before b/c their kids are getting older!
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




On Friday night we just hung out with a friend of mine that I have known since I was 5- her boys are 16 and 12 now- I just e-mailed her to tell her we have to do it again b/c we had so much fun!


----------



## Hixski

HockeyKat said:


> Thanks for the welcome!
> 
> I read through some of this thread before posting, although I don't have the 3 days needed to read through all of it!!
> 
> I just don't understand why people with kids feel the need to guilt trip you into thinking you should have them.  I understand that for them it may be the "greatest thing ever" but not everyone is made alike.
> 
> I am not really a "typical" girl anyhow, though... work writing software, love hockey and beer and tech toys, hate pink, only have enough shoes to get by.  So I leave a lot of mommy-types baffled, most of the time.  This likely contributes to my inability to find girlfriends or keep them once they turn into breeders.
> 
> -Kat



I am another one that was never a girly girl. My mom wanted a pink dress wearing princess. She got an athletic tomboy who hated dresses and does not own the color pink. (I do have a hot pink summer top but don't tell anyone). I look like a girl or in my case woman (I am 47) with long reddish blonde hair. If I could wear flip flops and shorts year round that would be me. I work in IT, love beer, hang out with the boys when it comes to sports. I have girlfriends but to them I am more of a free spirit. 

It gets easier when you get older. The friends with children will start going out more as the kids get older. The people that want you to be a breeder start shutting up after you hit 40. It will take awhile but they will leave you alone. We have even had people tell us that wouldn't give up their kids for anything but........if they had it to do over they don't know if they would.


----------



## goofie4goofy

Hey Hockeykat!  I feel your pain  my mother is always telling me that my brother and his wife "do everything right".  My husband and I do not have kids and do not plan to = so I guess we do everything "wrong".  Because we do not have the responsibility of children we live a very different life than most people.  We were able to take a different path financially by being able to take certain risks and they paid off......something we most certainly could not have done with children.  We love our life and don't give a rat's hairy what people think.  We do have our own business and we don't go to "work a day jobs" anymore, so that in itself bothers many people around us.  Not everyone is "parent material"  I think that is why there are so many crappy kids in the world.  People think that it's just the thing you do without giving thought to the responsibility of a lifetime involved.  It's not that I don't like kids, I do -- I just don't want to be a parent.  We have had neighbors and friends ask us questions that would make your hair stand on end.  I find this very strange but I have found the more successful you become, the more people have a problem with it.  Our married with kids friends do not bother with us very much anymore, with the exception of birthdays and other milestone events, which is sad. They make us feel like we don't fit in and I have left a few events early in tears.  To be honest, I am tired of the comments...."must be nice"   "I want to do what you do"  "life is tough"  "you have it easy I have 2 kids"....We did not win a lottery, we work hard and we gave up a lot to have what we do. We wanted a different life, but it does not mean we ARE different.   Will we regret in time that we did not have kids...who knows.  I do know there are very few people who would have the guts to sacrifice what we did to make it happen.  So for all the people with a "normal life" who "do everything right"  there are some people who feel fufilled in other ways besides raising children. We never ever brag, never tell anyone our business and are always very generous with friends and family, and still people pass comments.  

I feel better now.....I have been keeping that in for a while!! Thanks


----------



## HockeyKat

Thanks for sharing, and congratulations on doing exactly what you want to do, and having a wonderful life because of it!!  I truly mean that.  I think that your friends and family are probably jealous.   I know I would be!  It takes a lot of courage to do what you truly love and want, and not everyone has that.  Some are honest enough to admit the jealousy yet still wish you well, and others couch it in rationalizations about their own life and how it is so much better than yours.

I have to admit... I don't like children.  Not at all.  One-on-one, some of them are okay, and some are occasionally cute, but I vastly prefer the company of adults.   

I do leave my dislike of kids at home when I go to WDW.   Well, of well-behaved kids and/or good parents (hubby says there are no bad kids, just bad parents).  I still dislike bad parents, especially with killer strollers.

-Kat


----------



## maddhatir

Other people's kids are OK- if they are good. I don't mind talking to them etc- some of them are cute...and funny...and behaved. When I like your kids- I will tell you just how cute and well behaved they are, I will ask about them- I even go as far as saying you did a great job as parents! I have to tell some parents that only b/c they are few and far between! Most parents are used to getting the "eye roll" from people b/c their kids are monsters! So I feel I need to tell the parents who seem to be doing a good job! 

But when they are brats- forget about it-- I do not want to know you! 



goofie4goofy said:


> To be honest, I am tired of the comments...."must be nice"   "I want to do what you do"  "life is tough"  "you have it easy I have 2 kids"....


I know what you mean-- Don't you just want to scream-- "HEY! I CHOSE not to have kids"-- sorry you feel like you made the wrong decision- don't take it out on me! I believe they are, indeed, jealous when they make those comments- what else could it be- they want you to feel sorry for them ....but, SORRY! Isn't gonna happen


----------



## kennancat

goofie4goofy said:


> I am tired of the comments...."must be nice"


Just smile, nod, and say "yes, it is!"


----------



## Ragetti

I love being a Dad.  There is magic in the eyes of a little girl.  But however I feel about the expereince, the decision to have kids or not is personal. No one has the right to question your choice.

And frankly, if you don't WANT to be a parent, then becoming one is risky... for you AND the kid.


----------



## LoveStitch626

We actually got our first "so when" comment this weekend. Well DH did..I wasn't there. We'd been lucky up to this point really. I think dh handled it very well. The convo sort of went like this "So when are you going to have babies?" "I have a baby" "When?!?!" "Ya he's 2.5 & 200lbs & furry all over" "No man, babies, real babies" "He is my baby" The other guy kind of rolled his eyes and walked off.


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> When I like your kids- I will tell you just how cute and well behaved they are, I will ask about them- I even go as far as saying you did a great job as parents! I have to tell some parents that only b/c they are few and far between! Most parents are used to getting the "eye roll" from people b/c their kids are monsters! So I feel I need to tell the parents who seem to be doing a good job!


You all should check out the "surprising experience at Victoria & Albert's" thread - apparently a couple of parents feel this is condescending. I'm so tempted to ask if anybody's ever complimented their kids' behavior!


----------



## mhf

Hixski said:


> I am another one that was never a girly girl. My mom wanted a pink dress wearing princess. She got an athletic tomboy who hated dresses and does not own the color pink. (I do have a hot pink summer top but don't tell anyone). I look like a girl or in my case woman (I am 47) with long reddish blonde hair. If I could wear flip flops and shorts year round that would be me. I work in IT, love beer, hang out with the boys when it comes to sports. I have girlfriends but to them I am more of a free spirit.



But I am a girly girl  Love dresses, princess, jewelry, choclate.  But I think they left the mom gene out of me. Maybe I was shopping.   

Thank goodness I found DH.  They left the dad gene out of him.

My 11 year old neices came to visit last weekend...fun...for 2 days. Then time for them to go back to dad   

Melissa

PS it's snowing here


----------



## LoveStitch626

Hixski said:


> I am another one that was never a girly girl. My mom wanted a pink dress wearing princess.



I gave up on dresses. When I wear them I feel like Marla from League of their Own. Gracefully & Grandfully...


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:


> I am another one that was never a girly girl. My mom wanted a pink dress wearing princess.


This is another reason I'm afraid to have kids - I'm not a girly girl and I figure it would be an excellent cosmic joke if I ended up with a daughter who was! "No honey, put the barbies down - look, I got you legos!"


----------



## maddhatir

mhf said:


> But I am a girly girl  Love dresses, princess, jewelry, choclate.  But I think they left the mom gene out of me. Maybe I was shopping.
> 
> Thank goodness I found DH.  They left the dad gene out of him.
> 
> My 11 year old neices came to visit last weekend...fun...for 2 days. Then time for them to go back to dad
> 
> Melissa
> 
> PS it's snowing here



Me too! I am totally a girlie girl! The part about the shopping-  I sure did get THAT gene from mom!!! She taught me well! 

I have a 5yr old major princess niece, a 7 moth old niece- who will, I am certain be another princess and 2 nephews- I love to see them- and that is my kid quota-- and the "quota feeling" can last up to 1 full month! 

and PS! Its snowing here too!


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> This is another reason I'm afraid to have kids - I'm not a girly girl and I figure it would be an excellent cosmic joke if I ended up with a daughter who was! "No honey, put the barbies down - look, I got you legos!"



Well my SIL was a jock in highschool, played field hockey etc, doesnt wear make up- never worries about her hair and her daughter is SUCH a girlie girl that she is now 5 and she just recently would allow her mother to put a pair of pants on her! and that is only b/c one of her little fiends wears pants. If its not pink- forget it!

She always talks about being an actess and she is only 5- she would like to be an "actress" in Disney she tells us. 

My niece is always worried about her hair- she makes an outfit change at least 3 times during that day- one day it was maye 40 degrees out- and she came outside in a flowey nighgown- her cha cha glass heels with fuzzy feathery things on them- her poodle handbag and was running around the yard! 

She got mad at someone while she was out there and went stomping off- can I tell you how funny this little kid looked like all dressed up like that stomping off- it would not have been funny at all if she wa snot dressed like that- I told SIL- you see that right there-- that is going to be her when she is 21 and a guy wont buy her a diamond-- or a new car or something! She is going to still be dressing like that at 21!

My SIL deals with it-- but doesnt understand it at all- how she had it in her to be so girlie b/c she didnt get it from her mommy!


----------



## TKDisneylover

goofie4goofy said:


> I think that is why there are so many crappy kids in the world.  People think that it's just the thing you do without giving thought to the responsibility of a lifetime involved.



AMEN to that!!

I work at Social Services receiving police reports on juvenile delinquents & assigning them to a social worker.  It's amazing how many times a social worker will meet with a family and they want the worker to "fix" their kid and take no responsibility.  Or the other extreme, persons having unprotected relations and having kids they don't want and they end up getting shipped off to foster care.  Sheesh! 

DH & I are 42 & 43 and have been together since high school.  We dated/lived together for 6 years before we married.  We told everyone plain & simply there would be no kids!  We truly enjoy being the adult kids that we are! 

Have a magical day everyone!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> AMEN to that!!
> 
> I work at Social Services receiving police reports on juvenile delinquents & assigning them to a social worker.  It's amazing how many times a social worker will meet with a family and they want the worker to "fix" their kid and take no responsibility.  Or the other extreme, persons having unprotected relations and having kids they don't want and they end up getting shipped off to foster care.  Sheesh!
> 
> DH & I are 42 & 43 and have been together since high school.  We dated/lived together for 6 years before we married.  We told everyone plain & simply there would be no kids!  We truly enjoy being the adult kids that we are!
> 
> Have a magical day everyone!



DH and I are 40 and 42- been together since high school- lived together for 13 years before getting married- we also told everyone no kids for us!

I was just in the grocery store yesterday and a woman was in front of me checking out and she had a daughter about 8 with her. The woman started commenting on "dont have kids" to the male cashier and asked him if he wanted kids- he said eventually- she then looked at me- and I had to chime in and say- I never wanted them- and dont have them!

I was walking out to the parking lot and realized- man! It seems like 99% of the people you see are breeders! It is unbelieveable how many people seem they feel the need to follow the herd and breed! 

I FEEL so lucky I can think for myself and not feel I need to "fit in" with the rest of the this wacked out world! 

And WHY is it when some breeders comment about "dont have kids" they have to throw in-- I love my kids, but if I could do it all over again-I might do it differently


----------



## momtoBrandon&Jacob

maddhatir said:


> DH and I are 40 and 42- been together since high school- lived together for 13 years before getting married- we also told everyone no kids for us!
> 
> I was just in the grocery store yesterday and a woman was in front of me checking out and she had a daughter about 8 with her. The woman started commenting on "dont have kids" to the male cashier and asked him if he wanted kids- he said eventually- she then looked at me- and I had to chime in and say- I never wanted them- and dont have them!
> 
> I was walking out to the parking lot and realized- man! It seems like 99% of the people you see are breeders! It is unbelieveable how many people seem they feel the need to follow the herd and breed!
> 
> I FEEL so lucky I can think for myself and not feel I need to "fit in" with the rest of the this wacked out world!
> 
> And WHY is it when some breeders comment about "dont have kids" they have to throw in-- I love my kids, but if I could do it all over again-I might do it differently



Well, after reading your post it is definetely a good thing that you will not reproduce!


----------



## hollyb

TKDisneylover said:


> AMEN to that!!
> 
> I work at Social Services receiving police reports on juvenile delinquents & assigning them to a social worker.  It's amazing how many times a social worker will meet with a family and they want the worker to "fix" their kid and take no responsibility.  Or the other extreme, persons having unprotected relations and having kids they don't want and they end up getting shipped off to foster care.  Sheesh!
> 
> DH & I are 42 & 43 and have been together since high school.  We dated/lived together for 6 years before we married.  We told everyone plain & simply there would be no kids!  We truly enjoy being the adult kids that we are!
> 
> Have a magical day everyone!




Your not even a mom and you think you know what is best for kids. What a JOKE!!!! Your better off getting a job washing dishes. Until your a mom you have no clue.


----------



## momof3littlelilos

maddhatir said:


> I was walking out to the parking lot and realized- man! It seems like 99% of the people you see are breeders! It is unbelieveable how many people seem they feel the need to follow the herd and breed!
> 
> I FEEL so lucky I can think for myself and not feel I need to "fit in" with the rest of the this wacked out world!
> 
> And WHY is it when some breeders comment about "dont have kids" they have to throw in-- I love my kids, but if I could do it all over again-I might do it differently



HI! I'm a mom...and although I find the tone sort of argumentative I'll bite...I'm a breeder but I'm not a herd girl...I'm a grouchy hermit maybe, but definately too odd and cranky for the "herd" ...I was born to people who, IMHO, had us without putting much thought into it, they just did what was expected of them and then spent their lives resenting it. I always thought being in a family could be fun, even though my childhood wasn't...now I've got a family, and I try to be mindful about it and we have fun and are happy - tantrums, poopy diapers and all.
But, part of being mindful means you have to realize what you're missing and/or what you gave up for what you have. In retrospect maybe I should've finished college first, or established a career, or traveled more, or had a few more youthful indescretions or...whatever....I don't see how it's confusing...there's always _something_ someone could have done differently. I don't think you're being honest with yourself if you can't find something in your life you might have done differently if given the opportunity.
If you really don't want children that's great if your life makes you happy...what I find confusing is people feeling like they have to justify their choices either way.

BTW - we're surrounded by crappy kids, and wonder constantly: "what we're _those_ people thinking when they had kids?"  That thought isn't exclusive to the childless!


----------



## momof3littlelilos

ps - I jumped into this thread accidentally - I was about to click into "Disney For Families" just above this...oops...breeding destroys brain cells, I swear it does


----------



## kennancat

staceyshearrion said:


> HI! I'm a mom...and although I find the tone sort of argumentative I'll bite...I'm a breeder but I'm not a herd girl


BTW, it sounds like you're a parent, not a "breeder". I've typically heard that term applied to people who have kids without thinking and then expect society/the government/the schools/i.e. someone else to raise them!


----------



## kennancat

hollyb said:


> Your not even a mom and you think you know what is best for kids. What a JOKE!!!! Your better off getting a job washing dishes. Until your a mom you have no clue.


<Insert Poltergeist music in the background>

She's backkkkk......

And still hasn't learned proper grammar


----------



## momof3littlelilos

kennancat said:


> BTW, it sounds like you're a parent, not a "breeder". I've typically heard that term applied to people who have kids without thinking and then expect society/the government/the schools/i.e. someone else to raise them!



I guess it depends who's using the term. I've been applying it to myself since...a long long time ago when I was still in college raising my son and working in the LGBT Student Center...where I was (I hope) lovingly referred to as "the breeder".


----------



## LoveStitch626

staceyshearrion said:


> I guess it depends who's using the term. I've been applying it to myself since...a long long time ago when I was still in college raising my son and working in the LGBT Student Center...where I was (I hope) lovingly referred to as "the breeder".



Personally I hate using the term breeder unless it's really appropriate because I've had it applied to me.. yes me... with no kids. I had a friend up until recently (now ex friend) who happened to be gay. He called ***everyone*** who was straight a breeder. That made me see red because this guy was my best friend. He *knew* we couldn't have kids unless we paid out the nose for doctors yet he did it anyway. I didn't think a friend could be so callous.


----------



## maddhatir

momtoBrandon&Jacob said:


> Well, after reading your post it is definetely a good thing that you will not reproduce!




Well I SEE we have one of "those" breeders that found its way to OUR board!

Its been quite some time since we had one!


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> <Insert Poltergeist music in the background>
> 
> She's backkkkk......
> 
> And still hasn't learned proper grammar



And I think it brought a friend!


----------



## plgrn

hollyb said:


> Until your a mom you have no clue.




You're not even a human being for that matter! Now go get knocked up and fullfil your purpose in life!


----------



## plgrn

kennancat said:


> And still hasn't learned proper grammar



"Your" right on!


----------



## HockeyKat




----------



## maddhatir

Just a random thought....  

I find it terrifying that unstable people can procreate.......


----------



## Mrs.Reese

maddhatir said:


> Just a random thought....
> 
> I find it terrifying that unstable people can procreate.......



Yes and they are pretty much always the ones with four kids..... Don't worry they'll be in my classroom in  a few years and I'll have to "fix" them.


----------



## ChisJo

I have always said that I would never have kids. I don't want them, I don't really like being around them for long periods. I have 9 neices and nephews, and 4 god sons. I love being able to give them back at the end of the day. I work as an RN in Pediatrics, and love coming home to a relaxed environment. Granted, I work in an area where every child I come into contact with is incredibly sick....some cases terribly sick. That is in itself, my form of birth control. Do I hate kids? No. Am I a terrible person because I don't believe that every person in the world should create children? No. I think it is a personal opinion - plain and simple. Some people believe that just because you are in a relationship, married, or living together, you have a rightful duty to bring a child into this world. I am SO sick and tired of telling people that I am not and will not have kids simply out of "duty" to my relationship. My boyfriend and myself both know how the other feels and are content knowing that we will be childless. 

That being said, we understand that we have goals and dreams in our lives that do not include children. For instance, I would love to utilize  my degree and travel and do volunteer work. With children, this would not be as easy, especially in some of the countries that I want to go to. Yet, some people still insist that I need to have children to visit me when I am old. I don't know what I have to do or say to these people anymore. Just the other day, I literally got into a disagreement with a man at work because he said where he comes from, it is expected that people have children. I told him it wasn't that way here....yet he insisted that I will one day regret my decision. Again, I cannot stress how sick and tired I am of hearing these comments, like I am some kind of freak living in this world and not wanting children.

All I have to say is....if you love your children, that's great. If you cannot understand why someone wouldn't want a couple bundles of joy, then try to see it from our perspective....we wonder why you want to have multiple bundles of joy. If you are happy with them, great....but don't assume that everyone else in the world would be.


----------



## maddhatir

Mrs.Reese said:


> Yes and they are pretty much always the ones with four kids..... Don't worry they'll be in my classroom in  a few years and I'll have to "fix" them.




I can see it now-- "ummmm excuse me, childless (and happy, stable) teacher- can you please help me fix my kid that I screwed up? Oh- me? Yes I know I am the parent, but its either you- or maybe I should call Nanny Deb, how about Jo? I see them on TV sometimes"


----------



## ChisJo

maddhatir said:


> I can see it now-- "ummmm excuse me, childless (and happy, stable) teacher- can you please help me fix my kid that I screwed up? Oh- me? Yes I know I am the parent, but its either you- or maybe I should call Nanny Deb, how about Jo? I see them on TV sometimes"



OMG!! Have you met my sister???


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> OMG!! Have you met my sister???



Is she posting on this board???


----------



## plgrn

ChisJo said:


> I have always said that I would never have kids.




Ahhh, but what if Spiderman comes along?


----------



## maddhatir

Hey CrisJo-- don't you come on this board and pretend like you don't want kids--- You want _*Spiderman's*_ babies! 

But I don't think that would count-- b/c that would be kind of cool if your kid can shoot a web from his wrist and climb up a building- everyday would be an adventure!


----------



## plgrn

Sorry for all the one-liners guys. I am in an incredibly good/silly mood. The trolls are not getting me down!  

Can't think of anything deep and awe-inspiring to add though so I'll go back to watching.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Ahhh, but what if Spiderman comes along?



We must think alike-- and at the same time!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Sorry for all the one-liners guys. I am in an incredibly good/silly mood. The trolls are not getting me down!
> 
> Can't think of anything deep and awe-inspiring to add though so I'll go back to watching.



Sometimes awe-inspiring can be boring- Silly is good!


----------



## momof3littlelilos

ChisJo said:


> Yet, some people still insist that I need to have children to visit me when I am old. I don't know what I have to do or say to these people anymore.
> All I have to say is....if you love your children, that's great. If you cannot understand why someone wouldn't want a couple bundles of joy, then try to see it from our perspective....we wonder why you want to have multiple bundles of joy. If you are happy with them, great....but don't assume that everyone else in the world would be.



To the first part - there are lots of elderly moms and dads who sit alone day after day in the nursing home...just remind people of that. Having kids is no guarantee that anybody will take care of you or visit you when you're old and lonely...


----------



## plgrn

Ok I lied. I do have something valuable to share. Anyone every visited Rockin' Childfree? I wouldn't post some of her comments on here since 1.they would be a troll magnet 2.The language filter would cut out 1/4 of the post!

Her thoughts are over-the-top, judgmental, callous, and downright anti-family.   I don't agree with a lot of things, but love her rants anyway!

ChrisJo, if you are feeling like a freak, check it out!

http://www.freewebs.com/rockincf2/index.htm


----------



## Hixski

Wow, I am off for a few hours and the "enlightened ones" come back. 
It is amazing we have all gotten this far in life not having children. We are going to regret our decision, our lives are miserable....blah...blah....blah.

OT: Here is my fuzzy baby running around outside today in the snow. I hate snow but he loves it.


----------



## plgrn

Hixski said:


> OT: Here is my fuzzy baby running around outside today in the snow. I hate snow but he loves it.



What a sweetie! Our 2.5 year-old dog saw snow for the first time last week and didn't know what to think. He didn't like the way it felt on his paws and that was pretty funny to watch. He's a Southern dog for sure.


----------



## maddhatir

NOW! Animals are a whole other subject- I have allergies and asthma and my heart ACHES for a pet, which I can not have-- I love animals so much that they are the reason I became a vegetarian! Amazing- how I can ache to want a pet but not a child! 

When I look into an animlas eyes- I just melt!~

Hixski your pup is so cute!

Actually about 2 weeks ago a stray kitty foound his way to me (he can sense -stray animal sucker- I guess!) I took care of him until last week when I found a home for him with one of my DIS "wench" friends- We both traveled an hour on the NJ Turnpike (we live about 2 hours or more from eahc other!)and met each other half way so we can meet and give the kitty a home!

He is now warm and cozy and in a loving home!


----------



## Hixski

Thanks for thinking my baby Duncan is a cutie. Mommy certainly thinks so. Believe it or not but he is really my old man. He will be 10 in June. He is in great shape. I hope he stays that way for a long time.

Maddhatir: I don't know how severe your allergies are but my cousin has asthma and allergies too. She has always had a dog. She has a terrier mutt now. She has to take medicine for both conditions and it is enough to allow her a dog. It might not be hopeless.


----------



## plgrn

One of my good friends is an animal lover and is allergic to everything that moves. She wound up getting two pet rats...yes....rats. They are extremely clean and smart believe it or not. She got them from a breeder so they would be properly socialized. I don't know if I could handle rats, but she loves them! They even know their names.


----------



## kennancat

TKDisneylover said:


> I work at Social Services receiving police reports on juvenile delinquents & assigning them to a social worker.  It's amazing how many times a social worker will meet with a family and they want the worker to "fix" their kid and take no responsibility.  Or the other extreme, persons having unprotected relations and having kids they don't want and they end up getting shipped off to foster care.  Sheesh!


Tammy - just wanted to say welcome to the thread. Sorry the trolls woke up for your arrival  Your job sounds like it must be really tough at times - I'm glad there are people like you doing their best to help!


----------



## TXTurtle

Another Childless-by-choice person here!  I've just never wanted kids, despite being an in-demand babysitter throughout HS and involved with them through church in college and beyond.  Or maybe that's WHY ...   I just don't want any of my own and have been blessed with a DH2B who feels the same.  We actually talked about it months before dating - when he mentioned that he was hoping to stay kidless, I knew he was a keeper.    Well, for that and many other reasons.  I live on campus at my grad school right next to the family housing and _really_ don't know how some of my fellow students do it.  I'm barely making it with just myself to feed and house, some of them seem determined to fill out their family to the max before they graduate.  Because student loans, second shifts, exams, papers, and two-bedroom apartments are just better with three crying kids?  .  They may be fantastic parents, but it just seems cruel to do that to a small kid.  "Here's your patch of grass to play in, someday your daddy/mommy will actually be home sometime and not studying so you can meet them."

We're a few months out from the wedding and have already gotten the "when're you gonna have kids" question from at least two sources.  Most I can just push off with the standard "let's get through wedding/school/whatever" line and change the subject.  The hard one was my friend who had an "oops" kid and is now the cutest, best mother.  She seems to feel that since she so loves being a mom, despite not wanting to beforehand, I will feel the same way and am missing SO much by refusing.  Maybe.  I'll gladly take that risk and enjoy your little guy and enjoy even more handing him back to you!


----------



## TXTurtle

And another random thing - what's with the "when you're a parent" thing?  Yes, there are some parts of parenthood I'm ignorant of.  However, I'm an EXPERT on what it's like to be a kid.  I've been able to connect with small fries from itty-bitty to HS and guide and, in small part, raise them because I remember kid-hood.  Why does giving birth to one, or even a small crowd of kids make you an expert on how another kid works?  They're all pretty different.


----------



## dwaddict

"I wish I could, but I really don't want to" [/QUOTE]

Love that!! Good for you!!


----------



## Danauk

Another married and child free by choice here. I'm quite lucky as we don't tend to get asked about having kids. There is one girl at work who does ask, but even the other girls tell her to stop asking as it's never going to happen! It's not that I don't like kids (I spend my day teaching a class of 9 year olds), I just don't want any of my own.

As for the topic of pet rats, we had 2 pet rats in my class for a few years. They made great pets, very friendly and very clean animals.


----------



## TKDisneylover

hollyb said:


> Your not even a mom and you think you know what is best for kids. What a JOKE!!!! Your better off getting a job washing dishes. Until your a mom you have no clue.



*Where did I say that in my post? *

Okay, so I was going to get on my bandwagon and spill out personal information about my family but decided this person did not deserve that (not to mention it's TMI).  Apparently some people misinterpret what others are saying.  Personality A, B or C? 

I love kids, I would not go to Disneyworld if I did not like them.  I just chose not to have them.  That's what this thread is about, right?

Have a magical day!


----------



## TKDisneylover

kennancat said:


> Tammy - just wanted to say welcome to the thread. Sorry the trolls woke up for your arrival  Your job sounds like it must be really tough at times - I'm glad there are people like you doing their best to help!



Thank you!  I'm looking forward to chatting with all of the "friendly" people here at the Dis Boards!


----------



## kennancat

TXTurtle said:


> The hard one was my friend who had an "oops" kid and is now the cutest, best mother.  She seems to feel that since she so loves being a mom, despite not wanting to beforehand, I will feel the same way and am missing SO much by refusing.


Since you mentioned church, I'm assuming you're religious. If your friend is as well, try pointing out to her that God knew what a great mom she would be and that's why her life worked out the way it did. If He feels the same way about you, well, do you really think birth control will stop that? That's what always gets me about refusing to use birth control for religious reasons. I'm of the opinion that if God wants my husband and me to become parents, a 99.7% prevention rate won't be an problem for him


----------



## TXTurtle

Oh, thanks, I hadn't thought of that.  That helps.  Well, in my conversations with her.  Now I'm a little paranoid -- think I can convince God to keep us childless?    Seriously, though, I like your perspective.  

And Tammy, THANK YOU for braving the world of child service.  Wow, that's a tough calling.  Don't mind the trolls, they're just there for decoration.  Like those little ugly ones lurking around in the garden, or those dressed up ducks in yards.  You CAN'T take those too seriously.


----------



## ChisJo

thanks for all the laughs....too many to quote, but sitting at work and laughing so loud....people are wondering if I have finally lost my mind....


----------



## kennancat

TXTurtle said:


> Don't mind the trolls, they're just there for decoration.  Like those little ugly ones lurking around in the garden, or those dressed up ducks in yards.  You CAN'T take those too seriously.


I've also seen them referred to as "seagulls" on another thread because they fly in, make a lot of noise, &^%$ all over everything, and leave!


----------



## TKDisneylover

kennancat said:


> I've also seen them referred to as "seagulls" on another thread because they fly in, make a lot of noise, &^%$ all over everything, and leave!



   

You guys are great!  It's nice to have reinforcements when it's needed!


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> I've also seen them referred to as "seagulls" on another thread because they fly in, make a lot of noise, &^%$ all over everything, and leave!




I like that one!!! 

I wish there was a smily for THAT! How interesting would it be instead of this one 

This one might be fitting
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 but not really I guess!


Maybe these???
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	








NAH! I might go hunt for a seagull!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> NAH! I might go hunt for a seagull!



Any luck? I found a website with every animal smiley imaginable (including a kiwi bird) but no seagull.  

Found a troll though!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Oh, that troll is perfect!


----------



## kennancat

How about this one?






It's labeled as "evil seagull", which I thought was fitting


----------



## plgrn

kennancat said:


> How about this one?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> It's labeled as "evil seagull", which I thought was fitting



That's perfect. I like the way he pops in and out of the frame. Just like our all-knowing friends pop in and out of a thread!


----------



## Hixski

TKDisneylover said:


> Oh, that troll is perfect!



I have this for the trolls. I borrowed it from someone on the CB. Those trolls better watch out. The married without children are a rough bunch.


----------



## plgrn

That is so sick. And SOOO fitting.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> I have this for the trolls. I borrowed it from someone on the CB. Those trolls better watch out. The married without children are a rough bunch.








Thats some sick stuff!


----------



## maddhatir

Sorry OT- 

But hey! Hixski-- did you just join our wench board???


----------



## HockeyKat

You guys are the best!!

-Kat


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Sorry OT-
> 
> But hey! Hixski-- did you just join our wench board???



Yes I did. But I am lurking right now. I don't know if I can be the wench some of you are. I can try though.......


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Yes I did. But I am lurking right now. I don't know if I can be the wench some of you are. I can try though.......



You dont need to TRY to be a wench.......you just BEEEEE  ......

Come on over and post- we love to get new wenches who admire the guys! 

(OK, well, obsess over them!)


----------



## kennancat

All right, it's been 5 days. Time to bump the thread back up 

Something I've been thinking about since last week. I'd posted a thread on the CB about my concern for a young cousin of mine who'd just gotten engaged to a man she hasn't been dating long. One thing that struck me about the responses is that several posted about how they had people who had objected to their marriages and they were still together with X years later with Y number of beautiful children. It started me thinking about the following question: does society judge children as the mark of a successful marriage? No one seemed to point out that they and their spouse had purchased a home, renewed their vows, gotten pets, traveled, or made any other choices that "proved" the success of their marriage other than having children. So, what is the sign of a good marriage (that can be measured/observed from the outside of the marriage)?


----------



## Hixski

kennancat said:


> All right, it's been 5 days. Time to bump the thread back up
> 
> Something I've been thinking about since last week. I'd posted a thread on the CB about my concern for a young cousin of mine who'd just gotten engaged to a man she hasn't been dating long. One thing that struck me about the responses is that several posted about how they had people who had objected to their marriages and they were still together with X years later with Y number of beautiful children. It started me thinking about the following question: does society judge children as the mark of a successful marriage? No one seemed to point out that they and their spouse had purchased a home, renewed their vows, gotten pets, traveled, or made any other choices that "proved" the success of their marriage other than having children. So, what is the sign of a good marriage (that can be measured/observed from the outside of the marriage)?



I read that thread too. You are right, the people with kids equated success with having children. I would say my marriage is successfull because he is my soul mate. We are best friends. We are very much alike in the things we like to do. Things of that nature. I'm sure everyone that doesn't have kids has something similar to say too. Some would be different but alot of the same.

Since you brought up other threads I would like to comment on some. Lately there have been quite of few about cheating spouses. Someone telling about their spouse they found was cheating. Asking for advice and some venting. The odd thing is most have said they are a SAHM and their husband just doesn't think he loves them anymore. I am sure some have not been but the ones I have read lately are. Just more food for thought.


----------



## maddhatir

I would think it depends on who you ask about a successful marriage- of course the people who have or want kids would respond- kids are a product of a successful marriage b/c that is all they know.  

And those of us who dont have kids have more answers- such as being partners/equals etc. 

I personally don't see many married people with children that I personally would say are equeals in the marriage- it usually seems the woman takes care of the kids- has all the aggrevation and the men go to work- come home and dont want to deal with the kids after a long day (can you blame them?)- that is his wife's job. 

Of course- those who are married might not see it that way- but that is my perspective on the outside looking in....and I would say I pretty much hit the nail on the head.....and that may explain some of the infidelity. Some guys don't want to have to put up with the kids yelling and the wife complaining about the kids misbehaving as soon as he walks in the door- I think many of them miss their freedom. 

And before I am flamed by some of the wackos trolling our thread-- I am not talking about ALL OF YOU! I am saying some of you.......


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:


> The odd thing is most have said they are a SAHM and their husband just doesn't think he loves them anymore. I am sure some have not been but the ones I have read lately are. Just more food for thought.


Interesting observation - I hadn't thought about it but a lot of them to seem to be like that. I would guess that's because of one of two reasons. My first guess would be that the "work world" and the "home world" can be so different that it's easy to lose touch with each other. Also, I think some couples (not commenting on any of the specific threads, just general thoughts) can get into a competition over whose day is harder. Once that starts, you're not supporting each other any more because you're stressed out. All of that leads to growing apart, which makes the marriage affair-prone. My other theory is that these husbands are just jerks who realize that their wives are dependent on them and feel like they can do anything they want. I like my first theory better though 

And by the way, I'll vote for staying home with the kids all day as the harder job. I know there's no way I could do it!


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> And those of us who dont have kids have more answers- such as being partners/equals etc.


I would agree that this is very important to DH and me too. I would assume the same for most CF couples. It's even one of the key things that holds me back from wanting kids - how do you introduce kids to the relationship while maintaining that equal partnership?




maddhatir said:


> Some guys don't want to have to put up with the kids yelling and the wife complaining about the kids misbehaving as soon as he walks in the door- I think many of them miss their freedom.


It's funny that you mention this - I've frequently heard DH talk about the other guys in his office (most of whom have SAHM wives) and how he can hear them on the phone getting beaten up by their wives because it's 5:03 PM and they haven't left work yet


----------



## Mischa

kennancat said:


> All right, it's been 5 days. Time to bump the thread back up
> 
> Something I've been thinking about since last week. ... It started me thinking about the following question: does society judge children as the mark of a successful marriage? No one seemed to point out that they and their spouse had purchased a home, renewed their vows, gotten pets, traveled, or made any other choices that "proved" the success of their marriage other than having children. So, what is the sign of a good marriage (that can be measured/observed from the outside of the marriage)?



Great question!  I've thought that too, it seems society judges marriages as "good" based on how many children you have and if you don't have children (for whatever reason) they automatically assume that there is trouble in the marriage.     I feel bad for these people who are that narrow-minded!

In my opinion, I think a good marriage is where two people love and care for each other, respect one another, supportive of one another, and compliment each other.  

DH & I have been married for almost 16 years now, we had a short engagement (we met in September 1990 (in a bar no less) got engaged at Thanksgiving the same year and married in April 1991).  We've been through ALOT in our 16 years of being together.  We've seen friends who married the same year we did and are now divorced (some twice divorced) we maintain that we got married for the "right reasons", we married "for better or worse".  We didn't get married expecting the other person to change; we married because we love each other and wanted (still do want) to be together - forever.  Heck, our friends accuse us of still being on our honeymoon.  We say "what's wrong with that?"

Yeah we don't have any kids (we wanted them, tried to have at least one but it didn't work); but kids don't make a marriage!  We know we have one person we can count on, no matter what happens; we have each other.

I've got to tell you all a story that happened to me last summer.  DH & I and my father (who is 84 and pain in the you know where) were at a wedding of a close family friend.  Well, dad turns to me and yells at me (it was loud at the reception) to not tell everyone we have been married for over 15 years.  I asked him why I shouldn't tell people that (since I am proud of that fact).  And he said to me "because you have nothing to show for it!  You have no children!"  Now our whole table heard this because as I said the man yelled this out to me.  So with every ounce of self control I could muster up, I said to him quietly "having kids does not make a marriage.  I am proud of the fact that I have been married to someone who is loving, kind, and generous.  And you better think twice before you say I have nothing; because if it weren't for him you would not be living with us!"  Then I told him (with a smile) to go to helle.     Now my father never loved my mom, always abused her (either physically or verbally) but because they adopted me he thinks he had a better marriage than I have now!  That was one of the last straws and he is now living in an assisted living place on his own!     and yes I danced when he was finally out of my house!  

just my 2 cents!


----------



## Hixski

Mischa said:


> Great question!  I've thought that too, it seems society judges marriages as "good" based on how many children you have and if you don't have children (for whatever reason) they automatically assume that there is trouble in the marriage.     I feel bad for these people who are that narrow-minded!
> 
> In my opinion, I think a good marriage is where two people love and care for each other, respect one another, supportive of one another, and compliment each other.
> 
> DH & I have been married for almost 16 years now, we had a short engagement (we met in September 1990 (in a bar no less) got engaged at Thanksgiving the same year and married in April 1991).  We've been through ALOT in our 16 years of being together.  We've seen friends who married the same year we did and are now divorced (some twice divorced) we maintain that we got married for the "right reasons", we married "for better or worse".  We didn't get married expecting the other person to change; we married because we love each other and wanted (still do want) to be together - forever.  Heck, our friends accuse us of still being on our honeymoon.  We say "what's wrong with that?"
> 
> Yeah we don't have any kids (we wanted them, tried to have at least one but it didn't work); but kids don't make a marriage!  We know we have one person we can count on, no matter what happens; we have each other.
> 
> I've got to tell you all a story that happened to me last summer.  DH & I and my father (who is 84 and pain in the you know where) were at a wedding of a close family friend.  Well, dad turns to me and yells at me (it was loud at the reception) to not tell everyone we have been married for over 15 years.  I asked him why I shouldn't tell people that (since I am proud of that fact).  And he said to me "because you have nothing to show for it!  You have no children!"  Now our whole table heard this because as I said the man yelled this out to me.  So with every ounce of self control I could muster up, I said to him quietly "having kids does not make a marriage.  I am proud of the fact that I have been married to someone who is loving, kind, and generous.  And you better think twice before you say I have nothing; because if it weren't for him you would not be living with us!"  Then I told him (with a smile) to go to helle.     Now my father never loved my mom, always abused her (either physically or verbally) but because they adopted me he thinks he had a better marriage than I have now!  That was one of the last straws and he is now living in an assisted living place on his own!     and yes I danced when he was finally out of my house!
> 
> just my 2 cents!



How sad that your father had to be like that. Unfortunately, I'm sure there were others there that thought he was right. DH and I have nothing to show either.  We have been together almost 26 yrs and married for 21yrs. My, my, what a failure of a marriage we have. Most people think of DH and I (especially me) as free spirits. I would rather they think of me that way than a failure and selfish for not having children.

DH and I will be taking our failure of a marriage and going to Vegas on Sunday. I am sure we will have a blast in spite of not having children.


----------



## contemp_mj

You know everyone is dancing around the subject, to be honest, my wife (of 5 years, been together for 7) cant stand kids, especially brats! If Disney would have a week with no kids, I would pay double.

I knew a long time ago that my life is just that, MINE! People say thats selfish, no thats a choice.


Oh yeah by the way, Im glad my Dad didnt think as I do!


Contemporary RULES!

MJ


----------



## TKDisneylover

Hixski said:


> DH and I will be taking our failure of a marriage and going to Vegas on Sunday. I am sure we will have a blast in spite of not having children.



I hope you and your DH have a wonderful trip!


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:


> DH and I will be taking our failure of a marriage and going to Vegas on Sunday. I am sure we will have a blast in spite of not having children.


Do they even allow children in Vegas?


----------



## kennancat

Mischa said:


> Well, dad turns to me and yells at me (it was loud at the reception) to not tell everyone we have been married for over 15 years.  I asked him why I shouldn't tell people that (since I am proud of that fact).  And he said to me "because you have nothing to show for it!  You have no children!"  Now our whole table heard this because as I said the man yelled this out to me.  So with every ounce of self control I could muster up, I said to him quietly "having kids does not make a marriage.  I am proud of the fact that I have been married to someone who is loving, kind, and generous.  And you better think twice before you say I have nothing; because if it weren't for him you would not be living with us!"  Then I told him (with a smile) to go to helle.     Now my father never loved my mom, always abused her (either physically or verbally) but because they adopted me he thinks he had a better marriage than I have now!


 I'd be so tempted to give him the eyeroll  and say something along the lines of "gee dad, after the great example of parenting you provided, I can't imagine why I don't want kids!". Some people just aren't happy unless they're making others miserable.


----------



## Hixski

kennancat said:


> Do they even allow children in Vegas?



Hopefully not the toddler temper tantrum variety.


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> I would agree that this is very important to DH and me too. I would assume the same for most CF couples. It's even one of the key things that holds me back from wanting kids - how do you introduce kids to the relationship while maintaining that equal partnership?



I always told DH there would be no way I would want to share my time between a child and him, I love him that much that I think it would just ruin our relationship. We can actually be together 24/7 and never get sick of each other- and we have been together, between dating and marriage for 26 years! It never gets old!

The best thing in the world is to have your DH walk throught the door after a long day at work, kiss you and say "Man! It feels so good to be home!"  

So we chose to have a relationship- between the 2 of us- that is WHY we got married-- and not share with anyone else


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski- Have a great time in Vegas-- 

And yes- they had to ruin that place too- they had to make it "family friendly"- 

DH and I are trying to plan a trip to Amsterdam in the fall- now THERE I doubt you will find screaming kids- well, unless they live there, and they are screaming. But I dont think we will be bombarded! 

You know- I ALWAYs tell DH I want to patent a housing developement idea  (doubt that is even possible!) BUT- I want it to be a whole development for CF people. Smaller houses, they will have only 1 bedroom but it would be a huge master bedroom- huge bath- big kitchen, so we can entertain. Have everything CF people need but not all the extras, like 3 bedrooms- 3 baths, a living room AND a family room. 

I want cobblestone sidewalks- gas street lamps, nice size yards for privacy. And no kids allowed! If you get pregnany- we have an association that tosses you out! 

Imagine how great that would be- you dont have to hear little Jimmy and his friends playing street hockey- no kids toys in your yard- and the best thing- none of those neighbors that all hang out together only b/c they have one thing in common- the next playdate! - 

Why dont we have rights- you know someone would fight it.


----------



## plgrn

contemp_mj said:


> If Disney would have a week with no kids, I would pay double.



Same here, although seeing all the screaming urchins nudges this fencesitter a little closer to a certain side of the fence!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> I always told DH there would be no way I would want to share my time between a child and him, I love him that much that I think it would just ruin our relationship.
> 
> So we chose to have a relationship- between the 2 of us- that is WHY we got married-- and not share with anyone else




Well said! I always tell DH I'm too clingy to share him with anyone. I've known mothers who are jealous of their own children and it's just sick! Don't want to be one of those.


----------



## PghLybrt

maddhatir said:


> You know- I ALWAYs tell DH I want to patent a housing developement idea  (doubt that is even possible!) BUT- I want it to be a whole development for CF people. Smaller houses, they will have only 1 bedroom but it would be a huge master bedroom- huge bath- big kitchen, so we can entertain. Have everything CF people need but not all the extras, like 3 bedrooms- 3 baths, a living room AND a family room.
> 
> I want cobblestone sidewalks- gas street lamps, nice size yards for privacy. And no kids allowed! If you get pregnany- we have an association that tosses you out!
> 
> Imagine how great that would be- you dont have to hear little Jimmy and his friends playing street hockey- no kids toys in your yard- and the best thing- none of those neighbors that all hang out together only b/c they have one thing in common- the next playdate! -
> 
> Why dont we have rights- you know someone would fight it.




Sign me up!!

My Mother is so disgusted by what I did to my house when I bought it.  I gutted it, I have a huge master bedroom , big soaking bathtub, the downstairs and back yard are all set up so that I can entertain.   She thinks I will never be able to sell it....I say I want to live in it (and live in it well) not sell it!


----------



## maddhatir

PghLybrt said:


> Sign me up!!
> 
> My Mother is so disgusted by what I did to my house when I bought it.  I gutted it, I have a huge master bedroom , big soaking bathtub, the downstairs and back yard are all set up so that I can entertain.   She thinks I will never be able to sell it....I say I want to live in it (and live in it well) not sell it!



You know what? Both of my BILs build and buy houses to resell- they are always these big houses- they are always thinking resale-- but guess what? There are tons of us CF people out there who would just love a nice sized home but without all the extra rooms that we will never use! 

Our first house was a 3 bedroom 1 1/2 bath- dining room, eat in kitchen, living room AND family room- what in the world did we need all that room for?? So we sold that and bought a nice sized condo- even thought that had 2 full baths- that was nice b/c we both had our own- but it had one large bedroom and a loft that we used for out "computer room" it was a perfect size for us- but we then got tired of having people around all the time and we got lucky that we found a 1200sq foot little rancher with a big yard for DH to put his 30x40 garage on it with lots of room left over. His garage is as big as the house 

In the past, if I wanted to make chages to our home DH would say- resale! Now with this house- I say-- this is OUR home and I dont care about the next people who buy it-- if they dont like it, oh well- we will find someone who does! There is always someone out there!


----------



## Hixski

We have a 1400 sq ft "starter home" ranch. We built it 20 yrs ago and it is still perfect. Ok, we have changed it a bit from its 1980's glory but we love it. It has 3 bedrooms and we use one for a guest room and the other for our office. We tell people the dog has his own room he just has to share it with the computer. We have a huge great room and thats all we need. We are going to be snowbirds when we are older so I guess we are staying.


----------



## JodyTG

I have a long time friend that also decided at a young age to not have kids.  She was lucky enough to find a great guy that felt the same way.  They've been together for about 15 years (married @ 5 years ago) and have their answer to "do you have kids" all worked out.

Sample conversation that I remember hearing a few months ago:
Nosy Person - So, do you have any kids?
Stace - Oh, yes, Ginger, Scottie, and Buddy.  They're so cute and do the funniest things sometimes.
NP - Really?
S - Yes, just this morning Ginger didn't want me to go to work, so she hid my car keys.
NP - How old is she?
S - She just turned one a few weeks ago.
NP - She's only one and she hid your keys?
S - Yes.  The poor baby isn't fully trained yet, so I had to put her in her kennel while I was searching for my keys.
NP - OMG!  You locked your daughter in a kennel.
S - She likes her kennel so it's not like it was a bad punishment or anything.
NP - You should be turned over to Child Protective Services!
S - Why, the kennel I have is AKC approved.
NP - Maybe for a dog.
S - Well, that's what my "kids" actually are after all.  Do you want to see their AKC registration forms?
NP - (Nothing said, she just walked off.)

Everyone standing aroung thought that it was hilarious.  They just answer these types of questions with answers about their dogs (which ARE, in their opinions, their kids and probably have it better than my own).  Also, if you break out pictures of your kids, she breaks out pictures of hers.

I'm another of those "breeders" but my 15 year old (at least) is a polite kid because she's been raised to be that way.  Since she was 8 years old she's given up her seat on the Disney buses to older people, people holding younger kids and babies, and pregnant women.  My son just turned 3 and is still in the "terrible two" stage, but he'll come around.

The kids that you guys are seeing at WDW are unlucky enough to have really bad parents that don't understand that unprotected sex is NOT a hobby.


----------



## HockeyKat

My last remaining female married friend called me today and told me she is pregnant.  Sigh.  It doesn't really matter that much, I guess, since she doesn't live close anymore.   This is the third one to bite the dust this year.

And to the folks who say we can remain friends... not so much.  I mean, we will likely still email once in a while, but until the children are in high school,  they won't have much free time.  And it will be as much our fault, since children are not welcome in our house.

Whee for the childless 30s!  I love my life and wouldn't change it, except to maybe find some couple friends that feel the way we do.   We still have some single friends, but that carries its own brand of awkwardness.

As to the housing complex, sign me up.  We have a fairly large house (2300 sq ft), but it is set up totally for us as DINKs.  The two spare bedrooms are for guests and the occasional drunken crasher and are usually shut.  The master suite is huge w/ a big walk in closet, soaker tub, etc.  The loft area has two white plush chaise lounges and a big screen.  The family room has another big screen w 2 15 inch flat panels on either side, 7.1 surround, leather couches, a wine rack server, a kegerator, a high pub table and chairs, and a full bar.  Just off that is a patio w/ built-in grill and 8 person hot tub.   All carpets are white, all furniture is white plush or black leather, all accents are brushed nickel, and the dining room table is always set.  Not exactly "family friendly."


----------



## PghLybrt

You know what I always find with my friends that have children (and maybe this has been discussed already)?  I find an underlying thread of jealousy from them all the time.  Yes they love their children and they would not change their lives but I always get those comments when I go on another vacation, or out to dinner again, or stay out till (insert any time past 10 here!),.

Do you all experience the same thing?


----------



## PrincessKitty1

maddhatir said:


> Hixski- Have a great time in Vegas--
> 
> And yes- they had to ruin that place too- they had to make it "family friendly"-
> 
> DH and I are trying to plan a trip to Amsterdam in the fall- now THERE I doubt you will find screaming kids- well, unless they live there, and they are screaming. But I dont think we will be bombarded!
> 
> You know- I ALWAYs tell DH I want to patent a housing developement idea  (doubt that is even possible!) BUT- I want it to be a whole development for CF people. Smaller houses, they will have only 1 bedroom but it would be a huge master bedroom- huge bath- big kitchen, so we can entertain. Have everything CF people need but not all the extras, like 3 bedrooms- 3 baths, a living room AND a family room.
> 
> I want cobblestone sidewalks- gas street lamps, nice size yards for privacy. And no kids allowed! If you get pregnany- we have an association that tosses you out!
> 
> Imagine how great that would be- you dont have to hear little Jimmy and his friends playing street hockey- no kids toys in your yard- and the best thing- none of those neighbors that all hang out together only b/c they have one thing in common- the next playdate! -
> 
> Why dont we have rights- you know someone would fight it.



Yes, yes, YES!!  I have actually been thinking a lot about a childfree retirement village (since DH and I will be retiring in 12 or 13 years). How cool would it be for childfree people to retire to a really FUN place and not have to listen to all their neighbors go on and on about their grandchildren??  That's omething that gets me about parents--it's like they have no lives or personalities of their own, everything is about their kids.  It gets really tedious, and at my age (50), everything is just starting to be about the grandkids! 

I want everything to be about Disney, and the beach, and kayaking, and my book business, and the internet, and great food/wine, and..well, you get it!

(When I returned to college in my late 30s, I once listened to an entire parallel conversation among a group of older students--my age--who were moms. They were sitting around a table and each one would say something about their kids:

"Samantha and I made chocolate cookies for her to bring to school today."

"Aaron has a girl from school who keeps calling him, it's so aggravating."

"Dylan's voice is starting to change, it's so funny!"

and on and on, with none of them responding to what the other moms said, but just going on about their own kids. It was very funny! )


----------



## plgrn

PrincessKitty1 said:


> That's omething that gets me about parents--it's like they have no lives or personalities of their own, everything is about their kids.



Scary, isn't it? One of my major pet peeves is screen names (not intentionally naming any from this board )such as "mollysmommy" "mothertofive" "mommyoftwinboys"......It's like they have no identity outside of their kids. Also I see women with MySpace/Facebook pages and the like who remove their own picture from their personal profile and replace it with an ultrasound photo or a picture of their newborn. Did they morph into their child?


----------



## plgrn

PghLybrt said:


> You know what I always find with my friends that have children (and maybe this has been discussed already)?  I find an underlying thread of jealousy from them all the time.  Yes they love their children and they would not change their lives but I always get those comments when I go on another vacation, or out to dinner again, or stay out till (insert any time past 10 here!),.
> Do you all experience the same thing?



Yep. My sis-in-law (age 30) has 5 kids ages 8 and under and whenever I mention anything about how college is going, a trip we have taken, etc. She just kinda sighs and says how she would like to do something like that when the kids are grown. She and her husband have been trying to take a 10 year anniversary trip for years, but can't because there's always an infant breastfeeding!! 

I've known my best friend since second grade and I called the other day to check up on her and her month old baby (I was not at the birth since mom and I were in WDW!  ) She said "Enjoy your life, Jenn. Take trips. Don't have any babies."  This is the girl that I thought was going to commit suicide if she didn't get pregnant! Granted that was probably the post-partum depression and sleep deprivation talking, but still!


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> Smaller houses, they will have only 1 bedroom but it would be a huge master bedroom- huge bath- big kitchen, so we can entertain. Have everything CF people need but not all the extras, like 3 bedrooms- 3 baths, a living room AND a family room.


Oh, but I love having way too much room in my house! Now, if only I could figure out the best way to hire someone else to clean it!


----------



## kennancat

plgrn said:


> One of my major pet peeves is screen names (not intentionally naming any from this board )such as "mollysmommy" "mothertofive" "mommyoftwinboys"......It's like they have no identity outside of their kids.


You know, that's always kind of bugged me too. I don't think I could have kids if I felt like I couldn't still be myself. I'd want being a mom to be part of my life, but not the be all and end all. Most of the women I know who have become moms manage this decently and don't feel the need to put down others who made different choices.

Personally, I feel like there's a class of women who just relish putting down other women to feel better about themselves. And when these women become moms, well, look out - now they've got something really good to feel superior about. I think most mothers are naturally a little insecure about how they're doing, so even normally secure women can be hurt by these catty women. Great example of what I'm talking about - go check out the CB for the thread where some poor mom got flamed on another message board because she - gasp - left her baby ALONE for 10 minutes to take a shower. Another example - one of our seagull friends from this thread is even nastier to other parents than she is to us.


----------



## Hixski

PrincessKitty1 said:


> Yes, yes, YES!!  I have actually been thinking a lot about a childfree retirement village (since DH and I will be retiring in 12 or 13 years). How cool would it be for childfree people to retire to a really FUN place and not have to listen to all their neighbors go on and on about their grandchildren??  That's omething that gets me about parents--it's like they have no lives or personalities of their own, everything is about their kids.  It gets really tedious, and at my age (50), everything is just starting to be about the grandkids!
> 
> I want everything to be about Disney, and the beach, and kayaking, and my book business, and the internet, and great food/wine, and..well, you get it!
> 
> (When I returned to college in my late 30s, I once listened to an entire parallel conversation among a group of older students--my age--who were moms. They were sitting around a table and each one would say something about their kids:
> 
> "Samantha and I made chocolate cookies for her to bring to school today."
> 
> "Aaron has a girl from school who keeps calling him, it's so aggravating."
> 
> "Dylan's voice is starting to change, it's so funny!"
> 
> and on and on, with none of them responding to what the other moms said, but just going on about their own kids. It was very funny! )




We have a golf country club type place by us that is somewhat childfree. You must be over 50 and no children under the age of 18 can live with you. I think that is about the best you can ask for. It is for "ACTIVE" retirees or anyone or 50. Not too bad. Where we live most of the kids are gone now so I guess we are staying.


----------



## diznee25

Great thread.    DH and I are childless by choice, he's 32 and I'm 27.  We haven't made a final "announcement" to family,  but instead always beat around the bush when asked the dreaded question, "When are you going to have babies?"  Come, on!  Even if we told them how we feel, they wouldn't believe us anyway.  So our best defense is no defense.  They'll figure it out in 5 to 10 years.   


Michelle


----------



## maddhatir

PghLybrt said:


> You know what I always find with my friends that have children (and maybe this has been discussed already)?  I find an underlying thread of jealousy from them all the time.  Yes they love their children and they would not change their lives but I always get those comments when I go on another vacation, or out to dinner again, or stay out till (insert any time past 10 here!),.
> 
> Do you all experience the same thing?



OMG! I JUST logged on to ask anyone how many times they hear this little comment...

*"MUST BE NICE!!"*

and then I read your post and thought it fitting to post the comment here!

I HATE when people say that to me and yes it is jealousy that makes them say this I am certain of it!

Oh and by the way-- *YES! IT IS NICE!!! *


----------



## maddhatir

JodyTG said:


> I have a long time friend that also decided at a young age to not have kids.  She was lucky enough to find a great guy that felt the same way.  They've been together for about 15 years (married @ 5 years ago) and have their answer to "do you have kids" all worked out.
> 
> Sample conversation that I remember hearing a few months ago:
> Nosy Person - So, do you have any kids?
> Stace - Oh, yes, Ginger, Scottie, and Buddy.  They're so cute and do the funniest things sometimes.
> NP - Really?
> S - Yes, just this morning Ginger didn't want me to go to work, so she hid my car keys.
> NP - How old is she?
> S - She just turned one a few weeks ago.
> NP - She's only one and she hid your keys?
> S - Yes.  The poor baby isn't fully trained yet, so I had to put her in her kennel while I was searching for my keys.
> NP - OMG!  You locked your daughter in a kennel.
> S - She likes her kennel so it's not like it was a bad punishment or anything.
> NP - You should be turned over to Child Protective Services!
> S - Why, the kennel I have is AKC approved.
> NP - Maybe for a dog.
> S - Well, that's what my "kids" actually are after all.  Do you want to see their AKC registration forms?
> NP - (Nothing said, she just walked off.)
> 
> Everyone standing aroung thought that it was hilarious.  They just answer these types of questions with answers about their dogs (which ARE, in their opinions, their kids and probably have it better than my own).  Also, if you break out pictures of your kids, she breaks out pictures of hers.
> 
> I'm another of those "breeders" but my 15 year old (at least) is a polite kid because she's been raised to be that way.  Since she was 8 years old she's given up her seat on the Disney buses to older people, people holding younger kids and babies, and pregnant women.  My son just turned 3 and is still in the "terrible two" stage, but he'll come around.
> 
> The kids that you guys are seeing at WDW are unlucky enough to have really bad parents that don't understand that unprotected sex is NOT a hobby.




That is great! Tell your friend...good one. DH and I are sitting here on the couch, me on my laptop- him with the remote and a mimosa- WHY- becasue we can!

Anyway- I was just reading the conversation to him and we were laughing. I was telling him about our thread and he said believe it or not if someone asks him if he has kids- and he tells them no, they tell him that is a wise choice- I pretty much get the same thing. 

Maybe b/c when people ask ME if I have kids- I say "oh god no!" and they know exactly where I stand, and dont bother to go further. But I am still waiting for that one obnoxious idiot, out in public not on our thread!  to make THE comment so that I can let loose.  

Well at least if I let loose in public, I wont get points!


----------



## maddhatir

diznee25 said:


> Great thread.    DH and I are childless by choice, he's 32 and I'm 27.  We haven't made a final "announcement" to family,  but instead always beat around the bush when asked the dreaded question, "When are you going to have babies?"  Come, on!  Even if we told them how we feel, they wouldn't believe us anyway.  So our best defense is no defense.  They'll figure it out in 5 to 10 years.
> 
> 
> Michelle



Welcome- Come join us on the "other side" it is nice and quiet and relaxing over here


----------



## Mrs.Reese

It is much quieter on this side.  There are no 3am wake-ups.  Nothing beats coming home to "peace and quiet."   DH and I are 26 and 29 respectively and say to all those nosy people who ask:  Why yes we already have children.  One has orange fur and the other is mutt.  Would you like to see their pictures?

We do so much more than our friends who have kids.  We're taking a two-week mediterranean cruise (on teachers' salaries, no less), and planning on doing two weeks in Australia and New Zealand in 2008.  Could we do this with kids?  Heck no!!


----------



## LoveStitch626

I was thinking about you guys & this thread last night and I finally got a chance to read the posts I missed over the last week. I've realized my fence sitting status has been decided without a doubt. I don't have any doubt in my mind that if we ARE able to have children (meaning the doctors can do what they can to help our problem out without it being too much of a huge strain on US.. I mean I've seen couples divorce over infertility treatments becoming a huge rock between them. I don't want that. SO.. if the doctors can treat him without too much drama..) then great. I'm too much of a hard a-- to tolerate snotty kids so I don't doubt my parenting skills. BUT.. if there's going to be a lot of problems/long drawn out poo with getting DH treated.. or if it just isn't going to happen no matter what... I will be perfectly happy being childfree/childless (however you want to put it). I'll know in my mind we tried, but it just isn't going to happen so it won't be an issue anymore. I realized this last night because we actually had an evening to ourselves (no friends over for once) and we were up at 2-3am playing with our new Wii.. the rock MP3s up (very un-child friendly stuff like Rob Zombie's stuff from House of 1000 Corpses and other things) KIND of loud.. not loud enough to bother the neighbors but loud enough to be HEARD... we were hooting & hollering and there were joyous & frustrated obscenities being thrown around because hey.. it was BOWLING... lmao it happens! My basic point is.. I realized how "just fine" we are by ourselves and handling the "when?" questions the way most of yall do.. by answering w/ pet answers. I also love how I deal with friends who are parents that go on about nothing but their children. I input my own stories of what my own little darling is doing.. the little darling being my own son the st bernard. I've known dh since I was 14. My first real boyfriend was his best friend at the time.  We'd been good friends through high school (stop me if I've posted this before) and when his father died we became best friends because I was there for him through the hard part of it all. I genuinely married my best friend. We had a sibling like relationship for many years until we got together. We do just fine together and don't need kids to prove that point. We can prove that point ourselves with how we act towards each other. 

I also wanted to note that I hesitate to properly introduce myself because I do have a friend who is on this board who's a mommydearestto3. Her dh & mine are good OLD friends and I don't want to jeopardize that friendship (and it'd happen if she read any of this because shes REAL like that). So.. if you'd like me to introduce myself properly, please PM me so I can do so. I just wanted to throw that out there because I haven't yet and I wanted yall to know I'm not a troll or anything. I just value dh's friendships and don't want to be the cause of strain. 

**powerfist to the CF'ers**


----------



## Mischa

Hixski said:


> How sad that your father had to be like that. Unfortunately, I'm sure there were others there that thought he was right. DH and I have nothing to show either.  We have been together almost 26 yrs and married for 21yrs. My, my, what a failure of a marriage we have. Most people think of DH and I (especially me) as free spirits. I would rather they think of me that way than a failure and selfish for not having children.
> 
> DH and I will be taking our failure of a marriage and going to Vegas on Sunday. I am sure we will have a blast in spite of not having children.



My father is a pain the in the a** - but he enjoys that!    Not sure if the others at the table thought the same thing, since most were older but one couple had their daughter with them (she's about my age) and wasn't married (or had kids).  I think they were just shocked that Dad did that out loud and in front of people.  Heck, they may have even thought "poor man he's got dementia or something."  (which by the way he does have the beginnings of dementia).

That's great that you guys are together (even after all that time!)     Hope you had a blast of a time in Vegas!



kennancat said:


> I'd be so tempted to give him the eyeroll  and say something along the lines of "gee dad, after the great example of parenting you provided, I can't imagine why I don't want kids!". Some people just aren't happy unless they're making others miserable.



You aren't kidding about the "great example of parenting" - I'd say "lack of parenting" because when I was a child Dad would go to work, come home drunk, fight with my mother and then go to sleep.  He's never been a loving Dad or has shown any emotion except anger.  Great role model huh?  He is definitely one of those people who isn't happy unless he's making others around him miserable!!

And he wonders why he is now living in an assisted living place and not with DH & I anymore.  I got tired of being called names (and with the dementia getting worse, he was taking our things which was driving us crazy).

The sad thing about that whole incident at the wedding was at the time, dh & I were in the process of trying to have a baby; (though Dad didn't know because it isn't any of his business anyway).  It was our last try and were thinking of going the way of donor egg.  (We had tried, unsuccesfully, several IUIs after we found out about one of my tubes not working properly.)Unfortunately, the meds I was taking to see how my body would react - gave me pre-cancerous cells.  The doctors aren't sure if the meds actually gave me the cells or what, but I didn't want to take any chances, so after thinking about it and knowing there isn't anything we can really do about it, DH & I have made the decision to be childfree.  It was a painful decision, but we're ok with it.  There are bad days sometime, but all we have to do is think about a bratty child (a couple of our friends have a few)    and we think, "...yeah it's a good thing we don't have any kids..."  And I think we both actually like our lives the way it is...no 2-legged kids, only the 4-legged fur kind!

Just a note to all those "fence sitters" if you think that down the road you may want to try for a child...get yourselves checked out.  I never thought we'd have a problem concieving and boy was I wrong!  I wish I knew then what I know now - I wouldn't have waited so long.  I didn't know about the tube until I was about 38 years old.  Never had any problems - very regular (if you know what I mean).     So from my experience, if you think you "might" want a baby in the future - get checked out.


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> I was thinking about you guys & this thread last night and I finally got a chance to read the posts I missed over the last week. I've realized my fence sitting status has been decided without a doubt. I don't have any doubt in my mind that if we ARE able to have children (meaning the doctors can do what they can to help our problem out without it being too much of a huge strain on US.. I mean I've seen couples divorce over infertility treatments becoming a huge rock between them. I don't want that. SO.. if the doctors can treat him without too much drama..) then great. I'm too much of a hard a-- to tolerate snotty kids so I don't doubt my parenting skills. BUT.. if there's going to be a lot of problems/long drawn out poo with getting DH treated.. or if it just isn't going to happen no matter what... I will be perfectly happy being childfree/childless (however you want to put it). I'll know in my mind we tried, but it just isn't going to happen so it won't be an issue anymore. I realized this last night because we actually had an evening to ourselves (no friends over for once) and we were up at 2-3am playing with our new Wii.. the rock MP3s up (very un-child friendly stuff like Rob Zombie's stuff from House of 1000 Corpses and other things) KIND of loud.. not loud enough to bother the neighbors but loud enough to be HEARD... we were hooting & hollering and there were joyous & frustrated obscenities being thrown around because hey.. it was BOWLING... lmao it happens! My basic point is.. I realized how "just fine" we are by ourselves and handling the "when?" questions the way most of yall do.. by answering w/ pet answers. I also love how I deal with friends who are parents that go on about nothing but their children. I input my own stories of what my own little darling is doing.. the little darling being my own son the st bernard. I've known dh since I was 14. My first real boyfriend was his best friend at the time.  We'd been good friends through high school (stop me if I've posted this before) and when his father died we became best friends because I was there for him through the hard part of it all. I genuinely married my best friend. We had a sibling like relationship for many years until we got together. We do just fine together and don't need kids to prove that point. We can prove that point ourselves with how we act towards each other.
> 
> I also wanted to note that I hesitate to properly introduce myself because I do have a friend who is on this board who's a mommydearestto3. Her dh & mine are good OLD friends and I don't want to jeopardize that friendship (and it'd happen if she read any of this because shes REAL like that). So.. if you'd like me to introduce myself properly, please PM me so I can do so. I just wanted to throw that out there because I haven't yet and I wanted yall to know I'm not a troll or anything. I just value dh's friendships and don't want to be the cause of strain.
> 
> **powerfist to the CF'ers**



You can post anonymously - isnt that why most of us use screen names! You feel more free about posting things! 

And I just had to comment--- OMG I LOVE ROB ZOMBIE!!!!  Sexy!!!Movies...music...you name it


----------



## ThreeMusketeers

DH and I have been together for almost 10 years. And we do have one child. And we like it that way. I feel like a lot of you do though, that everyone  "expects" us to have another. But we are very happy and content with our one, and feel like we can offer her so much more than we could offer 2.  
Why do people care so much what OTHER people do??


----------



## kennancat

ThreeMusketeers said:


> I feel like a lot of you do though, that everyone  "expects" us to have another.


Isn't it funny how that works? You do have a child and you're still not "good enough". Of course, God forbid you decide to have three kids, and then people say to you "don't you know what causes that?"  No joke - I saw this happen to one of my managers once. Talk about MYOB.


----------



## plgrn

kennancat said:


> God forbid you decide to have three kids, and then people say to you "don't you know what causes that?"



 I'm so gulity of that. I cringe when I hear that one of DH's sisters is pregnant AGAIN. *sigh* I need to practice tolerance and all that good stuff.  It's not like they are asking me to feed their kids so it shouldn't matter to me if they have 10! Just don't expect me to remember all their names much less their birthdays. Their own grandmother can't even do that.  


We actually just got back from a visit with the in-laws and didn't get a single "when are you going to have kids" comment. It was heavenly.


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> I'm so gulity of that. I cringe when I hear that one of DH's sisters is pregnant AGAIN. *sigh* I need to practice tolerance and all that good stuff.  It's not like they are asking me to feed their kids so it shouldn't matter to me if they have 10! Just don't expect me to remember all their names much less their birthdays. Their own grandmother can't even do that.



Isn't it funny how stuff like that can get your goat? I learned (via MYSPACE of all places!!) my younger half sister is knocked up. She just turned 19. I hate to say, but she's entered the BIT program...breeder in training. The whole mess has bothered me greatly but it's like you said. Don't expect me to remember poo. (She lives w/ our bio mom 6 hours away and has all her life. I'm not close with any of them. Our bio mom let her mom-my grandmother- adopt me when I was a tiny baby because she didn't want to deal with raising a kid..translation- she couldn't go party & be a floozy with a baby. Grandmother = mom and always has and always will be.) The kicker is they haven't told ANY of us down here she's pregnant. They don't even know we know. Oh the power of myspace.


----------



## LindsayDunn228

A Married Choosing Not To Have Kids member just checking in. Our 3 year anniversary was yesterday and it was so awesome to not have to worry about finding someone to watch the kids.

I went to a breakfast at Panera last weekend with the gals in my Sunday School class. We are all about 28-38 years old. At one point everyone was talking about kids. I remarked, "You know, I'm the only one here who doesn't have kids." Almost simultaneously all of them turned to me and said, "ENJOY IT!!!!"

I just about spit out my coffee I was laughing so hard!!


----------



## luvthemouse71

This may have been brought up, but I think it comes down to "misery loves company". I've noticed that the people in my life who pressure me to get married and start popping out kids are the most unhappy with their lives. I'm one of those ambivalent ones...meaning, I'm not opposed to marriage and MAYBE one kid if it happens but I'm not going to put my life on hold in the meantime. I hate those judgemental types who slam other people for their choices. I've known mothers like that who put other moms down because they didn't breastfeed, etc. I have a theory...I think some of these types, especially those who had an actual life before kids, are bored out of their skulls, so they approach motherhood like an obsessive hobby.  You know, they have to read all the "right" books, join the perfect mommy and me group etc. It's sad really and if I ever do have or adopt a kid, all the other "perfect" moms are going to hate my guts. I'm a firm believer that a big problem in this society is that children rule the world. They're not disciplined properly, and they have an inflated sense of their own importance. A good parent, IMHO, realizes that children need to taught boundaries, manners and respect.


----------



## maddhatir

LindsayDunn228 said:


> A Married Choosing Not To Have Kids member just checking in. Our 3 year anniversary was yesterday and it was so awesome to not have to worry about finding someone to watch the kids.
> 
> I went to a breakfast at Panera last weekend with the gals in my Sunday School class. We are all about 28-38 years old. At one point everyone was talking about kids. I remarked, "You know, I'm the only one here who doesn't have kids." Almost simultaneously all of them turned to me and said, "ENJOY IT!!!!"
> 
> I just about spit out my coffee I was laughing so hard!!



First.....Happy Anniversary







You mention that your friend's with kids say- ENJOY!-- I believe this is the mentality of most people with kids-- they might not want to admit it though. I am not saying people with kids don't love them or regret their decision- but I think when they make those comments- secretly they are saying "If I only knew then what I know now- Things may have been different"


----------



## maddhatir

luvthemouse71 said:


> This may have been brought up, but I think it comes down to "misery loves company". I've noticed that the people in my life who pressure me to get married and start popping out kids are the most unhappy with their lives. I'm one of those ambivalent ones...meaning, I'm not opposed to marriage and MAYBE one kid if it happens but I'm not going to put my life on hold in the meantime. I hate those judgemental types who slam other people for their choices. I've known mothers like that who put other moms down because they didn't breastfeed, etc. I have a theory...I think some of these types, especially those who had an actual life before kids, are bored out of their skulls, so they approach motherhood like an obsessive hobby.  You know, they have to read all the "right" books, join the perfect mommy and me group etc. It's sad really and if I ever do have or adopt a kid, all the other "perfect" moms are going to hate my guts. I'm a firm believer that a big problem in this society is that children rule the world. They're not disciplined properly, and they have an inflated sense of their own importance. A good parent, IMHO, realizes that children need to taught boundaries, manners and respect.




Who gives a rat's a$$ what those mommies who THINK they do everything right think- They are the one's who BREED the little monsters who grow up w/o the boundries, manners and respect! But of course, they can't see that.....but WE can! 

Too bad they don't have groups called "Down to Earth Mommies"- Most of those little "clicks" out there now should be called "Holier than Thou Mommies"


----------



## shazy03

maddhatir said:


> Who gives a rat's a$$ what those mommies who THINK they do everything right think- They are the one's who BREED the little monsters who grow up w/o the boundries, manners and respect! But of course, they can't see that.....but WE can!
> Too bad they don't have groups called "Down to Earth Mommies"- Most of those little "clicks" out there now should be called "Holier than Thou Mommies"



Totally agree, we have been married 8 years this september, together for 17, im 36yrs old and hubby 39yrs.  Apart from having no maternal feelings whatsoever, with the state of society today and lack of respect, manners etc etc, the little monsters frighten the life out of me !!!  Sadly its kids having kids these days and all the wisdom and life experiences thats all a valuable part of parenting, well its all falling apart. We have managed two holidays a year since 1993 to la la disney world, wouldnt been able to do that if little ones were around!!


----------



## plgrn

What big gorgeous kids you have, shazy03! What breed are they?


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> Who gives a rat's a$$ what those mommies who THINK they do everything right think- They are the one's who BREED the little monsters who grow up w/o the boundries, manners and respect! But of course, they can't see that.....but WE can!
> 
> Too bad they don't have groups called "Down to Earth Mommies"- Most of those little "clicks" out there now should be called "Holier than Thou Mommies"




LMAO how true!! I used to post on a TTC board back when we were actively trying. Some of those girls just blew my mind. The hardcore AP breastfeeding til the kid is 20 types because they've read a certain book and they're doing everything to a tee. I used to (well and still do when I come across one) mentally call them MommyNazis. They're the ones who don't discipline and think time outs suffice in ALL cases. I know this one girl who was a MommyNazi to the hilt. She refused to discipline her oldest and he'd constantly hurt himself couch surfing and running around like a wild hooligan. He even smashed his fingers in the oven door. Personally... and yall may disagree... but the majority of these wishy washy parents are are so pee'd off about how THEY were raised.. they're going the exact opposite of how their parents did things. I genuinely think people born in the late 70s are the LAST age bracket of people who were raised with any sort of respect/discipline (there are of course exceptions to every rule). There's a HUGE attitude difference between DH & I and DH's youngest brother. His youngest brother is going to be.. um 22 or 23 this year (I'm toeing 30 and he's going to be 31). Little bro is an arrogant self absorbed snot. I think it has to do with parents getting lax as the 90s came around because "times changed". BS if you ask me but I really hope as more people MY age are having kids and getting genuinely disgusted with how children behave now for the most part we go back to the old school ways of raising kids. With respect and discipline because whatever idiot doctor is writing these parenting "manuals" obviously doesn't have a freakin clue.


----------



## shazy03

plgrn said:


> What big gorgeous kids you have, shazy03! What breed are they?


Ahh thank you, big boy is a continental giant 18months old, nearly 22lb, and little fella, bless him a dwarf


----------



## Hixski

Hello Everyone.....
Back from Las Vegas. We had a great time. We did almost everything we wanted to. I won about $200 on quarter slots. Of course we spent alot more than that on everything else. We did not see one toddler temper tantrum. We did see a few parents pushing kids in strollers but that was it.

We flew Southwest and the FA on the flight back was a riot. She was going through the bit about seat belts, seat cushions, doors etc. She got to the part about the oxygen masks and said: "In case of loss of cabin pressure these oxygen masks will drop down. Please stop screaming and put it on your face. If you are traveling with small children, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING???" Since there was not one child on the flight everyone was laughing their a$$'s off. 

Just wanted to check back in and say "CHILDFREE VACATIONS ARE GREAT"!!!


----------



## plgrn

Hixski said:


> Hello Everyone.....
> Back from Las Vegas. We had a great time. We did almost everything we wanted to. I won about $200 on quarter slots. Of course we spent alot more than that on everything else. We did not see one toddler temper tantrum. We did see a few parents pushing kids in strollers but that was it.
> 
> We flew Southwest and the FA on the flight back was a riot. She was going through the bit about seat belts, seat cushions, doors etc. She got to the part about the oxygen masks and said: "In case of loss of cabin pressure these oxygen masks will drop down. Please stop screaming and put it on your face. If you are traveling with small children, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING???" Since there was not one child on the flight everyone was laughing their a$$'s off.
> 
> Just wanted to check back in and say "CHILDFREE VACATIONS ARE GREAT"!!!



It's good to have you back and glad you had a great time!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Hello Everyone.....
> Back from Las Vegas. We had a great time. We did almost everything we wanted to. I won about $200 on quarter slots. Of course we spent alot more than that on everything else. We did not see one toddler temper tantrum. We did see a few parents pushing kids in strollers but that was it.
> 
> We flew Southwest and the FA on the flight back was a riot. She was going through the bit about seat belts, seat cushions, doors etc. She got to the part about the oxygen masks and said: "In case of loss of cabin pressure these oxygen masks will drop down. Please stop screaming and put it on your face. If you are traveling with small children, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING???" Since there was not one child on the flight everyone was laughing their a$$'s off.
> 
> Just wanted to check back in and say "CHILDFREE VACATIONS ARE GREAT"!!!



Welcome back- glad to hear you had a good time.

I am very surprised the FA would be able to say something like w/o being worried someone may complain. You know how "they" get.


----------



## dolcezena

LindsayDunn228 said:


> Seriously though, I HAVE said that before!!!
> 
> I am one of those women that if I did come up pregnant, I would be crying my eyes out with an EPT in one hand screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"



Love that!! Always wondered what it's be like if those companies put people in their ads who DIDN'T want to get pregnant! 

Anyway, I've read a lot of these posts, but not all, so here's my 2 cents.

I have never, ever, ever wanted children. When I discovered I had an "untimely" pregnancy, my BF & I at the time took the adoption route. You think it's bad being asked why you're not having kids? Try being 8 months pregnant & seeing people's faces when you tell them that you're placing the baby for adoption! You get this "What kind of unnatural woman can you be to be carrying a child & not want to keep it??" look. 

I'll admit, I consider myself fortunate to have had the experience of carrying a child (not so fortunate on the whole labour thing  ), that it's something a lot of women will never experience, but each day I'm happy with my decision to place him. 1) He got parents who truly, desperately wanted a child to raise, 2) I loved him on sight, but can't imagine how much I would have had to change my life & my goals to raise him as I think every child deserves to be raised! 

As for the "When will you have kids" question - I guess choosing to place him when he was born finally convinced my extended family (8 out of 9 aunts pregnant before marriage, plus my own mother) that I didn't want kids!! DF & I have been together 4 years, we're 35 & nary a word! (However, my way's a bit extreme to get the questions to stop!  )


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Welcome back- glad to hear you had a good time.
> 
> I am very surprised the FA would be able to say something like w/o being worried someone may complain. You know how "they" get.



I guess she took a chance since no one had any kids with them. If anyone thought of complaining they would have to do it in writing. The laughter was too loud. Just remember if "they" go to Las Vegas "they" will have the little rug rats with them.


----------



## emmismom05

dolcezena said:


> Love that!! Always wondered what it's be like if those companies put people in their ads who DIDN'T want to get pregnant!
> 
> Anyway, I've read a lot of these posts, but not all, so here's my 2 cents.
> 
> I have never, ever, ever wanted children. When I discovered I had an "untimely" pregnancy, my BF & I at the time took the adoption route. You think it's bad being asked why you're not having kids? Try being 8 months pregnant & seeing people's faces when you tell them that you're placing the baby for adoption! You get this "What kind of unnatural woman can you be to be carrying a child & not want to keep it??" look.
> 
> I'll admit, I consider myself fortunate to have had the experience of carrying a child (not so fortunate on the whole labour thing  ), that it's something a lot of women will never experience, but each day I'm happy with my decision to place him. 1) He got parents who truly, desperately wanted a child to raise, 2) I loved him on sight, but can't imagine how much I would have had to change my life & my goals to raise him as I think every child deserves to be raised!
> 
> As for the "When will you have kids" question - I guess choosing to place him when he was born finally convinced my extended family (8 out of 9 aunts pregnant before marriage, plus my own mother) that I didn't want kids!! DF & I have been together 4 years, we're 35 & nary a word! (However, my way's a bit extreme to get the questions to stop!  )



Sorry, I'm an imposter on this thread but just had to say that I am adoptive parent to a gorgeous 2 1/2 year old daughter. I will always be so grateful to her birthmother for placing her with DH and I. Without women like you, women like me would never have children (I cannot have bio kids). Kudos to you! And I hate how people tend to scrutinize birthmothers making them think what a bad choice they're making. They're only doing what they feel is best for the child!


----------



## plgrn

How is everyone spending their childfree weekend??
DH and are aren't doing anything grand and glorious, but it will be quiet, peaceful, and spent doing WHATEVER THE HECK WE WANT!  

Think I might do a litle scrapbooking!


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> How is everyone spending their childfree weekend??
> DH and are aren't doing anything grand and glorious, but it will be quiet, peaceful, and spent doing WHATEVER THE HECK WE WANT!
> 
> Think I might do a litle scrapbooking!



cleaning/organizing the house.. busting out the Wii and also animal crossing (my new obsession).. if all goes well, we're gonna have a shut in weekend where we hang out & reconnect and don't bother w/ anyone else.


----------



## maddhatir

dolcezena said:


> Love that!! Always wondered what it's be like if those companies put people in their ads who DIDN'T want to get pregnant!
> 
> Anyway, I've read a lot of these posts, but not all, so here's my 2 cents.
> 
> I have never, ever, ever wanted children. When I discovered I had an "untimely" pregnancy, my BF & I at the time took the adoption route. You think it's bad being asked why you're not having kids? Try being 8 months pregnant & seeing people's faces when you tell them that you're placing the baby for adoption! You get this "What kind of unnatural woman can you be to be carrying a child & not want to keep it??" look.
> 
> I'll admit, I consider myself fortunate to have had the experience of carrying a child (not so fortunate on the whole labour thing  ), that it's something a lot of women will never experience, but each day I'm happy with my decision to place him. 1) He got parents who truly, desperately wanted a child to raise, 2) I loved him on sight, but can't imagine how much I would have had to change my life & my goals to raise him as I think every child deserves to be raised!
> 
> As for the "When will you have kids" question - I guess choosing to place him when he was born finally convinced my extended family (8 out of 9 aunts pregnant before marriage, plus my own mother) that I didn't want kids!! DF & I have been together 4 years, we're 35 & nary a word! (However, my way's a bit extreme to get the questions to stop!  )




Thank you for sharing your story- and welcome to the board!


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> cleaning/organizing the house.. busting out the Wii and also animal crossing (my new obsession).. if all goes well, we're gonna have a shut in weekend where we hang out & reconnect and don't bother w/ anyone else.



What is "animal crossing"


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> How is everyone spending their childfree weekend??
> DH and are aren't doing anything grand and glorious, but it will be quiet, peaceful, and spent doing WHATEVER THE HECK WE WANT!
> 
> Think I might do a litle scrapbooking!



hmmm? A "childfree weekend" it is NOT going to be. Last weekend I had my 2 BILs and SILs over- the one couple have kids- and when I asked them if they wanted to come over and party- I said.. maybe you can get a babysitter I just feel bad for SIL- the kids always want something- and my nephew-- AKA "the tumor", you cant pry him off of her leg- I just wanted adult time to hang out- thats why I suggested a babysitter- and just to let you know- she got ripped that night, I am sure she was glad to get a babysitter too! 

Well she calls me during the week and wants us to get together at her house this Saturday....so we can see the kids! I love my niece and nephew to death, but I try and wiggle away sometimes and tell my niece I want to go talk to the big people- she is so darn cute though. But the big people are having "all kinds a fun"  

So- thats what we are doing on Saturday anyway. We have to make appetizers- so I will make some PB & J pinwheels for the kiddies and something else for us big people. 

I WANT to see ZODIAC tonight (lovin' Jake Gyllenhaal altely for some reason ) But its probably going to be nuts!


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> What is "animal crossing"



It's a game for the Gamecube (or Wii.. it plays both Wii & GC discs) that's HIGHLY addictive. My BIL gave it to me for Xmas. It's a real time game meaning if it's March 2nd @ 1pm HERE, it's the same there. If you play in the middle of the night, most of the villagers are all asleep & the store's closed. You have your house and can continue to make it bigger and add furniture & stuff. Ok.. my explanation is REALLY making it sound dumb LMAO.. Let me see if I can't find something to explain it in all it's glory. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animal_Crossing_(GameCube)

That's a little bit better explanation. I guess it's like The Sims but MUCH more fun since your time is yours and you can do what you want (that was the thing I hated about The Sims.. it seemed like I was always cleaning, working or pottying!). Right now, I've been fishing rabidly and I've nearly caught all the fish possible. The rest I have to wait for Summer for those fish to be in season. It's HIGHLY addictive. Last week, DH & I woke up at the same time except I laid there and played possum while he went to potty. I threw the covers off and ran downstairs to beat him to the game first!!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> What is "animal crossing"



I was wondering the same thing.



maddhatir said:


> hmmm? A "childfree weekend" it is NOT going to be.   Sorry.
> 
> I WANT to see ZODIAC tonight (lovin' Jake Gyllenhaal altely for some reason ) But its probably going to be nuts!



I hate scary movies, but have been in the mood for one for the past several months for some odd reason. DH won't watch one with me though 'cuz he gets scared too.  Let me know how Zodiac is! I've been wanting to rent the "Exorcism of Emily Rose." Anyone seen it?


----------



## plgrn

LoveStitch626 said:


> (that was the thing I hated about The Sims.. it seemed like I was always cleaning, working or pottying!).



Just like real life!  I love the Sims though, so this sounds AWESOME.


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> I hate scary movies, but have been in the mood for one for the past several months for some odd reason. DH won't watch one with me though 'cuz he gets scared too.  Let me know how Zodiac is! I've been wanting to rent the "Exorcism of Emily Rose." Anyone seen it?



I've been dying to see Zodiac. Whenever there's a show on tv about him I always watch it. I've slowly been getting into true crime books. 

If yall hate scary movies, Emily Rose is probably NOT for you. It's a bit scary in parts. The one part where her friend wakes up in the dorm room... YIKES! DH doesn't normally freak out easily but that scene FREAKED HIM OUT!!! It's a good movie though. I enjoyed it.


----------



## plgrn

LoveStitch626 said:


> I've been dying to see Zodiac. Whenever there's a show on tv about him I always watch it. I've slowly been getting into true crime books.
> 
> If yall hate scary movies, Emily Rose is probably NOT for you. It's a bit scary in parts. The one part where her friend wakes up in the dorm room... YIKES! DH doesn't normally freak out easily but that scene FREAKED HIM OUT!!! It's a good movie though. I enjoyed it.



Mabye I'd better stay away then. "The Ring" freaked me and DH out so bad we won't even watch the second one for closure.


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> Just like real life!  I love the Sims though, so this sounds AWESOME.



It is a LOT like real life. If you love the Sims, you'd probably love this game. It appears to be so childish but it's REALLY not. Sometimes you can change the villagers ending catch phrase. One bear says "sweet pea" at the end of almost every sentence. We've turned one of our villagers (who's a natural grump) into the Red Foreman of the town. LOL We changed his saying to dumba--. You can buy OR design your outfits and umbrellas. You can cut down existing trees and plant new fruit trees or flowers. You can fish or catch bugs (you have a list for both things and MY goal is to catch them all.. nearly there w/ the fish). You can dig up fossils and either sell them for a pretty penny or donate them to the museum. DH likes running around and pestering the villagers until he either makes them mad or they give him something. It really is a lot of fun. They also have tons of cheat codes posted online. I've printed out about 84 pages of one set that includes money codes, turnip codes (every day the storekeeper buys turnips for a different price..depends on how good the deal is. last week he was buying for 162 a turnip)...furniture/wallpaper/carpet codes... clothing codes... It's HIGHLY addictive! Much better than Sims IMO


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> Mabye I'd better stay away then. "The Ring" freaked me and DH out so bad we won't even watch the second one for closure.



Personally, the Ring was LAME compared to Emily Rose. I love scary movies but nothing ever freaks me out so I'm always let down. Emily Rose definately made my pulse jump a couple of times.


----------



## plgrn

Do they have it for PS2?


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> Do they have it for PS2?



Just looked at Gamestop.com and they don't. They have it for Nintendo Gamecube and Nintendo DS. If you have or buy a Wii, you can play all  Gamecube games on that as well, so that's what we did. We bought a Wii so we can do away with having tons of systems taking up our tv stand. We've got a PS2 also because as ya probably know, they make a ton of PS2 games that don't make it to GC and a lot of GC games that don't make it to PS2. I think Nintendo fiercly guard their Nintendo created games so you have to go w/ their systems if that makes sense.


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> Personally, the Ring was LAME compared to Emily Rose. I love scary movies but nothing ever freaks me out so I'm always let down. Emily Rose definately made my pulse jump a couple of times.



I agree- you cant find any good scary movies out there anymore. The ultimate is the Exorsist, but nothing else really comes close to scaring the $h%t out me-- And I love to be scared!

I do like disturbing movies though..... like Rob Zombie's movies-- Sheri Moon plays the ultimate _WACK-O_- She is great. He is supposed to be making a remake of Halloween.

PS- I dont know anything about Gamecubes, Wii, The Sims- I have one addiction (well ok, a few but the rest we dont need to talk about ) its the internet


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> I agree- you cant find any good scary movies out there anymore. The ultimate is the Exorsist, but nothing else really comes close to scaring the $h%t out me-- And I love to be scared!
> 
> I do like disturbing movies though..... like Rob Zombie's movies-- Sheri Moon plays the ultimate _WACK-O_- She is great. He is supposed to be making a remake of Halloween.
> 
> PS- I dont know anything about Gamecubes, Wii, The Sims- I have one addiction (well ok, a few but the rest we dont need to talk about ) its the internet




I love Rob Zombie's movies. Did you know Sheri's got her own clothing line now? Totalskull.com
Halloween is slated to come out Aug 07 according to comingsoon.net. http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=14839

As far as the Gamecube thing goes, I forgot to mention that if you've got a gamestop nearby, you can get a refurbished GC pretty cheap. 1 controller, console and all the wiring. We're on our 2nd GC because the first one finally pooped out and we've had the refurbished one a lot longer than the NIB GC.


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> I love Rob Zombie's movies. Did you know Sheri's got her own clothing line now? Totalskull.com
> Halloween is slated to come out Aug 07 according to comingsoon.net. http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=14839
> 
> As far as the Gamecube thing goes, I forgot to mention that if you've got a gamestop nearby, you can get a refurbished GC pretty cheap. 1 controller, console and all the wiring. We're on our 2nd GC because the first one finally pooped out and we've had the refurbished one a lot longer than the NIB GC.



Went on Sheri's site and tried to order 2 Ts one for me and one for DH-- OMG- I kept adding the darn items to my cart and it kept saying it was empty-- I guess Sheri Baby doesnt need my money that badly. I will try later

As far as GC- I think I will skip on that- Neither DH or I are into games.


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> Went on Sheri's site and tried to order 2 Ts one for me and one for DH-- OMG- I kept adding the darn items to my cart and it kept saying it was empty-- I guess Sheri Baby doesnt need my money that badly. I will try later
> 
> As far as GC- I think I will skip on that- Neither DH or I are into games.



That happens to me sometimes with Big Dogs and other shopping sites. Are you running your browser through AOL? That's what I'm on and when that happens to me, I switch to the stand alone IE or Mozilla and I don't have a problem after that. I can never shop @ Big Dogs through the AOL browser..I always have to switch over to Mozilla.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> We have to make appetizers- so I will make some PB & J pinwheels for the kiddies and something else for us big people.




I just polished off some deli spirals from Sam's Club. They are in the frozen foods section and all you have to do is thaw and serve. Delish! There are three flavors in a pack. I had bacon/ranch today.


----------



## plgrn

LoveStitch626 said:


> I think Nintendo fiercly guard their Nintendo created games so you have to go w/ their systems if that makes sense.




Yep, that makes perfect sense. I'll have to find a comparable alternative game for PS2 since we don't need to get another system. DH loves PS2, but all he plays on it are the Medal of Honor Games. The little addict...


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> I just polished off some deli spirals from Sam's Club. They are in the frozen foods section and all you have to do is thaw and serve. Delish! There are three flavors in a pack. I had bacon/ranch today.



I SAW those last week- I said to DH we should get some appetizers from BJs they look good- ewww- he turned up his nose and said he wants to make something good-- ah- hello- that stuff looked good and I sure it tastes good-- MEN! 

So now, we have to go shopping tonight for his idea- Buffalo Chicken Dip-- that I can't even eat. He is going to have to make this crap tonight- b/c I am going shopping tomorrow and I dont have time to be makin' dead chicken dip 

I also saw scallops wrapped in bacon- again I dont eat that, but it would be a nice appetizer if you dont want to make them yourself (yes another item DH has to make) Like it matters!


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> That happens to me sometimes with Big Dogs and other shopping sites. Are you running your browser through AOL? That's what I'm on and when that happens to me, I switch to the stand alone IE or Mozilla and I don't have a problem after that. I can never shop @ Big Dogs through the AOL browser..I always have to switch over to Mozilla.



I have no idea I dont have AOL-- How can you tell?


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> Yep, that makes perfect sense. I'll have to find a comparable alternative game for PS2 since we don't need to get another system. DH loves PS2, but all he plays on it are the Medal of Honor Games. The little addict...



Same with mine. I got him the PS2 for Christmas. I do know however, the PS3 isn't doing so hot. I saw a report where the Wii was outselling PS3 2 to 1. My nephew's got both the Wii & PS3 and is ready to sell the PS3. Eventually you'll be ready for a new system (and I highly rec'd the Wii. It's beyond fun..we're addicted to the bowling game) so you can always hook up with the A.C game then. I doubt you'll find a similar game for PS2. If you do though, PLEASE let me know. Interesting tidbit though... a friend brought over his Call of Duty game for the Wii and it's pretty hands on. There was one part where you've got to wrestle the guy with the gun holding you down with the Wiimote. If your DH is into the fighting games like that, he'd probably like the REAL interaction of the Wii. You actually have to throw the grenades & all. They're also releasing Mortal Kombat Armageddon for Wii in April I believe. DH is going to be all over that one but I wonder how it's going to work. Nobody can manage those moves on their own!!  (LMAO I'm such a Wii salesman  )


----------



## plgrn

LoveStitch626 said:


> There was one part where you've got to wrestle the guy with the gun holding you down with the Wiimote. If your DH is into the fighting games like that, he'd probably like the REAL interaction of the Wii. You actually have to throw the grenades & all.




 ....I'm not telling him a thing!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> I dont have time to be makin' dead chicken dip




Oh tag fairy! 

 I think the tomato/provolone ones are vegetarian though not vegan obviously. You can even pass them off as homeade if you want! That's the beauty.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Oh tag fairy!
> 
> I think the tomato/provolone ones are vegetarian though not vegan obviously. You can even pass them off as homeade if you want! That's the beauty.



THAT'S what I think!! And no one will be the wiser But then again I have a really big mouth- I will just spill the beans left and right

ETA--- AND YES- WHERE IS THAT TAG FAIRY WHEN YOU NEED HER- you are the 2nd person in 2 days that have requested that tag fairy give me a tag. What's up with that??

ETA again! I am going to BJs tomorrow and getting those tomato/provolone swirlies- they are probably good- I am not vegan- I am ovo-lacto. Bring on the cheese!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> THAT'S
> ETA--- AND YES- WHERE IS THAT TAG FAIRY WHEN YOU NEED HER- you are the 2nd person in 2 days that have requested that tag fairy give me a tag. What's up with that??



That elusive Tag Fairy ovbiously has children, is a spendthrift, and overweight because I'm always on the childfree, budget, and WISH boards and never see her.  It amazes me that people with fewer post that I have like 5 different tags. Guess I'll just have to hunt her down! I know where she DOESN'T hang out.  


Enjoy your tomato/provolone swirlies!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> That elusive Tag Fairy ovbiously has children, is a spendthrift, and overweight because I'm always on the childfree, budget, and WISH boards and never see her.  It amazes me that people with fewer post that I have like 5 different tags. Guess I'll just have to hunt her down! I know where she DOESN'T hang out.
> 
> 
> Enjoy your tomato/provolone swirlies!



I think she hangs out at most of the threads that make you just wanna
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




Now THAT isn't going to get me a tag!


----------



## Hixski

We are going to have another fun filled child free weekend.  Nothing as good as Vegas but we will try. 

We are meeting up with some friends and doing the horse races. Not at the actual racetrack but the ones at a church hall. (Catholic of course) Everyone brings a snack or something and it is 10 bucks to get in. Beer, soda and setups. You get a booklet and bet on the horses. They show each race on a big screen. They usually have a wheel of fortune, silent auctions, etc. We have been doing this particular one for about 5 yrs now. It really is alot of fun. And yes, no kids, everyone must be over 21.


----------



## plgrn

Well, our child-free weekend isn't going as fun and fancy free as planned. My inlaws gave us all their old (6 years) appliances when they moved last weekend (which is such a blessing since all of mine are at least 20 years old!  ) and DH is having to do plastic surgery to the kitchen to make the new stove/oven fit. Just got my refrigerator swapped over and the washer and dryer won't be too bad.

At least I don't have kids running underfoot while we're trying to do this! And hey...I'm Dising and eating bacon-ranch pinwheels so I can't complain too much.  

Hope you have a great time Hixski!


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> bacon-ranch pinwheels



Those sound good.. could ya post the recipe?


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> Those sound good.. could ya post the recipe?



Probably Sam's Club or BJ's


----------



## maddhatir

ugh! I am trying to cut my PB&J pinwheels and the jelly is squirting out everywhere 

It is a pinwheel fiasco 

I made one that had PB&J AND Fluff- well I got maybe 3 good pinwheels out of that one and the rest were messed up.....OMG and I am eating them - I am going to puke!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Probably Sam's Club or BJ's




Exactly! Sams.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> OMG and I am eating them - I am going to puke!




Sometimes you just gotta have a PB&J!


----------



## WDWguru

maddhatir said:


> I agree- you cant find any good scary movies out there anymore. The ultimate is the Exorsist, but nothing else really comes close to scaring the $h%t out me-- And I love to be scared!



A little late to this part of the thread, but you HAVE to rent The Descent if you haven't seen it. We're huge horror buffs and caught it in the theater last fall -- it's the scariest movie we've seen in a LONG time. It was made for very little money, but doesn't look or feel like it. It's a British production about six women who go caving and get lost, then stalked by these incredibly scary creatures. Even before the monsters show up, it's so dark and claustrophobic it had me freaked.


----------



## hollyb




----------



## plgrn

WDWguru said:


> A little late to this part of the thread, but you HAVE to rent The Descent if you haven't seen it. We're huge horror buffs and caught it in the theater last fall -- it's the scariest movie we've seen in a LONG time. It was made for very little money, but doesn't look or feel like it. It's a British production about six women who go caving and get lost, then stalked by these incredibly scary creatures. Even before the monsters show up, it's so dark and claustrophobic it had me freaked.




We watched "Employee of the Month" last night (lame!) and that was a preview on the DVD. The preview freaked me out!  Of course, I scare easily.


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> We watched "Employee of the Month" last night (lame!) and that was a preview on the DVD. The preview freaked me out!  Of course, I scare easily.



You mean Jessica Simpson's acting INability didn't scare the pants off you???


----------



## plgrn

LoveStitch626 said:


> You mean Jessica Simpson's acting INability didn't scare the pants off you???




 It was frightening. Believe me.


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:


> A little late to this part of the thread, but you HAVE to rent The Descent if you haven't seen it. We're huge horror buffs and caught it in the theater last fall -- it's the scariest movie we've seen in a LONG time. It was made for very little money, but doesn't look or feel like it. It's a British production about six women who go caving and get lost, then stalked by these incredibly scary creatures. Even before the monsters show up, it's so dark and claustrophobic it had me freaked.



I saw that a few months ago. Those creepy things were scary- but it didn't scare the crap out of me. It takes a lot to do that. But I am still waiting 

As far as Employee of the Month- Jessica Simpson is a moron- I used to love Dane Cook but he is becoming to "mainstream" which means I need to say Adios to him


----------



## Mrs.Reese

LoveStitch626 said:


> You mean Jessica Simpson's acting INability didn't scare the pants off you???




You mean she was supposed to be acting???


----------



## luvthemouse71

Ok, I know this was mentioned a while back, but I've been having run ins with the "mommy of..." type posters in the pet peeves thread in the main board.  This post is just a rant so bear with me. One of the obsessive types was complaining that adults should let kids and parents sit on the buses..I had presented the view that there are many adults with health problems that may not be so obvious, and I also said that a healthy older kid should if anything, offer his/her seat to the elderly etc. Yikes, you would have thought I advocated making the little darlings walk back to their respective resorts! The "Mommiesof.." descended like a vicious horde! It's good reading for anyone who's interested...   PS. there are replies to my last post but I put both "mommiesof" on my ignore list...


----------



## plgrn

luvthemouse71 said:


> Ok, I know this was mentioned a while back, but I've been having run ins with the "mommy of..." type posters in the pet peeves thread in the main board.  This post is just a rant so bear with me. One of the obsessive types was complaining that adults should let kids and parents sit on the buses..I had presented the view that there are many adults with health problems that may not be so obvious, and I also said that a healthy older kid should if anything, offer his/her seat to the elderly etc. Yikes, you would have thought I advocated making the little darlings walk back to their respective resorts! The "Mommiesof.." descended like a vicious horde! It's good reading for anyone who's interested...   PS. there are replies to my last post but I put both "mommiesof" on my ignore list...




Woo-hoo! I'll jump right on there with you and fight the b@stards. Those are two of my biggest pet-peeves COMBINED. OMG!! Hold me back!!  

Headed there now.


----------



## Hixski

luvthemouse71 said:


> Ok, I know this was mentioned a while back, but I've been having run ins with the "mommy of..." type posters in the pet peeves thread in the main board.  This post is just a rant so bear with me. One of the obsessive types was complaining that adults should let kids and parents sit on the buses..I had presented the view that there are many adults with health problems that may not be so obvious, and I also said that a healthy older kid should if anything, offer his/her seat to the elderly etc. Yikes, you would have thought I advocated making the little darlings walk back to their respective resorts! The "Mommiesof.." descended like a vicious horde! It's good reading for anyone who's interested...   PS. there are replies to my last post but I put both "mommiesof" on my ignore list...



I was reading that one this morning. You're right, they do swoop in like hawks.


----------



## plgrn

Is it on the CB? I can't find it.


----------



## luvthemouse71

Sorry, I should have been more specific. It's in the Theme Parks and Stategies section...


----------



## plgrn

That breeder may as well gold-coat her kids and start praying and sacrificing animals to them. They are her gods. Nothing else matters.


----------



## kennancat

luvthemouse71 said:


> The "Mommiesof.." descended like a vicious horde! It's good reading for anyone who's interested...


That is actually pretty funny. Both posters who went after you were the "momTo.." types, weren't they? Nice to see you had that other person backing you up even before posting here  Those "pet peeve" threads can get scary fast, can't they?

Honestly, stuff like that is why I'm taking a bit of a break from the rest of the boards. I've subscribed to this thread and I plan to keep up with it, but a lot of the other areas just seem to have gotten mean lately. I feel like a lot of posters (or maybe I should say a few particular prolific posters) automatically assume the worst about people - there's no giving anyone the benefit of the doubt. Maybe it's because it's March and everybody up north is tired of the cold and being trapped in their homes  I think part of it too is I usually visit these boards for one of two reasons: to learn information or to try to offer useful advice where I feel I can help people and I forget that not everyone has those same motives. Frankly, I think there are some posters out there who use these boards to put other people down and make them feel better about themselves.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

plgrn said:


> That breeder may as well gold-coat her kids and start praying and sacrificing animals to them. They are her gods. Nothing else matters.



Ah yes, these are often the mothers have made it so the kids can no longer play tag at recess and are often the reason that we must give 4th, 5th, 6th and 7th place ribbons for everything!  

I once had a convo with a mom in which I was trying to explain that children need to experience both success and failure in school.  Heck I even had the research to show her. I really should know better.


----------



## plgrn

kennancat said:


> Honestly, stuff like that is why I'm taking a bit of a break from the rest of the boards.



Yep, the community board especially can get scary. I usually don't touch it with a 10-foot pole or get involved in any debates. I couldn't resisit this one though!


----------



## maddhatir

I know a few people that have said the same thing, not just about the CB but about DIS in general-- most over on the CB has stick up their butt and they have to JUMP on you as soon as you say the smallest thing! And everyone lust lets it happen-  

But of course if you are part of the CB "click" you can do and say anything you want.

Sad.


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> I know a few people that have said the same thing, not just about the CB but about DIS in general-- most over on the CB has stick up their butt and they have to JUMP on you as soon as you say the smallest thing! And everyone lust lets it happen-
> 
> But of course if you are part of the CB "click" you can do and say anything you want.
> 
> Sad.


This has been a while back. I don't remember what thread this was on, but it was complaining about people jumping all over others. Someone posted that they thought there were alot of angry SAHM's. Of course then it got really ugly. Funny thing was the ones that were peeved the most had already stated they were SAHM's. Go figure.


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> I know a few people that have said the same thing, not just about the CB but about DIS in general-- most over on the CB has stick up their butt and they have to JUMP on you as soon as you say the smallest thing! And everyone lust lets it happen-
> 
> But of course if you are part of the CB "click" you can do and say anything you want.
> 
> Sad.



That's why I didn't join Dis until I found this particular thread (you guys are cool). Everything I'd ever read about (tales from other people) or directly FROM this board (those other threads) were always so mean & nasty I just stayed put on my OTHER Disney board.


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:


> Someone posted that they thought there were alot of angry SAHM's. Of course then it got really ugly. Funny thing was the ones that were peeved the most had already stated they were SAHM's. Go figure.


You know, I really do try to avoid making sweeping generalizations about people, but I've kind of come to this conclusion as well. After my last bad experience on the CB, I did tell DH that if I ever posted a potentially controversial thread on there again, I was going to wait until after 6 PM to start it 

I really do think this kind of thing goes in cycles - back when I was doing my wedding planning I remember the wedding channel boards would just get ugly for a while, everyone would step back, and then it would be okay again for a while.


----------



## HockeyKat

In my experience, most message boards follow this pattern unless they are heavily, heavily moderated, and the moderators are not regular posters or in a "clique" of can-do-no-wrongers.  

I have over my internet lifetime been a member of disney, wedding planning, broken engagement, and hockey boards, and all wind up pretty much the same.

I have come to the conclusion that the internet world is made up of a few types of people.  Pollyannas, who *always* give everyone the benefit of the doubt.  Bitter angry people, who do the opposite, and are usually your standard troll.  Stupid people, who usually post inane things like "r u go to disney?" or post questions like "do I need to book Christmas dinner at Disney World in advance" without reading anything about WDW.   Very opinionated people, who think that anyone who doesn't share their exact brain is wrong and needs to be told so as harshly as possible (can also be trolls but in a different way than the BAPs).   And your normal types, who can occasionally be provoked by any of the former types into flame wars, but mostly just stick to their own opinions and roll their eyes a lot.

Disboards is waaaay too big for me to get involved in much other than this thread and the DVC boards.  My opinions are wildly unpopular, usually, and especially so in a "kid-friendly" environment, so it is best for my own sanity to stay away.


----------



## plgrn

LoveStitch626 said:


> (you guys are cool).



We know.


----------



## plgrn

Hixski said:


> Someone posted that they thought there were alot of angry SAHM's. Of course then it got really ugly. Funny thing was the ones that were peeved the most had already stated they were SAHM's. Go figure.




That's it! They are pyscho! The kids have driven them completely crazy!

Ok, my argumentative stint is over after seeing Hixski get flamed. Apparently, we are supposed to allow children in the parks to touch our butts and not say anything about it.


----------



## dolcezena

You guys are great!!! "Accidently" voiced a couple of opinions on a thread on the CB & immediately & basically got told that my opinion didn't matter because it wasn't eaxactly about "what they had been talking about."  

Hanging on to my sanity by my fingernails.....

ps - that pet peeves thread is hilarious!!


----------



## LoveStitch626

I skimmed through that Pet Peeves thread (the 3 pager right?) and want to know WHY in the world was that woman complaining..basically.. that she raised a gentleman who gives up his seat to people when she thinks he shouldn't have to? I'm GREATLY confused by that!!


----------



## dolcezena

LoveStitch626 said:


> I skimmed through that Pet Peeves thread (the 3 pager right?)




Don't know about the others, but this is the one I was referring to...


http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1375474


----------



## plgrn

There are two pet peeves threads. The first version and the poll version. Both are interesting.


----------



## dolcezena

OK, completely OT....

why oh WHY does my extended family insist on sending me all these cutesy-wutesy "send this e-mail to x# of people if you follow these instructions exactly & your wishes will come true" chain letters?!?!?!?

Don't even get me started on the "conditioner brand xy causes cancer, warn your friends!" e-mails.


----------



## Muushka

dolcezena said:


> OK, completely OT....
> 
> why oh WHY does my extended family insist on sending me all these cutesy-wutesy "send this e-mail to x# of people if you follow these instructions exactly & your wishes will come true" chain letters?!?!?!?
> 
> Don't even get me started on the "conditioner brand xy causes cancer, warn your friends!" e-mails.



I very rarely get emails that are 'chain emails'.  Probably because I just delete them and whoever sent it to me will have let that portion die with me!  I never comment back or send it on.  I just delete.

As far as the "WARNING" emails, I rarely get any of those.  If I recieve one I immediately look it up on www.snopes.com and see whether it is true or not.  99% of the time they are false, and I let them know that they are forwarding untruths and give them the link that disproves what they are spreading as truth.  Rarely do I get another one from them!  Most people appreciate the information.  Some just ignore it and when they have another lie to share, they just don't send it to me.  Sad really.

By the way, I don't share on this thread often, but I do catch up and appreciate the humor that we childless people have!


----------



## dolcezena

Muushka said:


> As far as the "WARNING" emails, I rarely get any of those.  If I recieve one I immediately look it up on www.snopes.com and see whether it is true or not.



That's EXACTLY what I do! Then I e-mail them the link for the page. Strangely, they _still_ send me this junk!


----------



## Muushka

dolcezena said:


> That's EXACTLY what I do! Then I e-mail them the link for the page. Strangely, they _still_ send me this junk!



Yes, but do you follow up your investigation by letting the perp know that they are spreading lies?? 

I have not had to resort to this follow-up if the above does not work, but if someone continued to send lies, I would do a "reply all" and let everyone they sent it to know that it is false!!  No, I am kidding, I am not that mean.

Oops, you do send them the link!  Sorry, I didn't see that!  Well, maybe you should do a "reply all" and maybe then they will stop!!


----------



## shazy03

plgrn said:


> That's it! They are pyscho! The kids have driven them completely crazy!
> 
> Ok, my argumentative stint is over after seeing Hixski get flamed. Apparently, we are supposed to allow children in the parks to touch our butts and not say anything about it.




That the scary thing these days, we are just losing family values and respect, I have been raised to respect my elders, if i didnt then I got a pinch under the harm if in public or at home us kids had to all stand in line (there were 5 of us) and dad went along the line giving us a red hand mark on our legs, called a stinger!! Never did us any harm, holding doors open for people, saying please or thank you.  Most importantly, my parents, being parents and not trying to be just mates with us, so we always respected them and our boundaries with them Sadly, not many kids these days are given these boundaries.


----------



## Hixski

plgrn said:


> That's it! They are pyscho! The kids have driven them completely crazy!
> 
> Ok, my argumentative stint is over after seeing Hixski get flamed. Apparently, we are supposed to allow children in the parks to touch our butts and not say anything about it.



I just found out I got flamed. I responded very kindly. I never said anything in front of the child. Are you kidding. I know how nutso people can get. Thanks for covering my back but I had a mother cover for me too. I thanked her for that. 

It is pretty bad when a kid (I don't care if he is 5 or 15) is playing with your butt and doesn't stop. Then when you post about it the "children are gods" crowd decend on you like hawks. Just crazy. I hope the person who flamed me gets the same the next time they go to WDW. Lets see how patient they are when some kids keeps playing and playing and playing.....with their butt.


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:


> I just found out I got flamed. I responded very kindly. I never said anything in front of the child.


Whoa - you got flamed because you didn't want some kid playing with your butt? I missed that one. Um - would they be happier if you *enjoyed* it when the kid played with your butt?


----------



## dolcezena

kennancat said:


> Whoa - you got flamed because you didn't want some kid playing with your butt? I missed that one. Um - would they be happier if you *enjoyed* it when the kid played with your butt?



   

Please please please tell me where you got flamed Hixski - I must see this.


----------



## Hixski

kennancat said:


> Whoa - you got flamed because you didn't want some kid playing with your butt? I missed that one. Um - would they be happier if you *enjoyed* it when the kid played with your butt?



I may as well put it out here, at least you all understand. Here is what I wrote and then the response.

ME:
I have had to ask a mother to keep her kids hands off of me too. The kid was around 5. He had a REAL fascination with the back pocket of my shorts. I just turned around and asked the mother if there was some reason her son couldn't keep his hands off my a**. She at least had the decency to be embarrassed and apologized. Apparently there was a small thread hanging from my pocket that he just felt the need to pull off. Too bad he never got it.  

THAT OTHER PERSON:
thats really "adult like" swearing in front of children.  

Its just a child, and disney is for children too. If it was an adult playing with your butt that would be different. A better way would have been to ask the child "Whats your name? Are you having fun?" Then it diverts the child's interest, and the parent hopefully wakes up to whats happening. Profanity to the parent is just immature.



I never said anything in front of the kid. If I am immature for telling another "adult" to keep their kids hands off my a**, so be it. He was going to town on that thread too. At one point he even put his hand up my shorts. Thats when I asked the mother if she could keep his hands off my a**. At that point I had had enough. Distract him my a**. Like I said lets see how patient they are when some kid is blatantly feeling you up.


----------



## dolcezena

LMFAOSHISWOMN!!!!!!

Apparently Galileo was wrong - the center of the universe isn't the sun, it's "precious" children.

PS - Please don't ask for a translation of above - suffice to say my computer screen now has splatters of a very nice red wine on it.


----------



## Hixski

dolcezena said:


> LMFAOSHISWOMN!!!!!!
> 
> Apparently Galileo was wrong - the center of the universe isn't the sun, it's "precious" children.
> 
> PS - Please don't ask for a translation of above - suffice to say my computer screen now has splatters of a very nice red wine on it.



Thats ok....I splattered a margarita when I found out I got flamed.

PS: I just decided to go back and edit my response on that thread. I was responding to someone who asked a mother to tell her child to keep his finger out of her a**. I asked the flamer to be an equal opportunity flamer.

Well, I am off for a bit. Need to go get another margarita.


----------



## plgrn

Hixski said:


> Thanks for covering my back



 Now I'm off to read *in my Paul Harvey voice*"the rest of the story."


----------



## plgrn

Nice going Hixski! Glad to see there is a mom in the world who has some sense, so maybe there is hope yet. BTW, I got an infraction for my smart a** comeback to your flamer. Instead of the ** I used an @ in quoting you and somehow the former is ok where the latter isn't.  At least I know now.


----------



## aclov

I just want to add something about the little boy that was picking Hixski's butt - I was reading today a article about Pet Etiquette.   It basically said that not everyone is a animal lover and there should be "basic rules" such as peeing, licking, jumping on people etc.   And I started thinking there needs to be something like this for children that is given to parents.   Nothing extravagrant just some basic guidelines.   I'm not trying to sound mean, I actually like children but I don't like it when I'm out to lunch with my friend who is a SAHM of three children and she expects me to put up with her misbehaving kids.


----------



## LoveStitch626

aclov said:


> the little boy that was picking Hixski's butt



LMAO I love how you worded that!  

I do agree with you about guidelines for pets/kids. But ya know nobody would listen... they're just guidelines anyway.


----------



## dolcezena

aclov said:


> I was reading today a article about Pet Etiquette.   It basically said that not everyone is a animal lover and there should be "basic rules" such as peeing, licking, jumping on people etc.   And I started thinking there needs to be something like this for children that is given to parents.



Here here! (Or should that be hear hear! Darn it, I have to stop reading that grammar thread...)

I'm a pet owner AND (shudder now people) a smoker. I respect other people's feelings on pets & smoking - I don't bring my dogs into restaurants, I don't light up wherever I please, but I'm expected to deal with cute little Sally "expressing her creativity" when she throws her mashed potatoes at a restaurant.


----------



## LoveStitch626

dolcezena said:


> Here here! (Or should that be hear hear! Darn it, I have to stop reading that grammar thread...)
> 
> I'm a pet owner AND (shudder now people) a smoker. I respect other people's feelings on pets & smoking - I don't bring my dogs into restaurants, I don't light up wherever I please, but I'm expected to deal with cute little Sally "expressing her creativity" when she throws her mashed potatoes at a restaurant.




Same here to a tee. You know, I've got the "pets live here you don't" thing posted on my fridge LOL so I'm guilty of being a NaziMommytoMyDog but I do put him outside when I know some people are coming over. Maybe parents can just toss their kids out in the backyard when adult company comes over??


----------



## ProudMonkey

This thread makes me feel safe and warm.  I feel like I finally found people who understand my wife and I.

We also dont plan on having kids and get TONS of questions why.  We got married young also so at first it was always "Why did you get married?  Was she pregnant?"  Then a couple years later it was "Wheres my grandkids?" and "When you two going to finally have kids?"  Like the others nothing helps.  I usually say "When you pay my mortgage off and cover our medical insurance."

As for the kids who are always touching you while your in line, I get it a lot also.  Apparently I smell like most moms who frequent the Disney parks.  I seem to get kids hugging my leg alot while not paying attention.  Usually I just look at their parents and stare at them until they get it.


----------



## dolcezena

LoveStitch626 said:


> Same here to a tee. You know, I've got the "pets live here you don't" thing posted on my fridge LOL so I'm guilty of being a NaziMommytoMyDog but I do put him outside when I know some people are coming over. Maybe parents can just toss their kids out in the backyard when adult company comes over??



LMFAOSHISWOMN!!!!!!

Can I use you as proof to my mom that I'm not alone in my pet obssession? She used to spend all her time bitc....ummm, complaining about the dogs when she stayed here! 

PS - Try living next door to a daycare, like I do. Granted, most of the kids are pretty good, but it reminds me EVERY day why I have dogs & a cat, not a kid.


----------



## luvthemouse71

Hixski said:


> This has been a while back. I don't remember what thread this was on, but it was complaining about people jumping all over others. Someone posted that they thought there were alot of angry SAHM's. Of course then it got really ugly. Funny thing was the ones that were peeved the most had already stated they were SAHM's. Go figure.


 What really aggravates me is many people don't read a post completely. They find something that makes them angry and run with it..especially the RP's(rabid parents). I guess reading comprehension skills are the first to go when you reproduce!


----------



## Hixski

Hey, I got an apology of sorts. Here it is.

That was a very good comeback! 
Some parents do NOT watch their children. I'll give you that. My son is autistic, and he was a butt feeler. We were always pullin him away from somebody's butt. He seemed obsessed with them. He also like to just lean on them. they were the perfect height. If the parents werent paying attention, it should be brought to their attention. We always watched our children. Some parents dont. I just objected to the profanity, not really the action.

Sorry for the flame. It occured to me that I had flamed after I did it and I remember thinking. "Ive been on the DIS too long". I try not to flame. Theres usually a better way to word things to make your point. I slipped.



Now we know why I got flamed. They have a butt feeler themselves.  I will have to remember that for a small child a** is a very bad word. Much worse than what is coming out of all the teenagers acting way too cool. Or the father screaming how he spent X amount of dollars using alot of very bad words.


----------



## dolcezena

wow, sanity reigns

OK, I just put that in to see what time cane up - I am now apparently setting my watch by DIS time....


----------



## Miss Mo

I haven't had time to read all this - just thought I'd put in my penny's worth as this is an issue very close to home for me at the moment.  I am 33 and have been married to my 2nd (and final!!!) husband for almost a year.  We were looking at a showhouse at the weekend and when the woman in the showhouse found out we already have a decent sized house and no children she basically told us not to be so stupid, that we didn't need a bigger house and that we should go home and fill our house with children so that we had something to fill our time!!!!!!!!! 

Now this sparked the whole kids/no kids conversation.  I am on the fence about it and genuinely REALLY confused.  I LOVE my life the way it is, I love my husband, my house, my job, my lifestyle and I don't want to lose that.  I am terrified after one bad marriage of doing anything that would ruin the great relationship I have now.  On the other hand I see the fun that all my friends are having with their great kids and can see the attraction ... but I also see their lack of money and lack of social lives!!  My husband works shifts so our social lives together are limited anyway and I wouldn't want it to disappear altogether.

And to top it all if we are going to be parents I don't want to leave it til I'm much older!!  How do people make such a big decision???  Terrifying me to death!!  I am also so fed up of everyone asking us when I don't actually know what I want myself!  Grr!!

mo x


----------



## maddhatir

ProudMonkey said:


> This thread makes me feel safe and warm.  I feel like I finally found people who understand my wife and I.
> 
> We also dont plan on having kids and get TONS of questions why.  We got married young also so at first it was always "Why did you get married?  Was she pregnant?"  Then a couple years later it was "Wheres my grandkids?" and "When you two going to finally have kids?"  Like the others nothing helps.  I usually say "When you pay my mortgage off and cover our medical insurance."
> 
> As for the kids who are always touching you while your in line, I get it a lot also.  Apparently I smell like most moms who frequent the Disney parks.  I seem to get kids hugging my leg alot while not paying attention.  Usually I just look at their parents and stare at them until they get it.



Welcome to the thread! WOW and you chose us to make your first post!


----------



## maddhatir

Miss Mo said:


> I haven't had time to read all this - just thought I'd put in my penny's worth as this is an issue very close to home for me at the moment.  I am 33 and have been married to my 2nd (and final!!!) husband for almost a year.  We were looking at a showhouse at the weekend and when the woman in the showhouse found out we already have a decent sized house and no children she basically told us not to be so stupid, that we didn't need a bigger house and that we should go home and fill our house with children so that we had something to fill our time!!!!!!!!!
> 
> Now this sparked the whole kids/no kids conversation.  I am on the fence about it and genuinely REALLY confused.  I LOVE my life the way it is, I love my husband, my house, my job, my lifestyle and I don't want to lose that.  I am terrified after one bad marriage of doing anything that would ruin the great relationship I have now.  On the other hand I see the fun that all my friends are having with their great kids and can see the attraction ... but I also see their lack of money and lack of social lives!!  My husband works shifts so our social lives together are limited anyway and I wouldn't want it to disappear altogether.
> 
> And to top it all if we are going to be parents I don't want to leave it til I'm much older!!  How do people make such a big decision???  Terrifying me to death!!  I am also so fed up of everyone asking us when I don't actually know what I want myself!  Grr!!
> 
> mo x



Welcome! You came to the right place- you will soon learn to use sarcasm when addressing the idiots out there who do not know how to keep their mouths shut!--


----------



## kennancat

Miss Mo said:


> We were looking at a showhouse at the weekend and when the woman in the showhouse found out we already have a decent sized house and no children she basically told us not to be so stupid, that we didn't need a bigger house and that we should go home and fill our house with children so that we had something to fill our time!


 All I can say is . Clearly this woman needed a refresher on her selling skills. I think I'd try to call her supervisor and let them know that you were really interested until you encountered this employee.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Welcome to the thread! WOW and you chose us to make your first post!


We feel special!  



Miss Mo said:


> I am on the fence about it and genuinely REALLY confused.  I LOVE my life the way it is, I love my husband, my house, my job, my lifestyle and I don't want to lose that.  I am terrified after one bad marriage of doing anything that would ruin the great relationship I have now.  On the other hand I see the fun that all my friends are having with their great kids and can see the attraction ... but I also see their lack of money and lack of social lives!!  My husband works shifts so our social lives together are limited anyway and I wouldn't want it to disappear altogether.
> 
> And to top it all if we are going to be parents I don't want to leave it til I'm much older!!  How do people make such a big decision???  Terrifying me to death!!  I am also so fed up of everyone asking us when I don't actually know what I want myself!  Grr!!
> 
> mo x



 Fencesitter here too! You've come to the right thread.


----------



## plgrn

Madd! Where were you yesterday? The freebie board was hurting without ya.  You didn't go off and get a life outside the Dis did ya?


----------



## plgrn

dolcezena said:


> OK, I just put that in to see what time cane up - I am now apparently setting my watch by DIS time....




Now you know the obsession! 

"soon you will be the master"


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Madd! Where were you yesterday? The freebie board was hurting without ya.  You didn't go off and get a life outside the Dis did ya?








 all morning!

I called the pharmacy to find out what to take to make it stop- they asked me if I was pregnant NOOOOOO!

I was lying in bed all day long.

I am feeling a bit better today- at least I am able to be vertical with out any consequences


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> they asked me if I was pregnant NOOOOOO!




AT least you got a good laugh yesterday! Sorry you are feeling bad. "The plague" is going around here too.  Feel better!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> AT least you got a good laugh yesterday! Sorry you are feeling bad. "The plague" is going around here too.  Feel better!



Thanks!


----------



## dolcezena

plgrn said:


> Now you know the obsession!



Trust me, the obssession bit me on my a** many days ago.  

Work??? I have to work today??? Crap - oh wait! Work =  pay cheque = $$$ for Disney!!! The animals can learn to LIKE generic pet food! They don't need special little "flavour pockets" in their food!!


----------



## dolcezena

I did it again - expressed an opinion on the CB - I need sane, normal non-judgmental/judgmental to talk to!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## plgrn

dolcezena said:


> I did it again - expressed an opinion on the CB



What were you thinking?


----------



## aclov

That's what you get for going over there!    I lurked around yesterday but was brave enought to only reply to the Pussycat Doll thread.


----------



## plgrn

What's everyone doing this weekend? DH and I are going to watch a movie tonight, clean up the yard and garage tomorrow and maybe go yard-saleing. Then we're going out to eat that night at a new seafood place in town. Sunday we're taking a little day trip to Nashville.


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> What's everyone doing this weekend? DH and I are going to watch a movie tonight, clean up the yard and garage tomorrow and maybe go yard-saleing. Then we're going out to eat that night at a new seafood place in town. Sunday we're taking a little day trip to Nashville.



LOL If yall post this q every weekend, it's gonna become REAL obvious REAL quick how boring we are. Play Wii & hang out (again) LOL. Nah.. well ya we are gonna do that, but I've got some curtains to hang and a few piddly chores to do around here. We found a tray of baklava (newly turned onto it since F&W) at the grocery store so we're probably going to invade the couch w/ the tray of baklava & wine and watch Star Wars....again... for the billionth time... in a galaxy far far away.

BTW, what's the 200/800 in your siggy?


----------



## maddhatir

dolcezena said:


> I did it again - expressed an opinion on the CB - I need sane, normal non-judgmental/judgmental to talk to!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Oh- No you were crying for help and no one of came 

I didnt even notice anyone posted anything-- what did "they" yell at you about??

ETA-- you should never go over there alone-- without reinforcements- it's a bad bad place


----------



## plgrn

LoveStitch626 said:


> LOL If yall post this q every weekend, it's gonna become REAL obvious REAL quick how boring we are.
> BTW, what's the 200/800 in your siggy?



Don't worry. DH and I are boring too. Usually I don't have anything to share when the question is posed!

I'm on the W.I.S.H (we're inspired to stay healthy) board and that represents 200 minutes exercised this month out of a goal of 800 minutes. People seem supportive and non-judgmental over there. It's a safe-haven. Of course, all we talk about is diet and exercise so I guess there's not too much to get flamed over!


----------



## LoveStitch626

plgrn said:


> Don't worry. DH and I are boring too. Usually I don't have anything to share when the question is posed!
> 
> I'm on the W.I.S.H (we're inspired to stay healthy) board and that represents 200 minutes exercised this month out of a goal of 800 minutes. People seem supportive and non-judgmental over there. It's a safe-haven. Of course, all we talk about is diet and exercise so I guess there's not too much to get flamed over!



very cool.. keep with it! lol i ought to be doing the same, but i'm trying to get done w/ my travel agent classes (to move on & become a disney specialist) so i've been doing 4-5 hours of classes a night and taking a test every day to get done by the end of the month.  have you seen that calories burned per hour page? www.caloriesperhour.com Awesome webpage that helps you track your food intake/portions/calories and calories burned through a TON TON TON of different activities. good luck dude... i'll be joining ya before too long on the move to get healthier & drop some of my sand bags


----------



## dolcezena

help me out here people, I'm booooooored!!! 

I think I'm still recovering from my Friday night out. I think that's when I realized that I was a grown up - when I realized that I can no longer go out & tie one on for multiple nights in a row...At least the dry mouth's finally gone.


----------



## maddhatir

ugh! Is it Sunday night ALREADY!?

Let's see Friday- did nothing.

Saturday- washed my car while DH helped a friend work on his trailer in the garage and then went to a surprise 40th b-day party for my friend's DH- had fun- seen lots of people that I haven't seen in ages and they had no idea who I was! That's the best. 

Me and my friend (who gave the party) grew up together 2 houses down from each other- people always said we looked like sisters when we were younger and used to hang out all the time. Well, she had 2 kids and we stopped hanging out- but at the party I can't tell you how many people came up to me JUST to tell me how much we look alike- from people on her side of the family (even her 20 something nephew who sees her ALL the time) to people I don't even know-- later when her and her DH got there, she came up to me and said you CAN NOT believe how many people are asking who that girl is that looks just like you---- 

We have come to the conclusion that "something" went on between 2 of our parents, but we are not sure if we want to know the truth 

Later on in the night, I came up with a theory and told her why I thought it might have been HER mom and MY dad-- and she said "what? are you callin' my mom a floosey?"  hey- one of our moms has to be the floosey 

and today- vacuumed my car, did some wash- got some chinese food- and I am now on the interent.

Kind of a boring weekend- but I like it that way sometimes. Nothing to do, nowhere to be, no one to answer to, and no one DEPENDING on you!


----------



## dolcezena

Today I have done.....absolutely nothing. Had to work Saturday (as I do most), so my weekends are Sun-Mon. Prefer it actually....I can go shopping on Monday & avoid the hordes.

Saturday at work was boring, but then it usually is during the day - evenings can be entertaining, but not this week (I work at a liquor store in a somewhat questionable neighbourhood). 

Friday night was actually a pretty big night for me. My company holds a wine taster of the year competition - this was my 1st year in it. Apparently my face was quite amusing when our boss announced I was the winner.  It's pretty cool, I get to be a judge at wine shows in Calgary & one in Vancouver!


----------



## maddhatir

dolcezena said:


> Today I have done.....absolutely nothing. Had to work Saturday (as I do most), so my weekends are Sun-Mon. Prefer it actually....I can go shopping on Monday & avoid the hordes.
> 
> Saturday at work was boring, but then it usually is during the day - evenings can be entertaining, but not this week (I work at a liquor store in a somewhat questionable neighbourhood).
> 
> Friday night was actually a pretty big night for me. My company holds a wine taster of the year competition - this was my 1st year in it. Apparently my face was quite amusing when our boss announced I was the winner.  It's pretty cool, I get to be a judge at wine shows in Calgary & one in Vancouver!



OMG I am SURE you are amused at some of the people that walk in there! I would think it would be like a waitress who works in a diner on the weekends after like 2 in the morning That is "the witching hour" 

Well congrats on your win! Now what is it that you had to do to BE named winner??

I love red wine. I can't believe it but for years I would always drink white wine- and I didn't really care for it much, never found a white that I would say was incredible. It was only maybe 2 years ago that I started drinking red wine and fell in love with it! I don't touch white anymore.

Right now I am on a Cartlidge and Browne Merlot kick- the last time I went to our liquor store- they had none in stock- all gone. The time before that- I bought the LAST 3 bottles on the shelf. Have you ever tried it??


----------



## dolcezena

maddhatir said:


> OMG I am SURE you are amused at some of the people that walk in there! I would think it would be like a waitress who works in a diner on the weekends after like 2 in the morning That is "the witching hour"



My DFi has better stories than me - he worked at our "scariest" store for 7 years. I think the best was the one where a guy came in, shirtless, then dropped his pants, bent over,  & ummmmm, attempted to conceal a mini bottle in a place better not mentioned on the DIS! We don't think theft was the goal.  



maddhatir said:


> Now what is it that you had to do to BE named winner??



Basically, they "blind pour" 3 whites & 3 reds. They then ask us questions about the wine & we score points. Mainly it's having to identify the grape variety/blend, country of origin/region and who the producer is.  Two of my friends & I were talking when we finished, before they totalled the scores, & we were saying, "Yup, we suck, where's that Champagne they mentioned & bring on dinner!" Apparently my face was quite amusing when they announced me the winner.  



maddhatir said:


> I love red wine. I can't believe it but for years I would always drink white wine- and I didn't really care for it much, never found a white that I would say was incredible. It was only maybe 2 years ago that I started drinking red wine and fell in love with it! I don't touch white anymore.



So many wines, so little time - personally, I drink whatever mood I'm in, at the moment, it's Smoking Loon Merlot.



maddhatir said:


> Right now I am on a Cartlidge and Browne Merlot kick- the last time I went to our liquor store- they had none in stock- all gone. The time before that- I bought the LAST 3 bottles on the shelf. Have you ever tried it??



Never even heard of it, but the liquor biz is a bit different up here. Gov't run is a good system, but not perfect. Our company's "small," only 40 stores, so some wineries won't ship to us, because we can't order enough OR because we're too big for them to supply all our stores. It's a weird situation.


----------



## maddhatir

I have had the Smoking Loon- I would buy it again.

You should try and get the C&B in your store. The winery is located in American Canyon, Napa County CA- OMG- yummy!

I just said to DH we should take a trip to CA this year to wine country. Maybe rent a Harley and do some riding- it looks beautiful.

We were trying to get a trip together to go to Amsterdam- however- it seems the airfare is crazy 800pp- so we might nix those plans. 

I also suggested Biketoberfest in Daytona (we have done that 2 times before- great time) he said- nah! I also want to do Sturgis in August- he will probably say no to that to......men!


----------



## dolcezena

You said it! DFi seems to think I'm not serious about DW next September. I love him dearly, but his idea of a great vacation is puttering around with a new home reno project (so he can play with his "toys") & being able to take a nap whenever he wants. 

He just doesn't seem to understand that now that we're making decent $$$, I want to have the kind of vacation REAL people have!!! 

To be fair, we refuse to let ourselves live "on credit," so a lot of things we want get put on hold. We often wonder how people with kids manage to do all the things they do! But then we remind ourselves we have virtually no debt - with the rather large exception of the mortgage! 

I think he's accepted that DW is something I really want & because he loves ME, he's going to go along with it. I'm just praying he'll love it enough to go back at least every couple years!


----------



## LoveStitch626

dolcezena said:


> Today I have done.....absolutely nothing. Had to work Saturday (as I do most), so my weekends are Sun-Mon. Prefer it actually....I can go shopping on Monday & avoid the hordes.
> 
> Saturday at work was boring, but then it usually is during the day - evenings can be entertaining, but not this week (I work at a liquor store in a somewhat questionable neighbourhood).
> 
> Friday night was actually a pretty big night for me. My company holds a wine taster of the year competition - this was my 1st year in it. Apparently my face was quite amusing when our boss announced I was the winner.  It's pretty cool, I get to be a judge at wine shows in Calgary & one in Vancouver!




I always refuse to do any shopping unless it's the middle of the day middle of the week. Nobody's ever there then. 

This weekend I manged to get the curtains up and that's about it. LOL Ok so I actually figured out what I was going to cook for the week (foreign concept to me) and made out the list and got the stuff. Yesterday we had the pleasure (note the dripping sarcasm) of being graced with the presence of a friend who's very pregnant and the type of person who talks about it every 5 mins to draw attention to it if nobody is cooing over her.  She came by to drop off invitations to her shower (this is not her first) that she's throwing for herself. The invitations are (and i quote) to honor her mommy... meaning the baby's mommy...meaning the chick throwing her own shower.  Needless to say I'm not going. I refuse to go to showers after the 1st kid unless it's a freak accident like twins or trips... or something special like "no presents..just a copy of your favorite book as a child" to build the kids library or something along those lines.


----------



## dolcezena

LoveStitch626 said:


> I refuse to go to showers after the 1st kid unless it's a freak accident like twins or trips... or something special like "no presents..just a copy of your favorite book as a child" to build the kids library or something along those lines.



My lovely cousin (who I really normally like) had TWO wedding showers. So not fair. 

DFi & I have been together for 3 years & all our small household appliances, towels, etc have to be bought by ourselves or given as Christmas presents. Why can't there be a "Congratulations You're In A Committed Relationship" shower? 

Course, we're planning on eloping, so if I _really_
wanted the schwag, we could just let everyone know we were getting married! 

Why is it that some pregnant women think they're the ONLY ones to ever bear a child????? Lord, the horror stories I've heard - and worse the cuddly-wuddly "my fetus is so advanced" stories! Ack - maybe they all grow up to be Mommy's of....?


----------



## Hixski

Dolcezena: Congratulations on your win. I remember you talking about it on another thread. 

My wine kick right now is Fume Blanc from Mondavi vineyards in Napa. We tried it when we were out there in Napa with friends from Sacramento.  (I have been dying to try that snooty smilie) You know us jet setting childfree folks....always running around.

I worked Saturday night (12 hr shift). I am in IT and it is covered 24/7 so I have to take my turn. We went to Home Depot today looking for more things for working on our basement. So a pretty uneventfull weekend. 

Don't get me started about people that give themselves showers for their 2nd or 3rd or 10th child. It is not up to everyone else to keep you stocked in baby items. Grrrrrr. Maybe I should throw myself a "I need things to finish my basement off" shower. Bet that wouldn't go over too well.


----------



## maddhatir

dolcezena said:


> You said it! DFi seems to think I'm not serious about DW next September. I love him dearly, but his idea of a great vacation is puttering around with a new home reno project (so he can play with his "toys") & being able to take a nap whenever he wants.
> 
> He just doesn't seem to understand that now that we're making decent $$$, I want to have the kind of vacation REAL people have!!!
> 
> To be fair, we refuse to let ourselves live "on credit," so a lot of things we want get put on hold. We often wonder how people with kids manage to do all the things they do! But then we remind ourselves we have virtually no debt - with the rather large exception of the mortgage!
> 
> I think he's accepted that DW is something I really want & because he loves ME, he's going to go along with it. I'm just praying he'll love it enough to go back at least every couple years!



DH is way Disney'ed out. I put him over the edge. From Dec 2005 to Dec 2006 we were there 3 times 

He likes the "laying on the beach all-inclusive" vacations. However, he was looking forward to Amsterdam but thinks the air is way too high right now. The past few years- we would do Disney for me and then do Cancun (which I do love it there also) for him to relax from Disney! 

His philosophy is- do it big. He wants a 3 week vacation to Fiji- that would be his ultimate- Me? I would rather take 2 or 3 smaller vacations to some fun places and maybe some weekends here and there. We just can't get our crap together and agree on anything- 

I can't believe we have been together for almost 27 years and we are total opposites- I guess the secret is...compromise


----------



## plgrn

LoveStitch626 said:


> Yesterday we had the pleasure (note the dripping sarcasm) of being graced with the presence of a friend who's very pregnant and the type of person who talks about it every 5 mins to draw attention to it if nobody is cooing over her.  She came by to drop off invitations to her shower (this is not her first) that she's throwing for herself. The invitations are (and i quote) to honor her mommy... meaning the baby's mommy...meaning the chick throwing her own shower.



How tacky! I wouldn't go either.



dolcezena said:


> Why is it that some pregnant women think they're the ONLY ones to ever bear a child????? Lord, the horror stories I've heard - and worse the cuddly-wuddly "my fetus is so advanced" stories! Ack - maybe they all grow up to be Mommy's of....?



 I know! What really drives me nuts is using the word "miracle" in any way related to an uncomplicated pregnancy/conception. "I have a miracle growing inside me" or "a child is a miracle." Um...no...It's biology. It happens everyday to every kind of creature on this planet including cows and rats. Have a nice day!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> He likes the "laying on the beach all-inclusive" vacations. However, he was looking forward to Amsterdam but thinks the air is way too high right now. The past few years- we would do Disney for me and then do Cancun (which I do love it there also) for him to relax from Disney!




There's always Adventures by Disney!


----------



## kennancat

My weekend seemed very focused on the whole CF decision  We spent Sat morning wandering around the convention center with a work friend of DH's and his wife. They're probably mid- to late thirties, also without kids. She and I ended up discussing it a little bit, pretty much in agreement on the whole liking our lives the way they are.

Next, we went to a birthday party for some friends. The SIL of the guest of honor had brought her daughter, probably three or four years old. I'd picked up that something didn't seem quite right about the little girl and then one of the other friends asked the SIL if she had decided on a speech therapist yet. Ah - so that was why I felt like something seemed off; she wasn't anywhere near as verbal as I've seen other kids that age. Also, seemed like a nice enough kid, but definitely a bundle of energy - running here and there and nearing pulling a tablecloth off a table loaded with food and drinks. I could tell the parents were doing the best they could, it's just a difficult age to handle.

Left that party and went to another one that our neighbors were having. We got there kind of late, so we ended up being the last to leave and talking to the hosts, who are friends of ours - not close close friends, but definitely beyond the acquaintance stage. They asked us about our kid plans, and we responded with our usual answer. During that conversation, the wife goes on to tell us about how they had a weekend to themselves the other day and ended up really missing their kids and discussing how empty people's lives are when they don't have children   I was a little taken aback and hurt by that comment - I really didn't expect her to say something like that. If it hadn't been late by the time we got home, I probably would have logged in to get sympathy from all of you   DH didn't think she meant it quite the way I took it. I don't remember exactly the way she said it, so my quote above is definitely paraphrasing. I'm feeling okay about it now after having more time to mull it over and think of two things: A) She said that after having a lot of wine to drink. I could easily believe she woke up the next morning and regretted having let that come out of her mouth. And B) this couple has been very open about their lack of religious belief. I know a lot of people who would find *their* lives empty because of that lack of religion, so I think it's just more of an example to me about why you shouldn't judge someone else's life from the outside.

Oh, and then Sunday we went with our friends to the Magic Kingdom to get their kids' haircuts for the first time (really neat little ceremony at the MK barber shop, btw, if you do ever go with friends who have young children). Uh, let's just say that one of their kids turned out to not be a big haircut fan  We spent a little more time at the MK, but it was really too warm and crowded for the kids to last long, so we went back to our place after that for a while. I was exhausted by the time they left - they clearly have developed much better levels of stamina than I have!  All in all, I have to say DH and I have no regrets about our current lifestyle after this weekend, even if others don't agree.


----------



## LoveStitch626

kennancat said:


> All in all, I have to say DH and I have no regrets about our current lifestyle after this weekend, even if others don't agree.



That's all that matters kiddo!


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> During that conversation, the wife goes on to tell us about how they had a weekend to themselves the other day and ended up really missing their kids and discussing how empty people's lives are when they don't have children   I was a little taken aback and hurt by that comment - I really didn't expect her to say something like that. If it hadn't been late by the time we got home, I probably would have logged in to get sympathy from all of you   DH didn't think she meant it quite the way I took it.



WHY do guys never think it is as bad as it seemed- DH does the same thing- hello- did you just hear the same thing I did?? I don't think I would have needed sympathy- I may have needed someone to get me out of jail for assault 



kennancat said:


> B) this couple has been very open about their lack of religious belief. I know a lot of people who would find *their* lives empty because of that lack of religion, so I think it's just more of an example to me about why you shouldn't judge someone else's life from the outside.



Boy I must be DOOMED to a life of misery- I have both, a *lack* of religious belief and a *lack* of kids- Then why am I happy as a clam 



kennancat said:


> Oh, and then Sunday we went with our friends to the Magic Kingdom



Now just that right there is fantastic- I just popped on over to the MK like it is nothing- How great is THAT!


----------



## dolcezena

kennancat said:


> ... discussing how empty people's lives are when they don't have children   I was a little taken aback and hurt by that comment - I really didn't expect her to say something like that.



She felt "empty" because something she was used to wasn't there. In all fairness, I'd feel empty if my dogs, cat & nonDW-appreciating DFi weren't around. Empty because there's no kids in my house? Nope, uh-uh, no way. After my sister leaves with my niece, all I can think is "Thank God I can give her back!" Seriously, I love the kid, but I have zero maternal instinct. 

Oh, and Hixski - LOVE the Mondavi Fume! One of my coworkers got back from a tour at Mondavi a few weeks ago - she loved it.


----------



## LoveStitch626

dolcezena said:


> Oh, and Hixski - LOVE the Mondavi Fume! One of my coworkers got back from a tour at Mondavi a few weeks ago - she loved it.



MIL swears by Mondavi. We found a new (to us) brand called Llano that was pretty darn good. MIL gave me a bottle of their gerwurtztraminer for my bday (my wine of choice) and it was a lot more mellow than the Fetzer I usually drink. 

I'm not much of a wine type but I do like that gerwurtztraminer and another kind DH bought a couple weeks ago. I don't remember the name. Claret maybe? I'm more of a rum girl lol..to the points my friends call me a pirate.


----------



## dolcezena

How very very strange! I posted a reply to this about 20 min ago & it poofed! Let's try this again, shall we?



LoveStitch626 said:


> I'm not much of a wine type but I do like that gerwurtztraminer and another kind DH bought a couple weeks ago. I don't remember the name. Claret maybe? I'm more of a rum girl lol..to the points my friends call me a pirate.



CAUTION: You are about to be lectured by a professional wine geek!

"Claret" was a term originally used by the English for red wines that came from English holdings in France (I think it was Gascony, but can't remember). Today, it is a generic term for any blended red wine.

If you like gewurz, try to find an Argentinian torrontes (a grape type). They can be tough to find, but DIRT cheap & very similar flavour profile to a gewurz. OK, wine lecture over.

Random thought - What kind of job do some people on the DIS have that allows them to post from work?? I NEED a job like that!!


----------



## LoveStitch626

dolcezena said:


> How very very strange! I posted a reply to this about 20 min ago & it poofed! Let's try this again, shall we?
> 
> 
> 
> CAUTION: You are about to be lectured by a professional wine geek!
> 
> "Claret" was a term originally used by the English for red wines that came from English holdings in France (I think it was Gascony, but can't remember). Today, it is a generic term for any blended red wine.
> 
> If you like gewurz, try to find an Argentinian torrontes (a grape type). They can be tough to find, but DIRT cheap & very similar flavour profile to a gewurz. OK, wine lecture over.
> 
> Random thought - What kind of job do some people on the DIS have that allows them to post from work?? I NEED a job like that!!



Hey I don't mind learning. In fact, if I have any sort of wine question I know who to come to now. Be warned!!  

The claret was a blended red and I liked it a lot. I just don't normally like red wines. I've tried several and they just haven't done it for me, but I did like that claret. Where can I find that torrontes online? 

LOL I don't have a job. I've stayed home for a few years now because between dh & I & all our animals, if someone isn't here to take care of business (errands, cleaning, etc) it just won't get done. Not enough hours in the day for that. We're just naturally messy and it takes a LOT of effort to keep our house from looking awful. I'm working on getting my travel agent classes finished (by the end of next weekend hopefully) and the classes are online. Once I get that done, I can most likely find an agency somewhere I can work from home. I'd prefer that. I like being able to be comfortable while I work instead of tugging on girdles and having to worry about hair/makeup every morning. I don't dress up real well. Remember Marla from League of Their Own? LOL That's me when I try to dress up.


----------



## Hixski

I work in IT at night 3 or 4 nights a week. I am the boss and the only one left on my shift so I can do whatever I want. Too bad they will be laying off May 1. I have been talking with head hunters the last couple of weeks. Sounds promising so far. Even if I don't find something permanent right away I can do long term contracting.


----------



## dolcezena

LoveStitch626 said:


> Where can I find that torrontes online?



I don't know what state you're in, but I've used this site to find wine reviews sometimes - pretty cool site if you're looking to see who delivers in or to your state. http://www.wine-searcher.com/wine-select.lml

I may have to take back the dirt cheap part though - I was pretty surprised to see the Argentinian wines seem to retail for the same price in the US as they do here! Considering your $$'s worth more & the horrendous taxes on liquor here, I would have expected to see wines that sell here for $8 selling for $4 there. Anyway, there's still some good stuff here. Try the "Don David" if you can - I loved it! 

Hixski, can you believe my mother wouldn't let me take Computers in high school as an elective?? She said it was only for people that wanted to be secretaries  Seemed to think I would only learn to type! *Sigh* If only I had ignored her.


----------



## kennancat

dolcezena said:


> Random thought - What kind of job do some people on the DIS have that allows them to post from work?? I NEED a job like that!!


I would never use my work computer for non-business purposes like posting on the DIS, of course  (You're all believing this, right?)

I'm an engineer, so sometimes I just have to take a brain break for a few minutes when I've been working on something for a while and I"m not getting anywhere with it. I work in a project-based environment, so I figure as long as I get my work done on time and with good quality, then it doesn't hurt if I take the occasional time out. Plus, I've subscribed to this thread, so I'll check my email during the day, see that it's been updated, and go check it out. I really do try not to spend too much time here while at work


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> WHY do guys never think it is as bad as it seemed- DH does the same thing- hello- did you just hear the same thing I did??


DH isn't too bad about that. Actually, it's probably more like I'm usually not the type that reads between the lines, so he and I are about even  I have a female friend whom I realize I've probably unintentionally offended in the past. She tends to be more sensitive to "unspoken messages" and I think can pick up on stuff that I missed but can sometimes misinterpret what other people mean based on her own experiences. I would like to believe that this other friend just meant that their lives seemed empty in retrospect or that she was referring to having free time, not that all childless/childfree adults are leading meaningless lives. If it turns out that she did mean it in the negative way and brings it up again, well then guess who I'm going to start inviting to church?  



maddhatir said:


> Now just that right there is fantastic- I just popped on over to the MK like it is nothing- How great is THAT!


Yep, there are definitely advantages to living in Orlando!


----------



## daisax

ended up really missing their kids and discussing how empty people's lives are when they don't have children​
I suppose we shouldn't be judgemental.  I've spent a fair amount of time wondering how empty people's lives are when they've lost the ability to discuss anything but their children.


----------



## LoveStitch626

daisax said:


> ended up really missing their kids and discussing how empty people's lives are when they don't have children​
> I suppose we shouldn't be judgemental.  I've spent a fair amount of time wondering how empty people's lives are when they've lost the ability to discuss anything but their children.



 Talk about a right on stinger. That's super super true. I don't understand how once intelligent adults who had a personality can completely lose their identity once they have kids. Dh & I were talking about this exact thing this past weekend. He made the observation that our tightest circle of friends..the friends we hang out with most.. are just that because of 1-the CF factor (whatever individual reason it may be) and 2-our views about kids in general. Even if kids were in the picture for any one of us, it wouldn't change our friendship because we're not the kind of people who are going to lose our identity to morph into MommytoBayleigh (lol yes I mispelled it on purpose). We're also of the school that "kids are to be seen and not heard" which is what each of our parents told us repeatedly. We're all pretty similar in our views and the general understanding is there. We have another friend who just got married to a girl with a 6 yr old. Instafamily. He's tried to become father of the year and has totally morphed into the type of person who has no identity. We always *knew* he would be that kind of person, but there's no fear in that happening with our tighter circle. :::ramble off:::


----------



## dolcezena

So are all of us CF folk recovering from a wild & crazy St Patrick's Day?

Not so wild here, but did have a Kilkenny or 2, while DFi had some Irish whisky. 

Crappy day out today - wild wind & freezing rain. Definitely not leaving the house today. Was like this on Wed morning, & when I left home to go to a tasting, I COMPLETELY wiped out on the ice. Feet flew up over my head & landed on my elbow. Didn't think it was too bad, so caught my bus & went to the tasting. By the time I got there my whole arm was throbbing & even my fingers were swollen! Todays' the 1st day I've really been able to move my arm. Darn, still too sore to do housework though!  

Guess I'll just have to hang out in front of the computer for the rest of the day!


----------



## AlleyKat

daisax said:


> I suppose we shouldn't be judgemental.  I've spent a fair amount of time wondering how empty people's lives are when they've lost the ability to discuss anything but their children.


I've come to the conclusion that you "Marrieds choosing not to...",as well as the gay/lesbian crowd, are the only reason I continue to read the boards!

Most "regular" posters belong to "The Mutual Admiration Society", shamelessly kissing each other's a$$es while starting every posted response with "I'm sorry".

Feeling the need to apologize for having an opinion that may not be agreed with(before it's even stated)is pathetic!

Advice involving child rearing decisions that should only be made by the parent(s) of that child, family matters that have no business being posted and "talk me out of..." threads, asinine, to say the least!

Walking on eggshells while bending over with lips puckered...no thanks!

Thank God for those of you who think outside the box, while making no excuses!  I'm assured that some normalcy still exists in this world!


----------



## dolcezena

AlleyKat said:


> I'm assured that some normalcy still exists in this world!



Nothing about _my _little world is "normal"  & that's the way I like it!


----------



## Mrs.Reese

AlleyKat said:


> Walking on eggshells while bending over with lips puckered...no thanks!



Yes. heaven forbid we say or do something that offends. Why we might actually learn to discuss and tolerate our differences if we weren't so PC. 

Imagine that. A society where people actually openly discussed differences and learned true tolerance.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Mrs.Reese said:


> Yes. heaven forbid we say or do something that offends. Why we might actually learn to discuss and tolerate our differences if we weren't so PC.
> 
> Imagine that. A society where people actually openly discussed differences and learned true tolerance.



I am so sick of the PC bull and everyone getting their feelings hurt over every little thing. People don't have a thick enough skin anymore.


----------



## Hixski

All this political correctness got me thinking. Since I am not sooo old to be called eccentric yet.....I am just a free spirit. I can live with that. I would much rather be a free spirit than a person that has no identity other than mommy to someone. I can understand my mother who is 74 thinking she is just MRS. SO and SO. That being her identity since I was born 47 yrs ago. She worked till she was pregnant with me. They had to take leave back then once you started showing. (My how times have changed) She never got the chance to go back to work. I have had to ask her what would happen if something happened to my father. I said you would only be MRS. SO and SO and have everything in my fathers name. At least she understood that she needed to be a person again in order to protect herself.

I think the women that worry more about being a SAHM and being there just for the kids are doing themselves a big disservice. Do any of these women worry about being able to take care of themselves first if anything happens. Or especially if there are children involved. I can't believe the 20 somethings I hear talking about finding a man to take care of them. Just makes me crazy. Ok, didn't mean to vent but on top of being politically correct some of these women make me crazy.


----------



## kennancat

Today's "For Better or Worse" made me giggle. Thought you all might enjoy it too:


----------



## maddhatir

Love it! 

I was visiting my SIL today (she has 2 kids but she is not a mommy nazi) anyway she made a good reference about me today- she said I wear "kid-proof armour" 

Everything "kid" oriented just bounces off of me!

I like my armour just fine!


----------



## jojoandhb

I saw this topic and found it interesting. I used to be one of those people who didn't want to have kids. When I was getting my first college degree, my fellow classmates would get really mad at me and say I was selfish because I wanted a career and to travel without worrying about children. I also just didn't like kids. I thought they were loud, messy, and just bratty. I worked for a while as a photographer, and I often took pictures of children. That made me hate parents and not want to be one. Well, 2 weeks after graduation, I found out I was pregnant, and I was on birth control. I thought about abortion, but I couldn't go through with it, so I had the baby. Turns out I ended up with the best baby in the whole world. I wouldn't trade her for anything. I think it's one of those things you have to experience to understand. I'm a bit unconventional as a mother mostly because I didn't have one of my own so I'm not sure what I should be doing. I just wing it and play a lot of dress up and go to the zoo and read books a lot. I just try to picture what I would want if I were a kid again. I don't have any friends with kids, so I don't know anyone who lost their identity when they had kids, but I would think there was something wrong with people like that BEFORE they became a parent. I just wanted to say that I was one of you until I had my daughter. I have a different perspective now, although you couldn't pay me to have another child! One is more than enough.


----------



## Muushka

jojoandhb said:


> I saw this topic and found it interesting. I used to be one of those people who didn't want to have kids. When I was getting my first college degree, my fellow classmates would get really mad at me and say I was selfish because I wanted a career and to travel without worrying about children. I also just didn't like kids. I thought they were loud, messy, and just bratty. I worked for a while as a photographer, and I often took pictures of children. That made me hate parents and not want to be one. Well, 2 weeks after graduation, I found out I was pregnant, and I was on birth control. I thought about abortion, but I couldn't go through with it, so I had the baby. Turns out I ended up with the best baby in the whole world. I wouldn't trade her for anything. I think it's one of those things you have to experience to understand. I'm a bit unconventional as a mother mostly because I didn't have one of my own so I'm not sure what I should be doing. I just wing it and play a lot of dress up and go to the zoo and read books a lot. I just try to picture what I would want if I were a kid again. I don't have any friends with kids, so I don't know anyone who lost their identity when they had kids, but I would think there was something wrong with people like that BEFORE they became a parent. I just wanted to say that I was one of you until I had my daughter. I have a different perspective now, although you couldn't pay me to have another child! One is more than enough.



Thanks, jojoandhb, for sharing.  Had I gotten pregnant at any point, our lives would have been identical.  I would not have had an abortion.  I would have loved that child.  And like you, having not had a mother of my own, I also would have winged it.  I am so glad that everything worked out for you and I'll bet you are a great mom.


----------



## freemore

When I was in my child bearing years I didn't really think I needed children but mostly it was my husband who said he didn't really want any children.  When we turned 40, he decided he didn't really need me either and he married a younger woman and had a child with her. By the time I was in my 40s I had done pretty much everything I wanted to do in my life, I had traveled, found out who I was, got my degree, had my career, was married for 20 years but I still didn't really feel a need for children.  But now I am 66 and both of my parents have passed away.  Let me tell you when you lose both of your parents, you will wish that you had children and grandchildren.  What I have learned in my 66 years is that my family was the most important thing in my life, I just didn't know it at the time.  It took me a long time to realize how important family is.  You will change as you grow older, what is most important to you now most likely won't be what is most important to you 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, or 70 years from now.  So enjoy your life now and what is important to you now, but keep in mind that you will change as you get older, and what you want out of life will change as you get older, but more importantly keep in mind that you can't go back and change it.


----------



## maidenfairy

I have friends who are married and have decided not to have children. I think its great for them. Being a breeder myself i can say I am sometimes jealous of their freedom. Maybe that is where all the negative comments are coming from, jealousy. 

Tonya


----------



## kennancat

freemore said:


> When we turned 40, he decided he didn't really need me either and he married a younger woman and had a child with her.


Growing up, my parents knew a couple who went through a very similar experience. My question would be even if you had the power to change this part of your life, would you really have wanted to have kids with your ex-DH? He sounds like a jerk.



freemore said:


> Let me tell you when you lose both of your parents, you will wish that you had children and grandchildren.  What I have learned in my 66 years is that my family was the most important thing in my life, I just didn't know it at the time.  It took me a long time to realize how important family is.


I agree that family is very important. However, it's no guarantee that you won't be alone in your old age. My grandmother has outlived 2 of her 3 children. She and my mother (the surviving child) are not close, nor is she particularly close to any of her grandchildren. I don't know if she's lonely or not, but it definitely shows me that you can't count on other people to complete your life and provide you with happiness. 



freemore said:


> So enjoy your life now and what is important to you now, but keep in mind that you will change as you get older, and what you want out of life will change as you get older, but more importantly keep in mind that you can't go back and change it.


Certainly - this is true in all decisions, not just about having children. Hindsight is 20/20, as they say. You make the best decision you can based on the information you have at the time and hope it was the right one. As many have said here, we'd "rather regret not having children than regret having them." Bottom line for me - I'm still on the fence about the whole thing and I am afraid of ending up alone. Nonetheless, I do not want to make the choice to have children out of fear. If DH and I do decide we want them, it will be a decision based on love, not fear.


----------



## Muushka

freemore said:


> When I was in my child bearing years I didn't really think I needed children but mostly it was my husband who said he didn't really want any children.  When we turned 40, he decided he didn't really need me either and he married a younger woman and had a child with her. By the time I was in my 40s I had done pretty much everything I wanted to do in my life, I had traveled, found out who I was, got my degree, had my career, was married for 20 years but I still didn't really feel a need for children.  But now I am 66 and both of my parents have passed away.  Let me tell you when you lose both of your parents, you will wish that you had children and grandchildren.  What I have learned in my 66 years is that my family was the most important thing in my life, I just didn't know it at the time.  It took me a long time to realize how important family is.  You will change as you grow older, what is most important to you now most likely won't be what is most important to you 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, or 70 years from now.  So enjoy your life now and what is important to you now, but keep in mind that you will change as you get older, and what you want out of life will change as you get older, but more importantly keep in mind that you can't go back and change it.



Your post got me to thinking.  I think your statement 





> When I was young I thought I didn't need children.


 is what got me going.  Need children or want children.  I wonder why people have them, because they need them or want them?  And which, if any, is correct?

Someone very close to me has lost both their parents and just recently gotten divorced from a very long (30+ years) marriage.  She has 2 adult children, neither of which can be counted on for anything (and this person needs help).  I wonder if she knew when she had them that they would never be there for her?  Who is worse off, the single person with children that still has to rely on friends or the single person without children who has to rely on friends?

You are right, we do change as we get older.  I hope I never regret my decision not to have children.  But at the same time, I think my friend regrets her decision to have them.

Honestly, I do not know the answer to any of these questions.  Just pondering......


----------



## kennancat

freemore said:


> When I was in my child bearing years I didn't really think I needed children but mostly it was my husband who said he didn't really want any children.  When we turned 40, he decided he didn't really need me either and he married a younger woman and had a child with her. By the time I was in my 40s I had done pretty much everything I wanted to do in my life, I had traveled, found out who I was, got my degree, had my career, was married for 20 years but I still didn't really feel a need for children.  But now I am 66 and both of my parents have passed away.  Let me tell you when you lose both of your parents, you will wish that you had children and grandchildren.  What I have learned in my 66 years is that my family was the most important thing in my life, I just didn't know it at the time.  It took me a long time to realize how important family is.  You will change as you grow older, what is most important to you now most likely won't be what is most important to you 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, or 70 years from now.  So enjoy your life now and what is important to you now, but keep in mind that you will change as you get older, and what you want out of life will change as you get older, but more importantly keep in mind that you can't go back and change it.


*
Whoa, Whoa, Whoa! *I just did a quick search on freemore's other posts. Sorry to be paranoid, but we get a lot of trolls on this thread. Found these interesting:

From 2/26/2007:


freemore said:


> My husband and I are retirement age and I was wondering how many people do you think our age make use of the disboards?  I find the disboards so helpful in so many ways.  Thanks to all.
> Freemore



From 2/4/2007:


freemore said:


> My granddaughters, age 12 and 3 are going to Disney on March 1st. (Just found out about this today.)  Is lit likely they can still reserve a character breakfast and which ones would you suggest?
> Thanks Freemore



I'm really hoping that you have remarried and these are step-grandchildren.


----------



## aclov

jojoandhb said:


> I saw this topic and found it interesting. I used to be one of those people who didn't want to have kids. When I was getting my first college degree, my fellow classmates would get really mad at me and say I was selfish because I wanted a career and to travel without worrying about children. I also just didn't like kids. I thought they were loud, messy, and just bratty. I worked for a while as a photographer, and I often took pictures of children. That made me hate parents and not want to be one. Well, 2 weeks after graduation, I found out I was pregnant, and I was on birth control. I thought about abortion, but I couldn't go through with it, so I had the baby. Turns out I ended up with the best baby in the whole world. I wouldn't trade her for anything. I think it's one of those things you have to experience to understand. I'm a bit unconventional as a mother mostly because I didn't have one of my own so I'm not sure what I should be doing. I just wing it and play a lot of dress up and go to the zoo and read books a lot. I just try to picture what I would want if I were a kid again. I don't have any friends with kids, so I don't know anyone who lost their identity when they had kids, but I would think there was something wrong with people like that BEFORE they became a parent. I just wanted to say that I was one of you until I had my daughter. I have a different perspective now, although you couldn't pay me to have another child! One is more than enough.



This happened to my best friend, she got pregnant at age 20 and had her son.   She said her son probably saved her from REALLY messing up her life.   Her son started living with his dad when he became a teenager but she's very much involved with him.  Up until this day, she still does not like children, she says they make her nervous.    She rather be around animals since that is her passion.


----------



## freemore

kennancat said:


> Growing up, my parents knew a couple who went through a very similar experience. My question would be even if you had the power to change this part of your life, would you really have wanted to have kids with your ex-DH? He sounds like a jerk.
> 
> I agree that family is very important. However, it's no guarantee that you won't be alone in your old age. My grandmother has outlived 2 of her 3 children. She and my mother (the surviving child) are not close, nor is she particularly close to any of her grandchildren. I don't know if she's lonely or not, but it definitely shows me that you can't count on other people to complete your life and provide you with happiness.
> 
> Certainly - this is true in all decisions, not just about having children. Hindsight is 20/20, as they say. You make the best decision you can based on the information you have at the time and hope it was the right one. As many have said here, we'd "rather regret not having children than regret having them." Bottom line for me - I'm still on the fence about the whole thing and I am afraid of ending up alone. Nonetheless, I do not want to make the choice to have children out of fear. If DH and I do decide we want them, it will be a decision based on love, not fear.



You sound like a wise person.  I guess I left the wrong impression though, I didn't mean that I was afraid of being alone,   Actually I have been happily married to my second husband for the last 10 years and I have three wonderful step children and 4 wonderful granddaughters.  The point I was really trying to make is after all is said and done, the growing up, the living to be the best you can be, and experiencing the best that life has to offer, family whatever form it takes, to me is the most important thing to cherish.


----------



## kennancat

freemore said:


> You sound like a wise person.  I guess I left the wrong impression though, I didn't mean that I was afraid of being alone,   Actually I have been happily married to my second husband for the last 10 years and I have three wonderful step children and 4 wonderful granddaughters.  The point I was really trying to make is after all is said and done, the growing up, the living to be the best you can be, and experiencing the best that life has to offer, family whatever form it takes, to me is the most important thing to cherish.


Thanks for coming back. Sorry about my last set of posts - we get a number of people to this thread who like to tell us how we're selfish idiots   So I'm definitely a little sensitive and became suspicious when I saw your other posts. Glad to hear things have worked out for you for what sounds to be the best in the end.

ETA: Just wanted to add that my parents' friends who went through a similar thing - the husband's still not happy. Hmm, you've changed wives and have the same problems? Maybe it's you!


----------



## Muushka

Wow, you guys are great!  I am so glad this got straightened out before it got nasty!  Good job!


----------



## freemore

kennancat said:


> *
> Whoa, Whoa, Whoa! *I just did a quick search on freemore's other posts. Sorry to be paranoid, but we get a lot of trolls on this thread. Found these interesting:
> 
> From 2/26/2007:
> 
> 
> From 2/4/2007:
> 
> 
> I'm really hoping that you have remarried and these are step-grandchildren.



Yup, that's me and my step-granddaughters had a wonderful time at Disney.  I don't call them step children or step granddaughters though.  They all had a wonderful time at Disney.


----------



## shazy03

kennancat said:


> Growing up, my parents knew a couple who went through a very similar experience. My question would be even if you had the power to change this part of your life, would you really have wanted to have kids with your ex-DH? He sounds like a jerk.
> 
> I agree that family is very important. However, it's no guarantee that you won't be alone in your old age. My grandmother has outlived 2 of her 3 children. She and my mother (the surviving child) are not close, nor is she particularly close to any of her grandchildren. I don't know if she's lonely or not, but it definitely shows me that you can't count on other people to complete your life and provide you with happiness.
> 
> Certainly - this is true in all decisions, not just about having children. Hindsight is 20/20, as they say. You make the best decision you can based on the information you have at the time and hope it was the right one. As many have said here, we'd "rather regret not having children than regret having them." Bottom line for me - I'm still on the fence about the whole thing and I am afraid of ending up alone. Nonetheless, I do not want to make the choice to have children out of fear. If DH and I do decide we want them, it will be a decision based on love, not fear.



I agree, with my experience in life, my real mother walked out on my father when I was 3yrs old, leaving my father to bring up my sister who was 18months old and myself, this was in the early 1970's.  Sadly my father died of a heart attack in 1986 aged 36 years old. I have never seen my real mother.  I have made the decison not to have children I am now 36 years old even to the extreme decision of being sterlized last year.  I live my life to the full with my husband.  You will never know who will be with you to walk your path through life. My adopted mum who took me on from being in care is a manager of a day cenre for elderly people who sees daily the sadness of her elderly clients being left alone in life by their children and famlies who they thought would be them for them now in their later years. Live each day and never have regrets


----------



## druidia

> Well, 2 weeks after graduation, I found out I was pregnant, and I was on birth control. I thought about abortion, but I couldn't go through with it, so I had the baby. Turns out I ended up with the best baby in the whole world.



I have always said to my friends that if this happened to me, I would have the child.  If, despite my best efforts (and I don't mean 'oops, I must have missed that pill, silly me') we still turned up preggers, I would keep it because someone is trying to tell me something and I need to listen up.

My DH and I have not made a permanent decision on this as of yet.  We thought we had, and lately we find ourselves looking over the fence to see if this is something we want to do.  We both feel like family is very important to us.  I just worry about the absolute permanence of it all.  If you have a child, there's no going back.  Is it something I can handle?  I just don't know, and I don't know if I'll ever be certain, so that keeps me on the CF side.


----------



## kennancat

druidia said:


> My DH and I have not made a permanent decision on this as of yet.  We thought we had, and lately we find ourselves looking over the fence to see if this is something we want to do.  We both feel like family is very important to us.  I just worry about the absolute permanence of it all.  If you have a child, there's no going back.  Is it something I can handle?  I just don't know, and I don't know if I'll ever be certain, so that keeps me on the CF side.


I feel pretty much the same as you've described. I don't know that I'll ever feel 100% one way or the other, which is frustrating to me. I like certainty, darnit! 

By the way, I was a Seabreeze Point bride too! We did our dessert party at UK, since we didn't have enough guests for the other areas.


----------



## dolcezena

OK, I gotta pipe up - this has been bugging me since last night. I'm not trying to speak for everyone who's posted on this thread, (or even just read it), nor is it an "attack" on anyone who's posted recently. But I really need to get something off my chest. 

I know it's wandered severely OT at times, but the point of this thread was for people who have _chosen_ not to have children. The reasons for this are varied & frequently very personal. Maybe there's been unsuccessful pregnancies in the past & they've chosen not to put themselves through the physical, emotional & financial rollercoaster of trying to conceive via medical science. Or they're unwilling/unable to become an adoptive parent. Or they've chosen not to bring a child into the world in the state that's it's currently in. Perhaps they've come from a home life that's made them decide they don't want a child. Or maybe it's just because they have chosen life goals other than forming their own little nuclear family. 

Whatever the reasons, I was thrilled to find a "place" where I wasn't going to be judged, or have people tell me what a void was going to be in my life because of mine (& my SO's) decision NOT to have children. In a society that seems to think that there's something "wrong" with people who have chosen not to procreate, it was a relief to know that we weren't the only ones. 

I have no intention, or desire to become a parent. I'm 35 now, I had an unplanned pregnancy 10 years ago & chose to place the child for adoption. I would make the same decision again today. Even the birth of my little sister's daughter & her recent 1st birthday has not changed my mind. One of the many reasons I'm with my SO is because he also does not want children - we both knew that going in, & it is a continuing factor in our continued relationship. Deciding when you're young not to have children isn't necessarily a lifelong decision to never have them. People change, times change - but for some people being childless is a choice, not a dream that never became fulfilled, like an ambition to be a ballerina.

There is plenty of support out there for people who want children, but can't have them - there's not much for those of us who don't have kids by choice. I'm truly happy that some people have found happiness by accepting the arrival of a child in their life - there's too many people in this world who have children & don't appreciate them. I like kids, I'm actually very good with them - yet another reason I'm constantly hearing "what do you mean you're not having kids? You're so good with them!" I like hot fudge sundaes too, but I don't want them in my life 24/7! 

So, since I've rambled on quite enough, if you'd like to hang out here, need a DW question answered about what to do when the kids are in those babysitting clubs, need some wine advice, or want to torment yourself with the fast-paced, glamorous lifestyle that CF couples have, then welcome & nice to have you here!

(I feel better now, thanks)


----------



## kennancat

dolcezena said:


> I like hot fudge sundaes too, but I don't want them in my life 24/7!


Now that's just crazy talk there.


----------



## HockeyKat

dolcezena, I am 100% with you.

As well-meaning and non-troll-like as some of the posts have been lately, I still am a bit put off by the "you will wind up old and alone" and "you don't understand unless you are a parent" posts.  I get plenty of that from the offline people (parents and coworkers) in my life, and this thread is really for those of us that, like dolcezna said, have deliberately CHOSEN a child-free life.  

I am 31, married to a man who is 36, and neither of us have ever wanted children.  If he decides in his 40s to marry a younger woman to have kids with her (doubtful since his previous marriage ended because SHE wanted kids), well, more power to him but I will be FINE alone.  I have built my career and my life to be my own, not around a husband or children.  My husband adds much to my life and I am glad I found him and married, but I always considered that a blessing, not a necessity.

Sure, I can occasionally see the appeal to others, and don't begrudge them their kids (unlike DH who hates all kids).   I wish I got the same courtesy from others.

Also, while "family" is important to some, to others, family is only a term that means blood relative.   I love my parents, and my in-laws, but not everyone is lucky enough to have that.


----------



## LoveStitch626

HockeyKat said:


> Also, while "family" is important to some, to others, family is only a term that means blood relative.   I love my parents, and my in-laws, but not everyone is lucky enough to have that.



A family is also what you create. While I'm not close to my blood family, I've got a pretty nice family. It's the friends closest to us that we know, without a doubt, are gonna be around come hell or high water. Kids or no kids. 

"This is my family. I found it, all on my own. It's little and broken but still good. Yeah, still good".

Like last night... LOL I love my best friend to death and she's definately Ohana. I was playing my new Cooking Mama game for Wii. We had such a sister moment last night. She kept telling me how I needed to be doing something. Finally I was like "dammit! Don't make me slug you. Let me figure it out on my OWN.. you're makin me nervous with your constant yapping like a freakin chihuahua". LOL She looked at me and kind of made a face so I stuck my tongue out at her. LOL If ya ask me.. THAT'S family right there. Most friends would be like "whatever" and leave.


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## HockeyKat

Definitely LoveStitch, I totally agree.  In fact, what you posted is what I really meant to say by that, it was just a bit early in the AM for me and it came out wrong!


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## LoveStitch626

HockeyKat said:


> Definitely LoveStitch, I totally agree.  In fact, what you posted is what I really meant to say by that, it was just a bit early in the AM for me and it came out wrong!



 Usually I'm the one that can't get my point across clearly! Glad I could help ya out there.


----------



## snusnu

I wonder how many of you other CF couples are like us.  We are surrounded by mainly other CF couples.  We only have one couple among our friends who have a child, with another on the way.  My brother and his wife have three (!) whom I adore with all of my heart, but I balk at attending a party or function when I know all of their friends are going to be there, because they all have multiple children.  The insanity is just too much for me.  We are travelling to WDW with two other couples, my DH's college roomates and their wives, in December, and I love going at an adult pace, doing adult things, etc.  I simply don't feel that anything is lacking.  I will miss my birds when I'm on the trip, though.  My little poopers. Can I talk about them without being nauseating?


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## HockeyKat

snusnu, you have just described utopia for me.

Unfortunately, we are the last of our non-breeder couple friends, and our single friends are of the variety that will likly remain single (35+ and strange).  We, like you, prefer adult-only events.  

So, our lives pretty much contain us and our kitty.


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## snusnu

HockeyKat said:


> snusnu, you have just described utopia for me.
> 
> Unfortunately, we are the last of our non-breeder couple friends, and our single friends are of the variety that will likly remain single (35+ and strange).  We, like you, prefer adult-only events.
> 
> So, our lives pretty much contain us and our kitty.



Hee.  We describe one of our 35+ and single (by choice) friends that way.  She's just so...so...odd.  Sweet, but odd.  

One half of one of the CF couples we'll be travelling with is so anti-child that she won't even go to movies anymore, unless they're at night and rated R.  Disneyland is the only place she can tolerate quantities of them, so we're hoping that WDW will work the same magic.


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## LoveStitch626

snusnu said:


> One half of one of the CF couples we'll be travelling with is so anti-child that she won't even go to movies anymore, unless they're at night and rated R.  Disneyland is the only place she can tolerate quantities of them, so we're hoping that WDW will work the same magic.




LOL Most likely! I rarely notice the kids at WDW anymore unless they're right there. There was one little girl sitting with her parents in front of us waiting for Fantasmic. My MIL was talking to her mom and another lady next to us. The little girl was the sweetest thing I'd seen in a LONG time. She had one of those whirlygig light up toys and she was passing it to all of us in that little group to try it out. Definately been taught sharing. She wasn't loud or obnoxious but very quiet and just a sweet little thing. Funny thing though, we were all having horrible visions in our head about that toy because this little girl had the fullest head of curly hair you could imagine. 

As far as friends w/ kids... the lines are being drawn in the sand now as we speak w/ my circle. The friend throwing the shower for herself this weekend (posted a couple weeks ago about this griping) is on her 3rd. Found out this week DH's best friend knocked his wife of 2 months up. They were only dating 2 months before they decided to get married.  They're thinking it's twins. Can you say doomed marriage? OH!! The kicker... they've told his sister (my best friend) she can move in & help with the kids.   LOL She's one of the single/CF types. I couldn't believe the gaul of them. They basically want to be able to have their fun life and not be bothered w/ kids so hey.. why not get Auntie Em to come and be a nanny?  Oh man... AND Dh's best friend couldn't even sack up and tell him in person. I found out on her myspace blog!!!  

Have fun with that one guys!!!


----------



## Hixski

LoveStitch626 said:


> LOL Most likely! I rarely notice the kids at WDW anymore unless they're right there. There was one little girl sitting with her parents in front of us waiting for Fantasmic. My MIL was talking to her mom and another lady next to us. The little girl was the sweetest thing I'd seen in a LONG time. She had one of those whirlygig light up toys and she was passing it to all of us in that little group to try it out. Definately been taught sharing. She wasn't loud or obnoxious but very quiet and just a sweet little thing. Funny thing though, we were all having horrible visions in our head about that toy because this little girl had the fullest head of curly hair you could imagine.
> 
> As far as friends w/ kids... the lines are being drawn in the sand now as we speak w/ my circle. The friend throwing the shower for herself this weekend (posted a couple weeks ago about this griping) is on her 3rd. Found out this week DH's best friend knocked his wife of 2 months up. They were only dating 2 months before they decided to get married.  They're thinking it's twins. Can you say doomed marriage? OH!! The kicker... they've told his sister (my best friend) she can move in & help with the kids.   LOL She's one of the single/CF types. I couldn't believe the gaul of them. They basically want to be able to have their fun life and not be bothered w/ kids so hey.. why not get Auntie Em to come and be a nanny?  Oh man... AND Dh's best friend couldn't even sack up and tell him in person. I found out on her myspace blog!!!
> 
> Have fun with that one guys!!!



All this makes me glad that I am 47. Everyone we know that has kids have ones that are drinking age at this point. Or close to it. We only have one set of friends that have small children. They get a babysitter any time we get together. They need to keep their sanity too.


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## kennancat

snusnu - I just have to say that anybody who uses a Jane Austen quote in their sig wins points in my book  I'm not sure if I should admit it, but I am a member of the Jane Austen Society of North America.


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## kennancat

LoveStitch626 said:


> As far as friends w/ kids... the lines are being drawn in the sand now as we speak w/ my circle.


It's hard to judge for me - we have a few different circles. Used to have one large group of friends, but things have changed there - one couple moved and eventually divorced, another had a falling out with most of the other people. The remaining married couple has kids, and they're usually not too bad about it, but I still get the feeling they're expecting us to wake up one day and want kids. We see another group of friends (we're the newbies in that one) occasionally, and a couple of them are just starting to have kids. But still, the majority are without. I do wonder sometimes if couple not having children make up a larger proportion of the population than we realize. I fully expect "sky is falling" articles in 5 to 10 years lamenting the number of couples choosing to be childfree. 




LoveStitch626 said:


> OH!! The kicker... they've told his sister (my best friend) she can move in & help with the kids.


So I have to ask - what did she say to this???


----------



## dolcezena

Hey All!

I've just realized we're pretty lucky - most of our friends are of the CF mindset too (at least at the moment, some of them are only in their early 20's). I suppose that might change, but for now the only thing we dread are my family get-togethers. The kind when my mom's side of the family gets together - all 40 of us or so. Well, now my cousins are having kids, ranging in age from 3 mo to 5 years. (The kids, not my cousins  ) I think there's about 8 of them now. , with more on the way. 

Just saw an interesting segment on 20/20 - about a restaurant owner who got tired of young kids misbehaving in his restaurant, so posted a sign saying kids were welcome, but they were expected to behave & use their indoor voices. Apparently a lot of parents initially flipped, (couldn't help thinking of the "mommy of's"  ) & there were all kinds of news articles (worldwide) about this child-hating restauranteur. But then he started getting all kinds of SUPPORTING letters & articles & now his place is doing better than ever - WITH well-behaved children in it! Now that's a place I would go!


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## Hixski

dolcezena said:


> Hey All!
> 
> I've just realized we're pretty lucky - most of our friends are of the CF mindset too (at least at the moment, some of them are only in their early 20's). I suppose that might change, but for now the only thing we dread are my family get-togethers. The kind when my mom's side of the family gets together - all 40 of us or so. Well, now my cousins are having kids, ranging in age from 3 mo to 5 years. (The kids, not my cousins  ) I think there's about 8 of them now. , with more on the way.
> 
> Just saw an interesting segment on 20/20 - about a restaurant owner who got tired of young kids misbehaving in his restaurant, so posted a sign saying kids were welcome, but they were expected to behave & use their indoor voices. Apparently a lot of parents initially flipped, (couldn't help thinking of the "mommy of's"  ) & there were all kinds of news articles (worldwide) about this child-hating restauranteur. But then he started getting all kinds of SUPPORTING letters & articles & now his place is doing better than ever - WITH well-behaved children in it! Now that's a place I would go!



Sounds like the Air Tran toddler incident. A few people thought Air Tran was wrong but thousands of other supported Air Tran. My personal quest is to keep kids off the bar stools at the bar. I don't give a rats butt if it is Applebees, it is a BAR you are trying to park your 5yr old at. Ok, vent over. 

I wish more restaurants would take this attitude. I don't have any problems with kids in restaurants as long as they behave. I expect the adults to behave too.


----------



## LoveStitch626

kennancat said:


> So I have to ask - what did she say to this???



Oh she gave em a great big salute lol...each time they asked


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## PghLybrt

dolcezena said:


> Just saw an interesting segment on 20/20 - about a restaurant owner who got tired of young kids misbehaving in his restaurant, so posted a sign saying kids were welcome, but they were expected to behave & use their indoor voices. Apparently a lot of parents initially flipped, (couldn't help thinking of the "mommy of's"  ) & there were all kinds of news articles (worldwide) about this child-hating restauranteur. But then he started getting all kinds of SUPPORTING letters & articles & now his place is doing better than ever - WITH well-behaved children in it! Now that's a place I would go!




I started a thread on the community board about this because as a business owner I was quite interested on how people felt was the  correct way to handle the situation.  I have been pleased with the amount of parents who have posted saying they see nothing wrong with the sign..


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## LoveStitch626

PghLybrt said:


> I started a thread on the community board about this because as a business owner I was quite interested on how people felt was the  correct way to handle the situation.  I have been pleased with the amount of parents who have posted saying they see nothing wrong with the sign..



LOL Probably because everyone thinks their little darlin is well behaved.


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## LuluLovesDisney

PghLybrt said:


> I started a thread on the community board about this because as a business owner I was quite interested on how people felt was the  correct way to handle the situation.  I have been pleased with the amount of parents who have posted saying they see nothing wrong with the sign..



Not a parent, but I wish those signs hung (and were enforced) everywhere! A girl at the movies on Friday threw popcorn at people the whole time. Finally, when she threw a lid/straw, I told her firmly "Don't throw things". The parent had the audacity to yell at me! (after her daughter told her - she was actually sitting a row behind her kids) She told me don't speak to a child that way. I told her to watch her child, and to be quiet, she was a in a movie theatre. Then I ignored her as she screamed. Eventually she quieted down. Too bad there's no security at that theatre or I would have gotten them.


----------



## druidia

LuluLovesDisney said:


> Not a parent, but I wish those signs hung (and were enforced) everywhere! A girl at the movies on Friday threw popcorn at people the whole time. Finally, when she threw a lid/straw, I told her firmly "Don't throw things". The parent had the audacity to yell at me! (after her daughter told her - she was actually sitting a row behind her kids) She told me don't speak to a child that way. I told her to watch her child, and to be quiet, she was a in a movie theatre. Then I ignored her as she screamed. Eventually she quieted down. Too bad there's no security at that theatre or I would have gotten them.



***??!!  This is exactly why we never go to the movies!!  DH can't stand to pay so much to listen to all of the bratty crying kids with the parents who won't get a babysitter, and tweens with their cell phones with the missing 'off' button.   

If my kid acted like that in a movie theater, I would tan their hide.  Oh, wait, I said I wouldn't be a spanker.   I'll have to think of something else.  It is precisely that type of behavior that makes me wonder if I could handle being a parent.  I know I'm not the most patient person in the world, and I don't want to take it out on my kid.


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## druidia

kennancat said:


> I feel pretty much the same as you've described. I don't know that I'll ever feel 100% one way or the other, which is frustrating to me. I like certainty, darnit!
> 
> By the way, I was a Seabreeze Point bride too! We did our dessert party at UK, since we didn't have enough guests for the other areas.



I loved having our wedding there!  We did our reception at FI so we could see Illuminations with our guests.  It was so fabulous and by far one of the happiest days of our lives!   

DH just told me that he has booked a 4 day trip for our 2 year anniversary next month.  I can barely contain myself since we haven't been back since December.  I'm jonesing!!!   

On the CF decision, I really never thought I would find myself doubting.  We were all ready to take care of the possiblity, IYKWIM, and started talking more about it and stopped the process.  I like certainty as well, but finality scares me.  We would never adopt, so this is the only chance if we decide to go forward.  It is just so _permanent_, and that scares me.  So far though, we are very happy with our CF lives, and have been for a long time.  We enjoy spoiling our furbaby kitties Motor & Stitch!!


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## LoveStitch626

druidia said:


> ***??!!  This is exactly why we never go to the movies!!  DH can't stand to pay so much to listen to all of the bratty crying kids with the parents who won't get a babysitter, and tweens with their cell phones with the missing 'off' button.
> 
> If my kid acted like that in a movie theater, I would tan their hide.  Oh, wait, I said I wouldn't be a spanker.   I'll have to think of something else.  It is precisely that type of behavior that makes me wonder if I could handle being a parent.  I know I'm not the most patient person in the world, and I don't want to take it out on my kid.



Don't yall have an Alamo Drafthouse movie theatre? No I guess not. They're only in Texas (I just looked). This is an awesome theatre. Tables are set up in the theatre and you can order food/beer restaurant style. If a brat is acting up, you can write it down and put it in your flag that sits in the middle of the table (used for ordering/flagging down your server) and they take care of it and it's annonymous! Very cool place. Not to mention, they show other things besides new releases. They'll do old movies, RHPS, sports events, that sort of thing.


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## WDWguru

We have a brew pub theater here in Salt Lake called Brewvies. It's not very big, but they have two theaters and all the rows have little tables attached to the row in front of them. You order food before you go in and get a number, then when your number lights up on a little sign in the theater, you go out and grab it. Best thing is, it's a pub, so NOBODY under 21 is allowed in!

It's not the best theater for picture or sound, but it's a great place to catch a movie.


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## Hixski

druidia said:


> I loved having our wedding there!  We did our reception at FI so we could see Illuminations with our guests.  It was so fabulous and by far one of the happiest days of our lives!
> 
> DH just told me that he has booked a 4 day trip for our 2 year anniversary next month.  I can barely contain myself since we haven't been back since December.  I'm jonesing!!!
> 
> On the CF decision, I really never thought I would find myself doubting.  We were all ready to take care of the possiblity, IYKWIM, and started talking more about it and stopped the process.  I like certainty as well, but finality scares me.  We would never adopt, so this is the only chance if we decide to go forward.  It is just so _permanent_, and that scares me.  So far though, we are very happy with our CF lives, and have been for a long time.  We enjoy spoiling our furbaby kitties Motor & Stitch!!



I think I am one of the older people here on this thread. I am 47, DH is 48. We have been CF long enough now to realize that it was meant to be for us. We just went out to lunch today with a younger friend of mine. (She is 30) She brought her 11yr old DD with her as always. Her DD just loves us. We get in our kid fixes like that.

DH and I have been together for 25 yrs. In that time we have seen almost everyone we know have children. Most now tell us they envy us. Some even go so far to say they wish they would have done it differently. Several have commented that they had children because they thought that was what they were "supposed" to do. I don't think most people will admit these things to another parent but they will to someone CF. We like it here on the "dark side".


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## Muushka

I am 53, husband is a little younger.  Still very happy we did not choose the child route.


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## aclov

dolcezena said:


> Just saw an interesting segment on 20/20 - about a restaurant owner who got tired of young kids misbehaving in his restaurant, so posted a sign saying kids were welcome, but they were expected to behave & use their indoor voices. Apparently a lot of parents initially flipped, (couldn't help thinking of the "mommy of's"  ) & there were all kinds of news articles (worldwide) about this child-hating restauranteur. But then he started getting all kinds of SUPPORTING letters & articles & now his place is doing better than ever - WITH well-behaved children in it! Now that's a place I would go!



I saw that it too!  I think it's interesting that parents put the blinders on  when it comes to their children's behavior.   I went to Chili's with two friends, one has 3 kids the other has 2.   We were sitting behind another group with two women and about 4 kids.   My friend's two year old kept hanging on the booth across from us, so the host comes with a couple (man and woman) to seat them there.  He asks the man "Is this okay?"  The man answers "No! I don't want to be around kids"    So the host takes them to another booth.     My friend than says "Gosh, that was rude!" and repeats what the man said.   I say "Why is that rude? He doesn't want to be around kids.   We don't know if him and his wife left THEIR kids at home for a quiet evening out or maybe he doesn't have kids and isn't used to them.  I guess he just wants to enjoy his meal"   
My friend 10 years ago would have reacted the same way and wouldn't have wanted to be seated aroud kids but now that she's a mom she expects EVERYONE to love children.


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## HockeyKat

aclov said:


> I saw that it too!  I think it's interesting that parents put the blinders on  when it comes to their children's behavior.   I went to Chili's with two friends, one has 3 kids the other has 2.   We were sitting behind another group with two women and about 4 kids.   My friend's two year old kept hanging on the booth across from us, so the host comes with a couple (man and woman) to seat them there.  He asks the man "Is this okay?"  The man answers "No! I don't want to be around kids"    So the host takes them to another booth.     My friend than says "Gosh, that was rude!" and repeats what the man said.   I say "Why is that rude? He doesn't want to be around kids.   We don't know if him and his wife left THEIR kids at home for a quiet evening out or maybe he doesn't have kids and isn't used to them.  I guess he just wants to enjoy his meal"
> My friend 10 years ago would have reacted the same way and wouldn't have wanted to be seated aroud kids but now that she's a mom she expects EVERYONE to love children.




Gee, was that my DH??   

We have actually been known to do exactly that, although I probably wouldn't be quite that blunt about it.  I have no desire to be seated next to someone else's kids or have their 2 yr old hang over the booth at me.   Honestly, if the place has a linen tablecloth and linen napkins  and a wine list (anything above family restuarant level), I expect if you bring your kids that they should act accordingly and SIT in their chair and eat like normal human beings, or you should leave them at home.   If you bring a baby and it cries anywhere non-fast-food, take it out.   My brother brought my 6 mo old nephew to a nice restaurant and it cried and he is a heathen, so *I* took it out.

Maybe I (at 31) was raised in a strict household, but even in our own house my father required my brother and I to sit at the dinner table, napkin in lap, and eat food with utensils.  We were required to sit until everyone was done, help my mom clear the table, and then we were allowed to watch tv, play, etc.  If we didn't eat what my mom prepared, we went hungry.  If we protested, we were sent to our rooms with no dinner.   Obviously, the upbringing didn't take with my brother!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

HockeyKat said:


> Maybe I (at 31) was raised in a strict household, but even in our own house my father required my brother and I to sit at the dinner table, napkin in lap, and eat food with utensils.  We were required to sit until everyone was done, help my mom clear the table, and then we were allowed to watch tv, play, etc.  If we didn't eat what my mom prepared, we went hungry.  If we protested, we were sent to our rooms with no dinner.   Obviously, the upbringing didn't take with my brother!!



Wow, this is my brother!  Out of 3 kids, we have a sister too, he was the one that has children, and they are slobs!  My mother was very picky about being clean, and organized and my father was like yours, teaching to wipe mouths with a napkin, no burping, farting, whistling, etc. at the table.  It is amazing how many times we've been to dinner with them and the kids wipe their mouths across their sleeves, and have burping contests at 10 & 12 years old!  Oh, and they are girls!  I honestly feel he's being rebellious in a sense because he felt my father was too strict and he didn't want to do that to his children.  Little did he realize how they look without manners!

Okay, off my soapbox......

My sister & I when going out for dinner with our DH's often ask to be seated away from families with small chidren for the exact reason as the previous poster.  But I will also say that there have been times that we will encounter a family with well-behaved children.  Good going mom & dad!


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## maddhatir

Hey- I haven't posted for a while- I am still lurking though. Not much kid stuff has been annoying me lately 

I did want to say- wow- I would love to have those types of movie "theaters" that some of you have.

DH and I try and go to the movie theater where they play movies that no young kids would want to see anyway I am talking about the movies that are usually up for some kind of an award- not usually your major blockbuster ( I wanted to clarify incase some of you may be thinking "adult" )That is the only choice we have if we want to go to the movies- b/c I can't stand going to the movies with "tweens" BTW- *** is that word all about anyway, or teens- they are just so freaking annoying all of the time- I get chest pains just listening to them!!!


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## PatriciaH

snusnu said:


> I wonder how many of you other CF couples are like us.  We are surrounded by mainly other CF couples.  We only have one couple among our friends who have a child, with another on the way.



Most of our friends here in Florida are child-free. We go out a lot with two married couples in their 30's like us that do not want children. We also have a lot of single friends in their 20's and 30's that never want kids. Only one of our friends has a child and she is 13 and a nice kid. One of our younger friends (23) wants a child at some point but not for a while. We are meeting a lot of people that never want kids! It is wonderful because we always have someone to hang out with


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## druidia

LoveStitch626 said:


> Don't yall have an Alamo Drafthouse movie theatre? No I guess not. They're only in Texas (I just looked). This is an awesome theatre. Tables are set up in the theatre and you can order food/beer restaurant style. If a brat is acting up, you can write it down and put it in your flag that sits in the middle of the table (used for ordering/flagging down your server) and they take care of it and it's annonymous! Very cool place. Not to mention, they show other things besides new releases. They'll do old movies, RHPS, sports events, that sort of thing.



We used to have something like that, but never with the flags in the tables.  That would be fantastic!  They are more like a concession window where you place an order (for pizza) and they call your name, so no servers.  We do have another dine in theater (actually where DH and I had our first date), but it is in a very family oriented neighborhood and you would be thrown out the door if you complained about someone's precious poo misbehaving.  

What I don't get is that people who have children have made a _*choice*_.  That choice has *consequences*.  Those consequences include the fact that you no longer do all of the adult things you used to do and have the free time that you took for granted previously.  No more nights out without a babysitter, etc.  I don't understand those parents who get so bristled when people get annoyed at their screaming, bored kids because "they have a right to be out, too."  All of those around you have a right to enjoy their hard earned $$ on a night out, too, without dealing with your kids.  

OK, I'm down now.


----------



## druidia

Hixski said:


> I think I am one of the older people here on this thread. I am 47, DH is 48. We have been CF long enough now to realize that it was meant to be for us. We just went out to lunch today with a younger friend of mine. (She is 30) She brought her 11yr old DD with her as always. Her DD just loves us. We get in our kid fixes like that.
> 
> DH and I have been together for 25 yrs. In that time we have seen almost everyone we know have children. Most now tell us they envy us. Some even go so far to say they wish they would have done it differently. Several have commented that they had children because they thought that was what they were "supposed" to do. I don't think most people will admit these things to another parent but they will to someone CF. We like it here on the "dark side".




We have been together for 12 years, and initially considered kids, then mostly didn't, and now we're back to considering again, as we inch towards 40.  

I am so afraid of feeling like this:

*Most now tell us they envy us. Some even go so far to say they wish they would have done it differently.*

But on the flip side, I don't want to regret NOT having children.  I think I'm realizing what my true reasons are for not wanting them, and they don't seem so valid now.  Mostly, I'm just terrified of the commitment, but eager for it at the same time.  I'm terrified of giving up my free time, but then I wonder what I'm spending it on?  And so on and so forth...

I have never felt that it was something I was "supposed" to do, but I agree that many couples do.  I think I'm probably one of the most non-parent types that most of my friends and family know.

Choices, choices.

FWIW, I state right now before the Dissers that I would NEVER allow my child to act in such a manner that anonymous flags are warranted!  We rarely go to the movies now due to such obnoxious behavior; I would not allow my kid to behave that way in public.  We would be spending time at home until they could learn to behave properly.

If that means giving up the movies and nice restaurants for a while, so be it.  That's part of the *choice* we make.


----------



## LoveStitch626

druidia said:


> I don't understand those parents who get so bristled when people get annoyed at their screaming, bored kids because "they have a right to be out, too."



    To the parents: You shoulda thought of that before spawning 
To the kids: get a job.. pay some taxes THEN we'll talk about having rights  

And that's all this monster has to say about that one


----------



## dolcezena

druidia said:


> I don't understand those parents who get so bristled when people get annoyed at their screaming, bored kids because "they have a right to be out, too."



Isn't that why they invented those cheesy chuck places & restaurants like that? Seems like every time I turn around there's another "family-oriented" experience! Movie theatres, restaurants, malls...when will the insanity end?!?

OMG, I _need_ one of those movie theatres you can order drinks at here! Maybe then I can get DFi to take me to a movie! If I can dose him with enough liquor, I can get him to do anything! (Hence my planning out our wedding/disneymoon itinerary based on wineries & bars!!)


----------



## Poppinsme

Hello all.    Been married for almost 32 years now.  In fact celebrating our anni. at the Poly. later this year.  WooHoo!!   Oh yeah we are DINKs and proud.  Never regretted not having kids.  I'm 50 now and my DH is 63 so we have gone through pretty much every kind of comment you can think of.  And a lot of my friends now tell me they wish they'd never had children.  Interesting.  As far as giving your things away that you have acquired in life, well thats what friends are for.  When I die the majority of my wealth and possessions will go to my friends (or DH if he is still alive of course).  Do I regret not having children to pass my things off to, no.  I will say that we talked about adopting but didn't.  And I do love children just wanted to enjoy others and I take care of babies in my job.
There is nothing wrong with being childless.  Nothing.  And no guilt, ever.


----------



## dolcezena

Help me here people - I'm over-tired, over-caffeinated & feeling stupidly emotional - OMG, I think I'm a 3 y/o about to throw a temper tantrum. 

Why oh why did I have to find all these "emotional" threads in the state I'm in?

Quick, I need some fluffly chat!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

dolcezena said:


> Help me here people - I'm over-tired, over-caffeinated & feeling stupidly emotional - OMG, I think I'm a 3 y/o about to throw a temper tantrum.
> 
> Why oh why did I have to find all these "emotional" threads in the state I'm in?
> 
> Quick, I need some fluffly chat!



I'm always like that! I feel four on a good day. 

Here's the fluff:

          

They're all fluffy - esp. Stitch.


----------



## dolcezena

LuluLovesDisney said:


> Here's the fluff:
> 
> 
> 
> They're all fluffy - esp. Stitch.



Thanks for making me smile!


----------



## plgrn

*Enough said!!*


----------



## Disney Dee

OMG! Having raised 3 kids (all grown now) and running my own daycare for 28 yrs, that pic tells me why women over 50 do not have babies, and just thinking of having to clean up that mess reminds me why i gave up my daycare


----------



## maddhatir

Disney Dee said:


> OMG! Having raised 3 kids (all grown now) and running my own daycare for 28 yrs, that pic tells me why women over 50 do not have babies, and just thinking of having to clean up that mess reminds me why i gave up my daycare



Women over 50???-- There are tons of us out there who just started out NEVER wanting babies! We must have seen that pic in our future and just....knew!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

OMG. I would just die!!! 

Is that house paint?


----------



## Hixski

plgrn said:


> *Enough said!!*



All you fencesitters take note......should you decide not to be CF, that is your future.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> *Enough said!!*



Now if we were parents here... we would be saying...:Oh how cute"..........

I say......"better them than us!"


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Now if we were parents here... we would be saying...:Oh how cute"..........



Well, props to the mom of these two for having nerves of steel! Snapping a picture would be the last thing on my to-do list!!!


----------



## AlleyKat

plgrn said:


> *Enough said!!*


New leather couch...$4,000
New television...$2,000
New wood floor...$10,000

The satisfaction of spanking the crap out of these two...priceless!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

I think we should call that infomercial paint stripper company and give them a real test.


----------



## plgrn




----------



## elainemeyerovitz

ChisJo said:


> As for what others say to you, they don't realize how rude they are being. What if you were unable to have children, but really wanted them? How would they feel then, asking you those same questions?




As someone who tried every drug and invasive treatment out there for over 3 yrs, only to lose a set of twins and run out of insurance coverage, I can tell you the "when are you going to have children?"  question is the most painful one out there- even worse than a comment about weight.

so as someone who's been thru it, I NEVER ask people when they will have kids, I know better!


----------



## Liisa

Not to be a downer, but I needed some support...  I think many of us without kids end up with pets.  My DH and I have dogs.  We adopted our first dog (a beautiful Tibetan Mastiff pup) in 2001.  We named him Yeti.  He came home perfect and we absolutely fell in love with him (I'm sure you pet owners will understand).  Over the years, Yeti had quite a few issues... demodex when he was a pup, a severe allergic reaction to anything containing lamb (ended up at a gastroenterologist for that), lyme's disease, erlichia equine... we pretty much established that he had a very low immune system and just couldn't fight off anything.  At a year old, he had his first seizure.  Some of them were so violent that he broke some teeth while he was thrashing around (went to a dentist - one root canal and two pulled teeth later, good as new).  But the seizures got worse and by the time he was six, he was averaging a seizure episode once every four weeks and he was having cluster seizures.  All of these special needs made him even more dear to me - he needed us and we did everything we could to make him comfortable.  This past January, I was at Disney with my parents, DH was home with the dogs (Yeti was 6 years, and our female Pari - 2 years).  When I got home, we noticed that Yeti was acting "off" - but we couldn't pin point it (Sunday / Monday).  Called the vet and got him in the next day for a check up.  By Tuesday morning, his breathing was a bit raspy - but not consistently.  The vet checked him out, took his temp, he had a fever (105 - 103 is normal for a dog).  We sat at the vets while the pumped him with fluids to bring the fever down.  They sent him home with me.  I monitored him overnight.  By Weds am, his fever was up to 106, get him in the car and get to the vets.  For the next two days, I monitor him all night, the vet has him all day, fever goes up and down, and he starts vomiting, breathing very raspy.  Thursday, the vet takes x-rays... his lungs are filled with junk, and he has a condition called megaesophagus.  I bolt from work, drive to the vet, pick him up and drive like a bat out of (well, you get the point) to a critical care center about an hour and a half away.  He isn't moving or responding by the time we get there.  They wheel him in and he goes into the ICU.  After a very long three days where I was only allowed one 10 minute visit each day, the ICU called me at 2 in the morning (on the day after my birthday) to tell me that his temp had skyrocketed to 107 and his oxygen intake had dropped drastically.  They were going to watch him for a couple hours to see if he would normalize.  At 4 am, I got the call that he was suffering and there was nothing more they could do that wouldn't be a risk.  I was at the ICU by 4:15 am (my parents lived near to the clinic and I was able to stay with them through this ordeal) to say good-bye.  It is three months later and I'm handling this better (time does heal these pains).... but I still have my moments and today - for no reason at all - I'm missing him terribly.  Sorry to dump on all of you... it just helps to share....






Yeti is the puffy guy in black laying down (Pari, his sister) is behind him.


----------



## plgrn

Oh Liisa! I'm so sorry. I know what it's like to loose a beloved pet. We had to have the cat I grew up with for 13 years put down.   How is Paris handling the loss?

Yeti was a big gorgeous boy! If he was solid white Disney could have hired him to pose for pictures with people at the Everest attraction!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Liisa, I am so sorry for your loss! Yeti was a beautiful, beautiful dog. You must miss him terribly.

I just lost my sweet, sweet pitbull mix (14 1/2 years old) at the beginning of February and I am still grieving for him too.  It's very hard.  They give us their unconditional love, and we do the best we can for them, but their lives are so short!


----------



## Liisa

Thank you... I knew the DISers would be there for support!    Pari was not doing well at all.  She is four, Yeti was 6 years old (I think that is also part of my problem...I feel like he was taken way too soon.  These guys are supposed to live for 12 years on average.)  Anyway, Pari went into a depression.  She tends to be a very independent girl and she got very attached.  She wasn't eating well.  No surprise since she had been with him since we brought her home as a pup.  Here's the other half of the story...

In December, Tibetan Mastiff Rescue got a litter of four pups (long story re: why they ended up in rescue - needless to say, not all breeders are created equal).  We had taken one of the girls in as a foster pup.  She got adopted and is now living in Wisconsin.  After Yeti passed away, the woman who runs rescue (who is a friend of ours and has Pari's full sister and Yeti's father - small world amond the Tibetan Mastiff people) became concerned about Pari.  Of the four pups in rescue, one lone little boy remained without a home.  So out of my terrible story, we did manage to do good and that little boy came to find a home with us.  He is now a very happy, 67 pound, 6 months old bundle of joy!  We call him Khabo.    He is the reason I managed to get through the last few months....


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Thank you... I knew the DISers would be there for support!    Pari was not doing well at all.  She is four, Yeti was 6 years old (I think that is also part of my problem...I feel like he was taken way too soon.  These guys are supposed to live for 12 years on average.)  Anyway, Pari went into a depression.  She tends to be a very independent girl and she got very attached.  She wasn't eating well.  No surprise since she had been with him since we brought her home as a pup.  Here's the other half of the story...
> 
> In December, Tibetan Mastiff Rescue got a litter of four pups (long story re: why they ended up in rescue - needless to say, not all breeders are created equal).  We had taken one of the girls in as a foster pup.  She got adopted and is now living in Wisconsin.  After Yeti passed away, the woman who runs rescue (who is a friend of ours and has Pari's full sister and Yeti's father - small world amond the Tibetan Mastiff people) became concerned about Pari.  Of the four pups in rescue, one lone little boy remained without a home.  So out of my terrible story, we did manage to do good and that little boy came to find a home with us.  He is now a very happy, 67 pound, 6 months old bundle of joy!  We call him Khabo.    He is the reason I managed to get through the last few months....



I am so sorry to hear about your pup- he was beautiful and so is Pari--  It breaks my heart to think of an animal going through that much. I can't even have pets b/c both DH and I are so allergic- but I love animals. I became a vegetarian just b/c I can't even stand the thought of any animal hurting. 

Do you have any pics of your new little one Khabo?? (Well, I sure @ 67 lbs- not too little!) 

It seems the Tibetan Mastiff resembles the Newfoundland....They are my absolute favorite dog- if I could have pets I would have a Newfoundland....and a Chihuahua...


----------



## Hixski

Liisa said:


> Thank you... I knew the DISers would be there for support!    Pari was not doing well at all.  She is four, Yeti was 6 years old (I think that is also part of my problem...I feel like he was taken way too soon.  These guys are supposed to live for 12 years on average.)  Anyway, Pari went into a depression.  She tends to be a very independent girl and she got very attached.  She wasn't eating well.  No surprise since she had been with him since we brought her home as a pup.  Here's the other half of the story...
> 
> In December, Tibetan Mastiff Rescue got a litter of four pups (long story re: why they ended up in rescue - needless to say, not all breeders are created equal).  We had taken one of the girls in as a foster pup.  She got adopted and is now living in Wisconsin.  After Yeti passed away, the woman who runs rescue (who is a friend of ours and has Pari's full sister and Yeti's father - small world amond the Tibetan Mastiff people) became concerned about Pari.  Of the four pups in rescue, one lone little boy remained without a home.  So out of my terrible story, we did manage to do good and that little boy came to find a home with us.  He is now a very happy, 67 pound, 6 months old bundle of joy!  We call him Khabo.    He is the reason I managed to get through the last few months....



So sorry to hear about Yeti. Beautiful dog. I know the pain having had to put down our cocker Samantha. That was almost 10yrs ago and I still think about her. We have a golden retriever now named Duncan and he will be 10 in June. We have had him since he was a puppy and time has flown by. I worry once in a while about the fact he is getting old. But he still thinks he is a puppy. A slow, stiff puppy.......... Please post a picture of Khabo.


----------



## Liisa

plgrn - DH and I agree... if he was white, he could fill in for the Expedition Everest's Yeti.  Only, he had a bit better temper!  (Thank goodness...or he would have been a handful!)

Maddhatir - TM's are considered an ancient breed and are thought to be the founding dogs for several others (including newfies, bernese mountain dogs, saint bernards and others).  That is probably why my Yeti looked so much like a newfie.  A newfie and a chihuahua...?  That made me laugh!  Thanks!  I needed that!

And for everyone who was interested... here is a picture of my new little one - Khabo.  He was about 40 pounds in this picture (I haven't uploaded any new pictures of him, just mentally add on about 30 pounds - he's a BIG boy!).  Pardon the goofy puppy expression... they grow into these beautiful stately dogs... they just don't start out that way!   






Thank you all for your thoughts.  I needed this today.  Sometimes it just helps to talk about it.  

And as an aside, I may have some scratches on my furniture and an occassional "accident" in the house... but a woman I work with just had to bail her daughter out of jail for drug possession.  I LOVE MY DOGS!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Hi Liisa,

I just wanted to send well wishes your way, I'm so sorry to hear about Yeti.  And at the same time congratulations on your new addition, he's gorgeous!

DH & I have a dog and cat who are our children.  Veda, my dog will be 12 years old next month, she's a German Shepherd/Golden Retriever mix.  We got her as a pup when she was 12 weeks old.  Like *Hixski* worrying about her Duncan, I too have been worrying about Veda's age/health.  But I am very thankful we have had so many wonderful years with her.  And actually on her last check-up the vet said her eyes & teeth look great, and she sees her living until age 14!

Again, my thoughts are with you.


----------



## plgrn

What a gorgeous baby! I hope that Pari she can make friends with Khabo to help fill some of the void in her life. He looks like a sweetie!


----------



## Liisa

Yes, he's a sweetie.  And Pari fell completely in LOVE with him!     She's actually pretty obsessive about it and I have to start "putting them to bed" about an hour before I actually want to go to sleep...it takes them that long to settle down from playing.  If you ask me, Pari *knows* when its bedtime and starts to play with him just to prolong the process.  She's sneaky like that!

For those of you with aging fur-kids... take lots of pictures.  I have tons of pics of Yeti when he was a pup, but I got lazy about it as he got older.  I'm regretting that now.

And - to get back on topic - I think my family has finally conceded that DH and I are out of the running for children.  My aunt was talking to me yesterday and she said something along the lines of... well, you won't have to worry about money since you aren't having kids.  (Not the reason we aren't having kids, just a nice perk...allows us to spend money elsewhere...DVC, airfare, park tickets, restaurants - if only they new how expensive the Disney hobby can become!!!!)


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Yes, he's a sweetie.  And Pari fell completely in LOVE with him!     She's actually pretty obsessive about it and I have to start "putting them to bed" about an hour before I actually want to go to sleep...it takes them that long to settle down from playing.  If you ask me, Pari *knows* when its bedtime and starts to play with him just to prolong the process.  She's sneaky like that!



OMG- Khabo is adorable! 

And it sounds like you might need Nanny 911 for pups by the sounds of the bedtime problems in your house 

Man- on that show- none of those kids EVER want to go to sleep!


----------



## Liisa

Nanny 911 cracks me and DH up!  It was as if it were made for those of us who have decided not to have kids...  They could rename it... "Birth Control"!


----------



## plgrn

Liisa said:


> Nanny 911 cracks me and DH up!  It was as if it were made for those of us who have decided not to have kids...  They could rename it... "Birth Control"!



That's why I like it so much, but DH can't stand to watch. It grates on his nerves too bad and makes him want to throw something at the TV since he can't jump into the TV and teach those kids a lesson.


----------



## Hixski

Liisa said:


> Yes, he's a sweetie.  And Pari fell completely in LOVE with him!     She's actually pretty obsessive about it and I have to start "putting them to bed" about an hour before I actually want to go to sleep...it takes them that long to settle down from playing.  If you ask me, Pari *knows* when its bedtime and starts to play with him just to prolong the process.  She's sneaky like that!
> 
> For those of you with aging fur-kids... take lots of pictures.  I have tons of pics of Yeti when he was a pup, but I got lazy about it as he got older.  I'm regretting that now.
> 
> And - to get back on topic - I think my family has finally conceded that DH and I are out of the running for children.  My aunt was talking to me yesterday and she said something along the lines of... well, you won't have to worry about money since you aren't having kids.  (Not the reason we aren't having kids, just a nice perk...allows us to spend money elsewhere...DVC, airfare, park tickets, restaurants - if only they new how expensive the Disney hobby can become!!!!)



We do still take pictures of Duncan. Probably because he still does goofy stuff. This is one we took a couple a months ago in the snow. Silly dog needs a frisbee in his mouth to pee. He doesn't look too bad for being a couple months shy of 10. He had just gotten done rolling around in the snow.


----------



## Liisa

Duncan looks fantastic!  I never would have guess he was 10.  And I love the frisbee fetish.  My Yeti was quirky like that.  During the day, we confined the dogs to one room while we worked.  When I got home and let him out, he would gather up ALL of his toys in the room and carry them out with him...like he was rescuing them too.  Such personality!

See... he's goof ball too!     (picture taken when he was still a skinny adolescent...see the stick-like legs!)


----------



## TKDisneylover

Liisa said:


> Nanny 911 cracks me and DH up!  It was as if it were made for those of us who have decided not to have kids...  They could rename it... "Birth Control"!



*Good idea!  I wonder if they took a poll how many young couple have seen the program and actually changed their minds about having kids?*





> Originally Posted by *plgrn*
> _That's why I like it so much, but DH can't stand to watch. It grates on his nerves too bad and makes him want to throw something at the TV since he can't jump into the TV and teach those kids a lesson_.


*DH also cannot stand to watch this program.  It just amazes me how many people let their children run their household!*


And thanks everyone for posting the great pics of your pets!


----------



## Liisa

Well, if Nanny 911 doesn't completely change someone's mind.  I'll bet it influences  many of those people who are on the fence about kids.  If I wasn't certain, 15 minutes of that show would have me convinced!


----------



## maddhatir

I find myself "playing" Nanny 911 when I go to SILs house- 

She has 2 kids- 5 and 2 and I will say- "Now- WHY are you asking them to do something- you should be saying (this or that)"  I tell her YOU are in charge not them! 

She probably want's to tell me to mind my own da&% business- but OMG- you can see WHY kids walk all over their parents just watching and saying some of the things she does.

She does say that is it so much easier just giving in......that seems to be the problem for 99% of the parents out there.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> *Good idea!  I wonder if they took a poll how many young couple have seen the program and actually changed their minds about having kids?*



Hey- I think I will do a poll over on the CB asking that very question-- boy I am going to have to put my anti-flame suit on for this one- but I am curious.

I will give you al the linky when I post it. 

Wish me luck... I am going in! 

If I don't make it- I would like to say goodbye right now- and it was nice knowing you all!


----------



## maddhatir

Here is the linky in case anyway wants to view the results


----------



## Liisa

You know what reeaaallly drives me nuts?  Parents who allow their children to make their own decisions regardless of what is going on around them.  Now, I know I'm not a patient person anyway - places to be, things to do... you know - but when I'm in line at a counterservice place (Disney or otherwise) and Dad is asking junior "what would you like for lunch?  They have hamburgers, hotdogs, blah, blah, blah"  And there is an entire line of hungry people waiting for junior to decide what he feels like eating... it's just too much.  When I was a kid, mom took me and my brother to hold a table and Dad went to get the food.  WHATEVER he came back with, that's what we eat.  When did society decide that it was beneficial to allow kids to make their own decisions about everything?  It's not at all beneficial to ME!!!  (and the other 30 hungry souls waiting in line!)   

It also drives me nuts when people wait in line for 20 minutes and then decide AT THE CASH REGISTER what they want to eat.  Plan ahead!!!!  (I did admit that I'm not a patient person, right?!!)


----------



## TKDisneylover

> =maddhatir;17962750]Hey- I think I will do a poll over on the CB asking that very question-- boy I am going to have to put my anti-flame suit on for this one- but I am curious.  Wish me luck... I am going in!




*GOOD LUCK!!*  I'll be sure to check out the link!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Here is the linky in case anyway wants to view the results



I just posted so it is back on the first page.


----------



## mhf

maddhatir said:


> I find myself "playing" Nanny 911 when I go to SILs house-
> 
> She has 2 kids- 5 and 2 and I will say- "Now- WHY are you asking them to do something- you should be saying (this or that)"  I tell her YOU are in charge not them!
> 
> She probably want's to tell me to mind my own da&% business- but OMG- you can see WHY kids walk all over their parents just watching and saying some of the things she does.
> 
> She does say that is it so much easier just giving in......that seems to be the problem for 99% of the parents out there.



So this isn't just me, huh, who wants to step in?  My SIL has 2 boys, 10 and 7, who spent Christmas Eve karate kicking each other and their grandfather's house, picking on the sick cat, and generally wrecking havoc.  And let's add the 10 p.m. cake and soda break to make them even wilder. (and I only spent one evening with them, I wonder what happens the rest of the time ???)  My mother would have never allowed my brother and me to act that way.  And Santa would have been very upset, too!  

For Spring break, SIL wanted to bring them to our house.  I'm afraid I convienently ignored that email. (no flames, please, I know, I know, I know it was wrong.  DH is less of a fan of his nephews than I am and would have had a fit himself if the Christmas events happened here.)


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Wish me luck... I am going in!



 OMG! Do you need reinforcements? I'm heading over now to check.


----------



## plgrn

I was at the mall today and saw a kid about 10 years old zipping around on wheelies fall flat on his back! I  and  and  and  

Thought of you guys.


----------



## TKDisneylover

mhf said:


> For Spring break, SIL wanted to bring them to our house.  I'm afraid I convienently ignored that email. (no flames, please, I know, I know, I know it was wrong.  DH is less of a fan of his nephews than I am and would have had a fit himself if the Christmas events happened here.)



No flames coming from this thread.  Hope you have a wonderful Easter!  WELCOME!


----------



## Chris Rex

Greetings, everyone...

I have to say, this thread has fascinated me for the better part of the weekend. The title itself attracted me here, as my wife and I are one of those 'choosing not to have kids' couples. We also enjoy our trips to disney, although not getting so much into the 'pixie dust' aspect of it. (Nothing wrong with that aspect either; To each their own).

The thing that has kept me captivated and smiling is the evolution of the thread:

If you look at page One, its mainly: 'Why don't people respect our decision to not have kids?' 'Why do people insist on not accepting our answer to the 'why aren't you having kids question' " etc etc.

Early on, people were also trying to be more PC... along the lines of 'Well, there's nothing wrong with kids, it's just not for us' and 'Oh, i LIKE kids, it's just that xxxxx'.

Now I skip ahead to the more 'modern' posts.

"Don't you hate it when kids do THIS" "Boy, aren't we the smart ones because today I saw this idiot kid who xxxxxx" "Why don't parents seem to care how their kids behave in public"

So, while flipping through the threads, oldest to newest, I have watched delicate handling replaced by tongue-in-cheek reality, and Political Correctness replaced by sarcarstic, humorous, and honest outlooks of our shared situation.

And I LOVE it.

Just wanted to say 'hi' and share my appreciation for everyone's contributions.  

With Awe,
Chris Rex


----------



## Liisa

Chris,

Welcome!  I agree - I love that we can say it the way we see it on this thread.  I think most of us like kids - at least the good ones.  I've got a sweetie of a niece who (so far) is being raised right and has a wonderful personality.  It just seems like many of the kids I run into these days are "issues" (politically correct phrase in place of much harsher "pain in the "bleep").

Liisa


----------



## elainemeyerovitz

Liisa said:


> You know what reeaaallly drives me nuts?  Parents who allow their children to make their own decisions regardless of what is going on around them.  Now, I know I'm not a patient person anyway - places to be, things to do... you know - but when I'm in line at a counterservice place (Disney or otherwise) and Dad is asking junior "what would you like for lunch?  They have hamburgers, hotdogs, blah, blah, blah"  And there is an entire line of hungry people waiting for junior to decide what he feels like eating... it's just too much.  When I was a kid, mom took me and my brother to hold a table and Dad went to get the food.  WHATEVER he came back with, that's what we eat.  When did society decide that it was beneficial to allow kids to make their own decisions about everything?  It's not at all beneficial to ME!!!  (and the other 30 hungry souls waiting in line!)
> 
> It also drives me nuts when people wait in line for 20 minutes and then decide AT THE CASH REGISTER what they want to eat.  Plan ahead!!!!  (I did admit that I'm not a patient person, right?!!)



This is a funny one- recently I had 2 experiences in restaurant washrooms where the mother was allowing the 2 yr old to wash their own hands, and there was only one sink, so I had to wait more than 5 minutes missing my meal while the 2 yr old played and took her damn sweet time washing her hands while I stood there waiting to wash my hands- so ignorant of that mother!!


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Here is another reason why DH and I are thinking of not having children. I was stabbed by one of my students with a pencil. The little "darling" was having one of his daily tantrums because he couldn't get what he wanted and decided to not only kick me but to take a pencil and stab me in the hand. No blood thank goodness but how do you think his wonderful parents reacted? They were angry at me!!   I was absolutely floored! This child is spoiled beyond belief. He runs that house but that doesn't fly in my classroom. Sorry bud, but the world does not revolve around you. What was his tantrum today about? He wanted another child's birthday cupcake in addition to the one he was currently eating. Thank goodness I have a supportive admin who shot the parents down. The end result? The little "darling" was suspended for the next week. We will have a week of peace now.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Liisa said:


> You know what reeaaallly drives me nuts?  Parents who allow their children to make their own decisions regardless of what is going on around them.  Now, I know I'm not a patient person anyway - places to be, things to do... you know - but when I'm in line at a counterservice place (Disney or otherwise) and Dad is asking junior "what would you like for lunch?  They have hamburgers, hotdogs, blah, blah, blah"  And there is an entire line of hungry people waiting for junior to decide what he feels like eating... it's just too much.  When I was a kid, mom took me and my brother to hold a table and Dad went to get the food.  WHATEVER he came back with, that's what we eat.  When did society decide that it was beneficial to allow kids to make their own decisions about everything?  It's not at all beneficial to ME!!!  (and the other 30 hungry souls waiting in line!)
> 
> It also drives me nuts when people wait in line for 20 minutes and then decide AT THE CASH REGISTER what they want to eat.  Plan ahead!!!!  (I did admit that I'm not a patient person, right?!!)




LOL Liisa, your post reminded me of our last trip to WDW. DH & I were dying for a Wetzel dog when we were DTD. This idiot breeder with like 3 or 4 *young* kids was standing in line in front of us. Slowly, we see all the little (can I reiterate little?) rats each with a Wetzel dog leaving 1. Every single little turd took like 2 bites and threw it on the ground while DH & I are having to split one. That chapped my *** so badly I wanted to scream!!  I mean they were young enough to where splitting one between 2 rats would've been MORE than enough food. It still chaps my *** when I think about it.

BTW, you've got a beautiful dog. Is he a newf? Dh is wanting to add a newf to our family while I'm wanting to add another saint LOL.


----------



## LoveStitch626

elainemeyerovitz said:


> This is a funny one- recently I had 2 experiences in restaurant washrooms where the mother was allowing the 2 yr old to wash their own hands, and there was only one sink, so I had to wait more than 5 minutes missing my meal while the 2 yr old played and took her damn sweet time washing her hands while I stood there waiting to wash my hands- so ignorant of that mother!!



You actually wait?  I just get my soap zip on up saying "excuse me" as Mary Poppins like as I can while daring Mommydearest to say anything. I'm out of there before she's even got the chance to open her mouth.


----------



## Hixski

Chris Rex said:


> Greetings, everyone...
> 
> I have to say, this thread has fascinated me for the better part of the weekend. The title itself attracted me here, as my wife and I are one of those 'choosing not to have kids' couples. We also enjoy our trips to disney, although not getting so much into the 'pixie dust' aspect of it. (Nothing wrong with that aspect either; To each their own).
> 
> The thing that has kept me captivated and smiling is the evolution of the thread:
> 
> If you look at page One, its mainly: 'Why don't people respect our decision to not have kids?' 'Why do people insist on not accepting our answer to the 'why aren't you having kids question' " etc etc.
> 
> Early on, people were also trying to be more PC... along the lines of 'Well, there's nothing wrong with kids, it's just not for us' and 'Oh, i LIKE kids, it's just that xxxxx'.
> 
> Now I skip ahead to the more 'modern' posts.
> 
> "Don't you hate it when kids do THIS" "Boy, aren't we the smart ones because today I saw this idiot kid who xxxxxx" "Why don't parents seem to care how their kids behave in public"
> 
> So, while flipping through the threads, oldest to newest, I have watched delicate handling replaced by tongue-in-cheek reality, and Political Correctness replaced by sarcarstic, humorous, and honest outlooks of our shared situation.
> 
> And I LOVE it.
> 
> Just wanted to say 'hi' and share my appreciation for everyone's contributions.
> 
> With Awe,
> Chris Rex



Welcome Chris!
Yes, we have gotten more sarcastic as we have gone on. If you read them all then you know we got the trolls now and then trying to convince us of the error of our ways. After that we gave up on being PC. Gloves were off and now it is just the childfree. Some parents come on to say they admire our choice and think it is our choice. There is one troll who comes back now and again but we just ignore her. So have fun and hang with us on the dark side.


----------



## elainemeyerovitz

LoveStitch626 said:


> You actually wait?  I just get my soap zip on up saying "excuse me" as Mary Poppins like as I can while daring Mommydearest to say anything. I'm out of there before she's even got the chance to open her mouth.



Guess I haven't reached that level of rudeness yet- I try not to lower myself to others' level


----------



## aclov

Liisa said:


> You know what reeaaallly drives me nuts?  Parents who allow their children to make their own decisions regardless of what is going on around them.  Now, I know I'm not a patient person anyway - places to be, things to do... you know - but when I'm in line at a counterservice place (Disney or otherwise) and Dad is asking junior "what would you like for lunch?  They have hamburgers, hotdogs, blah, blah, blah"  And there is an entire line of hungry people waiting for junior to decide what he feels like eating... it's just too much.  When I was a kid, mom took me and my brother to hold a table and Dad went to get the food.  WHATEVER he came back with, that's what we eat.  When did society decide that it was beneficial to allow kids to make their own decisions about everything?  It's not at all beneficial to ME!!!  (and the other 30 hungry souls waiting in line!)
> 
> It also drives me nuts when people wait in line for 20 minutes and then decide AT THE CASH REGISTER what they want to eat.  Plan ahead!!!!  (I did admit that I'm not a patient person, right?!!)



This is what annoys me when going out to eat with my friend and her three children, than if she's taking care of her nephew it's four kids.   She goes around the table and asks each of them what they want including the almost two year old   The poor server is standing there waiting patiently while the kid isn't paying any attention to what my friend is saying or not answering -  than she has to ask them all over again.   Ugh! -I feel like just ordering for them.    I mean half the time they don't eat all of their food anyway!


----------



## Chris Rex

Hixski said:


> Welcome Chris!
> Yes, we have gotten more sarcastic as we have gone on. If you read them all then you know we got the trolls now and then trying to convince us of the error of our ways. After that we gave up on being PC. Gloves were off and now it is just the childfree.



Great to know. I havent quite read ALL the posts yet, but I'm so riveted that it's inevitable. Thanks for the warm 'welcomes'  

Adding to the propoganda, I wanted to put forth my favorite observation: The more that people have trouble with their own kids, they more they seem to bug me about when I'm having some of my own.

Typical phone conversation I seem to be having lately:

ME: Hey Phyllis, how ya ya been?

PHYLLIS: (Sounds of crashing plates in the background) Oh, everything is going well. I'm.. JOEY, STOP HITTING YOUR BROTHER. (Deep breath) Jesus. Anyway, things are the same, my boss gave me a hard time this week. Remember how I told you that (More crashing plates) ... one sec ... KYLE! DID I OR DID I NOT JUST TELL YOU TO STOP PLAYING WITH THE DISHES!.

ME: You know, I can call you back if...

PHYLLIS: No no... why? How's your wife? Is she still... hang on... FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I WILL DESTROY EACH OF YOU WITH MY BARE HANDS IF YOU DO NOT SHUT UP RIGHT THIS SECOND. (Sound of crashes plates ceases.)

ME: ...

PHYLLIS: Sorry about that. So, things are well with the wife? "When are you having kids?"




With awe, 
Chris Rex


----------



## TKDisneylover

Mrs.Reese said:


> Here is another reason why DH and I are thinking of not having children. I was stabbed by one of my students with a pencil. The little "darling" was having one of his daily tantrums because he couldn't get what he wanted and decided to not only kick me but to take a pencil and stab me in the hand. No blood thank goodness but how do you think his wonderful parents reacted? They were angry at me!!   I was absolutely floored! This child is spoiled beyond belief. He runs that house but that doesn't fly in my classroom. Sorry bud, but the world does not revolve around you. What was his tantrum today about? He wanted another child's birthday cupcake in addition to the one he was currently eating. Thank goodness I have a supportive admin who shot the parents down. The end result? The little "darling" was suspended for the next week. We will have a week of peace now.



My DH works at a school and there is a "little darling" who attends that actually has a staff person to follow her around everywhere she goes.  She will just get up in the middle of class and walk out wandering the halls, yelling and throwing fits about nothing.  The parents are Sheriff's deputy's(she's an only child) who talk to her like a 2-year old (she's in the 5th grade).  They have been allowing this child to do this for 2 years now!  What happens when she gets into middle school?!  The other day she kicked her shoe off and it flew in the air and onto the roof of the school.  First she wanted someone to get it down for her, but then thougt a second and said, "nevermind, if it stays up there my parents will buy me a new pair!"  Good thing they stopped at one kid!

Thank goodness you were not injured severly!


----------



## LoveStitch626

elainemeyerovitz said:


> Guess I haven't reached that level of rudeness yet- I try not to lower myself to others' level



Sorry, but it's not rudeness. People where I live are beyond rude. Some parents will say "Let this lady wash her hands" and I give them a grateful thank you. The parents I was refering to are the ones who give me a "aren't they precious" grin like I'm supposed to be amused at their rats playing in the sink. Where I live it's fend for yourself or get run over.


----------



## Liisa

LoveStitch626 said:


> BTW, you've got a beautiful dog. Is he a newf? Dh is wanting to add a newf to our family while I'm wanting to add another saint LOL.



LoveStitch626,

Nope, not a newf (though I know he looked like one).  My Yeti was a Tibetan Mastiff.  We lost him this past January at the way too young age of 6.  I posted his story a few pages back (page 70 I think) - if you were at all interested.  We miss him terribly.  He was a wonderful guy.

Thanks...he was beautiful! We are Tibetan Mastiff people (although I love almost any big furry dogs.  If you have pics of your Saint Bernard, I'd love to see them!!!  The one BIG benefit to Tibetans - no drool and they only shed once per year... nice perk on a big, furry guy!)

Liisa


----------



## Liisa

LoveStitch626 said:


> Sorry, but it's not rudeness. People where I live are beyond rude. Some parents will say "Let this lady wash her hands" and I give them a grateful thank you. The parents I was refering to are the ones who give me a "aren't they precious" grin like I'm supposed to be amused at their rats playing in the sink. Where I live it's fend for yourself or get run over.



I have to agree.  I would have waited patiently for a few minutes, but when the kid started playing in the sink and the parent didn't keep things moving, I would have leaned over and taken care of myself as well.  If a parent is trying, I have no problem giving them the benefit of the doubt.  It's when they expect the world around them to cater to their kid, that's when I can't help myself...  I think a pointed look at dear old mom and an "excuse me sweetie, my dinner is getting cold" would work wonders in that situation.


----------



## luvthemouse71

I don't know what came over me but I just posted in that "nanny 911" thread on the CB, and said some very blunt things. Namely, that some kids are just born nasty, cranky etc. I also brought up the fact that even notorious psychopaths were once someone's precious little tot. I think I just did the Dis Board equivalent of poking a hornets nest with a large stick...Maybe I'm PMSing.


----------



## maddhatir

Chris Rex said:


> Great to know. I havent quite read ALL the posts yet, but I'm so riveted that it's inevitable. Thanks for the warm 'welcomes'
> 
> Adding to the propoganda, I wanted to put forth my favorite observation: The more that people have trouble with their own kids, they more they seem to bug me about when I'm having some of my own.
> 
> Typical phone conversation I seem to be having lately:
> 
> ME: Hey Phyllis, how ya ya been?
> 
> PHYLLIS: (Sounds of crashing plates in the background) Oh, everything is going well. I'm.. JOEY, STOP HITTING YOUR BROTHER. (Deep breath) Jesus. Anyway, things are the same, my boss gave me a hard time this week. Remember how I told you that (More crashing plates) ... one sec ... KYLE! DID I OR DID I NOT JUST TELL YOU TO STOP PLAYING WITH THE DISHES!.
> 
> ME: You know, I can call you back if...
> 
> PHYLLIS: No no... why? How's your wife? Is she still... hang on... FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I WILL DESTROY EACH OF YOU WITH MY BARE HANDS IF YOU DO NOT SHUT UP RIGHT THIS SECOND. (Sound of crashes plates ceases.)
> 
> ME: ...
> 
> PHYLLIS: Sorry about that. So, things are well with the wife? "When are you having kids?"
> 
> 
> 
> 
> With awe,
> Chris Rex



Welcome "Oh childless one"


----------



## Liisa

luvthemouse71 said:


> I don't know what came over me but I just posted in that "nanny 911" thread on the CB, and said some very blunt things. Namely, that some kids are just born nasty, cranky etc. I also brought up the fact that even notorious psychopaths were once someone's precious little tot. I think I just did the Dis Board equivalent of poking a hornets nest with a large stick...Maybe I'm PMSing.





   Now I'm heading over to take a peak.    This should get very interesting, very quickly.  In my experience, many people with kids are PRO KIDS (bold and underlined).  I agree, I think some people out there are just mean from the get go and not much mom or dad can do to change that.  (where the heck is that stirring up the pot smiley when I need it?!!)


----------



## av01bps

Bravo to everyone who chooses not to have kids. As a happy and married mom of 2 DD (and a High school teacher), I know people who see kids as their accessories and do not "enjoy' the work of parenting. Bravo to all of you who make this perfectly normal and appropriate choice!

How about "Kids would hamper our wild nightlife!" as an explanation to those who feel the need to ask why!?


----------



## maddhatir

av01bps said:


> Bravo to everyone who chooses not to have kids. As a happy and married mom of 2 DD (and a High school teacher), I know people who see kids as their accessories and do not "enjoy' the work of parenting. Bravo to all of you who make this perfectly normal and appropriate choice!
> 
> How about "Kids would hamper our wild nightlife!" as an explanation to those who feel the need to ask why!?



Yes- what would the kiddies say while watching mommy and daddy swinging from the chandelier! 

I couldn't give that kind of thing up for a kid!


----------



## aclov

Liisa said:


> LoveStitch626,
> 
> Nope, not a newf (though I know he looked like one).  My Yeti was a Tibetan Mastiff.  We lost him this past January at the way too young age of 6.  I posted his story a few pages back (page 70 I think) - if you were at all interested.  We miss him terribly.  He was a wonderful guy.
> 
> Thanks...he was beautiful! We are Tibetan Mastiff people (although I love almost any big furry dogs.  If you have pics of your Saint Bernard, I'd love to see them!!!  The one BIG benefit to Tibetans - no drool and they only shed once per year... nice perk on a big, furry guy!)
> 
> Liisa



Liisa -  just want to say I'm sorry for your loss.   My furbaby is almost 6 and it would kill me if anything happened to him.    He was a beautiful dog and it sounds like you provided a wonderful life to him and he was very much loved.


----------



## druidia

*For those of you who are able to help, please see this link over on the CB.*

My furbabies didn't come from the Humane Society, but one of them did come from the pound and the second one was on his way to the HS before we took him from a friend.
*
Please help if you can!

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1415496*


----------



## Liisa

aclov,

Thank you... I still have my moments and my mini-breakdowns.  I was devastated (as you can imagine with a 6 year old furbaby of your own).  The hardest part was not having time to prepare.  One weekend he was pretty much fine (his normal health issues aside), then the following weekend, he was so sick they had oxygen tubes in his nose and he was on a feeding tube.  Life just doesn't make any sense sometimes.  

Enjoy your little one!!!!  
Liisa


----------



## Liisa

Where did everybody go?  I'm certain all of us northerners have gone into hibernation!!!  Brrrrr....  if ever I needed a WDW trip!  

April showers.... bah humbug!


----------



## Chris Rex

Liisa said:


> Where did everybody go?  I'm certain all of us northerners have gone into hibernation!!!  Brrrrr....  if ever I needed a WDW trip!
> 
> April showers.... bah humbug!



Good afternoon  After the 'hell rain' yesterday, we are SOoooooo going to jump in on the free Dining Plan stuff. Need a break from the Northeast, even if it IS half a year away!


----------



## Liisa

We are heading down from Sept 18th - 22nd.  No free dining for us though (although I wouldn't trade my DVC for free dining anyway).   I wish I could break away for a trip in the next month...but no such luck.  I've got a brother in Tampa who is getting married in June so that will be my next vacation.  They definitely will be having children which will be nice for my mother... she will make a wonderful grandmother to kids that don't have four paws and furry ears!


----------



## maddhatir

I can't believe as bad as it was raining yesterday- it was pretty warm- I was sitting on my porch DISing on my laptop-- and this morning I woke up @ 5:30am and just stared outside thinking---- "what the?"  "is THAT snow?"


----------



## maddhatir

I do have a little story to tell- This weekend I attended a wedding shower- I noticed that my cousin's daughter was not there (she is maybe 20- 21?) and we got to talking about her daughter and her DBF just got back from their first Disney trip together and LOVED IT!

We were discussing her daughter a little more and my cousin told me that her daughter is using DH and I as "role models" in their relationship and DO NOT want kids-  I said- wow- I am very flattered!


----------



## Chris Rex

maddhatir said:


> We were discussing her daughter a little more and my cousin told me that her daughter is using DH and I as "role models" in their relationship and DO NOT want kids-  I said- wow- I am very flattered!



Do you know how many people that will probably upset? Tell them to keep it quiet... you know that the rest of the family will not be so understanding.

 That being said, that is AWESOME!


----------



## Chris Rex

Liisa said:


> We are heading down from Sept 18th - 22nd.  No free dining for us though (although I wouldn't trade my DVC for free dining anyway).



We're either heading down the week of the 9th or the 16th. This free dining thing has us hooked. 
After eating in all the best restaurants last year, we returned home only to find our palates hopelessly refined.

Never thought it would happen to me.

It took, no sh-t, about 2 weeks before I could taste my 'normal everyday' food again.

Needless to say, we're hooked now. It's the only vacation where we're not trying to watch what eat. Instead, it's all about 'Ok, We're eating here on Monday, there on Tuesday...' etc etc


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> I do have a little story to tell- This weekend I attended a wedding shower- I noticed that my cousin's daughter was not there (she is maybe 20- 21?) and we got to talking about her daughter and her DBF just got back from their first Disney trip together and LOVED IT!
> 
> We were discussing her daughter a little more and my cousin told me that her daughter is using DH and I as "role models" in their relationship and DO NOT want kids-  I said- wow- I am very flattered!



That's funny!! I thought the CF were usually they evil, child hating monsters of the world. Who knew we could be role models??


----------



## maddhatir

Chris Rex said:


> Do you know how many people that will probably upset? Tell them to keep it quiet... you know that the rest of the family will not be so understanding.
> 
> That being said, that is AWESOME!



Na! Our family is pretty cool with that kind of thing. There are a few of us that are CF and even unmarried- 

We are not the judgemental type! 

If anyone did get upset- they would say now lets review "The People vs Maddhatir and her DH" and they would drop it


----------



## dolcezena

Hi All!

Thought I'd pop in & catch up on the stuff going on around here. I feel like I haven't had a chance to breathe in a couple of weeks! What with fiscal year end, Easter long weekend, etc, I've barely had time to chill!

So, on with my ramblings...



Liisa said:


> ... I still have my moments and my mini-breakdowns.  Liisa



I hear ya Liisa - one of my cats died almost 2 years ago now & still break down once in a while. Don't even like to contemplate thinking about anything happening to the other cat, or either of our dogs.

Tee hee, maybe I should start referring to them as DC7, DDo3 & DDo13 on the community boards in threads about child raising. Dog training tactics seem like a good method for parenting. 

Seriously, we put Riley in a "time out" when he does something bad. Although having a rational discussion about the inappropriateness of his behaviour seems to be as effective as some people's parenting tactics......


Actually, what brought me to the boards today was that horror in VA. Figured there's be a thread about it...Then I realized I needed some fun after reading it, so I came back here. 

Had to yell at a group of bratty tweens in front of my house today - there's a high school AND a middle school 3 blocks away - all sucking down junk food & Slurpees & tossing THEIR garbage onto OUR lawn. Little snots. Made them pick up ALL the garbage on our front lawn & throw it in the trash can across the street.  Just call me the Wicked Witch! 

Seriously, I don't know how educators today deal with their jobs - between the day-to-day frustrations, escalating potential for physical attacks & the low pay, well....they deserve a hell of a lot more!


----------



## LoveStitch626

Chris Rex said:


> We're either heading down the week of the 9th or the 16th. This free dining thing has us hooked.
> After eating in all the best restaurants last year, we returned home only to find our palates hopelessly refined.
> 
> Never thought it would happen to me.
> 
> It took, no sh-t, about 2 weeks before I could taste my 'normal everyday' food again.
> 
> Needless to say, we're hooked now. It's the only vacation where we're not trying to watch what eat. Instead, it's all about 'Ok, We're eating here on Monday, there on Tuesday...' etc etc



LMAO Chris you're not alone! I was just talking to my brother about this Friday night. DH & I literally go off food for about 3 weeks after we return from WDW! Nothing sounds good! We'll munch on something just to eat that day, but we sure as heck don't ENJOY it. 


As for what I've been up to, I finally finished my travel agent classes AND got picked up by a Disney agency!


----------



## LoveStitch626

dolcezena said:


> Tee hee, maybe I should start referring to them as DC7, DDo3 & DDo13 on the community boards in threads about child raising. Dog training tactics seem like a good method for parenting.
> 
> Seriously, we put Riley in a "time out" when he does something bad. Although having a rational discussion about the inappropriateness of his behaviour seems to be as effective as some people's parenting tactics......



LOL I like the idea of referring to furbabies as DC & DDo! Stupid question, but is Riley a kid or furbaby? LMAO We do the same thing with our dog. We did time outs when he was a puppy but he doesn't need them anymore. We do have long talks with him about his behavior. If he was acting like a horse's hip I sit down in front of him and make sure I've got his attention then I tell him why what he did wasn't appropriate. LOL I do the same thing with "behavior expectations" in advance too.. like if we have people coming over or whatever. I'm a firm believer in "the furbabies live here, you don't" but I do have a talk with him ahead of time so he doesn't act the complete fool.


----------



## Liisa

Chris,

I'm on board with you... I spent 50% of my time planning parks and attraction strategies and 50% planning my dinners / lunches and reviewing menus.  YUM!!!!

Liisa


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> As for what I've been up to, I finally finished my travel agent classes AND got picked up by a Disney agency!



Congratulations!!!


----------



## dolcezena

LoveStitch626 said:


> LOL I like the idea of referring to furbabies as DC & DDo! Stupid question, but is Riley a kid or furbaby?



Riley's our 3 y/o Border Collie - basically a regular dog on crack.  

He now puts HIMSELF into his time out spot (corner of the loveseat, where we never sit) when he's done something he knows is bad. A while ago he got into the bathroom garbage at night & when I came downstairs in the morning, there was kleenex & cotton balls all over the house - he took one look at me & jumped onto the loveseat. Wouldn't get down until DFi came downstairs & "released" him. Can you tell who the disciplinarian is in our house?


----------



## dolcezena

LoveStitch626 said:


> As for what I've been up to, I finally finished my travel agent classes AND got picked up by a Disney agency!



Hey I missed that! CONGRATS!!!! Interested in taking on a Canadian client for Sept '08?  (Kidding mods - no unacceptable solicitations for travel agents going on here  )


----------



## plgrn

Hi guys! I've been MIA from the Dis for a while. My 3 week old niece passed away, so DH and I were out of town for the funeral and to offer support to our family. Yet another reason to be childfree!! I couldn't handle my infant dying in my arms...and the only surefire way to prevent that is to not get pregnant!!

Anyway, the family is doing remarkably well given the horrible circumstances and DH and I were able to spoil our nieces and nephews absolutely rotten. They miss us so much and have declared us the best aunt and uncle in the world.  Ahhh....yes. Enjoying the unconditional love of a child without any responsibility involved.  

*Madd*, I got my first ride on a Harley while we were gone! BIL took me for a ride. I've been on a "crotch rocket" before, but never a cruiser. This was amazing. Help me talk DH into getting one!!! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	





*LoveStitch*, Congratulations!! You've worked so hard and I'm happy to see it pay off for you.


----------



## dolcezena

Hey All

I'm sure most of you have seen this before, but my aunt (she of the Forward-happy trigger finger) just sent me this. It brought a smile to my face, so I thought I'd share it...

Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3 Are easier to train
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends 
7. Don't smoke or drink (Although Mags does enjoy the occasional bowl of beer - a small one...)
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions 
9. Don't want to wear your clothes 
10. Don't need gazillion dollars for college, and...
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children. (I absolutely howled when I got to that one!)


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Hi guys! I've been MIA from the Dis for a while. My 3 week old niece passed away, so DH and I were out of town for the funeral and to offer support to our family. Yet another reason to be childfree!! I couldn't handle my infant dying in my arms...and the only surefire way to prevent that is to not get pregnant!!
> 
> Anyway, the family is doing remarkably well given the horrible circumstances and DH and I were able to spoil our nieces and nephews absolutely rotten. They miss us so much and have declared us the best aunt and uncle in the world.  Ahhh....yes. Enjoying the unconditional love of a child without any responsibility involved.
> 
> *Madd*, I got my first ride on a Harley while we were gone! BIL took me for a ride. I've been on a "crotch rocket" before, but never a cruiser. This was amazing. Help me talk DH into getting one!!!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> *LoveStitch*, Congratulations!! You've worked so hard and I'm happy to see it pay off for you.



OMG Jenn- I am so sorry for your loss! That is horrible. I don't mean to pry- but was it SIDS???

And it is good that you had a chance to get out and ride, beautiful bike. It is a great way to clear your head and forget things for a while- I call it therapy!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Help me talk DH into getting one!!!



Does your DH want a bike?? DH and I have wanted a bike about a few years after we started dating- so it was just something we knew we wanted.


----------



## maddhatir

dolcezena said:


> Hey All
> 11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children. (I absolutely howled when I got to that one!)


----------



## dolcezena

plgrn said:


> Hi guys! I've been MIA from the Dis for a while. My 3 week old niece passed away, so DH and I were out of town for the funeral and to offer support to our family.



Oh plgrn, I'm sorry - don't know how I missed this!  Hope you & the rest of your family are doing OK. 

And now I just have to acknowledge this (please ignore if I sound unforgiveably intrusive)...Judging by the pic in your sig, then the pic of you on the Harley, you've lost some weight...lookin' good! 

Buying a Harley is on my life list - now I just learn how to drive!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Does your DH want a bike?? DH and I have wanted a bike about a few years after we started dating- so it was just something we knew we wanted.



He refuses to ever ride a bike because he knows he'd run out and buy one! And the problem is....  He has it in his head that they are too unsafe.

SIL's baby died as a result of a heart defect that they didn't even know about until she was born. She was a fighter and lasted 3 weeks though. Very sad.  

Thanks for your thoughts and prayers. 

Oh and dolcezena, thank you for thinking that I've lost weight!!! Unfortunately, it only appears that way b/c in my siggy pic mom and I are literally wearing everything in our suitcase because it was soooo cold!


----------



## Liisa

dolcezena said:


> Hey All
> 
> I'm sure most of you have seen this before, but my aunt (she of the Forward-happy trigger finger) just sent me this. It brought a smile to my face, so I thought I'd share it...
> 
> Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
> 4. Normally come when called





Ok... could someone please forward #4 to my two furry beasts!!!  My 4 yo girl will actually sit down facing the other way in complete defiance to my summons.  I know with them it is a breed thing (they are absurdly stubborn by nature)... but ugh!!!


----------



## plgrn

Liisa said:


> Ok... could someone please forward #4 to my two furry beasts!!!  My 4 yo girl will actually sit down facing the other way in complete defiance to my summons.  I know with them it is a breed thing (they are absurdly stubborn by nature)... but ugh!!!



"Normally" is the keyword there, eh?


----------



## Liisa

These shouldn't be combined, but plgrn, I am sooo sorry.  Having lost my dog after a week in ICU, I know the emotional rollercoaster I was on.  I can't even imagine what it would be like with a child.  Especially when you have 9 months of hopes and dreams rolled into that little baby.  Hugs to you and your family.



Lovestitch... congratulations!  I always wondered if being a travel agent is a fun job.  Do you get to "test" the products?  I'm a boring old bean counter  so most other jobs sound exotic and exciting to me!


----------



## Hixski

plgrn said:


> Hi guys! I've been MIA from the Dis for a while. My 3 week old niece passed away, so DH and I were out of town for the funeral and to offer support to our family. Yet another reason to be childfree!! I couldn't handle my infant dying in my arms...and the only surefire way to prevent that is to not get pregnant!!
> 
> Anyway, the family is doing remarkably well given the horrible circumstances and DH and I were able to spoil our nieces and nephews absolutely rotten. They miss us so much and have declared us the best aunt and uncle in the world.  Ahhh....yes. Enjoying the unconditional love of a child without any responsibility involved.
> 
> *Madd*, I got my first ride on a Harley while we were gone! BIL took me for a ride. I've been on a "crotch rocket" before, but never a cruiser. This was amazing. Help me talk DH into getting one!!!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> *LoveStitch*, Congratulations!! You've worked so hard and I'm happy to see it pay off for you.




I am so sorry to hear about your niece. That must have been terrible for the family.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Liisa said:


> Lovestitch... congratulations!  I always wondered if being a travel agent is a fun job.  Do you get to "test" the products?  I'm a boring old bean counter  so most other jobs sound exotic and exciting to me!



Well I'm "job training" right now. It seems to be pretty fun. I've always had jobs where I dealt directly with customers (restaurants, medical, etc) so dealing with people.. even difficult people... is no problem. I can also handle all the fast paced high stress days too because lemme tell ya... nothing can beat Valentine's Day or other big holidays in a chain restaurant! As a bean counter, you'd probably be pretty good at it considering you've got to keep all your records (especially your commission checks) nice & tight & organized. Something I'm NOT good at, but I'm trying to learn. I can mentally organize because of being a server. I know I've got to do this, this & this in this order. If you like working with people..can deal with people who are not so nice sometimes... and you like planning trips, give it a shot. One of my good friends used to work for a ritzy hotel. He says the ability to be a witch is also handy. When agents call the hotels because something has fouled up, he told me the hotel workers start shaking in their shoes.  


Plgrn, I'm so sorry to hear about your niece. That's an awful thing and I hope your family finds a way to get through this.   


Hatir, I'm waiting for the day dh walks in and informs me he's bought a bike. Oh it's only a matter of time. He's not going to be buying a bike flat out though. My brother builds bikes (and is working on one of his own right now.. it's going to be awesome! I should send you some pics! PM me your email address and I'll send you a few that I've got) and dh has been learning from him slowly. DH wants to buy a frame and build it up himself. As long as it has a B-bar big enough for my fat patootie, we'll be fine!! LMAO I want to play with the toy too! Hey btw, what happened to your old Depp pic with the saw blade? That was HOT!


----------



## mhf

TKDisneylover said:


> No flames coming from this thread.  Hope you have a wonderful Easter!  WELCOME!



Thanks Tammy!  We had a lovely Easter (not counting the SNOW).  I made lamb and risotto and DH opened the requisite bottle of white wine.

Let's hope SPRING really shows up next week,
Melissa


----------



## dolcezena

mhf said:


> Thanks Tammy!  We had a lovely Easter (not counting the SNOW).  I made lamb and risotto and DH opened the requisite bottle of white wine.
> 
> Let's hope SPRING really shows up next week,
> Melissa



Not to rub it in, but....ok, yes, I'm rubbing it in - but it was sunny & 18 C today!!!! (That's ummm, lemme check the conversion...64 F)

After 7 months of snow on the ground I just have to.... 

plgrn - COLD? in Florida??? That happens? Plesae don't destroy my fantasies about living somewhere other than "WinterPeg," as my hometown is so affectionately known! Last time I went to Orlando, it was in July (not this past July, many years ago) - I remember thinking then I thought I was going to suffocate! 

Mind you, the definition of "cold" varies with where you're from! Met an Aussie winemaker who was talking about his "cool" climate wines - by which he meant average temps of 81-93 F! Since he was here in October & it was -4, we killed ourselves laughing.

Liisa, I know what you mean - Mags literally glances over her shoulder at me when I'm telling her to come inside & saunters off on her "yard patrol." I swear she's laughing at me!


----------



## plgrn

dolcezena said:


> plgrn - COLD? in Florida??? That happens? Plesae don't destroy my fantasies about living somewhere other than "WinterPeg," as my hometown is so affectionately known! Last time I went to Orlando, it was in July (not this past July, many years ago) - I remember thinking then I thought I was going to suffocate!



It was in the 30's Farenheit and windy. That was cold to me! Must have been to everyone else too since the Magic Kingdom during Pirate Princess Party looked like a ghost town. It was AWESOME!


----------



## dolcezena

mhf said:


> plgrn said:
> 
> 
> 
> It was in the 30's Farenheit and windy. That was cold to me! Must have been to everyone else too since the Magic Kingdom during Pirate Princess Party looked like a ghost town. It was AWESOME!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> OK, that's definitely chilly, I'll give you that. Funny though, when we get that temp in Sept we freak - out come the winter jackets. When it comes in March, out come the shorts! It's all a matter of perspective, isn't it?
> 
> So here I am, enjoying the first days of GORGEOUS weather we've had in months & on Sunday, I fly to Calgary, where they're predicting blizzards! So not fair.
> 
> On the other hand, I'm being PAID to go "taste" 160 wines, so how bad is my life right now? God I love my job!!!!
Click to expand...


----------



## rigs32

For one of the many reasons why I am not having kids, check out the "DH Vent" thread on the community board about watching ONE child and working and running a household.


----------



## Liisa

dolcezena... I want your job!!!!  So, assuming you taste and swallow... how on earth do you manage to stand upright and walk out of there?!!   


Regarding the thread on the CB, I think if more parents would be honest, they would admit that maybe they aren't so thrilled they had kids.  One of my co-workers (also childfree) was talking to his doctor about it, and his doctor admitted that he had many days where he thought how nice "the other life" would be.  I think that admitting maybe life would have been nice without kids doesn't mean that you don't love your offspring... why do parents feel it is so sacreligious to admit it?  I readily admit that life would be easier without two dogs, and I absolutely love them to pieces (except when my Khabo feels the need to bark incessantly in the middle of the night at the imaginery invaders in the house!!!!  Just because he gets to sleep all day and doesn't have to go to work, doesn't mean the rest of us wouldn't enjoy a nice uninterrupted 8 hours....)


----------



## rigs32

Liisa said:


> I think if more parents would be honest, they would admit that maybe they aren't so thrilled they had kids.



I agree.  The woman is being torn apart over there because she admitted that she needed "time off" from being a parent - time for herself.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

That's just terrible! Why is it a crime to take care of yourself?  I have co-workers that are pretty much slaves to their children's lives and I wonder what will happen to them when their children leave home.  Will they even remember what they actually like to do? I find it pretty hard to believe that anyone truly enjoys ballet recitals besides the kids.


----------



## Hixski

Mrs.Reese said:


> That's just terrible! Why is it a crime to take care of yourself?  I have co-workers that are pretty much slaves to their children's lives and I wonder what will happen to them when their children leave home.  Will they even remember what they actually like to do? I find it pretty hard to believe that anyone truly enjoys ballet recitals besides the kids.



We were discussing this awhile back on here. There were alot of posters on the CB talking about their DH cheating or wanting a divorce. Most of them were SAHM. You would read and most sounded like they didn't have a clue what was going on in their lives or their DH's life. It was only the children. Sad really. I have often thought of these types of parents. What happens when the children are gone? They look at each other and think "Who are you"?? At least I know if my DH ever wants a divorce (and he better not ) I know if won't be because I was a slave to my children.


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> Hatir, I'm waiting for the day dh walks in and informs me he's bought a bike. Oh it's only a matter of time. He's not going to be buying a bike flat out though. My brother builds bikes (and is working on one of his own right now.. it's going to be awesome! I should send you some pics! PM me your email address and I'll send you a few that I've got) and dh has been learning from him slowly. DH wants to buy a frame and build it up himself. As long as it has a B-bar big enough for my fat patootie, we'll be fine!! LMAO I want to play with the toy too! Hey btw, what happened to your old Depp pic with the saw blade? That was HOT!



I like to change my Mr Depp pics every so often-- keepin' it fresh- You can copy the pic and put it in your siggy- you can enjoy the view everytime you post!!! 

I hope your DH is a bit faster than mine- he also talks about bldg his own bike- but the way he moves- we may get to ride it when we are like...90!!! He is a mechanic so its not like he doesn't know what he is doing..... 

Tomorrow is going to be BEAUTIFUL, so me, DH my BIL and SIL are going for a nice ride!!! First one of the spring season!- I can't wait! I am sure there will be tons of bikes out there! Probably will end up in New Hope PA- it is about an hour ride- but it is such a NICE ride- 

New Hope is one of my favorite places- we have been going there for about 20 years- way before we had the bike. The history there is incredible- it is along the Delaware River- there are underground tunnels where the pirates would smuggle in- and out! their goods from their ships into the town so no one can see them- there are also tunnels used for the Underground Railroad-- Washington and his troops were camped out in the area during the Revolutionary war- he crossed the Delaware a few miles down the river. And LOTS of ghosts!!!

The buildings and just the the whole feel of the town is so---- comforting to me. 

Maybe your DH will get the "bike bug"now it is getting warmer- what part of the country are you in??

I would love to see the progress of the bike! I will PM you my e-mail address!


----------



## WDWguru

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1431676


----------



## Chris Rex

WDWguru said:


> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1431676



Oh my...

I have to say, I was blissfully ignorant till a few moments ago.

Now I can't 'unlearn' this new knowledge.

Damn your black heart  

With Awe,
Chris Rex


----------



## Hixski

WDWguru said:


> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1431676



That thread is up to 108 posts. That is alot of weak bladders running around WDW. I think I will be checking all seats from now on.


----------



## WDWguru

Oh gosh, Hixski, I didn't even THINK of that! ACK!!


----------



## AutumnKlassic

I have been asking my cousin to let me take her oldest daughter places (shes 3 and a half and I am pushing 30).  I offered to take her to swimming lessons because they just had another daughter and dont have the money, time or will power to do it themselves.  I was told "I dont know" and "Maybe when she gets older" and "its too expensive".  I really want to do this because the cousin was never a good swimmer and I dont want her daughter to have all the fears she had growing up.  I was the only "only child" in all of my extended family and had opportunities to do alot of things the others never did (skiing, boating, horse shows, vacations, etc) and since I dont have a kid I really wanted to help my cousins daughter to have these opportunties.  *They keep telling me to have my own kid like its a toy they dont want to share. * I really dont know if thats what I want because like everyone says, they like their own me time, so do I.  I just want to be able to play with the kid and its driving me crazy they are keeping her away from me.  Also all along they complain that my other cousin (her sister) and everyone else in their family never had time for the little girl.  My uncle and aunt wont put the dogs up when they visit knowing that the kids are afraid of them.  Just wanted to rant


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> That thread is up to 108 posts. That is alot of weak bladders running around WDW. I think I will be checking all seats from now on.




I can see them all becoming a "clique"


----------



## maddhatir

AutumnKlassic said:


> I have been asking my cousin to let me take her oldest daughter places (shes 3 and a half and I am pushing 30).  I offered to take her to swimming lessons because they just had another daughter and dont have the money, time or will power to do it themselves.  I was told "I dont know" and "Maybe when she gets older" and "its too expensive".  I really want to do this because the cousin was never a good swimmer and I dont want her daughter to have all the fears she had growing up.  I was the only "only child" in all of my extended family and had opportunities to do alot of things the others never did (skiing, boating, horse shows, vacations, etc) and since I dont have a kid I really wanted to help my cousins daughter to have these opportunties.  *They keep telling me to have my own kid like its a toy they dont want to share. * I really dont know if thats what I want because like everyone says, they like their own me time, so do I.  I just want to be able to play with the kid and its driving me crazy they are keeping her away from me.  Also all along they complain that my other cousin (her sister) and everyone else in their family never had time for the little girl.  My uncle and aunt wont put the dogs up when they visit knowing that the kids are afraid of them.  Just wanted to rant



Sounds like if one their "mommy friends" wanted to take the child they would have no problem with that.


----------



## Liisa

Mothers can be odd...  DH and I are taking our nephew and our step-niece to WDW this December.  We all got together to talk about the vacation a week ago.  Let me preface this by saying that our step-niece is a well behaved, responsible 13 year old.  Fully capable of deciding what she would like to do when we are in the parks.  As we are talking about the rides and our niece is getting excited, her mom steps in and says, "I'm fine with everything but not the rollercoasters.  I don't want you to go on those, they make me nervous."  Ok... first, this is DISNEY!!!!  With the exception of maybe RnR, none of the coasters are that bad.  And second.... she's 13!!!!  Regardless, her mom won't be with us and what she won't know....   

Talk about over-protective!!!!  That is probably the reason why my nephew (only 5 years old) is growing up to be a germ-a-phobic wuss!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Mothers can be odd...  DH and I are taking our nephew and our step-niece to WDW this December.  We all got together to talk about the vacation a week ago.  Let me preface this by saying that our step-niece is a well behaved, responsible 13 year old.  Fully capable of deciding what she would like to do when we are in the parks.  As we are talking about the rides and our niece is getting excited, her mom steps in and says, "I'm fine with everything but not the rollercoasters.  I don't want you to go on those, they make me nervous."  Ok... first, this is DISNEY!!!!  With the exception of maybe RnR, none of the coasters are that bad.  And second.... she's 13!!!!  Regardless, her mom won't be with us and what she won't know....
> 
> Talk about over-protective!!!!  That is probably the reason why my nephew (only 5 years old) is growing up to be a germ-a-phobic wuss!



 When DH and I took our nicce 3 going on 4 at the time I had no problems with SIL No restrictions, no hesitation about her going with us, nothing--  

As a matter of fact- SIL and BIL took off to the Keys while we had the kid


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> When DH and I took our nicce 3 going on 4 at the time I had no problems with SIL No restrictions, no hesitation about her going with us, nothing--
> 
> As a matter of fact- SIL and BIL took off to the Keys while we had the kid




That would make my planning easier.  The last thing she asked me for was copies of the menus for the restaurants we want to eat at...  I guess she figures that we aren't going to feed the kids either!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> That would make my planning easier.  The last thing she asked me for was copies of the menus for the restaurants we want to eat at...  I guess she figures that we aren't going to feed the kids either!



Oh I made sure I took a pic of her eating one of those nice big chocolate chip cookies from the Main Street Bakery!! Actually SIL didn't care. I warned her that I am going to feed her whatever she wants to keep her happy.........and not crying!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> I guess she figures that we aren't going to feed the kids either!



Well you know how us childless people are- no responsibility whatsoever! 

It's a wonder we can take care of a plant - I guess we ALL can't be like some of THE PERFECT SUPER MOMS OF THE WORLD who do no wrong!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Mothers can be odd...



ummmm-hello?! Tag Fairy- can you *PLEASE *make this Lisa's first tag--


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Well you know how us childless people are- no responsibility whatsoever!
> 
> It's a wonder we can take care of a plant - I guess we ALL can't be like some of THE PERFECT SUPER MOMS OF THE WORLD who do no wrong!



I commit plant murder all the time. I have one rubber tree that has been alive for 10 yrs. I don't know how but it has. On the other hand I have managed to keep my dog alive for almost 10 yrs. Amazing. He thinks I am his mommy. I guess I can change my name from Hixski to Mommy2Duncan. NOT!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> I can see them all becoming a "clique"



They can become the Mommysofweakbladders clique.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> I guess I can change my name from Hixski to Mommy2Duncan. NOT!!!!!!!!!!



 Actually I wouldn't be surprised if that name was already taken


----------



## Liisa

Taking care of plants... that's easy.  When they wilt, you water them!  Going on that theory... when the kids can't stand up anymore, you feed them.  I think I've got this covered!!!  And she's worried?!!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Taking care of plants... that's easy.  When they wilt, you water them!  Going on that theory... when the kids can't stand up anymore, you feed them.  I think I've got this covered!!!  And she's worried?!!



Hey that's my theory also!!! Sounds good to me!

I think you can handle it if you follow those easy instructions!


----------



## Chris Rex

Liisa said:


> Taking care of plants... that's easy.  When they wilt, you water them!  Going on that theory... when the kids can't stand up anymore, you feed them.  I think I've got this covered!!!  And she's worried?!!



Sounds easy in theory. I am so AMAZINGLY lazy that I am now imfamous among the plant kingdom as being a cold blooded killer. I mean, how lazy do you have to be to let plants die? More than once. I am terrible!  

I won't even mention my even more infamous 'Fishtank of Doom' incident...

 

-Rex


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Hey don't feel bad.  I somehow managed to kill a cactus.


----------



## maddhatir

I just tossed a dead one out about a month ago!


----------



## Liisa

Maybe that should be the test...

Can you keep a plant alive?  "No"

Then you should be childfree... Congratulations!  

(And no fair purposely murdering the plants to join our club!)


----------



## plgrn

Chris Rex said:


> Sounds easy in theory. I am so AMAZINGLY lazy that I am now imfamous among the plant kingdom as being a cold blooded killer. I mean, how lazy do you have to be to let plants die? More than once. I am terrible!



Yep. My house is like Auschwitz for plants (sorry that wasn't PC). CR, I'm enjoying your website. LOL at your dog's Indian name.


----------



## islandmum

this is a great topic!

I was not kid friendly, not interested but always supposed I'd have them, one day.

and then one day - out of the blue - I just desperately wanted to start a family with dh, and rather suprisingly (after more than 10 years on the pill!) we fell prgnant in that first week  

to say I wanted one and then suddenly to be having one was a shock.

and now as a parent of 2 ..... TO ME its my ultimate joy.  The love I have for them, the harmony in our family, its just made us.

BUT - I totally respect and understand why many people do not want chikdren at all ..... why people say "its SELFISH" I'll never understand.  Why is it selfish to go on vaca's?  why is it selfish to spend your earnings on nice things like cars, dinners etc...?

and most of all its completely UNSELFISH in the fact that by ensuring you dont have children who you are not committed to having or raising.  I know a person, has a child who was a "suprise" pregnancy, and she adores her ..... but you know she has those feelings of "I wish I was alone like before".  She would never say, or I guess admit ... but you just know.

so to all those choosing not to have kids, tell people who are amazed as to why not that its a good thing .... the world is overpopulated enough as it is!!

Motherhood has enhanced my life, its made me so happy, but for others it can be a nightmare and children arent something you can exchange and refund .... they're for life - and some!


----------



## maddhatir

Listening to Howard Stern right now- and they played a clip from The View- Elizabeth Hasselbeck was announcing she was pregnant and the crowd went WILD- you actually heard some screams.  woo hoo

After the clip, Artie said - "Women are so weird- listen to how they react to the news of her being pregnant- a regular applause would have been just fine." He went on to say- he didn't understand the big deal because "A retarded serial killer can become pregnant!" 

Robin said but Artie-- "this is a great accomplishment for some women"- and Artie responded- "take a look around you- not all of them are great accomplishments"


----------



## LindsayDunn228

maddhatir said:


> Listening to Howard Stern right now- and they played a clip from The View- Elizabeth Hasselbeck was announcing she was pregnant and the crowd went WILD- you actually heard some screams.  woo hoo
> 
> After the clip, Artie said - "Women are so weird- listen to how they react to the news of her being pregnant- a regular applause would have been just fine." He went on to say- he didn't understand the big deal because "A retarded serial killer can become pregnant!"
> 
> Robin said but Artie-- "this is a great accomplishment for some women"- and Artie responded- "take a look around you- not all of them are great accomplishments"


----------



## maddhatir

I am bumping this thread b/c it is almost Mother's day!! Our favorite holiday.  

And I am sure someone here will be told on this oh so special day- "Now don't you just wish YOU can have a day where they celebrate you?" I will say -"yeah- it's called MY BIRTHDAY!" besides that, I celebrate my freedom everyday! 

Not sure if any of you hear this from some of the "guys" you know-- every year they have to tell me I can celebrate mother's day b/c I am a ....well, you know.....ha ha guys are so funny! dorks!


----------



## Liisa

I got a mother's day gift!  My puppy Khabo tore apart one of my azalea bushes and ran into the house to give me one of the beautiful flowering branches this morning!  UGH!!!  Last year the deer ate all the buds.  I was sooo excited to see them in bloom this year, but I guess that is over with!  I was such a good parent and scolded him promptly (but secretly I was laughing at how foolish he looked with the azalea branch sticking out of his mouth!!!)     Puppies!  

So, if anyone needs any flowering bushes pulled out of their landscaping, I've got just the dog to do it!!!


----------



## Hixski

Liisa said:


> I got a mother's day gift!  My puppy Khabo tore apart one of my azalea bushes and ran into the house to give me one of the beautiful flowering branches this morning!  UGH!!!  Last year the deer ate all the buds.  I was sooo excited to see them in bloom this year, but I guess that is over with!  I was such a good parent and scolded him promptly (but secretly I was laughing at how foolish he looked with the azalea branch sticking out of his mouth!!!)     Puppies!
> 
> So, if anyone needs any flowering bushes pulled out of their landscaping, I've got just the dog to do it!!!



When my golden Duncan was between 6-9 months he would pull the grass up by the roots from our yard. I thought DH was going to kill him. The madder DH got the more the silly dog thought he was playing with him. At least that stage didn't last too long. I have a couple of new pictures of him with a new toy and his summer haircut. He is still handsome for going on 10 yrs old next month. He will get me a card for Mothers Day. He usually buys me something too.


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> I am bumping this thread b/c it is almost Mother's day!! Our favorite holiday.
> 
> And I am sure someone here will be told on this oh so special day- "Now don't you just wish YOU can have a day where they celebrate you?" I will say -"yeah- it's called MY BIRTHDAY!" besides that, I celebrate my freedom everyday!
> 
> Not sure if any of you hear this from some of the "guys" you know-- every year they have to tell me I can celebrate mother's day b/c I am a ....well, you know.....ha ha guys are so funny! dorks!



LOL I do celebrate Mother's Day! Every year dh gets me a card and present from our furry babies and I do the same for Father's Day!  This year I suspect it's Sephora! lol


----------



## Poppinsme

Ha Ha!! Yes all my hairy children and my DH give me a nice card.    And then all the horses want carrots!  Yes mom lets celebrate.  Carrots yum.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Poppinsme said:


> Ha Ha!! Yes all my hairy children and my DH give me a nice card.    And then all the horses want carrots!  Yes mom lets celebrate.  Carrots yum.



 That's so funny! I get to celebrate by giving my 200 pound baby a bath and finishing up his summer shave. Lots of celebrating going on around here too.   But you know what? I wouldn't trade it in for the world! Our furry babies are more grateful and well mannered than normal kids.  I love being their mama!


----------



## Chris Rex

Ok, just jumping on board with all the Doggie pics.  
Forgive the indulgence...

They wouldn't stop bothering me until I put their pictures up; You know how they can be.   

We used the 'green screen' behind them to extract the background so we could use 'the boys' in our wedding invitation.

To this day, I think we're the only people in history to use the word 'B**tard' in our wedding invitations. 

It's especially fun when you couple in the fact that it's Mickey Mouse who is using the word.

True story.


----------



## maddhatir

Chris Rex said:


> Ok, just jumping on board with all the Doggie pics.
> Forgive the indulgence...
> 
> They wouldn't stop bothering me until I put their pictures up; You know how they can be.
> 
> We used the 'green screen' behind them to extract the background so we could use 'the boys' in our wedding invitation.
> 
> To this day, I think we're the only people in history to use the word 'B**tard' in our wedding invitations.
> 
> It's especially fun when you couple in the fact that it's Mickey Mouse who is using the word.
> 
> True story.



OMG- they are so stinking cute!!!!!!!!

 OK- I need to know- why was Mickey cussing on your wedding invite


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> This year I suspect it's Sephora! lol



 oooo- your babies have nice taste


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> oooo- your babies have nice taste



I am hoping my furbaby gets me a gift card to Spa Winghaven.


----------



## shantay1008

I hope it's okay if I jump in here.... I just wanted to say "more power to you" to all of you--what's the word?--child-free couples. I am actually happy when  people are honest and say they don't want to have kids, because children are so utterly all-consuming (I mean that in a nice way ). In this day and age when we have way more than enough people on the planet, why have kids just to fulfill some ideal or expectation? I just don't get it.

What some may not realize is that quite often people who don't have children are deeply involved with others who do. We have four kids (three birth and one adopted), and we are blessed to have two actual uncles and several honorary aunts and uncles (college roommates, etc.) who for one reason or another haven't had kids. They provide so much support for us, and they love spending time with our kids. And then they happily give them back to us!

It's maddening when people make judgements, but some folks seem compelled to do so. Shoot, we've even had people criticize us for adopting internationally rather than domestically (we had good reasons for doing so, thank you very much). So you see, no one is immune! 

Thanks for letting me put my 2 cents in!


----------



## Chris Rex

maddhatir said:


> OMG- they are so stinking cute!!!!!!!!
> 
> OK- I need to know- why was Mickey cussing on your wedding invite



Thank you  

If anyone wishes to see the invite, just drop me a PM and I'll either email it to you or pm you a link... I don't think it would be suitable material for potential kid viewing ;-) . Suprisingly, everyone in my family accepted it in good humor (which means they've accepted how demented we are   )

-Rex


----------



## Liisa

Chris... too cute!  

What are their names?


----------



## Chris Rex

Liisa said:


> Chris... too cute!
> 
> What are their names?



The little butterball is Biscuit. His older brother is Speck. We named him 'Speck' because we ASSUMED he would be... oh.. you know.. NOT a 12lb chihuahua. Yeesh, were we wrong!   

-Chris


----------



## Liisa

Chris,

very funny wedding invite!  I love that you guys had fun with it.  My dear mother would have fainted, but she is particular about weddings and wanted a formal affair.  I will admit it was beautiful, so I can't fault her.  But yours sounds like it would have been so much FUN!!!!  

Liisa


----------



## maddhatir

I just had an idea after looking at some pics of Chris Rex's home (really cool!) I was saying we should post some pics on this thread of things in our home that we can have just sitting around etc b/c we do not have to worry about kiddies getting into them or worse maybe getting hurt.

I will go first--

Everytime the kids come over- I have to move this little chess set b/c I KNOW they will try and eat the pieces





And my niece has (on several occasions) ran into the house and slid on this area rug right on her tush





.....the scary thing is...the rug is in at the kitchen door from the porch and as you can see the opening on the other side leads down the basement We are bad adults not to have a door to our basement- that is b/c we have our living area down there and it would be a hassel to put a door there- when the little ones come- we put something in front of it.





And before I put this "table" in front of the setee- she slip on the rug and went under the sofa I am laughing b/c she didn't get hurt- but to see her slide under it made me laugh





PS- Chris that "table" in the last pic is the toilet I was telling you about here it is open.....





AND while I am at it-- here are the strangers above my mantle! For all the other CF peeps- I picked these pics up at a yard sale and I have no idea who they are- I just like the pics- people that come to my home ask me if they are family!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> AND while I am at it-- here are the strangers above my mantle! For all the other CF peeps- I picked these pics up at a yard sale and I have no idea who they are- I just like the pics- people that come to my home ask me if they are family!



That's funny. Our family background is less than reputable and when you add extreme poverty onto that,you wind up with hardly any photographs of the ancestors. My aunt found an old picture she like at an auction, gave the guy a name, and put it up in her house. She has this whole story made up about "Uncle so and so" that she tells people who ask.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> That's funny. Our family background is less than reputable and when you add extreme poverty onto that,you wind up with hardly any photographs of the ancestors. My aunt found an old picture she like at an auction, gave the guy a name, and put it up in her house. She has this whole story made up about "Uncle so and so" that she tells people who ask.



 


I just can't imagine family members letting these pics go-- I just love old pics- so that is why I can't understand it......

but-- if you look at the other pics on my mantle-- now THEY ARE family! DH's grandmother loves to give me old pics of the family b/c she knows I will display them, sh tries to put the names of the people and who they are ie- aunts, so and so's grandparents etc. I have a bunch more that I need frames for and I can put them out.


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


>



Love the toilet!!!! Our house would be fairly kid friendly. Or in our case dog friendly. Duncan is an 80lb dog with a dust mop of a tail. We can't do too much clutter on things or it gets swept off with the waggy tail. We do have an open stairwell in our ranch house to the basement. I will post a picture tomorrow. That open stairwell is not for small children.


----------



## Hixski

Chris Rex said:


> Thank you
> 
> If anyone wishes to see the invite, just drop me a PM and I'll either email it to you or pm you a link... I don't think it would be suitable material for potential kid viewing ;-) . Suprisingly, everyone in my family accepted it in good humor (which means they've accepted how demented we are   )
> 
> -Rex



DH and I are a few years older than you. Ok, a lot. 47 and 48. Our families just think we are free spirits. My mother does not "get" me even to this day. She doesn't understand the concept of marching to the beat of your own drummer.


----------



## plgrn

Just a little vent...well...not really a vent, but more of an "eye-roller." We are leaving Friday for a long weekend at WDW so I was checking out some dining reviews over on the dining boards. A mom could only post pictures of about half the places they ate because she was "settling down" her three year old "dealing with" her three year old or her three year old was "wound up" so she was unable to physically take pictures.  She kept reiterating "three year old" like that's something normal and to be expected as his age. Ummmm #1 what is Dad doing this whole time #2 if your child is so ill-behaved what were you thinking taking him to WDW in the first place!!

She took a picture of him asleep in his stoller and said "Yay, he fell asleep so we can enjoy a child-free meal!!" Then no pics of dessert b/c the kid woke up.

To boot, she is pregnant again.  

I just know someone is going to creep over here and flame me for this, but that whole scenairo just takes the cake for me. WTH??


----------



## Hixski

plgrn said:


> Just a little vent...well...not really a vent, but more of an "eye-roller." We are leaving Friday for a long weekend at WDW so I was checking out some dining reviews over on the dining boards. A mom could only post pictures of about half the places they ate because she was "settling down" her three year old "dealing with" her three year old or her three year old was "wound up" so she was unable to physically take pictures.  She kept reiterating "three year old" like that's something normal and to be expected as his age. Ummmm #1 what is Dad doing this whole time #2 if your child is so ill-behaved what were you thinking taking him to WDW in the first place!!
> 
> She took a picture of him asleep in his stoller and said "Yay, he fell asleep so we can enjoy a child-free meal!!" Then no pics of dessert b/c the kid woke up.
> 
> To boot, she is pregnant again.
> 
> I just know someone is going to creep over here and flame me for this, but that whole scenairo just takes the cake for me. WTH??



We have good friends that have a 2yr old and a 5yr old boys. They are typical boys to say the least. The funny thing is lately they have been getting a babysitter quite a bit more than they used to. We were with them for Cinco last week. They were telling us they were glad we could be there with them. They were really needing to ditch the kids. We just laughed. I know they say things like that to us because we won't make them feel like bad parents for wanting to get away from the kids sometimes.


----------



## dolcezena

Hey all!

Just wanted to pop in really quick & say hi! My last 2 weeks have been nuts (in a good way). Have I mentioned before how much I love my job?

2 weeks ago I was in Calgary to be a judge in a wine show, where conviniently my mom & oh-so-great stepdad live & the last week was our city's wine festival. 29 hours of wine tastings, luncheons & "function." AND I get paid for it!

Anywho, I'll have to take time later to read back & see what's been going on - right now I have laundry to do, dogs to take out & overdue taxes to complete! See ya on the flip side.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Just a little vent...well...not really a vent, but more of an "eye-roller." We are leaving Friday for a long weekend at WDW so I was checking out some dining reviews over on the dining boards. A mom could only post pictures of about half the places they ate because she was "settling down" her three year old "dealing with" her three year old or her three year old was "wound up" so she was unable to physically take pictures.  She kept reiterating "three year old" like that's something normal and to be expected as his age. Ummmm #1 what is Dad doing this whole time #2 if your child is so ill-behaved what were you thinking taking him to WDW in the first place!!
> 
> She took a picture of him asleep in his stoller and said "Yay, he fell asleep so we can enjoy a child-free meal!!" Then no pics of dessert b/c the kid woke up.
> 
> To boot, she is pregnant again.
> 
> I just know someone is going to creep over here and flame me for this, but that whole scenairo just takes the cake for me. WTH??



Don't worry about "them" We got your back!
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




You know what I love- when you mention that you just want to sit down to a nice "adult" meal and you get jumped on. 

But seriously- It really is getting harder and harder to find an "adult" type restaurant in Disney- we are being over-run by character buffets anymore- and I am sure there are more to come!

How about the Tusker House


----------



## Liisa

Maddhatir,

I'm with you - completely disappointed about Tusker House.  I really enjoyed eating there.  On our last trip, we had luck with a quiet adult dinner at Bistro de Paris and the Yachtsmen Steakhouse wasn't bad.  

As for houses... our house is also pretty kid friendly (because of the dogs). But we did spend a college tuition on our backyard project (still in process)!     No way would we have been able to do that if we had to save for Junior's future!!!

Luckily, the dogs have no plans for higher education.   

Liisa


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> As for houses... our house is also pretty kid friendly (because of the dogs). But we did spend a college tuition on our backyard project (still in process)!     No way would we have been able to do that if we had to save for Junior's future!!!
> 
> Luckily, the dogs have no plans for higher education.
> 
> Liisa



Well you better explain to Khabo that his college education money is being used to foot your backyard project and there will be no more pulling up azaleas!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Well you better explain to Khabo that his college education money is being used to foot your backyard project and there will be no more pulling up azaleas!


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> How about the Tusker House




 Except it's Donald themed for breakfast!   

Mom and I like character meals, but the kiddies sometimes make it not worth it. This trip we are dining at The Garden Grille which is a great setup because you can't even see the people sitting around you if you get an outside booth (which we always have). It's like the characters are there just for you with no kiddos hanging on their tails.


----------



## Liisa

Well, after the azalea episode, I figured Khabo was more "hands on" and trade schools are typically cheaper than 4 year colleges.   

He's such a stinker!


----------



## Hixski

Here are a couple of the non-kid friendly things in my house.

Open stairwell.






Curio cabinet.


----------



## HockeyKat

We have many non-kid-friendly things in our house... hot tub, kegerator, wine rack, full bar, open staircase, many wires, a white sofa and two white chaise lounges...    

I love my kid-free lifestyle.   Especially after a trip to WDW, watching world-class-hissy-fits from 9 yr olds and weary parents pushing a stroller w/ a 2 yr old and dragging 5 yr old while carrying an infant in a papoose and 7 mos pregnant.   Oh and I forgot, running me over with said stroller.


----------



## plgrn

HockeyKat said:


> Oh and I forgot, running me over with said stroller.



Yes. You will let them plow you down with their stroller and you will LIKE it. Disney is a place for FAMILIES.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Yes. You will let them plow you down with their stroller and you will LIKE it. Disney is a place for FAMILIES.



You forgot to add---- And if you don't like it-- stay the heck HOME!!!!

WHY would you go to Disney KNOWING darn well that families will be there plowing you down.


----------



## Princess Bella Luna

shantay1008 said:


> We have four kids (three birth and one adopted), and we are blessed to have two actual uncles and several honorary aunts and uncles (college roommates, etc.) who for one reason or another haven't had kids. They provide so much support for us, and they love spending time with our kids. And then they happily give them back to us!
> 
> It's maddening when people make judgements, but some folks seem compelled to do so. Shoot, we've even had people criticize us for adopting internationally rather than domestically (we had good reasons for doing so, thank you very much). So you see, no one is immune!
> 
> Thanks for letting me put my 2 cents in!



Yeow - We're all Darned if you do and Darned if ya don't.


----------



## HockeyKat

However, does anyone here really feel that WDW sort of discriminates against you because you are childfree?  I feel sometimes like the fat white couple (us) gets strange looks.


----------



## Princess Bella Luna

HockeyKat said:


> However, does anyone here really feel that WDW sort of discriminates against you because you are childfree?  I feel sometimes like the fat white couple (us) gets strange looks.



Seriously? I've seen may couples go to Disney without any problem, no one seems to mind they went child-free. 

In some aspects though, a good deal of all goes to "families" ... and the definition of family is "sets of people with children under 13."

I have seen people, adults alone, get yelled at by mommies and daddies for wanting pictures with characters.  A even saw a teen about age 15 or so get sneered at by a mom who said, "The one who's too old for pictures with Mickey Mouse?!" When a CM directed her to the back of the line.


----------



## maddhatir

Princess Bella Luna said:


> Seriously? I've seen may couples go to Disney without any problem, no one seems to mind they went child-free.
> 
> In some aspects though, a good deal of all goes to "families" ... and the definition of family is "sets of people with children under 13."
> 
> I have seen people, adults alone, get yelled at by mommies and daddies for wanting pictures with characters.  A even saw a teen about age 15 or so get sneered at by a mom who said, "The one who's too old for pictures with Mickey Mouse?!" When a CM directed her to the back of the line.




I have never noticed people actually IN Disney doing anything like that- But- here on the boards if you make a comment about wanting an "adult dinner" you get jumped on. You have watch what you say or some of the nazi moms will rip you a new one.- 

Well, actually it is not only the nazi moms- even if you make a comment about how you do not like how Disney is changing to too many character buffets and what about us adults- you have to get a lecture....about *use your best gruff know-it-all voice* "wellllllll...now, the demographics are pointing to families being the primary visitors to the parks and if this continues to happen, you will see an increase in these buffets popping up more and more......blaaaaaaah, blaaaaaah, blaaaah"


Give me a break!  

Sorry- that was just a bit of a rant there.


----------



## HockeyKat

Maybe we are just overly sensitive...

We got in an outright altercation with someone on this trip that tried to use her child as an excuse for her boorish behavior, so maybe that is why I am asking.   Btw, her child (~5) was behaving very nicely and was not the issue at all, it was the mom and her mouth.

I am not really a character-type person so we haven't done the meet-n-greets or char buffets, so I haven't really seen that aspect.

I was alone once to ride Soarin' (DH was at a conference) and the "family" behind me kept a 3 pace distance and I was getting that green-head-'n-horns stare.

I definitely, definitely get it from friends and coworkers though... *you're* going to WDW?  But it is for *families*.


----------



## julm26

I'm not trying to flame anyone.  But my DH and I where once child-free and now we have a two yr old.  We went to Disney five times before she was born.  Now we are taking her in Sept. for the first time.  It will be a totally different experience but one I am looking forward to.  I am so surprised that so many of you would be so unforgiving of people with children.  You made your choices not to have kids and we made our choices to have them.  Disney is for children - the child in all of us.  Those of us with children just now see it through different eyes.   We would love to have an "adult" dinner. But I so cannot wait to see my daughter's eyes when she meets Mickey for the first time!!

 So I warn you now - watch out for my crazy 2yr old and her mother pushing that stroller - I may just run you over....


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

plgrn said:


> Yes. You will let them plow you down with their stroller and you will LIKE it. Disney is a place for FAMILIES.



LOL! 

I also liked a thread where a woman said a parent should be able to stand in line for a ride or characters and then bring her hubby and their 5 or 6 kids  into the line in front of her when they got to the end, so the kids wouldn't have to wait and "isn't it all for the children?" Of course, I'll just wait in line for 2 hours until all the kids are done, and then we can get our picture taken or go on the ride. If there's time, and all the kids are done of course. It is all for them.  

And I would love an adult only restaurant. Palo on DCL is super successful and my dream is an upscale adult restaurant at the Poly - lots of fresh seafood, perhaps a celeb chef like Sam Choy, great food, an outdoor tiki bar, view of the lagoon, fireworks and castle and a high-up treehouse like feel with tons of windows, so it's almost like one of those tropical huts in Tahiti that sit above the water on stilts. No yelling, no crayons, no strollers, just adults enjoying a relaxing meal.


----------



## HockeyKat

Lulu an adult-only restaurant would be great!  I think that Bistro de Paris and Vic&Albert's both discourage kids, but they are super-$$.

I despise the line-holding thing about more than anything else that I have seen in WDW.  If you need to do something else, then do it, and have your entire party stand in line.   About the only forgiveness I have on that front is one person in the party with an issue... bathroom need, needs to step out to throw out a drink cup, etc.   

Also, any sentence that begins "I don't mean to... *but*..."  should just leave out the first part of the sentence and say what they actually mean, which is, evil kid-free folk should LOVE kids and WANT kids and oh isn't my 2-yr old CUTE.

Regardless, my issue is almost never with the kid, it is with the self-entitled parent who uses the child as an excuse to behave badly and abuse others, which include child-free couples, singles, other families, elders, etc.   

Edited to add that I agree w/ a later poster... child-free is the conscious decision to never have children.


----------



## WDWguru

julm26 - two things

1. You were never childfree. The very definition of the word is "don't have children, don't want them, ever" - it doesn't apply to those who haven't had them yet, whose kids have left the nest, etc. Nitpicky, yes, but an important distinction in attitudes.



> You made your choices not to have kids and we made our choices to have them.


2. The difference is that my choice doesn't impact society - yours does. My choice isn't inflicted on the general population - yours is. I personally (and I think most here would agree) don't have any problem with good parents who raise their children to be polite, respectful members of society. Unfortunately, there are all too many people who do not - hence my previous use of the word "inflict".

Not trying to stir the pot, just hoping to clarify. (And I'll watch out for your stroller!)


----------



## LoveStitch626

julm26 said:


> You made your choices not to have kids and we made our choices to have them.  Disney is for children - the child in all of us.  Those of us with children just now see it through different eyes.   We would love to have an "adult" dinner. But I so cannot wait to see my daughter's eyes when she meets Mickey for the first time!!
> 
> So I warn you now - watch out for my crazy 2yr old and her mother pushing that stroller - I may just run you over....



You're kidding me right? 


So basically, because parents are seeing it through different eyes we're supposed to scoot aside? Sorry doll, but not everyone is enamoured by kids and don't feel the same way. We pay just as much as the parents and we've got every right to take our turn in whatever we choose to do whether it be stand in line to meet a princess or visit at a character meal. You'd think parents would want to set an example for their little dahlins and teach them how to take turns and be respectful of others. It all goes down the tubes (if they do try) at WDW. The people with false senses of entitlement are the ones running down people with their strollers because they think "Kid = Right to run wild at WDW FOR THE CHILDREN naturally".


----------



## Muushka

Does anyone read the "Dear Abby" type articles in the paper?
Today was priceless.

A husband and wife with 5 children was waiting to be seated in a restaurant.  The kids were antsy while waiting(because they are, after all, children).  They were finally being seated.  As the rather large family passed by a couple, the couple asked the hostess not to seat the family by them.  The father is insulted by this and exchanges words with them about why don't they want his family to sit by them.  He asked "Abby" or whoever it was if he was out of place.

Abby answered she would not want to sit by his kids either!

Yes parents, trust me, not everyone is in love with your child/children!


----------



## Liisa

WDWguru said:


> I personally (and I think most here would agree) don't have any problem with good parents who raise their children to be polite, respectful members of society. Unfortunately, there are all too many people who do not - hence my previous use of the word "inflict".



Well said and I agree completely!!!   

There are far too many children who feel entitled because their families are afraid to discipline - heaven forbid we upset junior by making him / her behave!


----------



## Princess Bella Luna

HockeyKat said:


> Also, any sentence that begins "I don't mean to... *but*..."  should just leave out the first part of the sentence and say what they actually mean, which is, evil kid-free folk should LOVE kids and WANT kids and oh isn't my 2-yr old CUTE.



All the while Jr. is screaming his lungs off while banging his sippy cup into the table ... 

PS this has got to be the best thread here!


----------



## Hixski

Muushka said:


> Does anyone read the "Dear Abby" type articles in the paper?
> Today was priceless.
> 
> A husband and wife with 5 children was waiting to be seated in a restaurant.  The kids were antsy while waiting(because they are, after all, children).  They were finally being seated.  As the rather large family passed by a couple, the couple asked the hostess not to seat the family by them.  The father is insulted by this and exchanges words with them about why don't they want his family to sit by them.  He asked "Abby" or whoever it was if he was out of place.
> 
> Abby answered she would not want to sit by his kids either!
> 
> Yes parents, trust me, not everyone is in love with your child/children!



I have said numerous times that is why DH and I sit at the bar when we go out.  Amen, Dear Abby.


----------



## QueenGoblin

These posts make me  but I do feel a bit like an interloper because I do have children.  I work as a children's librarian and I see bad parenting everyday.  My personal favorite is when a child is doing something obviously dangerous in front of a parent and that parent says nothing until I step in...then its "Jimmy, the LIBRARIAN says you shouldn't stick the paperclip into your nose while jumping off the chair." 

That being said, it is getting increasingly difficult for good parents to dicipline in public.  I know of several instances where parents have had the cops called on them because someone in a public place thought that the parent's form of discipline was abusive.  The examples I know of personally involved open handed swatting of a child's clothed behind.  In a climate right now where a legislator in California is trying to make it ILLEGAL to physically discipline a child in any way (including spanking), is it any wonder that parents think twice about disciplining their child in public, even if it doesn't involve any physical contact?

I am the parent of a very strong willed child (aka stubborn as a mule).  It is her personality and we have spoken with her teachers and her pediatrician about her bevavior and they all have said that this is her personality and we just have to continue to be firm until she gets out of this phase where she "tests" us.  So she has privledges taken away, she gets removed, screaming, from situations when she is not behaving, and in certain circumstances, she even gets spanked.  But have there been instances where, out of context, she would look like a child who was just out of control? Of course!  

I guess my point is...I think families with kids should respectfully share the World with those who do not.  And yes, there are too many bad parents out there, but I hope that you will give me and others like me, the benefit of the doubt when you see us lugging a screaming 4 year old across a parking lot.  Some of us are trying very hard to raise the doctors, lawyers, postal workers, whatever, who will serve you 20-30 years from now.


----------



## myladyisatramp

Its really nobody's business whether you have children or not, tell them to mind their own business, its your life and you will do as you see fit. As someone else on this board said who knows in 10 years from now as your life progress's you may change your mind. I for one could not imagine my life without my 3 children who are now all beautiful adults. I think in my life right now I would be so different without them. But as I said everyone is different
I hope you tell them to lay off.


----------



## Hixski

myladyisatramp said:


> Its really nobody's business whether you have children or not, tell them to mind their own business, its your life and you will do as you see fit. As someone else on this board said who knows in 10 years from now as your life progress's you may change your mind. I for one could not imagine my life without my 3 children who are now all beautiful adults. I think in my life right now I would be so different without them. But as I said everyone is different
> I hope you tell them to lay off.



In 10 yrs from now as my life progresses I won't be changing my mind. In 10 yrs I will be 57.  
Some of us on this board are definately not 20 somethings.


----------



## Muushka

Hixski said:


> In 10 yrs from now as my life progresses I won't be changing my mind. In 10 yrs I will be 57.
> Some of us on this board are definately not 20 somethings.



I will be 2 years short of qualifying for Medicare in 10 years


----------



## Liisa

myladyisatramp said:


> As someone else on this board said who knows in 10 years from now as your life progress's you may change your mind.



Likewise, I'm sure that there are more than a few parents out there who, when there darling infant reaches ten years old, may also change their mind...


----------



## myladyisatramp

Its really nobody's business whether you have children or not, tell them to mind their own business, its your life and you will do as you see fit. As someone else on this board said who knows in 10 years from now as your life progress's you may change your mind. I for one could not imagine my life without my 3 children who are now all beautiful adults. I think in my life right now I would be so different without them. But as I said everyone is different
I hope you tell them to lay off.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> In 10 yrs from now as my life progresses I won't be changing my mind. In 10 yrs I will be 57.
> Some of us on this board are definately not 20 somethings.



I find it funny when people comment on us changing our minds- as HIX said- we WON"T be changing our minds, ever. I have ALWAYS known I didn't want kids. Even when I was a child- sure, I played with baby dolls- but I can't ever remember saying "When I have kids" or "I want a baby when I grow up" It is just something "in" us.....you just KNOW it will never happen, BECASUE WE DO NOT WANT IT TO-- there is no changing your mind.

I may have mentioned this before, but when DH and I went to Disney in Nov/Dec 2006 with BIL and SIL and their 2 kids-- I could CLEARLY see the "oblivious parents" thing going on. I was VERY aware of how the kids acted every minute and there were MANY times I corrected my 5 yr old niece for things that her mother was just letting go. I think it is b/c I don't have kids- and when I see other kids doing what she was doing- it would annoy me! So why would I let HER annoy other people!?? I love her to death, but there were times when she was a bit rude or impatient and I explained to her that she is not the only one in the park! 

Her mother wasn't doing it 

I think parents need to realize just what I told a 5 YR OLD! and practice it themselves and teach it to their kids- "there are other people around you, respect them as you would want them to respect you" 

.........and stop being annoying


----------



## MomNeedsVacay

I've never seen such a bitter group of people before.... how sad....  keep it up. Its interesting.


----------



## maddhatir

MomNeedsVacay said:


> I've never seen such a bitter group of people before.... how sad....  keep it up. Its interesting.



hmmm- WE are the one's that are biiter however your DIS name pretty much sums up the fact that you need a vacay from the kids.......OKaaaaayyyy? 

keep it up


----------



## MomNeedsVacay




----------



## maddhatir

Hmmmm- It seems we have a little troll--- 

I am sure the MODS- would be interesting in your  

Keep eating your popcorn!


----------



## Muushka

Not meaning to flame the new visitors, but I guess the question I have is:
Why would someone with children even bother visiting this thread?

Surely there must be better ways to waste time.


----------



## maddhatir

Muushka said:


> Not meaning to flame the new visitors, but I guess the question I have is:
> Why would someone with children even bother visiting this thread?
> 
> Surely there must be better ways to waste time.



We have asked this of many of our trolls in the past- they are the ones with no lives that need to invade our happy thread! They come and go- as you can see by her # of posts, she is new at this.  

She will go away. 

As we said in the past- we CF people do not go over the the family boards and stir the pot.


----------



## WDWguru

MomNeedsVacay - it may very well appear that way from the most recent few pages of this thread, but I encourage you -- if you truly are here to gain some knowledge and not just troll -- to go back and read the first few pages. It's an eye-opener, and I think you'll gain a whole new understanding and empathy for this often maligned and misunderstood group.


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:


> MomNeedsVacay - it may very well appear that way from the most recent few pages of this thread,



 Hold on- I do not believe any of our posts sound like we are "bitter" people. 

....just a bit "fed up" and venting. But what I was getting from her is that we are bitter b/c we do not have kids. 

Either way- no bitterness here!


----------



## Muushka

Nope, I'm not bitter either!  

Happy Saturday!


----------



## Hixski

No, not bitter here either. Just fed up like the rest at parents not parenting.

I am just going to leave a picture and story to go with it. We did the DCL cruise in September 2005 for our 20th anniversary. Our hostess asked at the beginning of the week if we were there for anything special. We told it was for our 20th anniversary but we were a couple of weeks early. She was from Russia and very sweet. We chatted with her all week. By the end of the week she told us we had been her favorites that week. She confided that she was almost done with her time on the ship and she really needed a break. She said it was so nice to do our room as it wasn't a wreck. She said every other cabin she had that week had children and the rooms were a terrible mess. *She asked why don't American people make their children mind???  * We told her she was asking the wrong people as we wondered the same thing. 

Now for the picture. She left this for us to come back to after dinner on the last sea day. For our anniversary and because we were her favorites that week. And not messy. She got a huge tip for that. She even had rose petals trailing from the door all the way in.






[/


----------



## MomNeedsVacay

maddhatir said:


> We have asked this of many of our trolls in the past- they are the ones with no lives that need to invade our happy thread! They come and go- as you can see by her # of posts, she is new at this.
> 
> She will go away.
> 
> As we said in the past- we CF people do not go over the the family boards and stir the pot.



  you have over 6,000 posts and you are saying that I, me, moi, have no LIFE.....


----------



## MomNeedsVacay

WDWguru said:


> MomNeedsVacay - it may very well appear that way from the most recent few pages of this thread, but I encourage you -- if you truly are here to gain some knowledge and not just troll -- to go back and read the first few pages. It's an eye-opener, and I think you'll gain a whole new understanding and empathy for this often maligned and misunderstood group.




I will do. Thanks.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

maddhatir said:


> I could CLEARLY see the "oblivious parents" thing going on.




I was at the movie theatre recently and there was an older kid behind me talking constantly. I thought, surely he'll stop when the movie comes on. 

Nope, he started narrating the movie incessantly. About 5-10 minutes into the movie (when I realized he didn't have the manners to stop talking without prompting), I turned around and said, "Would you please stop talking?"

At that point, I realized he was talking to his MOTHER. Now, why would a mom not teach her child that you don't talk during a movie??  The kid was about 15 or 16...way past the age to be learning simple manners.

I thought perhaps he had an attention disorder or something and maybe couldn't help himself (I wokred with special needs children for many years and I'm pretty patient and understanding with kids), but I was mistaken...I didn't hear another peep from him during the movie.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

HockeyKat said:


> Regardless, my issue is almost never with the kid, it is with the self-entitled parent who uses the child as an excuse to behave badly and abuse others, which include child-free couples, singles, other families, elders, etc.



When DH and I saw Davy Jones last Friday night, we got there fairly late and sat in the very last row. After we'd been sitting there about 10 minutes, some kids came up and sat next to us. Their mom said very loudly, "Oh, I bet you can't see because of the tree in the way!" Then she turned to her husband and said, "The kids can't see because these people took our seats!  These people took our seats!" 

She went on and on so that the kids were even embarrassed--"It's OK mom, it's no big deal!"

I completely ignored her. Of course, we weren't in her seats (there were no reserved seats for the concert and there was nobody in the row saving seats when we sat down  ) but she apparently was trying to guilt us into moving over so her kids could have a better view. (I'm guessing the seats were "theirs" for a previous show).  Yeah, like I should sit in front of a tree because you didn't get there early enough to get a better seat?? Get over yourself!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

HockeyKat said:


> However, does anyone here really feel that WDW sort of discriminates against you because you are childfree?  I feel sometimes like the fat white couple (us) gets strange looks.




I read a couple of years ago that 50% of visitors to Disney are adults visiting without kids (not that they are necessarily childfree, just that they do not have kids with them).

I think WDW has become remarkably more adult-oriented in the last 15 years. DH and I went to Epcot about 15 years ago and I remember being stopped by a cast member as we tried to leave the Mexico counter-service area with beers--he politely told us that we could not walk around Epcot with beers in our hand.  Now you can go anywhere with drinks.  There's a lot more adult-oriented entertainment, too.

I suspect a lot of people with kids at WDW are not having a very good time and are looking at you because they can't imagine why an adult would be there if they didn't have to be.   I know my brother has brought his children to WDW only because he feels obligated, and he and his wife really do not enjoy their time in the Magic Kingdom!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

Hixski said:


> No, not bitter here either. Just fed up like the rest at parents not parenting.
> 
> I am just going to leave a picture and story to go with it. We did the DCL cruise in September 2005 for our 20th anniversary. Our hostess asked at the beginning of the week if we were there for anything special. We told it was for our 20th anniversary but we were a couple of weeks early. She was from Russia and very sweet. We chatted with her all week. By the end of the week she told us we had been her favorites that week. She confided that she was almost done with her time on the ship and she really needed a break. She said it was so nice to do our room as it wasn't a wreck. She said every other cabin she had that week had children and the rooms were a terrible mess. *She asked why don't American people make their children mind???  * We told her she was asking the wrong people as we wondered the same thing.
> 
> Now for the picture. She left this for us to come back to after dinner on the last sea day. For our anniversary and because we were her favorites that week. And not messy. She got a huge tip for that. She even had rose petals trailing from the door all the way in.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> [/



How beautiful! What a lovely thing to do and she sounds like a sweet woman. 

I really hope you enjoyed that! Isn't DCL fabulous? I love the Vista Spa and Serenity Bay - those two places alone are worth the trip!

Her simple question certainly says a lot! I really don't understand why American parents in the past few years seem to have just given up. I have a couple theories but it's so widespread that it's tough to say. I do hope there's a turn around soon. Or else, the fall of America may just follow.


----------



## Muushka

Hixski said:


> No, not bitter here either. Just fed up like the rest at parents not parenting.
> 
> I am just going to leave a picture and story to go with it. We did the DCL cruise in September 2005 for our 20th anniversary. Our hostess asked at the beginning of the week if we were there for anything special. We told it was for our 20th anniversary but we were a couple of weeks early. She was from Russia and very sweet. We chatted with her all week. By the end of the week she told us we had been her favorites that week. She confided that she was almost done with her time on the ship and she really needed a break. She said it was so nice to do our room as it wasn't a wreck. She said every other cabin she had that week had children and the rooms were a terrible mess. *She asked why don't American people make their children mind???  * We told her she was asking the wrong people as we wondered the same thing.
> 
> Now for the picture. She left this for us to come back to after dinner on the last sea day. For our anniversary and because we were her favorites that week. And not messy. She got a huge tip for that. She even had rose petals trailing from the door all the way in.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> [/



Gosh, we PAID for our romantic turn down and it was not nearly as beautiful as this is.  Just lovely!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

PrincessKitty1 said:


> When DH and I saw Davy Jones last Friday night, we got there fairly late and sat in the very last row. After we'd been sitting there about 10 minutes, some kids came up and sat next to us. Their mom said very loudly, "Oh, I bet you can't see because of the tree in the way!" Then she turned to her husband and said, "The kids can't see because these people took our seats!  These people took our seats!"
> 
> She went on and on so that the kids were even embarrassed--"It's OK mom, it's no big deal!"
> 
> I completely ignored her. Of course, we weren't in her seats (there were no reserved seats for the concert and there was nobody in the row saving seats when we sat down  ) but she apparently was trying to guilt us into moving over so her kids could have a better view. (I'm guessing the seats were "theirs" for a previous show).  Yeah, like I should sit in front of a tree because you didn't get there early enough to get a better seat?? Get over yourself!



It is nice when the kids manage to grow up well in spite of a bad example.  I think it's all those wonderful teachers out there.   

On a side note, I am so jealous! I *love* Davy Jones!  I really wanted to go when I heard he's be there, but I just couldn't swing it with work being so busy - otherwise I would have definitely gone!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

PrincessKitty1 said:


> I read a couple of years ago that 50% of visitors to Disney are adults visiting without kids (not that they are necessarily childfree, just that they do not have kids with them).
> 
> I think WDW has become remarkably more adult-oriented in the last 15 years. DH and I went to Epcot about 15 years ago and I remember being stopped by a cast member as we tried to leave the Mexico counter-service area with beers--he politely told us that we could not walk around Epcot with beers in our hand.  Now you can go anywhere with drinks.  There's a lot more adult-oriented entertainment, too.
> 
> I suspect a lot of people with kids at WDW are not having a very good time and are looking at you because they can't imagine why an adult would be there if they didn't have to be.   I know my brother has brought his children to WDW only because he feels obligated, and he and his wife really do not enjoy their time in the Magic Kingdom!



Last summer, BF and I met up with my brother and SIL and 2 nephews in Epcot. My SIL just kept saying how much she wanted to come back without the kids! LOL. All of us, including the kids, did have a fabulous vacation!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

LuluLovesDisney said:


> It is nice when the kids manage to grow up well in spite of a bad example.  I think it's all those wonderful teachers out there.
> 
> On a side note, I am so jealous! I *love* Davy Jones!  I really wanted to go when I heard he's be there, but I just couldn't swing it with work being so busy - otherwise I would have definitely gone!



My husband really, really wanted to see Davy Jones last year, but we didn't get to go, and he was THRILLED to see him this year.  The Monkees were really big when DH and I were in elementary school, and DH knows ALL the songs--I just knew the hits.  Davy put on really fun shows--he is a great entertainer, and varied his sets/patter enough to make each set seem new.  He seemed to really enjoy being up on stage, and we felt priveleged to join in the fun!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> No, not bitter here either. Just fed up like the rest at parents not parenting.
> 
> I am just going to leave a picture and story to go with it. We did the DCL cruise in September 2005 for our 20th anniversary. Our hostess asked at the beginning of the week if we were there for anything special. We told it was for our 20th anniversary but we were a couple of weeks early. She was from Russia and very sweet. We chatted with her all week. By the end of the week she told us we had been her favorites that week. She confided that she was almost done with her time on the ship and she really needed a break. She said it was so nice to do our room as it wasn't a wreck. She said every other cabin she had that week had children and the rooms were a terrible mess. *She asked why don't American people make their children mind???  * We told her she was asking the wrong people as we wondered the same thing.
> 
> Now for the picture. She left this for us to come back to after dinner on the last sea day. For our anniversary and because we were her favorites that week. And not messy. She got a huge tip for that. She even had rose petals trailing from the door all the way in.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> [/



The room looks beautiful-- What a nice anniversary surprise! 

I wonder what she did for the people with the kids


----------



## maddhatir

LuluLovesDisney said:


> It is nice when the kids manage to grow up well in spite of a bad example.  I think it's all those wonderful teachers out there.


----------



## Liisa

I think it is very telling that certain individuals with children have the curiousity to read this thread and, I'm fairly certain, that we aren't over reading the "families with kids" threads (and if we are reading, we are not contributing)...  I think they are jealous of our lifestyle!!!  Troll all you want, you won't change our minds and you certainly won't make us appreciate all of the ill behaved children that are being raised these day.

Now, if you'll excuse me, DH and I are heading out to enjoy a late brunch and a movie... we overslept this morning - we were up late last night planning our vacation trips this year over several glasses of a nice red wine.


----------



## Liisa

One other thought... I had meant to post this a few weeks back... my husband was telling me about an article he read at work (to my memory it was posted in either the Wall Street Journal or the New York Times - I've searched on the internet but haven't been able to locate the article for all of you)...  the article was about "The most privileged generation".  The basic premise of the article was that the latest college graduates have been raised to believe that they are all winners without having to try and that they are "entitled" without having to work.  The author's concern was that all of these kids are now entering the work force to become the problem of the employer.  These young adults in their early twenties have never had to work for success (think of the sports teams where every team gets a trophy because we wouldn't want any child to feel inferior), and they are now entering the workplace on the bottom rung (as most of us did).  The difference - they don't want to work their way up, why should they have to?  

It was a very telling article and gave voice to much of what we have discussed on this thread.  Parenting styles have far reaching consequences.  This isn't just our opinion, this is a real concern for the general population.  And if anyone else can find the article, please feel free to post a link!  DH read it to me over the phone and I believe I hit some of the major points, but it went far more in depth and I think there are several of you who might find it interesting.


----------



## maddhatir

Since I don't have a life ..........
I thought I would Google the phrase- _The most privileged generation_- funny that I found numerous articles on the subject- 

Thought this was interesting......You can just go out and buy the book!

 "The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage Are Creating a Generation of Disconnected and Unhappy Kids" (Harper Collins, $24.95), details an unexpected teenage wasteland of bulging closets and empty lives, where parenting is a competitive sport and appearances aren't just deceiving.

Oh and Liisa, I also slept late- 10:15- and I will be off soon to the nursery-- OMG- NO!- the _"landscaping nursery"_  to go and buy some shady plants for DH's pride and joy- his 30x 40 garage w/ lift  Right now, just relaxing on the internet with a cup of coffee enjoying the the peace and quiet- birds chirping and my music in the background. 

What's that that I DON'T hear???--- kids crying, screaming and bugging me


----------



## Muushka

Ah yes.  Sunday morning, or I should say, Sunday afternoon.
I am still in my PJs, got up after 10.  My cat was a little put out, but eventually we let her in the bedroom.

Yes, life is good.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

I slept in while DH walked the dog...then we headed over to a flea market in a nearby tiny town (good for laughs!) then back to our neighborhood Starbucks for coffee (hot choc. with whipped cream for me!) and pastries. DH is watching The Godfather on DVD and I just finished up the Sunday paper (as always, searching the classified section for a fun job working with animals that pays what I make as a health care professional... ).

It's a GORGEOUS day (sunny and about 80 degrees) and I should be out planting the giant elephant ears and Hawaiian Ti plants we bought last weekend on the way home from WDW...but I guess they will stay in their pots until next weekend (which starts Thursday, since I work three 12 hour shifts).


----------



## Muushka

PrincessKitty1 said:


> I slept in while DH walked the dog...then we headed over to a flea market in a nearby tiny town (good for laughs!) then back to our neighborhood Starbucks for coffee (hot choc. with whipped cream for me!) and pastries. DH is watching The Godfather on DVD and *I just finished up the Sunday paper (as always, searching the classified section for a fun job working with animals that pays what I make as a health care professional... ).*
> 
> It's a GORGEOUS day (sunny and about 80 degrees) and I should be out planting the giant elephant ears and Hawaiian Ti plants we bought last weekend on the way home from WDW...but I guess they will stay in their pots until next weekend (which starts Thursday, since I work three 12 hour shifts).



Oh my, we could be sisters!  Including the health care professional!


----------



## Liisa

Hmmmm... we don't sound very bitter!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Muushka said:


> Oh my, we could be sisters!  Including the health care professional!



Several of the dog-crazy RNs I work with and I decided that when we win lotto  , we'll start a pet rescue group!

(In our down time at work, we browse Petfinder.com.  )


----------



## aclov

Liisa said:


> One other thought... I had meant to post this a few weeks back... my husband was telling me about an article he read at work (to my memory it was posted in either the Wall Street Journal or the New York Times - I've searched on the internet but haven't been able to locate the article for all of you)...  the article was about "The most privileged generation".  The basic premise of the article was that the latest college graduates have been raised to believe that they are all winners without having to try and that they are "entitled" without having to work.  The author's concern was that all of these kids are now entering the work force to become the problem of the employer.  These young adults in their early twenties have never had to work for success (think of the sports teams where every team gets a trophy because we wouldn't want any child to feel inferior), and they are now entering the workplace on the bottom rung (as most of us did).  The difference - they don't want to work their way up, why should they have to?
> 
> It was a very telling article and gave voice to much of what we have discussed on this thread.  Parenting styles have far reaching consequences.  This isn't just our opinion, this is a real concern for the general population.  And if anyone else can find the article, please feel free to post a link!  DH read it to me over the phone and I believe I hit some of the major points, but it went far more in depth and I think there are several of you who might find it interesting.



I have to agree with this as far as recent grad's entering into the workforce and not wanting to start from the bottom.     It definately is a sense of entitlement attitude.   I work in HR and at my last job I did alot of recruitment some of the positions were for engineers and chemist.    It seemed that most recent grads all wanted to be paid big bucks, bonus, have an office, supervisory responsibilities, etc.   Nothing entry-level.  And if they didn't get what they wanted all they did was complain, complain.    My thought was be happy your getting a job and gaining some experience!


----------



## luvthemouse71

Liisa said:


> I think it is very telling that certain individuals with children have the curiousity to read this thread and, I'm fairly certain, that we aren't over reading the "families with kids" threads (and if we are reading, we are not contributing)...  I think they are jealous of our lifestyle!!!  Troll all you want, you won't change our minds and you certainly won't make us appreciate all of the ill behaved children that are being raised these day.
> 
> Now, if you'll excuse me, DH and I are heading out to enjoy a late brunch and a movie... we overslept this morning - we were up late last night planning our vacation trips this year over several glasses of a nice red wine.


Well said, the Parent Nazi's just hate it that everyone doesn't feel the need to spend their lives popping out kids. I mean, just the fact that so many of them have "mommy of" in their names is very telling. I have known women that have basically gotten preggers with a 3rd or 4rth child because they didn't want their husbands to pressure them about getting an outside job. That to me is pathetic and irresponsible. And for the record, I don't hate children-just parents that are miserable with their own decisions and choices, so they decide to take it out on others.


----------



## maddhatir

luvthemouse71 said:


> I mean, just the fact that so many of them have "mommy of" in their names is very telling.



I know some "mommies of" and mom DISers that are cool chicks and not nazi moms. I am sure we all do here on the DIS- 

But it seems like those nazi moms really make my "claws come out"


----------



## Liisa

But my, what lovely claws they are, Maddhatir!  Hehe!  

Speaking of, did anyone else see that Saratoga Springs Spa was very highly rated in Conde Nast (forgive me, I don't have my DVC mag in front of me, so I can't recall how highly it was rated - I want to say in the top five in the country at least - or if it was definitively Conde Nast)?  I haven't tried a Disney Spa yet, but it is quickly moving up my list of things to do!  LOVE the ways that Disney caters to us grown ups... heck, I'm a princess too (actually, I'm the QUEEN, just ask my husband)!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> But my, what lovely claws they are, Maddhatir!  Hehe!









awww- why thanks Lis!


----------



## HockeyKat

Glad everyone had a great weekend!  I spent mine doing absolutely nothing, and it was wonderful.   DH is out of town for work, and I had a great two days of sleeping late and pampering myself... moving from chaise lounge to hot tub and back with a nice book.

I agree on the trolls and the "changing mind" aspect.  I never even played with dolls growing up.  My mom always tried to force them on me, and they creeped me out...  I would turn their creepy eyes to the wall at night.   I can appreciate a cute well-behaved child, but I just never experience that "pang" that says that I would want one.  I am 31, have felt this way all of my adult life, and I just don't see this changing.    I love DH's and I's quiet life.

I guess what I meant to say earlier is not that WDW itself discriminates against CF folk, just that some people with children tend to feel that WDW is "for children" and you should bend over backward to make sure that their child has a great experience, even at the expense of your own good time.   I have no issue with offering a child a better view at a parade or a show.   I do have an issue with the parent expecting the entire party to get in front of me because "they have a child", rather like the Davy Jones story from above.  

It is a matter of respect and consideration.  I just don't think some people think about what they are doing/asking for.   However, not everyone with a child is disrespectful, just as not everyone without one is respectful.  

I don't think this makes me bitter... just expressing my opinion about disrespectful people.


----------



## zima-cheryl

HockeyKat said:


> but I just never experience that "pang" that says that I would want one.



I thought I was the only person who never had the "pang" for kids.  It is nice to know I'm not alone in that aspect.

Honestly, I get more excited when co-workers bring their dogs into the office than when ladies visit w/their new babies.  I just never got all the oohhin & awwing over the infants.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Here's an interesting article on overparenting or as some call them "helicopter parents."  http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/06/25/CMG5EJ6PF71.DTL

Cheers!


----------



## Muushka

I never experienced that pang either.  I always said that my biological clock is broken!  

And I never played with dolls and I never babysat.  Hmmmm, seems like a pattern here.


----------



## maddhatir

Muushka said:


> I never experienced that pang either.  I always said that my biological clock is broken!
> 
> And I never played with dolls and I never babysat.  Hmmmm, seems like a pattern here.



I never babysat either! I never thought of that- actually when I was growing up- Our family never had babies- it was always me and lots of cousins and they were either just a bit younger than me, the same age as me or older- no babies. I grew up in a large italian family. 

In our family (my grandmother had 11 kids) I had 2 uncles and their spouses and 1 aunt and her spouse who never had kids- and one who never even married. I never asked why --I guess I really didn't care Maybe that is why I just grew up thinking it was OK-- b/c our family wasn't really the "judgemental" type! 

We just went with the flow. No pressure.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Muushka said:


> I never experienced that pang either.  I always said that my biological clock is broken!
> 
> And I never played with dolls and I never babysat.  Hmmmm, seems like a pattern here.




The summer betweem 9th and 10th grade, I babysat fulltime for one month for the two-year-old son of a friend of my sister's.  He was a very sweet kid and I spent the whole time playing with him, reading to him, etc.  I remember being so-o-o-o bored!  The parents tried to get me to stay an extra 2 weeks but I couldn't stand another excruciating day of it.  

I did play with dolls but it was all about hairstyles and outfits....I was never interested in babydolls.


----------



## Liisa

PrincessKitty1 said:


> I did play with dolls but it was all about hairstyles and outfits....I was never interested in babydolls.




For me it was all about the love triangle between Sports Barbie, Bathing Barbie and Ken!     In college I was also an avid watcher of Melrose Place and 90210....  Hmmmm, I see a pattern!


----------



## Muushka

Does anyone else, childless, besides me read the column by 
John Rosemond that is in the newspaper every week (well, it is in mine)?

That guy is so right-on about child rearing.  Today's article said:

*"Children need to develop respect for adults....It is impossible for a child to develop respect for adults who act as if he hung the moon".*

I love that man.


----------



## maddhatir

Muushka said:


> Does anyone else, childless, besides me read the column by
> John Rosemond that is in the newspaper every week (well, it is in mine)?
> 
> That guy is so right-on about child rearing.  Today's article said:
> 
> *"Children need to develop respect for adults....It is impossible for a child to develop respect for adults who act as if he hung the moon".*
> 
> I love that man.



I love that quote-- I just may put that in my siggy OMG can you JUST imagine!!!

I find it funny that many people that you do talk to say pretty much the exact thing- kinds now do not have respect for adults- however- the disrespect just continues. 

I am afriad to think of how the next generation will turn out as adults-- and the pattern will just continue


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> I thought I was the only person who never had the "pang" for kids.  It is nice to know I'm not alone in that aspect.
> 
> Honestly, I get more excited when co-workers bring their dogs into the office than when ladies visit w/their new babies.  I just never got all the oohhin & awwing over the infants.



Welcome to the CF thread!!! Who would think on a DIS board you can find us!! 

I agree! I am more excited about animals than kids. That has changed just a LITTLE since I now have little nieces and nephews- but I prefer animals over kids- even though my allergies and asthma won't allow for it--- the animals that is 

Just a few minutes ago I was staring out my window at a squirrel (am I the only that cracks up at these little Ba$&@&ds ) anyway- I have no idea what he was doing- he was rolling around in the grass all crazy- I thought maybe he was dying and then he got up and ran away freak! 

But when I see a kid outside- my mind goes blank and I walk away from the window


----------



## Muushka

> But when I see a kid outside- my mind goes blank and I walk away from the window



Where is the Tag Fairy when you need him/her??? 

You would think that I have not met any wonderful kids in my life.  I once had a roommate in FL that was a single mom in need of a safe place to live (her neighborhood turned into crack-town while she was living there).

Anyway, she had 3 daughters; 9,11 and 13.  They were the best kids and I could not have loved them any more if I had given birth to them.  In the 2 years that they lived with me I never once heard their mother yell at them.  If they did something wrong, she just gave out the punishment.  No yelling, no discussion.  

And these kids respected adults.  I remember times when the youngest was going to be left home by herself I would take her to whatever adult function I was going to and they would all be thrilled that I brought Julie!

My next door neighbor has 3 kids, 3 great kids.  I don't have that much of a relationship with them, but I always enjoy seeing them.  Polite, kind nice kids.

Yeah, I do really love (some) kids!


----------



## maddhatir

Muushka said:


> Where is the Tag Fairy when you need him/her???
> 
> You would think that I have not met any wonderful kids in my life.  I once had a roommate in FL that was a single mom in need of a safe place to live (her neighborhood turned into crack-town while she was living there).
> 
> Anyway, she had 3 daughters; 9,11 and 13.  They were the best kids and I could not have loved them any more if I had given birth to them.  In the 2 years that they lived with me I never once heard their mother yell at them.  If they did something wrong, she just gave out the punishment.  No yelling, no discussion.
> 
> And these kids respected adults.  I remember times when the youngest was going to be left home by herself I would take her to whatever adult function I was going to and they would all be thrilled that I brought Julie!
> 
> My next door neighbor has 3 kids, 3 great kids.  I don't have that much of a relationship with them, but I always enjoy seeing them.  Polite, kind nice kids.
> 
> Yeah, I do really love (some) kids!



I DOUBT the tag fairy comes to this thread! I think the TF is "family friendly"! 

Sure- I know what you mean about some kids- they are like some adults you know- you either like them or you don't - I don't wish to see an adult throwing a tantrum either- but sometimes I just have to deal with it....and not like it


----------



## maddhatir

Those guys with the bald heads are trying to make a "sand sculpture, like at the beach" who are they- I am not sure- they seem to be "from out of town" 

(compliments of: LoveStitch626)
http://news.aol.com/topnews/articles/_a/child-ruins-monks-intricate-sand-design/20070525093809990001

What makes me SICK is that she just left?!.....And never told anyone!?? hmmm- I wonder where the disrespect is learned??


----------



## Liisa

I hope that they find her (I imagine that with the video they will be able to identify the culprit and his mother) and hold her accountable - wouldn't that be considered vandalism or destruction of property.  What a little monster she is raising!!!  

My aunt works as a teachers aid at an elementary school.  Apparently, the school bully (I imagine there is more than one, but this story is only about one of them) had been picking on a very well behaved, soft spoken 6th grader.  After an entire school year of this, the well behaved boy took a pellet gun to the school after hours and nailed the bully with it.  The police and school officials are now questioning the other 6th graders to determine all the details of this incident.  One of the parents (of a 6th grader not directly involved but who would be questioned) contacted the school principal to say that their child would not be questioned without a lawyer present!!!  And then we wonder why kids have no respect for authority!  And I know from stories that my co-workers have told me, schools are not well equipped to deal with "bullies" because the parents all step up and fight that their little "angel" can't possibly be the cause of trouble.  If the parents aren't going to back the school officials, how on earth can the schools be expected to maintain order?  After a year of being picked on and the school not intervening, I can understand why that poor kid flipped out (I'm not condoning, just saying that I understand...)

And then people ask why I don't want kids!  Even if I raise junior to be a respectful, wonderful child, I can't control the environment.  

I   my dogs!!!  No thumbs - no ability to shoot pellet guns!


----------



## Liisa

On a MUCH MUCH more fun topic....  Maddhatir, did you get to see POTC yet?  I'm hoping to get to the theater this weekend.  I thought you might have been there opening night....


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> On a MUCH MUCH more fun topic....  Maddhatir, did you get to see POTC yet?  I'm hoping to get to the theater this weekend.  I thought you might have been there opening night....



Not yet!!!! DH didn't want to go last night- and tonight we are meeting a bunch of friends for drinks- so I already ordered my tix for tomorrow!!! 

I will pass this on as a tid bit of info for those going- BE SURE you stay and watch the clip AFTER all of the credits! I hear it is informative. Way better than the ones after 1 and 2!


----------



## maddhatir

OMG- Time out- I was just responding to a post here and all of a sudden I hear a "commotion" out front on our street and kids laughing!

What do I see?- 3 teenage boys on bikes- kicking the neighbors trash cans as they go by- well, the boys can't see me on my porch and I am watching them approach my house- I hear the one boy say- "do that one" (mine) I stand up and yell (as he is doing it) 

"DON'T EVEN TRY IT A##H*%#!!!!"  

They just looked and took off-- little freaks!


----------



## maddhatir

OK- back to my response......



Liisa said:


> I hope that they find her (I imagine that with the video they will be able to identify the culprit and his mother) and hold her accountable - wouldn't that be considered vandalism or destruction of property.  What a little monster she is raising!!!
> 
> My aunt works as a teachers aid at an elementary school.  Apparently, the school bully (I imagine there is more than one, but this story is only about one of them) had been picking on a very well behaved, soft spoken 6th grader.  After an entire school year of this, the well behaved boy took a pellet gun to the school after hours and nailed the bully with it.  The police and school officials are now questioning the other 6th graders to determine all the details of this incident.  One of the parents (of a 6th grader not directly involved but who would be questioned) contacted the school principal to say that their child would not be questioned without a lawyer present!!!  And then we wonder why kids have no respect for authority!  And I know from stories that my co-workers have told me, schools are not well equipped to deal with "bullies" because the parents all step up and fight that their little "angel" can't possibly be the cause of trouble.  If the parents aren't going to back the school officials, how on earth can the schools be expected to maintain order?  After a year of being picked on and the school not intervening, I can understand why that poor kid flipped out (I'm not condoning, just saying that I understand...)
> 
> And then people ask why I don't want kids!  Even if I raise junior to be a respectful, wonderful child, I can't control the environment.
> 
> I   my dogs!!!  No thumbs - no ability to shoot pellet guns!



O-M-G-- an attorney??! Give me a BREAK! I think the parents of that child should be arrested just for being annoying!


----------



## LauraAnn630

I can see making a choice not to have children.  Thats fine.  Some of the other coments are very disturbing.

I wonder how some of the adults here were raised. It must account for some of the feelings they are having.


----------



## LoveStitch626

LauraAnn630 said:


> I can see making a choice not to have children.  Thats fine.  Some of the other coments are very disturbing.
> 
> I wonder how some of the adults here were raised. It must account for some of the feelings they are having.



You're kidding me right? (I seem to say this a lot here lol)

My parents raised me very strictly and to respect people/their property. Had that kid in the sand been me.. well.. I wouldn't have even considered playing in it. Had I managed.. I would've been in so much trouble. I can't stand parents who DONT discipline their kids, expect everyone to put up with their little dahlins antics with a smile, and don't teach their kids a lick of character. Mom running off when little dahlin played in the sand... no character and that tells the little you know what it's ok to do that. Standing up and saying "my son did this and I'm so sorry" would've taught the little heathen to admit when you've done something bad even if you DO get into trouble over it. 

**back to star wars**


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

Liisa said:


> I hope that they find her (I imagine that with the video they will be able to identify the culprit and his mother) and hold her accountable - wouldn't that be considered vandalism or destruction of property.  What a little monster she is raising!!!
> 
> My aunt works as a teachers aid at an elementary school.  Apparently, the school bully (I imagine there is more than one, but this story is only about one of them) had been picking on a very well behaved, soft spoken 6th grader.  After an entire school year of this, the well behaved boy took a pellet gun to the school after hours and nailed the bully with it.  The police and school officials are now questioning the other 6th graders to determine all the details of this incident.  One of the parents (of a 6th grader not directly involved but who would be questioned) contacted the school principal to say that their child would not be questioned without a lawyer present!!!  And then we wonder why kids have no respect for authority! * And I know from stories that my co-workers have told me, schools are not well equipped to deal with "bullies" because the parents all step up and fight that their little "angel" can't possibly be the cause of trouble.  If the parents aren't going to back the school officials, how on earth can the schools be expected to maintain order? * After a year of being picked on and the school not intervening, I can understand why that poor kid flipped out (I'm not condoning, just saying that I understand...)
> 
> And then people ask why I don't want kids!  Even if I raise junior to be a respectful, wonderful child, I can't control the environment.
> 
> I   my dogs!!!  No thumbs - no ability to shoot pellet guns!



Oh yes. I am a teacher and if I had a dollar for every time I heard a kid brag about cursing out a teacher/administrator/vice principal/principal OR brag about *THEIR PARENT* cursing out a teacher/administrator/vice principal/principal, I would be staying at the Poly for a week. They giggle and brag and think they "won". I hear all the time "I can talk to you any way I want." 

I am a fence sitter on having kids. I am so scared that I could do a great job, but because other parents stink at their job, my kid could still be a disaster. The "cool" parents could offer them drinks, drugs, or bad advice. It is sad, but the parents who love and care are sometimes looked down upon for being "too strict". When I hear kids complaining that their parents are too strict because they require them to get above an 80 in all classes or to be home before 10 or whatever, I tell them that they are LUCKY. 

I love the little ones, but once they are screwed up by their parents, it's like looking at pieces of broken glass - what could have been useful can now only be hurtful. I really love teaching. I am just as much a counselor as I am a teacher, which is draining, but it really shows me how much attention kids *aren't* getting at home. 

I have a wonderful student with a terminal illness whose mother is horrible to him - yells at him to get out of bed, curses at him, leaves him alone for the weekend. It is a wonder he is so nice and sweet. This kid who has truly suffered, is somehow nicer than some of the spoiled kids. It amazes me. 

The worst part about the screwed up kids, the ones that at 12, parents are allowing to drink or smoke pot or go around unsupervised, are the ones that are considered "cool". Well the "coolest" girl in my high school class was recently spotted in the Walgreens, wearing a man's undershirt, dirty short shorts, smelling of cigarettes (as she did in HS) pregnant with a baby on one hip and a five year old behind her, arguing about medicaid paying for prescriptions. I walked by in my pants, heels and sweater set to pick up my prescription completely unrecognized.


----------



## kennancat

Hello all!

Just wanted to pop back in and say hi - I ended up away from the boards for a couple of weeks in March due to getting ready for vacation, work, etc. and realized that life seemed so much brighter when I wasn't spending time on the CB!  Still, I didn't want to completely abandon this thread (wouldn't want anybody thinking I'm picking out strollers), so I've been lurking for a little while. I see we've gotten some new seagulls - fun, fun.

DH found this link on digg today, and I just had to post it for you all. It's from a Fox News piece with two women debating about that new birth control pill that's coming out. Make sure you are sitting down though - the anti-pill woman is a certified whack job! http://thinkprogress.org/2007/05/24/birth-control-unruh/


----------



## Liisa

Unbelievable... that woman is completely missing the boat!!!  Women who "cherish their fertility and rejoice in the ability to have children" wouldn't be on a birth control pill.  Boy is she fighting the wrong battle!  I guess there would be no point in explaining to that woman that if every person living in the US would have kids willy nilly - the economic effect would be catastrophic!  

In some ways, us "child frees" balance out the mix, help keep things in check so to speak.  I feel like Jack Nicholson in A Few Good Men... "they want us on that ledge, they NEED us on that ledge"....


----------



## maddhatir

LauraAnn630 said:


> I can see making a choice not to have children.  Thats fine.  Some of the other coments are very disturbing.
> 
> I wonder how some of the adults here were raised. It must account for some of the feelings they are having.



I am going to EXPLAIN to you WHY I personally feel the way I do and make these comments! Sure it has something to do with how I was raised! I was raised to have RESPECT! And both of my parents are respectful of others. 

And when any of us here see something that is totally mind-boggling we comment on it! Whether it be a comment about a child behaving badly- or an "oblivious" parent, or the "nazi" parent- (who, by the way, usually are the ones raising the children we comment on!) We like to discuss it--

I am sorry, but what we are saying is not disturbing-- it is the truth! And not only that- our comments are usually what most people are saying under their breath in public!

Just a dose of reality for you! Although it seems some may not want to hear it


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> I am going to EXPLAIN to you WHY I personally feel the way I do and make these comments! Sure it has something to do with how I was raised! I was raised to have RESPECT! And both of my parents are respectful of others.
> 
> And when any of us here see something that is totally mind-boggling we comment on it! Whether it be a comment about a child behaving badly- or an "oblivious" parent, ot the "nazi" parent- (who, by the way, usually are the ones raising the children we comment on!) We like to discuss it--
> 
> I am sorry, but what we are saying is not disturbing-- it is the truth! And not only that- our comments are usually what most people are saying under their breath in public!
> 
> Just a dose of reality for you! Although it seems some may not want to hear it



Well said!!! If it is disturbing to be tired of parents that don't parent, so be it. We are all not normal according to some of society anyway. Personally I like marching to the beat of my own drummer.


----------



## maddhatir

I was just checking for the phone# of the theater I am seeing Piartes 3 in tonight and I came across these reviews of the theater- mind you, I choose this theater b/c there are not a lot of kids usually.......


_This is hands down the best Cinema in ***** and better than any Cinema in Philadelphia. Everyone knows it is an adult-preferred cinema and not to bring your kids as they wont be let in unaccompanied (dont have birthday parties here  you will ruin it for everyone else!). It is a haven from the hooligan teenagers that often ruin a great movie experience. Customer Service is impeccable, it is clean, there is a hot beverage bar including coffee, tea, hot chocolate, sandwiches and pastries. Skip the mall, leave the kids at home and have a nice evening out. There are also some good restaurants nearby. Obviously the family above had not done their research and have since affected the overall rating for this cinema. Its a 10! 

Pros: NO KIDS, Clean, Friendly 
Cons: none _

##############

_Love the coffe bar and fresh popcorn. Love that no kids are allowed and crowd noise not tolerated! Hard to find independant movies are great to enjoy here. Only stadium seating and THX sound could improve this place, but I can live without both. 

Pros: No kids, Great Concession, Good value_

##############


AND OMG- READ HOW THEY TREAT YOU WHEN YOU *HAVE* KIDS WITH YOU!

_On the occasion of my daughter's 14th birthday, 11 of her girl friends were invited to see "Lake House" at the ****. When my wife purchased tickets for 12 girls, the ticket agent told her that the children must be accompanied by an adult, so my wife purchased an additional ticket for herself. After we gave our tickets to the ticket-taker, the manager told my wife that two more adults must accompany the group. He said there must be one adult for every 5 children. No such rule is posted on the Ritz Sixteen web site or in the theater lobby. When my wife explained that this rule was not explained when she purchased the 12 tickets, the manager said: "She doesn't know anything; I'm the manager". My wife tried to reason with him because their tickets had already been taken and the movie was about to begin, but the manager insisted that they would not be permitted to see the movie without two more adults. By this time, my daughter's birthday party was on the verge of being ruined so my wife called me and another parent and said that we must come right away to satlisfy the rule of one parent for every 5 children. My wife sat in the back of the theater to save a seat for me, but before I arrived, the manager went into the theater and told her that she must sit in front with the children, not in the back. The 12 children were all 14-years-old and perfectly well-behaved. By this time, it was apparent that the issue went beyond enforcement of the rule to simple harassment. When I finally arrived 15 minutes later, the theater was full and I had to stand in the back, which I did. Any reasonable theater manager would have admitted that it wasn't our fault that we didn't know the rule and would simply have told us to follow the rule in the future. But this manager was obviously enjoying his power to enforce the rule regardless of the consequences. At no time did he apologize for what happened to us._


Hmmmmm- lots of people like US out there!


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

maddhatir said:


> I was just checking for the phone# of the theater I am seeing Piartes 3 in tonight and I came across these reviews of the theater- mind you, I choose this theater b/c there are not a lot of kids usually.......
> 
> 
> _This is hands down the best Cinema in ***** and better than any Cinema in Philadelphia. Everyone knows it is an adult-preferred cinema and not to bring your kids as they wont be let in unaccompanied (dont have birthday parties here  you will ruin it for everyone else!). It is a haven from the hooligan teenagers that often ruin a great movie experience. Customer Service is impeccable, it is clean, there is a hot beverage bar including coffee, tea, hot chocolate, sandwiches and pastries. Skip the mall, leave the kids at home and have a nice evening out. There are also some good restaurants nearby. Obviously the family above had not done their research and have since affected the overall rating for this cinema. Its a 10!
> 
> Pros: NO KIDS, Clean, Friendly
> Cons: none _
> 
> ##############
> 
> _Love the coffe bar and fresh popcorn. Love that no kids are allowed and crowd noise not tolerated! Hard to find independant movies are great to enjoy here. Only stadium seating and THX sound could improve this place, but I can live without both.
> 
> Pros: No kids, Great Concession, Good value_
> 
> ##############
> 
> 
> AND OMG- READ HOW THEY TREAT YOU WHEN YOU *HAVE* KIDS WITH YOU!
> 
> _On the occasion of my daughter's 14th birthday, 11 of her girl friends were invited to see "Lake House" at the ****. When my wife purchased tickets for 12 girls, the ticket agent told her that the children must be accompanied by an adult, so my wife purchased an additional ticket for herself. After we gave our tickets to the ticket-taker, the manager told my wife that two more adults must accompany the group. He said there must be one adult for every 5 children. No such rule is posted on the Ritz Sixteen web site or in the theater lobby. When my wife explained that this rule was not explained when she purchased the 12 tickets, the manager said: "She doesn't know anything; I'm the manager". My wife tried to reason with him because their tickets had already been taken and the movie was about to begin, but the manager insisted that they would not be permitted to see the movie without two more adults. By this time, my daughter's birthday party was on the verge of being ruined so my wife called me and another parent and said that we must come right away to satlisfy the rule of one parent for every 5 children. My wife sat in the back of the theater to save a seat for me, but before I arrived, the manager went into the theater and told her that she must sit in front with the children, not in the back. The 12 children were all 14-years-old and perfectly well-behaved. By this time, it was apparent that the issue went beyond enforcement of the rule to simple harassment. When I finally arrived 15 minutes later, the theater was full and I had to stand in the back, which I did. Any reasonable theater manager would have admitted that it wasn't our fault that we didn't know the rule and would simply have told us to follow the rule in the future. But this manager was obviously enjoying his power to enforce the rule regardless of the consequences. At no time did he apologize for what happened to us._
> 
> 
> Hmmmmm- lots of people like US out there!



Okay, I *love* that this reviewer views having to sit with the children you are supervising "harassment".


----------



## Liisa

I would LOVE a theater like that by me.  Teenagers are the worst at the movies (I don't think this is a reflection on kids today either - I think teenagers in groups at a movie have always been inconsiderate... I'm pretty sure I talked during movies when I was a teen... and I was raised to know better!)


----------



## Liisa

For the people out there who read this thread and find it harsh... I would love for you to do a general search on the internet for child free websites that have discussion forums.  I enjoy posting here because I believe that it is very mild mannered and the complaints are legitimate without much venom.  I was a non-contributing member to an official child free discussion board that was horrible (and to which I am no longer a member)...  The insulting terms that they used for mothers and their offspring were completely uncalled for.  Those child free people didn't just not want children, they were unbelievably bitter in their viewpoint of pregnant women, mothers and children.   This board has been very specific in its dislike of DISREPECTFUL children and parents and ill-behaved children.  Show us a good, well-mannered, kind child and we will applaud the parents that raised him or her.

Please - go read the "real" child free websites out there, and then criticize this group.  At least then you will have a point of reference.

Now... I must start planning my December to trip to WDW - DH and I are taking our 5 yr old nephew and I can't wait to share Disney with him (hmmm... that doesn't sound like the voice of a child hater....)


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

Liisa said:


> For the people out there who read this thread and find it harsh... I would love for you to do a general search on the internet for child free websites that have discussion forums.  I enjoy posting here because I believe that it is very mild mannered and the complaints are legitimate without much venom.  I was a non-contributing member to an official child free discussion board that was horrible (and to which I am no longer a member)...  The insulting terms that they used for mothers and their offspring were completely uncalled for.  Those child free people didn't just not want children, they were unbelievably bitter in their viewpoint of pregnant women, mothers and children.   This board has been very specific in its dislike of DISREPECTFUL children and parents and ill-behaved children.  Show us a good, well-mannered, kind child and we will applaud the parents that raised him or her.
> 
> Please - go read the "real" child free websites out there, and then criticize this group.  At least then you will have a point of reference.
> 
> Now... I must start planning my December to trip to WDW - DH and I are taking our 5 yr old nephew and I can't wait to share Disney with him (hmmm... that doesn't sound like the voice of a child hater....)



Yes, I read one that just made me sick - people were talking about getting brochures for child size coffins and distributing them to children that were badly behaved. I've never heard anyone on this thread even come close to the attitudes that are expressed on other boards. I don't think everyone's meant to have kids - some can be awesome aunts and uncles, but I don't know how anyone could really, genuinely hate kids. I like posting here because no one here is like that.


----------



## Hixski

Isn't it interesting that people swoop in and make their comments but never come back to check what has been said. Are they afraid to debate that parents should parent and alot of kids are out of control today?

Changing the subject, we have a great childfree weekend going on.

Tonight: Grilling steaks and such with a couple nice bottles of wine.
Sunday: Playing golf and then having a few drinks with our golf foursome.
Monday: St. Louis is playing host to Rib America. This is a 4 day event with alot of rib chefs, music and such. Bands include Pat Benatar, Dennis DeYoung from Stix, Molly Hatchet, Blue Oyster Cult and more. Great 70's,80's music. I guess we will eat ribs, drink some beer and listen to music. Better yet it is free admission if you get there before 3PM. I guess I better put this guy in as we are sounding like a couple of boozers. 

Everyone have a nice Memorial Day weekend!!!!!


----------



## Liisa

Hixski,

Your weekend sounds great!  DH and I are catching up on yardwork.  We spent the whole day at garden centers and my better half is out there planting stuff right now.  I'm supposed to be doing housework and helping him place the plants.  I am definitely NOT supposed to be on the DIS boards...Shhh don't tell!   

Have a few drinks for me!


----------



## writersblock42

I totally respect a person's decision not to have kids not only that I totally understand the reasons behind it. I have one child and people sometimes ask me if I plan on having more. Yes, I would like to have one more....but that just isn't working and I am ok with that but what I am not ok with is discussing my fertility with every person who thinks it's their business to ask me why don't we have more children. I also respect a person's choice to attend childfree events. 
On the other hand, if a person does go to a child friendly place, I think that they should expect crying, kids running around, squealing, shouting and loud talking. I also have heard the quote, "I was a really great parent until I had kids." Neither of my sisters have kids and love to judge some of my childrearing practices. I can't wait until they have kids (if they do-one is older and one is younger) so I can sit back and watch how they handle the first temper tantrum. So enjoy your childfree events, be annoyed when a person brings a crying baby into a movie theater, graduation, a play...whatever it may be, but judge lightly.


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> For the people out there who read this thread and find it harsh... I would love for you to do a general search on the internet for child free websites that have discussion forums.  I enjoy posting here because I believe that it is very mild mannered and the complaints are legitimate without much venom.  I was a non-contributing member to an official child free discussion board that was horrible (and to which I am no longer a member)...  The insulting terms that they used for mothers and their offspring were completely uncalled for.  Those child free people didn't just not want children, they were unbelievably bitter in their viewpoint of pregnant women, mothers and children.   This board has been very specific in its dislike of DISREPECTFUL children and parents and ill-behaved children.  Show us a good, well-mannered, kind child and we will applaud the parents that raised him or her.
> 
> Please - go read the "real" child free websites out there, and then criticize this group.  At least then you will have a point of reference.
> 
> Now... I must start planning my December to trip to WDW - DH and I are taking our 5 yr old nephew and I can't wait to share Disney with him (hmmm... that doesn't sound like the voice of a child hater....)



That would be a great disclaimer for page one of this thread!


----------



## maddhatir

LuluLovesDisney said:


> Yes, I read one that just made me sick - people were talking about getting brochures for child size coffins and distributing them to children that were badly behaved.


----------



## KM2004

I just found this thread and I am also happily child free!!!!  I am mostly a "lurker" on these boards, but I feel inspired to share my happiness as a person who is married and child free with her spouse.  
I am so sick of family members and others asking when we plan to have kids.  I am still at a point where I feel guilty telling them that I don't plan to have kids.  Does anyone have any advice for me?
Thanks!!!!


----------



## Liisa

KM2004,

Welcome aboard!!!  

My family has known for 3 or 4 years now about our decision and _for the most part_ they let it rest.  Every once and a while, my mother makes a comment that she hopes I don't regret it one day.  And she occassionally will mention something along the lines of "who will care for you when you are older".  Fortunately for my argument, I have certain family members (cousins and the like) who are so self centered that I know they won't be caring for their families.  I simply point that fact out.  I do know one thing for sure, having kids is no guarantee of security in old age.  I don't blame my mom, she will make a great grandmother to my brother's kids some day and I'm sure she would have loved grandkids from me.  

Hang in there.  They do eventually accept that your decision is final.  I also still have a pang of guilt when talking to my family about it, so I don't bring it up often and I try not to make a big deal about it.  On the bright side, because we don't have children, we take my parents on nice dinners and they often travel with us on vacation.  I love spending time with them.  I don't believe I would be able to if I had the responsibility of a child.

Liisa


----------



## LauraAnn630

Its easy to sit back and tell people how to do a job you have never done.

Some of the coments you have made are DISRESPECTFUL. 

I am not saying people shouldnt be more strict with their children.

Children are not born knowing how to act right.  They have to be taught over and over.

If you see a child not behaving it doesn't make them a bad person.  It only make the parent bad if they are not doing anything about it.

If you see a well behaved child, give them 20 minutes they will do something bad.  Because they are children. 

Parents needing a break doesnt make them bad.

Most people do not work 7 days a week.  Every week!  We all need breaks and thats ok.

I think a lot of people agree kids are out of control.  

I was refering mostly to the squirl verses human being coment.  It seems cold. One of those kids might be taking care of you in your old age.
You better be nice to them.  LOL

Disney should have adults only restaurants, pools and activities besides the culbs.

Some of you do seem bitter.


----------



## PamNC

I can certainly relate to this problem.  We've been married 13 years.  Don't have kids, don't want kids, never have, never will.  We are happy and fulfilled just fine without them.  I have to answer the same questions over and over and sometimes the responses are borderline rude, if not full-blown rude.  I can remember one person I use to work with better than any others.  She and I ended up in the elevator together.  She said, Pam you've been married 3 years.  Aren't you going to have kids?"  I just love how that's an appropriate thing to ask someone.  I said very politely, "no, we don't plan on having any kids."  She looked at me like I was some sort of martian and said, "I don't understand people like you."  I thought about ripping her a new one and giving her a piece of my mind but I opted to say, "I'm perfectly happy and like my life the way it is."   She was totally off base.   

I think it's wonderful that people feel the need to pro-create but I don't.  I love other people's kids and I love spending time with kids, but I love giving them back.  

One can be fulfilled without it.  My husband travels a lot and if we had kids, it would be as if I were a single parent a lot of the time.  We have horses and live on a farm and I don't need anything else on my plate and I don't intend on giving up my time with my horses which I would have to do if I had kids.  I also like being childless because let's face it - YOU HAVE MORE DISPOSABLE INCOME.  Disney, for example.  If we had kids, we couldn't go 2 times a year and stay at Deluxe resorts.  Or, travel at the drop of a hat.  Or blow all our money on ourselves. 

I applaud parents and think it's a very important job and thank God people want kids.  But there is nothing wrong with not wanting them.  

PamNC


----------



## PamNC

I just posted but I forgot something.  

We're not really childless - I have 20 children - all furbabies, and 3 feather-babies.  4 horses, 2 dogs, 4 inside cats, 7 outside cats, 3 chickens.  

so, you see, I have children.   

PamNC


----------



## Liisa

LauraAnn630 said:


> I was refering mostly to the squirl verses human being coment.  It seems cold. One of those kids might be taking care of you in your old age.
> You better be nice to them.  LOL





I think you missed the point of that particular post.  The point was to prove that not all people have maternal feelings about kids.  Case in point, someone hands me their baby... most women oooohhhh and aaahhhhh.... I hold the baby and wonder how long is appropriate before I can give it back.  I have nothing against babies.  Heck, I even find them funny at times.  But I don't get all weak in the knees.  Hand me a puppy, I'm enthralled for hours!   It isn't cold to admit that this is the way we feel.    

And if the hoodlums that were knocking over trash cans in Maddhatir's neighborhood are the ones taking care of me in my old age, I'm in trouble!!!  

And I reiterate AGAIN... we are mostly irritated by those ill mannered children whose parents (1) don't discipline and (2) believe their child can do no wrong.  It is a well documented fact (just turn on your TV or grab a newspaper) that children today are out of control compared to even 20 years ago.  Just ask the school teachers!  And then ask them what they have to say about parents these days...but you may want to pull up a chair and grab some snacks first... I think you'll be there a while.


----------



## Liisa

PamNC said:


> I just posted but I forgot something.
> 
> We're not really childless - I have 20 children - all furbabies, and 3 feather-babies.  4 horses, 2 dogs, 4 inside cats, 7 outside cats, 3 chickens.
> 
> so, you see, I have children.
> 
> PamNC




WOW!!!!  Now that's alot of animals!!!!  I've got my hands full with 2 dogs and a cat!


----------



## maddhatir

LauraAnn630 said:


> I was refering mostly to the squirl verses human being coment.  It seems cold. One of those kids might be taking care of you in your old age.
> You better be nice to them.  LOL



First off- WELCOME KM2004 AND PAMNC 

and 2nd- that was ME making reference to the squirrel- I like animals- sorry- I don't find children as fascination that just me and it's not cold. Funny you can call me cold for THAT- however, I am a vegetarian b/c I can't stand to see any animal suffer so that I can eat-- go figure 

and as far as the neighbor's kids taking care of me when I am old-- I SERIOUSLY DOUBT IT!!! I am certainly NOT talking about my nieces and nephews- heck- I treat them like "they hung the moon" 

And once again- to clear things up- I am not a child hater- I have nieces and nephews that I love dearly- I am nice to other people's children- heck, believe it or not- I even talk to them. I don't mind at all.

But if they annoy me- I choose to walk away and have no interaction with them at all. And we all understand that kids "have their moments" but guess what- we made a decision not to have that in our lives- so you have to understand- we do not wish to deal with it. 

I also understand that a parent can't control their child 24/7, kids are kids- BUT you can see when a parent has totally given up. I see people I know, not friends, just friends of friends who just totally ignore their kids and their actions- and if I see that going on every time I see that person- guess what? I can bet they do it all the time- hence- no discipline.

I give up- only we can understand what we are feeling- I don't know why I keep repeating myself or why I need to justify my feelings to those who don't get it


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> I think you missed the point of that particular post.  The point was to prove that not all people have maternal feelings about kids.  Case in point, someone hands me their baby... most women oooohhhh and aaahhhhh.... I hold the baby and wonder how long is appropriate before I can give it back.  I have nothing against babies.  Heck, I even find them funny at times.  But I don't get all weak in the knees.  Hand me a puppy, I'm enthralled for hours!   It isn't cold to admit that this is the way we feel.
> 
> And if the hoodlums that were knocking over trash cans in Maddhatir's neighborhood are the ones taking care of me in my old age, I'm in trouble!!!
> 
> And I reiterate AGAIN... we are mostly irritated by those ill mannered children whose parents (1) don't discipline and (2) believe their child can do no wrong.  It is a well documented fact (just turn on your TV or grab a newspaper) that children today are out of control compared to even 20 years ago.  Just ask the school teachers!  And then ask them what they have to say about parents these days...but you may want to pull up a chair and grab some snacks first... I think you'll be there a while.




  OMG Lisa- My reply to the same post sounds almost like yours but I was just a few minutes behind you 

OH and just take a gander at this little news story I found on Magical Mountain!

_On Sunday, 5 youths were arrested at the Walt Disney World Resort for spitting and swearing at patrons. The ages of the youths ranged from 14-20, and they are from the Long Island, New York town of Shirley.

Complaints began by Space Mountain, and security was called. After they were detained, the Orange County Sheriff's department came on to the scene, and a fight erupted from there.

After threats were made by Brian Guifoil towards the deputy, his friends came running over to get involved themselves. They surrounded the deputy and began attacking. "I was punched in the face with closed fists several times by all the defendants," the deputy wrote. "I defended myself by throwing counter punches in their faces and bodies in an attempt to break free." The altercation came to end after a stun gun was used on a 17 year old girl who allegedly punched a security officer.

All 5 were arrested and charges with battery on a law enforcement officer and resisting arrest. The 17 year old girl was charged with battery on a uniformed officer also. Brian Guifoil and Rose DiPietro were both released on $2,300.00 bond. It is not known if the 3 other underage suspects were still in custody.

"Behavior like this is not tolerated at the Walt Disney World resort," Disney spokeswoman Zoraya Suarez said. "That's why we rely on the Orange County Sheriff's Office to assist us in situations like these." _


----------



## Muushka

KM2004 said:


> I just found this thread and I am also happily child free!!!!  I am mostly a "lurker" on these boards, but I feel inspired to share my happiness as a person who is married and child free with her spouse.
> I am so sick of family members and others asking when we plan to have kids.  I am still at a point where I feel guilty telling them that I don't plan to have kids.  Does anyone have any advice for me?
> Thanks!!!!



*Stand firm and don't squirm!!!*

I started the "I am not having children battle" in 1976!
I am still glad that I made the decision to not have children and I cannot tell you how many people with children that agreed with my decision.  Hang in there!



> I give up- only we can understand what we are feeling- I don't know why I keep repeating myself or why I need to justify my feelings to those who don't get it



Don't worry, most of us on this thread get it!


----------



## tink_about_it

We have 4 daughters and wanted children from an early age. I always wanted to be a mom. With that being said, I would never ask someone or think anything about it if they do not have children! There are all kinds of factors involved...choice, infertility,etc. Believe me, having 4 children is an everyday full-time job. I joke that my teaching job is my break away from the hard job...but it's true! There are times that I get frustrated...I don't get away very much. I do not think it's selfish for people to not have children. I do get frustrated with people who look at me like I'm crazy or make comments like "Geesh...heard of birthcontrol?"  It's the same thing, just the opposite. It was my choice and none of their business. My sister, a hair-dresser, has struggled with infertlity for years. You wouldn't believe the comments she hears at work. I say good for you for making a decision that is right for you. No one deserves an explanation. I like the Dear Abby comment of "Wow, that's a personal question. Why do you ask?" I would be floored if someone said that to me...It would definitley put them into place!


----------



## LoveStitch626

Hixski said:


> Isn't it interesting that people swoop in and make their comments but never come back to check what has been said. Are they afraid to debate that parents should parent and alot of kids are out of control today?
> 
> Changing the subject, we have a great childfree weekend going on.
> 
> Tonight: Grilling steaks and such with a couple nice bottles of wine.
> Sunday: Playing golf and then having a few drinks with our golf foursome.
> Monday: St. Louis is playing host to Rib America. This is a 4 day event with alot of rib chefs, music and such. Bands include Pat Benatar, Dennis DeYoung from Stix, Molly Hatchet, Blue Oyster Cult and more. Great 70's,80's music. I guess we will eat ribs, drink some beer and listen to music. Better yet it is free admission if you get there before 3PM. I guess I better put this guy in as we are sounding like a couple of boozers.
> 
> Everyone have a nice Memorial Day weekend!!!!!





That sounds like fun! We've got a pretty mellow weekend planned. Yesterday 2 girlfriends and I went to the fabric store (3 hour trip  ) to get fabric/patterns for our Ren Fest costumes. Hattir, you'd love the wenchy-ness of mine lol. Today we're going to get started cutting the patterns and tomorrow we're going to bbq and probably work on the patterns some more.


----------



## Liisa

I heard about that episode at Disney.  I was shocked.  Why would people like that even want to go to such a happy place?  And to spend the amount of money they spent just to get into the park only to be thrown out...??!!  I would venture to say... those kids don't seem very bright!


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> Hattir, you'd love the wenchy-ness of mine lol. Today we're going to get started cutting the patterns and tomorrow we're going to bbq and probably work on the patterns some more.



MAKE sure you e-mail me some pics!!!!

Funny your (wench outfit) story kind of reminds me of when DH and I went to go see Pirates *2*- DH went to the men's room and I was sitting near a young woman- she was alone. I was admiring her skirt, but didn't say anything- but after DH got up- she said me ME- I love your skirt! I said OMG- I have been thinking the same thing about yours!! We got to talking and I could have been sitting near ....me! We loved each others clothes- Always buy from the clearence rack b/c you find the funkiest stuff- I love to dress in long flowy funky skirts and I have been called a hippie a -NEO- hippie (yes- that was interesting) and a few other hippie kinda-names She dressed the same- anywho- we started talking about music and I told her I was into baroque and I said and I may be the only person in this theater that has a CD of medieval "banquet" music in my car! She said OMG! No you are not- I do too! She said- I go to a class and we do medieval "dance"  she said they dress in period costumes etc--- HOW COOL!!!! hmmmmm- If DH never came back from the men's room HA!! JOKING!! 

That is what your wench dress reminded me of.....that story!

Just enjoying our weekend- woke up around 8:30- me and DH sat on the porch, he read the paper- I surfed the net- we then moved it indoors- he took a nap- I surfed the net- we then decided not to be too lazy today- he went and mowed the lawn, did some yard work- I did more painting in the spare bedroom- did some wash- went out and actully trimmed the grass around my morning glorys and clematis-- WITH THE SCISSORS! DH is afraid to get anywhere near them with the weed wacker 

Now I am sipping some champagne, listening to some Vivaldi- he is washing the lawn mower and who knows whats next!

Pizza sounds like what's next!!! 

No BBQs yet- My SIL asked us over yesterday for a BBQ- but I said no way Jose- I got tix to Pirates 3! Party without me man! Our neighbors just asked us over their house for a BBQ tomorrow- probably won't go- we are doing the corny town parade- we do it every year- it is the dumbest thing- but we meet a bunch of people and hang out-

Still haven't gotten to get a cycle ride in yet! 

The end.......


----------



## kennancat

LauraAnn630 said:


> Some of you do seem bitter.


If you dealt with people who felt the need to question your lifestyle choices as often as childfree adults have to deal with them, I bet you'd sound bitter too. Case in point - I don't know how you meant that smiley at the end, but it feels condescending. Face it, you're listening in on a conversation that isn't intended for you. If I overheard two women talking (or writing on an Internet thread) about how much they loved being moms and people who didn't have kids didn't know what they were missing and who was going to take care of them when they got old, etc., etc., I might feel annoyed but I think I'd see it for what it was and wouldn't feel the need to go up to those women or post on the thread. Ultimately, we need to be secure in our own life choices and not worry about how other people judge us (because they will!  ). The goal of this thread is to help those who have or are considering this life choice talk about it and have a safe place to discuss their concerns and the issues they face with that choice.


----------



## HockeyKat

writersblock42 said:


> So enjoy your childfree events, be annoyed when a person brings a crying baby into a movie theater, graduation, a play...whatever it may be, but judge lightly.



This is my judgement:
I am not annoyed when a person brings a child into a movie theater, play, graduation, restaurant.  However, assuming it is not a kid-friendly place like McDonald's or a CS restaurant at WDW, ride, outside, etc... it is rude and inconsiderate to not remove the child to a corridor or restroom if it decides to cry or misbehave.   Period.   I wouldn't be allowed to let a barking dog remain in those places, and rightfully so, as it would be bothering others.


----------



## TKDisneylover

kennancat said:


> If you dealt with people who felt the need to question your lifestyle choices as often as childfree adults have to deal with them, I bet you'd sound bitter too. Case in point - I don't know how you meant that smiley at the end, but it feels condescending. Face it, you're listening in on a conversation that isn't intended for you. If I overheard two women talking (or writing on an Internet thread) about how much they loved being moms and people who didn't have kids didn't know what they were missing and who was going to take care of them when they got old, etc., etc., I might feel annoyed but I think I'd see it for what it was and wouldn't feel the need to go up to those women or post on the thread. Ultimately, we need to be secure in our own life choices and not worry about how other people judge us (because they will!  ). The goal of this thread is to help those who have or are considering this life choice talk about it and have a safe place to discuss their concerns and the issues they face with that choice.



Coming out of "lurkerdom", I couldn't have said this better myself.  Great job getting your point across.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> "we started talking about music and I told her I was into baroque and I said and I may be the only person in this theater that has a CD of medieval "banquet" music in my car!
> 
> Now I am sipping some champagne, listening to some Vivaldi- he is washing the lawn mower and who knows whats next!



I know it's been a while since I've posted, but you caught my attention.  I LOVE VIVALDI and Baroque style music!  I don't know anyone my age(40 something) remotely interested, except DH!  I would love to get some medieval banquet music, can you tell me the name of the CD?  And we love going to the renaissance festival they have throughout summer at the Wisconsin/Illinois border.  I just havn't gotten the nerve to get a wench costume yet........ 

And by the way, we grilled steaks on the grill & I was drinking Mimosa's last night while we watched the sun set.  It was a gorgeous evening!

And today we are going to tailgate & watch the Brewer's play at Miller Park.  I can't wait to have a brat!  Happy Memorial Day everyone!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I can't wait to have a brat!  Happy Memorial Day everyone!



OMG! I SWEAR, SWEAR, SWEAR! at first- I was thinking why would she post on here and then tell us she can't wait to have kids!!!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I know it's been a while since I've posted, but you caught my attention.  I LOVE VIVALDI and Baroque style music!  I don't know anyone my age(40 something) remotely interested, except DH!  I would love to get some medieval banquet music, can you tell me the name of the CD?  And we love going to the renaissance festival they have throughout summer at the Wisconsin/Illinois border.  I just havn't gotten the nerve to get a wench costume yet........




Tammy- I just picked up a few from Borders- they are just called _Elizabethan Songs _and the other one is _Music for a  Medievel Banquet_ put out by Classical Express

I have anotehr CD called Nottingham Ale- Tavern Music from Colonial Williamsburg- from the _Willliamsburg Marketplace_ catalog


----------



## tink_about_it

HockeyKat said:


> This is my judgement:
> it is rude and inconsiderate to not remove the child to a corridor or restroom if it decides to cry or misbehave.   Period.   I wouldn't be allowed to let a barking dog remain in those places, and rightfully so, as it would be bothering others.



IT? 

I'm not sure that it is fair to compare a child to a dog.


----------



## maddhatir

tink_about_it said:


> IT?
> 
> I'm not sure that it is fair to compare a child to a dog.




Awwwwwwww KAT!!!!! She beat me to it-- I KNEW this was going to be brought up-- comparing the dog and the kid! 

I couldn't get to you fast enough!


----------



## maddhatir

tink_about_it said:


> IT?
> 
> I'm not sure that it is fair to compare a child to a dog.




and PS- you said IT instead of him or her, he, she, the boy, the girl.........


----------



## HockeyKat

Aww crap, you caught me.  Too much bitterness I guess.   

I do tend to use "it" in reference to  people and animals to which I have no specific gender.   I suppose it may offend some, but oh well, as I was told by a teen who wanted me to stand to let them pass during play in the middle of an NHL hockey game, "You'll be all right."  (yup, bitter!  )

But in all seriousness, you might not consider it fair to compare a child to a dog, but in my opinion, they have equal rights to be loud and unruly in a restaurant, play, etc.  As well as a drunk, loud, or obnoxious adult, actually, who I also think should be removed.  Obviously, my opinion is extremely unpopular!


----------



## aclov

maddhatir said:


> I agree! I am more excited about animals than kids.



My best friend is like this, she actually enjoys animals more than people not just children.   She says it's because animals don't talk back!   She has a teenage son but he was unplanned but decided to raise him and be a mother, but she says if that wouldn't have happened she wouldn't have had children.  She has 6 dogs and 6 cats and was a foster mom and volunteer for shelter dogs.    She feels that's her calling -  to be a voice for animals.   I had a coworker who wasn't married and didn't have children and she was a foster care caseworker, that was her calling.   I'm an animal lover myself and when I run into people who say cruel things about animals, it angers me.    But than I think that their not an animal person and I TRY to respect that.       People don't have the same passion as other people.


----------



## aclov

writersblock42 said:


> I totally respect a person's decision not to have kids not only that I totally understand the reasons behind it. I have one child and people sometimes ask me if I plan on having more.



I really applaud you.   I wish there were more people like you that would just respect a person's decision.  I've struggled with infertility for many years (hopefully -  I can still post here! ) and the questions I get from people sometimes hurt.      One of my good friends has three kids and is a SAHM, she swears it's the best thing in the world.    I think maybe for her it is but it doesn't mean that's for everyone.    She tends to be very narrow minded and one day we were talking about a girl we knew that was dating a mutual guy friend of ours.   It turns out they broke up because she didn't want to have any children and he did, so I respect that at least she was honest in telling him this before that made a huge commitment.  So my friend, the SAHM, is asking me why they broke up and I tell her.    She say's, "What a selfish little B---ch!"   I respond "why because she doesn't want to have any kids and I least she's honest about it".      She pissed me off saying that!   Like I said some people want their life to be cookie cutter for everyone.     Up to this day, she still asks me when I'm going to have kids and after my infertility struggles, she's telling me to adopt.   Um.....it's my life and my decisions.    Honestly, I've had to distant myself from her because I just can't stand that her entire life revolves around her kids.   I love her kids -no flames pleeze, but I can never have a conversation with her without her kids interfering.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> OMG! I SWEAR, SWEAR, SWEAR! at first- I was thinking why would she post on here and then tell us she can't wait to have kids!!!



Oops, I guess I shouldn't have used the shortened midwest term, it was a "bratwurst" with sauerkraut I might add, and it sure was good!!   Unfortunately the Brewers lost, but the 2 other child-free couples I was with, and DH & I had a great time!

And thanks for the info on the CD's!   I wrote down the names and will stop and pick them up next weekend.


----------



## maddhatir

aclov said:


> I love her kids -no flames pleeze



 The CF should not have to utter that phrase on our own thread!!! Take it back! 

I also have a friend EXACTLY as you described. Her life revolves around her kids. So much so that one of our friends was having a b-day. We were thinking about going out to dinner to celebrate.....she wanted to take her kids b/c she said they would love to celebrate with us! It was going to be an adult only dinner and she said the kids would be disappointed if they didn't go! 

How about.......tell them it's adults only, get a babysitter and enjoy the night out...the end!!!?

CF OT But I have to also mention this about her----

She also started crying when I told her that I had no problem whatsover if someone was gay, they are born that way and if they are happy why should I care what they do-- she told me she would pray for me I told her to save her prayers, they won't work on me


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Oops, I guess I shouldn't have used the shortened midwest term, it was a "bratwurst" with sauerkraut I might add, and it sure was good!!   Unfortunately the Brewers lost, but the 2 other child-free couples I was with, and DH & I had a great time!
> 
> And thanks for the info on the CD's!   I wrote down the names and will stop and pick them up next weekend.



Tammy- there are also some internet stations I listen to on my desktop/laptop-

Try this station- just do a search of "baroque" and not only that! They have Disney park music fr when you are feeling homesick for some Disney Magic! There are TONS of stations here Live 365

and another site I go to for some baroque- Otto's


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> She also started crying when I told her that I had no problem whatsover if someone was gay, they are born that way and if they are happy why should I care what they do-- she told me she would pray for me I told her to save her prayers, they won't work on me




Pray for you? Because you are tolerant of other people?  That's just odd!  

Boy, you miss a day... you miss alot!!!

And just for the record... I like my dogs better than kids.  Why else would I have dogs instead of kids?


----------



## Liisa

aclov said:


> She tends to be very narrow minded and one day we were talking about a girl we knew that was dating a mutual guy friend of ours.   It turns out they broke up because she didn't want to have any children and he did, so I respect that at least she was honest in telling him this before that made a huge commitment.  So my friend, the SAHM, is asking me why they broke up and I tell her.    She say's, "What a selfish little B---ch!"   I respond "why because she doesn't want to have any kids and I least she's honest about it".




I agree with you.  She would have been alot more selfish if she felt that way and didn't tell the poor guy until after they were married.  Much more respectable to be honest up front.  

And I am so sorry to hear that you weren't able to have kids.  Whether I want them or not, it breaks my heart to know people that really want a child who aren't able to.  I work with a woman who I think would make a wonderful mother and she and her husband have been trying for a number of years with no luck.   Seems so unfair....


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Tammy- there are also some internet stations I listen to on my desktop/laptop-
> 
> Try this station- just do a search of "baroque" and not only that! They have Disney park music fr when you are feeling homesick for some Disney Magic! There are TONS of stations here Live 365
> 
> and another site I go to for some baroque- Otto's



Thanks for the info on Otto's, I've never come across that site in my internet searches.  However *I do listen to Live365 *everytime I'm on the DIS boards(which is a lot!).  I'm so addicted to that station & the DIS!  I also listen to it at work, thankfully I was able to get around our "entertainment block" so I can listen to it there whenever.  And I love listening to Baroque when I first get into work before all the office hoopla begins!  It helps get my day started off on a positive note.

Thanks again for the great info!


----------



## zima-cheryl

aclov said:


> She say's, "What a selfish little B---ch!"   I respond "why because she doesn't want to have any kids and I least she's honest about it".



I hope it is okay to jump in here, but I would like to add my 2 cents on this too.  I got a call from a good friend of mine who got the "selfish" line the other day from family.  She & her husband are fence sitting right now but leaning pretty far to the CF side of things.  It really made me angry that her family was pushing like that.  I got right on my soap box w/her (in a way you only can do w/a good friend).

Why is it we are "selfish" when we take the time to sit down, really look hard at who we are, where we are and make an informed & well thought out decision that we don't have the emotional, mental &/or physical ability &/or desire to have children and raise them properly?  I would say that is pretty responsible.  

I'll get down off my soap box now.


----------



## aclov

maddhatir said:


> The CF should not have to utter that phrase on our own thread!!! Take it back!
> 
> I also have a friend EXACTLY as you described. Her life revolves around her kids. So much so that one of our friends was having a b-day. We were thinking about going out to dinner to celebrate.....she wanted to take her kids b/c she said they would love to celebrate with us! It was going to be an adult only dinner and she said the kids would be disappointed if they didn't go!
> 
> How about.......tell them it's adults only, get a babysitter and enjoy the night out...the end!!!?
> QUOTE]
> 
> You know it kills me when people with children get offended if you say "it's adults only"   Than they say they can't come because they don't have a sitter and expect you to say it's okay that they can bring the kids.    Just like when at some weddings including my own was "adults only." Why would I want kids running around the dance floor.   I think they feel that if you don't invite their kids than you don't want them.   But it's adult-time!    I also refuse to go out on a girl's dinner when my one friend who brings all or one of her 3 kids.  They are brats!   And I'm a patient person, but when her kids is throwing stuff or under the table, I can't take it.   I want to relax and talk.


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## Hixski

aclov said:


> You know it kills me when people with children get offended if you say "it's adults only"   Than they say they can't come because they don't have a sitter and expect you to say it's okay that they can bring the kids.    Just like when at some weddings including my own was "adults only." Why would I want kids running around the dance floor.   I think they feel that if you don't invite their kids than you don't want them.   But it's adult-time!    I also refuse to go out on a girl's dinner when my one friend who brings all or one of her 3 kids.  They are brats!   And I'm a patient person, but when her kids is throwing stuff or under the table, I can't take it.   I want to relax and talk.



These are the types of parents that want to bring their kids to adults only things but.........if they want a quiet night out without their kids they complain the loudest about OTHER unruly children. Crazy. So let me get this straight. You want to bring your children to anything and everything whether it is adults only or not. You also want to have a quiet night out sometime with your DH and not have it interrupted by crying, throwing, and running around children. How exactly does this work because I would really like that.


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## maddhatir

aclov said:


> I also refuse to go out on a girl's dinner when my one friend who brings all or one of her 3 kids.  They are brats!   And I'm a patient person, but when her kids is throwing stuff or under the table, I can't take it.   I want to relax and talk.



ooooh! Don't you love going out to a meal and the person's kid at the table is the "main attraction" and no one can have a conversation! Everytime you start to utter a word junior is doing something that needs to be addressed- and you have to stop mid-sentence and smile and pretend that it doesn't bug you! "noooo- go ahead you better get him off of the chandelier, we can talk later" * big smile*


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## aclov

My mom is now having the problem that her friend's bring their grandkids along.    Her best friend invited her out to a bday dinner and she decides to bring her two grand-daughters.     You can't have an adult conversation with kids around!    My mom now dreads having her over or going out with her friend, whom she doesn't see that often because she drags the grand-daughters with her all the time.   She has another friend that does this too.


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## aclov

maddhatir said:


> The CF should not have to utter that phrase on our own thread!!! Take it back!QUOTE]
> 
> Oops....wrong board!   I take it back!   What was I thinking


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## maddhatir

A few days ago I posted some comments people had made about the theater I was going to see Pirates 3 in-- everyone love(d) this theater b/c they would play mostly Indie films and their policy about letting kids in was great- they didn't want them. 

WELL! The theater sold to a "chain" company and their "no kids" policy is now gone. I was reading an article in a local mag about the "death"of the theater and OMG- some of the things the writer of the article says is hilariuos-- or should I say "right on the money"!

Full article if you are interested

The funniest quote I think is:
No, Billy Boy, its not. Its your role to honor the refined tradition of the Ritzs original intentions. *Instead, you are letting down an entire (paying) population of theatre-goers who would rather eat their own eyeballs than sit through a film with cackling, rambunctious teens* sitting behind them, munching on Sour-Patch Kids and Butterfingers like horses, all the while answering cell phone calls that ring whenever an important plot point is about to unfold


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## kennancat

I just found these on "retorts" from the following childfree page: http://www.geocities.com/lovelinus1/retorts.html



> You sound like a sad and bitter person!
> 
> --Hey, you're the one criticizing other people's life choices!
> 
> --I'll take sad and bitter if it means sleeping in on the weekends and having some peace and quiet at home! Sign me up!
> 
> --So what's your point?
> 
> --If you were so happy with your choices, you wouldn't be trying to make me feel bad by telling me I'm sad and bitter.
> 
> --If I am, at least I'm not passing my anger and bitterness on to the next generation like you are!



Looking over this site, I'm thinking we divide up the typical comments/troll remarks we get here and put one person in charge of responding to each type! Much more efficient that way


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## Hixski

I liked the Ten Commandments.....this is so true in DH and my situation. Here are some things we have to deal with because we are childfree.

I worked over 420 hours of overtime last year. Did the same amount of OT the year before. I have never left work early in at least the last 3 or 4 years. I have not called in sick in the last 4 or 5 years. Don't even get me started about how much time some people take off. 

DH insurance has a family plan. If spouse works they must get their own insurance from their work (common I know) then DH insurance will be secondary. The kicker though is this....DH insurance is great. They have no weekly or monthly co-pay just the co-pay you do when you go to the doctors. The problem is he has a family plan but I pay 32.00 a week to have mine and then his is secondary. He knows alot of people he works with that have the DH and a SAHM and 3 or 4 kids. His insurance pays for everyone with nothing prorated or anything. They complain about how much health care costs are but are doing it to themselves. DH and I pay $128.00 a month  on his "family plan" because I work. The family of 6 pay nothing a month because the SAHM does not work. I think this is just crazy. 

Rant over now to the following:     


Ten Commandments of Workplace Etiquette in Family-Friendly America

1. Thou shalt volunteer to work late so that mothers can leave at 2:00 P.M. to watch their sons play soccer, for a mother's time is more valuable than thine.

2.  Thou shalt never complain when important meetings are broken up at 2:30 by phone calls from children reporting in after school lest thou be considered indifferent to the importance of parental bonding.

3. Thou shalt take thy vacations when no one else wants time off so parents can take theirs during summer, over Christmas, or on any other school or "family" holiday.

4.  Thou shalt not apply the phrase "equal pay for equal work" to thy company's benefits plan, althought it offers mothers and fathers thousands of dollars in perks thou can't use.

5.  Thou shalt willingly do two jobs for the price of one while mothers are on six-month maternity and paternity leaves.

6.  Thou shalt never ask for a long leave to write a book, travel, or fulfill thy heart's desire because no desire other than children could possibly be worth thy company's inconvenience.

7.  Thou shalt volunteer to take frequent business trips to places like Abilene, Kansas, or Cleveland, Ohio, so that parents can spend their evenings watching ER after they put the kids to bed.  

8.  Thou shalt promote thy "family-friendly" company as a firm that cherishes women because everyone knows that women equals mothers.

9.  Thou shalt never utter the words " but that's not my problem" when a parent rushes out the door during the final negotiations of a corporate merger, explaining that he has promised to take the children to the movies.

10. Thou shalt smile graciously when thy coworker brings her three-year-old to the office and allows him to turn the papers on thy desk into airplanes.


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## HockeyKat

Hahahah!!

I am actually rather lucky in this regard, as I chose a technical profession with almost no women in my department, at this job or any of the 8 I have had in the past 10 years (yeah, not exactly a STABLE profession!).  Most of the men are from other countries and/or have SAHM as wives.   

My boss does have kids but they are teenagers, and he is a workaholic anyhow, so the thought of leaving at 2PM is NOT acceptable in my department.   I have actually never worked in a place where they put any emphasis on family time... I guess when you get into tech you know that the hours can be long/wonky.  

Both my job and my husband's job penalize families way more than singles for health care.  Employee only for me is free, and for him is $80/month... Family for my company is $200+, and same for him.

I do offer to take weekend time and holidays, since my DH is in retail and we can never take traditional vacations.   Summer, Christmas, spring break is the LAST time I would want to take vacation anyhow... too many kids, too many people.  I don't really like family holidays anymore... we wind up relegated to the kids table w/ siblings, cousins, and their babies, talking about diaper wipes and potty training.

Maybe I *am* bitter.  

Oh BTW... I am looking for a new, more permanent form of birth control.  I am currently on Yasmin and have no problems with it, but I would like something I didn't have to refill often and take daily.  My insurance covers birth control other than the pill 100%.  Any suggestions?   I would love to have my tubes tied but at 31, healthy, married, no doctor would do it.


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## maddhatir

HockeyKat said:


> Hahahah!!
> 
> Oh BTW... I am looking for a new, more permanent form of birth control.  I am currently on Yasmin and have no problems with it, but I would like something I didn't have to refill often and take daily.  My insurance covers birth control other than the pill 100%.  Any suggestions?   I would love to have my tubes tied but at 31, healthy, married, no doctor would do it.



Snip-snip for DH!!!!! Faster recovery time than you having your tubes tied!!! Fast and easy!  
ETA- and I believe a urologist would not have the same "issues" when it came to a guy- than a GYN would have for a woman-- Why doesn't everyone stop telling us we should do with our bodies!  

As far as your tubes being tied- It should not be anyone's (doctor) business as to WHY you want it done- Have you asked your gyno about it??? Hopefully your GYN is not a "OB"GYN- I think they tend to be a bit more "family minded"


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## Hixski

I am in the the IT tech field. They are family friendly to the men too. So the men are always leaving too at my work. Someone actually had the nerve to tell me since my husband works the opposite shift and I don't see him anyway it shouldn't matter. HELLO if I could take some time off I COULD actually see him. I give up. They are just as bad to another woman I work with because her children are grown. No need to leave anymore when your kids are out of the house.  If I have a chip on my shoulder it is about these types of policies. I am looking for a new job. Hopefully one that is family friendly to EVERYONE.


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## LoveStitch626

Hixski said:


> I am in the the IT tech field. They are family friendly to the men too. So the men are always leaving too at my work. Someone actually had the nerve to tell me since my husband works the opposite shift and I don't see him anyway it shouldn't matter. HELLO if I could take some time off I COULD actually see him. I give up. They are just as bad to another woman I work with because her children are grown. No need to leave anymore when your kids are out of the house.  If I have a chip on my shoulder it is about these types of policies. I am looking for a new job. Hopefully one that is family friendly to EVERYONE.



That really stinks. It seems if you don't have a screaming brat on your hip and another on the ****, you're not a family.  I also hate how the guys that DH works with usually have the better shifts..early shift getting out early.. more weekends off.. cuz ya know.. wives don't count as family and we should be able to suck it up since we don't have kids.


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## ChisJo

wow - it's been awhile since I'v posted on here, and has this thread ever gotten long!!

Thought you would all be interested in the following article....

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,274726,00.html

This article ANGERED me....I know it's her choice, but really, who is going to be raising her kids? It's not fair to those kids at all....What's it going to be like when they graduate from HIGH SCHOOL??? Seriously, just because you CAN have kids doesn't mean you SHOULD have kids...


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## aclov

ChisJo said:


> wow - it's been awhile since I'v posted on here, and has this thread ever gotten long!!
> 
> Thought you would all be interested in the following article....
> 
> http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,274726,00.html
> 
> This article ANGERED me....I know it's her choice, but really, who is going to be raising her kids? It's not fair to those kids at all....What's it going to be like when they graduate from HIGH SCHOOL??? Seriously, just because you CAN have kids doesn't mean you SHOULD have kids...



What really angers me is when girls don't take care of themselves and are popping kids all over the place.     One lady at work is raising her grandson because her teenage daughter took off, the father is unknown and than came back pg again!   I'm just thinking -  get that girl fixed!      Today on my way to the mall I see a young girl walking on the highway pregnant as can be and smoking.


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## ChisJo

aclov said:


> What really angers me is when girls don't take care of themselves and are popping kids all over the place.     One lady at work is raising her grandson because her teenage daughter took off, the father is unknown and than came back pg again!   I'm just thinking -  get that girl fixed!      Today on my way to the mall I see a young girl walking on the highway pregnant as can be and smoking.



I used to be a waitress in a bar, and you would be surprised at the amount of pregnant younger girls and women (both professional and otherwise) and they ordered a drink..."only one - won't hurt the baby". Well, is that one for the night, or one for the hour? What about all the OTHER "one" times you've drank. After awhile, I refused to serve them alcohol. OR - I would be tricky and get the bartender to make them virgin for me (I also did that with people who were beligerent and drunk and wanted more to drink - by that point, they have NO idea they are drinking non-alcoholic beer!!).

Anyways, back to the point, it should be ILLEGAL for a bar or restaurant to serve alcohol to a pregnant person....truly - I couldn't give a crap about the woman who is pregnant - I'm caring for the child that is in her tummy. I work in a pediatric hospital, and trust me when I say, I have had enough of the FAS kids, and the other kids who come in who's parents were using drugs or abusing alcohol when they were pregnant and now have to deal with LIFE LONG issues. Those are the parents, who, forgive me for saying this, should be sterilized. And honestly, it makes me NOT want to EVER have kids because of all the problems I see out there....and you would be surprised at the amount of parents who just leave their kids at the hospital, hardly see them, and then wonder how the heck to care for the health problems once they return home - and then BLAME the hospital for not properly educating them. Well, if they attended the sessions, they would know. Anyways, I have seen my share of parents who make my blood boil!!!


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## zima-cheryl

HockeyKat said:


> Oh BTW... I am looking for a new, more permanent form of birth control.  I am currently on Yasmin and have no problems with it, but I would like something I didn't have to refill often and take daily.  My insurance covers birth control other than the pill 100%.  Any suggestions?   I would love to have my tubes tied but at 31, healthy, married, no doctor would do it.



I would suggest you look into the Essure:  http://www.essure.com
I had this done back in March.  It was done in the doctor's office & is less invasive than surgery, like having your tubes tied.  I go in about 2 weeks for the follow up to make sure everything is okay. 

Keep in mind it is permanent, so be 100% sure before going ahead w/the procedure.  Also, keep in mind that Essure's info. is marketing - I did find the process and recovery a bit more than they lead you to believe.  That said, even knowing what I know now, I would make the same decision again.  

My doctor was very reasonable, and after several conversations she understood where DH & I were at and agreed to do the procedure.  Personally, I think a doctor that would do it at first request w/out making sure you realized what you were signing on to do isn't a doctor I would trust.  This is a big step, so they need to be sure we aren't making a decision in the heat of the moment.  

Good luck - there are so many options now days, I'm sure you will figure out the best one for you.  (We really are lucky to live in a time where we have so many options & possibilities!)

Side question - what is the "Hockey" in "HockeyKat"?  Are you cheering for either Anaheim?  Or the Senators? in the Stanley Cup playoffs?


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## kennancat

HockeyKat said:


> Oh BTW... I am looking for a new, more permanent form of birth control.  I am currently on Yasmin and have no problems with it, but I would like something I didn't have to refill often and take daily.  My insurance covers birth control other than the pill 100%.  Any suggestions?   I would love to have my tubes tied but at 31, healthy, married, no doctor would do it.


I've been on Depo Provera (the shot) for 4 and a half years and it sounds like that might work for you. I would recommend it, even though my experience has been both good and bad. Let me warn you that my first couple of shots were hell  Eventually, the monthly visits go away, but until they're completely gone, you'll experience "spotting", aka a 12-week period. Between that and the mood swings, wasn't too keen on doing the second shot. However, I figured I'd gone through it for twelve weeks at that point, might as well go for the second round and see if was the same or any better. Luckily, it got better, and the next time it was better still. By the end of the first year, it was marvelous - no periods, only had to deal with BC every few months, prevention rate is better than most pills, etc. I did gain weight while I was on it, but I don't feel like I can blame that on it because I was already gaining weight before I started on it. I did lose the extra weight and although I've gained it back (about 25lbs over goal weight) I still feel like that's more to do with too many trips to the bakery and not exercising. I have decided to go off it soon because I do wonder if it's causing me to be depressed at times and I think a lower dose pill might not affect me the same way. I've also read about possible negative impact that it may have on bone density, so that's important to consider too. I had a bone scan a year or so ago just to make sure that I was okay (I was fine). Like I said, it has its good and bad points, but what BC doesn't, right? I think it's a great option for any woman who needs a more permanent BC but either can't or doesn't want to go for sterilization just yet.


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## LuluLovesDisney

HockeyKat said:


> Oh BTW... I am looking for a new, more permanent form of birth control.  I am currently on Yasmin and have no problems with it, but I would like something I didn't have to refill often and take daily.  My insurance covers birth control other than the pill 100%.  Any suggestions?   I would love to have my tubes tied but at 31, healthy, married, no doctor would do it.



NUVARING. I love it. I pay almost $50 cash a month for mine so if you can get it free, DO IT! You don't feel it and it is easy to put in - just once a month. If you use tampons, it can move, but that's happened about 3 times in 3 years.


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## kennancat

ChisJo said:


> I used to be a waitress in a bar, and you would be surprised at the amount of pregnant younger girls and women (both professional and otherwise) and they ordered a drink..."only one - won't hurt the baby".


I want to say that I don't advocate pregnant women drinking like fish, but I do wonder if the whole "thou shalt not touch a drop of alcohol while pregnant" isn't part of the pregnancy fear conspiracy. Like not being able to have ocean fish (mercury), farmed fish (PCBs), sushi (bacteria), chocolate (caffeine), coffee (caffeine again), luncheon meats (listeria), soft cheese (more listeria), and so on and so forth. It seems like a lot of these restrictions only came along in the last fifty or so years even though human beings somehow managed to populate the planet while consuming all this stuff. After all, wasn't beer originally invented because it was a good way to make impure water safe to drink? I'm sure pregnant women in the 1800s consumed their fair share of it.

Like I said, I don't want to see pregnant women drink enough to cause FAS, but it just bugs me the way pregnancy and mommyhood have this hysterical aspect that goes with them sometimes. It's this whole idea that if something has a 0.00000001 chance of being bad, you need to avoid it and if you don't, then you're a lousy parent. I remember reading once the chances of developing lung cancer from exposure to asbestos versus dying in a high school football game. Needless to say, the game is far more dangerous, but schools didn't ban football while they ripped all the asbestos out of the buildings. If I ever did decide to have kids, I probably wouldn't drink just because the risk isn't worth the reward. However, I would continue to eat fish - I think it provides enough health benefits to outweigh the concern. I wish there was more support for parents and pregnant women to make reasonable, rational judgment calls when it comes to making decisions that involve risk and not just freaking out because it's beyond our control and / or unknown.


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## ChisJo

kennancat said:


> I want to say that I don't advocate pregnant women drinking like fish, but I do wonder if the whole "thou shalt not touch a drop of alcohol while pregnant" isn't part of the pregnancy fear conspiracy. Like not being able to have ocean fish (mercury), farmed fish (PCBs), sushi (bacteria), chocolate (caffeine), coffee (caffeine again), luncheon meats (listeria), soft cheese (more listeria), and so on and so forth. It seems like a lot of these restrictions only came along in the last fifty or so years even though human beings somehow managed to populate the planet while consuming all this stuff. After all, wasn't beer originally invented because it was a good way to make impure water safe to drink? I'm sure pregnant women in the 1800s consumed their fair share of it.
> 
> Like I said, I don't want to see pregnant women drink enough to cause FAS, but it just bugs me the way pregnancy and mommyhood have this hysterical aspect that goes with them sometimes. It's this whole idea that if something has a 0.00000001 chance of being bad, you need to avoid it and if you don't, then you're a lousy parent. I remember reading once the chances of developing lung cancer from exposure to asbestos versus dying in a high school football game. Needless to say, the game is far more dangerous, but schools didn't ban football while they ripped all the asbestos out of the buildings. If I ever did decide to have kids, I probably wouldn't drink just because the risk isn't worth the reward. However, I would continue to eat fish - I think it provides enough health benefits to outweigh the concern. I wish there was more support for parents and pregnant women to make reasonable, rational judgment calls when it comes to making decisions that involve risk and not just freaking out because it's beyond our control and / or unknown.




I have a hard time understanding the whole mercury, caffeine, etc., thing, but I have to say, working in pediatrics, I see far too many kids with problems from drinking and drug abuse while in utero. A woman who drinks during pregnancy does have that chance of having a child with difficulties....why take that chance?? And how many of them give up their parental rights because all of the sudden, they have a child with too many problems that they cannot handle? It just isn't worth the chance....and as a person who worked in a bar, I felt it was my duty to refuse them that alcohol. It's the same with pregnant women who smoke....we all know that it damages the already delicate lungs of the child...so why would we sell them cigarettes? The health care system is already bombarded, why create more problems?


----------



## scooter15

zima-cheryl said:


> I would suggest you look into the Essure:  http://www.essure.com
> I had this done back in March.  It was done in the doctor's office & is less invasive than surgery, like having your tubes tied.  I go in about 2 weeks for the follow up to make sure everything is okay.
> 
> Keep in mind it is permanent, so be 100% sure before going ahead w/the procedure.  Also, keep in mind that Essure's info. is marketing - I did find the process and recovery a bit more than they lead you to believe.  That said, even knowing what I know now, I would make the same decision again.




My OB suggested this also while I was pregnant with my last child.  I told her that this would be my last and she said she'd rather have me do that procedure than getting my tubes tied.  I just wanted to know what your experience was like.  You can PM me.


----------



## LindsayDunn228

Hixski said:


> I liked the Ten Commandments.....this is so true in DH and my situation. Here are some things we have to deal with because we are childfree.


 I love them!!



maddhatir said:


> Snip-snip for DH!!!!! Faster recovery time than you having your tubes tied!!! Fast and easy!


This is what we did, too and are so glad we did it!!


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## LoveStitch626

ChisJo said:


> I have a hard time understanding the whole mercury, caffeine, etc., thing, but I have to say, working in pediatrics, I see far too many kids with problems from drinking and drug abuse while in utero. A woman who drinks during pregnancy does have that chance of having a child with difficulties....why take that chance?? And how many of them give up their parental rights because all of the sudden, they have a child with too many problems that they cannot handle? It just isn't worth the chance....and as a person who worked in a bar, I felt it was my duty to refuse them that alcohol. It's the same with pregnant women who smoke....we all know that it damages the already delicate lungs of the child...so why would we sell them cigarettes? The health care system is already bombarded, why create more problems?




Lemme ask ya a question then... I know an idiot who thinks drinking a couple of O'douls PER DAY is ok while she's pregnant. She's been doing this since she found out. She refuses to listen to anyone who says she's being stupid and her little dumbA friends just tell her it's ok. Any input on that? (I figured you'd know so I thought I'd ask your thoughts on it  )


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## GraLaur07

Krissalee said:


> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!



I'm so glad i came across this .... I'm only 23 and have never wanted children... my dbf is supportive as he knew my position on kids before we got together... the problem i have is the same as you except i get your young you'll change you mind but i can not see me doing this.... at Christmas this year my dad had a major go at me saying how i was being unfair to my bf and I'm not considering his feelings.... is he the one going through labor?... or having a child that is not wanted?.... it left me pretty low although my dad did say sorry it was the alcohol talking according to him the next day.....    i love kids in moderation but i have no longing to have one what so ever.... sometime i feel not normal because  society expects you  to have children .... i dont even like thinking about something living in side me .... i know i will get famed by some ppl for what i am saying .... i just find it hard sometimes


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## LauraAnn630

I f I didnt want children, I wouldnt have them.  Everyone one else will just have to get used to it!

I did want children.  When I finally got pregnant I was so happy.  
Then I got sick as a dog!  I stayed sick for months!
I hated the way my baby felt inside me.  I never told anyone.  
I thought they would think I was nuts!


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## ChisJo

LoveStitch626 said:


> Lemme ask ya a question then... I know an idiot who thinks drinking a couple of O'douls PER DAY is ok while she's pregnant. She's been doing this since she found out. She refuses to listen to anyone who says she's being stupid and her little dumbA friends just tell her it's ok. Any input on that? (I figured you'd know so I thought I'd ask your thoughts on it  )



I've never actually done any research on this, but, just to comment, there is a difference between non-alcoholic and alcohol free beers. There still is that 0.5% alcohol in O'douls, and while I couldn't find any research on any of my research databases to say that this amount is harmful to the baby, I would still say there is that chance, albeit a smaller chance, especially in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. I wish I could give you more, but if I was pregnant, I would be reading the labels a little more carefully to make sure it's alcohol free....9 months of no drinking is better than a lifetime of having a child with potential health problems....


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## ChisJo

kennancat said:


> I've been on Depo Provera (the shot) for 4 and a half years and it sounds like that might work for you. I would recommend it, even though my experience has been both good and bad. Let me warn you that my first couple of shots were hell



Depo = BAD!!! I was on it for 8 years....I thought I loved it. I loved not having a period for that whole time. I never spotted - EVER. Now, let me tell you what did happen that made the entire experience terrible....
1) Lost all interest in any sexual activity...literally, the thought of being with my BF was revolting....and I truly loved him. He was lucky if once a month happened. Before the depo shot, this never happened. We are no longer together. No wonder pregnancy doesn't happen - when you don't have sex, you can't get pregnant!
2) Gained TONS of weight....literally, went from a size 4 to a size 12. I have been off the shot now for 2 years, and just hit a 6. Not so fun.
3) my personality changed...drastically. I became a totally different person. I kind of lost that fun part of my personality, and became a little bitter at just about everything. It wasn't until after that I realized how I had changed. I actually was told by my mother that I was a better person now. Wow - I didn't know I was like that.
4) I got major depression....literally. I wouldn't want to get out of bed. I had to go on an antidepressant for awhile just to get motivated to do anything.
5) I didn't know that depo depletes your calcium absorption...my dr. didn't really know either as depo was pretty new on the market. He never told to either ensure that i am eating enough yoguart or drinking milk, or ensuring I have a calcium supplement everyday just to ensure that enough calcium is being absorbed (quick anatomy lessson....having a period HELPS to absorb calcium into our bones...that is why when we stop menstruating, we have a higher chance of osteoporosis).

And just some more information on the depo shot....if it doesn't work for you, it's in your system for 12 weeks....you can't get rid of it. You can be ornery and spotting the whole time. But, if it does work for you, great. It's not for everyone, but I have met more who hated it then who liked it.

I've been on the Merina IUD for 3 months and like it. It is a low dose of hormones, it needs to be replaced every 5 years, and if I have problems, I just get it taken out. This isn't for everyone either....But, at least you have some ideas from this board as to which direction you can go.

Cheers - Jo


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## Hixski

When I was in my early thirties I got off the pill. DH and thought we would probably have at least have one child. We were still fence sitters while actually trying. I was off the pill for 5 years. My OB kept asking if I wanted to be tested and DH too. No, no we will just let nature take its course. When it didn't we decided we did not want to do everything possible and decided just to not have a child. I am on the lowest dose pill you can get. Being 47 , nature is now taking care of the issue. Can we say pre-menopause.  
My OB keeps me on the pill as he says it is still a lower dose than the hormones he gives his menopausal patients. I am one of those women that never had problem periods (extra testoterone) and except for my brain going the menopause stuff isn't so bad for me either. All my same aged friends hate me right now.


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## Liisa

GraLaur07 said:


> I'm so glad i came across this .... I'm only 23 and have never wanted children... my dbf is supportive as he knew my position on kids before we got together... the problem i have is the same as you except i get your young you'll change you mind but i can not see me doing this.... at Christmas this year my dad had a major go at me saying how i was being unfair to my bf and I'm not considering his feelings.... is he the one going through labor?... or having a child that is not wanted?.... it left me pretty low although my dad did say sorry it was the alcohol talking according to him the next day.....    i love kids in moderation but i have no longing to have one what so ever.... sometime i feel not normal because  society expects you  to have children .... i dont even like thinking about something living in side me .... i know i will get famed by some ppl for what i am saying .... i just find it hard sometimes




GraLaur07,

Hang in there.  If you can't tell already, you are in good company with others who haven't been bitten by the "i want kids" bug.  I found that after several years of always having the same answer to the "don't you want kids" question, my friends and family finally realize I am serious.  DH and I don't want kids.  End of story.  It just takes a little longer for the people around you to grasp that you can actually make that decision!  

Liisa

P.S.  You're in Scotland???  That is sooo cool!  That is on our list of places to visit.  As has been mentioned before, No kids = more disposable income, which for us means MORE VACATIONS!!!


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## Liisa

Dreary, Rainy day here in Connecticut.  Thought I'd lighten things up...  Anyone got any fabulous vacations planned in the next year with all that "disposable income" you've got hanging around since you don't have to save for jr's college?

DH and I are headed to WDW twice this year...  Planning a trip to the Grand Canyon next Spring.  (Having two dogs limits us a bit from the LOOONNNGGG vacations as we have a dog / housesitter while we are away....)


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## ChisJo

With our disposable income, next year we are buying an Audi TT since the mortgage will be paid!! And the year after that, we are hoping to be able to do a 3 month vacation to Europe, taking our time and enjoying it instead of having to rush rush rush!!


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## PrincessKitty1

Liisa said:


> Dreary, Rainy day here in Connecticut.  Thought I'd lighten things up...  Anyone got any fabulous vacations planned in the next year with all that "disposable income" you've got hanging around since you don't have to save for jr's college?
> 
> DH and I are headed to WDW twice this year...  Planning a trip to the Grand Canyon next Spring.  (Having two dogs limits us a bit from the LOOONNNGGG vacations as we have a dog / housesitter while we are away....)




We take lots of short vacations (generally one long weekend per month) since DH is self-employed and doesn't want to stay away from his clients too long.   We've gone to Disney three times this year (our dog was sick and then passed away in March, so we didn't take any mini-vacations early in the years), and plan to go for 2 long weekends during the Food and Wine Festival and hopefully for Christmas too!  

Other than that, we have plans for the 4th of July in St. Augustine and will probably do beach weekends this month and in August.


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## WDWguru

We were in Tokyo and Hong Kong (and of course all the Disney parks there) in late December, hit Vegas in January and again in April, just got back from WDW. 

We head to Vegas again in June (Police concert!). We'll be living in the UK for the month of July and will be going to Prague, Pisa/Florence and Paris (+ Disneyland, which will complete our world circuit of Disney parks) while there. In August we'll take our third Alaska cruise, then back to WDW in December! DH travels a lot for work so I tend to tag along, but it's also what we enjoy doing with our free time. We have hit just about every place on our list - a few big ones left include Africa (safari!), the Galapagos and Dubai.


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## Liisa

WDWguru said:


> We have hit just about every place on our list - a few big ones left include Africa (safari!), the Galapagos and Dubai.




An African safari is on our list as well!  

We had done Italy (Bari, Rome, Florence, Venice, Pisa) on our honeymoon... but we hope to get back there to spend more time in Tuscany - we had one day trip to an olive vineyard and a nice dinner there... not enough time to appreciate the region.  

I love hearing about everyone's plans!!!


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## luvthemouse71

HockeyKat said:


> Hahahah!!
> 
> I am actually rather lucky in this regard, as I chose a technical profession with almost no women in my department, at this job or any of the 8 I have had in the past 10 years (yeah, not exactly a STABLE profession!).  Most of the men are from other countries and/or have SAHM as wives.
> 
> My boss does have kids but they are teenagers, and he is a workaholic anyhow, so the thought of leaving at 2PM is NOT acceptable in my department.   I have actually never worked in a place where they put any emphasis on family time... I guess when you get into tech you know that the hours can be long/wonky.
> 
> Both my job and my husband's job penalize families way more than singles for health care.  Employee only for me is free, and for him is $80/month... Family for my company is $200+, and same for him.
> 
> I do offer to take weekend time and holidays, since my DH is in retail and we can never take traditional vacations.   Summer, Christmas, spring break is the LAST time I would want to take vacation anyhow... too many kids, too many people.  I don't really like family holidays anymore... we wind up relegated to the kids table w/ siblings, cousins, and their babies, talking about diaper wipes and potty training.
> 
> Maybe I *am* bitter.
> 
> Oh BTW... I am looking for a new, more permanent form of birth control.  I am currently on Yasmin and have no problems with it, but I would like something I didn't have to refill often and take daily.  My insurance covers birth control other than the pill 100%.  Any suggestions?   I would love to have my tubes tied but at 31, healthy, married, no doctor would do it.


Really? They wouldn't tie your tubes at 31? I work as an OR nurse, and we do tubal ligations at my hospital. I've seen them as young as 24...It does depend on your doc though. Come to New England..we'll tie them for ya!


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## PrincessKitty1

luvthemouse71 said:


> Really? They wouldn't tie your tubes at 31? I work as an OR nurse, and we do tubal ligations at my hospital. I've seen them as young as 24...It does depend on your doc though. Come to New England..we'll tie them for ya!




A friend of mine had them tied at the age of 21 in the 1970s! I really think you could find a doctor to do it--you might have to shop around a bit.

As for me, I never had my tubes tied because everybody kept telling me I'd change my mind...I wanted to leave the option available, just in case....and here I am at 50, and never changed my mind!


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## kennancat

ChisJo said:


> 5) I didn't know that depo depletes your calcium absorption...my dr. didn't really know either as depo was pretty new on the market.


Jo - I would definitely recommend that you bring the potential for bone mass loss up with your current doctor since you were on it for so long. At this point, they don't recommend you stay on it for more than 2 years unless you have no other options. Check out this link on the FDA's web site: http://www.fda.gov/bbs/topics/ANSWERS/2004/ANS01325.html
My plan is to get off next month and I plan to talk to my new gyno (I'm changing that too) about doing another bone scan. My biggest concern is that if it is deteriorating faster than is healthy, I'd rather address it now instead of when I'm older.


----------



## HockeyKat

zima-cheryl said:


> I would suggest you look into the Essure:  http://www.essure.com
> I had this done back in March.  It was done in the doctor's office & is less invasive than surgery, like having your tubes tied.  I go in about 2 weeks for the follow up to make sure everything is okay.
> 
> Keep in mind it is permanent, so be 100% sure before going ahead w/the procedure.  Also, keep in mind that Essure's info. is marketing - I did find the process and recovery a bit more than they lead you to believe.  That said, even knowing what I know now, I would make the same decision again.
> 
> My doctor was very reasonable, and after several conversations she understood where DH & I were at and agreed to do the procedure.  Personally, I think a doctor that would do it at first request w/out making sure you realized what you were signing on to do isn't a doctor I would trust.  This is a big step, so they need to be sure we aren't making a decision in the heat of the moment.
> 
> Good luck - there are so many options now days, I'm sure you will figure out the best one for you.  (We really are lucky to live in a time where we have so many options & possibilities!)
> 
> Side question - what is the "Hockey" in "HockeyKat"?  Are you cheering for either Anaheim?  Or the Senators? in the Stanley Cup playoffs?



Hockey is for being crazy about hockey.  I am pulling for the Sens, but I like both teams.  DH grew up in Ottawa so they are his 2nd fav.  I grew up in Pittsburgh so the Pens are my 2nd fav.  We live in Raleigh-Durham, NC, so our first fav team is Carolina.  We got to see them award the Cup last year which was cool.  Both of us play hockey, as well... that is how we met.



kennancat said:


> I've been on Depo Provera (the shot) for 4 and a half years and it sounds like that might work for you. I would recommend it, even though my experience has been both good and bad. Let me warn you that my first couple of shots were hell  Eventually, the monthly visits go away, but until they're completely gone, you'll experience "spotting", aka a 12-week period. Between that and the mood swings, wasn't too keen on doing the second shot. However, I figured I'd gone through it for twelve weeks at that point, might as well go for the second round and see if was the same or any better. Luckily, it got better, and the next time it was better still. By the end of the first year, it was marvelous - no periods, only had to deal with BC every few months, prevention rate is better than most pills, etc. I did gain weight while I was on it, but I don't feel like I can blame that on it because I was already gaining weight before I started on it. I did lose the extra weight and although I've gained it back (about 25lbs over goal weight) I still feel like that's more to do with too many trips to the bakery and not exercising. I have decided to go off it soon because I do wonder if it's causing me to be depressed at times and I think a lower dose pill might not affect me the same way. I've also read about possible negative impact that it may have on bone density, so that's important to consider too. I had a bone scan a year or so ago just to make sure that I was okay (I was fine). Like I said, it has its good and bad points, but what BC doesn't, right? I think it's a great option for any woman who needs a more permanent BC but either can't or doesn't want to go for sterilization just yet.



I am afraid of Depo.  Weight gain, depression, etc.  Also, I either want sterilized or I want to continue to have a period... it freaks me out not to otherwise.



LuluLovesDisney said:


> NUVARING. I love it. I pay almost $50 cash a month for mine so if you can get it free, DO IT! You don't feel it and it is easy to put in - just once a month. If you use tampons, it can move, but that's happened about 3 times in 3 years.



Not sure about Nuvaring... if it is prescription it is not covered by the insurance, but by the precription plan so it might be $$.  Crazy HMOs.



GraLaur07 said:


> I'm so glad i came across this .... I'm only 23 and have never wanted children... my dbf is supportive as he knew my position on kids before we got together... the problem i have is the same as you except i get your young you'll change you mind but i can not see me doing this.... at Christmas this year my dad had a major go at me saying how i was being unfair to my bf and I'm not considering his feelings.... is he the one going through labor?... or having a child that is not wanted?.... it left me pretty low although my dad did say sorry it was the alcohol talking according to him the next day.....    i love kids in moderation but i have no longing to have one what so ever.... sometime i feel not normal because  society expects you  to have children .... i dont even like thinking about something living in side me .... i know i will get famed by some ppl for what i am saying .... i just find it hard sometimes



I completely understand.  I have known since I was in high school that I didn't want children.  I am 31 now and I still get the "you'll change your mind" thing and I despise hearing that.  I don't even like kids in moderation.  The thought of having one inside me makes me shudder.  I don't want to carry, birth, or raise one.    My mom gives me grief all the time.  So anyhow, maybe we aren't "normal" but then again what is... just wanted to let you know you aren't alone.

Thanks for all the BC advice!  I have to make a physical appt. soon so I will be better armed for the talk w/ my doctor.


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## LindsayDunn228

Liisa said:


> Dreary, Rainy day here in Connecticut.  Thought I'd lighten things up...  Anyone got any fabulous vacations planned in the next year with all that "disposable income" you've got hanging around since you don't have to save for jr's college?


Yes! We are going to WDW in November. It's actually a family trip with my husband's parents and his brother. I can't wait!


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## Mrs.Reese

A week of Disney in August

A panama cruise at Christmas

A two-week tour of England, Ireland and Scotland in July 2008

It's a great life!


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## Hixski

Let me see now.

We went skiing in January.
Vegas in February.
DH had a guys golf trip in April.
Disney cruise in September with a couple of days at WDW too.

Beyond that I know we are going to do an Alaskan cruise next summer. For our 25th anniversary in 2010 we are going to sit on a beach for 1 week in Oahu and then take a week cruise to the other islands. Those are the only vacations I know of for sure.


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## LoveStitch626

We haven't had much "fun" this year since DH started a new job. Let's see though.. we are building a deck, putting in a hot tub, and getting our yard landscaped (diy). We're also working on the house..pulling up carpet and making it a lot prettier. As far as fun trips go, I'm planning a WDW trip for November/December with MIL (  lol I know!) Me and a couple of girlfriends have a "girls weekend" trip up to the Renaissance Fair in November but it may end up our guys go too. But hey.. that's ok too! We'll be able to see if the 5 of us can tolerate each other in one suite lol. We're planning a WDW trip for the 5 of us next December and staying in the WL Villas. We've also thrown around the idea of a few girls only slumber parties while the guys go hunting for the weekend. We've got a few parties planned for this summer once the deck is built. The Fab 5 have been on a Saturday night rotation for cooking dinner. Each Saturday one of us cooks dinner for the rest then we play cards/dice/dominos/have a few drinks. Some friends of ours are moving down in a couple of weeks, so that'll be fun too.


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## Hixski

LoveStitch626 said:


> We haven't had much "fun" this year since DH started a new job. Let's see though.. we are building a deck, putting in a hot tub, and getting our yard landscaped (diy). We're also working on the house..pulling up carpet and making it a lot prettier. As far as fun trips go, I'm planning a WDW trip for November/December with MIL (  lol I know!) Me and a couple of girlfriends have a "girls weekend" trip up to the Renaissance Fair in November but it may end up our guys go too. But hey.. that's ok too! We'll be able to see if the 5 of us can tolerate each other in one suite lol. We're planning a WDW trip for the 5 of us next December and staying in the WL Villas. We've also thrown around the idea of a few girls only slumber parties while the guys go hunting for the weekend. We've got a few parties planned for this summer once the deck is built. The Fab 5 have been on a Saturday night rotation for cooking dinner. Each Saturday one of us cooks dinner for the rest then we play cards/dice/dominos/have a few drinks. Some friends of ours are moving down in a couple of weeks, so that'll be fun too.



With all of your remodeling you should subscribe to this thread. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1379800

Some of those folks on there are doing whole house remodeling. My small projects seem tame on there.


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## Aggiegrl

Hi everyone!

I'm new to the boards, I somehow I stumbled across this thread.  I sort of fit in here, and I love seeing all of your posts--well the ones I have read.  I don't have time to read all 1500!

DH and I are 25, been married for 3 years, and have been together for 7.  Right now we have no plans to have children.  We just bought a house and have 2 horses, 2 rabbits, and 2 turtles (they all need companions, you know!).  We love to travel, to eat out, to do couple things.  Everywhere we go we are mistaken for "just-marrieds" since we are very happy and very affectionate with each other.  

Everyone else our age is popping out babies.  My MIL reminds me weekly about this--we bought a new mattress this weekend and she bought the sheets for it, saying these are for making grandchildren.  She is partially joking, but as we all know, she is partially not...oh well, I have nice sheets!  

I don't want to loose my freedoms for a child.  I love the family relationships we have with the generations above us, and I will miss that if we don't have children.  But still, I'm not sure that is worth it.

More over, I would go crazy without a career.  I have been unemployed twice in the past 3 years due to moving for DH's job, 6 months each time.  I went absolutely crazy.  I tried to be a good little domestic wife and it was horrible.  I felt my brain going to mush.

I love my career in non-profits, ironically I am a director of youth for a 100,000 member organization!  Non-profits don't pay much, so it would eat up almost ALL of my monthly salary for child care if I wanted to work.  It seems like such a burden.  That's the money we do "fun stuff" with now.

I guess I don't have a point, but I needed to vent to others that can understand!

...and BTW, DH and I are at the CSR the first week of September.  We have free dining, and because we don't have kids, we can really enjoy all the NICER 2 TS restaurants in the world.  No character dining of buffets for us!


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## maddhatir

Welcome to the board Aggiegrl! 




Aggiegrl said:


> Everyone else our age is popping out babies.  My MIL reminds me weekly about this--we bought a new mattress this weekend and she bought the sheets for it, saying *these are for making grandchildren*.



I am sorry- I just have to do this........
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




....Ok all better!


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## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> Welcome to the board Aggiegrl!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I am sorry- I just have to do this........
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ....Ok all better!



LMAO My thoughts exactly. 


Welcome to the boards Aggie...this could be fun when football season comes back around!! (assuming you're a Texas Aggie LOL I bleed burnt orange myself  )  Bevo


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## gatour

For our major vacation this year we will be taking my parents on a cruise for their 50th wedding anniversary in Sept.  We have already made several long weekend trips to the mouse house and next week we will be going to the F1 race in Indy.  In addition I went down to Daytona a couple times during in the early/early spring to watch the Grand Am practice and Rolex 24 hour's race.  I can just imagine having to explain that last part to my wife if we had kids.


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## maddhatir

Our last vacation was right after Thanksgiving 2006- to Disney. 

DH was just saying the other day that it has been 6 months without a vacation! Blasphemy!

Right now he is starting an addition project so we will not be going ANYWHERE for a few months But he was saying last night as he was taking the sledge hammer to the wall- that we will need a nice vacation after this! 

I had "Let's go" out of my mouth and then I stopped, and thought, what are you crazy woman? and then continued on....... to Europe! (never been) he said the last thing he will want to do after all of this is sightsee! I know the only sightseeing he will want to be doing is seeing the inside of his eyelids......on a beach.......with a drink in his hand...and the sun on his face.

Yes- he loves to do "all inclusives" eh- I can care less. A beach is a beach to me. We lived in St John USVI for 5 months, so I got my fill of sand, sea and sunshine to last a lifetime!

I would like to go somewhere and see something.......interesting. I like to walk, he likes to be horizontal


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## zima-cheryl

Liisa said:


> Dreary, Rainy day here in Connecticut.  Thought I'd lighten things up...  Anyone got any fabulous vacations planned in the next year with all that "disposable income" you've got hanging around since you don't have to save for jr's college?



DH & I just got back from a nice long weekend in Philly.
Since he started a new job we are some what limited in days off this year but will still manage to get to Oswego, NY for Harborfest, an overnight at Mohegan Sun, a long weekend in Bar Harbor, ME and are taking the week of our anniversary off to do some local things (Mystic, Storrowtown, Boston, maybe a Red Sox game).  
Next year - Cancun, Mexico!


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## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> DH & I just got back from a nice long weekend in Philly.
> Since he started a new job we are some what limited in days off this year but will still manage to get to Oswego, NY for Harborfest, an overnight at Mohegan Sun, a long weekend in Bar Harbor, ME and are taking the week of our anniversary off to do some local things (Mystic, Storrowtown, Boston, maybe a Red Sox game).
> Next year - Cancun, Mexico!



You know what? I live 20 minutes from Philly and I used to hang out on South Street when I was younger- I love Rittenhouse Sq.DH and I have walked through the historical areas- But I would really like to take a tour of the city with a tour guide etc- there is so much history there and I want to be up close and personal to it!- Not just drive by it. 

I keep telling his during the fall I would love take a tour- I love the fall!

And- yes- I HAVE been up close to the Liberty Bell!


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## maddhatir

OK- so I found this on the freebie board- I find it interesting! 

Keep them out of your Hair for Days!


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## Liisa

Maddhatir,

I'm probably not sharing anything you don't already know, but tomorrow is Mr. Depp's 44 birthday!

I plan on having a drink on his behalf to celebrate!   

Liisa


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## Hixski

Thanks Liisa, I was just about to post this link and say "HELP". 
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1478705&page=2

Some of those folks are really trying my patience on that one. You try to be civil and say you don't hate kids just want some decent behaviour and BAM.... They decend on you like vultures. I think the ones that try to defend bad behaviour must feel guilty or something. Could they have spawns of the devil themselves?


----------



## Liisa

Not a problem.  The tone of the replies to your example were just wrong... you gave an EXAMPLE for pete's sake.  UGH!!!  So you're saying that you weren't listening to a screaming kid for precisely 20 minutes... what's wrong with you, didn't you time it on your stop watch so that you could reference it later on the DIS boards?!!!   

I was happy to see that the overall tone for that thread was that there are alot of ill behaved kids out there.  I'm sure the OP isn't thrilled that the responses aren't all "children are wonderful all the time and people who don't want kids are just evil".  

How can people not see that kids are not nearly as well behaved as they were 10 or 20 years ago?  Are they not reading the papers or watching TV?  Just check out the rising statistics of people who don't want kids... that should say something right there!!!!

Kids will be kids... sure.  But when they are being disruptive or disrespectful, let's actually PARENT THEM!!!!  (well, not me, precisely, but you know what I mean...)


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## Mrs.Reese

Ah but if we "parent them" then we are ruining their self-esteem.   

That was the line fed to me by one "angel's" mom.  Her son decided to punch another child in the face because he wanted to go down the slide first.


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## Liisa

Mrs.Reese said:


> Ah but if we "parent them" then we are ruining their self-esteem.



You are right... my self-esteem would have been much improved if my parents hadn't held me to such high standards.  Shame on them.  In fact, I'm going to call my mom and let her know!   

What did the parents of the child who was the recipient of the punch have to say?  I don't think they care too much for the bully's self esteem!  It really is tough to be a kid these days (Which is also the title of Disney's next 3-D adventure ITTBEK!  (Sorry, it's been a long day... I should probably just head to bed now!!!)


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## Liisa

By the way, Mrs. Reese... what dates are you going to be in Disney?

Nevermind, looks like it will be in August, I had miscounted (did I mention it was a long day - and I call myself an accountant!!!)  I'll be there in September and thought we might overlap!


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## Liisa

It's kind of nice being able to come back to this thread... the "why do people hate kids thread" is way too intense!   On the bright side, it should keep some of the VERY pro child people away from us for a while.   

My nephew came to visit with his parents this afternoon.  He's five and a ball of unstoppable energy.  I'm exhausted.  Love to see him come, love to have peace and quiet afterward.  

Hixski, have you given up on the other thread?  It's scary over there...


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## Hixski

Liisa said:


> It's kind of nice being able to come back to this thread... the "why do people hate kids thread" is way too intense!   On the bright side, it should keep some of the VERY pro child people away from us for a while.
> 
> My nephew came to visit with his parents this afternoon.  He's five and a ball of unstoppable energy.  I'm exhausted.  Love to see him come, love to have peace and quiet afterward.
> 
> Hixski, have you given up on the other thread?  It's scary over there...



I haven't given up quite yet. I got quoted a couple of times but people came to my rescue. Just kind of lurking right now. What makes me sick is some of them posting about websites from the fanatical childfree. We are on the DIS for crying out loud. We are happy childfree people. Not the kooks they are portraying us as.


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## Liisa

Hixski said:


> I haven't given up quite yet. I got quoted a couple of times but people came to my rescue. Just kind of lurking right now. What makes me sick is some of them posting about websites from the fanatical childfree. We are on the DIS for crying out loud. We are happy childfree people. Not the kooks they are portraying us as.



Absolutely!  There is a huge difference between those of us who are child free and happy and people who think the entire world should be child free!!!  I really, really doubt that the fanatical childfree people are either posting on the DIS boards or taking vacations to Disney World.  Wouldn't that be a kind of self torture for them?


----------



## Hixski

Liisa said:


> Absolutely!  There is a huge difference between those of us who are child free and happy and people who think the entire world should be child free!!!  I really, really doubt that the fanatical childfree people are either posting on the DIS boards or taking vacations to Disney World.  Wouldn't that be a kind of self torture for them?



I am now officially done over on that thread. Someone said I quoted them on another thread. And to get it right. I assume they mean this one. Do you see any quote here from me from that thread. Nope. So I am done. I promise to stay here with all the HAPPY childfree.


----------



## Liisa

Hixski said:


> I am now officially done over on that thread. Someone said I quoted them on another thread. And to get it right. I assume they mean this one. Do you see any quote here from me from that thread. Nope. So I am done. I promise to stay here with all the HAPPY childfree.




Welcome back!!!  I did see that and was wondering what the heck they were talking about.  Maybe they are just paranoid?  (Having kids will do that to you... along with nervous twitches - sorry, the other thread has me a bit bitter right now).  And I'll never understand how parents think that all is right in the world of kids these days.  I never had to walk through a metal detector on my way into school or worry about one of my classmates building a bomb...  I really feel bad for the good kids, so much to overcome these days.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

I too feel bad for the good ones.  I had 26 this year and of that only 3 were "angels."  Most of the kids I teach are full of life and actually pretty fun to be around. 

Oh the puncher ~ He got suspended for the rest of the school year.  It hadn't been the first time.  His mom refuses to acknowledge that this behavior is being done by her son. Now, keep in mind that I teach Kindergarten.


----------



## Liisa

Mrs.Reese said:


> Now, keep in mind that I teach Kindergarten.





     I hate to prejudge, but I don't think that boy has a real bright future.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

I will tell people that my career is sometimes the best birth control.


----------



## HockeyKat

Liisa said:


> By the way, Mrs. Reese... what dates are you going to be in Disney?
> 
> Nevermind, looks like it will be in August, I had miscounted (did I mention it was a long day - and I call myself an accountant!!!)  I'll be there in September and thought we might overlap!



Hey Liisa, we will be there in September, 15-26.  20-26 is at BWV.  

Hope everyone had a great childfree weekend!  I spent my Sat doing Habitat for Humanity, and Sunday at Wet N Wild (Greensboro).


----------



## Liisa

HockeyKat said:


> Hey Liisa, we will be there in September, 15-26.  20-26 is at BWV.



HockeyKat,

We overlap...  DH and I are at BWV from Sept 18 - 22!  Small world!

Liisa


----------



## Hixski

HockeyKat said:


> Hey Liisa, we will be there in September, 15-26.  20-26 is at BWV.
> 
> Hope everyone had a great childfree weekend!  I spent my Sat doing Habitat for Humanity, and Sunday at Wet N Wild (Greensboro).




You will be there one day we will. We will be at BCV the 14th. We then do the Eastern DCL 15th-22nd. We are staying at SSR on the 22nd and then flying home on the 23rd.


----------



## Hixski

Liisa said:


> HockeyKat,
> 
> We overlap...  DH and I are at BWV from Sept 18 - 22!  Small world!
> 
> Liisa



We overlap with you too. If either of you are going to be at DTD on the 22nd let me know. DH and I are going to Ragland Road for dinner. We will of course need that place or somewhere else to drown DH and mine sorrows at the end of our vacation.


----------



## HockeyKat

Hixski said:


> We overlap with you too. If either of you are going to be at DTD on the 22nd let me know. DH and I are going to Ragland Road for dinner. We will of course need that place or somewhere else to drown DH and mine sorrows at the end of our vacation.



We currently have an ADR at Marrakesh for that night.  It will definitely be changing, but I don't know to what... we are with another couple, though, so meeting up would be difficult.  DH thinks I am crazy enough for my DIS addiction!


----------



## Liisa

HockeyKat said:


> DH thinks I am crazy enough for my DIS addiction!



Mine too...  but he's always up to go to Disney with me!  (thank goodness!)

We are flying out around noon on the 22nd, so we won't make it to DTD that night.  Plus, we are taking my parents along for the vacation.  I'm going to try to get them over to Adventurer's Club.  We are going to see La Nouba so I think maybe we'll head over afterwards.  I think both my parents would get a good laugh at AC.


----------



## ChisJo

Liisa and Hixski, I came to your defense on the other thread....it took me awhile to read the whole thing, but I did....

We got quoted over here for saying that parents are abusing their children when they discipline them....I asked them to find the quote for me because, unless I"m mistaken, I don't remember their being anything here about that...


----------



## Liisa

ChisJo said:


> We got quoted over here for saying that parents are abusing their children when they discipline them....I asked them to find the quote for me because, unless I"m mistaken, I don't remember their being anything here about that...




That makes two of us.


----------



## Muushka

OK, I need a link to this "thread"!


----------



## maddhatir

Muushka said:


> OK, I need a link to this "thread"!



http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1478705


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1478705



 Oh man! You guys crossed over into the war zone! You can't reason with irrational people. Remember that women give birth to their brains along with their children during labor.  

I guess this is goodbye from me since this fencesitter has decided she wants to try for a baby in the next few months.    and will become stupid and irrational within a year or so.  

As much as baby fever has hit with me, I still find myself not liking other people's kids. I don't want to hold them, see their pictures, or hear about their toilet habits. Parents drive me insane, therefore I won't be joining any mommy groups for playdates so that their evil hellspawn can corrupt my child.

Maybe I should start a thread for people who hate everyone else's kids but their own.  

So ta-ta for now, happy trails, and I will probably be back in a couple years when people start asking me "why do you only have one child?" "don't you know it's not healthy for a child to be alone." etc. etc.  I know where I can come for some rational support and it's certainly not the mommy boards!


----------



## Muushka

maddhatir said:


> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1478705


Thanks!  Looks like I have some homework to do!


----------



## kennancat

plgrn said:


> As much as baby fever has hit with me, I still find myself not liking other people's kids. I don't want to hold them, see their pictures, or hear about their toilet habits. Parents drive me insane, therefore I won't be joining any mommy groups for playdates so that their evil hellspawn can corrupt my child.
> 
> Maybe I should start a thread for people who hate everyone else's kids but their own.


Seriously, I think you'd get a lot of friends on that thread! I was talking to a co-worker the other day, and she was mentioning how she can't stand the "mommy & me" groups. I suspect you all are actually the silent majority  Best of luck to you!


----------



## Liisa

plgrn said:


> I guess this is goodbye from me since this fencesitter has decided she wants to try for a baby in the next few months.    and will become stupid and irrational within a year or so.



Plgrn,

Good luck!!!  Please feel free to come back and keep us posted.  I, for one, will be curious as to how your life is going (in a pleasant, "yay! you got pregnant way")  That must be exciting for you to make that decision.  And I love that you thought about it for a long time before you made a decision.  Makes me think you'll be a good mommy (for examples of bad mommies - see link to the "other thread"!!!)  
 

Best wishes,
Liisa


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Oh man! You guys crossed over into the war zone! You can't reason with irrational people. Remember that women give birth to their brains along with their children during labor.
> 
> I guess this is goodbye from me since this fencesitter has decided she wants to try for a baby in the next few months.    and will become stupid and irrational within a year or so.
> 
> As much as baby fever has hit with me, I still find myself not liking other people's kids. I don't want to hold them, see their pictures, or hear about their toilet habits. Parents drive me insane, therefore I won't be joining any mommy groups for playdates so that their evil hellspawn can corrupt my child.
> 
> Maybe I should start a thread for people who hate everyone else's kids but their own.
> 
> So ta-ta for now, happy trails, and I will probably be back in a couple years when people start asking me "why do you only have one child?" "don't you know it's not healthy for a child to be alone." etc. etc.  I know where I can come for some rational support and it's certainly not the mommy boards!



 ........... ............. ......... 

WoW! Please come back and check in with us and let us know how you are making out- just b/c you are going to the "otherside" doesn't mean we aren't going to miss you!! Congratulations and Good Luck!

I will see you on the freebie boards though- you can get a lot free baby stuff over there!


----------



## aclov

Plgrn:    Best of luck to you!    There's another thread, hopefully you won't have to visit "Childless not by choice"   I often go on there since I fit into that category but this thread is so much fun!      Just because I want kids I totally respect other people's opinions and choices in life.   And honestly, there are ALOT of people out there that shouldn't be parents (including some of DH's relatives! ) and they are raising some wild kids .      

Hopefully, we'll still see you on the freebie board


----------



## druidia

plgrn said:


> Maybe I should start a thread for people who hate everyone else's kids but their own.



Plgrn:  

I suspect that there are MANY people that would join you on that thread.   In my own quest along the fence, I've talked to co-workers and friends who were once blissfully CF and changed their minds.  They still hate all kids but their own.  Every single one of them feels like it's a totally different feeling when it is one's own child.  

Many of them make me feel like they are justifying their decisions, but a select few are some of the most honest and stable people I know, so I trust their opinions, and they are raising their children in the most incredible ways.  They are some of the best behaved kids I've ever known, and that is because their parents don't want them to be the kids that everyone else can't stand.

I think the big difference these days is that some people are really making a DECISION, not just following the other lemmings over the cliff.  Sounds like you've really thought it over and are going to make a great parent because your child was a choice that you went into with eyes wide open.  

Good luck to you!


----------



## plgrn

kennancat said:


> I suspect you all are actually the silent majority  Best of luck to you!





Liisa said:


> Good luck!!!  Please feel free to come back and keep us posted.  I, for one, will be curious as to how your life is going (in a pleasant, "yay! you got pregnant way")  That must be exciting for you to make that decision.  And I love that you thought about it for a long time before you made a decision.  Makes me think you'll be a good mommy (for examples of bad mommies - see link to the "other thread"!!!)





maddhatir said:


> ........... ............. .........
> 
> WoW! Please come back and check in with us and let us know how you are making out- just b/c you are going to the "otherside" doesn't mean we aren't going to miss you!! Congratulations and Good Luck!
> 
> I will see you on the freebie boards though- you can get a lot free baby stuff over there!





aclov said:


> Plgrn:    Best of luck to you!
> Hopefully, we'll still see you on the freebie board





druidia said:


> Plgrn:
> 
> I suspect that there are MANY people that would join you on that thread.   In my own quest along the fence, I've talked to co-workers and friends who were once blissfully CF and changed their minds.  They still hate all kids but their own.  Every single one of them feels like it's a totally different feeling when it is one's own child.
> I think the big difference these days is that some people are really making a DECISION, not just following the other lemmings over the cliff.  Sounds like you've really thought it over and are going to make a great parent because your child was a choice that you went into with eyes wide open.
> 
> Good luck to you!



See....the childfree are so tolerant, kind, and sensible. And ya'll get the bad rap for being bitter!     Hypothetically, if I had posted on the mommy boards how I had decided to stop trying for a baby get my tubes tied there would have been a judgmental uproar about fertility treatments, adoption, you name it! 

I'll still be lurking to see what you guys are up to and chime in when I need a sanity break from the loony "other side." 

PS. Mom and I went to Babies-R-Us to look at jogging strollers and I said "Hey! Let's get the biggest one, take it to Disney, wait until the bus comes to a complete stop until I even take the baby out, then make everyone in line wait for me to get my rear in gear before they can board the bus. Then I'll take up four seats---one for me, one for the kid, and two for the stroller to park in front of."  That is if the stroller is still functional after a full down of plowing people down with it.  

See you guys on the freebie boards!

Jenn


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> PS. Mom and I went to Babies-R-Us to look at jogging strollers and I said "Hey! Let's get the biggest one, take it to Disney, wait until the bus comes to a complete stop until I even take the baby out, then make everyone in line wait for me to get my rear in gear before they can board the bus. Then I'll take up four seats---one for me, one for the kid, and two for the stroller to park in front of."  That is if the stroller is still functional after a full down of plowing people down with it.
> 
> See you guys on the freebie boards!
> Jenn


----------



## Chris Rex

Hixski said:


> Thanks Liisa, I was just about to post this link and say "HELP".
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1478705&page=2



Thank you so much for the heads up on this thread.

Best thread I've seen. Ever.

ps- Hello everyone! Been away for a short bit...


----------



## Liisa

Chris Rex said:


> Thank you so much for the heads up on this thread.
> 
> Best thread I've seen. Ever.
> 
> ps- Hello everyone! Been away for a short bit...



I was wondering where you went!  

Yup, that thread is pretty entertaining.


----------



## blondeheroine

*peeps out*

A little bird told me this was where the cool kids hang out. 

I've been entrenched in that "other" thread y'all have been discussing.....


----------



## maddhatir

blondeheroine said:


> *peeps out*
> 
> A little bird told me this was where the cool kids hang out.
> 
> I've been entrenched in that "other" thread y'all have been discussing.....


----------



## Liisa

blondeheroine said:


> *peeps out*
> 
> A little bird told me this was where the cool kids hang out.



I've noticed a few people over there that need to come over here.  Maybe we should post a general invite?  (hmmm, on second thought, that may attract the "wrong" people)   

Blondeheroine, welcome to our club!  We *are* a fun group!!!   (just ignore what other people are saying about us (we do)!!!    


Besides, we always welcome people who have Pirates in their avatar!!!  Yo, ho!


----------



## Hixski

blondeheroine said:


> *peeps out*
> 
> A little bird told me this was where the cool kids hang out.
> 
> I've been entrenched in that "other" thread y'all have been discussing.....



Yes, it is cool here on the dark side.


----------



## kennancat

Liisa said:


> I've noticed a few people over there that need to come over here.  Maybe we should post a general invite?  (hmmm, on second thought, that may attract the "wrong" people)


Could always send the good ones a PM


----------



## aclov

plgrn said:


> Hypothetically, if I had posted on the mommy boards how I had decided to stop trying for a baby get my tubes tied there would have been a judgmental uproar about fertility treatments, adoption, you name it!



This is so true - people always have something to say!  DH and I have been married for 7 years and people will ask why we don't have kids  When I tell them we've been trying they usually ask if we've gone to the doctor.   When I tell them "YES!" or that I've had 2 IVF's, than they suggest adoption.   When I tell them adoption is expensive or DH really doesn't want to adopt, than they suggest foster care or usually just say "Oh"     Not one person, except for my Dad, has ever said to lead a child-free life.   My dad is the only one that has said "I know you want children but alot of people choose not to have any, don't feel pressured, and it's okay if you don't have kids"    And I know he's not saying it to make me feel better but he does believe that.


----------



## aclov

Hixski said:


> Yes, it is cool here on the dark side.



I'm at work so I only read some of the posts but some of them had me cracking up    I'll need to read more of that thread later....


----------



## blondeheroine

Liisa said:


> I've noticed a few people over there that need to come over here.  Maybe we should post a general invite?  (hmmm, on second thought, that may attract the "wrong" people)
> 
> Blondeheroine, welcome to our club!  We *are* a fun group!!!   (just ignore what other people are saying about us (we do)!!!
> 
> 
> Besides, we always welcome people who have Pirates in their avatar!!!  Yo, ho!



Thanks! After seeing some of those posts on the "other" thread, I have no doubt that you are a fun group.  



			
				Hixski said:
			
		

> Yes, it is cool here on the dark side.



Always did prefer Vader to Luke.


----------



## maddhatir

O-M-G you guys! 

I went grocery shopping by myself today- BIG shopping w/o DH- never again! I like when he goes, he bags everything, puts it in the car- carries it in the house and then helps put it away!

Ok- well that is not what I am OMG'ing-- While shopping I saw this poor woman ......she was about 5' 100 lbs, she had (2) carts and she was alone with (4!) of her kids- they were from about 3 to 7 and 2 of them were twins- 3 boys and one girl who was the oldest.

Anyway- I see them turning down the aisle I am getting ready to go down. I thought of this board- and the other thread that we have been hanging out on! Yes- the DIS pops in my head 100's of times a day!- It's crazy! 

I look at the little girl and she seems she just finished crying, they are all still walking and stop about half way down the aisle. 

So- mom decides she is gong to have a talk with the little girl to see what her brother did- I hear her saying- he punched me in the eye (her cheek WAS red) then the kids just go crazy! Mom is still trying to talk to the daughter and the boys are running around-- the littlest boy  starts picking up mini chocolate morsels off of the floor and eating them It was mayhem!

I was cracking up! There was an older woman right next to me who happened to know the mother- they were not together though. And she told the kid to stop eating off of the floor- she said the 5 second rule was over long ago-- the mom said are you sure about that b/c HE was the one who probably spilled the bag.

While the kid was eating off of the floor- the older woman looks at me and says- "OMG brings back memories, doesn't it?" Well I doubt if she meant, my own memories of _me_ eating off of the floor!  

So I said to her "no, not really- I don't have any kids-- I just think this is all hysterical!"

The poor mother had 2 carts and only one was half full- I have no idea how she thought she was going to get 2 shopping carts full of groceries with the way those kids were acting! 

I didn't see her the rest of my shopping trip. I don't know what happened.

I can't even imagine!!! All I was worried about was my cart was to heavy to push and I couldn't fit anything else in it!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> I've noticed a few people over there that need to come over here.  Maybe we should post a general invite?  (hmmm, on second thought, that may attract the "wrong" people)
> 
> Blondeheroine, welcome to our club!  We *are* a fun group!!!   (just ignore what other people are saying about us (we do)!!!
> 
> 
> Besides, we always welcome people who have Pirates in their avatar!!!  Yo, ho!



Well! We already had Momneedsavacay- or whatever her name is over here!

Remember it was a while back- I told her I was going to report her 

Everyone else over there doesn't seem so bad- but I guess you have to worry about the wackos who are lurking on that thread! Not the posters.


----------



## TXTurtle

I'm so thankful both my parents and DH2B's parents think that our decision to have or not have kids is just that - OUR decision.  It doesn't hurt that mom has more that a few friends who are suddenly stuck raising their grandkids and passing the stories on to her.  She's very happy not having that threat and, if she needs a small kid to spoil, borrows our second-cousin (I call him my nephew but it's not that direct of a relationship) and keeps him around until she remembers that she doesn't like small kids.    And he's an easy child!

I lead the children's program at my small church and a number of parisoners, in an attempt at small talk, try to tease me about how soon I'll have my own kid in the program.  So far I've managed to train my brain to interpret this to mean "we love you and think you'd make cute babies and are so inculturated in this culture of reproduction that we think that it's an appropriate topic of small talk" and so far it's worked.  It's when it's from family or close friends that it's hard.  

And yes, I've been following that aformentioned thread with popcorn in hand.  Love how some people assume that just because you have not yet entered into the bliss that is childraising that you automatically hate all children and that you are singling out their precious ones for an extra amount of scorn.  The only scary part is that there's no license for breeding - it's one thing to be immature and narrowminded, it's another thing to be raise a child in that environment!


----------



## blondeheroine

maddhatir said:


> Well! We already had Momneedsavacay- or whatever her name is over here!
> 
> Remember it was a while back- I told her I was going to report her
> 
> Everyone else over there doesn't seem so bad- but I guess you have to worry about the wackos who are lurking on that thread! Not the posters.



My sincere question is: why would someone who is obviously so entrenched in "mom culture" want to come into this thread at all and start an argument? Seems pointless to me.


----------



## Hixski

blondeheroine said:


> My sincere question is: why would someone who is obviously so entrenched in "mom culture" want to come into this thread at all and start an argument? Seems pointless to me.



You would think so.....

We have had some of the "others" come here to tell us all kinds of things. Mostly that we are wrong and will regret our decision. 

I think some of them are not so happy with their decision and want us to be in that club with them.


----------



## Liisa

Hixski said:


> You would think so.....
> 
> We have had some of the "others" come here to tell us all kinds of things. Mostly that we are wrong and will regret our decision.
> 
> I think some of them are not so happy with their decision and want us to be in that club with them.



Misery loves company!   

Yup, Maddhatir, now that you mention it, I remember when momneeds vacay (and boy, does she ever!) popped up over here.  Can't even imagine why she would read this thread?!!!  Just odd.


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Misery loves company!
> 
> Yup, Maddhatir, now that you mention it, I remember when momneeds vacay (and boy, does she ever!) popped up over here.  Can't even imagine why she would read this thread?!!!  Just odd.



You know what is REALLY weird- last year there was some kind of discussion on pro-choice or maybe it ended up turning into that ...I really do not want to start a discussion here about it- but I mentioned I was pro-choice. Well, this woman would NOT leave me alone! She kept telling me on the thread that she can "change my mind" I explained to her I am NOT an idiot- I do not need my mind changed- I understand fully what I believe in. I had to get off the htread b/c she was nuts!

WELL- she started PMing me!!!!! Telling me she is certain she can change my mind- I had to be a little rude to get her to stop stalking me!

I don't know WHY people insist on thinking they can change your mind about something that I have thought about long and hard- like I said, I am not a moron- I know what my choices are- I am sorry they are not YOUR choices!


----------



## ChisJo

maddhatir said:


> You know what is REALLY weird- last year there was some kind of discussion on pro-choice or maybe it ended up turning into that ...I really do not want to start a discussion here about it- but I mentioned I was pro-choice. Well, this woman would NOT leave me alone! She kept telling me on the thread that she can "change my mind" I explained to her I am NOT an idiot- I do not need my mind changed- I understand fully what I believe in. I had to get off the htread b/c she was nuts!
> 
> WELL- she started PMing me!!!!! Telling me she is certain she can change my mind- I had to be a little rude to get her to stop stalking me!
> 
> I don't know WHY people insist on thinking they can change your mind about something that I have thought about long and hard- like I said, I am not a moron- I know what my choices are- I am sorry they are not YOUR choices!



This kind of behaviour really IRRITATES the living **** out of me....It's also the same reason I refuse to talk to people who are insistant that I will change my mind about having kids, I'll regret it when I'm old, I'll be a lonely old woman, no - my nieces won't be there when I'm older, and I'm missing out on the best years of my life - blah blah blah....

Those people are irrational and rude....I just walk away, or firmly tell them it's MY decision, and to leave me alone. I actually stopped talking to one person at work because he was so insistent that I have kids that he drove me crazy. I actually had to tell him to shut up and leave me alone. We haven't talked since....like he's standing his ground - ok, because that's gonna make me change my mind! One less annoying person I have to deal with at work!!


----------



## Muushka

I have never had a strange PM or one that made me feel uncomfortable, but that would creep me out and force me to shut it off!  Oy!


----------



## Hixski

ChisJo said:


> This kind of behaviour really IRRITATES the living **** out of me....It's also the same reason I refuse to talk to people who are insistant that I will change my mind about having kids, I'll regret it when I'm old, I'll be a lonely old woman, no - my nieces won't be there when I'm older, and I'm missing out on the best years of my life - blah blah blah....
> 
> Those people are irrational and rude....I just walk away, or firmly tell them it's MY decision, and to leave me alone. I actually stopped talking to one person at work because he was so insistent that I have kids that he drove me crazy. I actually had to tell him to shut up and leave me alone. We haven't talked since....like he's standing his ground - ok, because that's gonna make me change my mind! One less annoying person I have to deal with at work!!



At 47 I just tell them I AM older and no still haven't changed my mind. You look happy in your pictures. But you must not be. The "others" can see it is all a front. You hate all the childfree things you can do and are just dying to be a mommyto.... RIGHT.....thats why we are all posting on a childfree thread. DH had someone he worked with that we would see from time to time. We have been married 21 yrs and she just recently got a clue that *NO * I guess they are really not going to have kids.


----------



## maddhatir

Just over on the other thread- seems like someone is pulling out the stick! 

See how long that lasts.


----------



## ChisJo

OMG!! I just got through the rest of the "other" thread, and I give props to Madhattir and Blondeheroine...you are my heroes!! Thanks for the laughs....


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Ok, so I'm stuck having to use the library's internet since something is wrong with mine and guess what I'm sitting next to.  Misbehaving children.  Seriously, one little boy and a girl.  The boy is hitting the girl.  Where are the child's parents?  They can't be more than 10 or 11.  Thank goodness time's up or I might have to go into evil teacher mode.


----------



## ChisJo

Mrs.Reese said:


> Ok, so I'm stuck having to use the library's internet since something is wrong with mine and guess what I'm sitting next to.  Misbehaving children.  Seriously, one little boy and a girl.  The boy is hitting the girl.  Where are the child's parents?  They can't be more than 10 or 11.  Thank goodness time's up or I might have to go into evil teacher mode.



Well, it's a good thing you are at the library....that's the most appropriate place for something like that to be happening. Not like people are there to study or enjoy the quietness that libraries are supposed to be. Honest to god, when I was a kid, if I would have peeped in a library, I would have been, uhm, taught a lesson.


----------



## blondeheroine

maddhatir said:


> Just over on the other thread- seems like someone is pulling out the stick!
> 
> See how long that lasts.



 I saw that.



			
				ChisJo said:
			
		

> OMG!! I just got through the rest of the "other" thread, and I give props to Madhattir and Blondeheroine...you are my heroes!! Thanks for the laughs...



*bows* I'll be here all week. Maybe.


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> OMG!! I just got through the rest of the "other" thread, and I give props to Madhattir and Blondeheroine...you are my heroes!! Thanks for the laughs....



just being....me.........


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> Just over on the other thread- seems like someone is pulling out the stick!


When I first read this, I thought you meant a stick as in "speak softly and carry a big stick", not an "olive branch" stick  It is nice to see that she's maybe realizing that other people enjoy the characters and parades, even if she doesn't.

As for why people come into this thread when they know they're only going to be offended  I won't name usernames publicly, but I did some searches on one of our other troll friends (back when the search feature still worked) and saw from her posts that she had two children with disabilities and was working on losing weight so she could fit the rides at Disney. She also took the opportunity to insult many other parents for the choices they made, including a thread where everyone turned on her after she stated that no good parent would let their kids ride Disney buses because there were no seatbelts on them. Clearly an unhappy individual who tried to make herself feel better by putting down everyone around her.


----------



## zima-cheryl

June 22nd - Take Your Dog To Work Day!  

How cool is that?  I'd take my Ginger, only I think she might not make it to my office w/out tossing her cookies (she doesn't do long car trips well).  Maybe I'll work from home that day & we can be at work together that way.

http://www.petsit.com/tydtwd/index.php?tp=VE1HUj0xLHRpZD0yOTc1NDMs


----------



## ChisJo

zima-cheryl said:


> June 22nd - Take Your Dog To Work Day!
> 
> How cool is that?  I'd take my Ginger, only I think she might not make it to my office w/out tossing her cookies (she doesn't do long car trips well).  Maybe I'll work from home that day & we can be at work together that way.
> 
> http://www.petsit.com/tydtwd/index.php?tp=VE1HUj0xLHRpZD0yOTc1NDMs



AWWW!! If only I didn't work in a hospital, I would be all over that, if I had a dog, that is...Do you think cats count??


----------



## kennancat

By the way, I've been doing some searching on the internet because I was curious to see if there were Christian childfree groups out there. I did find quite a few, as well as some really scary people - do a search on "Albert Mohler childfree" if you want to see what I mean. I found a thread on one set of message boards that just cracked me up and had to share. The thread title is "The Ethics of Child Free Couples", and here's how the entire first post:



> What are the ethics of child free couples? I personally believe it is unethical to be "child free". I believe it is selfish and frankly quite sickening. What are your opinions on child free couples?


 

Thought that was a great way to start off a discussion - no bias whatsoever in that post! Luckily there were many people on those boards to tell her that she was a nutbag, and there's even a whole section under the married couples board for the childfree.


----------



## TXTurtle

Cool, I'm unethical, selfish, and sick!  I feel quite accomplished!    Because, of course, the most ethical course one could take in life is producing as many souls as one can!

I remember back in college (I went to a fantastic Christian college) one engaged friend was researching birth control options and along with some good opinions she got some ... interesting ... ones.  One guy's arguement, while I don't remember the specifics, pretty much boiled down to the idea that every egg that wasn't fertilized was a sin.  I'm sure he meant that only within the context of marriage but logically ... apparently we college girls should have been far more active in order to avoid sin.  

And love the take your dog to work idea.  No dog at the moment but only b/c we're in a pet-free apartment.  So someday!  DH2B and I were looking at the local Sheltie rescue page this evening and it was physically painful to navigate away without picking one out to bring home.


----------



## Debi

Hi everybody!

Just a reminder that this thread needs to remain on-topic.  Public bashing, name-calling, or harrassing other posters will NOT be tolerated.

Now, back to the topic: Married couples choosing not to have kids.

Thank you for your cooperation.


----------



## maddhatir

Debi said:


> Hi everybody!
> 
> Just a reminder that this thread needs to remain on-topic.  Public bashing, name-calling, or harrassing other posters will NOT be tolerated.
> 
> Now, back to the topic: Married couples choosing not to have kids.
> 
> Thank you for your cooperation.




No disrespect- but then WHY are _they_ allowed to pop on and bash us!!

You can post your reminder here for us, that is fine- but where are you when we need to defend _ourselves_. And it has happend PLENTY of times in the past. You know those people are not going to find your reminder here! I would think that you should PM those who bash us and then wander back off to where they came from.


----------



## DISNEYDUET

TXTurtle said:


> Cool, I'm unethical, selfish, and sick!  I feel quite accomplished!    Because, of course, the most ethical course one could take in life is producing as many souls as one can!
> 
> I remember back in college (I went to a fantastic Christian college) one engaged friend was researching birth control options and along with some good opinions she got some ... interesting ... ones.  One guy's arguement, while I don't remember the specifics, pretty much boiled down to the idea that every egg that wasn't fertilized was a sin.  I'm sure he meant that only within the context of marriage but logically ... apparently we college girls should have been far more active in order to avoid sin.



I am with you! My father is a minister (Methodist) and I almost went to Liberty University in VA. We went to tour the campus and it reminded my of the Stepford Wives.  Creepy place! (and for anyone who went there, no offence! It was probably a good fit for you but just not me) 
I have plenty of friends who are Pro Life because their religion dictates it. I happen to be Pro Choice (I work in the OBGYN field) and my folks completely understand. I have a few medical issues that would make it very dangerous for me to have a child (think Steel Magnolias) and my husband doesn't want to take the risk of loosing me just to have a child.  Now, if only my     in-laws understood that! 

And I know this has probably been said but I hate people who question our going to Disney just because we don't have kids! As one of my favorite posters, Kay7979, has said "Silly people have more fun" and that is a rule that both DH and I live by! You are only as old as you feel and at Disney we feel 10 years old again!

Thanks for letting me get this out. It has been a long night spent in the hospital with my mother in law and now I am at work. With a long day ahead!


----------



## zima-cheryl

ChisJo said:


> AWWW!! If only I didn't work in a hospital, I would be all over that, if I had a dog, that is...Do you think cats count??



I didn't find anything for taking your cat to work.  

That would actually be better for me.  Our 3 kitties do the car better than our dog.  And all 3 are leash trained (it is for their own good...they wouldn't last 10 minutes on our road).  

The 3 of them would have a blast - of course I wouldn't get a lick of work done all day!


----------



## Poppinsme

I would have to take my horse to work day!   
But I don't think the hospital I work at would like that.


----------



## maddhatir

DISNEYDUET said:


> I am with you! My father is a minister (Methodist) and I almost went to Liberty University in VA. We went to tour the campus and it reminded my of the Stepford Wives.  Creepy place! (and for anyone who went there, no offence! It was probably a good fit for you but just not me)
> I have plenty of friends who are Pro Life because their religion dictates it. I happen to be Pro Choice (I work in the OBGYN field) and my folks completely understand. I have a few medical issues that would make it very dangerous for me to have a child (think Steel Magnolias) and my husband doesn't want to take the risk of loosing me just to have a child.  Now, if only my     in-laws understood that!
> 
> And I know this has probably been said but I hate people who question our going to Disney just because we don't have kids! As one of my favorite posters, Kay7979, has said "Silly people have more fun" and that is a rule that both DH and I live by! You are only as old as you feel and at Disney we feel 10 years old again!
> 
> Thanks for letting me get this out. It has been a long night spent in the hospital with my mother in law and now I am at work. With a long day ahead!



Hope all is well with you MIL!

My cousin went to Liberty U, he is from NJ- he is religious but does not act like the Stepford people of his church-- funny you call them that b/c that is what I have been calling them for YEARS! I don't go to church but I see them at some of the functions that his family has. 

They all have a glazed-eye look to them 

OMG- one time we went to his church- I think he is protestant??? Not sure, not that it matters- anyway- we went to watch a friend of ours kid get dedicated. Well at the time my DH had really long hair- the minster was doing his schpeel about people being saved and trying to get those to wanted to, to come up to the front of the church! I am telling you the music and the clapping went on WAYYYYY to long, people stopped coming up---, I KNOW he was waiting for DH to go up!!! I told DH... BOY! he had you targeted, he was just WAITING for you to come on up there and "save your soul" 

Funny thing is, DH and I do not go to church but we are more tolerant of people's choices etc than anyone in that church- I mentioned here a while back how one of my friends cried and she would pray for me when I told her I do not care if someone is gay 

ahhhh- yes! That was her church- she has now moved on to another church that is far more stranger!


----------



## LoveStitch626

Wow.. ya do a little work and the whole thread takes off like a rocket LOL. 

Plgrn, good luck with TTC. It can sometimes be a hard road and if ya need to talk or vent about it lemme know. We did that for quite some time before we said to heck with it. 

LOL I'm about to get my coffee and read the OTHER thread


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> No disrespect- but then WHY are _they_ allowed to pop on and bash us!!
> 
> You can post your reminder here for us, that is fine- but where are you when we need to defend _ourselves_. And it has happend PLENTY of times in the past. You know those people are not going to find your reminder here! I would think that you should PM those who bash us and then wander back off to where they came from.


 
Yeah, did I miss something? I feel like we're pretty well on topic right now. Okay, maybe not so much with "take your dog to work" day  I certainly don't feel like we're "public bashing, name-calling, or harassing other posters". Maybe in the past we haven't been too nice to some of the posters on this thread, but it's been out of self-defense.


----------



## zima-cheryl

kennancat said:


> Yeah, did I miss something? I feel like we're pretty well on topic right now. Okay, maybe not so much with "take your dog to work" day




Sorry - I'm still new at this (posting in general...not just the DIS board).  Didn't mean to get off topic & cause problems.   

I thought, based on all the pix of pets I've seen in past posts, folks might be interested.  I know our dog & cats are such a huge part of our lives, I loved the idea.

I'll get better at knowing what is/isn't okay to post as I do more.  Don't ever hesitate to tell me (nicely) when I'm off base, that is the only way I'll learn.


----------



## Hixski

zima-cheryl said:


> Sorry - I'm still new at this (posting in general...not just the DIS board).  Didn't mean to get off topic & cause problems.
> 
> I thought, based on all the pix of pets I've seen in past posts, folks might be interested.  I know our dog & cats are such a huge part of our lives, I loved the idea.
> 
> I'll get better at knowing what is/isn't okay to post as I do more.  Don't ever hesitate to tell me (nicely) when I'm off base, that is the only way I'll learn.



I don't think it was this. I think someone probably PM'd the mods and complained about us. It wouldn't be the first time I'm sure. We were all jumping on the other thread and I know of a couple of instances they said we were posting on another thread.


----------



## maddhatir

so of course WE get busted!

Like I said - no one has EVER come to OUR defense any other time. But now "others" need defending, and everyone is all over our thread  

We talk about everything from pets, to what we are doing for the weekend, vacations, landscaping! 

Give me a break! Maybe we should end every post with

......oh- BTW I am child-free and happy. Hows that for staying OT?


----------



## maddhatir

double post- sorry


----------



## HockeyKat

I'll get back on topic... I had to explain what DINK was today.


----------



## maddhatir

HockeyKat said:


> I'll get back on topic... I had to explain what DINK was today.




ahhh yes! I love being the other half of a DINK!


----------



## maddhatir

What is everyone's weekend plans???

I am going to to Stevie Nicks tonight. I am not a big fan of hers, but my SIL really wants to go- she has a babysitter, her DH will be fishing so DH and I (along with my other BIL and SIL) are going with her. Poor thing-- she is so excited! She doesn't get out much at night.

I saw her DH today and he asked me if I was excited-- I said-- "surely NOT as excited as your wife!" He said "I think she is just excited to get out of the house!" 

Chris Isaak is opening up for her-- now DH and I like him- we have seen him before in concert and he was terrific, cute, funny, sings good. 

More news on the concert front for Madd!

I am going to see Marilyn Manson and Slayer in Aug!!  I have always wanted to see Marilyn live! I got kind of crappy tix- off to the side and in the back- but my brother who is going with one of his friends- he got the CENTER section right behind the pit ROW A!!!!!!! SO- he said he will let me sit in his seats for Marilyn and then I can go back to my seats for Slayer! 

I just hope Marilyn doesn't sling "anything" out into the crowd! I have heard some stories!

I will fall down and scream "I'VE BEEN HIT!" 

Tix also go on sale for KORN tomorrow morning- they are another band I would love to see, DH said he doesn't wanna go- It's the Family Values tour so there will be tons of bands- it's an all day , outdoor thing- so I think I would rather wait and see if they come to an arena in PA, just KORN and an opening band

I will be happy now with Mr Manson! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	





ooops! And there will be yard saling tomorrow morning! 
8am!!!! 

We got a bunch of us already gathering for NEXT Sat. There might be 10 of us yard saling freaks going! That's gonna be fun! The word is spreading!

Not sure about Sunday yet- DH and his brothers MIGHT take my MILs DBF out fishing on my BILs boat for Father's Day- I think there might be a huge flea market on Sunday- I will take mom- But that is up in the air right now.

Gotta go get ready for tonight- and got to make DH something to munch on for when he gets home so he can eat in the car while we boogie over to SILs house to scoop up everyone!


----------



## HockeyKat

Sounds like fun!  I love that rockin-out smilie.

My weekend plans are to do absolutely nothing.  I am so looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow and reading either in the chaise or out on the patio in a hammock.  Sunday I might get up off the couch and fold some laundry and maybe deal with some yardwork, but then again, maybe not.  

I checked out that Mohler thing that someone suggested to google... man that is definitely scary.  Unethical and immoral!  Personally, I think the decision to not add to the population is a very ethical one.  I was reading on wikipedia that if we continue at current fertility rates, we will be up to 44 billion people by 2100 from our current 6.4 billion.


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> What is everyone's weekend plans???
> 
> I am going to to Stevie Nicks tonight. I am not a big fan of hers, but my SIL really wants to go- she has a babysitter, her DH will be fishing so DH and I (along with my other BIL and SIL) are going with her. Poor thing-- she is so excited! She doesn't get out much at night.
> 
> I saw her DH today and he asked me if I was excited-- I said-- "surely NOT as excited as your wife!" He said "I think she is just excited to get out of the house!"
> 
> Chris Isaak is opening up for her-- now DH and I like him- we have seen him before in concert and he was terrific, cute, funny, sings good.
> 
> More news on the concert front for Madd!
> 
> I am going to see Marilyn Manson and Slayer in Aug!!  I have always wanted to see Marilyn live! I got kind of crappy tix- off to the side and in the back- but my brother who is going with one of his friends- he got the CENTER section right behind the pit ROW A!!!!!!! SO- he said he will let me sit in his seats for Marilyn and then I can go back to my seats for Slayer!
> 
> I just hope Marilyn doesn't sling "anything" out into the crowd! I have heard some stories!
> 
> I will fall down and scream "I'VE BEEN HIT!"
> 
> Tix also go on sale for KORN tomorrow morning- they are another band I would love to see, DH said he doesn't wanna go- It's the Family Values tour so there will be tons of bands- it's an all day , outdoor thing- so I think I would rather wait and see if they come to an arena in PA, just KORN and an opening band
> 
> I will be happy now with Mr Manson!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ooops! And there will be yard saling tomorrow morning!
> 8am!!!!
> 
> We got a bunch of us already gathering for NEXT Sat. There might be 10 of us yard saling freaks going! That's gonna be fun! The word is spreading!
> 
> Not sure about Sunday yet- DH and his brothers MIGHT take my MILs DBF out fishing on my BILs boat for Father's Day- I think there might be a huge flea market on Sunday- I will take mom- But that is up in the air right now.
> 
> Gotta go get ready for tonight- and got to make DH something to munch on for when he gets home so he can eat in the car while we boogie over to SILs house to scoop up everyone!



I swear you need to live closer to me! LMAO you'd be on your own for Manson though  I'm jealous though about getting to see Stevie. I've *really* only gotten into some of her stuff recently.. the few songs I like I REALLY like lol. 

It's our turn to cook for friends. Every weekend the group of us take turns on either Friday or Saturday night for our CF mini-group (within the bigger group lol). It's SUPER fun. Im making stuff out of last years F&W cookbook. We usually start grazing/drinking early.. cook as we go... drink as we go.. so by the time we're done with dessert we're pretty buzzed and ready to play cards. Tomorrow we'll probably be sewing (got the top done Hattir LOL) and just hanging out. Sunday dh is off so we're bathing the dog.. lounging around.. who knows hehe.


----------



## kennancat

zima-cheryl said:


> Sorry - I'm still new at this (posting in general...not just the DIS board).  Didn't mean to get off topic & cause problems.
> 
> I thought, based on all the pix of pets I've seen in past posts, folks might be interested.  I know our dog & cats are such a huge part of our lives, I loved the idea.
> 
> I'll get better at knowing what is/isn't okay to post as I do more.  Don't ever hesitate to tell me (nicely) when I'm off base, that is the only way I'll learn.


Don't worry - most of this thread tends to be "married no kids" -> tangent -> another tangent -> back to married w/o kids  I didn't mean to single you out or chastise you at all; I just didn't want to say that we were on topic and leave it open for someone to point out that we weren't.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

maddhatir said:


> ahhh yes! I love being the other half of a DINK!



Better than being a NIMK.



I am cleaning. I threw away two boxes of old magazines and got two garbage bags of clothes to donate. I'm feeling good about that!

Since you were discussing childfree Christian couples, I thought it might be closely related to a question I have. Is there a Biblical basis for the Fund. Mormon's belief in polygamy and having so many kids? 

Also - someone was mentioning it being a sin to "waste" eggs - wouldn't that mean a girl would have to get pregnant at her first period to not waste any? Talk about not making sense!

Anyway, we will be seeing characters in WDW, just the two of us and loving it!


----------



## kennancat

LuluLovesDisney said:


> Is there a Biblical basis for the Fund. Mormon's belief in polygamy and having so many kids?


Okay, I'm not Mormon, so my information comes entirely from knowing several people who tried out Mormonism and watching the PBS special on it last month  I believe most of it comes from the Mormon Bible, not the traditional Christian Bible. According to the special, Joseph Smith claimed that God revealed to him that he needed to take plural wives like Abraham and other men in the Old Testament. The mainstream Mormon church formally abolished the practice sometime in the 1800s (conveniently around the time that Utah was trying to gain statehood), but turned a blind eye to it for a while. At some point in the 1900s the church really started cracking down on it and excommunicating believers. You still have the fundamentalists who practice it and argue that they're the true Mormon church because Joseph Smith started this and the church got rid of it for practical reasons, not because God said to.

After watching that special, DH brought up what I thought was a really great point - what happens to all the extra men? Figure that the birth rate is typically biased towards males, but by the time we reach reproductive age, the ratio is around 1:1. So, if one man marries two women, then that means some guy is left without a wife. I guess you could assume that the men marry later than the women (so more have died off and the ratio is now biased towards the women) or maybe the practice started when they were low on men. But bottom line as I see it is that in modern times, the math doesn't work out to make polygamy a good choice.


----------



## Liisa

ChisJo said:


> I'm missing out on the best years of my life - blah blah blah....




Sorry to be jumping back a few posts.  Work got in the way...  But this made me laugh.  Hmmmm, if you ask me and DH, THESE are the best years of our life!!!!   But I guess that goes back to the root of the problem, some people with kids can't imagine how wonderful a quiet life can be.  The nice dinners, the travelling, the random "get up and go"...


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> What is everyone's weekend plans???



Last night we went and saw "Ocean's 13".  If you liked 11 & 12, I would recommend you see 13.  Fun movie, plus George & Brad aren't too hard on the eyes.  And of course had to get the bag of sweedish fish.   

Tonight I'm making DH take me to "Midsummer Night's Dream".  He is a good sport about going.  He knows how much I enjoy Shakespeare (it is the English Lit. major in me).  

Tomorrow we are taking my father-in-law out for Father's Day.  And then if the weather holds I'll spend the rest of the day working in my yard.  I'm slowly trying to get a new flower bed put in.  Think I'll be going to the nursery to pick up some daisy & yarrow plants.


----------



## Liisa

My weekend... bathed the dogs, cleaned the house, tended to the yard, vacuumed the pool (new pool, we haven't used it, but the dogs have.  Needs to warm up a bit for me...)  Tonight we are going out to dinner to celebrate our anniversary.  Tomorrow I have to pack.  We are heading down to Tampa next week for my brother's wedding (hence all the chores being crammed into this weekend).  We don't have time to squeeze in a trip to Disney which is just about killing me (1 hour away and we're not going!  )

By the way, we're DINK's.  But I'm hoping that someday DH will enable us to be OINK's!!!


----------



## Hixski

We are finishing some remodeling we are doing this weekend. Nothing special. We are having pasta con broccoli with a bottle of wine for dinner tonight. Yumm. Tuesday we have ball tickets to the St. Louis Cardinals game. We will probably have a few beers somewhere tomorrow sometime. Just a typical childfree weekend.


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> By the way, we're DINK's.  But I'm hoping that someday DH will enable us to be OINK's!!!



  OINKS!  

weeeeeee--oooooooo ( I just got a vision of Deliverance!   )


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> OINKS!
> 
> weeeeeee--oooooooo ( I just got a vision of Deliverance!   )



   

DH and want to be LINKS. Lottery income no kids!!!!!


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> I swear you need to live closer to me! LMAO you'd be on your own for Manson though  I'm jealous though about getting to see Stevie. I've *really* only gotten into some of her stuff recently.. the few songs I like I REALLY like lol.
> 
> It's our turn to cook for friends. Every weekend the group of us take turns on either Friday or Saturday night for our CF mini-group (within the bigger group lol). It's SUPER fun. Im making stuff out of last years F&W cookbook. We usually start grazing/drinking early.. cook as we go... drink as we go.. so by the time we're done with dessert we're pretty buzzed and ready to play cards. Tomorrow we'll probably be sewing (got the top done Hattir LOL) and just hanging out. Sunday dh is off so we're bathing the dog.. lounging around.. who knows hehe.



Stevie was OK- her voice, I admit is still incredible- she sounds perfect- but even after the show- I had no desire to go and buy a CD. I did enjoy hearing her sing.

We all had a nice time- We had lawn tickets so we all brought our blankets to sit on. It was a bit chilly, BIL had the sheet thrown over him- he looked like he was ready for bed 

Speaking of dessert- I bought these adorable dessert plates and mugs today at one of the yardsales- they come 4 in a set and they are in round boxes, I usually see them in the department stores- they have pics of desserts on both the plates and mugs. Never used!! 6 bucks for both sets. 

And LS626- you would be proud of me- I _bought_ a patch today, but that is as close as I get to sewing- just "buying" the patch!  I will have my tailor sew it onto my jeans It's some kind of military patch I bought from a guy at a flea market, he had a bunch of old military stuff- I have a little hole in the knee of my jeans. So I will slap it on and look cool Funny, I have a few jeans that I bought WITH the holes already in them- but I buy a patch to COVER a hole that popped up in another pair.  

Dinner shounds fun! We usually end up playing UNO when we have a bunch of people over- 

 + + *UNO*=  

It NEVER fails- I am ALWAYS the one who says "who's turn is it" and EVERYONE yells at me "YOURS!" 

 "What? settle down, now what color is the card?"


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> DH and want to be LINKS. Lottery income no kids!!!!!



OINK, LINK- I like the sounds of both- I hate working! 

Now NIMK- No...thank...you.......but funny how there are many people all around that love to "choose" this lovely lifestyle!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> My weekend... bathed the dogs, cleaned the house, tended to the yard, vacuumed the pool (new pool, we haven't used it, but the dogs have.  Needs to warm up a bit for me...)  Tonight we are going out to dinner to celebrate our anniversary.  Tomorrow I have to pack.  We are heading down to Tampa next week for my brother's wedding (hence all the chores being crammed into this weekend).  We don't have time to squeeze in a trip to Disney which is just about killing me (1 hour away and we're not going!  )
> 
> By the way, we're DINK's.  But I'm hoping that someday DH will enable us to be OINK's!!!



*HAPPY ANIVERSARY!!!!!!*




OH! and PLEASE have a glass of champagne on me!....ummm....FOR me! 

I am so excited! I LOVE champagne- I was just telling DH he has to bring me to a new place that opened near us--- it is a CHAMPAGNE BAR!!!! It is called.... Swanky Bubbles! How awesome is that name! I will be there all the time just to be sure I get to try every single champage cocktail on their menu!


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> Stevie was OK- her voice, I admit is still incredible- she sounds perfect- but even after the show- I had no desire to go and buy a CD. I did enjoy hearing her sing.
> 
> We all had a nice time- We had lawn tickets so we all brought our blankets to sit on. It was a bit chilly, BIL had the sheet thrown over him- he looked like he was ready for bed
> 
> Speaking of dessert- I bought these adorable dessert plates and mugs today at one of the yardsales- they come 4 in a set and they are in round boxes, I usually see them in the department stores- they have pics of desserts on both the plates and mugs. Never used!! 6 bucks for both sets.
> 
> And LS626- you would be proud of me- I _bought_ a patch today, but that is as close as I get to sewing- just "buying" the patch!  I will have my tailor sew it onto my jeans It's some kind of military patch I bought from a guy at a flea market, he had a bunch of old military stuff- I have a little hole in the knee of my jeans. So I will slap it on and look cool Funny, I have a few jeans that I bought WITH the holes already in them- but I buy a patch to COVER a hole that popped up in another pair.
> 
> Dinner shounds fun! We usually end up playing UNO when we have a bunch of people over-
> 
> + + *UNO*=
> 
> It NEVER fails- I am ALWAYS the one who says "who's turn is it" and EVERYONE yells at me "YOURS!"
> 
> "What? settle down, now what color is the card?"



 LMAO dude. I just wear the holes in my jeans. Ventilation baybeee  Dinner was fun. Pierogies flopped but dessert was GOOD. We haven't played UNO in forever. LOL I may bust out the cards next week. I'm always that person too. Except I've usually been    and it usually goes more like "Who's turn is it?" YOURS " "** off! I'm goin I'm goin.. What color are we at? *giggle & look at cards* What color do you have? *looking over neighbor's shoulder* Hey gimme that red 2"


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> looking over neighbor's shoulder* Hey gimme that red 2"



HUH! No way man- No cheatin'! 

 I am such a dork- If I can see my neighbors cards- I yell at them 

But then again- it's not like I am going to _remember_ what the heck they even have after I turn my head back to my hand!


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> HUH! No way man- No cheatin'!
> 
> I am such a dork- If I can see my neighbors cards- I yell at them
> 
> But then again- it's not like I am going to _remember_ what the heck they even have after I turn my head back to my hand!



 me too! i have THE worst memory in the world no matter what. I'm jealous of dh who can actually count cards! we've got another game we play sort of like hearts... i can barely remember what high cards went out lol


----------



## kennancat

maddhatir said:


> Dinner shounds fun! We usually end up playing UNO when we have a bunch of people over


We love UNO too! Haven't played in a while though. DH always seems to not have the card he needs and then has to pick up half the deck. A couple of year ago, we nicknamed him "long draw" 

P.S. Cool - I think we're going to hit page 100 soon!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> *HAPPY ANIVERSARY!!!!!!*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> OH! and PLEASE have a glass of champagne on me!....ummm....FOR me!
> 
> I am so excited! I LOVE champagne- I was just telling DH he has to bring me to a new place that opened near us--- it is a CHAMPAGNE BAR!!!! It is called.... Swanky Bubbles! How awesome is that name! I will be there all the time just to be sure I get to try every single champage cocktail on their menu!



Have you ever tried strawberry champagne soup?  YUMMY!!

We are in strawberry picking season right now & I can't wait to make up a batch w/fresh berries.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Have you ever tried strawberry champagne soup?  YUMMY!!
> 
> We are in strawberry picking season right now & I can't wait to make up a batch w/fresh berries.



No I haven't!!! I have never been a soup person- cold or hot. DH would probably LOVE it!

And if the soup has champagne in it- and there is no possibility of getting a buzz- I will pass it up!


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> We love UNO too! Haven't played in a while though. DH always seems to not have the card he needs and then has to pick up half the deck. A couple of year ago, we nicknamed him "long draw"
> 
> P.S. Cool - I think we're going to hit page 100 soon!



How great is it when you have 3 people in a row throw down "draw 4" cards! that 4th person is PISSED! 

My DH can remember cards also- he remembers what people pick up and if they still have it etc. Me? I am lucky I remember the game is still going


----------



## maddhatir

BTW- I did a search for the Oneida dessert plates and mugs that I got for 3 bucks a piece- On Amazon they are selling the plates for 15$ and the mugs for 17$ !!!

I asked the woman selling them if she woud take 5 for both and she said no, they have never been used- if she didn't sell them she was going to out them in a "raffle basket" for the church. hmmmm- now I wonder if she is going to donate my 6 bucks to her church!? 

Here they are- I love them


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> BTW- I did a search for the Oneida dessert plates and mugs that I got for 3 bucks a piece- On Amazon they are selling the plates for 15$ and the mugs for 17$ !!!
> 
> I asked the woman selling them if she woud take 5 for both and she said no, they have never been used- if she didn't sell them she was going to out them in a "raffle basket" for the church. hmmmm- now I wonder if she is going to donate my 6 bucks to her church!?
> 
> Here they are- I love them




Good deal!!! Don't you love when you find something and then you find out just what a great find it was.


We hit 100 pages!!!!!   

I guess there are just too many of us out here.  

Here's to 100 more.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Good deal!!! Don't you love when you find something and then you find out just what a great find it was.
> 
> 
> We hit 100 pages!!!!!
> 
> I guess there are just too many of us out here.
> 
> Here's to 100 more.



_*Here's to 100!!! and 100s more*_
...and there can _never_ be too many of US!


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> BTW- I did a search for the Oneida dessert plates and mugs that I got for 3 bucks a piece- On Amazon they are selling the plates for 15$ and the mugs for 17$ !!!
> 
> I asked the woman selling them if she woud take 5 for both and she said no, they have never been used- if she didn't sell them she was going to out them in a "raffle basket" for the church. hmmmm- now I wonder if she is going to donate my 6 bucks to her church!?
> 
> Here they are- I love them




Those are TOO cool!


----------



## maddhatir

I guess I can say Happy Father's day to a few of the guys on the thread-- b/c they ARE daddy's to their fur babies! or any of their pets that do not contain fur!


----------



## maddhatir

Well my weekend will be extended a day- I took Monday off. 

Me and mom are meeting my cousin who lives down the Jersey Shore at her house in Avalon.

We are all going to jump on the Cape May ferry and head over to the Delaware outlets! When you get off the ferry, they have shuttles that take you to the outlets.

So, we will shop, shop, shop some more, do lunch, maybe finish up shopping, jump back on the shuttle to the ferry and cruise on back to Cape May!


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Dude, I so want some of those plates.


----------



## Liisa

Mrs.Reese said:


> Dude, I so want some of those plates.




Me too!!!  Those plates are really cool!  Thanks for the Anniversary wishes.  Dinner was great... it was a gorgeous night so we ate out on the patio of the restaurant.  Food was delicious... the wait staff, not terrific.  He had a huge party he was tending to and we were kind of an afterthought.  Oh, well.  It was still pleasant.  

Hatir - where do you get your smilies from?  I LOVE them!!!  

One more day of work for me and then I'm leaving (on a jet plane     couldn't resist) for Tampa.  Not quite a vacation, I've already been in an argument with the Mother of the bride (looonngg story, the woman drives me nuts).  Good thing she's not MY MIL.  My brother has a temper that is much worse than mine, so I'm just waiting for the day he blows.     And she's already pushing for kids - last comment I heard was that she was hoping her daughter would get pregnant on the wedding night...  UGH!


----------



## ChisJo

Liisa said:


> And she's already pushing for kids - last comment I heard was that she was hoping her daughter would get pregnant on the wedding night...  UGH!



That is not cool....that is actually the reason my soon to be DH and myself specifically told both our parents not to expect any kids from us. I ended up almost getting into an argument with my BIL last night because he just can't understand why we wouldn't want kids....I had to stop and tell him I didn't want to argue about it on Fathers day, and to drop it. My mom is still on the hopes that we will change our mind, but I've been pretty blunt about this my whole life. She sais if we don't, that is completely our decision and she is totally respecting that, as is my DH's parents. My father is pretty old fashioned, and he is having a hard time understanding it (since married people are supposed to have kids, well, in his mind anyways), but he keeps his mouth pretty shut....besides, they already have 9 grandchildren, and 2 of my siblings are trying again right now, so I doubt that they would miss any from me.


----------



## Liisa

ChisJo said:


> That is not cool....that is actually the reason my soon to be DH and myself specifically told both our parents not to expect any kids from us.



The worst part is... my brother and his soon to be wife WANT kids!  So all this woman needs to do is to sit back and be patient.  When they are ready, hopefully, it will happen.  Why the pressure?   

I guess she's lucky she doesn't have me for a daughter.  I don't think my life choice would "work" for her!


----------



## ChisJo

Liisa said:


> The worst part is... my brother and his soon to be wife WANT kids!  So all this woman needs to do is to sit back and be patient.  When they are ready, hopefully, it will happen.  Why the pressure?
> 
> I guess she's lucky she doesn't have me for a daughter.  I don't think my life choice would "work" for her!



She would probably knit you booties and hang stockings at Christmas for your future child with the hopes that you would get the message that she wants grandchildren


----------



## Hixski

ChisJo said:


> That is not cool....that is actually the reason my soon to be DH and myself specifically told both our parents not to expect any kids from us. I ended up almost getting into an argument with my BIL last night because he just can't understand why we wouldn't want kids....I had to stop and tell him I didn't want to argue about it on Fathers day, and to drop it. My mom is still on the hopes that we will change our mind, but I've been pretty blunt about this my whole life. She sais if we don't, that is completely our decision and she is totally respecting that, as is my DH's parents. My father is pretty old fashioned, and he is having a hard time understanding it (since married people are supposed to have kids, well, in his mind anyways), but he keeps his mouth pretty shut....besides, they already have 9 grandchildren, and 2 of my siblings are trying again right now, so I doubt that they would miss any from me.



I am 47. My MIL is going to be 93  next month God love her. She has 7 children. 16 grandchildren, 7 great grandchildren and 3 great great grandchildren. Thankfully she does not care if DH and I have any kids. On a more humorous side DH has a brother that has been married 4 times with numerous girlfriends and is childfree also. Thankfully there are parents out there like this. I don't want to even go into my parents. They don't have grandchildren and it looks like they won't. Of course that is all my fault and no fault lies with my brother in that area.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Thought yall would like to see this article

http://www.nbc11.com/news/13509438/detail.html


----------



## mzliza3

Krissalee said:


> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!


If you don't want to have kids, that's YOUR business & people should just mind their own business! My sister & her husband decided very early on they don't want kids & some of the rude & presumptuous comments they get are unbelievable. Selfish? NO! Honest, realistic, YES! Some people just aren't cut out to be parents; they have other goals they want to pursue in their lives. Deciding not to be a parent doesn't make you a bad person, a selfish person, or a weird person (my sister always gets the "people who don't have/want kids are weird" comment). It's your life, & if you're happy with your choice, then you don't owe anybody any explainations.


----------



## maddhatir

Mrs.Reese said:


> Dude, I so want some of those plates.



How cool is this? I checked ebay and they have a 4 pc dish set-- WITH a cake plate and a server!

http://cgi.ebay.com/ONEIDA-SWEETS-S...ryZ36032QQrdZ1QQssPageNameZWD1VQQcmdZViewItem


----------



## Liisa

Heading out tomorrow for Tampa.  DH called me at work today and said "so, just how long a drive is it from Tampa to Orlando?"  20 minutes later, I had a rental car booked and directions from our Tampa hotel to the Magic Kingdom...  I'm GOING TO DISNEY WORLD!!!!     It's only for the day on Saturday, but heck... I'm excited!

Don't do anything too exciting - or get this thread closed while I'm gone!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Heading out tomorrow for Tampa.  DH called me at work today and said "so, just how long a drive is it from Tampa to Orlando?"  20 minutes later, I had a rental car booked and directions from our Tampa hotel to the Magic Kingdom...  I'm GOING TO DISNEY WORLD!!!!     It's only for the day on Saturday, but heck... I'm excited!
> 
> Don't do anything too exciting - or get this thread closed while I'm gone!



   Enjoy!!!!!


----------



## kennancat

HockeyKat said:


> Oh BTW... I am looking for a new, more permanent form of birth control.  I am currently on Yasmin and have no problems with it, but I would like something I didn't have to refill often and take daily.  My insurance covers birth control other than the pill 100%.  Any suggestions?   I would love to have my tubes tied but at 31, healthy, married, no doctor would do it.


Bringing this one back up again - I had my annual today with a new gyno (just switched) and she suggested the Mirena IUD as another possible method. She said it has a lot of the advantages of Depo (the lack of periods) without a lot of the side effects. I had not heard of it, but thought you might be interested.


----------



## mzliza3

HockeyKat said:


> Hahahah!!
> 
> I am actually rather lucky in this regard, as I chose a technical profession with almost no women in my department, at this job or any of the 8 I have had in the past 10 years (yeah, not exactly a STABLE profession!).  Most of the men are from other countries and/or have SAHM as wives.
> 
> My boss does have kids but they are teenagers, and he is a workaholic anyhow, so the thought of leaving at 2PM is NOT acceptable in my department.   I have actually never worked in a place where they put any emphasis on family time... I guess when you get into tech you know that the hours can be long/wonky.
> 
> Both my job and my husband's job penalize families way more than singles for health care.  Employee only for me is free, and for him is $80/month... Family for my company is $200+, and same for him.
> 
> I do offer to take weekend time and holidays, since my DH is in retail and we can never take traditional vacations.   Summer, Christmas, spring break is the LAST time I would want to take vacation anyhow... too many kids, too many people.  I don't really like family holidays anymore... we wind up relegated to the kids table w/ siblings, cousins, and their babies, talking about diaper wipes and potty training.
> 
> Maybe I *am* bitter.
> 
> Oh BTW... I am looking for a new, more permanent form of birth control.  I am currently on Yasmin and have no problems with it, but I would like something I didn't have to refill often and take daily.  My insurance covers birth control other than the pill 100%.  Any suggestions?   I would love to have my tubes tied but at 31, healthy, married, no doctor would do it.


No doctor would do your ligation?! I'm a nurse practioner & to my knowledge (at least here in PA, might be different in NC), if that procedure is what the patient wants, then the doctor should at least refer you to a doctor who will do it. Heard nothing but good things about Essure. Just wondering, if the husband went to the doctor & requested a vasectomy, would he get the same treatment (i.e. be refused cos he didn't already have children)?


----------



## HockeyKat

I doubt they would refuse my husband, although I have heard that they would require me to sign a waiver (which I would do gladly!!).

I haven't checked in a few years, maybe now they would since I am over 30.  Sure wouldn't in my 20s!

I will look into the IUD... I thought I was due for my annual in July and it turns out it is Nov, so I have a few more mos to think about it.  Thanks for the tips!


----------



## mzliza3

Good luck! I never knew some laws could be so invasive... Your recent postings just gave me some wonderful ideas for the nursing ethics class I'll be teaching in the fall- thanks!


----------



## ChisJo

kennancat said:


> Bringing this one back up again - I had my annual today with a new gyno (just switched) and she suggested the Mirena IUD as another possible method. She said it has a lot of the advantages of Depo (the lack of periods) without a lot of the side effects. I had not heard of it, but thought you might be interested.



I'm on it- have been for about 3 months. Agree with the doctor about the advantages....I have zero problems with it. I have a problem with large amount of hormones entering the body, and the Mirena doesn't seem to affect me at all, since it's goal is to release a minimal amount of hormones, triggering that area alone.  The only disadvantage I can think of is that before I had it inserted, my periods were only 2 days long (I know, tragedy) but very painful. Now, they are 7 days long, less painful and way lighter (almost more like a spotting for 7 days). Eventually, I hear they are supposed to get milder - trust me, if they don't, I may take it out....2 days to 7 days doesn't exactly make me happy. Oh - and they are still very irregular right now....more frequent then they used to be...

When I got it inserted, it was uncomfortable to say the least. I didn't really notice it that day, but the next day - ouch. I could feel it and it felt terrible!! I couldn't walk because of the uncomfortableness and I ended up having to call in sick to work because I was crying so much. The only thing that helped was a warm bath. But, I haven't had any problems since!!

You have to check the string placement every month....If the strings aren't there, there could be accidents. I am super paranoid about getting pregnant and have had them checked by my family physician every month since - but, you can apparently do it yourself. I personally cannot feel them and have had my BF check for them - it's not his favorite time of the month, but he knows if they aren't there, we may have little ones, and he would rather check then have that. Also, the strings are metal like, and sometimes, depending on the "position" we are in, he can feel them poke him, so I know they are there.

The cost is reasonable considering you only need to replace the unit every 5 years. I have medical insurance that covers 80% of prescriptions and I only paid $69 - The gyne that put it in was certified to do it (not all of them are, so be careful) and he did it for free. So, considering that I don't have to worry about pills, condoms, etc, I am happy with this choice. I was on the depo shot for a long time, and have learned a lesson. With this Mirena, I take calcium every day as it may eventually cease my menstruation (your periods help to absorb calcium and store it for later so you don't get osteoporosis, just a little FYI).

All in all, I recommend it - I haven't really read too much negative on it. I don't know if the search engine here is still down, but search on here and there are lots of threads about it if you are interested. Search google as well and look up the Mirena website - of course they are going to be biased on their product, but it is a very informative site.


----------



## LoveStitch626

kennancat said:


> Bringing this one back up again - I had my annual today with a new gyno (just switched) and she suggested the Mirena IUD as another possible method. She said it has a lot of the advantages of Depo (the lack of periods) without a lot of the side effects. I had not heard of it, but thought you might be interested.



I've been meaning to respond to your post for a little while now. I really wouldn't advise getting on Depo. That was the first form of BC I was ever on out of high school up until a couple years later. I never had a problem on it. Now.. about 10 years and a lot of weight later, I've had some weird problems with it. I got it in August of last year so I wouldn't get my period during our October trip. I spotted pretty much constantly (daily) up until about oh November or December and then everything just dried up (as it should've been months ago). Now.. it's nearly the end of June and I **just barely** got my period back. It's been a normal length period, but I was pretty miserable the first day. Knowing there are other alternatives out there that can have the same benefits of Depo (no period) I'd REALLY go with one of those over the shot. Just my 2 cents/personal experience there for you to think about.


----------



## kennancat

LoveStitch626 said:


> I've been meaning to respond to your post for a little while now. I really wouldn't advise getting on Depo.


I've actually already been on it for about 4 and a half years, but I'm ready to try something different. The whole calcium thing concerns me. The new gyno said she doesn't feel like I need another bone scan and since my last one was okay, I should regain any loss I've had over the last couple of years, which makes me feel better. As far as side effects go, I don't feel like I can say Depo makes me gain weight and makes me more depressed, but I can't say it doesn't do that, KWIM? I did get down to my goal weight on WW a couple of years ago, so I know I can lose the weight on it. However, if it is affecting my moods, then that makes it harder to stick to good habits (e.g. fewer baked goods and more treadmill time)  I'm just ready to figure out what I'm like when I'm not on it.


----------



## zima-cheryl

kennancat said:


> I'm just ready to figure out what I'm like when I'm not on it.



That says it all!!

I've been on something (pill, depo) for almost 20 years.  This is my first "normal" month after having the essure done and I have no idea what to expect.  

I do know I am sooooo happy not to be pumping all those hormones & drugs into my body any more!


----------



## TXTurtle

Chrisjo - thanks for the personal testimonial about mirana.  I'm going in next week to get it put in and I'm nervous about the whole having something inside me part but compared to the alternatives .... at least the hormone dose is low and I love the supposed lack of periods.  I tend to go down hard for a full day despite pain meds so it would be wonderful to miss that part.  Sigh.  Am I the only woman who began wishing for menopause after my second period?


----------



## HockeyKat

TX, NO!! You certainly aren't. 

I did a Pill-free month a few years back when I was trying to determine if it was causing a lack of libido.  As it turns out, it wasn't, it was a lack of desire for my ex-fiance....  

But anyhow, I immediately remembered another reason why I pump hormones into my body:  Pain-free TOM.  It had been long enough that I had almost forgotten what it was like to be curled into a fetal position wishing I would just die already.

I am not sure about Mirena.  That whole string-checking thing kinda squicks me out, and the fact that they don't really know why it works is a bit frightening.  Depo is totally out, I don't want to stop being relieved every month, and I am very afraid of its side effects.


----------



## kennancat

zima-cheryl said:


> I do know I am sooooo happy not to be pumping all those hormones & drugs into my body any more!


I certainly wouldn't mind not having to take a regular pill, shot, etc., but I read something the other day that made me laugh. It was some message board (I think Yahoo answers in Australia) that came up as a result when I was searching for information about Mirena. The original post was asking for opinions on the product and somebody posted about "oh why do you want to fill your body with those chemicals, just use condoms". Uh yeah, hon. Can we review the failure rate of condoms again? 

Updated - Found the quote here: http://au.messages.yahoo.com/health/womens_health/143/



> I'm super biased, my body hates all chemicals - pills, implanon, strong pain killers etc.
> I think the world we live in is so toxic already with pestisides and irradiated foods and addidtives, why deliberately take in more chemicals? Every drug has side effects - Hormone drugs just so many more!
> The rates of infertility in the western (toxic) world are skyrocketting, and you only get one body. I know condoms really suck - but they are a relatively natural option.


----------



## Liisa

Thought you guys would enjoy this.  On our flight back from Tampa, I was thumbing through the Skymall magazine and found this quote:

"A father keeps pictures of his children in his wallet where his money used to be."      


Anyone got any good 4th of July plans?  We're hosting a party the Sunday after for some friends.  It stinks that the holiday falls right smack in the middle of the week!


----------



## ChisJo

Up in Canada, we celebrate our "independence day" on July 1....Every month, my DBF and me plan a special date-night, something more than just dinner and movie. We alternate months, and July just happens to fall in my month. We don't tell each other what we are planning, and we make an official date out of it....I am going to be picking him up (we live together) and taking him to our date. In our city, we have a historical park that will be hosting tons of events for Canada day, including an old car show, and you can have the chance to drive one. I know he will love that! Also, we are going to go and get an Antique photo done, among other things in the park....It is going to be so nice that day, and I am really excited. I hope he has a good time. For dinner, we are heading to the Mahogany room, the oldest bar in the city, and quite upscale too.....I'm sure he will very much enjoy himself there as well. Then, I booked a hotel room for the night that's located right in the park, so our window will be overlooking the "1905 street", room complete with a jacuzzi. I cannot wait....


----------



## Hixski

Our 4th plans are very boring. DH and I are both working. I am in IT so since we cover 24/7 and Wednesday is one of my days......I get to work. Don't feel sorry for me though. There won't be a darn thing going on. I will watch a movie or 2 on my laptop and get paid TRIPLE time for sitting on my **** for 12 hrs. I will also go hit the gym downstairs to break up the night. I will just take my money and use it for WDW and the cruise in September. I have a Sunday in July too that I am covering for a coworker. Sundays pay doubletime. I figure those 2 days alone will add a big chunk of change to my drinking budget for the trip.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Liisa said:


> Anyone got any good 4th of July plans?  We're hosting a party the Sunday after for some friends.  It stinks that the holiday falls right smack in the middle of the week!



I'm flying out to see my family for most of the week.  They have enough planned to keep us busy for a month...don't know how they think it will all fit into one week.  Plus I have 5 nieces & nephews, so will be spending some quality time w/the kids.  

I think I'll need a vacation when I get back from my vacation!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

For the 4th of July, DH and I are spending 3 nights in St Augustine, culminating in watching fireworks over the Matanzas Bay on the 4th!  We're SO looking forward to 3 days of the beach, great restaurants, and fun bars!  We'll be at the bayfront Hilton, which is about a block south of where the fireworks will be shot off.


----------



## fajaragirl

Hi,
I have only just found this thread and have read some from the beginning.
I would like to share my experiences of choosing not to have kids.

I go married in 1979 at 30 years old.
I have never wanted kids as i had such an awful childhood myself i couldn't imagine why anyone would want to bring kids into the world. I made this decision when i was 3. I met a wonderful man who also didn't want children but for different reasons.
when i lived in Canada when was about 31 i found a doctor who allowed me to be sterilized  remember this is 27 years ago. Very unusual to make choices like that  then.
I too, had many people asking why i didnt have kids and most people thought i was selfish. But i knew i wasn't  and that is what counted. i knew it was absolutely the right decision. and have never regretted it.
Many years of therapy later, which led to a  divorce too, i felt so much better about myself and life but still never regretted having kids.
After my divorce i came to live in The Gambia from the UK and after 2 years of being here was "given" a Gambian child to bring up as my daughter. 
It just happened and she has been with me now for 6 years and she is 8.
I never planned this and it was never on my agenda but you know it is one of the best things i have ever done.
i love her like my own and now at 58 is the right time to have kids for me anyway.
So i guess i am saying never rule it out you never know what is around the corner or what is in your life plan.
Thanks everyone for letting me share this and hope it hasn't spoilt the latter part of this thread.


----------



## mzliza3

You should be commended for doing such a wonderful thing! Parenthood isn't for everyone at certain points in their lives, or at any point. But adoption is a wonderful alternative if one has reached a certain age or have been sterilized.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Hixski said:


> Our 4th plans are very boring. DH and I are both working. I am in IT so since we cover 24/7 and Wednesday is one of my days......I get to work. Don't feel sorry for me though. There won't be a darn thing going on. I will watch a movie or 2 on my laptop and get paid TRIPLE time for sitting on my **** for 12 hrs. I will also go hit the gym downstairs to break up the night. I will just take my money and use it for WDW and the cruise in September. I have a Sunday in July too that I am covering for a coworker. Sundays pay doubletime. I figure those 2 days alone will add a big chunk of change to my drinking budget for the trip.




Hixsi, I have all weekends and holidays off, but if somebody wanted to pay me double or triple time, I would be thrilled to pieces to work a little extra!


----------



## kennancat

Saw this article in the paper today and thought you all would find it interesting: http://www.orlandosentinel.com/services/newspaper/printedition/sunday/orl-marry0107jul01,0,6410175.story



> *Fewer call having kids key to good marriage, survey finds*
> 
> David Crary | the Associated Press
> July 1, 2007
> 
> 
> NEW YORK - The percentage of Americans who consider children "very important" to a successful marriage has dropped sharply since 1990, and more now cite the sharing of household chores as pivotal, according to a sweeping new survey.
> 
> The Pew Research Center survey on marriage and parenting found that children had fallen to eighth out of nine on a list of factors that people associate with successful marriages -- well behind "sharing household chores," "good housing," "adequate income," a "happy sexual relationship" and "faithfulness."
> 
> In a 1990 World Values Survey, children ranked third in importance among the same items, with 65 percent saying children were very important to a good marriage. Just 41 percent said so in the new Pew survey.
> 
> Chore-sharing was cited as very important by 62 percent of respondents, up from 47 percent in 1990.
> 
> The survey also found that, by a ratio of nearly 3-to-1, Americans say the main purpose of marriage is the "mutual happiness and fulfillment" of adults rather than the "bearing and raising of children."
> 
> The survey's findings buttress concerns expressed by numerous scholars and family-policy experts, among them Barbara Dafoe Whitehead of Rutgers University's National Marriage Project.
> 
> "The popular culture is increasingly oriented to fulfilling the X-rated fantasies and desires of adults," she wrote in a recent report. "Child-rearing values -- sacrifice, stability, dependability, maturity -- seem stale and musty by comparison."
> 
> Virginia Rutter, a sociology professor at Framingham (Mass.) State College and a board member of the Council on Contemporary Families, said the shifting views could be linked to America's relative lack of family-friendly workplace policies such as paid leave and subsidized child care.
> 
> "If we value families . . . we need to change the circumstances they live in," she said.
> 
> The Pew survey was conducted by telephone from mid-February through mid-March among a nationwide sample of 2,020 adults. Its margin of error is 3 percentage points.



I found Whitehead's comments a little odd - personally, I don't link people thinking the goal of marriage is "mutual happiness and fulfillment of adults" to "popular culture is increasingly oriented to fulfilling the X-rated fantasies and desires of adults", but hey, that's just me  I'm tempted to see if I can find her comments in full somewhere to see if they got taken out of context.


----------



## Muushka

fajaragirl said:


> Hi,
> I have only just found this thread and have read some from the beginning.
> I would like to share my experiences of choosing not to have kids.
> 
> I go married in 1979 at 30 years old.
> I have never wanted kids as i had such an awful childhood myself i couldn't imagine why anyone would want to bring kids into the world. I made this decision when i was 3. I met a wonderful man who also didn't want children but for different reasons.
> when i lived in Canada when was about 31 i found a doctor who allowed me to be sterilized  remember this is 27 years ago. Very unusual to make choices like that  then.
> I too, had many people asking why i didnt have kids and most people thought i was selfish. But i knew i wasn't  and that is what counted. i knew it was absolutely the right decision. and have never regretted it.
> Many years of therapy later, which led to a  divorce too, i felt so much better about myself and life but still never regretted having kids.
> After my divorce i came to live in The Gambia from the UK and after 2 years of being here was "given" a Gambian child to bring up as my daughter.
> It just happened and she has been with me now for 6 years and she is 8.
> I never planned this and it was never on my agenda but you know it is one of the best things i have ever done.
> i love her like my own and now at 58 is the right time to have kids for me anyway.
> So i guess i am saying never rule it out you never know what is around the corner or what is in your life plan.
> Thanks everyone for letting me share this and hope it hasn't spoilt the latter part of this thread.



What a beautiful story.  I am glad for that little girl that she was able to be adopted by someone like yourself.

I once had a mom with 3 wonderful girls live with me.  The mom asked that if anything should happen to her, would I take care of her girls.  I would have done it in a heartbeat.

While I never had a desire for my own, I wanted to leave room in my life for whatever might happen.  I am re-married and my husband is a little more militant about not having children.  And I am "cheerfully child free".

I know it sounds like I am talking out of both sides of my mouth, but honestly, there are some great kids out there that I easily could have raised, just not given birth to!


----------



## stemikger

I totally agree with you krisalee.

Forgive me if I spelled you name wrong and also forgive me I did not read any of the replies.  I haved been married for 15 years and we originally thought we didn't want any children, but then we decided to try to have one.

Let me tell you, deciding to just have one child is just like what you are going through.  My mother-in-law told us if you are only going to have one, you shouldn't have any.  My sister actually said it was very selfish of us.  

I think many people have children because they think it is what they are suppossed to do.  I'm not saying all, but there is a large amount of them who are in marriages where they aren't happy, and by having children, they think it will change things.

I married my wife because I loved her, not because she could give me children.  Now don't get me wrong, my 12 year old daughter is the best thing that has ever happened to me, but I am glad I only had one child and and I wish people would just mind their own businss and let each family be the kind of family they want to be.  Be that no children, one child or ten.

Getting off my soap box now.

I applaud your decision to follow your hear and go against what society dictates.


----------



## fajaragirl

Thank you MZLIZA3 and MUUSHKA


----------



## Mrs.Reese

stemikger said:


> I
> I think many people have children because they think it is what they are suppossed to do.  I'm not saying all, but there is a large amount of them who are in marriages where they aren't happy, and by having children, they think it will change things.



That is exactly what happened with my friend.  Her marriage of 2 years had changed and became miserable for her.  She had moved away from all her family because HE wanted to be near his family.  She was miserable. He pushed her to have a kid even though she still had not finished school.  Well the baby wasn't the panacea she thought it would be and a year later they were divorced.


----------



## kennancat

Hey all - just a little warning I wanted to post.

I've been playing around with the new improved search, and it's much better. However, if you search on a particular user name, not only can you see what that user has posted, but it also returns ALL matches on that user name, even in the body of the messages (e.g. a post with "Username is an idiot" would show up in the search). I figure the last thing we need to do is make it easier on our trolls, so wanted to make sure everyone was aware in case anyone feels the need to make edits to previous posts


----------



## maddhatir

Well everyone has posted at one time or another how aggravated we have been that people ask us when we are having kids.......I can't be aggravated at this though.....

I was at SIL's house today and my little 5 year old niece looks at me and says........"are you ever having kids??" 

I said, "no way" "we have to save all of our love so we can give it to you and your brother!" 

She was fine with the answer, for now 

well- to top it off she asked me if I was going to be in a wheelchair b/c I told her I was getting old after I couldn't breath after jumping on the trampoline with her!

HEY! That takes a lot out of ya!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Well everyone has posted at one time or another how aggravated we have been that people ask us when we are having kids.......I can't be aggravated at this though.....
> 
> I was at SIL's house today and my little 5 year old niece looks at me and says........"are you ever having kids??"
> 
> I said, "no way" "we have to save all of our love so we can give it to you and your brother!"
> 
> She was fine with the answer, for now
> 
> well- to top it off she asked me if I was going to be in a wheelchair b/c I told her I was getting old after I couldn't breath after jumping on the trampoline with her!
> 
> HEY! That takes a lot of ya!



  

Our friends daughter was about 6 when she asked us if we were going to have kids for her to play with. We told her no. She said that was ok because she would always be SOOOOO much older than ours. I told her she could just be my best little buddy. She said that was good because I was her best OLDEST buddy. 

I am bored out of my mind here at work tonight. I think I better go make some coffee. Then I will go hit the treadmill in the gym in an hour or so.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Morning guys. How was everyone's 4th of July? We got completely rained out. It was raining so hard it looked like a hurricane outside. We ended up having to cook inside.


----------



## Ariel07

fajaragirl said:


> Hi,
> I have only just found this thread and have read some from the beginning.
> I would like to share my experiences of choosing not to have kids.
> 
> I go married in 1979 at 30 years old.
> I have never wanted kids as i had such an awful childhood myself i couldn't imagine why anyone would want to bring kids into the world. I made this decision when i was 3. I met a wonderful man who also didn't want children but for different reasons.
> when i lived in Canada when was about 31 i found a doctor who allowed me to be sterilized  remember this is 27 years ago. Very unusual to make choices like that  then.
> I too, had many people asking why i didnt have kids and most people thought i was selfish. But i knew i wasn't  and that is what counted. i knew it was absolutely the right decision. and have never regretted it.
> Many years of therapy later, which led to a  divorce too, i felt so much better about myself and life but still never regretted having kids.
> After my divorce i came to live in The Gambia from the UK and after 2 years of being here was "given" a Gambian child to bring up as my daughter.
> It just happened and she has been with me now for 6 years and she is 8.
> I never planned this and it was never on my agenda but you know it is one of the best things i have ever done.
> i love her like my own and now at 58 is the right time to have kids for me anyway.
> So i guess i am saying never rule it out you never know what is around the corner or what is in your life plan.
> Thanks everyone for letting me share this and hope it hasn't spoilt the latter part of this thread.



Just wanted to comment on such a wonderful post! 
You are so right...you just never know what is in store for you!! I always wanted kids - I was actually going to be Carol Brady - 6 kids and yes, a maid named Alice!! Well that didn't happen - not even the husband part. Work and illnesses sort of intervened, but I am a happy mother of three "fur-babies" - these are my kids!!! And who knows what the future will bring.


----------



## Hixski

We were getting closer to the bottom of the page. That will just not do.


----------



## Muushka

Hixski said:


> We were getting closer to the bottom of the page. That will just not do.



Yes, but we are communicating on the "They're my kids, they should be able to go anywhere" thread!


----------



## maddhatir

Muushka said:


> Yes, but we are communicating on the "They're my kids, they should be able to go anywhere" thread!



Hey! And what thread would that be???

Linky please!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Hey! And what thread would that be???
> 
> Linky please!



It was on the cruise board. About the adult only areas of course!!!

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=854971


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

Hixski said:


> It was on the cruise board. About the adult only areas of course!!!
> 
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=854971



If DCL didn't have adult only areas, then wouldn't families complain that all the beach chairs are being taken up by adults and their precious little ones won't get a spot to sit when they come out of the pool?

I mean, really, Disney does its best to accommodate everyone. Three different pool areas to keep everyone happy. Wouldn't parents be happy that there's a quiet pool to go relax and get away from the kids for a few minutes, too?

I will just say that if DCL didn't have adult only areas, I would be much less likely to go back, esp. w/o kids.


----------



## Hixski

LuluLovesDisney said:


> If DCL didn't have adult only areas, then wouldn't families complain that all the beach chairs are being taken up by adults and their precious little ones won't get a spot to sit when they come out of the pool?
> 
> I mean, really, Disney does its best to accommodate everyone. Three different pool areas to keep everyone happy. Wouldn't parents be happy that there's a quiet pool to go relax and get away from the kids for a few minutes, too?
> 
> I will just say that if DCL didn't have adult only areas, I would be much less likely to go back, esp. w/o kids.



The thread was about the adult only age being 18+. People were asking about their OH SO MATURE 17 yr olds. They felt it was not fair because they could not go to Palo and the adult pool. People need to remember we all had to go through an age discrimination phase.  I said there were things in 1977 when I was 17 that I was restricted by age too. Thats life, its just the way it is.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> The thread was about the adult only age being 18+. People were asking about their OH SO MATURE 17 yr olds. They felt it was not fair because they could not go to Palo and the adult pool. People need to remember we all had to go through an age discrimination phase.  I said there were things in 1977 when I was 17 that I was restricted by age too. Thats life, its just the way it is.



ahhhh, Yes, like driving for one, how about drinking, getting into an R rated movie!

It was just something you KNEW you had to wait for- and we never expected our parent's to complain about the age to get it moved up so all of us little angles who were "more mature" than some others will get special privileges! 

Rules are rules people........get over it.


----------



## kennancat

Interesting discussion on that thread - personally, I'd be okay with 16 and 17 YOs  in the adult area provided they were with their parent/guardian the whole time (no 19YO guy they met on the ship) and it was a 1:1 ratio. So if you have three kids between the ages of 16 and 17, pick your favorites!  Also, it'd be a one-shot deal; kid tries to drink or act out and that's the last of that privilege for this cruise.

A friend of DH's got married on DCL and they couldn't have the reception at Palo because the groom's brother was 17 and they wouldn't let him go to Palo. I appreciate that DCL enforces the rules, but I felt kind of bad for the family.


----------



## zima-cheryl

I just saw this news story & can't believe it...

"Nev. couple blame Internet for neglect"
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070716/ap_on_re_us/neglect_internet_addiction

Come on....even I know to get up from the PC & occassionally let the dog out & toss her some kibble!


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> It was just something you KNEW you had to wait for- and we never expected our parent's to complain about the age to get it moved up so all of us little angles who were "more mature" than some others will get special privileges!




Ok, so if we are going to adjust that "Golden Age of 18" rule, then I'd like to make some changes to the retirement age.  I'm ready NOW!!!  Excuse me, I've got to go let Uncle Sam know where to start sending my Soc. Security checks.   

Seriously, we've all had to wait for certain privileges.  Why on earth should that change?


----------



## Muushka

Liisa said:


> Ok, so if we are going to adjust that "Golden Age of 18" rule, then I'd like to make some changes to the retirement age.  I'm ready NOW!!!  Excuse me, I've got to go let Uncle Sam know where to start sending my Soc. Security checks.
> *
> Seriously, we've all had to wait for certain privileges.  Why on earth should that change?*



Because the sun did not rise and set on us when we were children!  
Because the earth did not revolve around us when we were children!!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Ok, so if we are going to adjust that "Golden Age of 18" rule, then I'd like to make some changes to the retirement age.  I'm ready NOW!!!  Excuse me, I've got to go let Uncle Sam know where to start sending my Soc. Security checks.
> 
> Seriously, we've all had to wait for certain privileges.  Why on earth should that change?



I WANT MY SS NOW! And WHY can't we change the rules- Somedays I _FEEEEEEL_ like I am a mature 62 so why would these rules apply to me?  

But wait, lets saaaayyyyyy, hmmmmm? How about this scenario..... I am going on vacation and I will turn 62 ON vacation- I think I should be able to get my benefits early even though everyone else has to follow the rules BHAAAA! GIVE IT UP!


----------



## ChisJo

zima-cheryl said:


> I just saw this news story & can't believe it...
> 
> "Nev. couple blame Internet for neglect"
> http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070716/ap_on_re_us/neglect_internet_addiction
> 
> Come on....even I know to get up from the PC & occassionally let the dog out & toss her some kibble!



This is terrible...I hope those kids will be alright. A couple of years ago, my BF divorced her husband because he chose to play video games over her....A choice he made without even thinking twice. After doing this for a couple of years, she decided to leave him and she went through a huge depression because of it. He literally told her one night that he was too busy to do anything with her because he was on the computer, for th tenth night in a row. She was wearing some sexy lingerie - he didn't even look up at her. What a blow to your self esteem....

Anyways, as for the other thread - I had to wait to drive, to drink, to get into a bar, to gamble in Vegas, to go into adult themed shows (think Vegas), to smoke, to get my degree, etc. Why are people teaching their kids that it's ok to disobey the rules just because they think they are mature enough??? I personally wouldn't go on a disney cruise simply for the fact that I am child free and can guarantee that their wouldn't be enough child free areas for me, but that being said, parents who want to go with or without their children should expect that there will be places that perhaps their mature 12/13/14/15/16/17 year olds cannot go...it's the rules - why bend them, and then where would the bending stop. Congratulations to Disney for enforcing it.


----------



## Hixski

ChisJo said:


> Anyways, as for the other thread - I had to wait to drive, to drink, to get into a bar, to gamble in Vegas, to go into adult themed shows (think Vegas), to smoke, to get my degree, etc. Why are people teaching their kids that it's ok to disobey the rules just because they think they are mature enough??? I personally wouldn't go on a disney cruise simply for the fact that I am child free and can guarantee that their wouldn't be enough child free areas for me, but that being said, parents who want to go with or without their children should expect that there will be places that perhaps their mature 12/13/14/15/16/17 year olds cannot go...it's the rules - why bend them, and then where would the bending stop. Congratulations to Disney for enforcing it.



The thing that makes me so mad about these parents is the fact that they are my age, my generation. We weren't raised like that. It just makes me nuts. My parents never tried to set my butt at a bar stool when I was a teenager (or younger) just because they wanted to and hang the rules about children at a bar. (Can you tell people have been sitting their kids at the bars at restaurants lately, at least they tell them they have to be 21 ) The whole world does not need to revolve around children.


----------



## kennancat

zima-cheryl said:


> I just saw this news story & can't believe it...
> 
> "Nev. couple blame Internet for neglect"
> http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070716/ap_on_re_us/neglect_internet_addiction
> 
> Come on....even I know to get up from the PC & occassionally let the dog out & toss her some kibble!


Amazing - I'm surprised this couple found the time to A) make the kids in the first place and B) go to the hospital and have them!


----------



## Liisa

Hixski said:


> My parents never tried to set my butt at a bar stool when I was a teenager (or younger) just because they wanted to and hang the rules about children at a bar. (Can you tell people have been sitting their kids at the bars at restaurants lately, at least they tell them they have to be 21 ) The whole world does not need to revolve around children.



This reminded me... DH and I were at the Adventurers Club at DTD last September.  Now I know that some parents want to see what it's all about and early on in the night, things are pretty tame.  I really don't have a problem with that.  But the night we went, a family had an infant (couldn't have been older than 9 months) and they were there fairly late.  It got to the point where the characters were making fun of them (which I think is the point when they took the hint and decided to leave).  But the worst part - they were letting this little girl pick up their empty beer bottles and suck on them.  GROSS!!!  and INAPPROPRIATE!!!   Even DH commented and he usually doesn't pay attention to things like that.


----------



## Liisa

kennancat said:


> Amazing - I'm surprised this couple found the time to A) make the kids in the first place and B) go to the hospital and have them!



I'm with you.  The children weren't very old, so when did these people have time to have kids in the first place.  

That whole article is disturbing.  And the poor children.  I notice the article didn't mention that the parents were also starving - so they found the time to feed themselves.  Hopefully the kids won't suffer permanent damage and they are so young they won't remember this ordeal.  With any luck, they'll get adopted into a family that actually appreciates them.  Sicko parents.


----------



## TXTurtle

Two thoughts, first on the entertaining cruise line thread - while I get where some people are coming from and really wouldn't mind if Disney made it 16-and-up with a parent, there's also the issue that, well, they're rules.  And, really, that period of too-old for the club, too young for the adult pool only lasts a few years.  I know this is a horrible thing to even think about but maybe, just maybe, you should _wait_ for your DCL.  Go to WDW instead.  A few years ago my fam planned a cruise (on DCL, of course) and only realized after booking that my DB would be just a week shy of 18.  Instead of complaining they just rebooked for a month after his bday.  Solution found.  And amazingly none of us died by waiting a bit.

And about neglect - sick.  Ok, DH(2B) and I aren't having kids in part b/c we know we wouldn't be such great parents.  Sadly, because of that awareness, we'd probably be better than sooooo many people who breed.  Speaking of ages and licenses and stuff ... once again I think how much better the world would be if kids didn't come until one had a license.    Not like gov't regulated, just if nature worked that way.  Of course, in this perfect imaginary world no birth control would be necessary if you didn't have that license.


----------



## Liisa

Some of you may have seen this already - originally posted on the Canadian boards and linked the the Theme Park attractions board...  SOOO funny!!!

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1518663


(I've never posted a link before, so there is a chance that it won't work.  If it doesn't can someone let me know how to link to another thread?)   <--- nevermind.  It worked!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Some of you may have seen this already - originally posted on the Canadian boards and linked the the Theme Park attractions board...  SOOO funny!!!
> 
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1518663
> 
> 
> (I've never posted a link before, so there is a chance that it won't work.  If it doesn't can someone let me know how to link to another thread?)   <--- nevermind.  It worked!



O......M........G..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Liisa! That is freaking HILARIOUS!!!!!

I need to share it with some of my pirate lovers! This is too good not to share........I am off!


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

Krissalee said:


> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!




Hi--

I just wanted to comment real quick and then I'll go back into lurkdom.   

First of all, I read some post on here about how people can't imagine others not "wanting something so wonderful".  I have children, one of each, in fact...Yes, they are wonderful and I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world....BUT, there are times when it is SO very hard...like when they have a fever and are up all night screaming and crying.  To me, the kisses and hugs and the "I love you mama" make up for those nights.   There isn't anything in this world that I wouldn't do for my children.  The bond of love between mother and child is an amazing gift that I never thought I would ever feel.  


With that being said, some people just aren't cut out to be parents.  Some people couldn't handle the lack of sleep or the crying, or, as some of you said, some are just too selfish to have children.  (Yes, having children makes you selfLESS...You don't get to eat that ice cream sandwich all to yourself...There are always little ones that want to "share".   You don't get to spend your days as you choose...you have someone that depends on you. )

BUT, if there is an adult that already KNOWS they're not cut out for the hardest job in the world, then I applaud them.  Personally, I would much rather see someone who KNOWS they aren't cut out for motherhood and recognize that fact.  Why would anyone FORCE children onto someone who KNOWS they couldn't handle it?  It wouldn't be a good situation for the parent OR the child.  

Linda
Courtney 9-5-01
Collin 1-30-06


----------



## Devil_Dog99

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Hi--
> 
> I just wanted to comment real quick and then I'll go back into lurkdom.
> 
> First of all, I read some post on here about how people can't imagine others not "wanting something so wonderful".  I have children, one of each, in fact...Yes, they are wonderful and I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world....BUT, there are times when it is SO very hard...like when they have a fever and are up all night screaming and crying.  To me, the kisses and hugs and the "I love you mama" make up for those nights.   There isn't anything in this world that I wouldn't do for my children.  The bond of love between mother and child is an amazing gift that I never thought I would ever feel.
> 
> 
> With that being said, some people just aren't cut out to be parents.  Some people couldn't handle the lack of sleep or the crying, or, as some of you said, some are just too selfish to have children.  (Yes, having children makes you selfLESS...You don't get to eat that ice cream sandwich all to yourself...There are always little ones that want to "share".   You don't get to spend your days as you choose...you have someone that depends on you. )
> 
> BUT, if there is an adult that already KNOWS they're not cut out for the hardest job in the world, then I applaud them.  Personally, I would much rather see someone who KNOWS they aren't cut out for motherhood and recognize that fact.  Why would anyone FORCE children onto someone who KNOWS they couldn't handle it?  It wouldn't be a good situation for the parent OR the child.
> 
> Linda
> Courtney 9-5-01
> Collin 1-30-06



Cut out to be parents??? Excuse me??? I think the people who are not cut out to be parents are the ones who have kids but have absolutely no clue as to how to raise them. If couples choose not to have kids, it most certainly does NOT mean they are not cut out to be parents. It does not mean anything. Period. End of sentence. 

DW and I did not really choose not to have kids. It just never happened. And that is fine with me. But that in no way means we are not 'cut out' to be parents. We'd make darn good parents. And so would lots of others on this thread. And what exactly is wrong with being too selfish to not want to have kids? The selfish ones are the ones who have kids because they always wanted babies but then don't know which end the diaper goes on or leave the kid in the car while they go drink/gamble/socialize or call 1-800-grandma every Saturday night because they want to go out and not be inconvenienced by children.

I am hoping that you did not mean that all couples who choose not to have kids are all not 'cut out' to be parents. I do agree with you in that those who do realize they are not cut out and decide not to should be applauded for making a wise decision. But to lump all childless couples together as 'not cut out' is narrow minded.

Forgive me if I mis-read your intentions, but the way your post read


----------



## Hixski

Devil_Dog99 said:


> Cut out to be parents??? Excuse me??? I think the people who are not cut out to be parents are the ones who have kids but have absolutely no clue as to how to raise them. If couples choose not to have kids, it most certainly does NOT mean they are not cut out to be parents. It does not mean anything. Period. End of sentence.
> 
> DW and I did not really choose not to have kids. It just never happened. And that is fine with me. But that in no way means we are not 'cut out' to be parents. We'd make darn good parents. And so would lots of others on this thread. And what exactly is wrong with being too selfish to not want to have kids? The selfish ones are the ones who have kids because they always wanted babies but then don't know which end the diaper goes on or leave the kid in the car while they go drink/gamble/socialize or call 1-800-grandma every Saturday night because they want to go out and not be inconvenienced by children.
> 
> I am hoping that you did not mean that all couples who choose not to have kids are all not 'cut out' to be parents. I do agree with you in that those who do realize they are not cut out and decide not to should be applauded for making a wise decision. But to lump all childless couples together as 'not cut out' is narrow minded.
> 
> Forgive me if I mis-read your intentions, but the way your post read



You know I was sitting here trying to think about a reply to that too. I think you did a fine job at saying what most of us would think about that. THANKS!!!!


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

Devil_Dog99 said:


> Cut out to be parents??? Excuse me??? I think the people who are not cut out to be parents are the ones who have kids but have absolutely no clue as to how to raise them. If couples choose not to have kids, it most certainly does NOT mean they are not cut out to be parents. It does not mean anything. Period. End of sentence.
> 
> DW and I did not really choose not to have kids. It just never happened. And that is fine with me. But that in no way means we are not 'cut out' to be parents. We'd make darn good parents. And so would lots of others on this thread. And what exactly is wrong with being too selfish to not want to have kids? The selfish ones are the ones who have kids because they always wanted babies but then don't know which end the diaper goes on or leave the kid in the car while they go drink/gamble/socialize or call 1-800-grandma every Saturday night because they want to go out and not be inconvenienced by children.
> 
> I am hoping that you did not mean that all couples who choose not to have kids are all not 'cut out' to be parents. I do agree with you in that those who do realize they are not cut out and decide not to should be applauded for making a wise decision. But to lump all childless couples together as 'not cut out' is narrow minded.
> 
> Forgive me if I mis-read your intentions, but the way your post read




Oh my goodness, I didn't mean my post to be AT ALL in a bad way.  

What I meant by "cut out" is some people just couldn't handle the sleep deprivation or some of the other constant demands of having children.  That's really all I meant. There are people who DO have children who aren't cut out for it!   

As for being selfish, someone on this thread in the beginning said they were too selfish to have kids.  They loved their freedom, etc...  I was simply repeating what someone else had already said.

Apologies for coming across "badly"... 

Linda
Courtney 9-5-01
Collin 1-30-06


----------



## Liisa

Obsessedwiththemouse,

I don't mean this in any way as a flame, I'm just very curious.  You are obviously a proud mother of two (as am I - mine just have four legs and a tail!)  We have wondered numerous times on this thread why a happy parent would even bother reading these posts.  Can you shed any light?  

And just as a side bar - I happen to think I'd make a great mom.  I happened to have a dog that I loved dearly who had all sorts of health problems - to the point where I would sleep on a sleeping bag in my family room so that I could let him in and out all night long on his worst nights.  Poor boy finally has some peace, but I would have walked to the moon and back if I could have made him healthy.  

Anyway, my real point was just trying to figure out why a happy parent would read this thread...?   

Liisa


----------



## maddhatir

EVERYONE I know comments on what a great parent DH would make! (I am not sure if they ever told me that ) However, we chose not to have any kids b/c we just like our freedom- I was probably the one who said I was selfish (and proud of it by the way! )

We have several nieces and nephews and he is more of a worry wort than the parents are He also has so much patience! When we used to babysit when the kids were babies- OMG they would cry and I would almost rip my hair out-- Not him- he would hold them and walk them around until they calmed down. He would tell me to go outside and calm down 

I love some of these pics I took of DH with our niece and nephew on our last trip to Disney~ Hope you don't mind the pics!


----------



## Liisa

Hattir,

Love the pics.  Your niece and nephew are gorgeous!!!  Of course, I've always loved little girls who have curly hair.  Makes them so darn cute (too many Shirley Temple movies as a kid, I think).  

Oh, and hubby's not too shabby either!   

Liisa


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Hattir,
> 
> Love the pics.  Your niece and nephew are gorgeous!!!  Of course, I've always loved little girls who have curly hair.  Makes them so darn cute (too many Shirley Temple movies as a kid, I think).
> 
> Oh, and hubby's not too shabby either!
> 
> Liisa



Thanks Liisa~ I just think those pics capture what he is really like....The other day we were at SILs house an our nephew fell asleep on DH's chest- He was a bit miffed when mom tried to bring him up to bed- so she left him there for a while longer!

I have one more pic that I absolutely LOVE!


----------



## Hixski

Madd....the pictures of the kids are really cute. Oh, DH too!!!


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

Liisa said:


> Obsessedwiththemouse,
> 
> I don't mean this in any way as a flame, I'm just very curious.  You are obviously a proud mother of two (as am I - mine just have four legs and a tail!)  We have wondered numerous times on this thread why a happy parent would even bother reading these posts.  Can you shed any light?
> 
> And just as a side bar - I happen to think I'd make a great mom.  I happened to have a dog that I loved dearly who had all sorts of health problems - to the point where I would sleep on a sleeping bag in my family room so that I could let him in and out all night long on his worst nights.  Poor boy finally has some peace, but I would have walked to the moon and back if I could have made him healthy.
> 
> Anyway, my real point was just trying to figure out why a happy parent would read this thread...?
> 
> Liisa




Hi Liisa!

I think it's just curiousity to see how the "other side" does Disney.   

Personally, I was curious to see A) Why a single person would go to Disney since it seems so kid-oriented, B) What said single person DOES in Disney

Honestly, I didn't come to judge or come across bad.  

Linda
Courtney 9-5-01
Collin 1-30-06


----------



## zima-cheryl

Maddhatir - I really like that last pix you posted - the silhouettes are really sharp.  You should frame that one put it on the fireplace mantel.


----------



## Liisa

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Personally, I was curious to see A) Why a single person would go to Disney since it seems so kid-oriented, B) What said single person DOES in Disney



Ok... I understand.  And just to clarify (it might have been a typo) - but most of us are married or in long-term relationships.  We just happen to not have kids.  I for one can shed some light - DH and I enjoy alot of the pricier restaurants (easier to do on a budget for 2 people instead of a whole family).  We like to stay out late (usually at Adventurers Club on PI).  I also think that Disney can be very romantic for two people - think walking down Main ST USA after dark, heading to the Boardwalk bakery in the light of dawn for that first cup of coffee and some fresh pastry or strolling around world Showcase with a couple of adult beverages just before Illuminations starts.  It is also nice enjoying the thrill rides together without having to "child swap" or miss out because the little ones are too young / scared to ride.  We have the ability to change plans on a whim, eat whenever we like, stay out late, sleep in (or not) without having to worry about keeping a schedule with kids... Disney is a wonderful place to share with a loved one and not having children to cater to / worry about is such a freedom.  Of course, we LOVE watching the little ones as they meet the characters.  I get such a kick out of that look of awe.   And seeing all the little princesses running around in their dresses is fun.  I think our trips to Disney make more sense when you realize that we don't have anything against children (well behaved ones of course, but that is a whole other topic....)  we just don't necessarily want the responsibility of raising our own.  My 2 cents, for what it's worth....


----------



## zima-cheryl

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Personally, I was curious to see A) Why a single person would go to Disney since it seems so kid-oriented, B) What said single person DOES in Disney




I'd like to add my 2 cents to this too.

First off - I'm not a single person...I'm married to one of the most wonderful and loving men in the world.  I don't know how I was so lucky as to find him.  We are a happily married pair, taking on the world together.  (Of course that said I go single/solo to Disney in a heartbeat if the chance ever came up.)

As for why we go there... I never got to go as a kid, so for him it is a treat to show me around the parks and share w/me all his childhood memories and favorite rides and shows.  Also we honeymooned at WDW, so we have a lot of special memories there.

And you don't have to have kids to appreciate the service and attention the cast members give all their guests.  We have been doted on for birthdays and anniversaries.  (I still have the card Donald Duck gave me for my birthday.)  Disney really sets the bar for everywhere else we go in terms of service.

As for what we do - probably exactly what you do.  We ride the rides, enjoy the shows, eat way too much junk food, stay up too late and basically have a good time.  Granted we skip some of the "kiddy rides" like Dumbo, but we still enjoy rides like Pirates, Test Track and Tower of Terror.  Plus we take in the shows (we never miss La Nouba) and enjoy some nice dinners (Ragalan Road is a favorite). 

We are planning our next trip for Food & Wine Festival and my goal is to try at least one thing from every country/booth there over a long weekend!


----------



## kennancat

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Hi Liisa!
> 
> I think it's just curiousity to see how the "other side" does Disney.
> 
> Personally, I was curious to see A) Why a single person would go to Disney since it seems so kid-oriented, B) What said single person DOES in Disney
> 
> Honestly, I didn't come to judge or come across bad.
> 
> Linda
> Courtney 9-5-01
> Collin 1-30-06



I'm assuming she means that she went to the adult and solo travelers board first out of curiosity and then stumbled upon this thread.

I think the idea that "Disney is just for kids" is very common, but also wrong. Disney is one of the top honeymoon destinations in the US, I believe. While there is a lot of great stuff for families with children, it's also a legitimate (and humongous) resort offering fine dining, shows, spa, golf, and other activities. One of the other reasons DH and I like it is that the whole Vegas "what happens here stays here" attitude doesn't appeal to us. No, we've never been to Vegas and we do want to go at least once, there are just a lot of other places that I'd rather go first. Don't kill me, Vegas fans  Disney is great for us because we can get the good food and fun stuff to do in a wholesome environment.

So, speaking of food & wine, anybody know when the list of events comes out?


----------



## Hixski

kennancat said:


> I'm assuming she means that she went to the adult and solo travelers board first out of curiosity and then stumbled upon this thread.
> 
> I think the idea that "Disney is just for kids" is very common, but also wrong. Disney is one of the top honeymoon destinations in the US, I believe. While there is a lot of great stuff for families with children, it's also a legitimate resort offering fine dining, shows, spa, golf, and other activities. One of the other reasons DH and I like it is that the whole Vegas "what happens here stays here" attitude doesn't appeal to us. (No, we've never been to Vegas and we do want to go at least once, there are just a lot of other places that I'd rather go first. Don't kill me, Vegas fans  ). Disney is great for us because we can get the good food and fun stuff to do in a wholesome environment.
> 
> So, speaking of food & wine, anybody know when the list of events comes out?




DH and I say "What happens in Disney stays in Disney" but then I guess we are kind of weird.


----------



## kennancat

Hixski said:


> DH and I say "What happens in Disney stays in Disney" but then I guess we are kind of weird.


But what's funny about that is I see "What happens at Disney stays at Disney" and think "if I wear a giant Goofy hat to a character breakfast and have my picture taken with all of them, none of my co-workers will ever know" where "what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas" brings up... uh... different images.


----------



## Hixski

kennancat said:


> But what's funny about that is I see "What happens at Disney stays at Disney" and think "if I wear a giant Goofy hat to a character breakfast and have my picture taken with all of them, none of my co-workers will ever know" where "what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas" brings up... uh... different images.



I guess I just don't think everyone is so innocent when they get back to their resorts. If you know what I mean. Some folks might even wear that giant Goofy hat late at night................. 

Ok, now I am scaring myself.


----------



## ChisJo

A really good article....A good friend of mine sent it to me and I thought I would share.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19762056/site/newsweek/?GT1=10150


----------



## Hixski

ChisJo said:


> A really good article....A good friend of mine sent it to me and I thought I would share.
> 
> http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19762056/site/newsweek/?GT1=10150



That was a good article. Is is scary how true it is. Too bad most people will never see themselves in that article and that they are exactly like that. I guess there is always hope it might make an impression.


----------



## Liisa

ChisJo said:


> A really good article....A good friend of mine sent it to me and I thought I would share.
> 
> http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19762056/site/newsweek/?GT1=10150



ChisJo,

I actually just popped over here to post the link as well.  Finally - an article that can truthfully see both sides of the coin.  

Liisa


----------



## kennancat

Liisa said:


> ChisJo,
> 
> I actually just popped over here to post the link as well.  Finally - an article that can truthfully see both sides of the coin.
> 
> Liisa


Me too! 

There was another one too: http://lifestyle.msn.com/familyandparenting/raisingkids/articleab.aspx?cp-documentid=454101&GT1=10215

This one was part of the "Maybe, Baby" book.


----------



## kennancat

From the first article:





> I am at a party chatting with a woman I know slightly. As her young son squirms out of her embrace, she slips her hand under my shirt. She's not getting fresh with me. She's touching my tummy with her cold hand and asking me, in a concerned voice, "Why aren't you pregnant yet?" I smile, break free from her touch, and head to the food table to fill said empty belly with her brat's birthday cake.


Let me just add, if any of my "slight acquaintances" ever do this to me, I think they will instantly become "former acquaintances".


----------



## Prinny27

I've been lurking on this thread for a long time, but reading that article I just HAD to post! FINALLY - something that puts my thoughts into words perfectly! My DH and I just got married two months ago, but for about a year and a half before that we were already fielding the 'when are you going to have kids' question from his family and mine. His sister even went so far as to ask us to get pregnant so her daughter could have a playmate. Please, tell me what is more selfish than that! I'm sorry if I would rather focus on some other areas in my life - you know, like being financially secure,owning a home, and enjoying my husband's company - before procreating. 

DH and I decided a long time ago that we do NOT want kids, which we flat out tell both of our families. We just do not enjoy them. Sure, we can play with our nieces for a few hours, but we have no desire to have our own. Yet, we still get the 'you'll change your mind in a few years' from everyone, even his coworkers, as if it's anyone's business. Sadly, they all seem to think it is. It makes me so angry that people feel that they can comment on my life and my choices, as if they are involved in the decision. Where will they be when it's time to change diapers and pay for college?

I think my family understands that there's no way I'll ever have kids and a few members of his family get it. His sisters, though, are just clueless and really think it's okay to keep nagging us, as if THEIR happiness and THEIR view of how we should live our lives depends on it. I forwarded that article to both of them, as well as my sister, who fits the 'thinking everyone loves your kid as much as you do' description to a tee. LOL Thanks for the laugh!


----------



## PilotWife

I am one of those who is new to the board and just "stumbled" across this thread.  I think that it is great that all of you "know" you do not want kids and really kids are not for everyone.....My husband and I were married for almost 10 yrs before we adopted our first child (2 more came later) anyway, we were going to have children, life turned out differently, and we almost chose to stay "without children" .....  My mom finally said to me, and I will say this to some of you as what your families might be "worried" about.....When you are old and your parents are no longer here, and your spouse may not be here on this earth with you....what will you have? you will "for all practical reasons" be alone (or your spouse will be) and if you can think about that and picture yourselves that way and happy....then I (my mom saying to me) absolutely support your decision.   So my point is ...... parents especially.... tend to worry about their children and their happiness when they are no longer here, and my parents hated that my husband and I could be giving up on so much happiness later in life.  Just to give you a different point of view....
There are definately good points to NOT HAVING those kids upstairs tearing up their rooms. 

Oh yeah, and I have done Disney more times without kids than with, and you do the same things, but you see it through different eyes.


I will now "butt out" of your thread!!!!

Jennifer


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

PilotWife said:


> I am one of those who is new to the board and just "stumbled" across this thread.  I think that it is great that all of you "know" you do not want kids and really kids are not for everyone.....My husband and I were married for almost 10 yrs before we adopted our first child (2 more came later) anyway, we were going to have children, life turned out differently, and we almost chose to stay "without children" .....  My mom finally said to me, and I will say this to some of you as what your families might be "worried" about.....When you are old and your parents are no longer here, and your spouse may not be here on this earth with you....what will you have? you will "for all practical reasons" be alone (or your spouse will be) and if you can think about that and picture yourselves that way and happy....then I (my mom saying to me) absolutely support your decision.   So my point is ...... parents especially.... tend to worry about their children and their happiness when they are no longer here, and my parents hated that my husband and I could be giving up on so much happiness later in life.  Just to give you a different point of view....
> There are definately good points to NOT HAVING those kids upstairs tearing up their rooms.
> 
> Oh yeah, and I have done Disney more times without kids than with, and you do the same things, but you see it through different eyes.
> 
> 
> I will now "butt out" of your thread!!!!
> 
> Jennifer



Jennifer--

I am the typical mommy, but I really don't agree with what you just posted.

I had my children because there is no greater gift on this earth than a child.  When I look at my children, the love and bond I feel for them is like nothing I have ever felt in my entire life.  No relationship I've ever had or ever will have could ever compare to the love I have for my kiddos.  Everytime I hear "I love you mama" and get the cracker kisses, my heart melts.   Will it last forever?  Nah...but the memories I will have from my children are amazing and I wouldn't trade them for anything.  

I didn't have kids because I feared "being alone" later in life.  That's not my children's responsibility to "babysit" me as I get on in years.  I would NEVER want to put that type of responsibility onto my children---"You know, I had you so I wouldn't be alone later on in life...C'mon over and let's play bingo.."... 

For the previous posters, I think it's very interesting to read what others do when you don't have to make the mandatory Bippity Boppity Boutique visit or the countless Dumbo rides laughing: Everytime we stand in line for that ride, my husband always goes "Why don't they just add more elephants?!?")

I am intrigued by the "romantic" side of Disney...Hopefully, when we're retired we can someday experience it!


----------



## kennancat

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Jennifer--
> 
> I am the typical mommy, but I really don't agree with what you just posted.
> 
> <snip>
> 
> I didn't have kids because I feared "being alone" later in life.  That's not my children's responsibility to "babysit" me as I get on in years.  I would NEVER want to put that type of responsibility onto my children---"You know, I had you so I wouldn't be alone later on in life...C'mon over and let's play bingo.."...


Thank you! The "but you'll be all alone when you're old" is a really common thing that gets thrown at CF people. Yes, I worry about being alone, but like you just said, I will not make the decision to have children out of fear. Besides, you can have kids and still end up alone. The case I always use: my grandmother had three children. She has now lived longer than her husband and two of those three children. The surviving one, my mom, lives in a state halfway across the country. My grandmother is essentially alone at this point. Having kids is no guarantee of companionship in your old age, and IMHO, is a pretty selfish reason to have children.


----------



## PilotWife

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Jennifer--
> 
> I am the typical mommy, but I really don't agree with what you just posted.
> 
> I had my children because there is no greater gift on this earth than a child.  When I look at my children, the love and bond I feel for them is like nothing I have ever felt in my entire life.  No relationship I've ever had or ever will have could ever compare to the love I have for my kiddos.  Everytime I hear "I love you mama" and get the cracker kisses, my heart melts.   Will it last forever?  Nah...but the memories I will have from my children are amazing and I wouldn't trade them for anything.
> 
> I didn't have kids because I feared "being alone" later in life.  That's not my children's responsibility to "babysit" me as I get on in years.  I would NEVER want to put that type of responsibility onto my children---"You know, I had you so I wouldn't be alone later on in life...C'mon over and let's play bingo.."...
> 
> For the previous posters, I think it's very interesting to read what others do when you don't have to make the mandatory Bippity Boppity Boutique visit or the countless Dumbo rides laughing: Everytime we stand in line for that ride, my husband always goes "Why don't they just add more elephants?!?")
> 
> I am intrigued by the "romantic" side of Disney...Hopefully, when we're retired we can someday experience it!





I am sorry, I did not mean for it to come across "I had children to babysit me when I am old" I simply meant that....when your parents are going you will create your own nuclear family and your siblings will have theirs...Adult children and grandchild give elderly people a great amount of joy and happiness, even when they are not being babysat by an adult child. There are many other situations for elderly than being babysat.  and I certainly did not mean to have kids so that I have a built in babysitter.  
(my mom's experience is that her SIL never had children, and therefore is really alone because her husband died at an early age - 48 - she has no one other than my dad and mom - and that is not the same as a true nuclear family. It really is hard for her now and she is wondering why they made that choice of no children now)  Life Changes.

Jennifer


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

PilotWife said:


> I am sorry, I did not mean for it to come across "I had children to babysit me when I am old" I simply meant that....when your parents are going you will create your own nuclear family and your siblings will have theirs...Adult children and grandchild give elderly people a great amount of joy and happiness, even when they are not being babysat by an adult child. There are many other situations for elderly than being babysat.  and I certainly did not mean to have kids so that I have a built in babysitter.
> (my mom's experience is that her SIL never had children, and therefore is really alone because her husband died at an early age - 48 - she has no one other than my dad and mom - and that is not the same as a true nuclear family. It really is hard for her now and she is wondering why they made that choice of no children now)  Life Changes.
> 
> Jennifer




Hi Jennifer--

I understand what you're saying, sort of.  I think my life with just me and my husband would be very boring and lonely.  The kids add a little something to it and together we've found out what we're made of and what an awesome team we are.  When I see my husband hold my baby, it makes me fall in love with a different side of him.  

BUT, not everyone feels that way.  There are those on here who recognize that they don't want kids for this reason or that reason and that's awesome.  That's awesome that someone would be mature enough to say "ya know, I don't want kids for X reasons, so we're not having any".  There are those who are comfortable and happy with just being with their spouse and that's great.  Personally, it wouldn't work for me, but everyone's different.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

That's an interesting thought.  People who have kids so someone will take of them in their age-old.  I really hope that nobody actually thinks that.  It comes off as selfish to me.  Why would you want to burden your children?

I took care of my great-grandma the last few years she was with us because I was in college and had the time.  It was a burden at times. There were many things that I did not do because I had to go home.  I don't regret that time because I was honored to know a very wonderful woman. A woman who divorced her husband in the 40's because they had too many differences.  A woman who outlived all THREE of her husbands. She was quite the trailblazer. She didn't want to be a burden though and HATED telling me when she needed help.  The last year she was with us, she surprised me by sending me to Cancun for spring break. She told me to "have lots of fun and try out lots of equipment.  I know I'm off-topic here.

If I found out that the reason my parents had me was so I could take care of them, you can bet that would ruin my relationship with them.


----------



## 3DisneyKids

Liisa said:


> Obsessedwiththemouse,
> 
> I don't mean this in any way as a flame, I'm just very curious.  You are obviously a proud mother of two (as am I - mine just have four legs and a tail!)  We have wondered numerous times on this thread why a happy parent would even bother reading these posts.  Can you shed any light?
> 
> And just as a side bar - I happen to think I'd make a great mom.  I happened to have a dog that I loved dearly who had all sorts of health problems - to the point where I would sleep on a sleeping bag in my family room so that I could let him in and out all night long on his worst nights.  Poor boy finally has some peace, but I would have walked to the moon and back if I could have made him healthy.
> 
> Anyway, my real point was just trying to figure out why a happy parent would read this thread...?
> 
> Liisa



Hi Lisa--

I am not the person that you addressed this to, but I can offer my reasons for being on this thread.  As you can see by my screen name, I have three kids...all still quite young (4, 6, and 7).  And I am a very happy mom and very happy with my decision to be a parent.

The reason that I personally read this thread is so that I can see and hear the other perspective.   My life is so kid-centered (and all of my friends have young kids and we do things together, etc.), so it is really easy for me to forget that not everyone is in this place.  I have read things here...like stroller issues/cpmplaints, that I would not have thought about and just take for granted since it is so much a part of my daily life.

When it comes to Disney, sure, most people think of it as a place for families and young kids, etc.  However, I want to make sure that my kids don't do any of the things mentioned here that would take away from someone else's vacation.  Reading the posts here about annoying kids (or annoying parents!   ) helps me to keep those issues in mind and remember that not everyone at Disney is traveling with young kids...and more importantly, that having young kids is not a "free pass" for unacceptable behavior ("Hey, they're just kids....what're you going to do?"  type of attitude.)


----------



## 3DisneyKids

maddhatir said:


> Snip-snip for DH!!!!! Faster recovery time than you having your tubes tied!!! Fast and easy!
> ETA- and I believe a urologist would not have the same "issues" when it came to a guy- than a GYN would have for a woman-- Why doesn't everyone stop telling us we should do with our bodies!
> 
> As far as your tubes being tied- It should not be anyone's (doctor) business as to WHY you want it done- Have you asked your gyno about it??? Hopefully your GYN is not a "OB"GYN- I think they tend to be a bit more "family minded"



OMG, I know that many of your are going to freak out about this...but please...don't shoot the messenger!   

When my DH got snipped, his doc wanted MY ok to go ahead with the procedure!  ***?!?  Many of my friends also said that it was standard procedure...make sure your wife is on board before you get snipped type of thing.  I found this to be bizarre!

I swear, I felt like I was writing a persmission slip for one of my kid's field trips.  "Dear Dr. Jones, I give permission for Johnny to have his private parts operated on so that no live swimmers can invade my uterus...."    

Definitely, this is something a couple should talk about...but I don't think it is the doc's business as to whether or not this conversation has taken place.


----------



## aclov

kennancat said:


> Me too!
> 
> There was another one too: http://lifestyle.msn.com/familyandparenting/raisingkids/articleab.aspx?cp-documentid=454101&GT1=10215
> 
> This one was part of the "Maybe, Baby" book.



I read this one this morning and was going to post.

On a side note -  as for people having children so they can take care of them when they get old, there is no guarantee of that.     My mother in law had 5 children and 3 of them have died including her DH.     MY DH and I cannot take care of her not because we don't want to but I work far from home and he's self-employed and works very late hours.    My sister in-law works shifts and cannot take care of her, so she is in a nursing home.    Her grandchildren live out of state or cannot take on the responsibility.    

What I'm saying is there are no guarantees in life.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Hi Jennifer--
> 
> I understand what you're saying, sort of.  I think my life with just me and my husband would be very boring and lonely.



Life with just my husband and I (for the last 21 years  ) is anything BUT boring and lonely.  He's my soulmate AND my best friend. I don't mean this as a flame at all; I just can't imagine life as boring and lonely just because a couple doesn't have children.

I do think for a lot of mothers, their children are absolutely # 1 in their lives (and there's nothing wrong with that), but DH and I are # 1 in each others' lives.


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

PrincessKitty1 said:


> Life with just my husband and I (for the last 21 years  ) is anything BUT boring and lonely.  He's my soulmate AND my best friend. I don't mean this as a flame at all; I just can't imagine life as boring and lonely just because a couple doesn't have children.
> 
> I do think for a lot of mothers, their children are absolutely # 1 in their lives (and there's nothing wrong with that), but DH and I are # 1 in each others' lives.



I absolutely agree with you.  You see, I'm making the statement after I've had kids.  If I think back to a life without them, it seems boring to me...because I've already experienced the joys of having them...Make sense?  I can't imagine life without them.  They are the best decision I've ever made.        

If I didn't have them, I wouldn't know what to do with all of my free time!  (Except maybe take a well deserved nap!   )


----------



## PilotWife

PrincessKitty1 said:


> Life with just my husband and I (for the last 21 years  ) is anything BUT boring and lonely.  He's my soulmate AND my best friend. I don't mean this as a flame at all; I just can't imagine life as boring and lonely just because a couple doesn't have children.
> 
> I do think for a lot of mothers, their children are absolutely # 1 in their lives (and there's nothing wrong with that), but DH and I are # 1 in each others' lives.



My DH is my soulmate and best friend and will always be #1 in my life, that does not change when you have children.....yes, you do have to make children a priority for certain things within the family for a few years.  And I am so glad that you and you DH are very happy after 21 years of no children, I am sorry that I got everyone in an uproar about this "old age thing"....I was only trying to show another view of what my mom "worried" about for me , when I was much older, and possibly widowed.  I was just trying to show what life "might" be like for someone in their golden years and if you do not like that synario then you have the full power to re-evaluate your priorities, while you are younger, because there does come a day that is to late for children and family. (Even with adoption) 

I would worry that my daughter (although if she chose not to then fine) was giving up one of the greatest rewards in life and in her older life with other children that come into a family.  Yes, that would worry me about my daughter making that decision. 

Jennifer


----------



## kennancat

Saw this article just now and it made me think of our latest discussion. This is why whether or not you have kids, all adults should make sure that they have their financial and legal arrangements set to handle needing living assistance. (I know, it's in India, but I wouldn't put it past Americans!)

http://www.reuters.com/article/lifestyleMolt/idUSDEL32954620070719?src=071907_1249_ARTICLE_PROMO_also_on_reuters


> EW DELHI (Reuters) - An Indian couple found an unwell 75-year-old woman lying on a garbage dump, apparently thrown out of her home by her daughter and grandsons who did not want to take care of her, the Hindustan Times reported.
> 
> "She never complained about her family's behavior, only rued the fact that she couldn't move without help," Mohanasundari, one of the rescuers, said.
> 
> The "semi-paralyzed" Palaniappan told her rescuers her youngest daughter had quarreled with other family members over who should take care of her. The daughter then got her sons to take their grandmother to the dump in the southern state of Tamil Nadu.
> 
> Sons and daughters have traditionally looked after their elderly parents but sociologists say that the pressures of modern life are seeing more elderly people abandoned by their children or sent to old-age homes.
> 
> Politicians expressed outrage over Palaniappan's fate and said they would ask officials to take action against the family.
> 
> "I have asked the collector (a local official) to take care of the old lady, and take legal action against the children," state Social Welfare Minister Poongothai, who like many in Tamil Nadu goes by one name, was quoted as saying.


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

PilotWife said:


> My DH is my soulmate and best friend and will always be #1 in my life, that does not change when you have children.....yes, you do have to make children a priority for certain things within the family for a few years.
> 
> I would worry that my daughter (although if she chose not to then fine) was giving up one of the greatest rewards in life and in her older life with other children that come into a family. Yes, that would worry me about my daughter making that decision.



    My husband would get a kick out of this statement if he read it.  He knows my kids come first...ALWAYS.  If they need something or are sick or something is wrong, there is no other world for me.  Do I love my husband?  Absolutely.  He is my best friend and I am always here for him.  BUT, I am a mother and I worry and over-protect and that's just fine with me.  My kids have a mother they know they can depend on.  

Now, as for my daughter choosing not to have kids?  I would feel terribly sad for her if she chose that route, so I agree with you there, Jennifer.


----------



## kennancat

PilotWife said:


> I am sorry that I got everyone in an uproar about this "old age thing"


I think the main problem is that there's a certain number of things that CF people hear over and over (try searching "childfree bingo" to find a list) and this is one of the big ones. I think the majority of people who decide not to have kids really do make a decision and think through all these things for a long time before choosing not to have children. Look at it this way - pretend you and your DH decided to move to a new city. You're only going to be there for about three years, so you debate whether you should rent or buy a home. After much discussion, you finally decide to rent. You mention this to someone who then says, "Rent? That's just throwing money away! You should buy a house!" That person may have a perfectly legitimate point, it's just that you've been going over this for a long time in private and it's frustrating to have someone who's not familiar with your situation bring up a point that you've thought of and discussed many times already.


----------



## LuluLovesDisney

Just wanted to add that my mom took care of an elderly uncle until his death - not because he didn't have children, but because his two children didn't want to be bothered. I guess this echoes both sides. Elderly people might need family members for company or help, but I would hope that someone would do so, regardless of whether it is a child or not. I can't imagine a whole family neglecting someone because they are childless. My aunt is 78 years old and she lives in an apartment building. She makes it her business to check on older residents who are not as together and quick as she is. I guess having children isn't an insurance policy, but we hope someone will help the elderly, whether it is a friend, family member or child, just because it's the right thing to do.


----------



## ChisJo

Ahhh..the "you'll be lonely when your old" debate. Speaking as someone who has a) worked in a long term care facility, b) an Alzheimers care facility, and c) a palliative/geriatrics facility, let me tell you, just because you have kids, this DOES NOT mean that you will have that care or bond or companionship until the day you die. Also, I believe that I have seen more people die without their kids around than I have people die with them around. Kids with sick parents don't visit them as often as you may think. Most are abandoned and haven't seen some of them for years. 

I look at the environments I have worked in and it is truly depressing. It is actually one of the reasons that I don't want to have kids. Between the geriatrics and the pediatrics units, I don't know what has encouraged me more to stay child free. 

Yes, the memories that I might get from having children may make me all gooey inside, and I can understand why mommies don't get why anyone would choose not to have children when their bundles of joy occupy them to the nth degree, but what I can't understand is why people think that just because they have children, they have some sort of perfect relationship with them until the day they die??? My grandmother, for instance, lives in another province from all of her kids and grandkids...with the exception of my brother, who happens to be the most selfish person I know and wouldn't visit his grandmother if she was on her deathbed. So, that whole debate about "who will take care of you when your old" crap just irritates me....I plan on being taken care of in a private facility on the beach....end of story.


----------



## Hixski

I was just over on the CB and saw this thread. 

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1521541

It especially scared me because I am 47. If it has not happened by now it sure as sh** better not happen at this point.


----------



## zima-cheryl

ChisJo said:


> Speaking as someone who has a) worked in a long term care facility, b) an Alzheimers care facility, and c) a palliative/geriatrics facility



ChrisJo,

Bit of a side-bar here, but bless you for what you do!   

My grandmother was diagnosed w/Alzheimers w/in the last year, and she seemed to drop off fast.  We have her in a nursing home for Alzheimers and I'm so glad there are people like you who can care for her!  Because about all I can do is miss my grandmother (she doesn't even remember us some days).


----------



## Liisa

ChisJo said:


> ....I plan on being taken care of in a private facility on the beach....end of story.



DH says we are heading to the South of France to live out our days!


----------



## kennancat

Liisa said:


> DH says we are heading to the South of France to live out our days!


I like these communities that they're starting affiliated with universities. The idea is that you're near top-notch medical facilities and can also take all the college classes you want for free to keep your mind sharp. What can I say, retirement for nerds


----------



## Liisa

I'm looking for some recommendations  (and to be honest, this thread got tooooo quiet!   ) DH and I were planning a trip to DC next Spring.   But after a fairly stressful Spring / Summer - we are thinking of doing a lazier trip.   Not that DC isn't very pretty... but it would be go-go-go to see stuff.      Any thoughts on vacations that are relaxing, upscale    (but not break the bank pricey) and are a good destination for adults (as in, not a ton of kids everywhere  )   Oh, and to make it even more complicated, we can only do a 4 or 5 day trip (due to the availability of our dog / house sitter   ).  Thoughts?


----------



## maddhatir

How about a few days at an All Inclusive! Talk about relax! 

We usually do one a few months after going to Disney- DH needs to recover! 

We have been to the Dominican Republic- wasn't crazy about it. 

Our last all inclusive was to Cancun ( I LOVE Cancun) anyway- we stayed at the RIU Cancun, which is moderate, certainly not upscale, but very nice- we had 3 days left to our stay and they were just asking guests if they wanted to be upgraded to the RIU Palace in Playa del Carmen- OF COURSE we do!

It was a 2 hour ride, the RIU paid for the ride. It was awesome- champagne to the left and to your right! 

There were other RIUs within walking distance from the Palace that we could go to (we had THE wristband) however, no one else can get into our resort. 

Another relaxing vacation- how about a short cruise? 

Or you can charter a sailboat in the BVI or USVIs- have someone else do all the work while you sit in the sun!


----------



## Liisa

ooohhhh... I like the looks of the Playa del Carmen!  An all-inclusive might be the way to go... not too much to stress about.  Thanks for the links so that I can show the hubby!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> How about a few days at an All Inclusive! Talk about relax!
> 
> 
> Our last all inclusive was to Cancun ( I LOVE Cancun)



We have a time share in Cancun at the Omni, and just love the service there (they also do rent some rooms in another wing as hotel rooms so you don't have to lock in for a week).  I can't think of anything better than curling up w/a good book by the pool or on the beach.  And since it is all inclusive you don't have to worry about where to go to eat or bar tabs or anything other than which book to take to the pool w/you.

We also stayed at one of the RIU's in Cancun last year when the Omni was still repairing from the storms.  It was nice, and you did have access to the amenities at all 4 or 5 of the RIU's in Cancun.  Even so, I can't wait to get back to the Omni next trip.

The great thing about Cancun is it can be as relaxing or as busy as you choose to make it.  There really is something for everyone there.


----------



## want2bamommy

Hello. I thought I would share this article that I saw online today. 

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/AmericanFamily/story?id=3413039

As you'll see by my screen name I do want children but after 10+ years of marriage it hasn't happened for us yet. Perhaps not meant to be but my DH is an always will be my best friend and we haven't had a dull moment yet. 

Missie


----------



## Goobergal99

Being the parent of an "only" which I don't intend on changing, has really been an issue with my husbands family so I can kind of relate.

I have been a mom since highschool, so in all honesty DH and I are looking forward to having time for "us" We have been pretty busy through our youth being responsible parents.

So yea.... I admit it, I would love to stay in sugarloaf at The Grand Floridian one day and just kind of relax with my hubby.  

But I don't think that makes me any more selfish then people who don't want to have children and I certainly don't think anyone should be judged for it


----------



## Mrs.Reese

I liked how the article mentioned it was a choice and people felt they should have choice.  I really, really, really loved that people don't have kids not because they hate them.  I know we certainly love kids.  I couldn't be locked up in a room with 24 Kindergarteners all day if I didn't.


----------



## LoveStitch626

Ok.. I posted a vent... deleted my vent... Hattir, girl email me because I lost your addy!


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> Ok.. I posted a vent... deleted my vent... Hattir, girl email me because I lost your addy!



Did you just need to get it out and then you felt better??
How bad was it that you had to delete it 

E-mailed ya!


----------



## TKDisneylover

want2bamommy said:


> Hello. I thought I would share this article that I saw online today.
> 
> http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/AmericanFamily/story?id=3413039
> 
> As you'll see by my screen name I do want children but after 10+ years of marriage it hasn't happened for us yet. Perhaps not meant to be but my DH is an always will be my best friend and we haven't had a dull moment yet.
> 
> Missie



*Thanks for posting this article!  I agree with Goobergal99, it's nice that they listed it was "our choice" and that we don't "hate" kids.  I love my 2 nieces dearly and we've done a lot together (sleep overs, cookie baking for Christmas, Easter egg dying, etc.)  One of my nieces is now 20 and recently thanked me for the great memories she had spending with me & DH.  She said she hopes she can be that great of an aunt someday.  Brought a little tear to my eye, how sweet!*


----------



## raspberrysharpei

Lissa, Hubbie and I have taken several trips to Sandals Dunns River in Jamaica.  All-inclusive for five nights at a reasonable rate, we enjoy this resort so much, we have taken three other couples at various times. Booking through NWA vacations seems to give us the best deal year after year.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Had another one of those "when are you having kids" moments with the in-laws.  I told them we would when I felt like it.  I had to have surgery for endo this year.  My DMil almost turned white when I told her it was stage four.  The first question out of her mouth was, "Can you still have kids?"  Ugh....

I was so tempted to tell her no but we would be becoming those crazy cat people instead.


----------



## ChisJo

Mrs.Reese said:


> I was so tempted to tell her no but we would be becoming those crazy cat people instead.



I always say that I am going to be one of those crazy cat people who lives down the street....My BF won't allow me to have more than one cat right now, but maybe in a few of years, when he's too old and feeble to argue, I can convince him otherwise....


----------



## PrincessKitty1

ChisJo said:


> I always say that I am going to be one of those crazy cat people who lives down the street....My BF won't allow me to have more than one cat right now, but maybe in a few of years, when he's too old and feeble to argue, I can convince him otherwise....



I've been saying I would become a "crazy cat person" since I was a kid! 

The way my life has evolved, though, I think I'll turn out to be the crazy dog lady instead.


----------



## kennancat

Random Friday thought as we're coming to the close of the workday.

Not that I would really do this, but sometimes I'm so tempted to copy the original post from this thread, go to the Family board, and repost it there word for word except reverse the situation so that it's a couple who wants children and the family and friends are giving them reasons not to!  I would just love to see the responses, and I'll bet you not a single poster would go onto that thread and criticize their choice or tell them that they'll regret it one day. 

Just to get it out of my system, here's how it would look:



> I am 32 years old. I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I want to have children. I have always wanted to have children. Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We want children someday. We are not happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "Yes, we are going to have children"
> "Yes, we are planning on having children."
> "We want to have children - our dogs aren't enough."
> "We want children - we are not very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose to have chidren."
> "We choose not to be child-free."
> "We choose to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, but that won't satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable. They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad. I think a lot of people are not having children because it is what other people think they should do, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!


----------



## Hixski

kennancat said:


> Random Friday thought as we're coming to the close of the workday.
> 
> Not that I would really do this, but sometimes I'm so tempted to copy the original post from this thread, go to the Family board, and repost it there word for word except reverse the situation so that it's a couple who wants children and the family and friends are giving them reasons not to!  I would just love to see the responses, and I'll bet you not a single poster would go onto that thread and criticize their choice or tell them that they'll regret it one day.
> 
> Just to get it out of my system, here's how it would look:



Thats funny! I would love to see all the responses to that. I look on that board from time to time just to see what they complain about.


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> I always say that I am going to be one of those crazy cat people who lives down the street....My BF won't allow me to have more than one cat right now, but maybe in a few of years, when he's too old and feeble to argue, I can convince him otherwise....



When he gets older get a few cats that look alike- just tell him they are the same one


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> Random Friday thought as we're coming to the close of the workday.
> 
> Not that I would really do this, but sometimes I'm so tempted to copy the original post from this thread, go to the Family board, and repost it there word for word except reverse the situation so that it's a couple who wants children and the family and friends are giving them reasons not to!  I would just love to see the responses, and I'll bet you not a single poster would go onto that thread and criticize their choice or tell them that they'll regret it one day.
> 
> Just to get it out of my system, here's how it would look:



Go for it!


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Please, please, please, please....... I would just love to see the responses.

DH used to say that he didn't want to be married to the crazy cat lady.  Then we got one.  One became two and now two has become three.  They are the best kids.  They only need string for entertainment, can sleep anywhere, and eat the same thing everyday.


----------



## ChisJo

maddhatir said:


> When he gets older get a few cats that look alike- just tell him they are the same one



It's just too bad I can't get away with it now....I keep using the "but she's lonely when we're gone" excuse, or "one is just not enough" or, my favorite, "every pet needs a brother or a sister...it's just not right to have just one". I'm sure you've all heard it before....he just won't go for it.


----------



## Muushka

I, too, have a great love for the feline.  And I, too, am limited to 2.  Actually it was only supposed to be 1, but a feral cat adopted us, and we couldn't resist.  We are both allergic.

I volunteer at a no-kill cat shelter for my fix.  After I get done with the cleaning, watering, feeding, I have my fill of the feline.  They appreciate it so much.


----------



## kennancat

Mrs.Reese said:


> Please, please, please, please....... I would just love to see the responses.





maddhatir said:


> Go for it!





Hixski said:


> Thats funny! I would love to see all the responses to that. I look on that board from time to time just to see what they complain about.



Ehh, in the end it wouldn't be worth it. I'd have to come up with a fake user name to do the post, and run up a decent post count so I wouldn't look like a troll. Then I'd have to come up with at least one or two other fake user names so that I'd have something to post negative comments with "Maybe your family is right and you would make bad parents", "What's wrong with you that you're not enough for each other?", etc. Of course, I would make sure to badly misspell words and throw in other grammar errors in my mean response posts. It'd only be fair to give the family board equal ammo as what we get  

Bottom line is I'd guess that doing all that probably equals grounds to have your real user name revoked, and I wouldn't want that  But hey, I did just figure out how to use the multi-quote! Cool!


----------



## Liisa

kennancat said:


> Ehh, in the end it wouldn't be worth it. I'd have to come up with a fake user name to do the post, and run up a decent post count so I wouldn't look like a troll. Then I'd have to come up with at least one or two other fake user names so that I'd have something to post negative comments with "Maybe your family is right and you would make bad parents", "What's wrong with you that you're not enough for each other?", etc. Of course, I would make sure to badly misspell words and throw in other grammar errors in my mean response posts. It'd only be fair to give the family board equal ammo as what we get



Oooohhhh... well thought out, very devious and quite clever.  I like it!!!  

I've been sending evenings with DH looking at the details of every all inclusive in Mexico and the Caribbean.  Tough work, but someone's got to do it!     At this point, looks like we are leaning towards the RIU Palace in Playa del Carmen, Mexico.  Looks so pretty.  Thanks so much for the recommendations.  They certainly kept us busy!


----------



## Pumbaa_

My DH and I celebrated our 24th anniversary today. The kids were very happy. One coughed up a fur ball, 2 got in a cat fight, and the other one dragged his rump on the rug. We are very happy 'parents'


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

kennancat said:


> Random Friday thought as we're coming to the close of the workday.
> 
> Not that I would really do this, but sometimes I'm so tempted to copy the original post from this thread, go to the Family board, and repost it there word for word except reverse the situation so that it's a couple who wants children and the family and friends are giving them reasons not to!  I would just love to see the responses, and I'll bet you not a single poster would go onto that thread and criticize their choice or tell them that they'll regret it one day.
> 
> Just to get it out of my system, here's how it would look:



  

I'm confused...what would the purpose of that be?  Maybe I'm just having a blonde moment.


----------



## kennancat

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> I'm confused...what would the purpose of that be?  Maybe I'm just having a blonde moment.


No real purpose - I'm just having a bitter moment  Mostly a social experiment to see if anyone would actually feel the need to question this hypothetical couple's choices in the same way that they seem to feel the need to question ours.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Pumbaa_ said:


> My DH and I celebrated our 24th anniversary today. The kids were very happy. One coughed up a fur ball, 2 got in a cat fight, and the other one dragged his rump on the rug. We are very happy 'parents'



Happy anniversary!  It's nice to meet another "older" (gotta put that in quotation marks, since I don't actually FEEL older) childfree person! Our anniversary was August 2nd (11 years married, 21 years together).  We've had 5 kids (4 canine, one feline; the feline has trained all 4 of our canines)!


----------



## Hixski

Pumbaa_ said:


> My DH and I celebrated our 24th anniversary today. The kids were very happy. One coughed up a fur ball, 2 got in a cat fight, and the other one dragged his rump on the rug. We are very happy 'parents'





PrincessKitty1 said:


> Happy anniversary!  It's nice to meet another "older" (gotta put that in quotation marks, since I don't actually FEEL older) childfree person! Our anniversary was August 2nd (11 years married, 21 years together).  We've had 5 kids (4 canine, one feline; the feline has trained all 4 of our canines)!



Happy Anniversary Pumbaa!!!

PrincessKitty: I am another "old" lady that does not feel my age. Well, maybe except in my dang athletes knees. DH and I have been together since we were 21 and 22. 26 years together and going on 22 married. We are going to celebrate 22 on the DCL Magic in September. 

I just took a picture of my old man (dog) tonight. The temperature was 99 here today and since he is 10 he was a little tired of playing out in the heat. He let us put his toy on him and just looked at us. Silly dog didn't even move. I will always be the dog lady, DH is just not a cat person.


----------



## ChisJo

Hixski said:


> I just took a picture of my old man (dog) tonight. The temperature was 99 here today and since he is 10 he was a little tired of playing out in the heat. He let us put his toy on him and just looked at us. Silly dog didn't even move. I will always be the dog lady, DH is just not a cat person.



AWWWW!!! Love the picture....it was a balming 100 degrees here the other day and the cat was so hot, she was panting!! Wish I would have gotten a pic of that....DH hates cats too, but we live in a condo, so I am not comfortable with a dog here until we have a house with a yard. But, sometimes the cat acts like a dog, so we are literally getting the best of both worlds!


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## aclov

Hixski -   that's how my dogs just lay around on their side especially when it's so HOT!   The floor is cooler for them, and when they come in from outside it's like they just wipe out.   Their so funny.

You have a very cute "old man"     DH and I are both dog people.   We like cats, actually we're animal lovers in general,  but we just prefer dogs.


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## ObsessedwiththeMouse

kennancat said:


> No real purpose - I'm just having a bitter moment  Mostly a social experiment to see if anyone would actually feel the need to question this hypothetical couple's choices in the same way that they seem to feel the need to question ours.



Bitter about what?  People on this thread chose to not have kids and, if they're happy with that decision, what's there to be bitter about?


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## momomonster

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Bitter about what?  People on this thread chose to not have kids and, if they're happy with that decision, what's there to be bitter about?



Being bitter is something we childfree get accused of quite often by the childed. She was being sarcastic. 

In actuality, we tend to be extremely contented folks, for the most part, as we live our lives according to our choosing and didn't blindly follow the "life script".

Just thought I'd take this opportunity to de-lurk. Hi everybody!


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## aclov

I have a friend who is a SAHM with 3 kids and feels that everyone should have the cookie cutter life she has.   If someone does not want children, they're considered "selfish" or if someone like myself hasn't been able to have children she feels sorry for them.       DH and I had his 4-year great nephew this weekend who is a handful.    Yesterday, I was telling her about our weekend  and she asked me if I enjoyed having him.   I told her that while I loved him, I was ready to send him home by Sunday    It was like she was expecting me to say that I was so sad that I didn't have my own child or something    I've gone through my heartaches and pain, and I have my moments so I don't need anyone to rub it in.


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## inkkognito

So when do people finally stop asking that magic question: When are you going to have kids? I am soon to be 43 and I still get it, although sometimes it has been reworded to: Are you going to have kids? 

I have three cats, two horses, and a bird, and that is more than enough for me and DH. Also, ironically, I do a lot of work with kids/families (I am a doctor of psychology). Between the animals, the work, and a passel of nephews and nieces, I feel no need to procreate. Sometimes I think it would be nice to have a mini-me, but then I think of the responsibility/commitment and know that I am just not willing to give that, which would not be fair to a child. I have three jobs and a very full social life...maybe it sounds selfish, but I am not willing to change that. But I'm hoping that at some point the questions will cease...maybe when I hit 50?!


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## jennynoel

inkkognito said:


> So when do people finally stop asking that magic question: When are you going to have kids? I am soon to be 43 and I still get it, although sometimes it has been reworded to: Are you going to have kids?



We're 25 and 27 and just starting to get the questions, although not from our families yet, thankfully. 

I'm not completely ruling out having kids, I think I'm too young for that. When I think about all the things I want to do with my life, having kids just doesn't really rank, though.


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## PrincessKitty1

Hixski,
Awwww....I love your white-faced dog!  

I remember that you're around my age (a few years younger, but who's counting?  ).  I love saying I'm 50!

Inkkognito, nobody asks me if I'm going to have children now, but I can't remember when it stopped--probably mid-40s. DH and I were married when I was 40 (we've been together since I was 29) and his sister gave us a jokey congrats card that said on the cover "Congratulations on your marriage!" and inside, "So when are you going to have kids?"  

aclov, welcome to the childfree thread.  I think many childless-not-by-choice folks actually have a lot in common with us childfree types.   I'm sorry you haven't been able to conceive yet. I agree that some people with children seem to need to justify their lives by telling us how much we are missing. But I've also had several women tell me they love their children, but wouldn't make the choice to have them if they could do it all over.  We each have to decide for ourselves, and perhaps there would be less abuse/neglect of children in the world if having children was not the default.


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## PrincessKitty1

Oh, yeah, and I'm trying to remember when people stopped saying, "You'll change your mind." I think it was when I was about 35ish.


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## inkkognito

The funny thing is, my DH was firmly convinced I would change my mind someday! I got married at 28 and was very solid in my decision, but it took him quite a few years of marriage before he finally believed me. He thought that hearing my biological clock would change my mind somewhere in my 30s.


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## ChisJo

inkkognito said:


> The funny thing is, my DH was firmly convinced I would change my mind someday! I got married at 28 and was very solid in my decision, but it took him quite a few years of marriage before he finally believed me. He thought that hearing my biological clock would change my mind somewhere in my 30s.



My BF is scared of the same thing...he is 8 years older than me and truly is in a place in his life where he can't imagine being a dad. We live in an adults only condo. I'm almost 30...he's 38. I am a very busy person and really can't imagine trying to fit in a couple of bundles of joy - ever! I have so many ambitions and desires, and the thought of having kids literally feels like the dreams are being crushed. My biological clock could go off, and probably very soon, but I have never felt the need for myself to be a parent. My parents have given up trying to convince me...but we still get it quite a bit from others. I get really upset when people ask...or when I feel like I have to justify my decision - do they have to justify theirs just because they want/have children? Anyways, I'll step off that soap box now.


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## PrincessKitty1

inkkognito said:


> The funny thing is, my DH was firmly convinced I would change my mind someday! I got married at 28 and was very solid in my decision, but it took him quite a few years of marriage before he finally believed me. He thought that hearing my biological clock would change my mind somewhere in my 30s.



Well, just in case I really WAS gonna change my mind, I never had my tubes tied.  But I didn't change my mind.


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## kennancat

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Bitter about what?  People on this thread chose to not have kids and, if they're happy with that decision, what's there to be bitter about?


It's not being bitter about the life choice, it's being bitter about having to deal with people's responses to your life choice, and I doubt that sentiment is confined to the childfree. Ask any mother of four who's pregnant with her fifth kid if she feels bitter about all the stupid comments people make to her - "don't you know what causes that", "aren't you done yet", "are they really all yours"? Same goes for the parents of only children - "one kid isn't a real family", "only children will be spoiled", "he/she will be lonely without a sibling". It's tiring to have people view your decision as something strange that needs to be publicly questioned, regardless of what the decision is.


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

kennancat said:


> It's not being bitter about the life choice, it's being bitter about having to deal with people's responses to your life choice, and I doubt that sentiment is confined to the childfree. Ask any mother of four who's pregnant with her fifth kid if she feels bitter about all the stupid comments people make to her - "don't you know what causes that", "aren't you done yet", "are they really all yours"? Same goes for the parents of only children - "one kid isn't a real family", "only children will be spoiled", "he/she will be lonely without a sibling". It's tiring to have people view your decision as something strange that needs to be publicly questioned, regardless of what the decision is.



Ahh...I totally get what you're saying...But like you said, "people" can do that with ANY situation.  

When I had my daugther at 20 years old, I heard alot of comments, also...(obviously the OPPOSITE of what you're hearing).  

Thanks for explaining to the confused over here.


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## kennancat

ObsessedwiththeMouse said:


> Ahh...I totally get what you're saying...But like you said, "people" can do that with ANY situation.


Exactly - and that's why you'll see threads where those parents get to vent about having to deal with that. This is our thread for venting


----------



## kennancat

inkkognito said:


> So when do people finally stop asking that magic question: When are you going to have kids? I am soon to be 43 and I still get it, although sometimes it has been reworded to: Are you going to have kids?


Welcome Barb! Don't these people understand that having kids would seriously cut into your cruising schedule? Can't go on the cruise after a certain month, have to wait until the kid's six weeks old to take him/her aboard, have to get Flounders reservations so you can eat at Palo, etc. 

Off topic, but I love your web site - thanks so much for putting it together. It's such a fantastic resource!


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## kennancat

momomonster said:


> Just thought I'd take this opportunity to de-lurk. Hi everybody!


Hi MoMo!  Love the explanation of your username in the title of your post!


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## Muushka

inkkognito said:


> The funny thing is, my DH was firmly convinced I would change my mind someday! I got married at 28 and was very solid in my decision, but it took him quite a few years of marriage before he finally believed me. He thought that hearing my biological clock would change my mind somewhere in my 30s.



What's a biological clock???  

You must be very young looking if they are still asking that dreaded question!  They stopped with me around age 40.
Thank goodness!

Barb, we also love your DCL website.


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## Pumbaa_

Thank god those questions stopped. Got very tiring. And I still wonder why I thought I had to answer   There are some real pluses being in your 40's!


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## Hixski

Pumbaa_ said:


> Thank god those questions stopped. Got very tiring. And I still wonder why I thought I had to answer   There are some real pluses being in your 40's!



Now some folks just want to tell you how sad it is that you don't have children!! I don't get that much but I have told more than one someone I don't have children and in my mid to (late) forties they want to tell you how sad that is. Nobody asks you if you want kids they just assume you want them and don't have them. I want to scream at them that "Yes, I thought I wanted them when I was 30 but it didn't happen. Now I am 47 and pray it doesn't happen". What is so hard about that concept.


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## KirklandTutu

So, does reading the DisBoards reinforce anyone else's decision on not to have children?  Because I tell ya, some of the stories and issues re. taking your children to Disney just make me more and more thankful about our decision to stay child-free.


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## Muushka

KirklandTutu said:


> So, does reading the DisBoards reinforce anyone else's decision on not to have children?  Because I tell ya, some of the stories and issues re. taking your children to Disney just make me more and more thankful about our decision to stay child-free.



* Yeah, Baby!!! *​


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## momomonster

kennancat said:


> Hi MoMo!  Love the explanation of your username in the title of your post!



Thanks, kennancat! I apologize for butting-in like I did and answering the poster's question for you. I forget my manners sometimes. 

MoMo the Monster was one of my favorite rides at Six Flags as a child and it's one of our kitty's names now. 



KirklandTutu said:


> So, does reading the DisBoards reinforce anyone else's decision on not to have children?  Because I tell ya, some of the stories and issues re. taking your children to Disney just make me more and more thankful about our decision to stay child-free.



I get a heavy dose of reinforcement for my decision almost every time I leave the house. Saturday afternoon Target shopping does it, bigtime, with all the kids screeching and whining along every isle. 

To me, this board is a mixed bag (like everything else) because there are lots of examples of happy kids in the land of dreams. I guess I avoid the nightmare threads. Are there any good ones I'm missing!?! 

And finally, do we still get asked "when" we're having children? Yes, almost monthly, even though we're in our mid-30s. Mostly because we look a lot younger and also because we live in the suburbs. I don't mind the question too much. What bugs me more is when I tell people I don't want them and they respond with horrified silence. I am thrilled with my decision and wish others could be happy for me, but I realize that is asking too much.


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## kennancat

momomonster said:


> Thanks, kennancat! I apologize for butting-in like I did and answering the poster's question for you. I forget my manners sometimes.


No problem at all, I appreciated it.


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## aclov

I sooo much hate when people ask those questions about having children, I wish they would just mind their own darn business!  Even people that don't know you well seem to have it in their right to ask.   Very frustrating.   

If I respond that I haven't been blessed with children or nothing has happened, I get "You can always adopt!" Or "Have you seen a doctor?"   If I respond that I have dogs that are like my children, I get "But it's not the same!"   If I respond that I don't want children (which I have done, thinking people will leave me alone), I get "But why? Don't you like kids?" or "That's so mean"

It's like whatever you say if not the right answer


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## tophee99

I must admit that I am one of those people who do ask about children.  However, when my friends have stated that they are choosing not to have children (usually followed by "we are happy as we are"), I do acknowledge that and tell them I am so happy for them.  All I want for all of my friends is for them to be happy with their lives.  So, if they choose to have or not to have:  children, pets, motorcycles, etc. I support their decision as it is what they want.  And accordingly, they support my choices.  

Enough is enough.  Be happy for your friends for knowing what they want in their life and what makes them happy!!!


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## KirklandTutu

momomonster said:


> To me, this board is a mixed bag (like everything else) because there are lots of examples of happy kids in the land of dreams. I guess I avoid the nightmare threads. Are there any good ones I'm missing!?!
> 
> .



There was one about kids being picky eaters, another about teachers and school supplies.  The latter of which had me seeing red as I am a teacher.   But just the general thank-god-i-don't-have-to-deal-with-any-of-these-choices is my resounding thoughts on reading most of the threads.

The worst comment I've ever personally received was from a mother of seven stating to me (after I told her that we were never planning on having children) that she 'couldn't believe people who choose to not have kids.  There must be something wrong with them in the head for them to make that choice.'  Wow, thank you, really.  So I'm wrong in the head, still want me to teach your kids, lady?  I just wish I had the guts to tell her that it was about populaton control.


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## momomonster

re: picky eaters

What absolutely shocks me on these boards are the *adults* who still eat only chicken fingers, fries, mac & cheese, and the like. I was a picky eater as a kid, but it was something I grew out of and I feel pity for the adults who will live their entire lives without experiencing the plethora of amazing flavors out there. 

That said, I agree it's a relief knowing I won't have to coax another human being into eating decent food. And I'm also thrilled to no end that I don't have to deal with back-to-school shopping.

re: nasty comments

KirklandTuTu, I have been told almost exactly the same thing by a neighbor and I also held my tongue because I have to live next to the guy. When I told him we didn't want children he looked straight at me and said, "You have issues." I responded that "Everyone has issues" and changed the subject.

I think more and more people are coming around to tophee99's way of thinking, but it's slow-going and there are FAR too many people out there willing to demonize us for making different choices than they made. They should be thanking us for not filling up the schools and roads with more and more kids, but instead we're called "selfish" and "bitter".

Oh, well, at least *we* know we're not those things!


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## bulah1

First of all, I have to say I was almost surprised to see this topic on the Disney boards, but - hey - I'm glad there are more of "me" out there to talk to about this. LOL!

I really don't care one way or another if I don't have kids.  My plans don't include one, that's for sure.  My job (which is my passion and takes up my life) won't really permit for one until I'm very secure and can demand more from it to cater to me... which won't be probably until I'm to old to have kids! LOL.  There would be complaints from many that your job shouldn't come first, but I'm sorry - when it's something you actually love more than anything in the world... you do it without complaint!  And I don't think it's fair to have a child grow up solely in day care.  It would be better to just have the child adopted to another family at that point.  But that is what my job would demand.  I barely have time for myself and let alone my fiancee, but we have a system and it works.  He doesn't want kids either. In fact, they do bother him quite a bit.  Me, they do bother me, but not to the point that if I did get pregnant, I don't know how easy it would be for me to give it up.  And I don't believe in abortion for myself necessarily (though I would never say it's not the right option for another woman - pro-choice).  

With my mother's history of miscarriages, I also have the slight worry in the back of my mind that would be an occurance if I were to become pregnant.  She had three in a row.  (Then stopped trying for a baby, and I came! LOL)

But, that is not to say I don't believe some people truley don't deserve children if that's what they want.  Everyone has the right to choose, and we should all respect their decisions!!!  Whatever our own opinion may be... who is to say what is right and wrong.  And what is to say children are the only way to fulfil one's life?? That's the reason I hate most that I get - when people say your life will be empty without children... well no!  I give my own life meaning through my actions and how I treat others and my own accomplishments... I stand on my own without needing children to fill whatever "void" these others may be experiencing.  I am not empty and am completely satisfied with what I'm accomplishing - more so every day because I am driven.

There are many people on this planet who SHOULD NOT be parents - those that abuse, neglect, can't provide for... etc.  Yet somehow they manage to have multiple children to pass these problems off to.  I don't want to pass my $%#@ off to kids that don't deserve it, sorry!  Then on the flip side, there are many people who desperately want to have kids and actually DESERVE to have them and will make wonderful parents and hopefully bring some great new people to our world - but CAN'T!  It seems tragic and unfair.  

That changed my view though - and I decided to give what they can't have, but I am able to provide.  I was very fortunate to be blessed with apparently wonderful and abundant fertility! LOL. And since I have no plans for it, I figure I will share it with those who are unable to have children.  I decided to donate my eggs to couples who chose me through a fertility clinic in my area.  I feel very privelaged to have been a part of it.  These people CHOSE me to help them bring a life into a world that they could not otherwise have acheived.  I am honored to help them, since they DO deserve it.  I have been lucky enough to do this five times over and have helped each of them through successful pregnancies.  Though I do not get to be a part of the process past the point of actually "supplying" my eggs, I did get to find out that the births took place.  And one baby I actually went back a second time to donate so they could have a genetic sibling.  I feel so proud to be a part of this, sharing something that is so valuable to others - that I won't ever use for myself.  

Just a thought for some of you out there in case you might feel the same.  

Kudos to those of you who don't want children though.  I don't believe it is selfish if you actually have the best interest in mind of the "would-be" child.  And to those of you who don't agree with not having children - I am sorry, I just can't see it from your side - because everyone is entitled to their opinion and you should be able to set differences aside and stop pressing your own views on others.    Can't we all just get along? LOL


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Oooohhhh... well thought out, very devious and quite clever.  I like it!!!
> 
> I've been sending evenings with DH looking at the details of every all inclusive in Mexico and the Caribbean.  Tough work, but someone's got to do it!     At this point, looks like we are leaning towards the RIU Palace in Playa del Carmen, Mexico.  Looks so pretty.  Thanks so much for the recommendations.  They certainly kept us busy!



Lis- Just a little FYI- the beach is a bit of a hike. When you do go- try and get chairs (facing the ocean) to the right. The jet ski fuel odor is less noticible down there. Oh- and DH wants me to tell you- there was no bar service on the beach! They have a minibar close to the beach- but no one comes around and takes your drink orders 

Our room was stocked with top shelf booze though! All hanging upsidedown right on the wall- waiting to be poured! And as I said- champagne- ask and you shall receive! We sat in the "courtyard" at night and the waiters were right there ready to get a drink for you!

And one more thing! Have you ever see the capybaras in Mexico?? If not, check them out. They are all over the Palace grounds- DH and I had a room on the ground floor with a patio facing the fountain and we were eating breakfast one morning and one comes up to the patio railing. I was freaking out b/c I seen them walking around, bet never this close! eeek! I put my feet up on the lounge chair and waited it out- he just stood there staring at me like- "Yo lady- gonna share some of that breakfast with me?" He wandered off- I do not think they will hurt you or else they would warn you about it.

But then again you are in Mexico-  

oooo- and another thing I loved was the chocolate fountain during dinner!- Sure, anyone can put a strawberry under the chocolate fountain, me? I grabbed a macaroon and smoothered it in chocolate! 

There is also a little shopping area down the street- come out of the hotel and go to your right- DH and I went left and missed it!  

There is supposed to be another nice shopping area closeby- I THINK it is called 5th Avenue- I am pretty sure you have to take a taxi.

I think I am done! So- when are you going??


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## maddhatir

Pumbaa_ said:


> My DH and I celebrated our 24th anniversary today. The kids were very happy. One coughed up a fur ball, 2 got in a cat fight, and the other one dragged his rump on the rug. We are very happy 'parents'



Happy "belated" Anniversary!


----------



## kennancat

bulah1 said:


> And since I have no plans for it, I figure I will share it with those who are unable to have children.  I decided to donate my eggs to couples who chose me through a fertility clinic in my area.  I feel very privelaged to have been a part of it.  These people CHOSE me to help them bring a life into a world that they could not otherwise have acheived.  I am honored to help them, since they DO deserve it.  I have been lucky enough to do this five times over and have helped each of them through successful pregnancies.  Though I do not get to be a part of the process past the point of actually "supplying" my eggs, I did get to find out that the births took place.  And one baby I actually went back a second time to donate so they could have a genetic sibling.  I feel so proud to be a part of this, sharing something that is so valuable to others - that I won't ever use for myself.


Good for you! I have two friends who have gone through IVF so I'm assuming that you had to go through something similar to donate eggs - it was not an easy or painless process, so I'm impressed that you were willing to do that for others.


----------



## ChisJo

maddhatir said:


> oooo- and another thing I loved was the chocolate fountain during dinner!- Sure, anyone can put a strawberry under the chocolate fountain, me? I grabbed a macaroon and smoothered it in chocolate!



Now, you are talking my kind of language!!!


----------



## bulah1

kennancat said:


> Good for you! I have two friends who have gone through IVF so I'm assuming that you had to go through something similar to donate eggs - it was not an easy or painless process, so I'm impressed that you were willing to do that for others.



Yes, that's exactly right!  I did go through about a month of "process" in order to do this each time.  They get me on a cycle to match the recipient so we're totally alligned for when they implant it.  Then there's about two weeks (sometimes more) of the daily hormone injections, daily blood draws and daily ultrasounds.  Sometimes several injections in one day, depending on how far my eggs were "progressed" it would deem how much more of the drugs I'd need to take.  I've gotten very good at giving my shots, LOL.  Then two nights before they retrieve the eggs at the clinic, they give you one last injection to take - usually mine were in the wee hours of the morning (between midnight and three am is what I experienced) that will release the eggs into the uterus for them to get at.  Mind you by this point you are already pretty uncomfortable in many cases because your eggs get so "boosted" by hormones and there are multiples (not just one egg) you can get pretty bloated to the point you are sore and boy can the drugs make you moody! LOL.  Blame the drugs right? LOL.  It is the closest I'll ever get to being pregnant, which is not saying much - it's nowhere near what happens in pregnancy - but it's weird that for some reason you can almost "feel" life attached to you at that point... I dunno... maybe my mind playing tricks, but I did somehow feel "motherly".  Then the morning of the last injection I went in for one last "checkup" blood draw to make sure everything was good to go.  The day after that would be the actual "procedure".  Now the clinic I went to (and I'm sure most are this way) do everything to make you comfortable because the actual process is not necessarily fun... But the nurses were stellar, I can't say enough about them.  You are not allowed to eat or drink for several hours before hand (like with any surgery or procedure where you will be administered any type of sedation).  This is not always fun when they push your procedure until AFTER lunch time...    They situate you in a hospital gown, make you pee about 30 times to make sure  , take blood pressure and pulse every so many minutes, and start the saline IV.  When the procedure room opens up and they take you inside, it's set at 98 degrees... I kid you not.  They have to have it that way in order to preserve the eggs once they leave the body.  So you get nasty hot, and so do all the people who are there working on/with you!  They had about half a dozen people crammed into the small-ish room with space heaters running full blast.  They hop you up on to the table of doom... slide you down to the end of it... and I'm sure some of you ladies will understand, it was unlike any "gynie" exam in that my thighs were cranked so far up they touched my belly.  I hate to post that kind of visual... but I was so humiliated... I guess I got over it, but it really sucks when the doctors are asking you questions and your hoo-ha is literally sticking out closer to them than any other part of you... and you feel like hoo-ha is the only one doing the talking at that point and that's the only thing in the world at that point!  So humiliating... about 5 minutes before they begin they recheck vitals are start the twilight sedation.  Nope, nothing else is administered... and yes you can feel what they do.  At least I did in every case.  I did not fall asleep any time, and was just as awake as I am during the day at work.  (which I guess isn't the best example ! LOL) I guess some women do dose off slightly but I never did.  Completely aware.  So Dr. goes in with a speculum and an ultrasound stick that's got a special "needle assisting" attachment that will allow the needle to penetrate the uterus wall to collect the eggs.  They have to retrieve a minimum number of eggs when they go in, and sometimes eggs have a mind of their own, so they roam about freely.  This is not fun, because not only do you feel the needle inserting (I'm sure would be worse without the sedation, but still...) if the eggs are roaming, they have to push on your already swollen and uncomfortable abdomen into the vacinity of the ultrasound and needle.  I have had women almost putting their entire body force against my belly with fists cupped over one another into the gut... OH MY GOOOOOD.  The very last one I did (as positive as what I'm doing can be - I decided it was my last after how very much it hurt) they couldn't find hardly ANY eggs so the pressure they had to put literally had me in tears.  And not only that force EXTERNALLY but you've got doctor going mad INTERNALLY with the needle and ultrasound swaying to and fro.  Not enough to make me pass out or anything, but seriously - I don't cry from pain and I was tearing up.  

Once they've collected what they need it goes right to the lab, and honestly after that point I don't really know what happens to my eggs.  I am not sure if they are fertilized immediately or not, but the embryo will be implanted into the woman shortly after.  As for me, they cart me back out to a recovery area where they have me rest for about an hour or more and slowly get me to sit up after a while and stomach some saltine crackers and water.  Off they send me home with some antibiotics to take for a week and that is that.

Or so they think... the bleeding can be pretty intense after that procedure for a couple days.  I've only had "normal" results with that, but some women can be really hurt and have serious bleeding.  And the pain... well, it is not fun.  Probably as close to having birth as I'll ever get, and I'm sure nowhere close - but still not fun.  I walked hunched over each time for a minimum of 48 hours because your body just won't allow you to be upright for some reason.  You pretty much just "slug" out on a couch and don't move for the remainder of the day and dose in and out of sleepyness.  Finally get to eat something which is always happy times! LOL.  

I'm just telling it like I experienced it.  I'm sure there are some that have had much worse, and some much better.  I just wanted to be completely honest so if anyone ever thinks about doing it.  As far as why I did it again... well, I just think I've got something that is GOLD to someone out there and if they deserve it, who am I to not help someone when I have every means to.  Especially when I don't plan to use it for myself.  SHARE!   It really did mean a lot to me to do it, but I think 5 was my limit especially after my last go.  

It is still odd to think I have 5 little "me's" out there.  It is totally confidential to me, I have no clue who the parents are or even where they're from. They could be across the world for all I know, though I doubt it.  It's up to them if I'll ever meet the kids.  I am ok if I never do, in fact they put you through psychological tests before all this to make sure you are actually mentally fit to handle the situation.  But I do in the back of my mind still hold that curiousity to see how it all turns out.  Something I helped to provide.

It is all worth it though - when you get a note from the recipient couple that proufoundly expresses their gratitude to you for giving them something they could not accomplish solely on their own.  It makes it worth while to me.  Without a doubt!!


----------



## aclov

Bulah 1  -   All I can say is "Wow"!    I've had two IVF's so you are right on the money with how it feels, but for you to actually do it for someone else.    I have to give you lots of credit.    It's not a fun process when your doing it for yourself.    I think it does take a very strong person to do this because it would kill me to want to see the child.    My boss has a daughter from a surrogate and I wonder if she thinks about her daughter.   I guess you have to think of the positive choice, I just know I wouldn't be able to do it.


----------



## diannamaria

I just saw this quote on the internet and it seemed apropos for this thread.  Sorry if it's been posted already...

"You're dead if you aim only for kids. Adults are only kids grown up, anyway." - Walt Disney

There you have it!  From the man himself.  That's why we big kids love to go to WDW, no matter what our kid status.


----------



## aclov

It kills me when people say that Disney is only for kids.   Or ask why an adult would want to go to Disney w/out kids.   

Imagine if Walt felt that way, we wouldn't have Disney!


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## bulah1

aclov said:


> Bulah 1  -   All I can say is "Wow"!    I've had two IVF's so you are right on the money with how it feels, but for you to actually do it for someone else.    I have to give you lots of credit.    It's not a fun process when your doing it for yourself.    I think it does take a very strong person to do this because it would kill me to want to see the child.    My boss has a daughter from a surrogate and I wonder if she thinks about her daughter.   I guess you have to think of the positive choice, I just know I wouldn't be able to do it.



Thank you so much for the kind words!  It really does mean a lot to me when people give me feedback on it!

And as for not knowing the children... if it's right they will find a way to meet me.  If not, I already know I can deal with it.  But I can't say that I don't think about each of them.  It's just human nature, and probably part mother instinct I guess.  But I can know that the people they are with LOVE THEM and CARE for them 110%!  So that is a very good feeling.  I guess that's what I tried to get across all along but it never came out that way.  I think about them though and hope that if things are right for at least one of them someday that I might get to meet one.  That would mean the world to me to know how I did one thing for a month out of my life to affect these lives.  

In your boss' case, I really don't know how the thought couldn't go through one's mind, I know it does mine.  That's wild having a surrogate though, that's so much more than I am capable of - kudos to the surrogate! !!  Seriously!  1 month of ovulation is WAY different than carrying the life through full-term.  KUDOS!!


----------



## CJK

None of you will likely remember me, as I haven't posted on this thread for months.  I've been a lurker though throughout the months.  I have a question for you if you don't mind.

Dh and I are in our mid 30's and have no children.  We're not absolutely positive that we won't have any, but with each passing year we're getting closer to that decision.  My question relates to your friends.  I am now down to ONE female friend who does not have children and does not plan to have children.  Two other very close friends don't have children yet, but are actively trying now.  

How do you handle having no (or very few) friends without children?  I don't mind visiting with children from time to time (I don't dislike kids, I just don't know if they're right for me..).  I find myself very tearful these days.  When my two dear friends announced that they're now trying to have a baby (after sitting on the fence for years), I put on a brave face for them, but once behind closed doors, I sobbed.  I genuinely am happy for them for doing what makes them happy, but selfishly, I'm mourning the friendships I once had.  ALL of my friendships with other friends who have children, have understandably changed. The dynamic is undeniably different.  I don't blame anybody, that's just the way it has to be.

Am I alone in feeling lonely/left behind?  Do all of you deal with it better, or have you gone out and actively met other like-minded people (ie. No Kidding group)? I'm thinking of joining the local chapter in our area.  I just miss the care-free days of getting together with friends.  These days, children are almost always involved (which, again, I don't mind sometimes....but it's now at least 95% of the time).  I feel like I'm in mourning, but I feel guilty admitting that...

I probably sound terribly selfish and I'm sorry for that.  Do any of you feel similarly?


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

bulah1 said:


> There are many people on this planet who SHOULD NOT be parents - those that abuse, neglect, can't provide for... etc.  Yet somehow they manage to have multiple children to pass these problems off to.  I don't want to pass my $%#@ off to kids that don't deserve it, sorry!  Then on the flip side, there are many people who desperately want to have kids and actually DESERVE to have them and will make wonderful parents and hopefully bring some great new people to our world - but CAN'T!  It seems tragic and unfair.



Awesome way of putting it.  

P.S.--I love your "you are most like..." in your signature.  Where did you find that?  I love it!


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## momomonster

Yes, CJK, this is something I've experienced recently myself. My DH is a musician and I'm friends with his bandmates' wives, all of whom I thought were childfree since we're all heading towards 40. . . In the last few months they've all caught the baby rabies and started talking about trying to have kids. I'm sure many of them will.

It did initially bum me out. I actually felt as you describe- somewhat grief-stricken and sad.

But, I talked with DH about it and thought a lot about the reasons why we've made the decision we've made. I've rekindled old friendships with people I've found online (or they have found me) and I'm feeling a lot better. One of them is the mother of a teen so she, of course, applauds my decision! I have joined the local yahoo CF group and even discovered one of them works in my building! 

(I have heard No Kidding is wanting to start collecting dues or some such, so that is why someone in my area started the Yahoo group.)

Please don't feel guilty. The loss of these relationships is a legitimate concern because even if the relationships continue you are correct that they will not be like they were before. Allow yourself these emotions and get out there to meet other like-minded people. Our freedom is one of the luxuries the childed don't have, so embrace it! I hope these words help.

Happy travels


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

CJK said:


> None of you will likely remember me, as I haven't posted on this thread for months.  I've been a lurker though throughout the months.  I have a question for you if you don't mind.
> 
> Dh and I are in our mid 30's and have no children.  We're not absolutely positive that we won't have any, but with each passing year we're getting closer to that decision.  My question relates to your friends.  I am now down to ONE female friend who does not have children and does not plan to have children.  Two other very close friends don't have children yet, but are actively trying now.
> 
> How do you handle having no (or very few) friends without children?  I don't mind visiting with children from time to time (I don't dislike kids, I just don't know if they're right for me..).  I find myself very tearful these days.  When my two dear friends announced that they're now trying to have a baby (after sitting on the fence for years), I put on a brave face for them, but once behind closed doors, I sobbed.  I genuinely am happy for them for doing what makes them happy, but selfishly, I'm mourning the friendships I once had.  ALL of my friendships with other friends who have children, have understandably changed. The dynamic is undeniably different.  I don't blame anybody, that's just the way it has to be.
> 
> Am I alone in feeling lonely/left behind?  Do all of you deal with it better, or have you gone out and actively met other like-minded people (ie. No Kidding group)? I'm thinking of joining the local chapter in our area.  I just miss the care-free days of getting together with friends.  These days, children are almost always involved (which, again, I don't mind sometimes....but it's now at least 95% of the time).  I feel like I'm in mourning, but I feel guilty admitting that...
> 
> I probably sound terribly selfish and I'm sorry for that.  Do any of you feel similarly?



Hi CJK!

I am on the flipside of the situation.  Before our children we had several couples that were like us...without kids.  They have decided not to have kids and, obviously, we have 2.  

I felt the same way you did, but on the other side.  I knew that once we had kids our friendships would be over.  They cared about going to the opera and concerts, while we have a family game night.  We just grew apart and now have different interests.  

I miss my friends terribly, but when we got together with the kids, they were "annoyed" with them, so we knew that we had to find friends with similar situations.  

It's sad when friends have different situations and grow apart.  I think what you're feeling is perfectly natural and totally NOT selfish.  

I'm sorry this isn't advice, but I don't think you're wrong in your feelings at all.


----------



## KirklandTutu

Everytime I hear about another friend getting pregnant, I tend to get the cry on.  It's not because I want kids, but it's one more friend that I've lost.  I know that we're not truly cut off as friends anymore, but instead of couples night at 10pm at a favorite downtown resteraunt--it turns into a months in advance planning for events that I really don't care about (i.e. birthday parties, recitals).  I try to be supportive, I do, but everytime I just want to scream out about loosing another friend.  

I try to keep things as adult and normal with these friends as I possibly can, but the phone calls, emails, and visits get further and farther inbetween.  I don't think it's my fault or their fault, but we just don't have much in common anymore.  

I try to go out and meet new people, but that's always been hard for me.  So, every year there's one less friend who I hang out with.  We know a few other couples like ourselves, but they're older and other than not having kids, we don't have much in common.

So, any advice?  No, I have absolutly none.  Let me know if you find a good resolution though!  I can just commiserate.


----------



## Fritochips4u

KirklandTutu said:


> So, does reading the DisBoards reinforce anyone else's decision on not to have children?  Because I tell ya, some of the stories and issues re. taking your children to Disney just make me more and more thankful about our decision to stay child-free.



I have to say that reading THIS board has reinforced what a wonderful decision we made to HAVE kids.  Glad dh & I are not consumed with our furry mutt or feline.  what a life, to live for your dog or cat.   that's why us "families" come on this board....


Chrissy
5 kids


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## HockeyKat

CJK, I am mostly a lurker on this thread too, but I just wanted you to know that I am going through the exact same situation that you are.  My last remaining married friend is due in September.   I do have some single friends that I hang out with when DH is working, but DH and I pretty much hang out on our own in our off time.  We are in our 30s (me 31, him 36) and we know we don't want kids.

I don't really have any advice... but you are certainly not alone!


----------



## KirklandTutu

Fritochips4u said:


> I have to say that reading THIS board has reinforced what a wonderful decision we made to HAVE kids.  Glad dh & I are not consumed with our furry mutt or feline.  what a life, to live for your dog or cat.   that's why us "families" come on this board....
> 
> 
> Chrissy
> 5 kids



Forgive me while I venture into the rhealm of sarcasim...

Thank you so much for coming to the one thread that us marrieds who choose to not have kids can feel free to speak their minds and love the decisions that they make.  Thank you for coming to one of those few safe places for us and then judge.  Thank you, you just made my day.


----------



## Fritochips4u

KirklandTutu said:


> Forgive me while I venture into the rhealm of sarcasim...
> 
> Thank you so much for coming to the one thread that us marrieds who choose to not have kids can feel free to speak their minds and love the decisions that they make.  Thank you for coming to one of those few safe places for us and then judge.  Thank you, you just made my day.



Ummm...someone earlier posted that they come to the families board to see "what they complain about"....but THAT comment is okay?


----------



## KirklandTutu

Fritochips4u said:


> Ummm...someone earlier posted that they come to the families board to see "what they complain about"....but THAT comment is okay?



Going to the family board to see is much like you reading what we have to say.  That is fine. 

However, as many times as I'd like to offer the response of 'if you didn't have kids' or 'if you didn't have as many kids', I don't.  It's their choice, obviously it's your choice too.  

Read all you want, but please don't add one more voice to my life that says it's worthless because I've chosen not to have children.  My mother, aunts, cousins, parents of students, random people I meet...they do that enough as it is.   

One of the reasons the DisBoards attracted me was that, yay!  Disney!  but also this particular thread.  I thought 'oh my god, Disney people who don't have kids, I'm not the only one.'  I not naive enough to think that people don't read comments on boards that aren't directed toward them, however I thought there would be a bit of courtesy from people with kids to just let enough alone.


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## momomonster

Someone here said they READ your thread. They didn't post there as you are doing. 

Huge difference. Now shoo.


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## bulah1

Fritochips4u said:


> I have to say that reading THIS board has reinforced what a wonderful decision we made to HAVE kids.  Glad dh & I are not consumed with our furry mutt or feline.  what a life, to live for your dog or cat.   that's why us "families" come on this board....
> 
> 
> Chrissy
> 5 kids



WOW... why do you have to sound so condescending? Yikes.  You make it sound that because someone might love their cat or dog like a child - like that's a bad thing.  I feel sorry for people like you that can't appreciate fur people as much as regular people... that is unfortunate.  I don't dress my pets in little "baby" outfits or talk to them like a baby (ok, maybe I do that on occasion), but seriously - that does not make the loss of a loved PET any less than when someone loses a CHILD in my opinion, because I've been there.  So please don't come off so discriminating... we are here to share ideas and soforth, not judge. 

Sorry - I just felt like I had to add this because I saw how you posted a "sig"...

*ERICA
  2 fur babies - 1 deaceased - 1 alive
  1 miscarriage and 5 egg donations to help people have children that couldn't otherwise... *


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## Hixski

Fritochips4u said:


> Ummm...someone earlier posted that they come to the families board to see "what they complain about"....but THAT comment is okay?



That was me that said that. I have never once posted on the families board. I just look to see what people with kids complain about. Nothing rude about that. The people with children have alot more issues they have to deal with. Again I am just reading. Just for the record some of the people on here chose not to have children after the choice was made for them. Some could not have them and decided they could live a child free life. Thank you for lumping all child-free people into the narrow view you have of them. Now you know why we have this thread.

I also find it funny that you have 5 children and your first posts are on this thread. Care to explain that one.


----------



## ChisJo

Fritochips4u said:


> I have to say that reading THIS board has reinforced what a wonderful decision we made to HAVE kids.  Glad dh & I are not consumed with our furry mutt or feline.  what a life, to live for your dog or cat.   that's why us "families" come on this board....



you don't know me and you don't know my situation....you have no idea what my life entails or the sacrifices I make in my life to help others. Just because I don't have a child doesn't mean that my life is pointless...how dare you assume that just because I have a 4 legged child that I haven't made "wonderful decisions" in my life....Please leave this thread....you have insulted us - return to your narrow minded life.


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## kennancat

Fritochips4u said:


> I have to say that reading THIS board has reinforced what a wonderful decision we made to HAVE kids.  Glad dh & I are not consumed with our furry mutt or feline.  what a life, to live for your dog or cat.   that's why us "families" come on this board....
> 
> 
> Chrissy
> 5 kids



<sarcasm>Yeah, you're so right. Did you read that whole story that bulah1 posted about everything she went through to help infertile couples that she's never even met? What a sad, self-centered life.</sarcasm>

Thanks for visiting our thread - I have reported you to the mods.


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## KirklandTutu

Just wanted to say a thank you to everyone who's commented the last several posts.  I'm so happy to find a friendly thread of people who 'get it'.  My whole afternoon was miserable and I was near tears from giving too much thought to what one random person that I've never met had to say in re. to the choice not to have children.  I come back online and I am reminded that I am not the only one out there.  It made me smile.  Thank you all so much for simply exisiting.


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## Hixski

KirklandTutu said:


> Just wanted to say a thank you to everyone who's commented the last several posts.  I'm so happy to find a friendly thread of people who 'get it'.  My whole afternoon was miserable and I was near tears from giving too much thought to what one random person that I've never met had to say in re. to the choice not to have children.  I come back online and I am reminded that I am not the only one out there.  It made me smile.  Thank you all so much for simply exisiting.



I guess as I have gotten older my skin has gotten much thicker. Never let some random person get to you like that. People like that have their own issues when they need to insult other people. I have a friend that has 6 kids and she would be the first one to tell someone off like that. I joke with her that I can't imagine having 6 childen and she jokes with me that she would sometimes like to imagine not having 6 children. She GETS that not everyone has children. Too bad not everyone can be like that.


----------



## CJK

I would also like to thank everyone on this thread for their kind and thoughtful comments.  It helps tremendously knowing that I'm not alone.  I just wish EVERYONE could respect other people's choices.  What's right for one person, is not necessarily right for someone else.


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## aclov

What's interesting is that poster has a small number of posts which leads me to believe that they created a new account.   It's unfortunate someone would go through the trouble of doing that just to say something so negative and narrow-minded.  

And not everyone on this thread "chooses" not to have children, like myself.   Sometimes it's just the way it has worked out for some people.   And if they have made that choice, so what??   It's like choosing not to get married, not everyone wants a spouse.    But I guess that's a whole new thread!


----------



## aclov

Hixski said:


> I guess as I have gotten older my skin has gotten much thicker. Never let some random person get to you like that. People like that have their own issues when they need to insult other people. I have a friend that has 6 kids and she would be the first one to tell someone off like that. I joke with her that I can't imagine having 6 childen and she jokes with me that she would sometimes like to imagine not having 6 children. She GETS that not everyone has children. Too bad not everyone can be like that.



God Bless your friend!    I have a friend who I've mentioned before who is the opposite.   She's a SAHM with 3 kids and believes people are selfish who don't want children.    Or she feels sorry and has pity on those that are having trouble conceiving.    I honestly have pulled myself away from her because of the way she makes me feel.     I've known her for 20 years and we share the same bday but it's to the point were I don't even want to talk to her anymore.


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## autumnl78

oh my gawd i LUV you people! finally lol people who get that dogs and cats are kids. 
when drew and i were dating we acumulated 3 cats osiris, buttercup, and tux. then we got married. we've been married 3 years and some change. 3 weeks after we got married drew went to sea for 6 1/2 month. 1 week after he got home we went and got our beagle  baby. 
about 6 months later we got our calico arwen, took the 4 cats to the vet for shots and came home with 5 as someone had found a 3 week old under their apartment that the moms owner had moved with mom and not made sure they had everyone. so, we bottle fed natasha. then, we got captain henry. then sadly we lost buttercup to kitty heaven (seriously 4 months later i get all upset thinking about her..). we were done getting critters. until miss grace omalley found us.
i love kids. dont get me wrong. theyre great. one day we may adopt from overseas. but i have no intention of BIRTHING kids. seriously dont get me started on my  husbands blood line, and my families issues as well im sooo not carrying those on or whose yet merging them genetically. 
my parents refer to the beagle as their grandpup. she goes to grammy and pappys every day while we're at work. hell the dog gets to ride in my dads truck and he takes her to mcdonalds and gets her a bunless burger (not often or id throttle him). 
personally i feel i should be able to take my dog anywhere others can take their kids as 75% of the time my dog is better behaved than the kids who screams "nonono" for 8 isles up and down in the target and the rents just let him scream instead of going home or for freaks sake apologizing to the people the kid is driving nuts.
yes i AM that person who says "your childs not happy take them home and let them sleep" at 930 at night when a 4 year old is flipping out as theyre dead tired and the adult cant figure out why the poor kid is acting out. i also have 6 nieces and nephews who ive basically helped raise the 4 on my side so im not one of those people who doesnt understand kids cause they dont have them. 
i think what people need to remember is not everyone wants to be a parent. some people who are shouldnt be.some parents are great parents. some who want to be cant be. but, as long as all these people all just respect each other, and try to make the place a better world for all kids biped and quadraped thats all that matters. (also i think people must remember, my beagle is so the cutest coolest smartest doggy ever and my cats rock the socks lol)
regardless. i love my zoo. i love my husband. i love my neices and nephews. and thank gawd my parents have accepted im not a breeder, now if theyre friends would do the same life would be a lot easier.


----------



## bulah1

You know I actually lost sleep over this thread last night?  I was up all night thinking about the negative comments we've seen on this thread that are completely uncalled for.  I'm glad to see this morning that some friendlier banter has started back up for the most part it makes me feel like maybe somehow the point may be getting across to those on the other side of the fence.

To try and get things a little more back on track - bring it back down home to the Disney aspect of the question.

Walt made us a world to play in as EQUALS.  It is a place to set our differences aside and unite for the duration of our stay and enjoy the company of others and delve into the realms of imagination.  And shame on those who think the imagination is for children only.  As many have proven here time and time again, the imagination is for grown-ups too... and Walt GOT that.  Hence come forth his wonderful playgrounds.  It is a place for people young and old, single, married, divorced, black, white, gay/lesbian, non-parents and parents with 6 kids or more , or WHATEVER - to come together with a single mind and stop caring about what is WRONG with the world outside those gates.  And hopefully, when each of us goes back home - we take that attitude home WITH us!  There's a little too much rage outside those gates, I hope some of the "magic" leaks out home with us and can spread it around a bit! 

So please, check your problems and issues at those gates and hopefully before you enter these boards.  Just please try and respect people as you would want to be respected.  If you want to share an opinion it is one thing - but please do not judge.


----------



## bulah1

Hixski said:


> I guess as I have gotten older my skin has gotten much thicker. Never let some random person get to you like that. People like that have their own issues when they need to insult other people. I have a friend that has 6 kids and she would be the first one to tell someone off like that. I joke with her that I can't imagine having 6 childen and she jokes with me that she would sometimes like to imagine not having 6 children. She GETS that not everyone has children. Too bad not everyone can be like that.




I just love this post! It just goes to show people can actually see both sides of the spectrum! KUDOS!!  

I know I can kind of come off as "preachy" sounding, but that is not my intent.  I am just hoping that people here on the boards and hopefully outside as well, can all share this common viewpoint of respecting decisions.  It's good to be able to "joke" about it as well, which can really only be done with strong bonds between each other without being offensive.  I just think life without love is pretty darned empty.  I don't think kids are the only way to find that love... there are so many forms of it that are barely explored... (kind of like the simple idea of "paying it forward"... something you can do for someone can profoundly affect another's life).  Is it really so hard for people to just be "kind"?  

So if some of you parents are trying to "fill a void" in your life by having children, you are doing it for the wrong reasons.  You should be a strong, confident, and wonderful person standing on your own first - so that when you do have children you can pass those traits off to your children, and hopefully raise children that will be able to make some real positive changes in our world.  I'm trying to become that strong individual now, I'm sure I have a long way to go - as do most of us I'm sure - but instead of passing it off to children of my own, I hope to "do good" for others in other ways.  It's my opinion, and everyone is entitled.

Again, Kudos to those who already respect this about people... FREE WILL.  We all have it, no passing judgements!

LOVE,

Erica


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> I think I am done! So- when are you going??



We are going in May 2008 (8 year anniversary trip)... but we are up in the air again on the hotel.  We now have a short list of options.  The RIU is still on there, but now DH has also stumbled acress the Iberostar Grand Paraiso (which looks like it belongs in Vegas if you ask me) and the Royal Hideaway.  You know, it's so much easier to plan Disney... 

me to hubby "where do you want to stay, beach club or boardwalk?"

Hubby "we did the beach club, last time, how about the boardwalk?"

Me  "Hello, DVC people, I need a studio at the boardwalk."



Oh, and that capybara thing... at first I though, he's kind of cute.  Then I read the description - world's largest RODENT?!!!  EEK!     I think I'll be requesting a non-ground floor room!


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

autumnl78 said:


> personally i feel i should be able to take my dog anywhere others can take their kids as 75% of the time my dog is better behaved than the kids who screams "nonono" for 8 isles up and down in the target and the rents just let him scream instead of going home or for freaks sake apologizing to the people the kid is driving nuts.



NOO!! I'm allergic and would have an episode right in the middle of Target!


----------



## HockeyKat

bulah1 said:


> I just love this post! It just goes to show people can actually see both sides of the spectrum! KUDOS!!
> 
> I know I can kind of come off as "preachy" sounding, but that is not my intent.  I am just hoping that people here on the boards and hopefully outside as well, can all share this common viewpoint of respecting decisions.  It's good to be able to "joke" about it as well, which can really only be done with strong bonds between each other without being offensive.  I just think life without love is pretty darned empty.  I don't think kids are the only way to find that love... there are so many forms of it that are barely explored... (kind of like the simple idea of "paying it forward"... something you can do for someone can profoundly affect another's life).  Is it really so hard for people to just be "kind"?
> 
> So if some of you parents are trying to "fill a void" in your life by having children, you are doing it for the wrong reasons.  You should be a strong, confident, and wonderful person standing on your own first - so that when you do have children you can pass those traits off to your children, and hopefully raise children that will be able to make some real positive changes in our world.  I'm trying to become that strong individual now, I'm sure I have a long way to go - as do most of us I'm sure - but instead of passing it off to children of my own, I hope to "do good" for others in other ways.  It's my opinion, and everyone is entitled.
> 
> Again, Kudos to those who already respect this about people... FREE WILL.  We all have it, no passing judgements!
> 
> LOVE,
> 
> Erica



Erica, this is the best post I have read on this thread, and maybe ever.   I feel the SAME EXACT WAY about people who strive to find that job, that marriage, those kids, that anything to complete them or fill some sort of void.   People and things can't complete you -- you have to stand for yourself, and enjoy what comes to you that is good as additions to your joy, and grieve through the bad and hopefully learn from it and move on.   

For me, my kitty, my husband, my wonderful home, all add to my joy.  But if I lost any of them, I would grieve, and move on to find something else.   

However, I (and my DH) would find a child to be a loss and not a joy, and to me that more than anything says that children aren't for us.


----------



## Liisa

I'm several posts behind... forgive me as I catch up...

DH and I are also losing friends to parenting responsibilities.  We figure some day when the kids are teens or in college, we'll get them back.  For now, as funny as it seems, we do alot with my parents.  It sounds odd, but they act young and enjoy most of what we enjoy - going out to dinner, travelling, shows...  They even join us on a Disney trip once a year - my mom LOVES the teacups!   They've got no kids left in school and have lots of free time.  We have a terrific time with them.

I found an official childfree website for CT and it seemed pretty inactive.  So that wasn't any help either.  I understand the feeling of loss though.  We miss just being able to call up friends on a saturday night to have dinner and see a movie... no spur of the moment outtings when you have to line up a babysitter.  

We all got together for a bbq last month and DH and I felt left out.  As the only childfree couple there, we found that most of the conversation was about kids / schools / friends / how to restrict internet access / etc.  Since I've never come home and found my dogs looking at inappropriate websites, I really didn't have much to add!  Hmmm...  I bet my Khabo would really enjoy some puppy porn - he's kind of a crazy guy!


----------



## kennancat

bulah1 said:


> You know I actually lost sleep over this thread last night?  I was up all night thinking about the negative comments we've seen on this thread that are completely uncalled for.  I'm glad to see this morning that some friendlier banter has started back up for the most part it makes me feel like maybe somehow the point may be getting across to those on the other side of the fence.


I will admit to letting people's responses upset me on other threads. This last one didn't bug me too much because she is so clearly a troll (3 posts and 2 of them are on here?!?) that I'm not going to let her bug me - that's what she wants to do. I have a theory that the people who make these kinds of posts are very unhappy and are looking to put others down so they can feel better about their own lives. Honestly, I feel pity for her - people who are happy with their own choices don't feel the need to trash other people's choices. Sadly, we've dealt with enough trolls on this thread at this point that it's becoming like water off a duck's back


----------



## bulah1

kennancat said:


> I will admit to letting people's responses upset me on other threads. This last one didn't bug me too much because she is so clearly a troll (3 posts and 2 of them are on here?!?) that I'm not going to let her bug me - that's what she wants to do. I have a theory that the people who make these kinds of posts are very unhappy and are looking to put others down so they can feel better about their own lives. Honestly, I feel pity for her - people who are happy with their own choices don't feel the need to trash other people's choices. Sadly, we've dealt with enough trolls on this thread at this point that it's becoming like water off a duck's back



You're absolutely right! I usually don't let stuff bother me, but it's like so many others deal with this bull $#*& daily from people close to home, so it's so sad that strangers have to add to the blow.  I pretty much got it out of my system and have cooled off, I have to say I was steamed though.  I have worked very hard to keep an open mind about everyone's lives around me and not pass judgement - but I do it!  I have many people around me that are in situations I totally don't agree with, but it's their life and their lesson to learn and I won't dare say a thing about it unless they ask my honest opinion.  And if I DO give my opinion, I will never do it in a judgemental way.  And if I do, I hope they stop me and put me in my place! LOL!  I consider you guys my new "friends" and hope you'll do the same for me, I just want to be a good person... I hope everyone wants the same for themselves.  Seems that's not the case for some people though... sad.  

Thanks for the support system you guys!


----------



## Fritochips4u

-


----------



## KirklandTutu

I love kids, I do.  I love teaching them, especially the teenagers (I'm crazy, I know).   One of my smile-and-be-happy answers to parents of students when they ask me why no kids, is that if had children, I wouldn't be able to focus so much on my students.  No one seems to have thought of a come back to that one yet.  But it's the truth, it really is.  My job is my passion and first love.    It also gives me a good topic to relate to parents about.  They talk about baby carriers, it gives me the opportunity to hopefully save one more child from being a bucket-baby and later on having issues with reading comprehension (early development movement theory, one of my pet causes).  It's funny, children and teens are the center of my life, just not in the parenting way.  Vacations are wonderful because it's a true vacation from my job...and thank god for Disneyworld creating an escape for adults who still want to be kids.  Everytime I go, I get recharged, and I come back as a better teacher I think.  I see how the majority of kids in the States move and behave, and it reignites my passion for what I do all over again.

I'm so looking forward to February, when we go for a much deserved week long Disneyworld vacation.  Last time we went to Disneyland and hubby was on crutches after ACL surgery.  Now THAT was like taking care of a child.  It was relaxing, but not enough so, I still had to take care of him.  This time I'm being a bit more selfish I think, I'm making him go to Bistro de Paris (mmm, sweetbread), and I'm going to try as many odd treats as I can find.


----------



## momomonster

I've just reported her, as well.


----------



## Fritochips4u

6502


----------



## momomonster

Fritochips4u said:


> OH MY GOODNESS......WHATEVER WILL I DO!?!?!?
> 
> It's called a discussion...People don't get "in trouble" for that.
> 
> Chrissy
> 5 kids



You are being hurtful and insulting. You are not discussing a thing.


----------



## Hixski

Fritochips4u said:


> Nope, I'm not a troll, but thanks for the label...gotta love it.   I mainly lurk and read for informative purposes.
> 
> I just thought it was ironic that you all were saying how reading others' posts about kids made you all "so thankful" to be childfree....yet, the reason I come here and read this thread and the reason alot of people with FAMILIES come on here and read this thread is because it reaffirms, to me anyways, that I am SO SO SO SO SO SO glad that I DID have kids.
> 
> I read about the countless posts about dogs and cats and, while they are wonderful to have, it's sad when an ANIMAL becomes someone's life.  There was even a thread on here about someone took her BABY DOLL to Disney and posted pics.
> 
> Reading everyone's posts on here makes me sad that so many of you have nothing but a mangy mutt or feline.  It makes me sad because I know the joys of what I've experienced and to see someone put so much of their LIFE in an ANIMAL is very sad to me.  There's more to life than that.
> 
> I absolutely respect everyone's decision to not have children.  I think there are people that really should NOT have children.  BUT, to go to a families thread to read what we "complain" about...Very holier than thou.
> 
> I love my life, love my family and love my children with every fiber of my being.  It's very funny that everyone's saying "oooh, she must not be happy with her life...that's why she came here"...
> 
> I came here for the same reasons ya'll read the families thread.  This thread makes me MORE thankful that I have what I have.
> 
> Chrissy
> 5 kids




Ok, lets try this again. You just don't GET IT. You say you respect everyone's decision but you insult us with your comments. Did you even read that some people on here don't have children by choice. They made the choice after life made the choice for them. Bulah1 has helped 5 people have children that they desperately wanted. How insulting do you think your comments are to her????? 

I think it is great you love your life. We love ours. I have a dog. I love him to death but here is a news flash.......I love my DH more. My dog is not a mangy mutt as you call them and I certainly have more in life than him. 

I am not going to say anymore as I know some people will NEVER get it. This may be a discussion board but insulting people is not discussing.


----------



## aclov

Fritochips4u said:


> Nope, I'm not a troll, but thanks for the label...gotta love it.   I mainly lurk and read for informative purposes.
> 
> I just thought it was ironic that you all were saying how reading others' posts about kids made you all "so thankful" to be childfree....yet, the reason I come here and read this thread and the reason alot of people with FAMILIES come on here and read this thread is because it reaffirms, to me anyways, that I am SO SO SO SO SO SO glad that I DID have kids.
> 
> I read about the countless posts about dogs and cats and, while they are wonderful to have, it's sad when an ANIMAL becomes someone's life.  There was even a thread on here about someone took her BABY DOLL to Disney and posted pics.
> 
> Reading everyone's posts on here makes me sad that so many of you have nothing but a mangy mutt or feline.  It makes me sad because I know the joys of what I've experienced and to see someone put so much of their LIFE in an ANIMAL is very sad to me.  There's more to life than that.
> 
> 
> Chrissy
> 5 kids



Look it comes down to this -  Your either an animal lover or your not.   It has nothing to do with having or not having children.    I know people who have children and treat their dog or cat or bird or horse or whatever like part of the family.   I don't consider my dogs "just pets" to me they are a part of my life which means I have to care for them, but I also don't treat them like babies, dressing them up in clothes or feeding them with a spoon.   It's called being a responsible owner.   I know alot of people including my parents don't understand, my dad thinks I should get rid of them because they cost alot but he's not an animal person.   So you either get it or you don't.     And just for the record, I've NEVER been on the Families Thread.


----------



## kennancat

Fritochips4u said:


> Reading everyone's posts on here makes me sad that so many of you have nothing but a mangy mutt or feline.  It makes me sad because I know the joys of what I've experienced and to see someone put so much of their LIFE in an ANIMAL is very sad to me.  There's more to life than that.


I don't even have a "mangy mutt or feline", so I wonder how pathetic that makes my life? 



Fritochips4u said:


> I absolutely respect everyone's decision to not have children.  I think there are people that really should NOT have children.  BUT, to go to a families thread to read what we "complain" about...Very holier than thou.


I also read the family boards because I don't have kids and I'm curious to see what life and visiting Disney is like for people traveling with children - both the good things and the things that they "complain" about. I think it's made me a lot more aware of the issues they deal with on a daily basis and more tolerant. I don't get the impression that you're interested in anything that we experience or think.

And I just found it really funny that the post telling us how pathetic we all were came right after bulah1's whole post about everything she went through to help perfect strangers have a child.


----------



## momomonster

You know what upsets me about this TROLL isn't what she's saying, because it truly defies logic, but that she's over here _trying_ to hurt people. 

And she thinks she's the better person!?!


----------



## maddhatir

OMG! I go away from our thread for a while and I come back to craziness!!!

Man- That *Frito eater *is certainly looking for a rise out of everyone. Who cares if she lurks- but she also posts- I think that is what she doens't get- some of the CF may lurk on the family threads- but do not post......but then again, just like Hix said- why bother!?...scoot 

And Duncan??? a mangy mutt? She better bite her tongue! OOOO- that reminds me- I have to drop some supplies off to the animal shelter- yes, I will do that for the poor helpless animals b/c I do not have a life of my own............whoa is me........  

and *bulah1*-- WOW! Good for you. You are certainly a better person than I-- I call myself selfish for a reason! 

*CJK*--About loosing friends who are having kids- I guess DH and I were lucky- it seemed like our friends "staggered" their childrearing Over 27 years we had friends who were still CF while others were having them. And now it seems like most of our friend's kids are at the age they can be left alone- so we do get a chance to see a lot of our friends on and off. All of our friends DH and I have known since we were teens- so we will never really loose contact completely- they are the kind of friends who you can pick up where you left off and feel like you never missed a beat and we all still "get" each other....well for the most part anyway-- there may be one that is a little "nazi-mom like" with the whole kid thing- but even her kids are getting older now and it is not as annoying as it used to be.

*Liisa*- my SIL stayed at one of the Iberostars ( I think it was in the Dominican Republic) and know she said she loved it! She likes a lot of restaurant choices. And it had plenty!

And welcome *autumnl78*

and... hello to all the CF peeps!!


----------



## KirklandTutu

*sigh* I'm just jealous of all of you who have animals.  Circumstances of our lives has said that 'no, we can't'.  I always feel as if my life would have a bit more pleasure and fun to it if we did.  Meanwhile, I just enjoy the little contact I manage to have with cats and dogs when I go over to visit friends.  I just feel bad that when I come back home my husbands allergies sometimes act of because of any dander on my clothing.  

At least we have our stuffed animals.   I just found the cutest pirate sweaters for them yesterday at Michael's.

And truly, no part of this post was sarcastic.  I mean that.


----------



## HockeyKat

Hey Kirk, have you thought of volunteering at the animal shelter?  If you are bothered by kill shelters you could always find a no-kill.  Just keep a pair of clothes that is "shelter" clothes, would even be better if you could find a place with a shower and such so you could shower and change before coming home.

I just ignore trolls usually... they get their jollies from upsetting people, and imo those kinds of folks just aren't worth my time or energy.  Gee, a mean moron doesn't like me or my decisions, so what?     So sorry that it upset anyone, though.


----------



## aclov

maddhatir said:


> OMG! I go away from our thread for a while and I come back to craziness!!!
> 
> Man- That *Frito eater *is certainly looking for a rise out of everyone. Who cares if she lurks- but she also posts- I think that is what she doens't get- some of the CF may lurk on the family threads- but do not post......but then again, just like Hix said- why bother!?...scoot QUOTE]
> 
> Madd -  you crack me up, I'm trying so hard not to laugh out loud!
> 
> Missed you over on the Budget Board too!


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> *sigh* I'm just jealous of all of you who have animals.  Circumstances of our lives has said that 'no, we can't'.  I always feel as if my life would have a bit more pleasure and fun to it if we did.  Meanwhile, I just enjoy the little contact I manage to have with cats and dogs when I go over to visit friends.  I just feel bad that when I come back home my husbands allergies sometimes act of because of any dander on my clothing.
> 
> At least we have our stuffed animals.   I just found the cutest pirate sweaters for them yesterday at Michael's.
> 
> And truly, no part of this post was sarcastic.  I mean that.



I am RIGHT there with you! I actually YEARN for a pet....(a kid is another story!)- but DH and I both have such bad allergies and asthma- it is impossible-  now for THAT reason I can say......whoa is me!  If I was not allergic I would certainly be a "cat AND dog lady"! 



autumnl78 said:


> personally i feel i should be able to take my dog anywhere others can take their kids as 75% of the time my dog is better behaved than the kids who screams "nonono" for 8 isles up and down in the target and the rents just let him scream instead of going home or for freaks sake apologizing to the people the kid is driving nuts.



Autumn- this quote reminded me, DH and I watched a program on the Fine Living channel about Pet-friendly cities, restaurants, HOTELS! There are a lot of upscale hotels in NYC that accept pets and you should see the pet perks- There was also a car service, I believe in NY that taxied people with pets b/c a lot of the taxi services will not allowed the pets in the cars.....

They were also showing a couple who strated their own charter airline to fly people with pets who do not like to put the pets in the cargo area. This one I find hilarious- how many people on airplanes do you think would rather have someones pet in a carrier in the seat behind them, instead an annoying kid kicking their seat and crying....hmmmm.... kids in the cargo area...


----------



## tinkerbell of winter

I would say it is an individual decision, either way is fine, with or without kids. I know that I wouldn't want any more children, I have one ten year daughter whom I love dearly but who it has been a real struggle to raise all alone without much help from her father. I know how the people without children feel when it comes to liking to have money for travel, etc.. That is why I work an extra job and live on the cheap 95% of the year, so that 5% that I am on vacation can be great! I can't imagine having anymore children, as I wouldn't want to take away from my daughter in terms of opportunites I want to give her. On the flip side, as a single parent I feel like I am sometimes looked down upon, because of that very fact. I would rather be single and struggle instead of remain in a bad marriage "for the kids". I have seen both firsthand, my cousins have been raised in that exact situation, and in my opinion they have not turned out well. I try and set a good example for my daughter, and show her that anything is possible if you work at it. So now that I have gone way off topic on a tangent, I think it is fine either way. Whatever makes you happy. There is definitely more freedom overall without children, and although I love my daughter, I also love the freedom that the summers bring when she is at her father's house. That is my "single" time, when I get to have "me" time and do grown up stuff. I have the best of both worlds, so I can relate to both sides of the coin.


----------



## maddhatir

aclov said:


> Madd -  you crack me up, I'm trying so hard not to laugh out loud!
> 
> Missed you over on the Budget Board too!



I miss all of my CF and freebie freaps too! 

UGH! all I can say is, Building an addition STINKS! Too many chiefs, not enough indians- I have to put people in their place and it is tiring me out  

I am tired of dirt on my floor, the smell of paint, the sight of Home Depot, drywall, concrete, hammers banging, shelling out cash to people! 

And the selfish part of me is TOTALLY POed that I cannot get on the freebie board to post freebies and my wench board to drool over Mr Depp! I AM SERIOUSLY JONESING- I AM HAVING MAJOR WITHDRAWLS!- fever, chills, screaming out Mr Depps name in my sleep! It's insanity! I am going to try and just sit on the sofa tonight with my laptop- a Becks Dark- ok, maybe a few of those and catch up on my internet life!

And! I can't wait until this is all over and DH and I can be in the same boat as Liisa, trying to decide which all inclusive we can go to for 2 WEEKS! (yes, DH said he is going to NEED 2 weeks to recoup! darn! ) so we can lie around all day in the sun, eat, drink champagne, shop, sleep, drink some more champagne, eat more, dip macaroons in chocolate did I leave anything out!


----------



## bulah1

Fritochips4u said:


> Nope, I'm not a troll, but thanks for the label...gotta love it.   I mainly lurk and read for informative purposes.
> 
> I just thought it was ironic that you all were saying how reading others' posts about kids made you all "so thankful" to be childfree....yet, the reason I come here and read this thread and the reason alot of people with FAMILIES come on here and read this thread is because it reaffirms, to me anyways, that I am SO SO SO SO SO SO glad that I DID have kids.
> 
> I read about the countless posts about dogs and cats and, while they are wonderful to have, it's sad when an ANIMAL becomes someone's life.  There was even a thread on here about someone took her BABY DOLL to Disney and posted pics.
> 
> Reading everyone's posts on here makes me sad that so many of you have nothing but a mangy mutt or feline.  It makes me sad because I know the joys of what I've experienced and to see someone put so much of their LIFE in an ANIMAL is very sad to me.  There's more to life than that.
> 
> I absolutely respect everyone's decision to not have children.  I think there are people that really should NOT have children.  BUT, to go to a families thread to read what we "complain" about...Very holier than thou.
> 
> I love my life, love my family and love my children with every fiber of my being.  It's very funny that everyone's saying "oooh, she must not be happy with her life...that's why she came here"...
> 
> I came here for the same reasons ya'll read the families thread.  This thread makes me MORE thankful that I have what I have.
> 
> Chrissy
> 5 kids



You're not a troll, huh? Very interesting you never replied to my direct response to you back here: http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=914101&page=112

And WHO has the "holier-than-thou" attitude here?  I really feel so sorry for you that this is the only way you can fill your empty life - by having children and then impressing upon us that our lives must be just as empty as yours if we all need kids too.  I'm sorry I have to say it now because I've held my lip about - I don't like 'attacking' people as you seem to thrive from.  You do realize that if you take an honest look at your life you will probably find some serious problems that you are taking out on us because you 'think' children is the answer to everything.  Sorry, that's just not an option for some of us.  Are we damned to hell in that case?

OK - to all of the rest of you out there who are actually trying to hold a legitimate conversation on this topic -  
I think it's time we just start IGNORING this half-wit (yes, I made an insult...   I'm sorry) and let her vent.  If she's been reported, we will wait it out (until she makes a new logon for herself to come here under! LOL).  She obviously has nothing important to say, so just ignore it and let's try to move on to more civilized discussion...

OH MY - but are we childless ones capable of such??? LMAO!!  
Sorry, just feeling a tinge of the sarcasm that Frito butt must insist of dishing out.  

Frito... of course, you must be right.  We are all WRONG... you win.
      
Give me a break.

And by the way, there are actual studies that show people who dislike or are unkind to animals are increasingly likely to become involved in criminal actions (as opposed to those that do like animals...) - and an interesting link you should look at, might explain some of your harsh criticisms of others simply based on your views of animals... but what do I know... interesting quick read... http://www.nahee.org/research_evaluation/PDF/Kindness%20to%20People%20and%20Animals.pdf


----------



## Muushka

Yes.  I was so wrong to not have children.  What was I thinking?  Now it is too late.  I see the error of my ways.

Now what am I going to do with my cats?


----------



## KirklandTutu

HockeyKat said:


> Hey Kirk, have you thought of volunteering at the animal shelter?  If you are bothered by kill shelters you could always find a no-kill.  Just keep a pair of clothes that is "shelter" clothes, would even be better if you could find a place with a shower and such so you could shower and change before coming home.



I've actually thought about that before.  However between running my own ballet school, teaching there full time, still dancing in a semi-professional company, and volunteering for local outreach dance...somehow my empty life is filled up to the brim!  haha, j/k.   I think if I added anything else, my husband would kill me.  

During the summers when I'm on break things get a bit lonely.  I go from being around students and fellow dancers non stop to being in the house by myself most of the day.  I'm still working, for those of you with your own businesses, we all know that the work never actually stops, it's just being alone in the house paper work sort of thing (disboards are a great distraction, I should really turn off the email alert though...i'd probably get more work done).  After about a week of that I just want a cat in my lap while I type away.

Meanwhile...I have to get back to making drums (20 of em) from oatmeal containers.  Just because I don't have kids doesn't mean that I can't have cool projects too!


----------



## bulah1

maddhatir said:


> Autumn- this quote reminded me, DH and I watched a program on the Fine Living channel about Pet-friendly cities, restaurants, HOTELS! There are a lot of upscale hotels in NYC that accept pets and you should see the pet perks- There was also a car service, I believe in NY that taxied people with pets b/c a lot of the taxi services will not allowed the pets in the cars.....
> 
> They were also showing a couple who strated their own charter airline to fly people with pets who do not like to put the pets in the cargo area. This one I find hilarious- how many people on airplanes do you think would rather have someones pet in a carrier in the seat behind them, instead an annoying kid kicking their seat and crying....hmmmm.... kids in the cargo area...



OMG! I totally would do this!! LOL.  I even thought about bringing my little fellow with to Disney, but I didn't want to do that to him and not spend time with him.  But my job (as it picks up) will require me to travel more and more by air, and I'd love to bring him along.  I just never wanted to stick him in cargo! THAT IS NOT RIGHT! In my opinion.  If you know what the company is - please put the info down! That is too cool.

And for all of you pet people out there who care, I'm gonna share pics of my fur babies (and I think anyone else who's proud of their "other non-people children of any sort" should post their pics as well...  





This is my fur-baby Booker.  He was with me from childhood, and I recently had to put him to sleep because he had cancer.  He was the most intelligent person I knew (more than some people I know! LOL), so I really did refer to him as a person. He was 16, and we're coming up on 1 year without him in NOV.  I miss him so.





This is my new baby boy, Frodo.  He's got some big shoes to fill, but he's coming along nicely.  Still pretty cat-like, but we're working on that.  He is a gentle giant, big boy - but sweet as can be.  

More baby pics from you guys please!!


----------



## Hixski

*BULAH1*: Your kitties are very cute. Sorry about Booker. I have been there done that.  I have posted this pic of Duncan before but I will post it again. He looks very handsome in this pic so this is the one I post.

*MADD*: Thanks for sticking up for Duncan!!!! He says you can be his adopted aunt in Jersey anytime. Hope you get your addition done soon. You will NEED that vacation by then. 

Duncan is still insulted anyone would call him a mangy mutt. He loves everyone but in this case I am sure he would make an exception.


----------



## bulah1

Hixski said:


> *BULAH1*: Your kitties are very cute. Sorry about Booker. I have been there done that.  I have posted this pic of Duncan before but I will post it again. He looks very handsome in this pic so this is the one I post.
> 
> Duncan is still insulted anyone would call him a mangy mutt. He loves everyone but in this case I am sure he would make an exception.
> 
> [/IMG]



I love the spot on his tongue! Retrievers are so sweet and great with their people!  They can get pretty protective too of their people... so meanies, lookout!!  

When we get to move into a more suitable home, I'd like to make a puppy addition to our family.  Probably a shepherd, that's what we seem to be leaning towards.

Thanks for the pic! Keep 'em coming! (Fur babies or otherwise all you kidless peeps!)


----------



## Tow Mater Wannabe

I've been a lurker for a while but had to say that I've been following this thread since it started.  It always makes me feel good when it goes back in a happy direction.  Love those pics too!!


----------



## HockeyKat

Here is Trinity:





We got her from the shelter when she was 2.5... she came all-4-paw-declawed which is unusual.   She is 6 now and the sweetest, least aggressive animal I have ever encountered.


----------



## ObsessedwiththeMouse

HockeyKat said:


> Here is Trinity:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> We got her from the shelter when she was 2.5... she came all-4-paw-declawed which is unusual.   She is 6 now and the sweetest, least aggressive animal I have ever encountered.



Oh my goodness!  She is a beautiful cat!  I wish I wasn't allergic!


----------



## KirklandTutu

Can I share all those that I love?  not pets necessarily...lol  But they take up alot of time and energy, and I get to dress them up twice  a year!  (this was at dress rehersal for final bows, don't judge their form too harshly!...I almost messed up and put the pic of the one girl with the dress over her head up)


----------



## Muushka

Below is my newest addition to the family.  She had hung on my back porch for 6 years and I did not realize she was homeless (believe me, she looked great, someone must have been feeding her).  Come to find out she was also a feral cat, very wild.  When I realized what kind of a cat she was, I slowly got her to trust me.  The following is Lucy:






You can't see her ear clipped, but her left upper ear was clipped when the people who spay ferals spayed her (thank goodness).  She is one of the best cats I have ever cared for.  But the poor vet, when he has to vaccinate her, it is not pretty.


----------



## HockeyKat

Thanks OM!!

Awwww... Muushka she is gorgeous!!  

My cat is the exact opposite!  She spends her time at the vet getting as low and small as possible.  You can almost hear her chanting to herself "this isn't happening... this isn't happening...."

We have a fluffity outside cat that we feed.  Our nbors put her outside when they had a child, and I don't think they feed her, and I just can't let a cat starve.  We would take her in except I don't know how she would mix with Trinity since she has all her claws.  I have trouble justifying declawing a cat, especially as an adult.  I just adopt them as pre-declawed adult kitties instead!   

I think a few other strays in the nborhood feed from that dish too... we are a soup kitchen for cats!


----------



## momomonster

Here is the ruler of our domain. You can tell she is the ruler because this is the face I saw when we redecorated the hall bathroom _without her permission_!


----------



## momomonster

MoMo, the quirkiest kitty in the world. She pokes you with her paw when she wants petties and now she's taught all the other cats to do it!


----------



## momomonster




----------



## HockeyKat

Oh my goodness!!!   

Three white kitties in one thread!  I LOVE the face.  And the box picture!  Cuteness overload!   

(... _did I mention that I am a cat fanatic?? _)


----------



## momomonster




----------



## momomonster

HockeyKat said:


> My cat is the exact opposite!  She spends her time at the vet getting as low and small as possible.  You can almost hear her chanting to herself "this isn't happening... this isn't happening...."



   

My four cats are no fans of vets, either. Earlier this year I got the bright idea to bring a mobile vet in because I figured they would be less freaked-out if they were seen here at home- NOT! It was 10X worse, as if they'd been *violated* in their own home. You should have seen the fur flying everywhere!

  

Thanks, ya'll, for starting the weekend off nicely.


----------



## kennancat

Tow Mater Wannabe said:


> I've been a lurker for a while but had to say that I've been following this thread since it started.  It always makes me feel good when it goes back in a happy direction.  Love those pics too!!


Have to say, I love the "Earning my Tow Hook"!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> *BULAH1*: *MADD*: Thanks for sticking up for Duncan!!!! He says you can be his adopted aunt in Jersey anytime.



awwww- It would be an honor!

Everybody's kitties are so precious and beautiful!   

I will need to get some pics of, our, um, mom's kitties  and post them- they are both all white with a few black spots Japanese Bobtails. We used to share the kitties but mom moved out (she lived with me for a few years) and it was better she took them b/c DH was getting really bad with allergies and asthma- 

I still see them though. and........mom is moving back to our house, that is who the addition is for- so I will be seeing even more of the kitties!


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> Can I share all those that I love?  not pets necessarily...lol  But they take up alot of time and energy, and I get to dress them up twice  a year!  (this was at dress rehersal for final bows, don't judge their form too harshly!...I almost messed up and put the pic of the one girl with the dress over her head up)



So- do you teach the kids ballet???

I have been to a few of my niece's dance recitals, she is 5 now. I love watching the ballet dancers, oh and the 4 and 5 year olds trying to keep in step with each other!


----------



## KirklandTutu

maddhatir said:


> So- do you teach the kids ballet???
> 
> I have been to a few of my niece's dance recitals, she is 5 now. I love watching the ballet dancers, oh and the 4 and 5 year olds trying to keep in step with each other!




Well, the 4 and 5 year olds have one mission, to be cute.  If they manage to be in sinc with each other, the effect is totally ruined!  If we're getting technical about it, we don't teach them ballet until they're about 8, before that it's helping them along in a fun way with childhood development--but that's a whole other story and science.  

Meanwhile I'll leave you with the memory of the little girl who pee'd on stage...


----------



## Muushka

HockeyKat said:


> Thanks OM!!
> 
> Awwww... Muushka she is gorgeous!!
> 
> My cat is the exact opposite!  She spends her time at the vet getting as low and small as possible.  You can almost hear her chanting to herself "this isn't happening... this isn't happening...."
> 
> We have a fluffity outside cat that we feed.  Our nbors put her outside when they had a child, and I don't think they feed her, and I just can't let a cat starve.  We would take her in except I don't know how she would mix with Trinity since she has all her claws.  I have trouble justifying declawing a cat, especially as an adult.  I just adopt them as pre-declawed adult kitties instead!
> 
> I think a few other strays in the nborhood feed from that dish too... we are a soup kitchen for cats!



Awww I love that you feed all the hungry kitties.  They appreciate it so!

When we get 'trolled' lets just post pictures of our pets!  That will throw them!


----------



## Hixski

Muushka said:


> Awww I love that you feed all the hungry kitties.  They appreciate it so!
> 
> When we get 'trolled' lets just post pictures of our pets!  That will throw them!



No, it will just reenforce in their minds what they are already thinking. How pathetic we are.  My dog Duncan is still insulted that he was referred to as a mangy mutt.


----------



## Muushka

Hixski said:


> No, it will just reenforce in their minds what they are already thinking. How pathetic we are.  My dog Duncan is still insulted that he was referred to as a mangy mutt.



I really don't care!  What better way to irritate than with a bunch of pet pictures!   

Poor Duncan. Cover his little ears!  
I have to limit my cats with their internet time.


----------



## momomonster

Hixski said:


> My dog Duncan is still insulted that he was referred to as a mangy mutt.



You can tell Duncan that this "crazy cat lady" thinks he's absolutely adorable. Not only that, he looks very sweet and happy! 

But you know, the troll was just having a _discussion_ with us.


----------



## KRIS10420

I had posted in this thread near the beginning and have been following ever since. DH and I are very happy being child free and receive much enjoyment and entertainment from our furbabies.
This one is Bodie 
http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m317/kris10420/bodie1.jpg
This one is Kelso
http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m317/kris10420/kelso1.jpg


----------



## kennancat

I went to get my hair cut this morning (chopped off 10" to donate to locks of love, btw - more of that pathetic, self-centered childfree lifestyle ) and ended up talking about kids with my hairdresser. She is childfree and always has been - I told her that I was jealous that she knew decidedly what she wanted! I mentioned our thread and the occasional trolls we get and it was almost funny how perplexed she was by that. She just couldn't get why other people would get their knickers in a twist over it. I told her we didn't understand it either.


----------



## Quinn222

I recently found this thread and have enjoyed it very much (other than the trolls of course.) I went to a baby shower today. I'm really happy for my friend but it's not for me. I muttered, "I don't have a single regret about not having kids." and my friend next to me muttered right back, "Same here." Nice to have some like minded folks here!

Here's my boy (Dandy) to add to the 'family' album:


----------



## ChisJo

Quinn222 said:


> Here's my boy (Dandy) to add to the 'family' album:



What qa beautiful picture!!! Now, when I figure out how to post pics, I will post a pic of my beautiful baby!!


----------



## maddhatir

Quinn222 said:


> I recently found this thread and have enjoyed it very much (other than the trolls of course.) I went to a baby shower today. I'm really happy for my friend but it's not for me. I muttered, "I don't have a single regret about not having kids." and my friend next to me muttered right back, "Same here." Nice to have some like minded folks here!
> 
> Here's my boy (Dandy) to add to the 'family' album:



OMG- How adorable!.... he looks like he is peeking out and saying "what?!"


----------



## maddhatir

KRIS10420 said:


> I had posted in this thread near the beginning and have been following ever since. DH and I are very happy being child free and receive much enjoyment and entertainment from our furbabies.
> This one is Bodie
> http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m317/kris10420/bodie1.jpg
> This one is Kelso
> http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m317/kris10420/kelso1.jpg



Bodie and Kelso are adorable!!!!


----------



## PoohBear321

I just came across this thread and wanted to say that I think everyone should be respected for whatever decisions they make concerning having children or not having children.  I myself have one son...almost 2...that I adore and I wouldn't change being his mom for anything.  We tried several years to have a child and thought we'd never be parents.  Started adoption paperwork and within a few months had a beautiful one week old baby boy that we love to pieces.  But I must admit that having kids does put strains on your marriage...at least it did mine especially in those sleep deprived early months...and it's definately not for everyone.  I've been best friends with someone for 17 years now and we used to see each other all the time and go wherever whenever.  I saw her a bit less when I got married and moved farther away and since I became a mom I'm lucky if I see her every 3 months.  She has her life and her single friends and I'm a stay at home mom with an active toddler to take care of.  As much as I love my son and wouldn't change having him for anything I do miss the freedom that I had when I didn't have him.  I'm also constantly bombarded with:
Are you planning on any more?
You DO plan on adopting again don't you?
You know he really NEEDS a sibling
When will you give him a brother or sister?
Why do you only have one?

So I understand the pressure and annoyance.  The 4+ years we tried I was constantly asked when/if we were having kids.  When it looked for a while as though we wouldn't have any and I told people that they were horrified.  I'm not one who thinks that just because I have a son and am happy with my choice to be a mother that I need to convince the whole world to have kids too.  Personally I know too many people who should never have had kids that only had them because it was expected of them.  My husband and I have friends who have been married a few years and are constantly asked.  They tell people they're perfectly happy with just the two of them and their furbaby.  I don't ask...I figure if someone chooses to talk to me about having kids or not having them that's fine but it's none of my damn business to go poking my nose into anyone's private life or question their choices.


----------



## CampbellScot

I've lurked on this thread for ages. I have always found it very interesting and thought provoking!

I'm in an odd situation as I don't have kids of my own, but I am a step mom to an 8 year old girl and 5 year old boy. They were 5 and 2 when I came into their lives. I am a "part time" mom...my step kids keep asking when I'm going to "get a baby" and could I please "hurry and have a sister..."  

The thing is, I'm not sure I want to be a "real" mom. Everyone assumes that b/c I'm a step parent I must be chomping at the bit to have some of my own. If anything, step parenting has been great birth control! Don't get me wrong, I love the kids to pieces. They are GREAT. I enjoy them most of the time. But I see how kids that aren't even MINE have strained my very young marriage...I can't imagine having one of my own. It's good to know I am not alone in this train of thought!!!

I'm actually one of those really bad people who enjoys going to Disney WITHOUT my step kids! (see if you admit that in any other thread on any other board you are bombarded with the  or the ever judgmental  )


----------



## plgrn

Hi Guys! I've just been lurking a little since DH and I decided to be child-less instead of child-free, but since we are talking furbabies, mind if I join in?

This is our Boxer Casey





All tuckered out after his playdate (which most people we know think is ridiculous that we even take him to!)  





My 14 year old Krissy





My 2 year old Chewie





The newest additions are Daisy and her nameless, feral babies who we were able to get spayed/neutered with the help of a rescue organization and are now feeding.






Thanks guys!   I love to gush about my babies and most people either look at me like I'm crazy or give me that condescending smirk like "oh just wait until you have a REAL kids."


----------



## plgrn

OMG! I just noticed what got this whole furbaby discussion going. Geez. Somebody must have a Frito wedged in a very uncomfortable place to be that irritable.  




Fritochips4u said:


> There was even a thread on here about someone took her BABY DOLL to Disney and posted pics.



Guess I fit into that category! Mom and I took our Build-A-Bears to EPCOT for Teddy Bear and Doll Festival. Aren't they darling in their Disney princess costumes?  












And just for you Madd...


----------



## plgrn

bulah1 said:


> :
> This is my fur-baby Booker.  He was with me from childhood, and I recently had to put him to sleep because he had cancer.  He was the most intelligent person I knew (more than some people I know! LOL), so I really did refer to him as a person. He was 16, and we're coming up on 1 year without him in NOV.  I miss him so.



 You can tell how smart he is by looking into his eyes!



HockeyKat said:


> Here is Trinity:



She looks EXACTLY like my childhood cat Coconut.



Muushka said:


> Below is my newest addition to the family.  She had hung on my back porch for 6 years and I did not realize she was homeless (believe me, she looked great, someone must have been feeding her).  Come to find out she was also a feral cat, very wild.  When I realized what kind of a cat she was, I slowly got her to trust me.



Wow. It takes a special person to tame a feral!



momomonster said:


> MoMo, the quirkiest kitty in the world. She pokes you with her paw when she wants petties and now she's taught all the other cats to do it!



How sweet! She looks a lot like my Krissy. Gotta love a tortie!


----------



## PoohBear321

That is tooo cute!  I love the princess costumes...pirate one is cute too.  DH and I just LOVE to go to Build-A-Bear.  I have several and the kiddo already has two and wants to go make a cat this time.  Did you find the princess costumes at Build-A-Bear or someplace else?

I'll have to see if I can find some good pictures of my furbaby .  Sadly I had to leave her with my mom when I got married...DH has allergies...and she passed away a few years ago.  I still miss her.


----------



## plgrn

Yep, the outfits all came from Build-A-Bear. I really want a Mulan costume, but they can only be found on Ebay now. 

Allergies are such a shame. I feel sorry for everyone who loves animals but can't enjoy them as much as they would like.


----------



## jaksmommy

I am so impressed by your decision.  I have seen quite a few parents that probably shouldn't be.  I have also known 2 couples that made the same decision and never regretted it.  More power to you!


----------



## Muushka

CampbellScot said:


> I've lurked on this thread for ages. I have always found it very interesting and thought provoking!
> 
> I'm in an odd situation as I don't have kids of my own, but I am a step mom to an 8 year old girl and 5 year old boy. They were 5 and 2 when I came into their lives. I am a "part time" mom...my step kids keep asking when I'm going to "get a baby" and could I please "hurry and have a sister..."
> 
> The thing is, I'm not sure I want to be a "real" mom. Everyone assumes that b/c I'm a step parent I must be chomping at the bit to have some of my own. If anything, step parenting has been great birth control! Don't get me wrong, I love the kids to pieces. They are GREAT. I enjoy them most of the time. But I see how kids that aren't even MINE have strained my very young marriage...I can't imagine having one of my own. It's good to know I am not alone in this train of thought!!!
> 
> I'm actually one of those really bad people who enjoys going to Disney WITHOUT my step kids! (see if you admit that in any other thread on any other board you are bombarded with the  or the ever judgmental  )



You are certainly in a different position.  But I kind of know what you are going thru (but mine was much easier!).  When my sister had her children, I loved them to pieces.  But at the same time they made me realize that I did not want to have any of my own.  Way too much work!  And now that they are all grown up (her kids) I REALLY am glad I made the decision that I did.  



plgrn said:


> Hi Guys! I've just been lurking a little since DH and I decided to be child-less instead of child-free, but since we are talking furbabies, mind if I join in?
> 
> 
> The newest additions are Daisy and her nameless, feral babies who we were able to get spayed/neutered with the help of a rescue organization and are now feeding.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Thanks guys!   I love to gush about my babies and most people either look at me like I'm crazy or give me that condescending smirk like "oh just wait until you have a REAL kids."



Awwww.  Feral kitties.  Once you win them over, they will be the greatest pets that you can ever imagine.  What a kind soul you are!



plgrn said:


> OMG! I just noticed what got this whole furbaby discussion going. Geez. Somebody must have a Frito wedged in a very uncomfortable place to be that irritable.



That is why I suggested that when we get trolled, we should ignore and post pictures of "our children". Notice that she has not been back?


----------



## zima-cheryl

I have got to get in on this showing off too.
We have 4 fur-babies (3 cats & 1 dog):





Boots is the youngest of the "kids".  At 4 years he still has gobs of energy.  





Stutter is convinced she is queen of the house & DH and I are just the domestics.  I can't believe I'm competing w/a cat to see who is really the top gal around here.





Tiger (cat) is the resident chicken!  And poor Ginger (our dog) is way out numbered...she is just too good natured to care.





This is my "niece" Maxine (my brother's dog) who any day now is going to find herself spirited off to "aunties" house for an extended visit!


----------



## zima-cheryl

plgrn said:


> Guess I fit into that category! Mom and I took our Build-A-Bears to EPCOT for Teddy Bear and Doll Festival. Aren't they darling in their Disney princess costumes?



The bears are toooo cute!

And I have to say - this is one of those things you have to love about Disney!
No matter what your age, they play along and even encourage you.  
If you are having fun and being young at heart, they go with it.  
Where else would you find people willing to pose like this w/someone's bears?  Or understand why two adults want to have breakfast w/Pooh?  Or why I need a new sticker every day to wear?  Or why we wave at characters (and they wave back)?  

Only at Disney!  And that is one of the things that make it so great!


----------



## PatriciaH

CJK said:


> Dh and I are in our mid 30's and have no children.  We're not absolutely positive that we won't have any, but with each passing year we're getting closer to that decision.  My question relates to your friends.  I am now down to ONE female friend who does not have children and does not plan to have children.  Two other very close friends don't have children yet, but are actively trying now.
> 
> How do you handle having no (or very few) friends without children?  I don't mind visiting with children from time to time (I don't dislike kids, I just don't know if they're right for me..).  I find myself very tearful these days.  When my two dear friends announced that they're now trying to have a baby (after sitting on the fence for years), I put on a brave face for them, but once behind closed doors, I sobbed.  I genuinely am happy for them for doing what makes them happy, but selfishly, I'm mourning the friendships I once had.  ALL of my friendships with other friends who have children, have understandably changed. The dynamic is undeniably different.  I don't blame anybody, that's just the way it has to be.
> 
> Am I alone in feeling lonely/left behind?  Do all of you deal with it better, or have you gone out and actively met other like-minded people (ie. No Kidding group)? I'm thinking of joining the local chapter in our area.  I just miss the care-free days of getting together with friends.  These days, children are almost always involved (which, again, I don't mind sometimes....but it's now at least 95% of the time).  I feel like I'm in mourning, but I feel guilty admitting that...
> 
> I probably sound terribly selfish and I'm sorry for that.  Do any of you feel similarly?




We are SO lucky because we have three married couples we are friends with that are also child-free. We also have many single and gay friends here that do not want children. We have only one friend in FL that has a child and she is 13 and off on her own a lot. One other one wants children some day and she is the odd man out We have a great group of people that love hanging out and really get along. It is not unusual to go out in a group of 6+. The only other friends of mine that have children live far away (and sadly all of them but one couple are divorced!)


----------



## aclov

This past week was just proof that there are SO many ignorant people in this world.   Between the Frito-Lay Lady with her comments and yesterday I had an incident at CVS.    There was this woman screaming at her daughter around 9 to hurry up and push the cart.    When I pass the aisle, I gave her a dirty look and guess what?   She called me the B**** word and made some other rude remark, in front of her daughter.  Real nice example, huh?  Well, I decided to ignore her and than I went to the freezer to get some gatorade and got really upset.   So I went to the front to look for her but she was gone.   Now, I'm really mad at myself for not saying anything to her         I'm not a confrontational person but it's really gotten to me how I let her say something like that especially in front of a child.      I couldn't sleep last night and I keep replaying the stupid thing in my head with I should have said this, I should have said that.   I have such a stomach ache.   I know I shouldn't let stupid people get to me, but I can't shake it off.     It makes me sad and more mad for the little girl that has such an awful mother.


----------



## Liisa

I'm with Madd... DH and I got busy on some outdoor projects this weekend and I missed the chip woman and the pet picture posting.  I'm kind of glad I missed the chip woman.  My two are definitely NOT mangy mutts.  In fact, Pari (my royal princess - we are simply her butler and maid) would be very put out by that statement.  Khabo could care less, he's too easy going to let anything bother him.  I owe you guys pics.  I posted some of Khabo quite a while ago (when we first adopted him after my Yeti passed away - see my avatar).  He was about 30 pounds when we got him at 4 months old.  He just turned 10 month and is already a whopping 95 pounds.  He's enourmous!!!!  Luckily he falls in love with everyone and everything. 

I'll post up some pics tonight.

And, BTW, for you allergic people... Tibetans have hair not fur and are allergy free!  (Of course, then you have to get over the idea of having a 120-140 pound fur-kid in your home!!!)


----------



## PatriciaH

aclov said:


> This past week was just proof that there are SO many ignorant people in this world.   Between the Frito-Lay Lady with her comments and yesterday I had an incident at CVS.    There was this woman screaming at her daughter around 9 to hurry up and push the cart.    When I pass the aisle, I gave her a dirty look and guess what?   She called me the B**** word and made some other rude remark, in front of her daughter.  Real nice example, huh?  Well, I decided to ignore her and than I went to the freezer to get some gatorade and got really upset.   So I went to the front to look for her but she was gone.   Now, I'm really mad at myself for not saying anything to her         I'm not a confrontational person but it's really gotten to me how I let her say something like that especially in front of a child.      I couldn't sleep last night and I keep replaying the stupid thing in my head with I should have said this, I should have said that.   I have such a stomach ache.   I know I shouldn't let stupid people get to me, but I can't shake it off.     It makes me sad and more mad for the little girl that has such an awful mother.



People are crazy. Just know that there are a LOT of very unhappy people with kids out there. truemomconfessions.com and truedadconfessions.com (and the news) prove it. Those families are train wrecks waiting to happen. Parents may insist they are SO THRILLED with their lives but most of them we know are not.


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> And, BTW, for you allergic people... Tibetans have hair not fur and are allergy free!  (Of course, then you have to get over the idea of having a 120-140 pound fur-kid in your home!!!)



Hey Lis!

What stinks is, I am allergic to their saliva So when they lick their hair/fur- it is all downhill after that 

It would kill me to take a chance getting a pet, be allergic and then have to get rid of it.   I could never fathom how people can do that- 

Get a pet, and for some unforseen reason, get rid of it. To me, I would think the feeling of giving up a pet would be like getting rid of one of your kids.....which may actually be easier than a pet 

I know some people give the "excuse" that- well, we are now having a child and I do not want the dog near the baby- WHAT??! Or- we are moving and they do not take pets-- hello? I would find another place to live. I do not want to hear- it is not that easy! 

My niece adopted a Chow/Pit Bull mix about 7 years ago and he is THE most mellow pup- well, when it comes to people he is mellow. When he is left alone he chews doors, widow screens, mmmmm OK everything in sight! He has abandonment issues. One time they left him alone- he jumped out of the upstairs window- onto the roof! 

Anyway- 2 years ago she had a baby. Her and her DH never even entertained the idea of getting rid of the dog b/c he is family! You should have heard the people telling her and her DH to get rid of the dog! Like he was disposable! I would get FURIOUS when someone would say it in front of me!!!! How DARE they!? It would come out of their mouths like nothing. No thought involved.

Well, she still has the pup and her little boy jumps all over him, pulls his ears etc and the pup just lays there like, OMG someone please save me and get rid of the KID, is there a w ay we can send him back where he came form!   I liked it better when I was an only "child" 

The pup is VERY protective of her and her son too. 

Can't wait to see pics of how big  Khabo is getting!

I just got a very sad e-mail a few days ago- we used to live in a condo and our neighbor had a beautiful dog, Duchess- I am not sure what kind of dog she was- she looked kind of like a long haired German Shepherd- Well, they moved to CO last year.

The e-mail broke the news that they had to put her down b/c of Hip dysplasia- she had it on one side which made her favor the other hip- but she then got it in the other hip and she could not even walk! She was so precious and sweet!


----------



## maddhatir

PatriciaH said:


> People are crazy. Just know that there are a LOT of very unhappy people with kids out there. truemomconfessions.com and truedadconfessions.com (and the news) prove it. Those families are train wrecks waiting to happen. Parents may insist they are SO THRILLED with their lives but most of them we know are not.



What IS wrong with people anymore????

People seem like they just know nothing but HOW to be rude! Where are the courtious people at??? Well, usually WE all seem to gather in one place and complain about the rude people while the rude people lurk 

You never see just small random acts of kindness anymore. Anytime I go out- I will be nice to people, the usual, please, thank you, hold a door- let people into traffic, if I have more items than you and you have one or two in the gorcery store I will let you in front of me!! - 

The other day, DH and I were in a parking lot and getting on our bike, there was an older woman putting gorceries in her car and her empty cart started coming towards our bike. She said she was sorry, DH said not a problem and took her cart- walked a ways to the cart return and put it in there for her. Just yesterday, He was in the grocery store and he saw a woman who could not reach the top shelf so he ran up and helped her get what she wanted. If he is @ Home Depot and someone is trying to put something in their truck etc- he will go over and help them lift it! Why is it that most people do not do those thoughtful things anymore. They just look the other way. When he does them- the people do not know how to respond, of course, they do say thank you, b/c no one is used to kindness anymore! 

Sure there ARE people out there who do help- but, they are getting few and far in between! It is sad. 

wait- what does this have to do with kids???-- OH YEAH- what is it? LEARN BY EXAMPLE!


----------



## druidia

Frito FruitLoop wasn't bugging me until she referred to furbabies as "mangy mutt(s) and feline(s)."   

Methinks someone should figure out how to use BC.  We don't need any more serial killers in this world who started out being taught by their parents that an animal's life is worthless.   

My oh-so-beautiful and very precious furbabies, Motor & Stitch, both rescue-kitties:


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> What IS wrong with people anymore????
> 
> People seem like they just know nothing but HOW to be rude! Where are the courtious people at??? Well, usually WE all seem to gather in one place and complain about the rude people while the rude people lurk
> 
> You never see just small random acts of kindness anymore. Anytime I go out- I will be nice to people, the usual, please, thank you, hold a door- let people into traffic, if I have more items than you and you have one or two in the gorcery store I will let you in front of me!! -
> 
> The other day, DH and I were in a parking lot and getting on our bike, there was an older woman putting gorceries in her car and her empty cart started coming towards our bike. She said she was sorry, DH said not a problem and took her cart- walked a ways to the cart return and put it in there for her. Just yesterday, He was in the grocery store and he saw a woman who could not reach the top shelf so he ran up and helped her get what she wanted. If he is @ Home Depot and someone is trying to put something in their truck etc- he will go over and help them lift it! Why is it that most people do not do those thoughtful things anymore. They just look the other way. When he does them- the people do not know how to respond, of course, they do say thank you, b/c no one is used to kindness anymore!
> 
> Sure there ARE people out there who do help- but, they are getting few and far in between! It is sad.
> 
> wait- what does this have to do with kids???-- OH YEAH- what is it? LEARN BY EXAMPLE!




Your DH is just like mine Madd!!!! DH is the big bad a** looking guy who all the little old ladies love. His mother is 93 so she is a little old lady but he treats everyone like that. He is always the one to hold a door and what not. Of course he gets a little ticked when someone just goes ahead and shoves through a door and does not even say thank you. It doesn't stop him though. It is usually the people under 35-40 that act like he should hold the door for them. He has put stuff in peoples cars for them more times than I can count.

The thing that bugs us the most is the fact that it is people our age that are raising this incredibly rude and selfish (me ,me, me) next generation coming up.(Not all but alot, I don't need points)


----------



## Liisa

Madd,

I know what you mean about the saliva.  My niece is allergic to saliva as well and Khabo is a licker.  Poor thing gets a welt whenever he puts his tongue on her.  

For all, I uploaded pics of my two "kids"... we used to have a cat - a black and white tuxedo named Sheba, but Khabo played too rough with her so "grandma" took Sheba.  After 14 years of life with dogs, that kitty is living the lap of luxury.  My mom even warms up her wet food for her.  Talk about spoiled!!!  (after 14 years, she deserves it!)

This is Khabo - I'm not sure this gives a good depiction of his size.  I didn't have a pic of him standing next to a person, but he is TALL.  When he fills out and gets his big adult coat on, he's going to be very handsome.






And this is Pari, our 4 year old.  I'm totally biased (being her mom and all), but I think she is such a pretty girl.  And her tail is this beautiful plume of fur.  I think she knows she's pretty, she has that "boy, are you lucky to live with me" attitude!






And, for good measure, this is my Yeti   ...who sadly passed away this January at 6 years.  I don't think you ever get over missing them, I still get sad when I think about him.  






Edited:  Ok... I've got 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 at the end... why am I showing links and not pics?


----------



## Liisa

aclov said:


> Well, I decided to ignore her and than I went to the freezer to get some gatorade and got really upset.



Aclov,

I'm the same way, I always think of the really good comebacks way too late.  I know when I go to Walmart or the grocery store, I do a lot of head shaking at what I see.  When we were little, if my parents had to tell us to do something more than once, we knew we were in for it.  How often do you see a parent saying "Jimmy, I said get over here.  I mean it, put that down and come here right now.  This is the last time, I'm not kidding, come here..." and over and over and over!!!   Gee, I wonder who runs the show these days!  

On the bright side, by not having a comeback, you were the bigger person (I know, there isn't much glory in that and I also would have preferred some scathing retort!)


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Madd,
> 
> I know what you mean about the saliva.  My niece is allergic to saliva as well and Khabo is a licker.  Poor thing gets a welt whenever he puts his tongue on her.
> 
> For all, I uploaded pics of my two "kids"... we used to have a cat - a black and white tuxedo named Sheba, but Khabo played too rough with her so "grandma" took Sheba.  After 14 years of life with dogs, that kitty is living the lap of luxury.  My mom even warms up her wet food for her.  Talk about spoiled!!!  (after 14 years, she deserves it!)
> 
> This is Khabo - I'm not sure this gives a good depiction of his size.  I didn't have a pic of him standing next to a person, but he is TALL.  When he fills out and gets his big adult coat on, he's going to be very handsome.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> And this is Pari, our 4 year old.  I'm totally biased (being her mom and all), but I think she is such a pretty girl.  And her tail is this beautiful plume of fur.  I think she knows she's pretty, she has that "boy, are you lucky to live with me" attitude!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> And, for good measure, this is my Yeti   ...who sadly passed away this January at 6 years.  I don't think you ever get over missing them, I still get sad when I think about him.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Edited:  Ok... I've got
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> at the end... why am I showing links and not pics?



Lis- Not sure why the pics are not showing up- But I clicked on the link and can see how beautiful they are!!!

OMG! Yeti's eyes! They seem like they can look right through you!


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> OMG! Yeti's eyes! They seem like they can look right through you!



Yup, if ever an animal had a soul...  He always seemed wise beyond his years.  Must be from that deeply religious Tibetan background and hanging out with all those monks!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Yup, if ever an animal had a soul...  He always seemed wise beyond his years.  Must be from that deeply religious Tibetan background and hanging out with all those monks!




That's GOTTA be it!!!!


----------



## aclov

You know LIFE is hard enough as it is and than you have to deal with crazy idiots.     Maybe I should have been born in "Little House on the Prairie" time???

I don't know if anyone caught SuperNanny yesterday, I was flipping channels.   And they had a mother who refused to listen to what Jo Frost the Nanny was advising.   Jo was getting so frustrated with her.   At one point, the mother was saying that Jo was being "too hard" on her.    Umm...your asking for help and than you don't do what your suppose to


----------



## maddhatir

aclov said:


> You know LIFE is hard enough as it is and than you have to deal with crazy idiots.     Maybe I should have been born in "Little House on the Prairie" time???
> 
> I don't know if anyone caught SuperNanny yesterday, I was flipping channels.   And they had a mother who refused to listen to what Jo Frost the Nanny was advising.   Jo was getting so frustrated with her.   At one point, the mother was saying that Jo was being "too hard" on her.    Umm...your asking for help and than you don't do what your suppose to



awwww! I HATE when they do that! I yell at the TV.

The mom gets an attitude and says things like- I am their mother- I know what is best, MY kids will NEVER do that, I tried already, blah, blah, blah


----------



## maddhatir

druidia said:


> Frito FruitLoop wasn't bugging me until she referred to furbabies as "mangy mutt(s) and feline(s)."
> 
> Methinks someone should figure out how to use BC.  We don't need any more serial killers in this world who started out being taught by their parents that an animal's life is worthless.
> 
> My oh-so-beautiful and very precious furbabies, Motor & Stitch, both rescue-kitties:




FRITO FRUITLOOP  AHHH! NOW THAT'S FUNNY.

Your kitties are adorable!


----------



## luvwinnie

Hi, all, just found this thread after being on the CHeerfully Childfree thread on the CB. DH and I are 39, married for 8 years and happily CF. I have 3 wonderful nieces I adore who are now 19, 20 and 22. I love being the "cool aunt". Whatever maternal instincts I do have are more than satisfied with being "mom" to our very spoiled 9 yr old Bulldog, Winnie, and our two fluffly felines, Tigger and Pepper, who are 11.


----------



## maddhatir

luvwinnie said:


> Hi, all, just found this thread after being on the CHeerfully Childfree thread on the CB. DH and I are 39, married for 8 years and happily CF. I have 3 wonderful nieces I adore who are now 19, 20 and 22. I love being the "cool aunt". Whatever maternal instincts I do have are more than satisfied with being "mom" to our very spoiled 9 yr old Bulldog, Winnie, and our two fluffly felines, Tigger and Pepper, who are 11.



Nice to meet you!


----------



## luvwinnie

maddhatir said:


> Nice to meet you!



Thanks! 

We are leaving for Vermont on Friday in our motorhome. Staying at an "adults only" campground on Lake Champlain. Anyone else have any trips coming up?


----------



## maddhatir

luvwinnie said:


> Thanks!
> 
> We are leaving for Vermont on Friday in our motorhome. Staying at an "adults only" campground on Lake Champlain. Anyone else have any trips coming up?



After our addition is finished (hopefully by Fall) DH wants to do (maybe) Mexico for 2 weeks- he needs some MAJOR R&R! 

We keep checking the discount travel site we use for some good deals- so it will be somewhere for 2 weeks!


----------



## Liisa

luvwinnie said:


> Thanks!
> 
> We are leaving for Vermont on Friday in our motorhome. Staying at an "adults only" campground on Lake Champlain. Anyone else have any trips coming up?




DH and I have a Disney trip planned for Sept (5 weeks and counting!!!)

Long-term - we are planning a May 2008 trip to Mexico and a July 2008 trip to LAke Placid, NY.  DH does triathlons and he wants to go up to support his buddies who are doing the Lake Placid Iron Man.  I, on the other hand, will be in the spa at the hotel.  I don't mind watching the triathlons, but he's planning on staying out there for 17 hours to watch.  That is just obsessive (says the wife as she peruses the DIS boards daily to get her "fix"   )

Oh - and welcome to our happy family!!!!


----------



## luvwinnie

Liisa said:


> DH and I have a Disney trip planned for Sept (5 weeks and counting!!!)
> 
> Long-term - we are planning a May 2008 trip to Mexico and a July 2008 trip to LAke Placid, NY.  DH does triathlons and he wants to go up to support his buddies who are doing the Lake Placid Iron Man.  I, on the other hand, will be in the spa at the hotel.  I don't mind watching the triathlons, but he's planning on staying out there for 17 hours to watch.  That is just obsessive (says the wife as she peruses the DIS boards daily to get her "fix"   )
> 
> Oh - and welcome to our happy family!!!!



I'm so impressed by people who can do triathlons, marathons, etc.  Lake Placid looks lovely, I haven't been there yet.


----------



## luvwinnie

maddhatir said:


> After our addition is finished (hopefully by Fall) DH wants to do (maybe) Mexico for 2 weeks- he needs some MAJOR R&R!
> 
> We keep checking the discount travel site we use for some good deals- so it will be somewhere for 2 weeks!



Oooh, I hope you get a great deal.


----------



## druidia

maddhatir said:


> FRITO FRUITLOOP  AHHH! NOW THAT'S FUNNY.
> 
> Your kitties are adorable!



Thanks, Madd!  We are completely crazy about them.  I want MORE, but DH thinks that 2 is enough!


----------



## momomonster

Four kitties is my _limit_, no exceptions. 

Seriously, though, the last rescue is a long-hair, so cleaning up after her has inspired me to stop at four. I adore them all, but they're certainly a handful.

Hey Liisa- we're heading to Disney late next month ourselves!  We're staying on the cheap, but I plan to visit most of the resorts while we're there- the Poly for Wishes & fruity drinks, maybe a lunchtime drink at the WL, dinner at the CG. . . I can *pretend* we're staying in the high-cotton joints.  

December is our big trip to Peru for our 10th anniversary. We'll be traveling around for almost two weeks and staying in a different place every night. This is not going to be a relaxing trip, that's for sure! But, we will see one of the seven wonders of the world- Machu Picchu! 

Happy travels!


----------



## Hixski

We are heading to Disney next month too! We have 1 night at BCV and then on to the 7 night DCL Eastern Caribbean cruise. We could have flown back on the Saturday we come back but decided to add another night. Our last night we are staying at SSR. I am looking for a job before we get laid off where I work. I am SOOOO needing a vacation right now. Job hunting is so stressfull!!!


----------



## Liisa

Hixski - good luck with the job search.  Changing jobs for any reason just plain stinks.  I'll cross my fingers for you.  At least you have the vacations to look forward to!!!

Momomonster - thank goodness for DVC or we'd be staying at cheaper accomodations, or travelling alot less!  I know we bought in at a pretty penny, but we feel like we are getting a "free vacation" every year.  Yup, I can rationalize anything in an irrational manner!


----------



## aclov

I see a few of us are heading to WDW next month!   I'll be there with my best friend and another friend staying at SSR for the first time.

Hixski -   good luck with the job hunting, I've been there.    I was downsized last year two weeks before a WDW trip.   I was off for almost a year mostly because I wanted to be, I could have probably gotten something sooner.    But I'm in such a better and nicer place, that it was well worth it.


----------



## Liisa

Ok... so should we say who's going when and where are you staying?   

I'll go first:

Sept 18 - 22  Boardwalk Villas  (first time at that DVC resort!)


----------



## aclov

I should have put the dates in my post 

Sept 9 - 13.

BWV is my home resort, I love that place.   But I can never go home!   I usually book last minute trips so I have to book in advance next time.

I booked this trip last month and Saratoga was the only thing available.   But I'm not complaining, it'll be my first stay there so I'm looking forward to it.


----------



## momomonster

We're arriving late Sept 25 and plan to head home the 30th. 

Dang! We're all like ships, passing in the night. Oh well, maybe next time. . .Enjoy your villas, ladies.


----------



## HockeyKat

We will be at BCV Sept 16-19 and BWV Sept 20-26.  I also just booked 2008 trips for Jan 27-31 at AKV and May 18-23 at BWV.  

Ahh, the fun of of a childfree lifestyle... the ability to go when kids are in school!!


----------



## Liisa

HockeyKat said:


> Ahh, the fun of of a childfree lifestyle... the ability to go when kids are in school!!




I agree!  Lines... what lines?   

Aclov - Wilderness Lodge is our home resort and we've never stayed there!  We walked through a couple years ago when it was decorated for Christmas...boy did it have a "wow" factor!  But DH loves the boardwalk / beach club area.  We are going again in December this year (taking my in-laws and niece and nephew) and staying at OKW - never stayed there either.  But I do love trying them all.


----------



## HockeyKat

We did Wilderness Lodge Villas in May... it was definitely WOW.  I didn't expect to be impressed as I am not really a lodge person, but I was.

Sept will be our first for BCV/BWV, and then Jan for AKV... we have done OKW and VWL.  I don't really have much desire to try out SSR, we might someday if we do a last minute short trip.  Although, we have our points pretty much over-borrowed at this point so I doubt that would happen unless we had a last min cancellation!

We leave one month from tomorrow!  I really, really need a vacation.


----------



## Muushka

We are going Sept 29 thru Oct 4.  We booked the free dining last year, so we are staying at ASMu.  But we are also going to try out SSR for a few days.  First time staying there.  We are VWL groupies!


----------



## bulah1

Muushka said:


> Below is my newest addition to the family.  She had hung on my back porch for 6 years and I did not realize she was homeless (believe me, she looked great, someone must have been feeding her).  Come to find out she was also a feral cat, very wild.  When I realized what kind of a cat she was, I slowly got her to trust me.
> 
> You can't see her ear clipped, but her left upper ear was clipped when the people who spay ferals spayed her (thank goodness).  She is one of the best cats I have ever cared for.  But the poor vet, when he has to vaccinate her, it is not pretty.



I give anyone who can take in a feral and get their affections SO MUCH CREDIT!!   Please share your secrets!  I actually adopted my Frodo, but he "tricked" me in the shelter because I think he just desperately wanted out of there.  He seemed to want to cuddle and show affection so badly.  Come to get him home now he really doesn't want to be touched.  Now I take that back... he will touch YOU under HIS terms, but heaven forbid you pick him up or try to pet him... it's "RUN AWAY".  It's not that he's scared, but he just won't let you.  And so scared of other people still.  He was about 5 mos old when I rescued him, but I didn't think he'd be that set in his ways at that age??  He does love me, you can tell, he is always watching over me and is soooo happy to see me after I've been at work or whatever.  I just don't know how to get him past this point of "I don't wanna"... Hoping you had some tips for the affection part, since you seem to have a cuddlebug on your hands now, and from a feral cat - that is a HUGE accomplishment.  I can't say so much for myself! LOL!


----------



## Muushka

bulah1 said:


> I give anyone who can take in a feral and get their affections SO MUCH CREDIT!!   Please share your secrets!  I actually adopted my Frodo, but he "tricked" me in the shelter because I think he just desperately wanted out of there.  He seemed to want to cuddle and show affection so badly.  Come to get him home now he really doesn't want to be touched.  Now I take that back... he will touch YOU under HIS terms, but heaven forbid you pick him up or try to pet him... it's "RUN AWAY".  It's not that he's scared, but he just won't let you.  And so scared of other people still.  He was about 5 mos old when I rescued him, but I didn't think he'd be that set in his ways at that age??  He does love me, you can tell, he is always watching over me and is soooo happy to see me after I've been at work or whatever.  I just don't know how to get him past this point of "I don't wanna"... Hoping you had some tips for the affection part, since you seem to have a cuddlebug on your hands now, and from a feral cat - that is a HUGE accomplishment.  I can't say so much for myself! LOL!



Wow!  Thanks!  I thought it was huge, but not many people realize how difficult this can be.

I had volunteered at a cat shelter where occasionally we got the 'research kitties'.  These are cats that have lived their entire lives in a cage, only picked up when something 'medical' was done to them.  So they came totally freaked and afraid of humans (for the most part).  It was there I learned how to hold a very fearful cat (self taught, by the way  ).

First I would pick the cat up and immediately sit down.  Then I would cross my leg (as a man would) and the cat would feel more secure than restrained.  Always talking softly, rubbing the area between the eye and ear (that place where they rub up on their face).  And when the cat settled down, stopped squirming, after about a minute, I would release my grip.  Usually they jump down at that point.  But they appreciate that they are the one making the decision to get down, and it is not by fighting with me.

Then the next time I hold for a little longer.  If the cat does not purr after several times of this, chances are that they are not going to be able to be picked up.

My late kitty Brenda (not a feral) was with me for 14 years and she simply did not like to be picked up or sit on me or anything that involved being held.  I did not get her as a kitten, as she was a stray. But she was so loving in so many other ways that I finally accepted that she was just not a cat that I could hold. 

With Lucy (the feral) it took about a 2 months of picking her up and letting her get down on her own before she was comfortable being held.  But before that it took about a month before she would even let me touch her head!  Then it was about 4 months before she would come into the house and getting her to come into a different room took about a year.

Now, and especially during the winter months, she comes through the pet door, and meows quite loudly to announce that she is here.  And if I don't come out to see her, she actually comes into the bedroom and jumps on the bed and comes up to me for love.   I can't tell you how much that means to me.  My other cat Loretta only does that when she is hungry!

As for Frodo, it seems that cats do that, don't they!  So affectionate in the cage, but not so out of the cage.  You can try what I did and hopefully you have a Lucy and not a Brenda!  As for strangers, it took a long time for Lucy to not be afraid of my husband.  Sometimes he just has to come up to her, softly say her name and scratch in that special area on the face.  That calms her down.  As far as other strangers, if they are just there for the day, I don't bother trying to get her used to them.  But for several days, I will try by just holding her and allowing them to pet her.

Good luck!  And thank you!

PS I think the fact that he did show affection while in the cage means that he does like it!  That is a start  .


----------



## eeyore74

Can I throw in another furbaby pic?  I saw there was another Duncan dog on here, so mine wanted to say hi.

Duncan putting up with his eeyore crazed mama:





And to anyone who thinks he is not my kid - I have to diaper him.  He leaks.  I say it is the universe's way of making sure I have to diaper _something._


----------



## maddhatir

Hey another Duncan!!! Hi Pup!!!


OK- I finally found a pic of my pride and joy-- my kitty cat
are you ready b/c this is not one of the best pics I have of her??




























  Bhhhhaaaa 

OMG! That pic always distrubed me- I just had to share it. I forget who even sent it to me 

But, no, for real, I scanned some pics of my kitties and I am putting them in my photobucket and will be back with real pics!


----------



## Muushka

Cute cat!


----------



## maddhatir

THIS IS VERY LONG...SORRY!

hee hee, OK here are the real pics. Both kitties are with mom now b/c of our allergies. But we lived with them for a few years before she moved out. There were times when my asthma was so bad that DH would have to take me for a drive in the car in the middle of the night so I can get out of the house to breath- But there was NO WAY I was getting rid of the kitties! (Get this! My allergist told me to tie a cinder block around their necks and drop them in the river )

This is Patches (yes, real original name!) aka Squirel- it has been so long that I have been calling her Squierl I forget how it started! She is a little princess, so quiet and sweet as can be. But if she does not want to be held, she will just look at you, stick her nose up and walk away! 






You can see her tail, well lack thereof.  Both cats are Japanese Bobtails, VERY vocal. They are born without tails, no chopping off! 





This is Patches' brother, Katzenjammer, Jammer for short. I wanted a crazy name for the second one, after the obvious choice of Patches! I wanted to name this one Spot, but no one thought that was funny but me. Who names a cat Spot?.......exactly! But no, they still did not like it.....so, I searched and came up with Katzenjammer. Our last name is German so it fits nicely on his papers. Not only that- the word means, A loud, discordant noise or wailing in english. Well! How the name fits him!

He needs to be up your butt 24/7- he is the nosiest cat ev-ver! If you have something in your hand- He will grab your hand, with his paw, pull your hand towards him just so he can see what you have! 






Now, the rest of the pics are a few kitties that "found me" 

This is.....Kitty. Not sure if Kitty was a boy or a girl. DH and I lived in St. John USVI for 5 months and this kitty found us. Kitty would be at our door all the time. When he/she would hear the jeep pull up in the driveway- Kitty would come running down the hill and would be waiting for us at the door. If someone came for a visit- this cat would NOT move away from the front of the door he/she would just lay across the doorway so the person had to step over him/her. 






This cat also found me. One day he just showed up at my condo door- and I was on the second floor  why not pick someone on the ground floor- oh well, all DH and I could come up with was, maybe someone moved out of their condo and left him behind I would throw old towels in the dryer for him to lay on at night so he would be nice and warm b/c he found us in November. I put a copy of this pic in EVERY vet office and supermarket in the area- no one claimed him. Once day a woman down the street said her daughter MIGHT want him- so I took him to get cleaned up and his nails cut, and don't you know, the groomer fell in love with him and kept him  BUT- sad to say- a few months later he passed away. He must have been sick 






The next kitty's name is Jack! He found me too- one day- he was just THERE. I named him Jack. He was so friendly but I never saw him in the neighborhood before. So, of course, I feed him. and of course, he sticks around. It was this past winter he found me. So- again, I worried he was cold. We have a stairwell outside that leads to our basement. I would open the door so at least he can be out of the elements and be warmer than if he was outside. I got the brainy idea of putting the spaceheater out there for him. I would let it run for a while before I knew he would come down for the night so it was warm for him  

Fast forward- actually a DISer ended up taking him. I know her from the Johnny Depp Eye Candy thread- she lives in N Jersey I live in South. So we met in the middle and exchanged Jack! He is happy, warm and loved now! Thank you rhiannonwales (Sherrie) for giving Jack a loving home! 






and......these are just the deer I would feed every day in my backyard during the winter when I lived in our condo! I took this from our balcony. There was a baby that would run up to me when I would come out with food, so I would scare him away so he did not get used to approaching people!


----------



## Hixski

eeyore74 said:


> Can I throw in another furbaby pic?  I saw there was another Duncan dog on here, so mine wanted to say hi.
> 
> Duncan putting up with his eeyore crazed mama:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> And to anyone who thinks he is not my kid - I have to diaper him.  He leaks.  I say it is the universe's way of making sure I have to diaper _something._



The world can never have too many Duncans!!!!! Cute dog!! 



maddhatir said:


> Hey another Duncan!!! Hi Pup!!!
> 
> 
> OK- I finally found a pic of my pride and joy-- my kitty cat
> are you ready b/c this is not one of the best pics I have of her??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Bhhhhaaaa
> 
> OMG! That pic always distrubed me- I just had to share it. I forget who even sent it to me
> 
> But, no, for real, I scanned some pics of my kitties and I am putting them in my photobucket and will be back with real pics!



Ok, that picture is just freaky!!! Love the pictures of the other kitties!! The real ones.


----------



## bulah1

maddhatir said:


> and......these are just the deer I would feed every day in my backyard during the winter when I lived in our condo! I took this from our balcony. There was a baby that would run up to me when I would come out with food, so I would scare him away so he did not get used to approaching people!



Your kitties were all very sweet!! And how cool about the deer!  You are very smart to scare the deer away, so he wouldn't learn to get to attached to people... see you're smart, I probably would have done the total opposite and tried to pull a Snow White or something and have all the little forest creatures as close to me as possible... but that really defeats the purpose of them surviving in the wild doesn't it! LOL.  You are clever at least, I'm a big dummy! LMAO!

I have had other little forest creatures come up on my "level" when I was living on the upper part of a duplex. Our place was set up similarly to yours where there was a "wooded" area behind us.  So we'd get deer, ducks, and all sorts of stuff wandering in when they felt it was appropriate.

I even had a hawk fly on to my porch, now that was about the coolest thing ever... couldn't get my camera in time...  

But my favorite must have been "OPIE" - my opossum.  The first time I met him he was just a little baby possum.  Tiny little guy.  And he was hiding under my bird bath stand all "frozen" with his little mouth open in defense.  A much larger possum was threatening him right there on our back porch over some spilled safflower bird seed.  All I had to do was knock on the glass door, the big fellow took one look and ran away down the stairs.  Little Opie just sat there in his defense mode for about 3 minutes or maybe more until he felt safe.  Then he "unfroze" and immediately began munching on the seed.  You could actually here these little "crunches" from the other side of the door.  I thought it was the sweetest thing ever.  I do have pics of my Opie somewhere.  I began to leave stuff out for him on the deck floor so he could get at it. LOL.  Little "leftovers" or bird seeds, whatever I felt like giving him.  He would always visit.  I made him fat and happy.  I never got to say good bye to him - we ended up moving down the street.  I wonder how long he visited the new residents! LOL I probably ruined him too... I was not smart and made him dependent on my foods... I hope I didn't destroy my little buddy by doing that.  Again, you did the right thing! LOL - I just always try to make buddies with whatever critters come my way.


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


>





Jammer looks CRAZY!!!  All wide eyes and with that "what's going on, what are we doing next" look.  I know that look well, Khabo has it too!

And you named one of your kitties Jack?  Foreshadowing???     Was he a rogue, lovable pirate as well?


And I LOVE that picture of Duncan.  "Mom, is this really necessary?  Deep sigh, ok I'll where the stupid hat if you insist...."      Animal expressions are sooo funny.  And they really do put up with a lot from us insane human people.


----------



## maddhatir

bulah1 said:


> But my favorite must have been "OPIE" - my opossum.  The first time I met him he was just a little baby possum.  Tiny little guy.  And he was hiding under my bird bath stand all "frozen" with his little mouth open in defense.  A much larger possum was threatening him right there on our back porch over some spilled safflower bird seed.  All I had to do was knock on the glass door, the big fellow took one look and ran away down the stairs.  Little Opie just sat there in his defense mode for about 3 minutes or maybe more until he felt safe.  Then he "unfroze" and immediately began munching on the seed.  You could actually here these little "crunches" from the other side of the door.  I thought it was the sweetest thing ever.  I do have pics of my Opie somewhere.  I began to leave stuff out for him on the deck floor so he could get at it. LOL.  Little "leftovers" or bird seeds, whatever I felt like giving him.  He would always visit.  I made him fat and happy.  I never got to say good bye to him - we ended up moving down the street.  I wonder how long he visited the new residents! LOL I probably ruined him too... I was not smart and made him dependent on my foods... I hope I didn't destroy my little buddy by doing that.  Again, you did the right thing! LOL - I just always try to make buddies with whatever critters come my way.



oh- You sound like my mom! She lived in a ground floor apt. She fed all the little creatures. She was there for about 10 years until she moved. They would all come out of the woods to eat on her porch! opossums, raccoons, chipmunks, of course squirrels- Not sure how they are all making out since she left!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Jammer looks CRAZY!!!  All wide eyes and with that "what's going on, what are we doing next" look.  I know that look well, Khabo has it too!
> 
> And you named one of your kitties Jack?  Foreshadowing???     Was he a rogue, lovable pirate as well?



Jammer IS insane- I am contemplating putting him in the kitty mental institution- it will be for his own good 


As far as Jack- He just looked all roughed up, missing some teeth poor thing- he looked like a pirate kitty!

Sherrie, who has him now, took him to the vet. The vet told her he looked like a cat who someone may have abused or has been through some rough times. Some of his teeth were broken off at the gum line- but they had healed- he had some bumps and bruises.  

But he was the most friendly cat! But what scared me was, anytime I would go to walk away from him- he would grab my leg with his claws, really give me a few swats and dig in like he was mad I was stepping away from him!- I wasn't sure if was going to go psycho kitty on my butt But I would tell him no and put my hand in front of his face and he would stop- I was also thinking about where his claws had been- I do not want them puncturing my skin!!


----------



## KRIS10420

I enjoy seeing pictures of everyone's pets and they are all very cute. 
Off the side of my house is an enclosure that the cat's have access to via a pet door in a window. I came home from work one day last week to find this outside http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m317/kris10420/deer.jpg
Bodie was outside talking to him and he was just laying there watching the cat.


----------



## Hixski

Aren't we all terrible the things we do to our pets????? I am sure I have posted these before but.......


----------



## arbeywolf

I'm sort of a lurker here but after seeing everyone's great pics of their critters, I just couldn't hold back on posting some of mine 

Here's our 2 dogs after killing a giant shark toy 
They are so proud of themselves  





our kitty, Ferris





And our Senegal parrot, Chicken 





All these guys are rescues. Both dogs were shelter dogs,and Chicken was also a shelter bird.
Ferris' whole litter was dumped in a box at the door of the vet's that I used to work for sometime in the night/early morning. They were too young to have been separated from their mom but I guess that didn't matter to the person who tossed them out  
So anyway. all of us techs took turns fostering them until they were old enough to be adopted...then each of us and one of the vets adopted them all LOL

Anyway now that I've delurked I'll try and post more here. Nice to have a place with like minded people 

~Raeann


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Aren't we all terrible the things we do to our pets????? I am sure I have posted these before but.......



Hix! I just hope for Duncan's sake it is Halloween!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Hix! I just hope for Duncan's sake it is Halloween!



That is what he wore to a Halloween party at the kennel. They said he was too sweet for that hat. That was from a couple of years ago.


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## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> That is what he wore to a Halloween party at the kennel. They said he was too sweet for that hat. That was from a couple of years ago.



OK then, that's acceptable!- I was just hoping you didn't make him wear that in front of his friends for no good reason!


----------



## tonilea

Well, as a defensive mechanism, because I didn't want to answer questions about my infertility, I simply said "If I *have* a baby, I can't *be* the baby".


----------



## Liisa

Ok... TOTALLY off-topic.  But I'm too excited and had to share.  Just over a month ago, I started a program called "the Couch Potato to 5K runner" - just to get in shape for my Mexico trip.  I totally have the couch potato part down!     Anyway, Dh (the super fitness geek) decided yesterday to sign up for the Disney Marathon in January.  Now, I've never been overly supportive about his races before... but, hey, I get a Disney Trip out of this one!!!!    As DH and I are online today looking at the race map (totally cool, by the way, they get to run through all the parks before they open!!!)... I noticed that on the Friday before the marathon, Disney has a 5k run (before park opening all around Animal Kingdom).  The light bulb goes off and I think - I could do that.  It's what I'm training for and I didn't even know it!!!  Call DVC, add another night to our reservation, change the airflight, confirm with the housesitter... and I'm ready for my 5k at DISNEY!!!!  (well... first I need to get to the point where I can actually run for that far... details, details!!!   )

I'm so psyched!!!


----------



## KirklandTutu

Just to share...

Tonight I reconnected with an old friend and *gasp* surprise surprise she doesn't want to have kids either!  I nearly jumped out of my seat with joy.   At last, someone that I can go out with who isn't trying or already has.  

And!  she had a circa 1993 Mexican (something event to do with Folklorico) Disneyland event on her purse.  

Good times, good times.


----------



## ChisJo

Liisa said:


> Ok... TOTALLY off-topic.  But I'm too excited and had to share.  Just over a month ago, I started a program called "the Couch Potato to 5K runner" - just to get in shape for my Mexico trip.  I totally have the couch potato part down!     Anyway, Dh (the super fitness geek) decided yesterday to sign up for the Disney Marathon in January.  Now, I've never been overly supportive about his races before... but, hey, I get a Disney Trip out of this one!!!!    As DH and I are online today looking at the race map (totally cool, by the way, they get to run through all the parks before they open!!!)... I noticed that on the Friday before the marathon, Disney has a 5k run (before park opening all around Animal Kingdom).  The light bulb goes off and I think - I could do that.  It's what I'm training for and I didn't even know it!!!  Call DVC, add another night to our reservation, change the airflight, confirm with the housesitter... and I'm ready for my 5k at DISNEY!!!!  (well... first I need to get to the point where I can actually run for that far... details, details!!!   )
> 
> I'm so psyched!!!



Once you get to 5km, you will continue going....I wanted to learn to run just 5 km....now I'm registered for a 10km race in September. I would love to run the Disney Marathon (and yes, the map is really cool....I don't know if I would be able to do the full marathon though!!). My goal is to be in this run in 2009! If you read the race too, the characters are placed throughout the race to be your "cheerleaders" of sort, to give you a pick me up! Along with racing through all the parks before opening, that would be pretty cool!


----------



## Liisa

ChisJo said:


> If you read the race too, the characters are placed throughout the race to be your "cheerleaders" of sort, to give you a pick me up! Along with racing through all the parks before opening, that would be pretty cool!



I had read that... the character appearances should make my first race easier.  I'll have pictures from the 5k race - since this is a walk in the park for DH (as I'll be going pretty slow and he'll stay with me), he said he'd bring a camera and snap pictures while we are going along!  Those will be some unique pictures to add to my album.


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## kennancat

A couple of stories I thought you all would enjoy:

I ended up at Downtown Disney last weekend for dinner. Stupid me, I decide to go for one of the close parking spaces  I get there and every spot is full - save one. And that one spot is occupied by a mom who is busy setting up a stroller and getting it perfect  You know - I understand why someone wouldn't want to do that behind the car and be hanging out into traffic, but this woman didn't even give the appearance of realizing that she was inconveniencing anyone or of caring if she did realize. My favorite part was at the end when she took an extra 10 seconds to put her purse on top and fiddle with one more handle to lock everything in place. Lovely.

The second happened to a co-worker of mine. She was waiting outside of a conference room for a previous meeting to break up. She ended up chatting with another person waiting outside the room. The other person asks her how the traffic was with dropping her kids off at school (school just started back this week in our county). Well, my co-worker is maybe 26, single, and has no children. And now is completely freaked out about how old she looks that people automatically assume she has kids


----------



## LuvsEpcot

I've been lurking on the thread for a while and find it to be a breath of fresh air to have this topic debated.  My DH and I will be celebrating our 30th wedding anniversary in December and I will be 50 tomorrow. I have two daughters now 20 & 25. I didn't think my first decision through very well when I got pregnant the first time. We had friends who got pregnant quite unexpectedly. I was 24 then and wanted the mommy-to-be attention that she was getting (terribly insecure back then), so I "told" my DH that I was going off the pill and wanted to start a family... wrong thing to do. I forgot to ask him if he was ready to be a Dad, he wasn't and it drove a wedge between us for many years. He loves his daughters, but they're not as close as I'd hoped since I was such a Daddy's girl.  The problem was that he and I had always talked of traveling and only having "fur babies" Neither of us really wanted children and he felt a great sense of betrayal when I got pregnant. It took us years to open up and talk about the years that we lost together.  We were and are great together, best friends, lovers, confidants.  If in my parallel life there were no children I know that we would be very happy, like we are now that we are empty-nesters. Hypothetically speaking... If you don't know someone then you don't miss them. I guess that's how I view thinking of what my life would have been like without children. They would not be in existence, therefore I wouldn't know what I would be missing and it wouldn't matter. But in this life I DO know them and they are very much in our lives on a daily basis. They are also declaring that they do not want children and if that is truly what they choose, then it is a decision that I will gladly stand by them. I love my "fur grandbabies"   Over the years the girls and I have discussed the many reasons why people have children and have seen plenty that should have used birth control. I work in a childcare program, I see all types of parents and parenting styles. We are with these children for 10 hours a day...who is really raising them? 

It is very easy for one to get pregnant (under normal conditions), but it takes courage and honesty with oneself and one's partner to make an educated, well thought out decision to not have children and I applaud you for it.


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## Muushka

Wow.  I can only say 2 things:

1.  Thank you for your honesty and sharing with us your experience and

2.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!


----------



## dburg30

Krissalee said:


> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!




We have been very lucky in we dont have the type of family that pressures us on that issue.  They know we are happy living our lives how we do.  I am very thankful for that.  BOTH sides of the family understand.  We celebrated 16 years this past June.


----------



## bulah1

LuvsEpcot said:


> It is very easy for one to get pregnant (under normal conditions), but it takes courage and honesty with oneself and one's partner to make an educated, well thought out decision to not have children and I applaud you for it.



Yours is an incredible story of honesty! Thank you so much for sharing it with us.  I am sure you are not alone in the choices you've made - I am willing to bet there are many, many who have chosen the same way for the same reasons or similarly.  But there are very few who actually probably admit it to themselves like you have done! You are incredible!!  And I'm sure the love you have for your children is not diminished at all, but it's the personal marriage relationship that has to pay the price.  Luckily yours was strong enough to hold out where many others' would have lost their drive to keep things afloat.  And probably the entire family as a whole could have experienced a greater "togetherness" if things had been different in the original pregnancy's circumstances.  I totally commend you for keeping everyone together through this time.  Heck, some marrieds with no children have a hard enough time keeping their marriages together as it is! LOL.  Kudos to you and thanks so much for sharing!!  You are absolutely right that many people can go into having children for the WRONG reasons.  I hope more of the parents that seems to condemn us "childless" can see things from your vantage.


----------



## momomonster

LuvsEpcot said:


> It is very easy for one to get pregnant (under normal conditions), but it takes courage and honesty with oneself and one's partner to make an educated, well thought out decision to not have children and I applaud you for it.



  

~Happy Birthday~

Oh, how I wish my MIL thought like you. She pities us for our childfree decision and thinks happiness only comes from having children. The worst part is the topic is so taboo we can't speak openly to convince her otherwise. 

There should be more thoughtful people like you on this planet. The world would be a better place.


----------



## swim-mom

I saw this thread and I had to post!!! Just by my name you can tell I have children, the number is not important either. 

I have to say that those of who have decided NOT to have children are brave people who deserve the respect for being responsible. Unfortunetly, many people have children because that is what is expected and the children are the ones who suffer. 

I know this first hand, because my mother never should have had me. BUT she did because it was expected. If she had the courage and enough respect for herself, she could have stood up for herself. 

Therefore, in life we need to respect each other's differances and realize that we are all not meant to be mothers and/or fathers!!! 

Thank you for not doing what society expects, and being strong enough to realize what "YOU" need in life.


----------



## Hixski

One thing I have learned from being childfree is that we make great aunts and uncles. We have time for nieces and nephews whereas some with families might not have as much time. We have friends in California and their 2 girls just love us to pieces. They are now 10 and 7. They used to ask us if we were going to have a baby for them to play with. We told them no and was that ok for them. The older one is very sharp. She told us it was ok if we didn't have kids because they loved us just the way we were.

Now if a child can understand that concept why can't some of the adults??

LuvsEpcot: Thanks for sharing your story. I have had a couple of people tell me almost the same story you have. It seems much easier to tell someone who is childfree I think. You won't get the same judgements from us as you might from someone who has children. I have always said that DH and I were fence sitters. Nothing ever happened through the years and we just decided that was ok. It did not take long to realize what side of the fence we really were on.


----------



## maddhatir

*LuvsEpcot-* Happy 50!!!!  

and I think I could have been you if DH and I had kids. We always felt like kids would just put a wedge between us, we enjoyed each other so much (and still do!) that we could not bear the thought that any of our attention would have to be saved for the kids.  

I have nieces and nephews and yes!- I love them. Just the other day my BIL was "hinting" around for me to watch one of them......I just said, "sorry" I have things to do. 

Sure, it was just my weekly yard saling ritual and I had a afternoon party- but I had plans! He always makes me and DH feel guilty b/c we will not take them- sorry- YOU had the kids- WE were smart enough NOT to! I love the kids with all of my heart- but that does not mean I want to watch them 

*and swim-mom*, thanks for understanding- as you can see (above) just WHY I never wanted kids. Why would I have them and not devote all my time to them? It's not fair to the child.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Now if a child can understand that concept why can't some of the adults??




  That is what is wrong with this world today!!!

I was reading another thread about 2 weeks ago- it was about rude people. Some woman wrote that her 14 year old daughter asked her if people were this rude when she was growing up! 

Some adults should be ashamed of themselves! 

I think that even goes for the people that are always commenting on the no-kids subject- don't they realize it is rude to make comments like that? 

I would love to hear from people that would admit--  they read our thread and are going to stop being so closed minded and understand that not every thinks like them about kids.

~~~~​
I know this it totally OT- but it is about a rude woman me and mom encountered at 7-11 last Saturday morning while getting coffee (before yardsaling....with NO kids ) 

We are at the coffee station and mom is getting her cup- I look over and this woman, maybe early 30's with a puss on her face and a daughter in tow pushed her way in front of mom to get a cup ewwww! So mom has her cup and comes next to me and pours her coffee, I am watching the witch looking all impatient- mind you, she can easily walk to the other side of the coffee station and the same kind of coffee is over there. So I am watching, mom moves and is standing next to me, takes out the half and half and goes to get a lid, this WITCH reaches IN FRONT of mom takes the half and half- no excuse me, and says " I need this" WELL!!!!!!!  Mom won't say anything. So me!? I say "IT WOULD BE NICE TO SAY EXCUSE ME!!!!!" She would NOT look at me at all. I KNOW she heard me!  When I commented to mom how rude she was- mom said, actually when we were coming into the store- the woman almost ran her over to get past her!

You know, I used get aggravated (ok- still do) b/c people have ZERO common sense- I told everyone I was going to make a cape and be a "common sense superhero" and point out to people when they are being idiots (THAT would sure be a full-time job) I have no idea how people function in the country  

But I think now I may change that, and address all of the rudeness around us everyday! Sorry! I do not think I would be able to do both, I would be up 24/7 I would have to get recruits.


----------



## maddhatir

OK- since I touched on the subject of common sense- or lack thereof , I had to post a story about a ding dong that I spoke to on the phone yesterday. 

I didn't want to hog up this thread being OT- ....um, just  like I am now ...sorry!...eeek- here is the linky


----------



## bulah1

swim-mom said:


> Unfortunetly, many people have children because that is what is expected and the children are the ones who suffer.
> 
> Therefore, in life we need to respect each other's differances and realize that we are all not meant to be mothers and/or fathers!!!
> 
> Thank you for not doing what society expects, and being strong enough to realize what "YOU" need in life.



Thank you so much for seeing it this way, you are so right - that is absolutely how I feel about it, and I'm sure many others on here! I do hope things were ok between you and your mother despite her need to have you.  You are right that so many relationships suffer and it is so unfair to the children. Thank you for your sincere post!!  



Hixski said:


> One thing I have learned from being childfree is that we make great aunts and uncles. We have time for nieces and nephews whereas some with families might not have as much time. We have friends in California and their 2 girls just love us to pieces. They are now 10 and 7. They used to ask us if we were going to have a baby for them to play with. We told them no and was that ok for them. The older one is very sharp. She told us it was ok if we didn't have kids because they loved us just the way we were.
> 
> Now if a child can understand that concept why can't some of the adults??



Again, right on the nose here! LOL! I love my little neice to death (on my FH's side) - and can't wait 'til my own sister has children.  In fact my little neice now is so sweet and is always so excited to see me and loves the time I spend with her... you know - I probably wouldn't get that good of a feeling from kids of my own... especially in the teenage phase when they start loathing parents for no reason! LOL.  This way they always have an adult they can talk to that can listen to them and hopefully give advice when needed that they will take.  For now I enjoy the toddler stage, where it's all love and cuddles all the time... while poor mom and dad have to deal with little miss crankypants when she's upset! LOL.  

And it is funny how much the little ones know too, isn't it?  Apparently adult minds get clouded by the fog of inhumanity that just doens't affect kids while they're little... wish we could all revisit that time in our lives - where pretty much everyone gets along and plays in the sandbox together.


----------



## maddhatir

bulah1 said:


> And it is funny how much the little ones know too, isn't it?  Apparently adult minds get clouded by the fog of inhumanity that just doens't affect kids while they're little... wish we could all revisit that time in our lives - where pretty much everyone gets along and plays in the sandbox together.



I am not too sure about that- kids are rude too! 

I have been several places with my niece where she is playing (and she has had her BAD moments, will not defend her there!  !) but for the most part she is very friendly kid.

She will walk up to a child and start talking or ask if they want to play etc. And you would think she had 3 heads the way some of them look at her!!! Very snobby like! Like, how DARE you bother me!? I can only imagine what the parents are like!

Probably like the woman in 7-11 on Saturday!


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> Probably like the woman in 7-11 on Saturday!




I think your mom should have "tripped" and dumped the coffee on that witch!   I know, I know... two wrongs and all....  But UGH!  Some people!


----------



## bulah1

Liisa said:


> I think your mom should have "tripped" and dumped the coffee on that witch!   I know, I know... two wrongs and all....  But UGH!  Some people!



Then she'd probably sue and win... so that's no good either... LOL

----- on another totally off-topic story I wanted to share yesterday, but didn't have time....

I'm going to the gym daily now in attempts to get in shape enough to wear a bathing suit for my upcoming DISNEY vacation in October!! Woo hoo!

Well, not woo-hoo really, but I do drag myself there in attempts to remove cellulite from my thighs... begrudgingly.  And if it's not bad enough I'm there in and of itself, yesterday apparently all of the children in the world took over the work-out and pool area of our local Holiday Inn (which is where I'm working out).  And for every 20 children it seemed there was only 1 adult.  Mind you there are signs everywhere that there are no children allowed on work out equipment, yet they come sit next to me on the bike while I am trying to keep my heart rate in check and start asking me questions about how to work the equipment... fiddling around with it and such.  (And also as a side note there are no children above the age of 9 it seemed.)  Dude behind the counter is probably 32 and is apparently busy getting attention from some teenage girls chatting away and ignoring there are 8 year olds dangling from nearby weight equipment.  THEN... as I moved over to the elliptical trainer... the ball tossing began.  And not just any ball - they took one of those friggin' huge workout balls and started bopping it around.  About 4 of them tossing this thing around right in the middle of the room!!!  Dude behind the couter is still copletely ignoring this...  I only got in about 35 minutes of cardio... I usually do about 45, but I was getting way perturbed and couldn't stand it anymore, especially since dip wad instructor wouldn't do a darned thing! I shot him a dirty look and only THEN does he tell the kids to stop tossing the ball.  So I go to this little alcove area (very tight quarters) where some weight equipment is, the ball finally rests in it's rightful place, and some free weights.  I use the ball to do some crunchers and also do some tricep exercises.... and here come wizzing by on their STUPID roller shoes... (I can't STAND those things) about 3 children.  Same kids, the fourth was MIA somewhere.  They twirl about and I've had it, so I go to get changed in the locker room.  By the time I come out, dude behind the counter is still flirting with girls half his age and the children (no not his "girls" LOL) are now playing a game of "CHASE" through the workout facility.  As I sign out two of them bump into me and I yell at the guy - "ARE YOU GOING TO DOOOO ANYTHING ABOUT THIS????" and he actually told the children to quit it.  Well one of them was out of the loop on this and as I was heading towards the stairs to leave the facility, one comes ramming into - I flipped... I yelled "YOU WILL NOT RUN IN HERE, DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME? I've HAD IT WITH YOU"... I must have looked like some serial killer because the look on the kids face, I swear he almost peed his pants!     Sorry but it made me laugh.  Where are the parents of these kids, or at very least, the ones who should be watching them??? That place is extremely dangerous for kids to be in running around and using equipment like that.  No adults in sight.  The rest of the 400 kids all seemed to be in the pool area, and literally 3 or 4 adults in THAT area only.  Don't even know if they realized these kids were missing or not.  And if they knew, that makes me even more peeved... that they let them go through the weight room like that... not only could they have hurt themselves, they could have had a hefty lawsuit on their hands when one of the kids knocked me over and injured me... Those signs are posted for a reason... 

Anyways, that's my venting story.


----------



## bulah1

maddhatir said:


> I am not too sure about that- kids are rude too!
> 
> I have been several places with my niece where she is playing (and she has had her BAD moments, will not defend her there!  !) but for the most part she is very friendly kid.




Yeah, I guess it depends on how the kid is raised and how little they are still.

My neice is still only a toddler, so she's still in the lovey stage.  And somehow despite how (oops I almost wrote a bad word! LOL) "bad" her parents are with her, she still manages to be a little luv bug.  Her big brother on the other hand (now about 7) - has the mental capacity of a 5 year old, and I have no idea why.  He's a little jerk most of the time, and not that I want to play favorites, but I just don't want to spend any time with him cuz he's an unruley little bugger.  Won't listen to a word.

I'm sure you had some idea about what I was originally trying to get at though, hopefully.  Just trying to say that it's the environment around kids that tends to affect how they treat others.  You see the effects come to fruition as they grow older.


----------



## Liisa

Bulah1...

Your story makes me soooo glad we have weight equipment and a treadmill all set up in our basement.  The few times I have belonged to a gym, I hated having to wait to get on the equipment I want to use.  So now, when I'm working on my run program, I hop on the treadmill, plop a DVD into the player with the TV strategically place directly in front of my treadmill... and I'm a happy camper.  Well, as happy as I can be while sweating and struggling to get through my program.  But... not dodging children or large bouncing balls.  Turns out, I've got it easy!


----------



## maddhatir

bulah1-

you should call and speak to a manager- Not only are the kids annoying, but imagine of one of them got hurt on the equipment- you know their parents would be crawling out of the woodwork to sue the place!

You should put it that way to the manager- make them look at it like, not that you are annoyed, but certainly mention you are, but tell them THEY are the ones who will be liable when someone is hurt!- that kind of scares them sometimes- uttering the word "sue"! 

If the manager does not listen- go higher up!


----------



## raspberrysharpei

Hello all (I'm prepared for the flames )
I am hoping some of you can point me in the right direction.  (Quick explanation)...I am enrolled in English course, addressing issues of Argument. The requirement is to create a series of argument essays and the instructor suggests to choose one issue that can be used for the semester.

I have located a few books such as "The Baby Boon", and "Child-free & Loving It". (Found them-have not received them).

Does anyone have an opinion that our government may be promoting or encouraging people to have children based on tax deductions, tax credits, etc.

Does anyone have a suggested reading or resource list??

Thanks,
DEE


----------



## kennancat

Hmm - if you're looking for good resources to contrast with those books, I'd try the Albert Mohler letter: http://www.albertmohler.com/commentary_read.php?cdate=2005-06-07
(BTW, just as an aside, DH is Southern Baptist and this letter really chaps his hide. Not all Christians think this way  )

I wouldn't necessarily say our government "encourages" child bearing with tax deductions or credits -  I think the cost of raising children is nowhere near offset by those decreases. If you can include other countries, I'd suggest looking into the policies that some European countries are experimenting with. I've heard that the Netherlands has a few good examples. I think Japan is another place where the birth rate is seriously falling off and they're starting to panic.


----------



## Hixski

We have a wonderful facility right by our house that has anything you could want in a gym or recreation. I have provided a link so you can see how nice it us. http://www.stpetersmo.net/default.asp?sectionID=24&pageID=10062
We used to belong. USED TO!! We joined in the winter and went in the daytime. Kids were not allowed in the weight or treadmills room. Did that stop them. Noooo, not at all. This place had "field trips" all the time. Of course most of the kids were always where they were not supposed to be. 

We finally quit in the summer when all the kids were out of school. They asked why we were leaving. We told them that kids pretty much are in the weight room, the running and treadmill room and everywhere that was for adults only. And nobody was doing anything about it. They kind of gave the lame excuse that so much is geared towards children. We said yes, but they are always where they are not allowed. They said they "try" to keep them out but it is a neverending battle. We said "Good luck, you are losing the battle" 

We have a treadmill and some exercise equipment now at home. We don't have to leave and we have a TV smack in front of the equipment. I have a gym where I work too.


----------



## Liisa

Hixski said:


> We have a treadmill and some exercise equipment now at home. We don't have to leave and we have a TV smack in front of the equipment. I have a gym where I work too.



TV in front of the workout equipment does wonders for my motivation!!!     I love watching action movies while I'm working out - there is never really a good spot to stop so I end up doing extended workouts.  I am soooo easily entertained!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> We finally quit in the summer when all the kids were out of school. They asked why we were leaving. We told them that kids pretty much are in the weight room, the running and treadmill room and everywhere that was for adults only. And nobody was doing anything about it. They kind of gave the lame excuse that so much is geared towards children. We said yes, but they are always where they are not allowed. They said they "try" to keep them out but it is a neverending battle. We said "Good luck, you are losing the battle"



OH SURE! The last time I checked weights and treadmills were geared towards.....CHILDREN???! 

I would have said one or all of the following- it would depend on my mood that day   "What the %& are YOU talking about?!" "Do you even THINK before you speak?" "Tell me what THAT means!" "Do I look like an idiot?"

Can you tell, I have no tolerance for LAME excuses!


----------



## maddhatir

raspberrysharpei said:


> Hello all (I'm prepared for the flames )
> I am hoping some of you can point me in the right direction.  (Quick explanation)...I am enrolled in English course, addressing issues of Argument. The requirement is to create a series of argument essays and the instructor suggests to choose one issue that can be used for the semester.
> 
> I have located a few books such as "The Baby Boon", and "Child-free & Loving It". (Found them-have not received them).
> 
> Does anyone have an opinion that our government may be promoting or encouraging people to have children based on tax deductions, tax credits, etc.
> 
> Does anyone have a suggested reading or resource list??
> 
> Thanks,
> DEE



Hey! How about cheking into WHY 90% of MY taxes are paying for schools! 

I am not a breeder- I should be EXEMPT! I should get somekind of reward, not punishment.


ETA- ready for this- MY taxes for 2007 were= 5030.76 ! YES! I have a small 1200 sq foot rancher on less than 1/2 acre lot.

now- out of that 5030.76.........3268.88 went to district and regional schools! I AM SO FREAKING SICK OF THIS! I would rather they INCREASE the amount they put towards the Farmland/Open Space portion than the schools. But no, they only take 84.59 for that! ....and keep knocking down our trees!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Hey! How about cheking into WHY 90% of MY taxes are paying for schools!
> 
> I am not a breeder- I should be EXEMPT! I should get somekind of reward, not punishment.
> 
> 
> ETA- ready for this- MY taxes for 2007 were= 5030.76 ! YES! I have a small 1200 sq foot rancher on less than 1/2 acre lot.
> 
> now- out of that 5030.76.........3268.88 went to district and regional schools! I AM SO FREAKING SICK OF THIS! I would rather they INCREASE the amount they put towards the Farmland/Open Space portion than the schools. But no, they only take 84.59 for that! ....and keep knocking down our trees!




Yikes!!! Your taxes are scary!! Our taxes are somewhat high for the midwest because of highly rated schools and all the amenities our town has. That being said our taxes last year were $2231. That is on a 1400sq ft ranch. My parents pay even more than us because they live in St. Louis county. They have a 50yr old, 950sq ft ranch. Our house is in the county outside of St. Louis county.

We also get to pay another tax for schools called personal property tax. You pay that on cars, motorcycles, etc. Basically on any type of vehicle you own. That usually runs another $500 or so a year. 

I think people should pay taxes for schools prorated on how many children you have. If they want to still stick it to people that don't have children, fine, but we should pay less than someone that has kids. And someone that has one child should pay less than someone that has 5 children. But as we know nobody would ever vote that tax in. So we all continue to pay for everyones elses children whether we have them or not. I feel for older people that are retired having to still come up with taxes for schools when they haven't had a child in school in probably 30 years. Now that is sad.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Yikes!!! Your taxes are scary!! We also get to pay another tax for schools called personal property tax. You pay that on cars, motorcycles, etc. Basically on any type of vehicle you own. That usually runs another $500 or so a year.



Tell me ABOUT scary!!! They are coming around this fall to reassess the homes in our county- b/c they have not done it in a very long time-- and to add to that, we are putting on the addition! 

I am scared to death to see what our taxes our going to be for 2008! I would not be surprised if they would be up to almost 7000.00!

Now we do not have to pay any "personal" taxes. We just pay the tax when we purchase it- and that's it. 

In a different county- this was just all over the news- they DOUBLED the taxes for that county-- all at once! It was sad to hear the stories of the elderly who can barely pay their property taxes now- and now to double them! What is wrong with this state!? There you go again, the elderly have no reason to be paying school taxes!


----------



## kennancat

Paying taxes for schools has never been an issue for me. I think that's because I grew up in an area of Florida where we had a lot of retirees who would *^%$& and moan about the taxes and how everything was so much better up north (no, I don't why they moved to Florida either  ) I always felt like even though they lived here, they weren't concerned about the quality of life or personally invested in seeing the community thrive. All their grandkids went to school back home in the Northeast, so if Florida schools needed money, too bad; they didn't care. I think that's why I've always been supportive of my money being used to pay for education - it builds a quality community in the long run, and that's better for all of us.

And in the short term, better rated public schools make the value of my house go up


----------



## Muushka

I agree with you.  I feel that education is an investment for the future of (fill in the blank..neighborhood, town, state, country....).  But I do have a problem with the tax dollars not being spent properly, cries for more money, children knocking on my door asking me to buy something to support their school or people at work selling tickets to something or candy bars.  Oy.


----------



## maddhatir

Sorry IMO- not a 3268.00 $$ YEARLY investment 

There are schools in other states that are JUST as good as NJ schools and their residents do not pay HALF of what WE pay in NJ 

If those states can provide a great education for LESS! so can NJ! I am sure the NJ teachers would beg to differ, maybe they make a bigger salary up here? 

I still believe taxes should be on a "scale"

ETA- and just b/c I decide to put on an addition and my taxes go UP......does that mean little Johnny is NOW going to get a better education than BEFORE I put my addition on.......mmmm. Doubt it!


----------



## momomonster

I really don't mind paying for schools even though I don't have and will never have children. An educated populus is good for everyone. What bugs me is that I pay for the schools when the PARENTS get the extra deductions and credits. 

Seems unfair that we CF pay MORE for using LESS/FEWER services. Shouldn't it be the other way around?


----------



## maddhatir

momomonster said:


> I really don't mind paying for schools even though I don't have and will never have children. An educated populus is good for everyone. What bugs me is that I pay for the schools when the PARENTS get the extra deductions and credits.
> 
> Seems unfair that we CF pay MORE for using LESS/FEWER services. Shouldn't it be the other way around?



Sure- if I were paying a _fraction_ of what I pay every year in taxes- maybe I would be all for....education too !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


When I tell people from other states how much we pay- they want to die! 


I found this interesting, from an article about NJ residents not being able to afford to live in NJ anymore---

_Some residents said they prefer to support the NJ SMART bill. Under NJ SMART, which stands for save money and reform taxes, *half of education funding *would come from income taxes instead of property taxes.

Id rather see an income tax because if you make a lot of money, you pay more taxes and when you make less money, like when you retire, you pay less, _


and this headline from CNN: _New Jersey and New York homeowners face the highest property taxes in the United States_


NO! I am sorry- this is a REAL problem! Right now, I cannot be so generous with my tax money b/c I am worried about some kid's education!!!! 
I am sure other NJ residents, who can't afford to keep their homes b/c our taxes continue to go up and some have just DOUBLED, would agree with me!

Oh- how nice it would be, if our paychecks went up as much as our tax increases!


----------



## momomonster

I feel yer pain, maddhatir, I really do. Public education funding needs a total overhaul in my opinion. Keeping it local only acts to reinforce the class system because poor area schools are funded poorly and wealthy areas are funded well. SO much for a level playing field.

Here in my area those over 62 are exempt from a lot of property taxes with the assumption people that age do not have kids in the public schools. Well, folks are having kids later and later, so it's entirely possible to be 62 and have several kids in the system. They're getting a break for no good reason! Who has to take up the slack? ? ? Me!

Our house has been reappraised higher for the last two years and we've appealed both times successfully. 

P.S- Totally OT- Have you seen Dead Man? It's my favorite movie of all time (but I am weird, so YMMV) and Johnny plays the main character. He's so sweet in it.


----------



## maddhatir

momomonster said:


> P.S- Totally OT- Have you seen Dead Man? It's my favorite movie of all time (but I am weird, so YMMV) and Johnny plays the main character. He's so sweet in it.



Thank god for being OT! I hate talking about taxes 

No- I have not seen it. I do, however, have plenty of still pics FROM the movie-  

I really should just sit down and order every one of his movies from Deep Discount all at once. 

I did just see _The Man Who Cried _for the first time about a month ago.


----------



## kennancat

Muushka said:


> But I do have a problem with the tax dollars not being spent properly, cries for more money, children knocking on my door asking me to buy something to support their school or people at work selling tickets to something or candy bars.  Oy.


Totally agree with you there - I do sometimes wonder if education would be more successful if it were run more like a business than a nonprofit. I think a lot of money goes in to it without seeing the results we should be seeing for that kind of investment. I certainly have no problem with expecting the schools to spend my tax dollars wisely!


----------



## raspberrysharpei

I just wanted to pop in and stay thank you for all the different views in regards to my question.  It seems as though I may have chosen a topic that can be easily argued.  I found the reply about applying school taxes per child to be a great solution.  Being CF, I don't mind contributing some tax dollars to public education, however, not being offered deductions or a credit each year, chaps my butt.  I'd love to give my dog a social security number, he costs just as much as a kid


----------



## maddhatir

raspberrysharpei said:


> *I'd love to give my dog a social security number, he costs just as much as a kid*



OMG- I took mom's kitty to the University of Penn Vet Hospital a few weeks back- It cost me almost $$1000.00 !!! 

When the doctor told me the tests Patches needed, of course I said YES please just find out what is wrong with her-- after she started listing all the tests and prices I almost fell off of my chair!!! I was trying to keep the shocked look off of my face as I told her to go ahead and do what needs to be done There would be no way I would say no.

There was a guy in the waiting room coming to pick up his RAT! He is a musician and travels a lot (he is from Philly and has a "home base" condo in the city) and has always had rats as pets. He said they are easy to take with him.  He was in Key West when this rat started having his tooth problem- the guy bought a seat for the rat, flew home to go to U of Penn to have him checked out- they had to extract the tooth and keep the little guy overnight. The owner was there to pick him up.  He said over the years he has always taken his rats to U Penn b/c he knows they will get good care. 

......I wonder if you can get pet insurance for rats


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> OMG- I took mom's kitty to the University of Penn Vet Hospital a few weeks back- It cost me almost $$1000.00 !!!
> 
> When the doctor told me the tests Patches needed, of course I said YES please just find out what is wrong with her-- after she started listing all the tests and prices I almost fell off of my chair!!! I was trying to keep the shocked look off of my face as I told her to go ahead and do what needs to be done There would be no way I would say no.
> 
> There was a guy in the waiting room coming to pick up his RAT! He is a musician and travels a lot (he is from Philly and has a "home base" condo in the city) and has always had rats as pets. He said they are easy to take with him.  He was in Key West when this rat started having his tooth problem- the guy bought a seat for the rat, flew home to go to U of Penn to have him checked out- they had to extract the tooth and keep the little guy overnight. The owner was there to pick him up.  He said over the years he has always taken his rats to U Penn b/c he knows they will get good care.
> 
> ......I wonder if you can get pet insurance for rats



I don't know about rats but we have insurance for Duncan. It has come in handy a couple of times.

I swear every year when I fill out my income taxes that I am going to list Duncan as a dependent. Then I think about the IRS showing up at my door and come to my senses.


----------



## ChisJo

Hixski said:


> I don't know about rats but we have insurance for Duncan. It has come in handy a couple of times.
> 
> I swear every year when I fill out my income taxes that I am going to list Duncan as a dependent. Then I think about the IRS showing up at my door and come to my senses.



We can buy pet insurance here for any pets for $12/year....well worth the investment, especially if I had to take my Patches to the vet and it cost over $1000 - at least that would be covered. And, if I think about it, If she lived to be 15 years old, the total cost of the insurance over her life would only be $180.


----------



## Hixski

ChisJo said:


> We can buy pet insurance here for any pets for $12/year....well worth the investment, especially if I had to take my Patches to the vet and it cost over $1000 - at least that would be covered. And, if I think about it, If she lived to be 15 years old, the total cost of the insurance over her life would only be $180.



That is really cheap for insurance. I think ours is around $28 a month. I can live with that.

We are going to WDW and the DCL cruise in a couple of weeks. Duncan will be going to the kennel. He loves it there and they spoil him rotten. But.....all that spoiling comes at a price. We will be paying for 11 nights and 10 days of Doggy Daycamp. Doggy Daycamp includes Yappy Hour. Duncan will spend all his time in Daycamp in the pool. My bill last year for 13 nights came to $550. His vacation cost as much as taking a kid with me.


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> We can buy pet insurance here for any pets for $12/year....well worth the investment, especially if I had to take my Patches to the vet and it cost over $1000 - at least that would be covered. And, if I think about it, If she lived to be 15 years old, the total cost of the insurance over her life would only be $180.



I know I should have gotten it long ago! But they state they do not cover pre-existing conditions (hyperthyroidism).

I am going to look into it for the other cat now.


----------



## LuvsEpcot

raspberrysharpei said:


> Hello all (I'm prepared for the flames )
> I am hoping some of you can point me in the right direction.  (Quick explanation)...I am enrolled in English course, addressing issues of Argument. The requirement is to create a series of argument essays and the instructor suggests to choose one issue that can be used for the semester.
> 
> I have located a few books such as "The Baby Boon", and "Child-free & Loving It". (Found them-have not received them).
> 
> Does anyone have an opinion that our government may be promoting or encouraging people to have children based on tax deductions, tax credits, etc.
> 
> Does anyone have a suggested reading or resource list??
> 
> Thanks,
> DEE



Hey Dee,

Has anyone checked into the fact that the fertility drugs seemed to be terribly misused IMO. I've noticed on TV that women are giving birth to multiples and apparently that's not enough, they go back for more treatments and have multiples again.  WHY?  My DH and I talked about this one evening and I thought about our society and the anti-abortionists and think that our society have become enablers. People in communities who are generous and kind tend to help these multiple-birth people out by "donating" everything including houses!!!  I have watched these parents try to go through a day taking care of these children and it just makes me cringe  .  I just don't understand how a couple can possibly say that they cannot choose just one or two babies and say that they cannot destoy a life that "God" has created, when it was science that was truly at work and the strength of the human genectic makeup. Come on people admit that science and great human minds made it possible for you to give birth to a litter. We really weren't meant to do that and when God's hand is in it, it usually doesn't happen that way. This argument really isn't about God vs Science, it's about good old common sense!


----------



## Muushka

LuvsEpcot said:


> Hey Dee,
> 
> Has anyone checked into the fact that the fertility drugs seemed to be terribly misused IMO. I've noticed on TV that women are giving birth to multiples and apparently that's not enough, they go back for more treatments and have multiples again.  WHY?  My DH and I talked about this one evening and I thought about our society and the anti-abortionists and think that our society have become enablers. People in communities who are generous and kind tend to help these multiple-birth people out by "donating" everything including houses!!!  I have watched these parents try to go through a day taking care of these children and it just makes me cringe  .  I just don't understand how a couple can possibly say that they cannot choose just one or two babies and say that they cannot destoy a life that "God" has created, when it was science that was truly at work and the strength of the human genectic makeup. Come on people admit that science and great human minds made it possible for you to give birth to a litter. We really weren't meant to do that and when God's hand is in it, it usually doesn't happen that way. This argument really isn't about God vs Science, it's about good old common sense!



While I will agree with you that people who go through extraordinary measures to conceive probably should not, I will not agree that the children are disposable because of the way they were created.  
God allowed it.  This is like the abortion issue.  Everyone will have an opinion about it and nobody will agree.   
And believe me, this person (me) has a lot of common sense.  I've gone for 50+ years without giving birth!


----------



## momomonster

LuvsEpcot didn't say CHILDREN are disposable (NO ONE says that), so if you are "disagreeing" with that idea you are putting words into her mouth. She is pointing out the hypocrisy of people who attribute everything they like to God and everything they don't to science, man, the Devil, or whatever else. I agree with her 100%.


----------



## maddhatir

LuvsEpcot said:


> *I just don't understand how a couple can possibly say that they cannot choose just one or two babies and say that they cannot destoy a life that "God" has created,* Come on people admit that science and great human minds made it possible for you to give birth to a litter.



A litter 

OK this is just a question- do you mean choose one or two of the embyos, get rid of the rest, instead of giving birth to the whole litter???


----------



## Muushka

momomonster said:


> LuvsEpcot didn't say CHILDREN are disposable (NO ONE says that), so if you are "disagreeing" with that idea you are putting words into her mouth. She is pointing out the hypocrisy of people who attribute everything they like to God and everything they don't to science, man, the Devil, or whatever else. I agree with her 100%.



There lies the problem.  I believe that a baby is a child.  The OP said 





> I just don't understand how a couple can possibly say that they cannot choose just one or two babies and say that they cannot destoy a life that "God" has created, when it was science that was truly at work and the strength of the human genectic makeup.


I honestly do not know any other way to interpret this.  For some it would be all right to eliminate an embryo, fetus, baby, child, whatever because "man" created it.  I do not think that it is all right.  My opinion.  I am not asking you to agree with me.

This is a nice thread.  I hesitated posting because it always goes back to the abortion issue.  I will not debate this.  Sorry.  Done.


----------



## momomonster

Muushka said:


> I believe that a baby is a child.



Again, EVERYONE believes babies are children. If you want to say feti=children, THEN there is a debatable topic. Until you're honest enough to do so, you have no basis for argument.

And while we're being honest, lets admit God/mother nature/The Force/The Flying Spaghetti Monster is responsible for most abortions since roughly half of all fertilized eggs never make it through development because the replicating DNA goes wonky, it never attaches to the uterus, or any number of reasons.

I'm saying all of this as a 36 year old woman who has NEVER been pregnant (as far as I know), so I'm not trying to justify anything.


----------



## momomonster

maddhatir said:


> No- I have not seen it. I do, however, have plenty of still pics FROM the movie-
> 
> I really should just sit down and order every one of his movies from Deep Discount all at once.
> 
> I did just see _The Man Who Cried _for the first time about a month ago.



I didn't know about The Man Who Cried. Thanks, I've added it to my Netflix Q. I wasn't crazy about Sleepy Hollow (another Christina Ricci/JD movie), but it was a long time ago and could have been my mood. . .

Dead Man is so wonderful, one of those amazing artsy sleeper films. I think it slipped by most people because the filmmaker and distributor couldn't see eye-to-eye and it wasn't promoted properly. DH and I were the only ones in the theater to see it opening weekend, along with one other guy! Granted, this was before JD found mass-market success.

Dead Man has an all-star cast, too; Gabriel Byrne, Robert Mitchum, John Hurt, Crispin Glover, Billy Bob Thorton, Iggy Pop. . .Gary Farmer is amazing in it, too.


----------



## maddhatir

momomonster said:


> Dead Man has an all-star cast, too; Gabriel Byrne, Robert Mitchum, John Hurt, Crispin Glover, Billy Bob Thorton, Iggy Pop. . .Gary Farmer is amazing in it, too.




I love Crispin Glover, you do not see him around that much! He was in Gilbert Grape w/ JD too, another awesome movie, I can watch over and over- have you seen it?

Billy Bob!! DH and I can watch ANYTHING he is in- we love him as an actor! Very neurotic in real life, have you ever heard him talking about his OCD I love him! 

And Iggy? I wonder if that is how they became friends- or if they knew each other before the film??


----------



## momomonster

maddhatir said:


> I love Crispin Glover, you do not see him around that much! He was in Gilbert Grape w/ JD too, another awesome movie, I can watch over and over- have you seen it?
> 
> Billy Bob!! DH and I can watch ANYTHING he is in- we love him as an actor! Very neurotic in real life, have you ever heard him talking about his OCD I love him!
> 
> And Iggy? I wonder if that is how they became friends- or if they knew each other before the film??



LOVE Gilbert Grape, I could watch it over and over, too. If you like Crispin Glover, then I think you will like Dead Man because it's a bit unnerving like his personality. He only has a bit part, but it's great.

Billy Bob was still a chunky dude when Dead Man was filmed, and he's a fur trader wrapped in all these furs, so you might not immediately recognize him, but you'll definitely know that voice! We love him, too. . . Bad Santa? Comic genius!  

I haven't heard him talk about his OCD, but I bet it's funny. . . I'll go do a youtube search. . .

I have no idea when Iggy and JD met, but I would guess it was prior to the movie since he already owned that club in LA.


----------



## LuvsEpcot

maddhatir said:


> A litter
> 
> OK this is just a question- do you mean choose one or two of the embyos, get rid of the rest, instead of giving birth to the whole litter???



Yes maddhatir, that's exactly what I mean. When people go through the fertility process they will normally have several fertilized eggs, so instead of being realistic about having one or two hopefully healthy babies they don't want to be the one to play "god" and say "let's keep 1 or 2" and be okay with that decision. We are so afraid of what others will think of us. Anyone that goes through the fertility process should know early on that there is a probability they will have several fertilized eggs. As educated, mature persons that want to be parents, they should have to "own up" to the responsiblity to make the decision. If they don't seriously think that it will come to that, then they have not done their homework on the subject, and I feel, are not ready to become parents. If they cannot make that first tough choice, then what about the future of their "litter?"  

I'm not trying to debate the abortion issue, everyone is free to feel how they feel about that subject. Just don't ever take my daughter's rights away, please!  My point is, I'm tired of seeing people rewarded for acting like they're doing such a noble thing when in my humble opinion it is cowardly for not making a mature, educated choice when the time comes. They act and say they had no choice, when that is so far from the truth. 

I turned 50 last week and have two daughters 20  and age 25 . During their maturing process I have been tested on every serious issue I've ever believed strongly in. It has been a very enlightening process. I'm so glad that I broke out of my parents' mold and became a free thinker and in turn allowed the same for my girls. I won't say it's been easy, but it is rewarding when you see the "lightbulb moment."


----------



## maddhatir

LuvsEpcot said:


> Yes maddhatir, that's exactly what I mean. When people go through the fertility process they will normally have several fertilized eggs, so instead of being realistic about having one or two hopefully healthy babies they don't want to be the one to play "god" and say "let's keep 1 or 2" and be okay with that decision. We are so afraid of what others will think of us. Anyone that goes through the fertility process should know early on that there is a probability they will have several fertilized eggs. As educated, mature persons that want to be parents, they should have to "own up" to the responsiblity to make the decision. If they don't seriously think that it will come to that, then they have not done their homework on the subject, and I feel, are not ready to become parents. If they cannot make that first tough choice, then what about the future of their "litter?"
> 
> I'm not trying to debate the abortion issue, everyone is free to feel how they feel about that subject. Just don't ever take my daughter's rights away, please!  My point is, I'm tired of seeing people rewarded for acting like they're doing such a noble thing when in my humble opinion it is cowardly for not making a mature, educated choice when the time comes. They act and say they had no choice, when that is so far from the truth.
> 
> I turned 50 last week and have two daughters 20  and age 25 . During their maturing process I have been tested on every serious issue I've ever believed strongly in. It has been a very enlightening process. I'm so glad that I broke out of my parents' mold and became a free thinker and in turn allowed the same for my girls. I won't say it's been easy, but it is rewarding when you see the "lightbulb moment."



I agree with what you are saying. 

DH and I watched this show about this family with like 18 kids!!!!  They were building this HUGE house with an industrial kitchen, it was just crazy.

I did not get to finish watching it! I wanted to see who was paying for this house- I DOUBT it was him.


----------



## LuvsEpcot

maddhatir said:


> I agree with what you are saying.
> 
> DH and I watched this show about this family with like 18 kids!!!!  They were building this HUGE house with an industrial kitchen, it was just crazy.
> 
> I did not get to finish watching it! I wanted to see who was paying for this house- I DOUBT it was him.



I know the show you're talking about and believe it or not, they are paying for everything they own, and they buy used, scratch & dent stuff.  I actually have to applaud this family they are very self sufficient and do not rely on any outside help. She is Fertile Myrtle and they want a HUGE family and they are devote christians. Before they started on their family they invested like crazy in real estate and bought land that they knew they wanted to build their dream home on.  See, they thought it out, saved, invested, and planned for it. Also they have a buddy system so that everytime she has a child and it is old enough to be weaned the next oldest sibling in line begins caring and mentoring it. They run a tight ship and everyone does their part. They built their house from scratch, bringing in expertise when needed. They wanted the experience because the children are homeschooled so they use any and every excuse to teach the children anything and everything. It's really great because they are not wanting nor expecting anyone's assistance and their children will grow up to appreciate things so much more.

I know you probably think I'm crazy for applauding them, but this family is sooo opposite from what I was ranting about. They educated themselves and were prepared for whatever may come, and Mom and Dad actually look like they are rested and very happy.


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## kennancat

LuvsEpcot said:


> Yes maddhatir, that's exactly what I mean. When people go through the fertility process they will normally have several fertilized eggs, so instead of being realistic about having one or two hopefully healthy babies they don't want to be the one to play "god" and say "let's keep 1 or 2" and be okay with that decision. We are so afraid of what others will think of us. Anyone that goes through the fertility process should know early on that there is a probability they will have several fertilized eggs. As educated, mature persons that want to be parents, they should have to "own up" to the responsiblity to make the decision. If they don't seriously think that it will come to that, then they have not done their homework on the subject, and I feel, are not ready to become parents. If they cannot make that first tough choice, then what about the future of their "litter?"


A good example of what you're referring to is the McCaughey family (and I'm thrilled that I had to go the the internet to look that nameup, as opposed to the Duggar family, which has been burned into my brain). This is the family where the mom took Clomid and ended up with septuplets, but would not consider selective reduction. From what I've seen online, two of those kids do suffer from cerebral palsy. Personally, I believe that if you won't consider selective reduction, you have no business taking Clomid. Same goes with IVF of putting 4-5 embryos in at once. My feeling is that people shouldn't start down this road unless they are prepared to deal with all the difficult decisions down it. In other words, if you're going to play God, play God the whole way through 

We've had a few friends go through IVF so I've had some exposure to that procedure. They did fertilize multiple eggs, but our friends chose to implant no more than two at a time for the exact reasons listed above. Also, fertility clinics now have to report successful pregnancies as well as multiple pregnancies - I don't know all the reasons behind it, but I know there's some stuff in place that makes multiples less desirable, so many of the clinics won't put in a whole bunch anymore hoping that at least one will make it. I think they didn't use to have to report the multiples, only the successful pregnancies, which didn't exactly encourage responsible behavior. Anyway, the eggs that are not implanted are usually put in cryogenic storage. As to what happens with any unused embryos, I think the choices are to donate them to other infertile couples, donate to scientific research, or have them destroyed. I know at least one couple we know did have unused ones and were struggling with what to do with them. Needless to say, I have not asked if/what they decided - figure that's a tough choice and none of my business.


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## momomonster

LuvsEpcot said:


> Also they have a buddy system so that everytime she has a child and it is old enough to be weaned the next oldest sibling in line begins caring and mentoring it. They run a tight ship and everyone does their part.



I, myself, have a huge problem with this. The KIDS didn't choose this. They weren't asked "Hey, is it OK if you become the babysitter for Jr. # 14?" (WHILE they're still children themselves!) There is no way on earth this family can give each child the attention each deserves.

Gross. And her body has to be SHOT.


----------



## LuvsEpcot

kennancat said:


> Personally, I believe that if you won't consider selective reduction, you have no business taking Clomid. Same goes with IVF of putting 4-5 embryos in at once. My feeling is that people shouldn't start down this road unless they are prepared to deal with all the difficult decisions down it. In other words, if you're going to play God, play God the whole way through
> 
> Amen to that kennancat!


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## LuvsEpcot

momomonster said:


> I, myself, have a huge problem with this. The KIDS didn't choose this. They weren't asked "Hey, is it OK if you become the babysitter for Jr. # 14?" (WHILE they're still children themselves!) There is no way on earth this family can give each child the attention each deserves.
> 
> Gross. And her body has to be SHOT.



I agree with you on this, it doesn't seem fair to the children that mom and dad want to continue procreating. 

It seems as though they are trying to create their own state


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## momomonster

And I agree with you that it's good to see this family putting SOME thought into having their litter and taking responsibility for their schooling (so the community isn't forced to pay for educating their litter family).


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## LoveStitch626

Hey guys! :eeping out of lurkdom:: Ok I haven't even been lurking. Just the other day I realized how long it had been since I came to check on yall. 

Work is finally picking up for me. Lots of clients booking WDW. Yall will be happy to know I'm doing a series of articles for work on "WDW for couples" (and including singles/people traveling without kids in general). As a matter of fact, I'd love to get yalls input on things. What are some of the things yall love doing most at WDW, places you love to stay or eat, etc etc. Just fill me with as much CF/couples only WDW stuff you can. You can PM them to me if you want. I know I want to wrap up the entire series with Walt's vision & not catering to JUST kids. 

Between rescuing a new kitten the day before 4th of July (it was raining SO hard and this poor little guy was sitting in a puddle!!), the new Potter movie & book coming out, friends coming in from out of town slowly moving all their stuff down (they're moving in with us for a few months until they get jobs and get on their feet), friend drama (  ), and everything else I haven't had a chance to get on here. Been doing Weight Watchers so I've been super grouchy lol. Oh btw, does anyone play VMK? 

Kirklandtutu, are you a dance teacher? I'm assuming so since I saw all the ballet shoes in the pic you posted. 

Yall have to see this video (especially Kirkland.. if  you're a dance teacher you can really appreciate this one!). I'm posting the ORIGINAL and then the dubbed over. Just watch maybe 30-60 seconds of the original. Make sure your sound is up. 

Original:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=PFhXyns6vzE

The REALLY REALLY cool one:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=NIGbhPLZmjY


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## maddhatir

momomonster said:


> I, myself, have a huge problem with this. The KIDS didn't choose this. They weren't asked "Hey, is it OK if you become the babysitter for Jr. # 14?" (WHILE they're still children themselves!) There is no way on earth this family can give each child the attention each deserves.
> 
> Gross. And her body has to be SHOT.



You know Momo! I was going to post the exact same thing a few posts back! The way I was trying to say it did not sound right though. 

But ITA! When you see those big families- all the children have, what seems to be, adult responsibilities. I am all for teaching your children to be responsible, but to me it looks like they are having kids, just to ....take care of all of the kids. They seem like little housekeepers and little mommies. 

I am sure the kids do not enjoy _having_ to take care of a younger child- they want to go out and play and be a kid- not have to be little adults 

They probably want to tell mom- to keep those legs shut!


----------



## maddhatir

LoveStitch626 said:


> Yall have to see this video (especially Kirkland.. if  you're a dance teacher you can really appreciate this one!). I'm posting the ORIGINAL and then the dubbed over. Just watch maybe 30-60 seconds of the original. Make sure your sound is up.
> 
> Original:
> http://youtube.com/watch?v=PFhXyns6vzE
> 
> The REALLY REALLY cool one:
> http://youtube.com/watch?v=NIGbhPLZmjY



Heyyyy you! Glad to see you popped in! -- oooooo, people living with you. Good luck! Make sure you keep us updated- we are hear to listen to your drama 

About the videos- who are these women??  I liked the first one, it reminded me of something from Austin Powers- or if I hear that kind of music- I always have to do a stupid 60's move to it   

But the 2nd one-- I couldn't listen to the music for more than 30 seconds- NOT a fan. The  dancing was pretty cool though. 

Wow- I am going to have to think of some nice "couple things" DH and I do while in Disney for you. 

You know, I MIGHT be going to Disney with SIL, BIL and their 2 kids the day after Thanksgiving- DH has come to hate Disney! So I am on my own for a while until he snaps out of it! But you know what-- I am not really excited to go. *I LOVE Disney- but I REALLY love Disney as a "couple" I feel I can relax and enjoy it*. So I MAY skip out on the trip. I have a room booked for myself- but I can cancel that without a problem. I just know if I book air- that's it- I am committed- so I continue to put it off 

And good for you, rescuing a kitty! Are you going to keep him!?


----------



## LoveStitch626

maddhatir said:


> Heyyyy you! Glad to see you popped in! -- oooooo, people living with you. Good luck! Make sure you keep us updated- we are hear to listen to your drama
> 
> About the videos- who are these women??  I liked the first one, it reminded me of something from Austin Powers- or if I hear that kind of music- I always have to do a stupid 60's move to it
> 
> But the 2nd one-- I couldn't listen to the music for more than 30 seconds- NOT a fan. The  dancing was pretty cool though.
> 
> Wow- I am going to have to think of some nice "couple things" DH and I do while in Disney for you.
> 
> You know, I MIGHT be going to Disney with SIL, BIL and their 2 kids the day after Thanksgiving- DH has come to hate Disney! So I am on my own for a while until he snaps out of it! But you know what-- I am not really excited to go. *I LOVE Disney- but I REALLY love Disney as a "couple" I feel I can relax and enjoy it*. So I MAY skip out on the trip. I have a room booked for myself- but I can cancel that without a problem. I just know if I book air- that's it- I am committed- so I continue to put it off
> 
> And good for you, rescuing a kitty! Are you going to keep him!?



We've lived with 2 friends before. 1 of those friends is one half of the couple moving in again. No biggie. We've done it before and we get along well. They're like my kiddos. 

The redheaded woman in the video is Gwen Verdon. Famous dancer. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gwen_Verdon

The dance routine is a Fosse routine that I **believe** was done on the Sullivan show in the 60s? LOL I'm not a fan of rap either, but I thought it was amazing how well the song went w/ the routine. You can see from the first video that nothing was altered or changed really. It just blows my mind how a completely different dance routine from 40 years ago can go SO WELL with a rap song from now. With the song, lol the dance is pretty cool. 

LOL You're gonna have to straighten dh up with the disney hating!!  May the Depp be with you lol


----------



## Shyvioletisme

Hi! Hope you guys don't mind me joining your thread I just came across it. DH and I have been married almost 2 years and will not be having children. Neither of us like children(heck, I didn't like kids when I was a kid...lol!), so it's never been an issue. We just always discussed that we didn't ever want to force kids onto our selves just because that's what everyone expects of you. That is the selfish thing in my opinion.  We've already gotten so many questions, always follows the how long have you been married and then straight into when are you having kids. I just let it roll off me. I have a cat who is my "baby." I've had cats my whole life and LOVE them to death and they are plenty for me. Anyway, just glad I found some other people who are no children people! Now, I'm gonna keep reading through the thread!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> Neither of us like children(heck, I didn't like kids when I was a kid...lol!), so it's never been an issue.



Welcome Tiffany! Stick around!  

Your Kitty is adorable! (assuming that's your kitty in your avatar!  )

Speaking of being a kid- when I make mention to my mother I do not like kids- she ALWAYS says "you were a kid once!" My reply after 20+ years (you think she would stop with the same comment by now ) It was not MY choice to be brought into this world- that was YOUR choice. So- really, me being a kid once- has NOTHING at all to do with me not liking other people's kids 

She NEVER harassed me about having kids- never. She never asked when or why.....She just KNEW DH and I never wanted kids- and she respects that.

ETA- and OMG- how can you stand being a teacher if you do not _like_ kids??????


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Welcome Tiffany! Stick around!
> 
> Your Kitty is adorable! (assuming that's your kitty in your avatar!  )
> 
> Speaking of being a kid- when I make mention to my mother I do not like kids- she ALWAYS says "you were a kid once!" My reply after 20+ years (you think she would stop with the same comment by now ) It was not MY choice to be brought into this world- that was YOUR choice. So- really, me being a kid once- has NOTHING at all to do with me not liking other people's kids
> 
> She NEVER harassed me about having kids- never. She never asked when or why.....She just KNEW DH and I never wanted kids- and she respects that.
> 
> ETA- and OMG- how can you stand being a teacher if you do not _like_ kids??????




yes that is my Kitty, Lestat! thanks!!

my mom doesn't harass me and DH either, she knew how little interaction I wanted with kids when I was little and understands... DH's parents on the otherhand, say they understand But we both know they want us to have kids...it's not like they don't  have grandchildren, they do (DH's bro has 2 kids and his sis has 1) I feel like they should be blessed that they they already have 3 grandkids and not worry about why we won't have one..At least they don't insist about kids too much. I can usually just ignore it. lol
However, much as I don't like kids, they sure like me...lol. Just the way it is I guess.


----------



## KirklandTutu

Oh yes, I do love that video.  I've seen it before and never get tired of it.  

Someone asked how you can be a teacher and not like children?  It's hard to explain, but it's how I am.  I think it has to do with being able to send them home at the end of the day while I go home for a glass of wine.  


And my favorite thing to do at Disney as a couple without children?  Go to Epcot, get a drink, sit down where you have a clear view of a public pathway, and watch all the people WITH kids.  Truly, truly entertaining.


Funny story, I was at California Adventure last year, walking around with a glass of wine.  Some woman with three kids under the age of 7 came up to me with this totally frazzled look on her face, demanding to know where I got the drink.   I became her hero when I told her of the multiple places that one could gain such a thing.


----------



## Hixski

LoveStitch626 said:


> Hey guys! :eeping out of lurkdom:: Ok I haven't even been lurking. Just the other day I realized how long it had been since I came to check on yall.
> 
> Work is finally picking up for me. Lots of clients booking WDW. Yall will be happy to know I'm doing a series of articles for work on "WDW for couples" (and including singles/people traveling without kids in general). As a matter of fact, I'd love to get yalls input on things. What are some of the things yall love doing most at WDW, places you love to stay or eat, etc etc. Just fill me with as much CF/couples only WDW stuff you can. You can PM them to me if you want. I know I want to wrap up the entire series with Walt's vision & not catering to JUST kids.
> 
> Between rescuing a new kitten the day before 4th of July (it was raining SO hard and this poor little guy was sitting in a puddle!!), the new Potter movie & book coming out, friends coming in from out of town slowly moving all their stuff down (they're moving in with us for a few months until they get jobs and get on their feet), friend drama (  ), and everything else I haven't had a chance to get on here. Been doing Weight Watchers so I've been super grouchy lol. Oh btw, does anyone play VMK?
> 
> Kirklandtutu, are you a dance teacher? I'm assuming so since I saw all the ballet shoes in the pic you posted.
> 
> Yall have to see this video (especially Kirkland.. if  you're a dance teacher you can really appreciate this one!). I'm posting the ORIGINAL and then the dubbed over. Just watch maybe 30-60 seconds of the original. Make sure your sound is up.
> 
> Original:
> http://youtube.com/watch?v=PFhXyns6vzE
> 
> The REALLY REALLY cool one:
> http://youtube.com/watch?v=NIGbhPLZmjY



I am trying to think of the adult things DH and I do at Disney. We don't try to do romantic dinners or anything. I guess we just go with the flow. We make our ADRs but the rest of the time we just decide what park we want to do for the day.

We like to hang out in Epcot. 
Grab a beer in England and a margarita in Mexico.
People watch from the bar in Africa at AK.
Ride Everest.
Grab a turkey leg to split in MGM.
Ride RNR coaster 3 or 4 times in a row. 
Same thing for TofT.
Pop over to MK and do the circuit.
Head to the Poly or Contemporary and have a drink or 2 in the afternoon. 

We just enjoy our time there. It is funny to watch families with kids having meltdowns with each other. It makes you think how easy it is for us.



Shyvioletisme said:


> yes that is my Kitty, Lestat! thanks!!
> 
> my mom doesn't harass me and DH either, she knew how little interaction I wanted with kids when I was little and understands... DH's parents on the otherhand, say they understand But we both know they want us to have kids...it's not like they don't  have grandchildren, they do (DH's bro has 2 kids and his sis has 1) I feel like they should be blessed that they they already have 3 grandkids and not worry about why we won't have one..At least they don't insist about kids too much. I can usually just ignore it. lol
> However, much as I don't like kids, they sure like me...lol. Just the way it is I guess.



You have a vampire kitty!!! I love it! Welcome to our thread. We all do understand one another on here.


----------



## luvthemouse71

momomonster said:


> I, myself, have a huge problem with this. The KIDS didn't choose this. They weren't asked "Hey, is it OK if you become the babysitter for Jr. # 14?" (WHILE they're still children themselves!) There is no way on earth this family can give each child the attention each deserves.
> 
> Gross. And her body has to be SHOT.


Agreed-I'm surprised her uterus doesn't fall out.(and her Hoo Hoo has got to be the size of the Grand Canyon. Kegels only take you so far! ) Personally, I'd rather have both eyes gouged out than give birth to 18 kids(yuck) but I am happy at least that they are not subsidized by taxpayer money. I think this couple needs a hobby besides baby-making, but that's my humble opinion.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Is it even safe for her to be pregnant anymore??  My word hasn't the woman been introduced the pill.  I do have to wonder what is going to happen when all of those kids grow-up?

Oh it's extremely easy to work with kids and not have any.  Believe me I love children but I love giving them back more.


----------



## Liisa

Shyvioletisme said:


> yes that is my Kitty, Lestat! thanks!!



Welcome!!!!  Definitely stick around.  This is where all the cool people hang out!     And I LOVE your kitty's name.  Very original.  DH and I rescued our cat and she came with the name Sheba... ho hum.  But then my mom had to rescue Sheba away from our house.  My 10 month old monster of a puppy was pouncing on her.  Ugh!  Kids!   



maddhatir said:


> DH has come to hate Disney! So I am on my own for a while until he snaps out of it!



Madd...  EEK!  Say it isn't so!  Blasphemy!!!!  Actually, DH and I have several WDW trips coming up in the near future (Sept, Dec and January).  But the trip we are totally excited for is the May trip to Mexico (decided on and booked the Iberostar Grand Hotel Paraiso!)  WooHoo - bring on the sexy, fruity drinks on the beach!!!   



LoveStitch626 said:


> As a matter of fact, I'd love to get yalls input on things. What are some of the things yall love doing most at WDW, places you love to stay or eat, etc etc.



Good luck with the weight watchers.  Dieting always makes me cranky!!!  That is why I started running, now I don't feel so guilty when I have a cookie...and a brownie... and a few nibbles of cake.... and some ice cream...  Hmmmm, I've definitely got sugar issues!  

As for my two cents for couple things to do... DH and I just love being able to wander the parks freely with no little ones in tow.  We tour the parks in the morning, head back to the hotel for a swim break and shower and then back out for the evening.  Soooo relaxing.  Plus, we can head over to the Adventurer's Club at night and stay as long as we want.  We've also done the romantic dinners at Cali Grill and Bistro de Paris.  We love skipping lunch and sampling food and drinks around world showcase (which I imagine would be tougher with kids that need to stay on schedule and may not like some of the food offerings around world showcase.




Hixski said:


> We just enjoy our time there. It is funny to watch families with kids having meltdowns with each other. It makes you think how easy it is for us.



Hixski, we are with you.  I really feel bad for those parents and I know it is tough... but those are the moments that DH and I smile at each other and feel happy that our lives are so peaceful.


----------



## LoveStitch626

luvthemouse71 said:


> and her Hoo Hoo has got to be the size of the Grand Canyon. Kegels only take you so far!



LMAO That's got to be the best line ever!!!!!!!


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> Funny story, I was at California Adventure last year, walking around with a glass of wine.  Some woman with three kids under the age of 7 came up to me with this totally frazzled look on her face, demanding to know where I got the drink.   I became her hero when I told her of the multiple places that one could gain such a thing.



Sounds like me the first time DH and I took our neice to Disney- she was 4 at the time. We were rushing to get to the princess breakfast in Norway b/c we were late- After rushing around all morning- running through EPCOT to get there in time, I am sure there was a tantrum thrown in there somewhere!.........We finally were seated and the first thing out of my mouth to our adorable waiter was........MIMOSA.........NOW....PLEASE!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Hixski, we are with you.  I really feel bad for those parents and I know it is tough... but those are the moments that DH and I smile at each other and feel happy that our lives are so peaceful.



I am with Hix and Liisa also! 

~~We love just sitting somewhere, drink in hand, relaxing and enjoying each other, ....... and watching the poor parents ........and to quote DH........."better them than us".........my answer......"amen"

Thinking about it- I have so many, and some of them are the littlest things, but just so nice. I hope you all do not mind if I just post them all here, I think this is fun reading our favorite CF things to do!

DTD/PI 

~~Adventurers Club is a MUST! 
~~Check the House of Blues website before you leave for Disney. They always have some really good bands playing. Just for a little something different to do.
~~Love to stroll through DTD, again, drinks in hand from the little bar down at the dock. DH sometimes just sits on a bench relaxing and people watching while I shop alittle. Every now and then I have to run out of the store just to see him  and run back into a few more 

MK

~~Opening the MK and when all the parents are RUNNING to get their little ones to Dumbo or wake up Tink- we stop at the Main Street Bakery, grab something sinfully sweet and yummy with some coffee, take our yummies and sit outside and enjoy the morning peace and quiet of Main Street-- of course the ducks will see to it that you get no peace!
~~ taking a stroll through the rose garden and sitting in the gazebo
~~ sitting on the rocking chairs in Liberty Square
~~ taking a leisurely ride on the "wedway people mover"  
~~ of course, there is always a challenge between us on Buzz Lightyear! 
~~ watching WISHES over by It's a Small World almost completely alone. and after the fireworks take the long way back to Main Street through LS and Adventureland......and of course, to top the evening off, stopping at Casey's Corner for some fries to munch on while watching all the people make a mad RUSH to the exit.....why??! 

EPCOT

~~The ENTIRE World Showcase is just so nice to stroll though. This is actually DH's favorite park. Stroll, drink, relax and people watch, aaaaand repeat! 
~~take a nice walk over to the Boardwalk or the Beach and Yacht Club from EPCOT at night. Very nice.

MGM

~~ mmmmm- not much at MGM that I care for as just a couple, of course ToT is a BLAST! I like MGM at night or about an hour before closing- less people and more relaxing. If you go for the Osborne lights, it is great to walk thought the streets while it is snowing! 
~~ It used to be nice when the Brown Derby was not PACKED all of the time b/c of the dining plan- it was a nice place to relax and have lunch.......for (1) TS credit. Yes, I remember those days...do you?

AK

~~Walking through Pangani Forest trail, we just like to find all of the "nooks and crannies" hiding in the park. 

Sorry so long!


----------



## Hixski

Did anyone notice that there seems be to a lot of drinking at WDW by us CF folks???
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	







*MADD:* I was just over on a remodeling thread I subscribe too. I just remembered you are adding on an addition. You might want to check this out: http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1379800


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## luvthemouse71

Mrs.Reese said:


> Is it even safe for her to be pregnant anymore??  My word hasn't the woman been introduced the pill.  I do have to wonder what is going to happen when all of those kids grow-up?
> 
> Oh it's extremely easy to work with kids and not have any.  Believe me I love children but I love giving them back more.


Well, women who have had a few kids are at risk after giving birth for post-partum hemmorrhage(the uterus can take longer to "clamp down" after the birth process and that's where the hemmorrhage can occur). I also doubt she's interested in the pill-I think they are fundamentalist Christians. If I were one of the older kids, I'd be slipping them to her and telling her they're multivitamins or something.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Did anyone notice that there seems be to a lot of drinking at WDW by us CF folks???
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> *MADD:* I was just over on a remodeling thread I subscribe too. I just remembered you are adding on an addition. You might want to check this out: http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1379800



WOW Thanks Hix! The addition is ALMOST finished. 

I am going to check out the thread!


----------



## HockeyKat

luvthemouse71 said:


> Agreed-I'm surprised her uterus doesn't fall out.(and her Hoo Hoo has got to be the size of the Grand Canyon. Kegels only take you so far! ) Personally, I'd rather have both eyes gouged out than give birth to 18 kids(yuck) but I am happy at least that they are not subsidized by taxpayer money. I think this couple needs a hobby besides baby-making, but that's my humble opinion.



Hoo Hoo!   That is the 2nd time in the last 10 min that I have read that particular word/phrase on a disboards thread.  

I would also rather have my eyes gouged out that give birth to 18 (holy crap) kids.  18!!  

We do WDW R&R style... sleep late, hit a few park highlights, head back to the resort, pack a few beers in a cooler and head down to the pool for a while... maybe nap... head back to the park for an hour or so before dinner... after dinner pack a few more beers in a cooler to take down to the hot tub....


----------



## Liisa

HockeyKat said:


> Hoo Hoo!   That is the 2nd time in the last 10 min that I have read that particular word/phrase on a disboards thread.



Well, now... what other thread was this.  Any thread throwing around the term hoo hoo is probably a pretty entertaining read!!!


----------



## Hixski

Liisa said:


> Well, now... what other thread was this.  Any thread throwing around the term hoo hoo is probably a pretty entertaining read!!!



Here in the Midwest we would call that a Hoo Ha!! And for the gentlemen it would be a Wa Hoo!!!


----------



## Princess Bella Luna

Breathe From Your Hoo Hoo:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nL_RJRMcqms


----------



## zima-cheryl

LoveStitch626 said:


> As a matter of fact, I'd love to get yalls input on things. What are some of the things yall love doing most at WDW, places you love to stay or eat, etc etc. Just fill me with as much CF/couples only WDW stuff you can.



This isn't so much a thing to do, but something that makes it easier for us to get in everything we both want to ride.

The "chicken exits" are a great thing for people to be aware of.  My hubby loves thrill rides but not I.  We used to skip a lot of rides because he didn't want me to have to wait somewhere for him to stand in line & ride.  We were delighted to find out about the "chicken exits".  I enjoy seeing the queues and we can stay together for most the wait, then he hops on his ride & I wander out to the gift shop.  Usually the wait is just 5 or 10 minutes, and on some rides (like Rockin' Rollercoaster) you can wait and watch the pictures come up, and there are some funny ones!

This might be a good tip to include for couples.


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## zima-cheryl

Shyvioletisme said:


> yes that is my Kitty, Lestat! thanks!!



Tiffany - I take it you are an Anne Rice fan?

I enjoy her books, but can not read them too close to bed time!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

zima-cheryl said:


> Tiffany - I take it you are an Anne Rice fan?
> 
> I enjoy her books, but can not read them too close to bed time!



yes, DH and I are both huge fans... I could probably recite all of them from memory at this point, I've read them so many times! I have to admit, I started reading her books when I was in the 4th grade!!! lol. probably a little early for the content but oh well.  We'd love to get our kitty a friend and some point and give it another Anne Rice name, we really like Merrick for a kitty!


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## Liisa

Shyvioletisme,

You should help my mother name cats.  She adopted a cat that she called "Kitty" for years.  Until her vet told her the cat was overweight.  Now she calls the poor thing "Fat Cat".  Seriously, she even introduces the cat as "Fat Cat".  Since the cat is on a diet, I wonder what she's going to do if the kitty ever loses weight!


----------



## Kathi OD

maddhatir said:


> Thinking about it- I have so many, and some of them are the littlest things, but just so nice. I hope you all do not mind if I just post them all here, I think this is fun reading our favorite CF things to do!
> 
> DTD/PI
> 
> ~~Adventurers Club is a MUST!
> ~~Check the House of Blues website before you leave for Disney. They always have some really good bands playing. Just for a little something different to do.
> ~~Love to stroll through DTD, again, drinks in hand from the little bar down at the dock. DH sometimes just sits on a bench relaxing and people watching while I shop alittle. Every now and then I have to run out of the store just to see him  and run back into a few more
> 
> MK
> 
> ~~Opening the MK and when all the parents are RUNNING to get their little ones to Dumbo or wake up Tink- we stop at the Main Street Bakery, grab something sinfully sweet and yummy with some coffee, take our yummies and sit outside and enjoy the morning peace and quiet of Main Street-- of course the ducks will see to it that you get no peace!
> ~~ taking a stroll through the rose garden and sitting in the gazebo
> ~~ sitting on the rocking chairs in Liberty Square
> ~~ taking a leisurely ride on the "wedway people mover"
> ~~ of course, there is always a challenge between us on Buzz Lightyear!
> ~~ watching WISHES over by It's a Small World almost completely alone. and after the fireworks take the long way back to Main Street through LS and Adventureland......and of course, to top the evening off, stopping at Casey's Corner for some fries to munch on while watching all the people make a mad RUSH to the exit.....why??!
> 
> EPCOT
> 
> ~~The ENTIRE World Showcase is just so nice to stroll though. This is actually DH's favorite park. Stroll, drink, relax and people watch, aaaaand repeat!
> ~~take a nice walk over to the Boardwalk or the Beach and Yacht Club from EPCOT at night. Very nice.
> 
> MGM
> 
> ~~ mmmmm- not much at MGM that I care for as just a couple, of course ToT is a BLAST! I like MGM at night or about an hour before closing- less people and more relaxing. If you go for the Osborne lights, it is great to walk thought the streets while it is snowing!
> ~~ It used to be nice when the Brown Derby was not PACKED all of the time b/c of the dining plan- it was a nice place to relax and have lunch.......for (1) TS credit. Yes, I remember those days...do you?
> 
> AK
> 
> ~~Walking through Pangani Forest trail, we just like to find all of the "nooks and crannies" hiding in the park.
> 
> Sorry so long!



OK, so a little off topic, but DH and I are now empty nesters and planning our third childless trip in November.  While, I would not in a million years have traded the  child-rearing years and trips w/ the kids, I must say that your list just shows that people who do not have children can have a wonderful Disney experience without them.  Hope you don't mind that I've jotted down some of your favorite experiences and will be trying them out on our upcoming trip.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

Liisa said:


> Shyvioletisme,
> 
> You should help my mother name cats.  She adopted a cat that she called "Kitty" for years.  Until her vet told her the cat was overweight.  Now she calls the poor thing "Fat Cat".  Seriously, she even introduces the cat as "Fat Cat".  Since the cat is on a diet, I wonder what she's going to do if the kitty ever loses weight!



lol. well that's not any worse than my parents. They always have lots of cats cause they take in strays...now I can't tell you how many of them have had the same names over the years...when one dies and another who likes kinda similar comes in, same name....all so that they can keep remembering names...lol.


----------



## ChisJo

I have a favour to ask of someone....I really want to get a samurai sword in the Japanese pavillion in December when I go to Epcot (my ex got the other one in the divorce...and I really liked it, seeing as it was mine - but I didn't argue that one!), but being a Canadian, they won't ship to me here, they only ship to a USA address. I don't know anyone who lives in the states except for my Dis Friends, and I was wondering if anyone would be willing to accept a package for me and then ship it up to me here? I will, obviously, completely reimburse you for your troubles, and would be greatly appreciative of it. Please let me know! Thanks - Jo


----------



## zima-cheryl

Liisa said:


> Shyvioletisme,
> 
> You should help my mother name cats.  She adopted a cat that she called "Kitty" for years.  Until her vet told her the cat was overweight.  Now she calls the poor thing "Fat Cat".  Seriously, she even introduces the cat as "Fat Cat".  Since the cat is on a diet, I wonder what she's going to do if the kitty ever loses weight!



What is it w/parents & pet names?  My Dad would come up w/intentional goofy names - their current cat is named "Mouse" (I kid you not).  

Poor thing has such a complex & all the other cats laugh at her.


----------



## Liisa

zima-cheryl said:


> Poor thing has such a complex & all the other cats laugh at her.




    Too funny.


----------



## Liisa

Sorry - totally OT... but I know a few of you have done Mexico (the Cancun / Playa del Carmen area).  I'm wondering how careful you have to be with the water.  Can you brush your teeth with tap water?  Do you have to worry about the ice cubes in drinks?  What about frozen margaritas...?  (Can you tell it's our first time there?)  I just don't want to get sick   on something I could have avoided...

thanks!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Liisa said:


> Sorry - totally OT... but I know a few of you have done Mexico (the Cancun / Playa del Carmen area).  I'm wondering how careful you have to be with the water.  Can you brush your teeth with tap water?  Do you have to worry about the ice cubes in drinks?  What about frozen margaritas...?  (Can you tell it's our first time there?)  I just don't want to get sick   on something I could have avoided...
> 
> thanks!



Liisa,

We have been to Cancun several times & had no problems.  Of course you want to be in a good area & at a reputable hotel/resort.  Off the beaten path-- who knows?
 

We used tap water in our room for brushing our teeth & making coffee.  Also drank lots of frozen drinks!  The one precaution we did take was to drink bottled water instead of tap water.  But you will have no problems getting bottled water.

I would suggest you pack some imodium when you go.  Our problem actually was w/the food.  My husband prides himself on being a coinsure of spicy food & even he over did it a few times!  The food was great but as w/all things too spicy it will catch up w/you sooner or later!
 


Have a great time in Mexico!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> What is it w/parents & pet names?  My Dad would come up w/intentional goofy names - their current cat is named "Mouse" (I kid you not).
> 
> Poor thing has such a complex & all the other cats laugh at her.



  I wanted to name our cat "Spot" No one else thought that was funny! 

I also thought this name was cute- my cousins little girl, she must have been 4 at the time, named their cat...."Fraidy-Cat"

I just thought that was so ingenious, I loved it, and a 4 year old came up with it.


----------



## maddhatir

Kathi OD said:


> OK, so a little off topic, but DH and I are now empty nesters and planning our third childless trip in November.  While, I would not in a million years have traded the  child-rearing years and trips w/ the kids, I must say that your list just shows that people who do not have children can have a wonderful Disney experience without them.  Hope you don't mind that I've jotted down some of your favorite experiences and will be trying them out on our upcoming trip.



By all means! Jot away!!!!  

DH has told me he does not want to do Disney again for a long time!  I am the freak, he just tags along. But, I told him that even though I know he is not as excited as I am to be there, I want to thank him for making MY visits so special. 

I read him your post and I told him that someone actually wants to do what WE do while we are in Disney- How can you not like Disney?...people actually want to do what WE are doing!


----------



## HockeyKat

Liisa said:


> Well, now... what other thread was this.  Any thread throwing around the term hoo hoo is probably a pretty entertaining read!!!



Sorry I took a mini computer break and missed this... it is a WISH (weight loss) thread called DISappearing Peeps... feel free to check it out and join in!  It can be very entertaining at times, although it is definitely high volume.

And Kathi, it is definitely possible to have a great child-free WDW experience.  We very much enjoy our time there together.  It is a magical place no matter your age!


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## autumnl78

lol when the cat looses weight she can just start calling it dog or fish.  that will just add to the confusion and humor of the situation. lol.  

oh skinny minnie. hehehehe.  

honestly though i have these 2 little mini ty beanie baby things in my car, one is a crab one is a frog. the frog is named crab crab and the crab is named frog frog. dont ask me why its just what came to mind when someone asked me whats their names and why are they there.


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## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> I wanted to name our cat "Spot" No one else thought that was funny!
> 
> I also thought this name was cute- my cousins little girl, she must have been 4 at the time, named their cat...."Fraidy-Cat"
> 
> I just thought that was so ingenious, I loved it, and a 4 year old came up with it.



We grew up across the street from a big Italian family with 11  kids. 10 girls and 1 boy. Complete with a real Italian godfather. They had a cat that was named "Dog". It was funny hearing someone call "Dog" and this cat would come trotting to you.


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> I wanted to name our cat "Spot" No one else thought that was funny!
> 
> I also thought this name was cute- my cousins little girl, she must have been 4 at the time, named their cat...."Fraidy-Cat"
> 
> I just thought that was so ingenious, I loved it, and a 4 year old came up with it.



I'm going to have to tell my Dad that one - if Mouse ever gets a new cousin we may have the name pre-selected!


Off Topic - DH & I just saw "Secret Window" last night - WOW!  What an ending.  Neither of us saw that coming! 
 

I assume you've seen that one already?  If not I would say well worth adding to the Netflix queue.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> We grew up across the street from a big Italian family with 11  kids. 10 girls and 1 boy. Complete with a real Italian godfather. They had a cat that was named "Dog". It was funny hearing someone call "Dog" and this cat would come trotting to you.




OK- Do you want to hear some names of dogs that, when you hear them, you can certainly tell these people were NOT dog people! I swear, I am not sure WHY they even had dogs.....but the dog's names were......****y and Stupid! 

They were 2 of THEE meanest dogs you ever wanted to encounter. They were these little black dogs (not sure what kind, when you are little, they were just "mean dogs") that would chase us down the street when we were kids and riding our bikes. 

A lot of the time we would just avoid that end of the neighborhood!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Off Topic - DH & I just saw "Secret Window" last night - WOW!  What an ending.  Neither of us saw that coming!
> 
> 
> I assume you've seen that one already?  If not I would say well worth adding to the Netflix queue.



I have seen it before. It has been a while- I need to add that to my BB queue. ALONG WITH! Don Juan DeMarco! 

But you can tell Secret Window is SOOOOO Stephen King! It reminds me of his book (and I think it was a movie too) The Dark Half.


----------



## maddhatir

Who just LOVES the title of this article from the Philadelphia Magazine! 

We do not mess around here in Philadelphia! 

*"It's not the kids, It's the WORST parents ever"* 
ARTICLE


----------



## ArmandXG

Hi all,
I came across the title of your post and I'm loving it! I'll have to read all of it at a later time, but I did jump to the last page to see what the topic you are currently on, and I would like to jump in if ya don't mind. 
First, DH and I are in our mid 40's and childless. We still get asked if we have children. Actually, it's no longer "are you having...? to automatically assuming, "how many do you have?" It makes it hard for me to deny when I have a nephew who calls us Mom and Dad (LONG story). 
When asked why I don't have kids, my response is My biological clock is digital so I never heard the ticking. It gets a laugh and stops the follow-up questions. 
I AM the proud mother of two wonderful cats, Zoe Delen (pronounced De-Lynn) and Chloe Noell. I adopted Zoe first and my ditzy sister kept calling her Chloe. So of course when we adopted Chloe, I had to keep the name, guaranteeing my sis would get one of their names right 
I have this thing about giving all my "children" middle names. That way, they know they're in trouble when BOTH names are used!
Thanks for allowing me to add my two and a half cents


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## maddhatir

ArmandXG said:


> Hi all,
> I came across the title of your post and I'm loving it! I'll have to read all of it at a later time, but I did jump to the last page to see what the topic you are currently on, and I would like to jump in if ya don't mind.
> First, DH and I are in our mid 40's and childless. We still get asked if we have children. Actually, it's no longer "are you having...? to automatically assuming, "how many do you have?" It makes it hard for me to deny when I have a nephew who calls us Mom and Dad (LONG story).
> When asked why I don't have kids, my response is My biological clock is digital so I never heard the ticking. It gets a laugh and stops the follow-up questions.
> I AM the proud mother of two wonderful cats, Zoe Delen (pronounced De-Lynn) and Chloe Noell. I adopted Zoe first and my ditzy sister kept calling her Chloe. So of course when we adopted Chloe, I had to keep the name, guaranteeing my sis would get one of their names right
> I have this thing about giving all my "children" middle names. That way, they know they're in trouble when BOTH names are used!
> Thanks for allowing me to add my two and a half cents




Welcome Shaughn!!!! 

Zoe and Chloe- I love it! We can change topics on a dime 

You can put in your 2 cents anywhere, anytime you wish!

Let's see, we were on taxes, things that CF peeps like to do in Disney, pets, pet's names, I posted an "enlightening" article so things my do a 180- 

OMG- BACK TO TAXES- HEY! ALL OF YOU FROM SOUTH CAROLINA NEED TO BE CONTRIBUTING A WHOLE LOT MORE TO THE EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM IN YOUR STATE! You know what I am talking about!! WT% was that answer about the map!   

When I read your post, I reminded me of a conversation I had yesterday with a neighbor down the street. We never met, but she wanted to ask me first before she picked through my trash  It was bulk trash day-- lots of goodies to be had! 

Anyway- she started telling me about her 14 year old daughter and how she was so embarrased to be driven to school in her grandfathers little pick up truck. She wanted her mother to take grandmoms Lexus. So my neighbor said, I will teach her- that little "princess" will be taking the bus this year- she said the bus stops in 2 places in our neighborhood- she can walk to either one. And she wil have to just get up earlier if she wants her hair to look perfect! (good for mom!) 

So my reaction was- That's right! I KNOW exactly what you mean (meaning- I know kids are selfish little brats!) She said- "Oh, do you have kids?" anytime anyone asks me that- I get this horrified look on my face and quickly respond "NO!" (I really want to say- "what? are you FREAKIN'  crazy? For the love of god no way!" ) But the horrid look and the NO are just fine and they get it!


----------



## kennancat

ArmandXG said:


> When asked why I don't have kids, my response is My biological clock is digital so I never heard the ticking. It gets a laugh and stops the follow-up questions.


Love it; I'll have to write that one down! Welcome!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> I have seen it before. It has been a while- I need to add that to my BB queue. ALONG WITH! Don Juan DeMarco!
> 
> But you can tell Secret Window is SOOOOO Stephen King! It reminds me of his book (and I think it was a movie too) The Dark Half.



Oh - I love that one!  I list Don Juan DeMarco amongst my "comfort food" movies.  I can't seem to ever see it too many times!  In fact maybe I'll pop that in instead of watching the Red Sox tonight.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Oh - I love that one!  I list Don Juan DeMarco amongst my "comfort food" movies.  I can't seem to ever see it too many times!  In fact maybe I'll pop that in instead of watching the Red Sox tonight.



hmmmmm *weighing the options*  JD in Don Juan DeMarco or Baseballlllllll??? hmmmmm






 OK! No brainer!


----------



## Mrsjvb

I am one of those rare people who despise kids of all ages, temperaments and manners.  Hated my own childhood, and have no desire whatsoever to live vicariously through a mini me.  

Luckily, between my sisters in law( I have 5) and my own siblings, there are plenty of grandchildren to keep the 'rents happy.  

I have been lucky in that I haven't been subjected to friends, strangers or relatives  sticking their nose in where it doesn't  belong.   But if I were to be asked, I have always thought I'd use the response "I can't bear children" and leave the interpretation up to the listener....


----------



## maddhatir

Mrsjvb said:


> But if I were to be asked, I have always thought I'd use the response "I can't bear children" and leave the interpretation up to the listener....



GENUIS!!!!!!!!!!! I love it!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Looks like the board was quiet this weekend.  Everyone out having fun hopefully.

We just got back from a long weekend in Bar Harbor, Maine (Beautiful.  Scenery.  Wish you were here!)

I have 2 rants though....

First - We stay at a very "unplugged" bed and breakfast.  One morning as we sat having a nice breakfast, everyone chatting away over breakfast, this guy gets a call on his cell phone _& answers it_!!!  
Sitting right there at the common dining room table w/about 10 other people.  Can you say RUDE!  
 

The other thing that really got my goat were the parents "hiking" w/their kids all over the place.  Some areas in Acadia National Park have specific paths & dozens of signs saying STAY ON THE PATH.  In other words don't walk all over the rocks & plants growing next to it.  We saw a father take his 2 kids all over the place, & the little girl was picking flowers!  DUH!!!  
That just burns my britches - we go every year and I would like it to stay nice & still be there in another 10 or 20 years.  What kind of lesson is he teaching these kids?!?!?  
 

Other than just those few rude jerks, we had a fantastic time.  Got in some hiking & shopping and even knocked off about 1/2 dozen Christmas gifts!!!  (Yes I'm one of those sick-o early shoppers.)  Booked our trip for next year as we were checking out today, so I'm already reading up on trails and planning our next visit!


----------



## Hixski

We are leaving Friday early am for WDW and the DCL cruise.    

I really need a vacation right now. I have been so stressed about finding a new job since we were supposed to be laid off October 1. I came in Friday and they had already done the layoff and I was not one of the people. My job is safe for a few more years. 

My stress level has almost gone back to normal.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> We are leaving Friday early am for WDW and the DCL cruise.
> 
> I really need a vacation right now. I have been so stressed about finding a new job since we were supposed to be laid off October 1. I came in Friday and they had already done the layoff and I was not one of the people. My job is safe for a few more years.
> 
> My stress level has almost gone back to normal.




Yay for you Hix! Now you can really enjoy your vacation with no worries of being laid off!

I am sure we will have an "adios thread" for you over on the other side- But I will say it here too! 

ADIOS and have a WONDERFUL time!


----------



## bulah1

Sorry I haven't been on here in a while! 

I had a few fun tidbits to add about this past weekend.

At some point while celebrating MIL's birthday the prior weekend, I came down with nephew's disease of the moment.  This happens EVERY time that child is out with us, he is always sick.  Sneezing, caughing, and smearing his germs every which way.  So of course I have it now.  I thought I was going to die... I'm still not right, and it's been over a week now.  I'm still kind of dizzy from all the crud stopped up in my head, but it's trying to "evacuate" now... never pleasant.  But this weekend we decided to take MIL to the zoo to celebrate and teach her on her new Nikon digital cam.  

While there, it re-confims the reasons why I do not have any business having children.  OK, so you're at the zoo... there is a reason most of the animals have fences between you and them.  And you have to feel nothing but sorry for the poor animals that do not get the luxury of a fence.  For example... the free roaming geese.  How many children did I see chasing after geese, yelling and flailing?  I counted at least a dozen... on numerous occasions.  Now, I don't know if these geese are just immune, but the geese I went after as a child would tell you to $#&* off by chasing you right back and hissing and squaking.  Not these guys.  Have to tell you I was rooting for the geese to do so.  

Then there were the defenseless creatures... the butterfly exhibit.  God I wanted to unleash right there, but at least the caretakers of the exhibit were very good at watching the children here.  The children were crawling all over in the flowers and rocks (yes, they could have gotten hurt easily, and the parents just thought it was "cute") and seeking out the precious butterflies to "hold".  Yes, they got a hold of butterflies.  You can see the "war-torn" effects on many of them there, with tattered wings or such.  The caretakers were quick to get after the children, but obviously not always quick enough.  Then the parents seemed totally ticked that the people would stop the children in the first place, I couldn't believe it!!

Then there were the kids on leashes... gotta say that always makes me chuckle... but at least they aren't running rampant that way!

I got a doosey of an e-mail this morning.  Apparently my whole 1997 graduating class is seeking me out and going the route of old friends to find me.  They obviously aren't looking hard though, because I'm living at my parent's house (having moved back to take care of my ill mother) and am listed in the phone book! LOL.  But one friend contacted me, she and I had kind of fallen out of favor sort of.  I guess just not the closest friends because of some of the actions she'd taken (I don't take kindly to liars)... and she just really wants to see me.  Um... ok - perhaps.  The doosey was my best friend of many years (through Junior High and early High School) contacting me.  We had lost touch for many years, though not by my attempts!  During high school in the last year or so we kind of were seperating already because she had become really involved with a boy in the school and his church.  After graduation I could barely find her.  And when I finally did and e-mailed her, the responses were almost "holier than thou" and judgemental.  OK, so I let it slide, she used to be my BEST friend!  More dropping off the face of the earth... and come a year or two later, I get an invite in the mail (after having moved two or three times, she somehow found my address, probably my parents gave it to her) for her wedding.  Not to be in it... but ok, that's cool - she has new people in her life - totally understandable.  So I went.  It was weird... she barely saw me.   Understandable again - I wasn't in her party so it's not like I could be by her all day to visit.  But what time we did spend seemed "obligated" and just generally "off".  Not the same girl I knew.  Now I know we all change, but all people that know me say I'm pretty much the same person I was then, just more dedicated.  She seemed like a different person.  So after that when I was planning my wedding details, I wrote her a letter (as I did for all the girls I asked) to be my bridesmaid.  I got a call about a month or so later, asking me what the exact date was (and I quote) "so I can pencil it in".  OK, I think that was the end for me.  Because if she was still a friend, you don't "pencil someone in" or even consider using that term.  It sounded so derogatory.  After her wedding I have not even seen her - and that short phone conversation was the last I've spoken to her (and that was in 2001 I believe).  I stopped contacting her because at that point she told me she and hubby (who coincedentally is also the boy she fringed out with from me in highschool for all things "church") were going to a missionary in Costa Rica indefinitely.  OK fine.  I didn't know what became of them after that, and honestly I didn't seek her out because of how she had made me feel that last time.  

So I got an e-mail from her this morning explaining how everyone is looking for me so she thought she'd try.  OK, so where the hell has SHE been all this time?  And goes on to tell me how they have a toddler now... (so I'm sure that will have changed her further, for the better I have yet to discover).  This sounds so terrible of me, but I've been hurt by her.  Now I'm just trying to figure out if I should just be cordial and try to rekindle a friendship, or what.  I am at a loss.  I am not sure I want to burn that bridge either because she has connections to a business through family that I am desperately trying to be part of and could possibly get a break that way.  Not that I would ever want to use someone for that or like that, but it's still there floating in the back of my head - and I know that is so evil of me to think.  Like if I break the connection for good, there will never be that possibility.  And just the thought that things will never be like they were.  But then again, maybe she is different and someone I would be friends with at this point in my life - just try it.  I just don't want to be hurt again.  There's so much more than can fit on this page... but just trying to convey what I'm feeling, and hopefully see if someone might have some words of advice.

Sorry for such a long vent! Talk to ya'll later!


----------



## maddhatir

bulah1 said:


> I got a doosey of an e-mail this morning.  Apparently my whole 1997 graduating class is seeking me out and going the route of old friends to find me.



I am just a bit confused-- are they looking for you for a class reunion??

In your friend's e-mail, does she say she would like to get together, or was it just a, hi, how have you been kind of e-mail.


----------



## zima-cheryl

bulah1 said:


> But then again, maybe she is different and someone I would be friends with at this point in my life - just try it.



I'd say you have it right there..."just try it"

If you go in knowing your lives have taken different paths & you won't go back to the high-school best friends type of relationship, who knows what could happen?  You could touch base once and it may end there, you could end up re-connecting w/someone from high school who becomes an acquaintance, casual friend, or possibly even a good friend.  

I'd say better to try & walk away if you are uncomfortable w/the situation than to not at least be open to the possibilities.  

Good luck!  I hope it works out & the 2 of you can get together & have some laughs reminiscing over your HS days.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Hixski said:


> I came in Friday and they had already done the layoff and I was not one of the people. My job is safe for a few more years.



Congrats - although sometimes I think it is as tough surviving as being laid off.  The feeling of guilty relief at not getting the pink slip plus the time it takes to mentally wind down from waiting for them to "rip off the band aid" so to speak.

Enjoy your vacation & hopefully your stress levels will be way down by the time you are back.


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## kennancat

bulah1 said:


> The doosey was my best friend of many years (through Junior High and early High School) contacting me.  <snip>  Now I'm just trying to figure out if I should just be cordial and try to rekindle a friendship, or what.


Personally, I'd probably be friendly, but also be really, really busy. My first thought on reading your post, especially when you commented on how much she changed from when you were best friends, is that this woman doesn't miss you - she misses the person she used to be at that time and is hoping to find that feeling again. I'd say to trust your instinct on this one. If you feel like you have it in you to risk being disappointed in her, go for it. If not, I think it's best to try to keep your distance.


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## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Yay for you Hix! Now you can really enjoy your vacation with no worries of being laid off!
> 
> I am sure we will have an "adios thread" for you over on the other side- But I will say it here too!
> 
> ADIOS and have a WONDERFUL time!





zima-cheryl said:


> Congrats - although sometimes I think it is as tough surviving as being laid off.  The feeling of guilty relief at not getting the pink slip plus the time it takes to mentally wind down from waiting for them to "rip off the band aid" so to speak.
> 
> Enjoy your vacation & hopefully your stress levels will be way down by the time you are back.




Thanks!!! I am going to have so many adult beverages this next week!!!!! That should make my stress level go back to normal.


----------



## bulah1

maddhatir said:


> I am just a bit confused-- are they looking for you for a class reunion??
> 
> In your friend's e-mail, does she say she would like to get together, or was it just a, hi, how have you been kind of e-mail.



Sorry, I thought I threw in there that it was for our 10 year reunion.  Didn't mean to confuse!  

She did say at the end of her message that she wanted to get together.  I guess she's only here for four months before she goes back to Costa Rica for her mission work with her hubby and is staying with friends.  There was a hi -how are you 'ness' about the whole e-mail... but honestly I can't feel out the truthfullness behind it because I'm jaded about the whole relationship to begin with.     I don't want to be a bad person, so I guess I need to get over the past and move on.  I'm just so afraid of being hurt again.  Ugh.



zima-cheryl said:


> I'd say you have it right there..."just try it"
> 
> If you go in knowing your lives have taken different paths & you won't go back to the high-school best friends type of relationship, who knows what could happen?  You could touch base once and it may end there, you could end up re-connecting w/someone from high school who becomes an acquaintance, casual friend, or possibly even a good friend.
> 
> I'd say better to try & walk away if you are uncomfortable w/the situation than to not at least be open to the possibilities.
> 
> Good luck!  I hope it works out & the 2 of you can get together & have some laughs reminiscing over your HS days.



Thanks so much for the kind advice.  I think you're so right, I guess I just needed to hear it.  I guess I just keep holding the past few experiences which have been so drawn across the past several years... and I've labeled her now which is terrible.  I've got this mindset as "this is how it will be because that is how it was"... You're right that I'll never know unless I give the experience the benefit of the doubt and just do it.  



kennancat said:


> Personally, I'd probably be friendly, but also be really, really busy. My first thought on reading your post, especially when you commented on how much she changed from when you were best friends, is that this woman doesn't miss you - she misses the person she used to be at that time and is hoping to find that feeling again. I'd say to trust your instinct on this one. If you feel like you have it in you to risk being disappointed in her, go for it. If not, I think it's best to try to keep your distance.



LOL - I MISS the person she used to be too!  You may be right there, she may be digging back in her life now that she does have a kid and thinking back on to what she used to have.  I hope she still has some of that sparkle left in her.  I miss that so much about her.  I like to think I still have mine too.  

Thanks everyone for taking the time to respond!!  I'll be giving her a call in the next day or so.  I'll let you know how it goes.     Thanks for the support!


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## KirklandTutu

I just had a Disney dream...

DH and I are planning to go drinking around the world in February. I dreamed that we started in Canada and and stayed there from 11am-3:30pm.  Then we had to rush around to get all the other drinks from the world.  At least I dreamed that the food was really really good...except the food seemed like it was from the french pavillion.

This is what reading the DisBoards does to you.


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## kennancat

bulah1 said:


> She did say at the end of her message that she wanted to get together.  I guess she's only here for four months before she goes back to Costa Rica for her mission work with her hubby and is staying with friends.


Okay, I originally gave my advice thinking this was someone who lived in the same area as you did. If she's only there temporarily, I'd definitely say to give her a call and see how things turn out. Chances are it's only going to be a casual, getting together for a lunch a couple of times thing anyway, especially if she's got a toddler to run after. Good luck!


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## kennancat

KirklandTutu said:


> I just had a Disney dream...


I once had a dream that I was being chased by kids on heelies... way too much time on the boards to get that one


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## Mischa

KirklandTutu said:


> I just had a Disney dream...
> 
> DH and I are planning to go drinking around the world in February. I dreamed that we started in Canada and and stayed there from 11am-3:30pm.  Then we had to rush around to get all the other drinks from the world.  At least I dreamed that the food was really really good...except the food seemed like it was from the french pavillion.
> 
> This is what reading the DisBoards does to you.



I usually lurk on this thread because although DH & I are married and have no kids it's not what we choose.  Anyway, I'm learning to live with that.  

But I had to comment on this dream...I've had similar dreams, except we stayed in Italy way too long and all the food tasted like it was from Germany.     This dream usually comes to me when I've had too much wine!   

Thanks for the laugh - I so needed it today!


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## FortWildernessLoopy

My DH and I reply that we can't have kids, the cat is allergic. 

We love going to WDW and DCL without children.  You get to set your own schedule, ride whatever you like, dine in any restaurant and lets face it...its WAY cheaper .


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## maddhatir

FortWildernessLoopy said:


> My DH and I reply that we can't have kids, the cat is allergic.



HA! I love that one- and I can't _bear_ children!


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## roselark

FortWildernessLoopy said:


> My DH and I reply that we can't have kids, the cat is allergic.



I LOVE it!!!! That will be the new phrase for my DH and I. Luckily our families have learned not to bug us anymore, so it is typically strangers that ask..


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## Mischa

FortWildernessLoopy said:


> My DH and I reply that we can't have kids, the cat is allergic.
> 
> We love going to WDW and DCL without children.  You get to set your own schedule, ride whatever you like, dine in any restaurant and lets face it...its WAY cheaper .



That is the funniest line!  I love it!  and it is definitely better going to WDW withOUT kids!


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## FortWildernessLoopy

I agree 1000%!  My DH have tomorrow off so we're headed over to Fort Wilderness and then going to roam around the "world".  Lunch somewhere on the Boardwalk and of course roaming over to our favorite resorts.  We could never do all that with kids in tow.


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## jumoo044

Hi everyone!  I've been reading this thread for a long time, but I haven't posted until now.  My hubby and I have been married for 19 years and have no kids.  We didn't plan not to have kids, it just never happened for us...and we're okay with that.  Besides, with the state the world is in, I'm not so sure bringing more people into it is such a good thing.  We have 2 cats, Cleo and Simon, and 2 basset hounds, Max and Molly.  Oh, and we love Disney World!  I'm glad I'm not alone, coz sometimes it seems like EVERYONE has kids!


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## PrincessKitty1

jumoo044 said:


> Hi everyone!  I've been reading this thread for a long time, but I haven't posted until now.  My hubby and I have been married for 19 years and have no kids.  We didn't plan not to have kids, it just never happened for us...and we're okay with that.  Besides, with the state the world is in, I'm not so sure bringing more people into it is such a good thing.  We have 2 cats, Cleo and Simon, and 2 basset hounds, Max and Molly.  Oh, and we love Disney World!  I'm glad I'm not alone, coz sometimes it seems like EVERYONE has kids!



Welcome to our thread! As I've posted before, I really think childless-not-by-choice folks and us childfree people often have a lot in common--we have similar life experiences and similar reactions from the rest of society.


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## maddhatir

jumoo044 said:


> Hi everyone!  I've been reading this thread for a long time, but I haven't posted until now.  My hubby and I have been married for 19 years and have no kids.  We didn't plan not to have kids, it just never happened for us...and we're okay with that.  Besides, with the state the world is in, I'm not so sure bringing more people into it is such a good thing.  We have 2 cats, Cleo and Simon, and 2 basset hounds, Max and Molly.  Oh, and we love Disney World!  I'm glad I'm not alone, coz sometimes it seems like EVERYONE has kids!



Welcome!! 

I have a little "kid story" that happened to me on Thursday. 

DH and I went to a baseball game with a bunch of friends. We were in a suite and had seats right outside of the suite. My cousin has 2 boys, one 7  and the other 4. Well they had 2 friends with them. I walked inside to talk to my cousin. The 4 boys were in the suite wrestling around, screaming, you know, boy stuff. Very loud and crazy- I could feel my anxiety rising 

She (my cousin) hates when they wrestle but their father does not mind it. My cousin screams, "OK! knock it off!" Her older son says, "but dad said we can wrestle" and I just said the first thing I thought of and SCREAMED....."well, your father isn' here!" My cousin just stopped and looked at me and we busted out laughing and I said......well isn't that what YOU are supposed to say? I hear moms saying that all the time 

Well, the kids not care, of course what mom said, so her next plan of action, she yelled out that I (me) was going to take out my tazer gun! - the boys did not stop b/c they were scared, they stopped b/c they thought it would be cool The one kid said to me "I KNEW it! You are a cop aren't you!" All amazed.

Of course I am not, but I told their little friend I was


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## jumoo044

Thanks for the warm welcome!  Some of you guys' stories are hilarious!  The other day, on the radio, they were talking to a caller who was celebrating his 25th anniversary.  The dj asked him what his secret was, to be happily married for 25 years, and the guy said, "We never had children!"


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## Liisa

Hi all!

Just got back this past weekend from WDW.  We had a great time.  We saw La Nouba for the first time... what a show!  The bummer of the trip (and my own fault), I only have one Disney pin - for the Wilderness Lodge (and only because that was our first DVC property).  I pinned it on my mini-backpack and the darn thing came off on our second day.  As we were staying at the Boardwalk, I was never able to get back to DTD or Wilderness Lodge to replace it.  When I got home, I did a search on-line only to discover that particular pin was retired.  DOH!     Of course, after I lost the pin, I found these great locking backs that can be used for the pins.  Ugh!  I bought the locking backs so at some point, when I get a new WL pin, I'll make sure it doesn't go anywhere.  

Other than that, we had a great time!


----------



## maddhatir

You know- the back fall off of every stinking pin I get from Disney!

Instead of making us buy the darn locking backs- why don't they just PUT the locking back on all the pins to start with!!!!!! UGH!

I know why-- cha-ching!


----------



## Hixski

Hi everyone, we just got back on Sunday from WDW and the DCL cruise. We had a fabulous time. I am just now getting back on reality time instead of vacation time.  

I don't really have any good kiddo meltdown stories. Most of the time on the cruise we spent in the lovely adult areas. We of course had to have the one guy in a speedo for our viewing pleasure at the adult pool. He would lay on his stomach to show off his butt, then would turn over and have to adjust his "package" for all of us. Pretty tame for the most part. Oh well, back to reality and back to the grind. I think post vacation depression is setting in.


----------



## aclov

I got back almost two weeks ago from Saratoga Springs for 4 nights, and I'm still not back to reality!       My best friend and her sister in law came with me and we had such a nice time.      Wish I was planning another trip soon


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## maddhatir

Welcome back girls!!!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Well, I get back from Disneyworld, and what do I see but folks chatting about getting back from Disney!     

We just got back from a long weekend (3 nights) at the Epcot Food and Wine Festival.  Excuse me, but can I please just LIVE at Epcot, maybe on the 2nd floor over the Twinings shop in the UK, so I can hear the British Invasion whenever I want??  

This is our 5th Food and Wine Festival, and it was leaps and bounds better than the previous years (though every year has been fabulous!).  I think there were about 10 more food booths this year, plus lots more entertainment (singers, dancers, mini-seminars).

I didn't see any kid meltdowns, but I did see a drunk adult go off on the poor CM behind the counter at the Dominican Republic booth (because the computers had just gone down and she couldn't process a credit card), to the point where I finally turned to the drunk and said, "You've had too much to drink."  She then went off on me (one of those every-other-word-is-the-f-word kind of rants) and as I walked away, a cast member was telling her she needed to leave the park and that they were calling security. (If that was anybody on this board, let me remind you that beer doesn't mix with your meds!  ).

Anyway, we had a GREAT time and we will also be going back for the last weekend of the festival (already have reservations), plus maybe one more weekend in between.


----------



## Liisa

PrincessKitty1,

I'm jealous.  I've been wanting to hit WDW during the Food & Wine Festival.  I thought maybe we'd do it next year.  Our Spring trip is to Mexico, so I figured I was safe banking on our Fall trip being back to Disney.  But then hubby (in good company with Madd's DH) asked me very nicely if we could try one of the "other" DVC properties - huh, there are OTHER DVC properties???  and why would I go there?     So it looks like we'll be giving either Hilton Head or Vero Beach a whirl.  Honestly, since we'll have gone 5 times in twelve months by them time January comes around, I really can't complain. 

But please feel free to share Food & Wine stories.  I'd love to hear them.

Anyone been to both HH and VB?  Looks like I need to choose!   

Liisa


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## CurlyJo224

I was so glad to see a thread like this on a Disney board. 

My husband have been married just shy of a year and are childfree. We have various health problems that we just don't want passed on. I had a tubal ligation  several months before we were married, and all is well. 

Being newly married, we've gotten the usual questions, but fortunately the health reason usually stops the conversation. We have gotten a few of the "Well, there's always adoption!" comments. We just tell them that it's an option later, but it doesn't fit into our life now. We really don't plan on it, but it shuts people up. 

I did have one customer say, "So, when is the baby coming?" I gave her a blank look, smoothed down my shirt to show no baby belly TYVM, and said, "It's not. Why do you ask?" She felt bad about it, but she should have for such an assumption. 

On a happier note, DH and I are going to WDW from October 27 to November 1 for our first anniversary. We honeymooned there last  year, and we had a blast at the MNSSHP (did I get all the right letters in there?) and the Food and Wine Festival.  It was my fourth trip, and DH's first. This year ought to be fun.

Only 26 more  days!


----------



## fakereadhed

CurlyJo224 said:


> one customer say, "So, when is the baby coming?" I gave her a blank look, smoothed down my shirt to show no baby belly TYVM, and said, "It's not. Why do you ask?"



Good for you!  Nobody should ask any woman that question. EVER. I really applaud you for returning the question back to it's rude owner and letting them face the music. Too many people let things like that bother them instead of teaching the other person what an uncomfortable question they have asked. Bet that person won't make that mistake again!


----------



## kennancat

Liisa said:


> Anyone been to both HH and VB?  Looks like I need to choose!
> 
> Liisa


DH and I have stayed at both DVC properties. I liked the Vero one better personally, although I grew up in Vero, so I'm a bit biased  It was convenient that the resort was right there on the beach (at HH you have to take the shuttle or drive out to the beach house, in case you hadn't read that yet) and the pool was a bit nicer. The architecture felt brighter to me and you have a full-service restaurant at the resort as an option. Being so used to visiting WDW, HH felt a little weird to me because it's right there in the middle of several other resorts. I'm used to feeling more encapsulated in Disney-ness, which I think Vero does better than HH. DH points out that there is more to do in HH (golf, shopping, nearby towns) and a wider selection of good restaurants, so there's the unbiased part of the review  So, if you're looking for a more laid-back vacation, I'd suggest Vero, if you want more activity, go with HH.


----------



## kennancat

BTW, I saw this story on one of the other CF boards that I lurk on, and decided to repost since it was Disney-related. I'm removing the names though (since I'm not sure about the "netiquette" of doing this).


> Funny Story: [Wife] and I were at Walt Disney World, having supper in the 50's Prime Time Café. We struck up a conversation with a family at the table next to us. Eventually the conversation went something like this:
> 
> MOM FROM OTHER TABLE: Y'all newlyweds?
> 
> ME: No, we've been married 7 years.
> 
> MOM: Y'all hire a babysitter for your kids?
> 
> ME: No, we don't have kids.
> 
> MOM: Oh, you left them at home with their grandparents.
> 
> ME: No, we don't have kids.
> 
> MOM: *crickets chirping*
> 
> ...and the conversation came to an abrupt end right there!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Hixski said:


> Hi everyone, we just got back on Sunday from WDW and the DCL cruise. We had a fabulous time.



Oooh, I want to pick your brain about cruising!  Beleive it or not, I've never cruised.  I'm afraid I would be bored and claustrophobic.  I'm not a pool person at all and I'm afraid I wouldn't have enough to do and would be pulling out my hair!  When I go on vacations I generally like to go, go, go (that's whay I like WDW so much--there's so much to do).

So, what do you think??

I'm glad to hear you enjoyed your cruise....sounds like you would recommend DCL to other childfreers!  I read that all the decks have high plastic shields around them.....do you really get the outdoorsy feeling from being out on deck and on your cabin balcony, or are the high plastic walls annoying? I am so curious.  I would love to just go aboard a ship and see what it's like.


----------



## FortWildernessLoopy

PrincessKitty1 said:


> Oooh, I want to pick your brain about cruising!  Beleive it or not, I've never cruised.  I'm afraid I would be bored and claustrophobic.  I'm not a pool person at all and I'm afraid I wouldn't have enough to do and would be pulling out my hair!  When I go on vacations I generally like to go, go, go (that's whay I like WDW so much--there's so much to do).
> 
> So, what do you think??
> 
> I'm glad to hear you enjoyed your cruise....sounds like you would recommend DCL to other childfreers!  I read that all the decks have high plastic shields around them.....do you really get the outdoorsy feeling from being out on deck and on your cabin balcony, or are the high plastic walls annoying? I am so curious.  I would love to just go aboard a ship and see what it's like.




I've taken 4 DCL cruises and I have no children.  I LOVE DCL!! The ships are gorgeous and there are so many adult only areas not to mention child only areas that you hardly ever even see them.  In fact, if you are adults travelling with only other adults and opt for the 2nd dining, you will (more than likely) be in a dining rotation without children!

You won't be bored...they won't let you.  There's so much to do that boredom is never an option,,,they're Disney.  BTW, the plastic walls are not een close to annoying and the plexi on the railing isn't even noticeable.  If you want to get really in depth on all things DCL, may I suggest cruisecritic.com?  There is a whole section with nothing but Disney cruisers .


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## aclov

DH and I have no children and went on the DCL in 2006.    He had never cruised before, I had went on a Royal Caribbean cruise with a friend and her family.     We didn't even go to the pool which we love doing, but didn't find the time.   I would also recommend the 2nd seating, most of the kids there were older.    We sat with a couple a little younger than us who had a very well-behaved one year.    This little boy was the cutest thing!   My DH and I looked forward to seeing him every evening.   There is plenty to do and the ports take up alot of time too.      I'm not sure if I would do another Disney Cruise, not that I didn't enjoy it but comparing it to RCL I would do maybe Carnival or another Royal Caribbean.    

I thought the food was good but not as fancy as maybe other cruise lines.

Castaway Cay is really nice except for the little bugs on the beach.   Yuck!  But they have a great adult only area.


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## Liisa

Since it's related to the CF topic, I thought some of you might be interested in this article.... 

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21115130/wid/11915773?GT1=10514

Looks like articles on people who choose a childfree life are definitely increasing.


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## raven69david

Just saw this post and thought i'd put my 2 cents in. I'm glad everyone without kids that doesn't want them is happy. I've been trying to understand how a person would not want kids, but haven't even begun to scratch the surface as to how this could be. I guess i'd never understand as there's no way my wife and I would feel complete without children. We only have 1 DD which is 2 and she is the best thing God has ever created. Such happiness and joy she brings to our lives that i could not imagine life without her. My wife and I met in 94, got married in 98 and had our daugher in '04. We did it cuz we knew we were ready for the responsibility. The OP's notion of "that's to be expected" is a big old load of BS. Kids are a product of love between two people. You don't have to have a child to love one another, but if you decide to have a child(ren), others shouldn't try to cop-out by saying "they were expected to have children and they are now trapped" or phrases to that effect by couples who don't want children. 

Religions believe that having children should be expected of 2 people. I say it's up to the 2 people if this is what they want. If they don't, fine. But ultimately, they make their decision as a couple. We make our decisions as a family and it feels terrific. I want to say that i feel sad for anyone who deprives themselves of such a wonderful miracle, but if they never have it, they'll never miss it. Best of Luck to everyone. Hope to meet you all someday on our upcoming and future trips.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

CurlyJo224 said:


> I did have one customer say, "So, when is the baby coming?" I gave her a blank look, smoothed down my shirt to show no baby belly TYVM, and said, "It's not. Why do you ask?" She felt bad about it, but she should have for such an assumption.



My friend has been asked this so many times... And I have to say, that I'm a big girl and I have never been asked so I can't even imagine why when looking at my friend who is not skinny, but definitely skinnier than me that they would assume she is pregnant. That is such a horrible question to just ask a stranger at random. I know they are trying to be friendly, but my feelings are, unless you know for a fact this person is having a baby, best to keep quiet and don't ask...


----------



## Shyvioletisme

raven69david said:


> Just saw this post and thought i'd put my 2 cents in. I'm glad everyone without kids that doesn't want them is happy. I've been trying to understand how a person would not want kids, but haven't even begun to scratch the surface as to how this could be. I guess i'd never understand as there's no way my wife and I would feel complete without children. We only have 1 DD which is 2 and she is the best thing God has ever created. Such happiness and joy she brings to our lives that i could not imagine life without her. My wife and I met in 94, got married in 98 and had our daugher in '04. We did it cuz we knew we were ready for the responsibility. The OP's notion of "that's to be expected" is a big old load of BS. Kids are a product of love between two people. You don't have to have a child to love one another, but if you decide to have a child(ren), others shouldn't try to cop-out by saying "they were expected to have children and they are now trapped" or phrases to that effect by couples who don't want children.
> 
> Religions believe that having children should be expected of 2 people. I say it's up to the 2 people if this is what they want. If they don't, fine. But ultimately, they make their decision as a couple. We make our decisions as a family and it feels terrific. I want to say that i feel sad for anyone who deprives themselves of such a wonderful miracle, but if they never have it, they'll never miss it. Best of Luck to everyone. Hope to meet you all someday on our upcoming and future trips.



Nice to hear your opinion, I'd also like to add that where I come from the "it's to be expected" in reference to having kids is not BS. it is so true...I know SOO Many people who do not like kids, never wanted kids, but got married, still didn't want kids, but basically had them because everyone expected them to. Horrible situation, but it happens A LOT! BTW, I don't feel like not having a child deprives me of anything. I and my husband are completely whole as people and as a couple without children. I fee like my life is completely fulfilling and wonderful without children and feel that would not be the case were I to have them. 
Don't want to come off as rude or anything, just putting in my thoughts to  your post...Once again. Thanks for sharing your opinion!


----------



## kennancat

Liisa said:


> Since it's related to the CF topic, I thought some of you might be interested in this article....
> 
> http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21115130/wid/11915773?GT1=10514
> 
> Looks like articles on people who choose a childfree life are definitely increasing.


Interesting article - also kind of interesting to go read the comments that people have left. Vast majority of people say "good for him", but you do have the "oh, he's so selfish" ones too. There's definitely a full bingo card there. I love the person who pointed out that it's kind of hypocritical to call someone selfish and then point out that there'll be no one to take care of them when they're old  What makes it clear to me that some people really just don't get it is the number of the negative posts that criticize the guy for having a vasectomy now and ask what happens if he falls in love with and wants to marry a woman who wants kids. Get a clue people - a woman who wants kids won't be the woman of his dreams because she won't share the same values and goals as he does.


----------



## kennancat

raven69david said:


> Just saw this post and thought i'd put my 2 cents in. I'm glad everyone without kids that doesn't want them is happy. I've been trying to understand how a person would not want kids, but haven't even begun to scratch the surface as to how this could be. I guess i'd never understand as there's no way my wife and I would feel complete without children. We only have 1 DD which is 2 and she is the best thing God has ever created. Such happiness and joy she brings to our lives that i could not imagine life without her. My wife and I met in 94, got married in 98 and had our daugher in '04. We did it cuz we knew we were ready for the responsibility. The OP's notion of "that's to be expected" is a big old load of BS. Kids are a product of love between two people. You don't have to have a child to love one another, but if you decide to have a child(ren), others shouldn't try to cop-out by saying "they were expected to have children and they are now trapped" or phrases to that effect by couples who don't want children.
> 
> Religions believe that having children should be expected of 2 people. I say it's up to the 2 people if this is what they want. If they don't, fine. But ultimately, they make their decision as a couple. We make our decisions as a family and it feels terrific. I want to say that i feel sad for anyone who deprives themselves of such a wonderful miracle, but if they never have it, they'll never miss it. Best of Luck to everyone. Hope to meet you all someday on our upcoming and future trips.


I don't think it's important that you understand how a person could not want kids - it's important that you understand that some people don't and feeling that way doesn't make them bad, it just makes them different from you.

BTW, something that I've never come out and specifically said, but that I think a lot of CF/FS(fence-sitters) would agree with is that I *WANT *people who do choose to have children to be happy with that decision. I don't want them to regret it and feel jealous of me for not making the same choices that I did. I feel so bad for people who make the choice to have children and then realize that they wish they hadn't. What an awful place to be, both for the child and the parent. I do believe the majority parents are glad they made the decision to have kids (I think biology and hormones help create those feelings to help survival of the species) but I do think there are people that had kids because it was expected and regret it. Check out that article mentioned above and some of the comments posted - people who automatically label any CF person as selfish or try to force them to have children out of fear ("who will take care of you when you're old", "you'll regret it one day") and then tell me that there's not pressure to have kids.


----------



## Hixski

PrincessKitty1 said:


> Oooh, I want to pick your brain about cruising!  Beleive it or not, I've never cruised.  I'm afraid I would be bored and claustrophobic.  I'm not a pool person at all and I'm afraid I wouldn't have enough to do and would be pulling out my hair!  When I go on vacations I generally like to go, go, go (that's whay I like WDW so much--there's so much to do).
> 
> So, what do you think??
> 
> I'm glad to hear you enjoyed your cruise....sounds like you would recommend DCL to other childfreers!  I read that all the decks have high plastic shields around them.....do you really get the outdoorsy feeling from being out on deck and on your cabin balcony, or are the high plastic walls annoying? I am so curious.  I would love to just go aboard a ship and see what it's like.




Everyone else pretty much answered your questions so I will just post a few pictures. Be careful, after seeing these you may want to go even more!!! 

Sunset from the boat.






A couple of pictures from St. Maarten.











Orient Beach on St. Maarten






St. Thomas










Pirate night. These were our servers.






Palo brunch - dessert table






Goofy up on deck.






This is the adult pool when we got on Saturday before anyone got in.






Castaway Cay.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Everyone else pretty much answered your questions so I will just post a few pictures. Be careful, after seeing these you may want to go even more!!!



Hey Hix!

Thanks for sharing this pics- Glad to hear you had a great time!


----------



## zima-cheryl

kennancat said:


> I don't think it's important that you understand how a person could not want kids - it's important that you understand that some people don't and feeling that way doesn't make them bad, it just makes them different from you.



I don't understand how some folks can be Yankees fans.   

I am still good friends w/them - I just don't understand.


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## Shyvioletisme

Hixski, great great pictures!!!


----------



## Markstudy

raven69david said:


> I've been trying to understand how a person would not want kids,
> 
> I guess i'd never understand as there's no way my wife and I would feel complete without children. .



Maybe I can help you understand  

I spent 25 years growing-up and being a kid (took a few extra years to finish college, after changing major)

Now I had a choice.... spend the next 25 years, doing the same thing I just did all over again
or try something new.

I guess I never thought I'd be complete without seeing the rest of the world.

PTA, School Bus, pee-wee baseball, shopping for back to school, drinking cool-aid, birthday party, learning to ride a bike, first kiss, skinned knee.... just sounds dull as dishwater... 
to do it all-over-agin? It was fun the first time around. Now for something new


















.


----------



## KirklandTutu

Markstudy said:


> Maybe I can help you understand
> 
> I spent 25 years growing-up and being a kid (took a few extra years to finish college, after changing major)
> 
> Now I had a choice.... spend the next 25 years, doing the same thing I just did all over again
> or try something new.
> 
> I guess I never thought I'd be complete without seeing the rest of the world.
> 
> PTA, School Bus, pee-wee baseball, shopping for back to school, drinking cool-aid, birthday party, learning to ride a bike, first kiss, skinned knee.... just sounds dull as dishwater...
> to do it all-over-agin? It was fun the first time around. Now for something new
> 
> 
> .




YES!
and to add.  I hated, as a kid, having parents.  I know, sounds strange, but from day one I never liked that dynamic.  I don't want to be a parent, just as I didn't want to be parented (I know, I just made up that word, but I think it gets the point across).  

Even if I were to want kids, I probably wouldn't because I know that I wouldn't be a good parent.  I'd be selfish and more the child the entire time.  Best to just say no than to be a bad parent.

I don't think that I'm missing out on anything not having kids.  I think I'd miss out on more if I had them.


----------



## PoohNTuck

Thanks to all who keep posting here.  DH and I are newlyweds (5 months) and constantly get baby related questions... we aren't ready and talk about possibly never being ready.  We want too many other things and don't think we'll ever be able to afford kids.  Maybe if we made $100,000/year and both stayed home full-time we'd feel different about raising kids.  We can't afford a house yet... how do people afford a house, kids, vacations... we aren't interested in a lifetime of debt and stress.

It's just hard to explain to people right now... lots of baby fever in the late 20s/early 30s age group...


----------



## FortWildernessLoopy

Here's a little quote I found from 
_The Shame of Not Wanting Children_,The Social Stigma of Leading a Ward-Free Life,by Carolyn Ray



> Currently, a popular view is that children are creatures who naturally demand sacrifice. Sacrifice is considered by many to be an intrinsic good. It is common for people to say, with an air of moralistic condescension, "What do you mean, children are too large an investment? You have to make some sacrifices in in life!" Perhaps it's true that some sacrifices have to be made in life. But why this sacrifice, in particular?
> 
> Many people are unable to imagine a person who is happy without children. There are some eccentric artists and philosophers who never had children, but of course they're oddballs. It is unthinkable that any of the nice people in one's social circle would intentionally go childless.
> 
> Even if they are vaguely aware that there are people with children who are not at all happy, still many people think that living without children increases the risk of unhappiness. This may be true for some people. But there is no good reason to think that it is true for all people, and plenty of reasons against thinking so.
> 
> I am convinced that there are many parents who never wanted children. They created them anyway because they didn't know how to stand up for what they really did want. Judging by the way many parents behave toward children, and by the things they comp lain about, it seems pretty clear that most people don't like children very much at all. They are bothered by a high percentage of the natural behavior of healthy children.
> 
> Some of these very people will try hard to convince others to have children too. Why would this happen? Some people genuinely believe that a happy life is not possible to the ward-free adult. But for others, I think defensiveness is part of the reas on for the inconsistency. Whether one voices any criticism of them or not, some people who have created children without really wanting them will consider someone else's decision not to live with children as an implied accusation of a lack of foresight. And others who are happy to live with children consider the decision to do otherwise as an assault on their values and their lifestyle. The rest of the cause can be attributed to unthinking conformity to established practice.



Now personally, I enjoyed my childhood, but I get along great with my parents now as an adult.  My DH and I are about to go on a cruise with my folks and aunt and uncle....right in the middle of the week, and during the school year, too.  We can go to Disney pretty much monthly and only go to see what _we_ want to.  We eat wherever _we_ like the food , no accomodations for chicken fingers and ranch dressing.  No getting babysitters or dealing with any of the drama of a spoilt child.  Instead of waiting for our golden years to finally have "alone time", my DH and I have it every, single day.

Its been said before, but is worth saying again...If you haven't done Disney without kids, you haven't _done_ Disney!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> I don't understand how some folks can be Yankees fans.
> 
> I am still good friends w/them - I just don't understand.




  OMG  Zima!!! I had to go back and check his post to see what reference he made about the Yankees!!!! 

Sorry- It's early!! Let me get more coffee in me and I will check back later!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

FortWildernessLoopy said:


> like the food , no accomodations for chicken fingers !



apparently you haven't met my husband who is a really picky eater and is a chicken finger/tender fanatic!! lol...But I get your point. Definitely a plus. Our anniversary is at the end of October, during the school year...We will always be able to just go somewhere for it without having to worry about babysitters or taking kids out of school. It is such a happy thought.


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> OMG  Zima!!! I had to go back and check his post to see what reference he made about the Yankees!!!!
> 
> Sorry- It's early!! Let me get more coffee in me and I will check back later!



Oh - there was no Yankee reference - I was just making a funny while making a point.
 

People make lots of decisions every day & we all don't agree on the same thing.  Honestly, having friends who are different is what makes life interesting.  

How boring if we all did the same thing, went the same places, ate the same types of food & enjoyed the same things.

So I'll take a few Yankee fans, and people w/out kids, and people who like lima beans, and republicans/democrats, cat/dog lovers, and so on ...because everyone can add something to my life or teach me something.

{Go Red Sox!}


----------



## kmmccart75

raven69david said:


> ...there's no way my wife and I would feel complete without children.



I think it is wonderful that you and your wife were able to recognize that you didn't feel complete without children, and then fill that vacancy, and now are happy.  My husband and I have felt complete from almost the moment we met, almost 10 years ago.  It is a true love affair with each other, and there is nothing missing for us.  I agree with the other poster who said that you don't need to understand this, just accept that some people are different from you, and we all have different contributions to make to this world. 



raven69david said:


> The OP's notion of "that's to be expected" is a big old load of BS. Kids are a product of love between two people. You don't have to have a child to love one another, but if you decide to have a child(ren), others shouldn't try to cop-out by saying "they were expected to have children and they are now trapped" or phrases to that effect by couples who don't want children.



This is not "a load of..."  I don't think anyone here is saying that EVERY parent feels trapped, they are pointing out that it is better to remain happily childfree than to have a child because you think it's what you have to do.  I have a close friend who didn't want kids, but had them for her husband and family, thought what everyone said was true that it would be different when they were her own, and now has admitted to me that she doesn't feel connected to them and if she could do it over again, wouldn't. 



raven69david said:


> I want to say that i feel sad for anyone who deprives themselves of such a wonderful miracle...



Don't feel sad for those who make such a personal choice and are happy with it.  It is much sadder to want a child and not be able to conceive, and just as sad to not want a child, and conceive anyway.  It is sad when a parent feels fulfilled by a child, and then feels like they missed out on their life when that child leaves (some couples even divorce after the children are grown because they don't feel like a couple anymore).  It is sad when a parent feels like they failed when their child grows up to be not so wonderful.  It is NOT sad when two people in love decide that they are not missing anything, that they have many talents and gifts to give the world that are just as important as children, and are enjoying a 'wonderful miracle' of their own - a life together.  So...don't feel sad for me!


----------



## aclov

Hixski & Markstudy -   Great pictures!   Gosh that water looks great! 

It all comes down to choices and what you (or if your married -  spouse or signaficant other )are in agreement with.     I have a friend who was dating a doctor and she did not want children.    He did, she didn't.   So they broke up. I really respect the fact that she was honest with him and didn't end up getting married and having children because that's what was expected or what HE wanted.    Some people might see that as selfish, but I see it as being a confident person.


----------



## FortWildernessLoopy

> Don't feel sad for those who make such a personal choice and are happy with it.  It is much sadder to want a child and not be able to conceive, and just as sad to not want a child, and conceive anyway.  It is sad when a parent feels fulfilled by a child, and then feels like they missed out on their life when that child leaves (some couples even divorce after the children are grown because they don't feel like a couple anymore).  It is sad when a parent feels like they failed when their child grows up to be not so wonderful.  It is NOT sad when two people in love decide that they are not missing anything, that they have many talents and gifts to give the world that are just as important as children, and are enjoying a 'wonderful miracle' of their own - a life together.  So...don't feel sad for me!



WOO HOO, DITTO!


----------



## Carol17

Im 35. Im single. No kids. I just dont see it ever happening. I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would ever want to marry me. This leaves me with the double whammy of questions of why Im single with no kids at my age. I never really felt the need to have kids. I stupidly started looking around face book for old classmates, and it saddened me to see all my old classmates with spouses, kids, pictures of happy,smiling families. Just reminded me of what I might be missing. Im starting to finally realize, wow, I have no family. If I get seriously ill, there is no one to take care of me. When I get emails from old classmates asking me "whats new?" I have nothing to say. Nothing. All I ever talk about is work. It is all I have.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Thanks Hixsi, aclov, and FtWildernessLoopy, for the cruise-related posts!

I guess I think of cruises as being stuck on a boat for 7 days. But after reading these posts, it sounds more like being in a floating hotel--that there are ports most every day where you get off and tour, right?

I am so afraid I would feel "stuck" and bored.  I love to eat, drink, and be merry but I am definitely a go-go-go kind of vacationer.  I like to have lots of choices of things to do.

Hixsi, those photos are just GORGEOUS. I know part of my anti-cruise feeling is that DH and I spent a long weekend in the Bahamas once and absolutely hated the way we were approached and treated by the people who lived there.  We did not like being approached constantly to buy stuff, have our hair braided, etc.  Please tell me there are ports in the Caribbean that aren't like that!


----------



## maddhatir

Carol17 said:


> Im 35. Im single. No kids. I just dont see it ever happening. I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would ever want to marry me. This leaves me with the double whammy of questions of why Im single with no kids at my age. I never really felt the need to have kids. I stupidly started looking around face book for old classmates, and it saddened me to see all my old classmates with spouses, kids, pictures of happy,smiling families. Just reminded me of what I might be missing. Im starting to finally realize, wow, I have no family. If I get seriously ill, there is no one to take care of me. When I get emails from old classmates asking me "whats new?" I have nothing to say. Nothing. All I ever talk about is work. It is all I have.



Boy- you are really down on yourself- Why would you think no one would want to marry you??

By the sounds of it- it DOES seem like if you met the right guy- you would probably want a family

All of us here are happy to be childfree- no regrets- no wishing this or that. 

Sorry to hear you are feeling this way. I do not think I would be able to give you any advise you might need.


----------



## maddhatir

Quick story- Me amd mom took a ride to our towns Fall Festival after doing some yardsaling yesterday.

Every year we say we are going and for some reason or another we never make it. So we made time. 

I told her while walking half way through REMIND ME! NEXT YEAR! IF I SAY I WANT TO GO TO THIS THING AGAIN....THAT I AM AN IDIOT!

There were screaming kids everywhere! 

I heard one kid screaming about a block down- well, the family finally approaches us and the girl is *still* screaming. I see she is in a stroller- she is about 3 or 4, and her brother keeps bopping her with some stupid "made this @ the Fall Festival" hat! Yes- when they made it up to us- the grandmother FINALLY says- "will you leave her alone!" and the kid stopped- WHY!? did I notice from a block away the kid was screaming but it took the family all that time to say something! 

I told mom- "this is an anxiety attack just WAITIN' to happen!" "GET ME THE %$#@ OUTTA HERE!"


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Carol17 said:


> Im 35. Im single. No kids. I just dont see it ever happening. I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would ever want to marry me. This leaves me with the double whammy of questions of why Im single with no kids at my age. I never really felt the need to have kids. I stupidly started looking around face book for old classmates, and it saddened me to see all my old classmates with spouses, kids, pictures of happy,smiling families. Just reminded me of what I might be missing. Im starting to finally realize, wow, I have no family. If I get seriously ill, there is no one to take care of me. When I get emails from old classmates asking me "whats new?" I have nothing to say. Nothing. All I ever talk about is work. It is all I have.



 Carol, you sound like you are feeling really down on yourself. I'm sorry you feel like nobody would want to marry you.  Dating is really, really hard (at least for me--I never liked dating but love being in a relationship!) but you probably need to put yourself out there and try to make some connections if you are feeling alone.  

If you love your work, that is a BIG positive in your life.


----------



## ChisJo

maddhatir said:


> Quick story- Me amd mom took a ride to our towns Fall Festival after doing some yardsaling yesterday.
> 
> Every year we say we are going and for some reason or another we never make it. So we made time.
> 
> I told her while walking half way through REMIND ME! NEXT YEAR! IF I SAY I WANT TO GO TO THIS THING AGAIN....THAT I AM AN IDIOT!
> 
> There were screaming kids everywhere!
> 
> I heard one kid screaming about a block down- well, the family finally approaches us and the girl is *still* screaming. I see she is in a stroller- she is about 3 or 4, and her brother keeps bopping her with some stupid "made this @ the Fall Festival" hat! Yes- when they made it up to us- the grandmother FINALLY says- "will you leave her alone!" and the kid stopped- WHY!? did I notice from a block away the kid was screaming but it took the family all that time to say something!
> 
> I told mom- "this is an anxiety attack just WAITIN' to happen!" "GET ME THE %$#@ OUTTA HERE!"



This reminds me of my day yesterday! I went out with my sis to this really nice little coffee house with relaxing music playing in the background. There were university students studying there. There were business people with there laptops there. It seemed so nice. My sister was away from her kids and it was so nice in there. Well, in comes 2 women with their kids in strollers....normally, I would have no problem with this if in a normal situation, the parents were COGNIZANT of the atmosphere in which they were entering. But no....oblivious. The kids were SCREAMING - and then they let them out of the strollers to, I don't know, run around and drive the other patrons crazy??? It's not like its a coffee house or anything and there isn't hot coffee on peoples tables that they can knock over and burn themselves on...or better yet, get on the laptops and ruin them. You could see the anxiety of the patrons in there....unbelievable. Seriously, they let them do this for about 20 min (a couple of minutes, ok...but 20?? Come on). Finally, one of the moms gets her kid and says to stop it....and they throw this huge temper tantrum!!! After 10 more minutes of screaming, they leave. We should have left long before then, but my sister just kept saying it had to stop sooner or later....Hate to see what those kids are like at home.


----------



## ChisJo

Carol17 said:


> Im 35. Im single. No kids. I just dont see it ever happening. I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would ever want to marry me. This leaves me with the double whammy of questions of why Im single with no kids at my age. I never really felt the need to have kids. I stupidly started looking around face book for old classmates, and it saddened me to see all my old classmates with spouses, kids, pictures of happy,smiling families. Just reminded me of what I might be missing. Im starting to finally realize, wow, I have no family. If I get seriously ill, there is no one to take care of me. When I get emails from old classmates asking me "whats new?" I have nothing to say. Nothing. All I ever talk about is work. It is all I have.



Oh Carol - I can completely understand how you feel. I felt the same way for so long. All my friends were getting married and having kids and all I had was work. I was so down on myself. But know that there are so many things that you can do that don't involve having a significant other or having kids. I joined a run team, got a personal trainer at the gym, and then I started volunteering at centres around my home. I met so many wonderful people, I felt healthy and I was probably at the best physical shape I had ever been. I travelled solo and saw the world. I stayed at hostels and now have friends from all over the world. I got my degree and now have a great career. I got closer with my family and friends. Don't be down....you don't need a significant other to fulfill your life. There is so much that you can do. And I have to agree with PrincessKitty, if you like your work, that's great, a huge positive!


----------



## Hixski

PrincessKitty1 said:


> Thanks Hixsi, aclov, and FtWildernessLoopy, for the cruise-related posts!
> 
> I guess I think of cruises as being stuck on a boat for 7 days. But after reading these posts, it sounds more like being in a floating hotel--that there are ports most every day where you get off and tour, right?
> 
> I am so afraid I would feel "stuck" and bored.  I love to eat, drink, and be merry but I am definitely a go-go-go kind of vacationer.  I like to have lots of choices of things to do.
> 
> Hixsi, those photos are just GORGEOUS. I know part of my anti-cruise feeling is that DH and I spent a long weekend in the Bahamas once and absolutely hated the way we were approached and treated by the people who lived there.  We did not like being approached constantly to buy stuff, have our hair braided, etc.  Please tell me there are ports in the Caribbean that aren't like that!



You still get people wanting to braid your hair and the like but they are not as aggressive. The sail and snorkel we did on St. Thomas was great. I have some great pictures of sea turtles, fish and a huge stingray but they were from our underwater camera. I still need to scan them into the computer. 

I think you would love a cruise once you got on there. It is like a floating hotel. More like a floating resort actually. 



maddhatir said:


> Quick story- Me amd mom took a ride to our towns Fall Festival after doing some yardsaling yesterday.
> 
> Every year we say we are going and for some reason or another we never make it. So we made time.
> 
> I told her while walking half way through REMIND ME! NEXT YEAR! IF I SAY I WANT TO GO TO THIS THING AGAIN....THAT I AM AN IDIOT!
> 
> There were screaming kids everywhere!
> 
> I heard one kid screaming about a block down- well, the family finally approaches us and the girl is *still* screaming. I see she is in a stroller- she is about 3 or 4, and her brother keeps bopping her with some stupid "made this @ the Fall Festival" hat! Yes- when they made it up to us- the grandmother FINALLY says- "will you leave her alone!" and the kid stopped- WHY!? did I notice from a block away the kid was screaming but it took the family all that time to say something!
> 
> I told mom- "this is an anxiety attack just WAITIN' to happen!" "GET ME THE %$#@ OUTTA HERE!"



We had a wedding to go to last night. The flower girl from our wedding was getting married. I am feeling soooo old. Big Italian family, 11 kids, 10 girls and 1 boy. As you can imagine all those kids have kids and some of them have kids. Big Italian weddings you do not leave the kids at home. We did not have alot of screaming but alot of running full tilt and 10 yr olds crawling on the floor playing some kind of tag. The dance floor was full of dancing, running, pushing and shoving kids. Funny thing is since I grew up with this family I can ignore most of it when I am around them.  

The funny thing that happened was this: The oldest girl of this bunch is now about 55 and has 9 kids of her own and 12 grandkids. We said "Hi" and chatted for a few minutes. She said "You never did have kids did you"? I said, "No, we never did". She said "Aren't you glad you never did"? I said "Yes, at this point in my life I am very glad". She said good for you. She said she can't wait to get all the kids out of the house. Her youngest is 16 and she is counting the days. She said she has never figured out why she had so many kids. She said it was just something everyone EXPECTED from her coming from a big family. 

So there again we have someone who had 9 kids  because everyone EXPECTED it. Funny how some see that too late in life.


----------



## kmmccart75

Carol17 said:


> Im 35. Im single. No kids. I just dont see it ever happening. I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would ever want to marry me. This leaves me with the double whammy of questions of why Im single with no kids at my age. I never really felt the need to have kids. I stupidly started looking around face book for old classmates, and it saddened me to see all my old classmates with spouses, kids, pictures of happy,smiling families. Just reminded me of what I might be missing. Im starting to finally realize, wow, I have no family. If I get seriously ill, there is no one to take care of me. When I get emails from old classmates asking me "whats new?" I have nothing to say. Nothing. All I ever talk about is work. It is all I have.



Carol17 - I am so sorry to hear you are having a rough time.  I didn't think I would get married until I met my husband - so you never know.  I believe there is someone out there for everyone who wants to find someone.

I've seen several threads on these boards for singles - maybe you could find some new friends and/or support on those threads?  Obviously, you are welcome here!  I just thought you might want to check some of those, too.  Here's a couple I saw, just on the first page:

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1575269
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1044270


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## luvthemouse71

Carol17, I have felt like you at times and I'm about your age. I've found the best way to deal with this is to not put your life on hold while you wait for Mr. Right to come into the picture. Do what some of the other posters have suggested-travel, find something that excites you. Also, if you DO want kids, in this day and age, no one says you have to be married. Lots of single women are either having biological children on their own or adopting. I would obviously make sure I had emotional support from other people besides a SO if I went this route(family, friends), and I would make sure I truly wanted a child as opposed to wanting to "keep up" with my former classmates. I wish you the best of luck-please don't be so down on yourself.


----------



## Carol17

Thanks for the kind words everyone. I was just having a bad-feeling sorry for myself- kind of day yesterday. I have a job, friends I care about, a roof over my head, and my health...I shouldn't complain. Not to mention, I'm going to WDW in December...things could be worse! LOL 









Hey...where is my dancing pumpkin? Hmmm...better try again.


----------



## aclov

Carol17 -  it's too to hear positive words coming from you! 

My brother is 32, single and actually still lives at home (downstairs from my parents).   My mother sometimes says that she feels sorry for him but I'm like WHY?!   He's probably better off than ALOT of people with marital problems or crazy kids or somekind of drama.    He gets to spend his money on himself, he helps my mom financially and doesn't have to answer to anyone.

And you are VERY lucky to be going to WDW, it's something you accomplished for yourself and you should be proud of that.


----------



## roselark

kmmccart75 said:


> I think it is wonderful that you and your wife were able to recognize that you didn't feel complete without children, and then fill that vacancy, and now are happy.  My husband and I have felt complete from almost the moment we met, almost 10 years ago.  It is a true love affair with each other, and there is nothing missing for us.  I agree with the other poster who said that you don't need to understand this, just accept that some people are different from you, and we all have different contributions to make to this world.
> 
> 
> 
> This is not "a load of..."  I don't think anyone here is saying that EVERY parent feels trapped, they are pointing out that it is better to remain happily childfree than to have a child because you think it's what you have to do.  I have a close friend who didn't want kids, but had them for her husband and family, thought what everyone said was true that it would be different when they were her own, and now has admitted to me that she doesn't feel connected to them and if she could do it over again, wouldn't.
> 
> 
> 
> Don't feel sad for those who make such a personal choice and are happy with it.  It is much sadder to want a child and not be able to conceive, and just as sad to not want a child, and conceive anyway.  It is sad when a parent feels fulfilled by a child, and then feels like they missed out on their life when that child leaves (some couples even divorce after the children are grown because they don't feel like a couple anymore).  It is sad when a parent feels like they failed when their child grows up to be not so wonderful.  It is NOT sad when two people in love decide that they are not missing anything, that they have many talents and gifts to give the world that are just as important as children, and are enjoying a 'wonderful miracle' of their own - a life together.  So...don't feel sad for me!



Very, very nicely said! 

My husband and I feel the same way. We just celebrated our 11th anniversary. I am 34, he is 35, and we are best friends and completely content with our lives. We don't want anything to change and do not need children in order to fell "more complete". 

There are lots of reasons why people choose not to have children. One of the biggest factors for both my DH and I was the fact that we grew up in abusive households. We have seen our siblings (except for Dh's brother) repeat the cycle of abuse. We have done the best we can both for the children as well as our siblings, but through our experiences, we decided that we would not even take the chance of repeating it ourselves. We didn't really want children anyway, but this really reinforces that decision.


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## kmmccart75

FortWildernessLoopy said:


> WOO HOO, DITTO!





roselark said:


> Very, very nicely said!
> 
> My husband and I feel the same way. We just celebrated our 11th anniversary. I am 34, he is 35, and we are best friends and completely content with our lives. We don't want anything to change and do not need children in order to fell "more complete".



Thanks so much, both of you, for the feedback.  I've been lurking here for a while, and finally decided to chime in.  I just couldn't let someone 'feel sad' for me, when I am so completely happy for myself!  

I was so relieved to see this thread on the DIS, too.  I love Disney and don't think it's just for kids - after all, there's five star dining, a wine festival, a wonderful spa, etc., etc.  And, I love being a big kid at heart and enjoying all the rest of the magic Disney has to offer.  I also find it to be a very romantic place to enjoy with my husband.  Well, at least when I'm not surrounded by 'melt-downs' as I've seen mentioned here...


----------



## FortWildernessLoopy

Hixski said:


> Pirate night. These were our servers.



OK, this is going to be a weird question, but was one of your servers named "Romeo"?  I ask because we had Romeo when he was first training and just loved him.  The picture looks so much like him.  I want to say he was from the Phillipines, but I just can't remember.


----------



## Hixski

FortWildernessLoopy said:


> OK, this is going to be a weird question, but was one of your servers named "Romeo"?  I ask because we had Romeo when he was first training and just loved him.  The picture looks so much like him.  I want to say he was from the Phillipines, but I just can't remember.



Good eyes!!!! That is Romeo in the midddle. He was excellent. We am going to try to ask for him the next time we go. He said he will still be there for a few more years.


----------



## zima-cheryl

I get an e-mail every week from Air Fare Watch Dog.  This week's question is "Should there be a separate seating area on planes for families with babies and young children?"

I found some of the answers quite funny.  Others were interesting too...in a scary, sad sort of way.  

http://www.airfarewatchdog.com/Airf...leType/ArticleView/articleId/488/Default.aspx

Personally I find a nice strong mojito & I'm out for an hour or two.  I've slept from Hartford to Orlando on an early plane full of screaming, tired kids.


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## Hixski

I was just reading our weekend paper and found this. It was in the advice column of "ASK AMY". I thought everyone might get a kick out of it. 

_*Dear Amy:*  My wife and I do not have children. We do have many friends who have children. We enjoy visiting most of our friends (and children). Certain couples, though, think that an entertaining evening is hours upon hours of giving in to the constant demands for attention by their children.

I have, on several occasions, visited one friend's house to watch the "big game" only to be stuck watching "The Lion King" because it's the only thing that will keep the kids quiet. I love my friends and their kids, but I have had to bite my tongue many times, the most memorable when my friend advised his daughter to ask me nicely if I would move off the couch when she complained that I was sitting in "her spot".

We couples without children must understand that when our friends have children, the children are No. 1 to them. But parents must also realize that if they want to stay close with their friends, they might want to stop doing things that scream "you're not important" when we visit.

*Amy's Answer:* You raise an excellent point that I hope parents will absorb. I particularly treasure the image of a grown man in a tug-of-war with a toddler over a spot on the couch. In such matters, the toddler always seems to win._

Parents out there!!!! Are you listening????


----------



## brucec32

There will always be those who cannot understand how some people like coffee and some like tea.   And because you like tea the coffee drinker will become insanely suspicious and critical of you.  He is simply transferring his own insecurities over his decision onto you.  

My observation is that it works well for at most 50% of those who have kids.  Those are likely people who really want them.  The other 50% were either defective human beings or just doing what they figured society wanted them to do.  

I've witnessed enough family vitriol and bad blood in dozens of families to know that it isn't the dreamland for everyone some want to paint it to be.


----------



## Poppinsme

brucec32 said:


> There will always be those who cannot understand how some people like coffee and some like tea.   And because you like tea the coffee drinker will become insanely suspicious and critical of you.  He is simply transferring his own insecurities over his decision onto you.
> 
> My observation is that it works well for at most 50% of those who have kids.  Those are likely people who really want them.  The other 50% were either defective human beings or just doing what they figured society wanted them to do.
> 
> I've witnessed enough family vitriol and bad blood in dozens of families to know that it isn't the dreamland for everyone some want to paint it to be.



You are so right.
I have a friend that had 3 children because thats what her parents and husband wanted.  She didn't.  She is miserable and probably has taken it out on her children because they are in high school/college and have nothing to do with her.  As soon as the last one graduates she is divorcing her husband and moving out of town.  The whole thing is terribly sad because she says if they hadn't had children she probably would love her husband but because he forced her to have them she grew to resent DH.  I feel so bad for her and her children(who are great kids by the way).


----------



## honugirl

It's nice to see that people enjoyed the DCL vacations that are child-free. My significant other and I were thinking about taking one, but were worried about all of the children we might encounter. 

It's really nice to see a thread like this on the disboards. I made the mistake of opening my big mouth on another forum here and got chewed up and spit out by parents. 

I'm planning on having a tubal done here as soon as hockey season is over (for some reason, skating is much harder after surgery!). I've just never felt a desire to have children. I also have some health things that I really don't want to pass on and my career choice is one that is not conducive to child rearing. Nice to know there are some like minded people out there! And ones who like Disney to boot, even better!


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## ChisJo

Welcome honugirl! Yes, you are right - there are many people out there who believe that it is our human responsibility to have children and they don't understand our defective mind and decisions, but alas, we have grouped together and formed this new bond  

Hope everyone is doing alright - I'm working tons lately to make extra money for our upcoming trip (39 days!) so haven't been on much - any plans for Halloween?


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## mollygirl13

Hello all-
I just forund this forum and I am glad I did! I am 33 and DH is 32. We have been together for 17 years and married for 8. We have both known early on that we did not want children. Our families have known but always say,"You'll change your mind once you are older." Are you kidding me?? Even my friends, co-workers and patients I see (I do Mammography-saving lives every day!) say the same exact thing to me. My response has always been the same. My husband and I do not want children-EVER! We have 2 doggies that are our kids. We LOVE our life. We go to WDW 2 x a year and spend our summers at the beach. We take naps on the weekends and watch movies at night. We sleep in late and love each other more than anything else in the world! Even as we get older, we are a million percent happy with our decision! Deep down inside, I know my friends/family members who are parents secretly envy us for our lifestyle. But they never would admit it.
Thanks for listening. DH and I always thought we were alone in our decisions. I am glad to know that there are others out there who are just like us-childless by choice AND Disney lovers!!  

PS: We leave for WDW in 10 hours!!!


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## TXTurtles

Welcome onboard Mollygirl!  Whatever parents may say, I think I enjoy WDW FAR more without little ones to keep my eye on every second!  DH and I are very happy to keep our family limited to us.  I work with kids as a job so I'm not one of those who has trouble with anyone under college age - I really like those kids.  I especially like giving them back to their parents at the end of the day!

And we've totally gotten the "you'll feel differently when you're older" and "it's different when they're yours."  I had a friend say that today and my reponse (which is probably the first one I'm pleased with - most more resemble putting my foot down my throat) was that I wasn't willing to bet a child's life on it.  It worked on her.  I'll have to continue testing it, see how well it wears.    But yeah, DH and I are not terribly selfish people, as far as I can tell, we're just not good parents.  Good people, not good parents.  It's possible!

At the same time I love my kids I work with, adore my little nephew, and hope for a little niece before too long.  If I really feel the need to see Disney through the eyes of a child I'll borrow one of them and be the fun aunt.  But then, I've had the benifit of having an unmarried aunt as a friend my whole life.  She's the Aunt Mame in our family and it's WONDERFUL.  Why would I want to deprive my sis's kids of the same fun?


----------



## SanFranciscan

I don't know how long it is going to take me to read through all of these posts in what looks like an interesting thread, but I expect that I will probably try.

I don't have children.  My husband is my only family.  Nevertheless, I don't think I ever wanted children in more than a Norman Rockwell kind of way.  I am certain that my husband is right that we would have fought more if we had had children.  I know that I might regret not having them someday, but I would rather regret the children that I did not have than the children that I did.  

One option you can do to stop the pressure is voluntary sterilization.  Then you can honestly say that your doctor says that you can't have children and just looked distressed if someone is tacky enough to persue the subject.  They will assume that the infertility is involuntary and feel guilty enough to just knock it off.


----------



## ChisJo

SanFranciscan said:


> I would rather regret the children that I did not have than the children that I did.



Very well said....


----------



## honugirl

Thanks for the warm welcome ChrisJo. Go Oilers!  

I too get the "You'll change your mind." Or the "It's different when they're yours." Sigh. Not everyone was born to have children. I think it's better to realize it and not bring a child into a home where it's not truly wanted than to give in to societal pressure and make the kids feel bad. 

I love being able to go to WDW and do what I want to do. Stay out as late as I want to. Eat where I want to. And kiss  where I want to without feeling guilty.  

I like being able to go on vacation whenever I want to, where ever I want to and not worry about anything but a few houseplants.


----------



## dreaming_of_disney__

My 2 cents is this;

I think there is enormous societal pressure brought to bear on marrieds to have children.  The truth is that many child bearing couples lives have been enriched by having children, and they think that only by having children can you begin to understand the absolute joy they themselves feel in loving another so unconditonally.  So the logic would be that they feel you don't know what your missing if you choose not to reproduce, bringing about the "you'll change your mind" comments.
Also, as a species we are hardwired to reproduce, it's in our nature. So when the masses are happily following the biological imperative to go forth and multiply it's also natural to wonder about those who do not.

 I am a labor and delivery nurse so I see every spectrum of the childbearing woman . From the 13 year old who is still a child herself to the settled couple who begin child bearing after 40.  I also see women who are desperate to concieve who are in agony because they remain childless, they feel somehow less than, because thier bodies cannot do what they percieve every other woman takes for granted, they ability to have a child.  

What I see most of all unfortunately, is young 20 somethings, having kids without any thought to the impact these new people are going to have on their lives.  

You need to pass a test to aquire a liscence to drive a car, to prove to others that your capable and safe behind the wheel.  There is no skill testing question required to become a parent, and often it occurs without forthought and purpose.

I think that the majority of people who decide NOT to have childen give the decision a great deal of thought and don't take their choice lightly.  I only wish people were so deliberate in the decision to have kids rather then just kinda going along with the "next logical step in the circle of life" mindset.

In case you were wondering I'm 32 without children...
Personally, In my case if I were going to have a child I would want to be an excellent parent and I'm just not willing to put in the work required to be one.  Raising children into purposeful and productive and nice human beings takes a lot of effort. Call me selfish if you like... I prefer sensible.

We've all seen children who have NOT had the effort put in haven't we?

Sorry, got long winded, my 2 cents is now 4... 

Have a good day all!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

dreaming_of_disney__ said:


> My 2 cents is this;
> 
> I think there is enormous societal pressure brought to bear on marrieds to have children.  The truth is that many child bearing couples lives have been enriched by having children, and they think that only by having children can you begin to understand the absolute joy they themselves feel in loving another so unconditonally.  So the logic would be that they feel you don't know what your missing if you choose not to reproduce, bringing about the "you'll change your mind" comments.
> Also, as a species we are hardwired to reproduce, it's in our nature. So when the masses are happily following the biological imperative to go forth and multiply it's also natural to wonder about those who do not.
> 
> I am a labor and delivery nurse so I see every spectrum of the childbearing woman . From the 13 year old who is still a child herself to the settled couple who begin child bearing after 40.  I also see women who are desperate to concieve who are in agony because they remain childless, they feel somehow less than, because thier bodies cannot do what they percieve every other woman takes for granted, they ability to have a child.
> 
> What I see most of all unfortunately, is young 20 somethings, having kids without any thought to the impact these new people are going to have on their lives.
> 
> You need to pass a test to aquire a liscence to drive a car, to prove to others that your capable and safe behind the wheel.  There is no skill testing question required to become a parent, and often it occurs without forthought and purpose.
> 
> I think that the majority of people who decide NOT to have childen give the decision a great deal of thought and don't take their choice lightly.  I only wish people were so deliberate in the decision to have kids rather then just kinda going along with the "next logical step in the circle of life" mindset.
> 
> In case you were wondering I'm 32 without children...
> Personally, In my case if I were going to have a child I would want to be an excellent parent and I'm just not willing to put in the work required to be one.  Raising children into purposeful and productive and nice human beings takes a lot of effort. Call me selfish if you like... I prefer sensible.
> 
> We've all seen children who have NOT had the effort put in haven't we?
> 
> Sorry, got long winded, my 2 cents is now 4...
> 
> Have a good day all!




wonderfully put. I completely agree.


----------



## Donald&Tinkerbell

I, too, heard the "you'll change your mind, it's different when it's your own, and your biological clock will kick in".  I'm 54 years old, been married for 28 years and we haven't changed our minds nor do we have regrets.  You should think about being a parent and make a decision.  Oh, my favorite one?  Who will take care of you when you are old?  Like having children is a guarantee of being take care of when you get old!


----------



## Hixski

I don't think I have a biological clock. If I do I sure have never heard it ticking. I have said before DH and I were fence sitters but when nothing ever happened we just did not do anything about it. It was at that time we realized we weren't going to do anything about it and probably had never really wanted children that bad to begin with.

Next month I will be 48 and we still have not changed our minds. We have plenty of children in our lives whenever we want them. The great part of that is you get to give them back.


----------



## Prinny27

Donald&Tinkerbell said:


> I, too, heard the "you'll change your mind, it's different when it's your own, and your biological clock will kick in". I'm 54 years old, been married for 28 years and we haven't changed our minds nor do we have regrets. You should think about being a parent and make a decision. Oh, my favorite one? Who will take care of you when you are old? Like having children is a guarantee of being take care of when you get old!


 
DH and I were at a wedding this weekend and were talking to a couple that DH used to work with. Both us and the other couple are recently married and they asked when we were going to have kids. When we said we didn't want any they said, 'So you're just going to be married and that's IT!?!' So I said, 'what do you mean that's 'it'? That's FABULOUS!' It was like they were implying that they couldn't imagine being 'stuck' with just each other for the rest of their lives. Then the wife asked, 'well, who will take care of you when you get old?' To which I replied that that had to be the most selfish reason to ever want to have children. Not because I actually WANTED them, but because I need someone to look after me in my old age. Nevermind that it's no guarantee your kids will take care of you - they may live far away, they may not get along with you, or God forbid, you may outlive them. 

That shut that couple up very quickly!!!


----------



## TXTurtles

Yesterday morning was spent watching two boys who were just a continual fight to even control.  At least in this case I know it's not fully the parents' fault - they really do a fantastic job of raising and disciplining these two ... creative ... kids.  But it had been a rough week with the mom flying in and out of town for business stuff and their schedules were all out of whack.  And they don't do well with out-of-whack schedules.  One of the boys started amusing himself with eating paper and, in the end, I figured it's nontoxic and he was FINALLY not bothering others so ... well, he got a snack.

Afternoon was spent at an adult lunch party (nothing formal, just frozen lasagna at a friend's house) where one friend invited her friend and her family.  Two ~10 year olds who were COMPLETELY out of control.  I can handle a lot of kid behavior but I WILL NOT let a kid come up to me and order me to move because he wants my spot.  Or interrupt my conversation to say this.  I've also got something against kids pouring Code Red on light switches - but maybe that's just me.    

Everyone was very relieved when they left early.

And today I am very, very, very thankful to be child-free.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Donald&Tinkerbell said:


> I, too, heard the "you'll change your mind, it's different when it's your own, and your biological clock will kick in".  I'm 54 years old, been married for 28 years and we haven't changed our minds nor do we have regrets.  You should think about being a parent and make a decision.  Oh, my favorite one?  Who will take care of you when you are old?  Like having children is a guarantee of being take care of when you get old!



I'm 51....any so far we have me, Donald&Tinkerbell, and Hixsi in our age group...any lurkers out there who are our age and also never changed their minds??


----------



## maddhatir

PrincessKitty1 said:


> I'm 51....any so far we have me, Donald&Tinkerbell, and Hixsi in our age group...any lurkers out there who are our age and also never changed their minds??



I am 43 and DH is 41- We are not 50 however, I would have to say- my "childbearing" years would be WELL past me now! So I think we would be in the same boat....and in the clear!

I agree with Hix- no clock ticking in THIS body! Never has, never will 

OMG and Hix how about that new phrase we heard last week! "Toddler friendly"  I did not want to bring that bit of craziness over to here in the middle of it all, but now that it has died down.......we can comment about it! 

The Party City paper is not TODDLER FRIENDLY


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> OMG and Hix how about that new phrase we heard last week! "Toddler friendly"  I did not want to bring that bit of craziness over to here in the middle of it all, but now that it has died down.......we can comment about it!
> 
> The Party City paper is not TODDLER FRIENDLY



I was bothered by that...since when did ads need to be toddler friendly...or the holiday of Halloween for that matter?   Some people just confuse me.


----------



## TXTurtles

> OMG and Hix how about that new phrase we heard last week! "Toddler friendly"  I did not want to bring that bit of craziness over to here in the middle of it all, but now that it has died down.......we can comment about it!
> 
> The Party City paper is not TODDLER FRIENDLY



Ok, I'm missing a joke here and it sounds like a good one!  Share please?  

I just can't get my head around what "toddler friendly" would mean unless it includes bright colors and blunt edges...


----------



## honugirl

I almost died when I read that. Toddler friendly? Since when do toddlers go shopping for themselves? Last time I checked all my friends with kids do the shopping themselves... Some parents are so weird!

My clock has never ticked and if it 'aint broke don't fix it so to speak. Ha ha ha ha. Like my life is any less enriched because I don't have drool and spit up all over myself?


----------



## Hixski

TXTurtles said:


> Ok, I'm missing a joke here and it sounds like a good one!  Share please?
> 
> I just can't get my head around what "toddler friendly" would mean unless it includes bright colors and blunt edges...




There was someone posting that the Party City ads showed Halloween stuff for adults and were not "toddler friendly". There was a lot more craziness about Halloween but that is the crux of the joke. Madd was just posting about PC gone wild and the craziness began.


----------



## Markstudy

maddhatir said:


> I am 43 and DH is 41-


Wow same age as my wife and myself.

We got back from Disney last week. We had a little problem....they wouldn't let my wife into Jelly Rolls at the BoardWalk because we didn't bring our picture ID and when they asked her birthday she said she was 43 and they didn't believe her.... I leaned in and said "we don't have kids"... they laughed and let us both in   




I took a lot of fun photos but I noticed that my wife always has a nice peaceful look on her face. The folks we joined for diner that night had kids...their faces looked more serious... I never would have thought about it, but I was thinking like a photographer, and I told my wife- you know that look you always have on your face? Its the "look" of not having kids  

We are enjoying our lifestyle  Age is not a number....its a state of mind


----------



## TKDisneylover

Just a lurker popping in.....



PrincessKitty1 said:


> I'm 51....any so far we have me, Donald&Tinkerbell, and Hixsi in our age group...any lurkers out there who are our age and also never changed their minds??



I am 43 & DH is 42, we've been together for 26 years now(dated 6/married 20) and have never changed our minds.  It's funny how many people are amazed when they hear how much fun DH & I have, and we "don't have kids?!"   We always get comments like, you guys must really be soul mates or kids at heart, as if there is no fun when your "just a couple" with no kids!  I love it! 




Markstudy said:


> Wow same age as my wife and myself.
> 
> We got back from Disney last week. We had a little problem....they wouldn't let my wife into Jelly Rolls at the BoardWalk because we didn't bring our picture ID and when they asked her birthday she said she was 43 and they didn't believe her.... I leaned in and said "we don't have kids"... they laughed and let us both in    I took a lot of fun photos but I noticed that my wife always has a nice peaceful look on her face. The folks we joined for diner that night had kids...their faces looked more serious... I never would have thought about it, but I was thinking like a photographer, and I told my wife- you know that look you always have on your face? Its the "look" of not having kids  We are enjoying our lifestyle  Age is not a number....its a state of mind



Same ages here, and your wife is gorgeous by the way!  And your right, she has the "look" of not having kids, very peaceful.  I have to say it definitely keeps that look of aging at bay.  I'm always glad when people in their 20's & 30's guess our ages in the low to mid 30's, could we possibly look 10 years younger because we chose not to have children and get all stressed out because it's what we were "supposed to do?!"

Have a magical day everyone!


----------



## maddhatir

Markstudy said:


> Wow same age as my wife and myself.
> 
> I never would have thought about it, but I was thinking like a photographer, and I told my wife- you know that look you always have on your face? Its the "look" of not having kids
> 
> We are enjoying our lifestyle  Age is not a number....its a state of mind



Your wife is adorable! And I agree! (SOME- ok a lot!) of people with kids have that confused look on their faces  And I think kids make your hair prematurely gray 

I absolutely agree that most people without kids look more _refreshed_ and younger than they really are!


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## Jenngoofys

First Off I have a child  Secondly I would not trade her for the world now that I have her. However I admire all of you for choosing not to have children and live your own lives how you choose not how others think you should. I love my daughter she is almost 7 but I can see how much having a child has changed our lives, some good some bad. I can definetly see the appeal of not having children and enjoying each others company, being able to travel more, so much more time for each other. I know I miss those days alot.  I can see both sides of the coin and honestly both have their high points  So just wanted to say I think you all deserve more support in your choice  Not easy when so many think you should do what they think you should. LOL

Goofy


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## ChisJo

good day everyone....i wanted to say that today seems like it's going to be a toddler friendly day! Sorry - just couldn't help myself...

where were you all so lucky to meet a mate/significant other who shared your desire to not have children?


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## PrincessKitty1

OK, it looks like a fair number of over-40s on this thread!  Not that being under 40 is a bad thing   , it's just that hearing all my life that I would change my mind <sigh>, it's great to meet other over-40s who didn't change their minds, either!  

Re: meeting my husband, I was out at a restaurant with a girlfriend and a guy we both knew from work walked in with my future DH.   We invited them to sit with us and that was that....we have been together over 21 years (I was 29 and DH was 31 when we met).

When DH and I talked about having children when we first fell in love, I said I didn't want children but I would CONSIDER having a child if he really wanted one.  He said he didn't want children but would CONSIDER having one if I really wanted one.  We both breathed a great sigh of relief and that was that.  We did revisit the idea of having children when I was in my late 30s, and decided we still didn't want kids.

If I was single now, I think I would be looking online at Match.com or whatever....I never particularly liked dating but LOVE being in a relationship.


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## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> good day everyone....i wanted to say that today seems like it's going to be a toddler friendly day! Sorry - just couldn't help myself...



OMG! For some reason when I saw this- I thought of the "Terror Alert" chart! 

Looks like a "toddler friendly" day- we are going to RAISE the threat level to RED for all CF people!


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## maddhatir

Jenngoofys said:


> Not easy when so many think you should do what they think you should. LOL
> 
> Goofy



Just say NO to "them"


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> I am 43 and DH is 41- We are not 50 however, I would have to say- my "childbearing" years would be WELL past me now! So I think we would be in the same boat....and in the clear!



Recently turned 38 & I have to agree those years have passed.  I may still be young at heart (even got proofed @ the packy the other day!) but I know physically I couldn't do every day what I see my sister in-law-doing.  

Plus my doctor told me when I went in to be "fixed" that come age 40 she would have really been pushing for us to do something - guess that is some magic # if you haven't had kids, you shouldn't start.  

I prefer just being the Chief Aunt in Charge of Silly Stuff!  If I had my own kids I couldn't do half of what I do for my nieces & nephews.  And I honestly believe I'm really contributing something unique & special to their lives.


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## honugirl

It's only 3:30 am here this morning, but I was just checking to see what the "toddler friendlyness" of today was? Any idea? Just trying to gauge if I should stay inside all day or not... Ha ha ha ha


----------



## maddhatir

honugirl said:


> It's only 3:30 am here this morning, but I was just checking to see what the "toddler friendlyness" of today was? Any idea? Just trying to gauge if I should stay inside all day or not... Ha ha ha ha




At 3:30AM- you should be good to go! 

Now today- I would certainly check AC Moore craft store off your list- well, not just today- I would say any day! Not sure if it is like this around the country- but- every single time I go to this place- there are Kids in carts everywhere! 

Weird, b/c I go to Jo~Ann fabrics- no kids- and Michaels- nothing! It is JUST AC Moore! 

AC Moore MUST be "toddler friendly"


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## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> At 3:30AM- you should be good to go!
> 
> Now today- I would certainly check AC Moore craft store off your list- well, not just today- I would say any day! Not sure if it is like this around the country- but- every single time I go to this place- there are Kids in carts everywhere!
> 
> Weird, b/c I go to Jo~Ann fabrics- no kids- and Michaels- nothing! It is JUST AC Moore!
> 
> AC Moore MUST be "toddler friendly"




well good thing we don't have an AC Moore! I'll just stick with Joann's and be kid free and happy! 

Btw, as to how I met my DH:
We actually met online. Not on any service, just through AOL. He IMed me about 6 and  half years ago, cause he thought I had a cool profile. wanted to meet. I was dating someone and thought it wrong. Zoom forward almost a year and he IMed me again. I was single this time and thought what the heck. I'd meet up with him. we started dating right away and moved in together after a few months. We talked early on about kids and were both relieved to find out that neither of us liked kids at all and had no desire to have any..ever! So I was lucky!


----------



## honugirl

Ha ha ha ha ha.    

Good thing we don't have an AC Moore either. I'm going to have to ask my Jersey friends if it's an East Coast thing or something. 

I'm not a crafter so whew. One less place to worry about. 

I just saw a commercial for Toys R Us and their "Big Book of Toys" is coming out on Sunday. Will that be toddler friendly? If I recall last year it had that weird jaggedy edge out here. It might cause a paper cut.


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## maddhatir

honugirl said:


> I'm not a crafter so whew. One less place to worry about.



Oh- I am NOT a crafter!   (NOT THAT ANYTHING IS WRONG WITH THAT ) Sometimes I will pick up different paper (better selection than Staples) I got cool pieces of material and use them as bandanas when I ride the bike. They have some cool little thingy there. 

And they have a nice selection of holiday decorations.  

I got this awesome arbor from Michaels for 25 bucks using a coupon!


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## KirklandTutu

I'm a younger thirtysomething, so there's a least a couple on here!

So, question, I'm wanting to do a pre-trip/post-trip report for our February trip.  Would it be ok to put it on this forum instead of the trip report forum?   I love writing them, but I'd prefer writing it for a specific audience.


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> I'm a younger thirtysomething, so there's a least a couple on here!
> 
> So, question, I'm wanting to do a pre-trip/post-trip report for our February trip.  Would it be ok to put it on this forum instead of the trip report forum?   I love writing them, but I'd prefer writing it for a specific audience.



I, for one, do not mind. 

You know what you can do- you can post it here and put a link in your siggy in case anyone else wants to read it. I see some people doing that.


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## ChisJo

Shyvioletisme said:


> Btw, as to how I met my DH:
> We actually met online. Not on any service, just through AOL. He IMed me about 6 and  half years ago, cause he thought I had a cool profile. wanted to meet. I was dating someone and thought it wrong. Zoom forward almost a year and he IMed me again. I was single this time and thought what the heck. I'd meet up with him. we started dating right away and moved in together after a few months. We talked early on about kids and were both relieved to find out that neither of us liked kids at all and had no desire to have any..ever! So I was lucky!



Very similar story to how we met....I was dating someone, not really seriously as he worked out of town, so I had my profile on Plenty of Fish...My now BF emailed me and wanted to chat, but I wasn't interested b/c of my casual BF. But, I actually read his profile one day and was totally interested in meeting him. I sent him a message back, with more information than I usually put on those replies (I don't know why I did, I was just replying to his message...). 6 months later, we own a condo together, and 1 year later, we are still happy in love (I actually got the comment the other day that I'm glowing). We talked about kids on the second date, both stating that we don't want, I never have....he has a son from a previous marriage, and he doesn't want anymore...fine with me! Worked with me....his son (age 12) lives in a different province, so we don't see him very often, but he is a very good kid. Now, if he lived with us, that might be a different story!


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## kennancat

I was thinking about "the peaceful look" while driving home today. Why? Because I noticed there are two types of people that drive like maniacs on the highway - the young 20s males (not all of them of course, but there seem to be a good number) and the parents in their minivans or SUVs. Having seen my co-workers rush out the door to pick up their kids, I can understand - they've got to go get Johnny and Suzie from daycare before six, or they're going to get charged $10 a minute, then they've got to get the kids to soccer and ballet, then get them home, make some dinner, supervise the homework, and finally get the kids off to bed. I, on the other hand, am driving home with people zipping all around me (just for the record I'm already going 10 MPH over the limit) and thinking, "gosh people, slow down! What's your hurry?"  I think not having kids makes me a safer driver 

Totally off-topic from above - do any of you regularly have formal portraits done of yourself and spouse? I got one of those mailings for portraits (of course showing a smiling mom, dad, and kids) on the cover. I really like having the photos done, but I don't think DH and I have done it since our last cruise. I don't want to miss out on that just because we don't/may not ever have kids.


----------



## TXTurtles

kennancat said:


> Totally off-topic from above - do any of you regularly have formal portraits done of yourself and spouse? I got one of those mailings for portraits (of course showing a smiling mom, dad, and kids) on the cover. I really like having the photos done, but I don't think DH and I have done it since our last cruise. I don't want to miss out on that just because we don't/may not ever have kids.



First, I agree with you about drivers.  It's not absolute (just like it's no absolute that women are worse drivers or teen boys are always reckless) but thinking about it ... most of the people on my list of Those I Will Never Ride With Again are moms.  Hm.

And on photos - I'm not big into staged portraits no matter what the group, but I'd do one of those western portraits with my DH in a second.  I think that one would be far more fun with just the two of us.  Oh, or a pirates theme .. arg  .  Granted, I come from a family where group portraits only happen once a decade if you're lucky.  DH is the same.  My feel on the whole thing - if DH and I wanted a studio picture, we'd get one.  It wouldn't cross our minds that it's a married-with-kids-only thing.  

Of course, we also do character meals if we want, go to ren faires in garb, and have gone to a movie premier in costume so maybe we're not the best people to ask about what's "normal" or "proper."  Life's so much better this way.


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## PrincessKitty1

Re: portraits--DH and I had a portrait done early on (when we were both in our early 30s) but not since.  We've decided instead to pick our favorite Photopass picture each year (preferably from the Food and Wine Fest, because we have such a heavenly time  ) and consider that our yearly portrait!


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## zima-cheryl

TXTurtles said:


> Life's so much better this way.



AMEN To That!


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## honugirl

I second that Amen!


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## TKDisneylover

KirklandTutu said:


> So, question, I'm wanting to do a pre-trip/post-trip report for our February trip.  Would it be ok to put it on this forum instead of the trip report forum?   I love writing them, but I'd prefer writing it for a specific audience.



I was actually thinking this same thing with our trip coming up.  Then I would not feel like I need to keep our "party" time to a minimum in the report. 



kennancat said:


> I was thinking about "the peaceful look" while driving home today. Why? Because I noticed there are two types of people that drive like maniacs on the highway - the young 20s males (not all of them of course, but there seem to be a good number) and the parents in their minivans or SUVs. Having seen my co-workers rush out the door to pick up their kids, I can understand - they've got to go get Johnny and Suzie from daycare before six, or they're going to get charged $10 a minute, then they've got to get the kids to soccer and ballet, then get them home, make some dinner, supervise the homework, and finally get the kids off to bed. I, on the other hand, am driving home with people zipping all around me (just for the record I'm already going 10 MPH over the limit) and thinking, "gosh people, slow down! What's your hurry?"  I think not having kids makes me a safer driver



I have this situation all the time with the mini vans, *in the morning*!!  "They" are late getting Johnny & Suzie to the babysitter/daycare and then to their jobs!  I cannot tell you how many times they have been riding my a**, and I too go over the speed limit.  Could you imagine if they had an accident, I'm sure it would not be their fault because they were driving too fast!!! 

Have a magical day everyone!


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## honugirl

Personally, I'd really like to hear what another group of adults does for fun in the evenings and how they party. Please post here. Not everything has to be "sanitized." 

I thought I was the only one that had that problem... wow! Sheesh. I hate when they ride my tail too because you know if I did that to them and there was an accident, it would be "how could you do that, you could kill my kids." 

The other thing I hate is listening to them complain about having to take their kids places. If it's such a bother, why do you do it? We only did stuff on the weekends until I got older and got a horse, then I had to ride the horse every day. But then again, we knew how to play on our own outdoors with our imagination.


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## Hixski

I was talking with one of the security guards at my work. He is going to the Police Academy at our local college. He said the worst drivers in our area are not the teenagers (and he said they are pretty bad) but "soccer moms in their minivans". He said they are taught that this group is usually the most distracted. Talking on cells phones while rushing a group of 4-6 kids somewhere. They are usually running late hence the need to practically run people off the road.


----------



## KirklandTutu

Ok, I'll do the thread!

and, dude, totally there with you on the minivan derbys.  

I have about an hour long commute, each way, but I find it relaxing.  Time alone with NPR or music of my choice.  I drive through a wooded valley instead of the interstate, it's nice.  The only time my peaceful time is ruined is when those suv's and minivan's decide to ride my a** on a two lane windy road...I'm already going 10 over, stop blinking your lights at me!


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## maddhatir

honugirl said:


> Personally, I'd really like to hear what another group of adults does for fun in the evenings and how they party. Please post here. Not everything has to be "sanitized."



Do you mean partying in Disney?? Or real life 

And I guess I am the lucky one- I work from home and I do not have to do the commute with the psychos!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

maddhatir said:


> Do you mean partying in Disney?? Or real life



My question too!

At Disney, we are generally too exhausted to party at night.  We ALWAYS say we'll finally go to the Adventurer's Club, but we've never been!  By the time we exit Epcot, we're more than ready to head back to the resort, have something to eat, and go to bed.

In real life--DH and I love to see live music.  We have friends who play roots music (bluegrass, folk, old-time, blues, etc.) at our local dive bar once a week, so we go there Tuesday evenings when I'm not working.

There's also a restaurant/bar nearby that has live music once a week on Sunday evenings (it's where we first heard Sister Hazel, back when they were just a local band!) and we go there when we're in the mood.

We also go out with friends for dinner, or eat dinner in with friends and have a bluegrass jam after dinner (actually it's usually the guys playing music and the girls chatting  ).

Other than that, DH and I go away about one weekend a month, to Disney, St. Augustine, a music festival, or whatever.  We do hit the restaurants and sometimes a bar or two  when we go to the beach.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

maddhatir said:


> And I guess I am the lucky one- I work from home and I do not have to do the commute with the psychos!



Oh, I am green, GREEN with envy!  I am always trying to figure out a way I can make a living from home....but I can't come up with any ideas that would also include health insurance (DH is self-employed so I need to be the one to work corporate!).

I have a buddy at work who recently came to work at the hospital ONLY for the insurance.  She was making much more $$$ doing childcare in her home, being a nanny, and doing some creative babysitting (putting up flyers for babysitting during football games--she made pretty great money for 4 hours of work!).

I have a good friend who does computer-related work for a bank from home.  She works a regular 40-hour week but LOVES working from home.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

sounds like more CF-Bliss is going around.  We just got back from an amazing weekend at F&W doing nothing but eating, imbibing.  I saw the best thing ever for keeping kids with the parents.  It was a leash for kids!  The kids wore it like a harness and the mother yanked them back when they tried to do anything.  Now that's an idea!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Mrs.Reese said:


> sounds like more CF-Bliss is going around.  We just got back from an amazing weekend at F&W doing nothing but eating, imbibing.  I saw the best thing ever for keeping kids with the parents.  It was a leash for kids!  The kids wore it like a harness and the mother yanked them back when they tried to do anything.  Now that's an idea!



I can't wait to do W&F next year.  We were supposed to go this October, but a new job for DH pushed it out.   

I actually have to defend the leash for kids - in the right situation it is a good thing.  My brother & sister-in-law have 6 kids (some biological & some adopted foster kids - but all ours!) and one of the wee-ones has some serious issues.  Any time they go big places w/big crowds she is on her leash.  She is never yanked, pulled, drug or mistreated in any way, but for her own safety (and the families sanity) it really is the best thing.  I hate to imagine what could happen if she wandered off... esp. w/so many nut-jobs out there trolling for kids now days!!!

Of course the real issue is the birth parents that messed the kid up so bad in the first place!     But we won't go there....


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Mrs.Reese said:


> sounds like more CF-Bliss is going around.  We just got back from an amazing weekend at F&W doing nothing but eating, imbibing.  I saw the best thing ever for keeping kids with the parents.  It was a leash for kids!  The kids wore it like a harness and the mother yanked them back when they tried to do anything.  Now that's an idea!




I would really hate to see a parent "yanking" a child on a leash because that's abusive.  Zima-Cheryl's point on leashes is well-taken (she mentioned having a niece who needs to be tethered when they go out in public places, or she would run away, due to serious issues of past abuse), but to Mrs. Reese, I must say, YANKING would be abusive.

Just because I choose not to have children does not mean I think parents need to abuse their children to make them behave (and I'm talking about the "yanking," not the leash).


----------



## TKDisneylover

PrincessKitty1 said:


> My question too!
> 
> At Disney, we are generally too exhausted to party at night.  We ALWAYS say we'll finally go to the Adventurer's Club, but we've never been!  By the time we exit Epcot, we're more than ready to head back to the resort, have something to eat, and go to bed.



DH & I have been able to somewhat plan our "party" time.  And we also take mid-day breaks to keep us going.  I guess you could say we have our park touring to a science and do not do "commando" style.  I think it also helps that we can schedule our trips during non-peak times so we get our rides in with minimal wait times and also using fastpass.  And I will admit that I like to plan an itinerary with Tour Guide Mike's assistance.

To give you a little example:  Disney-MGM Studios-5:50 dinner at the Hollywood Brown Derby (Fantasmic! is at 6:30 so "they" are there waiting for the show to begin and we are enjoying dinner & drinks.), then we see the 8:00 Fantasmic!  EPCOT-6:00 dinner at Restaurant Marrakesh, then enjoy cocktails around World Showcase until Illuminations begins.  Our Animal Kingdom day ends early because the park closes early so we head back to the resort, nap, shower, then head to Downtown Disney-7:00 dinner at Raglan Road then head to the Comedy Club & the Adventurers Club (which we have a blast at every time!)  Hope I didn't just jinx myself....  I could keep going on but I don't want to bore you with our entire itinerary.  I'll save that for the possible pre-trip/trip report.


----------



## Liisa

Wow... I got busy and missed about 4 pages of conversation.  DH has been working crazy, my company just launched three new products, add in a couple sick days (I caught some kind of bug) and the puppy (the 100 lb, 27 inches at the shoulders 1 year old puppy) had a slipping patella (a knee cap that slipped out of its groove occassionally).  Thankfully, I'm better, the puppy's knee is back to normal (if he didn't run around like a maniac and smack it into the door then it would never have been a problem in the first place.  Crazy dog!)  And now I'm catching up.   

As for how DH and I met... we worked together at our first jobs out of college (he graduated a couple years ahead of me).  He ended up being my supervisor on my first audit.  And me, being a bit of a smarta**, decided that I was clearly capable of more than checking shipping documents.  Needless to say, he wasn't impressed and we didn't speak much for a while.  Then we get put on a second audit together that was much further away.  For the sake of saving gas money we decide to commute together, stopping to get coffee and muffins on the way, by the end of the first week, we were friends, by the end of the second week we were dating.  10 years later, happily married with two dogs!   

Madd... I know you've taken your niece / nephew (can't remember which, sorry!) to WDW.  Did you do anything special in your planning.  I was on a family board where the parents are going absolutely NUTS hand making autograph books, putting together goody bags for the plane, planning all sorts of special "things".  Now I'm concerned.  We are taking my 13 yo niece and 5 yo nephew in December.  I bought them each a disposable camera, told them to bring some DVD's for our DVD player for the plane ride, and planned dinners that weren't too stuffy for the younger ones.  Am I missing something?  I kind of though WDW was entertaining enough?!!   

Oh.. and my 2 cents, I think Mrs Reese was speaking a bit tongue in cheek when she mentioned that the kids were yanked back.  To my recollection, she is a school teacher and certainly wouldn't condone any form of child abuse.  

Good to see so many new happy CF'ers on here!!!  

Liisa


----------



## PrincessKitty1

Liisa said:


> Oh.. and my 2 cents, I think Mrs Reese was speaking a bit tongue in cheek when she mentioned that the kids were yanked back.  To my recollection, she is a school teacher and certainly wouldn't condone any form of child abuse.
> Liisa



I'm glad you're so certain, but I don't find any reference to "yanking" a kid on a leash, tongue in cheek or not, to be acceptable.


----------



## PrincessKitty1

TKDisneylover, DH and I have also gone to dinner at Raglan Road with the intention of moving on to the Adventurer's Club....but we enjoyed the Irish band so much that we stayed at RR until it closed!

DH and I spend probably 90% of our WDW time at Epcot, so we've had a lot of grown-up fun in the evening cruising the Food and Wine Festival booths, eating at various table service restaurants, and (one of our favorite things to do) buying champagne at the France kiosk for me and beer at the UK for DH and running back and forth to catch as many British Invasion, Mo' Rockin', and Off Kilter shows as we can!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Madd... I know you've taken your niece / nephew (can't remember which, sorry!) to WDW.  Did you do anything special in your planning.  I was on a family board where the parents are going absolutely NUTS hand making autograph books, putting together goody bags for the plane, planning all sorts of special "things".  Now I'm concerned.  We are taking my 13 yo niece and 5 yo nephew in December.  I bought them each a disposable camera, told them to bring some DVD's for our DVD player for the plane ride, and planned dinners that weren't too stuffy for the younger ones.  Am I missing something?  I kind of though WDW was entertaining enough?!!
> 
> Oh.. and my 2 cents, I think Mrs Reese was speaking a bit tongue in cheek when she mentioned that the kids were yanked back.  To my recollection, she is a school teacher and certainly wouldn't condone any form of child abuse.
> 
> Good to see so many new happy CF'ers on here!!!
> 
> Liisa



Hi Lis!

Glad to hear everything is OK now with you and your pup!

One year DH and I took our niece (3 at the time) and last year we went with BIL and SIL (niece then 4 and nephew then 2) They are going again this year- Next month actually, but DH and I are skipping- 

MY SIL packed her DVD player for the plane and we had one woman comment to us that she had no idea there was a child even sitting behind us! She was SO good on the plane! Thank GOD! That was our worse fear- that she would act up on the plane. She loved it. 

This is a good site to download Mousekeeping envelopes and games- When it was just Me, DH and Karlee (my niece) I let my niece pick out which envelope she wanted to give each day
http://www.mouseforless.com/downloads/tripdownloads.shtml. She was also in a stroller at the time- so I went to Joann Fabrics and got those pieces of fabric that come 5 in a pack- I chose Scooby b/c she likes him- I let her pick a fabric every day to put on her stroller so "she" can pick it out of the sea of strollers- She thought that was great that she found "her" stroller.

The luggage tags are cute- I chose one for each of us. Last year- (I forget where I found them) I printed out extra pics of all of the dwarfs for each one of us adults- I was Dopey, SIL was Happy, BIL was Grumpy and DH was Doc! 

Both times I chose character meals for the kids. My nephew, Dylan, it was his first time to Disney last year- he HATED the characters- but both times Karlee loved them! 

Wispering Canyon is so much fun with kids! Just keep the "asking for the ketchup" a secret from them and have them as for it! They may also  like 50's Prime Time. 

Your niece may not be too thrilled about this- but your nephew may like all the Kidcot stations in Epcot. Karlee had a ball coloring her masks and we told her to find the stations in each country and land. 

OMG NO- I did NOT "make" an autograph book- we just bought her one and a pen and got in line with her and she learned to do the rest! She got to the point that she knew she had to have her pen and book! 

For the plane- SIL just packed us snacks for her.

Let me tell you- DH now hates Disney b/c of all the anal planning I did the past few trips! We used to "wing it" when we went to Disney and would have a ball- until I found the DIS and started planning to "death" it ruined it for him and he said it is going to be a long time before he will want to go back! 

So- just a warning- don't worry about planning too much like others do- just go with the flow- have a basic plan and ENJOY! That is my word of advice now that I have learned my lesson- learned too late- but I have learned!


----------



## maddhatir

PrincessKitty1 said:


> TKDisneylover, DH and I have also gone to dinner at Raglan Road with the intention of moving on to the Adventurer's Club....but we enjoyed the Irish band so much that we stayed at RR until it closed!



OMG! AC is THE funnest!!!!!!!! We usually close the place. All you do there is drink and laugh....and laugh and laugh and sing while laughing!

It is a MUST do whenever you go! Be sure that you see the shows in every room! Don't miss any!

I said DH hates Disney now- he LOVES the AC club though. I am trying to convince him that I learned my lesson!

We have done a few F&Ws in the past and he really enjoyed that. I keep bringing up that MAYBEEEEEE we can to F&W next year and just wing it like we used too!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

maddhatir said:


> OMG! AC is THE funnest!!!!!!!! We usually close the place. All you do there is drink and laugh....and laugh and laugh and sing while laughing!
> 
> It is a MUST do whenever you go! Be sure that you see the shows in every room! Don't miss any!
> 
> I said DH hates Disney now- he LOVES the AC club though. I am trying to convince him that I learned my lesson!
> 
> We have done a few F&Ws in the past and he really enjoyed that. I keep bringing up that MAYBEEEEEE we can to F&W next year and just wing it like we used too!



OK, I'm TOTALLY convinced that DH and I need to head to the AC when we go to WDW next month.  Do we need to get there at opening and stay until closing in order to see the shows in every room??


----------



## maddhatir

PrincessKitty1 said:


> OK, I'm TOTALLY convinced that DH and I need to head to the AC when we go to WDW next month.  Do we need to get there at opening and stay until closing in order to see the shows in every room??



The shows are "revolving" 

Allears tells you all about it!
http://www.allearsnet.com/btp/faq_adv.htm

- If you have never been- I would go when it opens just to be sure you do not miss anything. Be sure to check out all the pics and stuff on the walls, and relax upstairs when you are done seeing each room. 

*Kungaloosh*!!!!!!


----------



## kennancat

Mrs.Reese said:


> sounds like more CF-Bliss is going around.  We just got back from an amazing weekend at F&W doing nothing but eating, imbibing.  I saw the best thing ever for keeping kids with the parents.  It was a leash for kids!  The kids wore it like a harness and the mother yanked them back when they tried to do anything.  Now that's an idea!





zima-cheryl said:


> I actually have to defend the leash for kids - in the right situation it is a good thing.  My brother & sister-in-law have 6 kids (some biological & some adopted foster kids - but all ours!) and one of the wee-ones has some serious issues.  Any time they go big places w/big crowds she is on her leash.  She is never yanked, pulled, drug or mistreated in any way, but for her own safety (and the families sanity) it really is the best thing.





PrincessKitty1 said:


> I would really hate to see a parent "yanking" a child on a leash because that's abusive.  Zima-Cheryl's point on leashes is well-taken (she mentioned having a niece who needs to be tethered when they go out in public places, or she would run away, due to serious issues of past abuse), but to Mrs. Reese, I must say, YANKING would be abusive.
> 
> Just because I choose not to have children does not mean I think parents need to abuse their children to make them behave (and I'm talking about the "yanking," not the leash).





PrincessKitty1 said:


> I'm glad you're so certain, but I don't find any reference to "yanking" a kid on a leash, tongue in cheek or not, to be acceptable.



Please, please no arguments about "kid leashes"! There are more than enough of those to go around on the family boards!


----------



## maddhatir

kennancat said:


> Please, please no arguments about "kid leashes"! There are more than enough of those to go around on the family boards!




ITA!


----------



## PrincessKitty1

kennancat said:


> Please, please no arguments about "kid leashes"! There are more than enough of those to go around on the family boards!




There is no arguing about kid leashes going on here.  I understand that some folks think they are useful.  The discussion is about YANKING kids on leashes.  I worked as a pediatric RN and case manager for many years, and I WILL NOT let a comment , tongue-in-cheek or otherwise, about YANKING a child on a leash go by without stating that YANKING a child on a leash is abusive.

People should be offended and angry about abusive behavior, not making jokes (?) about it.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Liisa said:


> Thankfully, I'm better, the puppy's knee is back to normal (if he didn't run around like a maniac and smack it into the door then it would never have been a problem in the first place.  Crazy dog!)



Don't you love it when the vet tells you to keep the dog from running around... yeah, like that will ever happen!?!?  No matter how banged up they are they just keep going!





Liisa said:


> Did you do anything special in your planning.  I was on a family board where the parents are going absolutely NUTS hand making autograph books, putting together goody bags for the plane, planning all sorts of special "things".  Now I'm concerned.  We are taking my 13 yo niece and 5 yo nephew in December.  I bought them each a disposable camera, told them to bring some DVD's for our DVD player for the plane ride, and planned dinners that weren't too stuffy for the younger ones.  Am I missing something?  I kind of though WDW was entertaining enough?!!



All we did for the kids last year was make each of them a fanny pack.  I put a disposable camera, some disney dollars, a small sunscreen & shoe/ID tag in each kids' bag.  The kids are so excited about going to Disney they don't much care - I can relate to that feeling.   

December should be great w/all the Christmas stuff up - the kids will have a good time.


----------



## maddhatir

PrincessKitty1 said:


> YANKING a child on a leash is abusive.
> 
> People should be offended and angry about abusive behavior, not making jokes (?) about it.



I have a feeling she was just using the word "yanking" to describe the situation. 

Maybe the mother was holding the leash and if the child started running- that would result in an unintentional....yank of the leash.

NO ONE here, just b/c we are childfree, would condone any form of child abuse. I am certain of that.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> December should be great w/all the Christmas stuff up - the kids will have a good time.



Yes! Be sure to see the Osborne lights- Word of advice- do not go as soon as they open- wait a while- we waited until maybe an hour before MGM closed and it was not as crowded!

Have you been to Disney at that time of year before If so- I am SURE you know what to see


----------



## Liisa

Thankfully, I have been at that time of year.  It's GORGEOUS!!!  Which is why we chose it.  My MIL hasn't been in 20+ years and her husband is from Portugal and has never ever been.  I think they are in for such a treat!!!  

I know what you mean about the Osborn lights.  The night we have that scheduled there are 2 Fantasmic showings... so I plan on hitting the Osborn lights (or whatever they are called now) during the first Fantasmic show... I did that a couple years ago and it was pretty deserted.  

44 days and counting!!!


----------



## Liisa

P.S.  Madd - I just noticed the lack of Johnny Depp photos... What happened?!!  They are one of the reasons I check for your new posts!


----------



## TXTurtles

Liisa said:


> We are taking my 13 yo niece and 5 yo nephew in December.  I bought them each a disposable camera, told them to bring some DVD's for our DVD player for the plane ride, and planned dinners that weren't too stuffy for the younger ones.  Am I missing something?  I kind of though WDW was entertaining enough?!!
> 
> Liisa



What fun!  Sounds like a fantastic combination - your niece will be old enough to really have a good time connecting with and that's an age where personal attention really pays off (even when they don't let you see it!) and she's old enough to help you with her little brother (they're sibs, right?).  I'd consider packing a coloring book or whatever will keep him occupied (his mom should know what his magic occupied item is) if lines are too long or he just needs something comfortingly familiar to do - but yeah, I don't think their lives will be forever ruined if you don't have daily presents for them or homemade pillowcases with embroidered princesses or all that other stuff.  We got whatever we packed for ourselves and I _think_ we all turned out fairly normal!

One thing about 5 year olds - great age (though I'm partial to 4s but that's me) but over stimulation, even if you're taking it easy, is a risk.  I remember when my youngest brother was that age he hit a point probably 4 days in where if he saw or heard another thing he was just going to completely loose it - his mind just couldn't handle all it was trying to take in.  I think at that point earmuffs and a blindfold would have been the best thing in the world for him but can you imagine the looks _that_ would have gotten!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> P.S.  Madd - I just noticed the lack of Johnny Depp photos... What happened?!!  They are one of the reasons I check for your new posts!



I have my Halloween Johnny in my siggy right now. Nov 1st I will add back the lucsious one of him lying across the bed. 

AND- now with the new siggy rules- I cannot fit a lot in the "box"

ETA---  right at this very minute I am watching The Ninth Gate and my baby is looking soooooo goooood~!



.


----------



## Liisa

TXTURTLE and Madd,

Thanks so much for the advice on bringing the little ones.  Hugely helpful.  And yes, they are siblings so I'm sure my niece will be a big help with my nephew.  Having only been down with my husband or other adults, I'm excited to see the magic from a younger perspective!!!  

The one thing I did make for them is one of those paper chains with a chain link for each day until the trip.  I figure, if my young nephew can visually see how many days until vacation, it might alleviate all the questions my sister in law would get about "when are we leaving"!!!  Anything crafty beyond that...  not so much.  But I have nothing against spoiling them with some nice store bought purchases once we are there!   

Good morning everyone!


----------



## ChisJo

well...yesterday reaffirmed my decision to stay child free. I sometimes sit on the fence with this, but know that I would not want to have any children at this point in my life (I'm 30, soon to be DH is 37). We talk every now and then about having kids (rarely), but he says he can't imagine kids in our lives for at least another 8 years - that would make me 38! I don't want kids that late in life....plus, that would make him 46 - I don't think he would want a new born at 46! Albeit, I couldn't imagine kids in our lives sooner than that anyways! We talk so often about our plans in life....our travels we want to do, the career choices we want to make, and our retirement, and everytime we talk, we never talk about the possibility of children being in that picture. We know that we are too into building our careers, travelling the world, and now we want to buy some vacation property in both Orlando and Hawaii, to get away when we feel the stresses of work are finally too much for us. 
We still get the pressures from others ("when are the kids coming?") but for the most part, people are understanding of our plans. Will we change our minds? Unlikely....I like how there are others out there that can understand our feelings. I hate how others can be so closed minded to our choices - I wouldn't argue with someones beliefs or choices if they chose to be catholic while I'm Christian. That's just ignorant.....But, as long as we live in a society where people believe that we are supposed to have children to fulfill our destinies, we will always have that outside pressure. But for now, I am content at being consumed by my career, my travels, my loving and most beautiful cat, but most importantly, the love that I have for the man I am going to be with for the rest of my life.


----------



## ChisJo

Madd - I too miss the Johnny pic on the bed....can't wait to see that one again....you know, I've thought that boy was good looking 20 years ago (I remember having pics of him from Teen mag. on my walls!). He seems to have gotten better throughout the years!


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> Madd - I too miss the Johnny pic on the bed....can't wait to see that one again....you know, I've thought that boy was good looking 20 years ago (I remember having pics of him from Teen mag. on my walls!). He seems to have gotten better throughout the years!



ChisJo- I like your new avatar! Your DH is a cutie! I LOVE the glasses! 

Here are a few of JD in bed for your viewing pleasure!.....and to hold you off until I can put the yummy pic back into my siggay after Halloween!  
















I think I will take these over the eye candy thread and put them there also!


----------



## kennancat

So, we went to a couple of Halloween parties last night, and the subject of our lack of children managed to come up at both. At the first (where we really only knew the hosts well), we ended up chatting with this one guy that we talked to at a previous party at the same house. He'd mentioned that time how he wasn't sure on the whole kids thing, but his wife definitely was ready for them. At this party, he asked if we were still "deliberately childfree". We said yep. He said had seen a lot of people crack on this one, so good for us. Then he mentioned he's decided he no longer has the choice in his relationship, it's more about stalling now.

At the second party, we knew a lot more people - it's a group of friends from the local college that we managed to meet a couple of years ago (we did not go to college with them). They are ALL starting to have kids now. One of them (and I should add that she was three sheets to the wind at this point) was asking us if we were ready to jump on the bandwagon yet, and I said no. Her response was, "oh good, because I want to be next." I told her I'd be very very happy to have her be next as opposed to me too!  We all got a good laugh out of that one.

I feel really lucky that we haven't gotten some of the comments that others here seem to - our friends and acquaintance seem _surprised_ about our decision at times, but largely seem to be of the opinion that if you do feel that way, it's okay to not have kids. Of course, the fact that they all are still means our social life is starting to slow down a bit. We've recently started talking about ways to add new friends to our life so that we're not stuck at home because all of our friends are at home with their kids. I have to say, finding good couple friends is tough! It's like dating times 4!  We did go out to dinner recently with one couple that I met through a local professional society and I told DH that it's his turn to go find a set too.   Anybody else got any good tips on finding couple friends?


----------



## ChisJo

Not that long ago, my BIL, who, by the way, is a very verbal person, and is kind of arrogant and, truthfully, not very well liked, said the most ignorant thing to me ever. First, let me tell you that my sis and him have been trying for 2 years to have a baby, and a few months ago, my sister found out that she may not be able to conceive a child (final results next week), so she is very devestated about that and an emotional wreck at times about it. So, we were all driving in the car somewhere (him, me and my sis) and the topic of my desire to not have kids comes up, and he sais it's my human DUTY to have children, and a responsibility to continue on my BF's name. It's wrong to not have children, he sais, and if you don't have children, you are an insult to human kind, and besides, who will take care of me when I'm old! - he said this in front of his WIFE who at the time was just going through all the emotions of finding out she probably will never be able to carry her own child. Anyways, long story short, she freaked out, and I just dropped it. I was so mad, that when I got home, my BF had to calm me down.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

ChisJo said:


> Not that long ago, my BIL, who, by the way, is a very verbal person, and is kind of arrogant and, truthfully, not very well liked, said the most ignorant thing to me ever. First, let me tell you that my sis and him have been trying for 2 years to have a baby, and a few months ago, my sister found out that she may not be able to conceive a child (final results next week), so she is very devestated about that and an emotional wreck at times about it. So, we were all driving in the car somewhere (him, me and my sis) and the topic of my desire to not have kids comes up, and he sais it's my human DUTY to have children, and a responsibility to continue on my BF's name. It's wrong to not have children, he sais, and if you don't have children, you are an insult to human kind, and besides, who will take care of me when I'm old! - he said this in front of his WIFE who at the time was just going through all the emotions of finding out she probably will never be able to carry her own child. Anyways, long story short, she freaked out, and I just dropped it. I was so mad, that when I got home, my BF had to calm me down.




That is horrible. Not just to you, but even more so to his wife. Geez. He sounds like a real winner. This sounds exactly like something my best friend's future husband would say..


----------



## Liisa

Madd,

Perfect way to start the week...  I needed that!

I went to a halloween party this weekend and my niece (the one we are taking to WDW) has a lifesize POTC cut out of Cap'n Jack.  She's so lucky.  I don't think DH would be ok if I had one.


----------



## kennancat

DH and I are watching Headlines from Leno last night (love the DVR) when they show this particular piece of furniture:






DH goes, "wow, what a great idea!"

No, dear - if we ever have kids, we are not locking them up in "baby jails".  
_
For anybody concerned, I found the website and this is "institutional furniture". I do not think it is intended for home use._


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## KirklandTutu

kennancat said:


> DH and I are watching Headlines from Leno last night (love the DVR) when they show this particular piece of furniture:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> DH goes, "wow, what a great idea!"
> 
> No, dear - if we ever have kids, we are not locking them up in "baby jails".
> _
> For anybody concerned, I found the website and this is "institutional furniture". I do not think it is intended for home use._



Wow... institutional or not, that still gets a single eyebrow raised and dead pan 'wow'


----------



## kmmccart75

Just got back from a week long Disney trip, celebrating six gloriously childfree years of marriage - during the trip, DH and I agreed that if either of us ever has any doubts about not wanting kids, we will take a trip to Disney first!  Not that we didn't have a wonderful time, just that it's amazing how so many families in the happiest place on Earth, are not so happy, and we are!  And if they're not happy there, then where?

For example, we were taking the elevator down from our room in the Boardwalk, and were on the elevator with two families.  This was in the morning, so you would think everyone would be fresh and rested (we were!).  One family had two small children who were absolute terrors, whining, pouting, hitting each other and everything else - and I glanced at the parents, who had apparently given up.  They had such long, tired, droopy faces, like I look or at least feel when I have the flu!  The other couple had a cute little well-behaved daughter, but they were snapping at each other under their breath every few seconds.  When we got off the elevator, I just looked at DH dreamily and said "THANK YOU" and he chuckled and gave me a kiss.

Also, I couldn't get over the number of parents who kept their infants and toddlers out till past midnight!    The ones that weren't passed out were screaming, and doing that sort of half-whine, half-fake-cry thing.  I mean, come on, those kids were exhausted and miserable and the parents didn't look happy either.  Actually, I would say only about one in four families looked like they were actually enjoying themselves at any given time, and virtually every childfree couple looked peaceful, romantic, and HAPPY to be at Disney!

I will let you all in on one of our little secrets.  Remember in the Lion King when Scar is telling the hyenas about his plan to get rid of Mufasa?  The hyenas start singing "no king, no king, lalalalalala!"  Well, whenever we are trapped next to a family meltdown, we will hum that little tune, or mime a little dance,  or maybe even just  wink at each other, and what we are singing in our head is "no kids, no kids, lalalalalala" and it reminds us that as soon as we get off that bus or out of that line, we will be blissfully childfree again!  Maybe you all can use that one too!

Well, sorry I rambled on so long - gotta get to bed now, hubby is waiting!


----------



## honugirl

Ahhhh, I've had those exact same feelings while at Disney world. Especially the "why are these kids out past midnight thing?" None of them look remotely interested in what's going on. Half are asleep, the other half are wailing. 

My SO and I have decided that Disney needs to do an extra magic hours for ADULTS ONLY in the evening. Restrict it to say, 21 and over. They could have EMH in another park for everyone so that you could choose, childfree EMH or regular EMH depending on what you wanted and which park you wanted to go to. Then we could have the totally blissful Disney experience. 

The first time I was there, this past June, we were at the little beer area at the British Pavilion, next to the restaurant (ok, it's late, forgive me for not remembering names) waiting for Illuminations to start. Next to us was a mom who was PLASTERED! We watched her down at least two of those huge beers and she had at least one before we got there. Husband was no where in sight. Two kids who were not the least bit excited to be sitting there waiting, both who had swords and shields from the Norway pavilion. The kids were fighting and climbing all over us. The husband finally arrives and gets into a fight with her about being plastered. Illuminations finally starts, the other half of the family arrives (another 8 people) and tries to butt in next to us (we were right on the wall at a table with a perfect view!). Then they got all snarky when we told them the kids were blocking my view (I had to sit, I was recovering from ankle surgery). After Illuminations the comments started flying from them about how rude we were. I wish I could have been a fly on the wall in their room later that night... Oh boy, must have been some vacation if mom needed to drink that much!!! And the families wonder why I run the opposite direction from them? It should be pretty obvious after that adventure!


----------



## ChisJo

honugirl said:


> The first time I was there, this past June, we were at the little beer area at the British Pavilion, next to the restaurant (ok, it's late, forgive me for not remembering names) waiting for Illuminations to start. Next to us was a mom who was PLASTERED! We watched her down at least two of those huge beers and she had at least one before we got there. Husband was no where in sight. Two kids who were not the least bit excited to be sitting there waiting, both who had swords and shields from the Norway pavilion. The kids were fighting and climbing all over us.



I vote her for parent of the year! That's awesome parenting right there! I hope she was the one that drove home that night, just to set a better example for her children.


----------



## honugirl

Well, the last we saw of her, she was headed towards the "friendship" so with a little maybe luck she fell off the back of the boat. Ha ha ha ha.


----------



## zima-cheryl

kmmccart75 said:


> ... just that it's amazing how so many families in the happiest place on Earth, are not so happy, and we are!  And if they're not happy there, then where?



I always thought a good way to make a fortune would be to set up a family counseling booth at Orlando Airport.  All those "happy" families are an untapped market!


----------



## dolcezena

Hi All!

Been away from this thread (& the Boards) for many months & just came back...

VERY happy to see this thread still alive & kicking! Especially considering how I feel after that debacle of a kid's day, Halloween! 

Have I ever mentioned that I live next door to a day care? 'Nough said.

Anywho, just wanted to say hi, & after skimming the occasional post that's popped up in the last few months, glad to see the CF community is still (mostly) thrilled to be CF. *Plgrn is gone?!!?*

DH needs the inter-web connection now. Guess I wasted too much time trying to figure out where I'd left off!

Hope to chat with y'all soon!

PS - Hixsi: LOOOOVE that snickers martini!


----------



## hopey1kenobi

OK, so here is my 2 cents. 

I have 3 kids, they are great. But there is not a day that goes by that I don't think about what my life would be like without them. I love my kids and wouldn't have done things different, but that being said, kids are hard work. You have to put their needs in front of yours. We are not poor by any means, but we have to budget to survive. DH and I have to put our marriage needs behinds the family needs. It's tough, exhausting but by far the most fulfilling adventure I have ever had.

DH and I are putting our plans on hold until the kids are out of the house. Our youngest is 1 so it's going to be a while. But in 17-18 years when they are out of the house, my DH will be retiring within 2-3 years of that and then it is our time. 

I do envy those who waited to have kids and had several years of kid free time with their spouses before having kids. That was not possible for DH and me as I had a DD from a previous relationship. Almost 5 years a of marriage and 2 more kids later we are planning for our kid free time. Yes we have to wait almost 2 decades for it but in the end it will be completely worth it. I do believe that if I hadn't had DD when DH and I got married we would be kid free and possible remain that way. 

My best friend is in a commited relationship and never wants kids. She loves mine to death but has never had a burning desire to have her own. I completely agree with her decision!! She is maternal and would make a great mother, but she does NOT want any. My kids are enough for her. I envy her lifestyle but I know that we made the best decision for DH and I. 

I'm not a kid person. Love mine, can't stand other people. It's not that I think mine are better, but mine get on my nerves, other people's drive me crazy. Like some people aren't cat or dog people, with me it's kids. 

Bottomline: If you don't want kids, don't have them. It's not selfish or anybody's business why. If you want to have kids, make sure you have them for the right reason.


----------



## Poppinsme

[I'm not a kid person. Love mine, can't stand other people. It's not that I think mine are better, but mine get on my nerves, other people's drive me crazy. Like some people aren't cat or dog people, with me it's kids.]



What an odd thing to say.   Why have children then?  You sound like your not real happy.  And thats sad.


----------



## hopey1kenobi

Poppinsme said:


> [I'm not a kid person. Love mine, can't stand other people. It's not that I think mine are better, but mine get on my nerves, other people's drive me crazy. Like some people aren't cat or dog people, with me it's kids.]
> 
> What an odd thing to say.   Why have children then?  You sound like your not real happy.  And thats sad.



For starters I am very happy and fulfilled with my life. My children are a huge part of that. I was just being honest that I don't like being around peoples kids, i'm sorry if you think that is sad. I guess you think it sounds like I hate my kids or can't stand them. That is not the case in any way, shape or form. I love my kids, I love their little personalities, quirks, laughs, smiles and cries. When they are angels and little devils. 

Parents should admit that sometimes their children get on their nerves and that sometimes you need to take a short break from your children, I'm not saying leave the country to get away, but everyone once in a while you need 5 minutes to yourself.


----------



## ChisJo

hopey1kenobi said:


> I'm not a kid person. Love mine, can't stand other people. It's not that I think mine are better, but mine get on my nerves, other people's drive me crazy. Like some people aren't cat or dog people, with me it's kids.



I actually can respect you for saying this. I think there are alot of parents who do feel that way, but wouldn't ever say it....I think it's great that you can recognize that.


----------



## kennancat

Poppinsme said:


> [I'm not a kid person. Love mine, can't stand other people. It's not that I think mine are better, but mine get on my nerves, other people's drive me crazy. Like some people aren't cat or dog people, with me it's kids.]
> 
> 
> 
> What an odd thing to say.   Why have children then?  You sound like your not real happy.  And thats sad.


I think this is very common. Just because somebody doesn't get all gooey about children doesn't mean that they are a bad parent. I've heard many people whom I consider to be good parents share this sentiment, especially given the way that some poor parents allow their children to behave these days. And by the way, it's "you're", not "your". Why can't the trolls spell?

Welcome to the thread, hopey1kenobi. Come and be judged with us evil childfree people


----------



## dolcezena

kennancat said:


> And by the way, it's "you're", not "your". Why can't the trolls spell?



Apparently they don't know how to "quote" either....


I agree with ChrisJo too, I _know _there are parents out there who don't think all kids are great - my sister is one of them! Adores her daughter (who we'll call Peanut), but even Peanut drives her up the wall sometimes. How could you not be pushed over the edge by a child that bangs her head off the floor when she doesn't get her way??? (She's 18 mths old)

On another note, I just read a newspaper article about people spending huge amounts of money on their pets. Included in this article was a summary of a survey. A (very) small percentage of people thought that pet owners that lavish gifts on their pets are "trying to fill a void" in their lives.

I can only assume that they think "the void" is due to the pet owner's lack of children. 

I spoil my dogs & cat rotten!!! And it's *not *because I feel a void because I'm child-free. It's because how else do you reward that unquestioning devotion a pet gives you!?!? 

The best thing is, they don't grow up & ask for the car keys!


----------



## KirklandTutu

*flame retardant suit on*

Everytime I see a post asking about wether or not it's ok to bring kids to Bistro de Paris, I want to scream 'NO'.  Why?  you may ask.  It has no kids menu, therefore that says to me in gentle Disney-speak that this is the one place that adults can look at and breathe easy and not have to even think that there might be one screaming child.  Am I a bad person because of this?  no.  Do I understand that it's Disney and one has to expect children? yes.  I just wish that parents would truly consider other adults in the parks and see that it's sometimes it's best to just go to Chefs de France or get a babysitter.  There is a very big part of me screaming to do whatever they want, but not on that evening in February while I'm there.

I really wish that there were one or two resteraunts that were no children allowed.  Or perhaps lounges that were truly no children allowed and that had a pretty full aray of food.  If adults are such a big part of the growing demographic of Disney, it would stand to reason that there might be room for one or two of those places.


*chooses to live flame suit on, as to not have a death by admonishing*


----------



## hopey1kenobi

KirklandTutu said:


> *flame retardant suit on*
> 
> Everytime I see a post asking about wether or not it's ok to bring kids to Bistro de Paris, I want to scream 'NO'.  Why?  you may ask.  It has no kids menu, therefore that says to me in gentle Disney-speak that this is the one place that adults can look at and breathe easy and not have to even think that there might be one screaming child.  Am I a bad person because of this?  no.  Do I understand that it's Disney and one has to expect children? yes.  I just wish that parents would truly consider other adults in the parks and see that it's sometimes it's best to just go to Chefs de France or get a babysitter.  There is a very big part of me screaming to do whatever they want, but not on that evening in February while I'm there.
> 
> I really wish that there were one or two resteraunts that were no children allowed.  Or perhaps lounges that were truly no children allowed and that had a pretty full aray of food.  If adults are such a big part of the growing demographic of Disney, it would stand to reason that there might be room for one or two of those places.
> 
> 
> *chooses to live flame suit on, as to not have a death by admonishing*



As a parent I completely agree with you. There is no way I would bring my toddlers to a signature restaurant. I would maybe bring my 11 year old, but I would have to think long, hard and take into account her additude and demeanor that day. I think signature dining was set up for this purpose but some parents just don't care.


----------



## TKDisneylover

KirklandTutu said:


> I really wish that there were one or two resteraunts that were no children allowed.  Or perhaps lounges that were truly no children allowed and that had a pretty full aray of food.  If adults are such a big part of the growing demographic of Disney, it would stand to reason that there might be room for one or two of those places.



This would be wonderful!!  I agree 100%.


----------



## Poppinsme

kennancat said:


> I think this is very common. Just because somebody doesn't get all gooey about children doesn't mean that they are a bad parent. I've heard many people whom I consider to be good parents share this sentiment, especially given the way that some poor parents allow their children to behave these days. And by the way, it's "you're", not "your". Why can't the trolls spell?
> 
> Welcome to the thread, hopey1kenobi. Come and be judged with us evil childfree people



I'm not a troll. 
And I don't need an English lesson. (Oh and childfree is 2 words child free).  
I just was making a comment as I have posted here before as a childless person.  And I still think its odd.  Not calling her a bad parent or anything else.  For gods sake.  I take back what I said.   And no I don't think you hate your kids hopey1kenobi.
Glad your happy!
Peace.


----------



## tinker&belle

I just found this thread,I posted on it over a year ago. In that time, my husband and I had an accidental pregnancy (which miscarried) and after that we decided we wanted to try to have a child. We got pregnant the next cycle, which came as a huge suprise, we thought 'trying' was supposed to be a fun, long process. (DH was especially disappointed.) Anyway, this has been joyous for us, but I have other friends who are childless and when we talk I always say to enjoy what they have and only have a child if they really, really want one. We love ours to pieces, but on a good day I get a shower and get a chance to get my breastpump clean and ready for the next day.  I love my baby, and I wouldn't have it any other way, but I truly believe peope should only be parents if they DESIRE the huge commitment that goes with.


----------



## hopey1kenobi

tinker&belle said:


> We love ours to pieces, but on a good day I get a shower and get a chance to get my breastpump clean and ready for the next day.



Ha Ha Ha That is kind of like my day except for the breast pump it's the house completely picked up.


----------



## MapleGirl

You know it's kind of funny....  In normal life if I'm at a restaurant and a screaming kid is next to me I get very upset.  But in Disney World I don't really care.  In fact I can't remember ever seeing an upset kid a WDW!    I guess I block it out.  And I love seeing the kids dressed up and having the time of their lives with their parents.  Good times.  DH and I are heading back in Jan.  Can't wait!!!


----------



## kmmccart75

MapleGirl said:


> You know it's kind of funny....  In normal life if I'm at a restaurant and a screaming kid is next to me I get very upset.  But in Disney World I don't really care.  In fact I can't remember ever seeing an upset kid a WDW!    I guess I block it out.  And I love seeing the kids dressed up and having the time of their lives with their parents.  Good times.  DH and I are heading back in Jan.  Can't wait!!!



You've never seen an upset kid at Disney?  WOW, you are good at blocking them out!  As I posted earlier, all my husband and I need if we start doubting our CF decision is a trip there!  Don't get me wrong, we LOVE Disney, but man it seems like we are always surrounded by wailing, whiny, exhausted kids on the buses, in the lines, etc.  It makes us start doing our "no kids, no kids, lalalalalala" dance!  

However, I do agree that we don't seem to mind the cranky or out of control ones as much when we're in Disney though, probably because at least MOST places in Disney are at least appropriate for children.  Or maybe it's just like building up immunity.


----------



## Hixski

KirklandTutu said:


> *flame retardant suit on*
> 
> Everytime I see a post asking about wether or not it's ok to bring kids to Bistro de Paris, I want to scream 'NO'.  Why?  you may ask.  It has no kids menu, therefore that says to me in gentle Disney-speak that this is the one place that adults can look at and breathe easy and not have to even think that there might be one screaming child.  Am I a bad person because of this?  no.  Do I understand that it's Disney and one has to expect children? yes.  I just wish that parents would truly consider other adults in the parks and see that it's sometimes it's best to just go to Chefs de France or get a babysitter.  There is a very big part of me screaming to do whatever they want, but not on that evening in February while I'm there.
> 
> I really wish that there were one or two resteraunts that were no children allowed.  Or perhaps lounges that were truly no children allowed and that had a pretty full aray of food.  If adults are such a big part of the growing demographic of Disney, it would stand to reason that there might be room for one or two of those places.
> 
> 
> *chooses to live flame suit on, as to not have a death by admonishing*




I started a thread over a year ago about an adult only restaurant or 2. Most people said they would love it. Of course, there were still the parents that said they would not like it. But for the most part I would say 80% of the people said they would love it. Some had kids and were coming without them and of course would have welcomed some non screaming restaurants. 

Here is the link in case anyone would like to see. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1188145


----------



## MapleGirl

kmmccart75 said:


> You've never seen an upset kid at Disney?  WOW, you are good at blocking them out!  As I posted earlier, all my husband and I need if we start doubting our CF decision is a trip there!  Don't get me wrong, we LOVE Disney, but man it seems like we are always surrounded by wailing, whiny, exhausted kids on the buses, in the lines, etc.  It makes us start doing our "no kids, no kids, lalalalalala" dance!



I know!!  I know there _must_ be screaming children everywhere, (heck, there have been times where I'm so tired and sick of walking around that _I_ want to have a temper tantrum.... but it passes)  but I just can't remember ever seeing any!  

And we love the "no kids" dance!!   
Woo adults!!! Woo happy childless couples!!!  Power to the people! 

Ok, back to the Bruins vs. Senators game.  Go B's!!!


----------



## tinker&belle

hopey1kenobi said:


> Ha Ha Ha That is kind of like my day except for the breast pump it's the house completely picked up.



The house picked up is part of my long-term plan...we're still in survival mode...these are my new goals and objectives....


----------



## TXTurtles

tinker&belle said:


> The house picked up is part of my long-term plan...we're still in survival mode...these are my new goals and objectives....



 Heck, having the house picked up is part of _my_ long-term plan!  And I don't even have an infant to blame.  Maybe my fish ... nah.  Fortunately grad school makes a good scapegoat for any and all negligences around the house.  Though I'm not certain that a child wouldn't be both cheaper and less demanding than a degree!

On the other hand I got roped into working nursery for an event this morning and left VERY certain that I want to be in the CF group - I was watching the _sweetest_ girls, age 5, 7, and 9 and I was still counting the moments 'til it was done.  The 5 year old even crawled into my lap and cuddled into me while we watched a movie and, while it was touching, I was still glad to go home to my very quiet apartment where no one is tagging after me asking to be entertained.  I'm impressed with those who do count the cost and have children, despite the sacrifices and discipline it takes.  I'm also certain that I'll be admiring that group from afar!


----------



## KirklandTutu

Hixski said:


> I started a thread over a year ago about an adult only restaurant or 2. Most people said they would love it. Of course, there were still the parents that said they would not like it. But for the most part I would say 80% of the people said they would love it. Some had kids and were coming without them and of course would have welcomed some non screaming restaurants.
> 
> Here is the link in case anyone would like to see. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1188145



Thank you for sharing that.  

DH and I tend to eat in the bars of resteraunts as opposed to the seating area proper.  There are many places in our area who have reserved seating in the lounge area.  I work with kids, when I'm not at work I tend to want to not be around them and feel more free to just be an adult.  It would be nice if Disney had this sort of set up.  Most of the sit down places have attached bars anyway, they're just not 21 and up in order to stand in the room.  That's all I want, just the lounge where I can order at least from a limited menu.  Most places elsewhere don't let people under 21 in the bar anyway.


----------



## zima-cheryl

MapleGirl said:


> Ok, back to the Bruins vs. Senators game.  Go B's!!!



MapleGirl - I'd assume you were a Leaf's fan?

Well - the B's lost in OT today, but hey - that is at least 1 point, & they beat Ottowa the other night.

DH & I have tix for the 12/31 game!  Limo to/from & the whole nine yards!  
 
Should be an awesome day!


----------



## honugirl

I would welcome restaurants that were adult only at WDW. In fact, even if they cost more, I would probably patronize them for most of my vacation.

Truly, I'm not a kid person. There are a few I can handle for short bursts of time, a couple of hours or so, mostly my relative or friends kids. But I love Disney stuff and shouldn't have to be penalized constantly by parents that think their little wonderful, fantastic beings should accompany them EVERYWHERE! 

You can't even go to Las Vegas or Key West anymore without running into children everywhere. The one time I went to a Broadway play had a kid scream in the middle of it. Can't we just have a few places that are for adults only?

I'm still voting for "adults only" EMH in one of the parks during the more down seasons. I think it would be great. They could pair it up with regular EMH in one of the other parks so the families would have somewhere to go, but leave the adults one park at least a week to play and be kids.


----------



## MapleGirl

zima-cheryl said:


> MapleGirl - I'd assume you were a Leaf's fan?
> 
> Well - the B's lost in OT today, but hey - that is at least 1 point, & they beat Ottowa the other night.
> 
> DH & I have tix for the 12/31 game!  Limo to/from & the whole nine yards!
> 
> Should be an awesome day!



Nope, Boston Bruins all the way!  Last night's game was good (but not quite good enough!).  Ottowa is best in the division, so I don't feel too badly.  It sounds like you'll have a great time at the game!!  Go B's!

PS.  Didn't Ottowa win Saturday too?


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> MapleGirl - I'd assume you were a Leaf's fan?
> 
> Well - the B's lost in OT today, but hey - that is at least 1 point, & they beat Ottowa the other night.
> 
> DH & I have tix for the 12/31 game!  Limo to/from & the whole nine yards!
> 
> Should be an awesome day!



Hey Zima and Maplegirl- speaking of Hockey! One of my favorite subjects (after JD of course!) We played Boston on 10/27. I thought it was great the way they pushed up the time so the baseball fans can watch the game! (The Flyers won by the way )  

I am bringing this up- b/c it is certainly NOT OT from the CF subject! 

A few years ago I worked with a girl who was also a Flyers FA-REAK like me- the best part- we shared an office and talked Flyers all the time. I remember having conversations about HOW in the world can someone be a hockey fan (ie- a fan that can only take a potty break during commercials, there must but be NO talking while the game is on, and screams at the TV non stop ) AND HAVE KIDS!????  What if they cry or want attention while the game is on! We were dead serious! 

Who wants kids- not to mention, who wants kids during hockey season! 

IMHO- kids get in the way of fun 

One reason I just LOVE hockey- take a looksie at the Flyers Capt after being hit in the face by a stick while playing Montreal! He went and got stitched up and he got right back on the ice! OK- we lost the game but I love seeing this kind of heart in a game!

Now THAT'S a hockey player! He is my _"other"_ Capt! 





OH and PS Zima- My ALL TIME FAVORITE cutie used to play for Boston- Dan McGillis- OMG! That man would drive me NUTS just looking at him.....not to mention the hits he would throw on people at center ice were unbelievable!!!

It stinks that with the "new hockey" Dan just is not needed to throw around his weight anymore!

How about all of this BS!!!! with the suspensions! This is utterly ridiculous- when a player smashes someone into the boards- it is NOT their intention to knock them out cold! It is just called HOCKEY PEOPLE!  

Me and Mom (she is also a hockey freak) were talking about how they are pinning the name BACK onto the Flyers, The Broad Street Bullies (that is what they used to call us WAAAYY back when, when the fights would include the whole bench, and not to mention THE FANS ONLY IN PHILLY!) I told mom- the only reason they are saying we are "rough" is b/c the stupid rules are getting to tough on people who do the hitting! We could have put the same hit on someone 2 years ago and nothing would have happened.....

for %$#@'s sake- EVEN HOCKEY IS NOW GETTING PC! How disgusting is THAT!


----------



## ChisJo

On a different topic (not to take away from the hockey talk Hatt, but Flyers? Really??? Yikes....Go Habs!), anyways, has anyone ever been to WDW when Pop Warner was there? I just found out that 1000's of extra children are going to be there at the Sports complex when we venture that way, and I want to know if it makes an impact on the parks at all....any input would be greatly appreciated....


----------



## zima-cheryl

MapleGirl said:


> PS.  Didn't Ottowa win Saturday too?



MapleGirl - you are right, I must have been confused w/the Buffalo score from earlier in the week.

I'm actually a Bruins fan by marriage (Red Sox & Patriots too - Welcome To Title Town!   )  

At heart I'm a Thrashers fan - have been since they picked up Milan Hnilicka as their goalie a few years back.  He is gone, but I stayed a fan.
We have season tix to the Hartford Wolf*Pack (AHL) ... couldn't afford season tix for the big boys!  But we get in a couple B's games each year.  

And Hatter - I have to agree, I don't see how families do it!?!  First of all even the minor league games are a small fortune - if you have 2 or 3 kids how do you afford it.   

And then you get to the game & the kids are all over.  Crying for junk food, bawling if they don't get a shirt or to see the mascot (or crying 'cause they are scared of the mascot) they don't understand the game and many are too young to understand & sit for 2 1/2 hours.  

We sit near 2 families w/very well behaved kids - but they really work at it and often end up leaving in the 2nd period.  Unfortunately they are the exception to the rule.  I always try to complement them & give the benefit of the doubt on the rare occasion they do act up, because I appreciate that 99% of the time they are such good parents & as a result have such nice kids.

Nope, just not for me - biggest kid we have to worry about is me!  I prefer being able to afford tix (and the occasional limo ride) and being able to have a beer or two at the game and not being pestered and distracted.  I want to enjoy the game and relax!


----------



## zima-cheryl

ChisJo said:


> On a different topic (not to take away from the hockey talk Hatt, but Flyers? Really??? Yikes....Go Habs!), anyways, has anyone ever been to WDW when Pop Warner was there? I just found out that 1000's of extra children are going to be there at the Sports complex when we venture that way, and I want to know if it makes an impact on the parks at all....any input would be greatly appreciated....



Don't know what this is worth, but I listen to the WDW Today podcast & they have talked about this before.  

According to them the Pop Warner will increase crowds at the resort, but not so much at the parks.  They are busy w/their activities & not really in the parks much.  

That said, take it for what it is worth.  One of the 4 guys does work for the "Unofficial Guide" _ding_ 
(Sorry you have to listen to the podcast to get that joke)  
but none of them are official Disney employees.

Hope it helps.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> And Hatter - I have to agree, I don't see how families do it!?!  First of all even the minor league games are a small fortune - if you have 2 or 3 kids how do you afford it.



OMG Zima!  I TOTALLY did not explain myself very well! With the hockey/kid thing!

I meant- just watching the game on TV! I would not be able to have kids b/c it would infringe upon my hockey watching on TV!! The kids (especially toddlers) would need some kind of attention from me and forget it while I am watching hockey- you are on your own 

AND- The whole hockey and families thing! Don't get me started on THAT! 

I know here in Philly (NJ) we have sold out games almost every game- I can be sitting in the crowd and watching a family with their kids- who are TOTALLY being annoying! They want something to eat, go to the bathroom etc etc- KIDS CAN CARE LESS ABOUT HOCKEY PARENTS! You are hogging up valuable seat space for hockey fans who could not get a darn ticket! And the rest of us are trying to watch the game while your kid kicks the back of my seat! HELLLOOO! THANK goodness we have the rule here- that you cannot get up from your seat until the whistle blows! There would be parents taking their kids out for food every 10 seconds!

PS- and CrisJo- _DON'T_ be trash talking my team! 

The only team I say stinks is the Devils, but only b/c they are our "turnpike rivals" and it is just something PA/NJ fans do to torture each other! Heck, I go to Devils games with my cousin b/c he is a Devils fan, and I wear my Flyers jersey and vice versa- even when we got out places we wear our jerseys- people love to stir up some crap then! 

I can say the Devils stink b/c I AM from Jersey You know how THAT works.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> And then you get to the game & the kids are all over.  Crying for junk food, bawling if they don't get a shirt or to see the mascot (or crying 'cause they are scared of the mascot)



and that is another hockey pet peeve of mine~~~ Mascots!  UGH! The Flyers do not have a mascot- thank GOODNESS! Our AHL team does. 

But to me, a mascot= kids. There are tons of kids at the AHL games- it is nauseating. I feel like I am at a gradeschool pep rally or something! 

I kind of feel bad for the team- IMHO- it diminishes what they are doing- playing real freaking hockey- not putting on a toddler show by hitting around a puck! I know the teams are really into helping children's charities etc- but, for me as a serious fan- in no, way, shape or form, do I want the *game* of hockey to be associated with kiddies!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> and that is another hockey pet peeve of mine~~~ Mascots!  UGH! The Flyers do not have a mascot- thank GOODNESS! Our AHL team does.



Hey!  The Wolf*Pack booster club has done overnight trips to Philly to see our boys play the Phantoms!  Small world.
And I know what you mean - that Phantom mascot is pretty freaky!  Some poor college kid getting minimum to run around in that outfit.  Wages don't pay for the therapy he/she will need from the humiliation of the outfit!
 

And I have to confess... my DH gets a real kick out of the crying kids.  He gets this smirk on his face every time Sonar (a big, freaky looking, wolf like thing) gets close to a kid & the kid starts to cry.  He is a bad, bad man!
 

And he is an equal opportunity guy here...he laughed at our niece (just 2 years old) when we were at WDW & she would freak out over the characters.


----------



## Hixski

Here in St. Louis the true fans 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




 bleed BLUE!!!

We have a new mascot this year!! My first reaction was "ugh," but the Blues are definitely making a push to win fans back so..... here is a pictue of the mascot. Please don't anyone laugh.


----------



## MapleGirl

> And I have to confess... my DH gets a real kick out of the crying kids.  He gets this smirk on his face every time Sonar (a big, freaky looking, wolf like thing) gets close to a kid & the kid starts to cry.  He is a bad, bad man!



 DH and I are the same way.   It's back to the "No Kids, no kids, la la la la la" dance!   

The Bruins big rival are the Canadiens.   Boo!  Hiss!!!  

Looks like we need a Disney-Hockey Fan thread!


----------



## MapleGirl

>



You know, I'm digging the new Blues Mascot.  I am all about the music!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Here in St. Louis the true fans
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> bleed BLUE!!!
> 
> We have a new mascot this year!! My first reaction was "ugh," but the Blues are definitely making a push to win fans back so..... here is a pictue of the mascot. Please don't anyone laugh.



I am more about getting the game BACK to the way it used to be! THAT is what the fans really want- more hitting and fighting, less lame calls! 

I do not see how a stuffed mascot will bring fans back- (Hix- not laughing at your mascot ) who wants a crowd full of people bringing their kids to see a mascot!? Like I said- SO glad the Flyers do not have one. 

99.9% of the adults want to see old fashioned hockey back! The league needs to lay off a bit, no, I take that back, they need to lay off A LOT!

You know what else I do not like- when the announcer tells you who scored at the game and it sounds like a bad DJ making a goofy announcement!  all "wacky" and crap. I guess Ed Snyder does not like that type of "goofy" stuff at his NHL games. I do hear it on the TV when we are playing an away game at some places. BLECK- That is the sound of me puking.  

The only people I want to be entertaining me- are the players! I don't need that other %^&T!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> I am more about getting the game BACK to the way it used to be! THAT is what the fans really want- more hitting and fighting, less lame calls!
> 
> I do not see how a stuffed mascot will bring fans back- (Hix- not laughing at your mascot ) who wants a crowd full of people bringing their kids to see a mascot!? Like I said- SO glad the Flyers do not have one.
> 
> 99.9% of the adults want to see old fashioned hockey back! The league needs to lay off a bit, no, I take that back, they need to lay off A LOT!
> 
> You know what else I do not like- when the announcer tells you who scored at the game and it sounds like a bad DJ making a goofy announcement!  all "wacky" and crap. I guess Ed Snyder does not like that type of "goofy" stuff at his NHL games. I do hear it on the TV when we are playing an away game at some places. BLECK- That is the sound of me puking.
> 
> The only people I want to be entertaining me- are the players! I don't need that other %^&T!



That mascot does not even have a name yet so far as I know. DH though he read that they were going to have a naming contest for the kids. God help us.....they will probably pick Fluffy or Bluey or some other ridiculous name and I will have to hide my head in shame.

I am all for hockey in the good old days!!! I LOVE a good fight!!!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> That mascot does not even have a name yet so far as I know. DH though he read that they were going to have a naming contest for the kids. God help us.....they will probably pick Fluffy or Bluey or some other ridiculous name and I will have to hide my head in shame.
> 
> I am all for hockey in the good old days!!! I LOVE a good fight!!!!!



How original is _name that mascot_!


----------



## danv3

kmmccart75 said:


> You've never seen an upset kid at Disney?  WOW, you are good at blocking them out!  As I posted earlier, all my husband and I need if we start doubting our CF decision is a trip there!  Don't get me wrong, we LOVE Disney, but man it seems like we are always surrounded by wailing, whiny, exhausted kids on the buses, in the lines, etc.  It makes us start doing our "no kids, no kids, lalalalalala" dance!



Long time lurker on this thread, child-free by choice.

DW and I are just back from a quick trip to the world and boy is this post right on!  Some people ask why we'd go to WDW without kids, but after the last four days, I have to wonder why anyone would go to WDW *with* kids!


----------



## honugirl

Excuse me, but there is no team but the NJ Devils, thank you very much! I would skate to the ends of the earth to see Marty play. I just bought myself a new goalie mask and it's an exact replica of his. If it wasn't so doggone heavy I'd wear it to the game I'm going to against Vancouver (it's the only time they're coming to Vancouver all season... doh!). 

Another reason not to have kids, I'd never get any new hockey gear! I just spent almost $800 on new goalie pants, chest protector, and skates. Man, I love being single!


----------



## maddhatir

honugirl said:


> Excuse me, but there is no team but the NJ Devils, thank you very much! I would skate to the ends of the earth to see Marty play. I just bought myself a new goalie mask and it's an exact replica of his. If it wasn't so doggone heavy I'd wear it to the game I'm going to against Vancouver (it's the only time they're coming to Vancouver all season... doh!).



Were you originally from NJ and moved to Wash State! 

Man! That would stink not to see your favorite team play! I HOPE you can get the games on satellite or something-  That is what I tell DH- IF we move- how am I going to watch the Flyers!- you will need to get me satellite- or else I am staying PUT! 

Guess what?- I may have posted this here before, I forget- But to show what a good sport I am - Me and DH drove to North Jersey to go to the Devils parking lot celebration when they won the Stanley Cup in 1995! ( we went with my cousin, the Devils fan) I say parking lot celebration b/c no one took the team that serious back then- they did not get a parade, it was some stupid thing in the parking lot. 

I also think I may have posted pics here last year when he got married- the minister presented my cousin and his bride NJ Devils gifts on the alter for everyone to see. AND! Wait until you hear THIS!......

Both of their wedding bands......have the NJ Devils logo etched into them- no diamonds- just NJ Devils!

He also has the NJ Devils logo "inlaid" into his hardwood floors in the living room. All the furnite is red and black! Both of his cars HAD to be red, and for as long as I can remember, when he signs his name, he incorporates the Devils logo into it at the end- he does it so quickly now b/c he has done it for so long!

I admit- Marty has GOT to be the best goalie in the league....OK maybe the world.....but I am hoping the name Marty will give us some luck with our new goalie, Marty Biron! 

I KNOW we lost to the Rangers last night- but he is still someone to watch!


----------



## kmmccart75

danv3 said:


> Long time lurker on this thread, child-free by choice.
> 
> DW and I are just back from a quick trip to the world and boy is this post right on!  Some people ask why we'd go to WDW without kids, but after the last four days, I have to wonder why anyone would go to WDW *with* kids!



Well said danv3, and welcome!  I think my little "no kids, no kids, lalalalalala" dance may just catch on!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> Were you originally from NJ and moved to Wash State!
> 
> Man! That would stink not to see your favorite team play! I HOPE you can get the games on satellite or something-  That is what I tell DH- IF we move- how am I going to watch the Flyers!- you will need to get me satellite- or else I am staying PUT!
> 
> .......
> 
> I admit- Marty has GOT to be the best goalie in the league....OK maybe the world.....but I am hoping the name Marty will give us some luck with our new goalie, Marty Biron!
> 
> I KNOW we lost to the Rangers last night- but he is still someone to watch!



Direct TV Center Ice!  Gets you every game out there, except of course the local ones that get blacked out.  That is how I keep up w/my Thrashers.  Plus we enjoy watching a few other teams that our AHL guys have graduated to.  Is there anything on in prime time besides hockey &/or baseball?
 

And I'll second Hatir...Marty is the best there is.  
 
You have to appreciate seeing what he does...even if you aren't a Devil's fan.


----------



## KirklandTutu

off topic or on topic?  not hockey-related...

thought and observation over things recently read...

It's a good thing that I don't  want kids, I'd end up having a nervous break down over nothing more than food.  I'm just one of those who thinks kids should stay away from refined sugar and trans fats, and should try to eat alot of veggies and try new things while staying away from general junk food.  Going to Disney would give me an ulcer.  

I think I'm one of those people who if they were to be a parent would be one of those 'perfect parents', but at the expense of my own happiness and general well being.


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> off topic or on topic?  not hockey-related...
> 
> thought and observation over things recently read...
> 
> It's a good thing that I don't  want kids, I'd end up having a nervous break down over nothing more than food.  I'm just one of those who thinks kids should stay away from refined sugar and trans fats, and should try to eat alot of veggies and try new things while staying away from general junk food.  Going to Disney would give me an ulcer.
> 
> I think I'm one of those people who if they were to be a parent would be one of those 'perfect parents', but at the expense of my own happiness and general well being.



My niece is like that with her 2yr old son. All natural, no sugar etc- UNTIL! He comes to family functions and he has his UNCLES slipping him some candy- cake etc. She used to get mad, now she just throws up her arms. The more she yells, the more they give him. It is hopeless! But that is not that often they see him- so she keeps to her all natural diet most of the time. 

and get this-- we went out with BIL, SIL, my niece I mentioned above and a few acquaintances Trick or Treating.

My DH had a goofy clown mask on and was just walking around. My niece (5) was dressed as Tinkerbell. Well she would come running back with her candy and DH would put his mask on her and tell her to go back for more candy- she looked so stinking cute (and disturbing all at the same time ) dressed as a fairy with a bizarre clown mask on......anyway- she would come running back saying "I got double candy!" well, after a few times of this- THE MOMS! had to voice their disappointment in DH that he was teaching her bad habits! and they were dead serious!  

UGH! He was just having fun!


----------



## nurse.darcy

I praise anyone who decides in this day and age not to have children.  It is a difficult decision to be sure, but one that will reap major rewards in the end. . .


----------



## mistygapa

I read the original post and thought there for a minute that I must have written it!

DH and I are in our late 30s and have no plans to physically have children.  We enjoy our 4 cats and 2 dogs and enjoy the very little down time we have just doing selfish stuff alone or with the pets - art stuff for DH, bubble baths for me, etc.

We may one day decide to adopt a child.  When people hear that, they automatically assume that since we are "older" and have no children now, that something is wrong with us.  Honestly, we have no idea if we could or could not have children because it's never even been a thought.  If one day we do decide to adopt, it will be because there are already enough kids out there who need good homes.  I would feel horribly guilty bringing another one into the world when there are perfect ones already here.  DH told this to a colleague one day and his response was "yeah, but don't you want your OWN kid?"  Uhh, yeah, if we adopted a child it would be our "own".  People also don't understand that not everyone adopts because they can't have children.  Some adopt just because they want to give a loving home to a deserving child.  That will be the case if and when we decide.

For whatever reason, some people just have a hard time grasping the idea that some of us choose to be childless.  I personally would have a hard time having a child now, knowing I was leaving them in a horribly unstable and unsafe world.

 I for one support anyone's decision to not have kids.  I think it's very commendable to not just cave in to society's expectations, especially of a married couple.


----------



## danv3

Marty didn't look so hot last night!  Go Pens!  

(Seriously, though, he's one of the best.)


----------



## zima-cheryl

Woo Hoo - my Thrashers pulled out an OT win last night!


----------



## zima-cheryl

mistygapa said:


> his response was "yeah, but don't you want your OWN kid?"  Uhh, yeah, if we adopted a child it would be our "own".



You are so right - my brother has a blended family (some biological & some adopted) and each and every one of those children are "Ours"! No one even thinks about it any more really.

There is no difference between the children - each one gets spoiled rotten, hopped up on sugar & sent home to Dad & Mom!


----------



## MapleGirl

A while back we were talking about having child-free restaurants.  Is V&A's such a restaurant?  What about the Chef's Table?  DH and I have not eaten there yet, but I'm sure we will get to it at some point.  

I'm always joking that _if_ eek DH and I have children, we would have to put our Disney trips on hold until they grow up and go to college!


----------



## MapleGirl

zima-cheryl said:


> Woo Hoo - my Thrashers pulled out an OT win last night!



The Bruins are playing the Sabres tonight.... GO B's!!!!!! Timmy Thomas is the man!!!


----------



## TXTurtles

mistygapa said:


> We may one day decide to adopt a child.  When people hear that, they automatically assume that since we are "older" and have no children now, that something is wrong with us.  Honestly, we have no idea if we could or could not have children because it's never even been a thought.  If one day we do decide to adopt, it will be because there are already enough kids out there who need good homes.  I would feel horribly guilty bringing another one into the world when there are perfect ones already here.  DH told this to a colleague one day and his response was "yeah, but don't you want your OWN kid?"  Uhh, yeah, if we adopted a child it would be our "own".  People also don't understand that not everyone adopts because they can't have children.  Some adopt just because they want to give a loving home to a deserving child.  That will be the case if and when we decide.



Are you my long lost twin?    DH and I are the same - the few times we talk about what we'd do with a kid (usually after I've come very close to strangling one of the kids I work with) it's always prefixed with "in the case of accident or adoption..."  When we get asked about our future family (and since when was that considered acceptable small talk?  Seriously, drop it unless you want to be asked how much you weigh) we'll mention that we might adopt someday and the responses you get ... they range from really positive to (especially in the case of my parents) more along the lines of "you don't know where those kids have _been_."  Right.  I just don't get why it's considered so novel - if we want a kid and a kid out there wants parents... why would we go with a biological kid?  I know some people like the idea of seeing pieces of themselves in their kids - personally that's exactly what I DON'T want to see!  I remember what I was like as a kid and that alone is enough to make me CF for life!

This is all, of course, assuming that my days working with small ones don't leave me with PTSD.  And that we someday have a change of heart about being parents.  And get more patience.

Maybe we'll just enjoy our nieces and nephews.


----------



## Hixski

MapleGirl said:


> A while back we were talking about having child-free restaurants.  Is V&A's such a restaurant?  What about the Chef's Table?  DH and I have not eaten there yet, but I'm sure we will get to it at some point.
> 
> I'm always joking that _if_ eek DH and I have children, we would have to put our Disney trips on hold until they grow up and go to college!



You can take children into V&A's. They don't have a childrens menu so that would be a hint that they are trying to keep it adults only even if they are not stating it that way. But you can take them in.

As for waiting till children grow up and go to college for a Disney trip......   Don't even joke about something like that. You should wash your mouth out with soap!!!!


----------



## MapleGirl

Hixski said:


> You can take children into V&A's. They don't have a childrens menu so that would be a hint that they are trying to keep it adults only even if they are not stating it that way. But you can take them in.
> 
> As for waiting till children grow up and go to college for a Disney trip......   Don't even joke about something like that. You should wash your mouth out with soap!!!!



You're right, I could never wait 18 years between Disney trips.  I guess we would have to find a babysitter! 

Just kidding.... I think we'll just remain happily child-free and enjoy our yearly trips.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Hixski said:


> You can take children into V&A's. They don't have a childrens menu so that would be a hint that they are trying to keep it adults only even if they are not stating it that way. But you can take them in.



If the lack of a children's menu doesn't keep the # of kids down the cost certainly would!  I don't want to even think about how much dinner for 4 or 5 people would be there... esp. @ the chef's table!


----------



## ChisJo

do any of you CF couples ever do the character dinners? We were thinking of going to one when we go down there, and truly the only one he would consider is Chef Mickeys - do you think we're crazy?


----------



## KirklandTutu

DH and I will do the character dinners, but not on purpose.  For instance, we really really like to eat at Cinderella's Royal Table or Arials Grotto in DL, it just happens to have characters.  I don't do so well with characters, they start doing their thing, then I start giggling and laughing because I find the whole thing silly.  Now, I like silly, but being face to face with silly puts me into a laughing fit.  I always think that I have to say something witty to them, but it always comes out awkward and I feel like kicking myself.  

Maybe it's because I know people who were face characters and know on a very real level that there are true people underneath those pounds of makeup.  I just want to up the conversation level a bit, but I just get stupid.

Last time at Ariels Grotto (granted I had had a cocktail upstairs before the glass of wine at dinner), I proclaimed to Belle that she was DHs favorite as he 'likes those readin types'.  She did a great job playing along, got that 'ohhhh' look on her face that all the princesses do so well, and gave him a big ol kiss on his bald head.

You can't see it, but there's a v. clear pair of lipstick lips on top of that dome


----------



## honugirl

Ha ha ha ha. No, I didn't move from NJ to WA. I'm hoping to go the other way WA to NJ in the next couple of years. When I first started playing goal about 9 or so years ago someone said I looked like Brodeaur a bit and it stuck, he's been my fave goalie ever since. Although I have had small crushes on other guys: Eddie the Eagle Belfour, Mike Richter (still have some of his sticks that I use), Ron Hextall, you get the idea. I'm more of a fan of goalies than I am teams.


----------



## honugirl

Ok, so my man Marty's not having such a great season yet. He just needs me to show up in Vancouver next month with a copy of his mask on with my Devil's jersey and cheer him on.   

I think it's been hard on the team because they didn't start their home games until just recently, like two weeks ago because the stadium hadn't been opened by Bon Jovi yet. Sigh. It's hard to have to constantly be on the road. 

Unfortunately I don't get to do much hockey watching right now. Too many medical tests and stuff and too tired to care. It really sucks. I really miss playing right now. Oddly enough, I even miss reffing, well I should say I miss reffing the kids games (I get to break up more fights, the hockey is better than adult crap). As much as I want to go up to Vancouver next month, reality may set in and I may not be able to go.


----------



## TKDisneylover

ChisJo said:


> do any of you CF couples ever do the character dinners? We were thinking of going to one when we go down there, and truly the only one he would consider is Chef Mickeys - do you think we're crazy?



Our first character meal was by accident, we had been to WDW with my best friend and her family (2 kids) and we did not have ADR's but just happened upon one at Hollywood & Vine at Disney MGM-Studios with Minnie, Pluto, Chip & Dale & Goofy.  Their attention was more on the children, but that was okay with us, but they did stop for photo ops and it was actually fun.  This time around we purposely booked one at 'Ohana's at the Polynesian resort because it was Lilo & Stitch with Mickey & friends.  I'm a big Mickey fan and I also wanted to try the Tonga Toast that everyone keeps raving about.  So I have the opportunity to get both with this character meal.  We're also doing Restaurant Marrakesh in World Showcase at EPCOT, it's not a character meal but DH is looking forward to seeing the bellydancer! 



KirklandTutu said:


> You can't see it, but there's a v. clear pair of lipstick lips on top of that dome



VERY cute!  Love the look on his face!


----------



## zima-cheryl

ChisJo said:


> do any of you CF couples ever do the character dinners? We were thinking of going to one when we go down there, and truly the only one he would consider is Chef Mickeys - do you think we're crazy?



Absolutely Go!  
My favorite is Crystal Palace!  I love Pooh & Piglet  

We go & play it up w/the characters and get lots of pictures.  The handlers always make sure they get to our table and that we get our pictures.  And they are so fun to interact with!  

Go for it!  And have fun!


----------



## maddhatir

honugirl said:


> I think it's been hard on the team because they didn't start their home games until just recently, like two weeks ago because the stadium hadn't been opened by Bon Jovi yet. Sigh. It's hard to have to constantly be on the road.



A few weeks back I e-mailed by cousin (the Devils fan) to bust on him about where the new venue was going to be--- Welcome to beautiful....Newark   He then asked me and DH if we wanted to go to a game to see the new place......ahhhh, no thanks. I will stay out of Newark at all costs. Well, except to maybe catch a plane!


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Just got back from the closing of F&W (yes that makes two trips this year to it) and I found Figment!!!   Nobody was there with him.  I now have about thirty pictures of me and Figment.  That poor character I was just way too "relaxed" for my own good.  I promise it's not off-topic since we decided last minute to go and as we were leaving DH said "we couldn't do this with kids."

I still will get in line to take pics with the characters.  Will I ever see any of these people ever again? Probably not, so go have fun, enjoy character meals and don't feel like a fruit for liking character events.


----------



## ChisJo

well....we were thinking of going to a character dinner, but then I couldn't get a PS for the nights we were thinking....so then I asked on the boards if we went a little later if anybody thought we could get a table without a PS - I know it's a good thing to have one, but we are going during the SLOW season, and someone pretty much said don't even waste your time....so, I guess that answers my question....we won't waste our time... 

I was actually kind of looking forward to it....I would've really like to do it, but wasn't sure about DBF - so oh well...thanks everyone for the encouragement to go....I would have really liked to try it with him!


----------



## Rozzie

Character Dinners? Yup!  Character breakfast? Yup!  We do it all.  We love our characters.  

Can I vent just for a second?  I know most of ya'll will understand where I am coming from.  I am working Christmas this year, okay I can live with that, I am a RN and it comes with the paycheck.  But what has bothered me is the reasoning....we have a new manager, who is very "kid" oriented, and scheduled everyone with kids off Christmas, and those without to work.  Her reasoning, we "don't have kids so we don't need the day off".  WTH? When does my DH and dogs and mother not count as family?

Sometimes it would be worth my while to hang a bunch of pics of unknown children on my locker just to get a holiday off.


----------



## druidia

Rozzie said:


> Can I vent just for a second?  I know most of ya'll will understand where I am coming from.  I am working Christmas this year, okay I can live with that, I am a RN and it comes with the paycheck.  But what has bothered me is the reasoning....we have a new manager, who is very "kid" oriented, and scheduled everyone with kids off Christmas, and those without to work.  Her reasoning, we "don't have kids so we don't need the day off".  WTH? When does my DH and dogs and mother not count as family?
> 
> Sometimes it would be worth my while to hang a bunch of pics of unknown children on my locker just to get a holiday off.




Oh, now that would burn my britches!!!   Even if I don't have kids, I do still have DH, parents, a brother, and the rest of our families to spend time with!  ARGH!


----------



## maddhatir

Rozzie said:


> Character Dinners? Yup!  Character breakfast? Yup!  We do it all.  We love our characters.
> 
> Can I vent just for a second?  I know most of ya'll will understand where I am coming from.  I am working Christmas this year, okay I can live with that, I am a RN and it comes with the paycheck.  But what has bothered me is the reasoning....we have a new manager, who is very "kid" oriented, and scheduled everyone with kids off Christmas, and those without to work.  Her reasoning, we "don't have kids so we don't need the day off".  WTH? When does my DH and dogs and mother not count as family?
> 
> Sometimes it would be worth my while to hang a bunch of pics of unknown children on my locker just to get a holiday off.



Whoa! Is that even legal!!? Would that be considered discrimination?

What happens if some of those people do not even celebrate xmas!? How the HECK does she know who and who does not celebrate!?

OMG- I am speechless! and I want to throw up!


----------



## Poppinsme

Rozzie said:


> Character Dinners? Yup!  Character breakfast? Yup!  We do it all.  We love our characters.
> 
> Can I vent just for a second?  I know most of ya'll will understand where I am coming from.  I am working Christmas this year, okay I can live with that, I am a RN and it comes with the paycheck.  But what has bothered me is the reasoning....we have a new manager, who is very "kid" oriented, and scheduled everyone with kids off Christmas, and those without to work.  Her reasoning, we "don't have kids so we don't need the day off".  WTH? When does my DH and dogs and mother not count as family?
> 
> Sometimes it would be worth my while to hang a bunch of pics of unknown children on my locker just to get a holiday off.



Ah yes same problem with me.  I'm an RRT that works NICU/PICU and always gets the " But you don't have kids".    And my co-workers with kids thinks I should trade with them so they can be with there kids.  Well I have traded over the years and bought there candy and other crap they sell for school but NO more.  I just went agency and its the best thing Ive ever done!  No more holidays unless I want them.  And the next time they come to me with buying a candy bar for (insert whatever) I am going to say my horse needs a new halter can they give ME money for that?  I don't think its being mean because I have been giving now for 30 years and have had enough.  And yes I love children.


----------



## maddhatir

Poppinsme said:


> Ah yes same problem with me.  I'm an RRT that works NICU/PICU and always gets the " But you don't have kids".    And my co-workers with kids thinks I should trade with them so they can be with there kids.  Well I have traded over the years and bought there candy and other crap they sell for school but NO more.  I just went agency and its the best thing Ive ever done!  No more holidays unless I want them.  And the next time they come to me with buying a candy bar for (insert whatever) I am going to say my horse needs a new halter can they give ME money for that?  I don't think its being mean because I have been giving now for 30 years and have had enough.  And yes I love children.



You know- one of my co-workers started doing this!

I work from home- but I go to my office once a week to pick up/drop off work etc. The past 2 times I have been there- She asked me if I want to buy things b/c her kid is selling them for soccer or whatever little sport she plays!

Of course, I feel bad, so I say OK- it has cost me over 30.00 bucks so far. Sure- I now have a cheesecake for Thanksgiving dessert But still!

I am going to have to start saying, no thank you- or else WHO knows what else I may end up with! I should tell her, well, the 15.00 bucks I would give you for that 100lb candy bar was going to go towards some real food at the grocery store!

I can buy my own food products thank you


----------



## KirklandTutu

My excuse is that I'm a teacher and only buy fundraising items from my students.  Fortunatly, hardly any of my students ever hit me up.  I do get upset if they don't try to sell my girl scout cookies, though, as I say no to every other girl scout that I see.


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> I do get upset if they don't try to sell my girl scout cookies, though, as I say no to every other girl scout that I see.



OMG! I breaks my heart when those little girls are at the cookie table and they all harmonize "Do you wanna buy some cookies?"

I feel SO bad- DH is a SOB- you know what he does- he tells them to ask me and he walks away b/c he feels too bad to say no! 

I usually say- "_Nooooo thank you sweetieeeee_" 

I don't think the stores should let them do that- it is a lot of pressure on me- I need to make an appt with my therapist after a visit to the grocery store!


----------



## ChisJo

Rozzie said:


> Can I vent just for a second?  I know most of ya'll will understand where I am coming from.  I am working Christmas this year, okay I can live with that, I am a RN and it comes with the paycheck.  But what has bothered me is the reasoning....we have a new manager, who is very "kid" oriented, and scheduled everyone with kids off Christmas, and those without to work.  Her reasoning, we "don't have kids so we don't need the day off".  WTH? When does my DH and dogs and mother not count as family?



As an RN in Alberta, Canada, our contract states that we work either Christmas or New Years, and then switch the next year....they cannot, according to our contract, schedule us just because we have or don't have children....and I think that's the best thing about our contract, because you know, I AM someones child, and they love to see their children at the holidays too!


----------



## Rozzie

ChisJo said:


> As an RN in Alberta, Canada, our contract states that we work either Christmas or New Years, and then switch the next year....they cannot, according to our contract, schedule us just because we have or don't have children....and I think that's the best thing about our contract, because you know, I AM someones child, and they love to see their children at the holidays too!



We don't have a union.  I do have a contract that states I must work 2 major holidays.  Our choices are Thanksgiving, Christmas, NYE and New Years Day.  I was off Christmas last year, as my old manager agreed for me to stay (I was trying to put in my notice and she was begging me to stay) I would work NYE and New Years Day.  (which I was very happy with)  Of course she leaves, and that agreement is out the window.  Like I said earlier, I understand having to work Christmas, but it's so obvious, everyone who is off has kids, everyone working doesn't have kids.  And her comments to boot. Grooooowwwwl.  It's my last holiday season at this hospital, I was planning on trying to find something closer.  I will mention it on my exit interview.....

I am just tired of people asking what "I do with my free time", don't I feel "empty without kids".  I am also sick and tired thinking just because I didn't breed means I don't have a family.


----------



## ChisJo

Rozzie said:


> I am just tired of people asking what "I do with my free time", don't I feel "empty without kids".  I am also sick and tired thinking just because I didn't breed means I don't have a family.



Hey - I totally understand this....I work peds, and the amount of people who ask me why I don't have kids is unbelievable....like because I work in peds, it is mandatory that I have children. It's actually the reverse: the amount of RN's that I know that DON'T have/or want kids that work in peds is way higher (probably because we see the worst of the worst!).

Also, we don't have exit interviews....those sound like they would be a great tension reliever (or a great b***h fest)....but, most people here are leaving their positions due to understaffing and being overworked - but, this is the life of an RN - I'm sure its the same where you are!


----------



## Rozzie

ChisJo said:


> Hey - I totally understand this....I work peds, and the amount of people who ask me why I don't have kids is unbelievable....like because I work in peds, it is mandatory that I have children. It's actually the reverse: the amount of RN's that I know that DON'T have/or want kids that work in peds is way higher (probably because we see the worst of the worst!).
> 
> Also, we don't have exit interviews....those sound like they would be a great tension reliever (or a great b***h fest)....but, most people here are leaving their positions due to understaffing and being overworked - but, this is the life of an RN - I'm sure its the same where you are!



Oh I can't imagine!!  It is bad enough in Neuro people wondering why I am not having kids.  Funny, both our parents have accepted it (they've had 10 years to adjust  ), both are extended families have accepted it, but my coworkers can't let it go.  It's like they will get a bonus gift if I decide to have one.  I really don't understand the comments from patients too.  I understand they are only making conversation, but the comments when I tell them, my lord, why are they so freakin' concerned with it?   

Here ya' on the overworked and underpaid.  I quit picking up extra some time ago, I was getting so bitter, plus with a hour commute and gas, it just was not worth it.  We are losing bundles of nurses, techs, RTs, everything. 

I feel better just being able to vent here.  It's so nice to come to a place where I am not looked upon like I have 2 heads for choosing not to have kids.


----------



## kennancat

Rozzie said:


> But what has bothered me is the reasoning....we have a new manager, who is very "kid" oriented, and scheduled everyone with kids off Christmas, and those without to work.  Her reasoning, we "don't have kids so we don't need the day off".


Seriously, I'd pay a little visit to my HR representative if I were you. You don't have to do it to get her in trouble, go with the attitude of "I'm trying to bring this to your attention to protect you." She really could be opening herself up to trouble with that policy. Do you have anyone in your department that has older children already out of the house? Do they get Christmas off too, or do they not "count"?


----------



## zima-cheryl

kennancat said:


> Seriously, I'd pay a little visit to my HR representative if I were you. You don't have to do it to get her in trouble, go with the attitude of "I'm trying to bring this to your attention to protect you." She really could be opening herself up to trouble with that policy. Do you have anyone in your department that has older children already out of the house? Do they get Christmas off too, or do they not "count"?



I have to second what Kennancat & other are saying.  This sounds illegal.  

If your supervisor said everyone over age XX has to work, that is age discrimination, flat out.  And this isn't very far from that.  

Even if you can live w/it for one year, someone else may jump all over it & sue for lots of $$$.  HR needs to know.  W/how sue happy our society is it will only take another month or 2 before someone files suit.


----------



## honugirl

Ha ha ha ha about the Devils and Newark. I feel the same way. I was reading the Daily News online and they had a review of the stadium and the neighborhood. Holy crap, yeah, that review would make me want to go there. The neighborhood seems to be ok, but everything around it has closed up and oh, there's a heavy police presence there, so it's ok, you can feel safe. Yeah, ok. I felt safe at the Meadowlands, I'm not going to feel safe going into Newark, even with my man by my side. I'll go watch them play at the Garden before I'd go to Newark. It's sad really.  In the same article they were pushing for the Nets to move out there. Why? Why would the Nets want to move to Newark? I just don't get it. My man doesn't even go into Newark and he lives like 2 minutes away... sigh. What's next, they're going to move the racetrack there too? Mmmm, horse poop!  

I really wanted to go work for them after I got my degree, now it looks like I'm going to be going for jobs at Sexual Harrssmentville just across the river.  I just hope by the time I get my degree in a few years Isiah Thomas is gone.


----------



## JenniBugInPink

> do any of you CF couples ever do the character dinners? We were thinking of going to one when we go down there, and truly the only one he would consider is Chef Mickeys - do you think we're crazy?



I'm a hair away from 50, DH and I have no kids (and I'm pretty sure we're not going to at this late date!), but I would not have missed my time with everyone from Pooh Corner at Crystal Palace!  And meeting Remy and Emile was the highlight of my trip.  I waited in line with all the little bitty kids all by myself with my little autograph book in hand, and once I got up there Remy decided to really ham it up.  He wouldn't let me go!  The Photopass photographer really played it up and Emile got in the act and it was hilarious.  Once Remy did let go and Emile started to hug me, Remy smacked him on the nose and they started to fight and the whole place was cracking up.  It was the most fun I think I've ever had in my life - seriously!  So always say YES to character opportunities! 

PS - I'm also an RN and left working the floor at the hospital 14 years ago due to staffing issues.  I always worked all the 'family' holidays because I didn't have kids.  I wasn't married back then, and I'm an only child, so it just seemed like I should.  I mean, it's not like there was anybody to spend the holidays with except Mom and Dad, and we just did them the day before or the next day.  Now that I'm married, I wouldn't be so generous.   I've been working in pharma research since I left the hospital all those years ago and love it.  I've never regretted leaving.


----------



## ChisJo

JenniBugInPink said:


> PS - I'm also an RN and left working the floor at the hospital 14 years ago due to staffing issues.  I always worked all the 'family' holidays because I didn't have kids.  I wasn't married back then, and I'm an only child, so it just seemed like I should.  I mean, it's not like there was anybody to spend the holidays with except Mom and Dad, and we just did them the day before or the next day.  Now that I'm married, I wouldn't be so generous.   I've been working in pharma research since I left the hospital all those years ago and love it.  I've never regretted leaving.



For the last 6 months, I've been having a lot of regrets about being an RN, due to many reasons, but mostly the understaffing and the politics involved in nursing (and the fact that my body seems to shut down way more often than anybody else's that I know! Currently fighting another cold!). I want to leave so badly, but have no idea what I would do. I know I want to stay within the realm of nursing, just unsure of what (also, I love working in Peds!). I know there is so many options out there, it's now just exploring. I applied to go back to school to get my Occupational Health Nursing certificate - I think I would really like this type of career (Mon-Fri, work with a bunch of guys (again, think politics!) - but, the jobs aren't as easy to come by....oh well, we'll see what happens! Nice to see so many other nurses on the boards!


----------



## Rozzie

ChisJo said:


> For the last 6 months, I've been having a lot of regrets about being an RN, due to many reasons, but mostly the understaffing and the politics involved in nursing (and the fact that my body seems to shut down way more often than anybody else's that I know! Currently fighting another cold!). I want to leave so badly, but have no idea what I would do. !



OMG!  I could have written this.  I regret all the time becoming a RN.  But then I think it's just the floor that is killing me.  I know there are other things I could do, but I actually like shift work, and I like my weekend contrat.  (DH works every weekend)  I just get so sick of the sue happy atmosphere, CYA on everything, and the patients demanding that the hospital turn into a resort hotel.  I know we had 1 nurse quit after she gotten in trouble by forgetting a patients coffee---she was busy taking care of numerous critical labs.  That kind of BS.  Okay, I feel better.  Sorry to vent, it is amazing that the burnout is everywhere. 

For those that mentioned HR, I am going to look into that.  I just hope maybe she made the comment in jest, and wasn't serious about it.  (But my gut tells me it was not in jest, KWIM?) I would hate to think I was working for someone that discriminated against the kidless.


----------



## honugirl

It seems like everyone on here is a nurse of some kind, does this mean I have to change my career path to stay on this thread????


----------



## danv3

Rozzie, you should definitely mention it to HR.  What your manager is doing isn't illegal (at least not under federal law or in most states) but it's certainly not a good practice for managing people.


----------



## Hixski

honugirl said:


> It seems like everyone on here is a nurse of some kind, does this mean I have to change my career path to stay on this thread????



I'm not a nurse. I work in IT. Of course that means 24/7 coverage. I don't have to work Christmas but I will be working Thanksgiving. I work Wed/Thurs/Fri - 12hr night shifts. Thanksgiving is ALWAYS on Thursday so I always have to work. At least it is triple time.  I get triple time for the Friday after Thanksgiving too!!!


----------



## ChisJo

Hixski said:


> At least it is triple time.  I get triple time for the Friday after Thanksgiving too!!!



Only Mandatory services in our city get triple time (police officers, firemen), but nurses are not considered mandatory....funny - what the heck would the hospitals do if there were no nurses??


----------



## luvthemouse71

ChisJo said:


> For the last 6 months, I've been having a lot of regrets about being an RN, due to many reasons, but mostly the understaffing and the politics involved in nursing (and the fact that my body seems to shut down way more often than anybody else's that I know! Currently fighting another cold!). I want to leave so badly, but have no idea what I would do. I know I want to stay within the realm of nursing, just unsure of what (also, I love working in Peds!). I know there is so many options out there, it's now just exploring. I applied to go back to school to get my Occupational Health Nursing certificate - I think I would really like this type of career (Mon-Fri, work with a bunch of guys (again, think politics!) - but, the jobs aren't as easy to come by....oh well, we'll see what happens! Nice to see so many other nurses on the boards!


Come to the OR! No area of nursing is perfect but it does seem to be more of a level playing field as far as days off (and everyone, kids or no, has to take call). Depending on where you work, you usually only have to do one major and one minor holiday a year(and this is usually a call shift-meaning you carry a pager and only come in if they need you)and regular call for us is about once a month. As a rule, we don't do weekends, unless we are on call. 
Also, unlike the floors, you actually get breaks and are expected to take them. Sometime in floor nursing, other nurses will get mad if you actually take your break, so the OR is good that way. My hospital is also union, so this keeps the nurse managers in check!

There are no nasty families to deal with either..at least not for extended periods. Some of the surgeons will act up now and then but usually, there's a great sense of comraderie in the OR. I love it.


----------



## KirklandTutu

psst...
There's another thread on the dining board about adults-only places.


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> psst...
> There's another thread on the dining board about adults-only places.



OMG YOU! I did not know YOU were the one who started the thread- so I start reading it, scroll down to the pic and I think HEY! I KNOW that guy!!!!  

You posted a pic of your DH over here and that is where I recognize him from! I quickly looked back up to see who posted it and it was you! 

AW MAN! It's Friday thank goodness!


----------



## maddhatir

honugirl said:


> It seems like everyone on here is a nurse of some kind, does this mean I have to change my career path to stay on this thread????



I work for an MRI facility- billing and collection, but that does not come close to nursing!

.........How about _we_ stick to hockey!


----------



## Mrs.Reese

ChisJo said:


> For the last 6 months, I've been having a lot of regrets about being an RN, due to many reasons, but mostly the understaffing and the politics involved in nursing (and the fact that my body seems to shut down way more often than anybody else's that I know! Currently fighting another cold!). I want to leave so badly, but have no idea what I would do. I know I want to stay within the realm of nursing, just unsure of what (also, I love working in Peds!). I know there is so many options out there, it's now just exploring. I applied to go back to school to get my Occupational Health Nursing certificate - I think I would really like this type of career (Mon-Fri, work with a bunch of guys (again, think politics!) - but, the jobs aren't as easy to come by....oh well, we'll see what happens! Nice to see so many other nurses on the boards!




My lovely Mom left the hospital for all the same reasons.  This was after 26 years of working the ER.  She got a job working for an insurance company doing worker's compensation claims.  Basically all she does is get people to go back to work after getting hurt/sick.  She works 9-5 and has no holidays anymore.  The pay is great!  No more tubes and needles.  Just calling people.


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> .........How about _we_ stick to hockey!



I see Marty got #500 on Saturday!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> I see Marty got #500 on Saturday!



ugh- please do not mention that game 

The Flyers did really bad. I had to stop watching after the 2nd intermission


----------



## ChisJo

maddhatir said:


> ugh- please do not mention that game
> 
> The Flyers did really bad. I had to stop watching after the 2nd intermission



At least your team isn't last in the league.....


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> At least your team isn't last in the league.....



That was last year- I coudn't even watch the season!


----------



## Rozzie

MMm, Hockey, that's played on ice, right?


----------



## maddhatir

Rozzie said:


> MMm, Hockey, that's played on ice, right?




YUP! The ONLY sport worth watching! 

TOTALLY HOT guys on ice. Blood. Stiches. Hitting. Fighting. Slashing. Elbowing! 

Nothing gets better than that!


----------



## KirklandTutu

maddhatir said:


> OMG YOU! I did not know YOU were the one who started the thread- so I start reading it, scroll down to the pic and I think HEY! I KNOW that guy!!!!
> 
> You posted a pic of your DH over here and that is where I recognize him from! I quickly looked back up to see who posted it and it was you!
> 
> AW MAN! It's Friday thank goodness!



ME?!?!?!  lol   Did I post a pic on the dining page?  
And that thread is locked!  dum dum dum.  I think it was the posts implying gay-only establisments would be the next step after adult-only ones.  I think it was done in sarcasim, but it made me laugh.


----------



## Poppinsme

KirklandTutu said:


> ME?!?!?!  lol   Did I post a pic on the dining page?
> And that thread is locked!  dum dum dum.  I think it was the posts implying gay-only establisments would be the next step after adult-only ones.  I think it was done in sarcasim, but it made me laugh.



 I think they closed that thread because of my sarcastic reply to the post made by sjaakie.  I couldn't resist.  It was just my analogy.


----------



## KirklandTutu

Poppinsme said:


> I think they closed that thread because of my sarcastic reply to the post made by sjaakie.  I couldn't resist.  It was just my analogy.



You had me laughing, that's for sure.


----------



## ChisJo

Poppinsme said:


> I think they closed that thread because of my sarcastic reply to the post made by sjaakie.  I couldn't resist.  It was just my analogy.



I feel like I'm missing something here.....


----------



## TKDisneylover

Just wanted to stop in and say Happy Thanksgiving to all the child free couples out there!  Happy Thanksgiving!! 

We had Thanksgiving at our home today with my father-in-law.  It's the second Thanksgiving we've had him over since my mother-in-law passed away.  It was so nice because he actually stayed the entire afternoon and watched the Packers play.  Last year he hightailed it out right after dinner, not sure why.  But this year was very nice. 

How did everyone else spend their Thanksgiving?


----------



## Shyvioletisme

TKDisneylover said:


> Just wanted to stop in and say Happy Thanksgiving to all the child free couples out there!  Happy Thanksgiving!!
> 
> 
> 
> How did everyone else spend their Thanksgiving?



Sounds like you had a wonderful day. DH and I drove down to our hometown and had Thanksgiving with my parents and grandmother. and then drove back home yesterday afternoon! It was a long day, but we had a great lunch and got to spend time with my grandmother, who I don't get to see often enough since we moved.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Shyvioletisme said:


> Sounds like you had a wonderful day. DH and I drove down to our hometown and had Thanksgiving with my parents and grandmother. and then drove back home yesterday afternoon! It was a long day, but we had a great lunch and got to spend time with my grandmother, who I don't get to see often enough since we moved.



Sounds like you also had a nice Thanksgiving.  How great to spend time with your grandmother!

Those times were very precious to me to spend with my grandparents.  Unfortunately for DH he barely remembers his grandparents as he is the youngest of 6 and he never knew his maternal grandparents and his paternal grandparents had passed before his 5th birthday.  His mother came from a family of 14 and his father from a family of 22!

NOW THAT'S A LOT KIDS PEOPLE!!  I CANNOT EVEN IMAGINE WHAT THAT WOULD BE LIKE!


----------



## zima-cheryl

TKDisneylover said:


> Just wanted to stop in and say Happy Thanksgiving to all the child free couples out there!  Happy Thanksgiving!!
> 
> How did everyone else spend their Thanksgiving?



We go out to dinner every Thanksgiving!   
No cooking & no dishes to wash.  Went to a lovely buffet this year w/the in-laws.  Made it home just about half-time of the early game.  Rest of the day was spent on the couch watching football!
 

I always feel bad for the folks who have to work Thanksgiving.  But I do appreciate them doing what they do so I don't have to cook!


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> We go out to dinner every Thanksgiving!
> No cooking & no dishes to wash.  Went to a lovely buffet this year w/the in-laws.  Made it home just about half-time of the early game.  Rest of the day was spent on the couch watching football!
> 
> 
> I always feel bad for the folks who have to work Thanksgiving.  But I do appreciate them doing what they do so I don't have to cook!



I actually considered doing that for next year because this year my gravy got lumps and I pulled the turkey out a little early.  I was using a new fangled (does that age me using this term?) thermometer, thinking the bird would come up to temp (like they always talk about on the food channel) and it went down   so I had to put the darn thing back in the oven.  UGH!! 

I have to admit though, I do enjoy the leftovers.


----------



## dolcezena

Hey All!

Finally caught up & a couple of thoughts...

1) When did it become acceptable to discriminate against child-free people in the workplace?? My asst manager dashes off *all *the time to deal with "a family crisis" that involves his brat of a daughter, & he gets to take PAID Family Leave time for it! I, on the other hand, wanted to take a day off after my cat died, but I was told I had to take vacation time. 

His latest crisis was yesterday - (I need to explain a bit. I work in a liquor store, where our busiest time of day is rush hour home, about 3-6 pm. So, he leaves at 3:30, on a Friday, on GREY CUP WEEKEND! [For non-Canadians, it's the Canadian Football League's championship game], & OUR team is in the game! A little busy in a liquor store?!?!?!? Yup.) So, he leaves & then waltzes back in after the rush is over!

He also tried to schedule me to close Christmas Eve & New Year's Eve, because I "don't have a family." I vetoed that, since New Year's is my & DH's anniversary - fortunately, I scare my asst mgr, so he caved!  

2) I used to looooove hockey - but I find that since we lost our team, I lost a lot of interest in the game. Strangely, I was never a huge fan of the Jets (except when we had Teemu!), I was always a Pittsburgh or Jersey fan!

3) Child-free restaurants? FAN-FREAKIN'-TASTIC idea. I can't see it happening though. 

4) I've fully realized that it's not children I dislike per se, it's parents who ignore/don't control their children in public.

Like I said, I work in a liquor store & all our Christmas displays are up - think 40-50 cases of Smirnoff, all stacked up, in cut cases. And what does some little monster do today? He's running through the store, his mother is ignoring him & he runs right into a display. Say good-bye to 14 bottles of vodka. That we then proceed to clean up, while his mother STILL ignores him! Aaaaargh!

PS - GO BLUE!!


----------



## KirklandTutu

Ahhhh, I must still be feeling the Thanksgiving day stress from dealing with both sets of parents (his and mine) who both still expect kids.  Today, we went to Ikea and I found it difficult to not file a formal complaint about the 'family parking' area.  I'm normally not so thin skinned, but I think our parents wore me down on Thursday.


----------



## ChisJo

KirklandTutu said:


> Ahhhh, I must still be feeling the Thanksgiving day stress from dealing with both sets of parents (his and mine) who both still expect kids.  Today, we went to Ikea and I found it difficult to not file a formal complaint about the 'family parking' area.  I'm normally not so thin skinned, but I think our parents wore me down on Thursday.



I get this everytime we see the parents too....Recently, I met a man at work who had *8* kids and he asked me about my kids. When I said I didn't have any nor did I want any, he said I was crazy, and people like me "don't know what their missing". He said he can't imagine why someone would want to go through life without kids. I just smiled and said thanks for the kind words. What freakin business is it of his anyways??? I really wanted to say "well, I'm not having kids because you so kindly have helped to populate the world with your own hockey team", but thought that may have been inappropriate.


----------



## TKDisneylover

ChisJo said:


> I really wanted to say "well, I'm not having kids because you so kindly have helped to populate the world with your own hockey team", but thought that may have been inappropriate.



Honestly that would have been hilarious had you said it.  Can you imagine the look on his face! 

Of course we take the kind road, but they can say things like, "your crazy and people like you don't know what your missing."  People like us?  Yes we do know what we're missing, we won't go crazy trying to feed, cloth & send them through college!!


----------



## maddhatir

dolcezena said:


> Hey All!
> 
> (I need to explain a bit. I work in a liquor store,



Liquor store- let me ask you- do you drink absinthe??

Here in the States we just started getting it. I found this out _only _after doing some research AFTER I ordered a bottle online that was shipped from Germany! It cost me 135.00! The shipping was just as much as the bottle.

I just had a few shots- it is OK. It feels like I took a good perscription cough medicine. I ordered the ALANDIA Suisse La Bleue Clandestine- I personally do not feel it needs sugar- I think it is sweet enough and I did not add any water either. I am not crazy about anise- but the flavor is not too bad--

BUT! it is _VERY HOT _going down though. I did happen upon something weird. I was drinking coke before pouring my shot. After taking a few sips of my shot- I wanted some coke- so I took a sip of coke then a shot of the absinthe- OMG- it made the shot so much smoother to go down- I wonder if that is what the sugar would do???


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Liquor store- let me ask you- do you drink absinthe??
> 
> Here in the States we just started getting it. I found this out _only _after doing some research AFTER I ordered a bottle online that was shipped from Germany! It cost me 135.00! The shipping was just as much as the bottle.
> 
> I just had a few shots- it is OK. It feels like I took a good perscription cough medicine. I ordered the ALANDIA Suisse La Bleue Clandestine- I personally do not feel it needs sugar- I think it is sweet enough and I did not add any water either. I am not crazy about anise- but the flavor is not too bad--
> 
> BUT! it is _VERY HOT _going down though. I did happen upon something weird. I was drinking coke before pouring my shot. After taking a few sips of my shot- I wanted some coke- so I took a sip of coke then a shot of the absinthe- OMG- it made the shot so much smoother to go down- I wonder if that is what the sugar would do???



When we went to Mexico people were doing shots of absinthe, but we passed.  I had heard conflicting things about it (just being so strong) that I didn't want to chance having a hangover while sitting on a beautiful beach the next day.  Yea right, so I did that with tequila instead! 

You could be right about the coke making it smoother to go down since there is a lot of sugar in the regular Coke. 

Um, do you think they sell that at Disney?  Like maybe in Germany at World Showcase?!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> When we went to Mexico people were doing shots of absinthe, but we passed.  I had heard conflicting things about it (just being so strong) that I didn't want to chance having a hangover while sitting on a beautiful beach the next day.  Yea right, so I did that with tequila instead!
> 
> You could be right about the coke making it smoother to go down since there is a lot of sugar in the regular Coke.
> 
> Um, do you think they sell that at Disney?  Like maybe in Germany at World Showcase?!




I am NOT a drinker and I had 2 shots w/in a half hour and I was fine. I had a headache afterwards- but that could have been from anything! I could have probably done one or 2 more if I was out drinking. I was certainly not impressed with it- I will stick to my vice - WAY more fun! 

DH did not even care for it. 

I will be able to check to see if they sell it in Disney b/c I am leaving Wed night- DH and I are doing a spur of the moment trip to meet up with BIL, SIL and the kiddies!

I would think I would have better luck finding it in France though- But hey- I will certainly check in Germany too!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I will stick to my vice - WAY more fun!



I totally agree with that!  No HANGOVERS!!!



maddhatir said:


> I would think I would have better luck finding it in France though- But hey- I will certainly check in Germany too!



We will be there Sunday, so I will check out both France & Germany.  Maybe we will get lucky and find some to try.  I don't think I want to shell out $135 a bottle.  But that does remind of the time we had two $65.00 shots of tequila, would never do it again, but it was excellent stuff! 

Have a nice spur of the moment vacation!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I totally agree with that!  No HANGOVERS!!!
> 
> 
> 
> We will be there Sunday, so I will check out both France & Germany.  Maybe we will get lucky and find some to try.  I don't think I want to shell out $135 a bottle.  But that does remind of the time we had two $65.00 shots of tequila, would never do it again, but it was excellent stuff!
> 
> Have a nice spur of the moment vacation!



Oh wow- we are leaving Sunday!

The bottle only cost that much b/c the shipping was just as much as the bottle. It would have been about 65.00 for just the bottle.

We do have 2 different types in a liquor store down the street from us- I think one of the bottles is only 35.00.


----------



## Cara

I do have one child, but I have the perfect answer for the folks who should mind their own business.  DH's grandfather was a dirty old man.  Seriously.  From the time we got married, he was on our case.  When are you going to have kids?  Are you ever going to have a baby?  Yada, yada.  One day he said, "When are you going to have kids.  Can't you have any?"

My response:  "We don't plan to have children.  I just married him for sex."

He never asked again.


----------



## ChisJo

Cara said:


> IOne day he said, "When are you going to have kids.  Can't you have any?"
> 
> My response:  "We don't plan to have children.  I just married him for sex."
> 
> He never asked again.



That's my new response!!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Cara said:


> My response:  "We don't plan to have children.  I just married him for sex."
> 
> He never asked again.



I love it!  That is an excellent response, especially for a "dirty old man."  Thank goodness we do not have to worry about that question any more.  I think once we hit our 40's they finally gave up.


----------



## Cara

LOL!  Glad you liked the response.  I thought my DH was going to pass out, LOL.  I just could not believe his nerve.  "Can't you have any?"  I hate to speak ill of the dead, but he was a jerk!


----------



## BigGreen73

Cara said:


> I do have one child, but I have the perfect answer for the folks who should mind their own business.  DH's grandfather was a dirty old man.  Seriously.  From the time we got married, he was on our case.  When are you going to have kids?  Are you ever going to have a baby?  Yada, yada.  One day he said, "When are you going to have kids.  Can't you have any?"
> 
> My response:  "We don't plan to have children.  I just married him for sex."
> 
> He never asked again.



Love it.  

My DW and I have been married for over 10 years and we have no kids and are not planning on having any either. I personnally get along fine with kids and they gravitate towards me as I am a big kid myself. I have about a dozen nieces and nephews of varying ages, Everyone gives me the same lines of you guys would be great parents, you'd be an awesome dad, why don't you want any, you should have some, you don't know what your missing, not even one, etc etc etc. Ugh!! I did know having a kid was an obligation.  It doesn't bother me anyway. Our life our choice. Period. Plus that just gives us extra cash for WDW.


----------



## zima-cheryl

BigGreen73 -- Saco, Maine!  Small world.  We drive by you every summer on our way to Bar Harbor.  Next time we go by the exit I'll wave.   

We love our annual treck to Maine!  Long stop at the outlets in Kittery to do a bit of shopping then off to hike the backwoods for a few days.  
Beautiful country up that way - at least in the summer.  Not sure I'd visit in the winter months.


----------



## Donald&Tinkerbell

DH is from Augusta and the Navy sent us from FL to Winter Harbor for 2 years.  I loved it, it was beautiful.  Winters were a shock, this FL girl had never left the South until then.  This was 1980 and we've been back in FL for 18 years.  DH loves being this close to heaven (WDW).  When we were in Maine, though, pressure from the in-laws was heavy.  DH is the oldest of 6 and his mother chose to ignore our decision.  My DM raised us to make a conscious decision about having kids.  Funny, she had 3 daughters & 1 son, the son is the only one with kids.


----------



## BigGreen73

zima-cheryl said:


> BigGreen73 -- Saco, Maine!  Small world.  We drive by you every summer on our way to Bar Harbor.  Next time we go by the exit I'll wave.
> 
> We love our annual treck to Maine!  Long stop at the outlets in Kittery to do a bit of shopping then off to hike the backwoods for a few days.
> Beautiful country up that way - at least in the summer.  Not sure I'd visit in the winter months.




I'll be sure to wave back. Just be sure to honk.


----------



## Liisa

Madd,

I'm a little late catching up... but an impromptu trip to WDW?!!  How did you manage it.  I thought your DH needed a break?  Whatever you did, it worked!  Good Job!!!   

Liisa


----------



## Rozzie

I was thinking of this thread the other day at work,  where I am affectionately known as the kid hater.   I have quite a few people tell me in private that they are jealous of me sometimes, and wonder what their life would have been if they never had their kids.  Yet, in a group, they still like to rib me for not having kids.  It is strange how coworkers declare it their mission in life to get you to breed.  Really, is their life that boring?  

So question for the thread. Anybody thinking of getting their "plumbing" out?  For my 35th (32 now), my Doc has already agreed to it, as there are some medical issues too that help my argument.  Not to be too terribly nosy, just wondering if anyone is going this route a little earlier than usual.  (Yep, my doc won't do it till' I'm 35, each appt, asks, "changed your mind yet?"  )


----------



## pfalcioni

You know, it's funny that so many of you have had people razz them about their childless choice.

I'm in my 40's, been married since I was 27, and never had a single person ask more than once.  Maybe it's my attitude?  Maybe I don't act like 'parent' material?  Weird.

I'm lucky that my bro and his wife took care of the grandkid thing.


----------



## KirklandTutu

I think it's a bigger issue with my family because both DH and I are only children.  

On the plumbing issue...when I mentioned to my doctor that I didn't want kids she was all 'ok, here's the procedures, we can do it today if you want'.  What?!?!?!  just like that?  I'm 31, and while I've never wanted kids and doubt I ever will, I do think that I should wait a few more years just incase the bug catches.


----------



## zima-cheryl

KirklandTutu said:


> .... I do think that I should wait a few more years just incase the bug catches.



The beauty of it is we have _soooo _ many options that you can stay child-free w/out doing anything permanent.  

Personally I had the Essure done back in March & couldn't be happier.  Didn't like the idea of surgery, so the office procedure was perfect for me.  I'd really recommend that to anyone ready to go permanent.

And as for some doctors waiting until patients are a certain age - in a way I can understand.  We are such a litigious society.  Can't you see some kid getting her tubes tied then suing the doctor 5 years later 'cause she changed her mind?  You know it probably has happened.


----------



## PoohNTuck

Hey Friends!
After several years of discussion and a little more than 6 mos marriage...
DH and I made the VAS appt today.  

It's not until Jan 9th (we're away and then the doc is away for the holidays) but we're already nervous.  Wondering if anyone could share the details of their appt, any questions asked, or anything to expect.  DH and I are several years apart.  I'm nearly 30 and he's in his early 20s.  My hormonal pills are no longer working for me and I feel sad with very decreased libido on the newer, higher pills.  We've upped me to the highest hormone I can do and the only benefit is pregnancy prevention.  Long term use of condoms will lead to pregnancy as we won't use them reliably enough. Neither of us enjoy them at all.  And while I did attempt NFP my cycles are so irregular from 15 years on the pill that I don't feel it's a safe way to prevent pregnancy.

We just want to make sure we have a successful meeting with the doc and no problems getting the procedure okayed.  I'm afraid because I've read that people are denied for young age.  We are married and have decided that we don't want children.  Our occasional reasons for wanting them are shallow and fleeting.  Knowing that we may "change our minds" we are prepared to adopt if and when we ever feel ready for children.  And of course, nobody is prepared to talk about divorce.  For example, if his next wife wanted children... but we aren't making any other decisions based on what his "next wife" would want so...  can anyone ask any questions or give us any advice in preparation for the appt?  We've read about the procedure many times, clearly understand the anatomy and practicalities surrounding the outpatient (no scalpel) procedure.  And, I'm an R.N. and very prepared to cater to him for a few days while he "elevates his feet" and recovers.

It would just be embarrassing/frustrating/hurtful to be denied in January and there aren't many providers in our rural area (particularly those skilled in the no scalpel procedure) so despite his age we want to make a good impression on the doctor.

Anything I'm missing?  We have a bit over a month til the appt so please give any and all advice/questions/etc on the board or in a PM if desired.

TIA,
PoohNTuck


----------



## 3DisneyKids

Hi--I can share our experience with you.  When my DH got his VAS, we were done with kids (we have 3) and he was 36.  And even with that, we had a REALLY hard time getting the procedure done...and get this...the doc was a family friend!  Ans he still thought that we were too young to make the decision.  

As this was a friend, we entered into the discussion of "how young is too young?" with him.   Basically, he said that there isn't a doc worth beans who would do the procedure on a male before the age of 30 (without the male having some sort of related medical issue).  He further said that if you found a doc willing to do the procedure on someone that young, then RUN AWAY b/c it means the doc isn't worth squat.  Again, this is what our doc said...YMMV.

I know that this isn't the news you wanted to hear, but I thought you might appreciate it so that you can at least be prepared for this response.

I understand that you hate the birth control that you are on now...have tried methods other than hormones?  You have definitely been on the pill long enough!  Yuck!  How about an IUD?  Depo Provera shot?  (this is hormone-based, but not nearly as hard core as others out there...I was on this for years and loved it.)  There are LOTS of alternatives out there other tahn condoms and the pill.

Also, since you are older, you might have a better shot of having your tubes tied.  Yes, it is more invasive than what a man goes through with a vasectomy, but it is another avenue for you to pursue.


----------



## Hixski

I'm not sure too many of us have gone this route yet. DH and I are pushing 50 so we don't have to worry so much. ( I hope ) I think there might be a couple of people who can help but I'm not sure. Good luck!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Madd,
> 
> I'm a little late catching up... but an impromptu trip to WDW?!!  How did you manage it.  I thought your DH needed a break?  Whatever you did, it worked!  Good Job!!!
> 
> Liisa



  He did. I had planned a trip for BIL, SIL and their 2 kids for Nov 28/Dec 2- I was going to tag along without DH- but then I decided not to. 

About a week before their trip I started talking about it and he said "we'll see" WELL! That is ALL you have to say to ME! "Well see" is like a BIG OLD YES to me! He has been so stressed with the addition and I was sick and tired of looking at the house. 

We talked about it and he have me an option. If we go to Disney- he gets a bigger sailboat He JUST got his first one this past summer- I think it is 20'- he did not get a chance to get it into the water b/c he was busy with the addition. I asked him why he even bought it. He did not know b/c he said that it is not even the one he wanted- it was a spur of the moment purchase. It was only 600.00 how can you plass that up. 

So he will fix it up and sell it. 

So it was kind of a tit for tat thing


----------



## maddhatir

Rozzie said:


> So question for the thread. Anybody thinking of getting their "plumbing" out?  For my 35th (32 now), my Doc has already agreed to it, as there are some medical issues too that help my argument.  Not to be too terribly nosy, just wondering if anyone is going this route a little earlier than usual.  (Yep, my doc won't do it till' I'm 35, each appt, asks, "changed your mind yet?"  )



Believe it or not! DH had his done when he was only 26 or 27! It has been so long I cannot remember! It may have been 1992??? 

The doctor did not have a problem doing it- We have never regretted the decision- ever!

I was going to have surgery but DH said there was no way he would want me to go through unnecessary anesthesia and a hospital stay when it would be much easier for him to go through the procedure!

We went on vacation a few days later


----------



## pfalcioni

"Believe it or not! DH had his done when he was only 26 or 27! It has been so long I cannot remember! It may have been 1992??? "

Ours was the same.  My DH was about 27 I think.  I had minor health problems with the pill and was soooooo happy to not have to take it any longer.

We had no questions or problem having the procedure done.  Of course, we both knew we absolutely would not ever want kids.  

However, if you have any ideas about 'if we decide later we want kids, we'll adopt' then I don't think it's a smart choice to have the VAS done yet.

Adoption is difficult - getting a baby is near-impossible these days, and extremely costly.  If you think you might get a child from another country, or an older child, it's a wonderful thing, but you may end up with a child who has health and emotional issues.

There are other bc options that are more reversible and very secure.

Even if you do decide to go the VAS route - I'd say don't mention to the doc or nurse about the adoption option - just say that you both have never wanted children, even when you were single and not a 'couple', this was a decision you both made before you got together.

This was the truth for us, and seemed to be the ticket for our doc.

Don't think I'm against adoption - I'm adopted myself!  It's just that I've seen what it takes to go through adoption - pregnancy usually is easier, cheaper, and takes less time


----------



## kennancat

PoohNTuck said:


> We just want to make sure we have a successful meeting with the doc and no problems getting the procedure okayed.  I'm afraid because I've read that people are denied for young age.  We are married and have decided that we don't want children.
> 
> <snip>
> 
> It would just be embarrassing/frustrating/hurtful to be denied in January and there aren't many providers in our rural area (particularly those skilled in the no scalpel procedure) so despite his age we want to make a good impression on the doctor.


If you are denied, I would suggest you find a good doctor in Orlando willing to do it and combine it with your next Disney trip!


----------



## druidia

PoohNTuck said:


> Hey Friends!
> After several years of discussion and a little more than 6 mos marriage...
> DH and I made the VAS appt today.
> ...
> It would just be embarrassing/frustrating/hurtful to be denied in January and there aren't many providers in our rural area (particularly those skilled in the no scalpel procedure) so despite his age we want to make a good impression on the doctor.
> 
> Anything I'm missing?  We have a bit over a month til the appt so please give any and all advice/questions/etc on the board or in a PM if desired.
> 
> TIA,
> PoohNTuck



Sent you a PM.


----------



## PoohNTuck

In response to

_I understand that you hate the birth control that you are on now...have tried methods other than hormones? You have definitely been on the pill long enough! Yuck! How about an IUD? Depo Provera shot? (this is hormone-based, but not nearly as hard core as others out there...I was on this for years and loved it.) There are LOTS of alternatives out there other tahn condoms and the pill._

I had depo for about 6 months this spring and bled for 4 of the months (after approx 4 weeks I would bleed until the next shot.  Also, I haven't tried an IUD but I'm really uncomfortable going that route.  Really, when you eliminate hormonal methods- the condom, vasectomy, and tubal (6 weeks off work in my first year here- not going to happen) are about what's left.

It's extremely frustrating that I see so many young couples bringing sick NICU babies to me everyday with NO REGULATION on their birth control methods but my husband and I are going to encounter such difficulty in our choice to not have children.  Very frustrating.  I can't believe taxpayers aren't more outraged at how difficult it is to get a vasectomy... I never imagined so many stories of opposition but that's all I've found online...


----------



## zima-cheryl

PoohNTuck said:


> Really, when you eliminate hormonal methods- the condom, vasectomy, and tubal (6 weeks off work in my first year here- not going to happen) are about what's left.



Actually ask your OBGYN about the Essure.  It is permanent, non-hormonal, and is an outpatient procedure.  I missed work the day of the procedure and DH took the day off to drive me there/home and pamper me after.  I was back at work the next day.  

http://www.essure.com

Trying not to get into too much detail - basically they block your tubes.  Much easier than the tubal.  I won't say it is a walk in the park, but a few days of discomfort are worth the end result.  

We have been very pleased w/our decision to go this route & now that I'm off the pill and we don't have to worry about an "oops" we have both been feeling much more frisky lately


----------



## 3DisneyKids

PoohNTuck said:


> In response to
> 
> _I understand that you hate the birth control that you are on now...have tried methods other than hormones? You have definitely been on the pill long enough! Yuck! How about an IUD? Depo Provera shot? (this is hormone-based, but not nearly as hard core as others out there...I was on this for years and loved it.) There are LOTS of alternatives out there other tahn condoms and the pill._
> 
> I had depo for about 6 months this spring and bled for 4 of the months (after approx 4 weeks I would bleed until the next shot.  Also, I haven't tried an IUD but I'm really uncomfortable going that route.  Really, when you eliminate hormonal methods- the condom, vasectomy, and tubal (6 weeks off work in my first year here- not going to happen) are about what's left.
> 
> It's extremely frustrating that I see so many young couples bringing sick NICU babies to me everyday with NO REGULATION on their birth control methods but my husband and I are going to encounter such difficulty in our choice to not have children.  Very frustrating.  I can't believe taxpayers aren't more outraged at how difficult it is to get a vasectomy... I never imagined so many stories of opposition but that's all I've found online...




Not that I am trying to talk you into tubal...lol...but you would not be out of work for 6 weeks.  Maybe 3-5 days at the most.  6 weeks is considered the recovery time for a C-section.  And while many women opt to have their tubes tied "as long as the docs are in there for the c-section anyway," if you were having JUST a tubal without also delivering a baby via c-section, then it is a different incision entirely.  The tubal-only procedure is done laparoscopically.   Still, both the essure and a VAS are easier procedures with a shorter recovery.  From WebMD:

After a laparoscopic tubal ligation, the recovery process is generally very straight-forward.   You typically stay in the recovery area for 2-4 hours, where you remain under observation.  Once you have recovered sufficiently, you may go home.  This almost always occurs on the same day as the procedure.  

After the procedure, you may experience any, all, or none of the following 

--Feeling sleepy or groggy from the anesthetic - this usually passes by the next morning. 
--Shoulder pain, bloated feeling - this is caused by the gas, and typically passes within 1-2 days. 
--Incisional pain - this usually subsides within 2-4 days after the procedure. 
--Pelvic cramps - these usually pass within 1 or 2 days after the procedure, and usually aren't that bad. 
--******l bleeding - this is usually light, and may last up to 1 to 2 weeks after the procedure. 
--Watery ******l discharge - if we have checked your fallopian tubes to see if they are open.  This usually stops within 1-2 days after the procedure. 

After a laparoscopy, you should avoid lifting anything heavier than a gallon of milk (approximately 10 pounds) for at least 2 weeks.


----------



## TKDisneylover

We came back from our WDW trip last Saturday.  We had a great time, the weather was wonderful, and oh boy, did we see lots of parents needing "lessons in parenting"!

We stayed at the Animal Kingdom Lodge, what a beautiful resort!  We will definitely be staying there again!

One afternoon DH & I were walking down a quiet hallway admiring the photos & items on display from Africa.  All of a sudden two children about the ages of 7 & 9 came running down the hallway, no parents in sight.  I quietly whispered to my DH that I felt sorry for anyone who may be taking an afternoon nap as these kids were yelling and banging on doors while they were running down the hall.  Around the corner came the parents, and the father says (somewhat sarcastically) to us, "you should really discipline those kids for acting that way," and they walked on by kind of snickering.  Now these were definitely the kids parents, I'm sure of it, why the heck is he telling us we should be disciplining them?  Obviously it was a joke to them by "their" actions, but why say something like that to us to begin with?

There were also two moms who had just gotten off a bus the same time we had at the resort bus stop that were arguing.  At first we did not pay much attention to them but when they started swearing (definitely not appropriate for little ears!) at each other and calling each other unfit mothers I paid a little more attention.  One woman actually was going to grab the other woman by the throat, but the other said "you better not touch me or I will kick your a**!"  All this as others are walking by and their small children crying and saying "no mommy, no mommy!"  I almost considered mentioning this to security but by the time we reached the main entrance they appeared to have calmed down.

I will have to say that I will not return to WDW during the holiday season as there appeared to be a lot of families with very small children, lots of crying babies!  I think we will stick with visiting during February & October as we did not encounter that during our visits at those particular times of the year.  And many parents appeared to be exhausted and snapping at their children, or there were the others that completely ignored the "running wild" behaviors of their little ones.


----------



## ChisJo

I too found last week to be full of children....I didn't think it would be that bad, considering it's supposed to be the "slow season". We saw SO many kids freakin out and acting innapropriately without any discipline from their parents. Everyday, we went to the parks, we had a bet as to when we would see the first child freaking out....it was usually before 10! We actually kept laughing whenever we saw "stroller alley" - thinking how crazy it was that there were so many strollers there! We meant to get a pic of one of the areas because literally, the area had about 250 strollers (kid you not!) and not a person in sight of the strollers...it was eerily quiet! Well, for 20 minutes anyways.
I heard so many people getting mad at their kids for crying because they "paid alot of money to come down there and didn't want to hear them cry!" I HATE those comments....obviously if your kid is complaining about being tired, then maybe it's time to leave!
Anyways, I posted a trip report on the Canadian planning board....here's the link:http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1659151. It's kind of long - just to warn you!

Now, as for the ? about birth control...I hated the depo (I know I've posted that on here before). THe problem with the depo is that once you get it injected, it's in you for 3 months. There is no antidote for it! I am currently on the merina iud and like it - it stays in place for 5 years, and the hormone release is extremely minimal - I have had no side effects from it at all. Some people completely stop their menstrual cycles on this after about 6 months...I have not, but the amount I menstruate has significantly decreased! I have tried to convince BF to get the VAS, but he is refusing....says it's too permanent, and maybe we can talk about it in a couple of years.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Around the corner came the parents, and the father says (somewhat sarcastically) to us, "you should really discipline those kids for acting that way," and they walked on by kind of snickering.  Now these were definitely the kids parents, I'm sure of it, why the heck is he telling us we should be disciplining them?  Obviously it was a joke to them by "their" actions, but why say something like that to us to begin with?



Ewwww- I wonder if maybe they overheard you make the comment???

I was there 2 weeks ago and I did not notice too many kids throwing tantrums-- oh, yeah!   That is b/c I was with my niece and nephew throwing their own!- No, believe it or not they were surprisingly well behaved. 

One night- DH and I offered to take them out (they are 3 and 5) to give the units some time to themselves I was SCARED TO DEATH my 3 yr old nephew would act up- god forbid he does not see MOMMMMMMMY around he will go BONKERS!   But nope, we were SO lucky they were angels the whole night! OK- well when we told him we had to leave the MK (b/c the xmas party was going to start- he screamed his head off on Main Street! DH calmed him down by talking to him and by the time we reached the exit- he was fine!) Thank goodness. I kind of felt bad for him- all he kept saying was "I wanna see the blue castle" We were eating and all I heard was "I wanna see the blue castle" We walked him around the darn thing, right up to it! and stopped every 5 feet- I kept saying- "suck in the sight kid, cuz we gotta leave"  

We had them out until 1:30am! We found out Epcot was having their evening EHM when we got there -we all were having a blast! They were wide awake until they hit the bus! 

Get this- all I kept thinking was, people are going to think I am a bad parent b/c my nephew REFUSED to put on his jacket- it was CHILLY! He had shorts and a button up shirt on! I am worried that people are going to think I was a bad parent- AND I AM NOT EVEN A PARENT!!! 

Of course I just HAD to take this pic of them when we got off the bus- they were *unconscious* after a night with us! And no- we did not put my nephew in the stroller like this- he just "ended up this way"


----------



## maddhatir

Sooooo- did any of you hear, once again, about the little monsters @ Pop Warner???

Do you expect anything less from kids and the parents.....

Lawsuit?........  

http://www.cfnews13.com/News/Local/2007/12/9/pop_warner_teams_thrown_out_of_disney.html

Here is the DIS thread...
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1658406


----------



## MapleGirl

maddhatir said:


> Sooooo- did any of you hear, once again, about the little monsters @ Pop Warner???
> 
> Do you expect anything less from kids and the parents.....
> 
> Lawsuit?........
> 
> http://www.cfnews13.com/News/Local/2007/12/9/pop_warner_teams_thrown_out_of_disney.html
> 
> Here is the DIS thread...
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1658406



Just sick.  Kids behaving like brats and parents not taking responsibility for their spawn.  I'm glad Disney kicked them out at night.  Maybe they (the kids and parents) learned something!  I wish Disney would have a 'child-free' week where only people over 18 are allowed.  

Let's see if I get flamed for this!


----------



## maddhatir

MapleGirl said:


> Just sick.  Kids behaving like brats and parents not taking responsibility for their spawn.  I'm glad Disney kicked them out at night.  Maybe they (the kids and parents) learned something!  I wish Disney would have a 'child-free' week where only people over 18 are allowed.
> 
> Let's see if I get flamed for this!



  Don't expect any flames from US!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Ewwww- I wonder if maybe they overheard you make the comment???



Honestly I don't think so.  I whispered it and they hadn't even come around the corner yet.  Hey, maybe it was their own guilt realizing how rude their kids were and that was the first thing that came to his mind, kind of like, "I" should be discipling them?  Had I thought fast enough I would have said, you brought them into this world, it's your job!  Unfortunately all I could say was, No way!  I'm just not very quick that way.


----------



## Mrs.Reese

MapleGirl said:


> Just sick.  Kids behaving like brats and parents not taking responsibility for their spawn.  I'm glad Disney kicked them out at night.  Maybe they (the kids and parents) learned something!  I wish Disney would have a 'child-free' week where only people over 18 are allowed.
> 
> Let's see if I get flamed for this!



You won't getting any flames from me!!  I have a 12 year old in my 3rd grade class.  He is absolutely terrible!!  Dad comes into observe and just couldn't contain himself.  The kid did his normal "look at me! look at me!" attention seeking behaviors and then when its time to do his work he starts in on the "nobody likes me" excuse.  It is his FOURTH time in third grade since he can't pass the state test (which you only have to get 50% right on to pass).  Of course, Dad thinks its all our fault.  He hates how I teach.  He thinks kids should sit still in rows, teacher does all talking, kids absorb and kids take no initiative.  Dad also is yet to respond to my 12 phone calls this year and don't even get me started on how many notes home I have sent.  Thank goodness he is only with me for math! 

I could write a novel on how parents don't accept responsibility for their kids.  It's always the TEACHER'S fault.  Kudos to Disney for their enforcement


----------



## Rozzie

ChisJo said:


> Now, as for the ? about birth control...I hated the depo (I know I've posted that on here before). THe problem with the depo is that once you get it injected, it's in you for 3 months. There is no antidote for it! I am currently on the merina iud and like it - it stays in place for 5 years, and the hormone release is extremely minimal - I have had no side effects from it at all. .



Thanks for posting this.  I keep seeing the commercial, but haven't found anyone with first hand experience.  I think I might look into this. 

Don't get me started on ill behaved children in WDW.  OMG, it's like fright night.  

Speaking of kids, ya'll please remind me never to use the term "breeders" on the CB.  Good grief, some people have no sense of humor.


----------



## maddhatir

Rozzie said:


> Speaking of kids, ya'll please remind me never to use the term "breeders" on the CB.  Good grief, some people have no sense of humor.



 You should have come and got us- we would have helped you out a bit! Everyone is way TOO sensitive anymore. 

Breeders...that IS a funny word though!


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## calliemom

krissalee, I just came across your post and it made me smile.  Although we have 1 child (she's now 8) when she was around 2 all we got from people was ....So when are you having another one?  Poor thing won't have any siblings!  You can't just have 1 child! and on and on and on.  That went on for a few years from both family, friends and strangers alike.  I think once she entered school people actually started to believe us when we said we were just having the one.  But it never ceases to amaze me at the ignorance there is out there!  These are private matters between a husband and wife, whether they choose not to have children, adopt or have only 1 child it is truly not anyones business but your own. 
Good for you for knowing what you want and standing by that.  I'm sure your life is full with love and happiness!
Cheers!


----------



## Liisa

Just got back from my week with my in-laws, 5 yo nephew and 14 yo niece.  I really enjoyed my in-laws and my niece (she was tons of fun).  My 5 yo nephew, while he is pretty well behaved, I was soooo happy to be in my nice quiet house with DH when the vacation was over.  I can't imagine how parents do it.  It is constant 24/7.  I'm exhausted.  DH and I are rethinking taking my other nieces and nephews down to the World.  We like it so much better when it is an "adults" vacation.


----------



## maddhatir

When we were down there a few weeks ago with BIL, SIL and the 2 kids- BIL got po'd at me and SIL b/c we kept making comments how he is a grump and does not like Disney (he IS a grump and does NOT like Disney) 

He repsonded- I would like Disney MORE if I could have my 2 kids behave while I am here   

I told him- NEVER GONNA HAPPEN!!!!!!! NEVER!........EVER!!!.....

Oh happy times! DH and I went our seperate ways a few times- not b/c of the kids- it was more to get away from Mr Grumpy!


----------



## ChisJo

a little off topic here folks, but has anyone ever seen the show "the 8 of us"? It's the show on TLC about the parents that have a set of 5? or 6? yo twin girls (can't remember there ages) and a set of 2 yo sextuplets? They took them to WDW! And were amazingly organized...but truly!?!?!? That amount of children = INSANE!!! Could you imagine??? I see people struggling with 2, but they have *8* kids!


----------



## TKDisneylover

ChisJo said:


> a little off topic here folks, but has anyone ever seen the show "the 8 of us"? It's the show on TLC about the parents that have a set of 5? or 6? yo twin girls (can't remember there ages) and a set of 2 yo sextuplets? They took them to WDW! And were amazingly organized...but truly!?!?!? That amount of children = INSANE!!! Could you imagine??? I see people struggling with 2, but they have *8* kids!



I think the show you are referring to is called Jon & Kate plus 8.  Like you said they have 2 twin girls and sextuplets, 3 boys, 3 girls.  I actually watch this show, mostly because I am amazed at how organized mom is.  I usually turn it off half way through because they will show all six crying and screaming at once and my ears are too sensitive for that.   However I did watch the Disney episode all the way through because, well it was Disney!

Speaking of crying & screaming, we had a toddler on one of our connecting flights from Disney that cried the entire trip.  This was from Atlanta to Milwaukee, UGH!! Have people not heard of Earplanes??!!  And the mom kept telling the child to "shut-up, just shut-up".  Amazing!


----------



## sunny04

We're dealing with some of that right now.  We're still not entirely sure if we will have children.  My husband has a lot of anxieties and we just don't feel that we should put a child into the mix right now.  We just aren't sure if we want to have children or not.  

But of course, we've been married 5 years and everyone asks and all my friends are having babies!  The last time someone asked, I answered, "That's a loaded question.  Just let it go."  I laughed so it wouldn't sound so rude, but I don't feel like I should have to continually smile and say "Not yet..." over and over again.  I think people need to realize that they don't know what they are asking about when they ask about having children.  It can be a touchy subject sometimes.

Not to mention - I don't know how people can afford WDW with a family!!  We're just fine taking the two of us, thank you!


----------



## ChisJo

TKDisneylover said:


> I think the show you are referring to is called Jon & Kate plus 8.



Yep - that's the one. I couldn't remember the show's name, so thanks for clarifying.


----------



## FamilyGuyDisney1965

I have been married for 10 years and no children yet...I am too busy with work (information technology manager for small manufacturing company) and the wife isn't pushing for a child. One day, though.

-FamilyGuyDisney1965


----------



## WDWguru

FGD1965 - No offense, but read the thread before you post. At least read a page or two. "One day, though" indicates you are not childfree.


----------



## TXTurtles

We just got back and every time some kid would start screaming or having a rough time (which, fortunately, wasn't often) my DH would lean over and say "you want five or six of those, right?"  I know some people are kids people and for them life without their kiddos would be like life without chocolate, coffee, and disney for me but, well, for those of us who aren't ... 

And for the record I'm the one who told DH when we were first dating that if he wanted kids it would be with someone else.  He was relieved - he grew up in a kid-centric area and thought that he'd have to put up with kids to please his wife.  Not this wife - the two of us (plus fish) make up the perfect size family for me.

On a side note, am I the only one who doesn't see a someday wish for kids as being grounds for being voted off this thread?  Unless they start chiding all of us for not having anyone to visit us in our nursing homes.  Then I'll lead the voting.


----------



## KirklandTutu

Just wanted to drop by, say hi and once more thank the heavens that we don't have kids.  I couldn't imagine trying to cope with kids this time of year, I have to deal with enough with producing our little 2 week long Nutcracker.  oy!   It's over now, tonights our annual holiday-of-your-choice extravaganza.  Since it's actually solstice, we're tempted to throw in some pagen rituals...any suggestions?  DH says no to a ritual sacrifice to bring back the sun god, so that's out.  hahahhahah, jk...sort of *as I look outside to the gray Seattle day that isn't quite day on the shortest 'day' of the year*.


----------



## Poppinsme

We just got back from our 32nd anni. trip little over 2 weeks ago.  The Poly LVC was so fabulous and the signature restaurants superb.  Wish I was there now.  
Lets see how many people asked us how many children we had?  When we replied we were child free they seemed to be shocked that a couple our age "gasp" had NO children!  
We did get a real hoot out of watching so many children running there parents ragged. 
And WE were really surprised at how many children were obviously taken out of school for WDW.  That shocked us both.  When we were in school back in the dark ages you could never miss school unless you were sick or somebody died.  Just found that odd. 
All in all a glorious trip.


----------



## maddhatir

TXTurtles said:


> On a side note, am I the only one who doesn't see a someday wish for kids as being grounds for being voted off this thread?  Unless they start chiding all of us for not having anyone to visit us in our nursing homes.  Then I'll lead the voting.



Not sure how I would vote- I would say- they must be able to join in on the "oh how glorious it is not to have children" banter and mean it- if the feelings do not flow freely........

...............your outta here! 


and MY "oh how glorious it is not to have children- EV-VER" feelings are flowing all over the place!


----------



## Hixski

I have to go to Costco and Target today. I am procrastinating right now because I know they will be a zoo. I will just have to put on my kid proof clothes so all the screaming and whining will bounce off me. 

Hope everyone has a great holiday!!!!!


----------



## danv3

Had a family gathering at our house yesterday including a 2yo and a 7yo.  Crazy.  They only broke one thing and didn't pull down the tree, so that was a plus.  

Pretty sure DW is 100% on board with the DINKs lifesyle now.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Everyone is so on the money - this is a wonderful time to be childfree.

I just had to share this:
Friday at work a bunch of us are talking & my supervisor mentions she got her kids a Wii.  I think no big deal until she tells us that she paid several hundred dollars on e-bay plus $100 & change for shipping to get it in time for Christmas.
Her kids announced Friday on the way to school they wanted one.  So on top of everything else the were getting she practically spent an arm on making sure they had the Wii!  
Can you say spoiled kids?!?!?

My husband said I should have told her I wanted a raise for Christmas.  After all if she was granting every wish being made...


----------



## TKDisneylover

Poppinsme said:


> We just got back from our 32nd anni. trip little over 2 weeks ago.
> 
> And WE were really surprised at how many children were obviously taken out of school for WDW.  That shocked us both.  When we were in school back in the dark ages you could never miss school unless you were sick or somebody died.  Just found that odd.  All in all a glorious trip.



*Happy Anniversary!!*  We were also surprised at how many kids must have been taken out of school during the first week of December.  Especially with the Christmas break so close for them.   It definitely affected our decision to go back during the Christmas season, well that and the fact that there were tons of people with non-school age children too.  In the past we have been pretty lucky with early February & mid-October.



zima-cheryl said:


> My husband said I should have told her I wanted a raise for Christmas.  After all if she was granting every wish being made...



*I wonder how she would have responded that!?! *


HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!


----------



## pfalcioni

I think many of the kids that are at the parks during regular school time are home schooled.  Even though it's only about 2 1/2 percent of the school population, I think they would be a large part of the people who decide to vacation when other kids aren't!  At least, if I had kids and home schooled, I think that would be one of the benefits.

Also, I think many good parents do take kids out of school during non-critical times of the year.  Especially younger kids.  By high school, I don't think there is a 'non critical' time though!

My brother and sister in law will be going with us next year to DW, and we told them we wouldn't go during school breaks, so we'll be there on MLK weekend and beyond.  They'll miss 4 days of school, but they're not that worried about it.  We're happy they are willing to do this, because it'll be great fun experiencing the mouse with kids, but we're too spoiled to go when it's busy!

Of course, even though we love our nephews dearly, we'll still be staying at separate resorts, so we can have 'alone time' without looking rude!


----------



## ChisJo

TKDisneylover said:


> *We were also surprised at how many kids must have been taken out of school during the first week of December.  Especially with the Christmas break so close for them.   It definitely affected our decision to go back during the Christmas season, well that and the fact that there were tons of people with non-school age children too.  In the past we have been pretty lucky with early February & mid-October.*


*


I absolutely have to agree with you....The first week of December was by far the busiest time I have ever gone to WDW, but I always go during the down season. I truly thought this would be the quietest of all the trips I have gone. But, I guess with the sporting events going on, there would be more kids there. I just didn't think it would be as busy as it was. I'm happy that others agree with my perspective...I was worried that others might not have thought that!*


----------



## BigGreen73

ChisJo said:


> I absolutely have to agree with you....The first week of December was by far the busiest time I have ever gone to WDW, but I always go during the down season. I truly thought this would be the quietest of all the trips I have gone. But, I guess with the sporting events going on, there would be more kids there. I just didn't think it would be as busy as it was. I'm happy that others agree with my perspective...I was worried that others might not have thought that!



We went to WDW from 12/08-12/15, we have no kids, and didn't think it was any different from when we go in May. My DW and I have visited WDW during the 1st week of May the last few years. Same busy periods, pretty much the same wait times etc. It was not as slow as everyone made it out to be.

I blame all the guides and Disney websites for this. These guides emphasize the "down times" and advise to visit during these times, more and more people are pulling kids from school now to visit during these times of year.


----------



## TKDisneylover

ChisJo said:


> I absolutely have to agree with you....The first week of December was by far the busiest time I have ever gone to WDW, but I always go during the down season. I truly thought this would be the quietest of all the trips I have gone. But, I guess with the sporting events going on, there would be more kids there. I just didn't think it would be as busy as it was. I'm happy that others agree with my perspective...I was worried that others might not have thought that!



*What month and week have you gone in the past and experienced lower attendance?  I'm just curious because we are debating whether to go back in February, October or another time.  Feb. & Oct. were two times we have gone and experienced lower attendance.  I have to say I think our favorite was the second week of February, DH & I went with my sister & brother-in-law and all the rides were walk-ons throughout our entire visit.  We had a great time and it gave us a chance to get away from the cold weather!*



BigGreen73 said:


> I blame all the guides and Disney websites for this. These guides emphasize the "down times" and advise to visit during these times, more and more people are pulling kids from school now to visit during these times of year.



You may be right about this.  I would think it would definitely appeal to many parents bring to bring kids during an advertised down time & *pfalcioni* may have a point also with the home schooled kids too.  We purchased Tour Guide Mike this visit (mostly out of curiosity), and did not follow him our first 3days because we were with people who had specific parks in mind for the days they were visiting and went with their choices.  It was crazy busy each park we went to.  But when our friends left and we followd TGM the rest of our visit we experienced a considerably lower crowds for the parks he recommended.  I've also done fine using Birnbaums in the past and have been very satisfied.

I also wonder how much difference the "free" dining & dining plan options have made with people attending at different times?


----------



## ChisJo

TKDisneylover said:


> What month and week have you gone in the past and experienced lower attendance?  I'm just curious because we are debating whether to go back in February, October or another time.  Feb. & Oct. were two times we have gone and experienced lower attendance.  I have to say I think our favorite was the second week of February, DH & I went with my sister & brother-in-law and all the rides were walk-ons throughout our entire visit.  We had a great time and it gave us a chance to get away from the cold weather!
> 
> My absolute favorite time of the whole year to go is around the 22 of August. An absolute walk on to most rides. I loved it! Kids are back in school, the September long weekend isn't that close that it affects the crowd attendance, and the weather, well at least for me, is PERFECT! I loved it. Also went at the end of April, and that wasn't too bad either. October was good (second week), but I truly thought that the first week of December would be the deadest - but it just goes to show that there is no such thing as quiet at Disney. It was truly the busiest time I have ever gone.


----------



## MapleGirl

Our trip is less than a month away!  Woot!!!   

We always go in January.  The weather is cool and there are no lines to speak of.  I think we've also gone in March and again there were no lines.  For that matter, I don't remember EVER going to Disney and having it be crowded!   Maybe my definition of 'crowded' is skewed since I'm always so happy to be there (and I never have to drag along cranky kids through the lines!).  

Anyway married, child-free and loving life.  I have my packing list all set to go and my crazy planning is in the final stages.  Another reason for cats instead of kids, we can leave them at home with a big bowl of food and they're fine.  Our first anniversary is January 6th (we honeymooned in WDW, of course).   We'll be there January 24th.  Would it be wrong to tell the CM's this is our anniversary trip?  What does everyone think about this?

I visited a childhood friend and her baby this weekend.  Cute, well behaved baby boy.  I was happy to note that although I enjoyed having him sit on my knee and smile up at me, I had no desire to have one of my own.  Hurray!  Perhaps I will be spared the dreaded biological clock syndrome.  Here's hoping.  I'm 25, do you think the desire would have kicked in by now?  Who's not in their 20's and still childless?  You are my inspiration!

Enjoy your freedom!


----------



## TKDisneylover

MapleGirl said:


> Our trip is less than a month away!  Woot!!!   *I hope you have a wonderful Anniversary trip, you'll be there before you know it!!*
> 
> We always go in January. *This is good to know, maybe we will consider this time of year also.  It makes sense right after the holiday break for kids that it would be less crowded.* The weather is cool and there are no lines to speak of.  I think we've also gone in March and again there were no lines.  For that matter, I don't remember EVER going to Disney and having it be crowded!   Maybe my definition of 'crowded' is skewed since I'm always so happy to be there (and I never have to drag along cranky kids through the lines!).
> 
> Anyway married, child-free and loving life.  I have my packing list all set to go and my crazy planning is in the final stages.  Another reason for cats instead of kids, we can leave them at home with a big bowl of food and they're fine.  Our first anniversary is January 6th (we honeymooned in WDW, of course).   We'll be there January 24th.  Would it be wrong to tell the CM's this is our anniversary trip? *Absolutely not!!  Definitely call them now and let them know at your resort that you will be there celebrating your anniversary.  We did this and they had Anniversary pins for us to wear at the check-in desk.  We received many well wishes from cast members in every park and we received 2 free desserts at different restaurants in the parks.  Take advantage and ENJOY!!* What does everyone think about this?*Go for it! *
> 
> I visited a childhood friend and her baby this weekend.  Cute, well behaved baby boy.  I was happy to note that although I enjoyed having him sit on my knee and smile up at me, I had no desire to have one of my own.  Hurray!  Perhaps I will be spared the dreaded biological clock syndrome.  Here's hoping.  I'm 25, do you think the desire would have kicked in by now?  Who's not in their 20's and still childless?*Well I have to be completely honest here, we are in our 40's, but when I was about 30 I had a small desire to "consider" having a child.  DH & I even went to a counselor to discuss it.  He was still completely against it (which he was from the day we met), and the counselor helped me understand his point of view.  I accepted it because I love him very much and would never pressure him into anything he did not want to do.  It did not take long after that for my feelings about having a child to disappear.  Not sure why this popped into my brain, maybe it was some weird freakish PMS thing, who knows?!  But I am truly thankful every day that I chose not to have kids!!*  You are my inspiration!
> 
> Enjoy your freedom!




*Again, have a wonderful vacation and Happy Anniversary! *


----------



## nena

I thought I would share with you, our school's attendance policy.  

If children are going to miss 5 days or more, they can go to the attendance office and pick up an Independent Study Packet.  The parent, student, teacher and principal all have to sign the Independent Study Agreement.  It states that the student must complete the study packet in order to remain at our school, not necessarily in the same class.  As a teacher I have not signed some ISA, because the child is performing below grade level or already has a truancy issue.  Other students, I will sign for, because they are rarely absent and are performing @ or above grade level.  
Don't get me wrong, I do not believe the study packet takes the place of in class instruction.  But its better for them to work on something, than just get a week off.  I always have my homework packets copied a month in advance, so I send that with them too.
If other districts are like ours, this may answer why so many children are pulled out to go to WDW.
As for my own children, they received perfect attendance certificates for the first trimestre at the end of November.  Because they are performing above grade level I have thought about pulling them out for a week to go to WDW during the Free Dining Plan.
I hope my long story helps explain why you saw so many kids.


----------



## maddhatir

This mother is a freaking disgrace!

Girl wins concert tickets with essay faking dad's death in Iraq


----------



## Hixski

That is really pathetic!!!! If they don't take the tickets away then these people will know they can do whatever they can and still get away with it. That 6 yr old will grow up thinking it is ok to lie and cheat to get whatever she wants. Very sad.

On a happier note......

*Happy New Years to everyone!!!!*


----------



## maddhatir

*Happy New Year! *


----------



## TKDisneylover

*HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!* ​


----------



## chrisw127

I've never understood why people care about others decisions to have kids or not.  Sometimes I suspect that parents who are pushy and rude towards their friends without children aren't that happy with their decision to have kids in the first place.  And I have three kids.  But I spent years in grad school and then as a lawyer (and if you ever want to meet some childfee women, that's the place to be) and so I know what it's like to be creeping into your mid-30s and not have kids and to have people make obnoxious statements about your lifestyle (even though frankly, I didn't have kids at the time because I wanted to make sure I was ready).  

When I had my first child, I definitely had a stronger appreciation for my friends who chose not to procreate because I finally knew how hard it was to raise a child.  I adore my kids.  I think I was meant to be a mother, which came as a huge surprise because I was not the most maternal person prior to having them. But does that make my choices any more valid than my best friend, who has decided that she'd rather live childfree and has never for a moment doubted her choice?  (she's a great "auntie" by the way but I would NEVER ask her to change a diaper).  I totally respect her choice.  It's not selfish at all.  And it's not immature.  It's being honest with yourself about how you want to live. Good for them.

Oh, to the poster above who mentioned kids being at Disney during the slower times of the year? Where I live (in NC) we have year-round school (helps with overcrowding) so the kids are off for several weeks at a time during the year.  It's apparently catching on in different parts of the country as well.


----------



## 3DisneyKids

Due to promotions like Free Dining, etc. there are almost NO real downtimes anymore like there once was.

Someone above posted late August...yes, this used to be good.  We went this past August...most crowded we have ever seen the parks.  Just awful.  Remember that the northern schools don't start back until after labor day.

Sept. used to be great...not so much now that there is free dining.

I think in only hold out remaining is literally THIS WEEK.  Starting about January 4th and going to right before MLK week-end will be the lowest times of the year.

The days of empty parks are gone...


----------



## WDWguru

Have you guys seen this? Victoria and Albert's is banning kids under 10 as of January 1! Great move!

http://blogs.orlandosentinel.com/business_tourism_aviation/2008/01/no-young-childr.html


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:


> Have you guys seen this? Victoria and Albert's is banning kids under 10 as of January 1! Great move!
> 
> http://blogs.orlandosentinel.com/business_tourism_aviation/2008/01/no-young-childr.html



I have never been to V&A- but GOOD FOR DISNEY!!!! 

OMG- I think someone should post this on another thread to make "others" aware of our good furtune! 

unless........WDWguru did her civic "childfree duty" and already spread the word??


----------



## WDWguru

I'm looking around for other threads - will post to the dining and Theme Parks boards if there isn't something there already.

Hopefully this is just the start. I'd love to see them do something similar at Jiko and California Grill - maybe no kids under 10 after 9 pm or something.


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:


> I'm looking around for other threads - will post to the dining and Theme Parks boards if there isn't something there already.
> 
> Hopefully this is just the start. I'd love to see them do something similar at Jiko and California Grill - maybe no kids under 10 after 9 pm or something.



oooo- and just MAYBE you should advise the people on the family thread of this news....you never know, they MAY be interested.....
hee hee


----------



## WDWguru

I'm scared to even go in there maddhatir - but feel free 

I just posted the news to the Theme Parks and the restaurants boards as nobody else had yet. Now to sit back with some popcorn...


----------



## Hixski

WDWguru said:


> I'm looking around for other threads - will post to the dining and Theme Parks boards if there isn't something there already.
> 
> Hopefully this is just the start. I'd love to see them do something similar at Jiko and California Grill - maybe no kids under 10 after 9 pm or something.



Those threads are sure to get locked after everyone gets done fighting over there. I will have to check them out later. Thanks for the FYI.


----------



## ChisJo

Please post the link for the thread on the THeme Parks board about the V&A movement....I would like to see the backlash on this one!


----------



## WDWguru

I posted it on Theme Parks but the mods moved it to restaurants where it merged with my other thread. I appealed to the mod that moved it, saying the discussion of adults-only stuff on property has come up there many times, but they won't move it back.


----------



## WDWguru

It took a while, but this one's starting to get juicy... http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?p=22410810


----------



## Hixski

WDWguru said:


> It took a while, but this one's starting to get juicy... http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?p=22410810



I jumped in with adding a couple more restaurants. Let's see how that goes over.


----------



## TKDisneylover

WDWguru said:


> Have you guys seen this? Victoria and Albert's is banning kids under 10 as of January 1! Great move!
> 
> http://blogs.orlandosentinel.com/business_tourism_aviation/2008/01/no-young-childr.html



This is awesome!  I definitely hope they extend this by adding a few more signature restaurants!  I was amazed when we decided to have a late dinner after the Cirque du Soleil show and went for dinner at Bongo's.  A family of four were seated next to us, they had about a 4 year old and 6 month old.  The baby cried through half of our meal, we could not wait to get out of there!  It would be so nice to enjoy a romantic meal for once, unfortunately we can't afford V&A's.


----------



## MapleGirl

> I would like to see restaurants have two sections: "children" and "non-children" (similar to smoking/non-smoking).  This way families with children can enjoy the restaurant when they want without getting the evil eye from other patrons, and childless families can enjoy their meal without having children running around and what not.  And please don't tell me that childless families can go to the bar, I think adults deserve a nice table too.  It's important that these two rooms be separated by a wall.  I would also like to see airlines have flights that are child-free.


 
I posted this on the restaurant board.  What I did not add, is that I would love to see a few days where Disney was closed to anyone under 18.  Can you imagine?!


----------



## KirklandTutu

Oh lord, I just responded after four martinis.


----------



## NEVERENOUGHWDW

I hate that parents traveling with children insist on staying in the restuarant with over tired, screaming children.
If your child is "acting out" how does anyone have the nerve to go into a restaurant and ruin everyone's night?

What a concept if Disney would open just one signature restaurant that does not allow children


----------



## TKDisneylover

KirklandTutu said:


> Oh lord, I just responded after four martinis.



 After four martinis you did a pretty darn good job getting your point across, and I didn't notice any slurring!   There is quite the melodramatics going on over there right now, very interesting.



NEVERENOUGHWDW said:


> I hate that parents traveling with children insist on staying in the restuarant with over tired, screaming children.
> If your child is "acting out" how does anyone have the nerve to go into a restaurant and ruin everyone's night?
> 
> What a concept if Disney would open just one signature restaurant that does not allow children



I completely agree with you.  It's only one restaurant but I would love to see more.  Or, using the time limit system where after 8:00 they would not allow under 10.  When we started going to Pleasure Island we were so happy we had one small portion of Disney to be away from kids for a little while.  Now even that has changed and the parents bring the kids into the clubs, so that is no longer an option.  In the grand scheme of things I'm sure Disney would not lose a ton of money over a few signature restaurants being adults only, or adults only after a certain time.


----------



## jumoo044

Hi Guys!  I really haven't had to endure many people questioning why my hubby and I haven't had kids, but something happened the other day, I just had to share!  
There's a guy at work I don't really know, just to say hi to.  Well the other day he asked me how my Christmas went.  I said great.  He said, "How many children do you have?"  I said, " None."  He looked at me like, What?!!  "You're married, aren't you?"  "Yes", I said, "but we don't have any kids."  He said, "Well, it's okay to wait a little while, my wife and I waited 10 years before we had our child.  So I'm sure it will happen.  How long have you been married?"  I said, "19 years."  He said, "Oh?.......Oh!"  (I don't think he realised how old I am, I'm 44, but look younger.) I said, "Yeah...I don't think we'll be having any children."  He kind of skulked off.  Now whenever he sees me, he looks all embarrassed.


----------



## Hixski

TKDisneylover said:


> After four martinis you did a pretty darn good job getting your point across, and I didn't notice any slurring!   There is quite the melodramatics going on over there right now, very interesting.



Melodramtics is an understatement. They have now gone to comparing it to the banning of Jews in WWII and the holocaust.


----------



## kmmccart75

Hixski said:


> Melodramtics is an understatement. They have now gone to comparing it to the banning of Jews in WWII and the holocaust.



OMG -  I had to go read it after hearing that!  The first few pages are kind of boring, just reasonable people making reasonable statements.  But then, all of a sudden.....crazy talk!


----------



## NEVERENOUGHWDW

TKDisneylover said:


> After four martinis you did a pretty darn good job getting your point across, and I didn't notice any slurring!   There is quite the melodramatics going on over there right now, very interesting.
> 
> 
> 
> I completely agree with you.  It's only one restaurant but I would love to see more.  Or, using the time limit system where after 8:00 they would not allow under 10.  When we started going to Pleasure Island we were so happy we had one small portion of Disney to be away from kids for a little while.  Now even that has changed and the parents bring the kids into the clubs, so that is no longer an option.  In the grand scheme of things I'm sure Disney would not lose a ton of money over a few signature restaurants being adults only, or adults only after a certain time.[/quot
> 
> Actually I think they would make more money. DH & I seek out V&As just so we can have a quiet night of dining not eating with a side order of crying and screaming.
> We used to find peace at CG...that is long gone. Yachtsman is not quiet anymore and Narcossee's we lost a long time ago.
> I would even venture and say that an increase in pricing + a dress code would really make for a booked adult dining experience.
> Would love to see Disney take notice of this and do a study group...(one can dream).


----------



## BigGreen73

jumoo044 said:


> Hi Guys!  I really haven't had to endure many people questioning why my hubby and I haven't had kids, but something happened the other day, I just had to share!
> There's a guy at work I don't really know, just to say hi to.  Well the other day he asked me how my Christmas went.  I said great.  He said, "How many children do you have?"  I said, " None."  He looked at me like, What?!!  "You're married, aren't you?"  "Yes", I said, "but we don't have any kids."  He said, "Well, it's okay to wait a little while, my wife and I waited 10 years before we had our child.  So I'm sure it will happen.  How long have you been married?"  I said, "19 years."  He said, "Oh?.......Oh!"  (I don't think he realised how old I am, I'm 44, but look younger.) I said, "Yeah...I don't think we'll be having any children."  He kind of skulked off.  Now whenever he sees me, he looks all embarrassed.




Hi from a Mainer to a Mainer. Funny story. Some people just cannot comprehend that not all married couples want kids. My wife and I are both 34 and we've been married for over 10 years. No kids, and don't want em.


----------



## Hixski

Welcome to the dark side to all the new childfree folks!!!


----------



## Hixski

darn duplicate post


----------



## MapleGirl

Today is DH and my first anniversary.  Right now we're sitting on the couch playing Kingdom Hearts 2 (a Disney video game) and eating year old wedding cake.  Life is good.


----------



## WDWguru

Looks like the community board just heard about V&A... http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1678405

Congrats MapleGirl!


----------



## NEVERENOUGHWDW

MapleGirl said:


> Today is DH and my first anniversary.  Right now we're sitting on the couch playing Kingdom Hearts 2 (a Disney video game) and eating year old wedding cake.  Life is good.



Enjoy every bite of that cake!!!!!! Happy 1st!!!!

We used to live in Boston...we miss is so much!


----------



## BigGreen73

MapleGirl said:


> Today is DH and my first anniversary.  Right now we're sitting on the couch playing Kingdom Hearts 2 (a Disney video game) and eating year old wedding cake.  Life is good.




Sounds like my kind of Anniversary Celebration. Congrats.


----------



## maddhatir

Happy Anniversary MapleGirl! 

And welcome new CF peoples! 

I can't believe how the V7A thread has taken off- last time I checked it was only 2 pages- and now!? 

I think I may need to put on my flame suit- I posted over there that to me, annoying drunks and annoying kids are pretty much the same in my book 

I would not like to put up with either while dining or in the parks!


----------



## MapleGirl

Thanks for your good wishes everyone!   

maddhatir - good post on the V&A thread!!  It makes me SO MAD   when self-righteous breeders say that Disney is only for children.  I should NOT have to endure obnoxious children and their oblivious parents on my vacation or anywhere else.  Yes, Disney attracts children, but last I checked anyone who wants to pay can get in the gates and Disney is pushing the adult aspect of the resorts.  This goes beyond Disney too.  We live in such a child-centric culture.  Children should be taught good manners and to respect the restrictions placed upon them.  Children do NOT belong everywhere that adults go.  Your decision to breed should not affect my dinner, vacation, movie, etc...  In fact, people should be taxed for having kids.   


Ok, I'm getting a little steamed.  Guess I'll take a chill-pill!


----------



## MapleGirl

Hey maddhatir, 
Who's the guy in your signature?


----------



## maddhatir

MapleGirl said:


> Hey maddhatir,
> Who's the guy in your signature?



You get outta town! That's Mr Depp! 

Wait- Can you see the full pic? I always wonder if my siggy fits into the new siggy size box we have! 

...and that little floaty bunny looking thingy is me when I look at him! He makes me floaty!


----------



## MapleGirl

maddhatir said:


> You get outta town! That's Mr Depp!
> 
> Wait- Can you see the full pic? I always wonder if my siggy fits into the new siggy size box we have!
> 
> ...and that little floaty bunny looking thingy is me when I look at him! He makes me floaty!



Oh good, that's who I thought it was (but I didn't want to say anything in case it was your super dreamy nephew or something!).  It's a great picture.  It always makes me blush when I see it.    Have you seen Sweeny Todd?  It looks fantastic!


----------



## ChisJo

MapleGirl said:


> Have you seen Sweeny Todd?  It looks fantastic!



Sweeny Todd AWESOME! Loved every moment of it...was a little gruesome and extremely dark, but Johnny Depp did such an amazing job....I didn't know the story so the ending was very surprising to me. 

I recommend it to all who aren't afraid of a little blood!


----------



## Hixski

MapleGirl said:


> Oh good, that's who I thought it was (but I didn't want to say anything in case it was your super dreamy nephew or something!).  It's a great picture.  It always makes me blush when I see it.    Have you seen Sweeny Todd?  It looks fantastic!



Madd has more pictures of Mr. Depp than Disney has screaming kids in their restaurants.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Madd has more pictures of Mr. Depp than Disney has screaming kids in their restaurants.



   

MapleGirl- I am sorry- I hated Sweeney! Mr Depp did an incredible job singing though! 

The blood was no big deal- I call it Tim Burton blood- very bright red- not real at all- I found the way the bodies landed in the basement more disturbing than the blood Everytime Sweeney would slit a throat and send a body -down- DH would make a noise like- "awww" when it would it the floor 

I have to say I am NOT a fan of musicals- but a JD fan- that is the only reason I saw it. SO- with that said- if you are a fan of musicals- you probably will like it.


----------



## MapleGirl

maddhatir said:


> MapleGirl- I am sorry- I hated Sweeney! Mr Depp did an incredible job singing though!
> 
> The blood was no big deal- I call it Tim Burton blood- very bright red- not real at all- I found the way the bodies landed in the basement more disturbing than the blood Everytime Sweeney would slit a throat and send a body -down- DH would make a noise like- "awww" when it would it the floor
> 
> I have to say I am NOT a fan of musicals- but a JD fan- that is the only reason I saw it. SO- with that said- if you are a fan of musicals- you probably will like it.



I would like to see it (I love musicals ), but I can't deal with blood, violence, cruelty, etc....  For some reason movie/TV violence affects me on a very visceral level.    Wish I could see it though.  I'd like to see JP and Helena Boneham Carter (is that her name?) singing!


----------



## MapleGirl

By the way, has anyone met/interacted with the Jack Sparrow in WDW?  How is he?  I've seen him from afar (see pic below), but I'm really looking forward to getting my picture with him at the Pirates and Princess Party!


----------



## NEVERENOUGHWDW

MapleGirl said:


> By the way, has anyone met/interacted with the Jack Sparrow in WDW?  How is he?  I've seen him from afar (see pic below), but I'm really looking forward to getting my picture with him at the Pirates and Princess Party!



Yes twice....one was during the day and he was walking around the exit of Pirates. The other was at MVMCP and he was just a character you waited online for....he was in that small space behind the Christmas Shoppe and there were only to people online...they really had him tucked away.


----------



## maddhatir

I am bringing this quote over here from the V&A thread b/c I do not want the thread to get OT- or start a CF war..



littleprincessmom said:


> I couldn't agree more with nuttylawprofessor on all counts.
> 
> I have 2 DDs - one 8 and one 5.  The 8 year old has been going to 4 and 5 star restaurants since she was 2.  *She is a very quiet child whose favorite pastime is reading and loves being with adults*.  We took her to New York for her 6th birthday b/c she wanted to see shows and go to nice restaurants.  My DD5 is a typical 5 year old.  She is well behaved (for the most part) but certainly has her moments - thankfully, however, not of the running around the table or screaming type.
> 
> One reason we enjoy WDW so much is that we can have nice meals at the signature restaurants and bring DDs (when they desire - other nights they've chosen to go to one of the deluxe resort's kids clubs) and they can enjoy a kid's meal and special drinks/desserts.  We ALWAYS bring things for them to do at restaurants - coloring, stickerbooks, video games turned to 0 volume, etc., and do not expect them to sit for 1 1/2 - 2 hours and engage in "adult" conversation.  We order quickly and don't linger over dinner.  My kids have eaten at Jiko, Flyiing Fish, California Grill, etc....
> 
> All of this being said, I have NO problem with the policy at V&A.  I've eaten there (once) and it was a truly special evening.  I can't imagine anyone even wanting to take a child there - my kids - who have significant experience with "fine dining" would be miserable and would eventually begin to whine (albeit quietly) affecting the dining experiences of those around them.
> 
> Should kids under a certain age be "banned?"  I can see where that sounds terrible but if people used common sense and didn't bring children who are too young to enjoy the experience to begin with, it wouldn't be an issue.



I am confused about people like this- WHY do they think just b/c the child likes to be around adults-- that adults wish to be around children in a certain situation!? 

I know someone like this- We can plan an "adult" b-day dinner or get together at a restaurant for a friend and she insists that her children would just LOVE to come!

I have a feeling the kids can care less- she just can't be without her kids!

When kids are at the table it seems to become all about them, no matter how old they are. I like to have adult conversation- not a conversation with a kid about Hannah Montana for 2 hours b/c they won't shut up! or if the child is small- and the parent, every 5 minutes has to be doing something for the child and we all have to stop our conversation etc. while they attend to them kid.


----------



## zima-cheryl

jumoo044 said:


> (I don't think he realised how old I am, I'm 44, but look younger.)



I've had that happen a few times to me - one guy guessed I was in my 20's not too long ago (I'm 38).   

One thing about not having kids - keeps you looking younger!   

I realize I'm a bit late replying to Jumoo's comment, but we were away this weekend so I'm catching up on the thread.  Hubby's company holiday party was at the Marriott in Hartford.  We had a room & a lovely weekend!  Again - something we couldn't do if we had "units" (as DH refers to kids).

And as for V&A - 3 cheers!!!   
Now I vote for a kid free hotel (or even just a wing or a floor).


----------



## NEVERENOUGHWDW

I would settle for 1 kid free restaurant.......ahhhhhhh.


----------



## maddhatir

NEVERENOUGHWDW said:


> I would settle for 1 kid free restaurant.......ahhhhhhh.



Now- if only it were an affordable restaurant everyone frequents!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Everytime Sweeney would slit a throat and send a body -down- DH would make a noise like- "awww" when it would it the floor



I don't know why but as soon as I read this the song "Bodies" by Drowning Pool came into my head.  The main chorus in the song is "Let the bodies hit the floor," which they repeat over and over and over.  I'm havn't seen the movie yet (but plan to), nor am I a heavy metal fan.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I don't know why but as soon as I read this the song "Bodies" by Drowning Pool came into my head.  The main chorus in the song is "Let the bodies hit the floor," which they repeat over and over and over.  I'm havn't seen the movie yet (but plan to), nor am I a heavy metal fan.



OMG I LOVE THAT SONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

Actually when we went to see Sweeney one of the movies they previewed- I forget which one, it was a war movie, was playing that song in it!!!!

I was just singing it today! Mom was telling me how her kitty almost slid off the TV and she had to grab her- I looked at her kitty and started singing. "let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor" 

Of course, kitty just looked at me like I was nuts!


----------



## maddhatir

All I have to say about the V&A thread is.....

 WillCAD!!!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> OMG I LOVE THAT SONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> Actually when we went to see Sweeney one of the movies they previewed- I forget which one, it was a war movie, was playing that song in it!!!!
> 
> I was just singing it today! Mom was telling me how her kitty almost slid off the TV and she had to grab her- I looked at her kitty and started singing. "let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor"
> 
> Of course, kitty just looked at me like I was nuts!


----------



## MapleGirl

DH usually goes on a business trip every year to attend a conference and I go with him.  This year he's thinking he might want to try another conference (He's been going to the same one for a few years now).  Is it wrong of me to look for a conference held in WDW that might apply to him?   Any one know of any that are in 2008 and have to do with IT/education?   

I know, I know.  It's an abuse of company $$, but a girl's got to try!


----------



## ChisJo

maddhatir said:


> All I have to say about the V&A thread is.....
> 
> WillCAD!!!!



Amen to that! That thread has me laughing....seriously, the majority agree on that thread, yet someone (no names) seems to be beating an already dead horse! Can't wait to see what tomorrow brings!


----------



## maddhatir

Yeah!

I booked a Mexico vacation last night for DH and I through Apple! 

A week of doing nothing but lying on the beach, swimming, snorkling, eating and drinking!

We have been waiting for a good deal- but as the weather gets colder- the prices keep going up! I told DH we better hurry or we will must the bus!

We are staying at the Grand Sirenis Riviera Maya 2/2 thru 2/9 before I booked anything I was checking Trip Advisor, I always do when booking anything- geez, those people are harsh- but I am one of those who go right to the negative reviews. An dif there are too many, forget it no matter how nice the place looks. 

When I checked TA for this place- the possitive FAR outweighed the negative so that is why I picked it. We stayed at the Grand Oasis and the RIU in Cancun and the RIU Palace in Playa before and loved all of them- but we just wanted to try someplace different.

The only thing that I am not real happy about is- the hotel is ULTRA-ULTRA modern- I am not a modern kinda gal- but if that is my only dislike- I am happy!


----------



## ChisJo

maddhatir said:


> Yeah!
> 
> I booked a Mexico vacation last night for DH and I through Apple!
> 
> A week of doing nothing but lying on the beach, swimming, snorkling, eating and drinking!



Have fun Madd! We just booked a trip to Montreal (we live on the opposite side of Canada) so my DBF can go see his favorite hockey team play their final 2 games of the regular season - won't even tell you what we paid for the tickets! But, he is really excited! And that makes me happy! I love that city too....It is gorgeous!


----------



## NEVERENOUGHWDW

maddhatir said:


> Yeah!
> 
> I booked a Mexico vacation last night for DH and I through Apple!
> 
> A week of doing nothing but lying on the beach, swimming, snorkling, eating and drinking!
> 
> We have been waiting for a good deal- but as the weather gets colder- the prices keep going up! I told DH we better hurry or we will must the bus!
> 
> We are staying at the Grand Sirenis Riviera Maya 2/2 thru 2/9 before I booked anything I was checking Trip Advisor, I always do when booking anything- geez, those people are harsh- but I am one of those who go right to the negative reviews. An dif there are too many, forget it no matter how nice the place looks.
> 
> When I checked TA for this place- the possitive FAR outweighed the negative so that is why I picked it. We stayed at the Grand Oasis and the RIU in Cancun and the RIU Palace in Playa before and loved all of them- but we just wanted to try someplace different.
> 
> The only thing that I am not real happy about is- the hotel is ULTRA-ULTRA modern- I am not a modern kinda gal- but if that is my only dislike- I am happy!



That hotel looks great (I think anything with palm trees is a good place to be).

Has anyone been to the Hyatt in Aruba since it was refurbished?


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Yeah!
> 
> I booked a Mexico vacation last night for DH and I through Apple!
> 
> A week of doing nothing but lying on the beach, swimming, snorkling, eating and drinking!
> 
> We have been waiting for a good deal- but as the weather gets colder- the prices keep going up! I told DH we better hurry or we will must the bus!
> 
> We are staying at the Grand Sirenis Riviera Maya 2/2 thru 2/9 before I booked anything I was checking Trip Advisor, I always do when booking anything- geez, those people are harsh- but I am one of those who go right to the negative reviews. An dif there are too many, forget it no matter how nice the place looks.
> 
> When I checked TA for this place- the possitive FAR outweighed the negative so that is why I picked it. We stayed at the Grand Oasis and the RIU in Cancun and the RIU Palace in Playa before and loved all of them- but we just wanted to try someplace different.
> 
> The only thing that I am not real happy about is- the hotel is ULTRA-ULTRA modern- I am not a modern kinda gal- but if that is my only dislike- I am happy!



Hey have a great time!!!  And how nice you can start packing your bags already.  I do the same as you and hit TA to check the place out.  Havn't done a resort in a long time.  We went to Mexico in June '07 and stayed in a small boutique hotel right off 5th Av in Playa del Carmen.  It's a much different atmosphere from the all-inclusive.  Had a great time and would go back in a heartbeat but since we just got back from an expensive WDW trip it will have to wait. 

I can just see myself sitting on the beach now.......check it out!
http://www.playa.info/webcam-playa-palms.html


----------



## MapleGirl

Mad - I am super jealous.  I've been wanting to go to an All-Inclusive with DH for years.  Maybe I'll plan that instead of our next WDW trip.....  We'll see.  

Hey Chris, who is Montreal playing?  Have a great trip!!!


----------



## Hixski

I just popped over to the Families board to see if they had a thread about V&A's. The one they have is only 3 pages and believe it or not they are mostly for it. Sounds like the parents on the Family board are more reasonable then the ones responding on the other boards. Or at least the ones responding.


----------



## ChisJo

MapleGirl said:


> Mad - I am super jealous.  I've been wanting to go to an All-Inclusive with DH for years.  Maybe I'll plan that instead of our next WDW trip.....  We'll see.
> 
> Hey Chris, who is Montreal playing?  Have a great trip!!!



Game #1 is against Buffallo, and game #2 is against Toronto (this is the game he really wants to see!). BF is very excited...I am too in a way. I really like Montreal!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Hey have a great time!!!  And how nice you can start packing your bags already.  I do the same as you and hit TA to check the place out.  Havn't done a resort in a long time.  We went to Mexico in June '07 and stayed in a small boutique hotel right off 5th Av in Playa del Carmen.  It's a much different atmosphere from the all-inclusive.  Had a great time and would go back in a heartbeat but since we just got back from an expensive WDW trip it will have to wait.
> 
> I can just see myself sitting on the beach now.......check it out!
> http://www.playa.info/webcam-playa-palms.html



Tammy- I saw a few of the boutique hotels when I was searching for a place to stay- some of them are ADORABLE! They remind me of B&Bs- DH and I like B&Bs when traveling to places like, Rhode Island, Cape Cod, Savannah, Charleston- 

However- he likes the all-inclusives in Merico- we are piggies and like the endless food and drink 

I am crossing my fingers that since this is a 5*- they have free flowing champagne! I love champagne! 

We stayed at the RIU Cancun one year and they did not offer it- however, we were upgraded to the RIU Palace in Playa del Carmen and they had champagne for me all the time!


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> Have fun Madd! We just booked a trip to Montreal (we live on the opposite side of Canada) so my DBF can go see his favorite hockey team play their final 2 games of the regular season - won't even tell you what we paid for the tickets! But, he is really excited! And that makes me happy! I love that city too....It is gorgeous!




Sounds fun! So when is the trip?

I would love to go and see the Flyers when we go to Florida- but it never pans out. 

When I watch the Flyer's games and they are out of town- I just cannot believe the amount of fans that travel all over to see them! I mean- ALL over! Sometimes I have to stop and think if we are playing home b/c of the loud cheers going on when we score- no- we are away!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Tammy- I saw a few of the boutique hotels when I was searching for a place to stay- some of them are ADORABLE! They remind me of B&Bs- DH and I like B&Bs when traveling to places like, Rhode Island, Cape Cod, Savannah, Charleston-
> 
> However- he likes the all-inclusives in Merico- we are piggies and like the endless food and drink
> 
> I am crossing my fingers that since this is a 5*- they have free flowing champagne! I love champagne!



This is the one we stayed at:Playa-Maya

They included breakfast every morning but that was it, but we only paid $99 a night and one night free for a 7-night stay (we stayed 8).  I know what you mean about the all-inclusive though, we stayed at a Sandal's in Jamaica and really enjoyed all the unlimited food and beverage.

Good luck with the champagne!  I'm a champagne lovin' woman too, especially as a Mimosa.  I LOVE drinking Mimosa's in the morning for breakfast, and of course those are the day I don't make it out of my pj's.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> This is the one we stayed at:Playa-Maya
> 
> They included breakfast every morning but that was it, but we only paid $99 a night and one night free for a 7-night stay (we stayed 8).  I know what you mean about the all-inclusive though, we stayed at a Sandal's in Jamaica and really enjoyed all the unlimited food and beverage.
> 
> Good luck with the champagne!  I'm a champagne lovin' woman too, especially as a Mimosa.  I LOVE drinking Mimosa's in the morning for breakfast, and of course those are the day I don't make it out of my pj's.




Tammy, the hotel looks beautiful! 

Actually I think DH would not mind staying in a hotel like that- b/c he likes to get the "feel" of a place! And what is good with that- you can go and try the local cuisine- not just your "buffet" and so called "mexican" cuisine that they serve at the big hotels. 

I am going to tell him about it tonight- not that we will be changing our plans- but I think he would like something like that next time! It also seems so romantic!

About the champagne- we have a restaurant the next town over called Swanky Bubbles! I am DYING to go there and try the champagne bar! I know they have another location in the city- Philadelphia, and now we have one 10 minutes form our house- I have to go!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Tammy, the hotel looks beautiful!
> 
> Actually I think DH would not mind staying in a hotel like that- b/c he likes to get the "feel" of a place! And what is good with that- you can go and try the local cuisine- not just your "buffet" and so called "mexican" cuisine that they serve at the big hotels.
> 
> I am going to tell him about it tonight- not that we will be changing our plans- but I think he would like something like that next time! It also seems so romantic!
> 
> About the champagne- we have a restaurant the next town over called Swanky Bubbles! I am DYING to go there and try the champagne bar! I know they have another location in the city- Philadelphia, and now we have one 10 minutes form our house- I have to go!



It is a romantic place to go and you do get to eat the real Mexican food not the tex-mex stuff the all-inclusives "think" we want.  We're hoping to go back next year sometime.  Another thing too is that the hotel gave us each large bottles of bottled water to fill whenever they emptied, but I did use the tap water to brush my teeth with absolutely no problems.  Same with the food in town too, never once did I have any problems!

A CHAMPAGNE BAR!!!  I'm jealous!  We have a few martini bars in the area but not champagne.  I believe there is one in Milwaukee (30 min. from our home), but DH hates driving in there to party.  And Swanky Bubbles, sounds like a hooker's name.


----------



## ChisJo

maddhatir said:


> Sounds fun! So when is the trip?



We leave April 1 and are coming back April 6. We are also going to Puerto Rico for a "conference" in May for 5 days, but we extended our stay to 7 days. The conference for BF is really just a bunch of working guys getting together to declare they are the kings of the world and then challenging each other to see how much scotch they can drink before they pass out. I truly don't like the conferences, but I already told him I'm not sticking around to watch them drink....I have plans to do some tours around the island with some of the other wives. If anyone has been here, any advice on what to see?


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> Tammy- I saw a few of the boutique hotels when I was searching for a place to stay- some of them are ADORABLE! They remind me of B&Bs- DH and I like B&Bs when traveling to places like, Rhode Island, Cape Cod, Savannah, Charleston-



Hey Madd!

Yay for you!!!  But I do know how you feel.  We are booked at the Iberostaro Grand Hotel Paraiso in May and I'm a bit disappointed that it isn't a quaint tropical type of place.  I preferred the look of the El Dorado Royale, but the Grand got such good reviews, I got overruled.  I'm sure we'll have a fabulous time, but it's so big and "Roman"!!!

On a side note, we just got back from WDW and there were tons of foreigners there.  We were surprised to note that there is a huge difference in the discipline by non-Americans vs. Americans.  The foreigners were much stricter and held their kids to higher standards than we have noticed with American families.  Those kids definitely had more respect for adults.  It was the whole - I'm only telling you once and then there are consequences method to child raising.  As opposed to the family we sat behind on the tram to the Studios one afternoon.... mom to a little girl sprawled out on the tram seat "sit up.  I said sit up.  Betsy, I want you to sit up."  After 4 or 5 tries, the mom gave up and the kid stayed lying down.  It really was hard not to notice the difference, at least that was our observation.

Liisa


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> We leave April 1 and are coming back April 6. We are also going to Puerto Rico for a "conference" in May for 5 days, but we extended our stay to 7 days. The conference for BF is really just a bunch of working guys getting together to declare they are the kings of the world and then challenging each other to see how much scotch they can drink before they pass out. I truly don't like the conferences, but I already told him I'm not sticking around to watch them drink....I have plans to do some tours around the island with some of the other wives. If anyone has been here, any advice on what to see?



hey! At least he does not mind you going along- and you get a vacation out of it. 

The only experience I have had with PR- is flying into their airport before I got on a little plane over to St. Thomas- sorry!

ugh- a scotch filled convention! DH likes to drink, but it is weird- we have been to several all inclusives, and he never gets drunk- I guess he "paces" himself

I am one to just catch and keep a buzz and ride it all night long- I got drunk, believe it or not, ONCE in my life!

I was 16- my parents went out for the night. I called a friend over and we raided the liquor cabinet! I am talking- a large cup filled with a sample of every liquor in the cabinet! All I can remember is the taste of Crown Royal! I do not even remember how many times we filledup the cup- it got to be a blur!

I puked before they got home and my friend helped me clean it up the best we could. Being trashed I am sure it did not look (or smell- ewww) as good as we THOUGHT it did!   She told my mom that I ate a bad cheese steak and it made me sick! 

And yes- I am still great friends with the girl who cleaned up my puke and lied to my parents for me- we e-mail each other about 3-4 times a day


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Hey Madd!
> 
> Yay for you!!!  But I do know how you feel.  We are booked at the Iberostaro Grand Hotel Paraiso in May and I'm a bit disappointed that it isn't a quaint tropical type of place.  I preferred the look of the El Dorado Royale, but the Grand got such good reviews, I got overruled.  I'm sure we'll have a fabulous time, but it's so big and "Roman"!!!
> 
> On a side note, we just got back from WDW and there were tons of foreigners there.  We were surprised to note that there is a huge difference in the discipline by non-Americans vs. Americans.  The foreigners were much stricter and held their kids to higher standards than we have noticed with American families.  Those kids definitely had more respect for adults.  It was the whole - I'm only telling you once and then there are consequences method to child raising.  As opposed to the family we sat behind on the tram to the Studios one afternoon.... mom to a little girl sprawled out on the tram seat "sit up.  I said sit up.  Betsy, I want you to sit up."  After 4 or 5 tries, the mom gave up and the kid stayed lying down.  It really was hard not to notice the difference, at least that was our observation.
> 
> Liisa



Hey Lisa- I am sure you can't go wrong with any Iberostar resort! 

And yes, you have to listen to those reviews- some of the people you can tell are just nit-picky. Some things you read, you think, are they for real!? But if you read too much of the same negative comments about a place- you know to steer clear. 

I can't wait to show DH the boutique hotels- I have a feeling he will love them!

Speaking of high family standards, I was watching Wife Swap last night- This husband was calling the other "wife" some really nasty names- being very rude and childish! I said to DH THERE is an example of why children anymore are just so rude and have no respect for anyone-

Just look at this LOSER of a father-figure acting like a 5 year old- I am certain his kids will just pick up what he does and think it is OK to act like that! His family just let the kids do whatever it they wanted!

And I want to SMACK their wives for sitting their "giggling" about it! Idiots! 

I believe a bit of fear instilled (consequences) into a child is perfectly fine! And if anyone says it is not- look at the kids these days, that is all I have to say!


----------



## kmmccart75

Liisa said:


> On a side note, we just got back from WDW and there were tons of foreigners there.  We were surprised to note that there is a huge difference in the discipline by non-Americans vs. Americans.  The foreigners were much stricter and held their kids to higher standards than we have noticed with American families.  Those kids definitely had more respect for adults.  It was the whole - I'm only telling you once and then there are consequences method to child raising.  As opposed to the family we sat behind on the tram to the Studios one afternoon.... mom to a little girl sprawled out on the tram seat "sit up.  I said sit up.  Betsy, I want you to sit up."  After 4 or 5 tries, the mom gave up and the kid stayed lying down.  It really was hard not to notice the difference, at least that was our observation.
> 
> Liisa



DH and I noticed the same thing on a trip to Europe last Spring - it was almost as if there were no kids there.  I mean, you had to look around to see them because there were none wailing or running around.  Obviously, the parents not only had control, but had a clue about when it was appropriate to have young children around.  DH and I joked that if we lived in Europe, we might actually want kids.  

An example is when we had a layover at the Charles de Gaulle airport in Paris.  They still have a lot of construction from when the new wing collapsed several years ago, so they have to bus you to and from the gates and airplanes.  The buses are standing room only and the rides are looong - we were on one to get to our plane to London for about 45 minutes and it seemed like we were driving in circles.  There were these two little British boys, maybe 5 or 6 years old, and after about 30 minutes standing on this careening bus, one turns to the other and in the cutest little voice says matter-of-factly, "Well, that settles it.  We're lost."  I had to whisper to DH that back home we would have been plugging our ears for all the "WHERE ARE WE GOING? HOW MUCH LONGER?  MOMMY I'M HUNGRY!  I HAVE TO PEE!  YOU SAID WE WERE GETTING ON A PLANE!  I WANNA SIT DOWN!  WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"


----------



## jumoo044

"WHERE ARE WE GOING? HOW MUCH LONGER?  MOMMY I'M HUNGRY!  I HAVE TO PEE!  YOU SAID WE WERE GETTING ON A PLANE!  I WANNA SIT DOWN!  WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"[/QUOTE]


----------



## DevilDuckie

I'm a mom, but I resent questions about things that are Not Your Business, even from family. I suggest you say the same thing I do when people ask me nosy questions about MY uterus: "That's not any of your business." If you are less confrontational than I am, assume that your ears are deceiving you and they couldn't *possibly* have asked something so personal and save them from embarassment by simply "failing to hear" the question.

Friendly curiosity can be treated more gently, but anyone who presses beyond the first question is being nosy and deserves no slack. Your choice to not have kids is as valid as mine to have one (maybe two!) or my cousin's to have six. Valid and personal and deserving of however much privacy you want.


----------



## danv3

As of yesterday, DW and I have a niece.  We're going to visit DW's brother, sister in law and baby tomorrow.  

Keep your fingers crossed that seeing the new baby and all the attention being lavished on her (first grandchild on either side) doesn't give DW any crazy ideas!


----------



## ChisJo

danv3 said:


> As of yesterday, DW and I have a niece.  We're going to visit DW's brother, sister in law and baby tomorrow.
> 
> Keep your fingers crossed that seeing the new baby and all the attention being lavished on her (first grandchild on either side) doesn't give DW any crazy ideas!



I work in Pediatrics and I have 9 neices and nephews, and trust me, I never get that desire to have any! They are more deterrants than anything, and truly, the BEST form of birth control on the market!


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> I work in Pediatrics and I have 9 neices and nephews, and trust me, I never get that desire to have any! They are more deterrants than anything, and truly, the BEST form of birth control on the market!



 ITA!

I have 2 nephews and 2 nieces- NOT once have I had the "urge" when seeing them 

The only thing that runs throught my mind is, thank god! I do not have kids!


----------



## zima-cheryl

danv3 said:


> As of yesterday, DW and I have a niece.  We're going to visit DW's brother, sister in law and baby tomorrow.
> 
> Keep your fingers crossed that seeing the new baby and all the attention being lavished on her (first grandchild on either side) doesn't give DW any crazy ideas!



I've got 5 nieces & nephews and not one of them has triggered any urges.  

Keep in mind along w/seeing all the attention happening for your SIL & new baby you also get to see the dirty diapers, nursing, exhastion from minimal sleep & other things that happen w/a new baby too.  

I find watching my SIL for about 2 seconds convinces me I could never do that.  

That said go enjoy that new niece.  When she gets older you can spoil her rotten, hype her up on sugar & send her home!


----------



## Hixski

We have very dear friends that now live in California. They came to see us last year so we will go this spring to see them. They have 2 girls that are now 8 and 10. We adore them and they adore us. They will stick to us like velcro the minute we get there.  We will have a great time but by the time we get on the plane 3 days later we will be glad to go. They are really great kids but 3 days of nonstop kids is exausting.


----------



## freemore

DH and I have 3 married adult children and 4 grandchildren who we have had to our house for Sunday dinner almost every sunday for many many years, for the last several years we have taken them out to eat for Sunday dinner because it was getting crowded and noisy at our houise.  But now DH is retiring in a few months  and we feel we can no longer afford to take them them out to eat the way we have been.  My husband told them we woulding be able to afford taking them out to eat on Sundays when he retires in a few months and wondered would they like to take turns having dinner at each other's houses.  Only one child responded positively and the subject hasn't come up since.  Any ideas?


----------



## maddhatir

freemore said:


> DH and I have 3 married adult children and 4 grandchildren who we have had to our house for Sunday dinner almost every sunday for many many years, for the last several years we have taken them out to eat for Sunday dinner because it was getting crowded and noisy at our houise.  But now DH is retiring in a few months  and we feel we can no longer afford to take them them out to eat the way we have been.  My husband told them we woulding be able to afford taking them out to eat on Sundays when he retires in a few months and wondered would they like to take turns having dinner at each other's houses.  Only one child responded positively and the subject hasn't come up since.  Any ideas?



 Only one! Wow- sounds a bit selfish of the other 2! I would make arrangements for the one family to have dinner at their home and see if the rest follow along- however, suggest each family brings something to dinner- like a pot luck


----------



## freemore

Thanks, that sounds like a great idea!


----------



## danv3

For the record, it doesn't seem like DW got any crazy ideas from seeing our new niece!  She liked holding her, but she also liked passing her back to new mom and dad after a while.


----------



## TXTurtles

danv3 said:


> For the record, it doesn't seem like DW got any crazy ideas from seeing our new niece!  She liked holding her, but she also liked passing her back to new mom and dad after a while.



 Good.  FWIW, I've found that working with kids is the best child-deterrent I could have.    Nothing like seeing what it's really like (crying, diapers, and all) to get you to re-evaluate just how much you want those nursing home visitors.


----------



## maddhatir

danv3 said:


> For the record, it doesn't seem like DW got any crazy ideas from seeing our new niece!  She liked holding her, but she also liked passing her back to new mom and dad after a while.



Well THANK GOODNESS she passed the test! One less thing to worry about! 

I found this little guy to explain the feelings (I) get around kids........................

eeeeek!


----------



## Chellymouse

DH and I have been married for 7 1/2 years, celebrated our honeymoon and 2 anniversaries at WDW and are plenty happy about. People have finally stopped asking us why we have chosen not to have children, however, we had to get to the point of near rudeness to make people understand that while it is their privilege to have children, it is our privilege not to have children. Another couple (good friends of ours) also do not have children and the 4 of us spent a week at WDW together this past August. We had a wonderful time, especially at PI. No need to worry about paying for babysitting service or having kids "ready to go" long before we are. Also a great way to take advantage of those "late night" extra hours! Congratulations to you for sticking to your guns and doing what's right for you!


----------



## danv3

Not to get all political, but what's up with extra tax rebates to people who have kids?  They already get several significant tax advantages.  Now we're going to reward them even more?  

DINKs spend money too!

http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/01/24/economic.stimulus/index.html


----------



## Hixski

danv3 said:


> Not to get all political, but what's up with extra tax rebates to people who have kids?  They already get several significant tax advantages.  Now we're going to reward them even more?
> 
> DINKs spend money too!
> 
> http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/01/24/economic.stimulus/index.html



At least we get in on this one too. The last rebate they had was JUST for people with children. Of course with this one they will get the one we get and then get an extra $300 a child on top of it. So what else is new?


----------



## myladyisatramp

You have no idea how much it cost to raise a child???? So the government giving us 300.00 per child (of course mine are grown so I won't get it)
Thats just a drop in the bucket, it may buy someone some diapers, formula or hockey equipment, or better yet pay tuition to school somewhere. My husband and I would probably have a nice nest egg right now, if we never had our 3 children between schools and activities college's not to mention weddings in a few years, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. To each is own, I say.


----------



## WDWguru

myladyisatramp said:


> You have no idea how much it cost to raise a child????



Certainly it's expensive, but it was YOUR CHOICE to have them. If someone can't afford them perhaps it would be best to wait until they are a little more financially stable. God forbid someone put a little forethought and planning into their DECISION to have children. It shouldn't be up to the rest of us to subsidize YOUR choice. Nobody subsidizes mine.


----------



## Hixski

WDWguru said:


> Certainly it's expensive, but it was YOUR CHOICE to have them. If someone can't afford them perhaps it would be best to wait until they are a little more financially stable. God forbid someone put a little forethought and planning into their DECISION to have children. It shouldn't be up to the rest of us to subsidize YOUR choice. Nobody subsidizes mine.



We live in a nice area with good school districts. We pay extra on our real estate taxes because of those nice school districts. We have something in Missouri called personal property tax that you pay at the end of the year every year. Most of the money goes to those nice school districts. We pay extra taxes every year so other people's children can go to those nice school districts. That has always been a pet peeve of mine.

I think they should prorate those kinds of taxes on if and how many children you have. We as CF would still pay our real estate taxes but we should not have to pay as much as someone who has say 3 children in those schools that we also pay for. We have people a few doors down with 6 children. They live in the same exact style house we do. So their taxes are the same as ours. They have 6 children attending those schools. We have none. That is what I don't think is right. 

I know someone will come and flame me but I get tired of getting nickeled and dimed to death for other peoples children. Even my mother who never complains was complaining this year about how high their real estate and personal property taxes were. She said it seemed to be going mostly to the schools and why do they still have to pay for others children. By the way my parents are 75 and 76.


----------



## myladyisatramp

I certainly can afford my kids, it just will be nice to get a little bonus, from the government instead of always putting out.


----------



## PhotobearSam

myladyisatramp said:


> I certainly can afford my kids, it just will be nice to get a little bonus, from the government instead of always putting out.



Just wondering and this is not a jab, but why would someone who has kids frequent this thread? 

I just don't get it.


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Just wondering and this is not a jab, but why would someone who has kids frequent this thread?
> 
> I just don't get it.



We usually have to question that about every 6 months!- THEY seem to slip in and add their 2 cents.  



myladyisatramp said:


> You have no idea how much it cost to raise a child???? So the government giving us 300.00 per child (of course mine are grown so I won't get it)
> Thats just a drop in the bucket, it may buy someone some diapers, formula or hockey equipment, or better yet pay tuition to school somewhere. My husband and I would probably have a nice nest egg right now, if we never had our 3 children between schools and activities college's not to mention weddings in a few years, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. To each is own, I say.



I say I don't give a rat's patootie how much it costs people to raise their kids- that is THEIR choice!

I chose to KEEP my money for myself- what does that mean, I have to be penalized?


----------



## KirklandTutu

maddhatir said:


> I say I don't give a rat's patootie how much it costs people to raise their kids- that is THEIR choice!
> 
> I chose to KEEP my money for myself- what does that mean, I have to be penalized?




Word.


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:


> Certainly it's expensive, but it was YOUR CHOICE to have them. If someone can't afford them perhaps it would be best to wait until they are a little more financially stable. God forbid someone put a little forethought and planning into their DECISION to have children. It shouldn't be up to the rest of us to subsidize YOUR choice. Nobody subsidizes mine.



I would like someone to subsidize my upcoming Mexico trip- oh, nevermind, I guess the Government has no sympathy for CF me and DH.


----------



## LindsayDunn228

WDWguru said:


> Certainly it's expensive, but it was YOUR CHOICE to have them. If someone can't afford them perhaps it would be best to wait until they are a little more financially stable. God forbid someone put a little forethought and planning into their DECISION to have children. It shouldn't be up to the rest of us to subsidize YOUR choice. Nobody subsidizes mine.



Oh my word. Best post on the DIS. Ever!!!!!


----------



## maddhatir

myladyisatramp said:


> I certainly can afford my kids, it just will be nice to get a little bonus, from the government instead of always putting out.



Reading this to DH-- his comment- "yeah- we ALL feel the same way, kids or NOT!, what's your point?"


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> I know someone will come and flame me but I get tired of getting nickeled and dimed to death for other peoples children. Even my mother who never complains was complaining this year about how high their real estate and personal property taxes were. She said it seemed to be going mostly to the schools and why do they still have to pay for others children. By the way my parents are 75 and 76.



I doubt you will be flamed by us CF people- you may though, by people who invade our thread!


----------



## 3DisneyKids

PhotobearSam said:


> Just wondering and this is not a jab, but why would someone who has kids frequent this thread?
> 
> I just don't get it.



I have answered this question on this thread before.  First, I totally admire and respect anyone who chooses to remain CF.  My BIL and SIL are one of those couples that had kids "just cause that is what you are supposed to do once you get married..."  

Obviously, based on my screen name, I have 3 kids.  Wouldn't change that.  But the reason I read here (almost completely a lurker but have posted maybe 2 or 3 times) is because I think it is so important to always have that other perspective.  My life revolves around my young children, all of my friends have young children, etc.  So it is really easy to get tunnel vision and think that everyone has kids or understands what it is like to go out to a restaurant with kids (for example), or doesn't mind having kids around, etc.

So, reading a thread like this helps eliminate that tunnel vision and remind me to keep my kids in check and well behaved when in public (becuase NO, not everyone will think it is adorable!) and/or remind me when it is best to leave them at home.  Not every experience should include the kids.

So, that is why I am here.

P.S.  I totally agree about the tax issue.  It is OUR choice to have children and that means assuming the costs that go along with that.  And there is no reason for those with children to get a bigger break.  It is a choice...and like any choices, there are rewards and consequences that go along with it.


----------



## maddhatir

3DisneyKids said:


> I have answered this question on this thread before.  First, I totally admire and respect anyone who chooses to remain CF.  My BIL and SIL are one of those couples that had kids "just cause that is what you are supposed to do once you get married..."
> 
> Obviously, based on my screen name, I have 3 kids.  Wouldn't change that.  But the reason I read here (almost completely a lurker but have posted maybe 2 or 3 times) is because I think it is so important to always have that other perspective.  My life revolves around my young children, all of my friends have young children, etc.  So it is really easy to get tunnel vision and think that everyone has kids or understands what it is like to go out to a restaurant with kids (for example), or doesn't mind having kids around, etc.
> 
> So, reading a thread like this helps eliminate that tunnel vision and remind me to keep my kids in check and well behaved when in public (becuase NO, not everyone will think it is adorable!) and/or remind me when it is best to leave them at home.  Not every experience should include the kids.
> 
> So, that is why I am here.
> 
> P.S.  I totally agree about the tax issue.  It is OUR choice to have children and that means assuming the costs that go along with that.  And there is no reason for those with children to get a bigger break.  It is a choice...and like any choices, there are rewards and consequences that go along with it.




But YOU are a big exception to the rule! Not everyone is as understanding as you. Sometimes we have people come here just to harass us and comment on how wonderful it is to have kids and WE are the ones that are making a big mistake! We will regret not having kids in the future.....

Because....................

How about  this one- who is going to take care of you when you get older?!


----------



## 3DisneyKids

maddhatir said:


> But YOU are a big exception to the rule! Not everyone is as understanding as you. Sometimes we have people come here just to harass us and comment on how wonderful it is to have kids and WE are the ones that are making a big mistake! We will regret not having kids in the future.....
> 
> Because....................
> 
> How about  this one- who is going to take care of you when you get older?!



Thanks.

Gee...now THERE'S a good reason to reproduce!     Heck, just take the money that you would have spent raising kids and sock it away...then you could have the BEST care available and live out your older years in true luxury!  

My BIL and SIL, sadly, think along those lines...they have to have a big family for when they are older.  Deep down, they are ones who really never wanted kids.  BUT, because everyone just "expected" them to have kids, they did.  And now they are resentful...which of course their kids pick up on...and are thus rotten kids...and so the cycle goes.


----------



## WDWguru

LindsayDunn228 said:


> Oh my word. Best post on the DIS. Ever!!!!!



Whoa, I think I'm blushing!


----------



## LindsayDunn228

WDWguru said:


> Whoa, I think I'm blushing!


As well you should! That response rocked!!!!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> I doubt you will be flamed by us CF people- you may though, by people who invade our thread!



Those were the ones I was talking about. The ones that have to tell us how wrong we are, that we SHOULD pay for their childrens education because they will be working in the nursing home we are in. The nursing home we are in because we didn't have kids to take care of us in our old age. 

Personally I plan on being in a luxury condo in south Florida in my old age.

A big "Thank You" to 3Disneykids too for understanding all of us on the "dark side". It means alot since their seem to be so many people that think their way is the only way. It gets tiresome to be labeled a child hater whenever we stand up for our rights as CF adults.


----------



## zippitydoo

Me and my boyfriend are in our 30's and we don't want children.  There are so many reasons why we don't want children.  We like being able to be spontaneous and not having to worry about a kid, We both don't have the patience, their expensive.  Having kids is not for everybody and for us it's not.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> A big "Thank You" to 3Disneykids too for understanding all of us on the "dark side". It means alot since their seem to be so many people that think their way is the only way. It gets tiresome to be labeled a child hater whenever we stand up for our rights as CF adults.



I think everyone should take what we say to heart and apply it to the raising of their children! 

I feel, in a way, we have touched so many people with our advice......and rantings


----------



## maddhatir

zippitydoo said:


> Me and my boyfriend are in our 30's and we don't want children.  There are so many reasons why we don't want children.  We like being able to be spontaneous and not having to worry about a kid, We both don't have the patience, their expensive.  Having kids is not for everybody and for us it's not.



You know- not only are they expensive, but I cannot be worrying myself about, are they safe, will they do the right thing when they leave the house, what shape will the world be in when they get older- WAY too much stress for my liking!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> will they do the right thing when they leave the house,



This for sure can be a major issue for some parents.  I work for the Dept. of Human Services-Juvenile Services Division.  I receive police reports on juveniles who break the law, process the paperwork and assign them to a social worker.  This week I received a police report on a kid who is 15, he had committed Criminal Damage to Property, Theft & Burglary(many counts of each).  He had 53 victims in all who had their cars keyed, lawn ornaments broken (including a large concrete water fountain that was broken apart & smashed), and homes & vehicles broken into.  This was a 3 month "high" for him during the months of July, August & Sept. '07.  The manpower and money that has gone into the processing, not to mention the victims loss is extreme.  I went through 4 reems of paper (500 sheets in each reem) just to copy all of the information that goes to the District Attorney's office.  Now because this kid is only 15 his share of restitution is only $600.00.  With all of the damage he did the actual damage totals goes into thousands of dollars.  The 10 cars he keyed cost approximately $2,500 each to be repaired alone.  So it will be up to the victims to hopefully have their insurance cover most of the damage costs and then take the kids parents to small claims court to recover their deductible.  It's the trickle down effect that causes insurance rates to go up, hours paid to police and County employees to process all of this information and counsel the kid.  And as usual as CF taxpayers we are paying for this kid too.  Okay, rant over.


----------



## zima-cheryl

zippitydoo said:


> Me and my boyfriend are in our 30's and we don't want children.  There are so many reasons why we don't want children.  We like being able to be spontaneous and not having to worry about a kid, We both don't have the patience, their expensive.  Having kids is not for everybody and for us it's not.




And it is not just all that - most days it takes all my energy & time to keep myself organized, happy & well-balanced.  

If I had to be responsible for anything more emotionally complex than my dog or cats I couldn't do it. 

I'd rather know that about myself & choose not have kids, than go ahead and have kids because then it would be a big ole' mess!


----------



## Conway733

My husband and I have been married for five years.  We have no children and choose not to have children.  One of the main reasons for this decision is because we can't afford children.  This is also why we bought a house we can afford, instead of choosing to buy something we know we can't afford, even though the mortgage loan companies say we can.  So, we don't have kids, we don't have the biggest, newest house on the block, we drive used cars.  We are tired of being asked about having children.  I didn't know as an American citizen I am required to have children.  Sorry for the vent.  I am just reading through these posts and am glad there are others like us.  

Property taxes and school taxes are a huge pet peeve of mine here in PA.  Our tax bills for the year are over $2500.  What do we get for that?  Not much.  PA really needs to rehaul their outdated property/school tax practices.


----------



## maddhatir

Conway733 said:


> Property taxes and school taxes are a huge pet peeve of mine here in PA.  Our tax bills for the year are over $2500.  What do we get for that?  Not much.  PA really needs to rehaul their outdated property/school tax practices.




We have discussed property taxes here before- I am right across the river in NJ and we have LESS than an acre and our taxes are now a little over 5000.00! And we just put on an addition- the taxes for that have not been tacked on yet!

Guess what- next year our county is being reassessed- I am scared to DEATH to even think about what our taxes will be after the reassessment!


And about not living beyond your means- I always find it hilarious when I see these ding dongs with 2+ kids in these huge houses driving the kids to soccer practice in the huge SUV thinking they are ALL that- give me a break people, I can care less about your status in the community- they are probably up to their neck in debt to look good! I look at them and laugh inside! 

I think it might be, we CF people just have more common sense It must be some sort of "breeder gene" that makes those people want to "keep up with the Jones" 

You know the poor husband/father is working is BUTT off to keep the wife and kids accustomed to that nauseating lifestyle! He probably does not even have time to breath- let alone spend time with his family- and a lot of those guys look like they can really care less to BE with their families!

OK- another rant over!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> And about not living beyond your means- I always find it hilarious when I see these ding dongs with 2+ kids in these huge houses driving the kids to soccer practice in the huge SUV thinking they are ALL that- give me a break people, I can care less about your status in the community- they are probably up to their neck in debt to look good! I look at them and laugh inside!



My hair dresser was telling me about one lady she has come in - big SUV, new McMansion, etc.  They are so in debt they can't afford curtains for the McMansion & only a few of the rooms are funished...with the leftover furniture from their last place.  
Of course I'm sure as soon as some dumb bank offers them another credit card they'll take care of that stuff too!

I agree - if you can't afford it, don't do it!  
We may have a tiny ranch, but we can afford it and afford to fix it up the way we want.  Right now we are re-doing the entire master bedroom (paint, carpet, new bed & furniture, adding a ceiling fan) and when all is said & done all we will have is a balance on our Home Depot card for the carpet (discounted installation + 6 mos. interest free!   )


----------



## Hixski

We have a 1400 sq ft ranch. It will be paid off in about 5 years.  Everyone asks us why we never upgraded to a bigger house. Hello......the dog has his own bedroom. (Ok, he shares it with our office) We don't need a bigger house. We have 3 bedrooms, 2 baths and a full basement with 2-car garage. We built it new in 1987 and have just upgraded things to bring it into the new millemium. In 5 years we will be mortgage free (5 years early). 


Madd: I feel for you when they reasses your county. Especially once they tack on your addition. Good luck, you will need it on that one.


----------



## ChisJo

Hixski said:


> We have a 1400 sq ft ranch. It will be paid off in about 5 years.  Everyone asks us why we never upgraded to a bigger house. Hello......the dog has his own bedroom. (Ok, he shares it with our office) We don't need a bigger house. We have 3 bedrooms, 2 baths and a full basement with 2-car garage. We built it new in 1987 and have just upgraded things to bring it into the new millemium. In 5 years we will be mortgage free (5 years early).



We live in a 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom adults only condo, 1030 sq ft and I love it....no worries about snow removal, lawn maintenance, we have underground heated parking....it's great! Plus, there is no playground near by to hear kids screaming at 8am! Love it!

In addition, our taxes are peanuts compared to others, and our mortgage is completely affordable. We took posession in Dec 2006 and are hoping to have everything paid off by the end of next year....then we have more time (and money) for vacations!

Anyways, sitting here in Orlando and enjoying my vacation - I should get back! We are off to Sleuths tonight!


----------



## LindsayDunn228

ChisJo said:


> We live in a 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom adults only condo, 1030 sq ft and I love it....no worries about snow removal, lawn maintenance, we have underground heated parking....it's great! Plus, there is no playground near by to hear kids screaming at 8am! Love it!



Sweeeeeeeeeeeet!


----------



## PhotobearSam

DH and I have a ranch that also has a 1 bedroom apt in the basement that we rent out. Our upstairs has 3 bedrooms (one master, one computer room and one small guest room and a kitchen and separate living room . In the basement, I also have a craft room and a large storage/furnace room. We have about 1500 for ourselves and when I get tired of having a tenant, we will make his kitchen/living room into a media room with PINBALL MACHINE...(we are saving right now).

Our mortgage is only $600 per month and we plan on having this baby paid off a lot sooner than later. We drive my Dad's older Cadillac that he gave me (it's in nice condition and I am so spoiled) and a 2004 Impala. What do we spend our money on? Our house, vacations, clothes and savings. I would change any of this unless I won over 10 million. 


We are just DH, myself and 3 cats...WHY would we need more room? So we can spend more time cleaning?

I have some friends who moved here and built a huge house (3000 plus the basement) and now they are trying to adopt even though she admits to not being maternal but is convinced that will change once they get a baby!?!?!??

They work like dogs and drive cars from the early 90's and can't afford to furnish their house...now they want a baby they think they would love... 

One of our other friends took me aside one night and told me I am the smartest person she knows for not getting into the "Big House/Expensive" lifestyle a lot of our friends have done. She said, "If we did not have kids, I would live just like you do...Smartly. You get to travel." 

Everyone thought I would get sucked into the BIG house game as I grew up very privileged and grew up in a huge house and my parents had a lot of money. When I answer this question I always say, My parents got to where they are because they were smart...and I am their daughter so I am smart about it too.


----------



## Liisa

Madd, I feel for you about the property taxes.  Mine are outrageous (Connecticut is expensive!)  

I just wanted to jump in and announce our (soon-to-be) new arrival.  We agreed this weekend to adopt a 6 year old rescue Tibetan Mastiff.  That will make our third (and final) Tibetan and our second rescue.  We are excited.  She's gorgeous.  If you want to see her, she is posted on the rescue website... go to tibetanmastiff.org, follow through to rescues and she is "Kayla".  We do have a big house (just over 3,000 sq ft on 5 acres)... but we need it with these dogs!!!!  I can't wait until she comes home!   

We also happen to drive a big SUV... for the dogs.  We laugh at ourselves when we go SUV shopping, we always climb in the back to see if the dogs will have enough room.  My parents think we are crazy, but we just love them!

Liisa


----------



## aclov

Liisa said:


> Madd, I feel for you about the property taxes.  Mine are outrageous (Connecticut is expensive!)
> 
> I just wanted to jump in and announce our (soon-to-be) new arrival.  We agreed this weekend to adopt a 6 year old rescue Tibetan Mastiff.  That will make our third (and final) Tibetan and our second rescue.  We are excited.  She's gorgeous.  If you want to see her, she is posted on the rescue website... go to tibetanmastiff.org, follow through to rescues and she is "Kayla".  We do have a big house (just over 3,000 sq ft on 5 acres)... but we need it with these dogs!!!!  I can't wait until she comes home!
> 
> We also happen to drive a big SUV... for the dogs.  We laugh at ourselves when we go SUV shopping, we always climb in the back to see if the dogs will have enough room.  My parents think we are crazy, but we just love them!
> 
> Liisa




What a beautiful dog!     Good for you for rescuing and congrats!  It sounds like she ended up at the right place with lots of love.


----------



## Liisa

Thank you!  I feel like such a proud "mom".  I figure it is only a matter of time before I get really crazy and start carrying around pictures of the three of them (heck, I'd even include pictures of my Yeti who passed on).  Can you see it... Hi, I'm Liisa, want to see my dogs?!!


----------



## aclov

Liisa said:


> Thank you!  I feel like such a proud "mom".  I figure it is only a matter of time before I get really crazy and start carrying around pictures of the three of them (heck, I'd even include pictures of my Yeti who passed on).  Can you see it... Hi, I'm Liisa, want to see my dogs?!!



Actually it's not crazy at all and I am sooo HAPPY to find that more people are carrying their pets pictures with them or on their camera phone.   I was at a company dinner and we started talking about dogs and before you knew it people started passing around pictures and their phones of their pets!   I felt like such a bad mom because I didn't have any   And than all the stories started -  it was nice to hear.


----------



## JCandKT

Hey all!  I've been kind of scarce around the boards as of late...but here I am!
DH and I have become "parents" to an adorable miniature schnauzer named Dexter - he's about 8 months old and brings a lot of joy to our lives.

Wanted to get in on this discussion about living beyond means...

For so long, I've thought that to truly have "made it" I had to live in a huge house, drive a new car, have 2.2 kids, wear the lastest fashions... but man, I realize that happiness is not defined by that stuff (as my sister has found out...she lives in a huge house, 3 boys, nice cars, and she's miserable).  She's up to her ears in debt.  We can honestly say that the only thing we owe is our mortgage as far as debt goes...and that's a great feeling!

What JC and I have is modest but it's us.  And we get to go on vacation to DW whenever we can!

We're looking at going in September... maybe splitting between PO/Riverside and Beach Club.  As much as I'd love to do BC the whole time, it's a chuck o' change.  

But I want to hit that Jellyrolls!

See ya!


----------



## maddhatir

JCandKT said:


> For so long, I've thought that to truly have "made it" I had to live in a huge house, drive a new car, have 2.2 kids, wear the *lastest fashions*...



 I am looking forward to checking out our local Goodwill store soon for some clothes- I LOVE the look- I call myself- Hobo-chic- SO LOOK OUT! 

I bought this awesome blue fuzzy coat at a second-hand shop in New Hope PA and can I TELL you how many compliments I get on it!?- I have to brag to everyone that comments- "yeah- 2nd hand store- 30 bucks!- I know you are jealous cuz you will never find another like it!"


----------



## ChisJo

So, I had the priveledge of seeing a mystery dinner show at Sleuths and it was FANTASTIC! If you've never been, I highly recommend it for you next trip out. THe service was great and the show was absolutely HILARIOUS. So much interaction between the audience and the actors. You get to know the people at your table (we had a GREAT bunch of people at ours). Food was average, nothing to brag home about, but overall, SO happy we went and we would go again in a heartbeat!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> I just wanted to jump in and announce our (soon-to-be) new arrival.  We agreed this weekend to adopt a 6 year old rescue Tibetan Mastiff.  That will make our third (and final) Tibetan and our second rescue.  We are excited.  She's gorgeous.  If you want to see her, she is posted on the rescue website... go to tibetanmastiff.org, follow through to rescues and she is "Kayla".  We do have a big house (just over 3,000 sq ft on 5 acres)... but we need it with these dogs!!!!  I can't wait until she comes home!
> 
> We also happen to drive a big SUV... for the dogs.  We laugh at ourselves when we go SUV shopping, we always climb in the back to see if the dogs will have enough room.  My parents think we are crazy, but we just love them!
> 
> Liisa



So when is the big day!!!???- 

I want to see pics!!!!

ETA- I love how they describe her....."not for the faint of heart" Do they let you know her past?? I am curious to know what her story is!

She is beautiful!


----------



## Liisa

Hi Madd,

Looks like the big day is Feb 15th.  She's flying from LA to New York on the 14th, spending and overnight in New York and then they'll drive her out to me on the 15th.  Poor thing on a plane....  But it will be worth it to get her to a permanent home.

My Yeti (my avatar) was also "not for the faint of heart"... so that didn't scare us away at all!  Heck, we figured Yeti was good training for this.  According to my conversations about her, she is stubborn and will growl if you force her to do something she doesn't want to do.  You've got to coax her into things.  Convince her it's her idea.  

Apparently, Miss Kayla has been in rescue 3 times in her 6 short years of life.  The first time was when she was 2 (my guess is that people didn't realize who BIG she was going to get).  Then she got rehomed up to Canada to live with a merchant marine and his wife.  The merchant marine came home one day and found wifey in bed with someone else.  The got a divorce and Kayla was the casualty.  Then she got rehomed with another couple and she growled at them.  They freaked out and gave her up.  Not for nothing, my parents have a lab who has growled.  It really isn't that big a deal as long as you know why they are growling and how to manage it - and the dog isn't progressing to the next step.  She's been in rescue for several months now, splitting her time between doggie daycare and a vet's office.  It will take us some time to win her over, but we are ready for it.  I can't wait to meet her.     And of course I'll post pictures!!!


----------



## Liisa

ChisJo,

Did you finally get that sword you keep eyeing?  

Liisa


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Hi Madd,
> 
> Looks like the big day is Feb 15th.  She's flying from LA to New York on the 14th, spending and overnight in New York and then they'll drive her out to me on the 15th.  Poor thing on a plane....  But it will be worth it to get her to a permanent home.
> 
> My Yeti (my avatar) was also "not for the faint of heart"... so that didn't scare us away at all!  Heck, we figured Yeti was good training for this.  According to my conversations about her, she is stubborn and will growl if you force her to do something she doesn't want to do.  You've got to coax her into things.  Convince her it's her idea.
> 
> Apparently, Miss Kayla has been in rescue 3 times in her 6 short years of life.  The first time was when she was 2 (my guess is that people didn't realize who BIG she was going to get).  Then she got rehomed up to Canada to live with a merchant marine and his wife.  The merchant marine came home one day and found wifey in bed with someone else.  The got a divorce and Kayla was the casualty.  Then she got rehomed with another couple and she growled at them.  They freaked out and gave her up.  Not for nothing, my parents have a lab who has growled.  It really isn't that big a deal as long as you know why they are growling and how to manage it - and the dog isn't progressing to the next step.  She's been in rescue for several months now, splitting her time between doggie daycare and a vet's office.  It will take us some time to win her over, but we are ready for it.  I can't wait to meet her.     And of course I'll post pictures!!!



OMG Lis- she is SO lucky she will be living with you all! She might scare the bejeezus out of Yeti at first! Yeti will be looking at you like, what are you doing to me mom?!

Heck- Kayla sounds like she has MY personality! WE DON'T BITE! Just give us our way and everything will be COOL! 

People make me so mad when they get a pet and do not think it all the way through! Yes- you need to take into consideration- your pet MAY get large- that is why you RESEARCH! I think in situations like that- they should leave the pet in the nice, cozy, warm house and -rehome- the dopes who got the pet- rehome them to a cold shelter to see what it is like!

Oh no- she has to fly?- are they going to put her in cargo!? I would buy her a seat and make her wear a seatbelt, give her a nice pillow to rest her head on! How cool would that be, walking up to your seat and there is this massive pup in the seat next to you. if she does not like the person who is sitting next to her, she can just growl! 

Let me ask everyone- I know Hixski probably saw it b/c I posted it elsewhere- but has anyone here seen that commercial for the ASPCA with Sarah McLachlan?

Warning- it WILL make you cry! I was bawling like a baby when I saw it! I had to turn the volume down on the TV- if I ever hear this song anywhere else- I will loose it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EYocy_DN60


----------



## Liisa

Such a sad, sad video.  I hope it helps to get support for these poor animals.  

Yes, Kayla has to go in cargo.  Can you imagine walking onto a plane and seeing a huge 100 pound furry black dog sitting in a seat?  Eek!  Of course, if there is a screaming child kicking the seat behind you, a growling dog may be useful (just kidding - I am not condoning dogs to bite children - just in case someone takes me seriously and I start getting flamed.  We should do little legal disclaimers at the bottom of our posts!  )   I do like the fact that these guys look big and intimidating.  That way when DH is working late, I feel safe at home.  Of course, my 1 and a half year old male rescue - Khabo - would probably run and hide behind me.  But Pari (my 5 yr old girl) and Kayla would be tough.  Leave it to the girls to be the dependable ones.  

Yeti would have taken someone's head off, but he is the one I lost last January to aspirated pneumonia.  Turns out, it is taking two rescue dogs to take his place.  He was quite a presence!


----------



## Hixski

I can't watch any of those ASPCA commercials. I watch those Animal Precinct shows on Animal Planet and feel so bad for all those abused and neglected pets. They ALWAYS show one of those commercials and it just makes me sad and angry at the same time. There has to be a special place in HE double hockey sticks for people that abuse a defenseless animal.

Liisa: Can't wait to see pictures of Kayla when you get her.


----------



## PoohNTuck

I just wanted to update everyone.  We went to one doctor this month about getting a VAS.  He's been doing them 30 years and has a clinic in our hometown.  We expected to be grilled about our choices.  We expected to defend our position.   We expected to show off our knowledge on the topic.  He approved us that day with very little interrogation.  We have the appt set 3 weeks later in the a.m. on a day that worked for us.  I am 28, DH is 21 and we have no children.

The doctor said that in this day and age, if youre confident in your decision to make an appt and come in to find out about it, it's our decision to make.  We live in the Northeast.  I don't know if Geography has anything to do with it.

Now I just hope insurance covers it... I'll let everyone know how the recovery goes!

PoohnTuck


----------



## Shyvioletisme

that's wonderful. I'm glad you were able to find a doctor who was secure in ya'lls decision. Because it really is your decision...not a doctor's!!! Good luck to your DH on the surgery...and good luck with insurance covering it!!




PoohNTuck said:


> I just wanted to update everyone.  We went to one doctor this month about getting a VAS.  He's been doing them 30 years and has a clinic in our hometown.  We expected to be grilled about our choices.  We expected to defend our position.   We expected to show off our knowledge on the topic.  He approved us that day with very little interrogation.  We have the appt set 3 weeks later in the a.m. on a day that worked for us.  I am 28, DH is 21 and we have no children.
> 
> The doctor said that in this day and age, if youre confident in your decision to make an appt and come in to find out about it, it's our decision to make.  We live in the Northeast.  I don't know if Geography has anything to do with it.
> 
> Now I just hope insurance covers it... I'll let everyone know how the recovery goes!
> 
> PoohnTuck


----------



## TKDisneylover

Liisa said:


> Hi Madd,
> 
> Looks like the big day is Feb 15th.  She's flying from LA to New York on the 14th, spending and overnight in New York and then they'll drive her out to me on the 15th.  Poor thing on a plane....  But it will be worth it to get her to a permanent home.



Congrats on the addition of your new family member!   I think it is so awesome that you are taking in a pet someone else did not want.  Our Veda was passed around to 2 different families before we got her.  We think that one of the families must have frightened her with fireworks because she is deathly afraid of them.  She shakes and tries to find the most center of the house when she hears them.  We live near a Golf Club House & a High School that occassionally set them off for different occasions.  Good luck with her transition into your home.



maddhatir said:


> Warning- it WILL make you cry! I was bawling like a baby when I saw it! I had to turn the volume down on the TV- if I ever hear this song anywhere else- I will loose it!
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EYocy_DN60



Okay, so you gave me warnings and I should have listened but I thought I could handle this.  Apparently I'm not recovered from puting down our cat Samantha (bone tumor) because I got very emotional and thought of her immediately when I saw all those kitties in that commercial!  Just smack me now!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Yeti would have taken someone's head off, but he is the one I lost last January to aspirated pneumonia.  Turns out, it is taking two rescue dogs to take his place.  He was quite a presence!



I am sorry- I said Yeti! My big mistake


----------



## maddhatir

Well CF peoples I am leaving 3:15am Sat morning for my vacation to Mexico!  Just in case I can't pop in tomorrow......adios amigos! 

I just checked the weather for Playa del Carmen and all week it syas it will be in the 80's and sunshine- however, they also give you the "reel-feel" temos and they go anywhere from 90 to 100!!! 

DH is sick as a dog right now with a 102 fever! He went to the docs yesterday and is on an antibiotic, decongestant and cough medicine. He is all bundled up in his fleece blankeys downstairs on the couch sleeping. I am crossing my fingers he feels at least 50% better by Sat morning just so he can at least get to the airport, get the luggage checked in and settled in on the plane etc- once we get there he can relax in the room or on the beach- and he should be all better by mid-week *hopefully*


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Well CF peoples I am leaving 3:15am Sat morning for my vacation to Mexico!  Just in case I can't pop in tomorrow......adios amigos!
> 
> I just checked the weather for Playa del Carmen and all week it syas it will be in the 80's and sunshine- however, they also give you the "reel-feel" temos and they go anywhere from 90 to 100!!!
> 
> DH is sick as a dog right now with a 102 fever! He went to the docs yesterday and is on an antibiotic, decongestant and cough medicine. He is all bundled up in his fleece blankeys downstairs on the couch sleeping. I am crossing my fingers he feels at least 50% better by Sat morning just so he can at least get to the airport, get the luggage checked in and settled in on the plane etc- once we get there he can relax in the room or on the beach- and he should be all better by mid-week *hopefully*




Have a great trip!!  I bet your DH will be feeling better after a couple days on anti-b's, and that warm Mexico sunshine will make him feel better too!  Enjoy!

PS:  Did you hear that Johnny's filming part of his new movie in WI?  They will be filming in a town about 45 minutes from our city.  It's a small hole in the wall tourist town that has maintained it's old town buildings, I guess that's why they are filming it there.  I heard on the news the other day that they are looking for people with old cars (30's/40's) that are in decent condition for filming.  Still debating whether to head up there in March when filming supposedly begins to get a glimpse of Mr. Depp.


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Well CF peoples I am leaving 3:15am Sat morning for my vacation to Mexico!  Just in case I can't pop in tomorrow......adios amigos!
> 
> I just checked the weather for Playa del Carmen and all week it syas it will be in the 80's and sunshine- however, they also give you the "reel-feel" temos and they go anywhere from 90 to 100!!!
> 
> DH is sick as a dog right now with a 102 fever! He went to the docs yesterday and is on an antibiotic, decongestant and cough medicine. He is all bundled up in his fleece blankeys downstairs on the couch sleeping. I am crossing my fingers he feels at least 50% better by Sat morning just so he can at least get to the airport, get the luggage checked in and settled in on the plane etc- once we get there he can relax in the room or on the beach- and he should be all better by mid-week *hopefully*



Have fun Madd!!!  Hope DH is better soon. He should be good enough in a couple days to at least get on the plane. Give him a couple margaritas when he gets there, he will feel better. Tequila will kill anything.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Still debating whether to head up there in March when filming supposedly begins to get a glimpse of Mr. Depp.



 Debating!? There is no debating when JD is only 45 minutes away!!! 

I think I would be able to SMELL him if he was 45 minutes away!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> Well CF peoples I am leaving 3:15am Sat morning for my vacation to Mexico!  Just in case I can't pop in tomorrow......adios amigos!
> 
> I just checked the weather for Playa del Carmen and all week it syas it will be in the 80's and sunshine- however, they also give you the "reel-feel" temos and they go anywhere from 90 to 100!!!
> 
> DH is sick as a dog right now with a 102 fever! He went to the docs yesterday and is on an antibiotic, decongestant and cough medicine. He is all bundled up in his fleece blankeys downstairs on the couch sleeping. I am crossing my fingers he feels at least 50% better by Sat morning just so he can at least get to the airport, get the luggage checked in and settled in on the plane etc- once we get there he can relax in the room or on the beach- and he should be all better by mid-week *hopefully*



I'm so envious... we have 29 more days until we leave for Cancun - I'm so ready for some sunshine & white sand...not white snow!


If he is on meds. by Sat. he should be okay, may not be feeling great, but should at least be able to travel.  Although you might want to think about doing curb-side bag check.  Save yourselves having to haul your bags any further than necessary.  If he is still run down the less extra effort the better.

Travel safe & have a great time!!!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> I'm so envious... we have 29 more days until we leave for Cancun - I'm so ready for some sunshine & white sand...not white snow!
> 
> 
> If he is on meds. by Sat. he should be okay, may not be feeling great, but should at least be able to travel.  Although you might want to think about doing curb-side bag check.  Save yourselves having to haul your bags any further than necessary.  If he is still run down the less extra effort the better.
> 
> Travel safe & have a great time!!!



But just think I will then be envious of you b/c I will be back already! Where are you staying in Cancun? (ETA- Hold on- I know- you are stayng at the Iberostar- I remember talking about it- I am sorry)

Can you do curbside with International flights?? Also we are doing a charter flight through USA3000- they may need to weigh our bags and all that happy horsecrap. 

We are doing the parking, where, you drive to the lot- they jump in YOUR car and drive you to the airport, help you to get your bags out and then bring your car back to their lot. 

When we come home- we just pick up the phone, call the lot and they come get us with our car. So hopefully the first part will be less stress on DH- I will probably drive us to the parking lot. He can chill in the passenger's side.


----------



## WDWguru

Typically you can NOT do curbside on international flights as they have to do a passport check. Some airports do have the new kiosks inside where you can swipe yours, though. Then you get your bag tags and drop your luggage - still quicker than waiting in line. 

Have fun!!


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:


> Typically you can NOT do curbside on international flights as they have to do a passport check. Some airports do have the new kiosks inside where you can swipe yours, though. Then you get your bag tags and drop your luggage - still quicker than waiting in line.
> 
> Have fun!!



I am one who needs to talk to a real person in case I have any questions- I am afraid I will mess something up. We will be arriving at the airport around 4am- I doubt we will encounter a huge line


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> I am sorry- I said Yeti! My big mistake





Oh, no worries at all.  It took a long time, but now I can talk about him without being too sad.  And actually I like talking about him.  He was a funny guy.... except for the day he tore my couch apart, but that's a whole other story.

HAVE FUN IN MEXICO!!!!  I've still got just over 3 months until DH and I head down there.  The time couldn't possibly be going by any slower!  Have a fruity drink for me!!!  And I want details when you get back, pretty please!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> But just think I will then be envious of you b/c I will be back already! Where are you staying in Cancun? (ETA- Hold on- I know- you are stayng at the Iberostar- I remember talking about it- I am sorry)



Actually we are at the Omni.  It is a bit further up from downtown, but still a short cab ride to the clubs and restaurants.  And being a bit further up means it is a bit quieter.  I can't wait to get back (we have a time share) becuase they added a quiet pool (ie: no kids!!!) since last time we were there.   



maddhatir said:


> Can you do curbside with International flights?? Also we are doing a charter flight through USA3000- they may need to weigh our bags and all that happy horsecrap.



I actually thought it depended on the airline and the airport.  So it probably depends on who you are flying & where you fly out of.  Even if you could get one of those guys to give you a cart or haul your bags in to the counter for you it might be worth asking (and of course tossing the guy a couple $$ for it).

Travel Safe


----------



## Wishes n Dreams

Hello everyone! Hope you all don't mind if I sneak onto this thread.  I am 25yo and my DH will be 27 tomorrow .  We have been married for almost 6 years and have also decided not to have children.  It is funny because when I was younger, like 14-15, I could not wait to get married and have kids but slowly as I have gotten older and discussed it more with my husband the less and less I want to have children, until now I am pretty much 100% on not having children.  
I think that it is funny that our families completely support us in this decision, even though my mother wants grandchildren so badly she once offered to raise them if I would just have them, I am pretty sure she was joking .  But it is my coworkers, patients (I am also an RN), and strangers that cannot seem to fathom it.  Most of our friends have realized we are serious about not wanting kids.  I love that their first response is "but you would be such a good mom/dad" Not to sound concieted but I know I would be a good mom, but there are times that I barely want to put the effort into training my dog, so I am pretty sure that I would not want to put the effort into raising children properly.
Wow I think this may be the longest post I have done, guess I needed to vent to those who understand. I will post later unless you kick me off for being long winded


----------



## PhotobearSam

Wishes n Dreams said:


> Hello everyone! Hope you all don't mind if I sneak onto this thread.  I am 25yo and my DH will be 27 tomorrow .  We have been married for almost 6 years and have also decided not to have children.  It is funny because when I was younger, like 14-15, I could not wait to get married and have kids but slowly as I have gotten older and discussed it more with my husband the less and less I want to have children, until now I am pretty much 100% on not having children.
> I think that it is funny that our families completely support us in this decision, even though my mother wants grandchildren so badly she once offered to raise them if I would just have them, I am pretty sure she was joking .  But it is my coworkers, patients (I am also an RN), and strangers that cannot seem to fathom it.  Most of our friends have realized we are serious about not wanting kids.  I love that their first response is "but you would be such a good mom/dad" Not to sound concieted but I know I would be a good mom, but there are times that I barely want to put the effort into training my dog, so I am pretty sure that I would not want to put the effort into raising children properly.
> Wow I think this may be the longest post I have done, guess I needed to vent to those who understand. I will post later unless you kick me off for being long winded




Nope, you can't leave us now...there is strength in numbers.LOL WELCOME. 

I know what you mean...I get the "But you would make god parents and don't you want a Little Richard or Samantha running around"...Ummmm NO.

I would only be a good parent if I had to and I don't want to HAVE TO do anything. I like my cats. I actually WANT them...Kids, not a chance.

Today we are going to see my youngest niece (7) play ringette (forthose who don't know what it is http://www.ringette.ca/Content/About/OurSport/AboutRingette.asp) and be the supportive aunt and uncle. That's just how I like it. I love my nieces and they love me. That's all I need.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Wishes n Dreams said:


> Hello everyone! Hope you all don't mind if I sneak onto this thread.  I am 25yo and my DH will be 27 tomorrow .  We have been married for almost 6 years and have also decided not to have children.  It is funny because when I was younger, like 14-15, I could not wait to get married and have kids but slowly as I have gotten older and discussed it more with my husband the less and less I want to have children, until now I am pretty much 100% on not having children.
> I think that it is funny that our families completely support us in this decision, even though my mother wants grandchildren so badly she once offered to raise them if I would just have them, I am pretty sure she was joking .  But it is my coworkers, patients (I am also an RN), and strangers that cannot seem to fathom it.  Most of our friends have realized we are serious about not wanting kids.  I love that their first response is "but you would be such a good mom/dad" Not to sound concieted but I know I would be a good mom, but there are times that I barely want to put the effort into training my dog, so I am pretty sure that I would not want to put the effort into raising children properly.
> Wow I think this may be the longest post I have done, guess I needed to vent to those who understand. I will post later unless you kick me off for being long winded




 

Vent all you want, that's what we do here sometimes.  We enjoy talking about all sorts of subjects, especially our fur babies as you have probably noticed.  Have a magical day!


----------



## Liisa

PhotobearSam said:


> I know what you mean...I get the "But you would make god parents and don't you want a Little Richard or Samantha running around"...Ummmm NO.




Ha Ha... my mom always told me "you have no patience, you better never have kids!"  I don't think she ever really thought I'd take that advice to heart.  But she is right, I really don't have alot of patience.


----------



## starwarsdisney

Wow, it's nice to see that there are other people out there that get these kids questions all the time. My wife and I knew we didn't want kids before we even got married. Now, don't get me wrong I like kids...I just don't want any of my own. That's what nephews and nieces are for, right? Both our families understand (it helps that there are kids on both sides now), but friends and co-workers just don't get it. Were very happy without kids and to be honest kids would just not work for us. I personally don't see what kids would add to our realtionship.


----------



## Wishes n Dreams

starwarsdisney said:


> Now, don't get me wrong I like kids...I just don't want any of my own.



I completely agree, I get so irritated when people say, so what you don't like kids.  No I really do enjoy kids, for the most part, but I like giving them back just as much.   
I just wish people would get that just because they ask me the same question over and over again does not mean that they will eventually get a different answer.  Especially after all the complaints that I hear about their "angels" day after day/


----------



## Hixski

Wishes n Dreams said:


> I completely agree, I get so irritated when people say, so what you don't like kids.  No I really do enjoy kids, for the most part, but I like giving them back just as much.
> I just wish people would get that just because they ask me the same question over and over again does not mean that they will eventually get a different answer.  Especially after all the complaints that I hear about their "angels" day after day/



You know that's what gets me the most. The ones that endlessly ask you (or worse tell you) that you must have children act like they can't stand their own. We have said many times that those are the ones miserable with their own kids and want everybody to suffer since they are.


----------



## starwarsdisney

Wishes n Dreams said:


> I completely agree, I get so irritated when people say, so what you don't like kids.  No I really do enjoy kids, for the most part, but I like giving them back just as much.
> I just wish people would get that just because they ask me the same question over and over again does not mean that they will eventually get a different answer.  Especially after all the complaints that I hear about their "angels" day after day/




That is such a great point. I hate hearing that I should have kids from people that complain about their's. I think "angels" is the right way to put it.

I do like kids, I just don't want any. In fact I've coached youth soccer before and found it very rewarding. I just don't want to have to deal with that on a daily basis.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Hixski said:


> We have said many times that those are the ones miserable with their own kids and want everybody to suffer since they are.



This statement is so true, misery loves company!  I can't tell you how many people ask us, "don't you wonder what your life will be like when your in your senior years?  Not having any grandchildren running around, won't you be bored?"  Ah, NO!  DH & I have been married for 20 years now & together a total of 26, we have a great relationship and enjoy each other's company immensely.  Sometimes I think that is what they are jealous about, the great relationship we have, the traveling that we do and not to mention going home to peace & quiet at the end of the work day.


----------



## Wishes n Dreams

Sorry I just have to share because I am sooooo excited, and I know you will appreciate my Disney fever .  DH and I are going on the westbound panama canal cruise and we just paid up, yea .  15 nights on the Magic, I am in love .  Anyway, I just wanted to share with people that won't say, "why are you going on disney, isn't that just for kids?" to which a I say a resounding NO!  well thanks for letting be get out some of the excitement!


----------



## Hixski

Wishes n Dreams said:


> Sorry I just have to share because I am sooooo excited, and I know you will appreciate my Disney fever .  DH and I are going on the westbound panama canal cruise and we just paid up, yea .  15 nights on the Magic, I am in love .  Anyway, I just wanted to share with people that won't say, "why are you going on disney, isn't that just for kids?" to which a I say a resounding NO!  well thanks for letting be get out some of the excitement!



Ooohhhh, lucky you!!!!!! I'm sure you will have a blast. I told DH that one day I want to go on one of the Panama canal cruises. It would be better if it is Disney but I could do another cruise line for that. Of course I also told him I want to do an around the world cruise too!!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Wishes n Dreams said:


> Sorry I just have to share because I am sooooo excited, and I know you will appreciate my Disney fever .  DH and I are going on the westbound panama canal cruise and we just paid up, yea .  15 nights on the Magic, I am in love .  Anyway, I just wanted to share with people that won't say, "why are you going on disney, isn't that just for kids?" to which a I say a resounding NO!  well thanks for letting be get out some of the excitement!



Yeah for you and DH!!! DH and I have wanted to go on a Disney cruise but have been a little leary, lots more kiddies and less places for us to hide!   I hope you two have a wonderful time!


----------



## Wishes n Dreams

TKDisneylover said:


> DH and I have wanted to go on a Disney cruise but have been a little leary, lots more kiddies and less places for us to hide!



DH and I have been on 2 cruises on DCL and haven't been bothered with kids too much, there are adult only places and for at sea days there are a lot of adult only activities like cooking classes, beer tasting etc.  Plus since disney has such great kid activities lots of the little ones are in different areas. 
I can't compare to other cruise lines since DCL is the only one we have been on, but we loved it


----------



## Dee & Greg

maddhatir said:


> OMG Lis- she is SO lucky she will be living with you all! She might scare the bejeezus out of Yeti at first! Yeti will be looking at you like, what are you doing to me mom?!
> 
> People make me so mad when they get a pet and do not think it all the way through! Yes- you need to take into consideration- your pet MAY get large- that is why you RESEARCH! I think in situations like that- they should leave the pet in the nice, cozy, warm house and -rehome- the dopes who got the pet- rehome them to a cold shelter to see what it is like!
> 
> We foster Great Pyrenees for the Indy Great Pyr Rescue.  The newest Pyr that came to the rescue was an owner-release... she said the dog pooped in the yard too much!  Oh come on!  The Dog weighs 100 lbs.!  Should have taught the dog to poop in the house?
> 
> Congrat on your new "baby"... our last rescue made his way from Indiana to Long Island via a "puppy express"


----------



## Liisa

We Love Great Pyrenees!    Actually, we are partial to any big hairy dogs, newfies, pyrenees, st. bernards, tibetans (my poor vacuum)!  

TM Rescue has used "trains" in the past to get dogs around.  It didn't work out this time, but they are a much better way to go.  Tibetans are still a rare breed, so our resources are a bit smaller in terms of people to form the chain.  

That is great that you foster.     We've only had the chance to foster one Tibetan... she was a pup we named Mika.  It was awful to give her up even though she was going to her "forever" home.


----------



## Liisa

By the way, I just found out that my Pari's full sister will be competing at Westminster.  I'm hoping she gets through the breed ring so I can see her on TV in the Group competition.  Pretty exciting.  I feel like we know a celebrity!


----------



## plgrn

Popping in to say hi! If you remember, DH and I were the fencesitters who decided to TTC. Apparently, I can get pregnant just by washing DH's underwear but can't seem to stay that way! After a miscarriage (that was really sad and disappointing...don't get me wrong) I feel like I've been given a second chance!  I can see us having one child maybe in five years or sometime in our 30's, but we're back in the fencesitter category for now. I'm all about enjoying life without a child right now and forever how long that lasts, I want to be around people without kids either!

I've missed intelligent conversation about something other than sippie cups, potty training, and ball practice!!! 
 Can I rejoin ya'll for a while?  It's for my sanity!! 

We joined our local No Kidding chapter (completely up front about our fencesitter status) and have our first get-together in a week and a half. I'm so excited!  

How has everyone been? I have a lot of posts to catch up on.


----------



## Hixski

plgrn said:


> Popping in to say hi! If you remember, DH and I were the fencesitters who decided to TTC. Apparently, I can get pregnant just by washing DH's underwear but can't seem to stay that way! After a miscarriage (that was really sad and disappointing...don't get me wrong) I feel like I've been given a second chance!  I can see us having one child maybe in five years or sometime in our 30's, but we're back in the fencesitter category for now. I'm all about enjoying life without a child right now and forever how long that lasts, I want to be around people without kids either!
> 
> I've missed intelligent conversation about something other than sippie cups, potty training, and ball practice!!!
> Can I rejoin ya'll for a while?  It's for my sanity!!
> 
> We joined our local No Kidding chapter (completely up front about our fencesitter status) and have our first get-together in a week and a half. I'm so excited!
> 
> How has everyone been? I have a lot of posts to catch up on.



Welcome back!!! You know all of us.......we are not the awful, terrible, selfish people that some of them make us out to be. 

Sorry to hear about the miscarriage. We will try to cheer you up here.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Popping in to say hi! If you remember, DH and I were the fencesitters who decided to TTC. Apparently, I can get pregnant just by washing DH's underwear but can't seem to stay that way! After a miscarriage (that was really sad and disappointing...don't get me wrong) I feel like I've been given a second chance!  I can see us having one child maybe in five years or sometime in our 30's, but we're back in the fencesitter category for now. I'm all about enjoying life without a child right now and forever how long that lasts, I want to be around people without kids either!
> 
> I've missed intelligent conversation about something other than sippie cups, potty training, and ball practice!!!
> Can I rejoin ya'll for a while?  It's for my sanity!!
> 
> We joined our local No Kidding chapter (completely up front about our fencesitter status) and have our first get-together in a week and a half. I'm so excited!
> 
> How has everyone been? I have a lot of posts to catch up on.




Hey! Welcome back- sorry to hear about your miscarriage 

You can hang with us as long as you want!

Just a kid story from my Mexico trip last week-- One day we sat near this family with one little girl, she may have been about 4? The entire time we were laying there- (It was hours) The father had to comment on every single thing the kids did, and the father had a very loud voice- and not only that, the little girl talked the entire time! (it reminded me of listening to 100s of seagulls squawking)Both her and her father's voice were searing my brian! I wanted to scream JUST SHUT UP! Why must you comment on what your kid is doing every 5 minutes!

I was not feeling great so I was laying in the shade. DH came back from snorkeling and I was making one of my "OMG!" faces so he moved me to another spot further away from the chatty family! Get this- the little girl walks up to the people that were the next "beach hut" over and she started talking to the woman- and the father did not even tell her to come back over with them! The kid was there for a very long time. I looked over and it seemed like the woman was reading to the child and the woman's husband was laying there with his eyes closed- I guarantee he just didn't want to be bothered!

I am sorry- I know everyone here has to say- "it's not like I do not like kids......" But guess what- I don't! I don't want a stranger's child hanging out bothering me on the beach or anywhere else for that matter- I could not even imagine what I would have done if the kid came over to me and was hanging out in "my space" 

Why do people think you do not mind their kids bugging you! My SIL is like that with her kids. My niece will go up to anyone and my SIL just laughs, hello SIL- maybe those people do not want to be bothered!

Sorry for the vent. But I am back!


----------



## Hixski

Welcome back Madd!!

Just for the record I am one that says I don't hate kids but.......I don't want to entertain the little buggers so their parents don't have too!!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

plgrn said:


> Popping in to say hi! If you remember, DH and I were the fencesitters who decided to TTC. Apparently, I can get pregnant just by washing DH's underwear but can't seem to stay that way! After a miscarriage (that was really sad and disappointing...don't get me wrong) I feel like I've been given a second chance!  I can see us having one child maybe in five years or sometime in our 30's, but we're back in the fencesitter category for now. I'm all about enjoying life without a child right now and forever how long that lasts, I want to be around people without kids either!
> 
> I've missed intelligent conversation about something other than sippie cups, potty training, and ball practice!!!
> Can I rejoin ya'll for a while?  It's for my sanity!!
> 
> We joined our local No Kidding chapter (completely up front about our fencesitter status) and have our first get-together in a week and a half. I'm so excited!
> 
> How has everyone been? I have a lot of posts to catch up on.



So sorry to hear about your miscarriage.  I hope that everything works out okay for you and your DH in whatever decision you make in the future.  Welcome back by the way!  I have never heard of a "No Kidding chapter" before and I'm assuming it's a group for people w/o kids, but just curious, what does this chapter do?



maddhatir said:


> Hey! Welcome back- sorry to hear about your miscarriage
> 
> You can hang with us as long as you want!
> 
> Just a kid story from my Mexico trip last week-- One day we sat near this family with one little girl, she may have been about 4? The entire time we were laying there- (It was hours) The father had to comment on every single thing the kids did, and the father had a very loud voice- and not only that, the little girl talked the entire time! (it reminded me of listening to 100s of seagulls squawking)Both her and her father's voice were searing my brian! I wanted to scream JUST SHUT UP! Why must you comment on what your kid is doing every 5 minutes!
> 
> I was not feeling great so I was laying in the shade. DH came back from snorkeling and I was making one of my "OMG!" faces so he moved me to another spot further away from the chatty family! Get this- the little girl walks up to the people that were the next "beach hut" over and she started talking to the woman- and the father did not even tell her to come back over with them! The kid was there for a very long time. I looked over and it seemed like the woman was reading to the child and the woman's husband was laying there with his eyes closed- I guarantee he just didn't want to be bothered!
> 
> I am sorry- I know everyone here has to say- "it's not like I do not like kids......" But guess what- I don't! I don't want a stranger's child hanging out bothering me on the beach or anywhere else for that matter- I could not even imagine what I would have done if the kid came over to me and was hanging out in "my space"
> 
> Why do people think you do not mind their kids bugging you! My SIL is like that with her kids. My niece will go up to anyone and my SIL just laughs, hello SIL- maybe those people do not want to be bothered!
> 
> Sorry for the vent. But I am back!



Welcome back home!  So how did the trip go other than the annoying child?  Did your DH's meds kick in so he was feeling better by the time you arrived at your resort?

By the way, had that child came over by me I would have kept telling her that her daddy is calling her and she'd better get going quickly.  I've been known to make things up when kids do that type of thing, especially when I'm not in the mood to deal with them!  Sometimes I feel like W.C. Fields and want to say, "get away from me kid, your botherin' me!"  And I don't hate kids either, but like you said when your sitting on the beach you definitely do not need a child bugging you while your relaxing!

I hope the rest of the trip went smoothly for you.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Hixski said:


> Welcome back Madd!!
> 
> Just for the record I am one that says I don't hate kids but.......I don't want to entertain the little buggers so their parents don't have too!!!



Amen...But I seem to only like the kids that I care about (Nieces, nephews, friend's kid, etc) and the odd child who is doing something cute at the time...but I don't like kids talking to me. I am missing the gene that allows me to understand child speak and I usually can't get a word they are saying and I find it annoying. 

I don't hate kids but I don't like strange kids I don't know either...I am just built this way.

As for fence sitting, it's hard for me to understand. I think I have always known that I did not want kids...My Barbies never had kids, they owned bars and restaurants. I have always been sure. I guess I am just lucky that way. (Not that fence sitting is bad, I just have never been there so I don't get it)


----------



## zima-cheryl

PhotobearSam said:


> I don't hate kids but I don't like strange kids I don't know either...I am just built this way.



Heck - I don't like most strange people I don't know, be they kids or adults


----------



## zima-cheryl

TKDisneylover said:


> I have never heard of a "No Kidding chapter" before and I'm assuming it's a group for people w/o kids, but just curious, what does this chapter do?



We have a No Kidding group here in W. Mass. & it is all about the food for us.  About once a month we get together at a different restaurant for good food & conversation.  Last month was an Indian restaurant, I think next month is German food.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

PhotobearSam said:


> Amen...But I seem to only like the kids that I care about (Nieces, nephews, friend's kid, etc) and the odd child who is doing something cute at the time...but I don't like kids talking to me. I am missing the gene that allows me to understand child speak and I usually can't get a word they are saying and I find it annoying.
> 
> I don't hate kids but I don't like strange kids I don't know either...I am just built this way.
> 
> As for fence sitting, it's hard for me to understand. I think I have always known that I did not want kids...My Barbies never had kids, they owned bars and restaurants. I have always been sure. I guess I am just lucky that way. (Not that fence sitting is bad, I just have never been there so I don't get it)




I'm the same way! I like my niece and the occasional kids...heck I have to be able to handle them...I substitute elementary school. So I can't say I hate kids...I just have a VERY strong dislike...like you...I can't really understand the fencesitting. I think you either are a kid person or not. I don't understand not being sure, but maybe just because I've always be SO sure I never wanted kids.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Hey! Welcome back- sorry to hear about your miscarriage
> 
> You can hang with us as long as you want!





Hixski said:


> Welcome back!!! You know all of us.......we are not the awful, terrible, selfish people that some of them make us out to be.
> 
> Sorry to hear about the miscarriage. We will try to cheer you up here.





TKDisneylover said:


> So sorry to hear about your miscarriage.  I hope that everything works out okay for you and your DH in whatever decision you make in the future.  Welcome back by the way!



Thanks guys! It feels good to be back. After the miscarriage, my midwife recommended a very simple solution to the problem...we're not talking in-vitro, Clomid, ANYTHING like that. So, normal people would have jumped right on the opportunity and continued trying to make a baby. Me and DH?? It just put us back on the fence and out of the game for a few more years. And thinking "maybe we were being stupid and this is God giving us a second change to ENJOY LIFE!" We are so screwed up and indecisive.  

The other side of the fence is soooo scary (see my little siggy looking frightened out of his mind?)


----------



## plgrn

zima-cheryl said:


> We have a No Kidding group here in W. Mass. & it is all about the food for us.  About once a month we get together at a different restaurant for good food & conversation.  Last month was an Indian restaurant, I think next month is German food.



Ours is brand new and we are meeting at a Nothing But Noodles. I can't wait to meet people who like to talk about travel, furbabies, education, careers, and anything else intelligent! Anything but cartoons and ball games!  

So how many people do you have in your group and how long have you been going?


----------



## plgrn

PhotobearSam said:


> Amen...But I seem to only like the kids that I care about (Nieces, nephews, friend's kid, etc) and the odd child who is doing something cute at the time..
> 
> I don't hate kids but I don't like strange kids I don't know either...I am just built this way.



Exactly! 





PhotobearSam said:


> My Barbies never had kids, they owned bars and restaurants.



That is adorable!  





Shyvioletisme said:


> I'm the same way! I like my niece and the occasional kids...heck I have to be able to handle them...I substitute elementary school. So I can't say I hate kids...I just have a VERY strong dislike...like you...I can't really understand the fencesitting. I think you either are a kid person or not. I don't understand not being sure, but maybe just because I've always be SO sure I never wanted kids.



That must be such a luxury to "just know"  I've got to get off this fence at some point. I'm getting a wedgie.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Just a kid story from my Mexico trip last week--




So how was your trip? Did you cruise or fly? What part of Mexico?

DH and I took a Carnival cruise to Cozumel and Progreso back in September for our 5th anniversary. Progreso was so charming and we loved the ruins. I guess we should have done a shore excursion in Cozumel b/c all we saw was the crappy, touristy shopping area that we HATED. The water was pretty though.

And...there were like 6 kids on the whole ship. It was freaking awesome!


----------



## zima-cheryl

plgrn said:


> Ours is brand new and we are meeting at a Nothing But Noodles. I can't wait to meet people who like to talk about travel, furbabies, education, careers, and anything else intelligent! Anything but cartoons and ball games!
> 
> So how many people do you have in your group and how long have you been going?



See - it is all about the food!   

The NK group here has been around since '04.  DH & I got involved about 2 or 3 years ago.  It ranges from 4 to 12 folks, mostly couples, but the occassional single, at any given get together.

DH & I make it about 4 or 5 times a year.  And you are right, it is so nice to talk "grown up" for an entire evening.  We usually have lots of talk about other restaurants to try, furbabies (pictures required), travel and home projects.  It is a lot of fun.


----------



## Hixski

PhotobearSam said:


> My Barbies never had kids, they owned bars and restaurants.



My Barbies had a thing for my brothers GI Joes! They thought Ken was a bit metrosexual! 

Come to think of it my Barbies never had babies either!!!! They had the house and and cars though!


----------



## plgrn

Hixski said:


> They thought Ken was a bit metrosexual!



He is! I can remember finding a Marine Corps Ken and being so excited. The Barbies all fought over him of course.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

plgrn said:


> DH and I took a Carnival cruise to Cozumel and Progreso back in September for our 5th anniversary. Progreso was so charming and we loved the ruins. I guess we should have done a shore excursion in Cozumel b/c all we saw was the crappy, touristy shopping area that we HATED. The water was pretty though.
> 
> And...there were like 6 kids on the whole ship. It was freaking awesome!



how did you like Carnival??...I hear both good and really bad things about the ships..ie..cleanliness, the unfriendliness of the staff...but they have such good deals....DH and I are really looking into taking a cruise, but are finding it hard to pick a cruise line...


----------



## plgrn

Shyvioletisme said:


> how did you like Carnival??...I hear both good and really bad things about the ships..ie..cleanliness, the unfriendliness of the staff...but they have such good deals....DH and I are really looking into taking a cruise, but are finding it hard to pick a cruise line...




The price was right! DH and I did a 5 day cruise in September (hurricane season) for $600 TOTAL...parking, gas, spending money, excursions, EVERYTHING! We cruised on Carnival's oldest and smallest ship, The Holiday because it leaves from Mobile and we live in north Alabama. Next time we will save our money and fly to a different port of call with a bigger ship. We don't drink, and there wasn't much else to do on the ship!  Plus, DH didn't like the rocking that was worse b/c of the ship size. 

If you're looking for a cheap little getaway though it's worth it! I'd like to take a Royal Caribbean Cruise next time.


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> We have a No Kidding group here in W. Mass. & it is all about the food for us.  About once a month we get together at a different restaurant for good food & conversation.  Last month was an Indian restaurant, I think next month is German food.



Good to know.  I will have to see if we have something like that here in our area.  It would be nice to get together with other c/f couples.  We have met other couples at restaurant/bars (after dinner cocktail) that we connect with and it never fails that they end up having kids.



Shyvioletisme said:


> how did you like Carnival??...I hear both good and really bad things about the ships..ie..cleanliness, the unfriendliness of the staff...but they have such good deals....DH and I are really looking into taking a cruise, but are finding it hard to pick a cruise line...



I have also done Carnival cruises, one out of New Orleans with my best friend when we celebrated our 40th b-days.  That was on the Conquest and it's a beautiful ship.  Very clean, the staff were very friendly and the food was excellent.  Our stops were Jamaica, Grand Caymen & Cozumel.  Then the second one was also with my best friend, and an ex co-worker & his partner who had relocated to Florida.  We left out of Miami on a 4-night cruise to Key West & Cozumel.  It was on an older ship, the Fascination, but it had just been refurbished that year.  It was very clean, friendly staff, and seemed like a party ship, lots of different ages but everyone was there to have a good time.  We paid $225 each for the cruise and I flew into Tampa for $218, my friend had drove from Alabama to pick me up and meet up with my friends in Venice, they we drove together down to Miami.  It was definitely a nice cheap trip!  And on both cruises I might have seen approximately 10 kids, they were never a problem.  We are hoping to go again this October and DH is finally going to go along (he was always opposed to being "on a big ship in the middle of nowhere"), but when I got back and talked about all the fun we had and the ports he changed his mind.  Now he's excited about going.  My best friend lives in Birmingham, AL so we may leave out of Mobile, or we're thinking of doing a New Orleans one again and staying a couple extra days to party in N.O.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

plgrn said:


> Popping in to say hi! If you remember, DH and I were the fencesitters who decided to TTC. Apparently, I can get pregnant just by washing DH's underwear but can't seem to stay that way! After a miscarriage (that was really sad and disappointing...don't get me wrong) I feel like I've been given a second chance!  I can see us having one child maybe in five years or sometime in our 30's, but we're back in the fencesitter category for now. I'm all about enjoying life without a child right now and forever how long that lasts, I want to be around people without kids either!
> 
> I've missed intelligent conversation about something other than sippie cups, potty training, and ball practice!!!
> Can I rejoin ya'll for a while?  It's for my sanity!!
> 
> We joined our local No Kidding chapter (completely up front about our fencesitter status) and have our first get-together in a week and a half. I'm so excited!
> 
> How has everyone been? I have a lot of posts to catch up on.


 Hi, plgrn!  I just wanted you to know I completely understand the whole fencesitting thing.  And it really is maddening at times.  Sometimes I do wish I could just be done with it and be satisfied and content and KNOW that I DON'T want kids but then I'll have this stupid little twinge  .  I don't know about you but it's can really be frustrating.  I'll just share a little bit of my experience (if you don't mind).  When we first got married my DH was A-D-A-M-A-N-T he didn't want kids but he was only 19 and I was cough-cough 23 and I figured he'd grow into the idea.  We didn't even try for like 2 years and I used birth control pills religiously.  When I turned 25 I decided Iwas ready and it was Hhhhhhaaaarrrrddd to convince DH, now 21, that he was ready too.  I don't think I had him all the way convinced.  But I started trying.    I've always had extremely excruciating cramps.  I'm talking can't get out of bed wish I would DIE cramps!!!  As long as I was on birth control pills I was fine but he very first month I didn't take them, the pain was back with a vengeance!  At every doctor's visit I had w/ my gyno since the first time I went at 18 (but had the pain since onset of period) I always complained about the severe pain.  They always told me that all girls have some discomfort with their periods.  I crack up because this wasn't some "discomfort" I'm talking I physically got sick from the pain!!  But for whatever reason I apparently didn't express that well enough to the doctors.  They just gave me birth control pills and that was that.  When I went off the pill at 25 we tried (or I tried) for a year.  I did everything! Charted temps, laid there w/ legs in the air til my butt went numb. . . even tried a crazy fertility diet and NOTHING.  I eat, slept, breathed TTC (it was making me a bit nutty). I went to the doctors told them we were trying (told them about the pain  ) and they started doing a workup on me.  I had a few tests done (by this time DH relented to being tested) and it was concluded they had no idea why we couldn't have kids and that we should be able to and just relax and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.  Finally, after about 2 more years a good friend of mine convinced me to see a fertility specialist.  I actually had a lap w/ him and it was discovered I had stage 4 endo (there are ONLY 4 stages).  But, he said he cauterized it and go ahead and try again.  Again, I started to eat, sleep, dream, breath baby!!  And NOTHING.  I was totally obsessed and the terribly BAD thing was I had NO friends w/out kids!!!  I thought I _needed_ kids!  I didn't know how to get off the crazy merry-go-round of TTC and I didn't like who I was becoming.  We even tried adopting but the mother changed her mind last minute.  It was at that point that something inside both me and DH snapped.  And it was like in that moment we decided our life was/is A-OK without kids.  I'm serious, it was almost instantaneously.  I don't know if we were shocked back into reality or what but off the TTC merry-go-round we came!!   I went back onto birth control pills (and the pain stopped) I finally was able to concentrate on my endo disease and seek a specialist.  I had excision surgery and was given the ok to TTC.  But, DH and I had different plans of selling our home, relocating to another state, heading into different career for DH.  DH and I decided that we really did have a great life and quite frankly kids got on our NERVES!!  When we really thought about it.  We don't hate kids or even dislike them but they really do drive us crazy.  We credit it to being settled in our lives and routine and kids disturb our peace. So I went back on the pill just incase   (still no pain  ).  
But, we're finally settled in down here and I'm telling ya' there are still times when I have those passing moments of wanting a child.  I don't know why, I can't explain it but there are times I'm right back on that fence.  Times when I feel panicky.  Like I said, I don't know why.  I can't explain it and I still say it's maddending!!  It's like you'll be go along living life, doing your own thing . . . and then you'll see the cutest baby and all of a sudden you'll get this twinge.  I don't know, maybe I'm confusing gas or an eye twitch with the twinge.  But, it's definately something and then you have these feelings like.  "Should I??"  "What if I regret it later when it's too late???"  

Anyway, there's my like 6 year struggled condensed to two paragraphs.

One of the things that has been the biggest help for me was getting away from friends that all had kids.  And one friend in particular that fueled my insanity  (and that's all I'll say about that  ). 


maddhatir said:


> I am sorry- I know everyone here has to say- "it's not like I do not like kids......" But guess what- I don't! I don't want a stranger's child hanging out bothering me on the beach or anywhere else for that matter- I could not even imagine what I would have done if the kid came over to me and was hanging out in "my space"
> 
> 
> Sorry for the vent. But I am back!


  You sound just like my DH!!   



plgrn said:


> That must be such a luxury to "just know"  I've got to get off this fence at some point. I'm getting a wedgie.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

zima-cheryl said:


> We have a No Kidding group here in W. Mass. & it is all about the food for us.  About once a month we get together at a different restaurant for good food & conversation.  Last month was an Indian restaurant, I think next month is German food.


I would    to have one of these in our area!!  I tried finding one when we lived in little 'ol Delaware and again when we moved down here.  I thought, surely, there will be on in Greenville.  Nope!  I think DH and I would do well in a group like this.  While I'm kind of outgoing DH is not unless he's familliar with you.  In a group I think we could blossom as opposed to trying to make cold contacts.  Plus, it would be wonderful to have a group where you know they're not going to have kids!  Right now we're friends with a couple who, at this time, do not have kids.  She's 23 and he's 30.  They've had 2 miscarriages but I think they're going to try one more time (at least).  So while it's all fun right now, I don't know that we'll remain bossom buddies if she has a kid.  And our other friend is a batchelor right now.  But he's started dating a girl and it looks like it's going to get serious and now he's rethinking the kid thing.    98% of the time I'm not into kids.  DH, 100% of the time.  How wonderful to have other friends who think like us.  What's worse for us, we're Catholic and the Catholic mantra is "Procreate, Procreate, Procreate!!".


----------



## Mozart

This is my first time reading this thread.  3 things immediately caught my attentiong.

To the shyvioletisme - no kids here.  Done 2 cruises on Disney.  Will never do another cruise line again.  If you like WDW, you'll love DCL.  Yeah, it's more expensive than Carnival or RCCL, but it's worth it.

The second thing that caught my attention is that beautiful TigerPaw in the signature of ForTheLoveofDisney.  Gotta love seeing something that beautiful on here!

As for this statement:



ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> I thought, surely, there will be on in Greenville.  Nope!  I think DH and I would do well in a group like this.  While I'm kind of outgoing DH is not unless he's familliar with you.



In Greenville?


----------



## plgrn

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Hi, plgrn!  I just wanted you to know I completely understand the whole fencesitting thing.  And it really is maddening at times.  Sometimes I do wish I could just be done with it and be satisfied and content and KNOW that I DON'T want kids but then I'll have this stupid little twinge  .  I don't know about you but it's can really be frustrating.
> 
> Like I said, I don't know why.  I can't explain it and I still say it's maddending!!  It's like you'll be go along living life, doing your own thing . . . and then you'll see the cutest baby and all of a sudden you'll get this twinge.  I don't know, maybe I'm confusing gas or an eye twitch with the twinge.  But, it's definately something and then you have these feelings like.  "Should I??"  "What if I regret it later when it's too late???"



My sentiments EXACTLY! At least you got completely off the fence at one point. I'm not even will to chart my cycle and take some herbs! Right now I'm leaning toward being childless and if I have regrets, looking into adoption. Adoption has always been on my heart, so we'll see. Although that will probably produce a whole other fence for me to sit on!  



ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> One of the things that has been the biggest help for me was getting away from friends that all had kids.



Yes, yes, yes!!! We have one set of friends our age without kids (who have no immediate plans for them either) and we have SO MUCH fun together. Whenever I'm around them I have no desire to procreate. That should tell me something! I don't mind people around people and their kids, but I need some balance! Whatever the future brings, I want to absolutely REVEL in the fact that I am not tied down with a child right now. Thank God for this thread and the No Kidding group.  I know I'm not a "true" c/f woman, but thanks for letting me be included guys. It's so nice to discuss life without kids.


----------



## plgrn

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> What's worse for us, we're Catholic and the Catholic mantra is "Procreate, Procreate, Procreate!!".



Catholics and Mormons get the big family stereotype, but I'm telling you that Baptists are trying to enter the competition now!  Our thing is getting married young (ok so we lived up to that one) and even if you don't have a bunch of kids, giving birth at least 2 or 3 times within the first 5 years of marriage. *sigh* We're the Baptist oddballs who don't have kids and like to watch Family Guy.  

The more I think about it, maybe it's not a religious thing anymore so much as a society thing. For example, I was looking to meet some people in the area that shared similar interests (childed or not, whatever) so I went to Meetup.com. Everything in our area is either pagan/wiccan interests (what would be my Baptist witch name?  ) or Moms of preschoolers. I swear to God there are at least 5 Mommy meetups here not to mention breastfeeding, potty-training, and natural birthing groups.  Next, they will have a pagan/wiccan breastfeeding mothers of preschoolers meetup, but God-forbid we have anything for runners, scrapbookers, movie lovers, or anything else that defines us outside having offspring!


----------



## plgrn

You know the cute little iTink, iStitch, iJasmine avatars floating around? How about this one?






There is so much sarcastic childfree stuff out there...I'm loving it. Even the childed should appreciate these things....unless they are trolls with no sense of humor.


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## ForTheLoveofDisney

Mozart said:


> This is my first time reading this thread.  3 things immediately caught my attentiong.


  Well, don't let it be your last, neighbor!!  



Mozart said:


> To the shyvioletisme - no kids here.  Done 2 cruises on Disney.  Will never do another cruise line again.  If you like WDW, you'll love DCL.  Yeah, it's more expensive than Carnival or RCCL, but it's worth it.
> 
> The second thing that caught my attention is that beautiful TigerPaw in the signature of ForTheLoveofDisney.  Gotta love seeing something that beautiful on here!
> 
> As for this statement:
> 
> 
> 
> In Greenville?


 I know, I know. . .   Now I know better.  

I love the TigerPaw too!!  DH and I both work at Clemson now.  We're staff at the University and we love it! 




plgrn said:


> My sentiments EXACTLY! At least you got completely off the fence at one point. I'm not even will to chart my cycle and take some herbs! Right now I'm leaning toward being childless and if I have regrets, looking into adoption. Adoption has always been on my heart, so we'll see. Although that will probably produce a whole other fence for me to sit on!  .


 Yea', I'd like to think I did but that still didn't mean that I didn't/don't get a prick in my heart when I'm around a baby and I still don't go out of my way to be around them.  I'm not sure if it's because I *might* want one and I can't have one or if it's a bit of anger that I have no control over having one (which is NOT a good reason to have a kid!!!!!  I'm at least sensible enought to know that that kind of thinking is just stupid selfishness).


plgrn said:


> Yes, yes, yes!!! We have one set of friends our age without kids (who have no immediate plans for them either) and we have SO MUCH fun together. Whenever I'm around them I have no desire to procreate. That should tell me something! I don't mind people around people and their kids, but I need some balance! Whatever the future brings, I want to absolutely REVEL in the fact that I am not tied down with a child right now. Thank God for this thread and the No Kidding group.  I know I'm not a "true" c/f woman, but thanks for letting me be included guys. It's so nice to discuss life without kids.


I know, isn't that great?   When I lived in Delaware I'm not even kidding when I say all of our friends had kids.  I didn't even get the opportunity to know what fun it is to be around people that don't have kids.  I just always felt like I was missing out.  And who could help feel like that when you were surrounded by people telling you you were missing out and encouraging you to pursue *whatever* means possible to have them. It was like blasphemey to say you might not want them.  And to have them preaching it like "Thus saith the Lord, 'You're not a good Christian/Catholic if you don't have them.'".  There were times when I truly felt like a second class citizen.  Now I'm sure people will say "Well *you* let them make you feel that way. . . No one can make you 'anything' without you letting them."  And yes, that's probably true, but it's really easy to say something like that when they're not going through it or not in the middle of feeling helpless.  Let's just say it was a bad time for me and I am SO thankful we had the opportunity to move!!


----------



## Hixski

If you read alot of the problems and questions people ask on the Families boards it might help with the fencesitting. If after reading how much trouble people have with schools, other mommies, other kids, etc, etc, etc you might not think being CF is so bad and jump for good to this side of the fence. 

Look at it this way.......if you regret not having children you could still adopt later. If you have a child and realize later you weren't meant to have one......well that is a whole nother ballgame to deal with.


----------



## lazydoxy66

Hi all! This is a very interesting thread. I've always felt a little odd about my choice not to have children. I feel like I always have to explain why. Then sometimes I would feel guilty because I was able to have them while others wanted children and couldn't have any. 
There have been a couple of people raise their eyebrows when I told them we were going to celebrate our 10th anniversary at DW. Hey, we want to have fun!! I can see from this whole forum site that my DH and I are not alone in thinking DW is great for adults too.


----------



## starwarsdisney

lazydoxy66 said:


> Hi all! This is a very interesting thread. I've always felt a little odd about my choice not to have children. I feel like I always have to explain why. Then sometimes I would feel guilty because I was able to have them while others wanted children and couldn't have any.
> There have been a couple of people raise their eyebrows when I told them we were going to celebrate our 10th anniversary at DW. Hey, we want to have fun!! I can see from this whole forum site that my DH and I are not alone in thinking DW is great for adults too.



Your never too old for Disney. Some people say the same thing to my wife and I about not wanting kids and going to Disney for vacation. Were both big kids, so what if we would rather be at Disney World then some beach! By the way welcome to the thread.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

plgrn said:


> ...snipped.... The more I think about it, maybe it's not a religious thing anymore so much as a society thing. For example, I was looking to meet some people in the area that shared similar interests (childed or not, whatever) so I went to Meetup.com. Everything in our area is either pagan/wiccan interests (what would be my Baptist witch name?  ) or Moms of preschoolers. I swear to God there are at least 5 Mommy meetups here not to mention breastfeeding, potty-training, and natural birthing groups.  Next, they will have a pagan/wiccan breastfeeding mothers of preschoolers meetup, but God-forbid we have anything for runners, scrapbookers, movie lovers, or anything else that defines us outside having offspring!


 I am cracking up over here!!   Because you are so right!!!  I tried meetup.com too but they didn't have ANYTHING for childfree and nothing else that interested me.  



Hixski said:


> If you read alot of the problems and questions people ask on the Families boards it might help with the fencesitting. If after reading how much trouble people have with schools, other mommies, other kids, etc, etc, etc you might not think being CF is so bad and jump for good to this side of the fence.
> 
> Look at it this way.......if you regret not having children you could still adopt later. If you have a child and realize later you weren't meant to have one......well that is a whole nother ballgame to deal with.


 You are so right.  And I think that's why, now, I'm more and more at peace with our decision everyday.  When DH and I look at the shape of the world as a whole plus throw in family problems, school problems, other mommy problems I really am glad I don't have a child in this mess.

And truth be told, we really are selfish with our lives and time.  We like what we want when we want.  



lazydoxy66 said:


> Hi all! This is a very interesting thread. I've always felt a little odd about my choice not to have children. I feel like I always have to explain why. Then sometimes I would feel guilty because I was able to have them while others wanted children and couldn't have any.
> There have been a couple of people raise their eyebrows when I told them we were going to celebrate our 10th anniversary at DW. Hey, we want to have fun!! I can see from this whole forum site that my DH and I are not alone in thinking DW is great for adults too.


 Happy Anniversary!!  DH and I just celebrated our 10th.  Not in Disney, though.  We wanted too but we were in the middle of purchasing a new home.


----------



## plgrn

lazydoxy66 said:


> Hi all! This is a very interesting thread. I've always felt a little odd about my choice not to have children. I feel like I always have to explain why. Then sometimes I would feel guilty because I was able to have them while others wanted children and couldn't have any.
> There have been a couple of people raise their eyebrows when I told them we were going to celebrate our 10th anniversary at DW. Hey, we want to have fun!! I can see from this whole forum site that my DH and I are not alone in thinking DW is great for adults too.



Congrats on your 10th!


----------



## plgrn

Has anyone ever taken a Sandals vacation? That's my dreeeeam trip. Actually, my dreeeeam trip would be if Disney bought a Sandals resort.


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> So how was your trip? Did you cruise or fly? What part of Mexico?



We did an all-inclusive (the only way to go!) for 7 days @ The Grand Sirenis in Riviera Maya (I will post some pics later) We flew into Cancun and it took us about 1.5 hours to get to Riviera Maya. This was our 3rd trip to Mexico- I LOVE., LOVE, LOVE it there! The people are so nice!

Our trip was good considering....DH was sick as a dog when we left- he started feeling a bit better by Tuesday and almost 100% by Friday-the day before we came home -- I hurt my back on Thursday while we were there- and I have NO idea how in the world I did it. It was so bad I had to visit the hotel doc Sat morning (the day we were leaving) @ 12:30am! He gave me an anti-inflammatory shot- but the pain did not budge. I am still in pain. Been to the ER on Sunday- shot up with morphine and toridol- again- neither did the trick- they gave me Valium to help with the spasms and that seems the help me a bit- I am not on 600mgs of Motrin and percocets- I got an MRI last night and I have a doc appt today- 

Enough about my back- I LOVE MEXICO!! and everyone should go! 



plgrn said:


> Has anyone ever taken a Sandals vacation? That's my dreeeeam trip. Actually, my dreeeeam trip would be if Disney bought a Sandals resort.



My SIL taught me this........Sandals, Dreams etc are just overpriced all-inclusives. My SIL has been just about everywhere you can think of that has all-inclusives- she will pick and go at any time- she just did it a week before we took our trip- she owns her own salon- she needed to get a way- she called her receptionist and said- cancel all next weeks appts- I am going to Mexico! 

She says you can find an all-inclusive that is just as nice or better than Sandals etc you just have to look. 

Personally I LOVE the RIU Hotels http://www.riu.com/en/hotels/index.html- we stayed at the RIU Cancun and they upgraded us to the RIU Palace in Riviera Maya 2 years ago and OMG- it was beautiful! Top notch! I would certainly go back to a RIU hotel in a heartbeat. 

The Grand Sirenis, where we stayed this time, was nice- It was way too modern for me- I told DH I would probably not go back _only_ b/c of that reason. The service, the grounds, the beach were all perfect- DH said he would go back to that particular hotel b/c the snorkeling was phenomenal! That says a lot for a resort when you do not need to leave the grounds to snorkel. You saw fish as soon as you stepped into the water up to you knees! DH was out snorkeling for hours on our last day.


----------



## starwarsdisney

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> And truth be told, we really are selfish with our lives and time.  We like what we want when we want./QUOTE]
> 
> My wife and I are the same way. I can't imagine coming home from a long day at work and school and having to care for a child. We tell people that we are selfish and we like our life and lifestyle.
> 
> I also wanted to meantion that it's funny when friends have kids. It changes them and the relationship that you have with them changes. One of my groomsmen and a best friend from high school had kids. It changed our relationship with them. We tired to remain friends, but as time went on we just fell away from each other. I was sad at first, but now I understand that they wanted that lifestyle and we wanted another. In the end it's just life and the choices we make I guess. In fact most of our good friends (not all) are either single with no kids or are married with no kids. Both of are families are cool with our choice of not having kids. In fact both sides have said at some point or another that they could not see us having kids. We have nephews on my side and a niece on my wife's side. The family names will live on and we can at least give our nieces and nephews back. We do spoil them though. As for some kids of our own, NO DESIRE WHATSEVER and we like it that way!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

starwarsdisney said:


> ForTheLoveofDisney said:
> 
> 
> 
> And truth be told, we really are selfish with our lives and time.  We like what we want when we want./QUOTE]
> 
> .
> 
> I also wanted to mention that it's funny when friends have kids. It changes them and the relationship that you have with them changes. One of my groomsmen and a best friend from high school had kids. It changed our relationship with them. We tired to remain friends, but as time went on we just fell away from each other. I was sad at first, but now I understand that they wanted that lifestyle and we wanted another. In the end it's just life and the choices we make I guess. In fact most of our good friends (not all) are either single with no kids or are married with no kids. Both of are families are cool with our choice of not having kids. In fact both sides have said at some point or another that they could not see us having kids. We have nephews on my side and a niece on my wife's side. The family names will live on and we can at least give our nieces and nephews back. We do spoil them though. As for some kids of our own, NO DESIRE WHATSEVER and we like it that way!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I so worry about this...one of my best friends is engaged and getting married and she and her fiance want to have 3 or 4 kids...Our relationship has already changed a lot since she started dating the guy(ie all of our little group hate him) so we all worry that once they start having kids we just won't be seeing her. It makes me so sad to think of it because she is one of my closest friends, but her fiance really wants a different lifestyle.
Click to expand...


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

starwarsdisney said:


> My wife and I are the same way. I can't imagine coming home from a long day at work and school and having to care for a child. We tell people that we are selfish and we like our life and lifestyle.


 You go to school to?  That's awesome!!  I really want to go back.  I'm 33 now and it's like I've finally figured out what I *think*   I want to do and it requires schooling.  I work at a University but the one thing that sucks is we only get up to 6 credit hours a semester free and the Univ. doesn't cater to working adults.  We are in the process of hiring a new Director (formerly called a Chair person) and one of the interviewees that we really liked talked about providing time for class work.    I'm thinking, for now, I can get my 2 year degree at night at the community college and then figure out at that point how to finish at the University level.  One step at a time or like Dory says, "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming."  The task of a long journey can seem overwhelming at times but if you break it down into little steps it's not so bad (or so I keep telling myself).



			
				maddhatir said:
			
		

> I hurt my back on Thursday while we were there- and I have NO idea how in the world I did it. It was so bad I had to visit the hotel doc Sat morning (the day we were leaving) @ 12:30am! He gave me an anti-inflammatory shot- but the pain did not budge. I am still in pain. Been to the ER on Sunday- shot up with morphine and toridol- again- neither did the trick- they gave me Valium to help with the spasms and that seems the help me a bit- I am not on 600mgs of Motrin and percocets- I got an MRI last night and I have a doc appt today-


 Ouch!  I'm sorry to hear that happened on your vacation.  Good luck at the doctor's today.  Hopefully they'll find out what's causing you so much pain.  Let us know.



Shyvioletisme said:


> I so worry about this...one of my best friends is engaged and getting married and she and her fiance want to have 3 or 4 kids...Our relationship has already changed a lot since she started dating the guy(ie all of our little group hate him) so we all worry that once they start having kids we just won't be seeing her. It makes me so sad to think of it because she is one of my closest friends, *but her fiance really wants a different lifestyle.*


 See, I think that's the thing with the friend I've made down here. . . I really think she'd be fine without offspring (either biological or adopted).  But, her DH seems to be the one who really wants them.


----------



## plgrn

Sorry about your back, Madd! Hope you feel better soon. 

Thanks for the info about Sandals. I'm thinking of doing an all-inclusive sometime in the the 5 years, so that will give me time to do homework. DH is a little...how shall I put this delicately...CHEAP! so I think an all-inclusive paid for up front trip would be great for us. That's one thing I loved about our cruise: He wasn't agonizing if I ordered a dessert or the most expensive thing on the menu.  Gotta love him!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Sorry about your back, Madd! Hope you feel better soon.
> 
> Thanks for the info about Sandals. I'm thinking of doing an all-inclusive sometime in the the 5 years, so that will give me time to do homework. DH is a little...how shall I put this delicately...CHEAP! so I think an all-inclusive paid for up front trip would be great for us. That's one thing I loved about our cruise: He wasn't agonizing if I ordered a dessert or the most expensive thing on the menu.  Gotta love him!



Well then he will certainly love the all-inclusives! Alcohol and food are included!

You can get some really good prices online- I like to check Apple.com.  I tried BookIt but I was not too happy with them- sometimes the air is not included, not only that- a lot of their flight were not non-stop!- but with Apple you just put in where you are flying from and there is one price, air and hotel. 

I also like to use Baltimore Travel they have some great prices for all-inclusives with flights going out of Philly, Newark, Baltimore and DC and they use Apple !!! My SIL just went to Mexico for 7 days @ The Grand Oasis Playa, air and hotel for 899.00 PP !!!!!! 

You can do Mexico cheaper than Disney! And you get to eat and drink all you want!


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## starwarsdisney

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> You go to school to?  That's awesome!!  I really want to go back.  I'm 33 now and it's like I've finally figured out what I *think*   I want to do and it requires schooling.  I work at a University but the one thing that sucks is we only get up to 6 credit hours a semester free and the Univ. doesn't cater to working adults.  We are in the process of hiring a new Director (formerly called a Chair person) and one of the interviewees that we really liked talked about providing time for class work.    I'm thinking, for now, I can get my 2 year degree at night at the community college and then figure out at that point how to finish at the University level.  One step at a time or like Dory says, "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming."  The task of a long journey can seem overwhelming at times but if you break it down into little steps it's not so bad (or so I keep telling myself).



I'm 31 now so it's never too late to go back. I'm going to a community college right now with plans to transfer to a 4-year school once I'm done. I work about 30 hours a week and attend school full-time. My wife already has a degree, so she's been really supportive of me going back to school.


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## H.E. Pennypacker

Hey, starwarsdisney, just wanted to say "Hi".  We're practically neighbors.  We live about 10 miles west of you.  Nice to see a fellow Dis'er so close to us.

Anyway, to add to the discussion, we're both 35, been together almost 5 years and quite content to not have any children.  Maybe at some point we'll regret not having any, but for me, I know I'm just not the kid type.  Some people probably think I'm selfish, but for the longest time, I did nothing but work at night and go to college during the day, or work all day and go to college at night.  Never had much time for fun.  I've now been at my current job for 10 years, making decent money, and we can afford to take nice trips and buy nice things and quite frankly, kids are expensive.  I know - I was an expensive one myself.  So I guess if wanting to have fun and enjoy life and not having to worry about what to do with the kids is selfish, count me in!  All I know is we're having a great time enjoying life now while we're able to do it instead of waiting "until the kids are gone."  I think our only problem is that we don't have many couples our age we really identify with because they all have kids and we don't, so our social circle is, shall we say, pretty much non-existent.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> I also like to use Baltimore Travel they have some great prices for all-inclusives with flights going out of Philly, Newark, Baltimore and DC and they use Apple !!! My SIL just went to Mexico for 7 days @ The Grand Oasis Playa, air and hotel for 899.00 PP !!!!!!



That is freaking awesome! Our wedding anniversary happens to be during hurricane season, so I'm thinking of booking something then in hopes that it will be cheaper. DH and I don't drink, so I'd really like to find an all-inclusive that's everything BUT drinks (if there is such a thing  ). I don't mind being around drinking, but would feel like I'm paying for something I won't be using. Make sense? Hmmm...Maybe I could airmail our share of booze to you for a nominal fee.


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## starwarsdisney

H.E. Pennypacker said:


> Hey, starwarsdisney, just wanted to say "Hi".  We're practically neighbors.  We live about 10 miles west of you.  Nice to see a fellow Dis'er so close to us.
> 
> Anyway, to add to the discussion, we're both 35, been together almost 5 years and quite content to not have any children.  Maybe at some point we'll regret not having any, but for me, I know I'm just not the kid type.  Some people probably think I'm selfish, but for the longest time, I did nothing but work at night and go to college during the day, or work all day and go to college at night.  Never had much time for fun.  I've now been at my current job for 10 years, making decent money, and we can afford to take nice trips and buy nice things and quite frankly, kids are expensive.  I know - I was an expensive one myself.  So I guess if wanting to have fun and enjoy life and not having to worry about what to do with the kids is selfish, count me in!  All I know is we're having a great time enjoying life now while we're able to do it instead of waiting "until the kids are gone."  I think our only problem is that we don't have many couples our age we really identify with because they all have kids and we don't, so our social circle is, shall we say, pretty much non-existent.



Well hello, nice to see a fellow Lake County person. I can tell you that after all this snow and cold I'm ready to go and leave it all behind in May. I just wish May was oh I don't know, tomorrow! 

I know what you're saying about couples in our age group with kids. Most of our friends are either single or married with no children. We do hang out with family quite a bit too. Don't get me wrong we have some friends with kids, but not many. We tend to shy away from having our friends with kids over (family is different) because our house is not set up for kids, nor do we want it to be. While we don't have the best stuff, we like to keep it nice. Kids just seems like a chore to us, maybe that's just the selfish side of us. Were okay with that though. I'm fine with kids that I can give back! I've coached soccer for 5 and 6 year olds before and can tell you I loved it, but man I'm glad at the end of practice they go home with someone else. I guess it's all about choices. I actually think that couples not wanting kids is becoming more popular, but we are still looked at as somewhat odd. I mean who doesn't want to have a screaming child to look after all the time (I'm exagrating of course, but sometimes it seems like that).


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## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> That is freaking awesome! Our wedding anniversary happens to be during hurricane season, so I'm thinking of booking something then in hopes that it will be cheaper. DH and I don't drink, so I'd really like to find an all-inclusive that's everything BUT drinks (if there is such a thing  ). I don't mind being around drinking, but would feel like I'm paying for something I won't be using. Make sense? Hmmm...Maybe I could airmail our share of booze to you for a nominal fee.



But when you get a price like 899.00PP- it does not matter if you drink! You can eat all day long, as much as you want, and that would make up for the drinks- but you can drink anything- they have sodas, virgin drinks, etc- 

Our resort had a free standing coffee bar- I would get the best cappuccino every day after I would leave the beach, on the way back to the room. She would foam up the milk by hand- no hitting the button in the coffee shop!

You can also get cappuccinos, lattes, espresso, coffee from their cappuccino machine in the buffet all day long- and the machines make them GREAT too! The foam was always perfect every time! 

You have to figure- when you go to Starbucks you pay almost 4 bucks per coffee there!


----------



## ChisJo

So - I was work the other day and got the rudest comment by one of the women that work there...I work in pediatrics and she asked if we had kids, I said no. Of course, the next question...when are you planning on having kids? I said, we're not. She then has the nerve to say, "Then why the heck are you working in peds?" Like I had no business there if I wasn't planning on having any children?!?!?

It really gets on my nerve, you know? Like I have a responsibility to have children because I work with children....like it's preparing me for parenting! Anyways, I was really upset about that comment and wanted to share....it's been awhile since I've been here....hope all is well with you all!


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## Hixski

ChisJo said:


> So - I was work the other day and got the rudest comment by one of the women that work there...I work in pediatrics and she asked if we had kids, I said no. Of course, the next question...when are you planning on having kids? I said, we're not. She then has the nerve to say, "Then why the heck are you working in peds?" Like I had no business there if I wasn't planning on having any children?!?!?
> 
> It really gets on my nerve, you know? Like I have a responsibility to have children because I work with children....like it's preparing me for parenting! Anyways, I was really upset about that comment and wanted to share....it's been awhile since I've been here....hope all is well with you all!



I hoped you told her that was the dumbest thing you ever heard!!! 

I got to a point where if someone said something like that I just asked them what business it was of theirs what we do. It is rather funny watching someone stutter around trying to backpedal on that one. More than one said the now infamous line "but you would be such good parents". I only did it a few times but it felt great.

We don't really get anyone saying much these days. I guess we are so old and pathetic they just feel sorry for us not having children.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> But when you get a price like 899.00PP- it does not matter if you drink! You can eat all day long, as much as you want, and that would make up for the drinks- but you can drink anything- they have sodas, virgin drinks, etc-
> 
> Our resort had a free standing coffee bar- I would get the best cappuccino every day after I would leave the beach, on the way back to the room. She would foam up the milk by hand- no hitting the button in the coffee shop!
> 
> You can also get cappuccinos, lattes, espresso, coffee from their cappuccino machine in the buffet all day long- and the machines make them GREAT too! The foam was always perfect every time!
> 
> You have to figure- when you go to Starbucks you pay almost 4 bucks per coffee there!



Sold! I'm loving the apple site btw. How long was your sister in Mexico? It looks like we'll get 9 days for about 1K each. I could always shorten it if we have to, but.....NAH!


----------



## maddhatir

plgrn said:


> Sold! I'm loving the apple site btw. How long was your sister in Mexico? It looks like we'll get 9 days for about 1K each. I could always shorten it if we have to, but.....NAH!



She was there for 7 days-  be careful of the air- make sure you choose "non-stop"


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## zima-cheryl

plgrn said:


> That is freaking awesome! Our wedding anniversary happens to be during hurricane season, so I'm thinking of booking something then in hopes that it will be cheaper. DH and I don't drink, so I'd really like to find an all-inclusive that's everything BUT drinks (if there is such a thing  ). I don't mind being around drinking, but would feel like I'm paying for something I won't be using. Make sense? Hmmm...Maybe I could airmail our share of booze to you for a nominal fee.



I've got to second what Maddhatir said...even if you don't drink it is so worth it.  We are going to the Omni in Cancun in about 2 weeks and going all inclusive.  It really does include everything - from the early breakfast buffett right through until 3 or 4am at the pizza/burger stand.  For those few hours when none of the restaurants are open, we can still get room service.  
During the busy hours of the day they have many options.  We can do pool side lunch service, casual, fancy or even room service - all included!  

I realize each resort will be a little bit different, but in general, the food alone makes it worth while.


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> She was there for 7 days-  be careful of the air- make sure you choose "non-stop"



If you can't get non-stop (depends on the airport you leave from) make sure you have a nice long layover where ever you clear customs coming home.  When we come back we come through Orlando and have a 3 1/2 hour lay over.  I would rather clear customs & have time to kill (can you say Disney store!) than be rushing to clear customs & get to my next flight (been there... done that   )

And for the record, how much does that stink?!?  To be that close & not able to get to WDW?


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## Mozart

We've done an all-inclusive before and thought it was just okay.  I think that if you're like us, and you aren't big sun-worshipers you may not find all-inclusives to be all that great.  I know some people love them, but we really do prefer cruising when we're thinking along those lines.  Granted, drinks aren't included and neither are shore excursions, but it's one heck of a way to get away and enjoy a few carefree days.

There was a trip report a while back on the cruise line board about a group of people who committed to spending as little money as possible on a cruise.  On DCL, you can bring your own alcohol on board and drink out of your own personal stash and they did it that way.  When it was all said and done, they paid for the cruise, parking fees at the terminal, $100 in tips, and splurged for a $20 meal at the upscale restaurant on board.

In case you haven't noticed...I highly recommend cruises when you're looking for something like that.  Great way to get away, relax, see a few new places, and if you plan for it, you really don't spend much money on board at all.

Besides, Castaway Cay is about the most beautiful beach you'll ever find.


----------



## Hixski

Mozart said:


> We've done an all-inclusive before and thought it was just okay.  I think that if you're like us, and you aren't big sun-worshipers you may not find all-inclusives to be all that great.  I know some people love them, but we really do prefer cruising when we're thinking along those lines.  Granted, drinks aren't included and neither are shore excursions, but it's one heck of a way to get away and enjoy a few carefree days.
> 
> There was a trip report a while back on the cruise line board about a group of people who committed to spending as little money as possible on a cruise.  On DCL, you can bring your own alcohol on board and drink out of your own personal stash and they did it that way.  When it was all said and done, they paid for the cruise, parking fees at the terminal, $100 in tips, and splurged for a $20 meal at the upscale restaurant on board.
> 
> In case you haven't noticed...I highly recommend cruises when you're looking for something like that.  Great way to get away, relax, see a few new places, and if you plan for it, you really don't spend much money on board at all.
> 
> *Besides, Castaway Cay is about the most beautiful beach you'll ever find*



I can vouch for that!!!!






DH parked in the water at Serenity Bay on CC. It doesn't get more relaxing than this.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

I so want to go on the DCL but DH won't go for it.  

Stupid (can I say irrational) fears he has.


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## plgrn

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> I so want to go on the DCL but DH won't go for it.
> 
> Stupid (can I say irrational) fears he has.




Awww. DH liked everything about our cruise except the fact that we were on a boat!  That's why I think all inclusive will be perfect for us. A cruise without a ship!

Hixski, your DH could be the poster child for Serenity Bay. I don't think he could possibly be more relaxed.


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## maddhatir

Mozart said:


> We've done an all-inclusive before and thought it was just okay.  I think that if you're like us, and you aren't big sun-worshipers you may not find all-inclusives to be all that great.  I know some people love them, but we really do prefer cruising when we're thinking along those lines.  Granted, drinks aren't included and neither are shore excursions, but it's one heck of a way to get away and enjoy a few carefree days.



I like both- DH likes the all-inclusives. DH is not a sun worshipper though- however- he is a "relaxer" When we do the all-inclusives- we find our "hut" and are there on the beach the whole day- me, I lay in the sun for a while and then cool off under our hut. DH- he is in the shade the whole time- except for when he is snorkeling. Of course, we take a break from the beach for our drinks and to eat!

We like to do...nothing. so the all-inclusives are perfect for us.


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## ForTheLoveofDisney

plgrn said:


> Awww. DH liked everything about our cruise except the fact that we were on a boat!  That's why I think all inclusive will be perfect for us. A cruise without a ship!


 Exactly!  I think my DH would like everything about it except for the boat part.


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## TXTurtles

Sigh.  Our 6-month-old neighbor is reminding us why we don't want children.  Loudly.  Through cinder block walls.  Though I suspect it's actually the (closed in both apartments, extra-soundproof) windows letting the noise through.  Either way she's got a loud, persistent, and FREQUENT cry.   And it's not something I can complain to her parents about - it's not like they're any happier with it.  I may hate some of the side effects of BC but they sure beat the alternatives.

Ok, back to the cruise chatter which is FAR nicer than what I'm hearing right now.


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## maddhatir

TXTurtles said:


> Sigh.  Our 6-month-old neighbor is reminding us why we don't want children.  Loudly.  Through cinder block walls.  Though I suspect it's actually the (closed in both apartments, extra-soundproof) windows letting the noise through.  Either way she's got a loud, persistent, and FREQUENT cry.   And it's not something I can complain to her parents about - it's not like they're any happier with it.  I may hate some of the side effects of BC but they sure beat the alternatives.
> 
> Ok, back to the cruise chatter which is FAR nicer than what I'm hearing right now.



I do feel bad for little babies that cry- it is an annoying sound- but like you said, I am sure the parent would love it to stop too! 

OMG- at our resort- there were a lot of little ones there. I was very surprised. There were people who were in groups, like a bunch of friends/family got together (with the kiddies) and took a vacation! We would cross our fingers every day that we would not be near one of those families in the beach- the last day, our luck ran out with the dad and his kid (the story I mentioned a few pages back).

 One day- we happened to sit right next to the volleyball net. I said, wait, what if we get hit in the head with the ball?- I said- oh, who cares, I would rather be wailed in the head with a volley ball than hear a whining kid near me. So we stayed.

Believe it or not- they were playing volleyball all day- and the players were much quieter than the dad and his kid were that one day! ........and no, I was not hit once!


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## Liisa

Just jumping in real quick (sanity break from what is turning into a bad weekend) - but I'll tell you about that in a second.  DH also won't go on DCL.  He theory - we don't like being around alot of kids, so why would we go on a cruise line that is particulary attractive to families...?  I see his point.  He'd like to do a cruise at some point.  But he's looking more at Celebrity Cruises or Norwegian Cruises.

All this Mexico talk has me REALLY looking forward to my May trip.  It will be our first time at an all inclusive.  And as an added bonus - it is Adults ONLY!     We also booked our vacation with Apple - using a travel agent that has really  been awesome.  She specializes in Mexico / Carribbean and she has a chat board that she runs.  So she has to be good or people would be sure to post in on the chat group!   

Now for my weekend, Kayla the rescue arrived on Friday.  She is totally adorable, bonded really well with me and I really, really like her.  But she isn't at all getting along with my two.  We've had a handful of minor squabbles, that we expected.  But last night we had a major fight (that DH got into while trying to break it up and ended up with a wound on his arm).  The dogs were all fine after, but we were really shaken up.  Ever since that, we've kept them apart.  DH slept in our room with our two, and I slept in the spare room with Kayla.  This morning we took the three for a walk - no problems.  Then DH left to run some errands making me promise not to do anything stupid while he was gone.  C'mon, that's my middle name!!!     So, Kayla was outside, my two were inside.  Mine wanted to go out and Kayla wanted to come in, I figured I could manage that.  Not so much.  Kayla went for my Pari while I was opening the door and my leg blocked her (OUCH!).  We tried, but it isn't working.  We are driving her to New York this afternoon to stay at a foster home until they can get her back to Los Angeles.  I feel so bad for her.  But I can't be breaking up major fights every day.  I wish it had worked for Kayla's sake... and the dogs may have eventually sorted it all out.  But DH and I are a wreck right now.  That is my long story.  I think the rescue people are a little disappointed in us... they deal with tough dogs all the time so this is just life.  But we really don't have the stomach for this.  I feel terrible about it.    

Ok... happy thoughts... back to Mexico...


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## WDWguru

Liisa said:


> DH also won't go on DCL.  He theory - we don't like being around alot of kids, so why would we go on a cruise line that is particulary attractive to families...?  I see his point.  He'd like to do a cruise at some point.  But he's looking more at Celebrity Cruises or Norwegian Cruises.



First, sorry to hear that poor Kayla didn't work out for you. At least you gave her a chance, and she'll be in good hands until she can find her forever home.

Regarding DCL... we've always taken Holland America which caters to an older crowd, but even so when you're going on a cruise in the summer (even to a pricy destination like Alaska) there is no guarantee of no annoying kids on the boat. We've had really good luck on HAL, so I'd recommend that if you can't talk him into DCL. You can also do the usual things like avoid school breaks and popular (cheap) destinations and shorter cruises.

That said, we took our two nephews and my mother in law on DCL and we were surprised how much we liked it! Unlike other cruise lines, they have DESIGNATED areas for kids, adults and families and they enforce it! Our nephews LOVED the kids clubs and the three of us were in the adult areas of the ship most of the time. It was great! The only time we had to deal with the kids on the ship were at dinner (you could request a table for two and/or eat a Palo every night, where you must be 18 to dine - we did that one night) and at Castaway Cay (where we could've put the kids in all-day programs and done the adult beach but didn't). I would take DCL in a second over a lower or mid-level cruise line that doesn't have designated segregated areas. Given the choice between HAL and DCL for just the two of us, I'd take HAL and avoid school breaks or the Caribbean itineraries as it's a more luxurious experience overall.


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## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> We are driving her to New York this afternoon to stay at a foster home until they can get her back to Los Angeles.  ...



 Oh No! You do not think they would have grown "to love each other" eventually?  

I think the rescue people should really stress that people with no other dogs should adopt Kayla. This way- there will be no wait and see if they become friends. Maybe you should suggest that to them  

I am sorry it did not work out. Poor puppy.


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## Mozart

We almost adopted an Italian Greyhound yesterday, but decided not to at the last minute yesterday because we were afraid of this exact thing happening.  He's probably getting a little too territorial in his old age to accept a new dog.  I felt really bad knowing that girl would not be going to a new home immediately, but we're just not sure it would be a good situation for her.


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## Liisa

Hi all,

Madd, I think that eventually they would have gotten over it.  But it would have taken a long time and it seemed to be getting worse not better as the weekend progressed.  Plus, we have some injuries from trying to break up the fights.  I was heartbroken when we finally made the call that we couldn't do it.  We just got back and I was a mess much of the way home.  

Rescue definitely thought they would sort it out and that we were overreacting.  But, to be fair to us, they weren't here and the fights were very intense - did I mention we have injuries to prove it?  I also did tell rescue that I thought she would do great in a home by herself.  They swear she hasn't had issues with any other dogs.  I think the problem was that she was getting very comfortable here, liked it, and saw the other two as a bit of competition.  In between the fights, we could tell she was happy.  Playing around with a toy, wagging her tail, coming inside for pets.  

I know we made the right choice for our family, but we feel so guilty that we couldn't work it out.  Poor thing...


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## Liisa

Mozart said:


> We almost adopted an Italian Greyhound yesterday, but decided not to at the last minute yesterday because we were afraid of this exact thing happening.  He's probably getting a little too territorial in his old age to accept a new dog.  I felt really bad knowing that girl would not be going to a new home immediately, but we're just not sure it would be a good situation for her.



Sometimes the hard decisions, the ones that are sad to make are the right ones.  You know your dog best, so you were probably right.  But I sympathize with you.

And by the way, I like the new Johnny Depp pictures!  Madd, I needed that as a pick me up.


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## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> And by the way, I like the new Johnny Depp pictures!  Madd, I needed that as a pick me up.



YES! He DOES have that effect on us girls!


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## arielchickenofthesea

WOW! I was watching this thread a couple of years ago and had not been following it lately. My, how it has grown!

DH and I are married with no children by choice.  I have always known I never wanted children. I am 54 now and do not regret for a moment my decision to not procreate. We married late in life, I was 46 at the time.
When I was in high school I used to listen to all my friends talk about how they wanted to marry and have children. I never felt the burning urge for either. I went to college, worked for many years and supported myself and my furry friends, (kittys) and still never felt the burning urge to marry or have kids. I lived with two different men, with whom I NEVER would have had children, even if I had wanted them. 

It was not until I met my now DH, that I felt I had met someone that I truly felt I could live the rest of my life with. And we did not marry until after being together 5 years. We went to the DMV and paid ten bucks and got our license. That was the extent of our *wedding*.  We did it primarily for the financial protection it offers. Love has nothing to do with a license! Without the legal part of the union, there is no protection for your assets and if something should happen to either of us, we did not want to have to fight the families. His family in particular can be very nasty about things.

We are independently wealthy and can go where ever we want when we want to. We never got the "When are you having kids?" question, because I was already in my 40's when we met, but we do get, "You are going to Disney again?" LOL! They just do not understand our love for all things Disney. We could go anywhere in the world we want to, but we still choose Disney for our vacations. We will go other places as well at some point, but when we want to go on vacation, we usually look at eachother and we do not have to say anything. We both know we want to go to Disney again. 

We have our *children*, our 3 beautiful furbabies (kittys) and two feathered ones. They are our life. We had 4 cats and lost our beautiful 11 year old boy, Orion to cancer last year. DH ALWAYS called him our *son* from the moment we got him as a tiny little sickly boy. It devastated us to lose him. He was our child in every way. It has left a huge hole in our hearts. 

We have a bumper sticker on our car that says, "Yes, I love my cat as much as you love your child" It is true. I have always been an animal person. My heart has so much love for our furry friends, that after a 20 year career in radio broadcasting, I went back to school at 47 yrs young to study Veterinary Science and got my degree as a Veterinary Technician. I have not worked in the field because of a disability I got while in my internship.  I lifted a very large dog onto a treatment table and HEARD something make a funny sound in my back. OWIE!!!!!! Now 5 yrs later, I cannot lift things, nor can I walk for long distances. I messed up my back pretty bad and will need surgery.

My husband is disabled as well and neither of us work, so we have lots of free time to enjoy the world. We love going to the Parks, both WDW and DL and are happiest when we are there. We make about 3 trips a year to DL and at least one to WDW. We are planning to move to the Orlando area OR the Anaheim area to work PT at a Disney Park in some capacity. 
Our lives would have been very different with kids and I am happy just the way we are! (well, when we move to Florida or So Cal to work for Disney, I will have my dream come true! 
I am so happy to see this thread is still alive and kicking. I have not had a chance to read through the whole thing, but I will catch up to where I left off back in August 2007 somewhere... 
Susan


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## plgrn

arielchickenofthesea said:


> We are independently wealthy and can go where ever we want when we want to.
> Susan



Teach Meeee


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## PhotobearSam

Hey guys...Come over here...

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1202587&page=61

We are posting pics of our Child-free families...Including furbabies...

Come join us.


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## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Hey guys...Come over here...
> 
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1202587&page=61
> 
> We are posting pics of our Child-free families...Including furbabies...
> 
> Come join us.



I never knew that thread existed!


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## arielchickenofthesea

plgrn said:


> Teach Meeee



Investments, my dear! That is the only way to do it and getting older while watching those investments grow!


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## maddhatir

Hi peoples-

Had to go to the Gyn today for my annual exam and found out I have an ovarian cyst- blah blah- nothing serious, anyway....

Not sure if you all get this at your Gyns office, but there are always new moms there, pregnant women, yes- I know it is also an OB office  anywho- today a mom walks in with her daughter maybe 9 and in comes her DH holding their one year old- I know b/c the 9 year told the woman that worked there.....

It's all quiet and the dad is holding the baby- well, the baby now is bored and wants to walk around....near me I am the only other one besides them in the waiting room. 

I am "pretending" to watch the TV and out of the corner of my eye, I see him....eeeek...... coming closer! Now is the time in your head you are hopping he will ignore you *go away kid*, but NOOOoooooo- he looks at me, bhaaaa  I can't ignore the kid.  

*great what do I say, hello? the kid is one-  like he cares...hello, that is SO stupid* *smile? no that is not enough, he will want more than a smile* *great he might want baby talk, ugh! I am NOT playing with this kid* *please call my name, please call my name* 

In the meantime- the dad and the sister are just looking at him like, oooo, you are so cute staring at that lady *PLEASE come and get this kid!* *call my NAAAAAME!* 

(pretty bad that I would rather be  in stirrups than make eye contact with a kid) 

Finally- I put my big smile on... "hey, and how are _YOU_?" was my opening line. He was happy with it- seemed impressed by gift for gab *oh GOD- he is slobbering and walking near my NEW Sailor Jerry handbag- step away from the bag kid...OMG It is dripping from his little mouth someone please catch it!* 

*ugh- thank goodness- he is going back to dad*

"Maddhatir, the doctor will see you now" *great- wehre were YOU when I needed you?*


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

plgrn said:


> Teach Meeee



Meeeee Toooooo!!!!  


Madd, I am cracking up!!  Mostly because I have BEEN there before!!  And I was picturing myself in that situation. I've always said I hate going to the Gyn because of the _other_ people in the waiting room not because of the gyn himself.  And it _could be_ just because I'm on edge but I swear I've always sat near someone who wants to strike up a conversation!  
Please do not talk to me!!!  Do I LOOK like someone who wants to talk?  With you?  Gaaahhh!

Speaking of which  I need to find one down here.  I haven't been in like a year and a half.  Sorry for the TMI to all our guy peeps on the MCNtHK thread.


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Hi peoples-
> 
> Had to go to the Gyn today for my annual exam and found out I have an ovarian cyst- blah blah- nothing serious, anyway....
> 
> Not sure if you all get this at your Gyns office, but there are always new moms there, pregnant women, yes- I know it is also an OB office  anywho- today a mom walks in with her daughter maybe 9 and in comes her DH holding their one year old- I know b/c the 9 year told the woman that worked there.....
> 
> It's all quiet and the dad is holding the baby- well, the baby now is bored and wants to walk around....near me I am the only other one besides them in the waiting room.
> 
> I am "pretending" to watch the TV and out of the corner of my eye, I see him....eeeek...... coming closer! Now is the time in your head you are hopping he will ignore you *go away kid*, but NOOOoooooo- he looks at me, bhaaaa  I can't ignore the kid.
> 
> *great what do I say, hello? the kid is one-  like he cares...hello, that is SO stupid* *smile? no that is not enough, he will want more than a smile* *great he might want baby talk, ugh! I am NOT playing with this kid* *please call my name, please call my name*
> 
> In the meantime- the dad and the sister are just looking at him like, oooo, you are so cute staring at that lady *PLEASE come and get this kid!* *call my NAAAAAME!*
> 
> (pretty bad that I would rather be  in stirrups than make eye contact with a kid)
> 
> Finally- I put my big smile on... "hey, and how are _YOU_?" was my opening line. He was happy with it- seemed impressed by gift for gab *oh GOD- he is slobbering and walking near my NEW Sailor Jerry handbag- step away from the bag kid...OMG It is dripping from his little mouth someone please catch it!*
> 
> *ugh- thank goodness- he is going back to dad*
> 
> "Maddhatir, the doctor will see you now" *great- wehre were YOU when I needed you?*




Madd, I have soooo been there. I never know what to say when a little kid approaches me like that! Even though I think of stranger's kids as barely a step above vermin, I can't let the parents see that on my face!  And then just what DO you say in acknowledgment?? I usually just go "hi there" or "aren't you cute?" with a s***eating grin on my face wishing I didn't have to say or do either.


----------



## Hixski

Madd: You are cracking me up with the blow by blow replay!! 

Kids ALWAYS gravitate to DH and I. The little girls always flirt with him. I tell him it is because of his bad boy looks. Those girls are trying to get their bad boy fix in early!!


----------



## arielchickenofthesea

Hixski said:


> Madd: You are cracking me up with the blow by blow replay!!
> 
> Kids ALWAYS gravitate to DH and I. The little girls always flirt with him. I tell him it is because of his bad boy looks. Those girls are trying to get their bad boy fix in early!!




That is funny! Kids always glom onto my DH as well. He has a way with kids and animals. He usually can entertain a kid if the baby is on someone's shoulder when we are in line and he starts making faces at the baby and the baby smiles and laughs. DH gets a kick out of it, but does NOT want our own to do it with. Living vicariously through other people's kids is always better, Cheaper too!  They get all the bills and we can have a little fun with the kidlets and not have to take them home!
Susan


----------



## arielchickenofthesea

Another thought I had while I was sitting here reading this great thread, was that DH and I are going to WDW in May. We will be going on the Platinum plan that is all inclusive of recreation, massages, fireworks cruises, preferred seating for fireworks and Illuminations, Fantasmic special seating, etc..etc.. Check out the plan on the Disney website. You will be amazed at what is included. 

We will be staying at the Polynesian Concierge for 11 days and then transfer over to the Yacht Club for 10 days. WOO HOO!!!!!! What a trip this is gonna be. Romance is in the air! Yes, indeedy!!!! WOO HOO! 

We could NEVER afford that type of trip with kids and believe me going to WDW with DH is like going with a big kid! LOL! Of course I turn into a squealy little girl at WDW or DL as well so we ARE actually our own kids! LOLOLOL!!!!!  

It is nice to be pampered and not have to worry about what to do with *the kids*. Our furry kids will be nice and safe at the Kennel with people who love them and know them well, because we are able to take many trips to DL and WDW.  

We do the 3 week Platinum WDW trip once a year. We spend other vacayshes at DL, a week at a time. I like the freedom to tour the Parks as we want and have romantic sunsets in World Showcase or on the balcony of the 12th floor of the Coontemporary. It is so cozy to sit and hold hands and watch the fireworks from there too. This year at the Poly and the Yacht, we will have a different experience.  Next year, I think I might want to try the Animal Kingdom Lodge and enjoy the Sunrise and Sunset Safaris and maybe check out Grand Floridian. We try to stay at a different place every trip to see what the differences are and how we like them. So far, the Contemporary is our very favorite because of the great view iof the MK from up high. I am so looking forward to Stormalong Bay this next trip.

I am so happy I never had kids and I can say that with conviction. I decided VERY young to never have them and at 54, I still am very content and happy. My husband is 44 and is very happy with our romantic relationship. We have quiet mornings just watching TV in bed and go to lunch together and do pick up for dinner quite often. 

The only thing missing is living closer to the magic! And that is being worked on. The house is for sale, half of our *stuff* is packed and ready for a garage sale and we are looking at places when we go to WDW in May. 

It may be a while before we can buy a home in Florida til our house sells. We want to move there ahead and rent while our house is on the market and then we can get an idea if we REALLY want to move there or back to California.  This time the move would be to So Cal. We are Northern Californians, born and raised, living in Denver now. I miss the ocean so much.
And if Florida was not the right spot for us, maybe So Cal wold be. We really wan to work at a Disney Park, since we are retired and that would be fun and keep us out with lots of people. So we really have to check it out.



When I was in my 20's back in the 1970's, most people did not give it a thought. They just went ahead got married and had kids. Every other girl in my high school group of aboout 10 gals, had kids. I am the only one who did not.  I was into being a liberated woman before it was fashionable and the ERA got apssed! LOL!

I keep in touch with my very best friend from high school from 36 years ago! WOW!!!  She married very young out of high school, had the kids and now she in some ways wished she had waited a bit longer to marry and done some things for herself. She is having a midlife crisis about it. She tells me how lucky I was to live my life the way I did. Making my own decisions and doing what I wanted and not marrying til 46 ys old.

She tells me she does not know herself very well other than as *Mom* and *Grandma*. She tells me she needs to find out who SHE is inside. She never had the chance to seek that out all those years of raising kids and living the married with children life. 

I understand that need to know yourself. It is the way I have lived my whole life, not through the eyes of others and the labels they give me, ie; friend, mother (of furry children)  , child, sister...etc, but who I am as me, Susan! 

She and her hubby spend some vacations with us and we met at WDW in 2006. We had so much fun, the 4 of us and I could tell she was having the time of her life! She was FREE!!!!! She has a son with two kids that had moved back in with them (they had NO where else to go) and my friend could not let them live in the street. He was not contributing to the household, did not work and put them so far into debt because they had to work more hours to support the son and the two kids, My friend and her DH paid for ALL the food, medical expenses, clothing, education expenses, toys and other expenses that a family of five can rack up! She just wants her life back. Getting away to visit us here and to WDW and DL were fun trips for her, but more than that they got her away from all those pressing comittments. She felt free and relaxed to get away from it.

SO, it is NOT always true that your kids will take care of you. They may come back and leech off of the parents if they are allowed to. She has now laid the law down, the grandkids have gone to their maternal grandmother since their mom is in Iraq and does not want the kids anyway, (never did)  and my friend's son has moved out at my friend and her husband's insistence. 

The son and daughter in law are divorced. That is why he moved in with my friend and the daughter never really wanted the kids anyway. She is a career military woman. 

Here is a great example of a woman who should NEVER have had kids in the first place. She does not want to raise them and she pays nothing for their support. She does not even want to see them. I met the whole family on one of our Disneyland trips. The daughter in law came along with the rest of the family and was very cold to the kids, but the son INSISTED she see them. Sad situation, and kids are involved. 

My friends are now trying to rebuild their credit so they can move far away from the kids. She does not want a repeat performance. They actually want to move down to Florida to be near WDW as well and to be near us when we move there. The four of us have so much fun together sans kids and it is a good, fun relationship. We enjoy each other's company and have enough fun without children getting involved. She can tell me stories about the kids when she was raising them and I listen, and I tell her about my life without kids and we enjoy hearing each other's life experiences since they took us down two very divergent roads. 

We had lost touch over the years and it was not until 2006 that we found one another again via the internet and for our first meeting we met at WDW. It was incredible! NO kids, just 4 adults being big kids together!

There are as many stories about kids and not having kids as there are people and each one is unique. Each person has to make the best decision for their own lives. No one should press their opinions on anyone else. Whether it is disguised as friendly chatter or direct in your face comments, neither are appreciated by anyone. For those who have kids and love them, more power to you! For those who do not and know they don't want them, more power to you too! I made the decision very young and have NEVER once regretted it. I never once *changed my mind* as I got older, as so many told me I would. Follow your hearts and your own inner voices and you will not be steered wrong. 
I LOVE this thread! 

Susan


----------



## WDWguru

They CLOSED the only other long standing childfree thread on the DIS tonight! The "cheerfully childfree" thread on the community board had been going since August of 2006. We'd had a few interlopers here and there, but we've always come out of it clean. Somebody came in to stir the pot a few days ago and it was getting back on track as usual, then one of the mods just CLOSED it! NO FAIR! It wasn't even one of the worst arguments we'd had on the thread! 

I actually sent a message (via the report button on the last post) begging them to reopen it as it was one of only TWO threads on the DIS for us but I doubt it will do much good. If they won't do it, I'll wait a few days and start a new one. But looking at half the crap on the community board, I think it's completely bogus that they closed it.


----------



## Hixski

WDWguru said:


> They CLOSED the only other long standing childfree thread on the DIS tonight! The "cheerfully childfree" thread on the community board had been going since August of 2006. We'd had a few interlopers here and there, but we've always come out of it clean. Somebody came in to stir the pot a few days ago and it was getting back on track as usual, then one of the mods just CLOSED it! NO FAIR! It wasn't even one of the worst arguments we'd had on the thread!
> 
> I actually sent a message (via the report button on the last post) begging them to reopen it as it was one of only TWO threads on the DIS for us but I doubt it will do much good. If they won't do it, I'll wait a few days and start a new one. But looking at half the crap on the community board, I think it's completely bogus that they closed it.



We are probably better off over here. The CB is loaded with people who just like to  

If you start a new one make sure it has a nice respectful title. No need to get anyone riled up right off the bat. If anyone comes here to stir things up we just need to report them. If we get snarky back this one will just get closed too.


----------



## WDWguru

I know you're right, Hixski. It just got to me that the thread has lasted so long and through so much worse, yet some mod who probably doesn't know a thing about it and hasn't read more than the last few pages would just swoop in and close it. :: sigh ::


----------



## Hixski

WDWguru said:


> I know you're right, Hixski. It just got to me that the thread has lasted so long and through so much worse, yet some mod who probably doesn't know a thing about it and hasn't read more than the last few pages would just swoop in and close it. :: sigh ::



I would suspect that "our" side was getting reported. Nothing is going to get a thread closed faster than that I think.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Just checking to let you guys know I saw that the other thread got closed.  I also know there's some gloating going on in the other realm.  I don't belong here as I am unmarried, and do not want to intrude or pretend that I understand the child-free thing when a couple is involved.  If someone starts another thread with a boring name, please PM to let me know. 

Take care.


----------



## maddhatir

Aunt Michelle said:


> Just checking to let you guys know I saw that the other thread got closed.  I also know there's some gloating going on in the other realm.  I don't belong here as I am unmarried, and do not want to intrude or pretend that I understand the child-free thing when a couple is involved.  If someone starts another thread with a boring name, please PM to let me know.
> 
> Take care.



You can still stay! We won't be bullies and chase you away! 

You are still child free- so that counts for something. 

Don't go. 

Now since we do talk about kids over here and I can stay ON topic- I have always said- rude people BREED rude children b/c the poor kids only know what their parents teach them.  Imagine being a bully as an adult 

I have to go to the docs today for my back- still acting up- 2 herniated discs- ugh- happened years ago from pounding waves on our friends speedboat- 

When you are young- what do you care? A big boat goes by- he would cut into the wave and we would be airborn Being out in the ocean on one of those things at full throttle (his only speed!) is no picnic either- non stop pounding!!  

We were so dumb!   

Talk to you all later when I get back....and you all better still be here.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Can we ALL make a promise that is ANYONE stops by and criticizes us....WE WILL NOT RESPOND TO THEIR POT STIRRING!!! 


If we just ignore everyone, we can't get into trouble. And we should report anyone who makes US feel attacked.


Why is it that all other threads get a warning but we got closed?

NOT FAIR...we were playing by the rules, we did not attack anyone personally, we just asked pot stirrers to leave us alone, but I guess you can ask disturbers to leave us alone so we should now VOW to just ignore them.


Is EVERYBODY WITH ME???

Repeat after me...

If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be puled into a fight.
I Swear!!!


Copy and paste this Vow into your response if you can promise to keep it.

Mods, I am not trying to disturb the peace but protect it....


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Aunt Michelle said:


> Just checking to let you guys know I saw that the other thread got closed.  I also know there's some gloating going on in the other realm.  I don't belong here as I am unmarried, and do not want to intrude or pretend that I understand the child-free thing when a couple is involved.  If someone starts another thread with a boring name, please PM to let me know.
> 
> Take care.


Aunt Michelle, please stick around.  We enjoy having you.



maddhatir said:


> You can still stay! We won't be bullies and chase you away!
> 
> You are still child free- so that counts for something.
> 
> Don't go.
> 
> Now since we do talk about kids over here and I can stay ON topic- I have always said- rude people BREED rude children b/c the poor kids only know what their parents teach them.  Imagine being a bully as an adult
> 
> I have to go to the docs today for my back- still acting up- 2 herniated discs- ugh- happened years ago from pounding waves on our friends speedboat-
> 
> When you are young- what do you care? A big boat goes by- he would cut into the wave and we would be airborn Being out in the ocean on one of those things at full throttle (his only speed!) is no picnic either- non stop pounding!!
> 
> We were so dumb!
> 
> Talk to you all later when I get back....and you all better still be here.


  Good luck, Madd.  My dad is having surgery today for a herniated disc.  I really wanted him to get a second opinion but I guess he's in so much pain he's going through w/ the surgery.



PhotobearSam said:


> Repeat after me...
> 
> If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be puled into a fight.
> I Swear!!!
> 
> 
> Copy and paste this Vow into your response if you can promise to keep it.


If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be puled into a fight.
I Swear!!!  

I hate fighting, it's so mean.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be puled into a fight.
I Swear!!!

I can't believe they closed the other thread...there was much less nastiness going on in it than I see on many other threads....

back semi on topic...for those with furbabies...how easy is it to board a cat who is 6 and never been boarded before. DH and I are supposed to go to Georgia to visit his parents this summer and will need to board our cat for the first time. We have no one who could come watch him...previously we lived in our hometown and when we went on vacation, my mother would come over everyday and take care of him...But we moved to the DFW metroplex area(about an hour and half away) and our closests friends live 30 minutes away...
so is it easy or do we just throw in the towel on ever travelling again? lol


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Shyvioletisme said:


> back semi on topic...for those with furbabies...how easy is it to board a cat who is 6 and never been boarded before. DH and I are supposed to go to Georgia to visit his parents this summer and will need to board our cat for the first time. We have no one who could come watch him...previously we lived in our hometown and when we went on vacation, my mother would come over everyday and take care of him...But we moved to the DFW metroplex area(about an hour and half away) and our closests friends live 30 minutes away...
> so is it easy or do we just throw in the towel on ever travelling again? lol


 We had to board our cat for the first time in 2006.  We were in the process of moving and we had contractors in and out of the house and then people viewing the house.  We didn't want anything to happen to her so we chose to board her.  I think she was around 6 at the time as well.  Since then we've boarded her 2 other times.  She seems to do well.  All of the places we've taken her have the cat area in a seperate QUIET place (kind of like a little nursery) and the kitties are in Kitty condos.  Like 3 tiered little condos that are carpeted.  I trusted the places where I took her and like I said, she did very well. Not traumatized at all.  We took her favorite little toys, blanket and even her own food.  I wouldn't hesitate to have her boarded again and will when we need to travel.

Hope this helps.


----------



## Hixski

PhotobearSam said:


> Repeat after me...
> 
> *If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
> I Swear!!!*
> 
> 
> Copy and paste this Vow into your response if you can promise to keep it.
> 
> Mods, I am not trying to disturb the peace but protect it....



I can!!! Although I am extremely good at being slightly snarky. You know where someone wonders if you were just snarky to them but can't quite pick anything out??? Comes with age and wisdom........see that is just a sneaky snarky way of saying I am an old lady!!! 

At least I am still young at heart!


----------



## Fitswimmer

Aunt Michelle said:


> Just checking to let you guys know I saw that the other thread got closed.  I also know there's some gloating going on in the other realm.  I don't belong here as I am unmarried, and do not want to intrude or pretend that I understand the child-free thing when a couple is involved.  If someone starts another thread with a boring name, please PM to let me know.
> 
> Take care.



me too.  I'm not married either, which is why I never posted over here, and I'm going to miss the other one.


----------



## Hixski

Fitswimmer said:


> me too.  I'm not married either, which is why I never posted over here, and I'm going to miss the other one.



You may not be married but you are childfree. You are all welcome here too! We don't discriminate over here. We won't ask you when you are getting married so you can finally have some children.


----------



## Mozart

Hixski said:


> You may not be married but you are childfree. You are all welcome here too! We don't discriminate over here. We won't ask you when you are getting married so you can finally have some children.



When are you getting married so you can have children?

(Watch Mozart being a smartmouth.  Watch Mozart run for safety...)


----------



## plgrn

Aunt Michelle said:


> JI don't belong here as I am unmarried, and do not want to intrude or pretend that I understand the child-free thing when a couple is involved.





Fitswimmer said:


> me too.  I'm not married either, which is why I never posted over here, and I'm going to miss the other one.




Stay stay stay! I don't belong here either since I'm a fencesitter, but the gals (and don't we have like 1 guy lurking?) are nice enough to let me stay. It's for my sanity. The CB is scary and too controversial. Hang out with us and let's talk about travel, home projects, furbabies, and *gasp* IDEAS


----------



## plgrn

PhotobearSam said:


> If we just ignore everyone, we can't get into trouble.



Agreed. Does the Dis have an "ignore user" type function like other boards? If I can't even read the troll posts it will remove all temptation.


----------



## LisaZee

Hi guys!

I am so glad to find ya'll.  I was SO bummed our other thread got closed.  I have never been part of a closed thread before.  I feel so "tainted".   

What is it I'm supposed to repeat?  Oh yeah...  

If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
I Swear!!!

I'm glad we still have this thread so we can stay together.  Wait, did I just crash it?    Can I come play in this sandbox?


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

LisaZee said:


> I'm glad we still have this thread so we can stay together.  Wait, did I just crash it?    Can I come play in this sandbox?


Well YEA!!


----------



## Suzibrat

*Can I come play over here in your sandbox? Or should you all avoid me like the plague?  *


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *Can I come play over here in your sandbox? Or should you all avoid me like the plague?  *



Anyone who likes Slipknot and wears a goth wedding dress, is cool in my book!


----------



## Fitswimmer

As long as I have a place where I can rant about my co-workers I'm happy.  

One woman in our group has a daughter who is involved in drama-the kid is probably pretty good.  She won an audition to some kids Broadway group before the holidays.  We get updates EVERY SINGLE DAY.....kill me now.....


----------



## PhotobearSam

Repeat after me...

If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
I Swear!!!


Copy and paste this Vow into your response if you can promise to keep it.


----------



## maddhatir

I wish Krissalee was around to change the title of this thread now that we have all merged! Who cares who is married and who is not 

And you know what irks me, the fact that the word _child-hater_ has been thrown around so much on the CF threads lately. 

I have -*a lot*- of friends on the DIS and (my **** friends too ) who are moms- I would say 99% of the people I talk to are moms! To me, it sucks that just b/c I (or any of us) am on the CF thread, that I am somehow branded as a child-hater!  

I admit- _I do not want children_, I do not hate them , but, I do not go out of my way to......interact with them just b/c they are...there. I have no reason to. I just do not find them as _interesting _as some people do  With that said- I have a lot of friends who have kids, I am nice to their kids, I talk to their kids- but that is b/c I know their parents. I am interacting with their parents, so I interact with the children. 

It is the same with the people I know on the Dis- if they talk about their kids, or show a pic- I will comment, b/c I know them. I would not be rude. If it is right there in my face- I will comment.  But, say, I see a poster who has a pic of their child in their siggy- I will not go out of my way to make a comment _about_ the pic on my own- b/c 99% of the time, if I see a random pic of a child- to me, it is......void. I do not see kids like parents do. 

If I see a random child (like at the Gyns office), to me, there is no reason to interact with the child. It is not IN me to do that all that coochy coo stuff. I would rather, watch the TV- _and BTW- I did find out something very interesting before the child came over to me......DID YOU KNOW.....that after you take a shower you have to moisturize w/in 3 minutes or else the water will dry up on your skin and there goes your window of opportunity?! _ OK- A-D-D break, back on track... 

If we go out somewhere and there is a child I also see.....void.....UNLESS the child is making a scene- it is then put in my face- and I take notice, THAT is why I comment on a child's behavior, b/c it is blatantly put ...right out there. 

So- if THAT makes me a child-hater in some people's eyes so be it- 

What I am trying to say is.....
_JUST B/C I DO NOT WANT TO PLAY PEEK-A-BOO WITH A CHILD DOES NOT MEAN THAT I AM GOING TO BE MEAN TO YOUR CHILD!_


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Repeat after me...
> 
> If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
> I Swear!!!
> 
> 
> Copy and paste this Vow into your response if you can promise to keep it.



OKAY! OKAY! I won't _THROW DOWN _with anyone!  

There, ya happy!? 

BUT! If you make me start singing "Koombya" I'M OUTTA HERE! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




.......If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
I Swear!!!


----------



## Suzibrat

PhotobearSam said:


> Repeat after me...
> 
> If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
> I Swear!!!
> 
> 
> Copy and paste this Vow into your response if you can promise to keep it.


*If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
I Swear!!! Oh yes I swear...ask Maddhatir! Thanks Sam. You were a ray of sunshine to me today. *


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
> I Swear!!! Oh yes I swear...ask Maddhatir! Thanks Sam. You were a ray of sunshine to me today. *




Partners in crime


----------



## Fitswimmer

> If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
> I Swear!!!


 
Do we spit on our palms and shake hands now?


----------



## maddhatir

Fitswimmer said:


> Do we spit on our palms and shake hands now?



*spit-tooo-eeeee*

put 'er there............


----------



## LisaZee

maddhatir said:


> OKAY! OKAY! I won't _THROW DOWN _with anyone!
> 
> There, ya happy!?
> 
> BUT! If you make me start singing "Koombya" I'M OUTTA HERE!



You don't have to sing "Koombya", but you DO have to drink this tasty Kool-Aid I have right here...


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Suzibrat said:


> *If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
> I Swear!!! Oh yes I swear...ask Maddhatir! Thanks Sam. You were a ray of sunshine to me today. *


Suzibrat   I thought you were a goner   

Glad you found us


----------



## LisaZee

Oooof!  I forgot...

If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
I Swear!!!


----------



## maddhatir

LisaZee said:


> You don't have to sing "Koombya", but you DO have to drink this tasty Kool-Aid I have right here...



I will not drink the Kool-Aid, 
I will not drink the Kool-Aid,
I will not drink the Kool-Aid,
I will not drink the Kool-Aid


----------



## Hixski

No Koombya for me!!! I am more of this kind of gal!!!
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I already did my swearing in to be nice. I tell you though I went over to that other realm and some of those people were being extremely vile. Let's just say I will be looking at some of the posters here on the DIS with fresh new eyes.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> No Koombya for me!!! I am more of this kind of gal!!!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I already did my swearing in to be nice. I tell you though I went over to that other realm and some of those people were being extremely vile. Let's just say I will be looking at some of the posters here on the DIS with fresh new eyes.



Some of them said the same thing about us. Like I care. 

Ya know Hix- you and I are the only ones over on our _happy other place _that are on this thread too- It P's me off that ANY of my friends over there like Alicia, Michelle, Toni, Meghan- any of them, would even think I hated their children b/c of reading something vile here.


----------



## Mozart

If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
I Swear!!!


P.S. My fingers were crossed.   

Seriously, if someone has nothing better to do than start a message board fight because they're feeling cranky, they're not worth wasting time on.

But just in case...my Clemson posse better have my back.


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Some of them said the same thing about us. Like I care.
> 
> Ya know Hix- you and I are the only ones over on our _happy other place _that are on this thread too- It P's me off that ANY of my friends over there like Alicia, Michelle, Toni, Meghan- any of them, would even think I hated their children b/c of reading something vile here.



I know that is what makes me sad.....I have so many people that would never in a million years think I hated children. They would be up in arms that people could lump everyone together like that.


----------



## Wishes n Dreams

Wow. it has been a while since I have posted, and a lot has gone on.  I can't believe the other thread got closed, I think maybe a warning first, but oh well.  I was just surfing the web and I found this cute article written by Ann Landers that I though you all would enjoy!
http://www.childfree.net/potpourri_annlanders.html


----------



## zima-cheryl

Shyvioletisme said:


> back semi on topic...for those with furbabies...how easy is it to board a cat who is 6 and never been boarded before. DH and I are supposed to go to Georgia to visit his parents this summer and will need to board our cat for the first time. We have no one who could come watch him...



I know I'm backtracking here... sorry.

I don't know if you are part of a church or similar organization, but we found our cat sitter by asking the lady at my church who teaches the Sr. High Sunday School kids (I've known her for years & I trust her recommendation).  We now have a very nice, reliable young gal who comes in every day to check our fur-babies when we are away.  



PhotobearSam said:


> If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be puled into a fight.
> I Swear!!!



I'm on board...


----------



## Aunt Michelle

If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
I Swear!!!

*********************************************************
I am Aunt Michelle and I approve this message.

 Thanks for having me. 

I don't know if any of you have seen the Room Escape game thread that solferino start a week or two ago. It's crazy and addicting. One thing I found was there are a few Japanese programmers who code these cute little room escapes. Sunday I was at my sister's for brunch (brunch is held at my sister's every Sunday morning - more often than not it is my parents, both sisters, both brothers-in-law, my nephew and all seven nieces - even with this bunch we always have too much food). After the food was cleared there was some work needed in the garage so I take on the role of entertainer for the children (only three nieces, one nephew this week), they are all very smart kids so I tell them about the room escapes. They had such a great time. The three year old kept running out to the garage with a play by play for the other adults - "we clicked on the picture and this funny little guy popped out!" 
We had trouble with one and had to leave it, because Aunt Michelle has her priorities - NASCAR in HD. So today I get a phone call from my niece, "Aunt Michelle, we were really wondering if you figured out how to get the key the little gremlin was hiding." - My sister says "you've created little puzzle monsters."


----------



## WDWguru

PhotobearSam said:


> If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
> I Swear!!!



Oh.... ooookaaaaayyyy. I'll play nice.


----------



## Wishes n Dreams

PhotobearSam said:


> \
> If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight.
> I Swear!!!


----------



## OU1247

I respect people who know that they don't want to be parents.
I am a very happy mom but as a teacher I see people all the time who really should NOT have kids.

I am just sad that people can't understand that.


----------



## plgrn

> I don't know if any of you have seen the Room Escape game thread that solferino start a week or two ago. It's crazy and addicting.



Yeeaaa....kind found that one


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> back semi on topic...for those with furbabies...how easy is it to board a cat who is 6 and never been boarded before.



When mom went away- she hired someone come to her house to feed the cats and just check on them. Of course, she had some refrences from other people in her neighborhood. 

So you have people like that in your area that advertise??? This way kitty will feel comfortable at home.


----------



## maddhatir

OU1247 said:


> I respect people who know that they don't want to be parents.
> I am a very happy mom but as a teacher I see people all the time who really should NOT have kids.
> 
> I am just sad that people can't understand that.



It seems we hear from a lot of teachers here. 

We only see things here and there.......You are all right there to witness it everyday!


----------



## disney_family_1247

I think you guys are awesome. I personally know lots of parents who are horrible at it (I'm not implying that you would be bad parents). Many of them had kids because they were expected to and not because they really wanted to be parents. Don't let people make you feel bad about your choice; you seem way more honest than a lot of people out there  .


----------



## Aunt Michelle

maddhatir said:


> When mom went away- she hired someone come to her house to feed the cats and just check on them. Of course, she had some refrences from other people in her neighborhood.
> 
> So you have people like that in your area that advertise??? This way kitty will feel comfortable at home.



I use a cat sitter as well. My felines find it very traumatic to be seperated, first from me and then from each other. Oh, and they are very change adverse, you wouldn't believe what happens when I move the furniture! You should be able to find someone who is bonded, and will come out and meet with you and the cat before you leave. For me, it is far cheaper because my sitter charges per visit not cat.


----------



## WDWguru

We've used a pet sitter for years. We have five kitties who would hate to leave home. We board our pug in a doggie daycare facility (she loves the company) and have a pet sitter come by once a day. She also checks the mail, cleans up any messes, waters plants and takes care of all that little stuff. We live in a condo, but when she sits for people in houses she even rotates the lights and such.

Try www.petsit.com and www.petsitters.org for people in your area. I just changed pet sitters (our old one got out of the biz) and interviewed three before I chose one. I'm very happy with our new one - she makes videos and sends them to us while we're away!!


----------



## Hixski

disney_family_1247 said:


> I think you guys are awesome. I personally know lots of parents who are horrible at it (I'm not implying that you would be bad parents). Many of them had kids because they were expected to and not because they really wanted to be parents. Don't let people make you feel bad about your choice; you seem way more honest than a lot of people out there  .



Thanks!!! We can use the support.


----------



## luvthemouse71

I'm always leery of asking this..but Plgrn, did you lose weight? If yes, then congrats..I'm on a "lifestyle modification plan" (I refuse to call it a diet! ) and would like to lose about 25 pounds. Sheesh, and it's been hard too. I work evenings at the hospital and don't go to bed until around 3 am- then I sleep in, because I love sleeping , and haven't been making it to the gym as often as I should. It's a vicious cycle!


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Partners in crime


 
    *You got that right!!! BTW..did you just spit on us??? Ewwwwwwwwww!  *



ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Suzibrat  I thought you were a goner
> 
> Glad you found us


*Thank you so much! I was lost for hours, trying to find you all and then a little magic happened and POOF!! there you all were in front of me. So I did a happy dance *
*I couldn't wait to get online this morning to catch up with you all. I got my coffee, cigs and the house is so peaceful! I watched the sun come up and then realized it had snowed yet AGAIN last night  I'm so sick of snow I could scream..not that I already haven't done just that. Hopefully the sun will get rid of a bit of it today and then I'll get to look at the brown grass and "doggie sculptures"...now there's a mental image for ya! *
*On the subject of boarding animals...we will be boarding our cat and one of our dogs but it's old hat to them. The first time I boarded our dog Maggie I was scared to death. But she does extremely well and doesn't mind it as long as the facility I take her to has alot of interaction with her (which they do). Rio, our cat, is so laid back...as long as he gets fed he could care less where he is. He's so cool! My little dog, Dolci, will be driven 525 miles to New York, to stay with my parents while we are gone in September. Yes, she's spoiled but the real reason is that she has seizures and I wouldn't board her for nothing! So we have to leave from another state to go to Disney but at least I'll have the peace of mind that she will be with "Grandpa & Grandma". Of course I'll be calling several times a day to check up on all of them and DH is already worried that he'll constantly hear "I miss my "kids!!!"   I told him to "deal with it buster or I'll throw you overboard at jungle cruise and let the mechanical critters eat you!"  *
*Hope you all have a great day!!!!!!*


----------



## PhotobearSam

disney_family_1247 said:


> I think you guys are awesome. I personally know lots of parents who are horrible at it (I'm not implying that you would be bad parents). Many of them had kids because they were expected to and not because they really wanted to be parents. Don't let people make you feel bad about your choice; you seem way more honest than a lot of people out there  .



I have seen this so many times (also people who get married because they have been together x amount of years and it's the next step)

I think the ONLY time one should have a child is if they would literally cannot imagine their lives without them. So many people have kids for the wrong reason...

Yesterday I found out one of my best friends is pregnant with #2 and another friend wants to start trying again. I was happy for one but not the other,,,Why?
Well, the one who is pregnant is a very good parent, is married to a wonderful husband and father, own a lovely home and have $$ in the bank. They have the means to afford this and have done an outstanding job with the first child.(their son's favourite words are thank you...Really sweet kid) I am really happy for them.

My other friend who moved her 4 year old son in with her boyfriend of 1 month, want another. They are unmarried (not that there is anything wrong with that but they used to say they wanted to get married), have known each other just over a year, live in a 2 bedroom rented apartment and can't even pay their bills now...She is a good mother but I feel this is irresponsible. Why not get a house first and then get pregnant...Not my life but I am not so happy for this one.

Does this make me a bad person?


----------



## Liisa

Hi all!

We got busy at work... then I come back here and holy crap!!!!  Lots of new stuff!  YAY!!!  Lots of new people.  

Suzibrat - I know completely what you are going through with a seizure dog.  My Yeti (see my avatar) was epileptic and stressful situations would end up resulting in a seizure for him.  We took very few vacations when he was with us, and even those were short.  Plus we could only leave him with my parents (how on earth do you ask someone else to watch an epileptic dog?!!)  We lost him last January and as heartbroken as I still am, certain aspects of life are much easier with the two dogs I have.  (that being said, I'd trade the freedom in a heartbeat if I could get him back).

Just over two (verrrryy llloooonnngg) months until my Mexico vacay.  Of course, my running program is completely off course.  I've been busy nursing the chomp on my leg from breaking up the last dog fight between Kayla (the rescue) and my Pari.  I can't believe this darn thing still hurts this much 2 weeks later.  UGH!

Oh,  and I promise to try really, really hard to "If anyone comes to this thread and criticizes us, we will turn the other cheek and not be pulled into a fight."  It's just that sometime, I can't control myself.  You know, some people just get under your skin.  But, I don't want this thread closed, so I'll be on my very, very best behavior.  Now we spit?   

Welcome all!!!!  This is great!

Liisa


----------



## Liisa

PhotobearSam said:


> Does this make me a bad person?



Not in my book.  I've thought the exact same thing about several people I know that were having kids when I thought they should wait.  I wouldn't bring an animal into my life if I couldn't afford food and vet bills and such.  Shouldn't it be the same thought process?!!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Hi all!
> 
> We got busy at work... then I come back here and holy crap!!!!  Lots of new stuff!  YAY!!!  Lots of new people.
> 
> Now we spit?
> 
> Liisa



hey Lis!!! Welcome...back..... 

You can spit- but just try and keep it in your hand- and do a PRETEND shake. This way Suzi does not think you are spitting at her 

Odd- no matter what subject comes up- this man is always on my brain- Mr Depp and spitting....hmmmmm 






Hey guys--- question?

Has anyone ever been to Bonaire????

DH is now obsessing over this place. Since he was so spoiled being able to walk right into the water from our resort beach in Mexico- he has been looking up places that have good snorkeling. We had the BEST places to snorkel when we lived in St John, only the locals knew of some of them- of course we would steer clear of the tourist trap- TRUNK BAY! Any time you see people with large hats, black socks and sandals on the beach- RUN! 

Just curiuos of any of you have ever been??

PS- went to the docs yesterday @ The Penn Spine Center in Philly for my back- the doc told me my body is healing itself- he said would LOVE to give me a steroid injection But he does NOT feel I need one! 

He is concerned with the weakness the herniated disc has done to my left leg though. He also told me only time will tell if I will ever get the feeling back in the skin of my knee and shin or reflex back in my left knee- I guess I will not be accidently KICKING someone with my left leg now!  Darn! 

He would like me to start up PT (Friday- 1st appt) and gave me a RX for Celebrex- after reading the risks- I decided to skip the stuff- heart attack, internal bleeding anyone? No thanks. I have never taken a med that had such serious possible side effects-
creeps me out. I have major family history of heart disease!

Heck- I will stick with my percocets if I need something for pain. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_MUCH more fun _than a heart attack, internal bleeding, ulcers


----------



## Suzibrat

Liisa said:


> Hi all!
> 
> We got busy at work... then I come back here and holy crap!!!! Lots of new stuff! YAY!!! Lots of new people.
> 
> Suzibrat - I know completely what you are going through with a seizure dog. My Yeti (see my avatar) was epileptic and stressful situations would end up resulting in a seizure for him. We took very few vacations when he was with us, and even those were short. Plus we could only leave him with my parents (how on earth do you ask someone else to watch an epileptic dog?!!) We lost him last January and as heartbroken as I still am, certain aspects of life are much easier with the two dogs I have. (that being said, I'd trade the freedom in a heartbeat if I could get him back).
> 
> 
> Liisa


 
*Oh Liisa, I'm so sorry to hear about Yeti! What a heartbreaker.*



maddhatir said:


> hey Lis!!! Welcome...back.....
> 
> You can spit- but just try and keep it in your hand- and do a PRETEND shake. This way Suzi does not think you are spitting at her


  *I'll put on my rain gear just in case!  I hope you get feeling better quick! You must be in incredible pain! Maybe a trip to the Mouse is the answer??? *
*Bonaire? Sounds like a lovely new chocolate that I haven't tried yet...oh wait..it's actually a place??? Nevermind *


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:


> We've used a pet sitter for years. We have five kitties who would hate to leave home.



The past few days *I* have been a pet sitter to my cousins- 4 cats, AND a stray He and his wife go on vacations all the time and I volunteer to feed the kitties 2x a day and ......clean the litter box- if he is gone for along time. bleck. NOT my favorite thing to do!

He just did a quick trip to N Carolina just to see the NJ Devils play- he does that often, flies to different cities just to see his sports teams play.

BUT- he and his wife are now pregnant! So, I am not sure if the quick trips to see the Devils play hockey or going to Phillies spring training will be in their future! Maybe spring training b/c that they make a whole vacation out of. 

Uh-oh isn't that basketball crap coming up soon- the big game? What is that called The Final 4 or something? ( I am a die hard _puck bunny_- I know nothing about any other sport) He usually flies to Vegas for that- I might be pet sitting again. 

How can you NOT love a sport where the guys look like this (and stay in the game to play!)- our _HOT_ Capt, Jason Smith, ladies and gentlemen


----------



## PhotobearSam

Glad everyone has found us...I have met the OP of this thread at Disney and I want to thank her for opening this dialogue. (They were super nice people...)

Well, what shall we all do now? I need a drink but all I have in the house is MILK...Anyone want any?

LOL


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Glad everyone has found us...I have met the OP of this thread at Disney and I want to thank her for opening this dialogue. (They were super nice people...)
> 
> Well, what shall we all do now? I need a drink but all I have in the house is MILK...Anyone want any?
> 
> LOL



Nahhh, no thanks- I only drink soy milk....has to be Silk though 

ETA- Hey! I CAN break out the bottle of Absinthe I got over the internet from Europe- hmmm- note for tonight....break out the bottle of Absinthe......


----------



## Suzibrat

PhotobearSam said:


> Glad everyone has found us...I have met the OP of this thread at Disney and I want to thank her for opening this dialogue. (They were super nice people...)
> 
> Well, what shall we all do now? I need a drink but all I have in the house is MILK...Anyone want any?
> 
> LOL


*I have the Jack Daniels but ran out of coke.....maybe we can combine it with the milk and make a JackShake?*



maddhatir said:


> Nahhh, no thanks- I only drink soy milk....has to be Silk though


*Ohh I love Silk soymilk. Especially the chocolate one....which I am out of at the present moment *


----------



## PhotobearSam

but...do you likes cows...LOL


Ok, enough of the inside jokes...Sorry guys.


Now, we took a trip to the world in Dec and had a great 2 weeks. We were joined by 2 disers (mother / daughter) and they brought along their grandmother as well..
Picture this, me (35) DH (38) DISer #1 (54) Diser #2 (23) and their mother/gran (79)...Neat difference there.

Well, hardly saw ANY bad behaviour from any children...It was awesome. We even saw a few who were outstanding and we gave them some pins...EXCEPT for this one kid at AK on Dec 16th. We had stopped for lunch at Flame tree and we sat down to eat...

We then HEARD the most god awful screams from a child I have ever heard. She was yelling at her Dad (she was about 3 or 4 and he was sitting eating while she sat in her stroller 4 feet away) and yelling at him to move her stroller. He would not. She yelled about that at the top of her lungs for over 10 minutes. We tried to ignore it. Then, she got out of her stroller and pushed it herself to the table and starting screaming again. 

I figured that top of the lungs screaming would tire anyone out after 5 minutes or so but this lasted in total 45 minutes and was still going on after they left the area as we could hear her scream while they walked away.

After 20 minutes, DISer #1 looked at her and said "Stop it, be quiet!" (she a nurse and she said this usually works at the clinic) but the Dad just laughed and said "She won't stop...I don't even try anymore... She does this all the time"

I can't believe that he did nothing. I had a lot of pity for him that day because I thought maybe the child had problems but then I thought "Why does he not take her out to the car, or the benches outside the gates and give her a time out or something...?" 

Short of a spanking, I have no idea what could be done but I hated that we were subjected to this. I have had normal tantrums happen around me before and I have never said anything to the folks because most of the time, they seem embarrassed enough already, but this day...I was shocked.

We laughed about it because we were at AK and it did give us a conversation topic for the meal. 

We later had a Mom apologize to us because her son was being a bit whiny in line ahead of us for a ride...We told her, No worries. We met the spawn of Satan already this trip...you child is an angel compared to that one...She seemed relieved. 

We have all decided that at WDW, we will see some melt downs and if we decide that it's not a big deal, then it is not but that one child, that was too much.


----------



## Mozart

PhotobearSam said:


> We have all decided that at WDW, we will see some melt downs and if we decide that it's not a big deal, then it is not but that one child, that was too much.



I can honestly say that in my trips to WDW, I have seen very few children have meltdowns.

Parents however, are a different story.  I have also run into quite a few people who didn't seem to have kids with them that were quite rude as well.  I think it has something to do with getting food at counter service restaurants.  Seems like nearly every meltdown I've ever seen is either in a food court, or just outside of one.


----------



## Suzibrat

*Love them cows!  *
*You know what's weird? I don't remember any kids the last time I was at Disney. DH asked me if there was alot of screaming and yelling but I honestly never noticed any! What you went thru must have been the worst! My neighbor's 6 year old is like that. And if screaming doesn't get her what she wants she will go over to her mother and grab her face, making her mother look directly at her while she's doing all this screaming! I asked her how she can allow this to go on and she said "oh I just let her go because it's easier than arguing with her". I couldn't believe it. We've had to ban her from our house because she kicked my dog in the face. I told her that wasn't acceptable in MY house and she started the scream fest with me. At that point I told her mother to take her home and she wasn't allowed back EVER. Her mother was relieved because she said it gave her an excuse to come over without having to bring the child with her. *
*I feel sorry for both my neighbor and her daughter. The kid seems to have real issues and the Mom doesn't want to deal with them. What's she going to be like when she's a little older? Her mother said "oh now that she's in school they will straighten her out." I told her I don't think it's the school's responsibility to fix the problems that have started in her home. That's alot to dump on an unsuspecting teacher!  *


----------



## PhotobearSam

Suzibrat said:


> *Love them cows!  *
> *You know what's weird? I don't remember any kids the last time I was at Disney. DH asked me if there was alot of screaming and yelling but I honestly never noticed any! What you went thru must have been the worst! My neighbor's 6 year old is like that. And if screaming doesn't get her what she wants she will go over to her mother and grab her face, making her mother look directly at her while she's doing all this screaming! I asked her how she can allow this to go on and she said "oh I just let her go because it's easier than arguing with her". I couldn't believe it. We've had to ban her from our house because she kicked my dog in the face. I told her that wasn't acceptable in MY house and she started the scream fest with me. At that point I told her mother to take her home and she wasn't allowed back EVER. Her mother was relieved because she said it gave her an excuse to come over without having to bring the child with her. *
> *I feel sorry for both my neighbor and her daughter. The kid seems to have real issues and the Mom doesn't want to deal with them. What's she going to be like when she's a little older? Her mother said "oh now that she's in school they will straighten her out." I told her I don't think it's the school's responsibility to fix the problems that have started in her home. That's alot to dump on an unsuspecting teacher!  *



  Horrible...That started small and the mother let it get that way...Awful


----------



## Shyvioletisme

zima-cheryl said:


> I know I'm backtracking here... sorry.
> 
> I don't know if you are part of a church or similar organization, but we found our cat sitter by asking the lady at my church who teaches the Sr. High Sunday School kids (I've known her for years & I trust her recommendation).  We now have a very nice, reliable young gal who comes in every day to check our fur-babies when we are away.



nope...athiest here...so no church...we really arent' involved in a whole lot in our town other than DH's work....But I certainly wouldn't trust any of those people in my home with my cat...I still don't know them well enough...I just worry about boarding him...he is so clingy with me...


----------



## Shyvioletisme

WDWguru said:


> We've used a pet sitter for years. We have five kitties who would hate to leave home. We board our pug in a doggie daycare facility (she loves the company) and have a pet sitter come by once a day. She also checks the mail, cleans up any messes, waters plants and takes care of all that little stuff. We live in a condo, but when she sits for people in houses she even rotates the lights and such.
> 
> Try www.petsit.com and www.petsitters.org for people in your area. I just changed pet sitters (our old one got out of the biz) and interviewed three before I chose one. I'm very happy with our new one - she makes videos and sends them to us while we're away!!



thanks for the links..I'll check them out...

edit: I found 3 really good sounding prospects in my town! I'd really prefer this option as my Lestat is not a social cat and I think would really suffer in boarding. So thank you so much...I had no idea there were sites to search for pet sitters!!


----------



## acm563

I love reading all the posts on here and I just had to comment on 2 things...1 leaving kitty ...gosh I know how you feel. I travel a lot on business and my Meowey is definitly my baby( he was my sons cat but for some reason never attached himself to anyone but me) I learned that when I was leaving him with family he could not handle the change and so he urinated on everything so of course they hated me and I cannot bear to board him anywhere as I am scared he will be mistreated. The longest I have ever left him has been for 6 nights but the best solution that I found for HIM was to actually leave him at home in his comfortable surroundings. I leave enough food all over the house...as well as leaving the bag where he can get to it(thankfully he eats dry fd) and make sure his litter box is cleaned the morning I leave. I leave an actual answering machine on my phone when I leave and I call and leave him messages so he can hear my voice...(No I am not psycho, I just love my cat...lol)
On the other note...about screaming children. My son is 25 and when he was younger i would have never tolerated him acting like that. I do not believe there are bad kids(not at that young age) only bad parents. My great niece is 9 and I took her for the first time in 2005 and then again last year and my thoughts on the subject are that if you are taking little ones to WDW then you need to go at THEIR pace not yours and that is where parents mess up. These kids are EXHAUSTED, they need a nap and we are so anxious to make them have a good time and see it all that we forget that. I have 22 great nieces and nephews and the one little girl is the only one I would consider taking to WDW but that is because she has been disciplined and knows how to act.  I have to admit, I am rethinking wanting grandchildren after what I have seen but hold onto the fact that I dont think my son would tolerate his child misbehaving and I know whether it is my grandchild or not, they will behave if they are around me. Kids will be kids and I have no issues with that,but when it gets into the temper tantrums or being whiney my tolerance goes out the door
and HURRAY!!!!! for anyone that has the courage to stand up and say it is MY CHOICE to not have children. There would be fewer unwanted and abused children if more people would do that as parenting is not for everyone for various reasons....


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Mozart said:


> But just in case...my Clemson posse better have my back.


 I got your back!  



Suzibrat said:


> Of course I'll be calling several times a day to check up on all of them and DH is already worried that he'll constantly hear "I miss my "kids!!!"   I told him to "deal with it buster or I'll throw you overboard at jungle cruise and let the mechanical critters eat you!"  [/B]
> *Hope you all have a great day!!!!!!*


  I do this to the kennel when we go away.  They told me they don't mind, though.  It puts my mind at ease to know he's doing well.



PhotobearSam said:


> Does this make me a bad person?


Absolutely not.  I have a sister-in-law  I just honestly have to shake my head at!!  I'm trying to remain calm as I even write this. . . . she has 5 children (would have been 6 but she miscarried one) and they get help from the state.  She is married to the same man for, must be 14 or 15 years.  Anyway, the guy is lazy.  Don't get me wrong, he works in the construction field but that's not at a job/career that's going anywhere.  He stays at the job because he likes to be freeeeee.  He'll call off because _SHE_ stubs her toe!  He's had opportunities to work at WalMart w/ a steady, reliable income and benefits but he turned it down because they only give you 2 weeks vacation and they have to be scheduled.  --Would somebody please hit the back of my head and knock my eyes back down.  They're stuck from rolling them! --  Anyway they've bought things and they've been reposessed.  He rents a house that my father-in-law has and most of the time he doesn't pay his rent (yup, fil has a big mouth) but F-i-L doesn't kick them out because of the (say it with me everyone) "Children".  My sister in law has Ulcerative Colitis and is sick quite often (but yet she keeps having babies w/ a beat up body).  Before they got on the state insurance many times she couldn't afford her medicine (but they keep having children).  My niece and nephew both have asthma and have been hospitalized because of it.  Everyone of her kids have been "accidents".  At least that's what she tells us.  She'll say, "I don't know how this happened."  I'm like, I do.  Want me to draw pictures? The youngest one is just barely a year old.  She had a C-Section w/ her.  SiL always said if she had a C-Section she'd get her tubes tied?  Think she did?  NOPE!  BiL won't even though his responsible brother begged him for his wife's health sake.  BiL won't because (are you ready for this????) it will make him _less_ of a man  and he might want more kids.  NO, what makes you less of a man is your irresponsible behavior!  My inlaws put all the blame on BiL but let's be honest.  SiL isn't innocent here and the damsel in distress thing is gettin' old!  SiL was going to go get a job (so she says) but she miraculously turned up pregnant.  Anyway, they can barely support/afford themselves but lets go make more mouths to feed!  Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my nieces and nephews!!  Did you hear that???  I said I LOVE my nieces and nephews (hell I've got I think 19 at last count) but to continue to bring little lives into this world when you can't take care of them is JUST wrong.  Course, I know there are many who will think I'm being judgemental but I see how they're being brought up and how they go w/out and . . . I'm just going to stop here.



Mozart said:


> I can honestly say that in my trips to WDW, I have seen very few children have meltdowns.
> 
> Parents however, are a different story.  I have also run into quite a few people who didn't seem to have kids with them that were quite rude as well.  I think it has something to do with getting food at counter service restaurants.  Seems like nearly every meltdown I've ever seen is either in a food court, or just outside of one.


 I agree.  The adults are way worse!  I almost saw a throw down at one of the parades because one man got in front of another man.  A CM litterally stood between them the entire time the parade went on at MGM and then escorted them both out at the end.  I've seen parents freaking out on their children because they're just a bit whiny from being overloaded w/ the park excitement.  Definately, mostly the adults.



Suzibrat said:


> Her mother said "oh now that she's in school they will straighten her out." I told her I don't think it's the school's responsibility to fix the problems that have started in her home. That's alot to dump on an unsuspecting teacher!  [/B]


 OH my Goodness!  My poor sister is a teacher and boy some of the stories she tells.

I've been wanting to stop in all morning but you know how work is.  Tends to get in the way of all the fun.  Thank goodenss lunch is coming up soon I'm starving!

Talk to you all soon.


----------



## aclov

About once a month a group of us get together for dinner but I have a friend that ALWAYS brings her little girl, it's like she' attached to her hip.   I don't have children (not by choice, I've gone through plenty of treatment) and my best friend of 20 years doesn't have any (she likes her childfree life, lots of nieces/nephews).   Our other friends are able to get a sitter or leave the kids with  the spouse but this one insists on always bringing her kid.    I give her enough notice to find a sitter or tell her it's "adult's only" but she doesn't get it.  I'd hate to stop inviting her, so I tell my BF that I'm going to call and remind her about our dinner plans this weekend and this is her response....
"No don't remind her, you already told her and besides she is going to bring her little girl and I don't feel like hearing no kid acting up.  I want to 
enjoy my dinner, you know what I mean".    

So I guess I'll need to be blunt with my friend and tell her not to bring her child, but I know how mothers can be overprotective so it's nothing against her child, I like the little girl but I want my friends attention.


----------



## aclov

maddhatir said:


> When mom went away- she hired someone come to her house to feed the cats and just check on them. Of course, she had some refrences from other people in her neighborhood.
> 
> So you have people like that in your area that advertise??? This way kitty will feel comfortable at home.



Hiring a pet sitter is a great idea!   I have a friend who is a pet nanny and this is what she does for a living.   She's a big animal lover so this is the perfect job for her.


----------



## Hixski

PhotobearSam said:


> Glad everyone has found us...I have met the OP of this thread at Disney and I want to thank her for opening this dialogue. (They were super nice people...)
> 
> Well, what shall we all do now? I need a drink but all I have in the house is MILK...Anyone want any?
> 
> LOL



I had a glass of wine very early this am before I went to bed. (I work nights) It came out of a box if you are not a wine snob.  

Madd: Glad your back is doing better! When your back is down that is the pits. My knees are shot.....too many sports all these years. I have even had to give up my beloved snow skiing unless I get knee replacements. They are not bad enough for that but they are bad enough for me not to be able to ski. I can still do a run or 2 but not worth the price of a lift ticket. I guess hanging out in the Caribbean will have to do!


----------



## aclov

Fitswimmer said:


> me too.  I'm not married either, which is why I never posted over here, and I'm going to miss the other one.



I'm childfree not by choice and I sometimes post here.    I think as long as you respect other people's decisions and not criticize.    I also feel like I can unwind a little when my "mother of the year" friend gets on my nerves -  other people can understand!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hixski said:


> I had a glass of wine very early this am before I went to bed. (I work nights) It came out of a box if you are not a wine snob.
> 
> Madd: Glad your back is doing better! When your back is down that is the pits. My knees are shot.....too many sports all these years. I have even had to give up my beloved snow skiing unless I get knee replacements. They are not bad enough for that but they are bad enough for me not to be able to ski. I can still do a run or 2 but not worth the price of a lift ticket. I guess hanging out in the Caribbean will have to do!


Hey I'm from Jersey (originally) we drink wine outta' boxes!  

Oh, Madd, I meant to ask you how your back was doing.  My dad had his surgery yesterday for (I'm pretty sure he said) herniated disc.  He called me this morning, on his way home, and he sounded great.  He said the pain is no longer shooting down his leg.


----------



## Liisa

It's the school's responsibility?!!    Seriously, do parents think they have no responsibility in the raising of their offspring?  Did anyone catch the woman on TV who couldn't control her three teenage boys and went on "strike"?  Or how about the woman on TV this morning whose daughter flipped out on a school bus driver?  And then when the interviewer mentioned that the daughter was a handful, the mother said - she's a teenager, she hangs out at the mall and has friends and makes decisions - as if it was normal and ok for the kid to freak out.   

My 5 year old nephew is a pretty good kid, he needs work, but he's not a complete pain.  But after a week in WDW with him, I KNOW I made a good choice not to have kids.  I don't have the patience or desire for that much work 24 hrs a day.  Maybe, before people get pregnant, they should be forced to take a 5 or 6 yo to Disney for a week.  That might open up alot of eyes.  They are alot of work.  And if the parents aren't going to step up and do it, who will?  They had the kid, they signed on for everything that goes with it.  

Sorry, after those two news stories, my bad parent radar is on red alert. 

Happy thoughts... happy thoughts... happy thoughts....   darn it, why does it have to be so cold and wintery out!?!?!?


----------



## Suzibrat

acm563 said:


> I love reading all the posts on here and I just had to comment on 2 things...1 leaving kitty ...gosh I know how you feel. I travel a lot on business and my Meowey is definitly my baby( he was my sons cat but for some reason never attached himself to anyone but me) I learned that when I was leaving him with family he could not handle the change and so he urinated on everything so of course they hated me and I cannot bear to board him anywhere as I am scared he will be mistreated. The longest I have ever left him has been for 6 nights but the best solution that I found for HIM was to actually leave him at home in his comfortable surroundings. I leave enough food all over the house...as well as leaving the bag where he can get to it(thankfully he eats dry fd) and make sure his litter box is cleaned the morning I leave. *I leave an actual answering machine on my phone when I leave and I call and leave him messages so he can hear my voice...(No I am not psycho, I just love my cat...lol)*


 
*I often do this when I'm going to be gone all day shopping..glad to know I'm not the only one!  *



Mozart said:


> I can honestly say that in my trips to WDW, I have seen very few children have meltdowns.
> 
> Parents however, are a different story. I have also run into quite a few people who didn't seem to have kids with them that were quite rude as well. I think it has something to do with getting food at counter service restaurants. Seems like nearly every meltdown I've ever seen is either in a food court, or just outside of one.


 
*You nailed that one right on the head! I saw a meltdown between 2 parents who were shoving their kids in front of each other at the MK to get to Winnie The Pooh. They were literally screaming at one another in front of their kids, and the kids were crying their eyes out. The one child was scared to pieces of the giant Pooh but Mom wasn't going to miss a photo op!*



aclov said:


> About once a month a group of us get together for dinner but I have a friend that ALWAYS brings her little girl, it's like she' attached to her hip. I don't have children (not by choice, I've gone through plenty of treatment) and my best friend of 20 years doesn't have any (she likes her childfree life, lots of nieces/nephews). Our other friends are able to get a sitter or leave the kids with the spouse but this one insists on always bringing her kid. I give her enough notice to find a sitter or tell her it's "adult's only" but she doesn't get it. I'd hate to stop inviting her, so I tell my BF that I'm going to call and remind her about our dinner plans this weekend and this is her response....
> "No don't remind her, you already told her and besides she is going to bring her little girl and I don't feel like hearing no kid acting up. I want to
> enjoy my dinner, you know what I mean".
> 
> So I guess I'll need to be blunt with my friend and tell her not to bring her child, but I know how mothers can be overprotective so it's nothing against her child, I like the little girl but I want my friends attention.


*Make sure you tell her that "Girls Night Out" has now been changed to "Big Girls Out Who Can Legally Drink And Vote"  What a shme that she feels she can't even take that little time out to visit with her friends...*


----------



## Suzibrat

Hixski said:


> I had a glass of wine very early this am before I went to bed. (I work nights) It came out of a box if you are not a wine snob.


 


ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Hey I'm from Jersey (originally) we drink wine outta' boxes!


 
*I LOVE Box O Wine!! No wine snob here! I'd like to kiss the guy that invented it but I'm sure he's either really old or dead by now. I know, I'm just assuming it was a guy....... *


Liisa said:


> It's the school's responsibility?!!  Seriously, do parents think they have no responsibility in the raising of their offspring??


*I know, I know...isn't that a horrible way to deal with home problems?    I feel so sorry for her teacher. It isn't fair to the teacher or any future teachers she has. Unless they work on the problem at home nothing will change. You should see her raising havoc in WalMart. You'd think someone was being disemboweled from the time they walk into the store until the time they leave...and that's even after they give into her demands for a new toy. *


----------



## maddhatir

acm563 said:


> I leave enough food all over the house...as well as leaving the bag where he can get to it(thankfully he eats dry fd)



Welcome!

I was just laughing when reading about the bag of dry food- when I went into my cousin's house yesterday to feed the kitties....I walk in.....and I can see little bits of food strewn about the floor...... ......I am thinking- what the????..........I look, and the door to the food cabinet was open and the bag of food was on its side on the floor- I was cracking up!  Little %$#@ers- no one would fess up  Good thing there was only a tiny bit of food in the bag anyway- I would have walked into a house full of kitty puke! 




> I do not believe there are bad kids(not at that young age) only bad parents.



ITA- like I said....bullies- breed bullies! Good luck with that people  




> My great niece is 9 and I took her for the first time in 2005 and then again last year and my thoughts on the subject are that if you are taking little ones to WDW then you need to go at THEIR pace not yours and that is where parents mess up. These kids are EXHAUSTED



I know some of you may know this already but I just had to share my experience with some of the new peeps here. 

DH and I made this mistake (it was really MY fault)...once and never again! We took our niece to Disney for her first trip ever- she was 4 at the time. Well I am used to doing the parks kamakazie style- I wanted to be sure she saw everything etc- 

Well- she had a MAJOR meltdown one night! I just told her do not run into the pool area of the hotel! I told her we have to go back to the room to get dressed and we are having dinner with Cinderella- well, guess where she ran. 

I stayed calm- I did not yell, I said, come over here- or like I told you NO Cinderella- she went ballistic- she was screaming it was not fair- I swear on my life- this is what she looked like and she kept saying it was not fair rotfl2: sure I can laugh now!) I just kept saying- keep walking, keep walking and she kept falling to the ground  it's not fair lmao: I didn't even say we WEREN'T going- I just said if you keep it up we won't)

Parents were just walking by giving me the "I KNOWWWW how you feel LOOK" I just kept talking to her calmly (all the while DH never knew any of this was happening- b/c he was in the gift shop picking up his daily- get off the bus- beer) She went screaming into the elevator- screaming down the hall to our room THE SCREAMING WOULD NOT STOP!  FOR THE LOVE OF GOD- IT WON'T STOP! How do people put up with this??! 

In the room she was still screaming! All I wanted to do was get her out of her wet clothes b/c it had been raining and she was throwing herself on the ground! All I could picture was this- security knocks on the door b/c there is a child screaming, said child is NOW naked b/c she crawled UNDER the bed so I cannot dress her And the woman answering the door is NOT this child's mother! 

Lovely scenerio huh!? DH came back and she finally calmed down- so he had NO idea what just happened I told him he HAS to take her alone- I CANNOT do this tonight. See! Right there- I knew this LONG ago that I do not want to deal with this kind of thing- hence- NO KIDS! When he was younger, he took care of his baby niece who lived with them- so he is very patient with kids. Me, I have no patience for anything!

He is such a  he got dressed up and we put her dress on and he took her on a "date" So get this- they got on the bus- as soon as they started moving SHE WAS DEAD ASLEEP!!!!!! DH took the bus to the Market Place to catch the resort bus to the GF- 

They got to the GF- he carried her off the bus, still sleeping, and they called their name- but she would NOT wake up!!- Poor DH had to do the bus thing all over again to get back to the hotel.

She woke up the next morning and asked if she had dinner with Cinderella! We just cracked up!

SO- I agree 100%- go at a slowwwww pace. Or do what we do now- take her parents along! We will take the kids for one night so SIL and BIL can have their night, but the rest of the vacation- No worries for us! 

We have been to Disney alone about 13 times- and just the few times that we have gone "as a family" With BIL, SIL and their 2 kids, *cannot* compare to the fun you have when you are just 2 adults enjoying Disney.

Even thought the kid's parents are there- it is still _NOT_ the same experience. We have to have our "alone time" for the parks a few times when we go with them.

Disney is such a romantic place- I do not get why people say Disney is a place for kids 

Those people have never had the BEST Disney experience....alone, just you and your spouse, strolling, enjoying, relaxing! Too bad for them.

Why would you take kids to Disney is beyond me!


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> We have been to Disney alone about 13 times- and just the few times that we have gone "as a family" With BIL, SIL and their 2 kids, *cannot* compare to the fun you have when you are just 2 adults enjoying Disney.



I totally!!! agree.  When we took my nephew, we had my MIL with us and her husband as well.  They did alot of the routine stuff (getting him dressed, showered, etc.  But the constant attention needing.  After the third full day, I told my husband I really, really needed some ME time.  But we were like a group of lemmings (I think that's the right animal)... where one went, we all went.  I was ready to SCREAM!  I still get shakes thinking about it.  I even started to not enjoy Disney (oh the horror!)  I'm not taking anymore kids until they are 15/16 and can 1) keep up with us  2) have adult meals and 3) go off on their own for a bit.  So in 3 years, my 13 yo niece can come back with us - we'll even bring a friend of hers to keep her occupied.  Her brother is NOT allowed to come with us (we are calling it her "graduation present" so he can't worm his way in).

4 weeks after that, DH and I went alone for a shorter trip.  It was bliss.  Late mornings, late nights, good dinners, afternoon bar breaks....  Oooohhhh, I just found my happy place!


----------



## Fitswimmer

Since I'm new here-I'll explain my child experience.  About 4 months after my cousin had her second child, she decided that kids weren't near as much fun as drinking and doing drugs with her friends from HS. This left her husband, a really nice guy and a good father-alone with a 3 year old boy and a 4 month old girl.  We called a family meeting and divided up the responsiblilities.  Gramma and Pop got the 3 year old and I got the baby from 3:30 every day so their Dad could work.  She's my goddaughter in the truest sense of the word, but I refer to her as DN here just for simplicity. 

She had her first meltdown with me at the local mall.  I carried her out the door, put her in the car and we went home.  Same thing happened with tantrum #2 at the beach.  She found out pretty quickly that when she pulled that with me, whatever fun we were having ended fast.   

When she was 5 and her brother was 8, Mom and Dad and I took them with us to WDW.  The first day we're walking around and some kid is having a major meltdown.  DN turns to me and says in all 5 year old seriousness  "If I was doing that, we'd be back on the plane, wouldn't we?"   I told her "darn straight!"   She still says she really believed that I would get right back on the plane!  

Friends have said that by taking on the job of dealing with her in my 20's I gave up opportunities to marry and have kids of my own-and that may be true.  However, I don't regret any of it for a minute.  I loved my child free life from the day she got old enough not to need as much care, and I still do today.  Unlike other child-free people that we have all come across-I don't hate kids or the people that have them.  DN is the only kid that I've ever actually wanted to spend time with though.


----------



## maddhatir

Fitswimmer said:


> Since I'm new here-I'll explain my child experience.  About 4 months after my cousin had her second child, she decided that kids weren't near as much fun as drinking and doing drugs with her friends from HS. This left her husband, a really nice guy and a good father-alone with a 3 year old boy and a 4 month old girl.  We called a family meeting and divided up the responsiblilities.  Gramma and Pop got the 3 year old and I got the baby from 3:30 every day so their Dad could work.  She's my goddaughter in the truest sense of the word, but I refer to her as DN here just for simplicity.
> 
> She had her first meltdown with me at the local mall.  I carried her out the door, put her in the car and we went home.  Same thing happened with tantrum #2 at the beach.  She found out pretty quickly that when she pulled that with me, whatever fun we were having ended fast.
> 
> When she was 5 and her brother was 8, Mom and Dad and I took them with us to WDW.  The first day we're walking around and some kid is having a major meltdown.  DN turns to me and says in all 5 year old seriousness  "If I was doing that, we'd be back on the plane, wouldn't we?"   I told her "darn straight!"   She still says she really believed that I would get right back on the plane!
> 
> Friends have said that by taking on the job of dealing with her in my 20's I gave up opportunities to marry and have kids of my own-and that may be true.  However, I don't regret any of it for a minute.  I loved my child free life from the day she got old enough not to need as much care, and I still do today.  Unlike other child-free people that we have all come across-I don't hate kids or the people that have them.  DN is the only kid that I've ever actually wanted to spend time with though.



 All I can say is WOW! That is incredible. 

I would hope that in a situation like that- I can step up and do what I had to do- But in all honesty- I am not sure I could! I don't think I have it in me!

But of course, there would be NO choice in the matter.


----------



## acm563

OMG, y'all crack me up...Guess I shouldnt post here since I have a 'kid' but its the very things you have experienced that make me so grateful I did not have another one...God knew what was best for me is all I have to say  I want to state that I have a lot of friends that do not have or want kids and it is not because they do not love children, most of them do...its just not what they want full time so they borrow everyone elses kids when the urge hits them. I have no desire for any more kids, I so could not handle it 24/7 at my age but I have a ball when I borrow my great-niece as long as it is not to an amusement parks. I agree totally that I do not understand where ppl get that WDW is for kids.I think it would be best experienced as a 16th birthday gift or something...
But anyway I just wanted to say I have appreciated the chuckles and if you ever see me at DW make sure you stop and say hello I will be the one without the screaming child


----------



## maddhatir

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Hey I'm from Jersey (originally) we drink wine outta' boxes!
> 
> Oh, Madd, I meant to ask you how your back was doing.  My dad had his surgery yesterday for (I'm pretty sure he said) herniated disc.  He called me this morning, on his way home, and he sounded great.  He said the pain is no longer shooting down his leg.



OH! I wanted to ask you about your dad!!!! That is great he is pain free so soon! Good sign- 

guess what? my MIL did the same thing as your father- with the 2nd opinion thing- she needed spine fusion in her C spine and I TRIED to get her to get a 2nd opinion- but she said- I NEED the surgery- why would I get a 2nd opinion (ummmm b/c the guy who is doing it JUST may be a dope!) and he turned out to be a dope! I was not trying to tell her to get the 2nd opinion b/c she might not need the surgery I was trying to tell her to go "over the bridge" into Philly and see a specialist there- NOT from your hometown!

It has been about 4 years now- she is still in a neck brace and she needs to have an additional surgery to try and at least get her a SMALL amount of relief in her neck! But she will never be able to turn her head again- We took her to Jefferson and another doc @ NYU for their opinion about the 2nd surgery. We are so close to such great Medical Universities- WHY would you waste your time with a hometown doc??

She can't work, or drive, she is always in pain. She is only in her early 60s. 

Hey! I am from Jersey and I will have to say- I prefer a good red from the bottle Has to be dry. Preferably a Shiraz, or Syrah - does not have to be expensive though.

I do have to say I *AM* a beer snob!

HAS to be dark- LOVE my Becks Dark!!!!! 

When we are leisurely strolling through EPCOT- gotta have a Becks Dark in Germany and I DO like the Dos Equis in Mexico. And of course, as some of you may know already......CHAMPAGNE IN FRANCE! I love my champagne!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

aclov said:


> About once a month a group of us get together for dinner but I have a friend that ALWAYS brings her little girl, it's like she' attached to her hip.   I don't have children (not by choice, I've gone through plenty of treatment) and my best friend of 20 years doesn't have any (she likes her childfree life, lots of nieces/nephews).   Our other friends are able to get a sitter or leave the kids with  the spouse but this one insists on always bringing her kid.    I give her enough notice to find a sitter or tell her it's "adult's only" but she doesn't get it.  I'd hate to stop inviting her, so I tell my BF that I'm going to call and remind her about our dinner plans this weekend and this is her response....
> "No don't remind her, you already told her and besides she is going to bring her little girl and I don't feel like hearing no kid acting up.  I want to
> enjoy my dinner, you know what I mean".
> 
> So I guess I'll need to be blunt with my friend and tell her not to bring her child, but I know how mothers can be overprotective so it's nothing against her child, I like the little girl but I want my friends attention.


Good Grief  I'm w/ your BFF, you did your part in letting her know there was a get together, no need to remind her.  If she can't remember . . . . 

You're so lucky to have a friend w/out kidlets and for 20 years to boot!  That's awesome!  I have a friend right now (she's 23 her DH is 30 I'm 33) who does not have children.  She had 2 miscarriages before I met her.  I think she'd be fine w/out having children but I'm pretty sure her DH wants them.  I'm just waiting for the annoucement that they're expecting.  Great for them but I've been upfront and honest w/ her.  We'll remain friends because I *DON'T* hate kids but when you have kids your life changes and so it's natural that our friendship would change.  No more last minute going out just because, no more late night dinners and drinks.  She'll be talking baby/kids because that's her life.  And that's O.K. it's just NOT my life.  Anyway, I've been pretty much upfront with her from the beginning that when that happens she can probably count on my pulling away.  I don't want to be tied down w/ her kids.  

I've been in that place before when ALL of my friends had kids.  I hated it(again, didn't hate the kids just the situation)!  We could never just go and hang out.  Sure, my friends thought that kids didn't slow them down but let's be honest.  Getting diaper bags ready, car seats situated, baby dressed. . . these things do slow you down and for a person w/out kids it gets tiresome.  

Anyway, I'm just rambling now.. .. . . .


----------



## Mozart

Hixski said:


> I had a glass of wine very early this am before I went to bed. (I work nights) It came out of a box if you are not a wine snob.



BOXED WINE?!?!?!?!  I tried that stuff once.

Notice I said "once."  Just don't see how anyone can drink that stuff.  Even an $4.99 bottle of junk from Bi-Lo is better than that.

But just out of curiousity...was it Franzia?


----------



## maddhatir

acm563 said:


> But anyway I just wanted to say I have appreciated the chuckles and if you ever see me at DW make sure you stop and say hello I will be the one without the screaming child



Welcome!

 I think we make a lot of people "laugh" and some without even trying 

I ALWAYS have my *Green Mickey *head on my handbag! The past 3 times I have been to Disney I have only seen 3 DISers! Well- 3 that actually came right up to me- some may see the green and be a little ..shy. I have never seen anyone with their green displayed- I even have it on my luggage- so say HI at the airport too! 

um, contrary to popular belief, you can come closer and talk to me- I won't devour or sacrifice your children


----------



## maddhatir

Mozart said:


> BOXED WINE?!?!?!?!  I tried that stuff once.
> 
> Notice I said "once."  Just don't see how anyone can drink that stuff.  Even an $4.99 bottle of junk from Bi-Lo is better than that.
> 
> But just out of curiousity...was it Franzia?



Believe it or not- I never like red wine until maybe 2 years ago- My SIL would buy those big JUG wines for parties and I tried one and thought- not bad. What did I know- I was not a red fan....yet!

That led me to try different types of reds until I pinpointed what it was that I really liked- one of my faves is Cartilidge & Browne Merlot. 

We had a party and someone brought over one of the jugs- we had it on the counter and one day I was making dinner and decided to pour a glass- it was Sangria- OMG It was SO sweet I dumped it out!

 That is pretty bad that I would rather _not_ get a buzz than to drink that 

OMG- when we were in Mexico- they cooked paella on the beach and served homemade Sangria! I skipped the paella being a veggie- so my tummy was nice and empty- I sucked down 3 glasses of the Sangria in about 10 minutes it was THAT good!

It was a bit amuzing trying to make it back to get my 3rd glass- I was just a tad bit....tipsy.....thank goodness we were steps away from where they were cooking.


----------



## acm563

maddhatir said:


> Welcome!
> 
> I think we make a lot of people "laugh" and some without even trying
> 
> I ALWAYS have my *Green Mickey *head on my handbag! The past 3 times I have been to Disney I have only seen 3 DISers! Well- 3 that actually came right up to me- some may see the green and be a little ..shy. I have never seen anyone with their green displayed- I even have it on my luggage- so say HI at the airport too!
> 
> um, contrary to popular belief, you can come closer and talk to me- I won't devour or sacrifice your children


Thanks, I keep forgetting to look for or have a lime green mickey or ribbon. I will have to make a mental note and get something to make that tomorrow and to remember to keep an eye open for it. I have the lime green luggage tags on my bags but have never noticed anyone else with them


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Welcome!
> 
> I think we make a lot of people "laugh" and some without even trying
> 
> I ALWAYS have my *Green Mickey *head on my handbag! The past 3 times I have been to Disney I have only seen 3 DISers! Well- 3 that actually came right up to me- some may see the green and be a little ..shy. I have never seen anyone with their green displayed- I even have it on my luggage- so say HI at the airport too!
> 
> *um, contrary to popular belief, you can come closer and talk to me- I won't devour or sacrifice your children*


  * And that's all i have to say cuz I have beer coming out my nose!*


----------



## maddhatir

acm563 said:


> Thanks, I keep forgetting to look for or have a lime green mickey or ribbon. I will have to make a mental note and get something to make that tomorrow and to remember to keep an eye open for it. I have the lime green luggage tags on my bags but have never noticed anyone else with them



 I have seen a few people with just some random green item on, thinking maybe it was a Diser- Have you ever watched the Colbert Report- When Stephen comes RUNNING out to the show's guest like a big dork- all dramatic

That is what I look like---"heeeeyyyyyyyyy a Diserrrrrr"- *running up to them* ......................

then "whoaaaaaaaa, just a green shirt, false alarm" *trying to pretend I just did not look stupid*


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> * And that's all i have to say cuz I have beer coming out my nose!*



Well Suzi and I MAY sacrifice your kids- b/c you _KNOWWWWW _we do like that devil worshipping music 

Marilyn Manson- umph she MUST be weird!


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Thought you might find this thread interesting:

http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1722947


----------



## maddhatir

Aunt Michelle said:


> Thought you might find this thread interesting:
> 
> http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1722947




_OH MY_! There are more of us out there! Oh well, there are just more of us to hate I guess 

Does anyone listen to Howard? When Artie does the.......
*whaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh* whine!


----------



## maddhatir

I been wanting to post this masterpiece-

Marilyn, Mickey and kitties! Who can ask for anything more!
(BTW- this is really his kitty!- yes, he loves cats)


----------



## acm563

maddhatir said:


> I have seen a few people with just some random green item on, thinking maybe it was a Diser- Have you ever watched the Colbert Report- When Stephen comes RUNNING out to the show's guest like a big dork- all dramatic
> 
> That is what I look like---"heeeeyyyyyyyyy a Diserrrrrr"- *running up to them* ......................
> 
> then "whoaaaaaaaa, just a green shirt, false alarm" *trying to pretend I just did not look stupid*


That sounds like something I would do....and lol...ya know I have these 44 year old eyes and believe me the sight IS the first thing to go


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Aunt Michelle said:


> Thought you might find this thread interesting:
> 
> http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1722947


Heeeeeeyyyyy, I posted on that thread    See me?  It says ForTheLoveofDisney right there!! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



OK, so I'm a little 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 But at least I'm not passin' my genes on.  

Ahhhem, where's that wine?


----------



## TheBina's

I can completely understand your issue. My husband and I have been together for 7 years. We were just married in November, we are fielding the questions now. People honestly think the answer is going to change. I have a new answer when people ask us When are you having kids? "When you have them and you raise them." We said we werent' having kids years ago. It is not something either of us want. I do have a question though, how did your husband get fixed? Dr's insist we are too young. We are both 27 and have been running into road block after road block. 

I am thrilled to be the best aunt and uncle with the best christmas presents and borrow the kids for a few hours and then return. I also enjoy traveling and taking vacations whenever we want...when we save up the money that is. lol
Thanks


----------



## maddhatir

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Heeeeeeyyyyy, I posted on that thread    See me?  It says ForTheLoveofDisney right there!!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> OK, so I'm a little
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> But at least I'm not passin' my genes on.
> 
> Ahhhem, where's that wine?



I saw you! We should invite some of them over "to the dark side" 

I have a sticker on my cycle helmet that discribes some people to the T!

"The gene pool needs a little chlorine" 

And guess what- It is NOT us CF people who are passin' those genes on- so I think some other people need to be worrying about themselves 

I would love to post a few more of my sticker sayings b/c they are just so freakin'.....true. 

I just did my shot of absinthe I have been waiting for all day- chillin' and watching hockey- life does not get much better that this--

Be back later.................


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

maddhatir said:


> I saw you! We should invite some of them over "to the dark side"
> 
> I have a sticker on my cycle helmet that discribes some people to the T!
> 
> "The gene pool needs a little chlorine"
> 
> And guess what- It is NOT us CF people who are passin' those genes on- so I think some other people need to be worrying about themselves
> 
> I would love to post a few more of my sticker sayings b/c they are just so freakin'.....true.
> 
> I just did my shot of absinthe I have been waiting for all day- chillin' and watching hockey- life does not get much better that this--
> 
> Be back later.................


  My DH saw this bumper sticker once and has used it several times it says:


----------



## maddhatir

TheBina's said:


> I have a new answer when people ask us When are you having kids? "When you have them and you raise them." We said we werent' having kids years ago. It is not something either of us want. I do have a question though, how did your husband get fixed? Dr's insist we are too young. We are both 27 and have been running into road block after road block.
> 
> I am thrilled to be the best aunt and uncle with the best christmas presents and borrow the kids for a few hours and then return. I also enjoy traveling and taking vacations whenever we want...when we save up the money that is. lol
> Thanks



I am sure they shut right up when you ask them to raise the kids they want YOU to have 

I guess you just need to find the right doc- I can't believe DH and I had no problem at all finding a doc- and never thought about it. He just went- and it was done. The doc never had a problem- 

As far as xmas presents- *I* have been told by one of my SILs that I am boring b/c I give all of our nieces and nephews savings bonds or cash for their accts! I told my one SIL who has 2 kids this- and she wrote me a little thank you note "from the kids" to DH and I _Thank you for thinking about our future_- SIL and BIL sure appreciate our gifts to the kids


----------



## Hixski

Mozart said:


> BOXED WINE?!?!?!?!  I tried that stuff once.
> 
> Notice I said "once."  Just don't see how anyone can drink that stuff.  Even an $4.99 bottle of junk from Bi-Lo is better than that.
> 
> But just out of curiousity...was it Franzia?



Franzia Crisp White!!! I am rather fond of it with my Egg McMuffins in the early am before I go to bed after work.


----------



## Hixski

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Heeeeeeyyyyy, I posted on that thread    See me?  It says ForTheLoveofDisney right there!!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> OK, so I'm a little
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> But at least I'm not passin' my genes on.
> 
> Ahhhem, where's that wine?



I posted on that thread too!!


----------



## danv3

plgrn said:


> Stay stay stay! I don't belong here either since I'm a fencesitter, but the gals *(and don't we have like 1 guy lurking?) *are nice enough to let me stay. It's for my sanity. The CB is scary and too controversial. Hang out with us and let's talk about travel, home projects, furbabies, and *gasp* IDEAS



One guy lurker checking in!  (And boy has this thread exploded in the couple of days since I last dropped in...)


----------



## WDWguru

Shyvioletisme said:


> thanks for the links..I'll check them out...
> 
> edit: I found 3 really good sounding prospects in my town! I'd really prefer this option as my Lestat is not a social cat and I think would really suffer in boarding. So thank you so much...I had no idea there were sites to search for pet sitters!!



That's great to hear! I hope one of them works out for you. When I interviewed my prospects I did some pre-interview questions via email or phone just to get a feel for how they do things, then met them with my dog to see how they act around animals. That gave away right away to the people who were just doing it as a temporary job and those who really care about animals and do it as a passion. Not that pet sitting is some kind of career aspiration for most people, but you can tell those who take it seriously and those who just see it as another job. I've had both types of sitters and those who are conscientious about it always make me feel more comfortable about being away. I know if something unexpected happens that they'll deal with it the way I would if I were here.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

danv3 said:


> One guy lurker checking in!  (And boy has this thread exploded in the couple of days since I last dropped in...)



Yes, well we got evicted. Then you nice folks asked some of us to move in here.    Nice folks here.


----------



## Hixski

Aunt Michelle said:


> Yes, well we got evicted. Then you nice folks asked some of us to move in here.    Nice folks here.



Yes, we have plenty of room for all of you to move in. It's not like everyone is moving in with 3 or 4 kids apiece. I don't think we would have room for you then.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Hixski said:


> Yes, we have plenty of room for all of you to move in. It's not like everyone is moving in with 3 or 4 kids apiece. I don't think we would have room for you then.



I am NOT


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hixski said:


> Yes, we have plenty of room for all of you to move in. It's not like everyone is moving in with 3 or 4 kids apiece. I don't think we would have room for you then.


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Well Suzi and I MAY sacrifice your kids- b/c you _KNOWWWWW _we do like that devil worshipping music
> 
> Marilyn Manson- umph she MUST be weird!


 
*Ah, but I listen to Slipknot, not Manson, and we all know they are a straight up group of wholesome lads..muwahahahaha Besides, you always carry steak sauce with you. A sure sign of trouble if you ask me! *



maddhatir said:


> I been wanting to post this masterpiece-
> 
> Marilyn, Mickey and kitties! Who can ask for anything more!
> (BTW- this is really his kitty!- yes, he loves cats)


*I'm a deeply traumatized by that image now  (I think the mouth has me freaked out the most  ) If the guy like cats that moves him way up on my list!! You gotta love his sense of humor!*



acm563 said:


> That sounds like something I would do....and lol...ya know I have these 44 year old eyes and believe me the sight IS the first thing to go


*Glad you're hanging with us!! You're dead right about sight being the first thing to go. I used to reach out for my husband first thing in the morning, now it's my glasses so I can find him.*



ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Ahhhem, where's that wine?


*That's it! Buying me a Box O Wine today to get me thru the weekend. And it's all your fault!*



Hixski said:


> Franzia Crisp White!!! I am rather fond of it with my Egg McMuffins in the early am before I go to bed after work.


 *Wine is made from fruit so this is an acceptable substitute for orange juice in my book!*


danv3 said:


> One guy lurker checking in! (And boy has this thread exploded in the couple of days since I last dropped in...)


*Great to see you here!! Hope we hear from you more! *


----------



## Suzibrat

Hixski said:


> Yes, we have plenty of room for all of you to move in. It's not like everyone is moving in with 3 or 4 kids apiece. I don't think we would have room for you then.


   *You crack me up!!!!  *

*Hope everyone is having a great morning. We are getting ready for a huge storm (again!!! Samantha, you going to get it too?) so I am off to go shopping and pick up the wine that has been paraded in front of me the last couple of days. After a few glasses I won't care what the weather is doing outside because everything will be rosey in my world. We are finally under 7 months for our trip. Sometimes it doesn't feel like it's ever going to happen but, patience grasshopper, it will.*
*Have a great day everyone!  *


----------



## PhotobearSam

Yup...MORE SNOW here too, CRAZY


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## Mozart

Hixski said:


> Yes, we have plenty of room for all of you to move in. It's not like everyone is moving in with 3 or 4 kids apiece. I don't think we would have room for you then.



Yes, but we have to figure out a way to keep all our dogs from chasing all the new cats moving in.

By the way, you guys do know that I am a guy as well, right?  Don't want you all referring to me as "she" like they do on the DCL boards.


----------



## Liisa

Mozart said:


> Yes, but we have to figure out a way to keep all our dogs from chasing all the new cats moving in.




I'll have to keep an eye on my Khabo - one of his favorite activities is "KITTY STOMPING".  That is why my poor cat now lives with my parents.  

Madd, DH and I are big fans of Shiraz as well. In particular, we enjoy the Rosemount Estates Shiraz.  

Now I just have to get through the work day so I can get home and have a couple of glasses.  Blast this work thing, always getting in the way!

Oh, and if we have to move because of all the extra people, can our next place have a pool and be located somewhere warm?     More snow tonight.  Brrrrrrrr


----------



## maddhatir

danv3 said:


> One guy lurker checking in!  (And boy has this thread exploded in the couple of days since I last dropped in...)





Mozart said:


> Yes, but we have to figure out a way to keep all our dogs from chasing all the new cats moving in.
> 
> By the way, you guys do know that I am a guy as well, right?  Don't want you all referring to me as "she" like they do on the DCL boards.



Hey guys!

Mozart- just curious- married or single- 

......and no need to worry about Manson's cat around the dogs! That little thing looks like he can "hold his own...and then some"


----------



## Mozart

maddhatir said:


> Hey guys!
> 
> Mozart- just curious- married or single-
> 
> ......and no need to worry about Manson's cat around the dogs! That little thing looks like he can "hold his own...and then some"



In April I will have been married for 11 years.

"Grandma's" are getting impatient.


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## PhotobearSam

Mozart said:


> In April I will have been married for 11 years.
> 
> "Grandma's" are getting impatient.



 Oh no you didn't just say that....


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## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *Ah, but I listen to Slipknot, not Manson, and we all know they are a straight up group of wholesome lads..muwahahahaha Besides, you always carry steak sauce with you. A sure sign of trouble if you ask me! *



yes- I KNOW Slipknot and ONLY Slipknot! All those "freaks" are the same! Don't ya love it when pea-brains speak  

I always get ewwwww- he is suck a _freeeeeak_- yeah- hello- have you ever heard him do an interview- he is MUCH more intelligent than you will EVER be 

So- Suzi- NO Disturbed- Pantera (_always_ gotta say RIP Dimebag when mentioning them )- Slayer- Rob Zombie- Godsmack (Sully )......OK- gotta love KORN! Gotta love Jonathan!- Please say you love Jonathan
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 I also like Throwdown and Hellyeah is OK.....

However- I can switch gears quickly and pop in some Hendrix or some Jethro Tull too!
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 I also looooooove Blues- but mostly Blues that really concentrate on the guitar- listening to an awesome guitarists to me is like, seeing god- (just for the record- I do no believe- I would say I side more with _Wiccan beliefs _than anything else- I WAS raised Catholic- but I am so not into the my religion is better than yours! )

Just curious what other bands you are into is all. _*And of course, anyone else here!!!!*_
All this talk I have to go listen to some SIRIUS Hard Attack Channel 27 to get my heart pumpin'!!!
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	





.


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## maddhatir

Mozart said:


> In April I will have been married for 11 years.
> 
> "Grandma's" are getting impatient.



Have you told the Grandma's..... "It's been 11 years--It's _not_ gonna happen!"


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Just stoppin' in to say Hey!

Just got back from lunch.  It was cool because going w/ my boss we took an hour and a half.  

I tried convincing TPTB that Christmas comes once a year EVERY year and we get off.  Leap Year Day only comes once every 4 years that should definately warrant a day off!  It didn't go over so well because as you can see, I'm still at work.  

Oh well.  But, I do get to go get a massage today right after so that's cool.  

What's everyone up to this weekend?  We just recently moved into a new (to us) house and it's been crazy.  First weekend we moved in, I was sick as a dog.  Second weekend I gave what I had to DH and he was sick as dog.  Last weekend DH had work to do on his vehicle.  KNOCK ON WOOD that this weekend we will really be able to get the new house organized.  OH, and in the midst of all that I just told you about we were living among construction/remodeling of a bathroom and laundry room (which still isn't done  ).

Madd::  I don't really know what type of music I like. Don't laugh but sometimes I like listening to 40's music.  I like old rock and roll but mainly I listen to talk radio of various subjects.  Now DH Loves, Loves, LOVES the blues!  I mean he knows artists and styles and history . . . He just loves the blues.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Mozart said:


> In April I will have been married for 11 years.
> 
> "Grandma's" are getting impatient.



See for me, conveniently I have two younger sisters and was raised Catholic. The Catholic sisters then married Catholic husbands which resulted in eight grandchildren. We all agree we have enough and my parents seem very happy to play grandparents to my felines. Do you blame them? The cats do not notice if they do not get presents!


----------



## maddhatir

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Madd::  I don't really know what type of music I like. Don't laugh but sometimes I like listening to 40's music.  I like old rock and roll but mainly I listen to talk radio of various subjects.  Now DH Loves, Loves, LOVES the blues!  I mean he knows artists and styles and history . . . He just loves the blues.



40s sounds cool- I like the 20s, Like when you walk in the lobby on the ToT- the music in the background is really cool!

But- Not sure if any of you ever check out this music site- 
http://www.live365.com/index.live (Live 365)
but they have everything and anything you can listen to on there! It does not cost anything and most of the stations are free! I think a lot of people here listen to the Disney station on there. You can probably find your 40's stuff there! 

Tell your DH they have a really good Blues station called _Bandit Blues Radio_- I listen to it most of the time- that, and believe it or not, Baroque.FM! I love baroque music! I think I may have hooked up woth Vivaldi in one of my lives! That kind of music makes me oddly emotional- you know, like you have "been" there before. It is not all classical- has to be baroque. 

I have odd tastes in music- If you can hear it on the radio on a daily basis- forget it- I don't want to hear it!- Can't stomach Rap or Country either. 

Now my metal music- I go to SIRIUS for that- #27. 

I can't tell you the last time I have listened to an AM/FM
radio- it is either satellite or internet.

I AM KICKING MYSELF TODAY!!!!!

FREAKIN' BB KING IS AT THE HOUSE OF BLUES IN ATLANTIC CITY!!! I Knew it way back when and I kept saying-- I don't know--- but NOW I WANNA GO! IT IS TOMORROW- 

WHO CAN GIVE UP A CHANCE TO SEE BB!!!! ME! THAT'S WHO!


----------



## Mozart

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> I like old rock and roll but mainly I listen to talk radio of various subjects.



My radio is always tuned to 104.9 THE DRIVE.  Seriously.

Besides, what other talk radio can you pick up over there?  When I lived there all you got was static from the Greenville AM stations.


----------



## Suzibrat

PhotobearSam said:


> Yup...MORE SNOW here too, CRAZY


*I feel for ya! I told DH that I wish we could take a week off and hit Florida right now!!!*


Mozart said:


> By the way, you guys do know that I am a guy as well, right? Don't want you all referring to me as "she" like they do on the DCL boards.


*I'm glad to see some guys hanging out with us!!!*



maddhatir said:


> yes- I KNOW Slipknot and ONLY Slipknot! All those "freaks" are the same! Don't ya love it when pea-brains speak
> 
> I always get ewwwww- he is suck a _freeeeeak_- yeah- hello- have you ever heard him do an interview- he is MUCH more intelligent than you will EVER be
> 
> So- Suzi- NO Disturbed- Pantera (_always_ gotta say RIP Dimebag when mentioning them )- Slayer- Rob Zombie- Godsmack (Sully )......OK- gotta love KORN! Gotta love Jonathan!- Please say you love Jonathan
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I also like Throwdown and Hellyeah is OK.....
> 
> However- I can switch gears quickly and pop in some Hendrix or some Jethro Tull too!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I also looooooove Blues- but mostly Blues that really concentrate on the guitar- listening to an awesome guitarists to me is like, seeing god- (just for the record- I do no believe- I would say I side more with _Wiccan beliefs _than anything else- I WAS raised Catholic- but I am so not into the my religion is better than yours! )
> 
> Just curious what other bands you are into is all. _*And of course, anyone else here!!!!*_
> All this talk I have to go listen to some SIRIUS Hard Attack Channel 27 to get my heart pumpin'!!!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> .


*Naw, I don't think Manson is a freak cuz one of his good buds is Joey, the drummer from Slipknot!   Joey was even in one of his videos. Manson is extremely well spoken!*
*Ok, here's what else I like Chimaira, Facecage, Wednesday 13, Dimmu Borgir (them satan lovin'men ya know )Lupara, (Love the vid for "No Pity On The Ants" that has Mick from Slipknot as the serial killer!) Amon Amarth, Diecast, and when I'm feeling mellow it's Stone Sour or the Murderdolls. Yes, I know that some of the members of Slipknot are in Stone Sour and Murderdolls but that's not why I listen. I love Death Metal and Black Metal..all that great growling that DH can't understand a word of  *
*I may be offline tomorrow because of the incoming storm. My internet is very picky about snow. Oh well, No matter. I got my Wine and my Jack and will have a good day nonetheless.  *


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *Naw, I don't think Manson is a freak cuz one of his good buds is Joey, the drummer from Slipknot!   Joey was even in one of his videos. Manson is extremely well spoken!
> Ok, here's what else I like Chimaira, Facecage, Wednesday 13, Dimmu Borgir (them satan lovin'men ya know )Lupara, (Love the vid for "No Pity On The Ants" that has Mick from Slipknot as the serial killer!) Amon Amarth, Diecast, and when I'm feeling mellow it's Stone Sour or the Murderdolls. Yes, I know that some of the members of Slipknot are in Stone Sour and Murderdolls but that's not why I listen. I love Death Metal and Black Metal..all that great growling that DH can't understand a word of
> I may be offline tomorrow because of the incoming storm. My internet is very picky about snow. Oh well, No matter. I got my Wine and my Jack and will have a good day nonetheless.  *


*

And don't forget Manson is friends with Mr Depp too! 

Wow- my music seems like Sinatra compared to your likes! That's cool! I do not get to see many videos- If I want to see something- I just go on YouTube.

Guess what? My brother was trying to get me to go to see Amon Amarth with him a few months back- He was telling me how great they were- I should have listened. 

I don't mind some of the death and black metal- I just like it CRUNCHY as I call it- But I am not crazy about just hearing some growling all the time-- and I can't hear any of the words. So not into some of the metal bands (like King Diamond) who have to hit the darn high note every 5 seconds- too girly for me- I would rather hear a growl, than a dude hitting a high note 

 OMG- One day I was listening to Howard (not sure if you listen) and Richard Christy from the show- he played drums for Iced Earth and a few other death, speed metal bands, anyway- he played this band who uses their DOG'S growls as vocals!!!!!!!

He played a clip and it was crazy! You could not tell the difference between a human or the dogs growls! I have NO idea who the band was- have you ever heard them??

Watch now I am listening to Hard Attack I will head some of your bands on there! 

Right now they are doing a tribute to Hellhammer- they say they pioneered black and death metal - they say they dis and rebanded as Celtic Frost Learn something new everyday*


----------



## WDWguru

For you guys who like the 40s music, have you checked out the Puppini Sisters? Their site (www.thepuppinisisters.com) takes forever to load but it's all done in 40s style, with pinup cards and everything. Their music is like the Andrews Sisters covering 70s and 80s hits! They do the coolest version of Walk Like an Egyptian! Definitely check them out if you like that kind of thing.


----------



## Suzibrat

*Mr Manson gets around! *
*Hellhammer rules \m/ (i thought you were talking about the drummer, Hellhammer, at first..he rules too!   LOL)**You missed Amon Amarth?? ACK!! bad girl! Brawny viking type dudes who totally kick butt and know how to twirl their hair!*
* I listen to Liquid Metal on Direct TV alot. We don't get any radio stations her except for one crackly country station so radio is out of the question for me. If you get a chance check out this Dimmu Borgir vid....I love it and you might like it too *
www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAmMcBQavKE
*Wow, how off topic can I get, huh? Sorry fellow board posters..I digress when the subject of music comes up! *


----------



## Suzibrat

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Just stoppin' in to say Hey!
> 
> Just got back from lunch. It was cool because going w/ my boss we took an hour and a half.
> 
> I tried convincing TPTB that Christmas comes once a year EVERY year and we get off. Leap Year Day only comes once every 4 years that should definately warrant a day off! It didn't go over so well because as you can see, I'm still at work.
> 
> Oh well. But, I do get to go get a massage today right after so that's cool.
> 
> What's everyone up to this weekend? We just recently moved into a new (to us) house and it's been crazy. First weekend we moved in, I was sick as a dog. Second weekend I gave what I had to DH and he was sick as dog. Last weekend DH had work to do on his vehicle. KNOCK ON WOOD that this weekend we will really be able to get the new house organized. OH, and in the midst of all that I just told you about we were living among construction/remodeling of a bathroom and laundry room (which still isn't done  ).
> 
> Madd:: I don't really know what type of music I like. Don't laugh but sometimes I like listening to 40's music. I like old rock and roll but mainly I listen to talk radio of various subjects. Now DH Loves, Loves, LOVES the blues! I mean he knows artists and styles and history . . . He just loves the blues.


*I totally missed your post until just now...I'm so sorry! I like your idea for a leap year holiday! DH has Friday's off during the winter season and I told him that he should have it off with pay today because it's a rare holiday  *
*Good luck with making progress this weekend with getting everything arranged. I hate moving with a passion and tend to draw out the unpacking over months and months instead of just getting it done. *
*Since your DH loves blues have you ever gone to House of Blues? We plan to go in October, for my DH, not for me. I'm hoping they might have a good show going on that night so I keep checking their calender as well as the Disney one...all this calender watching! Yeesh!*
*I'm spending the weekend in the house watching the snowfall and not much more than that. Hope you have a good one!*


----------



## zima-cheryl

So tomorrow we are off to sunny Cancun (assuming the snow here in the NE doesn't mess up our flights).

The absolute *WORST* part of vacation is taking the baby to the "spa".
I'm so lame...I cry when I drop her off at the kennel. 

And today she was all upset, and jumping up and didn't want me to go.
I feel like such an awful "mommy" right now!   

I called to check on her & they said she settled right down when I left.  And I know she will be fine.  They just love her, and they spoil her rotten.  But even so right now I feel horrible.  

http://www.doyouwanticecream.com/webpix/ginger1.JPG

I miss my baby!  Poor DH will hear that for the first 2 or 3 days of vacation.
Thank goodness he is a patient man.


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *Mr Manson gets around! *
> *Hellhammer rules \m/ (i thought you were talking about the drummer, Hellhammer, at first..he rules too!   LOL)**You missed Amon Amarth?? ACK!! bad girl! Brawny viking type dudes who totally kick butt and know how to twirl their hair!*
> * I listen to Liquid Metal on Direct TV alot. We don't get any radio stations her except for one crackly country station so radio is out of the question for me. If you get a chance check out this Dimmu Borgir vid....I love it and you might like it too *
> www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAmMcBQavKE
> *Wow, how off topic can I get, huh? Sorry fellow board posters..I digress when the subject of music comes up! *



I will check it out- Thanks!

and guess what- we have always been OT over on this CF thread- every once in a while we would comment about some bizzarre child/parent sotry of the day however, most of the time we would just talk about......life.....

I like the \m/ had to stare at it for a while and then I was like.....ahhhhhh- I see it!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> So tomorrow we are off to sunny Cancun (assuming the snow here in the NE doesn't mess up our flights).
> 
> The absolute *WORST* part of vacation is taking the baby to the "spa".
> I'm so lame...I cry when I drop her off at the kennel.
> 
> And today she was all upset, and jumping up and didn't want me to go.
> I feel like such an awful "mommy" right now!
> 
> I called to check on her & they said she settled right down when I left.  And I know she will be fine.  They just love her, and they spoil her rotten.  But even so right now I feel horrible.
> 
> http://www.doyouwanticecream.com/webpix/ginger1.JPG
> 
> I miss my baby!  Poor DH will hear that for the first 2 or 3 days of vacation.
> Thank goodness he is a patient man.



OMG It's time already!!!! 

Have SO much fun! Like I have to say that- you are going to Mexico- 

REMEMBER! TRY and get to the La Isla Shopping Center- you will NOT be disappointed! Take the bus- no big deal!

....and take pics! I LOVE Cancun! I am jealous!


----------



## Suzibrat

zima-cheryl said:


> So tomorrow we are off to sunny Cancun (assuming the snow here in the NE doesn't mess up our flights).
> 
> The absolute *WORST* part of vacation is taking the baby to the "spa".
> I'm so lame...I cry when I drop her off at the kennel.
> 
> And today she was all upset, and jumping up and didn't want me to go.
> I feel like such an awful "mommy" right now!
> 
> I called to check on her & they said she settled right down when I left. And I know she will be fine. They just love her, and they spoil her rotten. But even so right now I feel horrible.
> 
> http://www.doyouwanticecream.com/webpix/ginger1.JPG
> 
> I miss my baby! Poor DH will hear that for the first 2 or 3 days of vacation.
> Thank goodness he is a patient man.


 
*Have a great vaca and hopefully you won't have any travel issues because of the weather! Try not to worry about the "baby" even though I know she'll be on your mind alot! I totally understand that feeling!*



maddhatir said:


> I will check it out- Thanks!
> 
> and guess what- we have always been OT over on this CF thread- every once in a while we would comment about some bizzarre child/parent sotry of the day however, most of the time we would just talk about......life.....
> 
> I like the \m/ had to stare at it for a while and then I was like.....ahhhhhh- I see it!


*Whew! Glad to know I can go off into left field every now and then! I knew you'd figure out the \m/ !!! *


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> I am jealous!



How can you be jealous?  You just got back; like 2 weeks ago!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> How can you be jealous?  You just got back; like 2 weeks ago!



No! I got back from Riviera Maya Mexico! 1.5 hours from Cancun- I do love the people of Mexico, But....

I especially LOVE Cancun! That is where I prefer to be! 

PS- Suzi- I am listening to Hard Attack and I hear this song and thinking- this is really mellow to be on this station!....what's the deal?? Who was it???  STONE SOUR!


----------



## Hixski

zima-cheryl said:


> So tomorrow we are off to sunny Cancun (assuming the snow here in the NE doesn't mess up our flights).
> 
> The absolute *WORST* part of vacation is taking the baby to the "spa".
> I'm so lame...I cry when I drop her off at the kennel.
> 
> And today she was all upset, and jumping up and didn't want me to go.
> I feel like such an awful "mommy" right now!
> 
> I called to check on her & they said she settled right down when I left.  And I know she will be fine.  They just love her, and they spoil her rotten.  But even so right now I feel horrible.
> 
> http://www.doyouwanticecream.com/webpix/ginger1.JPG
> 
> I miss my baby!  Poor DH will hear that for the first 2 or 3 days of vacation.
> Thank goodness he is a patient man.




Have a great time on vacation! Please catch a few rays of sun for me! My tan has been gone since November. It is sunny and 56 here right now. I can feel spring around the corner.


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> PS- Suzi- I am listening to Hard Attack and I hear this song and thinking- this is really mellow to be on this station!....what's the deal?? Who was it??? STONE SOUR!


*Name of song? Some lyrics from it?? My crystal ball is terribly clouded due to incoming snow at the moment so I can't tell what you are listening too   *


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Hixski said:


> Have a great time on vacation! Please catch a few rays of sun for me! My tan has been gone since November. It is sunny and 56 here right now. I can feel spring around the corner.



Your tan??  What the heck is a tan?


----------



## Hixski

Aunt Michelle said:


> Your tan??  What the heck is a tan?



You know, that thing where your skin gets that lovely golden brown color!  After a whole spring and summer of playing golf, swimming and then the DCL cruise in September I had quite the tan. But alas, poof it goes away.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Hixski said:


> You know, that thing where your skin gets that lovely golden brown color!  After a whole spring and summer of playing golf, swimming and then the DCL cruise in September I had quite the tan. But alas, poof it goes away.



Ahh.. yes, I vaguely know what you are talking about.. I might have experienced once, maybe twice. The reality is, all the "fair" genes that my parents could contribute to their offspring's DNA for some reason ended up in my strand. Half the year I stay ghostly white...  the other half, usually I look like a lobster waiting to fade to ghostly white


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *Mr Manson gets around! *
> *Hellhammer rules \m/ (i thought you were talking about the drummer, Hellhammer, at first..he rules too!   LOL)**You missed Amon Amarth?? ACK!! bad girl! Brawny viking type dudes who totally kick butt and know how to twirl their hair!*
> * I listen to Liquid Metal on Direct TV alot. We don't get any radio stations her except for one crackly country station so radio is out of the question for me. If you get a chance check out this Dimmu Borgir vid....I love it and you might like it too *
> www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAmMcBQavKE
> *Wow, how off topic can I get, huh? Sorry fellow board posters..I digress when the subject of music comes up! *



You can lsten to Live365 though the internet! Just say no to sucky radio stations in your house!

I watched the video!  my review of the video-
Music A
Singing C+ 

I don't think I would be able to listen to his voice over and over like on a CD and did not like in the middle of the video when they all broke out in what sounded like "joyous song" Their look was cool- You like the "theatrical" look it seems- Do they dress like that in concert??? 

I think I am into a more old school raw-angry sound like Pantera. I know they are not around anymore- but I try and find music like that- 

I find it ironic peoples that this is one of my FAVORITE Pantera songs- I can just keep hitting repeat on my CD and play this song over and over-  Take a listen-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONZ9bL2WGBE

An old Slayer classic- South of Heaven.....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwLtTa2trRs&feature=related


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *Name of song? Some lyrics from it?? My crystal ball is terribly clouded due to incoming snow at the moment so I can't tell what you are listening too   *



Sorry- I just looked real fast and saw their name!

EEEk- bad, bad music listener!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> You know, that thing where your skin gets that lovely golden brown color!  After a whole spring and summer of playing golf, swimming and then the DCL cruise in September I had quite the tan. But alas, poof it goes away.



No, no no, girls! Come on- you go to your local shopping center and IN the shopping center your BOUND to find a place called a tanning salon- you fork over about 150.00 for a tanning package- you see, you PAY to get the skin cancer- but you can look good all year-round!

That is how it works!


----------



## Hixski

Aunt Michelle said:


> Ahh.. yes, I vaguely know what you are talking about.. I might have experienced once, maybe twice. The reality is, all the "fair" genes that my parents could contribute to their offspring's DNA for some reason ended up in my strand. Half the year I stay ghostly white...  the other half, usually I look like a lobster waiting to fade to ghostly white



Funny how that works. My mother is English, Irish and Native American. She has the ghostly white skin of the Irish but looks somewhat Native American with almost black hair. My father is half Polish and half French. The French side was from the Mediterranean area so they are dark like most Italian folks. So my father gets very dark and also has almost black hair.

I got the reddish blonde hair with the dark tan and very dark brown almost black eyes. Nobody can figure out what nationality I am. I just tell them I'm a mutt.

My eyes are the same color as Johnny Depps. Maybe he is my long lost cousin or something.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Hixski said:


> Funny how that works. My mother is English, Irish and Native American. She has the ghostly white skin of the Irish but looks somewhat Native American with almost black hair. My father is half Polish and half French. The French side was from the Mediterranean area so they are dark like most Italian folks. So my father gets very dark and also has almost black hair.
> 
> I got the reddish blonde hair with the dark tan and very dark brown almost black eyes. Nobody can figure out what nationality I am. I just tell them I'm a mutt.
> 
> My eyes are the same color as Johnny Depps. Maybe he is my long lost cousin or something.



And by "cousin" you mean...


----------



## Hixski

Madd and Suzi: You guys are way over my head in terms of heavy metal music. My tastes tend to run to the classic rock heavy metal. Zepplin, AC/DC, Sabbath and Ozzy.....you get the drift. I have listened to some you were naming but most I have never heard of. Lordy, I sound like my parents now.......I must be getting old. SHHHHH!!


----------



## Hixski

Aunt Michelle said:


> And by "cousin" you mean...



Just be nice to have him in the family. If for no other reason than just to look at him. Of course then it would be weird having the hots for your cousin so nevermind. I'm starting to hear the music from Deliverance.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

madd was asking about tastes in music...so here's the short story on the really ecclectic taste both DH and I share..
punk/ska, goth/industrial, alt rock, mid 90s college rock, INDIE!!! and the list seems to go on...we're Big fans of the Smiths/Morrissey, the cure, siouxsie sioux, matt nathanson, ingrid michaelson, of montreal, bright eyes, AFI, bowling for soup, rancid, flogging molly, garbage, moby...gosh we have a lot of favorites...when we first moved in together and combined our cd collections we had almost 5000 cds...I think we are down to a measly 3000 now...lol.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Man...I feel like if I tell you guys what kind of music I like, you will throw me off the thread.


----------



## Hixski

PhotobearSam said:


> Man...I feel like if I tell you guys what kind of music I like, you will throw me off the thread.



Well.....don't leave us hanging......spit it out girl!!! You've been here too long to throw you off!!!! We can all play nice in the sandbox. We will just have different tunes on our IPOD's.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

PhotobearSam said:


> Man...I feel like if I tell you guys what kind of music I like, you will throw me off the thread.



I was SO thinking the same thing.  I'll tell if you do..  you go first!


----------



## Aunt Michelle

hmmm...  a bit lead footed in the submit button tonight.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Here goes...


For music I like Duran Duran, anything 80's,* Nickelback,* 3 Doors Down, The Wallflowers, Finger Eleven, Daughtry, Kelly Clarkson, Barenaked Ladies, Robbie Williams (he's so hot), Lifehouse, Old Loverboy, Rick Springfield, ELVIS, some Country like Garth Brooks,  and things like Josh Groban and Anthony Callea.


I am ready for my banishment...


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Most 70's and 80's - Sir Elton John, Billy Joel, The Police, Yes, Steeley Dan, Bon Jovi, Bob Seger, James Taylor, Carly Simon, Carole King - 

Everybody still awake?? 

I like Country, old and new, and "smooth Jazz" like the Rippingtons, Chick Corea, David Lanz.  

Should I pack my bags?


----------



## Hixski

PhotobearSam said:


> Here goes...
> 
> 
> For music I like Duran Duran, anything 80's,* Nickelback,* 3 Doors Down, The Wallflowers, Finger Eleven, Daughtry, Kelly Clarkson, Barenaked Ladies, Robbie Williams (he's so hot), Lifehouse, Old Loverboy, Rick Springfield, ELVIS, some Country like Garth Brooks,  and things like Josh Groban and Anthony Callea.
> 
> 
> I am ready for my banishment...





Aunt Michelle said:


> Most 70's and 80's - Sir Elton John, Billy Joel, The Police, Yes, Steeley Dan, Bon Jovi, Bob Seger, James Taylor, Carly Simon, Carole King -
> 
> Everybody still awake??
> 
> I like Country, old and new, and "smooth Jazz" like the Rippingtons, Chick Corea, David Lanz.
> 
> Should I pack my bags?



I'm good with it but you might need to ask our resident "queens of metal darkness"!! I'm sure they won't kick you off the island!!


----------



## Suzibrat

Hixski said:


> I'm good with it but you might need to ask our resident "queens of metal darkness"!! I'm sure they won't kick you off the island!!


*"Queens Of Metal Darkness" I like that!!!!! No one gets kicked off the island around here! Just like a Disney Resort there are different buildings and we each have one of our own that houses our own tastes and preferences, right?*


Aunt Michelle said:


> Most 70's and 80's - Sir Elton John, Billy Joel, The Police, Yes, Steeley Dan, Bon Jovi, Bob Seger, James Taylor, Carly Simon, Carole King -
> 
> Everybody still awake??
> 
> I like Country, old and new, and "smooth Jazz" like the Rippingtons, Chick Corea, David Lanz.
> 
> Should I pack my bags?


*Do not pack your bags, do not pass go, do not collect $200.  What you like to listen to is your preference. I know everyone isn't into my metal stuff. Most people aren't Heck, even Mad said that what she listens to is like Sinatra compared to what I listen to.  It's interesting to know what everyone else likes. Doesn't make anyone right or wrong.*



PhotobearSam said:


> Here goes...
> 
> 
> For music I like Duran Duran, anything 80's,* Nickelback,* 3 Doors Down, The Wallflowers, Finger Eleven, Daughtry, Kelly Clarkson, Barenaked Ladies, Robbie Williams (he's so hot), Lifehouse, Old Loverboy, Rick Springfield, ELVIS, some Country like Garth Brooks, and things like Josh Groban and Anthony Callea.
> 
> 
> I am ready for my banishment...


*Hey! I'm not like that!!! I don't care what anyone else listens to...as long as I don't have to listen to it!  And just so ya know, DH is into James Taylor and Jackson Brown! I spend a great deal of time with my headphones on when he's home so I don't torture the poor guy. Back in the day I did listen to Duran Duran...remember, my cat's name is "Rio"  Then I found my death metal and took a turn for the worst  *


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *"Queens Of Metal Darkness" I like that!!!!! No one gets kicked off the island around here! Just like a Disney Resort there are different buildings and we each have one of our own that houses our own tastes and preferences, right?*



Well first off- as you ALL know- we can NOT tell anyone you can't stay! 

ITA with Suzi! My friends all think I am crazy for the music I listen to- It kind of stinks that you do not have a "bud" to listen to the music you like DH -likes- it but will not pop a CD in to listen to it- but if I have it on- he listens. AND most importantly- If I insist on seeing a band- he does go with me! I do not have anyone to talk to about my music either-

But I find new bands just by listening to Hard Attack or other metal stations- I may be kicked off the island b/c guess what!? 2 things! 1- I do not even HAVE and IPOD! and get ready for THIS one- ..........I am a closet Neil Diamond fan   I swear!!! There is something about some of his music that makes me  happy 

My SIL loooooves Stevie Nicks- I am SO not a fan- but I went to the concert anyway..she had a great time, we sat on the lawn and......chilled  so all was good for me But- you know another reason I went (a bit selfish reason, but that is why I am on THIS board, I am a slefish person ) Chris Isaak opened up for her. I LOVE Chris Isaak! NOT b/c his corny video of the woman tossing around in the sand and he is looking all sexy 

It is just all of his music is good- Baja Sessions is incredible if you have not heard it yet- get it. Very islandy feel. And he has the BEST and most FUNNIEST personality EVER- you wold not expect that from someone as adorable as he is- but during is concerts (yes, we have seen him a few times) he tells the most hilariuos stories- and he is the kind of guy who laughs at himself!

He looks like Elvis in the darn suits he wears and he knows they are goofy- that's what makes it the best 

So- diversity makes the world go round- and I don't mind! 

*But deep down I will always be a* "Queen of Metal Darkness" 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




 Love it!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> I am a closet Neil Diamond fan   I swear!!! There is something about some of his music that makes me  happy



DH came home from work one day waaaaayyy back in the 80's and said his boss had given him 2 extra tickets to Neil Diamond. All I could think is how I was going to be sooo embarrassed going to Neil Diamond. We were just in our 20's and I thought we would be the only ones there our age. Well, we were about the youngest but he really did put on a good concert. So along with my Zeppelin, AC/DC and other concerts I got to add Neil Diamond.

Glad you and Suzi like my "queens of metal darkness". It just popped into my head.......late night at work......mind is wandering.....you get the drift. I am the queen of Christmas ornaments but that is a whole nother ballgame!!


----------



## PhotobearSam

I have started a NEW thread for when we are not talking about Being Childless but fr everything else...


Anyone want to join?
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?p=23529195#post23529195

I am going to stay clear of the community board for a while...It just gets me slammed elsewhere...


----------



## LisaZee

I have very "eclectic" tastes when it comes to music.  I am a die-hard hair band fan - Motley Crue are the loves of my life!    But I love ALL hair metal - I will have to post my pic of me and Jani Lane from Warrant.     I also love cheezy pop music.  Gasp - right now I am listening to Britney's new CD.  And I have Paris Hilton's CD on my iPod, too.   I see we have a lot of Neil Diamond fans here - awesome.  I am more of a "Fan-ilow", however.     I also like 80's music - did anyone see Rick Springfield on Oprah the other day?  He was my first concert, in 1985 with Corey Hart (I wear my sunglasses at night!  )  I have all Rick's albums on vinyl...  sigh...  

Now, let me find that Jani Lane pic!


----------



## LisaZee




----------



## maddhatir

LisaZee said:


> I have very "eclectic" tastes when it comes to music.  I am a die-hard hair band fan - Motley Crue are the loves of my life!    But I love ALL hair metal - I will have to post my pic of me and Jani Lane from Warrant.     I also love cheezy pop music.  Gasp - right now I am listening to Britney's new CD.  And I have Paris Hilton's CD on my iPod, too.   I see we have a lot of Neil Diamond fans here - awesome.  I am more of a "Fan-ilow", however.     I also like 80's music - did anyone see Rick Springfield on Oprah the other day?  He was my first concert, in 1985 with Corey Hart (I wear my sunglasses at night!  )  I have all Rick's albums on vinyl...  sigh...
> 
> Now, let me find that Jani Lane pic!



Yup- She's my Cherry Pie 

You sound like my cousin (male) he loves the big hair bands. He will travel all over to see them play. 

Hey- in the 80s I had Motley Crue posters plastered all over my walls- I have seen them so many times in concert (back in the day when they would sell out 20,000+ seats) I lost track! I used to be a fan of Ratt, Poison, Cinderella, Whitesnake- all of those kinds of bands, until! One day- I hear.......

Metallica! I have never been the same since 

Well, needless to say- I never looked back at the big hair bands, I moved on to bands like,  Megadeth, Slayer (never gave up Ozzy though ) Suicial Tendencies, Exodus, Anthrax, Testament.....and I still like the loud crazy metal.

When my cousin tells me about a big hair concert he is going to (now they usually draw 500 people ) I say, you dope- You could have went to ALL of those concerts with us (we are the same age) back in the day when we would sit only a few rows from the stage in the 80s (dad was good friends with a ticket broker) and they would all sell out wherever they were playing.......... but you missed the bus man!

Actually my cousin is going to the Soul game tonight- the Soul is Bon Jovi's indoor football team. He was just a town over a few days ago cutting the ribbon on their new "venue"- actually it is an old building- it is where the Phila. Flyers used to practice until they got some new digs. That is the Soul's new home.


----------



## PhotobearSam

LisaZee said:


>






I love it...you look so cute...I love their song "I Saw Red" I really likes them way back in my youth...I also was listening to Dr. Feelgood album yesterday...I Like the Crue...


God, I feel old...


----------



## maddhatir

I changed my siggy- Thanks Hix! 

But I think my Harley symbol is chopped off a bit- gotta see what I can do 'bout that!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Metallica! I have never been the same since



I tell DH he is so weird. He loves Metallica!!! But then he turns around and is listening to country!! Now that is just not right!!!!!



PhotobearSam said:


> I love it...you look so cute...I love their song "I Saw Red" I really likes them way back in my youth...I also was listening to Dr. Feelgood album yesterday...I Like the Crue...
> 
> 
> God, I feel old...



Honey, you are not old!!! I have been going to concerts since 1976 when I was 16. Ahhhhh........the seventies.......you would have had to live them to know what I mean.    



maddhatir said:


> I changed my siggy- Thanks Hix!
> 
> But I think my Harley symbol is chopped off a bit- gotta see what I can do 'bout that!



Glad you like it!!!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hey, whad up my peeps?  

Well, I am thrilled to say that I got through the boxes in the kitchen today!!  WOOO-HOOOO  It has been a mess for over a month (you know, the whole moving in thing).

I'm still not quite done but I needed a break so here I am.  Hi. 


Mozart said:


> My radio is always tuned to 104.9 THE DRIVE.  Seriously.
> 
> Besides, what other talk radio can you pick up over there?  When I lived there all you got was static from the Greenville AM stations.


 We have XM Radio so I can usually find something interesting to listen to.



WDWguru said:


> For you guys who like the 40s music, have you checked out the Puppini Sisters? Their site (www.thepuppinisisters.com) takes forever to load but it's all done in 40s style, with pinup cards and everything. Their music is like the Andrews Sisters covering 70s and 80s hits! They do the coolest version of Walk Like an Egyptian! Definitely check them out if you like that kind of thing.


Liked the Puppini Sisters!  Thanks for sharing.  



Aunt Michelle said:


> Ahh.. yes, I vaguely know what you are talking about.. I might have experienced once, maybe twice. The reality is, all the "fair" genes that my parents could contribute to their offspring's DNA for some reason ended up in my strand. Half the year I stay ghostly white...  the other half, usually I look like a lobster waiting to fade to ghostly white


 Are we related?  I'm a red-haired, fair skinned damsel myself.  My sister, on the other hand, got all the indian (native american to be P.C.) genes and tans in mere minutes.



PhotobearSam said:


> Man...I feel like if I tell you guys what kind of music I like, you will throw me off the thread.


Uuum, did you not see where I admitted to listening to 40's music?   



maddhatir said:


> ..........I am a closet Neil Diamond fan   I swear!!! There is something about some of his music that makes me  happy


Sweet Caroline --duh, duh, duh duuuuuh -- Good times never seemed so good . . . . 


Well, I better get back at it.  I really want to get it done tonight.

Talk to you soon.


----------



## maddhatir

Click!
http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/clickToGive/home.faces?siteId=3

_Hello, all you animal lovers. This is pretty simple. 

Please tell ten (or more) friends to tell ten today! The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily to meet their quota of getting free food donated every day to abused and neglected animals. 

It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on "feed an animal in need" for free. It's in a purple box in the middle of the page. This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising. 

Pass it along to people you know_


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> Click!
> http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/clickToGive/home.faces?siteId=3
> 
> _Hello, all you animal lovers. This is pretty simple.
> 
> Please tell ten (or more) friends to tell ten today! The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily to meet their quota of getting free food donated every day to abused and neglected animals.
> 
> It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on "feed an animal in need" for free. It's in a purple box in the middle of the page. This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising.
> 
> Pass it along to people you know_






I AM CLICKING AWAY....Keep reminding me and I will keep doing it.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

I'm clicking!  Cats are clicking!


----------



## PhotobearSam

Aunt Michelle said:


> I'm clicking!  Cats are clicking!




Just keep clicking...Just keep clicking...Just keep Clicking sung in a Dory voice


----------



## maddhatir

Reason for this post.....Just watching Flyers vs Rangers and......

I know some of us here are hockey fans aka PUCK bunnies
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




but have not seen a lot of our regular bunnies around in a while! 

...........Anyway I see this commercial all the time when watching the Flyers games-

It is so funny- I cannot relate to the parent and the nursery But I just love the hockey analogy! 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EG6orPtnhdY

and the only thing this next one has to do with hockey is, I see it all the time while watching the games and PEE my pants it's so funny!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWgbMJZupGM&feature=related

Has anyone seen either of them?


----------



## TXTurtles

Fantastic commercials.  Better than the Superbowl ones, though that's not hard.

And just enjoying the child-free air for the moment.  My younger brother has, for some reason, decided that DH and I would be too good of parents to, well, not be.  And, since we can't claim that we're not having kids for the kids' sakes (see above decision which I seriously think is insane - I put my fish through enough torture trying to teach him tricks ... perfectionist, anyone?) he gently insinuated that we're selfish for not increasing the population.  Well, yes, I will be the first to admit that we don't have kids because we don't want to give up our childless ways ... but so?  Many people have kids because they don't want to give up their dream of a 2.5 kid family.  I fail to see how that's any better or worse.  And anyway, this is the li'l bro that I, for all practical purposes, raised (including teaching him to drive ) so, well, I've done my part for the human race of the next generation.  On the good side, he's one of only three people in the world that can be that level with me and the levelness itself not be insulting - on the other hand, what kinda person did I raise???  His one defense - he's my only sib so me not having kids shoves the pressure of grandkids off on him.  Of course, between his driving and bagpipe lessons, I figure we're even ... but still.  Anyway, after being equally level with him and tearing apart his entire argument (hey, the levelness goes both ways, kid) I feel better but still a little frustrated.  AM I a selfish person?  Er, more specifically, am I selfish in an area that I shouldn't be?  Fortunately Fish is shaking his head at me (I think he's actually asking for food, but I'll take what I can get) and making me feel better.  Besides DH spoils the fish rotten (you didn't think fish could be spoiled did you?  Just wait until we get a dog or cat - it'll be entirely up to me to train it and DH will just sit there feeding it from the table.  I can see it already) so any kids around here would have bipolar parents, one of which expects military discipline and one that lets them get away with murder.  Yeah, definitely not a good idea.  We should stick to raising things that don't get a vote in our government's future.  Ok, feeling better.

Any more good commercials?


----------



## maddhatir

TXTurtles said:


> Fantastic commercials.  Better than the Superbowl ones, though that's not hard.
> 
> AM I a selfish person?
> 
> Any more good commercials?



Mom was telling me about this commercial http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUcJuR_aqTs today and I had to check it out on You Tube- it IS from the Superbowl but I am SO not a fan of football so I missed it- Not only that we were in Mexico during the Superbowl so we had an excuse NOT to watch 

Oh the million dollar question- ARE you selfish- to answer the question about MYSELF- #ELL YEAH I am selfish! So what!? 

That is exactly why I do not have kids. And I know it. 

Well not only that- There is NO way I would want to take any of my attention away from DH- I love giving him *any and all *the attention I can- he does not demand it or expect it, I just love giving it all to him. 

We enjoy each other's company and I cannot see a 3rd (4th,  or 5th) person _interfering_ with that. He feels the same exact way. 

We are lucky we both agree- not a lot of couples can say that- and that is where the trouble begins.


----------



## Hixski

I hate the selfish comments!! Who gets to decide just what is selfish?? 

I see comments from parents saying "I would like to have a 3rd (or 4th or 5th) child and my DH is just not quite on board". It gets debated with responses ranging from "just go ahead and have another your DH will come around" to "be careful I had a friend who "accidently" got pregnant with the next one they wanted and their marriage was over from the mistrust". Most people are reasonable about it but so many of the comments sound sooo selfish to me. It is all "I want, I am not finished with my family, I need to get DH on board. The comments all seem to be about "I, I, I, me, me, me".

So again just what is selfish?? Some of the people calling us selfish might take a good long look at themselves. People can be selfish in a variety of ways.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Well not only that- There is NO way I would want to take any of my attention away from DH- I love giving him *any and all *the attention I can- he does not demand it or expect it, I just love giving it all to him.
> 
> We enjoy each other's company and I cannot see a 3rd (4th,  or 5th) person _interfering_ with that. He feels the same exact way.
> 
> We are lucky we both agree- not a lot of couples can say that- and that is where the trouble begins.



This is exactly how I feel. I enjoy being married to my husband and knowing him as such.


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> This is exactly how I feel. I enjoy being married to my husband and knowing him as such.



Of course, I _LOVE_ my husband- AND I actually* LIKE *my husband enough that I like being in his company all the time

I think I would _resent_ anyone that came between us- even if it was a child. But like I keep saying- we BOTH knew this not long after we met - I would not want to have a child and resent it!


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *Dimmu Borgir (them satan lovin'men ya know *



Sorry to keep bringing up the music, but,

I am sitting here DISing and have Hard Attack on my laptop playing away, then, all of a sudden......I hear this cool song.....I *NEED* to know who is singing this song-

Maxed my SIRIUS screen to see.....and its *DIMMU BORGIR*- _Burn in #ell_!!!! 

That song was pretty cool!


----------



## tink8jr

maddhatir said:


> Click!
> http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/clickToGive/home.faces?siteId=3
> 
> _Hello, all you animal lovers. This is pretty simple.
> 
> Please tell ten (or more) friends to tell ten today! The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily to meet their quota of getting free food donated every day to abused and neglected animals.
> 
> It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on "feed an animal in need" for free. It's in a purple box in the middle of the page. This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising.
> 
> Pass it along to people you know_



I go to that site everyday and click for everything, there is also a new site animalattraction.com for pet lovers, everytime you log in it donates a penny to your charity.



Now about having kids I respect people who are mature enough to say I don't want to have kids to many people have children just to have them, or they didn't mean to get prego and the child suffers, I speak from first hand experience I love my boys ages 6 and 9 they mean the world to me and I was a very selfish person until they came along and forever changed my life, My hubby now they are his bio kids, I am in the process of adopting them, the baby was 18 mths when he came to live with me and the oldest was five, my hubby and now ex wife had broken up gotten back together and the five year old had gone through this most of his life, I know because I knew her in school and she has told me all of this, she should have never had children, after me and hubby got together she kept them for two weeks then we had them and she quit coming to get them all together about three months into the relationship my baby doesn't even know her. She has not seen either of them in over three and a half years... she use to leave the baby in his crib all day, he always came back home raw and sick, the oldest got up one night at her apt and she was gone to a party he was FIVE and the baby was 20 MTHS she emotional abused the five year old made him go hungry, told him she would have another baby to replace him if he wanted me to be his mom etc... He only trust me now I have him in therapy, he also suffers from depression b/c of all this but he is getting better and feeling better everyday and I am thankful for that the baby hasn't been effected b/c I am all he knows  , anyways she has moved away now and gone to prison, drugs, alcohol etc... she signed her rights over in Nov YAY I have been waiting forever to adopt them. I found out the month after she signed over her rights that she is having another BABY!!! some people never learn and I just feel sorry for that baby. To many people have kids just to have them, not everyone is suppose to be a parent, So I feel if you don't want kids don't have them that is your choice and you are being a responsible adult everyone else needs to mind there business and worry about there on life, not why do you have four kids, or two or one or none! My question to those people is why do you need to know?


----------



## maddhatir

tink8jr said:


> her. She has not seen either of them in over three and a half years... she use to leave the baby in his crib all day, he always came back home raw and sick, the oldest got up one night at her apt and she was gone to a party he was FIVE and the baby was 20 MTHS she emotional abused the five year old made him go hungry, told him she would have another baby to replace him if he wanted me to be his mom etc...



I can only respond with this.......Whaaaat!?


----------



## tink8jr

Yeah its a very sad story I am so glad they don't have to go through that anymore.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

tink8jr said:


> To many people have kids just to have them, not everyone is suppose to be a parent, So I feel if you don't want kids don't have them that is your choice and you are being a responsible adult everyone else needs to mind there business and worry about there on life, not why do you have four kids, or two or one or none! My question to those people is why do you need to know?



Thank you. Well said.


----------



## maddhatir

*Calling Suzibrat!*


Some* Slipknot *and DISTURBED concert news!

I have been waiting to see Disturbed for a long time- so I thought I would just Google some tour info and found this
http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1580706/20080131/slipknot.jhtml

 I see they will be in Camden NJ on 8/15   

and on 8/13 in Boston! Is that close to you????

I am SO getting tix- I do despise these all day concert things- with all of those testosterone infested kids- BUT I will just find out what time Slipknot and Disturbed will take the stage- most likely at the end of the day- and just scoot in the venue then!

DH will NOT be happy- he hates those kinds of concerts too- but- I have my LIST of must see bands- and Disturbed in on it!

OMG - AS I am writing this- the DJ on SIRIUS is TALKING ABOUT IT! 

This is DESTINY!!!!!


----------



## ChisJo

Hey everyone...it's been awhile for me on this thread. Haven't read through the posts, so I hope everyone is doing well. 

Quick story for you....I have a very good friend who has 2 children and is very accepting of my decision not to have kids (in fact, she encourages that decision ). Not too long ago, she had a Party lite party and I attended. I know her family quite well, and many of them came to the party. Her one grandma is deaf, so communicating can be hard, but I did get her when she pointed at my finger and saw there was no wedding band on there yet, the head shake, and then she pointed at my belly, then to the kids running around, and I shook my head no, no kids. She shook her head and gave me a look of pity...like I was missing out. She is quite elderly, so she may think differently, but I honestly have only seen her 5 times in my life and again, it just irks me...alot, that people think 2 people in a relationship have to have children, just because that's societals expectation.

Anyways, off that rant...

Madd - I am getting really excited about seeing the Foo's later this month...have you ever seen them live??? Would LOVE to see Disturbed too! Doubt they'll ever come to my neck of the woods though...

OT: We are thinking of heading to New Orleans following a convention near by with my BF's company. Has anyone ever been to New Orleans? We are thinking of going and I need some pointers, where to stay? Do we need a car? Any hotel recommendations? How are the Bed and Breakfasts? What should w do? We'll have 4 days in May to explore the city. Any help would be greatly appreciated!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

ChisJo said:


> Madd - I am getting really excited about seeing the Foo's later this month...have you ever seen them live??? Would LOVE to see Disturbed too! Doubt they'll ever come to my neck of the woods though...
> 
> !



I saw them what has to be at least 7 years ago or so now...they were amazing...I saw them when they were touring with RHCP(oops sorry, red hot chili peppers for any that didn't know) both were completely awesome...but I haven't had another chance to see either since...Hope you enjoy the show!!!


----------



## maddhatir

ChisJo said:


> Hey everyone...it's been awhile for me on this thread. Haven't read through the posts, so I hope everyone is doing well.
> 
> Quick story for you....I have a very good friend who has 2 children and is very accepting of my decision not to have kids (in fact, she encourages that decision ). Not too long ago, she had a Party lite party and I attended. I know her family quite well, and many of them came to the party. Her one grandma is deaf, so communicating can be hard, but I did get her when she pointed at my finger and saw there was no wedding band on there yet, the head shake, and then she pointed at my belly, then to the kids running around, and I shook my head no, no kids. She shook her head and gave me a look of pity...like I was missing out. She is quite elderly, so she may think differently, but I honestly have only seen her 5 times in my life and again, it just irks me...alot, that people think 2 people in a relationship have to have children, just because that's societals expectation.



awww- even a little ol' deaf lady?..... 



> Madd - I am getting really excited about seeing the Foo's later this month...have you ever seen them live??? Would LOVE to see Disturbed too! Doubt they'll ever come to my neck of the woods though...



You know- sometimes I hear a song by the FF and say- hey thats not bad- and then others are just way too mellow to risk getting a CD- I got a FF CD on the freebie thread and was kind of disappointed- I gave it to my SIL. I need it raw and crunchy, loud and nasty- my music that is Ok and my men......MAN!  





and- I have never been to New Orleans- I would love to go and check out the cemeteries and some of the voodoooooooo!  I BET the B&Bs there are awesome!


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Hope everyone is doing well.


----------



## Hixski

ChisJo said:


> Hey everyone...it's been awhile for me on this thread. Haven't read through the posts, so I hope everyone is doing well.
> 
> Quick story for you....I have a very good friend who has 2 children and is very accepting of my decision not to have kids (in fact, she encourages that decision ). Not too long ago, she had a Party lite party and I attended. I know her family quite well, and many of them came to the party. Her one grandma is deaf, so communicating can be hard, but I did get her when she pointed at my finger and saw there was no wedding band on there yet, the head shake, and then she pointed at my belly, then to the kids running around, and I shook my head no, no kids. She shook her head and gave me a look of pity...like I was missing out. She is quite elderly, so she may think differently, but I honestly have only seen her 5 times in my life and again, it just irks me...alot, that people think 2 people in a relationship have to have children, just because that's societals expectation.
> 
> Anyways, off that rant...
> 
> Madd - I am getting really excited about seeing the Foo's later this month...have you ever seen them live??? Would LOVE to see Disturbed too! Doubt they'll ever come to my neck of the woods though...
> 
> OT: We are thinking of heading to New Orleans following a convention near by with my BF's company. Has anyone ever been to New Orleans? We are thinking of going and I need some pointers, where to stay? Do we need a car? Any hotel recommendations? How are the Bed and Breakfasts? What should w do? We'll have 4 days in May to explore the city. Any help would be greatly appreciated!




I think that is funny about the elderly grandma. We deal with this a bit from time to time with my MIL. DH is the youngest of 7 kids. They had him when they were 44. He is now 49 so his mother is 93  (father passed away 10 yrs ago). 

She is an absolute sweetheart and still sharp as a tack. That being said she still sometimes thinks in terms of how SHE grew up. DH called to check on her the other day (she lives a couple of hours away) and she was complaining about one of her DIL's. DH's brother is 68 and his wife is 53-54. He still works part time and she works full time. Now I will say she is lazy and her and the 20-something daughter don't do anything around the house. DH's brother is left to do the housework and the yardwork.

The part that was funny was she said that *"It is the womans job to take care of the house and fix dinners"!!!!* DH had to tell her that while DIL is lazy things just don't work that way in the 21st century. He asked her if she thought we were doing it all wrong because we both work and both have to care take of whatever needs done. She decided that in our case we should work things out the way we do but "The woman still needs to take care of everything in the house." SIGHHHH.....I guess you can't change 93 yrs of upbringing.


----------



## Liisa

Madd and Suzibrat,

You both make me laugh and feel totally NOT "in the know" with bands.  I'm in my mid 30's and haven't even HEARD of the bands you guys toss around.  I told my husband about it and (big supporter that he is  )  he tells me "well, honey, you're just not cool!".  I think he's right!  The CD's in my car are the Mama Mia soundtrack, several CD's from Disney world (love the music from Wishes and Fantasmic), Simon & Garfunkel, and a mix of a bunch of songs I pulled together.  


Hixski,

I was thinking of you, I booked a vacation to Vero Beach yesterday for mid-September!  It will be our first trip.  Guess I better start looking at what is around there for restaurants.  We are taking my parents and I know they definitely want to hit NASA.


Tomorrow, DH and I are heading to an open house for Newfoundland rescues.  We are considering, maybe, possible looking for a Newf puppy (after the terrible weekend trying to rescue Kayla the adult dog, we've decided a pup will be our best chance of success in adding a third to our family... although hubby isn't yet convinced we need a third dog at all... yet.  I'm still working on him!)   

Anyone got big weekend plans? 

Liisa


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

No big plans for the weekend other than MORE getting the house in order work.  I made great progress last weekend w/ organizing the kitchen and dining room and living room and now onto bedroom.  Boy, moving sure does take it out of you.

I'm so tired, I could go to sleep right now.


----------



## Hixski

Liisa said:


> Hixski,
> 
> I was thinking of you, I booked a vacation to Vero Beach yesterday for mid-September!  It will be our first trip.  Guess I better start looking at what is around there for restaurants.  We are taking my parents and I know they definitely want to hit NASA.
> 
> Liisa



Squid Lips in Sebastian has wonderful food. That place is our favorite. We went there 3 different afternoon/evenings for happy hour the last time we were there. They had huge shrimp with Old Bay seasoning and grouper fingers (you know chicken fingers but with fish). It is a mostly open air place (the windows zip up). The decor is what I would call beachside diner decor. Nothing fancy. Great food though. I even have a picture.


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Madd and Suzibrat,
> 
> You both make me laugh and feel totally NOT "in the know" with bands.  I'm in my mid 30's and haven't even HEARD of the bands you guys toss around.  I told my husband about it and (big supporter that he is  )  he tells me "well, honey, you're just not cool!".  I think he's right!  The CD's in my car are the Mama Mia soundtrack, several CD's from Disney world (love the music from Wishes and Fantasmic), Simon & Garfunkel, and a mix of a bunch of songs I pulled together.



Where *IS *Suzi- I want to see if she has heard of *Cavalera Conspiracy* B/C I am ADDICTED to their song *Inflikted*

Lisa- I am so glad you are thinkng about another dog- with the puppy she will just _grow into _your other 2! No voilence to worry about.

Make sure you post pics if you do get a pup!!!


----------



## maddhatir

I know all of you would LOVE to see the youtube video of the song 

BUT- I cannot post the link b/c the song has the F word in it! You can just You Tube it.  Choose the vid that looks like it is black and white.......not the live version.
fast forward to 1:35 seconds and THAT is all I keep singing in my head!!! 

It won't go away.......


----------



## PhotobearSam

3 weeks ago, I got a call asking to rent one of our chalets for a month because the person needing it had a husband in the hospital with a stroke and needed a long term rental. It was $750 plus $250 damage deposit because it's non-smoking and the person does smoke...


Well, they were supposed to be out next week and I had gotten a call from a hockey team who wanted all the chalets I had left so I needed to know if the person already in the chalet needed it any longer. I called her several times on her cell but she would not answer. I figured that she was at the hospital with her cell off. I stopped by one day and noticed a cigarette but on my step instead of in the container and I then REALLY wanted to know if she smoked in my NON-smoking chalet. So I open the door to find SEVERAL of my plates being used as ashtrays but it got worse when my tunnel vision widened. 

There was at LEAST 200 needles EVERYWHERE...She had turned my beautiful chalet into a CRACK house or a Heroin House or something...Can you tell I have never done any drugs?

Well, I then had a talk with my folks...Do I call the cops? Change the locks? Confront her? What should I do. Well, we decided that I should not involve the cops as we did not know what kind of reaction that would cause and we did not want to be left with all those needles to pick up. So I had to wait 4 days to corner her there (she was never around) and then I called. I told her about the hockey team and that I needed to know about if she needed the chalet for longer...She said yes, how much? I said $250...which she brought to me. I did this since she had burned our couch and I figured this was the only way I would see any $ for the damage because the original $250 was not even going to come close.

Well, I then followed her back to her cottage, knocked on the door and handed her a needle bin I got at the pharmacy and said "We don't accept drugs here, you need to pick up EVERY needle in there, get your crap and get out. She then argued with me that if I wanted $250 for damage, I just had to ask and she would have brought it to me...I laughed and asked her why I would trust a drug addict?

Well, I stood in the driveway of her unit, out in the cold, for 4 1/2 hours while she cleared out her stuff...and FILLED the large needle bucket I gave her...

It was the most stressful week. I could not eat or sleep while I waited everyday to try to catch her. The reason I waited till she was there was that I did not want anyone on my staff or myself to have to touch all those needles and I wanted my key back.

Well, there is a lot more damage than $500 but I am just glad she is gone. I have to replace the door frame and the couch, the kitchen table has a lot of burn marks but I think it can be saved and I have to paint the cottage and steam clean the rest of the furniture. All that in 3 weeks...I hate my job sometimes.

When it comes to renters, there are 2 kinds and 2 kinds only...The nice, hard working, honest ones and the scum of the earth...there does not seem to be a middle ground.

My parents own a lot of apartments and I own one and it is the worst of all my jobs. I am just glad it is over. This is the second time this has happened but the first one was an insurance company that was paying because their client had a flood. We knew the client, she was the receptionist at our local health clinic and we thought she would be fine...Not. We had to replace EVERYTHING and are still trying to get paid for it. Thank god all my other clients over the past 6 years have been right on or I would lose my mind...


Thanks for letting me vent. That person was a waste of flesh...I am very happy I don't have kids because raising them in this crazy world would be the death of me. At least kittens don't do drugs...


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> There was at LEAST 200 needles EVERYWHERE...She had turned my beautiful chalet into a CRACK house or a Heroin House or something...Can you tell I have never done any drugs?
> 
> .



 Man- I would have been on the phone with the cops so fast! NO hesitation!

Glad things worked out and got rid of her though. I wonder if the DH n the hospital was the truth?


----------



## PhotobearSam

My first instinct was to call the cops but since my parents have had little help from them before, my Dad was more concerned that they would retaliate in some way...They are in Florida and worry about me a lot even though I am 35 yrs old. They still see me as their baby...

It really did work out for the best....I just hated it. In April 2009 is our last payment to the bank for the chalets (opened June 2001...Yeah, paying off more than 2 years early... ) and after that, It will be easier.

I am just happy that I did not have to dispose of the needles because i would NEVER have asked an employee to do it...Thank God it's over.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

PhotobearSam said:


> Thanks for letting me vent. That person was a waste of flesh...I am very happy I don't have kids because raising them in this crazy world would be the death of me. At least kittens don't do drugs...



Sam - Sorry you've had a such a rough week!  You have far more patience than I do. I would have called the cops immediately. So glad you were able to get her to leave without incident.


----------



## Hixski

Sam: There are just too many crazies out there. Glad everything worked out. My dog is a druggie though. He has to take medicine for his hypothyroidism. Just like his mommy.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Aunt Michelle said:


> Sam - Sorry you've had a such a rough week!  You have far more patience than I do. I would have called the cops immediately. So glad you were able to get her to leave without incident.




Thanks everyone. Now I have to worry about flooding...What a week.

Well, I really wanted to call the cops but the main thing was that I did not want to have to deal with the needles and I knew if I called the cops that they would take her away and I would have to pick them up...This way, she's gone, the needles are gone and it ok.


What is everyone doing this weekend?


----------



## plgrn

maddhatir said:


> Man- I would have been on the phone with the cops so fast! NO hesitation!



I would have done the same thing and then probably regretted it as soon as I was picking up needles and letting my mind race with thoughts of her seeking revenge! Glad it worked out ok, Sam, and that it's over with.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Great...Now we are flooding. We are in the midst of an ice storm and I have 4 chalets that have 1 inch of water in them in some areas...

We are not in a flood prone area but the snow and rain is so much this year that the earth is just saturated...I had a tractor come and dig a trench behind the chalets tonight...I can't wait to see that bill...A tractor on a Saturday night... 

Then I get home and my furnace room has some water on the floor in the corner...I have had it. 

Someone tell me some good news...


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> *Calling Suzibrat!*
> 
> 
> Some* Slipknot *and DISTURBED concert news!
> 
> I have been waiting to see Disturbed for a long time- so I thought I would just Google some tour info and found this
> http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1580706/20080131/slipknot.jhtml
> 
> I see they will be in Camden NJ on 8/15
> 
> and on 8/13 in Boston! Is that close to you????
> 
> I am SO getting tix- I do despise these all day concert things- with all of those testosterone infested kids- BUT I will just find out what time Slipknot and Disturbed will take the stage- most likely at the end of the day- and just scoot in the venue then!
> 
> DH will NOT be happy- he hates those kinds of concerts too- but- I have my LIST of must see bands- and Disturbed in on it!
> 
> OMG - AS I am writing this- the DJ on SIRIUS is TALKING ABOUT IT!
> 
> This is DESTINY!!!!!


*Hey Madd! I'm here! I've been busy with work and my computer has been a pain in the butt all week. Slipknot hasn't officially announced any tour dates yet so those dates could change. They will be announcing the official tour dates shortly. I feel sorry for the people that are being raked over the coals buying tickets already. The tickets are clearly fakes and they are paying astronomical prices for them.  Without saying too much, I have to attend an East Coast show because we are having a staff event meet and greet. So I'll let you know which one I'll be at and we can meet up to chat for a bit!  *
*Did you get to see Headbanger's Ball last night? Joey (the drummer) was on with 3 Inches Of Blood....coolness!!!!*


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *Hey Madd! I'm here! I've been busy with work and my computer has been a pain in the butt all week. Slipknot hasn't officially announced any tour dates yet so those dates could change. They will be announcing the official tour dates shortly. I feel sorry for the people that are being raked over the coals buying tickets already. The tickets are clearly fakes and they are paying astronomical prices for them.  Without saying too much, I have to attend an East Coast show because we are having a staff event meet and greet. So I'll let you know which one I'll be at and we can meet up to chat for a bit!  *
> *Did you get to see Headbanger's Ball last night? Joey (the drummer) was on with 3 Inches Of Blood....coolness!!!!*



I have noted Aug 15th on my calendar (tentativly, that is!) That is the only one that is close to me! Is that where you might be? What kind of work do you do, if you do not mind me asking- if you do- say- SKIP that question 

No- I don't watch Headbanger's Ball- that is SO funny I used to watch that in the 80s THAT was the only place you would get to see the REALLY good videos!!!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> Reason for this post.....Just watching Flyers vs Rangers and......
> 
> I know some of us here are hockey fans aka PUCK bunnies
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> but have not seen a lot of our regular bunnies around in a while!
> 
> ...........Anyway I see this commercial all the time when watching the Flyers games-
> 
> It is so funny- I cannot relate to the parent and the nursery But I just love the hockey analogy!
> 
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EG6orPtnhdY
> 
> and the only thing this next one has to do with hockey is, I see it all the time while watching the games and PEE my pants it's so funny!
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWgbMJZupGM&feature=related
> 
> Has anyone seen either of them?



Sorry I'm a bit late getting a reply in on this one...we got in about midnight/1am...last night.  Lost an hour coming home + another hour to DST.  Boy am I off today!

My husband _loves _that commercial.  We've seen it for a while.

Have you seen this one yet?!?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OvU-p_x7tDA


----------



## zima-cheryl

In catching up on my e-mails I got the latest from Ill Will Press...

http://www.illwillpress.com/

Check out the cartoon for this week - too funny!  
I love the part about kids in restaurants...  Could say the same thing about kids on airplanes & in airports!

Be forewarned...this little squirrel cusses like a sailor in port!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> In catching up on my e-mails I got the latest from Ill Will Press...
> 
> http://www.illwillpress.com/
> 
> Check out the cartoon for this week - too funny!
> I love the part about kids in restaurants...  Could say the same thing about kids on airplanes & in airports!
> 
> Be forewarned...this little squirrel cusses like a sailor in port!



I WANNA HEAR ABOUT YOUR TRIP, YOUR TRIP!!!!!!!


----------



## PhotobearSam

OMG...thanks for sharing...That is the funniest site I have seen in a long time...


----------



## maddhatir

OMG!

I love both of them- but, Foamy the Squirrel was the BEST!

I forwarded it to some people who could "appreciate" the humor 

See now- we are not the only one's who complain about the little kiddies


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> I WANNA HEAR ABOUT YOUR TRIP, YOUR TRIP!!!!!!!



Besides being too short we had a great time!

We didn't do a whole lot.  Did some kayaking around the mangroves in the lagoon one afternoon, went parasailing one morning, and spent a day at Isla Mujeres which worked well.  DH found himself a comfy hammock & I was able to snorkle & play in the water.  

We got out to a few good restaurants.  In general ate and drank _waaaay _too much (love the all inclusives)!  I gained about 5 pounds last week I think.  (Back to the gym this week)

Most days we spent several hours at the beach or the pool just napping and reading.  I think I read 5 books last week (I'm lucky if I can get to read 1 a month at home).  On our last day we splurged for a turkish bed right on the beach...
 
Big pillows, comfy bed to lounge on & side curtains to give you a break from the sun & some privacy from your neighbors.  

The Omni was great.  It is at the top end of the hotel strip & a bit smaller.  We had maybe a dozen spring breakers running around, but nothing like we saw at some of the other hotels.  And the night we went to Senior Frogs was fun.  Aaahhh if I could be a kid again!  I remember those days.  
Still, it was fun to be there & see them having such a good time. 
And honsetly, I like being happily married and not having to worry about the dating/mating game any more! 
Of course we went from the hotel to Sr. Frogs w/the kids from the Omni - I loved the looks we got - you know that "Oh aren't the old people cute going out to the clubs" look.   

We decided that 10 days would really be the perfect length of time to be there.  No sooner have you started to really truly unwind from home and work and it is time to start packing things and getting ready for the return to reality.  

I still use the old fashion disposable cameras, so it will be a few days before I get to Wal-Mart & get my pix CD back.  If we got any good pix I'll post a couple.  I'm hoping the parasailing pix came out.  The view up there was amazing!

Sorry for rambling so long...but it was a great vacation!
Tomorrow, back to work & reality


----------



## zima-cheryl

PhotobearSam said:


> OMG...thanks for sharing...That is the funniest site I have seen in a long time...



Glad it could make you smile...esp. since you are having such a rough week from the sounds of things.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Besides being too short we had a great time!



That is GREAT that you got to relax! That is the best feeling ever when you do an all inclusive!

Did you by chance, get to shop at La Isla??


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> That is GREAT that you got to relax! That is the best feeling ever when you do an all inclusive!
> 
> Did you by chance, get to shop at La Isla??




No, actually we didn't do any shopping this time (unless you count the cuban cigars DH had while we were there).  This was our 4th trip to Cancun so we don't really shop as much any more.  And I've never been one to shop just for the sake of shopping.  

For us it is more about the relaxing & eating!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> No, actually we didn't do any shopping this time (unless you count the cuban cigars DH had while we were there).  This was our 4th trip to Cancun so we don't really shop as much any more.  And I've never been one to shop just for the sake of shopping.
> 
> For us it is more about the relaxing & eating!



ITA- I never go to Cancun just to shop- it is just that one particular shopping area is BEAUTIFUL! Even if you do not buy anything- it is some place to see.


----------



## maddhatir

The only shopping I did was at the resort when the vendors came in. I got a really cute (what do you call those mexican sweater things they sell in EPCOT??) well, one of those- it had Harley Davidson on one side and Riviera Maya on the other. 

I also got an adorable black little handbag with pretty flowers embroidered on it and, for my boss, she loves beach scenes, sea-life pics- she just got a new office so I got a local artist that was at the resort to make her a pic-- It was really interesting to actually watch the picture making process!
















He kept using a flame on the pic? Maybe to dry it a bit? It was good for the "show" anyway


----------



## LisaZee

Sam!  Sounds like you need a drinky-poo!  While I cannot offer you one from so far away, I can offer up this story (both drink related and child related) to make you either laugh or cringe - I did both!

So, the spouse and I are eating at Chili's tonight.  He worked all weekend so I picked him up and decided to take him to dinner.  Halfway through my salad, a dad is shuffling his young son (maybe 5 or 6?) past our table, saying "just breathe in and out".  This can't be good...  The kid spews BLUE ICKINESS not once, not twice, but THRICE - not a foot and a half away from our table.      EW EW EW EW EW.      The father starts laughing and pushes the kid toward the restrooms.  Did I mention it was blue slush?  EWWWWWWW.  Um, yeah... done with my salad, thank you.

Sorry I can't help with the needles or flooding, but I wanted to make you giggle.


----------



## PhotobearSam

LisaZee said:


> Sam!  Sounds like you need a drinky-poo!  While I cannot offer you one from so far away, I can offer up this story (both drink related and child related) to make you either laugh or cringe - I did both!
> 
> So, the spouse and I are eating at Chili's tonight.  He worked all weekend so I picked him up and decided to take him to dinner.  Halfway through my salad, a dad is shuffling his young son (maybe 5 or 6?) past our table, saying "just breathe in and out".  This can't be good...  The kid spews BLUE ICKINESS not once, not twice, but THRICE - not a foot and a half away from our table.      EW EW EW EW EW.      The father starts laughing and pushes the kid toward the restrooms.  Did I mention it was blue slush?  EWWWWWWW.  Um, yeah... done with my salad, thank you.
> 
> Sorry I can't help with the needles or flooding, but I wanted to make you giggle.




Now my life just seems so much better... 


That would have been the end of the meal for me...I would not have been able to stay. I can't believe the Dad was laughing...

Thanks for the virtual drink offer...I'm off to our liquor cabinet for something...I don't usually drink but I need something tonight.

To all the 30 somethings here...I just watched "Purple Rain" on the satellite and I feel really old...I think I will make my drink a double.


----------



## LisaZee

You wanna know what makes me feel old?  When I tell some of my young (19-21 year old) employees what life was like before cell phones.  I was telling one girl that my first cell phone was what they called a bag phone - does anyone remember these?  They were like mini-briefcases and the phone was an actual handset on a CORD attached to a battery in the bag.  How did I ever text on it, she asks?    And I tell her it used to cost $4 a minute to talk, and that my mom threatened me that someone had better be bleeding if I were to use the phone.    She can't fathom it.  And then when she complains about not being able to get on a "fast" computer in her college library to download sources for her papers, I tell her that we used the Dewey Decimal System to find books and magazines, that we had to pay a dime to put then on a copy machine.  Gasp!  And then I tell her the internet didn't exist til I was out of college.  What?  No internet?  Lisa, you LIE, she says.   

And then I go home, pluck those strange hairs that grow out of my chin, put on QVC, and go to bed.  Sigh...


----------



## Mozart

PhotobearSam said:


> To all the 30 somethings here...I just watched "Purple Rain" on the satellite and I feel really old...I think I will make my drink a double.



Have you heard?  There's a brand new dance...and it's called The Bird!

I miss the 80's.

Well, I'm recovering from an interesting weekend right now.  My SIL called us on Wednesday and asked us if we could watch her kids overnight this weekend.  (4 year old nephew and 2 year old niece.)  They just needed a night away, and were desperate.  So, we helped.

After 24 hours with two kids, I now reconfirm my commitment to the fact that I shall not have any of my own.  I like my peace and quiet, and you just don't get that with two kids in the house.

In good news, though...this weekend I watched Mary Poppins, Toy Story,  Oliver and Company, and Cinderella.  When worn out...pop in a video.  It's an easy way to keep them occupied for an hour and a half at a time, and I haven't had a Disney weekend in a while.


----------



## Hixski

Will all of you stop making me feel old!!!??? You are missing the 80's and I am missing the 70's. 

We are going to Sacramento in April to see some very dear friends of ours. They have 10 and 8 yr old girls. Those girls will be attached to us like glue from the minute we get there till the minute we go. When the oldest was young I used to tell her she was my best little buddy in the whole world. She STILL remembers that. I had to tell her younger sister when she was old enough that she was my best little buddy too. They think its funny now to argue who is the best little buddy. Crazy girls!! 

Zima-cheryl: Your trip sounds wonderful. I am needing a vacation right now. At least April is not that far away.

Madd: We watched a street artist in Key West doing the same type of painting that you are showing there. It was fascinating to watch them work with spray cans and watch the painting unfold.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

LisaZee said:


> You wanna know what makes me feel old?  When I tell some of my young (19-21 year old) employees what life was like before cell phones.  I was telling one girl that my first cell phone was what they called a bag phone - does anyone remember these?  They were like mini-briefcases and the phone was an actual handset on a CORD attached to a battery in the bag.  How did I ever text on it, she asks?    And I tell her it used to cost $4 a minute to talk, and that my mom threatened me that someone had better be bleeding if I were to use the phone.    She can't fathom it.  And then when she complains about not being able to get on a "fast" computer in her college library to download sources for her papers, I tell her that we used the Dewey Decimal System to find books and magazines, that we had to pay a dime to put then on a copy machine.  Gasp!  And then I tell her the internet didn't exist til I was out of college.  What?  No internet?  Lisa, you LIE, she says.
> 
> And then I go home, pluck those strange hairs that grow out of my chin, put on QVC, and go to bed.  Sigh...



    I wonder what they would say if I told them I didn't even have a cell phone until I was 30!


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Mozart said:


> Have you heard?  There's a brand new dance...and it's called The Bird!
> 
> I miss the 80's.



Mozart - I miss the 80s too! This is one of the reasons why I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE my XM Radio!


----------



## Liisa

LisaZee said:


> You wanna know what makes me feel old?  When I tell some of my young (19-21 year old) employees what life was like before cell phones.  I was telling one girl that my first cell phone was what they called a bag phone - does anyone remember these?




Yup, that was my first phone too.  I think I got to use it maybe twice - and only to call my parents for some "emergency" situation.  We were NOT allowed to use it.

Hixski,  I made a note of Squid lips to stop by while we are down at Vero Beach.  Thanks for the suggestion.  It looks exactly like the relaxing fun type of place we'd love to visit.

Madd, looks like DH won, no pup for us... this year anyway.  My younger boy, Khabo has a luxating patella (a knee cap that slips every so often).  We have an appt with an orthopedic vet.  But having him bounce around with a puppy this year, could be bad.  He needs more muscle to support the joint and DH and I figure there is a chance the orthopedic vet will recommend surgery.  Too much stuff going on to think about bringing in a new guy.

So as you can imagine, I was a little downhearted about the whole thing.  DH felt bad (esp. since he was relieved about the dog thing.  He isn't quite ready).  To make it up to me, he booked a Disney trip for our anniversary in June!  This is going to be a good year - Mexico in May, Disney in June, Vero Beach in September.   

Sam - EEEEEKK!     I can't even imagine what I would have done if that whole thing had happened to me.  Talk about a tenant nightmare!!!  So glad it turned out ok in the end!

Liisa


----------



## PhotobearSam

Mozart said:


> Have you heard?  There's a brand new dance...and it's called The Bird!
> 
> I miss the 80's.





 That's my favourite part... 
Our fashion sense was way off but the MUSIC was the BEST!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Madd, looks like DH won, no pup for us... this year anyway.  My younger boy, Khabo has a luxating patella (a knee cap that slips every so often).  We have an appt with an orthopedic vet.  But having him bounce around with a puppy this year, could be bad.  He needs more muscle to support the joint and DH and I figure there is a chance the orthopedic vet will recommend surgery.  Too much stuff going on to think about bringing in a new guy.



I can recommend the doc I went to Maybe you can give Khabo- the Osteo Bi-Flex? My cousin gives it to her dog! 



> So as you can imagine, I was a little downhearted about the whole thing.  DH felt bad (esp. since he was relieved about the dog thing.  He isn't quite ready).  *To make it up to me, he booked a Disney trip for our anniversary in June!*  This is going to be a good year - Mexico in May, Disney in June, Vero Beach in September.



      To your DH!


----------



## plgrn

zima-cheryl said:


> In catching up on my e-mails I got the latest from Ill Will Press...
> 
> http://www.illwillpress.com/
> 
> Check out the cartoon for this week - too funny!
> I love the part about kids in restaurants...  Could say the same thing about kids on airplanes & in airports!
> 
> Be forewarned...this little squirrel cusses like a sailor in port!




 DH could write that stuff! I called him in here to watch and he goes "Finally! Someone who understands me!"


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> I can recommend the doc I went to Maybe you can give Khabo- the Osteo Bi-Flex? My cousin gives it to her dog!
> 
> 
> 
> To your DH!




It totally agree about DH!  He won major brownie points for that one.

And Khabo is already on Cosequin - doggie equivalent for Osteo Bi-Flex.  I can deal with one pill.  We also have a holistic anti-inflammatory we give him if he has several episodes in a short time.  He's still not as bad as my Yeti-bear - poor guys was on 14 pills a day (thyroid, seizure meds, and some vitamins).  Had to have a pill box to keep them straight.  I guess I'll be ready to care for my parents when they get old... the dogs have been training me!


----------



## Liisa

plgrn said:


> DH could write that stuff! I called him in here to watch and he goes "Finally! Someone who understands me!"




I'm going to show my DH tonight.  He's going to get a kick out of it.  People... UGH!


----------



## PoohNTuck

Sam,

Sorry to hear about your chalet.  I don't post often but do read.  That's heartbreaking and scary!  It sounds like you dealt with it well!


And as for music preferences...
For the record, I'm 28 and I love "classic rock", "metal- the older stuff like ozzy, metallica, etc" and old 80s hair bands as well.  It's my favorite stuff to listen to and DH doesn't understand it because he's younger and listens to hip hop.  Rarely do we both enjoy a song on the radio   I don't tell my coworkers or most people I meet what I really enjoy listening to... most people don't understand and have negative feelings about the type of person I must be to listen to it.  I thought I was the only female left listening to it these days... it's comforting to know there are more of you out there!


----------



## maddhatir

PoohNTuck said:


> Sam,
> 
> Sorry to hear about your chalet.  I don't post often but do read.  That's heartbreaking and scary!  It sounds like you dealt with it well!
> 
> 
> And as for music preferences...
> For the record, I'm 28 and I love "classic rock", "metal- the older stuff like ozzy, metallica, etc" and old 80s hair bands as well.  It's my favorite stuff to listen to and DH doesn't understand it because he's younger and listens to hip hop.  Rarely do we both enjoy a song on the radio  *I don't tell my coworkers or most people I meet what I really enjoy listening to... most people don't understand and have negative feelings about the type of person I must be to listen to it.*  I thought I was the only female left listening to it these days... it's comforting to know there are more of you out there!



 

How do you think *I* feel- I am 43 rockin' out to Korn Exodus, Slayer- and of COURSE Metallica! 

I don't care what people think- most people have a stick up their butts anyway I always feel they WISH they can let loose and be something else. They are stuck in a mold. NOT everyone, just those that have the nasty comments. 

I remember way back in the day- the first band I really loved was KISS- my aunt took us to see them when I was in 7th grade and went to every concert they had in Philly after that. 

Anyway one day in the mall- my cousin had a few KISS buttons on her jacket, KISS shirt etc and some stuffed up B%$#@ said to her, "I am SO glad you are not MY daughter!"

Shocked ......All she could say was......"Well, I am glad you are not my MOTHER!" Good come back huh?   But you get some adult saying that to a kid they do not even know! We were good kids- just b/c we listened to KISS does not mean otherwise!

When I see a kid with piercings, a mohawk, different color hair- I never think ewwww- I just remember back in the 70s and 80s and what *I* looked like and people made the snide remarks. 

I am not going to be one of those idiots that need to judge.  

SO! Let your metal flag FLY! SC%$W your co-workers! and welcome to the thread! 


.


----------



## maddhatir

Oh- on a whole other topic!

I was listening to the local sports station in the car yesterday and they were talking about kids- and sports.

The guys were saying how sports are no fun anymore for kids b/c they are so _organized_- they went on to bash the parents for being SO obnoxious about the kids playing and the refereeing and who did not put their little Johnny in the game! Oh- it is so true!

They were talking about how when they were kids and you would play baseball out in someones field- with however many kids you can round up- or, if you were on a team, your parents would drop you off...and you would just PLAY and have a good time!

Not any more- seems parents are really messing up kids pretty bad nowadays- in every aspect of life 

Now parents need to be sure they little one gets THIS and gets THAT, b/c they feel they are entitled to it 

and I might be back b/c I know I was thinking about another topic earlier this morning that I wanted to comment on......hmmmmm......the brain cells are gone!.....but I have a lot of fun waving goodbye to them!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> and I might be back b/c I know I was thinking about another topic earlier this morning that I wanted to comment on......hmmmmm......the brain cells are gone!.....but I have a lot of fun waving goodbye to them!



I think I lost a few brain cells back in the 70's. The rest I am losing now due to menopause. I must have had an overabundance of them or surely they would be almost gone by now. 

When I forget something DH asks me if my brain derailed again. He thinks it's funny. Nice way to put in a Captain Jack quote by the way.


----------



## maddhatir

I REMEMBERED!

DH and I went to the liquor store last night. Stock up on Becks Dark, anywho-- this young girl was at the cash register and I COULD NOT UNDERSTAND A D$#@ WORD SHE WAS SAYING! It was a series of grunts and groans!

Have you noticed young people have now resorted to "mumbling" instead of *e-nun-ci-a-ting*

Just watch this 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rvz5zYm5SDo

I am always yelling out that word when I can't understand people


----------



## 2vets

I cannot believe this thread is still here, from 2 years ago, right on the first page!!!  I posted some sappy nonsense on page 14 in 2006.  I can't believe I ever even seemed that much like I might convert to the mommy camp!  

We moved to CA, so it's been a couple of years since we've been to WDW, but we are going back twice this year...heh heh heh...stroller-dodging, I'm all about it.

(Seriously, too funny that this is still here...)


----------



## maddhatir

2vets said:


> I cannot believe this thread is still here, from 2 years ago, right on the first page!!!  I posted some sappy nonsense on page 14 in 2006.  I can't believe I ever even seemed that much like I might convert to the mommy camp!
> 
> We moved to CA, so it's been a couple of years since we've been to WDW, but we are going back twice this year...heh heh heh...stroller-dodging, I'm all about it.
> 
> (Seriously, too funny that this is still here...)



 Welcome back!!!


----------



## PhotobearSam

PoohNTuck said:


> Sam,
> 
> Sorry to hear about your chalet.  I don't post often but do read.  That's heartbreaking and scary!  It sounds like you dealt with it well!
> 
> 
> And as for music preferences...
> For the record, I'm 28 and I love "classic rock", "metal- the older stuff like ozzy, metallica, etc" and old 80s hair bands as well.  It's my favorite stuff to listen to and DH doesn't understand it because he's younger and listens to hip hop.  Rarely do we both enjoy a song on the radio   I don't tell my coworkers or most people I meet what I really enjoy listening to... most people don't understand and have negative feelings about the type of person I must be to listen to it.  I thought I was the only female left listening to it these days... it's comforting to know there are more of you out there!




It really is a NICE thread where people can support a total stranger like this...Thanks.


----------



## PhotobearSam

2vets said:


> I cannot believe this thread is still here, from 2 years ago, right on the first page!!!  I posted some sappy nonsense on page 14 in 2006.  I can't believe I ever even seemed that much like I might convert to the mommy camp!
> 
> We moved to CA, so it's been a couple of years since we've been to WDW, but we are going back twice this year...heh heh heh...stroller-dodging, I'm all about it.
> 
> (Seriously, too funny that this is still here...)




We are a tenacious bunch around here...


----------



## LisaZee

Why, oh WHY do I go read and post on That Sea of Judgement, AKA The Community Board?  Why?  Sigh.  Anyhoo...

I was reading Madd's post about how parents have screwed up sports for kids, and what I can't wrap my head around is why there is no first place anymore - no winners.  Everyone's a winner - you all get trophies because you are all equally athletically superior, even though you, Little Johnny, struck out every time at bat and you, Little Suzie, fall on your face every time you try to kick a soccer ball.  But first place for everyone!  Whaaaat?  I'm all about encouragement, but is this realistic?  Life does not hand out trophies to everyone just for playing.  I wish it did.  (I also wish it handed out new cars, but that ain't gonna happen either.)  Does this do a dis-service to kids?  Maybe if they didn't come in first this year, they would try harder so that they came in first NEXT year...  

I dunno.  Maybe I'm bitter because the only trophy I have is for "Most Improved Bowler" from junior high.  Which is code for - "You sucked the worst at the beginning of the season"!  

What about everyone else - since we have no kids to brag on, let's brag on ourselves!    What trophies do you have hiding in your basement, or up on your mantle?


----------



## Suzibrat

LisaZee said:


> Why, oh WHY do I go read and post on That Sea of Judgement, AKA The Community Board? Why? Sigh. Anyhoo...
> 
> I was reading Madd's post about how parents have screwed up sports for kids, and what I can't wrap my head around is why there is no first place anymore - no winners. Everyone's a winner - you all get trophies because you are all equally athletically superior, even though you, Little Johnny, struck out every time at bat *and you, Little Suzie, fall on your face every time you try to kick a soccer ball.* But first place for everyone! Whaaaat? I'm all about encouragement, but is this realistic? Life does not hand out trophies to everyone just for playing. I wish it did. (I also wish it handed out new cars, but that ain't gonna happen either.) Does this do a dis-service to kids? Maybe if they didn't come in first this year, they would try harder so that they came in first NEXT year...
> 
> I dunno. Maybe I'm bitter because the only trophy I have is for "Most Improved Bowler" from junior high. Which is code for - "You sucked the worst at the beginning of the season"!
> 
> What about everyone else - since we have no kids to brag on, let's brag on ourselves!  What trophies do you have hiding in your basement, or up on your mantle?


Did not!! You take that back!      Sorry Lisa. I just couldn't resist! (Actually that's probably why I never played soccer!!) But you can put me into the "Most Improved Bowler Trophy Club". Of course when you start out the season being the Gutterball Queen (No Madd, not the Gutter Queen, I said GutterBALL) there's no where to go but up.
How's everyone else doing today?
Sam, I hope that things calm down for you. You've certainly had a truckload of crap lately haven't you?  
Nothing much new on my end. My internet finally straightened itself out so I don't get booted offline every 3 minutes. Must be all the swearing and threats I made to the computer finally sunk in.  Sometimes my potty mouth is a good thing! (Although my mother might disagree)
I spent a ton of time last night on the budget board going over the freebies for the week. I had never even seen that whole section before! Hubby has to go in for minor surgery next Friday (21st) and then he will be home for 3 weeks recovering.   During this time he will come to realize why we need a second computer because I know he's going to want it while I'm on it. I've been wanting a laptop forever and I bet that when this is over I get one. I also predict I will be drinking large amounts of alcohol during this time as well.... 
It looks like it's going to be a beautiful day here. The sun is up, the seagulls are out there flying around and screaming and all is right with the world. Makes up for the fact that we had bloody snow again yesterday!  
Hope everyone has a great day!


----------



## Hixski

I was and still am athletic. I set 2 records in grade school intramurals against 10 other schools in the 50yd dash. I have 6 Presidential awards (the most you could get back in the 60's-70's). I have 20 or so blue ribbons (firstplace) and red ribbons (second place) for numerous sporting events. I even won a Bronze Medal for downhill snow skiing at 35. 

But the one thing I don't have is NOT ONE BLOODY TROPHY. Back then the world was still so sexist that only the boys got trophies. The best a girl could hope for was a ribbon. I didn't understand it back then and I still don't understand it now. I would be banned forever from the DIS if I wrote what I REALLY thought about kids getting trophies for everything. Especially last place.

Sorry for the vent!! Can you tell I still get ticked off!!??? We have a neighbor whose daughter by her own admission is terrible at sports but yet she has a whole dresser top full of sports trophies.


----------



## Liisa

No trophies for me... I got enrolled in Piano lessons and painting classes.  I finally tried raquetball in college.  But I was more interested in chatting with my opponent than being competitive.  Thankfully, the women in my family tend to be thinner or I would have been in trouble.  I only started a serious work out program 2 years ago - and only then because DH is an avid athlete, peer pressure, you know?!!  

So if we all get in a fight, I'll be right behind the rest of you athletes, cheering you on.  Oh, and I can bake some nice snacks for the "after the fight party".  Cocktails anyone?!!


----------



## PhotobearSam

I have 2 small and 1 larger trophies for.....Wait for it.....BATON TWIRLING!!!! 


I was only in it for a short time as they moved 30 minutes away and my parents could not drive me there 2 times a week.... I actually chucked out the 2 small trophies when my parents sold their house and I did not want to clutter my new home.


I also have a few Basketball and Volleyball medals from Junior High but my best ones were the certificates for Math Challenges...I USED to be good in math.


That's all...and I am no worse for wear. I think it's awful to give trophies to everyone.


My niece is in Ringette,http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ringette, and is just starting in the Bunnies category...It's just to learn the basics and they don't keep score, they all get a participation medal at their tournaments and all celebrate HARD WORK. That's ok with me as next year she will be in Novice and that all changes. They will keep score, play positions, and get trophies for 1st, 2nd and 3rd only...the rest will get participation certificates...

If the everyone gets a trophy is only for the first year and only till the children learn the basics, I think that will encourage the kids to play sports (which is ALWAYS good) but it can't stay that way.

In Bunnies, they can hardly skate let alone keep score so I am ok with it...but after that, let them get the real deal.


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Hubby has to go in for minor surgery next Friday (21st) and then he will be home for 3 weeks recovering.



Suzi- hope your DH makes out OK!!! 



Hixski said:


> I was and still am athletic. I set 2 records in grade school intramurals against 10 other schools in the 50yd dash. I have 6 Presidential awards (the most you could get back in the 60's-70's). I have 20 or so blue ribbons (firstplace) and red ribbons (second place) for numerous sporting events. I even won a Bronze Medal for downhill snow skiing at 35.



WOW! You sure ARE the little athelete!

The only thing I remember winning was a 1st place ribbon in my first grade art show I think I got a few ribbons for a few science fair projects too.

I played some sports when I was younger and hated it. Was really good when playing with neighborhood kids- not on the actual field with other players that I did not know.

I was not into sports in high school........I was more 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




 and 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 and just going through the motions waiting for FRIDAY to come!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> ....just going through the motions waiting for FRIDAY to come!



Well out of high school & I'm still just going through the motions waiting for Friday to come!


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Suzi- hope your DH makes out OK!!!
> I was not into sports in high school........I was more
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
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> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
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> 
> 
> and
> 
> 
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> 
> 
> 
> 
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> 
> 
> and just going through the motions waiting for FRIDAY to come!


 
Aww thanks Madd. I'll be glad for him to have it over with because he's in so much pain and I hate seeing him go thru that on a daily basis. 
I found a new wine that I like. It's called "Lunetta". I thought it was like "Lunesta" the sleeping drug so I bought it thinking it would help me sleep. Yeah,um, that's why I bought it (Whew, you almost got me there!)  Lovely stuff but the bottle is just too small....or is my wine glass too big??? I only got 2 glasses out of the entire bottle! And DH didn't have any because he doesn't like the bubbly stuff like I do.
Thru out alot of my high school years I had 3 day weekends. I rarely went to school on Fridays, saying it was for "religious" reasons.  That's because I usually woke up on Friday morning saying "OMG, what did I do last night?"  My poor parents!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Suzi- hope your DH makes out OK!!!
> 
> 
> 
> WOW! You sure ARE the little athelete!
> 
> The only thing I remember winning was a 1st place ribbon in my first grade art show I think I got a few ribbons for a few science fair projects too.
> 
> I played some sports when I was younger and hated it. Was really good when playing with neighborhood kids- not on the actual field with other players that I did not know.
> 
> *I was not into sports in high school........I was more
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
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> 
> 
> and
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> and just going through the motions waiting for FRIDAY to come!*



After I wrote that I realized how bragging that sounded!! I was just good at sports and excelled at them. Except basketball. I couldn't play that worth a crap. 5ft 5in isn't exactly basketball material. I just worked hard at sports because I was good at them. 

I don't think anyone that went to school with me grew up deficient because they weren't good at sports. They just encouraged everyone to try hard at everything they did. Whether it be sports or academics or sticking beans up your nose. But you didn't get a trophy for participating. If that was the case I should have about 1000. 

All of the jocks in our high school were like your little dudes I bolded. Hey, it was the 70's.


----------



## KirklandTutu

LisaZee said:


> Why, oh WHY do I go read and post on That Sea of Judgement, AKA The Community Board?  Why?  Sigh.  Anyhoo...
> 
> I was reading Madd's post about how parents have screwed up sports for kids,



Go a few pages back and read the one about the middle schooler wanting to quit the Oboe.  hehehe

Seriously, though, I lie somewhere between teacher and coach for my profession.  The kids are easy to deal with, it's the parents who make me want to throw in the towel.

Hard to believe, but I'm missing all the kids while I'm laid up.  It's only been two weeks and I can't wait to get back to saying things like 'oh wow, Susie, I love how excited you are to dance, but remember we need to take turns so that everyone can get a chance to dance!'  *sigh*

I need a life.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> After I wrote that I realized how bragging that sounded!!



OMG- I would never think you were bragging!

You should be proud of your accomplishments!


----------



## Suzibrat

What's everyone up to this weekend? We are getting yet another round of snow, so I'm going to curl up with a bottle of wine and watch "Mr Bean's Holiday". Hope everyone has a great weekend!


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Hiding from tornadoes.


----------



## WDWguru

Suzibrat said:


> ... I'm going to curl up with a bottle of wine and watch "Mr Bean's Holiday"...



Ugh... HUGE fan of Mr Bean here but that movie was AWFUL imho. I hope you like it better than I did.

We'll be hiding from the hordes of families flocking to our downtown neighborhood for the St Patrick's Day parade. Our big entertainment will be to go out on our balcony and watch everyone react to their parking tickets afterward! "How DARE they ticket us for parking all day in a 2-hour spot/in front of this fire hydrant/wheelchair ramp? We were taking our kids to the PARADE!" Even at 11 stories up we can make out their reactions, and we provide our own dialogue. It's a bit like MST3K


----------



## Suzibrat

Aunt Michelle said:


> Hiding from tornadoes.


Oh no! I hope everything turns out well for you with no damage or injuries!!



WDWguru said:


> Ugh... HUGE fan of Mr Bean here but that movie was AWFUL imho. I hope you like it better than I did.
> 
> We'll be hiding from the hordes of families flocking to our downtown neighborhood for the St Patrick's Day parade. Our big entertainment will be to go out on our balcony and watch everyone react to their parking tickets afterward! "How DARE they ticket us for parking all day in a 2-hour spot/in front of this fire hydrant/wheelchair ramp? We were taking our kids to the PARADE!" Even at 11 stories up we can make out their reactions, and we provide our own dialogue. It's a bit like MST3K


 
I love the Mr. Bean series but wasn't crazy over the first movie either. In all honesty I don't hold out much hope for the second one, but stubborn person that I am rented it anyway.  
I love MST3K and have bought several of the episodes because I miss the series so much. I find myself doing dialogue MST3K-style thru out alot of movies now, which doesn;t exactly thrill DH.  My favorite thing to do is "translate" while he is watching "Tora, Tora, Tora". The movie takes on a whole new meaning when I get start in. I do get him laughing though...even though he hates to let me see him crack up when I say stuff like "I would like a cheeseburgers with pink sprinkles"


----------



## KirklandTutu

Aunt Michelle said:


> Hiding from tornadoes.



I'm originally from just south of Atlanta and a great deal of my friends now live, work, and of course, play downtown.  The news says that theres no fatalities, but looking at some of those homes and lofts...and all the falling glass...it's hard to imagine that only 30 people were injured. 

I may not be there, but I'm freaking out with you!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Aunt Michelle said:


> Hiding from tornadoes.




Hope you are OK!

DH and I went to watch my niece and nephew (6 and 3) do and Easter Egg hunt. OMG- there were 100s of parents and kids- it way crazy. Of course, I was just there to see those 2- Well actually it was not even a HUNT- they had all the eggs laying in the middle of a few different fields- they had broken the kids up into age groups. They had all the kids go onto the field and make a circle around the eggs and then they just ran to pick them up- not very challenging if you ask me 

I just gave my niece some advice on how to get more eggs (go pass all the kids and go right for the middle first - it worked- she was the only one in the middle for a while scooping up eggs ) and I then moved myself away from the situation and sat up on the bleachers.  

Way too much anxiety for me!


----------



## bumb7ebee

Sounds like a good plan at times - one of my bosses has no kids and he and his wife seem to have a wonderful life with great holidays and total freedom to do what they want, when they want.

It's all about priorities.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

KirklandTutu said:


> I'm originally from just south of Atlanta and a great deal of my friends now live, work, and of course, play downtown.  The news says that theres no fatalities, but looking at some of those homes and lofts...and all the falling glass...it's hard to imagine that only 30 people were injured.
> 
> I may not be there, but I'm freaking out with you!!!





maddhatir said:


> Hope you are OK!



Just checking in to let you guys know that I'm fine, fortunately. Sky is clear and blue today.


----------



## Hixski

Aunt Michelle said:


> Just checking in to let you guys know that I'm fine, fortunately. Sky is clear and blue today.



Glad to know everything is ok. We live in part of tornado alley too. Our season usually starts in April around here. 

I was in a tornado when I was in 1st grade. It took the roof off our elementary school and leveled most of the homes near the school. We were off school for around 3 weeks while they repaired the damage. My parents home had some roof damage and our big elm tree ended up being uprooted and laying across the street up to our neighbors front door. My father was at work at McDonnell Douglas at the airport at the time and watched it go towards our subdivision. My mother had already dragged us to the basement. I have been close enough to see 3 tornadoes since then.


----------



## Suzibrat

WDWguru said:


> Ugh... HUGE fan of Mr Bean here but that movie was AWFUL imho. I hope you like it better than I did.


You were right...we didn't make it through 30 minutes of the movie before I say "enough's enough!" What a shame......


----------



## WDWguru

At least you only wasted 30 minutes. I was on a plane and out of desperation watched the whole darn thing!


----------



## Suzibrat

WDWguru said:


> At least you only wasted 30 minutes. I was on a plane and out of desperation watched the whole darn thing!


Oh, do I feel for you!! I'm surprised it didn't put you to sleep! I was running it in fast forward because there wasn't any dialogue really. The only part that had me laughing was when he was dancing to get money. It was all downhill from there (JMO).


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Just a little Irish for you today...   

*An Old Irish Blessing *
May love and laughter light your days,
and warm your heart and home.
May good and faithful friends be yours,
wherever you may roam.
May peace and plenty bless your world
with joy that long endures.
May all life's passing seasons
bring the best to you and yours!


----------



## Suzibrat

Aunt Michelle said:


> Just a little Irish for you today...
> 
> *An Old Irish Blessing *
> May love and laughter light your days,
> and warm your heart and home.
> May good and faithful friends be yours,
> wherever you may roam.
> May peace and plenty bless your world
> with joy that long endures.
> May all life's passing seasons
> bring the best to you and yours!


Happy St Patrick's Day to you Aunt Michelle and all the rest here! I have corned beef and cabbage in the crock pot and guess what the house smells like? (It isn't fragrant i can tell you that much! )


----------



## Hixski

We are going to get our corned beef and cabbage from our favorite neighborhood bar and grill. It's a tradition. I don't think we have missed but maybe a year or two in 20 yrs.  We are heading out in about an hour or so. Hopefully there won't be too many drunks yet. There shouldn't be any screaming toddlers either.  We will leave long before the idiot drunks get going. 

Happy St. Patricks Day Everyone!!


----------



## Liisa

Knock, Knock, Knock.... Helloooooo?  Where did everyone go?  Too much ale for St Patty's??

My Khabo had his ortho appt last night.  Knee surgery scheduled for 
April 2nd.  Poor little guy.  But I love the ortho vet.  Real nice guy (most of the vet specialists we have to deal with have been ego jerks).  Not this guy.  And he does over 200 knee surgeries a year - so to him, it's routine.  Makes me feel confident that Khabo will get fixed.

Kirklandtutu - get back over to your trip report - that is what I've been reading on my lunch break, so you need to keep it going!


----------



## maddhatir

I am still here! Seems like a lot of people kind of "scattered" after the "invasion".

Not much going on in my part of the country. Just working and not much else. 

Didn't do anything on St Patty's day. It's not my idea of a fun time to try and squeeze into a bar with 1000s of drunk people to drink green beer. I would probably have to hurt someone! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




DH works down the street from an Irish pub- on the way home on St Patty's Day he said there was a line just to get in! They had to wait until some people came out for more to go in! No thanks! 

That is great that Khabo is getting surgery and hopefully will be fixed!


----------



## Hixski

I survived St. Patricks Day!!! We were home long before the idiot drunks were in full force. We never drink the green beer. It just turns your teeth and lips a funky greenish color. Pirate looking teeth only look like they belong on pirates.

I think some folks are still afraid of our thread. They think we are going to go all militant CF or something.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Still here - sulking about the crappy weather, but still here.  I'm _soooo _ready for spring & some nice, sunny, warm days!

Liisa - good news about Khabo.  Having a good vet is half the battle.  I'll have my fingers crossed that surgery goes well.

If I may revert back to the hockey topic for just a moment- I like the Sweedish Twins spot better, but this is pretty cute too. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0kymzcRpeE&feature=related


----------



## LisaZee

I'm still here, too!    Practicing my weekly birth control - aka watching "Supernanny"!  Good grief...


----------



## KirklandTutu

Liisa said:


> Kirklandtutu - get back over to your trip report - that is what I've been reading on my lunch break, so you need to keep it going!



ok! ok! 

lol


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Still here! Been very busy. Hope everyone is doing ok.


----------



## Suzibrat

Happy Spring Everyone!!!  
I'm here. Just trying to get the house all spiffed up and things ready for the Easter. (I don't celebrate it in the religious sense-just love making a big dinner and the traditional Chocolate Peanut Butter Pie). It's pouring here, which I prefer to the snow that we are expecting tomorrow. (Only 2 inches so no big deal but it IS Spring now!)
Liisa-hope Khabo's surgery goes well. Sounds like you have an awesome Vet!
Have a good Day everyone!


----------



## maddhatir

My SIL is having Easter dinner (I do not celebrate it either) at her house, but she wants to do it on Saturday. She just does not want a big mess Sunday night and have to go to work on Monday- which I understand- I like doing things on Saturdays too- this way you have Sunday to rest up.

Anywho- DH and I have a surprise party to go to on Saturday so, darn, we will miss dinner. I am not into having holiday dinners just b/c it is a holiday (and holidays that I do not even celebrate!  )

My BIL said, then come over on Sunday for brunch. I said- JUST b/c it is Easter- does NOT mean I need to see you! I see you all the time- it just seems hypocritical to me- I bet if I asked him WHY he is celebrating Easter- he would not have a clue, and most of the people at the table would not either.  

Sorry for ranting- I just set myself off!


----------



## Liisa

Raining here.... seems like it rains almost everyday.  How depressing.  At least if it were snow, it would be pretty, and clean, and white.  Instead I spend my evening wiping off big dirty doggy paws.  Ohhhh, and squishy earth is the BEST stuff to dig in!!!   

We are heading to my MIL for Easter.  But I'm thrilled - she's Italian and a lazy cook (I know - the two just don't go together).  So normally we have frozen (yup, from the freezer section of the grocery store) manicotti.  This year she is actually making turkey and ham.  Whoo Hoo!!!  Of course, now I'm complaining because the side dishes will all be canned (I'm offering to bring fresh peas with tarragon and potato au gratin to have something fresh).  DH says I'm never happy....  I prefer to think I'm just refined in my food choices!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Suzibrat said:


> ...and the traditional Chocolate Peanut Butter Pie




Mmmmmm...  Chocolate Peanut Butter Pie!

I'm gaining weight just thinking about it


----------



## Mrs.Reese

Thought I would add this to the extremely long thread.  DH calls me on my way home to inform me that he never wants kids.  Pretty strange considering the man wanted four when we got married.  I ask him what happened.  He says on the pre-k students pooped on him!  My snarky little mind asked him what he was wearing if the shirt was ruined.  His response "some kid shirt."  I almost drove off the road...


----------



## Suzibrat

zima-cheryl said:


> Mmmmmm... Chocolate Peanut Butter Pie!
> 
> I'm gaining weight just thinking about it


It can actually be made into a low fat version....not that I'm doing it that way but it can be done! LOL I make it because it is wicked easy, fast, and like heaven on a plate.


----------



## zima-cheryl

WDWguru said:


> For you guys who like the 40s music, have you checked out the Puppini Sisters? Their site (www.thepuppinisisters.com) takes forever to load but it's all done in 40s style, with pinup cards and everything. Their music is like the Andrews Sisters covering 70s and 80s hits! They do the coolest version of Walk Like an Egyptian! Definitely check them out if you like that kind of thing.



I just checked I-Tunes and would you believe that is one of the free downloads for this week?!?


----------



## PhotobearSam

thank God it's less than an inch but I am getting tired of this.

DH works all weekend and I have customers...It's going to be Pizza for us.


----------



## Liisa

Suzi -

You really need to post that recipe... or at leat PM me with it!  DH LOVES peanut butter and chocolate!   

Or - you can just send me over directions to your place and I'll be there to help you devour it!   

Liisa


----------



## WDWguru

zima-cheryl said:


> I just checked I-Tunes and would you believe that is one of the free downloads for this week?!?



Cool! I have the CD already but thanks for the info!


----------



## Suzibrat

Liisa said:


> Suzi -
> 
> You really need to post that recipe... or at leat PM me with it! DH LOVES peanut butter and chocolate!
> 
> Or - you can just send me over directions to your place and I'll be there to help you devour it!
> 
> Liisa


Ok Liisa, just for you.... 

*Chocolate Peanut Butter Pie*
*1 graham cracker or Oreo pie crust*
*2 small boxes of Chocolate Cook & Serve Pudding *
*3 1/2 cups milk*
*1 cup peanut butter*

*Stir together milk and pudding and cook in the microwave, stirring every 2 minutes, until thick and bubbling. Stir in Peanut butter till melted and smooth. Pour into pie crust and chill till set. There will be some filling left over. You can put this in a bowl and hide it for yourself for later on.  *

That's all there is too it! You can put whipped cream on it if you like too. Enjoy!!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Suzibrat said:


> Ok Liisa, just for you....
> 
> *Chocolate Peanut Butter Pie*
> *1 graham cracker or Oreo pie crust*
> *2 small boxes of Chocolate Cook & Serve Pudding *
> *3 3/4 cups milk*
> *1 cup peanut butter*
> 
> *Stir together milk and pudding and cook in the microwave, stirring every 2 minutes, until thick and bubbling. Stir in Peanut butter till melted and smooth. Pour into pie crust and chill till set. There will be some filling left over. You can put this in a bowl and hide it for yourself for later on.  *
> 
> That's all there is too it! You can put whipped cream on it if you like too. Enjoy!!




You weren't kidding that is easy; I can't wait to try it.
Thanks!


----------



## Suzibrat

PhotobearSam said:


> thank God it's less than an inch but I am getting tired of this.
> 
> DH works all weekend and I have customers...It's going to be Pizza for us.


I'll take a piece of that pizza Sam! Hope you have a good weekend!


----------



## tennvalgirl

LisaZee said:


> I'm still here, too!    Practicing my weekly birth control - aka watching "Supernanny"!  Good grief...




 

There was an episode 2 weeks ago about a woman with 7 children under the age of 10!


----------



## ReaderGirl

Hi everyone!   

My hubbie and I couldn't have kids, (yes, I saw the other thread, too) *but* I enjoy chatting both with adults who couldn't have them and adults who chose not to have them.  In our case, we felt it wasn't worth going through the total life upheaval to try to further puruse having children, and we're comfortable with our lives.  

I find it hard sometimes to find other adults who don't have kids!  We're in our forties, and yes, we still get the questions.  As I said, the choice was made for us, but I wholeheartedly believe in going with what you've got, and looking on the bright side!

We can live the lives we choose, we're free to go anywhere, do what we want, and focus on personal goals (in my case, fitness, or at least attempts at it, reading, helping animals, etc.).   

I think visiting Disney makes me yearn for a child *less*.  Those parents often do not look like they're having fun!

I know people who have children and adore them; they're happy, and I'm happy for them.  But I also know people who have kids and seem resentful at not getting their own needs met.  We can't always have it all, and though it does have challenges, I'm definitely planning on a great kidless life.   

Thought I'd say "Hi",
ReaderGirl

P.S.  If there's ever an adults without kids "meet" at Disney, I'd love to know about it!


----------



## maddhatir

ReaderGirl said:


> Hi everyone!
> 
> I find it hard sometimes to find other adults who don't have kids!  Thought I'd say "Hi",
> ReaderGirl



Welcome! 

I agree about not finding many people without kids. I have just grown so used to not having any- I assume other people feel the same as I do- but that is not the case. If someone asks me if I have kids- I usually comment with a long,  "_Nooooooooooo_" They seem startled by my response and I forget and think to myself- _Oh, you must have kids_ 

The last couple we knew without kids are now pregnant! 

I love the comment DH and I get sometimes from my BIL about random things (he has 2 kids) "_Must be nice_" ......ummm, yes, it is. That is why we made this choice. It IS very nice. What does he want me to say- HE made the decision to have kids! Why make that comment to us?


----------



## Suzibrat

Just checking in to say good morning to you all. DH's surgery went well but he's in alot of pain. I've been busy helping him and doing the everyday stuff as well. He's really been in a good mood despite the pain. I'm off to get a pot of sauce started because he wants lasagna for dinner. Hope you all have a good day!


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## zima-cheryl

Suzibrat said:


> Just checking in to say good morning to you all. DH's surgery went well but he's in alot of pain. I've been busy helping him and doing the everyday stuff as well. He's really been in a good mood despite the pain. I'm off to get a pot of sauce started because he wants lasagna for dinner. Hope you all have a good day!



Glad it went well.  The fact he is hungry is a good sign! Eating will help him keep his strength up.

(And kudos to you for stepping up & taking care of everything while he's out of commission.)


----------



## Suzibrat

zima-cheryl said:


> Glad it went well. The fact he is hungry is a good sign! Eating will help him keep his strength up.
> 
> (And kudos to you for stepping up & taking care of everything while he's out of commission.)


Aww, ty. I'm glad I can help him out. I have fibromyalgia so there are plenty of times when the shoe is on the other foot. Not martyr like or anything it just feels good to be able to do what needs to be done, even though the weather is screwing with my fibro big time right now. Think I'll go to a body shop for an overhaul


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Aww, ty. I'm glad I can help him out. I have fibromyalgia so there are plenty of times when the shoe is on the other foot. Not martyr like or anything it just feels good to be able to do what needs to be done, even though the weather is screwing with my fibro big time right now. Think I'll go to a body shop for an overhaul



Just pass this along to DH- PAIN MEDS!  Hope he is feeling better soon!

Hey Suzi- my SIL was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia last year! When it gets bad- she is out of commision for a long time!

The sad thing is- she had to sell her Harley! She does not feel confident anymore that she has the strength to hold it up- or even grip the handles! 

The good thing- she can still ride on the back of her DHs bike- but she enjoyed riding her own so much!


----------



## maddhatir

OMG I am watching Seinfeld and I love this!

_[Elaine is visiting her friend Vivian.] 

Vivian: Elaine, I'm so glad you came out. 

Elaine: Yeah... 

Vivian: You haven't seen Jimmy for years. 

Elaine: I know, I'm glad I got to see him before he hit puberty and got, you know all lurchy and awkward. 

Vivian: Actually, I'm gonna need someone to look after him tomorrow evening. 

Elaine: Tomorrow evening, sure. 

Vivian: Do you know anyone responsible? 

Elaine: Do I know anyone?? 

Vivian: Well, if you think of anybody, give me a call. _

Elaine gets upset.......

_[Monk's Cafe. Jerry and Elaine.]_

_Elaine: Can you believe that, Vivian doesn't think I'm responsible? 

Jerry: Who wants to responsible? When ever anything goes wrong, the first thing they ask is: who's responsible for this? 

*Elaine: I couldn't raise a kid? Come on, I love bossing people around*. _

[Elaine comes into Jerry's.] 

_Elaine: Vivian left me a message. I guess a certain someone changed her mind about whether someone was responsible enough to watch certain other someone. 

*Jerry: Is this about me? 

Elaine: No. 

Jerry: Oh, then I lost interest*. _

The bolded parts crack me up! 

The last part is so me- _It's all about ME_!


----------



## Hixski

Suzibrat said:


> Aww, ty. I'm glad I can help him out. I have fibromyalgia so there are plenty of times when the shoe is on the other foot. Not martyr like or anything it just feels good to be able to do what needs to be done, even though the weather is screwing with my fibro big time right now. Think I'll go to a body shop for an overhaul



Glad everything is ok and he is not feeling too bad. He will probably need some pain meds but those are always good once in a while.


----------



## Suzibrat

Dh *has* got some heavy duty pain meds, that's why he's been such a sweetheart thru all this...because he's knocked out half the time   I think he was expecting to be feeling 100% by now and I keep telling him that the doctor wouldn't have given him 3 weeks off from work if that was the case. Then there is the start of fishing season in a few days, so he is getting nervous that he will miss it...

*A Correction to the recipe I posted... it should have read 3 1/2 cups of milk and not 3 3/4...i corrected my original post.*

Madd, I have had this stupid Fibro since 1998 and there are days when the pain just knocks me flat. I have a stick shift in my car and it is torture to drive it on a bad day. But for the most part I do really good. I'm always going to be in pain of some sort and that was one of the toughest things to learn to live with. What a shame that your SIL had to sell her Harley! I can understand why she did it though.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Suzibrat said:


> Dh *has* got some heavy duty pain meds, that's why he's been such a sweetheart thru all this...because he's knocked out half the time




Better living through chemistry!


----------



## maddhatir

Guess what Suzi???

I just got off the phone with my brother- he called me to see if I wanted free tix to Dimmu Borgir  

They are going to be at a club in Philly. My brother's friend is in a band. The band's lead singer bartends at the club and he can get them free tix. My brother called me b/c he said I would love them since I like Marilyn.

They are going to be with Behemeth.

I have to check with DH to see if he wants to go.


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Guess what Suzi???
> 
> I just got off the phone with my brother- he called me to see if I wanted free tix to Dimmu Borgir
> 
> They are going to be at a club in Philly. My brother's friend is in a band. The band's lead singer bartends at the club and he can get them free tix. My brother called me b/c he said I would love them since I like Marilyn.
> 
> They are going to be with Behemeth.
> 
> I have to check with DH to see if he wants to go.


*Go Go Go!!!!!!!!    And please take some pics of Dimmu Borgir for me, especially the singer...hot little number, he is! Behemoth is pretty good too but I would be there just to see those satan worshipping bad boys in Dimmu  *


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *Go Go Go!!!!!!!!    And please take some pics of Dimmu Borgir for me, especially the singer...hot little number, he is! Behemoth is pretty good too but I would be there just to see those satan worshipping bad boys in Dimmu  *



The place is small- so if we do go, I will bring the camera that I had when I took the pics of Marilyn- it has a pretty good zoom. 

If we go- I will be sitting upstairs. They have no seats downstairs- I may be killed in the mosh pit


----------



## Suzibrat

zima-cheryl said:


> Better living through chemistry!


    I laughed so hard and loud I woke him up....gotta love the minds that come up with these little helpers in pill form 

DH had a pretty good day today and even went out with me for a bit. Our coffeemaker bit the big one this morning (thankfully it was after it had brewed 12 cups, whew!) so I had to make a trip to Wally World and he wanted to come along. The roads here are full of frost heaves (sounds like what a snowman does when he drinks to much ice wine) and pot holes so I drove as carefully as I could. He had ulterior motives, he wanted some new fishing gear to make himself feel better.   I settled for a new coffeemaker and a game for my Wii. Some of friends came by to visit him after they got off work so he's had a really full day but a good one as well. 
I hope you have all had a good day as well.


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Hi everyone!


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> The place is small- so if we do go, I will bring the camera that I had when I took the pics of Marilyn- it has a pretty good zoom.
> 
> If we go- I will be sitting upstairs. They have no seats downstairs- I may be killed in the mosh pit


I avoid mosh pits as well. My idea of a good show is not one where I could leave with broken bones! The drummer of Dimmu is awesome. I could go on and on about my love and facination of double bass drumming and Hellhammer (DB's drummer, not the band Hellhammer) is right up there at the top of my list. I hope you get to go!



Aunt Michelle said:


> Hi everyone!


Hey Michelle! What's up in your neck of the woods????

I woke up to find a bunch of turkeys milling about on my yard! I was tempted to to run after them with some bread cubes yelling "who wants to get stuffed!!" but I didn't have enough java in me yet.  Where were they at Thanksgiving time???
It's a beautiful day here today. Gonna throw a coffee pot roast in the crock pot and do a bunch of housework and errands. The fun never ends huh? Hope you all have a great day!!!


----------



## Barthy73

Hello everyone,

I've posted in this forum before, but it's been a LONG time.  My wife and I childfree and love every minute of it!  When we're out and experience the "joys" of others' children, we always respond the same way, "Thank you, Dr. Rice."  As you might guess, Dr. Rice took care of getting me fixed!

My dog won't get knocked up, won't ask for money, doesn't want a driver's license, and definitely won't be going to college.  Life is good!

While I was catching up on posts from the past several months, a co-worker brought her new baby to the office.  She'd tried to have a baby for a long time but was unable and was blessed with an adoption.  I'm truly happy for them, and I love kids--as long as they're not mine and can go home when I'm tired of them!


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> Hello everyone,
> 
> I've posted in this forum before, but it's been a LONG time.  My wife and I childfree and love every minute of it!  When we're out and experience the "joys" of others' children, we always respond the same way, "Thank you, Dr. Rice."  As you might guess, Dr. Rice took care of getting me fixed!
> 
> My dog won't get knocked up, won't ask for money, doesn't want a driver's license, and definitely won't be going to college.  Life is good!
> 
> While I was catching up on posts from the past several months, a co-worker brought her new baby to the office.  She'd tried to have a baby for a long time but was unable and was blessed with an adoption.  I'm truly happy for them, and I love kids--as long as they're not mine and can go home when I'm tired of them!




Welcome back!


----------



## maddhatir

Aunt Michelle said:


> Hi everyone!



Hi Michelle! 

How have you been??

Boy- I can't wait for the weather to get warmer- I want to bring my laptop out on our back porch and work from there- Thank goodness for Go to my PC!!!! I connect right to my work desktop!

I have a feeling that will not be for a few months though. 

Suzi how is your DH doing??? Hopefully still "chemically pain free" 

Guess what?- DH said yes to Dimmu! Next Friday is the date. I have to call my brother and tell him to hook me up with the tix! I am always surprised when I go to some of my concerts how many "older"  people (my age and even older) are there! 

I would think a lot of the shows I go to that there would be a bunch of young kids- but that is not the case. I am sure if it was an all day even kinda thing I would see more kids. They love those things. 

My favorite thing to do when I go to these kinds of concerts is, of course, watch the band, but the mosh pit is a show in itself!


----------



## PhotobearSam

Barthy73 said:


> Hello everyone,
> 
> I've posted in this forum before, but it's been a LONG time.  My wife and I childfree and love every minute of it!  When we're out and experience the "joys" of others' children, we always respond the same way, "Thank you, Dr. Rice."  As you might guess, Dr. Rice took care of getting me fixed!
> 
> My dog won't get knocked up, won't ask for money, doesn't want a driver's license, and definitely won't be going to college.  Life is good!
> 
> While I was catching up on posts from the past several months, a co-worker brought her new baby to the office.  She'd tried to have a baby for a long time but was unable and was blessed with an adoption.  I'm truly happy for them, and I love kids--as long as they're not mine and can go home when I'm tired of them!




Welcome back...

DH and I also thank the Vasectomy Doc that helped us out.
As you stated, we are happy for people we know when they get pregnant or adopt but we also always end our talks about it with "Better them than us".

I am getting really sick of people saying, "Oh, you'll change your mind." Ummm, no I won't. I'm almost 36, we have been together for 10 years and DH is fixed, why would you think I will change my mind??? is what I answer them. I just don't understand why it's anyone else's business at all...It's not.

I do love my nieces and we spoil them rotten but I have known since an early age that I did not want kids. When all my friends were playing with dolls, I played "Run my own business" and NOW I DO!!! Isn't it weird how that works.

I have always wanted to flip the tables and when someone who has asked me this awful question before, when they say "We are trying to have a baby" and I would love to then say to them "I would wait if I were you...You are bound to change your mind" That way, they could see how disrespectful and rude their question is when they ask us.

I love WDW and plan on a DCL cruise so I don't hate kids, but I do hate out of control kids. Thankfully we only saw one on our last trip in December (12 days in Orlando parks each day) I think that was awesome. 
The one we saw was truly out of control and screamed at the top of her lungs for 45 minutes while her Dad laughed at her while he ate a meal sitting 4 tables away from us at AK...He looked at us and said "She's always like this, she won't stop". What did we 5 adults do?   Had our meal and talked and tried not to let it affect us. We decided it was a Story we could tell later and it just made all other children's actions that week seem small in comparison.  It did not ruin our meal it added to it. (Now if I would have been at Boma's instead of Flame Tree, maybe I would have felt different.

People who have kids don't think that we get discriminated against, or talked down to because we don't have kids...but we do. It's nothing we can't handle, but it's annoying.

I just say to each his own and what is good for you might not be good for me...


Welcome back to this thread. We need new blood around...

I wish I was cooler so I could keep up with the current music scene but I am not cool...Are you cool?

God, how I wish I was...


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> I wish I was cooler so I could keep up with the current music scene but I am not cool...Are you cool?
> 
> God, how I wish I was...



Actually the "mainstream" would refer to us as ....weird....not cool! 

But I _PREFER_ weird!


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Actually the "mainstream" would refer to us as ....weird....not cool!
> 
> But I _PREFER_ weird!


Headbanging freaks is what we are...and proud of it!!! \m/  \m/
I'm so glad you're going to see Dimmu ...and a tad jealous of course. Shall I lend you a bib in case there are any drooling issues? (Probably just me that has those types of issues, huh?) 
 Dh is doing really good today...still sleeping alot, which is ok with me because I have a ton of stuff to do around here to get caught up. Where did the week go?

Good to see you Barthy!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hello my peeps!   Oh, it is after Easter isn't it?  

I'm busy, busy, busy here at work today but I needed to take a mental break.  A lot of politicin' (and I don't mean election '08  ) has been going on around here lately and I will be so very glad for the weekend to get here.  Of course I have no exciting plans. . . I am so boring.

Suzibrat::  I'll have to do some reading to catch up with what's going on w/ your DH.  I've been a little MIA  Work has been busy and I've just been too tired to play.

Sam::  Thanks for sharing your story!  I don't think I've ever heard yours.  Mine is floating around here somewhere.

Well, I guess I will get back to work.  Just wanted to stop in and say hi.  

By the way,  Barthy  Glad to see someone from my neck of the woods.


----------



## Liisa

Hi All...

Suzi - better late than never, but I owe you a THANK YOU! for the recipe. 

I woke up Saturday with a slight cough.  By Saturday afternoon, I was stuffy, coughing, fever, miserable...  It completely kicked my butt until yesterday when I finally started to get back on top of things.  I hate coming back to work and unburying myself.  I called my Dr. on monday hoping for some nice chemicals to fix me up.  She assessed that it was a viral infection and just need to run its course.  What the heck!?!?  GIVE ME MEDICINE!!!   

Anyway, just wanted to check back in.  

Photobear - I'm with you on the music scene.  Suzi and Madd speak a different language there!  I'm sooooo not cool!


----------



## ReaderGirl

Maddhatir, thanks for the warm welcome!   

Like you, my husband and I have heard the envious comments.  Usually it's something about our being able to spend a little money on ourselves.  While the decision to not have kids was made for us, we plan on making the best of it!!   

I think Disney is a great place to be kidless, but I'm a bit of a kid myself.  I love all the sweet Magic Kingdom stuff.  The last time we were in Disney, we tried a behind the scenes tour (Keys to the Kingdom) and thought it was terrific.  I recommend it highly.  I'd like to try another behind the scenes tour on our next trip.  There are so many other things we haven't seen and want to try, like the Adventurer's Club, and the water parks -- we'll have fun checking them off our list.

Everyone have a great day.  
Liisa, I like your dog photo!
Reader Girl


----------



## Suzibrat

Liisa, I hope you feel better soon! Even though you weren't given any "helpers" from the Dr.

ForTheLoveofDisney, I wondered where you had disappeared to. Hope things slow down so you can come out and play more often.

Readergirl, great to have you with us!!! Welcome!

I'm sitting here watching the bloody stupid snow fall.   Yesterday it was so beautiful here. Warm, sunny, I spent the afternoon having an extended "happy hour" on the deck while DH slept  Today I'll get to use my time to shovel snow. Will it ever end????? 

Madd, I saw Behemoth on a vid, on Headbanger's Ball and the guy playing guitar had something that looked like a glittery cat toy in his hair behind his ear.  I was in hysterics. I'll keep my dark purple streaks and forego the cat toys thank you very much!
Everyone have a great day! Hope the sun shines on you!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> I woke up Saturday with a slight cough.  By Saturday afternoon, I was stuffy, coughing, fever, miserable...  It completely kicked my butt until yesterday when I finally started to get back on top of things.  I hate coming back to work and unburying myself.  I called my Dr. on monday hoping for some nice chemicals to fix me up.  She assessed that it was a viral infection and just need to run its course.  What the heck!?!?  GIVE ME MEDICINE!!!



Hey Liisa- Hope you are at least feeling a little better today!!! 

OMG- Everyone here!!!!! Have any of you seen the new HBO George Carlin special "It's Bad for Ya" !!!!!????

I WAS FREAKIN' PEEING!!!!!! and I only saw about a half our of it! I have to watch the rest ON DEMAND! (FYI- if you have been a Geoge fan forever- you will not believe how much he has aged! But still funny as ever)

He is SO dead on with everything I believe in (kids, stupid people, people on the phone)

He does a great schpeel on kids and their obnoxios NAZI parents! It is AWESOME! Wait until you hear his comment about "kid's being our future" !!!

So 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




 to everyone who thinks we are the only ones who feel the way we do!!!

IF GEORGE SAYS IT- IT MUST BE TRUE!


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Madd, I saw Behemoth on a vid, on Headbanger's Ball and the guy playing guitar had something that looked like a glittery cat toy in his hair behind his ear.  I was in hysterics. I'll keep my dark purple streaks and forego the cat toys thank you very much!
> Everyone have a great day! Hope the sun shines on you!



Suzi I love your new siggy- that freakin' kitty is freakin' hilarious!

And I notice you are never in the same place twice! (your location under your screen name!)


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Hey Liisa- Hope you are at least feeling a little better today!!!
> 
> OMG- Everyone here!!!!! Have any of you seen the new HBO George Carlin special "It's Bad for Ya" !!!!!????
> 
> I WAS FREAKIN' PEEING!!!!!! and I only saw about a half our of it! I have to watch the rest ON DEMAND! (FYI- if you have been a Geoge fan forever- you will not believe how much he has aged! But still funny as ever)
> 
> He is SO dead on with everything I believe in (kids, stupid people, people on the phone)
> 
> He does a great schpeel on kids and their obnoxios NAZI parents! It is AWESOME! Wait until you hear his comment about "kid's being our future" !!!
> 
> So
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> to everyone who thinks we are the only ones who feel the way we do!!!
> 
> IF GEORGE SAYS IT- IT MUST BE TRUE!




yes! DH and I watched it last weekend on Demand...we couldn't believe how old he finally looks. it was crazy...but we were finding ourselves agreeing with him a lot...as we usually do...loved it!


----------



## Liisa

Feeling a bit better - finally got a good nights sleep last night.  What a difference that makes.

Of course, now I've been on hold for 20 min with the UK trying to close out two of my Company's bank accounts that we no longer use.  UGH!  The guy was super helpful... just pop on into a branch and we can take care of this for you.   Ummmm... hello?!!  I'm in the US!!!  Definitely not popping into a banch anytime soon.  Oh... and instead of elevator music, they are playing all these 80's songs which, given my congestion, are starting to give me a headache.  

Suzi, how's your hubby doing?  I can't believe you are still getting snow!  YUCK!!!  Of course, I'd take that over the dreary, gray rainy days we've been having.  Depressing....


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> I avoid mosh pits as well. My idea of a good show is not one where I could leave with broken bones! The drummer of Dimmu is awesome. I could go on and on about my love and facination of double bass drumming and *Hellhammer (DB's drummer, not the band Hellhammer)* is right up there at the top of my list. I hope you get to go!



Suzi- just on the Dimmu website and I read this:

_The 24-show trek will launch on April 2nd in Toronto, Ontario, Canada and will end on May 4th in Chicago, IL. 
*Drummer Tony Laureano will continue to handle drum duties, as the 2007 injury suffered by Hellhammer still has him sidelined*_

I wonder if I will get to see Hellhammer in action??

Ya know, I have to stare at your siggy everytime I see one of your posts- there is nothing sexier than a dude, hair flying and banging his head.....or banging on the drums!- 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




OK- Nothing sexier- EXCEPT for JD! Now If JD would just do a little headbanging I would be speachless. That, or, I need to see a pic of him ridng a Harley with no helmet and hair blowin' in the wind! It would be the death of me for sure!


.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

ReaderGirl said:


> Maddhatir, thanks for the warm welcome!
> 
> Like you, my husband and I have heard the envious comments.  Usually it's something about our being able to spend a little money on ourselves.  While the decision to not have kids was made for us, we plan on making the best of it!!
> 
> I think Disney is a great place to be kidless, but I'm a bit of a kid myself.  I love all the sweet Magic Kingdom stuff.  The last time we were in Disney, we tried a behind the scenes tour (Keys to the Kingdom) and thought it was terrific.  I recommend it highly.  I'd like to try another behind the scenes tour on our next trip.  There are so many other things we haven't seen and want to try, like the Adventurer's Club, and the water parks -- we'll have fun checking them off our list.
> 
> Everyone have a great day.
> Liisa, I like your dog photo!
> Reader Girl


Hey Reader Girl  So glad you stopped by.  We too had the decision made for us but HONEST  TOO  GOODNESS it's feeling more and more like the RIGHT thing!!!!!!  Seriously, we were in Burger King the other day trying to catch a quick meal ----FYI for all my fellow vegetarians  Burger King sells a VEGGIE burger  ---- anyway I'm trying to hold a conversation w/ DH about my day at work and this kid just kept letting out these loud random, screaching screams, for fun it seemed  I was just like "GET  ME  OUT  OF  HERE!!" It was like nails on a chalkboard.  Now, *contrary to the popular belief* that's been floating around in places about the Marrieds choosing not to have kids HATING kids, I don't.  I have (honestly I've lost count) 17 or 19 nieces and nephews.  I love them.  I like spending time with them.  I like buying them things and doing things with them.     AND I like sending them home.  It's just like DH and I have gotten settled in a no kids life.  We sleep in on weekends and days off, we like to be spontaneous and run out for a bite to eat or running to a town several hours away.  We've become selfish with our time.  So, like you, while the decision was made for us we're ok with it and embracing it.  I choose not to hang out on the Marrieds NOT choosing boards because it seemed to me (and I could be VERY wrong like people have been about us) in the several posts I read people were still trying and pining away over children and I don't want to be in that place.  I want to be with people who are embracing the life they've been given and having fun along the way.  Like I said, I could be wrong and I'd hate to pass judgement without fulling reading the entire thread but I remember being in a place where I was angry/sad/depressed/emotional/upset about not being able to have children and my conversations and actions gravitated towards that end and I don't want to be there anymore and quite frankly, I don't want to be around other people who are that way.  Is it like that over there?  ANYWAY, sorry for the novel, glad you found us!!  Stick around.



maddhatir said:


> IF GEORGE SAYS IT- IT MUST BE TRUE!


 Ain't that the truth!!  



Liisa said:


> Feeling a bit better - finally got a good nights sleep last night.  What a difference that makes.


Liisa, glad to hear you're feeling better.  I had that mess back at the beginning of February.  I was out of work 4 days from it.  On a side note, besides their stupidness in this situation, don't you just love British accents??  

Nothing going on here today at work.  My boss isn't here, half the faculty aren't here and I'm just bored out of my gourd!! Thank goodness I have the DIS!!

Like I said, no big plans for the weekend.  

Talk to you later.


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Feeling a bit better - finally got a good nights sleep last night.  What a difference that makes.
> 
> Ummmm... hello?!!  I'm in the US!!!  Definitely not popping into a branch anytime soon.  Oh... and instead of elevator music, they are playing all these 80's songs which, given my congestion, are starting to give me a headache.



Glad to hear you slept well.

I have a suggestion for the bank problem. Tell your boss the bank said it is mandatory for you to come into a branch to close the accounts and you need to hop on a plane to the UK ASAP!!!! 

I SO want to go to the UK! DH does not have a desire to. I would not care to much to visit London- maybe one day- but I would rather do a lot of the countrysides! 

Actually I think I said this here before- I would prefer to move there and become a citizen- not too happy with our government the past (ummmm 8 years ) I would say, I am kind of ashamed what they have done to this country- OMG- but that is a whole other matter!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

maddhatir said:


> Glad to hear you slept well.
> 
> I have a suggestion for the bank problem. Tell your boss the bank said it is mandatory for you to come into a branch to close the accounts and you need to hop on a plane to the UK ASAP!!!!
> 
> I SO want to go to the UK! DH does not have a desire to. I would not care to much to visit London- maybe one day- but I would rather do a lot of the countrysides!
> 
> Actually I think I said this here before- I would prefer to move there and become a citizen- not too happy with our government the past (ummmm 8 years ) I would say, I am kind of ashamed what they have done to this country- OMG- but that is a whole other matter!


We'll go to the UK with you.  DH and I would love to travel to the UK.  On Saturdays we watch OLD reruns of Keeping Up Appearances, Last of the Summer Wine and As Time Goes By.  They are all British shows.  Keeping UP Appearances is HILARIOUS!!  Last of the Summer Wine is pretty funny as well as As Time Goes By, which starts Judy Dench.  On BBC America we used to watch the show Coupling.  Yup, I would love to visit the UK.  Course, with our dollar being worth NOTHING it will be some time before we get there.


----------



## maddhatir

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> We'll go to the UK with you.  DH and I would love to travel to the UK.  On Saturdays we watch OLD reruns of Keeping Up Appearances, Last of the Summer Wine and As Time Goes By.  They are all British shows.  Keeping UP Appearances is HILARIOUS!!  Last of the Summer Wine is pretty funny as well as As Time Goes By, which starts Judy Dench.  On BBC America we used to watch the show Coupling.  Yup, I would love to visit the UK.  Course, with our dollar being worth NOTHING it will be some time before we get there.



I have never seen any of the shows you mentioned. I am not one for their humor- If I moved there I may just be staring at them clueless when something is supposed to be funny





But- I DO love _Dame_ Judi Dench- she is incredible! 

I try and see movies now just b/c she is in them!


----------



## Liisa

Ohhhh, I'm all about the accents.  Any kind actually.  

My boss and I actually had to go to the UK back 4 or 5 years ago to set up the accounts in the first place.  It was my second time there... but my boss only flies 1st class.  So when I went with him, I got to go 1st class as well.  It was awesome for an international flight.  We had these pods where you can fully recline and sleep the entire flight - in comfort!!!  What a way to travel.

Stilllllll raining............... blah!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Ohhhh, I'm all about the accents.  Any kind actually.
> 
> My boss and I actually had to go to the UK back 4 or 5 years ago to set up the accounts in the first place.  It was my second time there... but my boss only flies 1st class.  So when I went with him, I got to go 1st class as well.  It was awesome for an international flight.  We had these pods where you can fully recline and sleep the entire flight - in comfort!!!  What a way to travel.
> 
> Stilllllll raining............... blah!



That would be awesome- 1st Class to the UK! 

It is beautiful here in South Jersey! Sun is shining and I would say it is about 60 degrees! My bulbs are coming up all over the yard!

DH wants to get a move on planting the Morning Glories on the 2 arbors. Last year we put up a fence and used the arbor as an entrance- I planted the Morning Glories (and Moonflowers) to soften up the look- he thought they were the best thing in the world 

We now have another arbor and he wants them to grow on that too. He acts like Morning Glories are new to the plant world or something


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

maddhatir said:


> I have never seen any of the shows you mentioned. I am not one for their humor- If I moved there I may just be staring at them clueless when something is supposed to be funny
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> But- I DO love _Dame_ Judi Dench- she is incredible!
> 
> I try and see movies now just b/c she is in them!


 Yea, I'm not into their dry humor either (I HATE Monty Python) but that Keeping Up Appearances is SO FUNNY!!  I mean it, even if you don't like their humor you will split your sides watching that show.  


Liisa said:


> Ohhhh, I'm all about the accents.  Any kind actually.
> 
> My boss and I actually had to go to the UK back 4 or 5 years ago to set up the accounts in the first place.  It was my second time there... but my boss only flies 1st class.  So when I went with him, I got to go 1st class as well.  It was awesome for an international flight.  We had these pods where you can fully recline and sleep the entire flight - in comfort!!!  What a way to travel.
> 
> Stilllllll raining............... blah!


 How AWESOME!!!  



maddhatir said:


> It is beautiful here in South Jersey! Sun is shining and I would say it is about 60 degrees! My bulbs are coming up all over the yard!


 South Jersey???  I'm FROM South Jersey!  Born and raised for 21 years there.  I graduated from Ocean City High School!  It's a small world!!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Glad to hear you slept well.
> 
> 
> 
> Actually I think I said this here before- I would prefer to move there and become a citizen- not too happy with our government the past (ummmm 8 years ) I would say, I am kind of ashamed what they have done to this country- OMG- but that is a whole other matter!



madd, DH and I are right there with ya! Unfortunately as I have learned...the UK has really strict VISA and citizenship laws...they aren't real fond of letting more people take their jobs...so that kind of put our desire on the back burner for now! Although we can't help but still want to live over there... DH and I are HUGE Football(aka soccer to Americans) fans and huge supporters of the Manchester United. We'd love to live near Manchester and be season ticket holders for the matches!!


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> madd, DH and I are right there with ya! Unfortunately as I have learned...the UK has really strict VISA and citizenship laws...they aren't real fond of letting more people take their jobs...so that kind of put our desire on the back burner for now! Although we can't help but still want to live over there... DH and I are HUGE Football(aka soccer to Americans) fans and huge supporters of the Manchester United. We'd love to live near Manchester and be season ticket holders for the matches!!



Hmmm- how ironic- they do not like giving their jobs away and the US tosses theirs away to anyone willy nilly! 

Now you mentioned football- How in the world can I watch Hockey??! EEEEK! 

I guess I can get some kind of dish or something


----------



## ReaderGirl

Hi FortheLoveofDisney!  I think we're in the same boat.   
We couldn't have children, and being sad about it isn't helpful for me.  
This is my path in life, so I'm going to enjoy it and do things I find meaningful, like helping animals. 

I'm not into the British comedies, but I got completely hooked on the mystery series Rosemary & Thyme, about the Brit gardners who traipse from gorgeous setting to gorgeous setting, happening upon murders and of course, solving them, usually with some sort of horticultural twist.  Very fun.  

Everyone have a good weekend!
ReaderGirl


----------



## maddhatir

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> South Jersey???  I'm FROM South Jersey!  Born and raised for 21 years there.  I graduated from Ocean City High School!  It's a small world!!



Yup! Marlton. 

I think I may have mentioned it to you when I came over to the other CF thread? 

We used to be in OC all the time b/c our BF used to have a condo right over the 9th Street bridge! As you were going into OC it was right on the left!

And my cousin owned a home on 32nd and Central. Right behind Campbells Kitchen. Actually he bought his house from the woman who owned the place.  He sold it a few years ago when the market was doing really well. We used to be there all the time too.

I love OC- it is my favorite "shore"


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

maddhatir said:


> Yup! Marlton.
> 
> I think I may have mentioned it to you when I came over to the other CF thread?
> 
> We used to be in OC all the time b/c our BF used to have a condo right over the 9th Street bridge! As you were going into OC it was right on the left!
> 
> And my cousin owned a home on 32nd and Central. Right behind Campbells Kitchen. Actually he bought his house from the woman who owned the place.  He sold it a few years ago when the market was doing really well. We used to be there all the time too.
> 
> I love OC- it is my favorite "shore"


 You know, now that you mention it. . . .  you did tell me that.  I am having BRAIN  FREEZE!!! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 Or as the faculty around her call it, "I'm having a brain CRAMP".


----------



## maddhatir

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> You know, now that you mention it. . . .  you did tell me that.  I am having BRAIN  FREEZE!!!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Or as the faculty around her call it, "I'm having a brain CRAMP".



DON'T feel bad- I cannot keep the info and the people straight! 

I am the worst at that!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

ReaderGirl said:


> Hi FortheLoveofDisney!  I think we're in the same boat.
> We couldn't have children, and being sad about it isn't helpful for me.
> This is my path in life, so I'm going to enjoy it and do things I find meaningful, like helping animals.
> 
> I'm not into the British comedies, but I got completely hooked on the mystery series Rosemary & Thyme, about the Brit gardners who traipse from gorgeous setting to gorgeous setting, happening upon murders and of course, solving them, usually with some sort of horticultural twist.  Very fun.
> 
> Everyone have a good weekend!
> ReaderGirl


  I think we are.   I stopped back over on the other thread just to see what it was about.  They seem like a nice bunch of folks but it is as I feared, they're still stuck on the baby-go-round.  Talking IVFs and adoptions and "keep trying.  We were together x amount of years before we had ours".  I'm not there anymore and I don't want to be there again.  That is not the focus of my life.  I want to talk about travel and food and good wine, great music and explore different cultures.  I really want to find other like minded people and gravitate towards them.  I hope that doesn't make me sound like a calloused person.  In the back of my mind I'm thinking of bad past experiences I've had and I guess that's where I'm coming from.


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Suzi I love your new siggy- that freakin' kitty is freakin' hilarious!
> 
> And I notice you are never in the same place twice! (your location under your screen name!)


I move around alot under the witness protection program   



Liisa said:


> Feeling a bit better - finally got a good nights sleep last night. What a difference that makes.
> Suzi, how's your hubby doing? I can't believe you are still getting snow! YUCK!!! Of course, I'd take that over the dreary, gray rainy days we've been having. Depressing....


Glad you're feeling better Liisa! You're so right, the gray days are just such a downer. Hopefully we will see some sun this weekend so I can BBQ!!! Hubby's doing pretty good today. His friends have been visiting on a regular basis, which I'm glad of. That way he's not just stuck talking to me and the dogs!



maddhatir said:


> Suzi- just on the Dimmu website and I read this:
> 
> _The 24-show trek will launch on April 2nd in Toronto, Ontario, Canada and will end on May 4th in Chicago, IL. _
> _*Drummer Tony Laureano will continue to handle drum duties, as the 2007 injury suffered by Hellhammer still has him sidelined*_
> 
> I wonder if I will get to see Hellhammer in action??
> 
> Ya know, I have to stare at your siggy everytime I see one of your posts- there is nothing sexier than a dude, hair flying and banging his head.....or banging on the drums!-
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> OK- Nothing sexier- EXCEPT for JD! Now If JD would just do a little headbanging I would be speachless. That, or, I need to see a pic of him ridng a Harley with no helmet and hair blowin' in the wind! It would be the death of me for sure!
> 
> 
> .


I knew Hellhammer had been injured but thought he might be ready to resume his drumming duties...poor dear man. I'd offer to nurse him back to health but I'm a bit tied up at the moment. The drummer in my pic is my beloved Joey. Sexy little devil. Can't wait to see him this summer! He's even gorgeous without the mask....


----------



## Barthy73

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> I want to talk about travel and food and good wine, great music and explore different cultures.  I really want to find other like minded people and gravitate towards them.




I couldn't have said it better myself!  Everyone else my age (35) has kidlets running around, and they never have the time nor money to do anything other than their family stuff.  No Thanks!

My wife and I went to Dreams in Cancun over Thanksgiving last year.  While it was a nice resort, the holiday season is the WRONG time to go, as kids were everywhere and obnoxious as ever.  At least at Disney, we go during times that kids are in school, and it's Disney, so kids are going to be there.

All Inclusive ADULTS ONLY resorts for us in the future when we stray from WDW.

So, our friends are either young and don't have a lot to share, or they're old with grown kids, and now they're looking forward to grandkids.  We can't win.  Back to what ForTheLuvofDisney said:



ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> I really want to find other like minded people and gravitate towards them.



AMEN!!


----------



## eternitybc

FayeW said:


> Ann Landers always said that when someone askes a nosy, personal question you should just smile quizzically and say "Why do you ask?", or, if you particularily want to get your point across you could amend it to "That is a very personal question, why do you ask?"



FayeW- great response. So now, what do I tell ym future Mother In Law?? I'm only 25, but been with her son for 8 years. Somehow she always manages to work kids in. I said I was thinking of changing careers, to become a realtor- first thing out of her mouthis "Thats a good career- it's very flexible when you have kids!" Seriously put me off real estate 

Problem is my bf (we own a place together) says it's normal, and I shouldn't let it bother me. She just wants grand kids. Maybe right, but it DOES bother me...I don't want kids rigth now,a dn more pressure I get the less I want them!!  I'm with above posters, I do NOT want children. Unfortunately DH does.. we talked about havign them when I'm 30, so I have 5 years to have fun before we get serious  I'm hopign the motherly urge will ahve hit me by then. id o kind of like the idea of being a mom, but....I'd rather travel and have fun. 

I don't want to stay at hoe and take care of babies for years  I told him i'm hiring a nanny when we have kids...he doesn't like the idea... but if we can afford it I will!


----------



## Hixski

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> I think we are.   I stopped back over on the other thread just to see what it was about.  They seem like a nice bunch of folks but it is as I feared, they're still stuck on the baby-go-round.  Talking IVFs and adoptions and "keep trying.  We were together x amount of years before we had ours".  I'm not there anymore and I don't want to be there again.  That is not the focus of my life.  I want to talk about travel and food and good wine, great music and explore different cultures.  I really want to find other like minded people and gravitate towards them.  I hope that doesn't make me sound like a calloused person.  In the back of my mind I'm thinking of bad past experiences I've had and I guess that's where I'm coming from.



I have read some of that other thread too. Some of them sound like they have used every bit of money they have and still trying to figure out how to keep going. At some point you have to decide that it may not happen and move on. I'm sure that is hard when you get into a mindset and can't get out of it but it will make you crazy. 

I remember one or maybe two women were talking that their DH just wants to stop but they won't let it go. They should realize they could end up without a DH either if they can't move on.

We tried at one point but I guess it was just not meant to be. We didn't even get tested to find out what (if anything) was wrong. We just said "Oh, well" I guess we just never wanted kids too bad anyway.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hixski said:


> I have read some of that other thread too. Some of them sound like they have used every bit of money they have and still trying to figure out how to keep going. At some point you have to decide that it may not happen and move on. *I'm sure that is hard when you get into a mindset and can't get out of it but it will make you crazy.*
> 
> I remember one or maybe two women were talking that their DH just wants to stop but they won't let it go. They should realize they could end up without a DH either if they can't move on.
> 
> We tried at one point but I guess it was just not meant to be. We didn't even get tested to find out what (if anything) was wrong. We just said "Oh, well" I guess we just never wanted kids too bad anyway.


  I was there, in that mindset.  We did have some testing done and I had two surgeries for endometriosis (I had the surgery for pain relief FIRST and foremost, secondly hoping I would have gotten pregnant). We even jumped in and right back out of the adoption waters. We never did drugs or any procedures.

I *think* my "mindset" was fueled by the people I was surrounded by.  ALL of our friends had children and were ever having more.  My DH is from a big family and my mother in law was always touting the virtues of her life in motherhood.  It was her identity and she loved it.  Everytime a new baby was on it's way in the family, said mother became elevated.  It was presented to us (OK, forced on us) that having children is the natural NORMAL next step.  When we would go out to dinner with friends or family, their children would, _naturally_. come along.  When we would visit, we were surrounded by their children.  All of the conversations seemed to be kid geared and even if they didn't start out that way (after 50 interuptions by the kids) it ended up that way.  Yes, we found it VERY annoying but we were reminded that someday we would have our own   . . . . as it's the natural next step.  I had one friend in particular (I no longer associate with her) who was baby obsessed!!  She had had I don't know how many miscarriages but just kept plugging away at it.  She had two (a 10 year old and a 3 year old) when I moved away in '06.  Now I understand she's pregnant w/ #3.   Anyway, she was my closest friend and I allowed that craziness to spill over into my life.  I honestly can't explain it now but at the time I was obsessed right along with her.  It's like we fueled eachother's fires.  This might sound crazy but it's like when a Pitbull becomes so focused on something that you have to break the spell or something is going to be destroyed.  It was kind of like that.  

After my last surgery I went on BCP (that was back in '06).  I've been on them ever since.  We also moved in '06.  And like the Altoid's commercial says it best, "It was a slap to the cerebellum" my focus was broken and life starting looking like . . . well . . . .  life again.

DH's grade school friend lives near us and he's a bachelor w/ no kids.  For the first time we were able to experience life w/ friends w/OUT kids! It was AMAZING!!  Course, now said friend is getting serious w/ a girl (which is fine) and has no time for us.   He's starting to talk kids.  I'm like, "Great, here we go again."   I also met another friend who is 23 and her DH is 30.  They have no children _BUT_ I'm sure they will one day.  I think she'd be ok w/out them but her DH wants them.  There were whisperings that they would try this summer.  

Don't get me wrong, I don't NOT like kids but it really has been terrific being around kidless people.  It reminds me that there is LIFE out there and I missed out on it for so long.  Oh the things I could have done. . . going back to school being #1!! if I hadn't been of the "mindset".

I'm sorry for the babbeling.  Sometimes it just feels REALLY good to let it out.


----------



## maddhatir

Well, DH and I just finished watching the whole George Carlin special! It was awesome!

Let me tell ya, those people who have a problem with the word "breeders" they sure are _not _gonna be too happy about how George explains what he thinks about people having kids...... "all it is, is plopping out units"


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Well, DH and I just finished watching the whole George Carlin special! It was awesome!
> 
> Let me tell ya, those people who have a problem with the word "breeders" they sure are _not _gonna be too happy about how George explains what he thinks about people having kids...... "all it is, is plopping out units"



I think that sounds much better than breeders don't you!!!??? George has been funny since I watched him back in the 70's. It doesn't matter the era he has always been spot on.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Hixski said:


> I think that sounds much better than breeders don't you!!!??? George has been funny since I watched him back in the 70's. It doesn't matter the era he has always been spot on.





I watch the Movie DOGMA for his humour...Funny.


----------



## ReaderGirl

Hi to everyone!

FortheLoveofDisney, I can relate to much of your post.  Some families are their own little culture of childbearing.  It can be hard to keep one's own perspective and priorities.  I know that our not having children is a big disappointment to my in-laws, and it's hard not to feel like second class citizens when everyone else is trotting out the grandchildren.  

If people need to talk a lot about their sadness at not having children, that's okay, but it's not for me.  I think it's easy to get mired in a "lack" mindset, instead of seeing what's available only to those who don't have kids.  This is the only life I've got, and I'm going to move on!   

Here's a little present for everyone....      several well-done studies show that being married can raise your level of happiness (doesn't always, as many know!), having a comfortable income can raise your level of happiness (to a degree), but studies show that having children does *not* make people any happier.  

Have a good weekend!!   
ReaderGirl


----------



## Suzibrat

Good Morning Everybody!
I'm late this morning because I had to run to the store to get the ingrdients for a Triple Chocolate Kahluha Cake that I am making to take with us when we have dinner at a friend's house tonight. 
It's nice and sunny today so hopefully all the snow we had yesterday will melt away. I have a bunch of laundry to do and housework stuff so I'd better step away from the computer, huh?
have a good day!!!


----------



## maddhatir

ReaderGirl said:


> Here's a little present for everyone....      several well-done studies show that being married can raise your level of happiness (doesn't always, as many know!), having a comfortable income can raise your level of happiness (to a degree), but studies show that having children does *not* make people any happier.
> 
> Have a good weekend!!
> ReaderGirl




Yes- and they say WE are the ones who are miserable! 

A lot of parents I see just look......spent......frazzled......etc......


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Good Morning Everybody!
> I'm late this morning because I had to run to the store to get the ingrdients for a Triple Chocolate Kahluha Cake that I am making to take with us when we have dinner at a friend's house tonight.
> It's nice and sunny today so hopefully all the snow we had yesterday will melt away. I have a bunch of laundry to do and housework stuff so I'd better step away from the computer, huh?
> have a good day!!!



MMMMM- sounds good! I have doing so good with not eating junk! Anytime someone asks me what my diet consists of (b/c I am a veggie) DH says......desserts 

I DID step away for the computer yesterday after work and tackled the bathroom floor. I have been wanting to scrub it with bleach in soapy water for a long time- the grout started looking dingy- I have a stinking cleaning woman and she sucks! 

So- I was on my hands and knees yesterday scrubbing the floor, took down the shower curtain to wash, removed the radiator cover and vacuumed all that--- 

I have to step away again today and maybe clean some windows and whatever else might be in my way!
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




WHY?! am singing The Stones song- "Mother's Little Helper"


----------



## WDWguru

eternitybc said:


> I'm with above posters, I do NOT want children. Unfortunately DH does.. we talked about havign them when I'm 30, so I have 5 years to have fun before we get serious  I'm hopign the motherly urge will ahve hit me by then. id o kind of like the idea of being a mom, but....I'd rather travel and have fun.
> 
> I don't want to stay at hoe and take care of babies for years  I told him i'm hiring a nanny when we have kids...he doesn't like the idea... but if we can afford it I will!



Hate to be the downer here, but this is a VERY serious issue in your marriage and, imho, nothing to be compromised on. As Dr. Phil says, when it comes to kids there is no compromise - you must have two "yes"s or it doesn't work.

You need to have some serious discussions and figure out whether he really does want them and whether you really don't. If that's the conclusion the best option is to get out now. If you end up having kids, there's a good chance you will resent them and him, and that's not a good environment to raise kids in - or for the marriage. If you end up not having kids, there's a good chance he will resent you for it, especially with his family fanning the flames. 

I hate to say it but if you really honestly can't agree on this do NOT compromise. It's not fair to either of you.


----------



## PhotobearSam

WDWguru said:


> Hate to be the downer here, but this is a VERY serious issue in your marriage and, imho, nothing to be compromised on. As Dr. Phil says, when it comes to kids there is no compromise - you must have two "yes"s or it doesn't work.
> 
> You need to have some serious discussions and figure out whether he really does want them and whether you really don't. If that's the conclusion the best option is to get out now. If you end up having kids, there's a good chance you will resent them and him, and that's not a good environment to raise kids in - or for the marriage. If you end up not having kids, there's a good chance he will resent you for it, especially with his family fanning the flames.
> 
> I hate to say it but if you really honestly can't agree on this do NOT compromise. It's not fair to either of you.




Amen,

Having children is an all or nothing type of situation...You can't do it half way.

I say DON'T have kids unless you have burning desire for them. It would be horrible to grow up  in a house where one would "feel" they were not wanted. It happened to a friend of mine and it was not pretty.

I could never "hope to want them"...I think you either do or you don't...This is dangerous in a marriage. Be careful.


----------



## Barthy73

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WC02eZeBhw

I think those of us who choose to be childfree can appreciate this one a bit more!!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Barthy73 said:


> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WC02eZeBhw
> 
> I think those of us who choose to be childfree can appreciate this one a bit more!!


 That is hilarious!!!

I was watching and DH walked around the corner with this horrified look on his face and asked, "What is that???"  Cause all he could hear was the kid screaming.  Once he saw it he was  !


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WC02eZeBhw
> 
> I think those of us who choose to be childfree can appreciate this one a bit more!!



Love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Barthy73 said:


> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WC02eZeBhw
> 
> I think those of us who choose to be childfree can appreciate this one a bit more!!



I'm crying I'm laughing so hard!!!


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> Love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




I have emailed it to 6 couples who don't have kids...PRICELESS


----------



## Hixski

PhotobearSam said:


> I have emailed it to 6 couples who don't have kids...PRICELESS




I read that and thought you said you emailed it to 6 couples *WHO HAVE KIDS*!!!! I was thinking you are soooo bad!!! Then I read it again. 

DH and I try to live our lives by that wonderful line in the the Aerosmith song.
"Life is a journey, not a destination". I'm sure someone more profound wrote that first but it escapes me at this time.

What good is life if you don't live it.


----------



## Suzibrat

Ohhh my head...what did I do last night????  Over and out.......have a good day everyone


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Suzibrat said:


> Ohhh my head...what did I do last night????  Over and out.......have a good day everyone


Oh Suzibrat I have sooooo been there!   I found a great site to help aid in the symptoms (I even saved it in my favorites  ) It's called So You Wanna Cure a Hangover?  Thankfully, I've not had to use it in SOME time!  But maybe it can help you.

I'm up and ready to head to mass.  I need to go to the grocery store but I REALLY don't feel like it.  Boy, do the weekends go this fast for anyone else?

By the way, I'm sure you guys have mentioned it before (maybe when I wasn't posting so much  ) but what does everyone do for a living?  Do you like it or is it something that just pays the bills?  Are you doing what you set out to do?

I am an admin. assistant and DH works in landscaping.  It's not what I planned to do with my life but it isn't horrible and it does pay the bills.  I've worked at worse places.

I think I'd really like to get into psychology but NOT as a counselor or therapist.  I think I'd like to teach it or teach seminars for companies or something.  Course, that does require me to go back to school which I REALLY need to do.

Anyway, have a great day.  I'll stop back by later if I can.


----------



## Barthy73

My wife and I bought a new home last Fall (September).  We weren't really looking, but we wanted a basement, and the house we found was perfect and had a HUGE basement.

We finished the basement over the winter and now have our own Sports Bar.  There's no way any of this would be possible with kidlets and their gigantic expense!

Last night, we had a couple of friends over and drank beer, had a few drinks, and played pool until 2:30am.  It's just before 11am, and I just got up!!

No way any of this would be possible with kids.  These are the types of things I'm going to start telling people who think I'm missing something by not having a family.

Here are a few pics of my basement:  http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=27421&l=11012&id=545026282


Enjoy!


----------



## maddhatir

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> By the way, I'm sure you guys have mentioned it before (maybe when I wasn't posting so much  ) but what does everyone do for a living?  Do you like it or is it something that just pays the bills?  Are you doing what you set out to do?



I work for an MRI facility--- been with the same boss for 12 years now- This is his 3rd venture I have been through with him. I just keep tagging along when he comes up with new ideas 

I am just in the billing and collection department. We have gotten so big that my job has been narrowed down from billing, collections AND pmt posting to just pmt posting. We had to hire a lot more people to handle the responsibilities b/c we just opened a 2nd facility. I got to choose what I wanted to get rid of. I HATE the collection part of the job. I wanted to give up being on the phone all the time dealing with insurance companies b/c that is THE worse!- I like sitting, alone, listening to Howard Stern and my music all day long and no one bothers me.  As long my $$ balances out with the bookkeepers $$ every month- I am good to go. 

This is certainly NOT my idea of the perfect job. But, I am not complaining. My supervisor is SO cool. I get 3 weeks vacation, 8 sick/personal days and about 10 holidays off. AND I work from home.  Can't wait for the warm weather so that I can move my "office" to the back porch! 



Barthy73 said:


> Here are a few pics of my basement:  http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=27421&l=11012&id=545026282
> 
> Enjoy!



Nice! You did a great job on the basement. 

Part of my basement is my office- We were lucky when we bought this house a few years ago that it had a full finished basement and the husband had built an office for himself. So I moved my stuff right in. 

I would like to put a bar downstairs- I think this yard sale season I will see what treasures I can find to start the job.

Yes- I am a yard sale freak! The stuff I find is incredible! I love buying old furniture and painting/distressing it for my house and now that we moved our porch from the side of the house to the back and made it larger (18x20) I want to add more furniture out there too! Next to the screened in porch we want to add a patio for DHs grill. 

DH and I are not the most ambitious people in the world- so things take us a little longer than usual We move at our own pace.


----------



## HockeyKat

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Oh Suzibrat I have sooooo been there!   I found a great site to help aid in the symptoms (I even saved it in my favorites  ) It's called So You Wanna Cure a Hangover?  Thankfully, I've not had to use it in SOME time!  But maybe it can help you.
> 
> I'm up and ready to head to mass.  I need to go to the grocery store but I REALLY don't feel like it.  Boy, do the weekends go this fast for anyone else?
> 
> By the way, I'm sure you guys have mentioned it before (maybe when I wasn't posting so much  ) but what does everyone do for a living?  Do you like it or is it something that just pays the bills?  Are you doing what you set out to do?
> 
> I work at a university (bet you can't guess which one  ) as an admin. assistant and DH works in landscaping at the same university.  It's not what I planned to do with my life but it isn't horrible and it does pay the bills.  I've worked at worse places.
> 
> I think I'd really like to get into psychology but NOT as a counselor or therapist.  I think I'd like to teach it or teach seminars for companies or something.  Course, that does require me to go back to school which I REALLY need to do.
> 
> Anyway, have a great day.  I'll stop back by later if I can.



I have been off and on this thread but mostly lurking... hope it's okay if I chime in.  Mr Kat and I are definitely child-free, and both of us have absolutely no desire to have them, ever.   I have never wanted children, and now that I am 32 and the "urge" hasn't surfaced, I am feeling that it never will.   I can appreciate and respect others' feelings on the matter, but, just not for me.

I am reading your hangover article with MUCH interest.   I wish I had seen it last week, as my Wed AM was far from a good one.   

I am a software engineer for a bank.  I write and support remote deposit/check processing software for both small businesses and 300 of our 1400 bank branches.   It is a stressful and somewhat demanding job, but you do get good benefits (40 sick days a year, 3 weeks vacation, 10 holidays, health insurance is free), and I really like my boss and my team.  

Has anyone tried their local chapter of No Kidding?  I am on mine's mailing list but haven't had the courage to actually go to any of their events...


----------



## zima-cheryl

HockeyKat said:


> Has anyone tried their local chapter of No Kidding?  I am on mine's mailing list but haven't had the courage to actually go to any of their events...



We are semi-active members of the local chapter.
Most the activities are food based - which is fine by me.  I'm always up for going out to new and different restaurants.  Basically we get together, eat & drink a lot, and shoot the breeze about whatever... movies, pets, gardening, work, politics (you know; adult topics!).  

Unfortunately during hockey season (we hold season tix to a local AHL team) we miss more meetings than we like; but we make it to most the summer ones.  

I'd say try it - what's the worst that can happen?  You meet a bunch of new people and have nothing to talk about for an hour or two.  Best case you meet some new folks & make a few new friends!


----------



## zima-cheryl

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> By the way, I'm sure you guys have mentioned it before (maybe when I wasn't posting so much  ) but what does everyone do for a living?  Do you like it or is it something that just pays the bills?  Are you doing what you set out to do?



I do software quality assurance - my 2 college degrees are in Broadcasting & English Lit.  Far from what I studied, but I do like the work. 
What I don't like are the corporate politics and cheap bean counters who run everything!   

Fortunatly we do have a generous paid time off bank and I like the PTO instead of vaca & sick time.  I end up w/about 2 sick days & 25 days off each year (another plus for being kid free...I know some folks who get about 5 days off & burn the rest on sick kids & days that school is closed).

And my boss is pretty flexible on the telecommuting & letting me flex my hours as I need to.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Barthy73 said:


> My wife and I bought a new home last Fall (September).  We weren't really looking, but we wanted a basement, and the house we found was perfect and had a HUGE basement.
> 
> We finished the basement over the winter and now have our own Sports Bar.  There's no way any of this would be possible with kidlets and their gigantic expense!
> 
> Last night, we had a couple of friends over and drank beer, had a few drinks, and played pool until 2:30am.  It's just before 11am, and I just got up!!
> 
> No way any of this would be possible with kids.  These are the types of things I'm going to start telling people who think I'm missing something by not having a family.
> 
> Here are a few pics of my basement:  http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=27421&l=11012&id=545026282
> 
> 
> Enjoy!


 Barthy your basement looks AMAZING!!  Great job! Doncha' just love sleeping in?  It's one of life's little pleasures!



HockeyKat said:


> I am a software engineer for a bank.  I write and support remote deposit/check processing software for both small businesses and 300 of our 1400 bank branches.   It is a stressful and somewhat demanding job, but you do get good benefits (40 sick days a year, 3 weeks vacation, 10 holidays, health insurance is free), and I really like my boss and my team.
> 
> Has anyone tried their local chapter of No Kidding?  I am on mine's mailing list but haven't had the courage to actually go to any of their events...


 Did I read that right?  40 sick days a YEAR???  How awesome!!  I've looked for a local chapter of No Kidding but we don't have any in the area.  I suppose I could start one but I'm new to the area and we don't know that many people.  I'd love to belong to one though.



zima-cheryl said:


> I do software quality assurance - my 2 college degrees are in Broadcasting & English Lit.  Far from what I studied, but I do like the work.
> What I don't like are the corporate politics and cheap bean counters who run everything!
> 
> Fortunatly we do have a generous paid time off bank and I like the PTO instead of vaca & sick time.  I end up w/about 2 sick days & 25 days off each year (another plus for being kid free...I know some folks who get about 5 days off & burn the rest on sick kids & days that school is closed).
> 
> And my boss is pretty flexible on the telecommuting & letting me flex my hours as I need to.


 I think I'd really like the PTO as opposed to sick/vacation time.

Working for the state I get 15 vacation days a year and 15 sick days a year.  I also get 13 state holidays but because I work for the university our days are different than the state's.  Like, we won't get off Memorial Day or Labor Day or Columbus Day but we'll get a week off at Christmas and an optional holiday that we get to pick.  I chose October 24th!  for two fold reason.  The main reason I chose October 24th is because it is Take Back Your Time Day!!  Take Back Your Time is a grass roots effor that is challenging time poverty.  Here's a little excerpt from their website:





> TAKE BACK YOUR TIME is a major U.S./Canadian initiative to challenge the epidemic of overwork, over-scheduling and time famine that now threatens our health, our families and relationships, our communities and our environment.
> 
> 
> October 24th Is Take Back Your Time Day


The other reason is because it's the day before my birthday.

The thing that I hate the most is when people act like I'm personally stealing _*their*_ time or like my being absent or taking a vacation is going to bring the office/company crashing down.


----------



## Step

Barthy73 said:


> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WC02eZeBhw
> 
> I think those of us who choose to be childfree can appreciate this one a bit more!!



LOL


----------



## HockeyKat

zima-cheryl said:


> We are semi-active members of the local chapter.
> Most the activities are food based - which is fine by me.  I'm always up for going out to new and different restaurants.  Basically we get together, eat & drink a lot, and shoot the breeze about whatever... movies, pets, gardening, work, politics (you know; adult topics!).
> 
> Unfortunately during hockey season (we hold season tix to a local AHL team) we miss more meetings than we like; but we make it to most the summer ones.
> 
> I'd say try it - what's the worst that can happen?  You meet a bunch of new people and have nothing to talk about for an hour or two.  Best case you meet some new folks & make a few new friends!



Yeah, the food-based thing is part of the problem.   I have been trying pretty hard to lose weight over the past year, and life throws enough curveballs at me as it is... maybe once I get to goal weight and can add in a few more off days than the 1-2 a month I get now.

We are big hockey fans too, but are lucky enough to have an NHL team in our backyard.    



ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> Did I read that right?  40 sick days a YEAR???  How awesome!!  I've looked for a local chapter of No Kidding but we don't have any in the area.  I suppose I could start one but I'm new to the area and we don't know that many people.  I'd love to belong to one though.



Yup, that is 40 sick days a year.   I think that they basically just don't want to deal with the paperwork of short-term disability!  You have to have valid reasons/approval and there are restrictions, but for example, you can take 20 days to care for a sick relative.  It would also count for surgery, that kind of thing.   I think if you actually took every one of them for common illnesses (cold, etc.), they might take issue with it.


----------



## PhotobearSam

There are no "No-Kidding" chapters out here...We are thinking of starting one.

I have NEVER wanted children and I knew from an early age I did not want any. DH was not sure when we met but after his brothers had kids, he was convinced that it was not for him. We are VERY good as an aunt and uncle though. 

We own a motel (24 rooms and 7 suites) and chalets (16 two bedroom cottages) business on the east coast of Canada and we are closed during the winter. We just bought a lot of land across the street to build some more.

In summer, I work 12-15 hrs a day, 7 days a week for June, July, Aug and most of September. (I am the only one who works the desk) We are also open in May and October but by advance reservation only.

We get to travel in the winter. We usually leave for about 30 days in all. We also take a few long weekends and a 1 week trip a year to Ottawa to visit DH's family and our friends...It's a tough life in the summer but easier in the winter. Thank God we don't have kids because I could not work as much as I do.

DH is an assistant manager of a Movie Gallery Video store in the winter and he does both the video store and our business in the summer. He gets whatever time off he wants because they love him at his store and they know he does not NEED the job but does it for something to do.

My parents always had businesses when I was growing up but I trained as a photographer and used to take wedding photos. DH studied television broadcasting. We are in such a different occupation then we thought but it's good for us.

I love hearing what you all do. It makes people aware that childfree people are like everyone else.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Good morning everyone!  

Is everyone ready to get through this Monday?  I like my job ok but Monday mornings are the worst (isn't that so cliche'?  ).


----------



## Barthy73

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> I like my job ok but Monday mornings are the worst.



Monday's suck, especially the beginning of the month.  Yes I know, the month doesn't start until tomorrow, but darned financial periods mean today is the beginning of the month.

I work as a Demand Planning Manager for a manufacturing company.  Sounds boring, and it is.  I don't love my job, but I like it enough.  If you ever visit the crafts department at Wal-Mart, you'll see a lot of my products, as we manufacture about half of the yarn and most of the thread you'll see there.  My job is to try and figure out how much Wal-Mart and our other customers are going to buy, so I can tell our manufacturing team how much to make.  Yes, I'm a computer nerd, but at least I won't produce any offspring who are nerds as well!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Barthy73 said:


> Monday's suck, especially the beginning of the month.


 Morning Barthy  Did you have a good day yesterday?  I saw how you didn't get up till almost 11.  I took a nap yesterday and then I couldn't get to sleep last night.  Of course, when the alarm clock goes off I'm REALLY ready to sleep then.  Oh to be independently wealthy!


----------



## Barthy73

Hey Love *laugh*

Just sent you a PM.  I loved sleeping in yesterday.  I really wanted a nap around 4 yesterday, but I know I wouldn't sleep last night if I did, so I forced myself to stay up and went to bed about 9:30.  Alarm sucked this morning, but I have to work to pay for my toys!


----------



## PoohNTuck

Like Sam I used to play "business" when I was growing up.  Now I care for babies in a neonatal intensive care unit as a nurse.  Ha ha, the irony!

Just checking in to say hello to everyone... still no Disney trip on the horizon though we've been visiting around New England lately and are cruising to Panama in the fall.  I wish there were more money and more time off for more trips. I don't know how people with kids do anything-- wait, no, I do, they go into debt!  All of our coworkers are in serious debt and just add to it when they want something or need something.  I am SO grateful we can afford what we do... I just wish we could afford more sometimes!

Happy Spring All!


----------



## Suzibrat

Good Morning Everyone,
I need to catch up what you all are up too. I'm stuck on the pics of Barthy's basement, wondering if I could live there  
It's nice and sunny here today. I need it to get thru all the rain that's on it's way. I need a vaca sooo bad!
We had another flock of turkeys in the yard this morning, which means they left "turkey sculptures" everywhere. Ahhh life in the middle of nowhere.....
Have a great day everyone


----------



## Barthy73

*laugh*

Come on over, Suzi.  We've got 5BR, 3BA, and it's just the two of us and the dog!  It's pretty sad that my dog doesn't even get her own room.  We've only got one guest room at the moment, but we'll be adding another in the future.  Some people think we're crazy for having as much space as we do, but we love to entertain, and it's really none of their business.  

So I've got my own personal sports bar..  what's the big deal?  I can't help it if they can't host parties for 30+ people without breaking a sweat.  

Wait until people see my media room/home theater when it's finished.  *laugh*


----------



## Hixski

I work as an IT Supervisor. IT is Information Technology in laymans terms. I basically run the Data Center. The company I work for has been hanging a layoff over our heads for the last 3 years. They have had 2 layoffs and I am still there. Right now I am supervising myself. Lately I have been getting calls almost weekly from headhunters with contract positions. Unless something permanent comes along that is better than what I have now I am staying. I am NOT going to give up a severance package should I get laid off.

I have worked in IT since I have been in school. I was doing that till I decided what I wanted to do when I grew up. Since I am still doing IT work I guess I either haven't grown up or not decided what I want to do.


----------



## Suzibrat

Barthy73 said:


> *laugh*
> 
> Come on over, Suzi. We've got 5BR, 3BA, and it's just the two of us and the dog! It's pretty sad that my dog doesn't even get her own room. We've only got one guest room at the moment, but we'll be adding another in the future. Some people think we're crazy for having as much space as we do, but we love to entertain, and *it's really none of their business*.
> 
> So I've got my own personal sports bar.. what's the big deal? I can't help it if they can't host parties for 30+ people without breaking a sweat.
> 
> Wait until people see my media room/home theater when it's finished. *laugh*


I think it's totally cool that you have your own sports bar! At least you'll never get caught for driving under the influence! People that think you're crazy? Nah, probably green with envy! However, I do think that poor dog of yours needs her own room. Canopy bed, big screen TV to watch Animal Planet, maybe a doggie hot tub for those long stressful days (actually these are the things MY dog would want!)


----------



## Shyvioletisme

Well, I work part time as a freelance editor(currently my only project is editing a fantasy sports website...), I have a degree in English Literature and would love to have a full time job as an editor, but haven't had much luck since we moved a  year ago..though I do enjoy getting to work from home for now...i'd just like a job that gets me more money..since mine is just part time, it isn't much income. 
DH works as an account rep at a computer tech dispatching service. He likes his job alright. Nothing amazing...but it pays the bills.


----------



## HockeyKat

Barthy73 said:


> Monday's suck, especially the beginning of the month.  Yes I know, the month doesn't start until tomorrow, but darned financial periods mean today is the beginning of the month.
> 
> I work as a Demand Planning Manager for a manufacturing company.  Sounds boring, and it is.  I don't love my job, but I like it enough.  If you ever visit the crafts department at Wal-Mart, you'll see a lot of my products, as we manufacture about half of the yarn and most of the thread you'll see there.  My job is to try and figure out how much Wal-Mart and our other customers are going to buy, so I can tell our manufacturing team how much to make.  Yes, I'm a computer nerd, but at least I won't produce any offspring who are nerds as well!



Yeah, Mondays definitely suck.  Esp rainy, gloomy, cold Mondays when your boss and team lead are on vacation, when you know that you could be in your bed and no-one would be the wiser... 

You know, populating the world with computer nerds (and little female hockey players) would be a reason TO have children... of course, if there weren't that problem of carrying, bearing, and raising them that I don't want in my life...


----------



## Barthy73

Hey Kat,

I saw some older posts of yours talking about having a kidless house with 2 guest rooms and a dining room table set.  This was part of my inspiration to post pictures of my basement to show off another kidless space.  If you haven't seen them, you'll like them.  :-D


----------



## Liisa

Looks like I missed alot this weekend!  DH and I were catching up with family since we missed all the Easter dinners last week (since I was sick).  

We also did alot of test drives on cars this weekend.  DH can't decide what he wants next.  He has about 2 months to decide.  The woman that housesits and watches our dogs while we are away has an old Geo Prism with 200k+ miles on it (no idea how the car lasted that long)... and it is dying a slow, painful death.  So, to help her out, we are selling her our car and DH gets a new one.   Dilemmas, dilemmas!  

As for work, DH is a Senior Tax Manager for one of the big four firms.  He'd prefer not to work at all, but loves what he does.  I'm the CFO/COO of a company that makes skincare (primarily anti-wrinkle) products.  I've been here for 7 years and became a part owner just over a year ago - right after we sold our previous line of products to a public company in California.  The stress level is through the roof, but I love building the company and overseeing just about everything.  The president and primary owner can be a pain in the butt, he's a typical entrepreneur.  But the upside here is well worth it.  There is no way DH and I could have these careers with kids, unless we wanted someone else to raise them for us.  

6 weeks until our Mexio trip (adults only all-inclusive here we come!!!)


----------



## HockeyKat

Barthy73 said:


> Hey Kat,
> 
> I saw some older posts of yours talking about having a kidless house with 2 guest rooms and a dining room table set.  This was part of my inspiration to post pictures of my basement to show off another kidless space.  If you haven't seen them, you'll like them.  :-D



I'll check them out tonight.  Big Brother over here blocks any of the facebook/myspace/etc type sites.

Yeah, we have the guest room, the "study" (fouton, bookshelves, desk, but no-one uses them), the bonus room w/ 2 white chaise lounges and a 47", the downstairs with a white sofa in the living room and the dining room table always set, and the family room/kitchen area with a pub table, a big comfy leather couch, the 57" tv, the beer taps, and the 8-person spa about 5 steps out the patio door....  People walk into our house and go, you don't have kids.


----------



## Barthy73

Liisa said:


> 6 weeks until our Mexio trip (adults only all-inclusive here we come!!!)




Liisa,

Where are you staying in Mexico?  My wife and I stayed at Dreams over Thanksgiving, and boy was that a mistake!  No more non-adults only places for us!!!


----------



## Barthy73

Yep, Kat, you'll like the basement pics.  LOL

We just bought this house in September, mainly because of the basement.  It was completely unfinished, but we've made it our own!  You've got me beat in TV size, but I probably move more, mainly because the sports bar in the basement has 6 itself.  13' long bar, pool table, 3 satellite receivers.  What's most amazing about our basement is that the bar/gameroom is only 1 of 5 rooms that we finished.  When we get this project paid for, we'll furnish our theater room with 8-10 seats and a high def projector and 110" screen.  We've also got a dedicated poker room that will be furnished as soon as I build the poker table.  

People really look at me strangely when I tell them I have a urinal in my basement, but heck, the bathroom is right behind the 13' long bar!

We've also got a dedicated exercise room in our basement that's technically a bedroom, but with 3 other bedrooms plus our bonus room, I figure we can get away with more specialized rooms.


----------



## Liisa

Barthy73 said:


> Liisa,
> 
> Where are you staying in Mexico?  My wife and I stayed at Dreams over Thanksgiving, and boy was that a mistake!  No more non-adults only places for us!!!



We are booked at the Iberostar Grand Hotel Paraiso.  I can tolerate kids when we go to Disney.  But I prefer my relaxing beach vacation to be kid free.  It's our first time at the resort - so I'll have to let you know how we like it when we get back.


----------



## Barthy73

Suzibrat said:


> I'm stuck on the pics of Barthy's basement, wondering if I could live there



Is it sad that I have an "Open" sign in my garage window letting people know the bar is open, and we're ready to entertain?


----------



## Liisa

Barthy73 said:


> Is it sad that I have an "Open" sign in my garage window letting people know the bar is open, and we're ready to entertain?



Now that's southern hospitality!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> We've also got a dedicated exercise room in our basement that's technically a bedroom, but with 3 other bedrooms plus our bonus room, I figure we can get away with more specialized rooms.



We have a small house and not a lot of closet space- so I made one of the 3 bedrooms a "specialized" room.....

A walk-in closet!


----------



## Liisa

Madd, that must be one heck of a closet!  Love it!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Madd, that must be one heck of a closet!  Love it!



DH and I both can fit our clothes/shoes. We also fit the armoir and the dresser in there!


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> We have a small house and not a lot of closet space- so I made one of the 3 bedrooms a "specialized" room.....
> 
> A walk-in closet!



Madd, I'm glad I'm not the only one who though of doing this. That is so nice that you actually did. DH and I thought about doing this but.......the dog still needs his room with the office. The other bedroom is a guest room. We are in the first stages of finishing our basement (not as cool as Barthy's) but it will have a family/media room and a bar. We only have a 1400 sq house so the other half of the completed area of the basement will be storage and the exercise area. Those will be behind closed doors obviously. The rest will be an open space.
Don't expect pics anytime soon. We are doing most of the work ourselves. We tend to be motivated until someone calls with something good to do.


----------



## HockeyKat

Barthy73 said:


> Is it sad that I have an "Open" sign in my garage window letting people know the bar is open, and we're ready to entertain?



Hmm... how far a drive is it to Greenville from Raleigh...


----------



## Barthy73

From my house to my friend's house in Raleigh, it's about 4 hours on the dot... not too bad at all


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> Don't expect pics anytime soon. We are doing most of the work ourselves. *We tend to be motivated until someone calls with something good to do*.



OMG! That sounds like us! If it were not for BIL to get DHs butt in gear nothing would get done! 

But- then again- BIL has a very boring life. All he ever wants to do is some kind of "house project"  What sucks about that is, he expects DH to help him! Hello!? WE have a life outside of our home and want to live it! All BIL does is think up more projects for his house! 

DH and I on the other hand will have "plans" on doing something aorund the house, but that darn Harley just keeps calling our names when the weather is nice! DH's _famous_ expression when it comes to our projects....."Hey! You can't rush these things!" 

Priorities, ya know! 

BIL is a type A and has major A.D.D.-- but DH, if there were such a thing..is a type "Z" for zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz! He is so mellow I am surprised he does not fall asleep while standing up! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




 People are shocked to know they are brothers.

oooooo- This makes me think of the wooden sign we have in our living area- "_We may not have it all together, but together we have it all_" I think THAT is us in a nutshell!


.


----------



## Hixski

We are getting ready to head out for the day. Today is opening day for our beloved St. Louis Cardinals. DH's boss gave him a free night at the new Ameristar Casino Hotel so we are meeting some people and watch the game at the sports bar. Then we can get a bit of gambling in and head up to the hotel. We have heard they are all suites with jacuzzis. 

I guess we won't be getting any work done on the basement tonight.


----------



## Suzibrat

Barthy73 said:


> Is it sad that I have an "Open" sign in my garage window letting people know the bar is open, and we're ready to entertain?


That's quite friendly of you! Now why couldn't you live in my neck of the woods? lol Now is this strictly a sports bar? Or is there a corner section sporting a nifty pole?  
One thing I'm confused about is the urinal...is it right behind the bar? Usually bars have a "sink" back there but I guess you can never really tell what those bartenders are up to after you've belted down a few and can't see straight.


----------



## Barthy73

You know, we were actually talking about a pole this weekend...  Don't have one, yet.  Doubtful we will, as the wife didn't seem too interseted in the idea.

Okay, the urinal isn't *right* behind the bar, but the bathroom is only steps away from the bar!!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Barthy73 said:


> You know, we were actually talking about a pole this weekend...  Don't have one, yet.  Doubtful we will, as the wife didn't seem too interseted in the idea.
> 
> Okay, the urinal isn't *right* behind the bar, but the bathroom is only steps away from the bar!!


  Did you ever see that King Of Queens episode where Doug and Carrie bought a pole?  Carrie LOVED it and Doug finally had to break down and tell her she was NO  GOOD at it.

Well, I hope everyone's night was more eventful than mine.  

I must be getting old because I went to bed at like 8 o'clock!  I was folding clothes in on the bed and alls I could think was, "Man I am so tired I could crawl right into this bed."  I was tempted to just sweep the clothes onto the floor but I restrained myself, finished folding them and then went to bed.

Anyhoo, hello everyone!


----------



## Suzibrat

Barthy73 said:


> You know, we were actually talking about a pole this weekend... Don't have one, yet. Doubtful we will, as the wife didn't seem too interseted in the idea.
> 
> Okay, the urinal isn't *right* behind the bar, but the bathroom is only steps away from the bar!!


Madd and I will provide the dancing music and the show!  What do you say Madd? Heavy metal pole dancing??  Sounds like quite the night to me! 
Barthy I'm glad you cleared up my misconception about the urinal. I was worried about how you were washing those glasses  
Ok, I'll calm down now cuz it is still way too early for me to be so energetic. 
It's a rainy day here, April showers and all that fal-dee-rol. I seriously need to get out of this house and go somewhere because I'm losing what's left of my mind. Not DH's fault at all. He's really been no trouble to take care of and he's pretty much back on his feet. He'll be headed out for much of the weekend for the start of fishing season. None of that for me. If there isn't a proper bathroom I'm not going!
Hope you all have a great day and don't get pranked just because it's April 1st.


----------



## Barthy73

With a 13' long bar, I HAD to put in a dishwasher, of course.  :-D


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Madd and I will provide the dancing music and the show!  What do you say Madd? Heavy metal pole dancing??  Sounds like quite the night to me!



Okayyyyy but we may scare people with our music 

I have seen the King of Queens episode when Carrie pole dances- she was horrible 

Talking about pole dancing- Does anyone watch Weeds?!

Last night we were catching up on Season 2-
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




If you watch it, you know Celia (Elizabeth Perkins) hates Doug (Kevin Nealon)- and vice versa-

Doug's wife Dayna takes a "Stripper pole dancing" class for exercise. 

Celia is at Nancy's house and Doug walks in and of course says something very nasty to Celia. 

*Celia to Doug*: "_Doug- no wonder your wife prefers to *have sex* with a pole_"

*Doug*: "_My wife is *having sex* with a Polish guy_?!!!" lmao: I was PEEING when he said this! )

*Nancy*: "_No Doug!- she is referring to Dayna's stripper class_"

ahhhhh- I love Doug Wilson- anytime he is onscreen I freakin' crack up!


----------



## Suzibrat

Barthy73 said:


> With a 13' long bar, I HAD to put in a dishwasher, of course. :-D


       There are so many ways to interpret this statement!


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Okayyyyy but we may scare people with our music


We'll start off with something gentle to catch them off guard..maybe Billy Idol's "White Wedding" done by the Murderdolls? Then start beating them over the head with the good stuff. can I borrow your black lipstick? I'm fresh out   I can lend you one of those quite little black leather slave collars though, if you need one.....


----------



## PhotobearSam

Suzi...it's nice to see you here with a signature...I like the DJ cat...Nice to see you completely back...

Now back to our regularly scheduled program.


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> We'll start off with something gentle to catch them off guard..maybe Billy Idol's "White Wedding" done by the Murderdolls? Then start beating them over the head with the good stuff. can I borrow your black lipstick? I'm fresh out   I can lend you one of those quite little black leather slave collars though, if you need one.....



OH MY GUNNESS! It sounds like you have had this planned for QUITE some time! 

OK- Muderdolls- White Wedding is a good choice- 
In case anyone wants to check it out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6ZguWnVWpA 

I get to pick too-I think Rob Zombie's song _The Devils Rejects _, you might know it- it has a nice slowwww beat to it...... 

Click on Track#10- just a tiny clip
http://www.amazon.com/gp/recsradio/...pd_krex_dp_001_011?ie=UTF8&track=011&disc=001

 OMG- it is so funny how we can just amuse ourselves....


----------



## Suzibrat

PhotobearSam said:


> Suzi...it's nice to see you here with a signature...I like the DJ cat...Nice to see you completely back...
> 
> Now back to our regularly scheduled program.


Thank you Sam. I'm a compete woman once again


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> OH MY GUNNESS! It sounds like you have had this planned for QUITE some time!
> 
> OK- Muderdolls- White Wedding is a good choice-
> In case anyone wants to check it out:
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6ZguWnVWpA
> 
> I get to pick too-I think Rob Zombie's song _The Devils Rejects _, you might know it- it has a nice slowwww beat to it......
> 
> Click on Track#10- just a tiny clip
> http://www.amazon.com/gp/recsradio/...pd_krex_dp_001_011?ie=UTF8&track=011&disc=001
> 
> OMG- it is so funny how we can just amuse ourselves....


 
Madd, check out this Murderdolls clip and see if you can spot a very familiar face
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNMcqpr3q_I
I love Murderdolls and the offshoot from them "Wednesday 13"....
DH bought me the Murderdolls CD for Christmas, not knowing it had a DVD in it..he curses the day he ever bought it because I play it constantly and while he thinks all the guys are creeps I just think they are dead sexy! Different opinions are what makes the world go round, huh? (Bet Barthy won't let us within 20 feet of his bar by now!)


----------



## Barthy73

Suzibrat said:


> Bet Barthy won't let us within 20 feet of his bar by now!)



Guess I'd better be a bit more selective with who knows about my bar and open sign!


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Madd, check out this Murderdolls clip and see if you can spot a very familiar face
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNMcqpr3q_I
> I love Murderdolls and the offshoot from them "Wednesday 13"....
> DH bought me the Murderdolls CD for Christmas, not knowing it had a DVD in it..he curses the day he ever bought it because I play it constantly and while he thinks all the guys are creeps I just think they are dead sexy! Different opinions are what makes the world go round, huh? (Bet Barthy won't let us within 20 feet of his bar by now!)




Suzi! I LOVE the song!!!! Awesome! and better yet- HOT guys with LOTS of hair flying about! The one guitar player reminds me of Nikki Sixx!  

and yes, I see......MARILYN,  MARILYN,  .....FOR THE LOVE OF _GOD_! I LOVE MARILYN!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> Guess I'd better be a bit more selective with who knows about my bar and open sign!




oh- That's OK- _*we*_ wanna hang out with the Murderdolls and Marilyn anyway!  

WE need to be selective too ya know! *stomps off*


----------



## Barthy73

Hey, just in case anyone cares.  I know I'm *new* to this board, but my original post back a couple of years ago is below.  Thought you might enjoy hearing our story.

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=914101&page=38


----------



## Barthy73

maddhatir said:


> oh- That's OK- _*we*_ wanna hang out with the Murderdolls and Marilyn anyway!
> 
> WE need to be selective too ya know! *stomps off*



Well, they're probably much too soft for you, but we're going to see Def Leppard tonight


----------



## Barthy73

Hixski said:


> Today is opening day for our beloved St. Louis Cardinals. DH's boss gave him a free night at the new Ameristar Casino Hotel so we are meeting some people and watch the game at the sports bar. Then we can get a bit of gambling in and head up to the hotel. We have heard they are all suites with jacuzzis.



Sorry to hear your game got rained out.  Hope you still got to visit the casino and use the jacuzzi.  

I grew up in Dubuque, IA about 5 hours north of STL and don't miss the midwest at all!!


----------



## Hixski

Barthy73 said:


> Sorry to hear your game got rained out.  Hope you still got to visit the casino and use the jacuzzi.
> 
> I grew up in Dubuque, IA about 5 hours north of STL and don't miss the midwest at all!!



We love the St. Louis area. Weird weather is just normal in the midwest as you know.

Everything else was good. We went to a microbrew a few blocks from the casino and hotel. We went back to gamble for awhile and then had a couple more beers. By then it was midnight and we went back to the room. And thats all I'm telling at this point.


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Suzi! I LOVE the song!!!! Awesome! and better yet- HOT guys with LOTS of hair flying about! The one guitar player reminds me of Nikki Sixx!
> 
> and yes, I see......MARILYN,  MARILYN,  .....FOR THE LOVE OF _GOD_! I LOVE MARILYN!!!


 
And it just so happens that the little guitarist with the long long hair and the red stripes is none other than my Joey! I love that song and all the horror movie references. "Hey Norman Bates...how are your rates?"  What's the status on the Dimmu show? 



Barthy73 said:


> Well, they're probably much too soft for you, but we're going to see Def Leppard tonight


Have a good time tonight!...yup, they're way too soft for me But to each his own. My DH can't stand the stuff I listen to, hence the reason I will be travelling to Mass. by myself to see my beloved Slipknot.



Hixski said:


> We love the St. Louis area. Weird weather is just normal in the midwest as you know.
> 
> Everything else was good. We went to a microbrew a few blocks from the casino and hotel. We went back to gamble for awhile and then had a couple more beers. By then it was midnight and we went back to the room. And thats all I'm telling at this point.


Sounds like you had a *good *time!! What happens in St Louis stays in St. Louis????


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> Well, they're probably much too soft for you, but we're going to see Def Leppard tonight



ITA- to each his own!   Have a great time! (don't do anything I wouldn't do- or should I rephrase that to read- don't do anything I *would* do  well, only if ya want to  )



Suzibrat said:


> What's the status on the Dimmu show?



My brother called my a while ago and said he is going to see "the guy" who works at the club and who is in the band tonight. 

I am getting a little squirrelly b/c DH does not seem too keen on the idea now! 



> Have a good time tonight!...yup, they're way too soft for me But to each his own. My DH can't stand the stuff I listen to, hence the reason I will be travelling to Mass. by myself to see my beloved Slipknot.



 He will make you go alone! DH can care less about seeing a lot of the bands in concert. He likes the music- but can care less about the concerts- but he still goes with me.


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> He will make you go alone! DH can care less about seeing a lot of the bands in concert. He likes the music- but can care less about the concerts- but he still goes with me.


DH can't get any time off work during the summer and I will be gone about 3 days so this will be a solo trip for me. I promise I will behave myself...


----------



## Suzibrat

Where's everyone at today??? I've been on the go since I got up and this is the first time i've had a chance to post. Hope you're all having a good day!


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Where's everyone at today??? I've been on the go since I got up and this is the first time i've had a chance to post. Hope you're all having a good day!



Ready to get done work in 15 minutes- Then I have to run to ULTA and go food shopping- wooo whoooo  

So- Barthy- how was the concert!? Still recovering


----------



## Barthy73

maddhatir said:


> So- Barthy- how was the concert!? Still recovering



Just working today for a change.. all recovered.  I made it to work on time and everything.  

Didn't make it on the treadmill at 5:30am, however.  *laugh*


----------



## maddhatir

Well- we are going to see Dimmu Friday. 

My brother got the tix and is bringing them over tomorrow 

And DH will be there will bells on! How in the world, you ask, did that happen??

...Just a little friendly _bartering_.....and everyone walks away happy


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> ...Just a little friendly _bartering_.....and everyone walks away happy



We totally do this as well...  it usually gets EXPENSIVE for us.  But it's fun.  We call it flat out bribing!

My weekend is going to be shot.  Khabo gets discharged today from his knee surgery.  And we've got a 12-16 week recovery in front of us where he'll need to be on leash 100% of the time.  No running, jumping, playing...  and Pari won't understand that.  So I'm sure we have a long battle ahead of us playing referee.  They love to wrestle with each other.

DH is going to try to get some yard work done while I watch the dogs.  I'm not sure who is going to have the tougher job.


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> We totally do this as well...  it usually gets EXPENSIVE for us.  But it's fun.  We call it flat out bribing!



 It costs nothing to "barter" with your DH!


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> It costs nothing to "barter" with your DH!




I _really, really_ need to learn the fine art of bartering!


----------



## maddhatir

Hey Suzi- 

My brother was just here and I was telling him how much you admire- Hellhammer- he wanted to know if you like the drummer- Inferno from Behemoth?

He will be getting to the venue way early- he likes to get seats upstairs, first row. He said he will save us seats- this way I can get you some GOOD pics! 

I am getting excited! 

We were watching YouTube and he was educating me on some of the songs that I will hear tomorrow- 
Such as Dimmu's Mourning Palace, and Spellbound, and of course The Serpentine Offering and Behemoth's Libertheme not a video- but you can hear the song.

He was showing me a few pics that he posted on Monster Mania.

Dimmu





and Behemoth





I am sorry to everyone for being OT- but I am excited


----------



## PhotobearSam

Everyone...Come to the CB and Discuss...If you dare...LOL

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1777105


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Everyone...Come to the CB and Discuss...If you dare...LOL
> 
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1777105



Im-a-comin'

Right now I am stuck on a thread about a 13 year old being felt up and another parent is trying to save the poor dreg of society from a life of prositution! 

I said to these parents- ya know, you would all be surprised what the heck goes on behind your back!!!It would make your hair curl!  
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1777432


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> Im-a-comin'
> 
> Right now I am stuck on a thread about a 13 year old being felt up and another parent is trying to save the poor dreg of society from a life of prositution!
> 
> I said to these parents- ya know, you would all be surprised what the heck goes on behind your back!!!It would make your hair curl!
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1777432





WOW...That is one hot topic...People freak me out...


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Hey Suzi-
> 
> My brother was just here and I was telling him how much you admire- Hellhammer- he wanted to know if you like the drummer- Inferno from Behemoth? [quote/]
> *Tell your brother that I love Inferno! Talk about a solid black metal drummer!!!!! I also love Shagrath from Dimmu...sexy man!!! I can't wait to see the pictures. Hopefully you'll be able to score a few of Inferno for me.*
> *I majorly scored today..got great seats for the Mayhem Festival in August in Mansfield, Mass! I'm gonna see my beloved Knot!!!!! Got my hotel all bokked and now I'll be counting down the days. They have quite a few bands playing but I'm only interested in Slpknot of course! lol I love the 2 pics you posted.....*
> 
> 
> 
> PhotobearSam said:
> 
> 
> 
> Everyone...Come to the CB and Discuss...If you dare...LOL
> 
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1777105
> 
> 
> 
> *Hi Sam! The only thread I usually post on now is this one...safer that way and I stay out of trouble *
Click to expand...


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> *I majorly scored today..got great seats for the Mayhem Festival in August in Mansfield, Mass! I'm gonna see my beloved Knot!!!!! Got my hotel all bokked and now I'll be counting down the days. They have quite a few bands playing but I'm only interested in Slpknot of course! lol I love the 2 pics you posted.....*



Now I went on the Mayhem site- it lists the concert being in my area on Aug 15th- however, I went on the venue site and they do not show any info! 

They show concerts on Aug 9th and then skip to the 16th!


----------



## PhotobearSam

Suzibrat said:


> *Hi Sam! The only thread I usually post on now is this one...safer that way and I stay out of trouble *





I completely understand...You are exempt from this one...


----------



## WDWguru

You know what gets me about that thread? The number of people who say "oh I never really thought about it" or "I never wanted them until I got married/turned 30" and then just had them anyway because they were "supposed to". That BLOWS me away! How can you not give an inkling of consideration to such a huge, life altering decision? 

Can you imagine what the world would be like if the default were to NOT have them? It would be amazing, imho! And I don't just say that because it would mean less children. Every child would be honestly and truly WANTED. How ideal. I just don't see how people don't GET that.


----------



## PhotobearSam

WDWguru said:


> You know what gets me about that thread? The number of people who say "oh I never really thought about it" or "I never wanted them until I got married/turned 30" and then just had them anyway because they were "supposed to". That BLOWS me away! How can you not give an inkling of consideration to such a huge, life altering decision?
> 
> Can you imagine what the world would be like if the default were to NOT have them? It would be amazing, imho! And I don't just say that because it would mean less children. Every child would be honestly and truly WANTED. How ideal. I just don't see how people don't GET that.


----------



## WDWguru

Oh I'm honored, Sam! If only I were brave enough to post that over THERE! ACK! I did post my response over there but it's a bit more veiled.


----------



## ReaderGirl

Hi everybody.  Do any of you attend Mousefest (held in December -- www.mousefest.org)?  I've never been, but I've thought about it...

Have a good weekend.  
ReaderGirl


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:


> You know what gets me about that thread? The number of people who say "oh I never really thought about it" or "I never wanted them until I got married/turned 30" and then just had them anyway because they were "supposed to". That BLOWS me away! How can you not give an inkling of consideration to such a huge, life altering decision?
> 
> Can you imagine what the world would be like if the default were to NOT have them? It would be amazing, imho! And I don't just say that because it would mean less children. Every child would be honestly and truly WANTED. How ideal. I just don't see how people don't GET that.



ITA! I would start reading their response thinking, hey, one for us- but as I read on, I was thinking.......Whaaaaat? 

I find it amazing that people automatically THINK it is the thing "to do"

WAKE UP people- you do not need to be follow the "herd"


----------



## maddhatir

ReaderGirl said:


> Hi everybody.  Do any of you attend Mousefest (held in December -- www.mousefest.org)?  I've never been, but I've thought about it...
> 
> Have a good weekend.
> ReaderGirl



I have heard about it- however, never attended.


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> ITA! I would start reading their response thinking, hey, one for us- but as I read on, I was thinking.......Whaaaaat?
> 
> I find it amazing that people automatically THINK it is the thing "to do"
> 
> WAKE UP people- you do not need to be follow the "herd"




How about the "I am not sure but we are starting to try this month..."

 

This is one thing you should be SURE of...Terrible.


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> Now I went on the Mayhem site- it lists the concert being in my area on Aug 15th- however, I went on the venue site and they do not show any info!
> 
> They show concerts on Aug 9th and then skip to the 16th!


 
I was able to get special offer presale tickets so everything may not be available to the public yet. Have fun at the show tonight! Squeeze a booty for me if ya get a chance  



PhotobearSam said:


> I completely understand...You are exempt from this one...


I knew you'd understand! My horns are still holding up my halo though


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> I was able to get special offer presale tickets so everything may not be available to the public yet. Have fun at the show tonight! Squeeze a booty for me if ya get a chance



Thanks! There is an after party with a local radio station, they are doing their show from upstairs where we will be- not sure if the bands will be doing interviews. We might be long gone before then!

I am bringing both of my cameras and will be experimenting with the quality of the pics. I do not like to sit there and flash pics every 5 seconds- that darn flash gets real annoyng, real fast. 

DH said he does not think the cameras will zoom that far- But I will certainly try and see how far they go. 

I will squeeze Shagrath's booty and tell him it is from Suzibrat! Just hope he does not hit me! He does not seem like a booty grabbin' kinda guy!


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> My horns are still holding up my halo though



Oh- come on! Where is the tag fairy for this one!

Oh- that's right you have to frequent the CB for a tag!


----------



## Barthy73

maddhatir said:


> DH said he does not think the cameras will zoom that far- But I will certainly try and see how far they go.




Some advice.. don't zoom beyond the optical zoom of your camera.  Take your pictures at the highest resolution you can at maximum OPTICAL (not digital) zoom.  You can zoom on the computer when editing, and they'll look A LOT better than if you use the digital zoom on the camera.  The digital zoom just looses too many pixels and causes severe blurring!


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> Some advice.. don't zoom beyond the optical zoom of your camera.  Take your pictures at the highest resolution you can at maximum OPTICAL (not digital) zoom.  You can zoom on the computer when editing, and they'll look A LOT better than if you use the digital zoom on the camera.  The digital zoom just looses too many pixels and causes severe blurring!



I have no idea what you mean- I am a camera dummy- I have 2- but I am still not too swift! 

Just a question- does the high resolution make the shutter go slower??


----------



## Barthy73

The shutter itself won't go slower, but it will sometimes take a bit longer to write the image to your memory card.   You can tell when you're zooming optically, as you can hear the lens move.  When it stops and zooms further, that's digital.


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> The shutter itself won't go slower, but it will sometimes take a bit longer to write the image to your memory card.   You can tell when you're zooming optically, as you can hear the lens move.  When it stops and zooms further, that's digital.



OH! then I do know what you are talking about but never knew what it was! 

I have an Olympus SP-500UZ and I do not ever remember that zooming further. 

However, DH just bought me a smaller camera last month (Canon PowerShot SD950 IS) and I noticed that that one does it- I was wondering why it would stop and then zoom further! 

Thanks for the advice! I will try that! NO ADDITONAL ZOOMING! GOT IT

ETA-  Barthy- is that you with a cheetah? 

I never thought that phrase would come out of my mouth 

.


----------



## Barthy73

maddhatir said:


> Barthy- is that you with a cheetah?



Yep, it's from a big cat and primate rescue park about an hour north of Orlando called "Amazing Exotics."  Very cool place if you want to get away from all the screaming kids at Disney for a while!


----------



## Barthy73

And actually, no, it's not a cheetah; it's a leopard!


----------



## ufcrazy

My husband and I too have made a conscious decision not to have children.  It doesn't really bother me when people ask me about having kids.  I just tell them that we are not interested in having kids.  We enjoy our life as is and we enjoy spending time together.  We have been married for almost 7 years and we couldn't be happier.  We have a dog, a travel trailer and each other.  I teach 1st grade and get my fill daily of sweet, adorable faces.  Then, I send them home to their tired, over-stressed parents for the evening.  My life is full and fabulous.  End of story![/ COLOR]


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> And actually, no, it's not a cheetah; it's a leopard!



Ooops Sorry Very cool though! Seems I am not very good with cameras....and large cats! 



ufcrazy said:


> My husband and I too have made a conscious decision not to have children.  It doesn't really bother me when people ask me about having kids.  I just tell them that we are not interested in having kids.  We enjoy our life as is and we enjoy spending time together.  We have been married for almost 7 years and we couldn't be happier.  We have a dog, a travel trailer and each other.  I teach 1st grade and get my fill daily of sweet, adorable faces.  Then, I send them home to their tired, over-stressed parents for the evening.  My life is full and fabulous.  End of story!



Welcome welcome!


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> I will squeeze Shagrath's booty and tell him it is from Suzibrat! Just hope he does not hit me! He does not seem like a booty grabbin' kinda guy!


A handful of Inferno will suffice as well  



maddhatir said:


> Oh- come on! Where is the tag fairy for this one!
> 
> Oh- that's right you have to frequent the CB for a tag!


ooohh I bet the tag fairy walks a wide circle around and queens of Metal Darkness! 



Barthy73 said:


> And actually, no, it's not a cheetah; it's a leopard!


I love the pic, no matter what type of cat it is. Do you have a bigger one you could post for us? (I'm talking about cat pics here Madd! )



ufcrazy said:


> My husband and I too have made a conscious decision not to have children. It doesn't really bother me when people ask me about having kids. I just tell them that we are not interested in having kids. We enjoy our life as is and we enjoy spending time together. We have been married for almost 7 years and we couldn't be happier. We have a dog, a travel trailer and each other. I teach 1st grade and get my fill daily of sweet, adorable faces. Then, I send them home to their tired, over-stressed parents for the evening. My life is full and fabulous. End of story![/ COLOR]



  Hope you jump right in and post often!

It's bloody snowing here again but I don't care anymore cuz my lawn is full of Robins and that means spring is here!!!


----------



## 1goofy1

My DH & I are very happy without kids and have been married for 7.5 years.  I know that I will be bashed for this, but we do not like kids.  Everyone has their own opinions.  We souly love animals.  

Just wanted to show everyone our new furbaby.  Here is a picture of our furbaby Dundee.


----------



## Suzibrat

1goofy1 said:


> My DH & I are very happy without kids and have been married for 7.5 years. I know that I will be bashed for this, but we do not like kids. Everyone has their own opinions. We souly love animals.
> 
> Just wanted to show everyone our new furbaby. Here is a picture of our furbaby Dundee.


Aww what a doll face!!! Thanks for sharing!! Your opinion is welcome here and hope we'll hear from you often!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

1goofy1 said:


> My DH & I are very happy without kids and have been married for 7.5 years.  I know that I will be bashed for this, but we do not like kids.  Everyone has their own opinions.  We souly love animals.



no bashing here! DH and I feel the same way about kids. People don't have to like that fact but as long as they can just accept it and leave us alone, I'm fine!!

what an adorable doggy!!


----------



## PhotobearSam

ufcrazy said:


> My husband and I too have made a conscious decision not to have children.  It doesn't really bother me when people ask me about having kids.  I just tell them that we are not interested in having kids.  We enjoy our life as is and we enjoy spending time together.  We have been married for almost 7 years and we couldn't be happier.  We have a dog, a travel trailer and each other.  I teach 1st grade and get my fill daily of sweet, adorable faces.  Then, I send them home to their tired, over-stressed parents for the evening.  My life is full and fabulous.  End of story![ COLOR]






Welcome... Nice to meet you...We really need some new blood around here and since we are not going to birth any, it's nice to meet new recruits...


----------



## PhotobearSam

1goofy1 said:


> My DH & I are very happy without kids and have been married for 7.5 years.  I know that I will be bashed for this, but we do not like kids.  Everyone has their own opinions.  We souly love animals.
> 
> Just wanted to show everyone our new furbaby.  Here is a picture of our furbaby Dundee.



What a face...LOVE IT...is he/she a rescue?


----------



## Suzibrat

PhotobearSam said:


> Welcome... Nice to meet you...We really need some new blood around here and *since we are not going to birth any,* it's nice to meet new recruits...


Bwahahahahahahaha   
How's your weather up there Sam? Seeing any signs of spring yet? 

I suppose we won't hear from Madd today while she recuperates from last night. Hope she doesn't take too long becasue the suspense is killing me!
have a good day everyone!


----------



## PhotobearSam

Suzibrat said:


> Bwahahahahahahaha
> How's your weather up there Sam? Seeing any signs of spring yet?
> !




Spring is finally here...we are ankle deep in mud now...LOL


----------



## zima-cheryl

1goofy1 said:


> My DH & I are very happy without kids and have been married for 7.5 years.  I know that I will be bashed for this, but we do not like kids.  Everyone has their own opinions.  We souly love animals.



Don't feel bad - the older I get the more I come to the realization I don't care for kids either.  I just have no patience for them.  When ever possible I give them a wide berth.




1goofy1 said:


> Just wanted to show everyone our new furbaby.  Here is a picture of our furbaby Dundee.



_Toooooo _sweet!  Greyhound?  Certainly has that body shape...at least as best I can tell from the pix.


----------



## zima-cheryl

PhotobearSam said:


> Spring is finally here...we are ankle deep in mud now...LOL



That's Mud-season... it is that little known 5th season that comes between winter & spring.  And means tons of muddy little paw prints all over the new carpet!   

We have robins now too...and I've seen some red wing blackbirds, even my daffodils are trying to grow; but the juncos have yet to leave to go back to Canada.  Spring sure is slow arriving this year!!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

zima-cheryl said:


> Don't feel bad - the older I get the more I come to the realization I don't care for kids either.  I just have no patience for them.  *When ever possible I give them a wide berth.*


  That's how I'm becoming MORE and MORE!!  Just the other night at a resturant I specifically requested please do not sit us near any children.  Course, just before we finished our dinner they bring a family of 4 in and sit them by us.  Which, wouldn't have been so bad but the little girl was SCREAMING blue bloody murder!!!  Kicking and screaming!!  The owner even came over and said something to them and the dad was like, "Oh, she's just unhappy because she' NOT getting her way."  Someone in our party said to us, "Well it certainly looks like she's getting her way cause you're not doing anything to stop the tantrum."  It made the last part of the meal just miserable!  Then, when she stopped crying her brother and she started balling up napkins and throwing them at eachother.  Except, the napkins never hit eachother.  No, they were being flung all over the resturant and one even landed on another couples table!!!  We cut it short and got the heck out of there!!


1goofy1 said:


> My DH & I are very happy without kids and have been married for 7.5 years.  I know that I will be bashed for this, but we do not like kids.  Everyone has their own opinions.  We souly love animals.
> 
> Just wanted to show everyone our new furbaby.  Here is a picture of our furbaby Dundee.


Pretty baby!! No bashing here.  To each his own.  I don't understand why people think we have to like them.  I don't hate them.  I'm not fanatical about it.  I love my nieces and nephews but I don't want to spend all of my time with kids.



ufcrazy said:


> My husband and I too have made a conscious decision not to have children.  It doesn't really bother me when people ask me about having kids.  I just tell them that we are not interested in having kids.  We enjoy our life as is and we enjoy spending time together.  We have been married for almost 7 years and we couldn't be happier.  We have a dog, a travel trailer and each other.  I teach 1st grade and get my fill daily of sweet, adorable faces.  Then, I send them home to their tired, over-stressed parents for the evening.  My life is full and fabulous.  End of story!


 Welcome please feel free to post more often!!


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Hey everyone! Just thought I'd check in. My laptop has spent a week at the doctor because the backlight burned up and almost ruined the entire LCD. So I have a good deal of catching up to do. Hope everyone is doing ok.


----------



## maddhatir

I'm here! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I'm here!!

All I have to say about last night is...........*O-M-G!!!!!!!!!!!!* The concert was ...Sick! Incredible! Awesome!

I am SO glad we went- and so was DH!!! he said the bands were really good!

Bad news- My pics really stink!!!! I followed Barthy's advise and did not zoom too far- but my pics still look very grainy I was really disappointed. Barthy I was playing around with the camera in the dark when the first band was on- I found that the setting ISO3200 was the only thing that would let me even take pics in the dark! 

Suzi, guess WHAT!- Remember I told you they were having an after party- well, none of us were going to stay- so DH and I left- my brother and his friend were leaving however my brother went to the restroom that was past the bar.......WHO WAS SITTING AT THE BAR!!!!!!!!!!????????
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




THIS! THIS WAS SITTING AT THE FREAKING BAR!!!!! THIS VISION OF HOTTNESS!....Orion, the bass player from Behemoth! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	






And I left- I freaking LEFT! All I had to do was turn my head to the left before I walked downstairs and I would have seen him!!! My brother said he was just hanging out at the bar talking to people.....I could have been a people! Me!

I was drooling just watching him on stage the whole time Behemoth was playing- All my pics of him stink- The one above is from the internet 

This is my crappy, blurred pic of him 





Behemoth





Dimmu





And some really crappy video footage from my camera 




Suzi- I did not get to see Inferno- he was tucked in the back heinf the band! And with no good camera zoom- it was impossible to get a pic!


----------



## Suzibrat

Ohhhh Madd!! Still awesome pics as far as I'm concerned but you need a headsmack for not sticking around afterwards! Bad woman! bad bad! (Although I'm sure you have been beating yourself for most of the day, huh?) I knew you were gonna love the concert and i'm so glad I kept telling you to GO. Shagrath looks yummy as usual. How's your neck today? You musta done a tad bit of headbanging, eh?  But you missed a chance to have a nip with Orion......I'm picturing the V8 commercial right now and you hitting yourself again and again.  
You had awesome seats that's for sure! 
Are you going to do Mayhem Fest? Probably the Mass show is too far for you, huh? I have a really good seat for that and hope to get some fabu pics.  

Michelle! Good to see you! Hope your weekend is going better now that you have your puter back. I go nuts when I'm without one and believe me, it's not a pretty sight! 
I have to get to bed. I was up at 4am thursday and yesterday and never went to bed until 3 this morning, then woke back up at 7. talk about feeling punchy


----------



## Suzibrat

I know ya all went to Barthy's bar last night and you're hungover so that's why this place is dead today.


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> I know ya all went to Barthy's bar last night and you're hungover so that's why this place is dead today.








No, Barthy said I am not allowed in his bar remember he called it "being selective" 

Just joshin' Barthy- he might sic his leopard on me! 

It is quiet all over the DIS! Well, on my regular threads anyway 

Last night DH and I hibernated and we just watched an episode of The Tudors and then moved on and watched the entire 2nd disc of the 2nd season of Weeds. 

Today it is a cold, rainy crappy day here in NJ. 

This morning DH and I watched a movie on Starz- I think it was called- _Next_ with Nichoas Cage and Jessica Biel- the movie was just OK- but let me tell you- Jessica is one hot chick!!! If I can look like anyone right now- it would be her!!! It used to be Pam Anderson- but she is so 5 minutes ago! 

I then looked at my bathroom closet and started ripping everything out of it and thowing crap away. 

Now I am just watching the Flyers vs Penguins while DISing. Thank god! we made it into the playoffs! At least that means a few more games for sure- we just have to make it past the first round! If we win this game we will move up to 6th- I was just happy that we were 8th! Well, not real happy b/c if the Devils are in 1st place- we would have to play them in the first round.....NOT a good thing! The NJ Devils have always been a thorn in our side! Our rivals from up the turnpike! 

So!? How was everyone's weekend???


----------



## Barthy73

Here, Leopard, Leopard...

As Dennis Leary would say, "Happy F***ING Monday."  I hate Mondays   but we had a good weekend.  Got to meet some fellow Dis' people in our bar Satruday night.  Had a great time!  

Hope everyone has a great week, even the freaky headbanger metalheads.


----------



## Suzibrat

Barthy73 said:


> Here, Leopard, Leopard...
> 
> As Dennis Leary would say, "Happy F***ING Monday." I hate Mondays  but we had a good weekend. Got to meet some fellow Dis' people in our bar Satruday night. Had a great time!
> 
> Hope everyone has a great week, even the freaky headbanger metalheads.


See, I knew he was hanging out with the Dis'ers but the Queens Of Metal Darkness weren't invited....

psst..Madd look what i did to Barthy's Leopard...


----------



## Barthy73

I never said y'all weren't invited, and if you lived closer, you probably would be.  

Kidless folks are always welcome, but I can't say you'd love my music selections.


----------



## Suzibrat

Barthy73 said:


> I never said y'all weren't invited, and if you lived closer, you probably would be.
> 
> Kidless folks are always welcome, but I can't say you'd love my music selections.


Madd and I can be your Heavy Metal Lounge Lizards! If she's anything like me she's always packing her own tunes somewhere on her body.


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Madd and I can be your Heavy Metal Lounge Lizards! If she's anything like me she's always packing her own tunes somewhere on her body.



How did you know!? I have a chip inserted under my skin- totally scrambles any and all non metal music- tunes in Hard Attack on every radio within a 100 mile radius!


----------



## Suzibrat

maddhatir said:


> How did you know!? I have a chip inserted under my skin- totally scrambles any and all non metal music- tunes in Hard Attack on every radio within a 100 mile radius!


BTW I saw your Johnny last night in that Willie Wonka movie....totally creeped me out!  (Putting on my flame retardant suit)


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> BTW I saw your Johnny last night in that Willie Wonka movie....totally creeped me out!  (Putting on my flame retardant suit)



No flames here! He is very odd looking in that movie- Tim Burton does not know how to use JDs looks in his movies 

But come on- you have to love the way Willie did not like the kids! That was hilarious!

Can't wait for Public Enemies to come out (supposedly this summer!) 

And then there have been rumors for months now that he is supposed to play Barnabas Collins in a remake of Dark Shadows!!!!  OMG! JD as a VAMPIRE! Surprise- I love vampires!


----------



## Hixski

I would give anything to see JD play a vampire. They rate right up there with aliens in my weird world of dreams!!! Madd knows what I am talking about!!

For everyone else I have the weirdest dreams. Since I am a Sci-Fi freak they usually involve aliens. But next comes vampires. I tell you, you haven't lived until a vampire has bit you in your dreams.....especially if it turns out to be JD!!


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> But next comes vampires. I tell you, you haven't lived until a vampire has bit you in your dreams.....especially if it turns out to be JD!!



I 2nd that one Hix....wench sista 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


 

Hix- not sure if you remember me posting this over there- but I remember having that yummy dream about JD after I spent about an hour posting all kinds of pics of his lips on the other side! Me, JD and DH were upstairs in the kitchen, DH proceeds to walk downstairs........I thought JD was going to follow however, he decided to remain upstairs for a few minutes......the kiss seemed SO real!!! 

OMG! I just remembered I had another dream last month- It involved a xanax before bed and JD dream  Hix- I have to go back over there and read what it was- I forget now!


----------



## Barthy73

Was wondering why this board was so dead yesterday...   

Then I saw this article:   http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24019330/

Guess Madd and Suzi are in mourning...


----------



## Suzibrat

Barthy73 said:


> Was wondering why this board was so dead yesterday...
> 
> Then I saw this article: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24019330/
> 
> Guess Madd and Suzi are in mourning...


Barthy -  No, not this girl...I'm not a Johnny Depp fan at all. Actually, I don't think there are any actors that I get the drools over. I'll stick with the Men Of Metal.  
I have been straight out the last few days working and tomorrow I'm taking the day off and going to the mall!

Madd- you kept talking about a JD dream and I was thinking "she's dreaming of Jack Daniels?" I'm a die hard jack daniels drinker but never had dreams about the stuff! Not even after a good bender! Then it dawned on me that you were talking about your Johnny!

Hixski-if Johnny ever shows up in one of my dreams to bite me on the neck I'm sending him straight to your house.  After having him creep me out in Willie Wonka I don't want those teeth anywhere near me!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Suzibrat said:


> ...snipped....
> 
> Hixski-if Johnny ever shows up in one of my dreams to bite me on the neck I'm sending him straight to your house.  *After having him creep me out in Willie Wonka I don't want those teeth anywhere near me!*


LOL!!!  His teeth in Willie Wonka WERE creepy!!

So, my dad calls last night, from New Jersey, and has informed me that he would like to come down to see us. . . . .



THIS  WEEKEND!!  

And stay for about 5 or 6 days.  We are so not prepared for house guests.  My guest bedroom is currently being used as storage space until I can get it up into the attic!  The attic needs an access door put in.  Oh, and we don't have a bed in there yet.  Talk about, "No pressure."

I really need to be home cleaning and not here working but no such luck.  I've got to save my days for when my dad actually does come down.


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> Was wondering why this board was so dead yesterday...
> 
> Then I saw this article:   http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24019330/
> 
> Guess Madd and Suzi are in mourning...



That would be me and Hix! 

And do you know how many times this has been said over the past few years- everytime they do a report on it- I say, I will believe it, when I see it. And just sit tight. 

It does not matter to me that he is married anyway- I will still drool just as much over him!


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Hixski-if Johnny ever shows up in one of my dreams to bite me on the neck I'm sending him straight to your house.  After having him creep me out in Willie Wonka I don't want those teeth anywhere near me!



Hey- hey- hey- Now Hix knows about the oath we took- we must share JD! What is it Hix?- "do what you will with him or leave him as you found him and then get to the back of the line"    It has been a while since I had to make that promise to anyone! 



ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> So, my dad calls last night, from New Jersey, and has informed me that he would like to come down to see us. . . . .
> 
> 
> 
> THIS  WEEKEND!!



Oh No! I panic when people call and say they are just going to "stop by"! I am running around the house trying to straighten up-- 

GOOD LUCK!

.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Hello all...If anyone here has had any experience with Xanax or a xanax alternative, could you please let me know by posting here...

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1783556


It came up "elsewhere" so some people don't want to post...


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Hello all...If anyone here has had any experience with Xanax or a xanax alternative, could you please let me know by posting here...
> 
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1783556
> 
> 
> It came up "elsewhere" so some people don't want to post...



Sorry I deleted my original post- 

My doc has me on .5mgs of Ativan whenever I need it. It helps when you are feeling stressed. With the .5mgs I can function, drive, whatever- I am perfectly fine- I just do not feel "as stressed out" Sometimes I take 2 and even at that dose- I am fine. I have been taking them for years. Not every day- but sometimes you can just "feel" you need it. 

Are you asking your doc for a rx? 

They are really no big deal. As long as you take the mgs your doc prescribes you will be fine. If you feel it is too much or not enough- just feel it out and adjust how much you take.

ETA- Sorry Sam- just read your other thread as to why you are asking about Xanax. Do you feel the Lorazepam is not working well enough for you?? Maybe your doc can raise the mgs? 

.


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Hey- hey- hey- Now Hix knows about the oath we took- we must share JD! What is it Hix?- "do what you will with him or leave him as you found him and then get to the back of the line"    It has been a while since I had to make that promise to anyone!



Don't worry Madd!!! Just one bite and I will send him your way. Ooohhh....that sounds a bit kinky doesn't it!!??


----------



## Hixski

PhotobearSam said:


> Hello all...If anyone here has had any experience with Xanax or a xanax alternative, could you please let me know by posting here...
> 
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1783556
> 
> 
> It came up "elsewhere" so some people don't want to post...



I have a prescription for Xanax but I only take it when I fly. That would be about 3 or 4 times a year. I started getting anxiety when I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism. The anxiety pretty much died down when they got my thyroid regulated better but I do still use it when I fly. The weird thing is I like to fly. 

Sorry, not much help because I don't use it on any regular basis.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> I have a prescription for Xanax but I only take it when I fly. That would be about 3 or 4 times a year. I started getting anxiety when I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism. The anxiety pretty much died down when they got my thyroid regulated better but I do still use it when I fly. The weird thing is I like to fly.
> 
> Sorry, not much help because I don't use it on any regular basis.



I take 2 Ativan when I fly- I have been for a few years.

There was a time a few years back that I insisted we drive to Disney, about 3 or 4 times b/c I was so scared to fly!
The very last time we drove, on our way home, we were stuck in DC traffic on a Sunday afternoon- and I said NEVER AGIAN! So now I pop to Ativan and hop on the plane.

So Sam- I am not sure why you are worried if you have been taking them for some time? Is it that you think you need them more for your anxiety and are worried too much will have side effects??

Like I said- maybe ask your doc for something al ittle more "mellow" than xanax if you are worried 

You make me need my Ativan trying to keep up with you!   Just joking!


----------



## PhotobearSam

I am worried about addiction and I hate taking pills...They will only prescribe 15 pills a month for me ( but then again, I have never asked for more) and I am always afraid I will run out so I end up not taking any so I will not be short...Stupid I know but in the middle of a panic attack, I don't think straight.

I had my first panic attack when I was 20 and I thought I was having a heart attack. I hate feeling like I am not in control. I hate it so much that I have NEVER even been drunk. So can you imagine the hell I go through when in full panic...It's torture...

I have just recently decided to be more proactive in my approach to this and I want to be open with my Doc but it's so hard. I get all worked up just going into his office...

I am going to try to just take the Lorazepan more often and ask for 30 pills a month and then I will only refill if I need to and not worry running out. 

My thanks to all...


----------



## Suzibrat

You know Sam, you have really good timing because last Monday I ended up at the doctor's, thinking I was having a heart attack. It felt like my inner body was racing so fast it was going to break thru my skin and run away. Couldn't breathe. chest pains, the whole nine yards. Turns out that I was having a panic attack. I have had them before but not like this! I had a few other issues going on as well that didn't help matters any...and I'll be honest with you all about them because no sense leaving out details and having people scratching their heads. LOL I also was suffering from a touch alcohol poisoning..yup. I had been on a bender from 8am Friday morning until I passed out Sunday night. Monday morning I had drank a pot (12 cups) of super strong coffee, smoked about a pack of cigs and that's when the trouble hit. The doctor has begged me to detox myself for a bit by not having any booze, cutting back on the coffee and cigs, which I am doing. Haven't drank a drop since that Sunday and am aiming to go for the entire month without any. (alcohol, not coffee!) She put me on Clonazepam but if I take a whole one I feel like a zombie so shetold me to cut them in half. I can have them up to 3 times a day if I want but haven't had to use them that often. It's good to have them though. Yesterday I had to take one, hated the thought, but once it started working I was able to get on with my day. Hope baring my soul doesn't put you all off. See why I'd never make a good parent?


----------



## PhotobearSam

Suzibrat said:


> You know Sam, you have really good timing because last Monday I ended up at the doctor's, thinking I was having a heart attack. It felt like my inner body was racing so fast it was going to break thru my skin and run away. Couldn't breathe. chest pains, the whole nine yards. Turns out that I was having a panic attack. I have had them before but not like this! I had a few other issues going on as well that didn't help matters any...and I'll be honest with you all about them because no sense leaving out details and having people scratching their heads. LOL I also was suffering from a touch alcohol poisoning..yup. I had been on a bender from 8am Friday morning until I passed out Sunday night. Monday morning I had drank a pot (12 cups) of super strong coffee, smoked about a pack of cigs and that's when the trouble hit. The doctor has begged me to detox myself for a bit by not having any booze, cutting back on the coffee and cigs, which I am doing. Haven't drank a drop since that Sunday and am aiming to go for the entire month without any. (alcohol, not coffee!) She put me on Clonazepam but if I take a whole one I feel like a zombie so shetold me to cut them in half. I can have them up to 3 times a day if I want but haven't had to use them that often. It's good to have them though. Yesterday I had to take one, hated the thought, but once it started working I was able to get on with my day. Hope baring my soul doesn't put you all off. See why I'd never make a good parent?




Thank you for your honesty...We all have our demons. I have been neglecting my work and I have been avoiding my parents because my anxiety has gotten the better of me...That's why I was asking if anything was better than what I have.


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Thank you for your honesty...We all have our demons. I have been neglecting my work and I have been avoiding my parents because my anxiety has gotten the better of me...That's why I was asking if anything was better than what I have.



Since we are spilling our guts....... 

I do also take Lexapro for my anxiety. I have never had a panic attack though. The Lexapro helps me a lot- but when I get really stressed- I go for the Ativan. And I take Wellbutrin for my "mild" depression. I have been on both for YEARS.

A few months ago I tried to go off of the Lexapro- with the help of my doc- b/c the side effects are weird for me- my head just feels like someone is taking it and just shaking it- I feel like I get off balance- this happens even if I miss a few doses. 

Anyway- I thought I was ready to get off the Lexapro- my doc did not want me to- but I insisted- about 2 months went by and in that time is when I hurt my back - I was totally off the Lexapro my then, but with my back meds and worrying about my back- I kept forgetting to take my Wellbutrin on a regular schedule.

Well- after a few weeks I got into a MAJOR funk! It really scared me feeling that low and there was nothing I can do to feel better- the Ativan would not help with the funk I was in b/c it was not really anxiety I was feeling- it was depression- I was so scared- I started back on both the Lexapro and the Wellbutrin regularly! 

So I am now I feel so much better.

Sam- maybe you should be on something regularly?? You can avoid the major panic attacks etc b/c the meds will constantly be working for you.


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> Sam- maybe you should be on something regularly?? You can avoid the major panic attacks etc b/c the meds will constantly be working for you.


It is scary isn't it? I am glad you were able to see it for yourself because I almost never see it happen until DH tells me I am too down.

Thanks

I am going to try the Lorazepan more regularly and talk to my Doc about options...To top things off today, my Dad has gone to the hospital for a lump on his inner thigh...I am so stressed...It never stops does it?

I think this is a major reason I don't want kids...I would always worry too much.


----------



## zima-cheryl

PhotobearSam said:


> ...and I am always afraid I will run out so I end up not taking any so I will not be short...Stupid I know but in the middle of a panic attack, I don't think straight.



My problem is insomnia, not panic attacks like you struggle with, but I'm the same way w/my Ambien.  

I hoard the pills even when I know I s/be taking one because I'm always afraid if I use them all now I may have even a worse bout of insomnia later... whenever that would be?  
In the mean time I leave myself miserable & exhausted.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

thanks for the info folks...my DH suffers from panic attacks and I suffer from depression(though I've yet to ever go see someone about it...) so this info is pretty good!


----------



## Barthy73

Other than a few allergy medications and advil once in a while, thankfully, I'm drug free.. except of course:  TEQUILA!!  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UoLdONp-enc


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> thanks for the info folks...my DH suffers from panic attacks and I suffer from depression(though I've yet to ever go see someone about it...) so this info is pretty good!



My DH says almost everyone he knows is on some type of medication for depression or anxiety! 

I think a lot of people always think it is "just me" and come to find out- there are a lot of us in the same boat.

Now DH is another story- They should bottle his blood and sell it as a sedative- I think I may have said this before- he is so mellow, I am waiting for him to fall asleep while standing up! He is so chilled and nothing really bothers him-  

I tell him all the time- you do not know how lucky you are!

And this is for everyone here who is having problems  Meds are good if they help you.


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> Other than a few allergy medications and advil once in a while, thankfully, I'm drug free.. except of course:  TEQUILA!!
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UoLdONp-enc



OMG Barthy THAT was freaking hilarious!!! I like the side effects- loss of virginity, table dancing and karaoke  

You know- some guys wonder why women are on meds- I always tell them- it is because of the guys in our lives are such dopes, they drive us crazy


----------



## maddhatir

OMG- I was rockin' out while working- and then this song came on! OMG! I was bouncing in my seat.

It is hilarious the way they use Pavarotti singing!

I also read that Max Cavelera used a tribe in his native Brazil to play in the video! It looks like it was filmed there too.

Max is TOO COOL! Can't wait to get the new CD by Cavalera Conspiracy!!!!!   

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSdfnC4Dc10

I kind of feel like this is ON topic for the CF thread b/c I would say NO people that have kids- would have any idea what this music is OR let alone have a chance to experience a concert other than, Bob the Builder on Ice or something!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

So, I'm just checking in.

It turns out that my dad won't  be able to come down.  It's good in one sense because we really aren't prepared for guests.  We just moved into an older home that needs work but it would have been nice to spend some time with him and have him see our new house.

Also, it would have been a great excuse to take some days off.  I want to take a day or two off.  I need to take a day or two off but I can' justify it when I don't have alot of days yet.  Kind of like hoarding the meds thing.  I know I'll get more days but what if I need them before then?  What if I get sick or the car breaks down or WHATEVER and I've used all my days?  Would I get in trouble?  Would I not get paid?   I know I'm totally babbling.  I apologize.  I'm just a little wrung up after the day I've had.  It was bad!!  And alls I kept thinking was I need to get out of here for awhile.

Thank God it's Friday is all I can say.


----------



## maddhatir

ForTheLoveofDisney said:


> So, I'm just checking in.
> 
> It turns out that my dad won't  be able to come down.  It's good in one sense because we really aren't prepared for guests.  We just moved into an older home that needs work but it would have been nice to spend some time with him and have him see our new house.
> 
> Also, it would have been a great excuse to take some days off.  I want to take a day or two off.  I need to take a day or two off but I can' justify it when I don't have alot of days yet.  Kind of like hoarding the meds thing.  I know I'll get more days but what if I need them before then?  What if I get sick or the car breaks down or WHATEVER and I've used all my days?  Would I get in trouble?  Would I not get paid?   I know I'm totally babbling.  I apologize.  I'm just a little wrung up after the day I've had.  It was bad!!  And alls I kept thinking was I need to get out of here for awhile.
> 
> Thank God it's Friday is all I can say.



 You poor thing! I am sending you a "virtual Ativan" b/c you sure sound like you need it! Sorry you will not get to see your dad! maybe you can take a trip to good ol' NJ! Everything is turning green here.

You know, Friday always seems to make things better! 

I have had an easy week work wise- I am all caught up posting all last  month's checks and I am ahead of myself for April. I am going into work on Monday just to help the billing girl who is way behind. 

FortheLove- I am not sure how it would go if you needed to take off- I would assume they would give you a choice of not being paid- or just making up the time- is your boss cool?

I have just the opposite problem- My year is up May 9th and I have 5 days to take off by then! UGH- Tuesday I have to go to the dentist- so I figure I will use one for that- wooo who, the dentist-- let's have a party-  I DO have to take 2 Ativan before going- I am deathly afraid of the dentist even though I have never been hurt by one After it is all done- I always think- what the %$#@ am I afraid of! dork. Can't neglect the teeth- so must take drugs..............

DH said he wants to take a day or 2 with me- so I am just waiting for him to let me know. and as far as the remaining 2 days- I like to take Monday's off- so I might do that. 

What is everyone's BIG plans for the weekend? 

Tonight we are going to dinner with one of the last couples we know who don't have kids.......however, they are pregnant! 

The guy is my cousin- he never wanted kids. 
 We all (DH, me and my cousin) would get invited to a few of our friend's kid's b-day parties and he would FA-REAK when the kids blew out the candles- he would say he was not eating any cake b/c the kids SPIT ON IT He would get so mad  Like it was all about him!

I guess things change huh? NOT for me though! 

I just had to mail out my tax return- yuk- of course I OWED the State of NJ! We get back $$ for Federal. Of course, no breaks for us people. 

Well- enough rambling from me too!

Bye for now!


----------



## Hixski

No really big plans for us for the weekend. We work weird schedules so we don't always have weekends off. 

DH is working tomorrow and Sunday for OT. I don't get off work until 7 in the morning. I will sleep till 3PM. So Saturday night will just be lazy. Sunday I need to get some more painting done in our master bathroom until DH comes home from work. We then have to hit our neighborhood Hooters (we are friends with the bartender) to use our BYGO free wings coupon. Monday night is date night and I don't know where we are going. Tuesday we are going to the STL Cardinals game. I just won tickets from work and my boss brought them over to my office for me. Club level seats and a parking pass to boot. 

Just our somewhat normal weekend. Next weekend will be more exciting. We will be going to California to see our friends. Saturday till Tuesday. They have 2 girls, 8 and 10. The oldest has a softball tournament on Saturday. We told them just to come get us between games and we will watch whatever games she needs to play in. Their girls are great but I'm sure I will have some stories about some of the others when I get back.


----------



## bzlitme

Funny but I also take Xanax only when I fly. I actually like to fly but get really nervous like a day before so the Xanax takes the edge off.


----------



## maddhatir

Hixski said:


> *Monday night is date night and I don't know where we are going*. Tuesday we are going to the STL Cardinals game. I just won tickets from work and my boss brought them over to my office for me. Club level seats and a parking pass to boot.
> 
> Just our somewhat normal weekend. Next weekend will be more exciting. We will be going to California to see our friends. Saturday till Tuesday. They have 2 girls, 8 and 10. The oldest has a softball tournament on Saturday. We told them just to come get us between games and we will watch whatever games she needs to play in. Their girls are great but I'm sure I will have some stories about some of the others when I get back.



Date night sounds like a good idea- DH and I should start doing that- especially since it is getting warmer- we can go to dinner someplace that has outdoor seating! 

Love FREE tickets! My boss used to give me free Flyers tix- but I think he forgets I work for him anymore since I work from home, I rarely see him- when he sees me he always says "Heyyyyy, it's the new girl!" I have been working for him for 12 years! 

Hey Hix CA!!!? Are you close to DL???

Last night we went to dinner- and this little girl kept RUNNING past our table, back and forth- the floor was bouncing. I felt my body tensing but everyone else at my table just kept talking 

We kept busting on my cousin
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




 (the one we had dinner with who is have his forst child...he is 41) saying he will never get to take his daily naps after the baby is born- he LOVES to nap- 

 we said no more adult only all-inclusives! He said "oh no- I am going to have to vacation places were there is poop in the pool!" 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


   

 He drives a corvette- where is the baby seat going?!

 no more just spur of the moment hopping a plane to another state to see the NJ Devils or the PA Phillies play another team

 This is the kind of person he is- he said for the baby shower- he is registering at Best Buy b/c he wants a new TV!- I said- No more "it's all about me"!! He did that for their wedding shower- 

 oh- he did say he would eat cake if it had his onw child's spit on it from blowing out the candles- that is a big step for him


----------



## maddhatir

bzlitme said:


> Funny but I also take Xanax only when I fly. I actually like to fly but get really nervous like a day before so the Xanax takes the edge off.



Welcome- another NJ person!


----------



## maddhatir

I have a question-

I am a dork when it comes to downloading music- I think I am one of the last people on earth NOT to have an IPod!

I am more of a CD- Satellite radio kinda gal- however, I have a whole list of CDs I want to buy and DH said- why not just download the songs onto a disc......... 

OK- I would if I knew 1. how to do it- and 2. where the heck to find the music.

I Googled music downloads and I see Napster and Rhapsody- Rhapsody is 89 cents a song- well, after I download the whole CD for 89 cents a song- I can just go buy the CD at the store!

I am not one of those people who buy a CD b/c of one song- I enjoy listening to all the other songs on the CD too! I usually buy a CD b/c of the BAND not b/c of a SONG.

So- what I am asking- what site is the best and is it worth me paying for every song- or should I go and buy the CD?

Thanks peeps.


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> I have a question-
> 
> I am a dork when it comes to downloading music- I think I am one of the last people on earth NOT to have an IPod!
> 
> I am more of a CD- Satellite radio kinda gal- however, I have a whole list of CDs I want to buy and DH said- why not just download the songs onto a disc.........
> 
> OK- I would if I knew 1. how to do it- and 2. where the heck to find the music.
> 
> I Googled music downloads and I see Napster and Rhapsody- Rhapsody is 89 cents a song- well, after I download the whole CD for 89 cents a song- I can just go buy the CD at the store!
> 
> I am not one of those people who buy a CD b/c of one song- I enjoy listening to all the other songs on the CD too! I usually buy a CD b/c of the BAND not b/c of a SONG.
> 
> So- what I am asking- what site is the best and is it worth me paying for every song- or should I go and buy the CD?
> 
> Thanks peeps.



I actually have 2 I-Pods & love them (I have a video + a shuffle).  
You should think about getting one.

I use ITunes (http://www.apple.com/itunes/overview) for buying all my music any more.  You are right the cost comes out about even on the albums...sometimes $1 more or less... but close in price to the stores.  

ITunes is free, you just have to install it on your PC.  They have 90% of anything I've ever wanted, although some of the more eclectic music they don't carry, so you have to go the old fashion route of buying a real CD.
ITunes also has 1 or 2 free songs available each week...occasionally there is a good one, but usually they stink.

Once the music is in ITunes you can copy it (assuming you have a PC w/a CD writer) to a CD.  I do this for my car - that way if anything comes up missing its no big deal...I just make another copy.  I also like that you can mix/match & make your own CD's.  (Certain music mixes just work better during the summer in a convertible you know!  )

When I first got ITunes it took about 2 weeks to load all our CD's into the computer.  I like that I can choose what to copy from ITunes onto each I-Pod.  I keep a short list on the shuffle + a few WDW podcasts to take to the gym.   The other one has tons of music + 5 or 6 movies at any time.  

DH uses Limewire to get his music: www.limewire.com (although we don't condone downloading of illegal music  )

Hope that helps some.


----------



## Hixski

maddhatir said:


> Date night sounds like a good idea- DH and I should start doing that- especially since it is getting warmer- we can go to dinner someplace that has outdoor seating!
> 
> Hey Hix CA!!!? Are you close to DL???



Monday night has been our date night for a long time. DH and I are both off on Tuesdays so we can do whatever we want and sleep in on Tuesdays. Try it you will like it. 

No DL for us. We will be in Sacramento. We always go somewhere new when we go out there to see our friends. We went with them to San Francisco for the day. Napa for wine tasting. (Me pushing an umbrella stroller for the day at Napa because the youngest daughter only wanted me to push. She was 4 at the time)  One summer we went to Lake Tahoe for the day. They are close to all that. It's great!! 




maddhatir said:


> I have a question-
> 
> I am a dork when it comes to downloading music- I think I am one of the last people on earth NOT to have an IPod!
> 
> I am more of a CD- Satellite radio kinda gal- however, I have a whole list of CDs I want to buy and DH said- why not just download the songs onto a disc.........
> 
> OK- I would if I knew 1. how to do it- and 2. where the heck to find the music.
> 
> I Googled music downloads and I see Napster and Rhapsody- Rhapsody is 89 cents a song- well, after I download the whole CD for 89 cents a song- I can just go buy the CD at the store!
> 
> I am not one of those people who buy a CD b/c of one song- I enjoy listening to all the other songs on the CD too! I usually buy a CD b/c of the BAND not b/c of a SONG.
> 
> So- what I am asking- what site is the best and is it worth me paying for every song- or should I go and buy the CD?
> 
> Thanks peeps.



As I hang my head in shame I will say I don't have an IPod either. It's not because I'm a dinosaur or anything (I work in IT for crying out loud)  I just have never gotten around to getting one. Not a top priority for us I guess. Someone here will have some info. At the risk of sounding like an old lady whenever we want to know about anything new like that we just talk to all the 20 somethings we know. They know their electronics, I will give them that.


----------



## Rozzie

Haven't posted in many a moon.  Thought I'd give a little update.  Remember how I was griping about the whole working every holiday thing since we don't have kids?  Well found a new job, in a GI Lab, only have to work every 8th weekend, call once a week, and just one holiday a year, which rotates, since there are 8 full time RN's, if I work Christmas this year, I don't work it again for 8 years.   (If I last that long, LOL)  It's a good job, home by 3pm, but at work at 0600, not to big of a deal for me since I am a morning person.

The kicker is this, since it is a job that is really easy for working mom's, that is all that is there!!  I'm the only employee in the lab without kids, and man, you would have thought I had 9 set of eyes when I declared I don't want kids.    So here I go, with all the personal questions, even the Doc's there think I must have "issues" if I don't want kids.  What century is this????????  

Thanks for the vent, I feel much better now.  Off to go get a cold beer, just got done cleaning the  bathrooms.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Rozzie said:


> Haven't posted in many a moon.  Thought I'd give a little update.  Remember how I was griping about the whole working every holiday thing since we don't have kids?  Well found a new job, in a GI Lab, only have to work every 8th weekend, call once a week, and just one holiday a year, which rotates, since there are 8 full time RN's, if I work Christmas this year, I don't work it again for 8 years.   (If I last that long, LOL)  It's a good job, home by 3pm, but at work at 0600, not to big of a deal for me since I am a morning person.
> 
> The kicker is this, since it is a job that is really easy for working mom's, that is all that is there!!  I'm the only employee in the lab without kids, and man, you would have thought I had 9 set of eyes when I declared I don't want kids.    So here I go, with all the personal questions, even the Doc's there think I must have "issues" if I don't want kids.  What century is this????????
> 
> Thanks for the vent, I feel much better now.  Off to go get a cold beer, just got done cleaning the  bathrooms.




So nice to hear from you again.

Congrats on the new job...sorry about the 9 sets of eyes and the questions...I think they are all jealous of your child free status. I hope you come here more often...


----------



## Rozzie

PhotobearSam said:


> So nice to hear from you again.
> 
> Congrats on the new job...sorry about the 9 sets of eyes and the questions...I think they are all jealous of your child free status. I hope you come here more often...



Hey friend!  I was just going through some Disney albums the other day (homesick) and saw the pics of when we all met up.  Fun day!!!!!


----------



## HockeyKat

Rozzie said:


> Haven't posted in many a moon.  Thought I'd give a little update.  Remember how I was griping about the whole working every holiday thing since we don't have kids?  Well found a new job, in a GI Lab, only have to work every 8th weekend, call once a week, and just one holiday a year, which rotates, since there are 8 full time RN's, if I work Christmas this year, I don't work it again for 8 years.   (If I last that long, LOL)  It's a good job, home by 3pm, but at work at 0600, not to big of a deal for me since I am a morning person.
> 
> The kicker is this, since it is a job that is really easy for working mom's, that is all that is there!!  I'm the only employee in the lab without kids, and man, you would have thought I had 9 set of eyes when I declared I don't want kids.    So here I go, with all the personal questions, even the Doc's there think I must have "issues" if I don't want kids.  What century is this????????
> 
> Thanks for the vent, I feel much better now.  Off to go get a cold beer, just got done cleaning the  bathrooms.



Rozzie!!  Miss you on the other board...    I get the questions all the time, I just tell them they don't want Mr Kat and I's spawn running around and they usually shut up.  

Work has competely kicked my butt this week, so I haven't really been keeping up.   

I gave in tonight (been trying to lose weight) and had Mexican food and beer and man, it feels good.  

I can't add anything to the medication discussion... allergy stuff, birth control (OF COURSE!), and advil are about as far as I go.


----------



## patti_jim_peanut

This makes me think of my husbands family... 
My hubby is 34 and I am 26, we have been married for almost 2 yrs now and they keep asking "Why haven't you guys had any babies yet?".
Umm... let's think about this for a minute, shall we?
I was 20 yrs old when I got pregnant w/ my DD5 and I was a single mother...not what I had planned and totally unexpected, but I wouldn't change a thing as she is the best thing in my life! 

*One* My husband is a very immature man...he may be 34, but he, quite often, acts like he's 14. He can have no patience, a short temper, a serious mean streak and thinks that being terrified of your parents is healthy for a child. I have issues with the latter because I was abused by my parents from the age of 6 to the age of 18 when I joined the Army and lived in constant fear. He grew up pampered and spoiled by his parents who still to this day make excuses for his behavior.He has issues that he needs to work out before we will discuss having additional children. I have told him so, too and he's working on his issues 

*Two* His hours at work have been cut back and we have too much debt to comfortably support a baby. I do not want to bring a baby into our house and then have to worry constantly about affording formula or diapers or buying new clothes for the baby every 3 months! 

*Three* Quite frankly, i'm not sure if I want anymore! I have reached the point with my daughter where she's in school full-time, no diapers to change or potty training. No midnight feeding sessions or cholicy(sp?) fits at 2am. I'm not sure if I want to go through that again... 

The hardest part is being around his family. Mine can understand and appreciate us waiting but his for some reason can't.
What makes it worse is his brother and his wife... they had 2 kids when we got married and since then, they have been pregnant 4 times and had 2 more children. The best part? They are pregnant AGAIN...with twins 

So obviously, everytime there is a family gathering, the pressure is on... "why haven't you guys had a baby yet?" or "so when are we going to be getting this happy news from you two?" or the best one yet "patti, when are you going to give us a grandchild to spoil?"   

And I know that she isn't *biologically* their grandchild, but it steams me that they say that when my daughter has only known my husband as daddy and them as her grammy and grampa. She is their grand-daughter, whether by blood or not! And I don't want to have another child and have them treat it differently than her...cause she will see it and it will hurt her. It happend with me...my dad got married when I was 6 and had 4 more kids...my stepmom always treated me different than them and it hurts.

        

Sorry about dragging on, but it got my dander up!

As for the people who so rudely ask? I like "Why do you ask?" or "Why do you need to know?" Or you could always say "Thats none of your business".


----------



## Rozzie

HockeyKat said:


> Rozzie!!  Miss you on the other board...    I get the questions all the time, I just tell them they don't want Mr Kat and I's spawn running around and they usually shut up.
> 
> .




Hey Kat!! So good to "see" you.  Yep, I really need to get my butt back over to the other board more often.  Sorry work is such a bear. 

patti_jim_peanut----I am really fortunate in the sense our families have all but given up on us having children, and they all "seem" okay with that.  Then again, we have been married for over 10 years now, and they must have all but given up hope.    Sorry things are rough for you, that must be really stressful with family breathing down your neck.


----------



## Hixski

On my side of the family there are just my brother and I. My brother lives at home with my parents and has never left. He has never been married and no kids. I think my parents don't care that we don't have kids since he is the "golden child". He is the one that should have kids. So while it hurts that I'm not the golden child at least nobody was ever breathing down our necks for a grandchild. DH has 16 (I think I counted right) nieces and nephews so his parents didn't really worry about us as far as we know.

We got more grief from other family, friends and strangers than we ever got from our immediate families.


----------



## wdwgypsy

6,661,116,988 on the earth is enough reason for me.  

Better to be the non parent than the parent that ignores what they brought into this world.  Seen that one a few times.  

We have raised 3 girls and raising a 4th now.  Some birth some adoption.  We would raise more if age and money would allow because that is our choice.
Just as it is your choice not to be  parent and I respect that.  If you told me you weren't planning on having children I may seem disappointed but not in you.  There are some things that raising children bring that you can't duplicate with nieces and nephews.  But then again not everyone sky dives either  

Not that you need it but those that decide not to have children have my support.  But you know you can't hide, we know you by your white carpets and light colored funiture


----------



## maddhatir

wdwgypsy said:


> But you know you can't hide, we know you by your white carpets and light colored funiture



 You know- the first house DH and I owned in 1987- we had off white sofas and 2 off white ottomans. 

We never went into the "sitting room" where they were. One Thanksgiving we had the family over. Well, add 3 kids to the house and by the end of the evening the sofas had marks on them!


----------



## Suzibrat

Good Morning everyone!
I have alot to catch up on here..you all have been busy over the weekend and I see new faces here too!  
DH has a Dr appointment today and hopefully he will be released back to work. He's more than ready to go back, I know that! (And I'm more than ready to have him go back!!)
I'll try to get back in here later today to catch up with everyone. In the meantime have a good day!


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Whoa, Suzi, you were on bright and early!! 

I was down a computer this weekend.  We finally moved into the computer room (and moved things around) to get that put in order after moving in.  The dad visit that didn't happen kind of got us in gear again.  When we first moved in we worked, worked, worked just to get the bathroom refinished.  It was work overload.  Then, when that was done we didn't feel like doing anymore. Lazy, lazy, lazy I know.

So, with summer coming and the prospect of visitors we thought, we better get cracking!  I could have used today off as well but DH wouldn't go for it and, well, you know how silly I am about using my days.    Besides, it's really better w/ DH there because he helps me to get rid of things.  

Otherwise, sometimes I pack rat it.


----------



## Suzibrat

I actually slept in this morning  DH goes back to work tomorrow  That means I will be back to getting up between 5 and 5:30am, which I love. He's so happy about finally being able to go back that he's in a silly mood. I have to say that other than the TV being on as loud as it can go (he doesn't hear very well) he's really been no trouble and I'm going to miss having him here all day. 
I just got home from running around. I had to mail a package to the UK and it cost $20 for a 2 pound package!! The person I'm sending it to is totally worth it though and I wanted her to have some Yankee Candles for her birthday. They have the yummiest scents! One of them that I sent her was "Fudge Ripple". I made sure I got one of those babies for myself. 
I'm off to do some housework, make a pork roast and then relax with my man all night. Hope you all are having a great Monday! We haven't heard from Barthy so he must be holed up in the Sports Bar!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

Suzibrat said:


> .
> I just got home from running around. I had to mail a package to the UK and it cost $20 for a 2 pound package!! The person I'm sending it to is totally worth it though and I wanted her to have some Yankee Candles for her birthday. They have the yummiest scents! One of them that I sent her was "Fudge Ripple". I made sure I got one of those babies for myself.
> I'm off to do some housework, make a pork roast and then relax with my man all night. Hope you all are having a great Monday! We haven't heard from Barthy so he must be holed up in the Sports Bar!



ok I am going to have to find that scent! Sounds yummy! I am hugely addicted to Yankee Candles!!


----------



## HockeyKat

maddhatir said:


> You know- the first house DH and I owned in 1987- we had off white sofas and 2 off white ottomans.
> 
> We never went into the "sitting room" where they were. One Thanksgiving we had the family over. Well, add 3 kids to the house and by the end of the evening the sofas had marks on them!




We have a white/cream sofa... and two white/cream chaise lounges... and white carpeting...  and a white cat... 

Mr Kat, even if we already didn't want them, is way too OCD to foist on a poor defenseless child.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Suzibrat said:


> I just got home from running around. I had to mail a package to the UK and it cost $20 for a 2 pound package!! The person I'm sending it to is totally worth it though and I wanted her to have some Yankee Candles for her birthday. They have the yummiest scents! One of them that I sent her was "Fudge Ripple". I made sure I got one of those babies for myself.



Our favorites are Home Sweet Home & Vineyard! 
MMmmmmmmm!!!!

We live 45 minutes from the big flagship store in Deerfield, MA   
I still remember it before the family that owned it sold the place.  Back when they had the car museum (it was a good spot to leave your DH while you shop!).  It is still nice...but not as nice as it used to be.
I will say you can get some great deals & do some serious damage when shopping there.


----------



## Suzibrat

Shyvioletisme said:


> ok I am going to have to find that scent! Sounds yummy! I am hugely addicted to Yankee Candles!!


 


zima-cheryl said:


> Our favorites are Home Sweet Home & Vineyard!
> MMmmmmmmm!!!!
> 
> We live 45 minutes from the big flagship store in Deerfield, MA
> I still remember it before the family that owned it sold the place. Back when they had the car museum (it was a good spot to leave your DH while you shop!). It is still nice...but not as nice as it used to be.
> I will say you can get some great deals & do some serious damage when shopping there.


The Root Beer Float smells pretty good too! Right now I am burning Sun & Sand. I love these candles and they last so long! When I go thru Mass. on my way home from NY I always stop in the town that has the second hand Yankee Candle shop. It's right next to a free standing YC. I can't remember the name of the town for the life of me ( and too lazy to google it) but I think it's something like Shelburne??? I know they have a huge Antique fair thingie every year.  One year they had the large jar "French Toast" candles for $9.95 just because the label was a little crooked! I'll be going there in a few weeks and plan on stocking up a bit!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Suzibrat said:


> The Root Beer Float smells pretty good too! Right now I am burning Sun & Sand. I love these candles and they last so long! When I go thru Mass. on my way home from NY I always stop in the town that has the second hand Yankee Candle shop. It's right next to a free standing YC. I can't remember the name of the town for the life of me ( and too lazy to google it) but I think it's something like Shelburne??? I know they have a huge Antique fair thingie every year.  One year they had the large jar "French Toast" candles for $9.95 just because the label was a little crooked! I'll be going there in a few weeks and plan on stocking up a bit!



Shelburne Falls, that is a nice area!  They have the Bridge of Flowers during the summer that is just amazing to see!  

You do have to love the seconds.  I don't mind crooked lables or bubbles or slightly off or swirlly colors as long as the candle smells yummy!  The Macintosh Apple candle is amazingly dead on!  Makes me hungry when I smell that one. 

Different topic... it is the best time of the year (at least if you are a hockey fan)!!!  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPW-uTKRFdc

DH's Bruins won one last night so at least Montreal won't sweep them out in Round 1.   
My Thrashers didn't even make the playoffs...they are all off golfing now.
   Maybe next year.  
Of course I don't know who to cheer for now?


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Different topic... it is the best time of the year (at least if you are a hockey fan)!!!
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPW-uTKRFdc
> 
> DH's Bruins won one last night so at least Montreal won't sweep them out in Round 1.
> My Thrashers didn't even make the playoffs...they are all off golfing now.
> Maybe next year.
> Of course I don't know who to cheer for now?



Playoff time!!! 

That clip must have been old- it had our own Eric Lindros in a Flyer's Jersey!

But the clip had it all- hockey and James from METALLICA!!!!!


----------



## Hixski

You know I try not to let what posters say bug me but this thread just struck me wrong. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1793063

We have had people question us about why do we have a 3bd-2bath house if we don't have children before. It just struck me wrong that she is somewhat complaining about yet another couple without children moving into her neighborhood. Makes me wonder how many of our neighbors back in the day (we have been here 20yrs) gave us the stink eye because we didn't produce playmates for their children. 

Is it just me or did that come across rude to any of you??? Or am I just being crabby today??


----------



## zima-cheryl

Hixski said:


> You know I try not to let what posters say bug me but this thread just struck me wrong. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1793063
> 
> We have had people question us about why do we have a 3bd-2bath house if we don't have children before. It just struck me wrong that she is somewhat complaining about yet another couple without children moving into her neighborhood. Makes me wonder how many of our neighbors back in the day (we have been here 20yrs) gave us the stink eye because we didn't produce playmates for their children.
> 
> Is it just me or did that come across rude to any of you??? Or am I just being crabby today??



No -I don't think you are being crabby....
I just don't get it?     She just assumed the neighbors would always have kids the same age as hers?  To me hers is a pretty narrow minded & selfish sounding post.  I hope it just came out poorly & that she really didn't mean it the way it sounds.  

Personally I love our immediate neighbors - one older, retired lady who "keeps an eye on the neighbor hood"   on one side & the couple on the other side have 2 nice girls 1 in college & the other a senior in High School.  
The couple accross the street have a toddler...but they seem nice enough.  I'm sure being across the street means we don't hear the screaming & tantrums like their immediate neighbors probably do.


----------



## Devil_Dog99

Hixski said:


> You know I try not to let what posters say bug me but this thread just struck me wrong. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1793063
> 
> We have had people question us about why do we have a 3bd-2bath house if we don't have children before. It just struck me wrong that she is somewhat complaining about yet another couple without children moving into her neighborhood. Makes me wonder how many of our neighbors back in the day (we have been here 20yrs) gave us the stink eye because we didn't produce playmates for their children.
> 
> Is it just me or did that come across rude to any of you??? Or am I just being crabby today??



I read that post and     DW and I must have ruined our neighborhood when we moved in almost 15 years ago. Our neighborhood has plenty of kids and we just didnt add to the population. If her point is lamenting days gone by when kids were more plentiful (and there was an allusion) then I can almost see the logic. But teh way that post came across made it seem like it is the new neighbor's responsibility to provide playmates - and that is just wrong!!! I started to leave a reply but stopped - couldnt really come up with anything nice to say - too


----------



## Devil_Dog99

Couldn't help myself - left a post - tried to be as nice as I could - hope my fellow no-kidders will lend me some flame proof materials.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Only one neighbour here has kids...I love it.

I just hated the way it came across...Not nice. 

I am always excited when people with no kids move around here as we could use people who think like us to talk to...


----------



## patti_jim_peanut

I was shocked at her attitude about the couple moving in. The aren't even married So what? I've seen unmarried couples last longer than married ones and you're income doesn't get a magical boost once you get married And how can they afford it What? Does not being married mean you're poor? Or does being married mean you're well off enough to buy a house?

$230,000 is average for a house around here as well and I don't know about her, but we've got a married couple living by us and their son is in the same class as my DD... we won't let her anywhere near him!! Him and his big brother are plain old evil!!


----------



## Hixski

Well, I'm glad to know it wasn't just me that it struck wrong. I grew up in a neighborhood too that had tons of kids. Heck, the family across the street had 11 kids (10 girls and 1 boy ). I just hope that poster doesn't treat the new neighbors with a "Well, you aren't married and you don't have children for my children to play with so what the heck are you doing in the neighborhood attitude". I would like to think people wouldn't do that but you never know in this day and age.


----------



## Andy B

This is your choice and great for that, however I would say that my children are the greatest joy of my life, true they don't come without challenges but luckily our have all been small ones.

With regard to your answers to questions I feel the our dogs are our family allways sounds strange and is in fact a substitution for children and so could lead to more questions. Also the thypew of answer indicating that we want to spend all our disposable income and spare time on us does sound a little selfish, I'm sure it's not meant that way but to me it does.

If you are happy then I do not see why you should let this bug you but do not assume you know how you would feel with children, my wife was not particually interested in babies and still does not traditionally 'coo' over others but she is a wonderful mother to ours.


----------



## Suzibrat

Hixski said:


> You know I try not to let what posters say bug me but this thread just struck me wrong. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1793063
> 
> Is it just me or did that come across rude to any of you??? Or am I just being crabby today??


Naw, you weren't being crabby. I was thrown off track by it as well. But I guess that when people are used to having neighborhoods full of kids they get used to it that way and want it to stay the same. The house across the street from me just was sold and my neighbor and I were praying it was a headbanger with long hair and tattoos  (not that she's into metal music, she just likes the way the guys look ) My husband was praying that *no one* like that would move in! I think he had visions of finding a party on our deck everday when he got home from work.  No such luck, it's a family who is from out of state (like I was) so right now they are probably suffering from shell shock because they realized they have stepped back in time to Mayberry. Hope they don't meet Andy Griffith and Barney Fife too soon or they'll put the house back up for sale! (Ohhh the story I could tell about my run in with Barney Fife!)



Andy B said:


> This is your choice and great for that, however I would say that my children are the greatest joy of my life, true they don't come without challenges but luckily our have all been small ones.
> 
> With regard to your answers to questions I feel the our dogs are our family allways sounds strange and is in fact a substitution for children and so could lead to more questions. Also the thypew of answer indicating that we want to spend all our disposable income and spare time on us does sound a little selfish, I'm sure it's not meant that way but to me it does.
> 
> If you are happy then I do not see why you should let this bug you but do not assume you know how you would feel with children, my wife was not particually interested in babies and still does not traditionally 'coo' over others but she is a wonderful mother to ours.


*Huh?????* 

I've been up since 2:30 this morning. Couldn't sleep for some reason and started searching for "pay as you go" cell phones online. The wall I keep hitting is that there is not a bit of cell phone coverage here! I want to use it mainly when I travel. I have 3 trips coming up and since I will be doing them alone I like to have a phone with me just in case. My tracfone hasn't been able to hit a tower anywhere around and won't even go into roaming mode so I'm ready to ditch it! 
My car was finally dragged (and i do mean dragged, because the back brakes were locked) up onto a hauler and taken to be fixed. When I screw up a car I do it in fine fashion...it needs a new motor. Oh yeah, and all new brakes in the back as well (imagine that!) I will get it back in about a week and I can't wait! Then I have to have a new set of speakers put in. Somehow the rear speakers got blown. How ever did that happen?????
Hope you all have a good day. It's a beauty here!


----------



## Andy B

Suzibrat said:


> Naw, you weren't being crabby. I was thrown off track by it as well. But I guess that when people are used to having neighborhoods full of kids they get used to it that way and want it to stay the same. The house across the street from me just was sold and my neighbor and I were praying it was a headbanger with long hair and tattoos  (not that she's into metal music, she just likes the way the guys look ) My husband was praying that *no one* like that would move in! I think he had visions of finding a party on our deck everday when he got home from work.  No such luck, it's a family who is from out of state (like I was) so right now they are probably suffering from shell shock because they realized they have stepped back in time to Mayberry. Hope they don't meet Andy Griffith and Barney Fife too soon or they'll put the house back up for sale! (Ohhh the story I could tell about my run in with Barney Fife!)
> 
> *Huh?????*
> 
> I've been up since 2:30 this morning. Couldn't sleep for some reason and started searching for "pay as you go" cell phones online. The wall I keep hitting is that there is not a bit of cell phone coverage here! I want to use it mainly when I travel. I have 3 trips coming up and since I will be doing them alone I like to have a phone with me just in case. My tracfone hasn't been able to hit a tower anywhere around and won't even go into roaming mode so I'm ready to ditch it!
> My car was finally dragged (and i do mean dragged, because the back brakes were locked) up onto a hauler and taken to be fixed. When I screw up a car I do it in fine fashion...it needs a new motor. Oh yeah, and all new brakes in the back as well (imagine that!) I will get it back in about a week and I can't wait! Then I have to have a new set of speakers put in. Somehow the rear speakers got blown. How ever did that happen?????
> Hope you all have a good day. It's a beauty here!



Why the HUH! I was replying to the original post subject.


----------



## Suzibrat

Andy B said:


> Why the HUH! I was replying to the original post subject.


THe OP was from September of 2005, that's why I was confused....I couldn't figure out who you were responding to that had posted on here lately. That's why the "Huh"????  I haven't had enough java this morning yet I guess.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Suzibrat said:


> ...and started searching for "pay as you go" cell phones online...



You might want to check out Virgin Mobile (http://www.virginmobileusa.com).
Virgin Mobile is the same as the Virgin Airlines company... odd combo I know, but at least it is a known, reliable company. 

I believe they piggy back on the Sprint towers (I could be "misremembering" that but it is one of the other major carriers they piggy back on).  In the US we've always had good coverage.  

We have the cheapest option they offer - we add $15 every 3 months (it ends up being $15.75 w/tax).  Per minute it is a bit high compared to other plans, but if you are like DH & I you'll never use it all.  We both have over $100 balance on our phones right now.  
Downside is you buy your phone...unlike getting it for free when you sign on for some of those 2+ year plans from the other companies.  However, I still think over the years we have come out way ahead compared to paying the monthly service plan amount to Sprint, AT&T or Verizon.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Devil_Dog99 said:


> Couldn't help myself - left a post - tried to be as nice as I could - hope my fellow no-kidders will lend me some flame proof materials.



I tried to avoid it....but I left a post too.  
Not so much for me... but what ticked me off was the comments about older couples & empty nesters.  My grandparents didn't own their first home until after all the kids were grown & gone.  The folks on their street were lucky to have them as neighbors!!!!  (OK maybe I'm a bit biased.. but they really were good folks   )

It really sounds like age discrimination...  
well you are too old - just go to the nursing home...you waited too long so you can't own your own home now!


----------



## quadmonkey

Hi All!!

Just wanted to drop in and say that my wife and I are also not planning on having kids!    

I also get to take my wife to Disney World for her first time this Sept!!


----------



## maddhatir

quadmonkey said:


> Hi All!!
> 
> Just wanted to drop in and say that my wife and I are also not planning on having kids!
> 
> I also get to take my wife to Disney World for her first time this Sept!!



Welcome!
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




And Sept is an awesome time to go- a little hot- but all the kiddies are back to school- low crowds!


----------



## quadmonkey

Thanks for the welcome.

And avoiding the crowds is what we're shooting for!  We'll be there for the whole week, and camping in our 5th wheel at Fort Wilderness.


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> THe OP was from September of 2005, that's why I was confused....I couldn't figure out who you were responding to that had posted on here lately. That's why the "Huh"????  I haven't had enough java this morning yet I guess.



 Don't worry Suz- It is 4:15- I have already had my java a long time ago- and I was still confused. 

I had to read the post a few times- ya, know I still may be confused, but that's OK I am off work until Monday!


----------



## maddhatir

quadmonkey said:


> Thanks for the welcome.
> 
> And avoiding the crowds is what we're shooting for!  We'll be there for the whole week, and camping in our 5th wheel at Fort Wilderness.



OK- what's a 5th wheel- is THAT camper lingo! - boy- I am really confused today!


----------



## quadmonkey

maddhatir said:


> OK- what's a 5th wheel- is THAT camper lingo! - boy- I am really confused today!



Yep, it's a certain type of camper, that's pulled behind a truck.  The kind where the hitch is in the bed of the truck.


----------



## maddhatir

quadmonkey said:


> Yep, it's a certain type of camper, that's pulled behind a truck.  The kind where the hitch is in the bed of the truck.



Cool. I would like to have a big camper that you drive, but I do not like to camp and I don't like bugs.....and my camper would have to have a shower...and air conditioning b/c I do not like to sweat..... 

Imagine me at Fort Wilderness
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I would be an embarrassment


----------



## Shyvioletisme

quadmonkey said:


> Hi All!!
> 
> Just wanted to drop in and say that my wife and I are also not planning on having kids!
> 
> I also get to take my wife to Disney World for her first time this Sept!!




welcome!!! How cool that you get to help your wife experience WDW for the first time!!


----------



## Suzibrat

zima-cheryl said:


> You might want to check out Virgin Mobile (http://www.virginmobileusa.com).
> Virgin Mobile is the same as the Virgin Airlines company... odd combo I know, but at least it is a known, reliable company.
> 
> I believe they piggy back on the Sprint towers (I could be "misremembering" that but it is one of the other major carriers they piggy back on). In the US we've always had good coverage.
> 
> We have the cheapest option they offer - we add $15 every 3 months (it ends up being $15.75 w/tax). Per minute it is a bit high compared to other plans, but if you are like DH & I you'll never use it all. We both have over $100 balance on our phones right now.
> Downside is you buy your phone...unlike getting it for free when you sign on for some of those 2+ year plans from the other companies. However, I still think over the years we have come out way ahead compared to paying the monthly service plan amount to Sprint, AT&T or Verizon.


 
Thank you for the info!! I will look into it!



quadmonkey said:


> Hi All!!
> 
> Just wanted to drop in and say that my wife and I are also not planning on having kids!
> 
> I also get to take my wife to Disney World for her first time this Sept!!


Welcome quadmonkey! We're going to Disney in September too! If I survive the summer festivities!  



maddhatir said:


> Don't worry Suz- It is 4:15- I have already had my java a long time ago- and I was still confused.
> 
> I had to read the post a few times- ya, know I still may be confused, but that's OK I am off work until Monday!


Glad I wasn't the only one.  off work until Monday? No fair! What on earth could you need time off for? It's not like you have kids or anything!


----------



## quadmonkey

Maddhatir

Most 5th wheels, Travel Trailers have AC, Full bathrooms, pretty much the same stuff as a house except more compact.

Ours is actually considered a 2nd house and we can write of the interest on the loan.


Suzibrat

Thank you for the welcome


----------



## maddhatir

quadmonkey said:


> Maddhatir
> 
> Most 5th wheels, Travel Trailers have AC, Full bathrooms, pretty much the same stuff as a house except more compact.
> 
> Ours is actually considered a 2nd house and we can write of the interest on the loan.



I keep trying to tell my husband to get one of the big ones so we can live in it and travel all over the US. I would love to sell my house, and just go- we can work odd jobs in different places - I think that would be so cool! So much freedom!

But he says....no.  

Have you ever stay at Fort Wilderness- have you visited the FW/Camping forum on the DIS?? I hear the campfires and the movies are pretty cool!


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> Glad I wasn't the only one.  off work until Monday? No fair! What on earth could you need time off for? It's not like you have kids or anything!



I have 5 more vacation days to use until my year is up in May- My boss would probably let me carry them over- but it is supposed to beautiful the next few days- so I am taking full advantage of my days!

And I have 2 more days left- so I am taking Monday and Tuesday off the week of the 28th.  

I used another day yesterday- to go to the dentist- yuk. Good thing I did I took 2 ativan before my appt (that was 7:30am) by 2pm I was dead tired and I fell asleep until 6pm


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> My car was finally dragged (and i do mean dragged, because the back brakes were locked) up onto a hauler and taken to be fixed. When I screw up a car I do it in fine fashion...it needs a new motor. Oh yeah, and all new brakes in the back as well (imagine that!) I will get it back in about a week and I can't wait! Then I have to have a new set of speakers put in. Somehow the rear speakers got blown. How ever did that happen?????
> Hope you all have a good day. It's a beauty here!



I am lucky- DH is a mechanic. He will not let my car die! Usually when I hear a noise, I say- I want a new car- but he chimes in and says- he can fix it, and always does  

Funny you mention speakers. I was at SILs house last night. DH ratted my nephew out (not her son- it is also her nephew) that he races with her car when he borrows it (she has a Lexus and he is 20- go figure!) and he also blew out her back speakers- listening to ...rap....bleck, poor kid 

anyway- on the way home last night I said to DH- "oooo- I got the new Cavalera Conspiracy CD and I want to CRANK UP "Inflikted" ...he just looked at me and said. "don't blow out your speakers"


----------



## Hixski

My speakers are starting to sound a bit crackly on my car. They are Bose speakers but they are 9 yrs old. I noticed it when I cranked it up on Metallica's "Enter Sandman". DH and I both like Metallica. That is about as heavy as our metal gets. But boy I sure could tell that I may need new speakers in the near future. Since my car is 9 yrs old, I may just get a whole new car if the speakers do go out.

Welcome quadmonkey!!!


----------



## zima-cheryl

quadmonkey said:


> Hi All!!
> 
> Just wanted to drop in and say that my wife and I are also not planning on having kids!
> 
> I also get to take my wife to Disney World for her first time this Sept!!



Welcome   

Sept. is a great time to go!   
You should check out the free dining being offered... I think through 9/20.


----------



## shazy03

quadmonkey said:


> Hi All!!
> 
> Just wanted to drop in and say that my wife and I are also not planning on having kids!
> 
> I also get to take my wife to Disney World for her first time this Sept!!



Good choice on the planning stick to pets instead 

We have always enjoyed September have a great time


----------



## Suzibrat

Hixski said:


> My speakers are starting to sound a bit crackly on my car. They are Bose speakers but they are 9 yrs old. I noticed it when I cranked it up on Metallica's "Enter Sandman". DH and I both like Metallica. That is about as heavy as our metal gets. But boy I sure could tell that I may need new speakers in the near future. Since my car is 9 yrs old, I may just get a whole new car if the speakers do go out.
> 
> Welcome quadmonkey!!!


 
Hixski, for playing Metallica and honoring the Queens of Metal Darkness I say you deserve a brand new fancy schmancy car! 

 The best money can buy! (Of course I won't be the one making the payments!  )



shazy03 said:


> Good choice on the planning stick to pets instead
> 
> We have always enjoyed September have a great time


 
Hey Shazy! Nice to see you here with us! Love your bunnies!!!

Another early morning for me. I can't seem to sleep any later than 4:30 anymore. I really don't mind. I like watching the sun come up. 
How hot will Disney be at the end of September? The last time I went was in December and it was perfect, coming from the cold east coast, but my neighbor said we are "going to die" going the last week of September/first week of October. Should I be making out my will at this point? 


Hope you all


----------



## zima-cheryl

Suzibrat said:


> ... How hot will Disney be at the end of September? The last time I went was in December and it was perfect, coming from the cold east coast, but my neighbor said we are "going to die" going the last week of September/first week of October. Should I be making out my will at this point?



We've been in later Sept. several times - take shorts & light shirts.  At night you may want jeans.  It is comparable to July in New England I would say.  We have never had a problem that time of year.

Of course I'm a "summer baby" the hotter the better in my opinion.


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> How hot will Disney be at the end of September? The last time I went was in December and it was perfect, coming from the cold east coast, but my neighbor said we are "going to die" going the last week of September/first week of October. Should I be making out my will at this point?
> 
> 
> Hope you all



It's not THAT bad!!! We went Sept 16-24 in 2006- sure it was hot- but not THAT hot- We only had one day that it rained- I mean, poured- it started in the early evening and went on into the night- but that was no big deal.

We just went to the pool in the afternoon and the evenings were fine. Not sure if you will like this- but I DID think it was too hot to drink during the day- even at the pool! Just save it for the evenings. 

Now ME! on the other hand- we are going the last week in August- everyone is saying how hot it will be- .........not sure how different it will be from Jersey- 100% humidity and 100 degrees here once in a while in the summer!

Who cares....we will be in Disney!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> It's not THAT bad!!! We went Sept 16-24 in 2006- sure it was hot- but not THAT hot- We only had one day that it rained- I mean, poured- it started in the early evening and went on into the night- but that was no big deal.
> 
> We just went to the pool in the afternoon and the evenings were fine. Not sure if you will like this- but I DID think it was too hot to drink during the day- even at the pool! Just save it for the evenings.
> 
> Now ME! on the other hand- we are going the last week in August- everyone is saying how hot it will be- .........not sure how different it will be from Jersey- 100% humidity and 100 degrees here once in a while in the summer!
> 
> Who cares....we will be in Disney!



August can get warm.  A couple years ago when we went in early August it was high 90's each day and 70's at night.  Just dress light - shorts, tank tops, light colors.  And yes you s/stick to drinking water during the day (although I might make an exception on the alcohol for a Grey Goose slushie in France!!!)   


One trick is to take a wide-mouth water bottle w/you & fill it w/ice @ the hotel in the morning.  As it melts during the day you have cold ice water to drink & keep you cool.  Also lots & lots of ice cream!!!   

During the middle of the afternoon hit something cool w/AC - Pirates, Fantasmic, etc.  Where you can sit & cool off.  And the pool mid-day is a good idea too.  

It certainly is bearable as long as you don't go crazy & over do it.


----------



## Hixski

zima-cheryl said:


> August can get warm.  A couple years ago when we went in early August it was high 90's each day and 70's at night.  Just dress light - shorts, tank tops, light colors.  And yes you s/stick to drinking water during the day (although I might make an exception on the alcohol for a Grey Goose slushie in France!!!)
> 
> 
> *One trick is to take a wide-mouth water bottle w/you & fill it w/ice @ the hotel in the morning.  As it melts during the day you have cold ice water to drink & keep you cool.  Also lots & lots of ice cream!!!  *
> 
> During the middle of the afternoon hit something cool w/AC - Pirates, Fantasmic, etc.  Where you can sit & cool off.  And the pool mid-day is a good idea too.
> 
> It certainly is bearable as long as you don't go crazy & over do it.



Just don't fill up those bottles at a drinking fountain. People use those for things other than drinking. This is probably TMI but a drinking fountain is NOT a baby bidet!!!???  Nuff said!! 

We love to go in September too!! Next time though we are going to go at the end of Sept/early Oct in order to hit the Food and Wine Festival. We have never done that yet and I know we would love it!!


----------



## HockeyKat

We have done first and last week of Sept.   First week was definitely hot.   The last week was also very warm.   Shorts and tanks and much pool and water park time, for sure.

And, I live in NC, so I know what hot is!      We have also done January twice, and I honestly prefer the heat to the cold at WDW.   I like being able to hit the pool.

We are thinking of maybe doing the first week in Nov... on the DVC wait list at the moment.   We are also doing May 17-23 (which is coming up quick!).   For some reason I didn't realize that May 26th was Labor Day, so I am not too sure what the crowd levels will be like.  Oh well, we are at BCV so if they are too bad we will just camp by the pool w/ a few.


----------



## ForTheLoveofDisney

Hixski said:


> Just don't fill up those bottles at a drinking fountain. People use those for things other than drinking. This is probably TMI but *a drinking fountain is NOT a baby bidet!!!???*  Nuff said!!
> 
> We love to go in September too!! Next time though we are going to go at the end of Sept/early Oct in order to hit the Food and Wine Festival. We have never done that yet and I know we would love it!!

















 That is just disgusting!!

Here's a little tip I learned over on the budget board, you can go to any counter service establishment and ask for a cup of ice water.  It's free and you don't have to use the baby bidet to fill up your water bottle.

We've been in September before and I actually liked it.  I've been in November, December, February, May, June, August and September and honestly, I think September is my favorite timeframe.  Hardly ANY kids at all and it's nice and warm.  Course, like a Zima-Cheryl said, "the hotter the better in my opinion".  My opinion too.


----------



## Hixski

Sooooo, I am sitting at work and the whole room starts shaking. I am in the data center which is on a raised floor. My chair is actually bouncing. I haven't felt one in years but there it was. An earthquake!! 5.4 to be exact, centered in Illinois about 120 miles from us. Now we are used to the tornadoes but the earthquakes are a bit different. This one wasn't even on the New Madrid fault line. If that one ever goes St. Louis and Memphis will probably go with it.


----------



## Barthy73

Hixski said:


> An earthquake!! 5.4 to be exact, centered in Illinois about 120 miles from us.



I'm jealous!  I want to experience an earthquake!


----------



## Hixski

Barthy73 said:


> I'm jealous!  I want to experience an earthquake!



Honestly, it wasn't that exciting. It kind of feels like you are sitting in your car on an overpass and a big truck goes by and the overpass feels like it is shaking and bouncing.


----------



## maddhatir

HockeyKat said:


> We are thinking of maybe doing the first week in Nov... on the DVC wait list at the moment.   We are also doing May 17-23 (which is coming up quick!).   For some reason I didn't realize that May 26th was Labor Day, so I am not too sure what the crowd levels will be like.  Oh well, we are at BCV so if they are too bad we will just camp by the pool w/ a few.




oooo- be careful- isn't the first week in Nov- Jersey week??? I hear it is Crowd-DED!


----------



## Barthy73

On Touring Plans, Jersey "week" is listed for 11/6-11/8, and the crowd calendar appropriately shows "8" as the crowd level.  Earlier in the week, crowds are mostly listed as 6-7.  I've visited during this time, and it's been nice.  Epcot has Food and Wine Festival, but as we visited on a Thursday, the park wa practically empty.  We went to Magic Kingdom the next day, and even though crowd calendar showed it'd be less busy, it was pretty crazy.  

We're looking to visit sometime in late October (19th-26th maybe), but nothing has been booked yet.


----------



## TDISFAMILY

Krissalee said:


> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!



I just wanted to say even if you where to decide to have 1 child the questions wouldn't stop there they would ask when are your going to have another?DH and I have 1 DS3 and are perfectly happy just the 3 of us I do not want any more children. Believe me I have a list of reasons I give them for not wanting more but they do not give up. Just wanted to let you know I feel your pain even with one child the same questions get very old answering them on a weekly basis.


----------



## Rozzie

HockeyKat said:


> We are thinking of maybe doing the first week in Nov... on the DVC wait list at the moment.   We are also doing May 17-23 (which is coming up quick!).   For some reason I didn't realize that May 26th was Labor Day, so I am not too sure what the crowd levels will be like.  Oh well, we are at BCV so if they are too bad we will just camp by the pool w/ a few.



Hey, we'll be there till' the 2nd, maybe we could have a "last man standing" contest with some F&W tastings.     Good luck on the waitlist!  How long you been on?  I know BWV had quite a few 1BR's Pref when I booked at 7 months last month, I bet things will open up for you. 

To the question of Jersey Week, I've done it twice, and really it wasn't terrible.  But we  do get to the parks early and head out when the droves come in though.  I actually like Jersey Week, as my favorite New Jerseyian says on another board, everyone drinks a lot and walks fast!!  

I kinda "grew up" at FW, lived in Orlando as a kid, dad traveled all the time and my mom would load us up in the pop up and just kinda hang out all week for something to do.  Went back to FW last October with my dad/stepmom and his RV and now been daydreaming of buying a 5th Wheel.  I could do travel nursing maybe, and DH could, well, mmm, I'll have to get back to that.  His job ain't a travel job for sure.   Anyhoo, FW was a blast, itching to go again sometime.  Gosh, we could have stayed all week just at the Fort without entering into a park.


----------



## maddhatir

Rozzie said:


> I actually like Jersey Week, as my favorite New Jerseyian says on another board, everyone drinks a lot and walks fast!!



  I just read this and started cracking up b/c everytime I am out just running errands etc here at home (in Jersey!)- I always say- "WHERE THE HECK IS EVERYONE GOING IN SUCH A HURRY!" 

Though, I rarley find myself saying- where the heck is everyone going- drunk and in a hurry


----------



## HockeyKat

Rozzie said:


> Hey, we'll be there till' the 2nd, maybe we could have a "last man standing" contest with some F&W tastings.     Good luck on the waitlist!  How long you been on?  I know BWV had quite a few 1BR's Pref when I booked at 7 months last month, I bet things will open up for you.
> 
> To the question of Jersey Week, I've done it twice, and really it wasn't terrible.  But we  do get to the parks early and head out when the droves come in though.  I actually like Jersey Week, as my favorite New Jerseyian says on another board, everyone drinks a lot and walks fast!!
> 
> I kinda "grew up" at FW, lived in Orlando as a kid, dad traveled all the time and my mom would load us up in the pop up and just kinda hang out all week for something to do.  Went back to FW last October with my dad/stepmom and his RV and now been daydreaming of buying a 5th Wheel.  I could do travel nursing maybe, and DH could, well, mmm, I'll have to get back to that.  His job ain't a travel job for sure.   Anyhoo, FW was a blast, itching to go again sometime.  Gosh, we could have stayed all week just at the Fort without entering into a park.




We are sort of flexible on dates... were just thinking the first week in Nov because we have been the last week in Oct and thought it was crowded.

The other option would have been to do the week that started the 9th, and come on Friday to get in the last bit of F&W.   There was TONS of availability that week, and maybe we would enjoy that more, we hate crowds... 

Thanks for the heads up!!


----------



## Suzibrat

Good Morning everyone! Did you all catch the screw up on here last night? Twas a riot! The illustrious minds that run this site were sending us right over to the dark side!  Honestly, it was childish and petty but it shows the mentality of the people that run this site. I was up half the night watching the fun and now I'm pooped. Heaven forbid you shouldn't agree with all the pixie dust blowing that goes around on here and *poof* you are gone! Yeah, the whole thing pisses me off because it's like you have to walk on egg shells around here, afraid to say the wrong thing. I'd actually like to see the people from the dark side be able to post here-would liven up the place and be a welcome change from the pudding vents, and crap that we see on the CB...oh yeah, I'm in a bad mood today. lol


----------



## patti_jim_peanut

Suzibrat said:


> Good Morning everyone! Did you all catch the screw up on here last night? Twas a riot! The illustrious minds that run this site were sending us right over to the dark side!  Honestly, it was childish and petty but it shows the mentality of the people that run this site. I was up half the night watching the fun and now I'm pooped. Heaven forbid you shouldn't agree with all the pixie dust blowing that goes around on here and *poof* you are gone! Yeah, the whole thing pisses me off because it's like you have to walk on egg shells around here, afraid to say the wrong thing. I'd actually like to see the people from the dark side be able to post here-would liven up the place and be a welcome change from the pudding vents, and crap that we see on the CB...oh yeah, I'm in a bad mood today. lol



What happened? 

I went to bed early last night, trying to get caught up on my sleep for DISNEY!!! 2 days!!

I have noticed that you do have to be careful of what you say. I started a thread making light of all peeves DISNEY, and people were having fun with it when all of a sudden this mod comes out of nowhere and says "that's it for this one" and closes it...   

It wasn't even bad...someone started with turn down service and we went on to elaborate that a bedtime story and glass of warm milk would be nice before they tuck us in.  

Then someone else said:
"To truly get people riled up, you have to be more specific, like I tipped 25% while nursing my baby at the table of the restaurant that I had chosen out of the 6 dinner ADRs I had made so I could have my pick and sharing my buffet meal with a child who got in free because I lied about their age while character hogging and I ran my double stroller that I did not pay for, I just took from a ride and ran into 66 ankles on the way here. Did I leave anything out?"

To which I replied: 
"Don't forget that you pulled your kids out of school for the trip and they have *gasp* unexcused absences!!! and that you brought your resort mugs from last year! 

And some of those peeves were mine so noone can say that I was singling out anyone...


----------



## Suzibrat

I think that was hilarious! It's amazing you didn't get a slap on the hand for it in some way....cuz we all know things are perfect at Disney and nothing like that could ever happen  
The webmaster's little attempt to control the dark side bit him right in the butt and I think it was funny as hell.


----------



## WDWguru

What happened?! I missed it!


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> I think that was hilarious! It's amazing you didn't get a slap on the hand for it in some way....cuz we all know things are perfect at Disney and nothing like that could ever happen
> The webmaster's little attempt to control the dark side bit him right in the butt and I think it was funny as hell.



I know for a few days- you could not link from there to here- here to there wherever- Not sure what I missed last night. Where the heck was I??-  

I know I was in the house ...........oh yeah- We were catching up on our missed Bill Maher episodes- he is so darn funny- I said to DH- WHY- every night, on the nightly news- can't it be mandatory for them to just run one of his quick thoughts ponder- make all the one track mind, pea brains of this country open their eyes to what is going on besides what is in their own little one track pathetic "me-me me" worlds! 

OMG- Suz- sounds like I am in one of those moods too!

I am just so sick of people not having a freaking clue! People are just a bunch of brainwashed, cattle who follow the herd- god forbid they think out of the box- OMG- I think I need to go vent over on the _Heathen thread _about all of this- I am sorry! 

OK- back to Suzi's post Those from the dark side DO post on the DIS- this is where they were spawned Kind of like a bad "mutation" 

I would say that MOST of us on the DIS feel the same way- we like to laugh about things, make fun of a few people here and there, not downright be mean, but get a jab in here and there- hey- they bring it on themselves people! 

I also float around the boards thinking- - WHERE IN THE WORLD do these so called "do gooders" that post on the Dis come from!?- Do they know they are in the "minority" You know the old saying- the squeaky wheel gets the oil! So whine enough, get offended and you get the job done! 

Heck- Who does not lie, cheat, steal, fib, partake in a few immoral shenangigans once in a while for god's sake- it's fun!-  but you always have those few who have to swoop down- tell you how wrong you are, tell you how offended you made them, tell you how perfect their little pathetic lives are b/c of course, they do not partake in shenanigans- it would be wrong! 

OK- I am done venting- I was wondering where this all came from- but I guess they have been hiding in _MY personal depths of #ELL_! Nice to get it all out! 

Thank you for your time and patience!

Oh- and happy Sunday.......


----------



## Aunt Michelle

Hey there everyone - 

I hope everyone is doing well. I have been reading, just not having the time for posting with working 60 hours a week and working on my MBA full-time - I must be crazy. I did happen to log on last night and see what was going on and I would just like to offer an alternate opinion, if I may. 
I think many people around here (DIS) forget two things, one, this is marketed as a Disney Board, all things Disney - travel advice, reviews, tips, etc. Second thing is that it is also a family site, none of the threads or forums are locked down and teens and younger family members can access all the threads. For a site that is supposed to match the above criteria, sometimes it is appalling to see what gets posted. People who are supposedly wonderful parents to small children who are downright nasty to other people, fine role-model there, threads with topics about cheating spouses, insurance fraud, oh shoot, too many odd things I have seen. 
I am not suprised that the moderators are trying to exert some control. Those who have crossed over to that other board shock me just as much (and I am not a person who gets shocked by much), the gutter mouths, rude words and behavior. Sometimes neither here nor there makes a very nice commentary on basic human courtesy. 

(putting soapbox back in the closet) 

I hope everyone has a good week.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

hmm. you're gone for 1 night and you miss everthing..I'm confused..so WHAT happened???


----------



## Devil_Dog99

Shyvioletisme said:


> hmm. you're gone for 1 night and you miss everthing..I'm confused..so WHAT happened???



If it is what I think, the thread was on the Community Board and has been removed from the DIS entirely. But _*baby*_, from what I could see, some per*son* was looking for a *tip* but was *cut off *by the mods as it grew way out of scope of the DIS boards. Something we here on this thread do not have to worry about........ *wink wink nudge nudge*


----------



## maddhatir

Suzibrat said:


> I think that was hilarious! It's amazing you didn't get a slap on the hand for it in some way....cuz we all know things are perfect at Disney and nothing like that could ever happen
> The webmaster's little attempt to control the dark side bit him right in the butt and I think it was funny as hell.




awwwww geeze- I see some things are missing from Ms Brat's siggy and her beautiful Slipknot avatar is gone!


----------



## Barthy73

I think Suz is one of many users that got banned over the weekend as a result of this mess.


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> I think Suz is one of many users that got banned over the weekend as a result of this mess.








 That is what I was trying to say in my last post- but I did not want to use the "B" word-

...we are not alone 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	







Hey- is anyone else's photobucket all whacked?- It always jacks up my computer! I get all frozen and stuff!

Sorry- reading above- 
Translation: Is anyone else's photobucket slowing their computer down?

.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Wow...lots of stuff happening. I am almost glad and am in END oF Fiscal Year mode and did not partake in any shenanigans of my own...

Maybe we can start a Childless and still loving Disney thread on the CB now???


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> That is what I was trying to say in my last post- but I did not want to use the "B" word-
> 
> ...we are not alone
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Hey- is anyone else's photobucket all whacked?- It always jacks up my computer! I get all frozen and stuff!
> 
> Sorry- reading above-
> Translation: Is anyone else's photobucket slowing their computer down?
> 
> .




I keep getting logged out of mine...I have no idea why.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> mine's been ok lately...strangely...


----------



## PhotobearSam

I spent my sleepless night last night going between "Good Will Hunting" and "The Breakfast Club" on TV.,.Man I feel old sometimes...


How is everyone else today...?


----------



## Shyvioletisme

sure is quiet...


----------



## shazy03

Suzibrat said:


> Hixski, for playing Metallica and honoring the Queens of Metal Darkness I say you deserve a brand new fancy schmancy car!
> 
> The best money can buy! (Of course I won't be the one making the payments!  )
> 
> 
> 
> Hey Shazy! Nice to see you here with us! Love your bunnies!!!
> 
> Another early morning for me. I can't seem to sleep any later than 4:30 anymore. I really don't mind. I like watching the sun come up.
> How hot will Disney be at the end of September? The last time I went was in December and it was perfect, coming from the cold east coast, but my neighbor said we are "going to die" going the last week of September/first week of October. Should I be making out my will at this point?
> 
> 
> Hope you all



Many thanks for the welcome sorry for delayed response   We have because of being child free by choice, managed twice a year Feb/Sept for many years.  Being from rainy Britain, we love both times of year September definately warm and tropical, crowd levels have shot up, first time last year we had to reserve a table at liberty tavern nearly fainted in shock.  We have decided to leave the holidays until November next year we are trying to pay a lump sum off our mortgage, its so tempting to book, but we have to stay strong, short term loss for longer term gain, need to escape from the daily treadmill so we dont have such a low on our return to UK.  We love the gorgeous evenings and the blue sky, even with the huge rain showers Sept can bring


----------



## maddhatir

Revelation Sam!!!!!

Hixski is in CA! She told us a while back she would be there from Sat 'til Tuesday!

Well- she will have a nice surprise waiting for her when she gets home today- her siggy is gone! 

I was wondering where she was!


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> Revelation Sam!!!!!
> 
> Hixski is in CA! She told us a while back she would be there from Sat 'til Tuesday!
> 
> Well- she will have a nice surprise waiting for her when she gets home today- her siggy is gone!
> 
> I was wondering where she was!





Hixski is some special,...How does one get into trouble when you have not even logged on???


----------



## Rozzie

PhotobearSam said:


> Maybe we can start a Childless and still loving Disney thread on the CB now???



I'll back you up if you do!!!  We'll have to go in full armor though. 


HockeyKat---If it were me, and I was looking to avoid crowds, I'd do that 2nd week in Nov.  I took my mom that week 2 years ago, and it was amazing on the crowd difference.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

just wanting to say hi! and hoping there are still some of us left out there! Hope you are all doing well!


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> just wanting to say hi! and hoping there are still some of us left out there! Hope you are all doing well!



I know of 2 of us that are _MIA_... 

yup- it's very quiet- too quiet- creepy quiet.....I don't like it quiet!

I have off tomorrow and Friday, yay! Gotta use up those days before my year is up. 

It is supposed to rain though


----------



## PhotobearSam

Hello all...I just had one of my nieces over for the entire weekend. I love that kid, she is 8 years old but she made me feel really old... 


I really don't know how parents do it. It's exhausting. I can't imagine having a job and kids... My brother and his wife are doing a great job.

Do you guys ever have kids over?


Well, I have to finish the end of year taxes today...Then I will have one less headache to deal with.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Shyvioletisme said:


> just wanting to say hi! and hoping there are still some of us left out there! Hope you are all doing well!



It has been quiet lately....but I assumed part of it was the nice weather.  Here in New England last week was lovely so every moment I wasn't working I was outside trying to catch up on yard work & enjoying the sunshine!

Rain today & tomorrow - but I put down grass seed so that saves me having to water.  Now if I could just keep the birds out & convince the dog to stop walking all over it!


----------



## TXTurtles

PhotobearSam said:


> Hello all...I just had one of my nieces over for the entire weekend. I love that kid, she is 8 years old but she made me feel really old...
> 
> 
> I really don't know how parents do it. It's exhausting. I can't imagine having a job and kids... My brother and his wife are doing a great job.
> 
> Do you guys ever have kids over?



No but I teach and that's plenty.  Since I work with a non-profit educational group, I get to work with kids from newborn to 6th grade and it's great - if I need a dose of laughing at the craziness and cuteness of a toddler, I can get it.  If I'm in the mood for a tea party with 5 year-old girls, I can get it.  If I want to work with the hyper energy of 1st and 2nd graders, I can do that and if I want the worldly wisdom and personability of 5th and 6th graders, got that too.  And then I can go home to my quiet house and not worry about child proofing, digging UFOs out of the toddler's mouth, mediating between kids (siblings are the worst!!), or answering the five hundreth "why?"

I was chatting with one of our nursery supervisors and, after two little brothers got into a fight (one wanted to make a mess, one wanted the place neat) I mentioned how glad I was that I didn't have to mediate and make calls on who's right at home.  She asked if I wanted kids, I said no, and she was so relieved - she doesn't want any either but, since she's paying for her pediatric dentistry degree with babysitting and working for us, she gets a lot of "when are you going to start your family, dear" stuff.  So I have another childless friend and it's great.    We agreed that we love kids - in small doses.  I love it - if I want to see Disney through the eyes of a child, well, that's what nieces and nephews are for.  I figure it'll make our next adults-only trip all that much better knowing that we don't have to deal with baby swaps, stopping for every princess, or riding Dumbo 83 times.


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Hello all...I just had one of my nieces over for the entire weekend. I love that kid, she is 8 years old but she made me feel really old...
> 
> 
> I really don't know how parents do it. It's exhausting. I can't imagine having a job and kids... My brother and his wife are doing a great job.
> 
> Do you guys ever have kids over?
> 
> 
> Well, I have to finish the end of year taxes today...Then I will have one less headache to deal with.



Sam- we used to watch our niece when she was younger- it just wore us out. 

I know my BIL and SIL need a break sometimes- but I try and hint as much as possible that we did not have kids just for that reason- we do not want to watch them. 

I feel horrible and I love my nieces and nephews- but I am just not the babysitting type 

I never-EVER babysat when I was younger- I did not even want to do it then!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

TXTurtles said:


> I was chatting with one of our nursery supervisors and, after two little brothers got into a fight (one wanted to make a mess, one wanted the place neat) I mentioned how glad I was that I didn't have to mediate and make calls on who's right at home.  She asked if I wanted kids, I said no, and she was so relieved - she doesn't want any either but, since she's paying for her pediatric dentistry degree with babysitting and working for us, she gets a lot of "when are you going to start your family, dear" stuff.  So I have another childless friend and it's great.    We agreed that we love kids - in small doses.  I love it - if I want to see Disney through the eyes of a child, well, that's what nieces and nephews are for.  I figure it'll make our next adults-only trip all that much better knowing that we don't have to deal with baby swaps, stopping for every princess, or riding Dumbo 83 times.




that is great that you are able to work with someone and be friends with another child free person!! I have to admit it sounds like an interesting job! 

as for having kids over, no. If my SIL still lived in Texas near us, I'm sure my niece would be over all the time. But not the case. However I do substitute teach, elementary only and get plenty of my fill of the kiddos there..it's sometimes frustrating, sometimes funny, sometimes crazy...but I do love it. Then I get to go home to my nice quiet house and enjoy non crazy time with my DH!


----------



## shazy03

maddhatir said:


> Sam- we used to watch our niece when she was younger- it just wore us out.
> 
> I know my BIL and SIL need a break sometimes- but I try and hint as much as possible that we did not have kids just for that reason- we do not want to watch them.
> 
> I feel horrible and I love my nieces and nephews- but I am just not the babysitting type
> 
> I never-EVER babysat when I was younger- I did not even want to do it then!



Me too, I have nieces aged range from 2yrs upto 14yrs old, when the 14yr old was only 1 month, I thought I would give the baby sitting thing ago for the tiny amount of maternal feeling I had in me those many years ago, however, after an 1hr of the one to one babysitting and the crying of the baby, that was it I phoned my sister to come and collect, I have never been asked again   When we have family events and my nieces ask me to play shops with them, I tactfully advise that our shop is closed for stock taking, or if they want to play teacher/pupil then my school is always shut for holidays or teacher training, hense my disney name they call me auntie shazy crueller deville, however I do love animals


----------



## maddhatir

shazy03 said:


> Me too, I have nieces aged range from 2yrs upto 14yrs old, when the 14yr old was only 1 month, I thought I would give the baby sitting thing ago for the tiny amount of maternal feeling I had in me those many years ago, however, after an 1hr of the one to one babysitting and the crying of the baby, that was it I phoned my sister to come and collect, I have never been asked again   When we have family events and my nieces ask me to play shops with them, I tactfully advise that our shop is closed for stock taking, or if they want to play teacher/pupil then my school is always shut for holidays or teacher training, hense my disney name they call me auntie shazy crueller deville, however I do love animals



I sure did not do it for any maternal reasons!  

I just wanted my niece to know me- she was my first. We are still close. I see her and her brother a lot- but not sleep overs. 

DH and I were the first ones to take her to Disney, she was 3 and without mommy and daddy! THAT was an experience for child-free couple  As soon as she was born I had a Disney fund started b/c I knew I wanted to take her when she was 3.  

I HAVE been to Disney with her 3 times, this August will be 4, and she is only 6.


----------



## dolcimia

"I don't mind be ogled, ridiculed made to feel miniscule"


----------



## PhotobearSam

dolcimia said:


> "I don't mind be ogled, ridiculed made to feel miniscule"





Ummmmm, OK!?!?!!!!


----------



## tennvalgirl

Ahhhh.... 
This thread is a breath of fresh air.

Rant over


----------



## PhotobearSam

tennvalgirl said:


> Ahhhh....
> This thread is a breath of fresh air.
> 
> Rant over



I love your pic that dances in your thread...I feel old when I think of how long ago that was...LOL


----------



## dolcimia

Bet Madd figures it out............


----------



## TKDisneylover

PhotobearSam said:


> Do you guys ever have kids over?



Hey Everyone, I know it's been along time since I've posted but I have been lurking around.

Just wanted to say that I have two nieces who I spent a lot of time with when they were younger.  We had sleepovers for many holidays and we would bake cookies Christmas, decorate the Easter tree, visit a haunted house and then shop for and carve pumpkins, and then I always took them shopping individually for their birthday's.  One of my nieces is now 21 and moved out of state with her partner.  At Christmastime she emailed me and told me what great memories she had as a child baking cookies and wanted some of the recipes we used to make together.  What was truly a warm fuzzy that was from her that made me feel good about those times.  My other niece (the sister of the 21 year old) is now 17 and has a boyfriend she spends lots of time with.  I will take her shopping for her birthday gift & lunch one last time in November when she turns 18 (that's the cut-off for gifts), but as long as she's nearby I will always take her out for lunch or dinner for her future b-days.  I never did it for maternal reasons, it started out as a way to give my brother and sister-in-law a break from them from time to time and grew to really enjoy the time with them.  And it was so nice to drop them off at home when the weekend was over! 

On a side note to Maddhatir:  Johnny Depp has been very pleasant while filming here in Wisconsin.  He makes the paper or t.v. regularly because he takes the time to wave & sign autographs for the fans watching the filming.  I'm going to hopefully see him when watching some filming while he's in Milwaukee.  It's soooo exciting to see the man in person!!! 

Have a great day everyone!


----------



## TKDisneylover

dolcimia said:


> Bet Madd figures it out............



Since I said above that I've been lurking...... WELCOME BACK!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> On a side note to Maddhatir:  Johnny Depp has been very pleasant while filming here in Wisconsin.  He makes the paper or t.v. regularly because he takes the time to wave & sign autographs for the fans watching the filming.  I'm going to hopefully see him when watching some filming while he's in Milwaukee.  It's soooo exciting to see the man in person!!!
> 
> Have a great day everyone!



Well you better get me some pics missy!!!! 

You can't be tellin' me about seeing him in person and no promise of pics! 

Tell him Madd said "Hi!" He will remember me!!


----------



## maddhatir

I guess we are quoting our favorite songs now- I love Pantera's HOSTILE!!! 

To see
To bleed
Cannot be taught
In turn
You're making us
&^%$ing hostile
We stand alone


When you hear it- it makes you just .......nuts!  

Now my peep is gone- I can't talk black metal- so I hope you peeps do not mind me just coming out with random posts of songs I love to hear!?


----------



## PhotobearSam

I don't see the original post anymore...but I was starting to feel uncool again. I have never heard of that song.


Anyone want to quote me some Duran Duran


----------



## zima-cheryl

PhotobearSam said:


> I don't see the original post anymore...but I was starting to feel uncool again. I have never heard of that song.
> 
> 
> Anyone want to quote me some Duran Duran



_Her name is Rio and she dances on the sand
Just like that river twisting through a dusty land
And when she shines she really shows you all she can
Oh Rio, Rio dance across the Rio Grande_

We saw them a couple years ago @ Mohegan Sun in CT.  
GREAT SHOW!   

Yes, I'll admit it...I'm a child of the 80's.  Don't tempt me to dig out my old leg warmers!!!


----------



## PhotobearSam

zima-cheryl said:


> Yes, I'll admit it...I'm a child of the 80's.  Don't tempt me to dig out my old leg warmers!!!




 I would pay HUGE money to see that...


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> _Her name is Rio and she dances on the sand
> Just like that river twisting through a dusty land
> And when she shines she really shows you all she can
> Oh Rio, Rio dance across the Rio Grande_
> 
> We saw them a couple years ago @ Mohegan Sun in CT.
> GREAT SHOW!
> 
> Yes, I'll admit it...I'm a child of the 80's.  Don't tempt me to dig out my old leg warmers!!!



 OMG- In my head I started singing- MY name is Rio 

Memory is SHOT!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Madd - I thought of you when I read this.

"In response to a Washington Post column about the Flyers fans that read women and children could be security for Megedeth, lead singer Dave Mustaine sent a videotaped message of support. He wore Jason Smiths sweater.  "

(http://sports.yahoo.com/nhl/recap?gid=2008042815&prov=ap)

I'm cheering on your Flyers!  
DH is still sulking around since the Canadians beat out his Bruins!   
Hopefully the Red Sox will get into a nice winning streak & take his mind off the hockey season.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Madd - I thought of you when I read this.
> 
> "In response to a Washington Post column about the Flyers fans that read women and children could be security for Megedeth, lead singer Dave Mustaine sent a videotaped message of support. He wore Jason Smiths sweater.  "
> 
> (http://sports.yahoo.com/nhl/recap?gid=2008042815&prov=ap)
> 
> I'm cheering on your Flyers!
> DH is still sulking around since the Canadians beat out his Bruins!
> Hopefully the Red Sox will get into a nice winning streak & take his mind off the hockey season.




OMG! I love my boys Dave AND Jason!!!! See my Jason in my siggy- the all bloodied up one! I call him my "other" Capt (Capt Jack is my first!)

Dave Mustaine is so cocky I LOVE it! 

I am in heaven!!! I have been searching around for the darn Dave clip- but nothing on YouTube!!!!
 

So wait- what do they mean- the women and children are just all tough and nasty like men?? How DARE they actually some of those women do scare me too! 

I read about the "O'Canada" thing- Flyers fans are so obnoxious! THAT does not surprise me in the least! The boo everything and anything- they do not descriminate You can have a disability, roll out in a wheelchair and those people will boo you! 

Years ago I was at a Flyers vs Devils game in Philly- it was towards the end of the game and I saw these Flyers fans beating on a poor guy that had a Devils jersey on! It was right in the seats! 

Come on! I think it shows some B@lls to even walk into another venue with your team jersey on- leave the guy alone! 

I am going to have to go post this on our hockey thread on the CB- have you been over???


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> Years ago I was at a Flyers vs Devils game in Philly- it was towards the end of the game and I saw these Flyers fans beating on a poor guy that had a Devils jersey on! It was right in the seats!
> 
> Come on! I think it shows some B@lls to even walk into another venue with your team jersey on- leave the guy alone!



I never understood that...   
Ultimately we are all hockey fans; even if we are cheering on different teams.  I can appriciate another team if they are doing well & I can certainly talk in a civil way to other fans.

Over the years the only time I ever had a problem was @ MSG.  I was wearing my Thrashers gear & this guy got in my face...  I have to confess he was big & I was scared!!  
Nothing happened thank goodness....but I'll never go back there again!!!  
We've never had problems at the Garden in Boston... Fans there seem a little more mellow.    There is usually some good natured ribbing... but never a problem.




maddhatir said:


> I am going to have to go post this on our hockey thread on the CB- have you been over???



No - I've not ventured over there....  From all the things I've heard about the CB I'm a bit afraid...


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Well you better get me some pics missy!!!!
> 
> You can't be tellin' me about seeing him in person and no promise of pics!
> 
> Tell him Madd said "Hi!" He will remember me!!



I promise I will do my best!  And you know I will post them here just for bragging rights! 



PhotobearSam said:


> I don't see the original post anymore...



Do you think my response caused this?!   I so apologize if it did!


----------



## maddhatir

If _anyone_ cares ........

I just ordered the new Testament CD "The Formation Of Damnation" I have been listening to some tracks on Sirius b/c they are "celebrating" the release!

And by the sounds of some of the tracks- it sounds like something to celebrate!!!!
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	







So- give dear Corey Taylor a rest and get out there and buy it! 






Rock On peeps!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Do you think my response caused this?!   I so apologize if it did!



 I think it may have been a _snafooooooo_


----------



## zima-cheryl

DH just sent me this & I thought it was pretty funny.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHXBL6bzAR4&eurl
(it is about 7 minutes)

Anyone else w/yodeling cats?


----------



## PhotobearSam

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WML7zy6HfgA


----------



## tennvalgirl

PhotobearSam said:


> I love your pic that dances in your thread...I feel old when I think of how long ago that was...LOL



Thanks!  When I saw this video after hearing the song on the radio, I said WTH!


----------



## PhotobearSam

anything to add to my "Funniest thing you have seen on youtube..." post?


http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1811143


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> I never understood that...
> Ultimately we are all hockey fans; even if we are cheering on different teams.  I can appriciate another team if they are doing well & I can certainly talk in a civil way to other fans.
> 
> Over the years the only time I ever had a problem was @ MSG.  I was wearing my Thrashers gear & this guy got in my face...  I have to confess he was big & I was scared!!
> Nothing happened thank goodness....but I'll never go back there again!!!
> We've never had problems at the Garden in Boston... Fans there seem a little more mellow.    There is usually some good natured ribbing... but never a problem.



Last night during the game one of the Canadiens tried to block a shot......with his stomach! OUCH! He was doubled over and crawling to the boards- you know how it is just common courtesy to cheer when the poor guys gets up and taken off the ice (b/c he is REALLY) hurt- well our fans were booing him We USED to cheer- what the heck is happening?!

I can't even believe a GUY would do that to a woman! .............Scumbag! To bad you didn't have your mace with you- that would have shut him up! 






> No - I've not ventured over there....  From all the things I've heard about the CB I'm a bit afraid...



It is OK on the hockey thread- everyone is nice there!- If they are not nice to you when you get there....they will have to answer to ME!  

There is even a Mod who posts there, she's cool- she is a Canadiens fan- she would not let things get out of hand- not sure how long she will be around though b/c the Flyers are up 3 games to 1! But I am never overly cocky about things like that b/c things can turn out not quite like what you expected!


----------



## zima-cheryl

PhotobearSam said:


> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WML7zy6HfgA



That's great!!!

My big boy Tiger is sitting here & you should see his ears & eyes when I played that one!  I don't know which was funnier?  The video?  Or his reaction!


----------



## PoohNTuck

Hey all...

Nice to see that everyone is enjoying themselves.  Looks like things have been busy.  DH and I have been vacation planning and watching lots of fun movies lately.  Unfortunately we've been working so hard the past few months it seems we have had little free time together!  Had some deep thoughts...thought I'd share them here and get some feeback from like minded folks:

The doc officially declared us "sperm free" last week.   

However, I broke down in tears a few days later at the thought of losing DH.  Now, having children to keep from being alone is not a good reason.  But we're not close (physically or emotionally) to either of our families.  We spend most of our time together.   Since we're not planning kids (hopefully puppies once we become homeowners in the indeterminate future) I just wonder what the best way to create a community around us will be.  In my ideal world, I want to have a community of friends (ideally childfree couples) that we could be friendly with and have holiday celebrations with and regularly go out with or have over to hangout.  In case anything were ever to happen to me or DH we would have a support system of close friends (who are like family) in place.

Does anybody have this where they are?  Know of any great cf groups in the states?  I'd be willing to take that into consideration when we move somewhere.  

It just seems like a lot of people are still close to their original families and spend a lot of time with bros/sis/etc... anybody in a similar boat?  Or have similar thoughts?

Looking forward to your opinions...


----------



## Barthy73

Hey Pooh,

My DW and I share your thoughts about being cf, and we're not terribly close with our families either.  We're slowly building a support system of other childfrees and couples with grown children as well.  If your thoughts of moving ever include South Carolina, we'd certainly be happy to offer our experiences and friendship!

John


----------



## PoohNTuck

Thanks John,

We're dealing with the New England storms for a few more years but have definitely considered S.C.  We just need to relocate my MIL from Charleston area first 

Good to know the life exists somewhere...


----------



## zima-cheryl

PoohNTuck said:


> Thanks John,
> 
> We're dealing with the New England storms for a few more years but have definitely considered S.C.  We just need to relocate my MIL from Charleston area first
> 
> Good to know the life exists somewhere...



Pooh, 

Wow - some heavy thoughts for a Friday!  Weekends are supposed to be fun & carefree...  

Seriously - where in NE are you?  We are in W. Mass (Go Red Sox!  )

The "someday" question is a big one.  You aren't the only one who struggles w/that...we know other CF couples & that is a common topic. 
I'm blessed that although physically we are far away, I am emotionally close to my family (2 brothers, 1 SIL & 5 niece/nephews).  DH however is an only child & not overly close to his family.  So in essence, while living here in NE we are "on our own".

Building that network takes time....and it evolves over time.  It looks different today than it did a year ago...and will look different in another year.  Unfortunately people come & go in life.   

Based on our experience, the best advice I can share is get active!  Between yoga, church, bowling, belly dance classes, the hockey booster club, volunteering at the library, being semi-active in our local No Kidding group, etc., etc., etc., (whew...no wonder I'm so tired all the time!) we have met a lot of people and built up that network.  

I'm amazed -- 15 years ago when I moved here I knew no one, and now I can't go to the grocery store w/out bumping into someone I know.  

I've also learned that when you need that support - it often comes from the folks you least expect.  And, a bit disappointing, doesn't always come from the ones you think it would.  

You also need to be smart - get your will, power of attorney, etc. all done.  And be sure to be investing in your own retirement.  I think for CF folks this is so much more important, because there is not the same support that others w/kids might have (although I've seen some families where that support doesn't happen...you just never know  ).  
I think our choice to be CF makes us have to be a little smarter financially.  That said - w/out the expense of kids it is much easier to tuck away gobs of $$ for retirement & still have $$ left over to play & travel!  

Anyhow....sorry to ramble so long, but those are a few of my thoughts.  

Now stop thinking so serious & go enjoy the weekend!
After my manicure tomorrow we are going bowling (I know...bad planning!   ) and Sunday, assuming it doesn't rain, we are off to a baseball game!


----------



## drummersmask

maddhatir said:


> If _anyone_ cares ........
> 
> So- give dear Corey Taylor a rest and get out there and buy it!
> 
> Rock On peeps!



Ms. Madd....I would give Corey Taylor a break but his lovely little drummer keeps me totally enraptured  Won't be too much longer and I will get to see the "9 in the Knot" and I'm counting down the days....94 days to be exact! (not that I'm counting mind you  )


----------



## maddhatir

drummersmask said:


> Ms. Madd....I would give Corey Taylor a break but his lovely little drummer keeps me totally enraptured  Won't be too much longer and I will get to see the "9 in the Knot" and I'm counting down the days....94 days to be exact! (not that I'm counting mind you  )




 I have to check and be sure of the dates in NJ- I just got the newest Down CD- I was talking about Phil Anselmo with a cool freap mom of all people,  on the freap chat thread of all places! 

I had a Phil craving so I had to stop in Hot Topic and pick it up today!

.............................


----------



## WDWguru

We're here in our BWV boardwalk view villa and the camera is set up! We'll have the camera on showing live streaming video (and audio!) as long as our internet access stays up until we check out the morning of May 7th.

Go to www.tivogirl.com/bwvcam

I have the audio setting pretty low quality so it doesn't suck all the bandwidth up. If you want to chat with others watching at the same time, you can hit the little talk bubble icon at the bottom right of the window. I'm using the same software I used for the AKV cam in December, so it's LIVE video and not just stills. ENJOY!!


----------



## Rozzie

PoohNTuck said:


> However, I broke down in tears a few days later at the thought of losing DH.  Now, having children to keep from being alone is not a good reason.  But we're not close (physically or emotionally) to either of our families.  We spend most of our time together.   Since we're not planning kids (hopefully puppies once we become homeowners in the indeterminate future) I just wonder what the best way to create a community around us will be.  In my ideal world, I want to have a community of friends (ideally childfree couples) that we could be friendly with and have holiday celebrations with and regularly go out with or have over to hangout.  In case anything were ever to happen to me or DH we would have a support system of close friends (who are like family) in place.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I just got a chill down my spine! I could have written this word for word a short time ago.  Sometimes I struggle with the fact it is VERY hard to find CF couples in our area, and we really don't have outside friends.  We live in a very pigeonholed area where everyone looks the same and acts the same, and does the whole 2.3 kid routine like clockwork.  We really stick out like sore thumbs sometimes, LOL!  

We don't belong to a church (or really care to), and work all the time.  We only get 2 days off together a month.  We are super close to each other, and really rather be with each other than anybody else.  We both come from dysfunctional families, and do not have very close relationships with siblings.  My brother, for instance, lives 3 miles down road and I see him and his kids maybe 6 times a year.  But you know, one day I woke up, and I quit worrying about losing my DH.  I used to almost have panic attacks thinking about it.  I figured I was wasting energy on the "what if's", and not the now.  

What I did is found online friends who are CF, some are not.  We actually are a really close bunch on another MB, and meet up at WDW at least once a year and all vacation together.  It has made all the difference in my life.  Some of the best friends I have ever had, and know I could call any of them if I needed.  Online friendships make the best IRL friendships in my experience, no pressure during the week to meet up, etc.   I used to struggle with why I didn't have a lot of friends, till I discovered I was capable of making friends, just had to find some with similar interests.  KWIM?

I wish you the best, and if you are ever in the coastal Alabama area (which we affectionately refer to as the Armpit') I'll be happy to meet up!!  Or in WDW for that matter.  I love meeting up with people down there for drinks.


----------



## PoohNTuck

Thanks Cheryl and Rozzie.

Rozzie, my hubby laughed at your post!  It is us, word for word almost.  

We are struggling with whether to stay here (or move d/t cold weather) and making friends is really going to take a lot of effort.  It's easy to find people to hang out with if you're willing to pay for dinners, movies, clubs and drinking... it's harder to find true friendships.  People you can hang out with on a Friday night at your house, with a frozen pizza and a jug (or two) of fresh margarita... that would be my ideal.

Here's to hoping we find that!  Thank you both for the supportive words...

Pink


----------



## PhotobearSam

Hello guys...I know what you mean.

I panic if DH is not home at exactly the right time and I am constantly tellinghim to drive safe. I would go nuts if I lost him.

We moved to my home town where a lot of my school friends still live but they are sooooo boring. One couple we are friends with have not left the house in like 3 years since their baby was born and now they are waiting for baby #2. They think the world will end if they get a sitter...

Well, we also have some friends who just don't like going out...We invite them over all the time. They come, we feed them, we even took them to Disney but they hardly ever do anything else. 

I lot of my friends have kids. It makes it hard to make friends...I wish there was a no-kidding chapter around here but alas...not to be.


----------



## Rozzie

PhotobearSam said:


> Hello guys...I know what you mean.
> 
> I panic if DH is not home at exactly the right time and I am constantly tellinghim to drive safe. I would go nuts if I lost him.
> 
> .




OMG, I do the same thing!  I find I have to "talk myself down" if he is 5 minutes late, I always think he is in a car accident or some type of dreadful robbery at the restaurant.  Seriously I used to obsess about it, and still worry a lot.  I think I will always be a worrier, it just my nature.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Rozzie said:


> OMG, I do the same thing!  I find I have to "talk myself down" if he is 5 minutes late, I always think he is in a car accident or some type of dreadful robbery at the restaurant.  Seriously I used to obsess about it, and still worry a lot.  I think I will always be a worrier, it just my nature.


Glad to know I am not alone.

I just wish we could find more people that want to hang out. We have a great home, and we love to entertain...Ah well...Maybe I will start a chapter of No-Kidding on my own.


----------



## Rozzie

PhotobearSam said:


> Glad to know I am not alone.
> 
> I just wish we could find more people that want to hang out. We have a great home, and we love to entertain...Ah well...Maybe I will start a chapter of No-Kidding on my own.



I can't imagine me starting a No-Kidding chapter here, it'd just be Mr Roz and I sitting in the living room staring at each other!!


----------



## drummersmask

maddhatir said:


> I have to check and be sure of the dates in NJ- I just got the newest Down CD- I was talking about Phil Anselmo with a cool freap mom of all people,  on the freap chat thread of all places!
> 
> I had a Phil craving so I had to stop in Hot Topic and pick it up today!
> 
> .............................



I was hoping to get up to Hot Topic today (it's 2 hours away!) to snag a copy of Wednesday 13's newest "Skeletons" but DH is working 7 day shifts, 5 am to 7pm and my car is in the shop getting a new motor. I've been bored out of my skull all day, just moping around, grumbling about being cooped up in the house. Probably should have done more housework but I wasn't THAT bored!  
How's everyone else today?
Sam-good to see you. How's things with you?
It's nice to see that this thread is always picking up new posters. The more the merrier, huh? Think I'll go make some Rice Krispie Treats. That ought to kill about 5 minutes


----------



## PhotobearSam

Life could be better if we were getting more summer reservations for our business...Anyone want to come to the East Coast of Canada for beaches and Lobster this summer?


----------



## zima-cheryl

Rozzie said:


> What I did is found online friends who are CF, some are not.



This is a good point... many of our friends have kids.  Some older, some younger... it does make it more challenging but don't pass up on a chance to connect w/someone just because they have kids.  And eventually the kids grow up & then they have more time for a social life again.  



Rozzie said:


> We actually are a really close bunch on another MB, and meet up at WDW at least once a year and all vacation together.  It has made all the difference in my life.  Some of the best friends I have ever had, and know I could call any of them if I needed.



Another good point - it is nice to have friends & aquantances nearby, but now days it is so easy to connect & stay in touch that people can be anywhere!  I'm still in touch w/old college friends & others from over the years.  (Hooray for the internet & e-mail!)  

And despite the ever rising price of gas   we still enjoy hopping in the car & visiting folks when ever we get the chance.


----------



## zima-cheryl

PhotobearSam said:


> Life could be better if we were getting more summer reservations for our business...Anyone want to come to the East Coast of Canada for beaches and Lobster this summer?



Business is slow?  Not suprised w/the rising price of gas.  From everything I'm reading they say travel is going to be way down this summer.

Some places are already advertising they will give you a gas card if you stay at the hotel for so many nights.  And Amtrak has been advertising like crazy that you should ride the train & save your gas.

Wonder where the gas is going to peak?   And just how bad it is going to make things?!?


----------



## drummersmask

We caught our local gas station posting the price as $3.58 a gallon but when we looked at the reciept it said $4.36 a gallon!   And yes, we did raise the roof. We won't be going there for gas anymore and are telling everyone in the neighborhood to beware. Talk about gouging!


----------



## maddhatir

drummersmask said:


> We caught our local gas station posting the price as $3.58 a gallon but when we looked at the reciept it said $4.36 a gallon!   And yes, we did raise the roof. We won't be going there for gas anymore and are telling everyone in the neighborhood to beware. Talk about gouging!



You should get your camera and take a shot of the price they are advertising- Man- I would be calling somebody!!

ETA- DH said to contact Weights and Measures.

.


----------



## maddhatir

DH and I went to a communion party today for his cousins daughter.

We walk in and his cousin comes up to us and said- "Are you guys crazy- why in the word would you want to be here with all of these kids if you do not have to? I sure wouldn't be!"

I said "we do not have much of a choice anymore, any place we are invited to go- people have kids"  

And let me tall ya- the kids were "swarming"


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> DH and I went to a communion party today for his cousins daughter.
> 
> We walk in and his cousin comes up to us and said- "Are you guys crazy- why in the word would you want to be here with all of these kids if you do not have to? I sure wouldn't be!"
> 
> I said "we do not have much of a choice anymore, any place we are invited to go- people have kids"
> 
> And let me tall ya- the kids were "swarming"



Sounds scary...


----------



## KirklandTutu

One of my teachers is sick...
so I have the joy of teaching the five year olds tomorrow...
on a bad ankle.

Kill me now.


----------



## drummersmask

Good Morning everyone!
Madd- I see you survived the party. Must have been alcohol involved to get you thru it!  
 Sam- I can't PM you back because you aren't allowed to PM here unless you have 10 posts and I think I'm only up to around 5 or so. I don't get on here as much as I used to. And this is the only thread that I post on. It's a shame that the cost of gas is raising so much havoc with everything (like your business). We are seeing alot of family owned restaurants close down here because people just can't afford to eat out, buy groceries, buy gas and heating fuel and live. It's a shame. I'm glad that we booked and paid for our Disney trip back in February because the price of airfare is getting scary!  
KirklandTutu- did you survive the day? Or should we send out a search party?
It's going to be a beautiful day here today so I'm opening all the windows and airing the place out. In between work, housework and cooking. I'm going to need a whole lot of coffee so I better get drinking.  
Have a good day everyone & take care!


----------



## zima-cheryl

drummersmask said:


> I'm glad that we booked and paid for our Disney trip back in February because the price of airfare is getting scary!



Isn't that the truth!  I just double checked a flight we have at the end of this month & since we booked several months ago it has more than doubled in price.  So basically now you can't even get 1 seat on the plane for what we paid for 2 seats.

Glad we booked when we did, but wow!  No wonder the travel industry is taking such a hit.  

I'm telling you Amtrak is looking better every day:  Cheaper prices, no security lines, friendly service & they get you there on time!


----------



## maddhatir

drummersmask said:


> It's a shame that the cost of gas is raising so much havoc with everything (like your business). We are seeing alot of family owned restaurants close down here because people just can't afford to eat out, buy groceries, buy gas and heating fuel and live. It's a shame. I'm glad that we booked and paid for our Disney trip back in February because the price of airfare is getting scary!



Hi!!!

I am really scared for DH- he is a mechanic and usually spring/summer is a good time for his shop b/c a lot of people will be taking road trips etc and need their cars worked on- but now, with the price of gas- not many people will be driving ANYWHERE! 

Does this freaking president realize what the %$#@ he is doing to this country!!!!!!!!!! It all trickles down!

You know- I have seen shows about Nostradamus and I always remember him mentioning "the anti-christ" I always thought he meant we should be careful of the anti-christ coming form the Middle East- however, I am almost possitive the anti-christ is right under our noses- our president  

Remember this is just MHO!!! 

Thank goodness we got our airline tix a few months ago- I was going to wait- but DH said you better get them now, b/c with the gas prices rising- you are not going to get a better price- we ended paying 271.00- I guess I should be gald I got them when I did!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

yeah, we're in the bad boat concerning airline prices...we are supposed to be going to georgia to visit DH's family this summer and have just found a week that works for everyone...but right now, we can't afford airline tickets...it's ridiculous...So I'm really not sure what we're going to do, because obviously it isn't going to get better anytime soon...


----------



## phinz

I just did a search to see what tickets for my 40th birthday trip to Key West would cost today. I bought the tickets the day they went on sale for the trip in February, '09 having already booked and paid for the compound of houses we're renting. We bought 10 airline tickets at $501 each, with taxes, etc. Today they are almost $1000 apiece before taxes. I'm glad we got them when we did.


----------



## maddhatir

phinz said:


> I just did a search to see what tickets for my 40th birthday trip to Key West would cost today. I bought the tickets the day they went on sale for the trip in February, '09 having already booked and paid for the compound of houses we're renting. We bought 10 airline tickets at $501 each, with taxes, etc. Today they are almost $1000 apiece before taxes. I'm glad we got them when we did.




 Glad to hear you got in at a better price, I was going to say good price, but 501.00 is still alittle crazy!

BTW-- Welcome!!


----------



## zima-cheryl

DH found this website the other day...

You put in the zip code & it gives you local gas station prices cheapest to highest:
http://autos.msn.com/everyday/gasstations.aspx?zip=01085

Unfortunately all ours seem to be w/in about 5 cents of each other.
But I guess depending on your car's tank size that could add up.


----------



## KirklandTutu

drummersmask said:


> KirklandTutu- did you survive the day? Or should we send out a search party?



No, the five year olds stole my brain, I'm still recovering.  And best yet!  she's still ill, so I get to do it all again tomorrow.


----------



## phinz

maddhatir said:


> BTW-- Welcome!!<img src="images/smilies/wink.gif" border="0" alt="" title="Wink" smilieid="5" class="inlineimg" />



Heck, I posted on this thread the first time over a year ago. November '06, to be exact. I just disappeared for a while until someone posted in another thread about the 501st Legion.  Thanks for the welcome anyway.


----------



## maddhatir

phinz said:


> Heck, I posted on this thread the first time over a year ago. November '06, to be exact. I just disappeared for a while until someone posted in another thread about the 501st Legion.  Thanks for the welcome anyway.



 I can't remember yesterday 

...Welcome...._back_!


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> I can't remember yesterday
> 
> ...Welcome...._back_!



I hate that I can relate to this statement...


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> I hate that I can relate to this statement...



Sam- it's OK, you just have to accept it.....I have......


----------



## maddhatir

OMG- 

Me, SIL and my niece are going to Disney in August 

Well- We got our tix a few months ago however, ... I was hesitant to order them at that time b/c the price was  $271.00 and I thought I should wait and they might go lower, DH said we better get a move on it b/c prices will keep going up- so I bought them. SIL said suck it up and don't look back HA! 

Thank goodness I did!..........................

I just checked- the same exact flight we are taking there and back is NOW 

$590.00 PER PERSON


----------



## drcandon

Just found this thread - fascinating - I guess DW and I never realised that so many other folks got the same reactions we always have...maybe I can top everyone here...DW and I got married at 19 years old ( yea I know nuts), everyone was sure she was expecting, well, 30 or so years later this has to be the longest gestation ever...we have gotten every weird look and strange comment you can imagine...We started going to Disney probably 20 yeasrs ago I guess - of course at that time most of the rest of Disney like AK and DS was non existant - Epcot was just being realised. We got a LOT of strange reactions wandering around with no children..ya just get used to it...

OF course now and our age couples ar enow child free again - but for different reasons - well I should say some are - what with older kids inability to leave the nest these days..kids are staying longer - and we are still going strong...

Oh yea - like the Harley avatar - we just got our first Harley after nearly 22 years of riding...I guess some folks take longer to come to their senses huh


----------



## maddhatir

drcandon said:


> Just found this thread - fascinating - I guess DW and I never realised that so many other folks got the same reactions we always have...maybe I can top everyone here...DW and I got married at 19 years old ( yea I know nuts), everyone was sure she was expecting, well, 30 or so years later this has to be the longest gestation ever...we have gotten every weird look and strange comment you can imagine...We started going to Disney probably 20 yeasrs ago I guess - of course at that time most of the rest of Disney like AK and DS was non existant - Epcot was just being realised. We got a LOT of strange reactions wandering around with no children..ya just get used to it...
> 
> OF course now and our age couples ar enow child free again - but for different reasons - well I should say some are - what with older kids inability to leave the nest these days..kids are staying longer - and we are still going strong...
> 
> Oh yea - like the Harley avatar - we just got our first Harley after nearly 22 years of riding...I guess some folks take longer to come to their senses huh



Welcome! 

I don't pay no mind to anyone around me when I am in Disney- I am in my own little "happy world" 

DH just got the Harley in 2001. We have wanted for for years! and I said- oh for god's sake just get it will ya! 

I love it!


----------



## drummersmask

Welcome drcandon! Hope you'll visit here often.
Madd- are you counting down the days till your trip like I am. Ours is in September but as much as I am looking forward to it I don't want the summer to speed by too fast. KWIM? I am hoping to take a trip back home to NY in June. I was supposed to be going home for Mother's Day but my car is STILL in the shop. I think they're holding it hostage until I bake them a cake or something. Geez! So now I'll make thr trip in time for my Gram's 94th birthday. I have a business trip/pleasure trip in August and then onto Disney at the end of September. Think I'll have to plan something for July. It will feel weird not to go anywhere for a whole month  
DH is working mega hours at work right now. 7 days a week 12-16 hour shifts. It sucks, because i miss him, but we are just grateful he has a job. They are far and few between in this place. When he went thru this last year, at the same time, the dogs were so PO'd at him they wouldn't even give him a second glance when he walked thru the door. They crack me up 
It's so beautiful today that I think I'll start my spring cleaning. Or not....
Have a good day everyone!!!


----------



## drummersmask

KirklandTutu said:


> No, the five year olds stole my brain, I'm still recovering.  And best yet!  she's still ill, so I get to do it all again tomorrow.



Did you make it out alive or should we send a search party armed with chocolate and booze????


----------



## PhotobearSam

drummersmask said:


> DH is working mega hours at work right now. 7 days a week 12-16 hour shifts. It sucks, because i miss him, but we are just grateful he has a job. TWhen he went thru this last year, at the same time, the dogs were so PO'd at him they wouldn't even give him a second glance when he walked thru the door. They crack me up
> It's so beautiful today that I think I'll start my spring cleaning. Or not....
> Have a good day everyone!!!





I can totally relate....unfortunately. My cats get pissy when I work 12-15 hr days all summer...


----------



## Barthy73

Hey everyone,

Sorry I've been MIA.  Work has been crazy here, too.  Not necessarily the long hours as previously posted, but I've been traveling a lot.  Next week should be the last of it for a while.  *whew*

This weekend should be fun though.  We've got 40 people coming over for a belated Cinco de Mayo party.  Having a bar is wonderful!  We just added a Jimmy Buffet Margaritaville Margarita maker.  It should be fun.  Did I look like a true alcoholic when I bought four 1.75L bottles of Tequila and 4 cases of corona at one time?


----------



## maddhatir

drummersmask said:


> Madd- are you counting down the days till your trip like I am. Ours is in September but as much as I am looking forward to it I don't want the summer to speed by too fast. It sucks, because i miss him,



ITA- I do not want to wish the summer away so I am "playing it cool" with my Disney trip! I have to countdown on my calander- but I am so happy it is finally warm- I want it to stay that way for a while!!



Barthy73 said:


> Hey everyone,
> 
> Sorry I've been MIA.  Work has been crazy here, too.  Not necessarily the long hours as previously posted, but I've been traveling a lot.  Next week should be the last of it for a while.  *whew*
> 
> This weekend should be fun though.  We've got 40 people coming over for a belated Cinco de Mayo party.  Having a bar is wonderful!  We just added a Jimmy Buffet Margaritaville Margarita maker.  It should be fun.  Did I look like a true alcoholic when I bought four 1.75L bottles of Tequila and 4 cases of corona at one time?



I have been so busy at work too- I am not on the Dis during the day as much anymore b/c I am swamped. 

Barthy- that is funny that you mention the Margarita maker- b/c the girls over on the freebie thread were talking about the next "house party" to sign up for, I have no idea how they work b/c I do not do them- and this is what you get if you get in:

Key West Frozen Concoction Maker is the Star of The Show.

A $299 value. Its yours FREE...and yours to keep. Be sure to review the machine demo (scroll down to Virtual Demo and See it in Action"). Please also read the Quick Start Guide that will be packed in the box to try your machine out before your party. Youll see firsthand how it does all the workwhile you get all the credit. 

More FREE Margaritaville® goodies in your party pack:

♦ 1 Frozen Concoction Maker Travel Bag

♦ 1 Margaritaville® Salt & Lime Tray

♦ 15 brochures with exclusive discount code

♦ 1 Margaritaville® Frozen Concoction Make Party Pack (includes large ice reservoir, mixer bottle and plastic blending jar)

♦ 15 floral leis

♦ 12 drink umbrellas

This is the website if you want to check it out.


----------



## maddhatir

OMG help me! I am so stinking tired- I am going to fall asleep at my work computer 

I had to go upstairs and make some coffee- I never do that in the afternoon. It is a dreary, rainy day here in NJ.

I had a headache earlier so I put on my baroque station and let me tell ya- that isn't helping matters! I need to pick up the speed and turn on some crazy @$$ music to wake my butt up! 

All I have to say is YAY! b/c tonight is the Flyers first night of the 3 round of the Stanley cup playoffs  I HAVE to stay awake for that! 

This is a sad story- they are televising a funeral for a Philadelphia police officer who was shot by some scumbag while robbing a bank! But the officer's son was speaking in church and he was saying his father was looking forward to the Flyers winning. 

He asked the church and everyone watching to give a yell for the Flyers in honor of his father- and the whole church let out a 'LET'S GO FLYERS" for the police officer 

UGH- I feel like I am manic- my post goes from low to high back to low...... 

Back to work for me!


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> OMG help me! I am so stinking tired- I am going to fall asleep at my work computer
> 
> I had to go upstairs and make some coffee- I never do that in the afternoon. It is a dreary, rainy day here in NJ.
> 
> I had a headache earlier so I put on my baroque station and let me tell ya- that isn't helping matters! I need to pick up the speed and turn on some crazy @$$ music to wake my butt up!
> 
> All I have to say is YAY! b/c tonight is the Flyers first night of the 3 round of the Stanley cup playoffs  I HAVE to stay awake for that!
> 
> This is a sad story- they are televising a funeral for a Philadelphia police officer who was shot by some scumbag while robbing a bank! But the officer's son was speaking in church and he was saying his father was looking forward to the Flyers winning.
> 
> He asked the church and everyone watching to give a yell for the Flyers in honor of his father- and the whole church let out a 'LET'S GO FLYERS" for the police officer
> 
> UGH- I feel like I am manic- my post goes from low to high back to low......
> 
> Back to work for me!





How sad...I am a Canadians fan but will surely give a shout to the Flyers in his honour...That poor family.


----------



## KirklandTutu

drummersmask said:


> Did you make it out alive or should we send a search party armed with chocolate and booze????



Barely, I was very close to just sitting down on the floor and letting them run circles around me.  I thought I was going to cry.  Moments like those really drive home the fact that I do not ever, ever want kids.  

And I was out of wine that night!!!!!!


----------



## zima-cheryl

drummersmask said:


> Did you make it out alive or should we send a search party armed with chocolate and booze????



How about chocolate booze?  2 great taste...1 product?
The Godiva original chocolate is good, but occassionally the white chocolate liqueur hits the spot!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> This is a sad story- they are televising a funeral for a Philadelphia police officer who was shot by some scumbag while robbing a bank! But the officer's son was speaking in church and he was saying his father was looking forward to the Flyers winning.
> 
> He asked the church and everyone watching to give a yell for the Flyers in honor of his father- and the whole church let out a 'LET'S GO FLYERS" for the police officer
> 
> Back to work for me!



I'll give a shout out - "Let's Go Flyers" - in the officers memory.

Please just tell me that the scumbag was killed during the robbery too?!? 
I hate the idea of wasting our tax $$ on a trial & jail time for a cop killer.


----------



## mrs_hower726

zima-cheryl said:


> I'll give a shout out - "Let's Go Flyers" - in the officers memory.
> 
> Please just tell me that the scumbag was killed during the robbery too?!?
> I hate the idea of wasting out tax $$ on a trial & jail time for a cop killer.





Of course that scumbag wasn't killed, that would be justice.  He was found in an abandoned house though on Wednesday night after getting a tip from a former FBI agent.  He did confess so no trial, he will just be in jail soaking up our tax dollars for the rest of his life.


----------



## KirklandTutu

zima-cheryl said:


> How about chocolate booze?  2 great taste...1 product?
> The Godiva original chocolate is good, but occassionally the white chocolate liqueur hits the spot!



I do make a mean chocolate martini, but it takes chambord and vodka with chocolate syrup.  mmmmmm


----------



## Rozzie

Hey everyone, happy weekend.  I had my first Saturday doing emergency cases at my new job today.  Nothing like trying to stop people from bleeding to death to second guess your job choice!  I hate these weeks with only 1 day off.  It sucks being a adult sometimes, I just wish I could be a SAHHW.  (stay at home house wife  )  

I did make a really big life decision this week, almost talked myself into signing up for the Princess 1/2 Marathon in  March.  Not a big Princess girl, Mulan more my type, but it's a great time frame for me to get my lazy butt in gear and train to run 13 miles.  DH of course was supportive as usual, but made it clear he will be a spectator in the training.  

Oh, next weekend, I have my nephews recital (yawn I hate those things, they take forever and their part lasts 2 seconds) and then the next day, my favorite thing to do--my niece's 2nd birthday party at one of those places where they inject them with straight glucose into their bloodstream so they scream for 4 hours straight. I plan on bringing my own flask.  

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind the occasional niece and nephew event, but not when they take up my whole weekend.  I like my quiet weekends with a glass of wine, good book, quality time with my dogs, cleaning my house, good movie or two.  If I wanted to run after 2 year old's all weekend I'd have one myself and get the tax reduction.  Sigh, I am really just not a kid person.


----------



## zima-cheryl

KirklandTutu said:


> I do make a mean chocolate martini, but it takes chambord and vodka with chocolate syrup.  mmmmmm



OK - all the ingrediants are in the kitchen... 
Are you mixing?  Or at least sharing the recipe?!?


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> I'll give a shout out - "Let's Go Flyers" - in the officers memory.
> 
> Please just tell me that the scumbag was killed during the robbery too?!?
> I hate the idea of wasting our tax $$ on a trial & jail time for a cop killer.



I forget if there were 2 or 3 of them??? I know one was shot and killed- they just found the other scumbag hiding out in an abandonded row home.


----------



## KirklandTutu

zima-cheryl said:


> OK - all the ingrediants are in the kitchen...
> Are you mixing?  Or at least sharing the recipe?!?



1 part GOOD vodka
1 part chambord
2 parts  chocolate syrup mixer (not normal chocolate syrup, get it in the drunk mixer isle)

shake with ice
rim glass with coco powder

enjoy!


----------



## PoohNTuck

Hey Everyone,

DH and I are taking a long weekend getaway to the Cape to celebrate our anniversary.  It's nice to be able to getaway when our schedules/$$ allow and not have any additional responsibilities to worry about.  

I've been in a kid-centric env at a work-related conference all week.  It's made me realize that if we had kids I'd feel the need to be there 24/7 with them and wouldn't have the heart to ever leave them.  Some of the propaganda makes me laugh.  Good parenting requires SO much more than most people can give.  It makes me realize how lightly most people take the job of having children.  While I'm a little annoyed by some of the judgmental remarks that have been made (La Leche League is one of the sponsors to give you some idea) I also wish more people had to take classes before they were given rights to parent.  The lack of awareness and the unrealistic expectations are shocking.  

I'm looking forward to my weekend at the beach.  Enjoy the great weather wherever you are!


----------



## TKDisneylover

PoohNTuck said:


> I also wish more people had to take classes before they were given rights to parent.  The lack of awareness and the unrealistic expectations are shocking.



I am in total agreement with this statement.  I cannot believe how many people let their kids run wild and a lot of times expect someone else to care for/watch their child.  Also, I work at Human Services and it is amazing the amount of grandparents who are caring for their grandchildren because the parents are off doing everything else "except" parenting their child.  It's sad, I feel so sorry for them.  During the years they should be enjoying their retirement they are raising kids all over again.

Have a great rest of the week everyone!  And enjoy your weekend at the beach PoohNTuck!


----------



## maddhatir

OH GOD CF PEEPS! I think only you, and few other of my DIS friends, can understand (and laugh) at what I just did!!!!!!!! I FEEL LIKE CRAP!!!

Here is the scoop....

My cousin's wife is pregnant. Well! he and I joke about everything and anything- NOTHING is sacred when we joke- NOTHING and NOBODY! He sent me an e-mail today telling me his wife went for an ultrasound and it is a 50% chance it is a girl, he is such a dork....

anyway- I then get an e-mail with the ultrasound pics- in one pic, the baby has it's mouth wide open- and is facing the "camera" so, of course, me, being ME- I write back.....

This is what I wrote back in my e-mail- word for word. 

_And the one with it's little mouth open- I think I saw a sketch of that on SciFi- it was a show about alien abductions! People swear that is what the being looked like that abducted them!!!  HAAAAA! Kidding, just a little......hee hee._

and....I hit send....and guess what???







THE PICS WERE FROM HIS WIFE NOT HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!    

They have almost identical e-mail addresses and I only looked at it for a second and thought it was from him!

OMG- I had to e-mail her back and tell her to pass on the msg to her husband, I told her my msg to her was.......OOOOOO, How cute! 

I feel so bad- b/c I do not think she thinks we are as funny as we do when we bust on each other  


It sounds like something Elaine would do in a Seinfeld episode


----------



## zima-cheryl

KirklandTutu said:


> 1 part GOOD vodka
> 1 part chambord
> 2 parts  chocolate syrup mixer (not normal chocolate syrup, get it in the drunk mixer isle)
> 
> shake with ice
> rim glass with coco powder
> 
> enjoy!



I'm still recouping from having wisdom teeth pulled earlier this week   
but as soon as I'm off the meds I think DH is going to be doing some drink mixing for me!  Thanks for the recipe.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Anyone still out there??  
Things have been awfully quiet here the past week.

Anyone w/big plans for the holiday weekend?
We are celebrating my folks 40th wedding anniversary.  Their gift to themselves is a 7 day Alaska cruise.  _Sweet_!  (Wonder if I could stow away in a suit case?  )


----------



## PhotobearSam

We open our summer business this weekend...I am so tired already.


----------



## maddhatir

Hi!

No big plans for us and that is fine with me! I am not one to run down the shore just b/c it is a holiday! I would rather stay away from the crowds.

Tomorrow- DH is going to start working on the back porch that was added last fall and he never got to finish it. 

I have to see if there are any yard sales- usually on a holiday weekend there are not too many around- and I have to plant my impatients that have been sitting here since last weekend- I could not plant them b/c all week it has been raining or freezing out!

I am HOPING to go for a cycle ride on Sunday to New Hope PA (our home away from home) b/c it is supposed to be beautiful here- but I have a feeling he will want to work on the porch some more. 

And Monday We go to the most stupid parade ever - It is in the tiny town I grew up in, but it is tradition that a bunch of us meet there and watch the parade (don't blink or you might miss it!), follow the parade to the local cemetery where they pay tribute to the fallen service men/women and then off to the American Legion for free hot dogs and soda (none for me thanks!) 

And after they all eat hot dogs- we have to go to lunch/breakfast at the diner. 

Every year we do the same thing on Memorial Day. Some of my friends actually come home from wherever they may be for the weekend just to meet up for our tradition. 

If anyone else asks us to do something Memorial Day Monday- we say "_Can't_! Gotta go to the parade!"


----------



## Clotho

Just joined the thread. Another childless by choice (at least for now). We are open to our feelings changing, but right now we are 33 and 34 and still not feeling a thing. Our friends are all having kids around us, at an alarming rate, and it isn't sparking a thing. If anything, quite the opposite.

I used to say one of my major goals in life was to be a Mom. When we got married, we were on the 5-year-plan, both enthusiastic about having a family together.  We got a couple pups, who we adore, and called them "baby practice". But instead, they kinda became "child replacement". I also teach dance to adults, and though they aren't "kids", the nurturing relationship with them feeds that need in many ways, I am sure.  So...no instincts to have kids kicking in.

Anywho, wanted to say hello.

And plans for the weekend? I was supposed to perform at a local arts festival, but got severe food poisoning while on a trip last weekend and landed in the ER. So I will be home recovering, and hopefully placing an order for our Ikea kitchen we are going to be creating!


----------



## maddhatir

Clotho said:


> Anywho, wanted to say hello.
> 
> And plans for the weekend? I was supposed to perform at a local arts festival, but got severe food poisoning while on a trip last weekend and landed in the ER. So I will be home recovering, and hopefully placing an order for our Ikea kitchen we are going to be creating!



 Ugh! Hope you are feeling better soon! Maybe you can cook your own meals when you get your new kitchen and stay out of the ER  

....and welcome to the thread!


----------



## PhotobearSam

Clotho said:


> Just joined the thread. Another childless by choice (at least for now). We are open to our feelings changing, but right now we are 33 and 34 and still not feeling a thing. Our friends are all having kids around us, at an alarming rate, and it isn't sparking a thing. If anything, quite the opposite.
> 
> I used to say one of my major goals in life was to be a Mom. When we got married, we were on the 5-year-plan, both enthusiastic about having a family together.  We got a couple pups, who we adore, and called them "baby practice". But instead, they kinda became "child replacement". I also teach dance to adults, and though they aren't "kids", the nurturing relationship with them feeds that need in many ways, I am sure.  So...no instincts to have kids kicking in.
> 
> Anywho, wanted to say hello.





Welcome

It is always nice to have more friends join this group...Wish we all lived closer so we could all really hang out...Too many of our friends are on the baby train right now.

I hope you are feeling better soon...Also, IKEA rocks.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

Clotho said:


> Anywho, wanted to say hello.
> 
> And plans for the weekend? I was supposed to perform at a local arts festival, but got severe food poisoning while on a trip last weekend and landed in the ER. So I will be home recovering, and hopefully placing an order for our Ikea kitchen we are going to be creating!




WELCOME!!!! Always good to have another CF person around...I have to agree that Ikea rocks!!! Hope you are feeling better!!


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Welcome
> 
> Too many of our friends are on the *baby train *right now.



Hi Peeps! Goess what? Today, I woke up 12:15.....PM!!!!!! I have not been sleeping well lately, but OMG- 12:15!!!? I am now wide awake! 

Worked in the yard all day long until about 7pm! Planted my impatients- some basil, cilantro, put in a few more morning glories......I still need to do so much more- But I have a rose blooming! I just planted my rose bushes about a month ago and I have so many buds- and one is opening!- small things make me happy 

OH and speaking of HAPPY!- I though maybe some of you CF gals might want to hear about my JD dream I had the other night.....NOT one of the _goodie_ dreams, but not a bad one either....

_I was somewhere, like a school or something and he was there to to give cooking lessons I think. I was sitting down and there was someone in front of me, and JD was talking, but he was RIGHT THERE to my left, SO close to me that I can feel the warmth of his face and his voice was right in my ear. He was then leaning up talking to the person in front of me and as he was leaning forward his arm was on my leg and I can feel how warm his arm was.....and lastley.....I was getting a pic taken with him and (MyGoofy26, my wench friend- I have to go and tell her) was on his left, I was on his right and she kissed his cheek and I was like- H%$# yeah!!- I wanna kiss his cheek too- so I did and I can feel his face was warm and and stubbly............

It was just weird that the whole dream was about "feeling" and closeness. Hmmmmm............Hey- I will take whatever dream I can get with JD in it!_

And Sam.......these are for you (but everyone can take a peeky!)

I likey the sweat 










And these 2, he just looks like he needs to be jumping on a Harely looking like this! Love the beard!


----------



## PhotobearSam

So yummy!!!! Love me some Johnny,


I had a weird dream that maybe some of you can help me translate.


My parents own a motorhome and in my dream, they met some people while on vacation and these people were coming to our home town so Dad asked them to stay at my parents' place. All was fine until this couple showed up with 2 teenagers and a boa constrictor.  My Mom is terrified of snakes (she can even look at a pic of a snake) so I tell her that these people can stay at our motel.

So I go over to our motel and open up a room for them and to my surprise, there is a HUGE copier machine in the room. Now I was mortified but they did not seem to care. Then I woke up.

Now, WHAT on earth could that mean? 

The best part is that we don't have a copy machine...we are a small summer business...We would have no use for it. I have a 3 in one printer that I use...


I will take any suggestions to what this means...anyone want to guess????


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> I will take any suggestions to what this means...anyone want to guess????




I am SO bad at interpreting dreams! They never mean what you think!

I used to have a dream books- but I always thought they were BS 

Try Googling "dream interpretation" maybe that will help!


----------



## PoohNTuck

Had a great trip.  It's official- DH loves the Cape.  Blew through a lot of cash at those roadside snack bars getting small meals.  So easy to overpay for stuff-- esp when you're hungry!  OUCH!

But we had a great time and now it's back to work the entire weekend. Holiday, what holiday?  Ah, weekend workers unite.

When I was reading the posts from the past week I realized, I have a confession to make- I've never been to Ikea.  I've seen the website.  But never been inside one.  Also, I went to my first Trader Joe's last week when we were away.  Had never seen one before- only heard about them from others.  I'm so deprived.


----------



## maddhatir

Just ordered a new CD from Best Buy!! Anyone else out there LOVIN' Type O Negative??? I think some of you more mellow metal fans can get into this band! They are goth, a bit dark, and believe I heard somehwere they refer to themselves as vampires .........- but STILL awesome! 

...and.....OMG- Peter's voice sends me screaming like a little school girl!!!! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	





http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fX6hV1kuWg&NR=1

Where is that girl who's name is something like, drummersmask, I think it is????

And where the heck is Hix????


----------



## JCandKT

hey all, 
jc and i finally booked our september trip.
it's the first time we'll be staying at the bc the entire week (the last time we went we only spent our last night and fell in love.)  we're used to staying at the as or pop, so we feel like this will be a completely different trip.

we want this trip to be different... we want to actually DO things.  we've never done fantasmic or actually have never been to any of the parades.  (i know i know it's crazy you say)

suggestions on MUST DO type things that you all can suggest?


----------



## Clotho

We have never done Fantasmic at WDW or parades, either.  For us, those are "leisure time" things to commit to. Stuff that will always be there, and take up a large amount of time, between not only the show, but also the waiting in LINE!  We are coming for our third trip, and hope to finally hit the WDW Fantasmic this time as well.

Have you seen Hoop Dee Doo Revue!?  WE LOVE IT!


----------



## TKDisneylover

PhotobearSam said:


> I will take any suggestions to what this means...anyone want to guess????



Important news is on the way.



PoohNTuck said:


> Had a great trip.  It's official- DH loves the Cape.  Blew through a lot of cash at those roadside snack bars getting small meals.  So easy to overpay for stuff-- esp when you're hungry!  OUCH!
> 
> But we had a great time and now it's back to work the entire weekend. Holiday, what holiday?  Ah, weekend workers unite.
> 
> When I was reading the posts from the past week I realized, I have a confession to make- I've never been to Ikea.  I've seen the website.  But never been inside one.  Also, I went to my first Trader Joe's last week when we were away.  Had never seen one before- only heard about them from others.  I'm so deprived.



DH and I have always wanted to take a road trip out East.  I've heard fall is a great time to go, especially for child free peeps!  Isn't it crazy how expensive food can be when your vacationing?!

We've also never been to Ikea, it's south of the border for us, which is really only about 45-60 min. away.  My DSis goes there and we keep saying we're going to tag along and never do.  Been to Trader Joe's once in Madison, WI a long time ago.

Glad to hear you had a great trip!



maddhatir said:


> Just ordered a new CD from Best Buy!! Anyone else out there LOVIN' Type O Negative??? I think some of you more mellow metal fans can get into this band! They are goth, a bit dark, and believe I heard somehwere they refer to themselves as vampires .........- but STILL awesome!



Interesting group!  The video reminded me of the old vampire flicks (obviously that's what they were going for), definitely entertaining.  I honestly think I'm becoming an old fart, I cannot get into the heavier groups anymore.  I still enjoy hearing some old Metallica now and then but more recently I've been listening to Matisyahu.  For those who have not heard of him, he's a hisidic jewish reggae rapper/beat boxer.  He's very interesting to watch on stage as he wears authentic jewish clothing and he has the long jewish style beard.  He will be performing this year at Summerfest (2-week music fest in Milwaukee- www.summerfest.com I can't wait to see him.



JCandKT said:


> we want this trip to be different... we want to actually DO things.  we've never done fantasmic or actually have never been to any of the parades.  (i know i know it's crazy you say)
> 
> suggestions on MUST DO type things that you all can suggest?



Definitely check out Fantasmic!  DH and I always catch this show and typically do the Fantasmic dinner package.  With the dinner package you don't have to wait in a long line, they give you your ticket at your dinner and you be at a specific gate just before the show begins.  And we typically do not plan to see parades either, when we do see one it's because it was in progress when we were passing through.  Have you seen Illuminations?  That one is good too if you have not seen it, it's a must do for us each visit.

Have a great Memorial Day everyone!


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## Clotho

TKDisneylover said:


> Definitely check out Fantasmic!  DH and I always catch this show and typically do the Fantasmic dinner package.  With the dinner package you don't have to wait in a long line, they give you your ticket at your dinner and you be at a specific gate just before the show begins.



We wanted to do this last year, but it turned out we had to eat dinner at some ungodly early (for us) hour. The reservations for dinner were at 5:30 for the 8pm Fantasmic!  We couldn't do it. We usually eat at 10:30pm at home (I get done teaching at 10pm three nights a week, and can't eat before I dance, so...), and around 8pm when on vacation and free from usual scheduling. So 5:30 is way too early for us!


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## maddhatir

JCandKT said:


> suggestions on MUST DO type things that you all can suggest?



MUST do the Segway Tour!!! 

DH and I did it for the first time in 2006 and it was AWESOME!!! At first I was a little scared I would not be a ble to control the darn thing- but OMG- it is SO easy- you will be buzzing aroung in no time!

I was fun to be in the World Showcase with no one else around too!

MAKE SURE you go to the Adventurers Club- that is a MUST DO! Be sure to get a nice buzz- that adds to the whole experience


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## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> DH and I have always wanted to take a road trip out East.  I've heard fall is a great time to go, especially for child free peeps!  Isn't it crazy how expensive food can be when your vacationing?!



I love living on the East Coast! It is so beautiful in the fall! DH and I have been to Newport (The Mansions are certainly something you have to experience once!) We spent the night in Cape Cod, then over to a B&B in Nantucket (my fave!) for a few days and we took the ferry over to Martha's Vineyard and rented a convertible Mustang for the day. 

We did them all in the fall and it was great b/c it was not too crowded.  I need to go back soon. 

Have you ever been to Savannah- that is beautiful too! We did Charleston SC however, we liked the small town feel of Savannah much more. 

You have to come to the East Coast! 



> Interesting group!  The video reminded me of the old vampire flicks (obviously that's what they were going for), definitely entertaining.  I honestly think I'm becoming an old fart, I cannot get into the heavier groups anymore.  I still enjoy hearing some old Metallica now and then but more recently I've been listening to Matisyahu.  For those who have not heard of him, he's a hisidic jewish reggae rapper/beat boxer.  He's very interesting to watch on stage as he wears authentic jewish clothing and he has the long jewish style beard.  He will be performing this year at Summerfest (2-week music fest in Milwaukee- www.summerfest.com I can't wait to see him.



OMG!!! THAT is a whole lotta music!!!! Now are you just going on June 30th to see Matisyahu (I have never heard of him- maybe *I* am the old one!!!) 

The ticket prices are not bad at all! Now I got all excited when I saw Drowning Pool (Let the Bodies hit the Floor!) was going to play the first day- kind of odd- they seem out of their element looking at the other bands. There is a big mix of music but not a lot of heavy stuff except Drowning Pool.

I would love to see Steve Miller and Joe Cocker! I like Indigenous and I like Lucinda Williams in a trashy kinda way 

Funny- I have never heard of the Jonas Brothers until today- my friend's daughter who is 11 made me listen to her IPod so I can hear them She said her entire IPod is filled with Christian rock bands, I was going to warn her that she may want to have the earpeices blessed after they were in my ears but I did not bring it up  All I can hear in my head was Regan's voice from the Exorcist- "_It's burns_!"


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## PoohNTuck

We saw Steve Miller last summer.  It was a great time.  Very fun loving concert with great music!

Also, agree that Savannah and Charleston are must dos if you travel to the lower east coast.  Both great cities.

Our late summer trip for my bday will either be Niagara Falls (Canada Side) or repeat trip to Charleston.  I'd REALLY love to do Disney and am seriously thinking about booking the package... but we'll see!  Really need another week to think this one over!


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## Barthy73

Hey everyone!  Hope all enjoyed a long weekend, at least those American's amongst us.

The Steve Miller Band puts on a great, great show!  I had the opportunity to see them about 10 years ago, and the show was excellent.  I particularly enjoyed the guitar Steve had made from the fender of a '57 Chevy! 

DW and I are fortunate to live close enough to drive to both Charleston and Savannah.  Both cities are wonderful to visit, and we're 3-4 hours from either.  We've only been to Charleston once and look forward to going back soon.  Savannah is always on our list of places to go for the weekend, but we've only made it twice.  Neither are particularly cheap, but deals can be had if you search.  We've stayed twice at the Savannah Westin Harbor hotel for about $125/night through Priceline.  These rooms typically go for $299 each.  Visiting either of these fine cities during the off season is highly suggested.

Have a great week everyone!


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## maddhatir

Whenever DH and I travel to places such as Savannah, Charleston, Rhode Island- even if we are only going to PA 45 minutes away- we stay @ B&Bs!

 I am a freak and do reseach on the internet as to which place in town is haunted!

I was calling around one time for prices (I forget where we were going) and I asked if their Inn was haunted- the woman was a little shocked 

When we were in Charleston, we stayed at the Battery Carriage House- it was featured on the History Channel's Haunted History series! It was beautiful- but we did not have any "experiences"

We also stayed @ The Logan Inn in New Hope PA- that is another "hot spot" I did have some creepies there!

My poor DH- I make his life....a little dramatic He is so darn laid back, and me, well, I am not sure what the heck I am


















That sums me up in a few smilies


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## maddhatir

OMG you guys! I was just listening to Hard Attack (what's new) and I heard this crazy, sick, twisted version of _The Doors Roadhouse Blues_ done by _Ministry_! 

It is some crazy stuff- it really gets you boppin'! I don't think anyone can hate this!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2F4a5EL8Tbc


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## zima-cheryl

JCandKT said:


> hey all,
> jc and i finally booked our september trip.
> it's the first time we'll be staying at the bc the entire week (the last time we went we only spent our last night and fell in love.)  we're used to staying at the as or pop, so we feel like this will be a completely different trip.
> 
> we want this trip to be different... we want to actually DO things.  we've never done fantasmic or actually have never been to any of the parades.  (i know i know it's crazy you say)
> 
> suggestions on MUST DO type things that you all can suggest?



My favorite suggestion is the carriage ride @ Fort Wilderness.  We did that & timed it to when the fireworks were @ MK so you could catch glimpses of the them through the trees.  

It was a real treat & very romantic!   

Also - what about a cruise?  I'm hoping for my 40th birthday next year that DH will spring for an Illuminations cruise for me!  I believe they also do Wishes cruises.  Has anyone else done the cruises?  I think it would be a lot of fun.


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## zima-cheryl

PoohNTuck said:


> We saw Steve Miller last summer.  It was a great time.  Very fun loving concert with great music!
> 
> Also, agree that Savannah and Charleston are must dos if you travel to the lower east coast.  Both great cities.
> 
> Our late summer trip for my bday will either be Niagara Falls (Canada Side) or repeat trip to Charleston.  I'd REALLY love to do Disney and am seriously thinking about booking the package... but we'll see!  Really need another week to think this one over!



Ditto on Charleston!!  Charleston is one of my favorite towns.  Well worth a long weekend.

Savannah & Niagara Falls were great too!  I'd also recommend Cleveland, OH; Bar Harbor, Maine or Philladelphia, PA for a weekend get away.  And if you enjoy gambling the resort casinos in Connecticut are a lot of fun.  We manage an overnight at Mohegan Sun at least once a year!  

I'm hoping next year for either Memorial Day or Labor Day weekend that we can get to Memphis (got to see Graceland!   )

That is one *BIG *perk about being child free is all the travel we manage to do!  When we made the decision to be child free we also resolved to be sure & totally enjoy the lifestyle.  Last thing I wanted was to have all this disposable income & free time and be sitting on my butt at home doing nothing.


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## Chris Rex

Haven't been here for awhile, but we recently booked a visit in Sept and I thought I would pop back and check in with my favorite thread!

How is everyone in the glorious land of child-free? 

-C Rex


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## TKDisneylover

Clotho said:


> We wanted to do this last year, but it turned out we had to eat dinner at some ungodly early (for us) hour. The reservations for dinner were at 5:30 for the 8pm Fantasmic!  We couldn't do it. We usually eat at 10:30pm at home (I get done teaching at 10pm three nights a week, and can't eat before I dance, so...), and around 8pm when on vacation and free from usual scheduling. So 5:30 is way too early for us!



Check with the times schedule during your visiting dates, sometimes they will have a late Fantasmic, which in turn you could book a later dinner.  We did that during our visit this past December, there were a lot less kids, and a lot of empty seats during this particular Fantasmic also.  Or you could see the 8:00 Fantasmic (which is not as crowded as I mentioned aboved), coming into the theatre last minute (as I said above, lots of empty seats) and eat a later dinner at the Boardwalk or head to Downtown Disney for dinner.  Good luck, and I hope you can fit it into your visit!


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## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Have you ever been to Savannah- that is beautiful too! We did Charleston SC however, we liked the small town feel of Savannah much more.
> 
> You have to come to the East Coast!
> 
> No, we have never been to Savannah either, But it's another on our list of places to visit.  Someday we will get there.....
> 
> 
> OMG!!! THAT is a whole lotta music!!!! Now are you just going on June 30th to see Matisyahu (I have never heard of him- maybe *I* am the old one!!!)
> 
> The ticket prices are not bad at all! Now I got all excited when I saw Drowning Pool (Let the Bodies hit the Floor!) was going to play the first day- kind of odd- they seem out of their element looking at the other bands. There is a big mix of music but not a lot of heavy stuff except Drowning Pool.
> 
> I would love to see Steve Miller and Joe Cocker! I like Indigenous and I like Lucinda Williams in a trashy kinda way
> 
> Funny- I have never heard of the Jonas Brothers until today- my friend's daughter who is 11 made me listen to her IPod so I can hear them She said her entire IPod is filled with Christian rock bands, I was going to warn her that she may want to have the earpeices blessed after they were in my ears but I did not bring it up  All I can hear in my head was Regan's voice from the Exorcist- "_It's burns_!"




We actually have vacation time scheduled during the entire Summerfest.  That is typically what a lot of people in this area do because the prices are so reasonable.  They will soon be putting out daily promotions for free entry like bringing in two ice cream tub tops from a specific brand(you know, the lid of the ice cream container), or a HOG card (I'm sure you know what that is!), a Journal-Sentinel newspaper subscriber card, etc.  You have to arrive between noon & 3:00 to get in free with these promotional items.  And like you said the ticket prices are not bad, and they will also sell tickets in 2, 3 & 4 day packs at a discounted rate.  We still need to print out the schedule and map out our days that we will be attending.  Sometimes we will go in the early day, leave mid/late afternoon (they stamp your hand so you can return later for free), and come back for the late shows.  The place gets like a zoo at night time when all the big groups are playing, some people get a little out of hand with all the drinking (martini bar, wine bar, beer kiosks, etc.).  But the police do a great job of keeping people in line and difuse a situation before it's gets serious.  And with the groups that play the amphitheatre they will release so many "wrist bands" to get into the show free and sit in a grass seating area, we saw Steely Dan last year that way and really enjoyed the show.  They have large screens so you can still see the group and the sound is really good too.

And beware, Matisyahu is almost like Christian rock, only he sings about his faith of jewdaism (sp?), but it's the fact that he sings it with a great reggae beat and he is truly a good beat boxer (IMHO).  I'm not a religious person myself but I do enjoy the music.  I have such an eclectic taste is music, it's crazy!

If you ever visit Wisconsin, do so during this time of year, there is so much going on!


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## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> or a HOG card (I'm sure you know what that is!)



I am a card carrying HOG (member)! 




> The place gets like a zoo at night time when all the big groups are playing, some people get a little out of hand with all the drinking (martini bar, wine bar, beer kiosks, etc.).  But the police do a great job of keeping people in line and difuse a situation before it's gets serious.



I know what you mean about out of hand- There are so many times I want to go to one of the all day concerts like The "Family Values" tour with Korn and some other awesome bands- but I do not feel like dealing with the drunks- and young drunks are even worse- 

I really want to see Disturbed, Mastodon, Slip Knot (and even Dragonforce is not bad) this summer during the Mayhem Tour- but I do not feel like dealing with people for a long period of time So maybe I will time it right to get to see the bands I want to see- b/c I really want to go. Maybe I will pop a few Ativan and forget anyone is around me! Can you say social anxiety! 



> And beware, Matisyahu is almost like Christian rock, only he sings about his faith of jewdaism (sp?), but it's the fact that he sings it with a great reggae beat and he is truly a good beat boxer (IMHO).  I'm not a religious person myself but I do enjoy the music.  I have such an eclectic taste is music, it's crazy!



 I started cracking up when I read this- Beware! Thanks for the heads up. DH likes reggae- I used to. We saw Ziggy once a few years back.

But I am SOOOO not into anything that sounds like rap! (except Anthrax ) I can't do it.

My music taste can go from Death, Black, thrash metal, to the old school thrash, But 10 minutes later you can find me listening to Baroque. I am picky about my classical too- has to be Baroque- love Vivaldi!

This might throw you- I also like Enya, Loreena McKennitt, Sinead O'Connor, Natalie Merchant and get this....sometimes- Jewel!  

But no- rap, country, top 40


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## PhotobearSam

zima-cheryl said:


> Also - what about a cruise?  I'm hoping for my 40th birthday next year that DH will spring for an Illuminations cruise for me!  I believe they also do Wishes cruises.  Has anyone else done the cruises?  I think it would be a lot of fun.





I have done both. I did the Wishes cruise with some DISers and they made it a Birthday Cruise for my friend that was with us. It was nice but the ILLUMINATIONS cruise was the BEST!!!

I loved it and so did my hubby...I surprised him with it.


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## WDWguru

I agree with Samantha... Illuminations. We've done both multiple times and the Illuminations cruise is more intimate - you are much closer to the show and in a much smaller area. In fact, try to get the Breathless if you can. It's the old replica Cris Craft that you see docked at the Yacht Club marina. We've taken that twice and it's awesome! There is only room for I think 7 people tops (there are three seating areas that will seat 2 or 3 in each), but I'd definitely pick that for just two people. The Breathless does go in for refurb often and there is only one, so it's tough to get, but if you call right when they open at the 90 day mark you should be able to get it.


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## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I am a freak and do reseach on the internet as to which place in town is haunted!
> 
> I was calling around one time for prices (I forget where we were going) and I asked if their Inn was haunted- the woman was a little shocked
> 
> When we were in Charleston, we stayed at the Battery Carriage House- it was featured on the History Channel's Haunted History series! It was beautiful- but we did not have any "experiences"
> 
> We also stayed @ The Logan Inn in New Hope PA- that is another "hot spot" I did have some creepies there!



You must be a Ghost Hunters (Sci-Fi) fan then?



maddhatir said:


> My music taste can go from Death, Black, thrash metal, to the old school thrash, But 10 minutes later you can find me listening to Baroque. I am picky about my classical too- has to be Baroque- love Vivaldi!
> 
> This might throw you- I also like Enya, Loreena McKennitt, Sinead O'Connor, Natalie Merchant and get this....sometimes- Jewel!
> 
> But no- rap, country, top 40



I think we had discussed our like for Vivaldi once before, he is my fav in the world of baroque.  DH and I are big RUSH fans (I know, you either love them or you hate them.), we are hoping to get last minute ticket releases the day of the show during Summerfest.  The box office will release seats that were reserved for equipment space, you can get some really great seats this way.  I enjoy all the ladies you mentioned above also, and for me add in Shirley Manson from Garbage, Sophie B. Hawkins and a little Patti Rothberg.

Then we really enjoy classic rock, the Doors (loved the metal version by the way.  The old film clips were awesome, I've never seen those particular ones.), Steely Dan, Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young, and the rest of the 70's era.  I always thought I was born a little late, I would have love to have gone to Woodstock.  Now mix in some ethnic music, Reggae (Bob of course & Jimmy Cliff), Mexican (Mariachi is my fav, check out Mana if you ever get a chance, they are the Mexican version of The Police).  My co-worker is on vacation today & tomorrow (we share an office and listen to the "moldy-Oldy" station normally), ahhhh but today I can listen to everything I've got downloaded into my computer, which is lots, totally SWEET! 

Have a great day everyone!


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## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> You must be a Ghost Hunters (Sci-Fi) fan then?



Always been a "ghost fan" I may have mentioned it here before- sorry- I can't remember who I tell what to I used to be in a "paranormal" group out of Philly- 

I went on a few investigations- one was overnight at Fort Mifflin in PA- but I did not like it much b/c it seemed too technical- I like the whole hunting idea- but with the meters and cameras and the reports we had to write- it just took the fun out of it. I will stick to ghost hunting on my own!



> I think we had discussed our like for Vivaldi once before, he is my fav in the world of baroque.  DH and I are big RUSH fans (I know, you either love them or you hate them.)



Sorry about repeating myself-  I was never a Rush fan- I DO love their song though, I think it is called "Trees"??? 



> Then we really enjoy classic rock, the Doors (loved the metal version by the way.



YES! I forgot to mention Classic Rock- Jimi is god! and some of the Blues are good.

You know what is really cool music, but not sure how to find it- or what genre it would be? 

Has anyone seen the movie-_ The Skeleton Key _with Kate Hudson?? She plays the record of Papa Jusitfy (That name is just way TOO awesome! Someone please name a pet after him- I am allergic and will never have any...maybe I can get a fish and name his Papa Justify! ) and that crazy voodoo stuff and it is so haunting, all scratched up and creepy- I LOVE it! 

I tried searching on Live 365 things like, bayou, New Orleans, blues- but just can't find it- I also checked the credits at the end of the movie for any info- I couldn't find anything- I am usually a good investigator


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## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I went on a few investigations- one was overnight at Fort Mifflin in PA- but I did not like it much b/c it seemed too technical- I like the whole hunting idea- but with the meters and cameras and the reports we had to write- it just took the fun out of it. I will stick to ghost hunting on my own!



Very cool!  DH and I would love to get into doing that, however we do like the idea of EVP's.  DH wants to try this sometime, plus he wants to buy some type of meter for hot & cold spots.  But I agree with you about all the technical stuff, it can take the fun out of ghost hunting.  Did you see the special about the Children of the Grave?  I thought they did a great job with it and the recording of the children playing/singing was remarkably eerie. 



> I think it is called "Trees"???



That is a great song.  We are old school RUSH fans going way back to Xanadu, and everything on 2112.



> YES! I forgot to mention Classic Rock- Jimi is god! and some of the Blues are good.



I agree, Jimi is god, however I also love Ian Astbury from the Cult.  I had heard some rumblings in the recent past that Robby Krieger & Ray Manzarek were making some plans to tour with him doing a Doors tunes.  I would love to see him perform Jimi's old tunes!  I love watching old Cult videos on You Tube and watching Ian sing.



> You know what is really cool music, but not sure how to find it- or what genre it would be?
> 
> Has anyone seen the movie-_ The Skeleton Key _with Kate Hudson?? She plays the record of Papa Jusitfy (That name is just way TOO awesome! Someone please name a pet after him- I am allergic and will never have any...maybe I can get a fish and name his Papa Justify! ) and that crazy voodoo stuff and it is so haunting, all scratched up and creepy- I LOVE it!
> 
> I tried searching on Live 365 things like, bayou, New Orleans, blues- but just can't find it- I also checked the credits at the end of the movie for any info- I couldn't find anything- I am usually a good investigator



I think the song your talking about is called "Conjure of Sacrifice" and it's only available on the Skeleton Key soundtrack.  DH and I thought that was a pretty good movie!  To age ourselves somemore, we are big Hellraiser fans, love me some Pinhead!  "I have such sights to show you."


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## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Very cool!  DH and I would love to get into doing that, however we do like the idea of EVP's.  DH wants to try this sometime, plus he wants to buy some type of meter for hot & cold spots.  But I agree with you about all the technical stuff, it can take the fun out of ghost hunting.  Did you see the special about the Children of the Grave?  I thought they did a great job with it and the recording of the children playing/singing was remarkably eerie.



I don't think I saw the show.......who did the show? What channel??

I bought a voice-activated tape recorder at a yard sale just for that very reason! I have not used it yet though- Imagine if I turn it on and leave it in our bedroom overnight .....and the next morning I go to listen and there is like, growling and stuff!!! 




> I think the song your talking about is called "Conjure of Sacrifice" and it's only available on the Skeleton Key soundtrack.  DH and I thought that was a pretty good movie!  To age ourselves somemore, we are big Hellraiser fans, love me some Pinhead!  "I have such sights to show you."



Oh Cool! I can check and see if they have a name or something that can lead me in the right direction for more info on the music! Thanks

......oh- and I remember seeing _Hellraiser_...in the theater- that is how old I am  

and to bring back some memories..... 

The one and only......


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## maddhatir

oh-no, I just did some Googling for the Conjure of Sacrfice.....and found this on a website about soundtracks..... 

_Q:  Does anyone know where I can get Papa's justify "Conjure of Sacrifice"? The record/LP version? (i.e. scratching sound, echoing voice). Thanks!  (from Nicole  in Canada ) 

A:  You're not going to find the "Conjure of Sacrifice" anywhere on LP, but it does appear on the soundtrack album... (thanks to Prue , HAUPPAUGE ) _

more info- ugh- it looks like it was just composed just for the movie.....

The Skeleton Key, film score Conjure of Sacrifice 

Composed by Edward Shearmur 
Performed by Hollywood Studio Symphony 
with Lyle Workman, George Doering, David Zasloff, Mike Fisher, Brian Kilgore, Charles Bisharat 
Conducted by Edward Shearm


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## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I don't think I saw the show.......who did the show? What channel??
> 
> I bought a voice-activated tape recorder at a yard sale just for that very reason! I have not used it yet though- Imagine if I turn it on and leave it in our bedroom overnight .....and the next morning I go to listen and there is like, growling and stuff!!!



The show was on Sci-Fi over a month or so ago, I think before the new Ghost Hunters season began.  It was about the lost children of American orphanages.  Apparently they found all these unmarked graves and also found mass graves with childrens bones in them.  It was a very interesting show.  I'm sure you could Google it.

I know what you mean about hearing sounds in your own home, I have the same fear.  Only because we had found out after we bought our home that the previous owner had died in the house and was not found for over a week.  When we started talking to our neighbors on both sides of our house they both confirmed that they hadn't seen him in a while and one of them finally contacted his family.  They found him in our now guest room dead from a heart attack.  His name was "Harry Johnson" , anyway he was a heavy smoker (we're still trying to get the yellow color out of our white brick fireplace).  Occassionally I will smell the strong smell of cigarette smoke, like someone just lit a one.  Now DH & I are ex-smokers so we know that smell well.  I'm always sure to say hello to Harry when I smell it cuz I figure lightin' up from the beyond. 



maddhatir said:


> oh-no, I just did some Googling for the Conjure of Sacrfice.....and found this on a website about soundtracks.....
> 
> _Q:  Does anyone know where I can get Papa's justify "Conjure of Sacrifice"? The record/LP version? (i.e. scratching sound, echoing voice). Thanks!  (from Nicole  in Canada )
> 
> A:  You're not going to find the "Conjure of Sacrifice" anywhere on LP, but it does appear on the soundtrack album... (thanks to Prue , HAUPPAUGE ) _
> 
> more info- ugh- it looks like it was just composed just for the movie.....
> 
> The Skeleton Key, film score Conjure of Sacrifice
> 
> Composed by Edward Shearmur
> Performed by Hollywood Studio Symphony
> with Lyle Workman, George Doering, David Zasloff, Mike Fisher, Brian Kilgore, Charles Bisharat
> Conducted by Edward Shearm



Yep, that looks like the same place I got the info from.  I had entered "music from the movie Skeleton Key and that's what came up.  I'm sure you will have no problem getting that soundtrack.  

By the way, thank for the pic of Pinhead.  Now that I think about it, this weekend would be perfect to watch a couple Hellraiser movies.  We have the first two movies in a box set, and then the third we recorded from pay tv.  There are a total of I think 7 Hellraiser sequels, unfortunately after the 3rd they get pretty lame.  The second one is pretty good as it features a lot of the same actors from the first movie.  IMHO Clive Barker did a great job with the 2nd sequel.  Check it out if you get a chance, or better yet watch both back to back because the storyline continues perfectly.


----------



## JCandKT

Thanks all!

We'll definitely have to book a Fantasmic dinner package... I don't want to wait in line!  (Although, we usually eat pretty late too... so we'll have to see what kind of times we're talking about here.)  I'm excited to see it!

We have seen Illuminations... but I think only once.  It'll be nice since we're staying at the Beach Club and we'll be right there.  Any suggestions on where to stand?

I'll look into the carriage ride at Ft. Wilderness - thanks!!

Man... I'm realizing as I'm planning this trip that we really haven't done much at all when we've been at WDW.  I feel like a slug!  Usually our trips have been only 4 nights... and this one will be a bit longer.  And with switching resorts... it'll be like a whole new world.  

As soon as the 90-day-mark hits I'll start making reservations... Ohana, Cape May... we usually do a breakfast at Chef Mickey... and I'll look into more information about the Illuminations Cruise.

Thanks all!


----------



## zima-cheryl

JCandKT said:


> As soon as the 90-day-mark hits I'll start making reservations... Ohana, Cape May... we usually do a breakfast at Chef Mickey... and I'll look into more information about the Illuminations Cruise.
> 
> Thanks all!



If you are looking for good food I'd recommend Le Cellier (in Canada @ Epcot) which is a steak house.  And don't pass up Morocco...the food there is fantastic!


----------



## Clotho

JCandKT said:


> As soon as the 90-day-mark hits I'll start making reservations... Ohana, Cape May... we usually do a breakfast at Chef Mickey... and I'll look into more information about the Illuminations Cruise.



Don't you mean 180 Day? Or did I miss something?


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> And don't pass up Morocco...the food there is fantastic!



DH & I totally agree on this one.  The food was great, the music was great and DH really liked the belly dancer!  She was pulling kids from the crowd, but the dad's were getting in on it too!  Very entertaining and delish too!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> DH & I totally agree on this one.  The food was great, the music was great and DH really liked the belly dancer!  She was pulling kids from the crowd, but the dad's were getting in on it too!  Very entertaining and delish too!



Has anyone ever seen Mo'Rockin perform outside of Morocco! They are really good- and the belly dancer is the singer (Its not the belly dancer from the restaurant though) and she throws in a little dancin' too!


----------



## Clotho

There is a bellydancer separate from the singer, as well, who dances with Mo'Rockin' sometimes.

As a bellydancer myself, I can tell you those dancers really are great. Try to get a seat near the dancefloor for the best view!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Has anyone ever seen Mo'Rockin perform outside of Morocco! They are really good- and the belly dancer is the singer (Its not the belly dancer from the restaurant though) and she throws in a little dancin' too!



I've never seen them perform at all unfortunately.  I have only seen the two men inside the restaurant performing & the dancer.  We just missed Mo'Rockin getting ready to play or they were between songs and the belly dancer was dancing.  We were heading out of the park so we were not able to stay and watch.

On another subject, did you see Haunted Hotels on the Travel Channel this morning?  They highlighted a hotel in Lenox, Mass called the Whistler's Inn that is supposed to be haunted.  They have a really old cemetary right across the street from the Inn.  Supposedly people standing in the cemetary can see shadows in the windows of the Inn and experiences of cold spots in the attic.  Just an FYI.


----------



## maddhatir

Clotho said:


> There is a bellydancer separate from the singer, as well, who dances with Mo'Rockin' sometimes.
> 
> As a bellydancer myself, I can tell you those dancers really are great. Try to get a seat near the dancefloor for the best view!



Wow! Cool! You are a belly dancer??! 



TKDisneylover said:


> On another subject, did you see Haunted Hotels on the Travel Channel this morning?  They highlighted a hotel in Lenox, Mass called the Whistler's Inn that is supposed to be haunted.  They have a really old cemetary right across the street from the Inn.  Supposedly people standing in the cemetary can see shadows in the windows of the Inn and experiences of cold spots in the attic.  Just an FYI.



No- I did not see it- I know a lot them are repeats that I already saw- that is how I got the idea to stay at the Battery Carriage House- I like the shows on the History Channel- they are not as corny as some.....


----------



## Clotho

Yes, I teach and perform Tribal Style Bellydance  Different style than you see the dancers at the Moroccan pavilion, but bellydance nonetheless.
http://www.mandalatribal.com - my classes
http://www.infusiontribal.com - my pro troupe
http://www.tribalbellydance.org - an informational resource I created


----------



## WDWAliens

My DH and I have would love to try to book the Breathless for our trip in November, do you remember how much is was to rent?


WDWguru said:


> I agree with Samantha... Illuminations. We've done both multiple times and the Illuminations cruise is more intimate - you are much closer to the show and in a much smaller area. In fact, try to get the Breathless if you can. It's the old replica Cris Craft that you see docked at the Yacht Club marina. We've taken that twice and it's awesome! There is only room for I think 7 people tops (there are three seating areas that will seat 2 or 3 in each), but I'd definitely pick that for just two people. The Breathless does go in for refurb often and there is only one, so it's tough to get, but if you call right when they open at the 90 day mark you should be able to get it.


----------



## maddhatir

WDWAliens said:


> My DH and I have would love to try to book the Breathless for our trip in November, do you remember how much is was to rent?



I found this on Allears......

http://www.allearsnet.com/btp/illum.htm


----------



## Donald's Fan in PHX!

Hey, this look like the spot...Just wanted to say HI  . My wife and I have been married for 6 years this Aug and still kid free lol.


----------



## kimis

Welcome to a fellow valley of the sun (and heat)!   I am excited to see someone so close here on the boards.  My dh and I have been married 33 years and we celebrate every year at WDW.  We have 3 sons, 3 faboulous daughter in laws ( I hate the term "in laws) and 5 grandchildren.  We actually have 3 more grandkids due this year.  I know this is the site for marrieds chosing not have kids and that is cool.  I was just telling you about us.  Enjoy


----------



## maddhatir

Donald's Fan in PHX! said:


> Hey, this look like the spot...Just wanted to say HI  . My wife and I have been married for 6 years this Aug and still kid free lol.



Welcome!



kimis said:


> Welcome to a fellow valley of the sun (and heat)!   I am excited to see someone so close here on the boards.  My dh and I have been married 33 years and we celebrate every year at WDW.  We have 3 sons, 3 faboulous daughter in laws ( I hate the term "in laws) and 5 grandchildren.  We actually have 3 more grandkids due this year.  I know this is the site for marrieds chosing not have kids and that is cool.  I was just telling you about us.  Enjoy



I don't think adult kids count here  

Welcome- stay a while!


----------



## Donald's Fan in PHX!

awesome thanks everyone, and yes, current temp is 100


----------



## Clotho

kimis said:


> Welcome to a fellow valley of the sun (and heat)!   I am excited to see someone so close here on the boards.  My dh and I have been married 33 years and we celebrate every year at WDW.  We have 3 sons, 3 faboulous daughter in laws ( I hate the term "in laws) and 5 grandchildren.  We actually have 3 more grandkids due this year.  I know this is the site for marrieds chosing not have kids and that is cool.  I was just telling you about us.  Enjoy



I am curious why you chose to be a part of a thread devoted to "marrieds choosing not to have kids". Are we the sideshow freaks you came to watch?  *ribbing you*


----------



## maddhatir

Clotho said:


> I am curious why you chose to be a part of a thread devoted to "marrieds choosing not to have kids". Are we the sideshow freaks you came to watch?  *ribbing you*




WHO you callin' a freak


----------



## PhotobearSam

I'm a freak and proud of it!


----------



## Clotho

LOL! See, I knew I would fit in here!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Donald's Fan in PHX! said:


> Hey, this look like the spot...Just wanted to say HI  . My wife and I have been married for 6 years this Aug and still kid free lol.



 



PhotobearSam said:


> I'm a freak and proud of it!



DITTO!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

hey I"m proud to be a freak...and a nerd...but that's a whole 'nother thread...lol


----------



## Donald's Fan in PHX!

My wife would say Nerd works for me.   Fine by me, Disney, Xbox, and Sports...that sums me up.


----------



## Barthy73

No freaks here..  nerds, yes... dorks, definitely...   

But our dog loves us, and our neighbors love our bar.  LOL


----------



## zima-cheryl

Clotho said:


> Yes, I teach and perform Tribal Style Bellydance  Different style than you see the dancers at the Moroccan pavilion, but bellydance nonetheless.
> http://www.mandalatribal.com - my classes
> http://www.infusiontribal.com - my pro troupe
> http://www.tribalbellydance.org - an informational resource I created




Awesome!  I've been at it about 4 years now... still wonder which is my right or left foot some days!   
Too bad you are out on the "left coast"... I'd love to see your troupe.

Saana is my instructor. She teaches a more traditional style.  
http://www.sanaa-amel.com/

When we are at Epcot I must make DH take in every belly dance show of the day.  Poor guy is a good sport.  
As he says... why complain when your wife is dragging you off to watch a belly dancer?!?


----------



## LeesyUD

Wow I was so shocked to find this thread.  I couldn't believe how many people had the same feelings I do.  I am 27 and engaged and though I love kids and wanted them when I was younger, I have gotten into the real world and decided that I just don't want my own kids in my future.  Honestly alot of the reason is because I suffer from a form of Bipolar disorder and although I am described as "high functioning" I have had alot of severe depression and anxiety episodes and I just don't feel it would be right for me to bring a child into this world when I have these periods where I can not even take care of myself.  I think that if I didn't have that to deal with and I was in a better place with a career I would be much more likely to want to have kids, and a tiny ounce of me does still want them.  But for me I just know in my heart it is not right and not something I can handle.  I think there are so many people bringing kids into this world that cannot handle it emotionally or financially.  And I think that is something everyone should consider before having children.  I think it is important to make sure that you are prepared to do everything in the world to protect and provide for your children and that you have the means to do it.  I admittedly do not have the means.  So that is where I am at.  

Luckily I have a wonderful fiance who when I told him I did not want to have kids said "The most important thing for me is that I am with you.  If we ever decided having kids would be right for us then I think it would just be an extra bonus.  We could decide to never have kids and I would still be a happy man as long as I am with you."  That was music to my ears


----------



## Donald's Fan in PHX!

welcome


----------



## Donald's Fan in PHX!

Barthy73 said:


> No freaks here..  nerds, yes... dorks, definitely...
> 
> But our dog loves us, and our neighbors love our bar.  LOL



We love our nerdy dogs


----------



## LeesyUD

Donald's Fan in PHX! said:


> welcome



Thank you!  Your dogs are so cute, I love labs. I have had two golden retreivers though my 1 year old,  I got her with my dad while I had moved back with them for a while, but I had to leave her there bc she was more for my dad, but I got so attached, she is my baby.  I still consider her my dog too (I am officially a co owner woo hoo) but I still visit her all the time.  When my fiance and I get somewhere we are allowed to have dogs we have both agreed that it will be our "baby" and will be spoiled rotten.


----------



## maddhatir

Welcome Leesy!!!

And Steve, your dogs are adorable! I love the "superman" shot- you should photoshop a cape on the pup!!!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

LeesyUD said:


> Luckily I have a wonderful fiance who when I told him I did not want to have kids said "The most important thing for me is that I am with you.  If we ever decided having kids would be right for us then I think it would just be an extra bonus.  We could decide to never have kids and I would still be a happy man as long as I am with you."  That was music to my ears




WELCOME!!! and it sounds like you've got an AMAZING fiance!!


----------



## maddhatir

I have a few more "classic" song remakes by a few of _my _bands! 

If anyone is a Twisted Sister fan and loved the song "_Burn in He!!_" check this crazy remake by *Dimmu Borgir*!!

This is just a video someone made up on You Tube and put some random pics along with some Dimmu pics to the song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3IuzkGz9uD4


AND- any Neil Young fans?? How about a "_Cinnamon Girl_" remake from *Type O Negative *.......who I am ADDICTED to - that is the only CD I have in my player right now! 

UGH! It has been so long since a band has given me, goosebumps, chills, almost brings me to tears b/c of their sound, makes my heart do flip flops AND makes me just want to...... ALL AT ONCE just from any song they play! I can't beleive I have passed these guys by for so long! 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0bHCY865xs

.


----------



## TKDisneylover

LeesyUD said:


> Luckily I have a wonderful fiance who when I told him I did not want to have kids said "The most important thing for me is that I am with you.  If we ever decided having kids would be right for us then I think it would just be an extra bonus.  We could decide to never have kids and I would still be a happy man as long as I am with you."  That was music to my ears



   And who says there are not any good guys left in the world?  Sound like you got yourself a great one!



Donald's Fan in PHX! said:


> We love our nerdy dogs



I LOVE PET PICS!!!  Your two are so cute!  And I agree with maddhatir about the Superman one!


----------



## maddhatir

OMG I am FA-REAKING OUT! 

I just ordered tix for Type O Negative in Philly July 2nd!! I am screaming like a little school girl in my head!!!


----------



## LeesyUD

TKDisneylover said:


> And who says there are not any good guys left in the world?  Sound like you got yourself a great one!



Yea he is great, he is probably the most understanding and least judgmental guy I have ever meant.  Oh but boy are we both stubborn!  We bicker so much! But its ok cause usually it lasts like 2 seconds and then we are fine.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> OMG I am FA-REAKING OUT!
> 
> I just ordered tix for Type O Negative in Philly July 2nd!! I am screaming like a little school girl in my head!!!



Hey, congrats on the tix!  You are going to have so much fun!  How are you going to stand listening to that guys voice for for what, three hours or something?  Your DH is going to have to hold you up just to get you through it!

What kind of seats did you get?


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> OMG I am FA-REAKING OUT!
> 
> I just ordered tix for Type O Negative in Philly July 2nd!! I am screaming like a little school girl in my head!!!



ooh have fun Madd...they are going to be in Dallas this summer too...but I don't know if we'll go


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> ooh have fun Madd...they are going to be in Dallas this summer too...but I don't know if we'll go



 You like Type O???? I will let you know how the concert is and you can decide! 



TKDisneylover said:


> Hey, congrats on the tix!  You are going to have so much fun!  How are you going to stand listening to that guys voice for for what, three hours or something?  Your DH is going to have to hold you up just to get you through it!
> 
> What kind of seats did you get?



I will fainting all over the place > this is me 

This is me listening to Peter sing>>      

 

They are playing in a club- there are no "assigned" seating- first come first serve. But what is good about this place is, the upstairs is 21 and over b/c the bars are up there and all the seating is up there- the kidletts like to be on the floor anyway to mosh it up- but  not too sure about the crowd for this band.

They might be a little older since they have been around for years- and not sure of you can really mosh to this music- it think it will be more of a goth crowd- can't see the goths moshing, they might get some of their piercings caught up in something (I can say that w/o offending anyone b/c I have piercings- isn't that how it works?? )

I want to get there really early to get a good seat upstairs though. DH is gonna have to get the heck out of work early for this one! 

He took my Best of Type O CD this morning for the Jeep- he has the top down and I had to warn his not to blast the first song on the CD "_Unsuccessfully Coping With The Natural Beauty Of Infidelity_" b/c they cuss and it is kind of a nasty song for unsuspecting ears I love it though- he is just a tad bit POd in that song!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

oh trust me, there will be people trying to mosh...DH and I have gone to several shows where we didn't expect people to find a way and what not..and yup there they were going at it...
I'm like you, I'd much prefer to be upstairs...I get a good view without being stuck behind that one tall guy who I SWEAR follows me around to every show and no chance of being harmed at the hands of the pit...
Definitely let me know how it was..


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> I get a good view without being stuck behind that one tall guy who I SWEAR follows me around to every show and no chance of being harmed at the hands of the pit...
> .



OMG- when we saw Dimmu- there was this one guy in the pit- I swear to you he could have been a "cro-magnon man'! He was huge- His face was poker striaght the entire time and he looked like no matter what came his way- he would take it down!  


ITA- I love to be above the crowd to see what's going on b/c they are part of the show If I were on the floor, my luck- I would be picked up over someone's head and passed around and thrown onstage  

I would just do one of these and then take a dive


----------



## Googelibear

Krissalee said:


> I am 32 years old.  I have been married since I was 25 (celebrating our 7th anniversary at WDW).
> 
> DH and I choose not to have children.  I have never wanted to have children.  Early in our marriage, people asked questions about kids, and we always said, "We aren't having any.  We are happy as we are."
> 
> I guess they thought we were bluffing, because the questions have been coming hard and fast.
> 
> My usual responses, depending on the questioning:
> "No, we are not having children"
> "No, we are not planning on having children."
> "We don't want to have children - our dogs are enough."
> "We don't want children - we are very happy with our life as it is."
> "We choose not to have chidren."
> "We choose to be child-free."
> "We choose not to be parents."
> "We want to be good aunts and uncles, and that will satisfy us"
> 
> People keep on asking, and they don't find my answers acceptable.  They don't feel that my choice is VALID?
> 
> It makes me angry, but it also makes me sad.  I think a lot of people are having children because it is expected of them, and not what they really want.
> 
> Any one want to give their input - I would appreciate it!


I know exactly what you're living.  If those answers aren't good enough for who ever is nosey enough to want to know, tough.

DH and I lived for 14 years like that. It's none of anyone's busineess.

I should add that something happened to us and - Surprise- we suddenly found ourselves pregnant with twin boys.  It turned out to be a good thing, but not something I wished for :wink:


----------



## LeesyUD

My fiance's best friend's wife is alway making comments about how we would make good parents and how soon will we have kids after we get married.  We also try to skirt the issue bc she can be so snobby!!  One time we were at a bday party for her daughters (they are like niece's to us) and at the time me and my fiance had move in with my parents for financial reasons.  Out of nowhere in front of all her friends and family that we did not know she goes "So are you guys still living with your parents?"  Now I was not embarrassed to tell that to my friends or family but I was so mad that she announced in front of all these people that stared at us.  Ugh it made me so made, I do not tell her anything about us now and I make sure that my fiance does not either.  And I will continue to ignore her on kids comments as well.


----------



## Donald's Fan in PHX!

maddhatir said:


> Welcome Leesy!!!
> 
> And Steve, your dogs are adorable! I love the "superman" shot- you should photoshop a cape on the pup!!!



Yeah, no kidding lol   A little red cape and a blue shirt would be hilarious


----------



## PoohNTuck

Welcome *Lisa*!  Hubby and I lived at home with family the 2 years before we were married.  It wasn't cool but sometimes it's necessary.  Insecure people will call you out on that in front of others.  Lots of us have been there (and survived!)   


*Steve*,  The pics of your dogs made me smile.  It's our vision of the perfect life.  A warm place, 2 large dogs lying by our private pool... yeh, good times.  Can't wait to show my hubby when he gets home from work this morning.  He'll love it!  Thanks again for sharing.


----------



## Donald's Fan in PHX!

yeah, those are our kids


----------



## Liisa

Hi all!

Anyone remember me?!!   

I've been SERIOUSLY missing in action for a looonnngg time.  I've missed so much on this thread.  Lots of new faces - which is awesome.  In my time away, hubby and I vacationed in Mexico in May (loved, loved, LOVED it!  Going back next year for sure).  My company got crazy busy (thank goodness, things were getting a bit nerve wracking for a time.  We had all the spring start up / lawn care to do (like everyone else, I'm sure) and we are getting ready to leave on Friday for our Disney trip - can't wait.  We finally seem to be catching up a little.  The pool is finally open!!!  The dogs are enjoying it.











Also, DH and I celebrated our 8 yr anniversary a week ago.  We decided to really have fun and bought a Mini Cooper Convertible in red for our anniversary present!  We had to order it, 8 weeks until it is in.  I CAN'T WAIT!!!  I've never had a convertible and Minis just look like such fun cars.

Anyone got any good vacation plans coming up?  Feels good to be back!

Liisa


----------



## Barthy73

Speaking of vacations..

My wife and I vacationed in Cancun in November at Dreams.  The resort was wonderful and had above average food for an all-inclusive, but we'll never return.  We gave once chance to a non-adults only resort, and it's not for us.  Sandals in Jamaica spoiled us 2 years ago.

Now, we're just counting down for October when we go to Excellence Punta Cana in the Dominican Republic!


----------



## Liisa

Hi Bathy,

I agree with you... adults only is the way to go.  We stayed at the Iberostar Grand and it was fabulous not having kids running around everywhere.  Next year we are looking to stay at Secrets Maroma (also adults only).  The Grand was absolutely gorgeous and the food was very, very good.  We ate dinner every night at a sit down restaurant and were impressed with almost everything they put in front of us.  

Next door to our hotel was the Iberostar Maya resort.  It was also very pretty, but less upscale, and they are family friendly.  Too many kids in the pool for me....

Keep us posted on your trips!


----------



## Poppinsme

Hi everybody its been awhile since I posted here.  

Just wanted to tell you all that we adopted a Bulldog from the Bulldog Club of America Rescue group.  His Name is Buddy and he is a 4 year old male and I just love him.   In about an hour I will be taking him to the Vet to be checked out and get my heart worm meds.  He is just a big love sponge.
This makes are brood now: 5 Horses, 3 Cats, 2 Dogs, 1 Hen, 1 Fish.  
A very happy home have we.


----------



## Liisa

Poppinsme said:


> Just wanted to tell you all that we adopted a Bulldog from the Bulldog Club of America Rescue group.  His Name is Buddy and he is a 4 year old male and I just love him.



Pictures of the new addition... please!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Hi all!
> 
> Anyone remember me?!!



You're crazy! How can we forget you!!! Your pool looks beautiful- and OMG- congrats on your new car! Sounds fun! DH has a Jeep and takes off the lid, as I call it 




Barthy73 said:


> Speaking of vacations..
> 
> Now, we're just counting down for October when we go to Excellence Punta Cana in the Dominican Republic!



Barthy- DH went to the DR a few years back- stayed in La Romana (the area was beautiful- very green, it was a long ways from the airport) We stayed @- Casa Del Mar- just an average all-inclusive. After being in Mexico a few times, I was not thrilled with the DR - I prefer not to go back- I will stick with Mexico- The people in Mexico are SO nice I want to eat them up! The people in the DR- um, not so friendly. But- that is just MHO. 

Have you ever been to the DR? 



Poppinsme said:


> Hi everybody its been awhile since I posted here.
> 
> Just wanted to tell you all that we adopted a Bulldog from the Bulldog Club of America Rescue group.  His Name is Buddy and he is a 4 year old male and I just love him.   In about an hour I will be taking him to the Vet to be checked out and get my heart worm meds.  He is just a big love sponge.
> This makes are brood now: 5 Horses, 3 Cats, 2 Dogs, 1 Hen, 1 Fish.
> A very happy home have we.



Yes! Pics please!


----------



## Barthy73

maddhatir said:


> Barthy- DH went to the DR a few years back- stayed in La Romana (the area was beautiful- very green, it was a long ways from the airport) We stayed @- Casa Del Mar- just an average all-inclusive. After being in Mexico a few times, I was not thrilled with the DR - I prefer not to go back- I will stick with Mexico- The people in Mexico are SO nice I want to eat them up! The people in the DR- um, not so friendly. But- that is just MHO.
> 
> Have you ever been to the DR?




This will be our first trip to DR.  We love Mexico as well and thought we'd give DR a try, as it was about $1k cheaper, and we're in the #1 rated resort in Punta Cana.  If they're not nice, I won't tip.  LOL


----------



## TKDisneylover

Liisa said:


> Hi all!
> 
> The pool is finally open!!!  The dogs are enjoying it.
> 
> Also, DH and I celebrated our 8 yr anniversary a week ago.  We decided to really have fun and bought a Mini Cooper Convertible in red for our anniversary present!  We had to order it, 8 weeks until it is in.  I CAN'T WAIT!!!  I've never had a convertible and Minis just look like such fun cars.
> 
> Liisa



Beautiful pool, beautiful kids!!  My dog would have loved a pool when she was younger, she was such a water baby!  She would splash herself with the water in her water dish, it was very comical to watch!

Happy Anniversary!!  And congrats on the MC!!  I wanted to get one back in April, we replaced our SUV.  Unfortunately DH didn't think they were safe enough or able to handle the WI winters, he won out and I ended up with another SUV.   But he promised when we retire in the gulf coast I can get one.



Barthy73 said:


> Speaking of vacations..
> 
> Sandals in Jamaica spoiled us 2 years ago.



Which Sandals did you stay at?  Our first trip to an AI was Sandals Montego Bay.  We had a great time, unfortunately DH's back went out so he spent a lot of time in the hot tub....drinking many cocktails to relieve his pain.  We would love to go back, but it's hard to justify the expense compared to Mexico.  We definitely want to go back to Mexico, hopefully sooner than later!



Poppinsme said:


> Hi everybody its been awhile since I posted here.
> 
> Just wanted to tell you all that we adopted a Bulldog from the Bulldog Club of America Rescue group.  His Name is Buddy and he is a 4 year old male and I just love him.   In about an hour I will be taking him to the Vet to be checked out and get my heart worm meds.  He is just a big love sponge.
> This makes are brood now: 5 Horses, 3 Cats, 2 Dogs, 1 Hen, 1 Fish.
> A very happy home have we.



Wow, you have really got the animals!!  Definitely post pics of your kids!

Just an FYI, my hometown & outlying areas have been in the national news this week because of all the flooding here.  It's been ridiculous trying to get around the city because the Fox river runs through it and has flooded every bridge area.  Many dams are being watched as a threat of them starting to fail grows.  Thankfully we live on high ground and have not have any problems.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> We had a great time, unfortunately DH's back went out so he spent a lot of time in the hot....drinking many cocktails to relieve his pain.  We would love to go back, but it's hard to justify the expense compared to Mexico.  We definitely want to go back to Mexico, hopefully sooner than later!
> 
> .



OMG! Where you here when I went to Mexico this past Feb and my back went out!???!

I have no idea why or how it happened- it just slowly got worse until I was screaming in the middle of the night and had to take a trip to the hotel doc- he shot me up with a steroid that did NOTHING! But he was so sweet- he did not have any of the "good" drugs to give me, so it was not his fault I was still in pain


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> OMG! Where you here when I went to Mexico this past Feb and my back went out!???!
> 
> I have no idea why or how it happened- it just slowly got worse until I was screaming in the middle of the night and had to take a trip to the hotel doc- he shot me up with a steroid that did NOTHING! But he was so sweet- he did not have any of the "good" drugs to give me, so it was not his fault I was still in pain



I do remember you mentioning this, can't remember if I commented.  Did you ever figure out what happened?  Do you still have problems with your back?

My DH had injured his back 2 weeks before the trip and had been seeing a chiropractor for treatment.  He was feeling pretty good when we left, but I think the stress of the unknown (he get's a little frazzled going to new places), and lugging our luggage and sitting on the plane for 3 hours aggravated it.  I'll never forget this, when we got into our room he collapsed on the bed and said, "can we go home now?"  I felt so bad for him!  We didn't think to visit a doctor, but I had brought along aspirin and made an icepack out of one of my cosmetics bags.  So between icing, hangin' in the hot tub, alcohol, and a little local medicine  he was feeling better by day 3 and enjoying the relaxing atmosphere.  THANK GOODNESS THERE WERE NO KIDS AROUND!!


----------



## Barthy73

TKDisneylover said:


> Which Sandals did you stay at?  Our first trip to an AI was Sandals Montego Bay.



We stayed at Sandals Grande Ocho Rios.  It's a huge resort, though a bit older, as it used to be a different brand.  We spent time at Sandals Dunns River as well, and it was much newer and nicer.  

We booked our trip to DR for about $700 less than we paid for our Jamaica trip two years ago, and we're staying at the #1 rated resort.  We'll go back to Jamaica someday, but it's a bit more money than we want to spend on this trip.  We'll also go back to Mexico, but it'll definitely be adults-only, and we prefer a nice relaxing beach/pool setting compared to a festive nightlife.  We may go back to Cancun, but it'll definitely be with other people.  We would not make the trip ourselves again.


----------



## Liisa

TKDisneylover said:


> I wanted to get one back in April, we replaced our SUV.  Unfortunately DH didn't think they were safe enough or able to handle the WI winters, he won out and I ended up with another SUV.   But he promised when we retire in the gulf coast I can get one.




I know what you mean... we have an SUV.  Because of the gas prices and how much they've depreciated, we are holding on to it.  No sense losing money on it, plus we need it to shuttle the dogs, oops, I mean kids (they clearly don't believe that they are "dogs"!) around.  So the Mini is a third car.  I still can't believe how much the value of SUV's have declined!  

I'll cross my fingers that you'll get one some day.  It was sooo neat to be able to build up the car and pick almost every little detail.  Really makes it feel like it is "yours"!  7 more weeks until it arrives!


----------



## Liisa

Liisa said:


>



The wheels on my little car look odd...


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I do remember you mentioning this, can't remember if I commented.  Did you ever figure out what happened?  Do you still have problems with your back?
> 
> My DH had injured his back 2 weeks before the trip and had been seeing a chiropractor for treatment.  He was feeling pretty good when we left, but I think the stress of the unknown (he get's a little frazzled going to new places), and lugging our luggage and sitting on the plane for 3 hours aggravated it.  I'll never forget this, when we got into our room he collapsed on the bed and said, "can we go home now?"  I felt so bad for him!  We didn't think to visit a doctor, but I had brought along aspirin and made an icepack out of one of my cosmetics bags.  So between icing, hangin' in the hot tub, alcohol, and a little local medicine  he was feeling better by day 3 and enjoying the relaxing atmosphere.  THANK GOODNESS THERE WERE NO KIDS AROUND!!



My back still hurts on and off, it has for years- but it goes OUT sometimes I mean OUT!- I found out I have 2 herniated discs- I think I may stem way back when I used to go on a friend's speed boat and we would, as we called it, pound waves! When you are young you don't think about what you are doing- not only was I pounding the discs in my back- we would be out in the bay and a we would just jump the wakes of the large boats! We would be airborne! Hello- danger! We would have so much fun. Now I think back- I am like- were we crazy!? 

We would got out in the ocean and would be full throttle.  We always said, with Mike (our friend) the only speed would be, stop or full throttle! I swear I told him he should name is boat "Suicidal Tendencies" it fit him to the T!

Anywho- tell your DH to be careful, not sure if he has ever had an MRI to dx his back problems, but- if it is a herniated disc, a chiro is the WORSE thing you can do for it! They told me don't even THINK about a chiro. I did PT and my body healed itself. I could hardly walk when it went out and I had numbness and weakness in my L leg. 

I went to a Physiatrist to inquire about a shot in the spine- and he said my body is healing and he would not want to give me the shot.


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> The wheels on my little car look odd...




  looks like you need some air in them!!!


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## JCandKT

Hey all...

JC and I are trying to decide...

Mickey's Halloween Party or Cirque du Soliel La Nouba?


----------



## TKDisneylover

Liisa said:


> I'll cross my fingers that you'll get one some day.  It was sooo neat to be able to build up the car and pick almost every little detail.  Really makes it feel like it is "yours"!  7 more weeks until it arrives!



I will get one, but that will not be for 10 years.  Our projected move to the gulf.  However, I always ask DH if he would consider moving there sooner if we continued to work.  I don't think I could retire completely, but running a small coffee shop has always been a dream.  And DH could be a certified handyman and get tons of work, he's a born mechanic, repairman, etc.  

I also like the option of choosing all the details of the car, your right about it feeling like it's "yours".  Enjoy your little car when it comes!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> We would got out in the ocean and would be full throttle.  We always said, with Mike (our friend) the only speed would be, stop or full throttle! I swear I told him he should name is boat "Suicidal Tendencies" it fit him to the T!
> 
> Anywho- tell your DH to be careful, not sure if he has ever had an MRI to dx his back problems, but- if it is a herniated disc, a chiro is the WORSE thing you can do for it! They told me don't even THINK about a chiro. I did PT and my body healed itself. I could hardly walk when it went out and I had numbness and weakness in my L leg.
> 
> I went to a Physiatrist to inquire about a shot in the spine- and he said my body is healing and he would not want to give me the shot.



You wild and crazy kids!!!   Thank goodness you didn't kill yourselves!  Okay, that just sounded like someone's grandma, honest, I'm only 44. 

Actually both DH and I have back problems.  He has a "bulging" L4/L5 to which he has had 6 steroid injections and a procedure where they laser around the disc to relieve pressure.  That procedure did wonders for him and he is doing really good.  I think if anything he has discomfort at times because of arthritis.  He doesn't let it stop him from working or anything, but he does have days where it will "go out" but he follows the ibuprofen/ice regimine faithfully which does the trick.

And for me, I have a herniated L4/L5 because I lifted something really heavy, and I actually heard it "pop"!  It herniated straight towards my spine (typically it shoots to the left of right), so I tend to get back spasms when it's really agitated.  Thank goodness I've only had 2 episodes since I injured it 7 years ago!  I have had 2 steroid injections and everything has been great since!  Like DH I have my days, usually after spending a lot of time gardening, so I'm careful to listen to my back when it gets achy and stop, take ibuprofen and ice.  Neither of us allow the chiropracter to give us "adjustments" for our backs, we go solely for therapy which includes ultra- sound and electrode stimulation.  But neither of us have had the need to see him in a long time.

Sorry to hear that yours still bothers you but it sounds like it's manageable for the most part.


----------



## TKDisneylover

JCandKT said:


> Hey all...
> 
> JC and I are trying to decide...
> 
> Mickey's Halloween Party or Cirque du Soliel La Nouba?



BOTH, if you can!   We did the Halloween party and really had fun with the halloween bags and stopping for candy.  And getting onto rides were a walk on for every ride.  And the fireworks were excellent!

We did Cirque on our last visit and enjoyed that too, it's a "must-see" at least once.

Sorry, I guess that really doesn't help.   Either one you pick I think you will enjoy. Just my IHO.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Barthy73 said:


> We stayed at Sandals Grande Ocho Rios.  It's a huge resort, though a bit older, as it used to be a different brand.  We spent time at Sandals Dunns River as well, and it was much newer and nicer.
> 
> We booked our trip to DR for about $700 less than we paid for our Jamaica trip two years ago, and we're staying at the #1 rated resort.  We'll go back to Jamaica someday, but it's a bit more money than we want to spend on this trip.  We'll also go back to Mexico, but it'll definitely be adults-only, and we prefer a nice relaxing beach/pool setting compared to a festive nightlife.  We may go back to Cancun, but it'll definitely be with other people.  We would not make the trip ourselves again.



I knew a co-worker who stayed at the Ocho Rios Sandals and really enjoyed their stay there.  When we went to Sandals, in 1998, we paid $2800 then for the entire trip! I still can't believe we paid that much, but it was the first time we had ever traveled out of the country and also using a travel agent.  We visit Mexico twice for that price!

When we went to Mexico we did not do an AI, we chose to stay at a small 20 room boutique hotel right on the beach ($100 a night in June).  It was not adults only, but we only saw a couple kids once during the week, otherwise it was mostly couples.  It was right off of 5th Av. in the city of Playa del Carmen.  We definitely want to go back there again.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> You wild and crazy kids!!!   Thank goodness you didn't kill yourselves!  Okay, that just sounded like someone's grandma, honest, I'm only 44.
> 
> Actually both DH and I have back problems.  He has a "bulging" L4/L5 to which he has had 6 steroid injections and a procedure where they laser around the disc to relieve pressure.  That procedure did wonders for him and he is doing really good.  I think if anything he has discomfort at times because of arthritis.  He doesn't let it stop him from working or anything, but he does have days where it will "go out" but he follows the ibuprofen/ice regimine faithfully which does the trick.
> 
> And for me, I have a herniated L4/L5 because I lifted something really heavy, and I actually heard it "pop"!  It herniated straight towards my spine (typically it shoots to the left of right), so I tend to get back spasms when it's really agitated.  Thank goodness I've only had 2 episodes since I injured it 7 years ago!  I have had 2 steroid injections and everything has been great since!  Like DH I have my days, usually after spending a lot of time gardening, so I'm careful to listen to my back when it gets achy and stop, take ibuprofen and ice.  Neither of us allow the chiropracter to give us "adjustments" for our backs, we go solely for therapy which includes ultra- sound and electrode stimulation.  But neither of us have had the need to see him in a long time.
> 
> Sorry to hear that yours still bothers you but it sounds like it's manageable for the most part.



I will be 44 next month- and I do think back at a lot of things we did and say- how dumb- but we had fun while doing all the stupid things! Probably b/c you didn't have a care in the world back then, who thought they would get hurt?  

My back is managable- but when it goes out- it laughs at anything but Percocet. I might as well eat M&Ms for the pain. Muscle relaxers helped a few times during the last "episode" but the Percocets really help.


----------



## Donald's Fan in PHX!

Liisa said:


> Pictures of the new addition... please!!!



Yes I agree, pics please...and your dogs look like they love the water


----------



## Donald's Fan in PHX!

Barthy73 said:


> This will be our first trip to DR.  We love Mexico as well and thought we'd give DR a try, as it was about $1k cheaper, and we're in the #1 rated resort in Punta Cana.  If they're not nice, I won't tip.  LOL



   I AGREE, Mexico vacations rock! one of our regular vacations are Disney trips and Mexico resorts. We just got back from a week in Puerto Vallarta at the beginning of May. It was beautiful as always.
   We have a cruise to Mexico this Aug too, can't wait to go back.


----------



## JCandKT

TKDisneylover said:


> BOTH, if you can!   We did the Halloween party and really had fun with the halloween bags and stopping for candy.  And getting onto rides were a walk on for every ride.  And the fireworks were excellent!
> 
> We did Cirque on our last visit and enjoyed that too, it's a "must-see" at least once.
> 
> Sorry, I guess that really doesn't help.   Either one you pick I think you will enjoy. Just my IHO.



Thanks Tammy!  That reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally helps.  <smirk>


----------



## Mayhem2008

Hi Everyone!
Hi Sam! Hi Madd! Where did that drummersmask chick run off to??? 
Madd, you have got to get to Mayhem. Wish you could get to the Mansfield, MA show. I got a really good seat, right near the stage but not in the pit. I'm too old for that! I was able to get in on pre-sale tickets and also got a presale *Slipknot* t-shirt....gawd I love them guys..... (and Madd says "I know, I know!  )
I spent a couple of weeks in NY, just got back this past week. Combo pf business and pleasure. The pleasure was seeing the family and eating. I swear my family has an inner bell that tells them to eat something every 2 hours and we aren't talking fruits & veggies here, people!
Next trip is in August. Again business and pleasure, then onto Disney in September!  
Been keeping up with you all from my little corner of the world. Summer has kinda hit here in the east. One day it's hot and the next day I have my flannel shirt back on. 
Hope you all have a fab day! The Knot Chick


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> Hi Everyone!
> Hi Sam! Hi Madd! Where did that drummersmask chick run off to???
> Madd, you have got to get to Mayhem. Wish you could get to the Mansfield, MA show. I got a really good seat, right near the stage but not in the pit. I'm too old for that! I was able to get in on pre-sale tickets and also got a presale *Slipknot* t-shirt....gawd I love them guys..... (and Madd says "I know, I know!  )
> I spent a couple of weeks in NY, just got back this past week. Combo pf business and pleasure. The pleasure was seeing the family and eating. I swear my family has an inner bell that tells them to eat something every 2 hours and we aren't talking fruits & veggies here, people!
> Next trip is in August. Again business and pleasure, then onto Disney in September!
> Been keeping up with you all from my little corner of the world. Summer has kinda hit here in the east. One day it's hot and the next day I have my flannel shirt back on.
> Hope you all have a fab day! The Knot Chick



  

So? Did I hear right and Slipknot is changing their masks??? I was listening half-heartedly to the DJ on Hard Attack and I thought that is what he said??

I heard that Slipknot said no one really cares about the other bands that will be performing- they will all be there to see them I am liking those guys- that drummermask girl really turned me on to them! 

I am going to see Type O Negative!!!!!! *high pitch girly screams*
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	


 THIS TIME I AM STAYING PUT! AND WILL VISIT THE BAR AFTERWARDS! I am hoping for a bite on the neck gosh darnit!
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




So where at in NY were you??? (I can't wait to go back in a few months THIS time Mid-Town baby!) Is your fam Italian- I ask that b/c when I was small all I heard from grandmom was MANGIA! MANGIA!- eat- eat! Granted a few of my cousins now have very weird eating disorders, but who knew how bad you can screw up a kid when they are that small 

It is SO beautiful here in NJ- 82 and sunshine- no humidity! I would like to put an order in with Mother Earth for these kinds of days all summer long!


----------



## Mayhem2008

MADD!!!!! I am sooo looking forward to the Knot's new masks. They change them with every tour cycle. I love the way they've evolved since the beginning. OMG Type O???? Ya know that Pete has hid teeth filed so they are nice and pointy, right? Just right for having a snack here and there  Hope your neck is on the menu that night. Pictures please!! I'll see them no matter what. 
I was in Upstate NY, near Syracuse, and yes, you're right, I come from an Italian family! Their motto is "if you're breathing your're eating  I had such a great time but it was good to get home to Hubby, my own bed and my own toilet I brought back so much stuff with me that I'm still unpacking boxes. I didn't know that much would fit into a small car but it did. While I was in NY Dad sold his house so he wanted to gove me a whole bunch of stuff. I took some things I needed but I couldn't convince him to surrender the laptop 
Good to talk with you again...I'm off to listen to Serpentine Offering (love that song) and then Subliminal Verses...oohhh did you get the new Wednesday 13 CD "Skeletons"? It's only for sale at Hot Topic and the store in the closest city to me doesn't carry them It's not sold on their website either. I hear it's killer!


----------



## maddhatir

eeeeekkk! I e-mailed the DJ dude on Hard Attack and gave him crap that they never play Slayer's _He!!!!!!!! Awaiiiiiiits_!!!

IT'S ON! IT'S ON! I am freaking! IT'S CRANKING!!!


----------



## Mayhem2008

Madd, I emailed you...I can't PM you yet because I don't have enough posts. Hope you got my message


----------



## PoohNTuck

I love reading about everyone's fave places to stay.  I had a miserable experience with an ex at the Hyatt in Cancun and had sworn off Mexico (although I really enjoyed Isla Mujeres).  Perhaps we will try again someday in response to all the glowing reviews here.  You guys do it for so cheap!

We usually travel approx 2 weeks at a time and like to include some international destinations.  Love cruising.  Our trips cost 4-5k but we eat lots and see lots and I always budget for it and stay within the budget which makes me feel good.

I'd like to hit every continent with DH sometime in the next few years.  Guess it will depend on how the US dollar fares!


----------



## Mayhem2008

Good Morning!
It's bloody cold here this morning...46 but sunny. Now that I have the weather report outta the way.... 
Has anyone ever eaten at the Garden Grill character thingie in Epcot? We have a rez there for when we go to Disney but I'm not sure what the food is like. The Food & Wine Fest will be going on while we are there so if the Garden Grill is a bust I know we can do better elsewhere. All those countries and all that booze...my idea of heaven!  
Anyone have plans for the weekend? We have to go to an anniversary bash on Saturday. It's a BYOB type of thing, very casual. Madd, you can appreciate this: I was already forwarned to bring my MP3 player because they will have "live entertainment" (a band) there and the people throwing the party know my taste in music is VASTLY different than what will be played. They want me to bring a Triple Chocolate Kahluha Cake with me but I may do a Black Russian cake instead. I'm out of Kahluha and forgot to buy it when I went thru New Hampshire. Next time I go I'm making sure I have a list!
Hope you all have a good day. I'm off to run errands.


----------



## maddhatir

PoohNTuck said:


> I love reading about everyone's fave places to stay.  I had a miserable experience with an ex at the Hyatt in Cancun and had sworn off Mexico (although I really enjoyed Isla Mujeres).  Perhaps we will try again someday in response to all the glowing reviews here.  You guys do it for so cheap!
> 
> We usually travel approx 2 weeks at a time and like to include some international destinations.  Love cruising.  Our trips cost 4-5k but we eat lots and see lots and I always budget for it and stay within the budget which makes me feel good.
> 
> I'd like to hit every continent with DH sometime in the next few years.  Guess it will depend on how the US dollar fares!



I wanted to ask everyone here about their trips- I use Apple Vacations- the prices for me, seem very reasonable- has everyone checked them out to compare???

Pooh- you HAVE to go back to Mexico- I am sure it was the _company _you were with that ruined it for you  

Now I have been to Riviera Maya 2x and Cancun 2x- I am not a nightlife person but- I still like Cancun better for some reason. We do not so the clubs. Maybe b/c the first time I ever went to Mexico, we stayed in Cancun and I just had such a great time walking to the shopping areas etc- it just stuck with me. And like I said- I just love the people 



Mayhem2008 said:


> Good Morning!
> It's bloody cold here this morning...46 but sunny. Now that I have the weather report outta the way....
> Has anyone ever eaten at the Garden Grill character thingie in Epcot? We have a rez there for when we go to Disney but I'm not sure what the food is like. The Food & Wine Fest will be going on while we are there so if the Garden Grill is a bust I know we can do better elsewhere. All those countries and all that booze...my idea of heaven!
> Anyone have plans for the weekend? We have to go to an anniversary bash on Saturday. It's a BYOB type of thing, very casual. Madd, you can appreciate this: I was already forwarned to bring my MP3 player because they will have "live entertainment" (a band) there and the people throwing the party know my taste in music is VASTLY different than what will be played. They want me to bring a Triple Chocolate Kahluha Cake with me but I may do a Black Russian cake instead. I'm out of Kahluha and forgot to buy it when I went thru New Hampshire. Next time I go I'm making sure I have a list!
> Hope you all have a good day. I'm off to run errands.



May- mind if I call you May? I have not heard great things about the Garden Grill, have you been over to the Restaurant Board to check out what they are saying? I have never eaten there though. I checked the menu in the past and they do not have any veggie selections that I remember, that would be another reason for me not to go.

How about the Coral Reef? It has been years since I have been there but when we went- we really liked it. I made a ressie for our next trip b/c I think both my niece and my SIL who have never been, will like the atmosphere. 

DH and I love to eat in France too. We usually just walk in before Illuminations and ask for seat by the window. They dim the lights in the restaurant- it is nice. Yes, I said we walk in! At that time of the night there are not that many people there! We go in Sept and right after Thanksgiving during non-peak time though. 

Have you been to F&W before?? We have been to several F&Ws but it seems like as the years went on it just got way too crowded for our liking. I heard the weekends during F&W are NUTS, especially Sat nights! So be sure to try and go during the week.


----------



## arielchickenofthesea

OoOoOo...Bad backs....DH and I Just got back from 18 days at WDW and used an ECV the whole time. My back *went out* about 3 years ago and got progressively worse over time. I tried chiropractors, massage and finally steroid shots, nothing worked. By last year, I could not walk more than a half day, that is now down to about 10 minutes now. I am having disk replacement surgery on July 2nd for my L-5/S-1 disc area. It hurts so bad, sometimes I just cry and cry... 

I was diagnosed with Degenerative Disk Disease and it is more common than you would think. It is also hereditary or can be due to simple aging after a lifetime of hard work that take it's toll on a back. It can *pop* up suddenly or come on very slowly. 

Prolasped Disks, AKA, slipped or protruding disks are also common. Often with prolapsed disks a little PT and rest can heal it up. When you have NO disk material left between the vertebral bones and there is a nerve between those bones, I can tell you. IT HURTS! That is where I am today. LOTSA PAIN even with the meds! I have been on heavy meds (60 mgs of Morphine in the AM, 60 mgs of Morphine in the PM and 6 Percocet during the day, every day for about 6 months now! That is a lot and I want to be done with them!) for a couple years now and wil be so glad to get off the meds and be able to walk again. I want to walk the whole of Epcot when I am completely healed, as I have done in the past! 

Good luck to all who have back issues, each is unique and painful and needs to be treated the best way for what is wrong with it. But I can tell you, the pain can change your life. I am hoping that surgery will give me back my life!
Prayers to all of you with back issues, I hope you find the relief you need. I KNOW what it is like. 
arielchickenofthesea


----------



## maddhatir

arielchickenofthesea said:


> OoOoOo...Bad backs....DH and I Just got back from 18 days at WDW and used an ECV the whole time. My back *went out* about 3 years ago and got progressively worse over time. I tried chiropractors, massage and finally steroid shots, nothing worked. By last year, I could not walk more than a half day, that is now down to about 10 minutes now. I am having disk replacement surgery on July 2nd for my L-5/S-1 disc area. It hurts so bad, sometimes I just cry and cry...
> 
> I was diagnosed with Degenerative Disk Disease and it is more common than you would think. It is also hereditary or can be due to simple aging after a lifetime of hard work that take it's toll on a back. It can *pop* up suddenly or come on very slowly.
> 
> Prolasped Disks, AKA, slipped or protruding disks are also common. Often with prolapsed disks a little PT and rest can heal it up. When you have NO disk material left between the vertebral bones and there is a nerve between those bones, I can tell you. IT HURTS! That is where I am today. LOTSA PAIN even with the meds! I have been on heavy meds (60 mgs of Morphine in the AM, 60 mgs of Morphine in the PM and 6 Percocet during the day, every day for about 6 months now! That is a lot and I want to be done with them!) for a couple years now and wil be so glad to get off the meds and be able to walk again. I want to walk the whole of Epcot when I am completely healed, as I have done in the past!
> 
> Good luck to all who have back issues, each is unique and painful and needs to be treated the best way for what is wrong with it. But I can tell you, the pain can change your life. I am hoping that surgery will give me back my life!
> Prayers to all of you with back issues, I hope you find the relief you need. I KNOW what it is like.
> arielchickenofthesea



Wow Ariel- that is a lot of meds! I hope it is not too hard for you to get off of all of them. 

Crossing my fingers for you on July 2nd!!!!- please check back- I would love to hear about your progress! How long do your docs say before you will be walking around Epcot!!! 

My doc mentioned something about the disc "leaking"??? you can see it in the MRI- I am not sure of the proper terms, but is that what the disc material might be?? 

UGH- when my back goes out- I explain it to people like this.....you know when you put a piece of tinfoil on one of your fillings (I have not done that since I was a kid!) that jolt you get? That is the constant pain I feel when I am doing really bad.

One doc I went to scared me to death with everything that "could" happen to be b/c of my problem.He told me if I do not get the shot I can end up paralized eventually, lose bowel funtions etc!   Won't be going back to him anymore! 

But the Physiatrist from Univ. of Penn- told me, yes, that can happen to SOME people, but not all! I liked his answer better! I will stick with him. 

Don't forget about us!


----------



## maddhatir

Why am I still up? Just waiting for some pics to download and then I am off to bed!

But- just wanted to tell you all I went to my niece's Karate thingy earlier. She is 6. And might I say- give her some time and I sure would not want to meet up with her and her any crap! She was so focused it was unreal! Anywho...... It was at a local Little Gym. You know, I really wanted to pounce some of the parents tonight!

It was not the kids who were annoying at all- it was the one mother who almost ran over a little boy who was barely able to walk so she can get a pic of her kids doing his moves! And it was the 2 snoots in front of SIL and I who kept turning around giving us crumby faces b/c we were talking....quietly. god forbid we miss their precious one doing some moves. 

Do you really think they cared to see my niece as much as I wanted to see their little one....... 

ahhh- the poor kids.......


----------



## TKDisneylover

JCandKT said:


> Thanks Tammy!  That reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally helps.  <smirk>


----------



## Mayhem2008

Good morning! It's sooo quiet here right now. Hubby has gone off fishing, the Blue jays are off screaming in someone elses window and I'm going tio spend the morning working, since my bloody internet was down most of the day yesterday 
We have to go to an anniversary BBQ this afternoon. Black flies, kids and *gasp* country music!!! Madd! Throw me a life raft!!! I'm bringing my MP3 player so I can get lost in the tunes. I'll also be bringing my beloved Jack Daniels so this chik will be a happy camper.
What's everyone else doing this weekend???


----------



## PhotobearSam

Well...I am working from at least noon till 10 pm everyday 7 days a week till July 1st...then it's 10 am to at least 10 pm 7 days a week till Sept 5th then again with the noon to 10 pm till October 15th...then I will have a life again. 


I shall live vicariously through all of you for the next few months if that is alright with all of you guys...


----------



## TKDisneylover

PoohNTuck said:


> (although I really enjoyed Isla Mujeres).
> 
> We usually travel approx 2 weeks at a time and like to include some international destinations.  Love cruising.  Our trips cost 4-5k but we eat lots and see lots and I always budget for it and stay within the budget which makes me feel good.
> 
> I'd like to hit every continent with DH sometime in the next few years.  Guess it will depend on how the US dollar fares!



Did you rent a golf cart to motor around the Island in?  I have a co-worker who owns property there, he plans to move there when he retires.  Right now he rents it out, now sure how much he charges but DH & would love to check out that little island.

I would love to travel for two weeks at a time, one week just never seems like enough time.  It seems like once you start getting acclimated to everything then it's time to head home.  Of course we're always saying, "if we could just stay a few more days (in a whiney voice)".  DH & are also hoping to do some European traveling one of these days.  Our next biggie will be Ireland, I would love to stay in a haunted castle.  Or at least do the haunted tours.  And DH has never cruised so I would like him to experience that.  They have some really great Mediterranean cruises that we would love to go on.



Mayhem2008 said:


> They want me to bring a Triple Chocolate Kahluha Cake with me but I may do a Black Russian cake instead. I'm out of Kahluha and forgot to buy it when I went thru New Hampshire. Next time I go I'm making sure I have a list!



I would love to get your recipe for the Kahluha cake, it's got to be awesome!  Could I get the recipe please?! 



Mayhem2008 said:


> Good morning! It's sooo quiet here right now. Hubby has gone off fishing, the Blue jays are off screaming in someone elses window and I'm going tio spend the morning working, since my bloody internet was down most of the day yesterday
> We have to go to an anniversary BBQ this afternoon. Black flies, kids and *gasp* country music!!! Madd! Throw me a life raft!!! I'm bringing my MP3 player so I can get lost in the tunes. I'll also be bringing my beloved Jack Daniels so this chik will be a happy camper.
> What's everyone else doing this weekend???



I feel sorry for you this afternoon, however you should be just fine since "Jack" is coming along!  When we have our Christmas family gathering for DH's side of the family I'm always sure to bring along something with alcohol in it.  His niece has a 6 year old daughter, 4 year old autistic son (who bounces off the walls, we literally become his mosh pit after he starts getting comfortable with everyone!), and 2 year old twin girls.  When it's time to open presents it becomes total chaos.  I just sit in the corner and   watch the action begin!

We originally had plans for a family picnic in a local park today, however with the flooding we have had the particular park we rented is under water.  So we've cancelled the picnic hoping to reschedule in August.  So instead we are off to DH's father's apartment at noon bringing along lunch goodies to celebrate Father's Day with him.  Then it's off to my mom's apartment to help her pack, she's moving in another month so we are going to store some of her stuff at our place.  Then tonight we will probably grill out, enjoy a nice summer evening on our front porch listening to Alice Cooper's nationally aired radio program, I'm sure some Chardonnay for me and New Glarus Spotted Cow for DH will be the drinks of choice.  Alice plays some really great old obscure(sp?) music.  I've been a big Alice fan since I was a teenager, so I enjoy listening to the interesting facts & music that he comes up with on his show.

And tomorrow we're hoping for another nice day, stop and visit my father for Father's Day and then home to do some much needed yardwork.  Yippee!

Have a great weekend everyone!


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Well...I am working from at least noon till 10 pm everyday 7 days a week till July 1st...then it's 10 am to at least 10 pm 7 days a week till Sept 5th then again with the noon to 10 pm till October 15th...then I will have a life again.
> 
> 
> I shall live vicariously through all of you for the next few months if that is alright with all of you guys...



Hey Sam!!!!!!! I knew you would be in full swing now that spring is here! 

I hope everything in your life is going well! 

Right now I am all over the place getting ready for tomorrow- Father's Day is here. My dad passed away 24 years ago and DHs dad has beenin CA since DH was about 8, we do celebrate it b/c MIL has been with the same guy for about 20 years now- he is a cool dude!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> My doc mentioned something about the disc "leaking"??? you can see it in the MRI- I am not sure of the proper terms, but is that what the disc material might be??



*maddhatir*, I meant to comment on this earlier.  Yes, the disc leaking is disc material, at least that's how it was explained to me.  It's was cushions your disc (the disc sack, where they inject the steroid, which is what I had done), between the disc.  When it herniates is when the material squirts out and typically goes to the right or to the left, that's why people have sciatic (sp?) pain in their left or right butt cheek, and it sometimes goes down the leg.  The material can push on nerves that then in return cause the pain.  It actually hardens after a while and that's what the doctor's are starting to "cut-off".  Not sure what the procedure is called, but I understand it has had some great results for many people.  As I mentioned earlier, mine squirted straight forward, which is rare, and that is why when it gets swollen or agitated it gives me back spasms that go right up my spine.  It literally lays me out flat on the floor.  But like I also said, those 2 steroid injections worked great and I have not had any major problems in over 6 years.


----------



## TKDisneylover

PhotobearSam said:


> Well...I am working from at least noon till 10 pm everyday 7 days a week till July 1st...then it's 10 am to at least 10 pm 7 days a week till Sept 5th then again with the noon to 10 pm till October 15th...then I will have a life again.
> 
> 
> I shall live vicariously through all of you for the next few months if that is alright with all of you guys...




Wow, those are crazy hours!  If I remember correctly from past readings, do you have a bed & breakfast?  Or motel?  I always thought it would be interesting to run a B & B, I bet you can some interesting guests.  Do you have a lot of return guests?  Just curious.  Hope you have a great season!


----------



## PoohNTuck

Luv Alice...
She asked me why 
The singer's name was Alice 
I said listen, baby 
You really wouldn't understand 

But I diverge.  

Rented some fun movies this week.  One of em was the new Jack Nicholson/Morgan Freeman flick "The Bucket List" about 2 terminally ill cancer patients who want to LIVE before they die.  Started thinking about my own personal bucket list in life... does anyone have a written bucket list?  Or just vague ideas of life adventures you want to have?  Or no idea- taking it day by day??

Just curious if anyone wants to share...

 I'm always on the lookout for a new adventure but don't have a written list yet.


----------



## PhotobearSam

TKDisneylover said:


> Wow, those are crazy hours!  If I remember correctly from past readings, do you have a bed & breakfast?  Or motel?  I always thought it would be interesting to run a B & B, I bet you can some interesting guests.  Do you have a lot of return guests?  Just curious.  Hope you have a great season!




We live in a touristy town Shediac, New Brunswick, Canada. It's the Lobster Capitol of the World. We are known  for our beach "Parlee Beach"

We own 16 two bedroom chalets (cottages), 7 one bedroom suites, and 24 motel rooms. Here is our site so you can see what I mean... www.shediac.com/gaudet/
We get a lot of weekly rentals and return customers.

To keep costs down, I am the only person who works the desk. I take every call, reservation, answer every email and check all customers in as well as do a lot of laundry...

It's not so bad...

We bought a lot of land across the street to build some more. We are looking at 30 more motel rooms, 12 more chalets, pool, hot-tub, etc etc...I want to turn it into a resort...

If anyone EVER comes to the east coast of Canada...LOOK me up, I have DISer rates.


----------



## maddhatir

PoohNTuck said:


> Luv Alice...
> She asked me why
> The singer's name was Alice
> I said listen, baby
> You really wouldn't understand
> 
> But I diverge.
> 
> Rented some fun movies this week.  One of em was the new Jack Nicholson/Morgan Freeman flick "The Bucket List" about 2 terminally ill cancer patients who want to LIVE before they die.  Started thinking about my own personal bucket list in life... does anyone have a written bucket list?  Or just vague ideas of life adventures you want to have?  Or no idea- taking it day by day??
> 
> Just curious if anyone wants to share...
> 
> I'm always on the lookout for a new adventure but don't have a written list yet.



Alice is a cool dude! I love his interviews he is always so tongue in cheek about everything! Have you ever seen him of the gold course, all decked out in his golf garb I love it. 

I have not seen The Bucket List yet! I like Jack and Morgan both. 

I do not have a list- I just feel I am lucky enough to do things that I want to do- they are certainly not grand- but on a smaller scale they are fun......

............who can say they lived in the USVI for 5 months, or went to Bermuda with 20 of their friends to get married,   have a Harley and love to ride , have a little sailboat and get to go sailing  (in a few weeks it will be ready) we are lucky we live by the ocean and many people have not even seen the ocean ......we don't have kids, so that keeps us *ab*normal....who wants to go through life thinking they are normal anyway....that's no fun 

The only thing I really want to do w/in 7 years is move. I want out of NJ. I love all of my family- but it is too expensive to live here, heck, it getting too expensive to live anywhere in the US! My ultimate move would be out of this country- but DH and I never agree on anything- he wants warm and sunshine- I would love to go to the English countryside. If he would say yes- I would look into everything right away, but it will never happen. Actually we were talking about New Zealand, not cold, not hot, but too far ..............So- here we will stay in the US of A. I want VA (on a lake) and he just wants to be by the water, preferably a body of water larger than a lake We both do agree and always have, on a log cabin. 

I told him- I do not want to be old and say- "I wish" so I told him ...7 YEARS! We have to decide something w/in the 7 years. 

OMG- I just wanted to share this pic of my niece doing Karate! She is 6 and she will kicking some butt soon! I am SO proud of her and how "into" this she is! You can just tell my her face in this pic! She is LOCO! She was screaming like a wild banshee


----------



## TKDisneylover

PoohNTuck said:


> Luv Alice...
> She asked me why
> The singer's name was Alice
> I said listen, baby
> You really wouldn't understand.





maddhatir said:


> Alice is a cool dude! I love his interviews he is always so tongue in cheek about everything! Have you ever seen him of the gold course, all decked out in his golf garb I love it.



Ah yes, Alice is THE MAN!  It was the summer between 8th & 9th grade, I was staying up late watching The Midnight Special & Don Kirshner's Rock Concert(anyone remember those shows?).  I saw Alice and it was love at first sight!  I went to KMART the next day and picked up my now favorite album (yes, that's vinyl), Welcome to my Nightmare.  I've been hooked ever since.  I've seen him often in concert and never get bored with his shows.  He's actually performing in town in August, unfortunately by then Summerfest will have eaten all of my music fund.  Maybe next year, I don't see him quitting the circuit any time soon.

*Madd:* I was listening to his syndicated show Friday night and he mentioned Ghost Hunters, he watchs it every Wednesday night.  Also, do you watch Paranormal State on A&E?  If you do, did you know that the psychic on the show, Chip Coffey has started his own show about "kids who see dead people," it's called Psychic Kids: Children of the Paranormal.  It aired for the first time last night on A&E.  If you have not seen Paranormal State, they are airing old episodes now (on Mondays) and will begin the second season the end of July.


----------



## TKDisneylover

PhotobearSam said:


> We live in a touristy town Shediac, New Brunswick, Canada. It's the Lobster Capitol of the World. We are known  for our beach "Parlee Beach"
> 
> We own 16 two bedroom chalets (cottages), 7 one bedroom suites, and 24 motel rooms. Here is our site so you can see what I mean... www.shediac.com/gaudet/
> We get a lot of weekly rentals and return customers.
> 
> To keep costs down, I am the only person who works the desk. I take every call, reservation, answer every email and check all customers in as well as do a lot of laundry...
> 
> It's not so bad...
> 
> We bought a lot of land across the street to build some more. We are looking at 30 more motel rooms, 12 more chalets, pool, hot-tub, etc etc...I want to turn it into a resort...
> 
> If anyone EVER comes to the east coast of Canada...LOOK me up, I have DISer rates.



You have a nice little business going there!  I would love to come up sometime and enjoy some Lobster and that beautiful beach (I checked it out on the Parlee Beach website).  You sure have your hands full with all the duties you are responsible for, thank goodness you have some down time to enjoy Disney!


----------



## TKDisneylover

PoohNTuck said:


> Rented some fun movies this week.  One of em was the new Jack Nicholson/Morgan Freeman flick "The Bucket List" about 2 terminally ill cancer patients who want to LIVE before they die.  Started thinking about my own personal bucket list in life... does anyone have a written bucket list?  Or just vague ideas of life adventures you want to have?  Or no idea- taking it day by day??
> 
> Just curious if anyone wants to share...
> 
> I'm always on the lookout for a new adventure but don't have a written list yet.



We have not seen that movie yet, but will definitely have to rent it.  And no written bucket list, but we definitely have our sights set on a few adventures before we retire "down south".  The Mediterranean & Ireland are definitely tops on our list of must-dos.  I would love to sky dive once in my lifetime, but have always feared I'd have a heart attack on the descent.   But, I'm not letting go of the possibility.  And we've never been to Vegas and would like to check that out sooner than later.



maddhatir said:


> ............who can say they lived in the USVI for 5 months, or went to Bermuda with 20 of their friends to get married,   have a Harley and love to ride , have a little sailboat and get to go sailing  (in a few weeks it will be ready) we are lucky we live by the ocean and many people have not even seen the ocean ......we don't have kids, so that keeps us *ab*normal....who wants to go through life thinking they are normal anyway....that's no fun
> 
> OMG- I just wanted to share this pic of my niece doing Karate! She is 6 and she will kicking some butt soon! I am SO proud of her and how "into" this she is! You can just tell my her face in this pic! She is LOCO! She was screaming like a wild banshee



You have done some wonderful things in your life already, totally cool!  Especially the beach wedding with friends, very nice!  DH & I eloped and then had a small reception when we returned.  For our 25th wedding anniversary (in 4 years), we would like to renew our vows on a beach.  Still not sure if we will head to Mexico for that or try to do something down in Gulf Shores where we plan to retire.  We would love to have family & friends come along so it may be cheaper to stay in the States.

And your niece is such a cutie-patootie!!  She's gonna be one tough chick someday!!  She definitely looks like she means business!!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Ah yes, Alice is THE MAN!  It was the summer between 8th & 9th grade, I was staying up late watching The Midnight Special & Don Kirshner's Rock Concert(anyone remember those shows?).  I saw Alice and it was love at first sight!  I went to KMART the next day and picked up my now favorite album (yes, that's vinyl), Welcome to my Nightmare.  I've been hooked ever since.  I've seen him often in concert and never get bored with his shows.  He's actually performing in town in August, unfortunately by then Summerfest will have eaten all of my music fund.  Maybe next year, I don't see him quitting the circuit any time soon.
> 
> *Madd:* I was listening to his syndicated show Friday night and he mentioned Ghost Hunters, he watches it every Wednesday night.  Also, do you watch Paranormal State on A&E?  If you do, did you know that the psychic on the show, Chip Coffey has started his own show about "kids who see dead people," it's called Psychic Kids: Children of the Paranormal.  It aired for the first time last night on A&E.  If you have not seen Paranormal State, they are airing old episodes now (on Mondays) and will begin the second season the end of July.



Oh yes! I remember _Don Kirshner's Rock Concert_! I used to have a tiny black and white TV next to my bed and had the volume low so I did not wake anyone I can't remember how old I was (I will be 44 next month) I used to watch that and the old, or should I say REAL _Saturday Night Live _on my TV. ahhh- Chevy Chase used to crack me up when he would walk out and trip Or when he was reading the news and he would say "Hello, I am Chevy Chase........ and you're not.........." I would crack up at that- and no one else thought it was funny 

I used to watch _Paranormal State_. I gave up. The stories were very good (much more interesting than _Ghost Hunters_ IMHO) but- they would do the investigation, which would be interesting, but they would say a prayer and that would be the end of it- the next day EVERYTHING seemed lighter... blah blah- give me a break. 

I have been DVRing _Ghost Hunters _and I am losing interest in that too- someone needs to be in these places for about a week and then report back to me. I find it funny when the owners say- well, if TAPS finds something then I will be a believer.... ugh.......TAPS rarely finds anything!

You know what show used to be good- the one when the family would stay overnight in some haunted place with the cameras- that was pretty good. It had that Scottish dude (I think he was Scottish) on it. And surprisingly, the MTV show that used to be on years ago *FEAR*- that was good!

And the one Linda Blair hosted. _Scariest Places on Earth_- with the little woman form Poltergeist narrating. I think that was her anyway.  

The shows now are pretty lame. 

But back to Chip Coffey- he cracks me up- he is so dramatic But I love him. DH would watch the show with me sometimes and I would say- Come on! This a job for CHIP! And that woman Loraine- she is always saying "honey" and "dear" she is cute. But the whole just _saying a prayer thing _ and everything is all peachy, does not cut it for me.


----------



## PhotobearSam

TKDisneylover said:


> You have a nice little business going there!  I would love to come up sometime and enjoy some Lobster and that beautiful beach (I checked it out on the Parlee Beach website).  You sure have your hands full with all the duties you are responsible for, thank goodness you have some down time to enjoy Disney!



Best part...I have off most of the winter except for collecting rents and paper work...I get to go to Florida for a month...PRICELESS... 


BTW, EVERYONE...I am serious about DISer rates...I would love to meet you all someday. If I ever win the lottery, wanna join me at WDW?


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Best part...I have off most of the winter except for collecting rents and paper work...I get to go to Florida for a month...PRICELESS...
> 
> 
> BTW, EVERYONE...I am serious about DISer rates...I would love to meet you all someday. If I ever win the lottery, wanna join me at WDW?



oooooo- NOW you are talking!!!! I am saving this e-mail in case I need to collect one day!


----------



## Liisa

maddhatir said:


> I told him- I do not want to be old and say- "I wish" so I told him ...7 YEARS! We have to decide something w/in the 7 years.



That is our philosophy too.  We have a mental list going.  We plan on doing an African Safari, getting to Paris, living somewhere outside of New England for a while (probably after we retire as neither one of us can leave our jobs), and spending a year going cross country in a motor home.  We remind ourselves every once in a while so that we don't lose sight of it.

All of you will appreciate this.  We just (hours ago) got back from WDW.  Saturday night we went to the Magic Kingdom around 9 pm - just to ride Big Thunder and Jungle Cruise (love doing those two after dark).  We get to Big Thunder (walk on - yippee) and this father is ahead of us, practically running through the line to get in his last few rides of the night.  He's holding this little boy (about 4 or 5) who doesn't seem so eager to go on the ride.  As they put us in our gates to get ready to board, the little boy starts really freaking out... hollering and crying "I don't want to ride.  Please I don't want to."  The father keeps trying to coax him into it... "it's fun.  You'll be fine."  etc, etc.  I just looked at DH - neither of us could believe this guy.    We all climb into the next train and pull the lap bar down.  Just before we take off, this female cast member comes over and says to the father - if he doesn't want to ride, we can't allow him to ride.  She pulls the two of them off the ride.  GOOD FOR HER!!!!  That poor little guy!

Just wanted to share.  I'm going to grab some dinner now and call it a night!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> All of you will appreciate this.  We just (hours ago) got back from WDW.  Saturday night we went to the Magic Kingdom around 9 pm - just to ride Big Thunder and Jungle Cruise (love doing those two after dark).  We get to Big Thunder (walk on - yippee) and this father is ahead of us, practically running through the line to get in his last few rides of the night.  He's holding this little boy (about 4 or 5) who doesn't seem so eager to go on the ride.  As they put us in our gates to get ready to board, the little boy starts really freaking out... hollering and crying "I don't want to ride.  Please I don't want to."  The father keeps trying to coax him into it... "it's fun.  You'll be fine."  etc, etc.  I just looked at DH - neither of us could believe this guy.    We all climb into the next train and pull the lap bar down.  Just before we take off, this female cast member comes over and says to the father - if he doesn't want to ride, we can't allow him to ride.  She pulls the two of them off the ride.  GOOD FOR HER!!!!  That poor little guy!
> 
> Just wanted to share.  I'm going to grab some dinner now and call it a night!



Welcome Home! or should it be  

You know what? I am so scared this is going to be my niece when me and SIL take her in a few months. Let me tell you- she acted that way for BUZZ LIGHTYEAR!,  IT'S A SMALL WORLD!!  and Soarin' BUT once she got on THEM- she could not wait to get back on! She was afraid to go on Pirates and we talked her into it and that is all she talks about now. 

I am afraid people will think we are toturing her, but she is a bit of a drama queen and she needs a little pushing....I SO want to take her on the HM and Big Thunder this time- but she will probably freak, but I know when she is on it- she will be fine. Same with Test Track.......

She is going to miss out on so many fun rides unless we commit some kind of _mental child abuse_    We will be getting asked to leave on every ride if she pulled the drama queen for every ride 

_What to do, what to do_!


----------



## Liisa

Madd,

I can't believe people will think you are abusing her... they don't know you like we do!     (just kidding)     She just sounds nervous and it seems that you can at least rationalize with her.  What if you showed her movies of some of the rides you want her to go on... I'll  bet you can find most of them on YouTube?  Might help her realize they aren't so bad. 

The little boy on Big Thunder was probably exhausted (after 9 pm for a 5 year old may have put him over the edge) and he seemed legitimately in a state of panic.   I think that is why the cast member stepped in.  We've seen plenty of crying kids dragged onto rides before with no interference.

One thing for sure - it made our ride MUCH quieter!!!!  Thank you Miss Cast Member!


----------



## maddhatir

Liisa said:


> Madd,
> 
> I can't believe people will think you are abusing her... they don't know you like we do!     (just kidding)     She just sounds nervous and it seems that you can at least rationalize with her.  *What if you showed her movies of some of the rides you want her to go on*... I'll  bet you can find most of them on YouTube?  Might help her realize they aren't so bad.



That is an awesome idea! 

SIL wants to surprise her with the news that we are going the morning we leave, but I can still just sit down with her beforehand and show her some of the rides for "next time"


----------



## zima-cheryl

JCandKT said:


> Hey all...
> 
> JC and I are trying to decide...
> 
> Mickey's Halloween Party or Cirque du Soliel La Nouba?



I'm just getting caught up... miss a few days & wow!
Sorry if this reply is a bit late, but if I had to pick one, it would be La Nouba, hands down!
(Of course I'm a Cirque addict so take that for what it is worth...  Any show w/in about a 100 mile radius & we are there!)

It is so amazing!  I just don't know how to describe it..  I will tell you even after seeing shows multiple times I still find myself saying "Wow" out loud, holding my breath or grabbing DH's hand.  The beauty, skill and elegance of the performers makes them a don't miss!

You may also want to check out this podcast about the parties:
http://www.wdwtoday.com/
Specifically I think show 172.  They didn't seem very impressed w/any of the extra parties that happen.


----------



## zima-cheryl

PoohNTuck said:


> I love reading about everyone's fave places to stay.  I had a miserable experience with an ex at the Hyatt in Cancun and had sworn off Mexico (although I really enjoyed Isla Mujeres).  Perhaps we will try again someday in response to all the glowing reviews here.  You guys do it for so cheap!
> 
> We usually travel approx 2 weeks at a time and like to include some international destinations.  Love cruising.  Our trips cost 4-5k but we eat lots and see lots and I always budget for it and stay within the budget which makes me feel good.
> 
> I'd like to hit every continent with DH sometime in the next few years.  Guess it will depend on how the US dollar fares!



You should definately give Mexico another chance.  Madd is right - the people there are just sooo friendly!

We loved Cancun so much we committed to a time share (every other year for 30 years).  The sun, the blue sea, the food...  And there is as much, or as little as you want to do.  We have spent weeks climbing Myan pyramids & snorkling (got home so tired we needed a vacation after our vacation); and other weeks laying on a Turkish Bed by the ocean doing nothing but reading & napping!   

Isla Mujeres was awesome - DH spent 99% of his day drinking in a hammock (we were at Garaffon Park on the island) and I spent my day snorkling & exploring.  Except for the boat ride  it was a wonderful day!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> One doc I went to scared me to death with everything that "could" happen to be b/c of my problem.He told me if I do not get the shot I can end up paralized eventually, lose bowel funtions etc!   Won't be going back to him anymore!
> 
> But the Physiatrist from Univ. of Penn- told me, yes, that can happen to SOME people, but not all! I liked his answer better! I will stick with him.
> 
> Don't forget about us!




Don't you love when they scare you like that? 
I remember when I had my Lasik done... the nurse was nice enough to point out while only something like 2% of people actually go blind after the surgery, but of course if you are one of the 2% is it really 100% for you. 
 

I guess maybe they feel legally they have to point these things out to you?  But really... the bedside manor sometimes is just unbelievable!

(I really need to learn the trick to quoting multiple posts in one reply...don't I?)


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Oh yes! I remember _Don Kirshner's Rock Concert_! I used to have a tiny black and white TV next to my bed and had the volume low so I did not wake anyone I can't remember how old I was (I will be 44 next month) I used to watch that and the old, or should I say REAL _Saturday Night Live _on my TV. ahhh- Chevy Chase used to crack me up when he would walk out and trip Or when he was reading the news and he would say "Hello, I am Chevy Chase........ and you're not.........." I would crack up at that- and no one else thought it was funny



Okay it's been verified, we are both 44 and children of the 80's!  Well late 70's/80's.  And I loved Saturday Night Live then, it was the funniest, now it's pretty boring IMHO.  Gilda Radner was my fav, Rosanne Rosannadanna (not sure if that's how the name was, but you get my drift), was a great character along with Chevy doing the news.  Jim Bulushi, Dan Akroyd, and all the others were fantastic comedians.



> I used to watch _Paranormal State_. I gave up. The stories were very good (much more interesting than _Ghost Hunters_ IMHO) but- they would do the investigation, which would be interesting, but they would say a prayer and that would be the end of it- the next day EVERYTHING seemed lighter... blah blah- give me a break.
> 
> I have been DVRing _Ghost Hunters _and I am losing interest in that too- someone needs to be in these places for about a week and then report back to me. I find it funny when the owners say- well, if TAPS finds something then I will be a believer.... ugh.......TAPS rarely finds anything!



I agree with you about Paranormal State, they did have interesting stories and I'm also noticing the are visiting some of the same places that were visited by TAPS.  But your right, the prayer thing is weird.

And my DH and I were just saying how it seems like TAPS doesn't spend enough time at each place.  It's like they are there for a few hours and then it's time to load up.  And honestly, when they show the dudes going over the tapes it seems like they are barely paying attention.  What could they be missing because they are sleeping on the job!

Have you watched the Ghost Hunters International?



> You know what show used to be good- the one when the family would stay overnight in some haunted place with the cameras- that was pretty good. It had that Scottish dude (I think he was Scottish) on it. And surprisingly, the MTV show that used to be on years ago *FEAR*- that was good!
> 
> And the one Linda Blair hosted. _Scariest Places on Earth_- with the little woman form Poltergeist narrating. I think that was her anyway.


 
Now your talkin', I LOVED these shows!!  I wish they would do them again!  I've seen them repeat some of the Scariest Places recently, so I'm hoping maybe they will bring them back.  It almost seemed like they had Linda Blair "rehosting", she looked a little different.  You could tell that they had edited her into the old episodes or something.  And I liked MTV's FEAR too, that's another good one.  Something about them having the cameras attached as they would go out on their little missions, made you feel more like you were experiencing something.  There was a lot more of a fear factor with those type of shows.



> But back to Chip Coffey- he cracks me up- he is so dramatic But I love him. DH would watch the show with me sometimes and I would say- Come on! This a job for CHIP! And that woman Loraine- she is always saying "honey" and "dear" she is cute. But the whole just _saying a prayer thing _ and everything is all peachy, does not cut it for me.



We'll have to see how Chip's show does.  I DVR'd it for DH and he watched it last night and thought it was interesting.


----------



## TKDisneylover

PhotobearSam said:


> Best part...I have off most of the winter except for collecting rents and paper work...I get to go to Florida for a month...PRICELESS...
> 
> 
> BTW, EVERYONE...I am serious about DISer rates...I would love to meet you all someday. If I ever win the lottery, wanna join me at WDW?



A month in Flordia!  SWEET!  I would love to take a month vacation sometime, I have four weeks now, but I can't imagine using it all up at once.  I have to save some for SUMMERFEST (as I've talked about in previous posts), and of course during the Christmas holiday because we always have family over and like to have everything just so in my home.

I'll remember the DISer rate for sure, nothing like getting away to Canada during the summer months!  Thanks for the offer!   And we'll definitely join you at WDW if you win the lottery, or even if our vacation weeks overlap it would be great to get together at the Adventurer's Club or something.  What month do you guys typically schedule your WDW trips?


----------



## PhotobearSam

TKDisneylover said:


> I'll remember the DISer rate for sure, nothing like getting away to Canada during the summer months!  Thanks for the offer!   And we'll definitely join you at WDW if you win the lottery, or even if our vacation weeks overlap it would be great to get together at the Adventurer's Club or something.  What month do you guys typically schedule your WDW trips?





I love the Adventurer's Club....That would be awesome. We are looking at January fro trips from now on...Maybe into early Feb...
I bought a ticket...If I win, I will have to call my Favorite Child-free DISers...


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> (I really need to learn the trick to quoting multiple posts in one reply...don't I?)



OMG it is SO easy!

Just look right next to the (quote) button on the bottom right of the post- it has a " and a +- if you want to quote 3 people, just click on that for each post you want to quote- however, the last person you want to quote- hit the (quote) button for that post and it will then include all the little "+ that you chose!

Boy! I hope that did not end up confusing you???


----------



## Mayhem2008

Just checking in with you all so you don't think I've poofed.. 
I've been uber busy and haven't had much time to get on here lately...I'll get caught up hopefully, tomorrow afternoon. In the meantime have a great evening and take care!


----------



## maddhatir

OK- this is a perfect topic for us CF people......I took off of work and guess where *I* am going tomorrow??????

You will all love this one.........TO A KINDERGARTEN GRADUATION! 

I love, love, love, love my little niece to death, so of course I would love to see her do anything, and this is not about her

......but what  me is, that ANY kindergarten class should even have a graduation!!!

I said to DH "kindergarten!? Call me when you graduate COLLEGE. Now that is a reason to celebrate!" (I skipped right over high school.....that does not impress me either )


----------



## Clotho

I think "moving on" ceremonies are fun for the parents. But I would never expect anyone else to attend. And "graduation" sounds a little much for anything below high school.

I think it's great you "blew past high school", but that is an important ceremony for a lot of people. Not everyone goes to college, and not everyone who does graduates. It is more a rite of passage into adulthood in our culture than anything, and I think it's important. But below that, I am not sure what anyone thinks it symbolizes? So strange this trend!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Clotho said:


> I think "moving on" ceremonies are fun for the parents. But I would never expect anyone else to attend. And "graduation" sounds a little much for anything below high school.



I have a great example for this topic.  We received a card in the mail from my cousin's daughter about her graduating.  Now I only see this cousin once a year for a family picnic and we actually had not seen him & his family the last two years as his family had a vacation planned one year & a funeral to attend the other.  So when we received this card with her picture on it saying she "graduated", I thought to myself how time has flown by and that I didn't think she was old enough yet to be graduating high school.  Well silly me, she graduated 8th grade and they were having this big party for her!

I agree that the high school graduation is sufficient for these types of parties and get togethers, but 8th grade, that's something that should be celebrated with close family members.  After I had spoke with a few other family members and determined she was only graduating 8th grade, I felt that the $25.00 check I mailed as a gift because I could not attend was not justified.  Am I just being cheap feeling this way or would you have also sent money?

I have to say I kinda feel like a dork now.


----------



## PhotobearSam

TKDisneylover said:


> I have a great example for this topic.  We received a card in the mail from my cousin's daughter about her graduating.  Now I only see this cousin once a year for a family picnic and we actually had not seen him & his family the last two years as his family had a vacation planned one year & a funeral to attend the other.  So when we received this card with her picture on it saying she "graduated", I thought to myself how time has flown by and that I didn't think she was old enough yet to be graduating high school.  Well silly me, she graduated 8th grade and they were having this big party for her!
> 
> I agree that the high school graduation is sufficient for these types of parties and get togethers, but 8th grade, that's something that should be celebrated with close family members.  After I had spoke with a few other family members and determined she was only graduating 8th grade, I felt that the $25.00 check I mailed as a gift because I could not attend was not justified.  Am I just being cheap feeling this way or would you have also sent money?
> 
> I have to say I kinda feel like a dork now.





I so agree that 8th grade should be Mom Dad, siblings and grandparents only...This is going too far.

The only GRADUATION I had were a lot of people came was high school. This is getting ridiculous. Seems like a gift grab to me.


I am completely convinced that we reward mediocrity way too often in this world. Why does everyone have to get a ribbon. Why does every kid get to play in leagues after the age of 10...why do we celebrate grade 8th graduation? Are children not supposed to be able to pass the 8th grade?



We are (well not us as we don't have kids) producing a generation of self-absorbed, feeble minded, weak individuals. The don't cooperate well with other, have no work ethic, and are just downright RUDE and boring. There is no individuality in any of them.

A friend of mine who manages a Photolab in a huge grocery store told me yesterday that one of her 19 yr old employees  complained that she had to work an 8 hr shift. My friend asked her What's wrong with that?. The kid answered that "It's a really long shift and she does not know IF she can do it...but she will try"
What kind of world are we coming to. I routinely work 12 plus hours a day...What a coddled twit. Her parents have done her a grave injustice by LETTING her become like that. It's disgusting.


----------



## TKDisneylover

PhotobearSam said:


> We are (well not us as we don't have kids) producing a generation of self-absorbed, feeble minded, weak individuals. The don't cooperate well with other, have no work ethic, and are just downright RUDE and boring. There is no individuality in any of them.
> 
> What kind of world are we coming to. I routinely work 12 plus hours a day...What a coddled twit. Her parents have done her a grave injustice by LETTING her become like that. It's disgusting.



Oh this is all so true!  I can't believe how many teens say there are no jobs out there for them, and then you mention the jobs available in the fast food/restaurant business, well they can't do *that* kind of work!"  And I had recently read an article about the future of employment in the United States, stating that employers will need to make the job "appealing" to the younger applicant so they will want to work for the company with all the perks included.

I can remember working at Arby's fast food restaurant when I was a teenager and I begged for as many hours as I could get.  At times they had to refuse me because I was "over" hours for my age!  Of course I payed for my own car, my car insurance, and all of my own clothes.  My parents could not afford to pay for all of the luxuries that many parents pay for their kids now.  They also could not afford to send us to college so my dad always said, learn as many different skills as you can and work as hard as you can because the employer will be more apt to keep you over someone else is who didn't have as strong a work ethic.  I have to tell you that I have many skills under my belt which include customer service, cooking, welding, punch press, packaging, and 12-head embroidery operation.  I started taking night school courses for clerical work because I didn't want to be in a machine shop all my life.  I started working for an attorney after I got out of school and then applied for a clerical position with the County.  Thankfully they hired me and 21-years later, 4 weeks vacation, and 12 sick days a year (which are accumulative to 900), I'm pretty happy and hoping to retire in 9 more years.

Okay, I guess that may have been TMI, but I was on a roll .


----------



## Poppinsme

Hey everybody! 
And heres my Bulldog pics of "Buddy" who we adopted from Bulldog rescue.





















 Our other dog Bruno.





 Our 5 horses.


----------



## Liisa

Poppinsme said:


>




Poppinsme,

I Love Him!!!  He's got that look that just makes you want to squish him in a big hug.  What a little ham.

What breed is your other dog?  He (edited to read he: Bruno, of course it's a "he") is gorgeous... of course, I've always been partial to black dogs as my first was a big black bear!   

Thanks soooo much for sharing.  

Liisa


----------



## Quiksilvr

PhotobearSam said:


> I so agree that 8th grade should be Mom Dad, siblings and grandparents only...This is going too far.
> 
> The only GRADUATION I had were a lot of people came was high school. This is getting ridiculous. Seems like a gift grab to me.
> 
> 
> I am completely convinced that we reward mediocrity way too often in this world. Why does everyone have to get a ribbon. Why does every kid get to play in leagues after the age of 10...why do we celebrate grade 8th graduation? Are children not supposed to be able to pass the 8th grade?
> 
> 
> 
> We are (well not us as we don't have kids) producing a generation of self-absorbed, feeble minded, weak individuals. The don't cooperate well with other, have no work ethic, and are just downright RUDE and boring. There is no individuality in any of them.



I don't mean to jump in on your conversation, but I agree with this 100%.  I didn't have this continual congratulation for doing the minimum when I was a kid and I think my self-esteem turned out fine.  I just don't see the point of having parties for every little thing that comes along.  Some of my extended family is like that and it drives me crazy.  I refuse to participate in those shenanigans.  I'm also not buying some snot-nosed, generally sullen or ungrateful child an 8th-grade "graduation" present.  It's not like I owe them anything.  If it's a graduation, let's see the degree.  If there is a degree, then I'll cough up some cash.  

I don't recall having a party for myself when I graduated from high school or college.  My family and I went out for dinner on graduation day and that was about the extent of it.  The only graduation party I've ever had was for graduating law school and I don't think I'm being selfish if I say I think I deserved one for that particular achievement.  

I think people just want excuses to heap praise upon their children even if their children don't really deserve it.


----------



## JEmaryland

TKDisneylover said:


> Oh this is all so true!  I can't believe how many teens say there are no jobs out there for them, and then you mention the jobs available in the fast food/restaurant business, well they can't do *that* kind of work!"  And I had recently read an article about the future of employment in the United States, stating that employers will need to make the job "appealing" to the younger applicant so they will want to work for the company with all the perks included.
> 
> I can remember working at Arby's fast food restaurant when I was a teenager and I begged for as many hours as I could get.  At times they had to refuse me because I was "over" hours for my age!  Of course I payed for my own car, my car insurance, and all of my own clothes.  My parents could not afford to pay for all of the luxuries that many parents pay for their kids now.  They also could not afford to send us to college so my dad always said, learn as many different skills as you can and work as hard as you can because the employer will be more apt to keep you over someone else is who didn't have as strong a work ethic.  I have to tell you that I have many skills under my belt which include customer service, cooking, welding, punch press, packaging, and 12-head embroidery operation.  I started taking night school courses for clerical work because I didn't want to be in a machine shop all my life.  I started working for an attorney after I got out of school and then applied for a clerical position with the County.  Thankfully they hired me and 21-years later, 4 weeks vacation, and 12 sick days a year (which are accumulative to 900), I'm pretty happy and hoping to retire in 9 more years.
> 
> Okay, I guess that may have been TMI, but I was on a roll .



You are totally correct.
And it's not just kids either, it's young adults, too!
I was just talking to a friend of mine from high school today. We're both 23, he'll be 24 in 2 months. This guy is still living with his grandparents (they raised him) and relying soley on them for money because he "can't find a job". I'm sorry, but with every fast food restaurant posting huge signs that they are hiring, I find it hard to believe no one will hire you. I worked tons of crappy jobs since I was 14, and for 3 1/2 years I've been in a very nice career that allows me to live comfortably on my own. People just expect things to be handed to them.


----------



## Poppinsme

Liisa said:


> Poppinsme,
> 
> I Love Him!!!  He's got that look that just makes you want to squish him in a big hug.  What a little ham.
> 
> What breed is your other dog?  He (edited to read he: Bruno, of course it's a "he") is gorgeous... of course, I've always been partial to black dogs as my first was a big black bear!
> 
> Thanks soooo much for sharing.
> 
> Liisa



Oh thank you so much. 
Bruno is a 10 year old pound puppy.  He is husky, chow and labrador.  Bruno is a loving, sweet and fabulous guard dog.     
He is our big fur bear.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I felt that the $25.00 check I mailed as a gift because I could not attend was not justified.  Am I just being cheap feeling this way or would you have also sent money?
> 
> I have to say I kinda feel like a dork now.



25 bucks is plenty for a kid that you never see! Don't you dare feel like a dork! 

I gave my niece Shel Silverstein's "Where the Sidewalk Ends" for her kindergarten graduation. Come on? Why does that warrant a cash prize!?


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> We are (well not us as we don't have kids) producing a generation of self-absorbed, feeble minded, weak individuals. The don't cooperate well with other, have no work ethic, and are just downright RUDE and boring. There is no individuality in any of them.



I wonder if some parents have a clue what they are doing to our future 

Today I was shopping in Bath and Body. There was a woman in there pushing a baby in a stroller, her son was about 7 and her daughter was maybe 9 or 10. Well, the whole STINKING time I was looking arounf (it was about a half hour b/c they were aving a great sale) her kids were wacking each other with these freaking squeeky rubber duckies they sold in the store!!! The squeeking was NON STOP! And the mother??????, oh- she was freaking OBLIVIOUS to the noise!!

I wanted to poke my eyes out!


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> I wonder if some parents have a clue what they are doing to our future
> 
> Today I was shopping in Bath and Body. There was a woman in there pushing a baby in a stroller, her son was about 7 and her daughter was maybe 9 or 10. Well, the whole STINKING time I was looking arounf (it was about a half hour b/c they were aving a great sale) her kids were wacking each other with these freaking squeeky rubber duckies they sold in the store!!! The squeeking was NON STOP! And the mother??????, oh- she was freaking OBLIVIOUS to the noise!!
> 
> I wanted to poke my eyes out!




I have been known to tell the parents..."I don't apprecaite to have to listen to that. Make them Stop"...I have yet to have a parent tell me to mind my own business...but if they ever do I have the greatest come back line "I would if you just minded yours better"

Once in a store where this 2 to 3 yr old girl screamed for 15 minutes "I want it now!!!" at the top of her lungs I went to the mother and said "Shut her up...we don't need to hear how awful your parenting skills are" It was a top of the lungs, high pitched, screams...The mother acted like it was normal.



another time I told the parent to "Shut it up or take it home" after witnessing a parent LET her child take item after item from the shelves at Walmart and smash them to the floor screaming "I want it I want it" while the mother just walked away oblivious. It was not like the mother looked embarrassed or was trying to call the child down. She could not be bothered.

Now I am not saying that everyone who has children is like this...My brother would rather die than have his kids act that way and most of my friends are really good too.


Has anyone noticed when calling friends who have children, that they let their children Scream in the background while they are on the phone? When I was a kid, the second my parents got on the phone, we HAD to shut up. We only got one warning and then we would be punished.

Also, I have seen adults watching whatever their child wants to watch...I cannot imagine my Dad watching Sesame Street instead of CNN just because we wanted to watch it. People now give their kids too much power.

I called an employee a few years ago to come to work earlier but when I called her Dad said she was asleep. It's was 11 am. If my boss would have called me when I was 17 at 11 am, my Mom would have woke me. PERIOD. It does not matter how late I got in or how tired I was. She would have not come into my room and gingerly whispered for me to wake up...she would have stormed into my room and kicked my bed and said "Your boss is on the phone, GET UP!" It taught me that "Even if you don't like it, you made a commitment to that job and you have to follow through"

One of the parcel boys at our grocery store had his mom tell us that 2 shifts a week were his maximum because he was going to get too tired...It was summer...his shifts were 4 to 5 hours long...TIRED!?!?!?!? 

If I had to go back to high school now, I would have to become a lesbian or a nun. There is not one teenage boy MANLY enough for me to have even considered dating. They don't dress well, they hardly wash, nobody knows how to use a comb and they are soooooo lazy.

I dated everyone from the class jock to the metal head and they all could whip this generations assets all over school. I want to feel SAFE and secure when with a man, these kids could not protect a flee.

RANT OVER....just having a bad day.


----------



## maddhatir

OH NO Sam! How can you already be having a bad day!!!? Hope it gets better as the day goes on!

That is funny that you say those things to parents! I think I would just see black and lose it and say the wrong thing that may include a few words that start with F.....throw in a few B's for the mom etc 

You know, when I hang out with my SIL (I love her to death!) she will tell me about some of the kid's shows or sing kid's songs like I am aware of what's going on!? I will give her a puzzled look and she will say- "you never heard of that?" WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD I??? And thank god that I do not work that crap into my conversations ( did I mention- I love her to death )

I can actually say those things to her and she does not mind- she just laughs.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Poppinsme said:


> Hey everybody!
> And heres my Bulldog pics of "Buddy" who we adopted from Bulldog rescue.



Your kids are beautiful!  And congrats again on your new addition Buddy, he looks like he's very happy in his new home!



Quiksilvr said:


> I don't mean to jump in on your conversation, but I agree with this 100%.
> 
> I don't recall having a party for myself when I graduated from high school or college.  My family and I went out for dinner on graduation day and that was about the extent of it.  The only graduation party I've ever had was for graduating law school and I don't think I'm being selfish if I say I think I deserved one for that particular achievement.
> 
> I think people just want excuses to heap praise upon their children even if their children don't really deserve it.



Jump in anytime, everyone is welcome here to give their opinion!

Our family did the same type of celebrating as yours, as each of us graduated we would get together at the restaurant of our choice for dinner with just the 5 of us.

And your right, you did accomplish a huge achievement when graduating law school!  Congrats and good job!  



JEmaryland said:


> You are totally correct.
> And it's not just kids either, it's young adults, too!
> I was just talking to a friend of mine from high school today. We're both 23, he'll be 24 in 2 months. This guy is still living with his grandparents (they raised him) and relying soley on them for money because he "can't find a job". I'm sorry, but with every fast food restaurant posting huge signs that they are hiring, I find it hard to believe no one will hire you. I worked tons of crappy jobs since I was 14, and for 3 1/2 years I've been in a very nice career that allows me to live comfortably on my own. People just expect things to be handed to them.



That's just pathetic, living at home and living off the grandparents!!  Get a frickin' job and make your own living dude!

The part about not being able to find a job when you see signs everywhere makes me think of another topic, HOME FORECLOSURE!  I know some people can get in over their heads, and some loan companies have given people loans that they actually could not afford, but I am amazed at the amount of foreclosures that I see listed in the newspaper.  Why is it that when people start feeling financial pressure that they do not get a second job or put their property up for sale so that they do not lose everything they've got?  Now I understand also that it's been a tough market to sell in, but if it means losing the home completely to the bank wouldn't you come down on the price enough to make it appealing to any buyer?  Or try to increase your income to hang on to it?  Just a thought....



maddhatir said:


> 25 bucks is plenty for a kid that you never see! Don't you dare feel like a dork!



THANK YOU!  




PhotobearSam said:


> I have been known to tell the parents..."I don't apprecaite to have to listen to that. Make them Stop"...I have yet to have a parent tell me to mind my own business...but if they ever do I have the greatest come back line "I would if you just minded yours better"
> 
> Once in a store where this 2 to 3 yr old girl screamed for 15 minutes "I want it now!!!" at the top of her lungs I went to the mother and said "Shut her up...we don't need to hear how awful your parenting skills are" It was a top of the lungs, high pitched, screams...The mother acted like it was normal.
> 
> another time I told the parent to "Shut it up or take it home" after witnessing a parent LET her child take item after item from the shelves at Walmart and smash them to the floor screaming "I want it I want it" while the mother just walked away oblivious. It was not like the mother looked embarrassed or was trying to call the child down. She could not be bothered.



Sorry to hear your having a bad day, but *YOU GO GIRL*!!   I wish I had the guts to say some of the things you do.  However, you have given me the incentive to possibly do it the next time we are seated next to a family with screaming children at a restaurant! 

And your statements also remind me of one of my best friends from high school that I still keep in touch with.  Her big pet peeve are people who do not wash their hands in public restrooms.  She will wait for them to get to the exit door and then loudly say, "don't you think you should wash your hands after using the bathroom!?"   

I hope your day gets better!


----------



## maddhatir

Real quick- I thought this was funny- my SIL just e-mailed me. She always give me an update on the kiddies and tells me some of the funny things they say.

She said her little guy- he is 3 woke up today and told her...... that he learned some new "tongue tricks"  OK! HOW can she NOT make a comment about that!?

I HAD to e-mail her back and ask if he had gotten into mommy and daddy's _private_ DVD stash! (of course, I used another word instead of private )

I said to her- you are trying to send me a sweet e-mail and I just have to turn it to SMUT! 

*Poppinsme* your pups are adorable! I love the way bulldogs walk or should I say...waddle - they look like they are saying- "I AM COMING THROUGH PEOPLE.....MOVE IT OR LOSE IT!"

and welcome* JEmaryland *and *Quiksilvr*, as TKDisneylover mentioned, jump in anytime! We love to know there are "others" out there like us! Sit a spell!

Some people think we are evil- but we think we are just....lucky!


----------



## PhotobearSam

TKDisneylover said:


> Sorry to hear your having a bad day, but *YOU GO GIRL*!!   I wish I had the guts to say some of the things you do.  However, you have given me the incentive to possibly do it the next time we are seated next to a family with screaming children at a restaurant!




I have also commented to people with pleasant children. I have given out Disney Trading Pins to a lot of well behaved kids at the parks. Once I heard a kid ask his Mom why is that lady over there not getting her son to stop screaming...I gave that kid 2 pins. One for behaving and one for knowing that the other child was not behaving...LOL

Parents really appreciate it when they get compliments on their children's good behavior. It feels good.

Now at a table with a screaming child next to us, I ask to be moved...PERIOD. I will not let that ruin a meal I am paying good money for.

BTW, my day is now a bit better.


----------



## maddhatir

Hey Tammy (aka TKDisneylover )

Have you seen this thread on the DIS?? It is a *Ghost Hunters* thread??
http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1825653

I subbed to it in hopes I would get around to reading it- but I still have not been over there yet!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Hey Tammy (aka TKDisneylover )
> 
> Have you seen this thread on the DIS?? It is a *Ghost Hunters* thread??
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1825653
> 
> I subbed to it in hopes I would get around to reading it- but I still have not been over there yet!




Hey, how the heck did you come across that thread?!  Very interesting.  I will have to sub myself and see what's up.  I read a few of the first posts and was surprised to see this:



> Well, I hear that Sci-Fi has been pushing for more action, which is been causing alot of supposedly "set up" scares, which is the main reason you don't see as many house investigations as in previous years. I also heard that Sci-Fi told Jay and Grant that they wanted a better looking girl for the show, and they chose Kris for them. As you can see here, she's been an actress before they put her on the show http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1366043/ She even has a cameo in the new movie 21.
> 
> Brian Harnois explained how he was asked to leave the cast because they weren't Ghost hunting, they were rating hunting. He joined GHI which has no affiliation with taps which many people think they do along with Andy and Donna. They focus more on the paranormal which the show has lost track of since it's way over produced. These people were in it for the research, not the money like it has come to. There have been many other experiences where Jason and Grant are arrogant when you meet them and other stories which make it seem that Jay and Grant have HUGE egos. I've read this on numerous sites, i've also read different stories too which favor them. But Kris just didn't seem right from the beggining, and I tend to believe that story more than others.



I had no idea Kris was an actress!  

I'm looking forward to GH International (new season begins 7/9) to see what else they come up with in other countries.  I'm loving that they are checking out all the old castles.  And not to mention I sorta have a thing for Barry (love me some irsh accent!), but I was bummed when he shaved his head, but I do like the little chin beard he has (or whatever it's called) so I'll keep watching.

Did you get a chance to catch this weeks episode of Paranormal kids on A&E with Chip Coffey?

On another subject, Summerfest begins today.  It's all over the news this morning, and of course the weather has gone from mid-70's and pleasant (dry) to upper 80's and humid & sticky.  But I'm excited because we snagged some pretty good last minute tickets for RUSH.  They are (facing) left stage side, 12th row, center.  I'm pretty pumped about the seats, DH usually does not want to put out the cash for the better seats but this time he just said, "buy 'em, and let Mickey pay for them".  That means use the Disney Visa Card so we can earn some more Disney Dollars for our next trip (as yet to be planned).  The Amphitheatre is an open air venue and they are predicting rain to come through right around the time the concert begins (tomorrow night, 7:30 p.m.).  Thank goodness our seats will be covered!

And I'm on vacation from work for the next 11 days!  Woo Hoo!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Hey, how the heck did you come across that thread?!  Very interesting.  I will have to sub myself and see what's up.



Oh well- when I get _REALLY_ bored I head on over to the CB to see what's up over there! 




> I had no idea Kris was an actress!
> 
> I'm looking forward to GH International (new season begins 7/9) to see what else they come up with in other countries.  I'm loving that they are checking out all the old castles.  And not to mention I sorta have a thing for Barry (love me some irsh accent!), but I was bummed when he shaved his head, but I do like the little chin beard he has (or whatever it's called) so I'll keep watching.
> 
> Did you get a chance to catch this weeks episode of Paranormal kids on A&E with Chip Coffey?
> 
> On another subject, Summerfest begins today.  It's all over the news this morning, and of course the weather has gone from mid-70's and pleasant (dry) to upper 80's and humid & sticky.  But I'm excited because we snagged some pretty good last minute tickets for RUSH.  They are (facing) left stage side, 12th row, center.  I'm pretty pumped about the seats, DH usually does not want to put out the cash for the better seats but this time he just said, "buy 'em, and let Mickey pay for them".  That means use the Disney Visa Card so we can earn some more Disney Dollars for our next trip (as yet to be planned).  The Amphitheatre is an open air venue and they are predicting rain to come through right around the time the concert begins (tomorrow night, 7:30 p.m.).  Thank goodness our seats will be covered!
> 
> And I'm on vacation from work for the next 11 days!  Woo Hoo!



Yay! Vacation! DH wanted to take off July 2nd and 3rd. He wanted to put his boat in the water on the 2nd- I said HELLOOOOOOO!? No can do! We have the Type O concert that day! I will not take any chances of him not making it back in time to get to the concert- uh-uh- no way!

I HATE the shore on the holidays anyway- ugh! Why do people feel compelled to be part of the herd I will never know! "well- it's a holiday so we MUST have to go down the shore!" let's go on the boardwalk where there are SO many people you can't move  IT'S A HOLIDAY!- sorry for the mini-rant.

I have not gotten around to see Chip- I still have so many GHs on my DVR I have to catch up with! I watched the one last night about the haunted house in CT- that was pretty interesting. I would like to live in a haunted house. Or- right next to a cemetery! I would love to convert an old church into a house!

I did not know that chick was an actress, and let me tell you- she is not a good one She can't even _act_ _natural_  

I will set my DVR for DH International- there will be no more room for anything else to tape! 

I am not familiar with Barry? I Googled him, but he does not look familiar. Wow- I wonder if all of those people that will be on that show had a falling out with Jason and Grant? I was wondering where Donna went! Jason seems like he can be a .......jerk... Not too sure about Grant. 

I like Steve and Dave Tango. Dave Tango is from the area, that is why they investigated the Burlington County Prison. 

I have been wanting to go to there for years, even before TAPS existed!  It is about 20 minutes from my house. So close, but I have not made it there yet!  

 I also spent the night @ Fort Mifflin when I used to be part of a hunting group. I did not experience anything though.  But it was cool to spend the night. 

I have also been to the Eastern State Penitentiary- DH and I did an audio tour- It was nice b/c it was during the week and no one was there! We were alone most of the time (or WERE we! )

Have fun at the concert- the way the weathermen have been calling the weather lately- you can probably expect SUNSHINE all day! What IS their problem!?


----------



## WDWguru

Hey guys - sorry to duplicate posts but I figured you all might be interested and didn't know if you'd wander out to the other parts of the board.

As many of you know, about a year ago I finished my circuit of every Disney park in the world. I actually hit them all within 10 months! I work for a newspaper, so I churned out a story for our travel section this weekend. We put the story up early online so I figured I'd share with you all! 
Be sure to check out the chart I did with all the stats, and you can click on the link in the box to see some photos.

Enjoy! http://www.sltrib.com/travel/ci_9701000


----------



## zima-cheryl

PhotobearSam said:


> I have also commented to people with pleasant children. I have given out Disney Trading Pins to a lot of well behaved kids at the parks. Once I heard a kid ask his Mom why is that lady over there not getting her son to stop screaming...I gave that kid 2 pins. One for behaving and one for knowing that the other child was not behaving...LOL
> 
> Parents really appreciate it when they get compliments on their children's good behavior. It feels good.



We do that too.  ANYONE now days who takes the time to be a good parent deserves the complement.  Plus I think the kids respond too.  Somehow praise from an unexpected, unknown person seems to encourage more of the same good behavior (at least that is how I've seen my nieces & nephews respond).

I also have to give *HUGE *props to my SIL who is not afraid to lay down the law, leave a restaurant or park when necessary.  Boy when she says shape up or else... or else means going back to the hotel all day while the rest of the family is at Magic Kingdom (yup.. happened once; and just once to my niece... the other 4 figured it out really quick!)


----------



## zima-cheryl

TKDisneylover said:


> ...
> and some loan companies have given people loans that they actually could not afford, ....



It isn't just the "evil" lenders...  How many people do you know who walked in, saw the immediate monthly payment & signed on the line?  Then when their ARM is adjusted they cry "woe is me!"

I guess I feel there s/be a little more pesonal responsibility around.  Read the paperwork, learn the differnece between ARM & fixed, balloon payments, prepayent penalties, etc.
I realize I'm borderline obsessive-compulsive, but I read every page of our mortgage agreement w/in the 3 day window we had to bail w/out penalty.  Asked questions & knew exactly what we were getting into.

Sorry... this is just one of my pet peeves....  We save, scratch & get into a house we can afford *and *still afford to save for retirement & now the government is talking about bailing all these homeowners out.  They aren't entitled to those big McMansions.  I say if you screwed up...too bad!  Caveat Emptor.  

I will say if someone got screwed over by a dishonest mortgage company they s/be able to sue the pants off them.  But I don't think that is the case most of the time.

OK -- Rant over.


----------



## JCandKT

hey guys... just me!
haven't posted on this board in awhile.

wanted to share some news. 

I've started a new job after being laid-off from my last job of 9 years.  I'm now working at a radio station in downtown Indy - my DREAM job since I was a kid!  I actually voiced my first commercial the other day!  It was awesome.

I've been nominated to the National Honor Society of Collegiate Scholars - what an accomplishment... Of course, when I tell my dad this he says "wow, maybe if you hadn't screwed up in college the first time you'd be in a better position in life now."

No congrats, no good job...just let's bring up the past.  Jerk.

Planning our next trip to WDW in September to celebrate 7 years... hard to believe...

Saw Wall-E last night - loved it, and the short beforehand was great! 

That's all - just wanted to pop in on my original thread!

love you guys!


----------



## LoraJ

I'm really unhappy about Disney's decision to close the clubs on PI. I guess any hope of an adult's only hotel goes out the window. Ugh! None of the clubs at Boardwalk appeal to my DH 

Wish they would move the Adventurers Club to where Atlantic Dance Hall is.


----------



## zima-cheryl

LoraJ said:


> I'm really unhappy about Disney's decision to close the clubs on PI. I guess any hope of an adult's only hotel goes out the window. Ugh! None of the clubs at Boardwalk appeal to my DH
> 
> Wish they would move the Adventurers Club to where Atlantic Dance Hall is.



http://allears.net/news/hnews.htm#062708

That's some sad news....  At least Ragalan Road won't be closing.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Oh... NO!!!! They can't close the Adventure's Club...NO NO NO!!!


----------



## maddhatir

WDWguru said:


> Be sure to check out the chart I did with all the stats, and you can click on the link in the box to see some photos.
> 
> Enjoy! http://www.sltrib.com/travel/ci_9701000



Thanks guru! I will check it out! and congrats on getting your article published!



JCandKT said:


> I've been nominated to the National Honor Society of Collegiate Scholars - what an accomplishment... Of course, when I tell my dad this he says "wow, maybe if you hadn't screwed up in college the first time you'd be in a better position in life now."



Congrats on your new job!!! And hey, I know you do not know me IRL- But *I* am impressed by your accomplishment if that helps!!!  You should be proud!!!

and

I am disgusted about the AC!!!!! 

DH and I LOVED it! People probably complained "but my KIDS can't enjoy it" and now it will POOF!

DH did say that maybe they are getting rid of the clubs b/c PI seemed to bring in a lot of the locals in the evening. I sometimes felt a little creepy in the area when I would go over later at night. Especially in the parking lot around 1am! "_your not in Kansas anymore_" 

DH actually said the area felt "seedy" and for _him_ to say that- is unusual!

I also read about it here http://www.magicalmountain.net/WDWNewsDetail.asp?NewsID=1942

Well- I guess another good reason to have to go back to Disney in about a year- just to see the changes! But I still think the AC would be fine to keep- I doubt the locals frequented the club very often- that was a place the visitors we love to go to!

I guess now that it will be more _family friendly_-  there will be no place to escape the little ones!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Yay! Vacation! DH wanted to take off July 2nd and 3rd. He wanted to put his boat in the water on the 2nd- I said HELLOOOOOOO!? No can do! We have the Type O concert that day! I will not take any chances of him not making it back in time to get to the concert- uh-uh- no way!



Yah Hoo!  3 more days til Type O for you girl!   We totally enjoyed RUSH Friday night.  They put on a great show, and we ended up in row 3!  SWEET!  It was great to see the guys up close and personal!  And the weatherman was right, we arrived at the fest just as it was starting to rain.  We found cover in one of the local micro-brew stands and got the party started.  It down poured for about 30 minutes and then we headed over to  a stage where a RUSH tribute band was playing, met up with some friends and had another beer before grabbing a bite to eat and heading into the amphitheatre.



> I have not gotten around to see Chip- I still have so many GHs on my DVR I have to catch up with! I watched the one last night about the haunted house in CT- that was pretty interesting.



You have definitely got to check out this show, I DVR'd last Monday's and watched it last night, again it was a great episode.  It's a different perspective with the kids, and Chip is doing a great job with them to help accept/no fear their gifts.  And no PRAYING!!



> I would like to live in a haunted house. Or- right next to a cemetery! I would love to convert an old church into a house!



You and I are definitely thinking on the same lines here!  I would love to live near a cemetary, just think how cool it would be to set up a camera facing the cemetary during the night (especially "dead time") and see what we can cathc on tape?!  I keep telling DH we need to do a cemetary walk-through sometime.  I had seen an episode of "A Haunting" (have you seen this show, they do re-enactments?) they were airing a story about Dartford Cemetary in Green Lake, WI which is a 2 hour drive from where I live.  They claim that if you sit on the mausoleum that the ghosts will push you off, and there are also claims of seeing the spirt of an Indian Chief and two children.  Can you say, "road trip!"



> I will set my DVR for DH International- there will be no more room for anything else to tape!
> 
> I am not familiar with Barry? I Googled him, but he does not look familiar. Wow- I wonder if all of those people that will be on that show had a falling out with Jason and Grant? I was wondering where Donna went! Jason seems like he can be a .......jerk... Not too sure about Grant.



You will see Barry introduced in the later episodes of GH that you have DVR'd.  The GH guys get invited to the UK to do some ghost hunting there and that's where they meet Barry.  And those are some great episodes too, definitely try to catch up on them soon.

A yeah, Jason is a total jerk in my opinion he's just a tad bit full of himself. Grant seems okay, I would think he would be much more friendlier than Jason in person.  Steve seems a little stuck on himself, especially after Brian left the show and he became Tech Manager, give me a break!  I was glad to see Brian back in GHI, he seems to be on the ball in this show. 



> I like Steve and Dave Tango. Dave Tango is from the area, that is why they investigated the Burlington County Prison.
> 
> I have been wanting to go to there for years, even before TAPS existed!  It is about 20 minutes from my house. So close, but I have not made it there yet!
> 
> I also spent the night @ Fort Mifflin when I used to be part of a hunting group. I did not experience anything though.  But it was cool to spend the night.
> 
> I have also been to the Eastern State Penitentiary- DH and I did an audio tour- It was nice b/c it was during the week and no one was there! We were alone most of the time (or WERE we! )



Wow, you have visited some really great places to investigate!  It really makes me want to get moving and begin some true ghost hunting.  Thanks for the inspiration!


----------



## TKDisneylover

WDWguru said:


> As many of you know, about a year ago I finished my circuit of every Disney park in the world. I actually hit them all within 10 months! I work for a newspaper, so I churned out a story for our travel section this weekend. We put the story up early online so I figured I'd share with you all!
> Be sure to check out the chart I did with all the stats, and you can click on the link in the box to see some photos.
> 
> Enjoy! http://www.sltrib.com/travel/ci_9701000



Very cool article, congrats on the publication and all the traveling you got to do for all the reseach.  It was very enjoyable to read!  



zima-cheryl said:


> I guess I feel there s/be a little more pesonal responsibility around.  Read the paperwork, learn the differnece between ARM & fixed, balloon payments, prepayent penalties, etc.  I realize I'm borderline obsessive-compulsive, but I read every page of our mortgage agreement w/in the 3 day window we had to bail w/out penalty.  Asked questions & knew exactly what we were getting into.
> 
> Sorry... this is just one of my pet peeves....  We save, scratch & get into a house we can afford *and *still afford to save for retirement & now the government is talking about bailing all these homeowners out.  They aren't entitled to those big McMansions.  I say if you screwed up...too bad!  Caveat Emptor.
> 
> I will say if someone got screwed over by a dishonest mortgage company they s/be able to sue the pants off them.  But I don't think that is the case most of the time.
> 
> OK -- Rant over.



I completely agree with everything you just said!  We all need to be responsible here and reading the fine print is part of it.  Know what your getting into and what the future consequences could be!  It's only common sense, unfortunately these days it appears people do not know what that is! 



JCandKT said:


> hey guys... just me!
> haven't posted on this board in awhile.  wanted to share some news.
> 
> I've started a new job after being laid-off from my last job of 9 years.  I'm now working at a radio station in downtown Indy - my DREAM job since I was a kid!  I actually voiced my first commercial the other day!  It was awesome.
> 
> I've been nominated to the National Honor Society of Collegiate Scholars - what an accomplishment... Of course, when I tell my dad this he says "wow, maybe if you hadn't screwed up in college the first time you'd be in a better position in life now."
> 
> No congrats, no good job...just let's bring up the past.  Jerk.
> 
> Planning our next trip to WDW in September to celebrate 7 years... hard to believe...
> 
> Saw Wall-E last night - loved it, and the short beforehand was great!
> 
> That's all - just wanted to pop in on my original thread!
> 
> love you guys!



Hey, congrats on the nomination!!   Sorry to hear your dad was such a jerk about the great news, but hang in there and know that you have done a great job!  And congrats on the new dream job, it's the topping on the cake!


----------



## finleypk

This has been an interesting thread to read. I respect each and everyone's right to have or not have children in life. That said, this is a great site with some well known scholars, poets, writers, celebrities and their quotes on why they didn't have children. You have to scroll down to find quotes along with the names on the lists. I enjoyed reading it.

It's at wwwchildfreebychoice.com (choose the History section and there's the list!)

I'm new here and you have to have 10 posts before you can link. Crazy, that.
Anyhoo, I hope you can find the site. Some great quotes on there from famous people.

Some samples from that site:
*Jaya Battacharya
Actress*

"I lead a hectic life, with too much to do and too little time. I feel I simply would not be able to give my child the kind of time that I would like to. And I don’t want to be pressured into having a kid just because it’s the done thing.” 

*Helen Clark
New Zealand Prime Minister*

"I actually have great faith in the common sense of Kiwis and I think these days most people are going to say 'For God's sake, people are entitled to choice about their life, Helen's made her choice, that's fine with us'. "So what are they getting at? Am I supposed to not be a real woman because I haven't had children? It's all bizarre and I don't think most people relate to it." 

*George Clooney
Actor, Star of Ocean's Eleven*

"Where is it written that you have to have kids? You can easily borrow other people's and give them back later." 

* John Corbett
Actor*

“I’m 41-years-old, I’m single, I own my own house, I don’t have any kids. I can make decisions other people might not have the freedom to make.” 

*Bonnie Erbe
PBS Commentator and Columnist*

"My husband and I affirmatively chose not to have children, so we could devote ourselves to our beloved work, extensive worldwide travel, our favorite pastimes, friends and family. We have a lifestyle most of our married-with-children friends can only dream about. And it's one we could only have dreamed about, too, if we had had children." 

*Ian McKellen
Actor, Star of The Lord of the Rings Trilogy*

"...having no one dependent on me has meant I've been able to pursue my career in the way I've wanted...I used to be rather relieved that kids weren't a possibility. Being a parent means keeping a tight rein on your selfishness. Though I don't suppose many parents do. Why isn't parenting taught? Why is it assumed that just because you can procreate you can be a good parent? Anyway, I'm too frail to be changing nappies." 

*Shirley Manson
Singer*

“What I find incredibly funny is people who say, ‘Oh you must have children otherwise you’re being incredibly selfish.’ As if having children stops selfishness. I know hundreds of parents and they’re the most selfish people I have ever met. As wonderful as I think child-rearing is for some, it’s not for everybody." 

More at the site I listed above.


----------



## TKDisneylover

finleypk said:


> This has been an interesting thread to read. I respect each and everyone's right to have or not have children in life. That said, this is a great site with some well known scholars, poets, writers, celebrities and their quotes on why they didn't have children. You have to scroll down to find quotes along with the names on the lists. I enjoyed reading it.
> 
> 
> *Shirley Manson
> Singer*
> 
> What I find incredibly funny is people who say, Oh you must have children otherwise youre being incredibly selfish. As if having children stops selfishness. I know hundreds of parents and theyre the most selfish people I have ever met. As wonderful as I think child-rearing is for some, its not for everybody."
> 
> More at the site I listed above.



First of all  

Thanks for sharing the info, it's definitely a good read!  And I completely agree with Shirley Manson's comment (plus I'm a fan  ).


----------



## PhotobearSam

finleypk said:


> *Ian McKellen
> Actor, Star of The Lord of the Rings Trilogy*
> 
> "...having no one dependent on me has meant I've been able to pursue my career in the way I've wanted...I used to be rather relieved that kids weren't a possibility. Being a parent means keeping a tight rein on your selfishness. Though I don't suppose many parents do. Why isn't parenting taught? Why is it assumed that just because you can procreate you can be a good parent? Anyway, I'm too frail to be changing nappies."
> .




I love that...Thanks for joining us...Please stick around.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Wow, you have visited some really great places to investigate!  It really makes me want to get moving and begin some true ghost hunting.  Thanks for the inspiration!



I am watching my last GH on DVR and they are going to Pea Patch Island!!! That is another place I have been wanting to go!!!! These places are SO close- what is wrong with me!??



finleypk said:


> This has been an interesting thread to read. .



Welcome!!!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Okay child free peeps, beware I have a major rant......WITH HIGH SCHOOLERS!!!! 

Last night DH and I went to see Matisyahu (hisidic jewish reggae rapper/beat boxer), he is apparently very popular with the teens which I was not aware of (I should have done my homework!).  He was performing at a local music festival (that I have previously mentioned on this thread called Summerfest) where the seating is open to festival attendees in the form of metal bleachers.  There are approximately 50 that go straight back from the stage and on the side are riser bleachers (for people like DH and I who are trying to avoid the masses who want to be right in front of the stage) on each side, these are short and seat about 10 people across and have about six rows.

We arrived at 8:30 to get these seats and Matisyahu went on stage at 10:00, when the band started playing utter chaos broke out.  Of course you have the usual happenings where everyone stands on the bleachers, similar to any venue concert where people want to stand the entire time.  I admit I expected that and figured I would be standing, no problem.  But it was when these kids decided to climb the risers from behind and trying to push their way into our spots literally pushing us out of the way that I got pissed!   One girl actually grabbed DH's shoulder to try to pull herself up onto a seat so she could squeeze in and stand in front of me!!  Of course he told her to get her hands off of him and with the help of me, she went flying backwards onto her boyfriend who was also trying to get up.   Now I would not usually push someone, but these kids were unbelievable!  Behind me there were three boys who were hanging on for dear life behind me to hold themselves up on the back of the riser.  One dude elbowed me in the head and I pushed him back so hard he almost fell off.  Mind you this was probably about 10 feet in the air, ***!! 

I will be completely honest here, I never as a teenager started climbing risers or pushed my way through people to see a group.  We would wind ourselves through the crowd to find an open spot and always said excuse me as we walked through, but we never literally pushed people out of the way as if we deserved to be there instead of them.  We ended up leaving our seats early because it just got worse as the kids at the other end of the riser started letting more kids onto the bleachers and we were literally getting pushed off the other side.  We stood farther in the back, and even then some of the kids were goofing around amd pushing each other into innocent bystanders.  Let's just say that the people who got their beer spilled were no too happy. 

Is it me or have these kids completely lost control?!  I do remember we had a problem with kids at WDW when we were there in December who would run through in large groups and just bang into us as they went by.  Or there would be one of their friends in line and a group of 10 would try to join in the line (thank you CM's who keep an eye out for this!! ).  Is it that parents are not teaching kids to respect others or do they just plain and simple not have manners at all!!??   I think the fact that my parents taught us to respect other people was enough that we knew not to be rude or pushy.  And didn't they also teach us that in school, "no pushing in line, no running down the hall, etc."?

Unfortunately DH does not want to go back there again, at all.  I tried to tell him that we are probably better off going during the day when the kids are all sleeping and enjoy the groups that play then.  Of course those are not the "headliners" but it is still nice to walk around on a beautiful day and have a beer, enjoy some good food and good music.  But he has renamed it "Bummerfest".

Rant over.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

TKDisneylover said:


> Okay child free peeps, beware I have a major rant......WITH HIGH SCHOOLERS!!!!
> 
> Last night DH and I went to see Matisyahu (hisidic jewish reggae rapper/beat boxer), he is apparently very popular with the teens which I was not aware of (I should have done my homework!).  He was performing at a local music festival (that I have previously mentioned on this thread called Summerfest) where the seating is open to festival attendees in the form of metal bleachers.  There are approximately 50 that go straight back from the stage and on the side are riser bleachers (for people like DH and I who are trying to avoid the masses who want to be right in front of the stage) on each side, these are short and seat about 10 people across and have about six rows.
> 
> We arrived at 8:30 to get these seats and Matisyahu went on stage at 10:00, when the band started playing utter chaos broke out.  Of course you have the usual happenings where everyone stands on the bleachers, similar to any venue concert where people want to stand the entire time.  I admit I expected that and figured I would be standing, no problem.  But it was when these kids decided to climb the risers from behind and trying to push their way into our spots literally pushing us out of the way that I got pissed!   One girl actually grabbed DH's shoulder to try to pull herself up onto a seat so she could squeeze in and stand in front of me!!  Of course he told her to get her hands off of him and with the help of me, she went flying backwards onto her boyfriend who was also trying to get up.   Now I would not usually push someone, but these kids were unbelievable!  Behind me there were three boys who were hanging on for dear life behind me to hold themselves up on the back of the riser.  One dude elbowed me in the head and I pushed him back so hard he almost fell off.  Mind you this was probably about 10 feet in the air, ***!!
> 
> I will be completely honest here, I never as a teenager started climbing risers or pushed my way through people to see a group.  We would wind ourselves through the crowd to find an open spot and always said excuse me as we walked through, but we never literally pushed people out of the way as if we deserved to be there instead of them.  We ended up leaving our seats early because it just got worse as the kids at the other end of the riser started letting more kids onto the bleachers and we were literally getting pushed off the other side.  We stood farther in the back, and even then some of the kids were goofing around amd pushing each other into innocent bystanders.  Let's just say that the people who got their beer spilled were no too happy.
> 
> Is it me or have these kids completely lost control?!  I do remember we had a problem with kids at WDW when we were there in December who would run through in large groups and just bang into us as they went by.  Or there would be one of their friends in line and a group of 10 would try to join in the line (thank you CM's who keep an eye out for this!! ).  Is it that parents are not teaching kids to respect others or do they just plain and simple not have manners at all!!??   I think the fact that my parents taught us to respect other people was enough that we knew not to be rude or pushy.  And didn't they also teach us that in school, "no pushing in line, no running down the hall, etc."?
> 
> Unfortunately DH does not want to go back there again, at all.  I tried to tell him that we are probably better off going during the day when the kids are all sleeping and enjoy the groups that play then.  Of course those are not the "headliners" but it is still nice to walk around on a beautiful day and have a beer, enjoy some good food and good music.  But he has renamed it "Bummerfest".
> 
> Rant over.





it is not just you. DH and I see this everywhere these days. I have to say I was a very regular concert goer in middle school/ high school(still am) But I never acted in such a way. My thoughts were, well these people arrived here before me, lesson learned to get here earlier next time. I never even considered being so inconsiderate to people and pushing them around and such. But we see this everywhere we go lately. There are no manners coming from children at things like this. None at all. Makes me so angry that I knew that it wasn't that long ago that I was at that age and I knew better.


----------



## JCandKT

Thanks for all the encouragement all --- I knew I could count on you!

And as far as the teenager rant.......AMEN!
What is with kids these days?

When JC and I were at WDW in Jan07, there were these teens that were horshing around with a wheelchair, running in and out of traffic on NEW YEARS EVE (read: wicked busy) and slammed right into the back of JC's legs, cutting them up...did they say sorry?  No, they just laughed!

It's to the point where i don't even want to go to concerts because of some teens.

Ian McClellan has it right..where does it say you'll be a good parent just because you can procreate?  Why do you have to take tests to get your license but any schmo can have a kid?  

I know someone who's in her 30's who has a 15 year old.  She's still in party-mode because she's young... and she's setting this example for her kid...  Case in point, one night she went to a show, got completely smashed, and had to have her son help her to bed...
...and she wonders why he's a punk!

ugh. rant over.


----------



## zima-cheryl

TKDisneylover said:


> I will be completely honest here, I never as a teenager started climbing risers or pushed my way through people to see a group.  We would wind ourselves through the crowd to find an open spot and always said excuse me as we walked through, but we never literally pushed people out of the way as if we deserved to be there instead of them.



I don't know about you - but when I was a kid I was afraid to behave that way.  Maybe it was the fact we lived in a smaller town - but it seemed like no matter what we did, somehow word always got back to my folks.  And when it did - OH BOY!     I think I spent half of my high school years grounded!




TKDisneylover said:


> Is it me or have these kids completely lost control?!  I do remember we had a problem with kids at WDW when we were there in December who would run through in large groups and just bang into us as they went by.  Or there would be one of their friends in line and a group of 10 would try to join in the line (thank you CM's who keep an eye out for this!! ).  Is it that parents are not teaching kids to respect others or do they just plain and simple not have manners at all!!??   I think the fact that my parents taught us to respect other people was enough that we knew not to be rude or pushy.  And didn't they also teach us that in school, "no pushing in line, no running down the hall, etc."?



No - it isn't you.  It's everywhere...not just WDW & other big parks.

Believe it or not our local shopping mall has had to put in a policy - no groups of kids.  They had the big herds of teens running around, blocking walkways, getting into mischief and scaring away shoppers.  Once it started to hit the bottom line $$ for stores they had to do something.  Now groups of more than 2 or 3 teens w/out an adult have to leave.  They've had to hire cops to enforce it - but at least shopping is pleasant again (well as pleasant as mall shopping can be  )

Of course again - if I had tried that back in the day I would have only tried it once!  My folks would have made sure of that.

And don't think I'm saying I had it tough or was abused or anything.
Not that I'll ever admit it to my parents ... but I'm glad they were strict & taught me right from wrong & how to behave in public.  

What is going to happen to these kids when they get into a real job?  They aren't going to know how to behave & interact w/customers or their co-workers?  And in a way you have to feel bad for the kids, because it is the parents who are doing them a huge, long term disservice by not teaching them better.


----------



## maddhatir

UGH! Tammy I am so sorry your night was ruined b/c of that! You were looking forward to that for a while!

I am SO surprised that I never had a _real_ problem with teens at any concerts I go to. None that are that bad that I would not want to go- (except! those all day things like you are talking about- too much liquor- too many kids= annoying drunk kids! ) IF I really loved a band and wanted to see them at an all-day- I would still risk it and go. 

Maybe we do not see many kids b/c most of the agressive ones are in the pit 

We have gotten one or two idiots who will try and squeeze down the row and get in your way, that has always happened to us since my KISS concert days (WITH make-up I might add ) Remember the open floor at the big venues and the tix were "general admission- you would have to line up 2 hours before the concert so when they opened the doors right at 7- you can push and shove and plow your way to the front of the floor next to the stage!?. ooo- Sorry....went off a little....I am back 

At our last concert, DH got up to go to the bathroom, this crazy kid all thrashin' around jumped in his spot- I knew DH would_ handle _it when he got back and he did, He just pushed the dude right out of the way DH has NO tolorance for that stuff- 

Another concert we went to, this guy wiggled his way near us and proceeded to do the_ fist thing _and wave it up and down in the air- he almost nailed me in the head! When the guy's hand came back the next time- DH GRABBED his wrist and squeeeeezed it real hard and told him to _knock it off_ 

My man don't mess around!  

Gotta go to bed! Have a nice night everyone.


----------



## PhotobearSam

zima-cheryl said:


> And don't think I'm saying I had it tough or was abused or anything.
> Not that I'll ever admit it to my parents ... but I'm glad they were strict & taught me right from wrong & how to behave in public.





I am proud to say this too...I asked my Mom once if I ever acted like that and she said "You would not have dared" and she is right. They taught me well and I was not abused in the least. I still don't cuss in front of my Mom and I am 36. 


Mom, Dad, Thanks for teaching me how to act, how to deal with customers and how to think for myself. I just wish you could teach other people's kids the same things.


----------



## PhotobearSam

This is the most beautiful video EVER!!! I now truly believe that our pets really do feel LOVE for us...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=adYbFQFXG0U


----------



## stitchlet

That was incredible!  Thank you so much for posting it!  

As parents to 3 kitties ourselves, we completely agree with you that they do love us.

Gotta go hug the beasties now . . .  LOL!  >^..^<


----------



## Bill Brown

PhotobearSam said:


> This is the most beautiful video EVER!!! I now truly believe that our pets really do feel LOVE for us...
> 
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=adYbFQFXG0U


Had a similar experience, but on a much smaller scale.  I moved out to begin life on my own in '72.  A few years later, my parents and sister moved back to the U.S. from Germany.  Our family cat moved in with neighbors.  In '82 I was in the area and stopped by to see the old haunts.  Everyone I knew had long since moved on, including those original neighbors.  However, our former family cat was out front and raced over to greet me, having not seen me in 10 years. I was warmly surprised.


----------



## maddhatir

Bill Brown said:


> Had a similar experience, but on a much smaller scale.  I moved out to begin life on my own in '72.  A few years later, my parents and sister moved back to the U.S. from Germany.  Our family cat moved in with neighbors.  In '82 I was in the area and stopped by to see the old haunts.  Everyone I knew had long since moved on, including those original neighbors.  However, our former family cat was out front and raced over to greet me, having not seen me in 10 years. I was warmly surprised.


----------



## Flyerfan

maddhatir said:


> Remember the open floor at the big venues and the tix were "general admission- you would have to line up 2 hours before the concert so when they opened the doors right at 7- you can push and shove and plow your way to the front of the floor next to the stage!?. ooo- Sorry....went off a little....I am back



I've just been flooded with memories of being in the middle of the crowd up near the stage and being shifted from side to side.  Oh, yeah and needing to go to the bathroom and wnding my way out....but I never pushed and shoved anyone.  Ahhh, what memories.  Thanks, Madd.  I feel young again.


----------



## maddhatir

Flyerfan said:


> I've just been flooded with memories of being in the middle of the crowd up near the stage and being shifted from side to side.  Oh, yeah and needing to go to the bathroom and wnding my way out....but I never pushed and shoved anyone.  Ahhh, what memories.  Thanks, Madd.  I feel young again.



Hey! Is this your first time here???


----------



## maddhatir

Hi! 

Hope you all do not mind me copy and pasting my post from another thread about my last few days 

Wed I had my concert! Type O- I told DH during the concert - "this is not just a concert- IT IS AN EXPERIENCE!"  

I got some great pics- these are ony 2 of them....

MY Peter! His voice makes me....melt! And plays bass like nobody's business






Their guitarist Kenny can take you to the moon with his playing abilities! And he can belt out a tune too!







DH and his brother took DH's boat down the shore and put it in the water- finally! So we were down there @ his sister's place since Thursday. We came home today b/c the weather was not that great and it was not going to be much better tomorrow. 

DH did take the boat out for the very first time on Friday with my 2 BILs.


----------



## PhotobearSam

I posted a rant about Teenagers on the CB...come join in...

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1876586


----------



## KirklandTutu

PhotobearSam said:


> I posted a rant about Teenagers on the CB...come join in...
> 
> http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1876586



I don't have a problem with teenagers, just the parents who created them...or enabled them to get to the place that they're at.

I saw your thread over there, made me think about a couple of my students who I had to give an off-the-cuff leson to re. job hunts.  They were going to go out together for applications.  The first thing any hiring manager learns is that you don't hire someone that comes in with friends or family.  

I, however, am not made of thick enough skin to post over on the community board.


----------



## Flyerfan

maddhatir said:


> Hey! Is this your first time here???




Actually, I've been here before but it was awhile ago.


----------



## Flyerfan

Hey Madd...I can see you're a metal fan.  Is Type O local or am I just out of the loop?  I can take some metal but not all.  Cannnot stand the death stuff but can take some Metallica, Ozzy, depends.  DH loves it.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Thanks everyone for your comments regarding those "kids". 
(Shyvioletisme, JCandKT, zima-cheryl, maddhatir & photobearSam)  I think we were all raised with manners, it's unfortunate that parents do not feel a need to teach their children to respect others.



PhotobearSam said:


> This is the most beautiful video EVER!!! I now truly believe that our pets really do feel LOVE for us...
> 
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=adYbFQFXG0U



This was very cool, thanks so much for posting it!!



stitchlet said:


> That was incredible!  Thank you so much for posting it!   As parents to 3 kitties ourselves, we completely agree with you that they do love us.  Gotta go hug the beasties now . . .  LOL!  >^..^<





Bill Brown said:


> Had a similar experience, but on a much smaller scale.  I moved out to begin life on my own in '72.  A few years later, my parents and sister moved back to the U.S. from Germany.  Our family cat moved in with neighbors.  In '82 I was in the area and stopped by to see the old haunts.  Everyone I knew had long since moved on, including those original neighbors.  However, our former family cat was out front and raced over to greet me, having not seen me in 10 years. I was warmly surprised.



 



Flyerfan said:


> I've just been flooded with memories of being in the middle of the crowd up near the stage and being shifted from side to side.  Oh, yeah and needing to go to the bathroom and wnding my way out....but I never pushed and shoved anyone.  Ahhh, what memories.  Thanks, Madd.  I feel young again.



  back!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Hi!
> 
> Hope you all do not mind me copy and pasting my post from another thread about my last few days
> 
> Wed I had my concert! Type O- I told DH during the concert - "this is not just a concert- IT IS AN EXPERIENCE!"
> 
> I got some great pics- these are ony 2 of them....
> 
> MY Peter! His voice makes me....melt! And plays bass like nobody's business
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Their guitarist Kenny can take you to the moon with his playing abilities! And he can belt out a tune too!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> DH and his brother took DH's boat down the shore and put it in the water- finally! So we were down there @ his sister's place since Thursday. We came home today b/c the weather was not that great and it was not going to be much better tomorrow.
> 
> DH did take the boat out for the very first time on Friday with my 2 BILs.



Hey Madd,

Glad to hear you had such a great time at the show!  The pics turned out pretty good and I have to admit after watching the video links for Type O that you had posted, there sure is something about Peter and those fangs of his!  It brings back memories from when I was in love with the old Dracula movies, I wanted to be bitten so I could become immortal forever!

Nice boat!


----------



## maddhatir

Flyerfan said:


> Hey Madd...I can see you're a metal fan.  Is Type O local or am I just out of the loop?  I can take some metal but not all.  Cannnot stand the death stuff but can take some Metallica, Ozzy, depends.  DH loves it.



Type O is from Long Island (NO WRONG- EDITED- they are from Brooklyn! sorry) - kind of local- but not Philly.
Check them out on Youtube! I think if you like Ozzy etc you might like Type O- they have been around for, as Peter says, 2 centuries! But I think it is more like 2 decades- they are not death metal as in "growling" but more death metal as in song titles like "I Love you Death". "Everything Dies" "Everyone I Love is Dead" But his voice and their music is.......... heart stopping and beautiful in a weird way! Once you hear Peter's voice- you will know if you love them or hate them!

I read somewhere before they compare them to the Beatles, The Beatles were the Fab Four and Type O are known as The Drab Four The do a rendition of "Day Tripper" on one of their CDs. and at the concert, they went into their version "Dear Prudence" that took my breath away!

I have a thread over on the Adult forum for Death Metal! I LOVE IT!!!! Lamb of God, Sepultura, etc. There were some people posting on it, but it is back a few pages now- I should bump it up!



TKDisneylover said:


> Hey Madd,
> 
> Glad to hear you had such a great time at the show!  The pics turned out pretty good and I have to admit after watching the video links for Type O that you had posted, there sure is something about Peter and those fangs of his!  It brings back memories from when I was in love with the old Dracula movies, I wanted to be bitten so I could become immortal forever!
> 
> Nice boat!



OOOOO- I have a vampire fetish too! And I cannot WAIT until JD plays Barnabas Collins!!!! eeeekkk *high pitch girly screams*

I can watch The Lost Boys and Interview with the Vampire over and over again! 

I have a few pics of Peter and you can see his fangs- the pics are little blurried though- but I will post them! BUT! I have to go to Walmart now .... Can you say......_*FA-REAK FEST*_!!!!


----------



## Bill Brown

Continuing this segue-way into tastes in music.  A few years back _Googled_ my own name to see what I could find about myself on the Net.  Came across, Composer Bill Brown Official Site.  Bill provides free full length download samples of his scores for movies, TV shows, games, ads, etc.  I've loved action film theme scores since as far back as I can remember and Bill composes lots of my kind of music, along with other genres.  Nice coincidence we share the same name.


----------



## maddhatir

Well lucky me- I did not have to go to Walmart- we decided to do Target instead- Thank GOODNESS! 

These are the 2 pics I have of Peter and you can KIND OF see his fangs- not very clear pics, but- 










I am so PO'd that I got great pics of the other guys- and not many at all of Pete 

OH and we had Type O on in the car and "Day Tripper" came on,  and it dawned on me  , I said to DH- you should name your boat "Day Tripper"!!! He said that is not bad! He just might. 

He took the original name off when he got it- it was called Miss Priss _NOT _exactly DH!


----------



## maddhatir

Hey Sam!

Great thread you started about the teens! Seems like you are gretting some great responses!

But, of course, the parents who are doing this for their kids- probably would not respond b/c they should be ashamed of themselves and everyone would probably flame them!


----------



## maddhatir

Oh! Tammy- I forgot to mention how the crowd behaved at the concert- I did not see one incident of misbehaving peeps- I was surprised (I always am) to see an older crowd intermingled in with the youngins. We sat next to this really nice girl- she was all alone! 

When you go to this venue- they have nazi security there. Outside-they will only let so many people line up in front of the venue- then there is about a 1/2 block that is open and they start the rest of the line- they do this b/c there is an entrance to a parking lot in between the 2 lines. Everyone stays put. 

Security is always pacing about along the lines. When they are ready to let you in- they MAKE everyone in the one big line- make up 3 lines and they only allow so many people to proceed to the entrance while the others stay back. and then they do the same for the next section of the crowd. Even when you get to the entrance- there is more security to tell you which security check to go to. 

They don't mess around at that place. I have never seen a place so organized in keeping the crowds at bay!


----------



## PoohNTuck

This morning at work I was holding a baby and I was so happy and I felt like I really wanted one...

Now I'm home drinking a glass of Cabernet (my second actually, try barefoot wines if you haven't already- they're good stuff!) in my clean quiet house and I'm happy to go back and get my baby fix again next weekend!!!

Fleeting moments of baby desire...

Have a great Monday everyone


----------



## maddhatir

PoohNTuck said:


> This morning at work I was holding a baby and I was so happy and I felt like I really wanted one...
> 
> Now I'm home drinking a glass of Cabernet (my second actually, try barefoot wines if you haven't already- they're good stuff!) in my clean quiet house and I'm happy to go back and get my baby fix again next weekend!!!
> 
> Fleeting moments of baby desire...
> 
> Have a great Monday everyone



 You scared for a little bit there 

My SIL drinks Barefoot all the time- she loves it- I am sure I tried it at her place- but cannot remember- I think I might have to take a trip to the liquor store one day this week. I am a huge Cartlidge and Browne Cab fan when I drink red. 

I remember a year or so ago- I could not get enough of red wine- and now I do not have that craving much 

We did go to Carrabba's yesterday for lunch and DH and I drank a pitcher of Sangria! It was pretty good- needed a little more sugar- but not bad! I got a nice little buzz going


----------



## Barthy73

http://funny.picturepie.com/images/birth_control.jpg

Happy Monday, my childfree friends!


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> http://funny.picturepie.com/images/birth_control.jpg
> 
> Happy Monday, my childfree friends!



 I think I may have seen those kids on the Ocean City boardwalk on Friday 

For those of you who are in the area- man- Ocean City boardwalk has gone downhill! Sure- There were always annoying teens there, but it just has a creepy feel to it now.  We stopped going to Wildwood years ago for that reason-  I have not been there in YEARS- maybe it is time to go back, I hear it is a lot better now.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> OOOOO- I have a vampire fetish too! And I cannot WAIT until JD plays Barnabas Collins!!!! eeeekkk *high pitch girly screams*



Ohhh, fill me in, when is this supposed to occur?



> I can watch The Lost Boys and Interview with the Vampire over and over again!



The Lost Boys is one of my favorite movies, I even have the video.  And Jason Patric is sooo hot with his fangs and badboy vampire look.  I would have loved to have been Jami Gertz in that movie!!  And I'm not a big Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise fan, but adding fangs and long hair to them (and, ahem, the possibly "18th Century clothing" and they can bite me anytime!  And how about Bram Stoker's Dracula?  It reminded me of the old vampire movies.  I loved Gary Oldman as the "young dracula prince".  Did you know that he gave "Mina" absinthe to help her remember her past life as his wife?  I remember us having a past discussion about absinthe



maddhatir said:


> These are the 2 pics I have of Peter and you can KIND OF see his fangs- not very clear pics, but-



NICE Fangs!  You can see them pretty good in the pics, too bad they didn't come out clearer.  I guess you will just have to see them again so that you can get better pics!  Thanks for sharing them!



maddhatir said:


> Oh! Tammy- I forgot to mention how the crowd behaved at the concert- I did not see one incident of misbehaving peeps- I was surprised (I always am) to see an older crowd intermingled in with the youngins. We sat next to this really nice girl- she was all alone!



That's cool that they have such a good system going to keep everyone in line.  I know that some of our smaller venues have a good security system in place to keep everyone from getting out of hand.  I definitely think Summerfest needs to work on their security issues.  When I came back to work today I cannot believe how many people experienced the same thing I did at some of the shows too.  They all agreed it was in increase in rude kids and a bigger need for security.


----------



## TKDisneylover

PoohNTuck said:


> This morning at work I was holding a baby and I was so happy and I felt like I really wanted one...



 



> Now I'm home drinking a glass of Cabernet (my second actually, try barefoot wines if you haven't already- they're good stuff!) in my clean quiet house and I'm happy to go back and get my baby fix again next weekend!!!



Good recovery!

I had a dream recently that I got pregnant.  I am 44 years old and my husband has had 2 vasectomy's (the first did not take!), but I had to decide whether to keep it or not.  That was a *very* scary thought with many mixed emotions!   Thank goodness it was a dream!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Ohhh, fill me in, when is this supposed to occur?



OH DEAR GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was just looking for update regarding the film- I have been saying since I heard about Depp and Dark Shadows- PLEASE PLEASE PA-LEASE Do NOT let Tim Burton do this movie for JD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And look what I just found...........
http://www.cinematical.com/2008/06/02/tim-burton-to-direct-dark-shadows/

I am sorry- I now despise Tim Burton- enough with the weird, goofy characters Tim! All us JD fans would like to see him as a REAL vampire- not your twisted version of one!!!!!!!!!! He did not do TOO bad making Sweeney Todd look- mmmmm- OK, only b/c you knew who was under the makup- But imagine Edward Scissorhands with fangs! 

OMG- rant over- thank goodness I got that off my chest! But even though I got it off my chest- until I hear Tim is gone from the pic- I will be very disapointed about the movie! 





> The Lost Boys is one of my favorite movies, I even have the video.  And Jason Patric is sooo hot with his fangs and badboy vampire look.  I would have loved to have been Jami Gertz in that movie!!  And I'm not a big Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise fan, but adding fangs and long hair to them (and, ahem, the possibly "18th Century clothing" and they can bite me anytime!  And how about Bram Stoker's Dracula?  It reminded me of the old vampire movies.  I loved Gary Oldman as the "young dracula prince".  Did you know that he gave "Mina" absinthe to help her remember her past life as his wife?  I remember us having a past discussion about absinthe



DH and I rented a really $ucky movie last night (called Funny Games- it was supposed to be scary but it was just plain DUMB!) anywho- they had some previews- and guess what movie is coming out--- LOST BOYS 2!!!!!!!! That loser Cory Feldman is in it.  I forget the release date- I would not be surprised if it went right to DVD!

Yup- I still have some absinthe left! At that price you drink it very sparingly! 

And did you know JD drank absinthe in his movie "From He!!" he did the whole melting the sugar thing! OH MY! And what a surprise- I have this pic from my JD From He!! Photobucket album! 






I know I have seen the one with Gary Oldman but only once I think- not sure why- I love Gary Oldman- he is the reason I saw it. 

And I luuuuvvvvv the clothing in Interview with the Vampire. ugh!  Hey, maybe it has something to do with our past lives! Ya think!? 

Speaking of vampires- Guess what I got before the Type O concert- one of those jesus fishies you put on your car- however *MY* fishie has fangs and it says "Vampyre"! I love it! (not sure why they spell it with a "y" though) ah- who cares!


----------



## metalis4ever

HEll YES!!!  Type-O Negative are easily the greatest American Goth/Doom Metal band ever!!!! Bloody Kisses and October Rust are f'n amazing..Eventhough Peter Steele has lost his damn mind as of late he is still the man musical and lyrical genius even if he does think that he is a messenger sent from God  LOL!!!! That is just as hilarious as Tom Araya from Slayer and Dave Mustaine from Megadeth being Born again Christains  Actaully all insanity aside all aformentioned music is awesome I have seen Type-O live twice and both times were absolutely blown away 

Glad to see a Sister of True Metal on here that is a fan of Disney as well...Personally I have been bringing Metal to Disney since 1998 and much like metal Disney will never die \m/ -_- \m/


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> OH DEAR GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was just looking for update regarding the film- I have been saying since I heard about Depp and Dark Shadows- PLEASE PLEASE PA-LEASE Do NOT let Tim Burton do this movie for JD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



This is very cool, I had not heard anything about this, but I do remember Dark Shadows because my mom loved Barnabas Collins.  I agree with you about Tim Burton, he did good with Sweeney Todd but what is he going to do with the Barnabas character?  Hopefully since this is really JD's baby he will have control over his character.  I have to bring up Bram Stoker's Dracula again, because I really liked the way Gary Oldman looked as the young Dracula (longer hair, blue, round wire rim glasses).  It would be the perfect look for JD as Barnabas, just MHO. 



> and guess what movie is coming out--- LOST BOYS 2!!!!!!!! That loser Cory Feldman is in it.  I forget the release date- I would not be surprised if it went right to DVD!



I had heard this when I saw the previews for A&E's reality show The Two Corey's.  They had a big fight last season and would not talk to each other, so Feldman's manager is trying to get Haim to talk to him again to have a peaceful set while filming The Lost Boys.  I'm definitely curious about this movie, but I think your on the right track, it will probably go right to DVD.  I wonder if Mr. Patric will make an appearance, I have not heard of him being in any movies in a long, long time.



> Yup- I still have some absinthe left! At that price you drink it very sparingly!
> 
> And did you know JD drank absinthe in his movie "From He!!" he did the whole melting the sugar thing! OH MY! And what a surprise- I have this pic from my JD From He!! Photobucket album!



I have got to get myself some of this stuff!!! 



> And I luuuuvvvvv the clothing in Interview with the Vampire. ugh!  Hey, maybe it has something to do with our past lives! Ya think!?



You know it girl! 



> Speaking of vampires- Guess what I got before the Type O concert- one of those jesus fishies you put on your car- however *MY* fishie has fangs and it says "Vampyre"! I love it! (not sure why they spell it with a "y" though) ah- who cares!



Now that I would love to see!  I wonder if they make them with pentagrams in them?  I'm guessing on this, but maybe the reason they spell it with a "y" is because of a "funeral pyre", like Jim Morrison sings about in the song Light My Fire.


----------



## maddhatir

metalis4ever said:


> HEll YES!!!  Type-O Negative are easily the greatest American Goth/Doom Metal band ever!!!! Bloody Kisses and October Rust are f'n amazing..Eventhough Peter Steele has lost his damn mind as of late he is still the man musical and lyrical genius even if he does think that he is a messenger sent from God  LOL!!!! That is just as hilarious as Tom Araya from Slayer and Dave Mustaine from Megadeth being Born again Christains  Actaully all insanity aside all aformentioned music is awesome I have seen Type-O live twice and both times were absolutely blown away
> 
> Glad to see a Sister of True Metal on here that is a fan of Disney as well...Personally I have been bringing Metal to Disney since 1998 and much like metal Disney will never die \m/ -_- \m/



Glad to see you made it here- SO! You didn't tell us if you and your DW want any kiddies! 

My brother was saying someting about Tom Araya- hmmmm- when did this happen? I think it is kind of odd to hear a born again christian sing Slayer lyrics It's just not the same! 

BTW- one day I e-mailed one of the DJs (heck- is that what they are called still??) on Sirius to yell at them for never playing "He!! Awaits" OMG- I just LOVE when they say....."He!!!!!!! AAAAAw_aiiiiits_"!!!! That is all I need- just that part of the song 

We have another "Queen of Metal Darkness" here- as Hixski (*RIP* *moment of silence* *kneels* *does a sign of the cross* *falls over trying to get up* ) once dubbed us. I am not sure where she is- She is a sicko Slipknot fan- sicko in a good way of course! 

Knowing her- I would not be surprised if she is touring with the guys on their _Mayhem_ bus as we speak, helping them break in their new masks! 

Switching gears- Hey Sam! Your thread went over well!  I was surprised you were not attacked and beaten for it


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I have got to get myself some of this stuff!!!



Just remember- I do not think the absinthe here in the US is as good as Europe! Maybe you can just drink MORE of it Pay less-- drink more 



> Now that I would love to see!  I wonder if they make them with pentagrams in them?  I'm guessing on this, but maybe the reason they spell it with a "y" is because of a "funeral pyre", like Jim Morrison sings about in the song Light My Fire.



Not sure if that is the reason for the Y- that is odd isn't it?? 

Wait until you see what I found for you!



awwww- Look at the little hat! It's so cute!





Here is the link to buy it- it might be a sticker though....
http://bumperstickers.cafepress.com/item/wicca-fish-sticker-rectangular/93685318

Here are a few more- some of them are funny- check out the one that says *N-Chips *inside the fish!  I'm peeing 
http://stores.ebay.ca/Nicks-Vinyl-Decals-and-Stickers_Religion_W0QQfsubZ11436077QQfrsrcZ1


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Here are a few more- some of them are funny- check out the one that says *N-Chips *inside the fish!  I'm peeing
> http://stores.ebay.ca/Nicks-Vinyl-Decals-and-Stickers_Religion_W0QQfsubZ11436077QQfrsrcZ1



I saw the fish n- chips one on a car here the other day and it gave me a good chuckle!!!  think I might need that for my own!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Just remember- I do not think the absinthe here in the US is as good as Europe! Maybe you can just drink MORE of it Pay less-- drink more



That's right, didn't you ordered yours from Germany?  I'll have to see what I can find, we have a great liquor store in the area that carries some unique items, for a price of course.  But hey, it's probably worth it right? 



> Wait until you see what I found for you!
> 
> awwww- Look at the little hat! It's so cute!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Here is the link to buy it- it might be a sticker though....
> http://bumperstickers.cafepress.com/item/wicca-fish-sticker-rectangular/93685318
> 
> Here are a few more- some of them are funny- check out the one that says *N-Chips *inside the fish!  I'm peeing
> http://stores.ebay.ca/Nicks-Vinyl-Decals-and-Stickers_Religion_W0QQfsubZ11436077QQfrsrcZ1



*That's so cute, thanks so much for finding that!*  I just may order it, or better yet I'll just print it out on sticker paper!

I will have to wait until I get home to check the second link out, I keep getting an entertainment block here at work.


----------



## metalis4ever

maddhatir said:


> Glad to see you made it here- SO! You didn't tell us if you and your DW want any kiddies!
> 
> My brother was saying someting about Tom Araya- hmmmm- when did this happen? I think it is kind of odd to hear a born again christian sing Slayer lyrics It's just not the same!
> 
> BTW- one day I e-mailed one of the DJs (heck- is that what they are called still??) on Sirius to yell at them for never playing "He!! Awaits" OMG- I just LOVE when they say....."He!!!!!!! AAAAAw_aiiiiits_"!!!! That is all I need- just that part of the song
> 
> We have another "Queen of Metal Darkness" here- as Hixski (*RIP* *moment of silence* *kneels* *does a sign of the cross* *falls over trying to get up* ) once dubbed us. I am not sure where she is- She is a sicko Slipknot fan- sicko in a good way of course!
> 
> Knowing her- I would not be surprised if she is touring with the guys on their _Mayhem_ bus as we speak, helping them break in their new masks!
> 
> Switching gears- Hey Sam! Your thread went over well!  I was surprised you were not attacked and beaten for it





My DW and I have not decided if we want to have little hellions of our own yet we want to go on many more vacations to Disney before having children.

Yeah Tom Araya said that the lyrics are just lyrics and that as much as they mean something to the fans they dont mean anything to him which is somewhat humerous...I saw Slayer at the HOB at DTD back in 1999 and Tom Araya was like "We are SLAYER!!!! and we are playing in the House of The *expletive* Mouse" 

Thats cool eventhough I don't like Slipknot that much actually not at all LOL 

Yeah so Disney and Metal a big huge YES kids/rugrats big big fat NO


----------



## maddhatir

metalis4ever said:


> My DW and I have not decided if we want to have little hellions of our own yet we want to go on many more vacations to Disney before having children.
> 
> Yeah Tom Araya said that the lyrics are just lyrics and that as much as they mean something to the fans they dont mean anything to him which is somewhat humerous...I saw Slayer at the HOB at DTD back in 1999 and Tom Araya was like "We are SLAYER!!!! and we are playing in the House of The *expletive* Mouse"
> 
> Thats cool eventhough I don't like Slipknot that much actually not at all LOL
> 
> Yeah so Disney and Metal a big huge YES kids/rugrats big big fat NO



OMG- have you read the thread Sam started about Teenagers and jobs over on the CB??

Priceless!


----------



## emmabean44

It sounds like you have put a lot of thought into your decision and you know what you want out of life. Don't let anyone else make that major decision for you!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> - some of them are funny- check out the one that says *N-Chips *inside the fish!  I'm peeing
> QQfsubZ11436077QQfrsrcZ1[/url]



Cafe Press is great!  

When I got my new car DH got me this one as a bumper sticker:






 

I could just spend hours browsing their stuff & getting a good laugh out of it!
Madd - I love the "n-chips" one....  I may be adding a new bumper sticker soon!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Cafe Press is great!
> 
> When I got my new car DH got me this one as a bumper sticker:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I could just spend hours browsing their stuff & getting a good laugh out of it!
> Madd - I love the "n-chips" one....  I may be adding a new bumper sticker soon!





OMGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!! I love it! 

I just saw someone with the "honor student" sticker on their car the other day- I was thinking to myself- does he REALLY want that on his car- or is it there out of GUILT??


----------



## maddhatir

emmabean44 said:


> It sounds like you have put a lot of thought into your decision and you know what you want out of life. Don't let anyone else make that major decision for you!



Welcome!

We are a happy
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 happy
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 happy
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 bunch!


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> We have another "Queen of Metal Darkness" here- as Hixski (*RIP* *moment of silence* *kneels* *does a sign of the cross* *falls over trying to get up* ) once dubbed us. I am not sure where she is- She is a sicko Slipknot fan- sicko in a good way of course!
> Knowing her- I would not be surprised if she is touring with the guys on their _Mayhem_ bus as we speak, helping them break in their new masks!



*Did I hear someone talking about me?? Far off in the distance I heard "Queen Of Metal Darkness" whispering in the wind so I figured I better get my butt over here and see what's going on!
How is everyone??? I'm doing great, still childfree Getting ready to hit the road in a few weeks on a business trip and have a blast. I got these for the trip:  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




..I thought they were a better fit for me than some strappy sandals. I'll try to get caught up with everything and everybody. And HEY! to the newcomers! 
Take care everyone and have a good hot day!*


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> *I thought they were a better fit for me than some strappy sandals. *


----------



## Shyvioletisme

Mayhem2008 said:


> *. I got these for the trip:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ..I thought they were a better fit for me than some strappy sandals. I'll try to get caught up with everything and everybody. And HEY! to the newcomers!
> Take care everyone and have a good hot day!*



those are some very cool boots!


----------



## Mayhem2008

Shyvioletisme said:


> those are some very cool boots!



Thank you! I fell in love with them and they are truly me. They'll be delivered Friday and I plan to wear them to bed Friday night  



maddhatir said:


>



Pfft...I mean seriously Madd, I think you know my personality well enough by now to know that Vera Wang will not be adorning any parts of my body. Besides, they match my fishnet shirt and my skull jewelry...Party on Wayne, Party on Garth


----------



## PhotobearSam

Love that dancing cat...LOL


----------



## maddhatir

I got this awesome e-mail from a friend of mine and I NEED to share it!

WHY am I up at this ungodly hour? Too much Arizona Green Tea with Ginsing and Honey before bedtime is why! You would think I would learn my lesson! 

Anywho- here it is and boy is this SO true! For years, I have been wondering where our dear friend has gone, I guess I am not the only one!  

*'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.........

Now, let's bow our heads.......

No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain; 
why the early bird gets the worm;
Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.

Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch;  and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches be came businesses ; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. 

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot.  She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents,
Truth and Trust; 
his wife, Discretion;
his daughter, Responsibility; 
and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; 
I Know My Rights, 
I Want It Now,
Someone Else Is To Blame, 
and I'm A Victim.*


----------



## Bill Brown

maddhatir said:


> *'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense,...*


Good riddance to simplistic thinking.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.........



This is soooo true! 

This actually sounds like something George Carlin would have put in his act, may he rest in peace.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> This is soooo true!
> 
> This actually sounds like something George Carlin would have put in his act, may he rest in peace.



RIP George! 

Now who do we have to speak out for the people WITH common sense??- I think Bill Maher can do it  

You know- I posted the same thing over on the CB and not ONE person responded! Just odd out of 50+ people looking at it, no one had a comment, I thought it hit the nail RIGHT on the head myself.


----------



## Bill Brown

maddhatir said:


> RIP George!


Interesting how words can be interpretted differently.
George Carlin ripped into what folks like to call _common sense_ behaviors with sharp sarcasm.  He will be missed.



> You know- I posted the same thing over on the CB and not ONE person responded! Just odd out of 50+ people looking at it, no one had a comment, I thought it hit the nail RIGHT on the head myself.


Not knocking the hobby, but do you have the CB setup with giant antenna to have conversations with folks around the globe?  I used a CB when I went through my 4x4 off-roading period in life.  CB is a handy tool for keeping in touch with a group of off-roaders.


----------



## maddhatir

Bill Brown said:


> Not knocking the hobby, but do you have the CB setup with giant antenna to have conversations with folks around the globe?  I used a CB when I went through my 4x4 off-roading period in life.  CB is a handy tool for keeping in touch with a group of off-roaders.



No CB chick here  - actually I am talking about the Community Board (CB)- here on the Dis


----------



## Bill Brown

maddhatir said:


> No CB chick here  - actually I am talking about the Community Board (CB)- here on the Dis


 Laughing at myself.


----------



## maddhatir

Bill Brown said:


> Laughing at myself.



 That's OK! People use so many abbreviations on the Dis it is hard to keep up! Heck I just found out recently that IRL meant "in real life" and TMI was "too much info"  They do have a list of abbreviations somewhere on this site.

I still can't figure out this one though- I know someone who said they are trying to have a baby and they used the letters TTC??? 

All I can come up with was the words Test tube 

I am sure someone here can tell me what it is.


----------



## Bill Brown

maddhatir said:


> That's OK! People use some many abbreviations on the Dis it is hard to keep up! Heck I just found out recently that IRL meant "in real life" and TMI was "too much info"  They do have a list of abbreviations somewhere on this site.
> 
> I still can't figure out this one though- I know someone who said they are trying to have a baby and they used the letters TTC???
> 
> All I can come up with was the words Test tube
> 
> I am sure someone here can tell me what it is.


Don't know about TTC(Transportation and Ticket Center?) and getting pregnant.  However, I use this AllEars.Net page to find out what most of the abbreviations mean that folks use on DISboards.


----------



## maddhatir

Bill Brown said:


> Don't know about TTC(Transportation and Ticket Center?) and getting pregnant.  However, I use this AllEars.Net page to find out what most of the abbreviations mean that folks use on DISboards.



If it means Transportation and Ticket Center- I don't even wanna KNOW what happened!


----------



## PhotobearSam

TTC....Trying to Conceive...


The one I had the hardest time with was KWIM...I thought it must mean something DIRTY but it means "Know What I Mean?"


 


I feel so old at times...Anyone want to be my BFF???


----------



## Bill Brown

PhotobearSam said:


> TTC....Trying to Conceive...


I wouldn't have guessed that in a lifetime.


----------



## PhotobearSam

Bill Brown said:


> I wouldn't have guessed that in a lifetime.



Probably because you are child-free... I only know because I have a friend who is trying now and she uses that term on her emails.



I am just never going to look at the TTC at Disney the same way again...


----------



## zima-cheryl

http://www.wdwinfo.com/abbreviations.htm

I use this website a lot too look up those abbreviations...  I know what you mean about feeling old.  What gets me is the folks at work using these (and the little smiley faces) in their e-mails.  Talk about unprofessional!!!  


Oh - By the way, there is a new Foamy cartoon out.
http://www.illwillpress.com/door22.html

Be forewarned... this little squirrel is crass, rude and wicked funny!

Off to bed now... TGIF tomorrow!  Weekend is supposed to be nice so I'll be edging my new tree & flower bed  

On Saturday night we are going to a minor leauge baseball game (seats 6 rows behind home plate, just $10!).  Get me a beer & some peanuts, AAAhhhh... life doesn't get any better than this (well except maybe during hockey season)!


----------



## Bill Brown

zima-cheryl said:


> http://www.wdwinfo.com/abbreviations.htm
> 
> I use this website a lot too look up those abbreviations...  I know what you mean about feeling old.  What gets me is the folks at work using these (and the little smiley faces) in their e-mails.  Talk about unprofessional!!!


The Intranet where I work uses Notes for email, which is smiley face-free.  However, we manage to exchange a whole lot of less than professional looking emails.


----------



## Bill Brown

PhotobearSam said:


> Probably because you are child-free...


----------



## PoohNTuck

Funny posts since my last one... always like to catch up with you all once in awhile...

What DOES Absinthe taste like?  Or is it just something I'll have to breakdown and experience for myself at some point?  Don't say chicken or I'll know you're teasing.  It's just that I'm not a big liquor fan...wine, beer, wine coolers (ssh, don't tell!) and long islands are about the closest I come but... any suggestions on similar tasting liquor?

Maddhattir, good post on common sense!  Much appreciated.  Have never seen that before.  

As for George Carlin, Time had a nice 1 page article about his pivotal role in comedy and we have 3 or 4 cassette tapes (anyone remember those?) with his live acts which hubby has insisted we listen to in his memory this summer.  We're sentimental creatures 

Have a lovely weekend... as always, I'll be at work wishing I was on vacation... when are we going to Disney???  With the prices so high we've been planning other trips but it's still on my radar!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Oh - By the way, there is a new Foamy cartoon out.
> http://www.illwillpress.com/door22.html
> 
> Be forewarned... this little squirrel is crass, rude and wicked funny!
> 
> On Saturday night we are going to a minor leauge baseball game (seats 6 rows behind home plate, just $10!).  Get me a beer & some peanuts, AAAhhhh... life doesn't get any better than this (well except maybe during hockey season)!



OMG! I LUV Foamy! He is my kinda squirrel! I have to go check it out! I loved the last one 

Have a great time at the game- we are heading down the shore tonight and tomorrow we will once again attempt to catch some wind in our sails! And then later in the day we are going to the Boardwalk to meet up with friends. Hopefully the freaks stay home this weekend! 



PoohNTuck said:


> What DOES Absinthe taste like?  Or is it just something I'll have to breakdown and experience for myself at some point?  Don't say chicken or I'll know you're teasing.  It's just that I'm not a big liquor fan...wine, beer, wine coolers (ssh, don't tell!) and long islands are about the closest I come but... any suggestions on similar tasting liquor?
> 
> Maddhattir, good post on common sense!  Much appreciated.  Have never seen that before.



It tastes like licorice. I do not like licorice, but I deal with it. I am kind of trashy, I do not add the sugar to it, I sip my absinthe and then take a sip of coke I discovered that by accident- but OMG does it work! It cuts the "burning" right out! 

I am not sure about the Absinthe's quality here in the States right now- we just started getting it here and I heard it is not very good- but I guess if it gets you buzzed you are good to go! 




PhotobearSam said:


> I feel so old at times...Anyone want to be my BFF???



Awww Sam- we are all you BFF!!!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Bill Brown said:


> I wouldn't have guessed that in a lifetime.



 All I could think of was *T*est *T*ube "something or other"


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> It tastes like licorice. I do not like licorice, but I deal with it. I am kind of trashy, I do not add the sugar to it, I sip my absinthe and then take a sip of coke I discovered that by accident- but OMG does it work! It cuts the "burning" right out!
> 
> I am not sure about the Absinthe's quality here in the States right now- we just started getting it here and I heard it is not very good- but I guess if it gets you buzzed you are good to go!
> 
> 
> Awww Sam- we are all you BFF!!!!!




one of my friends sips Dr. Pepper after a sip of absinthe as well!!  I've tried it both ways and go either...Like you I don't know about the stuff in the States, I've only had it from Europe!


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> one of my friends sips Dr. Pepper after a sip of absinthe as well!!  I've tried it both ways and go either...Like you I don't know about the stuff in the States, I've only had it from Europe!



Wow- then I am not trashy afterall 

They better hurry up and get some good stuff here in the States- those overseas shipping charges KILL ya!


----------



## TKDisneylover

The "absinthe" has really peaked my interest so I did a little online research, here is the link: http://www.absinthefever.com/absinthe/drink

Here are a few comments I found interesting also:

"How you enjoy your absinthe is a matter of preference, therefore, as is the time, the occasion or indeed the frequency. Absinthe is currently becoming the drink of choice at grand dinner parties, where it provides refreshment before, during and after the meal: as a pre-dinner drink, in mid-course sorbet, and as a digestive. That is a whole lot of absinthe -- and we'll drink to that!"

Arthur Rimbaud, the brilliant poet, celebrated the delights of absinthe and the Louche ritual when he wrote:
"When the poet's pain is soothed by a liquid jewel held in the sacred chalice, upon which rests the pierced spoon, the crystal sweetness, icy streams trickle down. The darkest forest melts into an open meadow. Waves of green seduce. Sanity surrendered, the soul spirals toward the murky depths, wherein lies the beautiful madness - absinthe."

"Is absinthe an aphrodisiac? Oh, sure, definitely. Definitely works for me," said Lee Davis, a psychology student from Australia, in an email to Absinthe Fever. "My girlfriend and I always have a wild time under the influence of the Fairy! Mind you, we don't drink often, and not too much. But when we do, it lifts the whole experience to stratospheric levels. Absinthe challenges whatever expectations you have about how stuff should feel, on an physical and emotinal level as well. Everything is so much intensified. Sometimes you even experience sensations you never knew existed!"
Lee clearly is a very keen proponent of absinthe's aphrodisiac powers -- but his comments perhaps do point us towards the crux of the issue. Perhaps the question to ask is not "Is absinthe an aphrodisiac?", but rather "Can absinthe enhance sexual experience?" It seems most fans of absinthe answer a firm "yes" to the latter.

*Madd*, as a side note, I was surprised that absinthe has led me to 18th Century France (absinthe originally was made & drank in 17th Century France, but gained popularity in the 18th Century).  I find it interesting that since we've discussed past life regression and my thoughts of living in that specific time period that it has popped up again!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Sorry - I'm a little off topic, but I know there are a couple of folks on the board who would appriciate this...

It is a new Bed & Breakfast my husband found listed in the Boston area...

http://www.lizzie-borden.com/Default.aspx


----------



## PhotobearSam

zima-cheryl said:


> Sorry - I'm a little off topic, but I know there are a couple of folks on the board who would appriciate this...
> 
> It is a new Bed & Breakfast my husband found listed in the Boston area...
> 
> http://www.lizzie-borden.com/Default.aspx


Neat but I don't know if I could stay there....


----------



## KirklandTutu

zima-cheryl said:


> Sorry - I'm a little off topic, but I know there are a couple of folks on the board who would appriciate this...
> 
> It is a new Bed & Breakfast my husband found listed in the Boston area...
> 
> http://www.lizzie-borden.com/Default.aspx



On this topic, I'm a combination of these...

 
 


But heck, if you can make a ballet out of the story, why not a bed and breakfast out of the murder site.
I didn't realize she was acquited, though.  huh.  Wonder what ever happened to ol lizzie


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> *Madd*, as a side note, I was surprised that absinthe has led me to 18th Century France (absinthe originally was made & drank in 17th Century France, but gained popularity in the 18th Century).  I find it interesting that since we've discussed past life regression and my thoughts of living in that specific time period that it has popped up again!



Very interesting where it has led you! I think you should get a bottle and see what happens- maybe you will get some "flashbacks" of a former life! 




zima-cheryl said:


> Sorry - I'm a little off topic, but I know there are a couple of folks on the board who would appriciate this...
> 
> It is a new Bed & Breakfast my husband found listed in the Boston area...
> 
> http://www.lizzie-borden.com/Default.aspx



I have heard of this place- (go figure- huh? ) I have also read about a prison that was turned into a B&B!

As long as it is haunted- I am "Inn"  HA!!! Inn, get it It's too early!


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> Sorry - I'm a little off topic, but I know there are a couple of folks on the board who would appriciate this...
> 
> It is a new Bed & Breakfast my husband found listed in the Boston area...
> 
> http://www.lizzie-borden.com/Default.aspx



I was always a big fan of the movie "Lizzie Borden," Elizabeth Montgomery played Lizzie.  Ghost Hunters & MonsterQuest both did a "ghost hunt" there, I don't think Ghost Hunters found anything but MonsterQuest did record a female voice in Lizzie's bedroom.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I was always a big fan of the movie "Lizzie Borden," Elizabeth Montgomery played Lizzie.  Ghost Hunters & MonsterQuest, I don't think Ghost Hunters found anything but MonsterQuest did record a female voice in Lizzie's bedroom.



OF COURSE GH did not find anything 

Guess what? I watch the Kids show with Chip Coffey- OK- the one I saw was very good UNTIL! the end. All the girl had to say to the demonic presence was "leave me alone", they said a PRAYER- and it was all peachy the next day!

I will watch the show 3/4 of the way and then erase it before the end in the future 

I also saw GH International- I do not like the lead guy. He tries to be line Jason It is annoying. But I will keep watching.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Very interesting where it has led you! I think you should get a bottle and see what happens- maybe you will get some "flashbacks" of a former life!



Actually we did just that yesterday.  I picked up a bottle of *Lucid* absinthe (56% alcohol) for $50 at our local liquor store.  I checked out their website and they "claim" that their absinthe is the real thing.  They had instructions on how to "louche" the absinthe with the sugar cube & chilled water.  I have to admit that makes a difference compared to drinking it straight up!  They suggested 1 1/2 oz. absinthe with 4-5 oz. chilled water poured over the sugar cube.  It worked out perfectly and was just the right flavor.

Their website also claims that the content of wormwood & thujold is *more* in their product than the content of the antique bottles they had found from antique dealers that they tested.  Not sure how true that is until I have the opportunity to compare it with the stuff you can buy online from overseas.

We each had 3 glasses prepared as they suggested and did not see the "green fairy" nor did I hullucinate.  I guess I will have to drink more next time.....


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> OF COURSE GH did not find anything
> 
> Guess what? I watch the Kids show with Chip Coffey- OK- the one I saw was very good UNTIL! the end. All the girl had to say to the demonic presence was "leave me alone", they said a PRAYER- and it was all peachy the next day!
> 
> I will watch the show 3/4 of the way and then erase it before the end in the future
> 
> I also saw GH International- I do not like the lead guy. He tries to be line Jason It is annoying. But I will keep watching.



You know I think that is the first time I have seen them pray.  I do not recall them doing that in the first few episodes.

And your right about Rob trying to be like Jason, and it is annoying, but I seem to be getting a little more used to him.  He seems to have lightened up a big since last season.  Did you ever catch up with your old episodes of GH and see the ones where Barry is first introdued?


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Actually we did just that yesterday.  I picked up a bottle of *Lucid* absinthe (56% alcohol) for $50 at our local liquor store.  I checked out their website and they "claim" that their absinthe is the real thing.  They had instructions on how to "louche" the absinthe with the sugar cube & chilled water.  I have to admit that makes a difference compared to drinking it straight up!  They suggested 1 1/2 oz. absinthe with 4-5 oz. chilled water poured over the sugar cube.  It worked out perfectly and was just the right flavor.
> 
> Their website also claims that the content of wormwood & thujold is *more* in their product than the content of the antique bottles they had found from antique dealers that they tested.  Not sure how true that is until I have the opportunity to compare it with the stuff you can buy online from overseas.
> 
> We each had 3 glasses prepared as they suggested and did not see the "green fairy" nor did I hullucinate.  I guess I will have to drink more next time.....



I would check out other absinthe sites to read up on Lucid- I am sure they will make their product sound great on their site.  

Honestly- I do not believe what people say about hallucinating on absinthe. Sure- long ago they probably did b/c of the way they made it- but now- I don't think so. 

The only thing I have felt when drinking it was, buzzed.  



TKDisneylover said:


> Did you ever catch up with your old episodes of GH and see the ones where Barry is first introdued?



Yes- I am all caught up and I did see him on GHI.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> The only thing I have felt when drinking it was, buzzed.



 

It was funny because when we first started drinking it DH was a little too thirsty and drank it down pretty quick, plus it was just before dinner so he had an empty stomach.  He says, "wow, do you feel a buzz from this already?" I looked at his glass and see that it is almost empty and mine is 3/4 full yet.  I told him I would be buzzed too if I drank that much that fast!  He looked at my glass and says, "oh yeah, I guess so."  He did say he had quite an interesting buss going and that it felt different from the usual alcohol buzz.  I myself got a mild buzz from it but didn't want to drink too much because it was Sunday and I had to get up early the following morning.  I'm finding that as I've gotten older my recovery time is'nt as quick as it used to be.   However I may just experiment when I get home tonight and see if I notice anything different.


----------



## MistyMoss

maddhatir said:


> Glad to see you made it here- SO! You didn't tell us if you and your DW want any kiddies!
> 
> My brother was saying someting about Tom Araya- hmmmm- when did this happen? I think it is kind of odd to hear a born again christian sing Slayer lyrics It's just not the same!
> 
> BTW- one day I e-mailed one of the DJs (heck- is that what they are called still??) on Sirius to yell at them for never playing "He!! Awaits" OMG- I just LOVE when they say....."He!!!!!!! AAAAAw_aiiiiits_"!!!! That is all I need- just that part of the song
> 
> We have another "Queen of Metal Darkness" here- as Hixski (*RIP* *moment of silence* *kneels* *does a sign of the cross* *falls over trying to get up* ) once dubbed us. I am not sure where she is- She is a sicko Slipknot fan- sicko in a good way of course!
> 
> Knowing her- I would not be surprised if she is touring with the guys on their _Mayhem_ bus as we speak, helping them break in their new masks!
> 
> Switching gears- Hey Sam! Your thread went over well!  I was surprised you were not attacked and beaten for it



I have been lurking for awhile and thought I should pop in and say "HI"!! I feel I know all of you already. 

I really like that title of "Queen of Metal Darkness"!! That Hixski person must be very clever!!! 

I need to pop over to that Metal thread. My metal goes more to old metal like AC/DC, Metallica and the likes.


----------



## maddhatir

MistyMoss said:


> I have been lurking for awhile and thought I should pop in and say "HI"!! I feel I know all of you already.
> 
> I really like that title of "Queen of Metal Darkness"!! That Hixski person must be very clever!!!
> 
> I need to pop over to that Metal thread. My metal goes more to old metal like AC/DC, Metallica and the likes.



Welcome!!

Yes! All Hail Hix 

 

Actually I was going to stop by and post something I saw on Nanny 911 tonight- yes, I am a dork, I watch reruns of the show- I like Nanny Deb much more than Super Nanny!

Anyway- this ANNOYING as H#!! mom on the show said something that sums up so many parents these days:

"I don't think Matt and I are _bad_ parents, I think we are _clueless_ parents"      


.


----------



## TKDisneylover

MistyMoss said:


> I have been lurking for awhile and thought I should pop in and say "HI"!! I feel I know all of you already.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Actually I was going to stop by and post something I saw on Nanny 911 tonight- yes, I am a dork, I watch reruns of the show- I like Nanny Deb much more than Super Nanny!



I used to watch both shows, but after a while when the children would start crying it was like nails on a chalkboard to my brain so I had to stop watching.   The only place I can tolerate that is at WDW.



> Anyway- this ANNOYING as H#!! mom on the show said something that sums up so many parents these days:]
> 
> "I don't think Matt and I are _bad_ parents, I think we are _clueless_ parents"      .



This statement holds true for many, many parents!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Hey Everyone!

I just have to brag.  My kid sister (she's 36) has gotten back into BMX Bike (as in bicycle) Racing after 20 years of not doing it.  She and her husband have also chosen to be child-free.  She's having a great time doing this during her "free" time.  I'm really proud of her!

They live here in WI.  These were National races in Minnesota, she's the one in the red racing outfit.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=_OtxKb8IPBc


----------



## PhotobearSam

Well, butter my butt and call me biscuit!!! I have actually found a DECENT TEENAGER!!!!


We hired a young girl to work the laundry room at our motel. It was her first day today and I already gave her a raise....She is so neat, self-sufficient and polite.

She folded the sheets so well I thought they were pressed. She even impressed the older cleaning ladies.


I just wanted to come on here and say that there is some hope for the future.


----------



## TKDisneylover

PhotobearSam said:


> Well, butter my butt and call me biscuit!!! I have actually found a DECENT TEENAGER!!!!
> 
> We hired a young girl to work the laundry room at our motel. It was her first day today and I already gave her a raise....She is so neat, self-sufficient and polite.
> 
> She folded the sheets so well I thought they were pressed. She even impressed the older cleaning ladies.
> 
> I just wanted to come on here and say that there is some hope for the future.



CONGRATULATIONS!!!  I know you've been trying to find some decent help for a while!  I got a kick out of the first line of your post (butter my butt...) and read it to a couple social workers that were standing in my office (they work with juvenile delinquents), they got a kick out of it!  I explained our previous complaints about kids who do not want to work.  They can relate in the sense that their clients owe restitution and are supposed to get jobs to pay it off, but they just can't seem to find a job blah, blah, blah!

I hope this person continues to work out for you.


----------



## zima-cheryl

PhotobearSam said:


> Well, butter my butt and call me biscuit!!!




OK - you're a biscuit!!!


----------



## MistyMoss

PhotobearSam said:


> _Well, butter my butt and call me biscuit!!! _I have actually found a DECENT TEENAGER!!!!



You must live in "southern" Canada!!! Glad you finally found someone decent!!


----------



## PhotobearSam

MistyMoss said:


> You must live in "southern" Canada!!! Glad you finally found someone decent!!



I am actually quting a pic of a cat I found on icanhascheeseburger.com

Southern Canada...YUP


----------



## TKDisneylover

HAPPY HUMP DAY TO ALL THE CF PEEPS OUT THERE! 

It's been very quiet on this thread for the last few days so I thought I would bump it up. 

DH & I have been in the process of building a new deck (well he's actually doing most of the work  ), but I'm so excited about it!  It's 10' x 20' which is the same size as our livingroom and will give us lots of room to stretch out and enjoy mother nature.  Now I'm not bragging here, but we do have a beautiful backyard and we have been lucky to have deer, wild turkey and a variety of other little critters visit our yard regularly.  We also have many bird feeders and have been fortunate to have orioles & rose breasted grossbeaks migrate through and decide to nest for the season.  I just love being outside in the early morning hours and listen to the sounds of nature.  It must be those long winters that help me appreciate it so much!  Okay I guess that all sounded a bit sappy, but heck, that's just me! 

So what has everyone else been up to lately?  Hope all has been well!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> HAPPY HUMP DAY TO ALL THE CF PEEPS OUT THERE!
> 
> It's been very quiet on this thread for the last few days so I thought I would bump it up.
> 
> DH & I have been in the process of building a new deck (well he's actually doing most of the work  ), but I'm so excited about it!  It's 10' x 20' which is the same size as our livingroom and will give us lots of room to stretch out and enjoy mother nature.  Now I'm not bragging here, but we do have a beautiful backyard and we have been lucky to have deer, wild turkey and a variety of other little critters visit our yard regularly.  We also have many bird feeders and have been fortunate to have orioles & rose breasted grossbeaks migrate through and decide to nest for the season.  I just love being outside in the early morning hours and listen to the sounds of nature.  It must be those long winters that help me appreciate it so much!  Okay I guess that all sounded a bit sappy, but heck, that's just me!
> 
> So what has everyone else been up to lately?  Hope all has been well!



Yay for you! We just screened in our new porch (18x20) It is awesome to be able to sit outside and enjoy life!

I don't think you are sappy at all! I love so relax outside with Mom Nature! I love watching the nutty squirrels- we also have wild turkeys. Last week there was a bird that I THINK may have been a Hawk- it was a reddish tan color??  I tried to get a pic of it, but it flew away. 

Funny- b/c I was down the shore this weekend and SIL and her 2 little ones were there. SIL was sitting alone on the balcony and I poked my head out and asked her if she minded some company. She said not at all- I said, I thought you might want to enjoy some peace and quiet for a while- she said she does not get much of that with the kids and she is used to not having it! 

I would never be able to have little tornadoes (aka: kids! ) around me all the time- I need peace and quiet and no drama. I almost went batty with the kids AND a puppy the whole weekend! I couldn't breath at times! I don't know how people do it! 

This weekend is my b-day and it is the one day DH can't so no to what I want to do I am choosing to go into the city (Philly) and take a historical walking tour.

We have been going into the city for about 25 years now, we have passed Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell 100s of times, and have taken them for granted b/c they are always there! I want to actually see them up close and personal. I want stories. 

DH said fine- I think he has wanted to do it for some time now too.


----------



## MistyMoss

maddhatir said:


> Yay for you! We just screened in our new porch (18x20) It is awesome to be able to sit outside and enjoy life!
> 
> I don't think you are sappy at all! I love so relax outside with Mom Nature! I love watching the nutty squirrels- we also have wild turkeys.* Last week there was a bird that I THINK may have been a Hawk- it was a reddish tan color??  I tried to get a pic of it, but it flew away.*
> 
> Funny- b/c I was down the shore this weekend and SIL and her 2 little ones were there. SIL was sitting alone on the balcony and I poked my head out and asked her if she minded some company. She said not at all- I said, I thought you might want to enjoy some peace and quiet for a while- she said she does not get much of that with the kids and she is used to not having it!
> 
> I would never be able to have little tornadoes (aka: kids! ) around me all the time- I need peace and quiet and no drama. I almost went batty with the kids AND a puppy the whole weekend! I couldn't breath at times! I don't know how people do it!
> 
> *This weekend is my b-day and it is the one day DH can't so no to what I want to do I am choosing to go into the city (Philly) and take a historical walking tour.*
> We have been going into the city for about 25 years now, we have passed Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell 100s of times, and have taken them for granted b/c they are always there! I want to actually see them up close and personal. I want stories.
> 
> DH said fine- I think he has wanted to do it for some time now too.



Duncan (our golden retriever) was bugging my one day to go outside. I knew he had spotted something but I thought it was a squirrel or a bunny. I almost let him out when I spotted what he had seen. It was a huge hawk sitting on our fence. All I could think of was Duncan with big claw marks all over him.............I didn't let him out till that hawk flew away.

And not to forget the most important part............

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MADD!!!!  Queen of Metal Darkness!!!!

Should we make this a new holiday!!??


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Yay for you! We just screened in our new porch (18x20) It is awesome to be able to sit outside and enjoy life!



Now that would be nice to have it screened in too!  I know we are going to go through lots of bug spray in the thick of summer like it is now to keep the vampires, I mean mosquitos under control!  



> I don't think you are sappy at all! I love so relax outside with Mom Nature! I love watching the nutty squirrels- we also have wild turkeys. Last week there was a bird that I THINK may have been a Hawk- it was a reddish tan color??  I tried to get a pic of it, but it flew away.



Hawks are very cool to watch, we have had a few decide to sit in our birdbath.  They are so big they take up the entire thing, it's kind of commical to watch them try to bathe.  The last hawk that went through decided to stop by for breakfast, he enjoyed bluejay.   I hate when that happens, I know it natures way, but please don't do it in my backyard!   



> Funny- b/c I was down the shore this weekend and SIL and her 2 little ones were there. SIL was sitting alone on the balcony and I poked my head out and asked her if she minded some company. She said not at all- I said, I thought you might want to enjoy some peace and quiet for a while- she said she does not get much of that with the kids and she is used to not having it!
> 
> I would never be able to have little tornadoes (aka: kids! ) around me all the time- I need peace and quiet and no drama. I almost went batty with the kids AND a puppy the whole weekend! I couldn't breath at times! I don't know how people do it!



I agree, I don't know how they do it!  That reminds me of a topic we were discussing at work yesterday about foster care (a typical topic because I work at Human Services), one of our social workers is also a foster mom.  They were talking about the *benefit* of receiving $2,700.00 a month per kid.  She and her DH chose not to have children, but chose to take in foster kids.  Someone had said "I wouldn't mind taking care of kids if I got paid $2700 a month for them!"  My response was, you can have the $2700 and I'll continue to enjoy my peaceful life!  They all chuckled and said, "yeah that would be nice."  They all have kids who have now reached the teenage years. 



> This weekend is my b-day and it is the one day DH can't so no to what I want to do I am choosing to go into the city (Philly) and take a historical walking tour.



   I hope you have a great birthday weekend!



> We have been going into the city for about 25 years now, we have passed Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell 100s of times, and have taken them for granted b/c they are always there! I want to actually see them up close and personal. I want stories.



Ever since I saw the movie National Treasure I have wanted to visit Philly.  I think it would be great to see all those historical sites!  I'm sure you will come back with some interesting info about the past, or maybe even a possible feeling of deja vu?  Please share!


----------



## TKDisneylover

MistyMoss said:


> Duncan (our golden retriever) was bugging my one day to go outside. I knew he had spotted something but I thought it was a squirrel or a bunny. I almost let him out when I spotted what he had seen. It was a huge hawk sitting on our fence. All I could think of was Duncan with big claw marks all over him.............I didn't let him out till that hawk flew away.



I have heard that people with small dogs and puppies have had their animals attacked by hawks.  Apparently the hawk can literally pick them up and fly away with them!  How scary would that be!!??


----------



## maddhatir

MistyMoss said:


> And not to forget the most important part............
> 
> HAPPY BIRTHDAY MADD!!!!  Queen of Metal Darkness!!!!
> 
> Should we make this a new holiday!!??





TKDisneylover said:


> The last hawk that went through decided to stop by for breakfast, he enjoyed bluejay.   I hate when that happens, I know it natures way, but please don't do it in my backyard!
> 
> 
> 
> I hope you have a great birthday weekend!
> 
> Ever since I saw the movie National Treasure I have wanted to visit Philly.  I think it would be great to see all those historical sites!  I'm sure you will come back with some interesting info about the past, or maybe even a possible feeling of deja vu?  Please share!




Thank you for the b-day wishes! Please, Please, no hoilday, I don't deserve it.....really 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			
		
		
	


	




What made me look outside (when I saw what could have been a hawk) was, the blue jays were SCREAMING! non stop!

The last time I heard that many birds screaming, I was walking in the backyard and almost stepped on a snake! I think they knew the snake was down there. 

A few years back when we lived in our condo- it faced the woods- I heard the birds making a ruckus (What ruckus? Could you describe the ruckus I am sorry- I am quoting The Breakfast Club, I could not resist! anytime DH or I say that word, we have to follow up with that quote...along with Clair is a fat girls name....and can't forget- Smoke up Johnny! )  

OK sidetracked, I'm back- birds making a ruckus.....and there was a fox walking around back there!

Tammy, I am taking my camera in hopes of getting an orb or something cool- I know there are a few cemeteries in the area we will be walking in, they might be on the tour- but I will go back afterwards and spend some time looking around.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> What made me look outside (when I saw what could have been a hawk) was, the blue jays were SCREAMING! non stop!
> 
> The last time I heard that many birds screaming, I was walking in the backyard and almost stepped on a snake! I think they knew the snake was down there.



See, those bluejays know when something is coming to eat them!  A snake!? Yikes! 



> (What ruckus? Could you describe the ruckus I am sorry- I am quoting The Breakfast Club, I could not resist! anytime DH or I say that word, we have to follow up with that quote...along with Clair is a fat girls name....and can't forget- Smoke up Johnny! ) [/SIZE]



I love the Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, Pretty in Pink, Fast Times at Ridgemont High they all had great lines in them!  DH is always saying Smoke up Johnny!  but we actually do not smoke cigarettes.  



> OK sidetracked, I'm back- birds making a ruckus.....and there was a fox walking around back there!



We had seen a coyote about a month ago.  And this was after we had seen a fawn (she was so cute and tiny), run up from the woods.  DH actually caught her and sent her back into the woods where she belonged with her mother.  Then 30 minutes later out walks a coyote, but I don't think he got the fawn because we would have heard a "ruckus"  which we did not.  When DH picked up the fawn she bleated, like a sheep sounds but really, really loud.  So I'm sure that's what alerted the coyote to begin with, but I took off after that thing and scared into the woods the opposite direction of the fawn.  That was amazing!  DH let me pet the fawn real quick before we let it go, I wish I would have thought to get the camera but all I could think of was that this poor thing was going the wrong direction and needed to get back to it's mother.



> Tammy, I am taking my camera in hopes of getting an orb or something cool- I know there are a few cemeteries in the area we will be walking in, they might be on the tour- but I will go back afterwards and spend some time looking around.



Good luck with that, I hope you catch something.  Ohhhh, cemetaries, I love 'em!


----------



## PhotobearSam

Happy Birthday MADD!!! YOU ROCK!!!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> When DH picked up the fawn she bleated, like a sheep sounds but really, really loud.



ooo- I hope he did not get the baby! 

When I used to feed the deer behind my condo- they would make a loud snort- and stomp their hoofs and scare the CA-RAP! out of me! It was not b/c I was coming w/ food- I guess they just were spooked by something b/c they would all just take off running.

After a while the babies would get used to me coming back to feed them and start running out of the woods towards me. I would stomp my foot to scare them though. I did it for their own good- but to tell you the truth it was a little scary to see them coming towards you! eeeek!  

Back to kids- I was listening to Sirius Hard Attack this morning and the DJ commented on how America has become a bunch of wussies (he did not use wussies-  ) he was talking about how everyone has to be a winner! Boy- I guess WE are not the only "_losers_" talking about THAT! That seems to be a hot topic.

He went on to say how when he was young and played in little league- he did not get picked to be on the All-Star team- he said that ONLY made him want to try harder for next time! ahhhhh- yeah! That's the way is supposed to go!

A few weeks back I was at a 2 yr old b-day party and they were playing some game. I was not in the vicinity of said game, however, I did happen to hear my nephew, 3, screaming his lungs out. I gotta go see the commotion- now, my 3 yr old nephew is OBSESSED with Thomas the Train. I look over and see my 2 yr old nephew WITH the train that HE won- the 2yr old won the train NOT the 3 yr old. But- the 3 yr old WANTED the train!

I love the kid to death but I said- "suck it up, you can't be a winner all the time!" I heard 2 yr old's mommy say that 3yr old can have the train. 

I had to walk away after that b/c I did not want to be witness to the further decline of this young generation


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Happy Birthday MADD!!! YOU ROCK!!!



Thanks Sam!

How's business??? And how is your new employee working out!?


----------



## maddhatir

OMG! My yard is under attack by the hawk right now!

I am going to cry just listening to the blue jays screaming and then all of a sudden (2x so far) I just hear this awful cry, like maybe the hawk got something and carried it away! I don't even want to look and see what it could be 

I did see the hawk in the tree where the blue jays are screaming and I know there is a squirrels nest in that tree......ugh- I am sick to my stomach that I can't do anything.....

.........the screaming has just stopped....for now 

Oh BTW- Happy Friday................


----------



## maddhatir

MORE death in my yard!

I am sitting by my window working and all I heard was this loud- *thud*- I peek out and what do I see NOW!?

My neighbor's cat with a bird in his mouth!

Help! I can take all of this little animal death today!

How ironic would it be if I saw the cat, with the bird in his mouth, being carried away by the hawk! I think i would have to call it a day!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> MORE death in my yard!
> 
> I am sitting by my window working and all I heard was this loud- *thud*- I peek out and what do I see NOW!?
> 
> My neighbor's cat with a bird in his mouth!
> 
> Help! I can take all of this little animal death today!
> 
> How ironic would it be if I saw the cat, with the bird in his mouth, being carried away by the hawk! I think i would have to call it a day!



 Happy Birthday Madd!   

I know what you mean about the cats...  I'm ruthless w/our neighborhood cats.  I've no qualms w/chasing them or dousing them w/the hose (DH won't let me use the BB gun!).  I catch one I'm calling Animal Control to haul it off to the pound.  I hate finding my birds dead in the yard.  (Not to mention they like using some flower beds as a litter box, YUCK!)

What you need to do about the hawks is attract some crows.  We have a family of 4 or 5 crows that consider our neighborhood home.  We feed them scraps...they escort away the hawks, and any other undesirables that wander into the neighborhood.  It is a lovely agreement.  Plus, they are amazing to watch...very intelligent birds.

Enjoy your day in Philly!  Sounds like it will be a lot of fun.


----------



## PhotobearSam

maddhatir said:


> Thanks Sam!
> 
> How's business??? And how is your new employee working out!?




Our new girl is awesome. She is the best worker I have ever seen at her age.
I finally found a good crew and 3 are coming back next year too...so I will only need to find one next year. They have even told me I am their favorite boss ever!!!


Business is slow. Gas prices have hurt us but oh well....it will get better. 



I hope you had an awesome birthday.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Happy Birthday Madd!
> 
> I know what you mean about the cats...  I'm ruthless w/our neighborhood cats.  I've no qualms w/chasing them or dousing them w/the hose (DH won't let me use the BB gun!).  I catch one I'm calling Animal Control to haul it off to the pound.  I hate finding my birds dead in the yard.  (Not to mention they like using some flower beds as a litter box, YUCK!)
> 
> What you need to do about the hawks is attract some crows.  We have a family of 4 or 5 crows that consider our neighborhood home.  We feed them scraps...they escort away the hawks, and any other undesirables that wander into the neighborhood.  It is a lovely agreement.  Plus, they are amazing to watch...very intelligent birds.
> 
> Enjoy your day in Philly!  Sounds like it will be a lot of fun.



Thanks for the b-day wishes!

Ekkk- I can't do that the kitties!  At least he took the bird home with him.  

I love animals, that is why my head is spinning- I know the hawk has to eat- but at the same time- I do not want to hear all the blood curdling commotion that surrounds the hunt! 

We have lots of black birds- are they the same thing as crows?? We should have a lot of them in the yard b/c DH has his compost pile out back- scraps galore! 

 One of the squirrels must have carried a potato to the front yard and dropped it in a not yet finished flower bed- we now have a vine growing out of the ground I want to see what it does. 

Sam, glad to hear you are happy with your employees, now the customers need to start coming in! It is sad what the gas prices are doing to the economy! 

I saw a show on how the people of China are now moving up to middle class and can afford cars- which means, more gas! You should see these people! Most of the adults have never driven in their lives and they just hop in cars..and go! No driving school! It is like chaos on the streets! 

They say that the Buick is a status symbol for them, if you have a Buick, you are upper class! 

So- one of the reasons we now have to pay higher prices in gas- is b/c China is now driving in record numbers! (Isn't that the case in India too?)


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> How ironic would it be if I saw the cat, with the bird in his mouth, being carried away by the hawk! I think i would have to call it a day!



Now that would be something to see! 



zima-cheryl said:


> I know what you mean about the cats...  I'm ruthless w/our neighborhood cats.  I've no qualms w/chasing them or dousing them w/the hose (DH won't let me use the BB gun!).  I catch one I'm calling Animal Control to haul it off to the pound.  I hate finding my birds dead in the yard.  (Not to mention they like using some flower beds as a litter box, YUCK!)
> 
> What you need to do about the hawks is attract some crows.  We have a family of 4 or 5 crows that consider our neighborhood home.  We feed them scraps...they escort away the hawks, and any other undesirables that wander into the neighborhood.  It is a lovely agreement.  Plus, they are amazing to watch...very intelligent birds.



We do not have problems with stray cats, I think the coyote's keep them under control.  I would not like them using my flower beds as a littler box, YUCK! is right.

We have crows that come around (*Madd,* they are twice the size of blackbirds and they "caw", you can't mistake them.  And they typically come around in a "murder," I believe that's what they consider a group of them), they can be really noisy.  There was a crow's nest in our neighbors pine tree last summer, they woke us up every morning as the sun rose.  I will admit though that it was interesting to watch as the little ones matured and were learning to caw, they sounded a little sickly for a while.



PhotobearSam said:


> They have even told me I am their favorite boss ever!!!



Now that's an awesome compliment, good for you!  I hope business starts picking up for you.



maddhatir said:


> So- one of the reasons we now have to pay higher prices in gas- is b/c China is now driving in record numbers! (Isn't that the case in India too?)



They are also one of the major contributors to air pollution.  They do not recycle, or use any type of "clean air act" in their country.  I wonder if those Buicks have catalytic converters on them to prevent pollution.


HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND EVERYONE!!​


----------



## zima-cheryl

TKDisneylover said:


> We have crows that come around (*Madd,* they are twice the size of blackbirds and they "caw", you can't mistake them.  And they typically come around in a "murder," I believe that's what they consider a group of them), they can be really noisy.



Don't you just love that... a murder of crows...  Sounds kinda poetic.

Madd - you would know if they were crows.  Crows are _huge _birds.
We have 1 that I'm sure outweighs our 17 pound cat.  That doesn't stop Boots from "hunting" the crow from behind the window.  Boots ever got outside that crow would have him for lunch!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Don't you just love that... a murder of crows...  Sounds kinda poetic.
> 
> Madd - you would know if they were crows.  Crows are _huge _birds.
> We have 1 that I'm sure outweighs our 17 pound cat.  That doesn't stop Boots from "hunting" the crow from behind the window.  Boots ever got outside that crow would have him for lunch!



OK- I have seen crows- they are usually in the middle of the road trying to pick up the road kill! 

We only have black birds that hang out in our yard though.


----------



## shaqie1

I too am from NJ and have chosen not to have children. I am a school teacher so I probably hear it more often then you.When people ask me why I don't want kids,I just ask them why they want them. Usually they don't know what to say other than "I don't know I've just always wanted them" to this I reply " I don't know why you want them either." 
    People think because you don't want children your mean and don't like kids but that can not be further from the truth. I love my students and care for them. I spend more time with them than their parents do. I share in their accomplishments and are frustrated by their disappointments. I love them , I laugh with them and then they go home. 
  My whole day is spent with someone's child; their day is spent without them. I think they should not question my choices and appreciate the fact I happily share in their child's life.

I am happy with my puppies!


----------



## TKDisneylover

*Ms. Madd,*

Question for you, (I posted this on the Ghost Hunters thread but no one is home) anyway have you ever done ghost hunting in a cemetary?  I know we have talked about this type of thing before but could not remember if you had ventured into the cemetary.

DH bought a really nice voice recorder over the weekend and we have a fairly decent digital camera so we are thinking of venturing out to the really old cemetaries in our area to see what we can get.  I was wondering if you could give this first time ghost hunter some words of advice?


----------



## TKDisneylover

shaqie1 said:


> My whole day is spent with someone's child; their day is spent without them. I think they should not question my choices and appreciate the fact I happily share in their child's life.
> 
> I am happy with my puppies!



 

The parents of your students should definitely appreciate that they have someone as caring as you to teach and take care of their children during school hours!

Pets are so much easier to take care of, and you don't have to worry about sending them to college!


----------



## maddhatir

shaqie1 said:


> I too am from NJ and have chosen not to have children.



Welcome!!! 

I have MORE people NOW saying they are jealous of DH and I, that they love their kids- however if they had to do it all over again.......and that DH and I have made a wise choice! I love the way the tables are turning on us! I love it! 



TKDisneylover said:


> *Ms. Madd,*
> 
> Question for you, (I posted this on the Ghost Hunters thread but no one is home) anyway have you ever done ghost hunting in a cemetary?  I know we have talked about this type of thing before but could not remember if you had ventured into the cemetary.
> 
> DH bought a really nice voice recorder over the weekend and we have a fairly decent digital camera so we are thinking of venturing out to the really old cemetaries in our area to see what we can get.  I was wondering if you could give this first time ghost hunter some words of advice?



_MS TAMMY_! 

I have never investigated a cemetery- however, I would just snap away and keep your recorder going. I am sure you can't go wrong if you do that! 

Will you be doing this at night- I would think that would be the best time- during, dead time! And when do you plan on going?

I have read this word of advice- BE CAREFUL OF WHAT MAY BE LURKING IN THE CEMETERY- and I am not talking about spirits. Some weird crap happens in cemeteries at night- people do some strange things- so you might want to bring some mace just in case!

Let me know your plans!


----------



## KirklandTutu

Allright, so I was thinking of you all on our weekend vacation.  Why?  well, I tried the absinthe.  Nope, no green fairy.  It was, interesting...I prefer the lemonciello, though, or pisco...definetly pisco.

DH and I had a fabulous three day weekend in Portland.  It was our first time traveling by train.  It was a beautiful three and a half hour trip from Seattle.  We stayed at the Heathman...had lots and lots of fabulous food, and I had tons and tons of wonderful cocktails.  At the Heathman they had a very interesting Dill-iscious gin based drink.  V. v. refreshing with the dill, surprising, but refreshing.

I'm upset, though, all of the photos that I took were lost.  I didn't think that I erased the camera, but I guess I did.  Sad.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

KirklandTutu said:


> Allright, so I was thinking of you all on our weekend vacation.  Why?  well, I tried the absinthe.  Nope, no green fairy.  It was, interesting...I prefer the lemonciello, though, or pisco...definetly pisco.
> 
> DH and I had a fabulous three day weekend in Portland.  It was our first time traveling by train.  It was a beautiful three and a half hour trip from Seattle.  We stayed at the Heathman...had lots and lots of fabulous food, and I had tons and tons of wonderful cocktails.  At the Heathman they had a very interesting Dill-iscious gin based drink.  V. v. refreshing with the dill, surprising, but refreshing.
> 
> I'm upset, though, all of the photos that I took were lost.  I didn't think that I erased the camera, but I guess I did.  Sad.




hey I like lemoncello too!!! It's very tasty!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> _MS TAMMY_!
> 
> I have never investigated a cemetery- however, I would just snap away and keep your recorder going. I am sure you can't go wrong if you do that!
> 
> Will you be doing this at night- I would think that would be the best time- during, dead time! And when do you plan on going?
> 
> I have read this word of advice- BE CAREFUL OF WHAT MAY BE LURKING IN THE CEMETERY- and I am not talking about spirits. Some weird crap happens in cemeteries at night- people do some strange things- so you might want to bring some mace just in case!  Let me know your plans!



We will definitely be doing this at night, and I will try to get DH to do it during dead time, but I'm guessing he may not want to be out that early in the morning.  However, he did enjoy the new season episodes of Paranormal State last night, and you know how important dead time is to them, so he just may be game to go at that time.

We are shooting for this Friday or Saturday night, and yes, we will be very careful.  DH is a good sized dude so if we run into any freaks he'll take care of them!  The cemetary we are going to visit is small and very old and is not far from our home.  It's off a country road and is ungated so we're hoping for some good action!  And we will use a protection spell to keep any unwanted spirits from following us home.

I will keep everyone posted.


----------



## TKDisneylover

KirklandTutu said:


> Allright, so I was thinking of you all on our weekend vacation.  Why?  well, I tried the absinthe.  Nope, no green fairy.  It was, interesting...I prefer the lemonciello, though, or pisco...definetly pisco.



I've tried 3 different brands of absinthe and still have not seen the green fairy either.  But I do enjoy the flavor of it, especially after louching it.  That definitely takes the bite out of it.  I just love the smell of the anise and wormwood once it's louched, the scent fills the room.

I must say it's become my drink of choice, well except for Leinenkugels Summer Shandy beer with lemon.  I've gotten a little hooked on that this summer too.

Salute!


----------



## KirklandTutu

TKDisneylover said:


> I've tried 3 different brands of absinthe and still have not seen the green fairy either.  But I do enjoy the flavor of it, especially after louching it.  That definitely takes the bite out of it.  I just love the smell of the anise and wormwood once it's louched, the scent fills the room.
> 
> I must say it's become my drink of choice, well except for Leinenkugels Summer Shandy beer with lemon.  I've gotten a little hooked on that this summer too.
> 
> Salute!



It didn't seem to have much bite, imo.  DH thought it did, maybe I'm made of sterner stuff?  lol  
You might like one of the drinks they had.  It was basically an old fashioned, but the glass was 'rinsed' with absinthe, so it had the aroma and slight flavor, but not as in your face as the on the rocks version.

I had way to many cocktails this weekend.  Or not enough, depends on how you look at it.


----------



## TKDisneylover

KirklandTutu said:


> I had way to many cocktails this weekend.  Or not enough, depends on how you look at it.



 

I had forgotten to ask, what is pisco?


----------



## KirklandTutu

TKDisneylover said:


> I had forgotten to ask, what is pisco?



Pisco is the most politically entertaining liquor in the world.  Just read the discussion on wikipedia, you'll understand...just don't let a Peruvian or Chillian know that you're entertained  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pisco

It's made from fermented grapes, but tastes nothing like wine.  To me, there's a faint reminder of tequila scent/taste as you're drinking it, but not really.  

It's traditionally served as a pisco sour, which is difficult to find someone who makes a true pisco sour.  You almost have to find an Andean cuisine place in order to sample it.  Or find a friend from the region.

Cheesecake factory has a pineapple pisco sour, which isn't a pisco sour, but still tasty.  I also enjoy it as a shot, or sipped slowly.  The guys at the bar give the smile and nod when I order it.

Pisco makes me happy.


----------



## Dallasusa11

I am 25 and my wife is 27.  We dont really want kids either.


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> This weekend is my b-day and it is the one day DH can't so no to what I want to do I am choosing to go into the city (Philly) and take a historical walking tour.
> 
> We have been going into the city for about 25 years now, we have passed Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell 100s of times, and have taken them for granted b/c they are always there! I want to actually see them up close and personal. I want stories.
> 
> DH said fine- I think he has wanted to do it for some time now too.



So how was the birthday Madd?  Did you get into Philly for your tour?  Did you get cake?  And gifts?  And spoiled rotten on your special day?  




KirklandTutu said:


> DH and I had a fabulous three day weekend in Portland.  It was our first time traveling by train.  It was a beautiful three and a half hour trip from Seattle.


Traveling by train is sooo much nicer than air now days...  I realize it takes just as long as driving, but no security hassels, no extra charge for every suitcase, minimal delays, more leg room in the seats, it is cheaper, saves the wear/tear on your car, and you can just kick back, nap & enjoy the trip.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Dallasusa11 said:


> I am 25 and my wife is 27.  We dont really want kids either.


----------



## maddhatir

Dallasusa11 said:


> I am 25 and my wife is 27.  We dont really want kids either.



Welcome!



KirklandTutu said:


> Pisco is the most politically entertaining liquor in the world.  Just read the discussion on wikipedia, you'll understand...just don't let a Peruvian or Chillian know that you're entertained  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pisco



Thanks for the wiki site! I printed it out for DH- he loves to try new things!

BTW- I highly doubt anyone has seen the "green fairy" in this present day I think those that say they have- are fibbing or may have drank the whole bottle and would not remember what the heck they saw!  

I was out yardsaling a few weeks back- and a girl had an Absinthe set for sale. It was not the real thing- but we got to talking. She has never tried it- I told her I have a bottle and drink it sometimes. She kept saying how it will cause you to hallucinate etc and I was trying to tell her, no, not anymore- maybe long ago when it was not regulated- but I think it is more of a "myth". She INSISTED that it caused hallucinations and I just walked away- 

Whatever- she has never tried it, but she is the expert


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> So how was the birthday Madd?  Did you get into Philly for your tour?  Did you get cake?  And gifts?  And spoiled rotten on your special day?



 A storm started approaching about 3/4 of the way into the tour. The wind picked up, thunder, lightning- we made it back to the Visitors Center just in time for the downpour 

I wanted to go into Independence Hall, see the gardens, the cemeteries and do lunch at a Stephen Starr restaurant that was recommended to us by our tour guide! 

I told DH I need a b-day part 2! He felt so bad and agreed, so we will go back soon.

I never ask for anything for my b-day or on holidays, only b/c I get everything I want all year long Mom gave me some $$ so I am going to get myself an IPod- yes, I might be the only left on the earth without one!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> nope, neither DH nor I have one...I don't really have a need for an mp3 player right now and DH's boss gave him a cheap one that looks just like an IPOD mini, but isn't...so that works for him
> 
> sorry your tour got rained out!!!


----------



## KirklandTutu

zima-cheryl said:


> Traveling by train is sooo much nicer than air now days...  I realize it takes just as long as driving, but no security hassels, no extra charge for every suitcase, minimal delays, more leg room in the seats, it is cheaper, saves the wear/tear on your car, and you can just kick back, nap & enjoy the trip.



I'm trying to convice DH to take the Coast Starlight down to Disneyland.  He keeps coming up with reasons not to.  First it was the lack of a personal toilet...then I showed him that some sleepers do have them.  Then he said it would take away from the time spent in Disneyland.  I think he's full of it.



maddhatir said:


> I was out yardsaling a few weeks back- and a girl had an Absinthe set for sale. It was not the real thing- but we got to talking.



Ok, this reminded me of a question I have, and this crew might be the ones to answer it.  We have a set of glasses that came with a bar that we got at a second hand store.  They are about 3 inches tall and look a bit like an hour glass...pinched in the middle with a balloon bottom and top.  Any ideas what it's for?


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> Ok, this reminded me of a question I have, and this crew might be the ones to answer it.  We have a set of glasses that came with a bar that we got at a second hand store.  They are about 3 inches tall and look a bit like an hour glass...pinched in the middle with a balloon bottom and top.  Any ideas what it's for?



I did a Google image search and is this what they look like?? Sorry the image is so large.


----------



## maddhatir

and on to another "mind altering note" can you only imagine if this happened!????  


http://blog.norml.org/2008/07/29/no...to-urge-ending-federal-marijuana-prohibition/

*Members of Congress Demand An End To Pot Possession Arrests *

Wednesday, July 30, 2008: At a press conference held this morning, members of Congress called on their fellow lawmakers to remove all federal penalties that criminalize the possession and use of marijuana by adults. 

“To those who say that the government should not be encouraging the smoking of marijuana, my response is that I completely agree,” said Representative Barney Frank (D-MA). “But it is a great mistake to divide all human activity into two categories: those that are criminally prohibited, and those that are encouraged. In a free society, there must be a very considerable zone of activity between those two poles in which people are allowed to make their own choices as long as they are not impinging on the rights, freedom, or property of others. I believe … criminalizing choices that adults make because we think they are unwise ones, when the choices involved have no negative effect on the rights of others, is not appropriate in a free society.”

Rep. Frank, along with co-sponsors Rep. Barbara Lee (D-CA) and Lacy Clay (D-MO), urged lawmakers to support HR 5843, An Act To Remove Federal Penalties for the Personal Use of Marijuana by Responsible Adults, which would eliminate federal penalties for possession of up to 100 grams of marijuana, and for the not-for-profit transfer of up to one ounce of marijuana. Other co-sponsors of the measure include Rep. Tammy Baldwin (D-WI); Rep. Earl Blumenauer (D-OR); Rep. Zoe Lofgren (D-CA); Rep. Jim McDermott (D-WA) and Rep. Ron Paul (R-TX).

This proposal reflects the basic recommendations of the National Commission on Marijuana and Drug Abuse (aka the Shafer Commission) in its groundbreaking report to Congress in 1972 titled Marihuana: A Signal of Misunderstanding.

“There is absolutely nothing wrong with the responsible use of marijuana by adults and this should be of no interest or concern to the government,” said NORML Executive Director Allen St. Pierre. “It makes no sense to continue to treat nearly half of all Americans as criminals. “

“I am a 43-year-old man, a graduate of the University of Massachusetts, I pay my taxes and, like millions of other Americans, I occasionally smoke marijuana. I cannot for the life of me understand why anyone would wish to treat me like a criminal, based on my responsible use of marijuana. It is time we stopped arresting responsible marijuana smokers, and HR 5843 would do that under federal law.”

This is the first federal marijuana decriminalization bill to be introduced in Congress since 1978, and reflects the changing public attitudes that no longer support treating responsible marijuana smokers like criminals. According to a nationwide Time/CNN poll, three out of four Americans now favor a fine only, and no jail, for adults who possess or use small amounts of marijuana.

Each year in this country we arrest more and more of our citizens on marijuana charges. In 2006, the last year for which the data are available, we arrested 830,000 Americans on marijuana charges, and 88 percent of those arrests were for personal possession and use, not trafficking. They were otherwise law-abiding citizens who smoke marijuana.

Since 1965, a total of nearly 20 million Americans - predominantly young people under the age of 30 -- have been arrested on marijuana charges; more than 11 million marijuana arrests just since 1990. 

Currently 47 percent of all drug arrests in this country are for marijuana, and another marijuana smoker is arrested every 38 seconds. Police arrest more people on marijuana charges each year than the total number of arrestees for all violent crimes combined, including murder, rape, robbery and aggravated assault.

As President Jimmy Carter said in a message to Congress in 1977, “Penalties against drug use should not be more damaging to the individual than the use of the drug itself. Nowhere is this more clear than in the laws against the possession of marijuana in private for personal use.”


----------



## BamaTigger

I havent read this whole thread, but the topic SCREAMED my name! Been married since 92, and Im 35 yrs old and me and DH do not have kids (our 4 furbabies are our kids). Back in 01 I got pregnant and lost it at 3 months. I was taking care of my disabled parents for the last 7 years and I think the miscarriage happened for a reason....of course I was ECSTATIC when I found out I was pregnant, and of course I was DEVASTATED when I lost it....fast forwarding to now...well last year I unexpectedly and suddenly lost my dad (we were EXTREMELY close) and now I am at a point in my life where it is just me and my hubby and our 4 animals and I am at peace. I dont want children now. I guess after caring for my dad and step mom for 7 years, it is time to me and DH. Selfish? Some may think so. But I dont care. Why I like NOT having kids? I like being able to get up and go when i want! I like the quietness in my home. I love going to WDW without kids ( I see the stuff parents go thru with kids....the aggravating stuff, and oh boy...). I just love the life me and my DH have with out kids. My step mom is in a nursing home (she had a brain aneurysm in 2000 and is incompetent-and BTW--my dad passed away from the SAME THING--ironic isnt it). Anyway, back to the nursing home....I go in there and it is HEARTBREAKING to see all those people in there and I wonder if me and DH will be in there one day because we have no one to take care of us when we get old.....BUT that is no reason to have a child....I wouldnt want me to be a burden to my son or daughter if I had one anyway. So alot goes thru my mind about NOT having kids, rather than HAVING kids.

Im perfectly happy without kids. And to all the other couples who dont want any....YAY FOR YA'LL!!!  

And for what its worth.....GREAT TOPIC! Its nice to vent to non kid adults...all my friends have kids and they act like Im the worst person in the world for not wanting any!


----------



## maddhatir

BamaTigger said:


> I havent read this whole thread, but the topic SCREAMED my name! Been married since 92, and Im 35 yrs old and me and DH do not have kids (our 4 furbabies are our kids). Back in 01 I got pregnant and lost it at 3 months. I was taking care of my disabled parents for the last 7 years and I think the miscarriage happened for a reason....of course I was ECSTATIC when I found out I was pregnant, and of course I was DEVASTATED when I lost it....fast forwarding to now...well last year I unexpectedly and suddenly lost my dad (we were EXTREMELY close) and now I am at a point in my life where it is just me and my hubby and our 4 animals and I am at peace. I dont want children now. I guess after caring for my dad and step mom for 7 years, it is time to me and DH. Selfish? Some may think so. But I dont care. Why I like NOT having kids? I like being able to get up and go when i want! I like the quietness in my home. I love going to WDW without kids ( I see the stuff parents go thru with kids....the aggravating stuff, and oh boy...). I just love the life me and my DH have with out kids. My step mom is in a nursing home (she had a brain aneurysm in 2000 and is incompetent-and BTW--my dad passed away from the SAME THING--ironic isnt it). Anyway, back to the nursing home....I go in there and it is HEARTBREAKING to see all those people in there and I wonder if me and DH will be in there one day because we have no one to take care of us when we get old.....BUT that is no reason to have a child....I wouldnt want me to be a burden to my son or daughter if I had one anyway. So alot goes thru my mind about NOT having kids, rather than HAVING kids.
> 
> Im perfectly happy without kids. And to all the other couples who dont want any....YAY FOR YA'LL!!!
> 
> And for what its worth.....GREAT TOPIC! Its nice to vent to non kid adults...*all my friends have kids and they act like Im the worst person in the world for not wanting any*!



Welcome!

I am sorry about your father and your miscarriage 

And as I stated before- most of my friends now, say how jealous they are of us and that we made the right choice. Hopefully your friends will come around! 

To me, it just seems like kids are just too much aggravation. I love my nieces and nephews, but, I like it when mom and dad are around to control the situation. I like to just step back when things get to dramatic

I told DH a long time ago (and he agrees 100%) there is NO way I want to share you with anyone- nor, do I want to have anyone take my focus away from him. I feel I would resent a child for that reason. We can be together 24/7 and not get sick of each other- It seems to me, that a lot of couple's relationships change when they have kids- and it never looks like it is for the better! You can see them in public and they look aggravated and just not happy. It looks ........._sad_........ 

They probably think no one notices- but you can see it!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> I told DH a long time ago (and he agrees 100%) there is NO way I want to share you with anyone- nor, do I want to have anyone take my focus away from him. I feel I would resent a child for that reason. We can be together 24/7 and not get sick of each other- It seems to me, that a lot of couple's relationships change when they have kids- and it never looks like it is for the better! You can see them in public and they look aggravated and just not happy. It looks ........._sad_........
> 
> They probably think no one notices- but you can see it!



DH and I always feel this way too...We really are able to spend all that time together and not get sick of each other and I never wanted/want a kid to take away from that...I too have seen too many couples changed when they have kids and it just seems like that spark is lost between them and they are no longer a couple but just mommy and daddy...that just doesn't seem like a good life to me...


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> DH and I always feel this way too...We really are able to spend all that time together and not get sick of each other and I never wanted/want a kid to take away from that...I too have seen too many couples changed when they have kids and it just seems like that spark is lost between them and they are no longer a couple but just mommy and daddy...that just doesn't seem like a good life to me...



ugh- I was watching Super Nanny one night and the husband and wife called each other mommy and daddy.  .............creepy!

Needless to say- Jo was NOT too happy about that and told them to put a stop to it!


----------



## BamaTigger

maddhatir said:


> Welcome!
> 
> I am sorry about your father and your miscarriage
> 
> And as I stated before- most of my friends now, say how jealous they are of us and that we made the right choice. Hopefully your friends will come around!
> 
> To me, it just seems like kids are just too much aggravation. I love my nieces and nephews, but, I like it when mom and dad are around to control the situation. I like to just step back when things get to dramatic
> 
> I told DH a long time ago (and he agrees 100%) there is NO way I want to share you with anyone- nor, do I want to have anyone take my focus away from him. I feel I would resent a child for that reason. We can be together 24/7 and not get sick of each other- It seems to me, that a lot of couple's relationships change when they have kids- and it never looks like it is for the better! You can see them in public and they look aggravated and just not happy. It looks ........._sad_........
> 
> They probably think no one notices- but you can see it!




Thanks for the welcome and the condolences! 

I agree with you about the kid thing...my DH is the  type that loves  100% attention TO him, and I know he is not the "selfish" type, but I have always thought that he wouldnt like the attention  given to a child--or as much as I would have to give one. 

But that is fine with me! I too think kids are aggravating..the school stuff, the activities....ech....Im just not too in love with the "soccer mom" thing.  
We have boats, cars, motorcycles, and a nice home and we get to go alot (depending on work), and all my "friends" dont understand how we afford it, especially going to WDW 5-6 x a year, and well...WE DONT HAVE KIDS! I like spending money on ME, DH, MY ANIMALS, AND MY HOME..... I dont see why they should care where my money goes!! Jealous I think....


----------



## maddhatir

BamaTigger said:


> But that is fine with me! I too think kids are aggravating..the school stuff, the activities....ech....Im just not too in love with the "soccer mom" thing.



 A friend of mine is pregnant for the first time. I said to her "you KNOW? you will soon have to become part of the "play date" scene?" She just got this sad expression on her face and said "but I don't wannnaaaaaa" 

I said "too bad- I think it is a requirement, you have to hang out with all the other mommies" 

She also said she will be a paranoid mom- running after the kid to put on her helmet and knee pads when she rides a bike. She said she will keep her inside to read books. I said, "yeah- you will probably put a helmet on her for that too"  Of course, this conversation was all in fun!


----------



## KirklandTutu

maddhatir said:


> I did a Google image search and is this what they look like?? Sorry the image is so large.



Nope, that's not it, I'll take a picture later and put it on.


----------



## EJKorvette

I saw this thread and had to weigh in, but can't read through all of the posts here at weekday work. Besides, I probably read it all before years ago on alt.fan.child-free, or whatever that newsgroup is called.

I am a fifty-one year old divorced man. I did the Dad thing backwards - back in 1983 I met a woman with three girls from her first marriage. We got married in 1984, and I adopted them in 1986. I left my exwife in 1991, and divorced her in '95 or '96.

My current girlfriend is sixty, has never had nor wanted kids. (She has six cats and two dogs now though).

We love driving up to the World when we can. We are fully aware that we will be surrounded by kids almost anywhere up at Disney. Even when enjoying the more adult attractions to be found at EPCOT.

Luckily no one asks us about kids! And my mom has given up on me remarrying and providing her grandchildren with my genes. (Luckily my brothers already gave her five grandchildren).

As for absinthe - 

I have been intrigued by absinthe ever since I read about it in the Scientific American magazine article years ago.

I have tried to make a version of my own by soaking wormwood in hundred-proof vodka. I used to be in the SCA. I brought some of this to several Kingdom events, which resulted in "fairy puke" (the name a friend of mine gave it) being banned from the Kingdom. Any subjects of Trimaris reading this may remember "The Ballad of Imre the Evil".

I have mail-ordered Hill's and Logan-Fils from the Czech Republic. Don't know if I saw any green fairies, but I do know that it messed me up big-time.

Several years ago Saveur had an article about pastis, and mentioned a brand from California that came with an absinthe spoon tied to the bottle. I still use that spoon on the rare occasions I open my bottle of Logan-Fils.

I am looking forward to the stuff that the Wired article talked about, Tim (?) Breaux' brew that is on sale now.

btw loved the scene in Moulin Rouge with La Fée Verte (who looked very similar to a pixie we all know and love very well).


----------



## Barthy73

Here's one off my list of annoying things about kids (and their parents).  Many items on my list have been shared many times in this forum.

I can't even rank these, but here goes:

#xxx annoying thing about kids:  Using them as an excuse to miss a scheduled event!

My DW had a very well attended Pampered Chef party this week.  21 of the 24 people who committed showed up.  The 3 who didn't magically had sick kids.  Do they bother to call and let us know ahead of time?  NO, of course not.  If you're going to commit to something, do it, or don't do it, or have the courtesy to call.  After the fact, "I'm sorry, my child was sick" is a very old, very overused excuse.  It's almost as bad to me as, "My dog ate my homework."

Sorry, back to your reqularly schedule program now.

:::Steps Off Soap Box:::


BTW, hope you had a nice BD, Madd, sorry to hear it got rained out.  :-(


----------



## maddhatir

EJKorvette said:


> I saw this thread and had to weigh in, but can't read through all of the posts here at weekday work. Besides, I probably read it all before years ago on alt.fan.child-free, or whatever that newsgroup is called.



Welcome!!!



Barthy73 said:


> *Here's one off my list of annoying things about kids (and their parents).  Many items on my list have been shared many times in this forum.*
> I can't even rank these, but here goes:
> 
> #xxx annoying thing about kids:  Using them as an excuse to miss a scheduled event!
> 
> My DW had a very well attended Pampered Chef party this week.  21 of the 24 people who committed showed up.  The 3 who didn't magically had sick kids.  Do they bother to call and let us know ahead of time?  NO, of course not.  If you're going to commit to something, do it, or don't do it, or have the courtesy to call.  After the fact, "I'm sorry, my child was sick" is a very old, very overused excuse.  It's almost as bad to me as, "My dog ate my homework."
> 
> Sorry, back to your reqularly schedule program now.
> 
> :::Steps Off Soap Box:::
> 
> 
> BTW, hope you had a nice BD, Madd, sorry to hear it got rained out.  :-(




Thanks for the B-day wish! 

.....did you have a bad day today and needed to vent!?


----------



## PhotobearSam

Here at our Cottage business, people send their kids to the office for matches all the time...I can't legally give matches to anyone under 16 yrs old...Do not scream at me because you were too lazy to walk to the office yourself. I do not hand matches to CHILDREN...


Rant over.


----------



## KirklandTutu

Ok, so who knows what this is?


----------



## zima-cheryl

BamaTigger said:


> .... now I am at a point in my life where it is just me and my hubby and our 4 animals and I am at peace.



You know BamaTigger, that really is the thing.  

I find keeping myself centered & peaceful is a full time job for me (w/a lot of help from DH).  I don't know that I could have a kid and still be a balanced enough human to not loose it. 

I certainly wouldn't be happy, much less yet at peace w/myself & my life.  And I'm sure the child would be miserable & turn out to be a neurotic adult who would rightfully blame everything on the mother.  Of course that is assuming DSS didn't show up & take the kid from me.  And DH would probably be long gone if not physically... at least mentally checked out from the whole scene.  

Maybe I just don't have a strong enough spirit, personality, sense of self, whatever... to be able to care for myself _and _another person.  
But I'd rather admit that & have a happy life than make the mistake of having kids & ruining not just my life... but probably theirs too.


----------



## PoohNTuck

Forgive me friends, it's been 2 weeks since my last post...

I've been busy making money with 50+hr weeks.  Cue the music "money, money, money, money.... mo-ney...".  And spending way too much money on DH's tuition for a class he couldn't finish because 7 credits was too many (6 was manageable last semester but 7...  ) Cue the music "money, money, money..." ah well, you get it.

Ok, so I love coke.  And if absinthe is licorice flavored and you temper it with coke.  What would you say if I said "Ouzo"???  I find ouzo to be licorice flavored.  And I once mixed several shots of it in with a root beer and drank it like soda.  I can still stay, cant I?  Considering you guys chase your absinthe with coke????  Anybody else had/like ouzo (greek stuff)???

MADD, happy belated   Sorry I missed it.

Alright back to making money this weekend (no cue for the music- it's just regular straight pay folks, no overtime to get excited about here)


----------



## PoohNTuck

Kirkland,

Isn't that a red wine decanter to optimize the flavor of young reds?


----------



## TKDisneylover

KirklandTutu said:


> Pisco is the most politically entertaining liquor in the world.  Just read the discussion on wikipedia, you'll understand...just don't let a Peruvian or Chillian know that you're entertained  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pisco
> 
> It's made from fermented grapes, but tastes nothing like wine.  To me, there's a faint reminder of tequila scent/taste as you're drinking it, but not really.
> 
> Pisco makes me happy.



Thanks for the info!  When I saw the word "tequila" it really sparked my interest.  DH & I consider ourselves tequila connoisseurs as we have tried about 50 different kinds ranging in price from $4 - $65 a shot.  But we actually drink it out of snifters versus doing the traditional shot with salt & lime.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Dallasusa11 said:


> I am 25 and my wife is 27.  We dont really want kids either.



 



BamaTigger said:


> I havent read this whole thread, but the topic SCREAMED my name! Been married since 92, and Im 35 yrs old and me and DH do not have kids (our 4 furbabies are our kids). Back in 01 I got pregnant and lost it at 3 months. I was taking care of my disabled parents for the last 7 years and I think the miscarriage happened for a reason....
> 
> Im perfectly happy without kids. And to all the other couples who dont want any....YAY FOR YA'LL!!!
> 
> And for what its worth.....GREAT TOPIC! Its nice to vent to non kid adults...all my friends have kids and they act like Im the worst person in the world for not wanting any!



 

Sorry to hear about the miscarriage and the health struggles with your family.  It is hard taking care of the elderly and I agree with you about not wanting ourselves to be a burden to someone else.  DH and I always joke that when our times comes we will just take a cruise and jump ship together. 

It always amazes me that people think we are so terrible for not having kids!  Are we not making an adult decision or what?!


----------



## KirklandTutu

PoohNTuck said:


> Kirkland,
> 
> Isn't that a red wine decanter to optimize the flavor of young reds?



No, it's the size of a shot glass.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> and on to another "mind altering note" can you only imagine if this happened!????



  

Madd, Sorry to hear your b-day got rained out.  But I can tell you that you will enjoy your new iPod, I LOVE mine.  We take it on trips all the time.  We have a docking station for it that has speakers that we take on vacation to enjoy our own tunes in our hotel/resort room.



maddhatir said:


> I told DH a long time ago (and he agrees 100%) there is NO way I want to share you with anyone- nor, do I want to have anyone take my focus away from him. I feel I would resent a child for that reason. We can be together 24/7 and not get sick of each other- It seems to me, that a lot of couple's relationships change when they have kids- and it never looks like it is for the better! You can see them in public and they look aggravated and just not happy. It looks ........._sad_........
> 
> They probably think no one notices- but you can see it!





Shyvioletisme said:


> DH and I always feel this way too...We really are able to spend all that time together and not get sick of each other and I never wanted/want a kid to take away from that...I too have seen too many couples changed when they have kids and it just seems like that spark is lost between them and they are no longer a couple but just mommy and daddy...that just doesn't seem like a good life to me...



This is DH & I totally.  We can spend tons of time together and never get sick of each other, not to mention we actually prefer it that way most of the time.  We love vacationing by our selves too even though being at home is like a vacation also.  We just enjoy each other's company that much.

Last night we went out with some of my co-workers/friends to a local mexican restaurant that has a great outdoor patio and a live mariachi band playing all night long.  It was a celebration for a co-workers birthday and we were also celebrating our 21st wedding anniversary.  One of my co-workers who is male, single & 40 asked what our secret was?  People seem to ask that alot lately.   Anyway, I typically say because we are just so connected in wanting the same things in life, but that I also think it has a lot to do with the fact that we don't have kids.  He said he was asking because he has friends (2 married couples), whose kids are reaching their teen years and they are both having marital problems.  He agreed that these days it seems as though children have become big stressors in a relationship.  He counsel's many families whose kids have gotten into trouble with the law and at the same time the parents are on the brink of divorce.

Truly sad....


----------



## TKDisneylover

EJKorvette said:


> I saw this thread and had to weigh in, but can't read through all of the posts here at weekday work. Besides, I probably read it all before years ago on alt.fan.child-free, or whatever that newsgroup is called.
> 
> As for absinthe -
> 
> I have been intrigued by absinthe ever since I read about it in the Scientific American magazine article years ago.
> 
> I have tried to make a version of my own by soaking wormwood in hundred-proof vodka. I used to be in the SCA. I brought some of this to several Kingdom events, which resulted in "fairy puke" (the name a friend of mine gave it) being banned from the Kingdom. Any subjects of Trimaris reading this may remember "The Ballad of Imre the Evil".



 

I recently came across a recipe for Absinthe in an herb gardening book I have.  I was considering trying this recipe, but your "fairy puke" is scaring me!


----------



## BamaTigger

TKDisneylover said:


> Sorry to hear about the miscarriage and the health struggles with your family.  It is hard taking care of the elderly and I agree with you about not wanting ourselves to be a burden to someone else.  DH and I always joke that when our times comes we will just take a cruise and jump ship together.
> 
> It always amazes me that people think we are so terrible for not having kids!  Are we not making an adult decision or what?!




Thank you!

 lol @ JUMPING THE CRUISE SHIP! 2 funny   ! We are leaving our life insurance to our 4 animals when our time comes!


----------



## ThreeMusketeers

IGNORANCE is BLISS 





TKDisneylover said:


> Madd, Sorry to hear your b-day got rained out.  But I can tell you that you will enjoy your new iPod, I LOVE mine.  We take it on trips all the time.  We have a docking station for it that has speakers that we take on vacation to enjoy our own tunes in our hotel/resort room.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> This is DH & I totally.  We can spend tons of time together and never get sick of each other, not to mention we actually prefer it that way most of the time.  We love vacationing by our selves too even though being at home is like a vacation also.  We just enjoy each other's company that much.
> 
> Last night we went out with some of my co-workers/friends to a local mexican restaurant that has a great outdoor patio and a live mariachi band playing all night long.  It was a celebration for a co-workers birthday and we were also celebrating our 21st wedding anniversary.  One of my co-workers who is male, single & 40 asked what our secret was?  People seem to ask that alot lately.   Anyway, I typically say because we are just so connected in wanting the same things in life, but that I also think it has a lot to do with the fact that we don't have kids.  He said he was asking because he has friends (2 married couples), whose kids are reaching their teen years and they are both having marital problems.  He agreed that these days it seems as though children have become big stressors in a relationship.  He counsel's many families whose kids have gotten into trouble with the law and at the same time the parents are on the brink of divorce.
> 
> Truly sad....


----------



## maddhatir

Happy Monday CF peoples!! 

How was everyone's weekend?.... peaceful I am sure!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Happy Monday everyone!  Are you all rested after your child-free weekend, coming and going as you please, relaxing to sounds of ...... silence!

We had a great weekend, Saturday we helped my mom move into a new apartment and then spent the evening relaxing on our deck and enjoyed a *quiet* summer evening.

Then yesterday we just relaxed the entire day on the deck, read the newspaper, then read a book, all while enjoying a Leinenkugel's Summer Shandy and the beautiful summer weather......in silence.  Ahhhh, the sounds of the birds chirping, the squirrels playing and the turkey waddling through to enjoy our peaceful yard.

Hope you all had a great weekend too!


----------



## maddhatir

Yesterday we were down the shore. We get on DH's boat to go sialing, and the motor would not start It is BRAND NEW!-

So nix the sailing. My SIL asked me if I wanted to go to the pool while DH tinkered with the motor- I told her I did not really feel like it- In so many words- I told her I did not feel like hearing the kids screaming! To me, it is like nails on a chalkboard. My wholy body tenses up at the sound of it! 

I know the kids like the pool- so I just stay away


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> Happy Monday CF peoples!!
> 
> How was everyone's weekend?.... peaceful I am sure!!



We had a great weekend... despite some heavy rain showers.  Saturday after a nice long nap   we got dressed up and went out to supper at a fancy restaurant, then caught a show ... "All's Well That Ends Well".

I know... I know... but I just *love *Shakespeare!
Really... once you pick up the jist of the language & what is really going on... some of the stuff is pretty bawdy and crude.  It was a pretty good show!  

Sunday after church & errands I "worked" in the yard the rest of the day.  I did get some flowers planted, a new soaker hose down & some weeding & trimming done.  Of course that work also involved a heavy dose of inspecting the hammock!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

weekend was good, but HOT...it was between 105-107 here on saturday and sunday!! so hubby and I stayed indoors much of the time...
took a little trip up to Ikea(which is about 30 minutes away), bought some cute bath stuff. and some new storage units...

Spent most of the weekend reading a book!!! ahh. relaxation!!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> We had a great weekend... despite some heavy rain showers.  Saturday after a nice long nap   we got dressed up and went out to supper at a fancy restaurant, then caught a show ... "All's Well That Ends Well".
> 
> I know... I know... but I just *love *Shakespeare!
> Really... once you pick up the jist of the language & what is really going on... some of the stuff is pretty bawdy and crude.  It was a pretty good show!
> 
> Sunday after church & errands I "worked" in the yard the rest of the day.  I did get some flowers planted, a new soaker hose down & some weeding & trimming done.  Of course that work also involved a heavy dose of inspecting the hammock!




I still have some rose bushes to plant- 6 of them!! 

I went to the garden center and they had 50% off on all of their rose bushes- I can not pass up that! So I got 2 Peace and 2 Princess De Monacos- I also got 2 Lemon Drop tea roses. They are trained to grow, not as a bush, but it looks like a long trunk with a little ball on top. 

And this is way cool........the girl I buy my plants from said her boss told her to TRASH all of the annuals that were left there! She said she can't just trash them, so she told me and mom to take whatever we wanted! I got 3 large trays of annuals.  FREE!


----------



## KirklandTutu

This weekend, we did nothing!
lol
I just felt like saying that.

Actually we went to see a performance directed by a friend of mine, combining fire dancing with contemporary dance.  I've been using my time off this summer to help out with it, and it was great to see it all come together on stage.  

But other than that, we did absolutly nothing this weekend.

It was bliss.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Yesterday we were down the shore. We get on DH's boat to go sialing, and the motor would not start It is BRAND NEW!-



Did you DH ever figure out what was wrong with the motor?



> I told her I did not feel like hearing the kids screaming! To me, it is like nails on a chalkboard. My wholy body tenses up at the sound of it! I know the kids like the pool- so I just stay away.



Ah yes, nails on a chalkboard, that's a perfect way to describe the screaming!


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> Of course that work also involved a heavy dose of inspecting the hammock!



I would love to have a hammock on our new deck!



Shyvioletisme said:


> weekend was good, but HOT...it was between 105-107 here on saturday and sunday!! so hubby and I stayed indoors much of the time...



   Now that's HOT!!



maddhatir said:


> And this is way cool........the girl I buy my plants from said her boss told her to TRASH all of the annuals that were left there! She said she can't just trash them, so she told me and mom to take whatever we wanted! I got 3 large trays of annuals.  FREE!



What a great deal, good for you! 



KirklandTutu said:


> But other than that, we did absolutly nothing this weekend.
> 
> It was bliss.



 BLISS, BLISS, BLISS, BLISS, BLISS......


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Did you DH ever figure out what was wrong with the motor?



WELL! as he was investigating- he DROPPED THE OIL CAP INTO THE WATER! It was gone! We all just kind of looked over the side.  The bay is yucky and *I* was not going to look for it. 

I was peeing b/c my SIL is all cha-cha. She has on her matching outfit- her cha-cha rhinestone studded glasses, her dangling earrings, she looks at us and says- I *would* go in and get it but the water looks gross  She wasn't going anywhere DH wasn't even going in for it-

He could not continue without the cap on- actually he just tracked one down and I just ordered another cap online. It was the only place he could find one! 

He is crossing his fingers it gets here before the weekend.

So Tammy- when is your cemetery investigation??! 

I told DH- I want to check out some cemeteries down the shore at night- we do not do much at night anyway when we are down there! Just hang out. He is not too keen on the idea- but if I whine enough, he may go for it


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I was peeing b/c my SIL is all cha-cha. She has on her matching outfit- her cha-cha rhinestone studded glasses, her dangling earrings, she looks at us and says- I *would* go in and get it but the water looks gross  She wasn't going anywhere DH wasn't even going in for it-



The being all cha-cha makes me laugh .  My best friend and I always say that after our DH's croke (cuz guys always go first! ), that you will see us driving around in our convertible with white rimmed sunglasses, and dangly ball earrings (think an old Carol Burnett character snapping her gum)!  The description of your SIL brought that picture into my head, anyway....



> So Tammy- when is your cemetery investigation??!
> 
> I told DH- I want to check out some cemeteries down the shore at night- we do not do much at night anyway when we are down there! Just hang out. He is not too keen on the idea- but if I whine enough, he may go for it



We were going to head out this past Friday or Saturday night, but we had to move my mother into a new apartment.  We cleaned the new place Friday night and moved her all day Saturday, needless to say we were WIPED OUT!!  So the plan is to try again this weekend.  I will be sure to send you mist & orb pics immediately!  Maybe I'll throw in a few apparitions too!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> I still have some rose bushes to plant- 6 of them!!
> 
> I went to the garden center and they had 50% off on all of their rose bushes- I can not pass up that! So I got 2 Peace and 2 Princess De Monacos- I also got 2 Lemon Drop tea roses. They are trained to grow, not as a bush, but it looks like a long trunk with a little ball on top.
> 
> And this is way cool........the girl I buy my plants from said her boss told her to TRASH all of the annuals that were left there! She said she can't just trash them, so she told me and mom to take whatever we wanted! I got 3 large trays of annuals.  FREE!




The lemon drops must be just _beautiful_!   

And what a deal on the annuals!!!  I know you can always get them on the cheap this time of year... but free is my favorite price.  And there is always room for them somewhere!


----------



## PhotobearSam

I can't believe what I am about to type but I actually had a pretty BLISSFUL weekend...even though we worked 12 to 15 hrs a day 7 days a week right now, I had an awesome weekend.


DH is off from work due to a cellulitis infection. He is hooked up to a 24 hr a day IV bag with a pump. He carries it around 24/7. We had horrible rain, it's cold and the tourists are complaining but I still managed to have a good weekend.

DH and I got to work together. He was a lot of help. We giggled a lot. Had a lot of laughs, spend time together and realized it was exactly as it should be.

I knew my DH was the one for me when we left Columbia SC, and did not even turn the car radio on till we got to Mass......We just like each other...It's the basis for everything.

None of this would have been possible with children,
BLISS BLISS BLISS


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> DH is off from work due to a cellulitis infection. He is hooked up to a 24 hr a day IV bag with a pump. He carries it around 24/7.



OOOO- Sam! I hope your DH is feeling better soon!

How long will he be on the pump- see! if you had kids- THEY can take care of him......get the kids primed for when he gets old and can't get around .......


----------



## TKDisneylover

PhotobearSam said:


> I can't believe what I am about to type but I actually had a pretty BLISSFUL weekend...even though we worked 12 to 15 hrs a day 7 days a week right now, I had an awesome weekend.
> 
> 
> DH is off from work due to a cellulitis infection. He is hooked up to a 24 hr a day IV bag with a pump. He carries it around 24/7. We had horrible rain, it's cold and the tourists are complaining but I still managed to have a good weekend.
> 
> DH and I got to work together. He was a lot of help. We giggled a lot. Had a lot of laughs, spend time together and realized it was exactly as it should be.
> 
> I knew my DH was the one for me when we left Columbia SC, and did not even turn the car radio on till we got to Mass......We just like each other...It's the basis for everything.
> 
> None of this would have been possible with children,
> BLISS BLISS BLISS



Sorry to hear about your DH's cellulitis infection.  How long does it take for something like that to clear up?  Regardless of the illness you were really able to enjoy each other's company and make light of the long days!  I could not imagine dealing with that combined and then having to chase around kids, UGH!!   THANK GOODNESS YOU DON'T HAVE ANY!! 

I'm noticing a pattern on this board, no kids makes for happy couples.  And not just happy, but connected and loving the time that we spend with our significant other's.  That truly is a blissful existence for everyone!


----------



## KirklandTutu

So, I'm on vacation
and DH is out of town this week on business


...I'm tempted to hop a flight down to Disneyland for a day


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> So, I'm on vacation
> and DH is out of town this week on business
> 
> 
> ...I'm tempted to hop a flight down to Disneyland for a day



GO FOR IT! 

But how do the airfares look???


----------



## CJK

Hi all!  It's been a looooong time since I've posted on this thread so I'm sure no one remembers me from back in the day!  I haven't had the chance to read a lot of this thread, but I plan to do that very soon.  Hope everyone is doing well!

I was wondering if any of you have had to deal with this situation, and if so, how do you deal with it?????  July was a busy month for me with lots of summer visiting with friends.  We're all in our mid 30's and are busy having children.  Well, everyone but me that is.....  ALL of my get togethers have included children (kids ages range from 6 to newborn, and many of my friends are pregnant or trying to get pregnant).  I actually have a bond with many of these kids so I found myself playing with the kids a lot, giving the parents a break.  I like that to a point, but then I missed out on what little adult conversation there actually was...  I love my friends dearly, but honestly......I was sooooo tired of having to clean up after kids, entertain them and much of the conversations revolved around kids too.  I don't blame my friends for that since it's natural and I'd be worried if it wasn't that way to a point.  I have no problem with that really, especially since I genuinely do enjoy children.

Yet, I found myself feeling a real sense of loss.  I was longing for the get togethers of the past where we'd all laugh and joke, go out together, travel, etc...  On one particular get together, it consisted of 4 friends and 6 children all under the age of 3.  I left feeling tired, exhausted and embarrassingly, I cried as soon as I was out of sight of the house.  We have so little in common these days.  Maybe it will change as the kids get older, I'm not sure.  I've considered joining groups of fellow-minded people as well.  That may help, but I can't help but feel like I'm in mourning for my old friends.  Does that make me selfish?

I'm curious to hear what others think about this situation.  Thanks so much.


----------



## maddhatir

CJK said:


> Hi all!  It's been a looooong time since I've posted on this thread so I'm sure no one remembers me from back in the day!  I haven't had the chance to read a lot of this thread, but I plan to do that very soon.  Hope everyone is doing well!



Welcome back!

I know what you mean- I often wonder sometimes after I leave a _get together_, why did I even _get together_!? 

However- As I am walking out and getting into my nice quiet car all I think is,  THANK GOODNESS I am leaving alone! 

My SIL talks about all of her playdates and all I can think of is....ugh......sounds exhausting and loud to me! 

I am lucky to have a few friends who's children are now teens and they can actually go out for an adult night out! The time will come when your friends will become _part of the living_ again! You are certainly not selfish to wish you can have your good friends back in your life!


----------



## zima-cheryl

CJK said:


> Hi all!  It's been a looooong time since I've posted on this thread so I'm sure no one remembers me from back in the day!  I haven't had the chance to read a lot of this thread, but I plan to do that very soon.  Hope everyone is doing well!
> 
> I was wondering if any of you have had to deal with this situation, and if so, how do you deal with it?????  July was a busy month for me with lots of summer visiting with friends.  We're all in our mid 30's and are busy having children.  Well, everyone but me that is.....  ALL of my get togethers have included children (kids ages range from 6 to newborn, and many of my friends are pregnant or trying to get pregnant).  I actually have a bond with many of these kids so I found myself playing with the kids a lot, giving the parents a break.  I like that to a point, but then I missed out on what little adult conversation there actually was...  I love my friends dearly, but honestly......I was sooooo tired of having to clean up after kids, entertain them and much of the conversations revolved around kids too.  I don't blame my friends for that since it's natural and I'd be worried if it wasn't that way to a point.  I have no problem with that really, especially since I genuinely do enjoy children.
> 
> Yet, I found myself feeling a real sense of loss.  I was longing for the get togethers of the past where we'd all laugh and joke, go out together, travel, etc...  On one particular get together, it consisted of 4 friends and 6 children all under the age of 3.  I left feeling tired, exhausted and embarrassingly, I cried as soon as I was out of sight of the house.  We have so little in common these days.  Maybe it will change as the kids get older, I'm not sure.  I've considered joining groups of fellow-minded people as well.  That may help, but I can't help but feel like I'm in mourning for my old friends.  Does that make me selfish?
> 
> I'm curious to hear what others think about this situation.  Thanks so much.



I have to second what Madd says... try to stay in touch, at least somewhat, because in time the kids grow up & things change again.  

We have friends who's youngest just turned 16 & who's oldest 2 kids are now old enough to drink w/the adults (boy does _*that *_make me feel old!!  I remember these kids in diapers... )


----------



## KirklandTutu

maddhatir said:


> GO FOR IT!
> 
> But how do the airfares look???



Horrible, so no Disneyland this time around.
Whatever happened to cheap, last minute air fare?
It's all good though, I've got deviled eggs.


---------------------------------------------

DH and I are lucky, we have several friends who are leading a child-free lifestyle.  We have still lost several friends over the years as they've had children.  It's not that we don't want to be around them or their kids, it's just that they have no time in their life for things that aren't child-centered.


----------



## MistyMoss

zima-cheryl said:


> I have to second what Madd says... try to stay in touch, at least somewhat, because in time the kids grow up & things change again.
> 
> We have friends who's youngest just turned 16 & who's oldest 2 kids are now old enough to drink w/the adults (boy does _*that *_make me feel old!!  I remember these kids in diapers... )



I will third what Madd says too.......

Being in my late 40's most peoples kids are teens or older. We were at Lake of the Ozarks this past week and had a group of about 20 or so people. Most of the people were our age but their kids were there too. They were all over 21, so it was just one big party. Too bad we can't hang with the kids like we used to, but we still had a great time.  

We have known all of these people since before they had kids and while you may not see them as much you can still see them and remain friends. Some you will weed out as they simply want to be only with other parents and only do and talk about all things kids. Those friends unfortunately are probably gone for good.


----------



## zima-cheryl

KirklandTutu said:


> Whatever happened to cheap, last minute air fare?



Did you check Air Fare Watch Dog (http://www.airfarewatchdog.com)
I'm not sure where you are flying from?  But it might be worth checking them out.




KirklandTutu said:


> It's all good though, I've got deviled eggs.



Do you make yours with or without mustard?
And do you use regular mayonaise?  or Miracle Whip?


----------



## shaqie1

I am 35(uggg) all of my former friends have children under the age of six. I don't see them anymore. When the 1st baby was born we kit but it was alot of babysitting on my part but once this friend had her 2nd it was too much. My next friend, her sister, then had her baby. So it's me n DH for the most part. We have some friends that live about an hour away w/ no kids but never get to see them and we each have a friend from work in their 20's that are single.I am close w/ my sister but she is also bitten by the baby bug and is looking to adopt. Although I will still see her @ the many family gatherings our relationship will definately change. I guess that is the price you pay for a quiet and selfish exsistance. I think for me it is worth it! 
  My husband and I are best friends and truly enjoy each other's company. We love to travel and have 2 beautiful dogs that we adore! Maybe we will meet a couple w/ no kids but I'm in no hurry. I like having DH all to myself anyway. Most of the time when couples go out it's split men together women together! NO THANKS I am not really a fan of women and certainly do not want to entertain some woman I don't know because my DH is friends w/ her DH. I say go golfing and leave me out of it!  Oh well that;s just me.


----------



## maddhatir

shaqie1 said:


> I am 35(uggg) all of my former friends have children under the age of six. I don't see them anymore. When the 1st baby was born we kit but it was alot of babysitting on my part but once this friend had her 2nd it was too much. My next friend, her sister, then had her baby. So it's me n DH for the most part. We have some friends that live about an hour away w/ no kids but never get to see them and we each have a friend from work in their 20's that are single.I am close w/ my sister but she is also bitten by the baby bug and is looking to adopt. *Although I will still see her @ the many family gatherings our relationship will definately change*. I guess that is the price you pay for a quiet and selfish exsistance. I think for me it is worth it!
> My husband and I are best friends and truly enjoy each other's company. We love to travel and have 2 beautiful dogs that we adore! Maybe we will meet a couple w/ no kids but I'm in no hurry. I like having DH all to myself anyway. *Most of the time when couples go out it's split men together women together! NO THANKS I am not really a fan of women and certainly do not want to entertain some woman I don't know because my DH is friends w/ her DH*. I say go golfing and leave me out of it!  Oh well that;s just me.



Welcome!

I am not sure about your relationship with your sis changing for the worse! You might be surprised. I know you are not too fond of other people's kids- but when the child is your sister's- you might feel a bond!......OK a bond- but you still may want to give them back after 10 minutes- but a bond nonetheless 

I know what you mean about some women- The women I am friends with, I have known since I was a child and some I met  in my teens. And all of us girls would just hang with the guys. Even when I am the only female- I like hanging with the guys. They keep me laughing. 

I am not fond of letting other people into my circle of friends. NOT saying I am not friendly when I meet people, I might talk your ear off if we click- but I doubt seeing myself meeting someone new and wanting to hang out with them all the time. I like my circle! (even though some of my circle have kids ) 

I am still best friends with the girl who grew up next door to me- we have known each other since we were 5- and we will let people in so far- but then draw the line. 

I am always amazed at how many people out there are just not fun A lot of them seem like they need to pull the stick out! WAY to serious for me-  I like the way me and my friends "get each other" 

Sorry for rambling, too much coffee this morning --- and again, welcome! Hope you stay!


----------



## EJKorvette

TKDisneylover said:


> I recently came across a recipe for Absinthe in an herb gardening book I have.  I was considering trying this recipe, but your "fairy puke" is scaring me!



As you probably know, wormwood is the second bitterest herb. If you follow your recipe which I am sure uses all sorts of other herbs (I have seen some recipes), it will taste better.

EJKorvette


----------



## KirklandTutu

zima-cheryl said:


> Did you check Air Fare Watch Dog (http://www.airfarewatchdog.com)
> I'm not sure where you are flying from?  But it might be worth checking them out.
> 
> Thanks for the tip.  I've never used one of those websites before.  We just always go on Alaska and use DH's companies travel agent.
> No Disneyland this week, though, I should have started thinking about it on Monday!
> 
> 
> 
> Do you make yours with or without mustard?
> And do you use regular mayonaise?  or Miracle Whip?
> 
> I think my mom's reciepe calls for mayo and mustard, along with relish and  some spices.  I just went with what I had in the fridge--mayo, pickels (chopped lovingly by hand), garlic salt, pepper, and paprika.





shaqie1 said:


> Most of the time when couples go out it's split men together women together! NO THANKS I am not really a fan of women and certainly do not want to entertain some woman I don't know because my DH is friends w/ her DH. I say go golfing and leave me out of it!  Oh well that;s just me.



Word.


----------



## Bushmills

Wow, if you ever want an expedited trip into the surreal, try jumping from the first to the last page in a mult-hundred page post!  I went from reading about couples with no kids, straight into Abisynth recipes and talk of mayonaisse (sp?).

Just thought I'd add my 2 cents, as it's reassuring to read about others in our situation.  My wife and I have been married for 10 years now (surprised she's put up with me for this amount of time), and have never felt the need / desire to have kids (that and they passed several embarrasing municipal laws preventing me from procreating a few years back).  However, like other posters, we've literally lost all of our friends to the HBV (having babies virus).  They started having children, evolved their lives to revolve around said children, and over time, grew apart from us (or maybe the other way around).  Now in our mid-late 30's, we still love going out and having fun like we used to, but have no friends in the same situation to have fun with.  We LOVE Disney, and theme parks, but if we want to go with friends, we have to spend more time around the "child friendly" activities, then what we want to do.

Anyway, I digress, to previous poster's points, we have no kids, don't want children, and find ourselves alone in a sea of diapers and stressed out parents who used to like to have fun.  Ah well, maybe we should start a club.  We're spending Christmas in Disney again this year, which probably wouldn't be possible if we had youngin's.

PS - isn't wormwood  the active ingredient in Absynth?


----------



## HockeyKat

Bushmills, I feel your pain.  And I LOVE the term HBV!!!  

There is a club here in Raleigh called No Kidding.  I believe that they have chapters all over the US, so maybe there is one in your city?   I have yet to go to an event but hope to someday soon.


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> Wow, if you ever want an expedited trip into the surreal, try jumping from the first to the last page in a mult-hundred page post!  I went from reading about couples with no kids, straight into Abisynth recipes and talk of mayonaisse (sp?).
> 
> PS - isn't wormwood  the active ingredient in Absynth?



Welcome!

 We are now comfortable enough with each other to be able to discuss deviled eggs, mayo and absinthe!

Yes- wormwood is the active ingredient. But as I stated- I have never seen, nor do I think I will ever see, The Green Fairy! OK- maybe I WILL- but it will certainly not be from _drinking_ too much of anything!   

BTW- .....your name, BUSHMILLS as in Bushmills?? The whiskey??


----------



## Bushmills

HockeyKat - that's an excellent idea!  Glad someone came up with the concept.  We're up in the cold confines of Canada (Ontario), but will definately take a look for No Kidding, or something similar near us.  Maybe we should make up HBV buttons?  Then again, you can probably tell us apart by the relaxed, happy expressions on our faces, and complete lack of pablum, saliva, or other bodily fluids on us.

Maddhatir - thanks for the warm welcome!  I hear you - drinking has never caused me hallucinations, and I'll leave it at that.  Thank you for not pointing out how many ways I've *******ized the spelling of "absinthe" - I'm an atrocious, atrotious, atrosious, horrible speller.

Yes, Bushmills, the finest single malt in the world (with Red Breast coming in a close second).  Are you a fan?

PS - I hear Tim Burton's doing a remake of Alice in Wonderland, and that Depp is playing the mad hatter?


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> Maddhatir - thanks for the warm welcome!  I hear you - drinking has never caused me hallucinations, and I'll leave it at that.  Thank you for not pointing out how many ways I've *******ized the spelling of "absinthe" - I'm an atrocious, atrotious, atrosious, horrible speller.
> 
> Yes, Bushmills, the finest single malt in the world (with Red Breast coming in a close second).  Are you a fan?
> 
> PS - I hear Tim Burton's doing a remake of Alice in Wonderland, and that Depp is playing the mad hatter?



Not really a fan of the stuff- DH is though. I prefer other ways to relax! 

No, I am not one who finds pleasure in busting on people for their spelling- I am the worst speller- however, for some odd reason, I can spot a misspelled word a mile way- go figure. Spell check is my friend..... 

I heard about JD playing The Mad Hatter- I have already went off elsewhere on the DIS about how Mr Depp and Tim need to cut the ties already! How many darn movies can Tim make that forces JD to look white faced and hideous! Give me a brake!

Bring on more JD roles like in Blow, FEAR AND LOATHING thumbsup2 Just thinking about that darn movie gives me giggles! ), even his role as Rochester in The Libertine was pretty good. 

But I am anxiously awaiting to hear some movie news on Hunter's book-  _The Rum Diary_ 

I was excited about JD playing Barnabas Collins in Dark Shadows but TIM has gotten his paws on that too!


----------



## Bushmills

I completely understand and empathize regarding your comment about alternative relaxation techniques.  On an unrelated note, I like how your smiley for that line is a bright healthy green.  You're an HST fan?  NIIIICE!  I'm a huge fan of HST, Bukowski, etc.  I though Johnny Depp did an exceptional job in being Hunter.  Have you seen the video "Breakfast with Hunter"?  Sounds superficial but I've always had a soft spot for Bill Murrey's performance in "where the buffalo roam".


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> I completely understand and empathize regarding your comment about alternative relaxation techniques.  On an unrelated note, I like how your smiley for that line is a bright healthy green.  You're an HST fan?  NIIIICE!  I'm a huge fan of HST, Bukowski, etc.  I though Johnny Depp did an exceptional job in being Hunter.  Have you seen the video "Breakfast with Hunter"?  Sounds superficial but I've always had a soft spot for Bill Murrey's performance in "where the buffalo roam".



I saw _Where the Buffalo Roam _also! Bill was great!

I have not seen, _Breakfast with Hunter_- but I recently watched _Buy the Ticket, Take the Ride_! 

How about _Gonzo: The Life and Work of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson_ have you gotten around to seeing that? It is not in many theaters.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

welcome Bushmills!!! Love the HBV term! Might have to co-opt that term!


ok, I have to admit.. I have a huge problem correcting people for spelling and grammatical errors! What can I say, I'm an editor??!! But hey, it's a messageboard, I mess up a lot too! So I just let it roll off my skin and move on! 

I'd say definitely look into a No Kidding chapter or something similar. We have Child Free DFW here and we do  big get togethers at least once a month or more!  So maybe you could find something like that!?


----------



## TKDisneylover

CJK said:


> Hi all!  It's been a looooong time since I've posted on this thread so I'm sure no one remembers me from back in the day!  I haven't had the chance to read a lot of this thread, but I plan to do that very soon.  Hope everyone is doing well!
> 
> I was wondering if any of you have had to deal with this situation, and if so, how do you deal with it?????  July was a busy month for me with lots of summer visiting with friends.  We're all in our mid 30's and are busy having children.  Well, everyone but me that is.....  ALL of my get togethers have included children (kids ages range from 6 to newborn, and many of my friends are pregnant or trying to get pregnant).  I actually have a bond with many of these kids so I found myself playing with the kids a lot, giving the parents a break.  I like that to a point, but then I missed out on what little adult conversation there actually was...  I love my friends dearly, but honestly......I was sooooo tired of having to clean up after kids, entertain them and much of the conversations revolved around kids too.  I don't blame my friends for that since it's natural and I'd be worried if it wasn't that way to a point.  I have no problem with that really, especially since I genuinely do enjoy children.
> 
> Yet, I found myself feeling a real sense of loss.  I was longing for the get togethers of the past where we'd all laugh and joke, go out together, travel, etc...  On one particular get together, it consisted of 4 friends and 6 children all under the age of 3.  I left feeling tired, exhausted and embarrassingly, I cried as soon as I was out of sight of the house.  We have so little in common these days.  Maybe it will change as the kids get older, I'm not sure.  I've considered joining groups of fellow-minded people as well.  That may help, but I can't help but feel like I'm in mourning for my old friends.  Does that make me selfish?
> 
> I'm curious to hear what others think about this situation.  Thanks so much.



Welcome Back! 

I fourth what Madd said.  I would definitely suggest a girls night out, I would assume the conversations would start with kids, but you could always bring up the "old times" and change the direction of the conversations and bring back some of that laughter you enjoy.


----------



## TKDisneylover

EJKorvette said:


> As you probably know, wormwood is the second bitterest herb. If you follow your recipe which I am sure uses all sorts of other herbs (I have seen some recipes), it will taste better.
> 
> EJKorvette



Okay, I'm going to give this recipe a try and I will post and let you know how it turns out.  I'm wondering about the availability of wormwood, will I find it.  And I also read something of thujold, is it a different herb or is it what wormwood becomes?  I've read a few conflicting things about those two herbs, if they are both herbs that is.



Bushmills said:


> Wow, if you ever want an expedited trip into the surreal, try jumping from the first to the last page in a mult-hundred page post!  I went from reading about couples with no kids, straight into Abisynth recipes and talk of mayonaisse (sp?).
> 
> Just thought I'd add my 2 cents, as it's reassuring to read about others in our situation.  My wife and I have been married for 10 years now (surprised she's put up with me for this amount of time), and have never felt the need / desire to have kids (that and they passed several embarrasing municipal laws preventing me from procreating a few years back).  However, like other posters, we've literally lost all of our friends to the HBV (having babies virus).  They started having children, evolved their lives to revolve around said children, and over time, grew apart from us (or maybe the other way around).  Now in our mid-late 30's, we still love going out and having fun like we used to, but have no friends in the same situation to have fun with.  We LOVE Disney, and theme parks, but if we want to go with friends, we have to spend more time around the "child friendly" activities, then what we want to do.
> 
> Anyway, I digress, to previous poster's points, we have no kids, don't want children, and find ourselves alone in a sea of diapers and stressed out parents who used to like to have fun.  Ah well, maybe we should start a club.  We're spending Christmas in Disney again this year, which probably wouldn't be possible if we had youngin's.
> 
> PS - isn't wormwood  the active ingredient in Absynth?



​
Another fan of the HBV!  My button would say "never caught on, to the HBV".

I've become addicted to Absinthe, and as you can see above I am going to try to make my own.  DH & I are both fans of Bushmill's, however when visiting the local Irish pub we go for Tullemore Dew on the rocks, very smoooooth.  It makes for a nice subtle buzz.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Okay, I'm going to give this recipe a try and I will post and let you know how it turns out.  I'm wondering about the availability of wormwood, will I find it.  And I also read something of thujold, is it a different herb or is it what wormwood becomes?  I've read a few conflicting things about those two herbs, if they are both herbs that is.
> .



Tammy- this is what I found on thujone

What is the active ingredient in absinthe? 

One of the consituents of wormwood, thujone is considered the culprit of absinthe's "added effect". Naturally occuring in many plants and flowers, _thujone is found in large amounts in wormwood_. *A-thujone has a structure very similar to THC (tetrahyrdacannaboid). *

hmmmmm- can't compare absinthe to the effects of THC- that is for sure! well......NOT that I would know anythng about THAT!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Tammy- this is what I found on thujone
> 
> What is the active ingredient in absinthe?
> 
> One of the consituents of wormwood, thujone is considered the culprit of absinthe's "added effect". Naturally occuring in many plants and flowers, _thujone is found in large amounts in wormwood_. *A-thujone has a structure very similar to THC (tetrahyrdacannaboid). *
> 
> hmmmmm- can't compare absinthe to the effects of THC- that is for sure! well......NOT that I would know anythng about THAT!



Oh my, this is getting very interesting!  Now I'm really excited about making this recipe.  I did a search and you are right about it being a naturally occuring effect from the wormwood plant.  That's obviously the hullucinagenic quality in the absinthe (well at least from the stuff they made in 18th century France).  SWEET!

By the way, I *never* inhaled!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> Welcome!
> 
> We are now comfortable enough with each other to be able to discuss deviled eggs, mayo and absinthe!



Hmmm... Maybe if you had the deviled eggs w/the absinthe you would see the green fairy?


----------



## MistyMoss

TKDisneylover said:


> By the way, I *never* inhaled!



Nobody ever inhaled. Just ask Bill Clinton!!! I graduated high school in 1978. I don't know anything about such things.  

This doesn' compare with absinthe but we had some gourmet (yes, you read that correctly) jello shots this past week when we were down at the lake. Margarita, Sex on the Beach and my personal favorite......Chocolate covered cherry. That last one is sooooo yummy. It is just cherry jello, water and creme de cacao. Maybe a little extra on the booze part too.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Oh my, this is getting very interesting!  Now I'm really excited about making this recipe.  I did a search and you are right about it being a naturally occuring effect from the wormwood plant.  That's obviously the hullucinagenic quality in the absinthe (well at least from the stuff they made in 18th century France).  SWEET!
> 
> By the way, I *never* inhaled!



I never inhaled either-  Bad- bad- bad!

Tammy- you should just eat the wormwood forget the darn absinthe 



zima-cheryl said:


> Hmmm... Maybe if you had the deviled eggs w/the absinthe you would see the green fairy?



Hey- I am up for the challange!


----------



## zima-cheryl

MistyMoss said:


> This doesn' compare with absinthe but we had some gourmet (yes, you read that correctly) jello shots this past week when we were down at the lake. Margarita, Sex on the Beach and my personal favorite......Chocolate covered cherry. That last one is sooooo yummy. It is just cherry jello, water and creme de cacao. Maybe a little extra on the booze part too.



I'm sooo all over the chocolate covered cherry...  I know what I'm fixing this weekend!


----------



## maddhatir

MistyMoss said:


> It is just cherry jello, water and creme de cacao. Maybe a little extra on the booze part too.




 I am so mad- those jello shots always look so good (and what you described sounds crazy yummy!) but since I am a veggie- I do not eat jello!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

ok those jello shots sounds crazy good! Can't say I've ever had any described as "gourmet"  Just the good old ghetto kind for us!!


----------



## KirklandTutu

zima-cheryl said:


> Hmmm... Maybe if you had the deviled eggs w/the absinthe you would see the green fairy?



Oh my dear lord no...

I an't believe I ate a dozen deviled eggs last night.


----------



## MistyMoss

Shyvioletisme said:


> ok those jello shots sounds crazy good! Can't say I've ever had any described as "gourmet"  Just the good old ghetto kind for us!!



Oh, the kids brought the ghetto ones. They had so much vodka in them I'm surprised we weren't seeing some kind of fairies with those. 

Here is the recipe for the chocolate covered cherry ones if anyone wants it:

Chocolate Covered Cherry Jello Shots recipe
This recipe takes two very popular recipes, Chocolate Covered Cherries and Jello Shots, and combines them to make a great dessert shot.

1 cup creme de cacao
4 oz package cherry jell-o
1 cup hot water


Here are some more I have in my recipe folder:

Margarita Jell-O Shot
3 oz. package lime Jell-O
8 oz. (1 cup) boiling water
4 oz. tequila
4 oz. sweet and sour or Margarita mix
Substitute watermelon Jell-O for lime for a melon margarita. 

Strawberry Daiquiri Jell-O Shot
3 oz. package wild strawberry Jell-O
8 oz. (1 cup) Boiling water
6 oz. white rum
1 oz. sweet and sour or Margarita mix

Fuzzy Navel Jell-O Shot
3 oz. package orange Jell-O
8 oz. (1 cup) boiling water
2 oz. vodka
6 oz. peach schnapps

Cherry Amaretto Jell-O Shot
3 oz. package cherry Jell-O
8 oz. (1 cup) boiling water
2 oz. cold water
6 oz. amaretto

Sex on the Beach Jell-O Shot
3 oz. package orange Jell-O
8 oz. (1 cup) boiling cranberry juice
3 oz. peach schnapps
5 oz. vodka

The twenty something kids were slurping down the Sex on the Beach ones like they were just jello. They all looked pretty rough the next day too. They haven't learned to pace themselves like us old folks.


----------



## Goobergal99

MistyMoss said:


> Oh, the kids brought the ghetto ones. They had so much vodka in them I'm surprised we weren't seeing some kind of fairies with those.
> 
> Here is the recipe for the chocolate covered cherry ones if anyone wants it:
> 
> Chocolate Covered Cherry Jello Shots recipe
> This recipe takes two very popular recipes, Chocolate Covered Cherries and Jello Shots, and combines them to make a great dessert shot.
> 
> 1 cup creme de cacao
> 4 oz package cherry jell-o
> 1 cup hot water
> 
> 
> Here are some more I have in my recipe folder:
> 
> Margarita Jell-O Shot
> 3 oz. package lime Jell-O
> 8 oz. (1 cup) boiling water
> 4 oz. tequila
> 4 oz. sweet and sour or Margarita mix
> Substitute watermelon Jell-O for lime for a melon margarita.
> 
> Strawberry Daiquiri Jell-O Shot
> 3 oz. package wild strawberry Jell-O
> 8 oz. (1 cup) Boiling water
> 6 oz. white rum
> 1 oz. sweet and sour or Margarita mix
> 
> Fuzzy Navel Jell-O Shot
> 3 oz. package orange Jell-O
> 8 oz. (1 cup) boiling water
> 2 oz. vodka
> 6 oz. peach schnapps
> 
> Cherry Amaretto Jell-O Shot
> 3 oz. package cherry Jell-O
> 8 oz. (1 cup) boiling water
> 2 oz. cold water
> 6 oz. amaretto
> 
> Sex on the Beach Jell-O Shot
> 3 oz. package orange Jell-O
> 8 oz. (1 cup) boiling cranberry juice
> 3 oz. peach schnapps
> 5 oz. vodka
> 
> The twenty something kids were slurping down the Sex on the Beach ones like they were just jello. They all looked pretty rough the next day too. They haven't learned to pace themselves like us old folks.



yum


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Tammy- you should just eat the wormwood forget the darn absinthe



Now that sounds like an idea because I just looked at my recipe for Absinthe "Liqueur" and it takes 6 weeks & 2 days to "age properly".  So I guess I will not be posting my results for quite a while.  



KirklandTutu said:


> Oh my dear lord no...
> 
> I an't believe I ate a dozen deviled eggs last night.



 



MistyMoss said:


> Here is the recipe for the chocolate covered cherry ones if anyone wants it:
> 
> Chocolate Covered Cherry Jello Shots recipe
> This recipe takes two very popular recipes, Chocolate Covered Cherries and Jello Shots, and combines them to make a great dessert shot.
> 
> 1 cup creme de cacao
> 4 oz package cherry jell-o
> 1 cup hot water
> 
> The twenty something kids were slurping down the Sex on the Beach ones like they were just jello. They all looked pretty rough the next day too. They haven't learned to pace themselves like us old folks.



Thanks so much for the recipe's they all sound great!  I can't wait to make these for a party and impress everyone with "gourmet" jello shots!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

thanks for the recipes!! I'll have to try them out soon! I haven't had jello shots in several years! lol. so it should be interesting.


----------



## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> Oh my dear lord no...
> 
> I an't believe I ate a dozen deviled eggs last night.




ooooo- that just sounds wrong! 

I hope you are OK today!


----------



## CJK

Thanks everyone!  Love hearing all your thoughts and laughing at your stories.  I suddenly have a hankering for some jello shots....


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> *ooooo- that just sounds wrong! *I hope you are OK today!



you got that right.! I can't imagine eating that many in one day..lol. and I love me some eggs!


----------



## KirklandTutu

maddhatir said:


> ooooo- that just sounds wrong!
> 
> I hope you are OK today!



Lol, yup, everythings fine.  


I should share my favorite summer drink with you all. 

Lazy Man's Sangria

1 part cheap red wine
1 part 7-up or like drink
--if you want to work more, cut up a lime and add
serve over ice


----------



## zima-cheryl

Hmmm...

Sangria, deviled eggs, jello shots & absinthe....

Sounds like we have the beginnings of a wild weekend picnic!


----------



## tennvalgirl

maddhatir said:


> A storm started approaching about 3/4 of the way into the tour. The wind picked up, thunder, lightning- we made it back to the Visitors Center just in time for the downpour
> 
> I wanted to go into Independence Hall, see the gardens, the cemeteries and do lunch at a Stephen Starr restaurant that was recommended to us by our tour guide!
> 
> I told DH I need a b-day part 2! He felt so bad and agreed, so we will go back soon.
> 
> I never ask for anything for my b-day or on holidays, only b/c I get everything I want all year long Mom gave me some $$ so I am going to get myself an IPod- yes, I might be the only left on the earth without one!



An Ipod is an essential to  enjoying life...kids, not so much


----------



## maddhatir

tennvalgirl said:


> An Ipod is an essential to  enjoying life...kids, not so much



Welcome! Is this your first time here? Or have you been lurking?!


----------



## maddhatir

OMG! I think I am in love with the actor Seth Rogan! 

He is on Howard talking about he loves to "smoke"  all day and can't stand kids! 

This sounds a bit harsh- but to hear him say it- is hilarious- Howard asked him what he would do if Seth's girlfriend tricked him and got pregnant- Seth said- I would tell her SHE has to take care of the $#@%ing little rat! 

I have to get my butt moving and go see _Pineapple Express_!  Has anyone seen it yet?

This dude is FUN-NY!!!!!!!! He sounds like such a cool guy! He is not holding back on anything!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> OMG! I think I am in love with the actor Seth Rogan!
> 
> He is on Howard talking about he loves to "smoke"  all day and can't stand kids!
> 
> This sounds a bit harsh- but to hear him say it- is hilarious- Howard asked him what he would do if Seth's girlfriend tricked him and got pregnant- Seth said- I would tell her SHE has to take care of the $#@%ing little rat!
> 
> I have to get my butt moving and go see _Pineapple Express_!  Has anyone seen it yet?
> 
> This dude is FUN-NY!!!!!!!! He sounds like such a cool guy! He is not holding back on anything!





LOVE Seth Rogan...DH and I saw the movie this weekend and liked it..(it has James Franco , how could I not?)
But didn't love  it as much as some of his other movies...and still nothing will compare for me to Freaks and Geeks...that is still one of my all time favorite shows and it was just perfect!


----------



## tennvalgirl

maddhatir said:


> Welcome! Is this your first time here? Or have you been lurking?!



 Me lurk long time


I love what I call the "freedom" thread


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> OMG! I think I am in love with the actor Seth Rogan!
> 
> He is on Howard talking about he loves to "smoke"  all day and can't stand kids!
> 
> This sounds a bit harsh- but to hear him say it- is hilarious- Howard asked him what he would do if Seth's girlfriend tricked him and got pregnant- Seth said- I would tell her SHE has to take care of the $#@%ing little rat!
> 
> I have to get my butt moving and go see _Pineapple Express_!  Has anyone seen it yet?
> 
> This dude is FUN-NY!!!!!!!! He sounds like such a cool guy! He is not holding back on anything!



I'm assuming then that you have not seen him in "Knocked Up"?  You should rent it, it's pretty funny too!  Definitely lots of    It does involve the girl getting pregnant, but it's still funny.

We will wait for Pineapple Express to come out on DVD.  DH just bought a 52" flat screen so we have a theatre in our home now (DH is big into electronics so we've also got surround sound).  We're just waiting for the double reclining love seat with cup holders to come in the end of August.  Ahhh, I cannot wait, we'll be watching movies in the peace & quiet of our home.  The last movie we went to someone had brought their baby to the movie and it cried the entire time!   What is up with that!?!?! 

PS:  *Madd,* no ghost hunting last weekend, DH was not in the mood, hoping to give it a try this weekend.


----------



## TKDisneylover

tennvalgirl said:


> Me lurk long time



​


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I'm assuming then that you have not seen him in "Knocked Up"?  You should rent it, it's pretty funny too!  Definitely lots of    It does involve the girl getting pregnant, but it's still funny.



Yes- I have seen Knocked Up. Heck- I used to watch him in Freaks and Geeks!

I wonder where that REAL tall dude with the glasses is? He used to crack me the HECK up!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Yes- I have seen Knocked Up. Heck- I used to watch him in Freaks and Geeks!
> 
> I wonder where that REAL tall dude with the glasses is? He used to crack me the HECK up!



Do you mean Bill(the nerd)? If so, he was in Knocked up...he was the friend who was growing the beard...
He's also made cameos and had small roles in various other Judd Apatow projects!


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> Do you mean Bill(the nerd)? If so, he was in Knocked up...he was the friend who was growing the beard...
> He's also made cameos and had small roles in various other Judd Apatow projects!



YES! OMG! I just Googled him! I am usually good at picking out people from long ago- but he looks totally different!


----------



## Mayhem2008

Hey everyone! I'm back! Actually I've been lurking alot and then last week I went to Mayhem Fest in Mansfield, MA. It was amazing! I didn't see all the bands because I was busy doing other things and mainly went to see Slipknot. 

How's everyone? Summer is almost over but we really haven't gotten any great weather here in Maine. Rain, rain and more rain. We bought a beautiful new grill on Saturday, spent 2 hours putting the bloody thing together, fired it up, threw on the burgers and promptly ran outta gas.   I TOLD Gary we should get the tank filled but noooooo, he didn't listen. Men!   Hopefully I'll be on here more often now that things are settling down.

Have a good one everybody!


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> Hey everyone! I'm back! Actually I've been lurking alot and then last week I went to Mayhem Fest in Mansfield, MA. It was amazing! I didn't see all the bands because I was busy doing other things and mainly went to see Slipknot.
> 
> How's everyone? Summer is almost over but we really haven't gotten any great weather here in Maine. Rain, rain and more rain. We bought a beautiful new grill on Saturday, spent 2 hours putting the bloody thing together, fired it up, threw on the burgers and promptly ran outta gas.   I TOLD Gary we should get the tank filled but noooooo, he didn't listen. Men!   Hopefully I'll be on here more often now that things are settling down.
> 
> Have a good one everybody!




Heyyyyy! Glad to see you back! I was wondering how the Festival was! I HOPE you got to see Slip Knot for crying out loud! Any pics!!!??

Our Mayhem Fest is Friday- but we decided not to go I TOLD DH he would love to see Slip Knot live- but it was a no-go! 

I think I have DH hooked on seeing the good bands in the smaller venues!- We are going to see Opeth in September!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Mayhem2008 said:


> Hey everyone! I'm back! Actually I've been lurking alot and then last week I went to Mayhem Fest in Mansfield, MA. It was amazing! I didn't see all the bands because I was busy doing other things and mainly went to see Slipknot.





Mayhem2008 said:


>



So how did your new boots go over, did you get a lot of compliments on them?



> How's everyone? Summer is almost over but we really haven't gotten any great weather here in Maine. Rain, rain and more rain. We bought a beautiful new grill on Saturday, spent 2 hours putting the bloody thing together, fired it up, threw on the burgers and promptly ran outta gas.   I TOLD Gary we should get the tank filled but noooooo, he didn't listen. Men!   Hopefully I'll be on here more often now that things are settling down.



Since you've been lurking you know how my summer has gone, smacked a couple teenagers around at Matisyahu during Summerfest, been drinking absinthe hoping to see the green fairy, and the new deck is done!  

Wish I could get DH to get a gas grill, he is a total charcoal guy.

Glad to hear you had a good time at the Mayhem fest!


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> Heyyyyy! Glad to see you back! I was wondering how the Festival was! I HOPE you got to see Slip Knot for crying out loud! Any pics!!!??



*Ohhh yes I got to see them.. Some of them up close and personal too   I sent you an email with some pics I can't put on here but I will post a couple. They have been tagged already..sorry bout that! *


















TKDisneylover said:


> So how did your new boots go over, did you get a lot of compliments on them?
> 
> Glad to hear you had a good time at the Mayhem fest!



*Yes! I did get compilments on them and it was funny because one girl wanted to give me her gummi fish just because she thought they were so cool. I laffed like hell over that one! The crowd there was really great. No trouble that I could see, everyone behaved themselves and had a blast!*


----------



## maddhatir

All I Can Say Is......*I'M JEALOUS*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## MistyMoss

Mayhem: Your pics turned out great! You need to post a pic of you in those boots. 

On another subject................where the heck has the summer gone!!?? I can't believe it is almost over already. Our cruise to Alaska is almost here!!! But I still wish the summer was not almost over.

Duncan the dog turned 11 this summer and it is starting to hit home that he won't be around forever. You know they won't but you still want them to. At least he is still a goofy playful 11 year old.


----------



## TKDisneylover

MistyMoss said:


> Mayhem: Your pics turned out great! You need to post a pic of you in those boots.
> 
> On another subject................where the heck has the summer gone!!?? I can't believe it is almost over already. Our cruise to Alaska is almost here!!! But I still wish the summer was not almost over.
> 
> Duncan the dog turned 11 this summer and it is starting to hit home that he won't be around forever. You know they won't but you still want them to. At least he is still a goofy playful 11 year old.




30 days til you cruise, it will be here in no time.   Have you started packing yet?

I agree, summer is really going fast, but I have to admit fall is my favorite time of year.  And we have a vacation planned the last week of October but we're still not sure what we're doing.  Originally it was going to be a 5-day Caribbean cruise, but thoughts of Disneyworld have been dancing in our heads.  We have no reservation set yet, but hoping that Disney puts out a Disney Visa package discount for Oct.

And I know how you feel about your dog, ours just turned 13!  The vet said she thinks Veda could hang in there up to 14 because her eyes & teeth are still in good condition.  She's got a few fatty tumors but so far none that we need to be concerned about.  We do have her on Rimadyl, the arthritis meds for pets and it has helped considerably with her bad hips.  She's definitely not as spunky as she used to be but she's still chasing the squirrels & rabbits when she gets the chance.


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> All I Can Say Is......*I'M JEALOUS*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



*No,no..don't be jealous FN!  *



MistyMoss said:


> Mayhem: Your pics turned out great! You need to post a pic of you in those boots.
> 
> Duncan the dog turned 11 this summer and it is starting to hit home that he won't be around forever. You know they won't but you still want them to. At least he is still a goofy playful 11 year old.



*I would post a pic of me and the boots but I don't put my face anywhere on here.  I will say that they are wicked comfortable. I had them on for 14 hours straight, on my feet most of that time and they never bothered me a bit. I can show you a still shot from a video production I was part of that day. LOL The boot is to the right of the screen  
I understand exactly what you mean about Duncan. Our Maggie will be 11 this year, Rio will be 10 and Dolci turned 8. If I even get a quick thought about life without any of them it depresses me instantly. I can't imagine not waking up to my little gang first thing in the morning, having an audience when I go to the bathroom, etc 
Hope everyone has a great day! It's raining here again! 43 more days till Disney! *


----------



## maddhatir

OMG- Slip Knot is on right now- The Blister Exists (live)


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> OMG- Slip Knot is on right now- The Blister Exists (live)



*Have you seen the new vid for "Psychosocial"? It's brilliant! Sid's mask has eyebrows that move when he triggers a little switch. He rolled out to the edge of the stage at the show to wiggle them all at us. You wouldn't believe where the switch was...let's just say I thought he had a private itch before I realized what he was really doing!  
The Blister Exists is one of my fav songs. When they played it at the show everyone just screamed. Good headbanger and an even better wake up song *


----------



## TKDisneylover

Mayhem2008 said:


> *Have you seen the new vid for "Psychosocial"? It's brilliant! Sid's mask has eyebrows that move when he triggers a little switch. He rolled out to the edge of the stage at the show to wiggle them all at us. You wouldn't believe where the switch was...let's just say I thought he had a private itch before I realized what he was really doing!
> The Blister Exists is one of my fav songs. When they played it at the show everyone just screamed. Good headbanger and an even better wake up song *



I just watched the full version of the Psychosocial video on YouTube last night, very cool!  I noticed Craig Jones mask with all the long nails sticking out of it.  Totally reminded me of Pinhead from the Hellraiser movies (my favs!), I'm sure that's where he got the idea for the mask, again very cool!


----------



## maddhatir

OMG Mayhem! 

Those kitties in your siggy are FREAKING CRACKING ME UP!


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> OMG Mayhem!
> 
> Those kitties in your siggy are FREAKING CRACKING ME UP!




*Picture those cats yelling "INCOMING!!!" I couldn't resist them when I saw them. Looks like they are on Splash Mountain, eh? I knew you would love them! 

TK, most people think those spikes are made out of rubber but they really are spikes! I'd love to have it when I go shopping at Christmas time..good way to get thru the crowd fast. The fake Craig masks that are sold have spikes that are made out of something that resembles drinking straws. Twould be cool to get one and replace it with those different colored bendy straws!!  *


----------



## PoohNTuck

*Bushmills*- Welcome.  We're a few hrs south in New England and often feel as though we are the only ones without kids too.  Procreation is a popular cold weather activity... the closest "no kidding" group is down in Mass!  We found a group on meetup.com to go out to eat with and have started going out with them regularly.  Hope you guys can meet some new people too! 

*Misty*- Thanks for the jello shot recipes.  Copied em to the hard drive for future reference.  Mmm, tasty!  Have fun on your cruise to Alaska.  We love to cruise and will be looking forward to details, pics, fun stories... it should be wonderful.  I've heard nothing but good things about people's cruises there!

*And last, but not least, everyone else*- I certainly enjoy checking in to see how everyone is doing.  DH and I have some short trips planned.  In a few weeks we're headed to SC and plan to visit a plantation and a wild animal preserve!  We usually eat well while there too.

I celebrated my birthday this week.  DH did a nice job making me feel special.  30 is now less than 1 year away... I'd like something REALLY special for 30.  Is that wrong??!!!  Am I putting too much into 30?  Quite frankly, 30 feels like the last big hurrah until...gulp, 50.  I mean, 36, 39, 43...does anyone get giddy over 43??!  I think 30 is my last shot at a crazy fun time.  Suggestions, ideas... or should we just plan on another dinner, movie, cheesecake and frapuccino fest for next year??

We didn't want to wait an hour for pineapple express so I went to see Mamma Mia... can I tell you, we were both way too young for that film   I loved it on broadway but as a movie, totally a "menopausal fantasy" as DH described it.  At least the Greek Scenery and goofiness of a musical kept us entertained.  I laughed and cried... of course I cried through 3 of the previews too so... I don't know, I was a hormonal mess 

Alrighty, sending out warm wishes to you all.  Hope you enjoy your weekend... Friday means back to work for me!


----------



## MistyMoss

PoohNTuck:  I would look into a Mexican all inclusive for your 30th. Madd has listed some she has been to and they sound great!  Vegas with bells and whistles, a cruise to somewhere different than you would go ordinarily. The list is endless of where you could go.

I will be turning 49 this year so next year will be the big "50". DH will be 50 in November so we have several things planned for both our B-days. 

Alaska in September 
Vegas in March
DCL cruise and VB next September.
Hawaii the next year for our 25th anniversary. (That doesn't count for our B-days but the 25th is a biggie) 

I don't know what we will do on our actual birthdays because DH doesn't want a party. He would much rather just travel. I am thinking of getting a nice hotel at least the night of his B-day. 

I am rambling since I am at work and on Diet Pepsi at the moment. Guess I better shut up.


----------



## maddhatir

PoohNTuck said:


> We didn't want to wait an hour for pineapple express so I went to see Mamma Mia... can I tell you, we were both way too young for that film   I loved it on broadway but as a movie, totally a "menopausal fantasy" as DH described it.  At least the Greek Scenery and goofiness of a musical kept us entertained.  I laughed and cried... of course I cried through 3 of the previews too so... I don't know, I was a hormonal mess



First! Happy B-day!!!!!

and, I am not sure if mentioned this in this particular thread-- but I also saw Mamma Mia- NOT by choice- it was mom's b-day and she really wanted to see it, so I took her for her b-day. Dear GOD I wanted to poke my eyes out with a fork!

I am *SO* not a musical person (heck- I did not even like Sweeney Todd! )- I described Mamma Mia as, WAY TOO DRAMATIC! OMG- the singing and even the dialogue was way too dramatic for me! I wanted to tell the people on screen to _settle down for crying out loud_! it gave me chest pains   But I sat through it for mom! 

My MIL keeps telling me to go see musicals/shows/plays in Philly and I want to bang her head against the wall and ask her if she hears me when I say I HATE MUSICALS etc! She never listens. Drive me NUTS! 

oh- BTW.....um, happy Friday! 

(it is only 8:25 and I am feeling psycho!:


----------



## maddhatir

MistyMoss said:


> I am rambling since I am at work and on Diet Pepsi at the moment. Guess I better shut up.



 I was just going to apologize for my rambling above b/c I have had 3 cups of coffee already this morning!


----------



## Mayhem2008

POOHNTUCK....
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



I still get giddy over my birthdays and I'm looking at my 47th this year.

Madd I LOL thinking of you sitting thru Mamma Mia   Did you have your fingers in your ears, yelling "La la la I can't hear you!" 

Glad to know I am in the company of coffee drinkers. I'm not worth doodie unless I've drained the 12 cup pot every morning, and all those trips to the bathroom are exercise in my book! While I was in NY my father slipped my decaf one morning. He said there was no difference? I beg to differ! I felt like I was still in a sleep coma!


----------



## TKDisneylover

PoohNTuck said:


> I celebrated my birthday this week.  DH did a nice job making me feel special.  30 is now less than 1 year away... I'd like something REALLY special for 30.  Is that wrong??!!!  Am I putting too much into 30?  Quite frankly, 30 feels like the last big hurrah until...gulp, 50.  I mean, 36, 39, 43...does anyone get giddy over 43??!  I think 30 is my last shot at a crazy fun time.  Suggestions, ideas... or should we just plan on another dinner, movie, cheesecake and frapuccino fest for next year??



​
It's just a number in my book.  I'm 44 and still partying, not quite as hard as if I did in my 20's but I can definitely handle a couple shots on a night out.  I just don't drink the crap anymore, only the good stuff, that's what prevents the hangovers.  And I think the majority of posters on this board are still having a "crazy fun time".  And I have to admit that when I turned 40 I was so excited, I can't tell you specifically why but I had a kick a** good time(I think it felt like an accomplishment).  My DH & co-workers threw me a great surprise party at my favorite Mexican restaurant, the majority were in their 30's & 40's and we all succeeded in hanging out until bar close.  I also have to add that I know quite a few people in their 50's who are still having a great time, so the fun still does not stop there. (sorry for the lecture, I couldn't help myself.)

Definitely do something fun for your 30th, you definitely deserve it!   As MistyMoss said, the list is endless.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I am *SO* not a musical person (heck- I did not even like Sweeney Todd! )- I described Mamma Mia as, WAY TOO DRAMATIC! OMG- the singing and even the dialogue was way too dramatic for me! I wanted to tell the people on screen to _settle down for crying out loud_! it gave me chest pains   But I sat through it for mom!



When Sweeney Todd first started I didn't think I was going to make it through it because I hate musicals.  I think it was the blood that kept me going, and then of course when the "bodies started hitting the floor" it made it that much easier to watch.  Must be the horror flick fan in me.



Mayhem2008 said:


> Madd I LOL thinking of you sitting thru Mamma Mia   Did you have your fingers in your ears, yelling "La la la I can't hear you!"



I actually do this!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> When Sweeney Todd first started I didn't think I was going to make it through it because I hate musicals.  I think it was the blood that kept me going, and then of course when the "bodies started hitting the floor" it made it that much easier to watch.  Must be the horror flick fan in me.



Thank GOD I had JD to look at most of time!

JD, Blood and bodies hitting the floor- what else can you ask for in a movie!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

Mayhem2008 said:


> POOHNTUCK....
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> [/IMG]



this completely made me giggle...I don't know why!! I think I'm just a litle loopy this morning...which I guess isn't really much different from any other time...


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> Madd I LOL thinking of you sitting thru Mamma Mia   Did you have your fingers in your ears, yelling "La la la I can't hear you!"


----------



## PhotobearSam

Madd....Have you heard the rumor...Mr. Depp is supposed to be cast as the next Riddler in the Batman Movie...My DH thinks that would be really cool. What about you???


----------



## maddhatir

PhotobearSam said:


> Madd....Have you heard the rumor...Mr. Depp is supposed to be cast as the next Riddler in the Batman Movie...My DH thinks that would be really cool. What about you???



WHY of course I have- and The Mad Hatter in Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland!

How have you been Sam!? How's business?


----------



## zima-cheryl

PoohNTuck said:


> I celebrated my birthday this week.  DH did a nice job making me feel special.  30 is now less than 1 year away... I'd like something REALLY special for 30.  Is that wrong??!!!  Am I putting too much into 30?  Quite frankly, 30 feels like the last big hurrah until...gulp, 50.  I mean, 36, 39, 43...does anyone get giddy over 43??!  I think 30 is my last shot at a crazy fun time.  Suggestions, ideas... or should we just plan on another dinner, movie, cheesecake and frapuccino fest for next year??



Happy Birthday PoohNTuck!  
 
I don't think you can put too much into any birthday.  Birthdays are a big deal every year in our family -- always been that way.  My parents always made me feel like Queen for the day on your birthday.  And fortunately DH has picked up & followed suit.  Everyone deserves to be spoiled on their birthday -- I'm mean spoiled stinking rotten!



TKDisneylover said:


> ...And I have to admit that when I turned 40 I was so excited, I can't tell you specifically why but I had a kick a** good time(I think it felt like an accomplishment).  My DH & co-workers threw me a great surprise party at my favorite Mexican restaurant, the majority were in their 30's & 40's and we all succeeded in hanging out until bar close.



My 40th is in 2009, and I've already started planning it.  It really feels like a big one to me too -- and I'm actually looking forward to it.

We will be at WDW (of course) -- Probably at the Polly.  
I'm thinking Illuminations Cruise, champagne, tiara, "Foxy & Forty" t-shirt, have to get the birthday button for the day, I plan to ride in the front of the monorail (never done that), and if DH could arrange a chorus of "Happy Birthday" by the Voices of Liberty... well that is a good start!   
(Think that is a bit over the top??  Maybe I should skip the birthday pin??  )


----------



## MistyMoss

maddhatir said:


> WHY of course I have- and The Mad Hatter in Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland!
> 
> How have you been Sam!? How's business?



I still want to see JD as Barnabas Collins in the remake of Dark Shadows. JD sucking blood out of someones neck. Oooohhhh my!!!!!


----------



## maddhatir

MistyMoss said:


> I still want to see JD as Barnabas Collins in the remake of Dark Shadows. *JD sucking blood out of someones neck*. Oooohhhh my!!!!!



Me! ME! Oh PLEASE let it be me!


----------



## MistyMoss

maddhatir said:


> Me! ME! Oh PLEASE let it be me!



Just hold on there woman!!!! I called it first!!!!! Don't forget as wenches we have to share!!


----------



## KirklandTutu

I'd just like to say thank you to the people who gripe about school supplies and hoarding, etc on discussion boards...

Without you, I would have had no idea that I could totally stock up in August with office supplies for my business.  

I guess you do miss out on some things when you don't have kids, like knowing about killer sales.


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> Thank GOD I had JD to look at most of time!
> 
> JD, Blood and bodies hitting the floor- what else can you ask for in a movie!



*Ok, you know how my mind works....I was picturing you sitting in the theater, taking nips from a bottle of Jack Daniels and it finally hit me that's NOT what "JD" meant!  We both have an affection for JD, except mine is in the bottle 
We actually had a nice day yesterday so I went up to the city for shopping. I was standing in line when a little boy in front of me, who had been staring at my tattoos said "why do you draw on yourself?" I answered "because MY mom lets me!" 
I have to start getting ready for my trip but can't get motivated! I need to make vet appointments for all my "kids", hotel arrangements for when we travel to NY to catch the plane to Florida (I have to drop my little dog off at "Grandma & Grandpa's" for the week) have my streaks in my hair changed from purple to red (fall colors ya know!) and thinking of getting a new tattoo before I go as well. Trouble is I can't decide on what I want done this time. I have about 5 different ideas but only money for one. I know I want to have Brian from Family Guy done, holding his Martini glass, but also want a few other things, including 3 more Slipknot tattoos. One of them is the drummer's face (mask).  I have a couple of weeks to decide. If I can't make up my mind I'll just wait until I get back. I don't like to make snap decisions on my tats!
Gonna be a boring weekend for me. Hubby's working all weekend, 16 hour shifts, so I won't see him much, and it's raining AGAIN here! GRRRRRR
Hope you all have a good one and please send some nice weather our way!! Do we need a kitty for the day? Me thinks so!



*


----------



## metalis4ever

I don't want to have kids until I am at least 30 yo if ever mainly because I am selfish and I don't want to give up things that I hold dear such as blasting True Heavy Metal loud and proud, Transformer toys and most importantly my own Disney experience. My DW agress with me to an extent but she loves kids so I may have to compromise LOL


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> My 40th is in 2009, and I've already started planning it.  It really feels like a big one to me too -- and I'm actually looking forward to it.
> 
> We will be at WDW (of course) -- Probably at the Polly.
> I'm thinking Illuminations Cruise, champagne, tiara, "Foxy & Forty" t-shirt, have to get the birthday button for the day, I plan to ride in the front of the monorail (never done that), and if DH could arrange a chorus of "Happy Birthday" by the Voices of Liberty... well that is a good start!
> (Think that is a bit over the top??  Maybe I should skip the birthday pin??  )



Sounds like a great birthday plan to me!! 



Mayhem2008 said:


> * and it's raining AGAIN here! GRRRRRR  Hope you all have a good one and please send some nice weather our way!! *




  *Sending some sunshine your way * ​


----------



## Mayhem2008

*TK! It worked!! We are having a beautiful day here!  
Everyone must be off doing fun shizzle for the weekend so I'll just contribute a daily dose of cat and go enjoy the sun while I can*


----------



## maddhatir

MistyMoss said:


> Just hold on there woman!!!! I called it first!!!!! Don't forget as wenches we have to share!!



You are right! We must share!  Remember, I *did* go to therapy for these possessive JD/Capt. issues in the past- I think I need to go back for a re-eval!


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> *Ok, you know how my mind works....I was picturing you sitting in the theater, taking nips from a bottle of Jack Daniels and it finally hit me that's NOT what "JD" meant!  We both have an affection for JD, except mine is in the bottle
> We actually had a nice day yesterday so I went up to the city for shopping. I was standing in line when a little boy in front of me, who had been staring at my tattoos said "why do you draw on yourself?" I answered "because MY mom lets me!"
> I have to start getting ready for my trip but can't get motivated! I need to make vet appointments for all my "kids", hotel arrangements for when we travel to NY to catch the plane to Florida (I have to drop my little dog off at "Grandma & Grandpa's" for the week) have my streaks in my hair changed from purple to red (fall colors ya know!) and thinking of getting a new tattoo before I go as well. Trouble is I can't decide on what I want done this time. I have about 5 different ideas but only money for one. I know I want to have Brian from Family Guy done, holding his Martini glass, but also want a few other things, including 3 more Slipknot tattoos. One of them is the drummer's face (mask).  I have a couple of weeks to decide. If I can't make up my mind I'll just wait until I get back. I don't like to make snap decisions on my tats!
> Gonna be a boring weekend for me. Hubby's working all weekend, 16 hour shifts, so I won't see him much, and it's raining AGAIN here! GRRRRRR
> Hope you all have a good one and please send some nice weather our way!! Do we need a kitty for the day? Me thinks so!
> 
> 
> 
> *



May- I am cracking up about you changing the streak in your hair- aren't priorities GREAT! I was reading a thread somewhere on the DIS about what to pack for your Disney vacation, and these moms sound like they are packing for a month b/c they are bringing some of the oddest things that the kids might need, they never think of themselves- and all we have to worry about is, ..........our HAIR!

I can send you some sunshine from Jersey b/c we have a lot of it today!


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> May- I am cracking up about you changing the streak in your hair- aren't priorities GREAT! I was reading a thread somewhere on the DIS about what to pack for your Disney vacation, and these moms sound like they are packing for a month b/c they are bringing some of the oddest things that the kids might need, they never think of themselves- and all we have to worry about is, ..........our HAIR!
> 
> I can send you some sunshine from Jersey b/c we have a lot of it today!



 The other priority is how to stow the booze so nothing breaks on the trip down (there won't be any to bring back ) and I even bought big, new fancy plastic glasses so we don't have to use the little ones they leave in the rooms. Talk about priorities!   DH and I were watching something about Epcot last night and he said "ooohhh Epcot's one big bar isn't it!"  
I finally bit the bullet today and ordered a swimsuit but I am not happy about wearing one. Even after losing all this weight I still don't want to be so undressed in public. Am I the only one that goes thru garbage like this? Self image is such a touchy thing. 
I'm off to sit in the sun (is that Jersey sun I see?) Have a good one everybody?


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> The other priority is how to stow the booze so nothing breaks on the trip down (there won't be any to bring back ) and I even bought big, new fancy plastic glasses so we don't have to use the little ones they leave in the rooms. Talk about priorities!   DH and I were watching something about Epcot last night and he said "ooohhh Epcot's one big bar isn't it!"
> I finally bit the bullet today and ordered a swimsuit but I am not happy about wearing one. Even after losing all this weight I still don't want to be so undressed in public. Am I the only one that goes thru garbage like this? Self image is such a touchy thing.
> I'm off to sit in the sun (is that Jersey sun I see?) Have a good one everybody?



UGH! I HATE bathing suits! I finally broke down last year before our Mexico trip I went to California Sunshine and bought 2 suits that really fit me nice- granted the 2 together cost about $300.00 but I think that is what you have to spend anymore to really get a good fit.......and some nice selections. And it also helps when you starve yourself 2 weeks before your vacation- no bloating! .....talk about self image! 

I wanted to comment about the JD in my last post but forgot- 

we do both have JD in common- we like to "drink it all in" but in different ways!    I think it is safe to say we even both drool when we see JD!


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> I wanted to comment about the JD in my last post but forgot-
> 
> we do both have JD in common- we like to "drink it all in" but in different ways!    I think it is safe to say we even both drool when we see JD!



  But really, I save my drooling for masked men and I'm not talking about Batman or the Lone Ranger


----------



## TKDisneylover

Mayhem2008 said:


> *TK! It worked!! We are having a beautiful day here!
> Everyone must be off doing fun shizzle for the weekend so I'll just contribute a daily dose of cat and go enjoy the sun while I can*



Excellent, my chat with mother nature must have helped! 



Mayhem2008 said:


> The other priority is how to stow the booze so nothing breaks on the trip down (there won't be any to bring back ) and I even bought big, new fancy plastic glasses so we don't have to use the little ones they leave in the rooms. Talk about priorities!   DH and I were watching something about Epcot last night and he said "ooohhh Epcot's one big bar isn't it!"



DH & I do this same thing when heading on vacation.  Thankfully these days most of the bottles are plastic now, much easier for transportation in the checked luggage.  Of course I still put them in ziplock baggies just in case, I don't want my clothes smelling like tequila, or rum, or Bailey's (that's for the morning coffee), or gin, or......well, you know where I'm coming from.   And your DH is right about EPCOT being one big bar, we love "drinking around the world"! 



maddhatir said:


> we do both have JD in common- we like to "drink it all in" but in different ways!    I think it is safe to say we even both drool when we see JD!





Mayhem2008 said:


> But really, I save my drooling for masked men and I'm not talking about Batman or the Lone Ranger



Time to get the drool cups out.  

Happy Monday everyone!


----------



## zima-cheryl

So did anyone else catch this news story?  Evidently there are quite a few of us child-free folks out there...
http://www.census.gov/prod/2008pubs/p20-558.pdf

The interesting part is that women are ending up w/1.9 kids which is, as they put it, below replacement value.  So basically there aren't enough kids being born to replace all the people we have now.  

Europe has been dealing w/that for a few years.  Every once in a while you catch a story.  They are really hurting for older, educated & trained workers.  I've thought about spending a year or two over there.  How cool to work there and enjoy the continent!?!  And we are just what they want --older, trained & skilled workers w/no kids & no desire to stay & become a drain on their society & systems.  

Now if I could just master those Spanish lessons!


----------



## maddhatir

Slip Knot question for Mayhem--

I am here working my butt off listening to Hard Attack- and the song Liberate comes on- I ALWAYS sing....."Liberate....*BA-NAN-AS*!"    

What are they saying


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> Slip Knot question for Mayhem--
> 
> I am here working my butt off listening to Hard Attack- and the song Liberate comes on- I ALWAYS sing....."Liberate....*BA-NAN-AS*!"
> 
> What are they saying



Oh lawd.....it's "Liberate my MADNESS"


----------



## maddhatir

Just wanted to say ADIOS to you all!!!

I am leaving at 4:30 am on Sunday- not sure if I will be checking in tomorrow! Be back on Friday- however, we will be heading down the shore for Labor Day weekend! Never a moments rest!

I am all packed and my house is almost all clean and DH thinks that means- SAILING tomorrow!- I told him maybe!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Have a great time!!   Don't forget to share when you return!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Just wanted to say ADIOS to you all!!!
> 
> I am leaving at 4:30 am on Sunday- not sure if I will be checking in tomorrow! Be back on Friday- however, we will be heading down the shore for Labor Day weekend! Never a moments rest!
> 
> I am all packed and my house is almost all clean and DH thinks that means- SAILING tomorrow!- I told him maybe!



have a great trip!!! and enjoy your weekend at the shore as well!!


----------



## karebear06

We have been married for two years.  I have always wanted to have kids in the past, and I really didn't know anyone married that did not have kids.  But now, we are not sure if we want to have kids.  I would hate to have a kid, take him or her to Disney and he or she not like it.  We would then be the most horrible parents in the world going to disney and leaving the kids at home.


----------



## TKDisneylover

karebear06 said:


> We have been married for two years.  I have always wanted to have kids in the past, and I really didn't know anyone married that did not have kids.  But now, we are not sure if we want to have kids.  I would hate to have a kid, take him or her to Disney and he or she not like it.  We would then be the most horrible parents in the world going to disney and leaving the kids at home.



​


----------



## zima-cheryl

So I know folks here might relate to this.  I'm sure others of you have been in this boat probably.

We went out w/friends last night & another couple they know.  At one point the 3 of us ladies headed to the bathroom.  Once away from the boys I heard a litany of reasons their hubbys were jerks.  And then was promptly told how lucky we were we didn't have kids.  I kept quiet... since we are friends w/both him & her I didn't want to get in the middle of that.  And I didn't even know the other couple at all...

Wow!  I feel bad that things are that rough for them.  I'm glad we were able to drag them out for a few hours to toss back a few & watch the game.  
But it is times like that I really know we made the right choice.


----------



## MistyMoss

zima-cheryl said:


> So I know folks here might relate to this.  I'm sure others of you have been in this boat probably.
> 
> We went out w/friends last night & another couple they know.  At one point the 3 of us ladies headed to the bathroom.  Once away from the boys I heard a litany of reasons their hubbys were jerks.  And then was promptly told how lucky we were we didn't have kids.  I kept quiet... since we are friends w/both him & her I didn't want to get in the middle of that.  And I didn't even know the other couple at all...
> 
> Wow!  I feel bad that things are that rough for them.  I'm glad we were able to drag them out for a few hours to toss back a few & watch the game.
> But it is times like that I really know we made the right choice.



We have heard some of the same things. I know where you are coming from. I read somewhere that too many women today are picking a father for their unborn children (as in a wallet) and not picking a husband first. They might figure out the guy is a jerk if they got to know the person first and not just thinking of him as a potential father. At least none of us have to worry about that aspect.

Got a story here.....we got a thank you card the other day from a younger friend of ours that just got married. They are both 29. He said thanks for the gift card, and sharing our special day, and such. The last line I thought was sweet. He said that he hopes they are as happy as we have always been. Can you say "Awwwww"???? 

I know DH and I would have a heck of a lot more stress on our marriage with kids. As it is, we just go with the flow.


----------



## Mayhem2008

Hi Everyone! Still here just been busy because it's vet season here...that time of year when I have to take everyone to the vet for shots and check ups. Kinda like a "back to school" ritual  
Haven't been well since I came back from my trip to Boston and the doctor decided to put me on new meds for my fibro. Right now they are knocking the hell out of me but he said it should only last about 2 weeks so I'll tough it out. I only have 4 weeks until I leave for Disney so I have to be on my feet by then.
I missed saying "Have a good trip!" to Madd!! But I know she will! LOL Can't wait to hear all about it when she gets back!
Have a good day everyone!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Mayhem2008 said:


> Hi Everyone! Still here just been busy because it's vet season here...that time of year when I have to take everyone to the vet for shots and check ups. Kinda like a "back to school" ritual
> Haven't been well since I came back from my trip to Boston and the doctor decided to put me on new meds for my fibro. Right now they are knocking the hell out of me but he said it should only last about 2 weeks so I'll tough it out. I only have 4 weeks until I leave for Disney so I have to be on my feet by then.
> I missed saying "Have a good trip!" to Madd!! But I know she will! LOL Can't wait to hear all about it when she gets back!
> Have a good day everyone!



Hope you are feeling better soon.  Definately need to be better before heading to the World!  When are you going to be there?  I think you may be a week or 2 before we go if I'm counting correctly.

How many "kids" going to the vets?  We spread ours out during the year -- otherwise it hurts the wallet too much! $$  They are expensive little things, aren't they?  But worth every cent!!


----------



## Mayhem2008

zima-cheryl said:


> Hope you are feeling better soon.  Definately need to be better before heading to the World!  When are you going to be there?  I think you may be a week or 2 before we go if I'm counting correctly.
> 
> How many "kids" going to the vets?  We spread ours out during the year -- otherwise it hurts the wallet too much! $$  They are expensive little things, aren't they?  But worth every cent!!



We are leaving in 4 weeks...we'll be there from 9/27 - 10/4 and I'm really looking forward to this. It's the first vaca we have ever taken and we've been together for 12 years! (I don't count trips to visit my family back home as "vacation"  ) When are you going to be there? You must be excited to be so close to it!! I'm kind of numb right now because I have so much I need to get ready and just not feeling up to any of it. 

I have a cat and 2 dogs. All I have left is the little dog to take in in a couple of weeks. She will be the least antsy one, although the cat wasn't that bad. He had some knots on his back and he let them remove them with no problem whatsoever. Maggie, my big dog, just wanted to be back in the car with her head hanging out the window, catching the breeze. She "talked" the entire time we were there. Not barking, just making alot of mooing sounds .
This is DH's busy season at work, they work the entire month of August, no days off, anywhere from 14-16 hours a day so I take all the pets to the vet while the money is a bit more plentiful. One thing I love about our vet is that she never has a packed waiting room. They schedule one person at a time and the next person usually arrives just as the prior one is leaving. The last vet I had used to double book plus allow walkins and the waiting room would be a zoo! 

We may go to the fair this Sunday, if DH has it off and it doesn't rain. I've never been so this will be a new one for me!
Have a good Friday everyone!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Happy Friday Everyone!!!  ​

*Mayhem & Zima-cheryl*, you guys are so lucky your trips are coming up quickly!!  Have either of you started packing yet?  I don't have the suitcases out, but I do have little piles of things to be packed starting to form.  Which resorts are you each staying at? 

May, hope your feeling good for your trip.  I know a couple people with fibro and it sounds like it can get pretty painful at times.

I've been dealing with a bad foot, it's pronated (fallen arch), which puts pressure on my ankle.  I've gained some weight in last year and that's starting to affect the ankle more.  The doc took an x-ray and found out I have a broken bone in my ankle, it's an old injury that was never taken care of and is now agitated by the weight gain.  Now I'm doing a crash Atkin's diet to try to drop some weight so I do not become a part of the scooter brigade at Disney.  And I will also be going in to have new orthotics made for my shoes to lift the arch and take the pressure of the ankle bone.  Wish me luck, please!

On a lighter topic, did anyone see the news about David Duchovny (x-files, CALIFORNICATION), is being treated for a sex addiction?  He's actually gone into treatment for it.  I think his Showtime series has become more reality than just acting.  Just thought that was interesting.

Have a great day everyone!


----------



## zima-cheryl

TKDisneylover said:


> *Mayhem & Zima-cheryl*, you guys are so lucky your trips are coming up quickly!!  Have either of you started packing yet?  I don't have the suitcases out, but I do have little piles of things to be packed starting to form.  Which resorts are you each staying at?



I'm getting very excited!  I keep checking the menu for F&W and day dreaming about all the great food to sample.  Got our PFTS reservation Monday.     I'm thinking we should buy a 3rd seat for the flight home - we are going to eat so much we may need it!   

We are going to be at the Dolphin - neither DH nor I have ever stayed there & since we are focusing on Epcot it seemed as good a time as any other to try it out!  I wanted to be close, so after park close we could just stumble back w/out having to worry about driving or a bus.

Actually - before WDW we are headed over to Cooperstown NY for a weekend in September.  DH is taking me to Howe's Cavern & the Baseball Hall of Fame.  It will be nice to get away, even if it is just a quick overnight trip.  
 



TKDisneylover said:


> I've been dealing with a bad foot, it's pronated (fallen arch), which puts pressure on my ankle.  I've gained some weight in last year and that's starting to affect the ankle more.  The doc took an x-ray and found out I have a broken bone in my ankle, it's an old injury that was never taken care of and is now agitated by the weight gain.  Now I'm doing a crash Atkin's diet to try to drop some weight so I do not become a part of the scooter brigade at Disney.  And I will also be going in to have new orthotics made for my shoes to lift the arch and take the pressure of the ankle bone.  Wish me luck, please!



Are they going to do surgery to repair the break?  Or is it past the point of doing anything to fix/help it?

As far as the fallen arch - don't laugh - but have you considered yoga?  A girl in my class swears it has helped her feet.  I know it has done wonders for my bum hip!  You just need to find a good instructor who will work w/you on any specific problems you have.  

Good luck - hopefully the shoes will do the trick!


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> I'm getting very excited!  I keep checking the menu for F&W and day dreaming about all the great food to sample.  Got our PFTS reservation Monday.     I'm thinking we should buy a 3rd seat for the flight home - we are going to eat so much we may need it!
> 
> We are going to be at the Dolphin - neither DH nor I have ever stayed there & since we are focusing on Epcot it seemed as good a time as any other to try it out!  I wanted to be close, so after park close we could just stumble back w/out having to worry about driving or a bus.



I know what you mean about the F&W Fest, we really enjoyed it the last time we went.  Unfortunately I could not believe how many people were there late with their kids!  And I cannot tell you how many times we were clipped in the heels by strollers!   I think we may have made the mistake of going during a weekend evening, so this time we are planning to go mid-week hoping it will not be so crazy.  You will have to let us know how you liked the Dolphin.



> Actually - before WDW we are headed over to Cooperstown NY for a weekend in September.  DH is taking me to Howe's Cavern & the Baseball Hall of Fame.  It will be nice to get away, even if it is just a quick overnight trip.



This definitely sounds like a nice little getaway.



> Are they going to do surgery to repair the break?  Or is it past the point of doing anything to fix/help it?
> 
> As far as the fallen arch - don't laugh - but have you considered yoga?  A girl in my class swears it has helped her feet.  I know it has done wonders for my bum hip!  You just need to find a good instructor who will work w/you on any specific problems you have.
> 
> Good luck - hopefully the shoes will do the trick!



No surgery right now.  The doc was not even sure that was an option because there are major nerves and ligaments around the bone.  Removing the bone chunk could actually cause more harm, so he wants to see how these new orthotics work out.

No laughing at the yoga, I will definitely consider it.  I've started doing regular morning stretching and I think that is really helping.  Thankfully Atkin's is working for me, I've lost 2 1/2 pounds this week so I'm off to a great start and feeling really good about it.  I'm hoping to lose 20 by the time the trip comes in October.


----------



## zima-cheryl

TKDisneylover said:


> Thankfully Atkin's is working for me, I've lost 2 1/2 pounds this week so I'm off to a great start and feeling really good about it.  I'm hoping to lose 20 by the time the trip comes in October.



CONGRATS!  That is a great start.  
I know several folks who've used Atkins & had great results.  I'm sure you will too!


----------



## maddhatir

Hey everyone! I am back!

Got home yesterday about 4pm- was in bed and sleeping by 7pm! and did not wake up until 10am today!!

Speaking of some woman (and men) bad mouthing their spouses- I find that gross! I feel sorry for those people who do not know what it feels like to be happy! DH and I have been together for 28 years and I cherish every second we are together- I missed him SO much while I was away it was horrible!

I told him I do not think I could do it again! I love my neice and SIL but I am looking forward to our next adult Disney trip! Strollin' hand in hand in the parks is my favorite thing in the world!!!

May, you will have so much fun- just relax and do not try and see everything all at once- just remember, you can always go back. I finally chilled out this time- of course, The Boardwalk is a great place to chill and not worry about hurrying to the parks! We usually stay at the values and let me tell ya- No wonder we could never relax there- with all the families crawling around and the kids screaming and the food court echoing with the all yellin- you just can't wait to get as far away as possible from the resort!

I told DH our next trip- Boardwalk!

Me and SIL had our fill of champagne and chocolate martinis!!!!! Yeee haaa! 

Here is a pick of us "gals" before dinner with Cinderella- oh, and yes, the Prince came up to me while I was alone at the table JUST to be sure I was enjoying myself! I had to rub that one in to my niece But she one up-ed me when the Prince came to the table just to come and get her to dance with him! (imagine me and a 6yr old fighting over the Prince)- that's OK- he was too clean cut for MY liking- she can have him! 

(I am the blonde )


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Hey everyone! I am back!



Welcome back Madd!! 



> I told him I do not think I could do it again! I love my neice and SIL but I am looking forward to our next adult Disney trip! Strollin' hand in hand in the parks is my favorite thing in the world!!!
> 
> May, you will have so much fun- just relax and do not try and see everything all at once- just remember, you can always go back. I finally chilled out this time- of course, The Boardwalk is a great place to chill and not worry about hurrying to the parks! We usually stay at the values and let me tell ya- No wonder we could never relax there- with all the families crawling around and the kids screaming and the food court echoing with the all yellin- you just can't wait to get as far away as possible from the resort!
> 
> I told DH our next trip- Boardwalk!
> 
> Me and SIL had our fill of champagne and chocolate martinis!!!!! Yeee haaa!
> 
> Here is a pick of us "gals" before dinner with Cinderella- oh, and yes, the Prince came up to me while I was alone at the table JUST to be sure I was enjoying myself! I had to rub that one in to my niece But she one up-ed me when the Prince came to the table just to come and get her to dance with him! (imagine me and a 6yr old fighting over the Prince)- that's OK- he was too clean cut for MY liking- she can have him!
> 
> (I am the blonde )



Cute pic of the 3 of you Madd, your niece is such a cutie patootie!  Glad to hear you had a nice time with them but I'm totally understanding the WDW time with your DH only.  And how sweet of the prince to come and check on you, too bad the are so clean cut.  I say make 'em grow their hair long and put blue sunglasses on them.  Yeah, that's it, they should all look like JD!

I have to say I am not looking forward to the loudness of a value resort, but this trip is a budget trip that my best friend and I planned with our DH's just to get together for the F&W fest.  We definitely will not be at the resort that much and since we got our room for $54 a night we'll deal with it.  DH wants to stay at the Poly or Boardwalk next time.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

welcome back Madd!!! Glad y'all had such a good time!


----------



## Mayhem2008

Welcome back Madd!!! I love the picture, even though I always had the mental image that you were a borderline goth girl like me!   Sounds like you had an awesome time, which I knew you would. I would have been checking the Prince for piercings and tattoos before giving him my seal of approval.  

TK - that foot of yours sounds like sheer agony. I hope that you'll get healed up enough to enjoy your trip. Good luck on Atkins! I know it's worked for so many people and I'm sure it'll work for you too. It sounds like you are off to a really good start. 

Zima - I'm psyched about the F&W fest myself! So much booze and so little time! Oh yeah...there's food too huh? LOL I think I'll make a little sign that says "Please return to Coronado springs" on it and paste it to my shirt just in case I'm not speaking to clearly at the end of the day. 

We had a great weekend. DH got all 3 days off and it seemed like I hadn't seen him in a month, which is pretty accurate. We went shopping on Saturday. Nothing spectacular to report there. Sunday we went to the fair and you'll never believe what I had! Deep fried Oreos!   Yes they were good and the entire taste of the Oreo gets transformed by the batter and the frying but talk about feeling guilty after eating those babies! Thankfully I walked them off and didn't have anything else. Yesterday we bummed around the house, did the BBQ thing and DH got the idea that it would be fun to work on a puzzle together. We bought one with some cats on it and laid everything out...after about 2 hours I said to him "I thought you said this was supposed to be relaxing???" I was chain smoking and he was swearing so I guess the idea of relaxation went right out the window  
Housework for me today. If anyone wants to come and rescue me from it I'll be waiting.......have a good day everyone!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Mayhem2008 said:


> TK - that foot of yours sounds like sheer agony. I hope that you'll get healed up enough to enjoy your trip. Good luck on Atkins! I know it's worked for so many people and I'm sure it'll work for you too. It sounds like you are off to a really good start.



Thanks!  



> We had a great weekend. DH got all 3 days off and it seemed like I hadn't seen him in a month, which is pretty accurate. We went shopping on Saturday. Nothing spectacular to report there. Sunday we went to the fair and you'll never believe what I had! Deep fried Oreos!   Yes they were good and the entire taste of the Oreo gets transformed by the batter and the frying but talk about feeling guilty after eating those babies! Thankfully I walked them off and didn't have anything else. Yesterday we bummed around the house, did the BBQ thing and DH got the idea that it would be fun to work on a puzzle together. We bought one with some cats on it and laid everything out...after about 2 hours I said to him "I thought you said this was supposed to be relaxing???" I was chain smoking and he was swearing so I guess the idea of relaxation went right out the window
> Housework for me today. If anyone wants to come and rescue me from it I'll be waiting.......have a good day everyone!



Glad to hear that your DH did not have to work this weekend, it's so nice to be able to just relax and enjoy each other's company.

This actually reminds me of a funny story from work that a fellow coworker told me.  Someone had asked her when her & her DH were going to have kids, they've been married for 3 years now.  She said they were happy without having kids and have pretty much decided they were not having any.  The woman asks her, "but won't you get bored?"  And she was totally serious! What is this woman going to do when the kids have grown and gotten a life of their own?

Deep fried Oreos?  It amazes me how much stuff they have started deep frying!  Our fair advertised deep fried Snickers candy bars, we did not go this year so I did not have one, but that just sounds like it would be a melted mess.


----------



## Mayhem2008

TKDisneylover said:


> Thanks!
> 
> 
> 
> Glad to hear that your DH did not have to work this weekend, it's so nice to be able to just relax and enjoy each other's company.
> 
> This actually reminds me of a funny story from work that a fellow coworker told me.  Someone had asked her when her & her DH were going to have kids, they've been married for 3 years now.  She said they were happy without having kids and have pretty much decided they were not having any.  The woman asks her, "but won't you get bored?"  And she was totally serious! What is this woman going to do when the kids have grown and gotten a life of their own?
> 
> Deep fried Oreos?  It amazes me how much stuff they have started deep frying!  Our fair advertised deep fried Snickers candy bars, we did not go this year so I did not have one, but that just sounds like it would be a melted mess.



OMG  "but won't you get bored?" Can you imagine???? We are *never* bored and because we have the freedom to come and go as we please, without worrying about childcare or having to go to primarily kid-friendly places, we are constantly on the go. It's also nice to just sit on the porch and talk for hours without any interruptions. It's probably the same for most of you as well. 
As for the deep fried Oreos, all I could think of was Paula Deen when I was eating them, although she may have put some butter on them  I once saw her deep fry a stuffed baked potato! 
Doesn't Cooke's Of Dublin in DTD do deep fried Snickers? I'd try it but don't think I could get thru the sweetness overload....but if you all need someone to be a guinea pig I'll sacrifice myself in the name of science


----------



## Shyvioletisme

deep fried oreos...that's nothing...State Fair of Texas...we deep fry everything!!! lol...pretty much every candy bar, guacamole, deep friend lattes, sundaes, deep fried bacon will be new this year...lol...
but hey, what can you say...corny dogs were invented at our state fair...in Texas: "If you can dip it in batter, you can deep fry it!" lol  

I do have to say though that the deep fried guacamole and deep fried latte are both divine!!! ok, now I can't wait for the state fair to start this month!!


----------



## PhotobearSam

Madd.....LOVE that pic. You guys look so happy.

I am glad you are back.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Shyvioletisme said:


> deep fried oreos...that's nothing...State Fair of Texas...we deep fry everything!!! lol...pretty much every candy bar, guacamole, deep friend lattes, sundaes, deep fried bacon will be new this year...lol...
> but hey, what can you say...corny dogs were invented at our state fair...in Texas: "If you can dip it in batter, you can deep fry it!" lol
> 
> I do have to say though that the deep fried guacamole and deep fried latte are both divine!!! ok, now I can't wait for the state fair to start this month!!



Can you please explain to me how you deep fry a latte?  I know you said if you can dip it in batter you can fry it, but a latte is a drink.   I love corn dogs, if the Texas fair invented them then they must have started the first State Fairs, isn't the corn dog like the official food of State Fairs?


----------



## maddhatir

karebear06 said:


> We have been married for two years.  I have always wanted to have kids in the past, and I really didn't know anyone married that did not have kids.  But now, we are not sure if we want to have kids.  I would hate to have a kid, take him or her to Disney and he or she not like it.  We would then be the most horrible parents in the world going to disney and leaving the kids at home.



Welcome!!! 



TKDisneylover said:


> I've been dealing with a bad foot, it's pronated (fallen arch), which puts pressure on my ankle.  I've gained some weight in last year and that's starting to affect the ankle more.  The doc took an x-ray and found out I have a broken bone in my ankle, it's an old injury that was never taken care of and is now agitated by the weight gain.  Now I'm doing a crash Atkin's diet to try to drop some weight so I do not become a part of the scooter brigade at Disney.  And I will also be going in to have new orthotics made for my shoes to lift the arch and take the pressure of the ankle bone.  Wish me luck, please!
> 
> On a lighter topic, did anyone see the news about David Duchovny (x-files, CALIFORNICATION), is being treated for a sex addiction?  He's actually gone into treatment for it.  I think his Showtime series has become more reality than just acting.  Just thought that was interesting.
> 
> Have a great day everyone!



 I was reading your post this morning while listening to Howard- and OMG- at that exact time- he was talking about David Duchovny! Ironic! Do we really care David needs sex all the time? 

So sorry to hear about your ankle! Load up on Advil every few hours while walking around the parks. One year, before our Disney trip, I hurt my knee really bad. I was so upset b/c all I could think of was- how DARE my knee get in the way of my trip!!! Oh- and just drink a lot  People won't be able to tell if you are staggering from drinking or just injured 



zima-cheryl said:


> We are going to be at the Dolphin - neither DH nor I have ever stayed there & since we are focusing on Epcot it seemed as good a time as any other to try it out!  I wanted to be close, so after park close we could just stumble back w/out having to worry about driving or a bus.



I walked over to the Dolphin and the Swan from the Boardwalk one morning- it was SO peaceful! My SIL and niece were sleeping in and I was a little bored- so I went down to the Bakery, got my coffee and strolled on the path to the Beach and Yacht Club and then over to the Swan and Dolphin- It is SO great to be able to walk to Epcot and The Studios too! Be sure to take the path to The Studios, at night it will be a nice stroll for you and DH! Any time I can avoid the bus- It is a plus!!! I told my niece we will get shirts made up- "WE HATE THE BUS" She said, "I can't wear that for the SCHOOL bus!" I had to explain to her we will only wear them in Disney!



TKDisneylover said:


> Welcome back Madd!!
> Cute pic of the 3 of you Madd, your niece is such a cutie patootie!  Glad to hear you had a nice time with them but I'm totally understanding the WDW time with your DH only.  And how sweet of the prince to come and check on you, too bad the are so clean cut.  I say make 'em grow their hair long and put blue sunglasses on them.  Yeah, that's it, they should all look like JD!
> 
> I have to say I am not looking forward to the loudness of a value resort, but this trip is a budget trip that my best friend and I planned with our DH's just to get together for the F&W fest.  We definitely will not be at the resort that much and since we got our room for $54 a night we'll deal with it.  DH wants to stay at the Poly or Boardwalk next time.



DH and I do the values most of the time! The prices are great when you can get a code. I stayed at the Poly in the past- and honestly- I liked the Boardwalk much better. BUT, that is just me. 

Wow- speaking of JD- I just remembered! We did not even do the Pirate Tutorial! I am not into the Capt Jacks just b/c they are SUPPOSED to be JD. Some of the women act like they are at a male revue when they see those guys! I accept no imitations! 



Mayhem2008 said:


> Welcome back Madd!!! I love the picture, even though I always had the mental image that you were a borderline goth girl like me!   Sounds like you had an awesome time, which I knew you would. I would have been checking the Prince for piercings and tattoos before giving him my seal of approval.
> 
> Zima - I'm psyched about the F&W fest myself! So much booze and so little time! Oh yeah...there's food too huh? LOL I think I'll make a little sign that says "Please return to Coronado springs" on it and paste it to my shirt just in case I'm not speaking to clearly at the end of the day.



HA! Did my pic surprise you!!!!? A few Disers said the same thing! Let me tell ya- looks are deceiving! I hide behind the "almost normal" facade - but behind that- is the real me! The Queen of Death Metal Darkness and cynical as can be! 











 You can't see my eyebrow or all of my ear piercings in the pic. I would love to be goth- however, I think I mentioned this before- I don't do pale and dark hair very well!  I am a Leo- I need to be bright- I do "tan" a little better I do kind of stick out at the concerts- I toss on my Harley girlie hat and try and cover the hair.

I love the sign idea for you! I would PEE if I saw someone wearing that- and remember- try and avoid the F&W on the weekends! And if you have the meal plan, use your snack credits for the little food carts outside of each country!! 

Another suggestion- If anyone wants a good (quiet) breakfast- we did Spoodles a few times and used our TS credit. We always got right in, no ressies, and there was only a handful of people in there- we would go between 10 and 11am. 



TKDisneylover said:


> The woman asks her, "but won't you get bored?"  And she was totally serious! What is this woman going to do when the kids have grown and gotten a life of their own?



Dear GOD! BORED!!???? Being in Disney this past week has confirmed by beliefs that children are probably the #1 cause of adults having mental issues  And that is if you are a parent of said child, .....or NOT! Just being around them can cause insanity! (be sure to pack your Xanax girls! and some extras for your DH)


----------



## maddhatir

ooops- sorry I forgot to tell you all a quick story about my trip. 

We were in the AK one day and Karlee wanted to watch the parade- it was at 4pm and we were there most of the day. (I HATE parades- but, I put a zipper on it) So SIL and I pick out a spot. It was a good spot- we had some rocks to sit on- all was all good. BUT- not for Karlee! She started freaking out that she could not see b/c of the kids in front of her, and she wanted a seat. She was acting up so much that the kids in front of her were turning aorund to see what was going on. 

Well- I had it and I just yelled out "_Excuse me? Princess? Would you like me to fetch you your THRONE to sit on!? And how about some pillows to rest your head on_!!?" She was furious and just looked at me and screamed! 

At the same time- SIL and I just walked away from her- which made the situation worse! She started screaming MORE! I saw SILs face and knew it was time for me to walk away from them so she can let Karlee have it. We ended up just leaving the park and she did not get to see the parade! 

THAT was an Ativan day!


----------



## JCandKT

maddhatir said:


> Well- I had it and I just yelled out "_Excuse me? Princess? Would you like me to fetch you your THRONE to sit on!? And how about some pillows to rest your head on_!!?" She was furious and just looked at me and screamed!
> 
> At the same time- SIL and I just walked away from her- which made the situation worse! She started screaming MORE! I saw SILs face and knew it was time for me to walk away from them so she can let Karlee have it. We ended up just leaving the park and she did not get to see the parade!
> 
> THAT was an Ativan day!



Oh my Lord I just spit out my lemonade.  That's AWESOME!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I was reading your post this morning while listening to Howard- and OMG- at that exact time- he was talking about David Duchovny! Ironic! Do we really care David needs sex all the time?
> 
> So sorry to hear about your ankle! Load up on Advil every few hours while walking around the parks. One year, before our Disney trip, I hurt my knee really bad. I was so upset b/c all I could think of was- how DARE my knee get in the way of my trip!!! *Oh- and just drink a lot  People won't be able to tell if you are staggering from drinking or just injured:rotfl2*:



You totally made me laugh out loud!  You know I will be doing that, and I also have little bottles of tequila for my little purse that I bring into the parks. 

I have heard some rumblings that Mr. Duchovny's addiction may have something to do with internet porn.   

I will definitely be loading up with Advil, right now I have been eating Aleve's like candy and they do nothing for me.  Time to make the switch.



> Wow- speaking of JD- I just remembered! We did not even do the Pirate Tutorial! I am not into the Capt Jacks just b/c they are SUPPOSED to be JD. Some of the women act like they are at a male revue when they see those guys! I accept no imitations!



We did not see this on our last visit but I was hoping to see it this next time.  I have read a few trip reports that the woman writing it are so into these JD wannabes, it's weird.  I have seen two different ones and only one somewhat resembles him but why would you act like that around them, bizarre!



> Dear GOD! BORED!!???? Being in Disney this past week has confirmed by beliefs that children are probably the #1 cause of adults having mental issues  And that is if you are a parent of said child, .....or NOT! Just being around them can cause insanity! (be sure to pack your Xanax girls! and some extras for your DH)



I forgot to mention that the woman who thought the other would be bored has been open about the fact that her husband had an affair with his secretary.  He took the other woman on many trips to Vegas and skiing in Colorado.  Pays cash for his BMW's & Escalades, he's some type of broker.  She was going to divorce him but he begged her not to and promised not to see the other woman again.  She thought that because he would have to come forward about his finances they might uncover something possibly illegal going.  She just said fine and they have gone on with life as usual.  How could you trust someone after that?   



maddhatir said:


> ooops- sorry I forgot to tell you all a quick story about my trip.
> 
> We were in the AK one day and Karlee wanted to watch the parade- it was at 4pm and we were there most of the day. (I HATE parades- but, I put a zipper on it) So SIL and I pick out a spot. It was a good spot- we had some rocks to sit on- all was all good. BUT- not for Karlee! She started freaking out that she could not see b/c of the kids in front of her, and she wanted a seat. She was acting up so much that the kids in front of her were turning aorund to see what was going on.
> 
> Well- I had it and I just yelled out "_Excuse me? Princess? Would you like me to fetch you your THRONE to sit on!? And how about some pillows to rest your head on_!!?" She was furious and just looked at me and screamed!
> 
> At the same time- SIL and I just walked away from her- which made the situation worse! She started screaming MORE! I saw SILs face and knew it was time for me to walk away from them so she can let Karlee have it. We ended up just leaving the park and she did not get to see the parade!
> 
> THAT was an Ativan day!



Hopefully that was the only "little" meltdown during the trip, I think your SIL did the right thing by leaving the park with her.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> You totally made me laugh out loud!  You know I will be doing that, and I also have little bottles of tequila for my little purse that I bring into the parks.



Doesn't security see it in your purse- actually, some of them do not even check hard enough to see anything! Why even bother checking at all!? 



> I have heard some rumblings that Mr. Duchovny's addiction may have something to do with internet porn.



Yes- that is what they said on Howard- he did not cheat on Tea- it was about the internet porn, for crying out loud what country do we live in? People really need to pull the sticks out of their butts and mind their own stinking business! 



> We did not see this on our last visit but I was hoping to see it this next time.  I have read a few trip reports that the woman writing it are so into these JD wannabes, it's weird.  I have seen two different ones and only one somewhat resembles him but why would you act like that around them, bizarre!



I would be VERY interested in hearing some of the propositions those guys get! I can only imagine! I am sure one is, "no- please, keep the costume, hair and make-up ON....Capt!"   





> I forgot to mention that the woman who thought the other would be bored has been open about the fact that her husband had an affair with his secretary.  He took the other woman on many trips to Vegas and skiing in Colorado.  Pays cash for his BMW's & Escalades, he's some type of broker.  She was going to divorce him but he begged her not to and promised not to see the other woman again.  She thought that because he would have to come forward about his finances they might uncover something possibly illegal going.  She just said fine and they have gone on with life as usual.  How could you trust someone after that?



I think they should interview people before they are allowed to become parents! "Sorry- rejected"   



> Hopefully that was the only "little" meltdown during the trip, I think your SIL did the right thing by leaving the park with her.



That was the only meltdown. I do not like when people make excuses for their child's behavior- but it was so HOT and we were there all day, that is not an excuse, but I think right about that time,  I was ready to have a meltdown-

A few times I left my SIL and Karlee and went back to the room to calm myself and take a shower b/c it was so hot! It really helps to decompress in the afternoon.  

actually-  *I* had a few issues with her manners! My SIL told me she does not have a problem with me correcting Karlee, which I did a lot, but you can only go so far before you cross the line. So I did bite my tongue many times.

OH! You will all love this too!

You know how most people with kids.....like kids...... we had dinner one night at Wolfgang Puck Cafe- upstairs. It is much more snooty than downstairs and they do not take the dining plan (ugh- after we ordered we found this out) but they made the best chocolate martinis- so of course, we could not leave! anywho- No one up there had kids with them while we were eating (a family with children did come in as we were leaving)

Karlee was very well behaved when we were there- however, at one point, she wanted to look out the window that was near another table. As she was looking out the window- she was belting out a song. I just said for her to sit down b/c maybe the people eating did not want to hear her sing. 

My SIL was very surprised that I said that. I said, look- I am going to give you a lesson on childfree people and how they think! I went on to tell her when DH and I (and other childfree people) are out- this is how WE think- it is fine the kids are there and talking with their families- but we like them to stay at THEIR table and do not wish to hear them singing- having a tantrum etc. (and I am sure people WITH children feel the same way, but I would think they are more understanding in that situation! They are all in that "_been there before_" club  It is like a secret handshake of the parents- I am sure you all have seen it in Disney) 

She said really? I never even noticed kids in a restaurant even before I had kids-  I said, Well- that is what makes us different! 

I wonder if she went away with some knowledge


----------



## Shyvioletisme

TKDisneylover said:


> Can you please explain to me how you deep fry a latte?  I know you said if you can dip it in batter you can fry it, but a latte is a drink.   I love corn dogs, if the Texas fair invented them then they must have started the first State Fairs, isn't the corn dog like the official food of State Fairs?



have you ever had fried ice cream? It's kinda like that. like a deep friend pastry type situation with coffee ice cream and liqour and whip cream.


----------



## zima-cheryl

JCandKT said:


> Oh my Lord I just spit out my lemonade.  That's AWESOME!



No snorking the lemonaide please!!!


----------



## Mayhem2008

OMG all these stories are just killing me this morning!  X-files have now become XXX-files, Capt Jack is stripping and taking extra business on the side, secretaries and bosses sneaking off for vaca...and Madd's niece providing entertainment for the folks at Wolfgang's  I have nothing to add whatsoever except for the "No snorking the lemonade please" comment did me in


----------



## TKDisneylover

Shyvioletisme said:


> have you ever had fried ice cream? It's kinda like that. like a deep friend pastry type situation with coffee ice cream and liqour and whip cream.



Oh that sounds really good!  I do like fried ice cream, and then they add the coffee flavor, liquor & whip cream, that's even better!  Talk about a carb overload....

Thanks Tiffany, if I ever make it to Texas I will be sure there is a State Fair going on while I'm visiting.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> No snorking the lemonaide please!!!



 I thought you said.....
 no *snorkeling* in your lemonade!


----------



## maddhatir

BTW- I have also tried a fried Oreo af ew years ago- I was not crazy about it- however, I believe you should always try something TWICE just to be sure it is or is not for you 

I have to go and try another one!


----------



## Bushmills

I think if we could only figure out the enigma that is "fried jello shooters", we'd have a profitable and tasty market niche cornered!


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> I think if we could only figure out the enigma that is "fried jello shooters", we'd have a profitable and tasty market niche cornered!




But! Would there "always be room for _fried _jello?"


----------



## Bushmills

Absolutely!  Or maybe we could change the slogan to "get fried and have jello!"


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> Absolutely!  Or maybe we could change the slogan to "get fried and have jello!"



I likey the "fried" part!


----------



## Bushmills

maddhatir said:


> I likey the "fried" part!



Though I suppose we'd have to use green jello?


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> Though I suppose we'd have to use green jello?



 I have a feeling we have totally forgotten all about jello!


----------



## Bushmills

maddhatir said:


> I have a feeling we have totally forgotten all about jello!



Oh wait, what?  We were talking about jello?  Who says it kills synapse activity?  Who says it kills synapse activity?  Wait, I already said that.


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> Oh wait, what?  We were talking about jello?  Who says it kills synapse activity?  Who says it kills synapse activity?  Wait, I already said that.




.......what?.........


----------



## Bushmills

LOL, please disregard - pathetic attempt at an inside joke.  Today is one of those days where, try as I might, I just can't be productive at work.  Instead, I'm compelled to browse these boards in search of Disney pictures, and wishing I was there.  ADD I suppose.


----------



## maddhatir

I know what you mean! After getting back from Disney last friday- I went into a long (Labor day) weekend and now I just can't get into work!

I have got to buckle down!! 

But good news- it is almost Friday! 

Hoping to go to the "Roar to the Shore" this weekend- it is this awesome cycle rally that we go to every year in Wildwood NJ- there are usually 100,000+ bikes! Ahhh- to feel at home! 

But it seems like the guys riding cycles anymore are just a bunch of $#@&^ bags- I like the old time Harley dudes, they are some of the sweetest guys around- but, I think they are becoming a rare breed! 

It has gotten so bad with the "new riders" that I would prefer to hang out with the darn Warlocks than some of the punks that ride anymore  I think the Warlocks are much more polite!  Is that possible?


----------



## Bushmills

I agree 100% - seems that the only people who can afford the bikes, insurance and maintenance are the stuffy white collared, weekend warrior, yeah I'm dangerous on my brand new Harley, doctor and lawyer types.  I too find it MUCH easier to talk to / have fun with the true archtypal "biker" - never had a problem with them.  The bike rally you describe sounds like a lot of fun, and I'm envious of your Disney trip!  You must have had a blast even with this weather.


----------



## maddhatir

Yeah- the Docs etc (oh- be sure to add the cigar in the mouth!  ) are not my "cup of tea", but I can deal with them alittle. My DH is a good ole' blue collared mechanic and kind of fits nicely on a Harley! He talks about getting a new bike and I tell him "no way!" He has a 2001 Harley, his very first bike. It is a Road King Classic, w/ soft bags- It is nice and worn (his boots are beat up, his cycle jacket is about 20 years old, his helmet is beat up) and I LIKE that! Only the weekend warriors buy a "shiney, new bike" every year...... WHO CARES!

BUT actually-  the riders I am talking about, are the loud, obnoxious younger guys! Mostly the one's with the custom bikes. They are J#@% offs in real life anyway- just sit them on a bike and forget about it! Have you seen those guys? I think with the success of Jesse James years ago, it has created a new breed of bikers that I call "punks" 

When you go to the rallys- you see the old timers and gangs , the white collar guys, and the punks and they are never together. DH does not like me walking around the gangs, like the Warlocks etc, but honestly, as a female, I feel more threatened and uncomfortable around the obnoxious punks!  

Tonight that new FX show, "Sons of Anarchy" is starting! I have to catch it! 10PM!


----------



## Bushmills

Nice - sounds like hubby has a nice bike!  I agree - most of my leisure clothes are worn, tattered, old, and VERY comfortable.  Having to wear suits and khakis (sp?) all week makes me want to "bum" around all weekend.

Ah yes, the young 'uns -  I know exactly what you mean.  They all try so very hard to be cool, but it is a bit laughable really.  Every time I see them I'm reminded of a Dennis Miller line in the second Tales From The Crypt movie, where he tells a kid in a pool hall "you couldn't possibly get any cooler, could you?".  They have the look, the bike, the clothes, and very wealthy parents.  By the way, they hate it when you laugh at them.

I'm still kicking myself - I used to ride a 1984 Yamaha Seca Turbo (remember the turbo bikes of the glorious '80's??).  It wasn't a sport bike, somewhat of a cruiser, definately not a crotch rocket.  Was fun and went like stink, and was all I could afford.  Sold the bike in my early 20's, let my bike license expire, and now thanks to the uber conservative gov't here in Canada, I have to get a graduated license if I want to ride again.  Ah well, my wife and I are planning a move to Florida next year and will  get my license through the good ol' Florida DMV.  Would love to then either rebuild an old Harley or possibly an Indian. Do you ride?


----------



## maddhatir

I can ride- I do have my license, I took the safety course and I used to ride dirt bikes when I was younger. 

I am just a little scared to be out there on the road with the idiots and the bikes seem so heavy and I know that is not an issue while you are actually moving, but it is the stopping and holding it up that scares me I like to chill out on the back of DHs bike and enjoy the scenery. I keep my license up to date just in case though. 


I am sure DH would know the bike you are talking about.

I LOVE Indians! I like the way the fender cuts across the wheel- Harleys and Indians are my 2 favorite bikes! But the Indian has to be the one with the longer fender. I think they are making some now that you cannot even tell it is an Indian I say, why bother- 

BTW- I am very good at laughing at people to make them feel like idiots  Maybe I can try that this weekend!? I have also said the famous,  "wow- you are just too cool"   to some people that like to show off, I guess I can throw that in too!

Wow- if you are moving to FL- not sure of the area- you can do the Biketoberfest in Dayton in Oct! DH and I have been there a few times. We rented a Harley one year in Orlando and would go between Disney and Daytona for the week. 

I would never do Bike Week in Daytona- too many crotch rockets and kids!- Biketoberfest is more of an older crowd and cruiser bikes!


----------



## Bushmills

I hear you - that's my wife's concern as well.  She doesn't like the weight of the bikes, but as I tell her, it's only a concern if she tips it and no ones' around to help pull it up.

I agree - the classic Indians are the best, so much style.  All bikes tend to look alike now for some reason.  

Biketober fest??  Haven't heard of that, but will definately do some reading!  We're planning on the central Florida area (where else??), and Daytona is only an hour away, and a nice bike ride at that.  There's only one thing we're dreading about moving down there.

Can't wait to get our kids down there though (2 dogs, 2 cats, all 4 completely insane).  When are you guys going down next?


----------



## maddhatir

Here is the link to Biketoberfest!
http://www.biketoberfest.org/

Ugh- DH dumped his bike a few years back- it felt like slow-mo! It was so weird, we were in a parking lot and he was turning around, he knows what happened, the turn was sharp and he was going wayyyy too slow, the bike just kind of ....fell over. I did a swan dive off the bike b/c I knew it was going down. 

What was embarrassing, was, we were at one of the dealerships hanging out b/c they were having an open house with 100s of bikes and food-  I wanted to just get up after the dive and do a bow and a  "taaaa-daaaa" 

Just be careful riding down that stinking I4 (I think that is what it is called)-  it seems like that highway is a death trap- you can be cruising along and then BAM! Traffic comes to a dead stop! And people in FL like to ride RIGHT on your butt! We drove to FL a few times and we thought it was just a coincidence the first time- but each time after that- it was the same People do not do that very often in NJ and if they do- I usually hit my brakes and scare the crap out of them 

I am not sure when we will be going back to Disney- my DH is NOT a big Disney fan- he goes for me. But I have been talking up the Boardwalk telling him how relaxing it is just hoping he might change his mind! I have the "wheels in motion"! It may take a year, but they are rolling.......slowly.......


----------



## TKDisneylover

Bushmills said:


> Though I suppose we'd have to use green jello?



Me thinks it's time to make some absinthe "jello" shots. *(Madd, is there such a thing as vegan jello?)*  Now that I am doing Atkins I cannot "louche" my absinthe so I started drinking it over ice with Sprite Zero, it's very good that way!



maddhatir said:


> Hoping to go to the "Roar to the Shore" this weekend- it is this awesome cycle rally that we go to every year in Wildwood NJ- there are usually 100,000+ bikes! Ahhh- to feel at home!
> 
> But it seems like the guys riding cycles anymore are just a bunch of $#@&^ bags- I like the old time Harley dudes, they are some of the sweetest guys around- but, I think they are becoming a rare breed!





Bushmills said:


> I agree 100% - seems that the only people who can afford the bikes, insurance and maintenance are the stuffy white collared, weekend warrior, yeah I'm dangerous on my brand new Harley, doctor and lawyer types.  I too find it MUCH easier to talk to / have fun with the true archtypal "biker" - never had a problem with them.  The bike rally you describe sounds like a lot of fun, and I'm envious of your Disney trip!  You must have had a blast even with this weather.



You guys missed it Labor Day weekend here in good ol' Wisconsin.  We had the Harley 150th Anniversary and big stuff going on in both Milwaukee and my hometown, Waukesha.  There were over 150,000 bikers coming in from out of town.  They were your good ol' true bikers like you guys were discussing, very down to earth, and friendly people.  It was a total success bringing money into our little city with music by Blues Travelers, Foghat, Los Lobos, The Guess Who, Montgomery Gentry, Mitch Ryder and the BoDeans.  DH & are were at our favorite local mexican restaurant and were able to see the Los Lobos boys come in for dinner.  Very cool dudes and friendly to us little people.  Milwaukee had some bigger names, one being the Boss Bruce Springsteen.  DH & I hung low at home and listened to the roar of bikes coming into town all weekend (we live about 2 blocks from a country highway that gets lots of bikers coming through).


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Me thinks it's time to make some absinthe "jello" shots. *(Madd, is there such a thing as vegan jello?)*  Now that I am doing Atkins I cannot "louche" my absinthe so I started drinking it over ice with Sprite Zero, it's very good that way!



Nope- no vegan jello! I do not eat it or "drink" it! 

I had to make a change too- DH was putting half and half in my chocolate martinis! I had to put a stop to that last night and got 2% milk- it is not that bad! I can deal! 





> You guys missed it Labor Day weekend here in good ol' Wisconsin.  We had the Harley 150th Anniversary and big stuff going on in both Milwaukee and my hometown, Waukesha.  There were over 150,000 bikers coming in from out of town.  They were your good ol' true bikers like you guys were discussing, very down to earth, and friendly people.  It was a total success bringing money into our little city with music by Blues Travelers, Foghat, Los Lobos, The Guess Who, Montgomery Gentry, Mitch Ryder and the BoDeans.  DH & are were at our favorite local mexican restaurant and were able to see the Los Lobos boys come in for dinner.  Very cool dudes and friendly to us little people.  Milwaukee had some bigger names, one being the Boss Bruce Springsteen.  DH & I hung low at home and listened to the roar of bikes coming into town all weekend (we live about 2 blocks from a country highway that gets lots of bikers coming through).



Sounds fun! Did you go and checkout some of the fun?! 

I am sorry- NJ lays claim to The Boss! Don't ever let Artie Lang from Howard Stern hear you say The Boss is from Wisconsin! ....or, does he live there now? I was never a fan- I just always know NJ _owns_ Bon Jovi and Bruce! 

Hey you- have been ghost hunting lately??? Have you been on the Ghost Hunters thread?? I have not stopped by in a long time!

I am trying to talk DH into doing a few days in Savannah in the fall!!!! I told him I would get together a "proposal" and present it it him  We really loved it when we went a few years ago- it is beautiful!


----------



## Bushmills

Did I hear "Savannah"??  I LOVE that city - second only to central Florida!  DId you do the ghost tours?  They're fun, and let you take cocktails with you.  In Savannah, a pub crawl is LITERALLY a pub crawl.


----------



## maddhatir

We did not do the ghost tour there- we only stopped over for one night and part of the next day on our way to Charleston- that is where we did the ghost tour. 

I will certainly do one this time- both DH and I WANT to see Bonaventure!!! I will NOT leave without seeing it this time! I want to stay about 4 days. 

I have to find some haunted B&Bs to stay in too!


----------



## Bushmills

Nice - hope you guys have a great time!  Some day we want to spend the night in Lizzie Borden's house - it's now a B&B and you can actually stay in the murder rooms.  Personally, I'm not a believer, but it's fun nonetheless.


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Sounds fun! Did you go and checkout some of the fun?!



Nope, just hung around home on the new deck. 



> I am sorry- NJ lays claim to The Boss! Don't ever let Artie Lang from Howard Stern hear you say The Boss is from Wisconsin! ....or, does he live there now? I was never a fan- I just always know NJ _owns_ Bon Jovi and Bruce!



No I did not say he is "from" Wisconsin, I said he "played" here for the Harley events this weekend.  He was the big ticket performer in Milwaukee.



> Hey you- have been ghost hunting lately??? Have you been on the Ghost Hunters thread?? I have not stopped by in a long time!



No ghost hunting yet, DH and I have been spending every weekend since the deck was completed drinking it up and enjoying the nature and good weather around us.  The kids went back to school this week, that means fall will soon be upon us.  We did try to do some EVP work in our house but we got nothin'!

No stopping by the ghost hunters thread, IMHO they tell too many stories and their very biased about Ghost Hunters International.  Too boring for me.



> I am trying to talk DH into doing a few days in Savannah in the fall!!!! I told him I would get together a "proposal" and present it it him  We really loved it when we went a few years ago- it is beautiful!



Good luck with that, it sounds nice.  I would love to get DH there, but it will have to wait another year.  Disney in October and many home improvements this summer have tapped out the budget.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> No I did not say he is "from" Wisconsin, I said he "played" here for the Harley events this weekend.  He was the big ticket performer in Milwaukee.
> 
> No ghost hunting yet, DH and I have been spending every weekend since the deck was completed drinking it up and enjoying the nature and good weather around us.  The kids went back to school this week, that means fall will soon be upon us.  We did try to do some EVP work in our house but we got nothin'!
> 
> No stopping by the ghost hunters thread, IMHO they tell too many stories and their very biased about Ghost Hunters International.  Too boring for me.
> 
> Good luck with that, it sounds nice.  I would love to get DH there, but it will have to wait another year.  Disney in October and many home improvements this summer have tapped out the budget.



I know some people would get all "bunged up" about the Boss thing! I never got into his music- but then again- I want to move from Jersey 

I would much rather be going to Disney in Oct than Savannah! You will have an AWESOME time! Like I said- I am working on DH! 

A friend of mine just asked me yesterday if I wanted to do a "girls trip to Disney- a real girls trip- all adults I said, man- the budget! But she said, not until next year and she can use your Carnival Cruise Line credits for a place in Disney- not sure where- but I told her I might change my mind by next year- she wanted me to be their "official tour guide"

I think GH is a pretty lame show- but for some reason I KEEP on watchin'! I think I am just waiting for that one show to blow my mind! I am still waiting for my own personal story to happen! Be sure to tell me if you get an EVP!!!!! I would love to hear about it! eeeek-! hopefully you do not hear a "growl"!!!! 

Everytime DH goes through the DVR, he will say- do you want to keep GH?- I say YES! and then I watch it and complain the whole time


----------



## maddhatir

Oh Tammy! I forgot to ask you, not sure if you get HBO- if you do- are you going to start watching _True Blood_???

Vampires.......... I love vampires!!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> Nice - hope you guys have a great time!  Some day we want to spend the night in Lizzie Borden's house - it's now a B&B and you can actually stay in the murder rooms.  Personally, I'm not a believer, but it's fun nonetheless.



Not sure if I would want to do that- I like an Inn or B&B that is haunted more than ........ bizarre!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Oh Tammy! I forgot to ask you, not sure if you get HBO- if you do- are you going to start watching _True Blood_???
> 
> Vampires.......... I love vampires!!!!



I just saw the ad for it tonight and thought what a great series this is gonna be!  We have Movie channel & Showtime, so I asked DH if it would be a problem to switch to HBO and he said, not at all.  Bye bye Movie channel, hello H-B-O!  SWEET!!!   My neck is tingling just thinking about it!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I just saw the ad for it tonight and thought what a great series this is gonna be!  We have Movie channel & Showtime, so I asked DH if it would be a problem to switch to HBO and he said, not at all.  Bye bye Movie channel, hello H-B-O!  SWEET!!!   My neck is tingling just thinking about it!



  Your neck is tingling! *chomp chomp* I hope the show is good! 

We have had HBO since The Sopranos, Sex and the City and Six Feet Under. We then got hooked on Entourage- and now True Blood! How can we get rid of it now!

We also have Showtime- we LOVE Dexter- of course! WEEDS!!!, and Californiacation is pretty good too! At first I was not too crazy about it- but I got into it after a while.


----------



## MistyMoss

maddhatir said:


> Oh Tammy! I forgot to ask you, not sure if you get HBO- if you do- are you going to start watching _True Blood_???
> 
> Vampires.......... I love vampires!!!!



Oooohhhh, Oooohhhh, me, me, I am going to tape it!!!! I love my vampires. (Next to my aliens, they are my favorites) 

Madd: Glad you had a good time on vacation. The pic looked great. Is your niece still a wench in training????

For anyone wanting a haunted stay: check out this website. You just pick from your state (or the state you want) and it has all the places. I have it set up for my state of Missouri.

http://www.allstays.com/Haunted/mo-missouri-haunted-hotels.htm 

Our most famous haunted place to stay in St. Louis is the Lemp Mansion. Here is a link to it: http://www.lempmansion.com/

We are only days away from our Alaskan cruise!!! I can hardly stand the wait.


----------



## maddhatir

MistyMoss said:


> Oooohhhh, Oooohhhh, me, me, I am going to tape it!!!! I love my vampires. (Next to my aliens, they are my favorites)
> 
> Madd: Glad you had a good time on vacation. The pic looked great. Is your niece still a wench in training????
> 
> For anyone wanting a haunted stay: check out this website. You just pick from your state (or the state you want) and it has all the places. I have it set up for my state of Missouri.
> 
> http://www.allstays.com/Haunted/mo-missouri-haunted-hotels.htm
> 
> Our most famous haunted place to stay in St. Louis is the Lemp Mansion. Here is a link to it: http://www.lempmansion.com/
> 
> We are only days away from our Alaskan cruise!!! I can hardly stand the wait.



Yes! We love our vampires! Maybe this show can hold us over until JD gets his butt movin' and making Dark Shadows! 

NOT too sure if my niece is a WIW- she needs to find some manners before she can hang with us big girl wenches! You know the Capt likes us to mind our Ps and Qs......or is that HIS Ps and Qs  

Thanks for Haunted Inn site! I will check around and see what they have!

Make sure you bring us back some pics of your cruise! Bon Voyag-ie and have fun!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

I plan on watching True Blood as well...I haven't read any of Charlaine Harris' books, but one of my best friends loves them and I love most of the other sci-fi/fantasy/horror stuff that she does..so I need to get on reading the books and then enjoying the show!!


----------



## MistyMoss

maddhatir said:


> Yes! We love our vampires! Maybe this show can hold us over until JD gets his butt movin' and making Dark Shadows!
> 
> NOT too sure if my niece is a WIW- she needs to find some manners before she can hang with us big girl wenches! You know the Capt likes us to mind our Ps and Qs......*or is that HIS Ps and Qs*
> 
> Thanks for Haunted Inn site! I will check around and see what they have!
> 
> Make sure you bring us back some pics of your cruise! Bon Voyag-ie and have fun!



I'm going to go with HIS Ps and Qs!!! 

We still have 10 days to go before our cruise. I will still be hanging with you guys until the 13th.

St. Louis is pretty famous for alot of haunted places. We even have haunted underground caves!! Check out this website: http://www.prairieghosts.com/stlouis.html


----------



## MistyMoss

TKDisneylover said:


> I just saw the ad for it tonight and thought what a great series this is gonna be!  We have Movie channel & Showtime, so I asked DH if it would be a problem to switch to HBO and he said, not at all.  Bye bye Movie channel, hello H-B-O!  SWEET!!!   My neck is tingling just thinking about it!



Looks like there will be a few of us whose necks will be tingling!!


----------



## Mayhem2008

*I can't keep up with ya'll! LOL Now you went and got fried without me and are doing vampires again..geez! I gotta hang on this thread more often!
Actually, yesterday my folks surprised me with a visit!   They drove 525 miles just to spend a few hours with me and it really made my day, week, month etc. I miss them so much. I'll be seeing them again in 3 weeks, when we go to NY to drop off the dog and leave for Disney.
Here's a little something for you vampy women..




I'm off for the 30 mile drive into town to pick up a few things..have a good day everyone!*


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> *I can't keep up with ya'll! LOL Now you went and got fried without me and are doing vampires again..geez! I gotta hang on this thread more often!
> Actually, yesterday my folks surprised me with a visit!   They drove 525 miles just to spend a few hours with me and it really made my day, week, month etc. I miss them so much. I'll be seeing them again in 3 weeks, when we go to NY to drop off the dog and leave for Disney.
> Here's a little something for you vampy women..
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I'm off for the 30 mile drive into town to pick up a few things..have a good day everyone!*



That is great your parents came for a visit! Seems like it was a real pick me up for you!

I love that kitty pic! and the flying kitty in your sig is new- I love it!.....

It is almost "our" time of the year! I should start decorating for Halloween in a few weeks! I got SO much stuff after Halloween at The Spirit Halloween store! Heck they even sent me an e-mail a few weeks back reminding me to get a move on it and start buying more! 

The day after Halloween last year, they had their big sale- I went armed- I had my big pull cart that I use at flea markets! Even that would not hold all the spooky treasures I picked up @ 75% off! There was a line in front of the store before it opened- and I rolled up with my cart- EVERYONE was jealous! 

OK- went off a little there- Happy Thursday!


----------



## TKDisneylover

MistyMoss said:


> http://www.allstays.com/Haunted/mo-missouri-haunted-hotels.htm
> 
> We are only days away from our Alaskan cruise!!! I can hardly stand the wait.



That's a good website, unfortunately it only shows 1 haunted hotel in Wisconsin.

Yay for the cruise!   Have a wonderful time!



Mayhem2008 said:


> *I can't keep up with ya'll! LOL Now you went and got fried without me and are doing vampires again..geez! I gotta hang on this thread more often!
> Actually, yesterday my folks surprised me with a visit!   They drove 525 miles just to spend a few hours with me and it really made my day, week, month etc. I miss them so much. I'll be seeing them again in 3 weeks, when we go to NY to drop off the dog and leave for Disney.
> Here's a little something for you vampy women..
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I'm off for the 30 mile drive into town to pick up a few things..have a good day everyone!*



May, glad to hear the parents were in town, it's always great to see them especially when they live so far away.  Disney in 3 weeks 

I also like your little vampire kitties! 



MistyMoss said:


> Looks like there will be a few of us whose necks will be tingling!!



Believe it or not I had a dream last night about a very handsome vampire biting my neck.  It was soooo real!  It really sucked (no pun intended!) when I woke up and realized it was just a dream! 

I am a big Halloween lover too!  I have way too many boxes in storage that need to be pulled out to decorate.  I always spend the last weekend in September decorating the entire house and then I can enjoy the decorations the entire month.

We return from Disney on the 30th, so I told DH that we are doing some EVP work in the cool little cemetary we found near my sister's home on Halloween night when the veil is the thinnest between the living and the dead.  I cannot wait!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> We return from Disney on the 30th, so I told DH that we are doing some EVP work in the cool little cemetary we found near my sister's home on Halloween night when the veil is the thinnest between the living and the dead.  I cannot wait!



All Hallows Eve Maybe you should try and record at....dead time!


----------



## Mayhem2008

You guys are going to get the biggest laugh outta me. I'm not into Halloween much, I never was even as a kid. But the thing I do love is that they play all the "Halloween" series of movies over and over again, all month. Well, I like to stay up late and watch them but then when I have to go to bed I have to walk to the other end of the house, past a few windows and the minute I get near them I dart past, because I'm sure a hand is gonna come thru it and get me  I dive into bed, laughing at myself but shaky nonetheless even though I must have seen those movies about 100 times. I just can't help myself!  It's become the yearly ritual and now DH (who goes to bed earlier than me) will say "what time will you be jumping into bed tonight? I want to be prepared!"  
My day so far has not been a good one. On the way to town the traffic was backed up for construction and I was nearly rear-ended by a guy who was too busy playing with something in his truck to pay attention to the fact that we were all stopped. He came to a screeching halt just inches from my bumper...or should I say DH's bumper, because I had his SUV today. (3 out 4 speakers are blown in my car and i wanted to be able to hear the new album by Slipknot without all that distortion ) I was already not feeling real hot, very shaky and kind of out of it and that made it worse. 
When I got home I just kicked back and played on the computer for a while, relaxing and waiting for my meds to kick in. Why the hell am I having so much trouble with anxiety right now. I should be on top of the world!  
Time to go tackle the laundry and marinate the chicken. Exciting life I lead, huh? LOL


----------



## maddhatir

Not into Halloween!? That is blasphemy!!! Especially for a goth-girl like you!!! I guess everyday is Halloween for you! 

Halloween is my FAVORITE holiday! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Last year I pretty much skipped right over xmas- I did not even put up a tree! I am so tired of xmas and all the BS that goes along with it. 

If I had my way- I would hibernate in the house xmas eve and xmas day and watch TV!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Mayhem2008 said:


> You guys are going to get the biggest laugh outta me. I'm not into Halloween much, I never was even as a kid. But the thing I do love is that they play all the "Halloween" series of movies over and over again, all month. Well, I like to stay up late and watch them but then when I have to go to bed I have to walk to the other end of the house, past a few windows and the minute I get near them I dart past, because I'm sure a hand is gonna come thru it and get me  I dive into bed, laughing at myself but shaky nonetheless even though I must have seen those movies about 100 times. I just can't help myself!  It's become the yearly ritual and now DH (who goes to bed earlier than me) will say "what time will you be jumping into bed tonight? I want to be prepared!"



I have to admit that I can be bit skittish too after a good horror flick.  Wait, what the heck am I saying, I *am* skittish no matter what!  I was home the other afternoon and something had fallen in another room, I jumped and thought my heart skipped a beat.   But I still love watching them and I'm not afraid to be in a cemetary at night. 



> My day so far has not been a good one. On the way to town the traffic was backed up for construction and I was nearly rear-ended by a guy who was too busy playing with something in his truck to pay attention to the fact that we were all stopped. He came to a screeching halt just inches from my bumper...or should I say DH's bumper, because I had his SUV today. (3 out 4 speakers are blown in my car and i wanted to be able to hear the new album by Slipknot without all that distortion ) I was already not feeling real hot, very shaky and kind of out of it and that made it worse.



Sorry to hear about the jack*ss not paying attention to the road, he was probably texting or something with his cell phone!  I hate people on cell phones in cars!!!   Either drive or talk, pick one!



> When I got home I just kicked back and played on the computer for a while, relaxing and waiting for my meds to kick in. Why the hell am I having so much trouble with anxiety right now. I should be on top of the world!  Time to go tackle the laundry and marinate the chicken. Exciting life I lead, huh? LOL



Your just excited about your Disney trip, it's just coming through as anxiety right now.  That's how I get, I'm always worried about getting the house clean, making sure the dog is taken care of (and will she be okay cuz she's an old fart), and that particular anxiety doesn't go away until I reach Disney and start letting it go.  And then there is the decision of what to pack, what did I forget to pack, and just in general did I forget anything.

Hang in there, I hope your day gets better. 
You could always pop in a horror flick and really take your mind off things!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Last year I pretty much skipped right over xmas- I did not even put up a tree! I am so tired of xmas and all the BS that goes along with it.
> 
> If I had my way- I would hibernate in the house xmas eve and xmas day and watch TV!



I know exactly what you mean!  I will admit that I enjoy decorating with snowmen & putting up a tree (we do go out and cut down a real one).  But the whole religious thing is just not me, not to mention I believe in an earth based religion (hence cutting down the real tree as it was a pagen ritual before a Christian one).  The decorating that I do is more for the family (not me or DH), who come over to celebrate/party.  And as it is it's just a reason to get together because we have not seen each other since the summertime.  There are no prayers or discussion of anything religious, everyone eats, drinks (a lot), and the great nieces & nephews open presents.  DH and I keep discussing the possibility of skipping over it all together and taking a vacation over xmas one of these years.  I'm still working on that one.


----------



## maddhatir

Well girls- IF this makes you feel any better- I have anxiety EVERY DARN DAY OF MY LIFE! I stinkin' work from home and do not have many worries! ..... I am just a neurotic freak! 

Not sure if I mentioned this here before- But DH always said when he got a sailboat he would name it after me. So he had me going all summer that he was not sure what to name the boat- of course I got all huffy  b/c the boat was not going to be named after me like he promised.

I said FINE! If you do not want to actually PUT my name on the boat- just name it *NEUROTIC*! and it will secretly be named after me w/o actually putting my name on the darn thing!

He looks at me with his "smirk" and says- I NEVER said I was not going to name the boat after you- YOU said I was not going to name the boat after you-  argh! men! He thinks it is funny that I torture MYSELF! 

I need my meds just telling the story! 

Talking about skittish! You guys reminded me of this- One time DH was in the kitchen putting his dinner on his plate- we heard this loud "crash" in the bedroom that we use as a closet- He went RUNNING! into the bedroom with the plate of food in his hand!  I was FREAKIN' peeing! I said to him- "and just WHAT were you going to do with that plate of food?!"  He said he was going to smash it in someones face if they were in there!!!!! 

OMG I am peeing just picturing him running into the bedroom like a nut!   

BTW- It was one of the racks we have screwed into the wall that fell- ummm- yeah- I have too many clothes!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I know exactly what you mean!  I will admit that I enjoy decorating with snowmen & putting up a tree (we do go out and cut down a real one).  But the whole religious thing is just not me, not to mention I believe in an earth based religion (hence cutting down the real tree as it was a pagen ritual before a Christian one).  The decorating that I do is more for the family (not me or DH), who come over to celebrate/party.  And as it is it's just a reason to get together because we have not seen each other since the summertime.  There are no prayers or discussion of anything religious, everyone eats, drinks (a lot), and the great nieces & nephews open presents.  DH and I keep discussing the possibility of skipping over it all together and taking a vacation over xmas one of these years.  I'm still working on that one.



ITA !!!!! Heck- I would not even be able to cut down a tree for xmas without crying! When DH was buliding his stupid pole barn we had to cut down a few trees and I felt SO guilty! It really bothered me for a long time! 

I will not even get rid of a plant until I know I tired everything I could to save it 

I also believe in the "earth based religion" (funny how the christians lay claim to most pagan holidays- ....but with their own twist )  .....and then call us evil! 

Oh- never argue politics or religion- (b/c I am always right)  

I had to throw my bumper sticker back into my back window again in time for the election- "The last time we mixed politics and religion, people were burned at the stake"!!!!! 

Hey Tammy- have you been over to the Godless Heathens support thread?? I know Shyvioletisme is over there! I only lurk.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Not into Halloween!? That is blasphemy!!! Especially for a goth-girl like you!!! I guess everyday is Halloween for you!
> 
> Halloween is my FAVORITE holiday!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Last year I pretty much skipped right over xmas- I did not even put up a tree! I am so tired of xmas and all the BS that goes along with it.
> 
> If I had my way- I would hibernate in the house xmas eve and xmas day and watch TV!




me too!! we are very into Halloween in our house!  I haven't even put up a christmas tree in several years...oh wait...last year I put up 2 itty bitty black trees on our mantle.. do those count as christmas trees?? lol (then again seeing as we don't celebrate it as a religious holiday, I guess it doesn't really matter what we do!)


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> me too!! we are very into Halloween in our house!  I haven't even put up a christmas tree in several years...oh wait...last year I put up 2 itty bitty black trees on our mantle.. do those count as christmas trees?? lol



They count if YOU say they do!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I will not even get rid of a plant until I know I tired everything I could to save it



This is so me too.  I am the person in the office who everyone brings their dying plants to because I "typically" can bring them back to life.  There is a conference room next to my office that is slowly becoming a jungle because people know that's where I put all the "foster" plants.  True story, one day(like 5 years ago) as I walking down the hallway leaving work for the day I had noticed someone had put a plant (Norfolk pine) in a garbage can outside of their office for the cleaning people to toss.  I quickly took it out of the garbage and put it in the conference room where it is still living happily today.



> I also believe in the "earth based religion" (funny how the christians lay claim to most pagan holidays- ....but with their own twist )  .....and then call us evil!



Great minds think alike! 



> Hey Tammy- have you been over to the Godless Heathens support thread?? I know Shyvioletisme is over there! I only lurk.



I have lurked over there occasionally.



Shyvioletisme said:


> me too!! we are very into Halloween in our house!  I haven't even put up a christmas tree in several years...oh wait...last year I put up 2 itty bitty black trees on our mantle.. do those count as christmas trees?? lol (then again seeing as we don't celebrate it as a religious holiday, I guess it doesn't really matter what we do!)



Like Madd said, it counts if you say so!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> This is so me too.  I am the person in the office who everyone brings their dying plants to because I "typically" can bring them back to life.  There is a conference room next to my office that is slowly becoming a jungle because people know that's where I put all the "foster" plants.  True story, one day(like 5 years ago) as I walking down the hallway leaving work for the day I had noticed someone had put a plant (Norfolk pine) in a garbage can outside of their office for the cleaning people to toss.  I quickly took it out of the garbage and put it in the conference room where it is still living happily today.



ME TOO! I am the plant foster parent! When in doubt, just cut it back!


----------



## zima-cheryl

Mayhem2008 said:


> When I got home I just kicked back and played on the computer for a while, relaxing and waiting for my meds to kick in. Why the hell am I having so much trouble with anxiety right now. I should be on top of the world!
> Time to go tackle the laundry and marinate the chicken. Exciting life I lead, huh? LOL





TKDisneylover said:


> Your just excited about your Disney trip, it's just coming through as anxiety right now.  That's how I get, I'm always worried about getting the house clean, making sure the dog is taken care of (and will she be okay cuz she's an old fart), and that particular anxiety doesn't go away until I reach Disney and start letting it go.  And then there is the decision of what to pack, what did I forget to pack, and just in general did I forget anything.
> 
> Hang in there, I hope your day gets better.
> You could always pop in a horror flick and really take your mind off things!



I bet you 2 are type A, borderline OCD too; aren't you?   

I get so wound up; and the closer the trip gets, the tighter I get wound.  It isn't until I'm on the plane or in the car that I can finally breath & relax.  And a good cocktail upon arrival usually smooths out any last edges.   


Here is a little something to help brighten your day.  The new Foamy cartoon is out.   
This one is really bawdy & pretty darn funny!
http://www.illwillpress.com/TP22.html


----------



## MistyMoss

I have a really cute vampire for you all. Of course I am still waiting for JD to play one so I can dream about that!!!






So........who has pics of the furbabies in Halloween costumes. I'm sure I have posted this before but here is Duncan last year before his party at the kennel.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

MistyMoss said:


> So........who has pics of the furbabies in Halloween costumes. I'm sure I have posted this before but here is Duncan last year before his party at the kennel.



that is too adorable!!!

Here is Lestat (and as you can tell, he is so happy to be dressed up..lol):


----------



## MistyMoss

Shyvioletisme said:


> that is too adorable!!!
> 
> Here is Lestat (and as you can tell, he is so happy to be dressed up..lol):



 He really does NOT look happy. 

Duncan loves stuff on his head. He is just goofy like that.


----------



## Bushmills

Wow, I'll have to quit my job if I'm to keep with with all this high tech world wide inter web stuff!  I don't get on here in a few days and pages transpire, with topics changing from Harleys and 420, to paganism and Halloween.

As for religion and I, don't have any use for it at all - complete athiest here - just a choice, doesn't mean I'm right.  I do though, share your views on what I call "protecting the weak".  While I'm by no means a "tree hugger", I don't believe in destroying the planet in the fashion that we're doing it in (I'd rather destroy it in my own fashion - just kidding).  For some reason, the only time watching violence really irks me is when it's against a "weaker than" (animal, child, female, nature, etc).  I can't abide by bullying of any kind.  By the way - I share your opinion - Halloween is the greatest holliday of the year by far!  Being a horror movie fan from waaaay back, I love the tv during October.  A close second would be new years eve - an excuse to drink too much, laugh too much, and make promises you never intend on keeping, without consequence!  

Happy Friday everyone - who wishes they were riding on Expedition Everest right now?


----------



## Mayhem2008

Shyviolet - despite your cat looking like he is going to head right for your juggler after the pic is snapped but I love his little outfit!! LOL
Misty - Duncan is adorable! My dog loves to be dressed and has a drawer full of clothing. I'll have to put one of her costumes on and take a pic for you all.
Zima - I plan to have quite a few cocktails after arriving at the world. Even bring along my beloved JD (Jack Daniels not Johnny Depp! ) in my suitcase so I can grab a coke the minute we land and start mixing. 
Madd - I'm a Christmas girl  The minute Thanksgivivng is over the tree goes up and the Christmas specials take priority on the TV. I've always been big into Christmas, not for religious reasons but just cuz I like it. 
Bushmills - you need to make regularly scheduled stops on this thread if you want to keep track of what's going on...I learned that the hard way 
I thought I treat you to a pic of me during my high school years


----------



## Mayhem2008

Madd - I couldn't resist responding to you on the Food Porn thread 
Still keeping my nose clean...just barely


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> Madd - I couldn't resist responding to you on the Food Porn thread
> Still keeping my nose clean...just barely



I had to send the link to my cousin- she is a Disney freak and thought she would get a kick out it- she thought is was Goofy's too! Hmmmmm- is Goofy double dippin'??? 



Mayhem2008 said:


> I thought I treat you to a pic of me during my high school years



I AM FREAKIN' PEEING RIGHT NOW AT THIS PIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do you know why!!!!!!!????????? I bought that pic for my best friend ( I think it was from Spencer's!) when we were in our late teens, early 20s- I thought that darn cat was SO funny smokin' up!!! 

I JUST brought the pic up to her a few months ago and that ding dong could not remember it!!! How could you forget that darn cat smokin'! 

I am going to e-mail it to her right now!!!!!

Thanks May!!!! 

PS- doubt we will be riding the cycle this weekend for the rally- all I see in the forcast is, rain, rain, rain! 

But there is an awesome run in a few weeks- I have that baby on my calendar! We did it a few years ago and I LOVED it! 

It is for a police officer who was killed in the line of duty- and what is great is- the ride is 63 miles through 3 counties and the cops for all the counties are at EVERY single red light and stop sign just to stop traffic so that we can all keep rolling!!!!! The counties that we go through are _beautiful_- it is all corn fields and farm land (yup- I live in the part of NJ that has farms, grass, cows,  lots of trees )

I feel bad for people in cars when we do these runs b/c you can see their faces, all PO'd b/c they have to stop and wait for us! I have been on a few runs where people just give up, get out of their cars, and just watch the 1000s and 1000s of bikes go by!

ETA- forgot to ask! *Bushmills*- did you watch The Sons of Anarchy!? 

I cannot discuss with you how HOT I thought Charlie was though! I will have to present that one to the girls! 

GIRLS! You should see how hot this biker dude is on the show- check his out! Charlie is dreamyyyyy! (< bhaaaa- I am a dork!) but he really is!
http://www.fxnetworks.com/shows/originals/soa/#Nav/CastAndCrew

All I kept thinking was- they need to make a movie/show about Biker/Vampires OMG! Imagine the neck (and other) tingling anticipating that movie/show!


----------



## maddhatir

Hey you all- guess what??!!

We are going to need to make a "new  home" for ourselves very soon- we are @ page 245- we only have 5 more pages before they lock the thread!


----------



## Bushmills

maddhatir said:


> ETA- forgot to ask! *Bushmills*- did you watch The Sons of Anarchy!?
> 
> I cannot discuss with you how HOT I thought Charlie was though! I will have to present that one to the girls!



No, haven't seen it yet, but am planning on DVRing it this weekend - it looks interesting, though you're right, I'm not an authority on male hotness.  Perhaps I'll ask DW to give her opinion - her current celeb "hit list" is: Johnny Depp, Gerard Butler, Vin Diesel....

Have you seen the new HST movie that's apparently out in limited release?


----------



## Bushmills

maddhatir said:


> Hey you all- guess what??!!
> 
> We are going to need to make a "new  home" for ourselves very soon- we are @ page 245- we only have 5 more pages before they lock the thread!



Good point - I've started a thread called "Married's No Kids Thread - General Babble From The Rabble" so we can continue our banter.


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> No, haven't seen it yet, but am planning on DVRing it this weekend - it looks interesting, though you're right, I'm not an authority on male hotness.  Perhaps I'll ask DW to give her opinion - her current celeb "hit list" is: Johnny Depp, Gerard Butler, Vin Diesel....
> 
> Have you seen the new HST movie that's apparently out in limited release?



Yes- ask the wife! I bet she says yesssssss! 

I had to look up Gerard Butler b/c I am not familiar with him. I see he was Beowulf- I can probably get into him lookin' like that! The other pics I saw- he looked a little too "clean cut". 

I used to like Vin- (XXX) but once he did The Pacifier, - I lost respect for him. He needs to do more with his shirt off and I am SO not into guys flauntin' their guns!  but he can get away with it- maybe it is his voice. 

I have not seen Gonzo- The Life and Work of Dr. HST! DH and I were in Philly in July and it was playing right across the street from where were were- he said to wait until it comes out on DVD. I may have aske dyou this before but did you see Buy the Ticket, Take the Ride?? That was ON DEMAND a few months ago and we caught it. 




Bushmills said:


> Good point - I've started a thread called "Married's No Kids Thread - General Babble From The Rabble" so we can continue our banter.



Link- Link- where's the link!? 

It kind of scares me to move to another thread- does everyone remember what happened the last time we did that!?


----------



## Bushmills

Sorry, my bad - here's the link - http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1942733

What happened the last time?

I haven't seen Buy the Ticket yet - have been too busy for any tv until last week (all work and no play make Bushmills a very sober unfun individual).  I have a 2 dvd set called Breakfast with Hunter that is very insightful - highly recommended!

Gerard Butler was also in a vampire flic (b movie, I think called Dracula 2000 - I love B movies and DW loves Mr Butler, so it worked out for both of us!).


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> Here is a little something to help brighten your day.  The new Foamy cartoon is out.
> This one is really bawdy & pretty darn funny!
> http://www.illwillpress.com/TP22.html





maddhatir said:


> GIRLS! You should see how hot this biker dude is on the show- check his out! Charlie is dreamyyyyy! (< bhaaaa- I am a dork!) but he really is!
> http://www.fxnetworks.com/shows/originals/soa/#Nav/CastAndCrew



 UUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!!  I HATE ENTERTAINMENT BLOCKS AT MY JOB!!!!!​


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> Sorry, my bad - here's the link - http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1942733
> 
> What happened the last time?



Thanks for the link- 

We all went rushing over to another CF thread just to look at pics of peoples pets and all #e!! broke loose and some of us got caught in the crossfire!

There was a little of this  and a little of that  people were banished, the thread was closed- it was craziness! We are afraid to move out of our comfort zone now


----------



## Bushmills

maddhatir said:


> Thanks for the link-
> 
> We all went rushing over to another CF thread just to look at pics of peoples pets and all #e!! broke loose and some of us got caught in the crossfire!
> 
> There was a little of this  and a little of that  people were banished, the thread was closed- it was craziness! We are afraid to move out of our comfort zone now



A pet pic thread?  That's a great idea.  Our pets are our kids as I'm sure is the same for many of us here.  We have 2 dogs (a Weimeraner named Dyson, Mr Hazar Budds; and a Border Collie named Hannah, Hannah Banana, Wiggles Bum), and 2 cats (a very slight, but very tough girl names Bones, and a very fat, very spoiled boy named The Professor, Moe, Moe Diddler, Moe Man Khaddafi, Moishous Allowishous, Professor Sheerbunk Kittensworth III).  We tend to develop many names for each "kid" - not planned, just sort of works out that way - yet they respond to each name.

What "kids" do you have?  Hey, let's start a pet picture thread - that surely won't cause any harm.  Just kidding.


----------



## maddhatir

Bushmills said:


> A pet pic thread?  That's a great idea.  Our pets are our kids as I'm sure is the same for many of us here.  We have 2 dogs (a Weimeraner named Dyson, Mr Hazar Budds; and a Border Collie named Hannah, Hannah Banana, Wiggles Bum), and 2 cats (a very slight, but very tough girl names Bones, and a very fat, very spoiled boy named The Professor, Moe, Moe Diddler, Moe Man Khaddafi, Moishous Allowishous, Professor Sheerbunk Kittensworth III).  We tend to develop many names for each "kid" - not planned, just sort of works out that way - yet they respond to each name.
> 
> What "kids" do you have?  Hey, let's start a pet picture thread - that surely won't cause any harm.  Just kidding.



HA! It was not really a pet pic thread- someone just happened to be posting pics of their pets on the CF thread and some of us wanted to go and take a look-see. 

I do not have any "kids" DH and I are SO allergic to animals and we both have asthma! 

We have a MIL suite on our house and mom is there with her 2 kitties so I go and visit them a lot. They kind of started out as my pets years ago- but I got so bad- she had to claim them. 

I would wake up in the middle of the night not being able to breathe and DH would have to DRIVE ME AROUND! I had to leave the house to breathe- getting out of the house was always a last resort after my inhaler. 

I have been to the hospital a few times b/c of my asthma- but it is under control now. The only good thing about going to the hospital with asthma....they rush you right in when they know you are not breathing  

I love animals so much that I became a vegetarian, no leather, fur, and do not use products that are tested on animals. 

Let me tell you- the "no leather" is SO hard with all the awesome Harley clothes out there!!! I told DH I am saving him a FORTUNE by not wearing leather!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

MistyMoss said:


> He really does NOT look happy.
> 
> Duncan loves stuff on his head. He is just goofy like that.



well this was about half a second before he was able to toss the top part off of his head, he then proceded to try and run away but instead just fell over and looked defeated by the body part of the costume..DH finally felt pity on him and took it off...lol


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> I bet you 2 are type A, borderline OCD too; aren't you?
> 
> I get so wound up; and the closer the trip gets, the tighter I get wound.  It isn't until I'm on the plane or in the car that I can finally breath & relax.  And a good cocktail upon arrival usually smooths out any last edges.



Ah yes, this is me.  I even get nauseous while we are packing up to leave which does not stop until I get on the plane.  I cannot eat or drink anything either until I get on the plane.  Then once they begin serving beverages I will order a Mimosa for morning flights and a rum & coke or something for afternoon flights to take the edge off. 



MistyMoss said:


> I have a really cute vampire for you all. Of course I am still waiting for JD to play one so I can dream about that!!!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So........who has pics of the furbabies in Halloween costumes. I'm sure I have posted this before but here is Duncan last year before his party at the kennel.



I love, love, love this vampire Mickey!  I would love to make that my avatar for October.

And you furbaby is very cute in his costume.  I have never put mine in an outfit except for a t-shirt.  It looks so funny it's hard for me to stop laughing and I almost pee my pants! 



Shyvioletisme said:


> that is too adorable!!!
> 
> Here is Lestat (and as you can tell, he is so happy to be dressed up..lol):



Your Lestat is a beautiful kitty, but I agree with the others, he's does not look happy in that costume!



Bushmills said:


> Happy Friday everyone - who wishes they were riding on Expedition Everest right now?



ME! ME! ME!! 



Mayhem2008 said:


> The minute Thanksgivivng is over the tree goes up and the Christmas specials take priority on the TV. I've always been big into Christmas, not for religious reasons but just cuz I like it.



I will admit that I love the Christmas shows.  Our favorite is A Christmas Story.  For Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party last year DH wore a t-shirt to the party with a picture of Ralphie wearing a cowboy hat and underneath says You'll shoot your eye out.  And I have all of the cartoon shows on video, Santa Claus is coming to Town is my favorite, I love Kris Kringles voice in it and also like the Warlock.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Mayhem2008 said:


> I thought I treat you to a pic of me during my high school years



Can I tell you that in 8th grade I got caught....."smokin' in the girls room?"  Two of my friends and I decided to take a little break from class and low and behold my art teacher walked in the door, BUSTED!  I was suspended immediately and was not allowed to attend any school functions.  Of course I had just told a guy I would go to the Sadie Hawkins dance with him that Friday night.  He said it was all good and we got together anyway that night with some other friends and had a "smokin'" party of our own.


----------



## zima-cheryl

Bushmills said:


> Happy Friday everyone - who wishes they were riding on Expedition Everest right now?



I sure do!  I'd even be happy to be stuck on Small World...
Any place is better than in the office at work on a sunny Friday afternoon!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> I sure do!  *I'd even be happy to be stuck on Small World...*Any place is better than in the office at work on a sunny Friday afternoon!



Now THAT is pure desperation!


----------



## Bushmills

Desperation it is!  Though I can understand the sentiment - it's a rainy Friday here, and I'd rather be snoozing in the hall of presidents, or just sitting on a bench in Disney right now.  I'm not a greedy guy - I don't need to be on a ride, just would love to be in the atmosphere.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Yay, the sun is trying to break through the clouds and the weather person is saying it will be a clear, sunny sky this afternoon.

Okay, I'm not going to be greedy either, but I don't have to even make it to the parks, how about sitting at the pool bar of any WDW resort.  You know what I'm thinking about.....  and I'll have one of these too.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Yay, the sun is trying to break through the clouds and the weather person is saying it will be a clear, sunny sky this afternoon.
> 
> Okay, I'm not going to be greedy either, but I don't have to even make it to the parks, how about sitting at the pool bar of any WDW resort.  You know what I'm thinking about.....  and I'll have one of these too.



mmmmm- pools have kids ........howwwww abouuuut.....I got it,  outside at The Rose and the Crown- looking out over the lagoon. Of course, our feet up on a chair and it has to be night so it is nice and cool and no sun in the eyes.  I am pretty darn picky for a daydream!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> mmmmm- pools have kids ........howwwww abouuuut.....I got it,  outside at The Rose and the Crown- looking out over the lagoon. Of course, our feet up on a chair and it has to be night so it is nice and cool and no sun in the eyes.  I am pretty darn picky for a daydream!



I definitely like your idea, I hope to be doing that in 54 days, we have ADR's for the Rose & Crown, hoping for patio seats, at 7:30 p.m. on 10/29.   And by the way, it's your daydream so you can be as picky as you want!

I don't know if we were just lucky, heck yeah we must have been, but we took a break mid-week during our Dec. WDW vacay and stayed at the resort.  We sat around the pool all afternoon at the AKL and their were maybe 2 kids the entire time we were there!  They were all in the parks, yippee!


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> mmmmm- pools have kids ........howwwww abouuuut.....I got it,  outside at The Rose and the Crown- looking out over the lagoon. Of course, our feet up on a chair and it has to be night so it is nice and cool and no sun in the eyes.  I am pretty darn picky for a daydream!



Well -- if we are going for the perfect daydream lets make it during Illuminations and along w/our beverages maybe a couple yummy desserts from the pastry shop over in France.


----------



## dave_echidna

No kids = Great idea


----------



## MistyMoss

dave_echidna said:


> No kids = Great idea



WELCOME!!!!

You may want to join our new thread. This one will be locked soon due to the size. The new one is here:  http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1942733


----------



## MistyMoss

TKDisneylover said:


> I love, love, love this vampire Mickey!  I would love to make that my avatar for October.



Feel free to steal him!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

MistyMoss said:


> Feel free to steal him!!



Thanks!



dave_echidna said:


> No kids = Great idea



​


----------



## Mayhem2008

Where do I go??? Here? Over to the new thread? Both?? I need direction people!


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> Where do I go??? Here? Over to the new thread? Both?? I need direction people!



We are keeping you on your toes! 

You have the funniest kitty pics!!!!


----------



## Mayhem2008




----------



## TKDisneylover

Okay, even though we have our Babble from the Rabble going I thought it only appropriate to close out this thread appropriately by using up our last few pages.  Any objections?

Anyway, I thought I would ask some questions that I have related to our WDW trip.  First, has anyone ever gone to the California Grill to have dinner and watch Wishes?  We have a 7:30 ADR and I am worried that we probably will not get a window table, if we arrive an hour early do you think they would consider seating us even though we have a later ADR?  Also, of the people who have eaten there, is the food worth the cost in your opinion?


----------



## bicker

We got there about 7PM and were told, in no uncertain terms, "Those tables are reserved."  So, evidently, when you arrive doesn't matter much.


----------



## TKDisneylover

bicker said:


> We got there about 7PM and were told, in no uncertain terms, "Those tables are reserved."  So, evidently, when you arrive doesn't matter much.



I thought they could not be "reserved" It was explained when we made the ADR that we could request a window seat but that there was no guarantee as they were a first come first served seating.


----------



## bicker

That's exactly correct.  We were told the same thing.  Evidently, there is another class of guest.  

What really steamed me up, though, was that when Wishes started, the folks at most of the front-and-center tables were shuffled off to some private viewing area, so they didn't even need those tables to enjoy the show!


----------



## TKDisneylover

bicker said:


> That's exactly correct.  We were told the same thing.  Evidently, there is another class of guest.
> 
> What really steamed me up, though, was that when Wishes started, the folks at most of the front-and-center tables were shuffled off to some private viewing area, so they didn't even need those tables to enjoy the show!



That really stinks!  Again, I had heard that the people with window seats stayed seated and anybody who did not get a window seat could go out to a "viewing area" to see them.  Now I am actually thinking of changing my ADR because I wanted this to be a surprise for my DH, my best friend and her DH who are coming along.  For the price that we will be paying for the meal will it even be worth it.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> That really stinks!  Again, I had heard that the people with window seats stayed seated and anybody who did not get a window seat could go out to a "viewing area" to see them.  Now I am actually thinking of changing my ADR because I wanted this to be a surprise for my DH, my best friend and her DH who are coming along.  For the price that we will be paying for the meal will it even be worth it.



Tammy- if you were paying for the meal out of pocket, maybe you can do one of the firework "cruises" I wonder if you are allowed to bring some wine onboard??


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Tammy- if you were paying for the meal out of pocket, maybe you can do one of the firework "cruises" I wonder if you are allowed to bring some wine onboard??



Oh, that's a good idea!!   I will have to do some searching on that!  Thanks for the idea!

Anyone out there do one of these cruises or have an answer about bringing wine onboard?


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Oh, that's a good idea!!   I will have to do some searching on that!  Thanks for the idea!
> 
> Anyone out there do one of these cruises or have an answer about bringing wine onboard?



I wonder which forum you can find out that info on???

Maybe Theme Parks???

That does sound fun- skip the wine- go for a few bottles of champagne!!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I wonder which forum you can find out that info on???
> 
> Maybe Theme Parks???
> 
> That does sound fun- skip the wine- go for a few bottles of champagne!!!



Okay, we may be getting too much into the romance factor here.  Not saying that would be bad for DH and I, but the couple we are going with......not so much.  They have two kids, 1 in college & 1 a junior in H.S., they sleep in seperate bedrooms and have for over 10 years now(you know what's missing there! ).  Let's just say they are one of those couples that stay together for the kids.  She plans to stay with him until the youngest completes college.  And you may ask, why would we go to WDW with these people?  Well they do like Disney and it's my best friend who I only see (if I'm lucky), once a year, they live in Alabama.  I wanted to do the dinner & fireworks thinking it would be fun and different, but not as a romantic thing.  DH & I already talked about the fact that we will not be showing any forms of affection towards each other in front of them just to keep things light hearted and fun, again, not romantic.  We are hoping to break away from them for short periods of time to allow us to enjoy WDW in a romantic way.  The key word here is "hoping".

Crazy isn't it!?


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Okay, we may be getting too much into the romance factor here.  Not saying that would be bad for DH and I, but the couple we are going with......not so much.  They have two kids, 1 in college & 1 a junior in H.S., they sleep in seperate bedrooms and have for over 10 years now(you know what's missing there! ).  Let's just say they are one of those couples that stay together for the kids.  She plans to stay with him until the youngest completes college.  And you may ask, why would we go to WDW with these people?  Well they do like Disney and it's my best friend who I only see (if I'm lucky), once a year, they live in Alabama.  I wanted to do the dinner & fireworks thinking it would be fun and different, but not as a romantic thing.  DH & I already talked about the fact that we will not be showing any forms of affection towards each other in front of them just to keep things light hearted and fun, again, not romantic.  We are hoping to break away from them for short periods of time to allow us to enjoy WDW in a romantic way.  The key word here is "hoping".
> 
> Crazy isn't it!?



That is sad! My BIL and SIL (NOT the SIL I went to Disney with!) are like that- She tells me she does not even love him Both of their kids are grown! I think they stay together out of habit.  

I tell DH all the time- Look- if you ever become unhappy- PLEASE tell me ASAP b/c I do not want to waste a minute of my life living a lie  I need to move on! Cut the ties, cold turkey, done.  

Actually  I did not suggest the champagne for romance- just for fun! Bubbles, fireworks, and a nice buzz, who needs much more?  - I know champagne gets me buzzed and giggling mighty quick! Maybe that is just what your friends need- A darn GIGGLE!!  

Laughing is my favorite thing to do!-  

We are doing a girl's day out in 2 weeks and my friend was asking me if I minded going to Lancaster PA again? (we did a girl's day out to Lancaster last year) I said, 'Look, when I get my a$$ in the car you can take me wherever you please! I am up for laughs and will have fun no matter where we go!"


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I tell DH all the time- Look- if you ever become unhappy- PLEASE tell me ASAP b/c I do not want to waste a minute of my life living a lie  I need to move on! Cut the ties, cold turkey, done.



I pretty much said the say thing to DH too.  If you find someone else you are interested in or just decide you don't want to be with me anymore than just say so.  I have 3, can you say it 3 girlfriends who have had affairs.  Totally blows my mind.  One of them is my friend I am going to Disney with, they ended it and he died of cancer a year later.  Another one finally got divorced, and the other one told her DH and now they are in counseling and trying to get through it.  He's definitely struggling and she's dealing with having feelings with 2 different men.  UGH!  



> Actually  I did not suggest the champagne for romance- just for fun! Bubbles, fireworks, and a nice buzz, who needs much more?  - I know champagne gets me buzzed and giggling mighty quick! Maybe that is just what your friends need- A darn GIGGLE!!



 You made me laugh out loud!  Your right, they probably could use a good giggle!  I will check into it and see how much it costs and let you know what I find out and if we decide to go that route.



> Laughing is my favorite thing to do!-
> 
> We are doing a girl's day out in 2 weeks and my friend was asking me if I minded going to Lancaster PA again? (we did a girl's day out to Lancaster last year) I said, 'Look, when I get my a$$ in the car you can take me wherever you please! I am up for laughs and will have fun no matter where we go!"



That's nice to do a girls weekend!  My BFF and I usually do a girls getaway, but this time decided to include the DH's.  But we have one heck of a time no matter where we go.  It never fails that we do not end the night laughing our a$$es off, my face actually hurts from laughing so hard!


----------



## TKDisneylover

We have ADR's for lunch at the Yak & Yeti on our day at Animal Kingdom, has anyone else eaten lunch there?  I would love to hear your opinion about the service, meal, etc.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> We have ADR's for lunch at the Yak & Yeti on our day at Animal Kingdom, has anyone else eaten lunch there?  I would love to hear your opinion about the service, meal, etc.



No- never been there- have you checked the Restaurant boards to see what the buzz is!?

I did find this on AllEars: http://land.allears.net/reviewpost/showproduct.php?product=372&cat=33

Sorry for being OT- but I CAN tell you- Wolfgang Puck Express has some AWESOME pizzas!

You can't beat that place for a CS meal!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Sorry for being OT- but I CAN tell you- Wolfgang Puck Express has some AWESOME pizzas!
> 
> You can't beat that place for a CS meal!




ooh, I agree. We love the pizzas there!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> No- never been there- have you checked the Restaurant boards to see what the buzz is!?
> 
> I did find this on AllEars: http://land.allears.net/reviewpost/showproduct.php?product=372&cat=33
> 
> Sorry for being OT- but I CAN tell you- Wolfgang Puck Express has some AWESOME pizzas!
> 
> You can't beat that place for a CS meal!





Shyvioletisme said:


> ooh, I agree. We love the pizzas there!!



Thanks for the link Madd & Tiffany!

It appears that the Yak & Yeti are getting positive reviews.  I know I could be looking these things up on my own, but what better way to use up the last few pages on our Adults/no kids thread than with Disney food chatter?  Plus I'm getting some opinions/info from people I can rely on. 

DH and I ate at Wolfgang Puck's during our 2004 trip but had sandwiches.  I will see if anyone is interested in stopping for pizza.  Pizza is one of my favorite foods to eat and since I have not had any in almost 4 weeks (but who's counting!), and it will be even longer by the time I get to Disney I will be ready to do a carb overload!!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Thanks for the link Madd & Tiffany!
> 
> It appears that the Yak & Yeti are getting positive reviews.  I know I could be looking these things up on my own, but what better way to use up the last few pages on our Adults/no kids thread than with Disney food chatter?  Plus I'm getting some opinions/info from people I can rely on.
> 
> DH and I ate at Wolfgang Puck's during our 2004 trip but had sandwiches.  I will see if anyone is interested in stopping for pizza.  Pizza is one of my favorite foods to eat and since I have not had any in almost 4 weeks (but who's counting!), and it will be even longer by the time I get to Disney I will be ready to do a carb overload!!



That's great the reviews are possitive. We ate at the new (and improved ) Tusker House- I would never go back again  

Another suggestion- b/c you will get a dessert with your CS meal- go for the Creme Brulee @ WP Express- OMG I am not a fan of Creme Brulee, but when DH and I ate there a few years ago- I ate almost all of his dessert! I love the iced tea too. 

Where else will you be dining???

I may have mentioned this here before- but I was not happy with the DP changes- they do not allow you an appetizer with your TS meal- however, you can have dessert? Yes- I love my desserts, but I would much prefer an appy! I thought Disney was all about "healthy choices" now. 

BUT- just like everything else they do- they always make the changes for the kids (getting rid of good restaurants to replace them w/ character meals, taking away our clubs @ PI) < just a rant about that!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Another suggestion- b/c you will get a dessert with your CS meal- go for the Creme Brulee @ WP Express- OMG I am not a fan of Creme Brulee, but when DH and I ate there a few years ago- I ate almost all of his dessert! I love the iced tea too.



Actually we will not be on the dining plan.  We are going in Oct. and it ends the end of September.  So we will be hoofing the bill for all of our meals.  However we do have a Disney Visa and have accumulated lots of Disney Dollars so we will be able to use that for some of our meals.  Also, I am not much of a dessert person, I prefer the appetizer first and just skip dessert.  I think of my cocktails as dessert! 



> Where else will you be dining???



We have ADR's for 50's Prime Time Cafe, Tony's Town Square, along with the other's I have mentioned before, Yak & Yeti, California Grill & Rose & Crown Pub.



> BUT- just like everything else they do- they always make the changes for the kids (getting rid of good restaurants to replace them w/ character meals, taking away our clubs @ PI) < just a rant about that!



Talk about a total rip-off!!!   I love, love, love the Adventurer's Club, DH & I would always have such a great time there!  It totally made our trip every time to go to the Comedy Club & AC.  I have signed every frickin' petition I could find about keeping them from closing the clubs.  And there was even one about moving it to the Boardwalk, that would be sweet.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Talk about a total rip-off!!!   I love, love, love the Adventurer's Club, DH & I would always have such a great time there!  It totally made our trip every time to go to the Comedy Club & AC.  I have signed every frickin' petition I could find about keeping them from closing the clubs.  And there was even one about moving it to the Boardwalk, that would be sweet.



I said that exact thing to DH- they should move the AC elsewhere! The Boardwalk would be a great location since they have Dance Club and Jellyrolls anyway! Maybe they will just make the AC 21+ like the other 2 clubs there!

Oh- I would be SO happy!!!!


----------



## Mayhem2008

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood......yup my meds are finally kicking in after 3 weeks and everything looks sunny again. Either that or I've really gone off my rocker and am totally wigged out 
You guys are making me hungry! Now I gotta go look at food porn and drool


----------



## Mayhem2008

Whoo Hoo!! It's Friday! Getting closer to our vaca and I'm doing a happy dance!


----------



## MistyMoss

Mayhem: Can I borrow your dancing cat!!?? I leave on Saturday for vacation!! Have a great time and try to be good. I, on the other hand, will try NOT to be good!!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Mayhem2008 said:


> Whoo Hoo!! It's Friday! Getting closer to our vaca and I'm doing a happy dance!



May, so glad to hear from you!  Good to hear your feeling so good and getting excited about trip!!   Has your DH had his MRI yet?  Did you find the info you needed about the scooter, and how is DH feeling about using one?  Okay I hope.

Love the dancing kitty!!


----------



## Mayhem2008

MistyMoss said:


> Mayhem: Can I borrow your dancing cat!!?? I leave on Saturday for vacation!! Have a great time and try to be good. I, on the other hand, will try NOT to be good!!



Borrow away! Just please feed him and scoop his litter box everyday!   Have an awesome time and act up as much as you want...it's not like you'll ever see those people again  



TKDisneylover said:


> May, so glad to hear from you!  Good to hear your feeling so good and getting excited about trip!!   Has your DH had his MRI yet?  Did you find the info you needed about the scooter, and how is DH feeling about using one?  Okay I hope.
> 
> Love the dancing kitty!!



He is scheduled for the MRI on Monday   and then a follow up with the dr on the 23rd. (we leave the 25th) so any surgery will be done when we get back. He wants to use a wheelchair instead of a scooter, even though I reminded him that he can run annoying PEOPLE done easier with the scooter  We are going to make the best of it and enjoy ourselves no matter what. How can we not? It's Disney World!   And besides, it will be our 10th anniversary while we are there so that in itself is a big thing.
Off for more java!  Have a good one everybody!


----------



## Mayhem2008

A little fun for you all


----------



## maddhatir

Mayhem2008 said:


> A little fun for you all



Dude! Not sure if it is just me right now,   But all I see are red x's!


----------



## Mayhem2008

maddhatir said:


> Dude! Not sure if it is just me right now,   But all I see are red x's!


What? You mean you can't see them?  I think it's just you! 
Kidding, kidding...the links didn't work after I posted them even though when I hit "preview post" they showed. I'll fix them so they don't make you think you are seeing things...like red x's...


----------



## TKDisneylover

HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYBODY!!!! ​

*Mayhem:*  Any word on DH's MRI?


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYBODY!!!! ​
> 
> *Mayhem:*  Any word on DH's MRI?




She e-mailed me yesterday for something and said they will not find out anything until Tuesday!

She is running around crazy getting ready for her trip.


----------



## maddhatir

I will help use up our last 2 pages here!

HELP! I can't get this song out of my HEAD! ARGHHHHHHHHHHH!!! When I hear this I think of some hillbilly with no shirt and overalls! 

I keep walking around singing "hootie boogie woogie"  When he sings that part about the "hootie boogie woogie" he sounds like The Swedish Chef on The Muppets! 

I must torture you all now so you have the song in your heads! *evil laugh*

(no video, just the song)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90mYNqZ1XY4&feature=related


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> She e-mailed me yesterday for something and said they will not find out anything until Tuesday!
> 
> She is running around crazy getting ready for her trip.



Tuesday!?!?!  What the heck is wrong with those doctors, don't they know they need this info now, for cryin' out loud they have a Disney trip coming up!

On the foot front for me, the new orthotics are working well.  I went to the mall Wed. evening and walked around for a couple hours, my feet were killing me but I had great recovery so it's a start.  And the weightloss is going well, however I did not see results last weekend on the scale but felt it in my clothes so that another good start.  Next week I will increase my exercise.



maddhatir said:


> HELP! I can't get this song out of my HEAD! ARGHHHHHHHHHHH!!! When I hear this I think of some hillbilly with no shirt and overalls!
> 
> I keep walking around singing "hootie boogie woogie"  When he sings that part about the "hootie boogie woogie" he sounds like The Swedish Chef on The Muppets!
> 
> I must torture you all now so you have the song in your heads! *evil laugh*
> 
> (no video, just the song)
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90mYNqZ1XY4&feature=related



Madd, that was definitely torture, it sounded like a hill billy heavy metal tune, very funny I must admit.  It was hard for me to understand the hootie boogie woogie, must be my old classic rock ears loosing their hearing. 

Okay, I'm listening to a Disney's Greatest Hits Soundtrack on my computer, let's help put a new song in Madd's mind.......Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to work we go, Hi Ho, Hi, Ho.........

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8AkKnLMELo


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Tuesday!?!?!  What the heck is wrong with those doctors, don't they know they need this info now, for cryin' out loud they have a Disney trip coming up!
> 
> On the foot front for me, the new orthotics are working well.  I went to the mall Wed. evening and walked around for a couple hours, my feet were killing me but I had great recovery so it's a start.  And the weightloss is going well, however I did not see results last weekend on the scale but felt it in my clothes so that another good start.  Next week I will increase my exercise.
> 
> 
> 
> Madd, that was definitely torture, it sounded like a hill billy heavy metal tune, very funny I must admit.  It was hard for me to understand the hootie boogie woogie, must be my old classic rock ears loosing their hearing.
> 
> Okay, I'm listening to a Disney's Greatest Hits Soundtrack on my computer, let's help put a new song in Madd's mind.......Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to work we go, Hi Ho, Hi, Ho.........



Bhaaaaaa! I curse you and your "Hi-Hos"!!!!  

Congrats on your weightloss! As long as you can feel it in your clothes you know it is working!!! I am sure the weightloss will help a lot with your foot too.

May said they did not want to PO the doc so they are waiting patiently until Tuesday. I guess not matter the results are- he will get a scooter and deal with what comes next when he gets home. No way would anything get in my way of a Disney Trip!

Hey Tammy- DH is on a raw food diet kick right now. At first he just bought a bunch of fruits, nuts and veggies and was making salads etc- very boring! So I went online yesterday and found some really good recipes to make things more exciting! Actually I am going to add a lot of the raw food into my diet. I will not be a strict as DH- he eats nothing cooked, processed, pasturized, non-organic, NO COFFEE! . All of that is not that important to me, besides, I like my yogurt, egg whites, coffee etc. Oh god! and I cannot forget my martinis! 

We are having the lettuce wraps tonight for dinner from this site- I am an avacado freak so I will enjoy this!
http://www.living-foods.com/recipes/

Here is another site of you are interested since you are doing so well with your weightloss!
http://www.fromsadtoraw.com/RawRecipes.htm

I want to go and get a dehydrator for some of the recipes.

We have our bike run on Sunday- the weather is going to be beautiful, 78 and sunny! I can't wait. 

What are everyone's plans for the weekend?


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Bhaaaaaa! I curse you and your "Hi-Hos"!!!!



  



> Congrats on your weightloss! As long as you can feel it in your clothes you know it is working!!! I am sure the weightloss will help a lot with your foot too.



Thanks so much!



> May said they did not want to PO the doc so they are waiting patiently until Tuesday. I guess not matter the results are- he will get a scooter and deal with what comes next when he gets home. No way would anything get in my way of a Disney Trip!



Glad to hear they are doing the scooter rental, that will probably be the best thing they do!  And they can get to the front of every single ride!!  How sweet is that?! 



> Hey Tammy- DH is on a raw food diet kick right now. At first he just bought a bunch of fruits, nuts and veggies and was making salads etc- very boring! So I went online yesterday and found some really good recipes to make things more exciting! Actually I am going to add a lot of the raw food into my diet. I will not be a strict as DH- he eats nothing cooked, processed, pasturized, non-organic, NO COFFEE! . All of that is not that important to me, besides, I like my yogurt, egg whites, coffee etc. Oh god! and I cannot forget my martinis!
> 
> We are having the lettuce wraps tonight for dinner from this site- I am an avacado freak so I will enjoy this!
> http://www.living-foods.com/recipes/
> 
> Here is another site of you are interested since you are doing so well with your weightloss!
> http://www.fromsadtoraw.com/RawRecipes.htm



Thank you, thank you for those websites!  A lot of those recipes fit into the Atkins program perfectly!  I was just thinking that I am feeling so deprived and that I need to start searching for new ways to make meals.  And I LOVE Avocado too!

Also, speaking of cocktails (just ignore me if I mentioned this on here before, I just can't remember ), anyway I found this great rum by Bacardi, it's a Melon rum that's flavored with watermelon.  I was mixing it with Sprite Zero and feeling very proud and happy that I could have my alcohol and enjoy it too!  Then I found this great website, www.bajabob.com that sells some great sugar free pre-mixes.  I was looking through the different items that I could order and noticed that FLAVORED RUM HAS ADDED SUGAR!!  UGHHHHHHH!  I had four of them over the weekend and because of the extra sugar it totally threw me out of ketosis (fat burning on the Atkins plan), so it was like starting all over again Monday.  So watch out people if your watching your carbs, flavored rum has added sugar.  Thank goodness for Baja Bob!



> I want to go and get a dehydrator for some of the recipes.
> 
> We have our bike run on Sunday- the weather is going to be beautiful, 78 and sunny! I can't wait.
> 
> What are everyone's plans for the weekend?



My dad is big into raw foods, he is also a big juicer, he juices everything!  He found a specific juicer that does not take all of the nutrients out of the vegetable, apparently those are much more expensive than your usual juicers from the local department/cooking store ($400.00+).

Sounds like we are experiencing the same type of weather this weekend as you, have a wonderful time on your road trip!

Tonight DH & I and my DS & BIL are taking my DM out for dinner.  DH is going to bring her car back to our place so he can work on the breaks tomorrow morning, then nothing planned after that except the dreaded grocery shopping and off to the pet store for dog food.


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> :Thank you, thank you for those websites!  A lot of those recipes fit into the Atkins program perfectly!  I was just thinking that I am feeling so deprived and that I need to start searching for new ways to make meals.  And I LOVE Avocado too!



That is great that you can use the recipes!!! We can compare our meals! 



> Also, speaking of cocktails (just ignore me if I mentioned this on here before, I just can't remember ), anyway I found this great rum by Bacardi, it's a Melon rum that's flavored with watermelon.  I was mixing it with Sprite Zero and feeling very proud and happy that I could have my alcohol and enjoy it too!  Then I found this great website, www.bajabob.com that sells some great sugar free pre-mixes.  I was looking through the different items that I could order and noticed that FLAVORED RUM HAS ADDED SUGAR!!  UGHHHHHHH!  I had four of them over the weekend and because of the extra sugar it totally threw me out of ketosis (fat burning on the Atkins plan), so it was like starting all over again Monday.  So watch out people if your watching your carbs, flavored rum has added sugar.  Thank goodness for Baja Bob!



No- I do not remember you mentioning that. I am not a carb watcher. However, If you can somehow fit this little yummy drink into your diet you will be happy........Vanilla Vodka and 7UP!!!!!  Of course, you will need to use Diet 7Up, but it tastes exactly ike cream soda!!!!! Not sure if there is any sugar in the vodka from the vanilla flavor- it does not taste sweet at all!

I am laughing b/c I am still not sure if I can ever get my chocolate martini's to become low-cal I am going to a friend's house tonight- so she did a liquor store run at lunch today- she got me Godiva liquor and vanilla vodka for my martinis- ........ she asked "now is coffee-mate creamer considered half and half?"   I said "good try- now you sound like me!"  

DH is always saying- "Just put the %$#$ing half and half in the drink and stop trying to make it low-fat!"  I have 2% milk and fat free half and half in the fridge- it tastes like crap!  



> My dad is big into raw foods, he is also a big juicer, he juices everything!  He found a specific juicer that does not take all of the nutrients out of the vegetable, apparently those are much more expensive than your usual juicers from the local department/cooking store ($400.00+).


 maybe we can find a mini-juicer 



> Tonight DH & I and my DS & BIL are taking my DM out for dinner.  DH is going to bring her car back to our place so he can work on the breaks tomorrow morning, then nothing planned after that except the dreaded grocery shopping and off to the pet store for dog food.



Have fun!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

TKDisneylover said:


> On the foot front for me, the new orthotics are working well.  I went to the mall Wed. evening and walked around for a couple hours, my feet were killing me but I had great recovery so it's a start.  And the weightloss is going well, however I did not see results last weekend on the scale but felt it in my clothes so that another good start.  Next week I will increase my exercise.



That is great!!! And hey, it's nice to feel like your clothes are fitting better even when you don't see numbers going down on the scale..at least you still know you are doing something right!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> No- I do not remember you mentioning that. I am not a carb watcher. However, If you can somehow fit this little yummy drink into your diet you will be happy........Vanilla Vodka and 7UP!!!!!  Of course, you will need to use Diet 7Up, but it tastes exactly ike cream soda!!!!! Not sure if there is any sugar in the vodka from the vanilla flavor- it does not taste sweet at all!
> 
> I am laughing b/c I am still not sure if I can ever get my chocolate martini's to become low-cal I am going to a friend's house tonight- so she did a liquor store run at lunch today- she got me Godiva liquor and vanilla vodka for my martinis- ........ she asked "now is coffee-mate creamer considered half and half?"   I said "good try- now you sound like me!"



Yes!  The Vanilla Vodka & "diet" 7-up will work for sure!  Hmmm, I think I need to make a liquor store run myself!

You know those chocolate martini's sound so d*mn good!!!  I am on a mission to find out if I can make those Atkin's friendly!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Shyvioletisme said:


> That is great!!! And hey, it's nice to feel like your clothes are fitting better even when you don't see numbers going down on the scale..at least you still know you are doing something right!



Thanks Tiffany, it does feel really good!  I tried on 2 pair of slacks that I have not wore all summer because they just felt a little too snug to wear and they now feel perfectly comfortable to wear again!  Yippee!

On a side note I want to say how beautiful your Lestat is.  We really miss our cat Samantha and I have been thinking of adopting from the Humane Society or we actually have a friend who has kittens available in about 6 weeks.  But I just can't convince DH to agree.  I think it was so devastating for him when we had to put her down that he just cannot accept a new kitty in his life yet.  (heavy sigh), I guess I will just be patient and hope he will come around eventually.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

TKDisneylover said:


> Thanks Tiffany, it does feel really good!  I tried on 2 pair of slacks that I have not wore all summer because they just felt a little too snug to wear and they now feel perfectly comfortable to wear again!  Yippee!
> 
> On a side note I want to say how beautiful your Lestat is.  We really miss our cat Samantha and I have been thinking of adopting from the Humane Society or we actually have a friend who has kittens available in about 6 weeks.  But I just can't convince DH to agree.  I think it was so devastating for him when we had to put her down that he just cannot accept a new kitty in his life yet.  (heavy sigh), I guess I will just be patient and hope he will come around eventually.




aww. thanks! I'm sure your DH will come around eventually. It is exceptionally hard saying goodbye to a pet...they are with you so long and really are a member of the family...however I do know, that I don't think I'd be able to be without a kitty...Maybe try to convince him that getting a new kitty is not replacing Samantha but filling a new place in your home that is very empty...Take him to see the kitties when they are born...I know I can't resist a kitty!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Yes!  The Vanilla Vodka & "diet" 7-up will work for sure!  Hmmm, I think I need to make a liquor store run myself!
> 
> You know those chocolate martini's sound so d*mn good!!!  I am on a mission to find out if I can make those Atkin's friendly!



Atkins friendly AND Delish!? They need to go hand in hand Good luck!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Happy Monday Everybody!  Okay, so not so much "happy" but we're into another week and heading for a new weekend!

How were your weekends?

Madd, how did that road trip go with DH?

Anyone else out there?

Our weekend started out good, beautiful weather, DH helped my mom with her car, replaced the rotors, changed the oil, checked all the fluids, etc.  She was very happy with that!

Gave Veda (our dog) a bath yesterday, she really needed it!  Unfortunately the foot started bothering me again, I didn't do anything to it, didn't walk too much on it.  It was feeling really good last week, and then it got progressively worse over the weekend and this morning I could hardly walk on it.  I put my shoes on and that helped, and 3 ibuprofen later it's okay but still hurts.  Not sure if it's the change in weather, I do have a bit of arthritis in it (at my young age!), but I wouldn't think it would make it that sore.   So it's off to the orthopedic doctor again and see if he can figure out why it feels good one day and the next I can't walk on it.  Very frustrating!!!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Happy Monday Everybody!  Okay, so not so much "happy" but we're into another week and heading for a new weekend!
> 
> How were your weekends?
> 
> Madd, how did that road trip go with DH?
> 
> Anyone else out there?
> 
> Our weekend started out good, beautiful weather, DH helped my mom with her car, replaced the rotors, changed the oil, checked all the fluids, etc.  She was very happy with that!
> 
> Gave Veda (our dog) a bath yesterday, she really needed it!  Unfortunately the foot started bothering me again, I didn't do anything to it, didn't walk too much on it.  It was feeling really good last week, and then it got progressively worse over the weekend and this morning I could hardly walk on it.  I put my shoes on and that helped, and 3 ibuprofen later it's okay but still hurts.  Not sure if it's the change in weather, I do have a bit of arthritis in it (at my young age!), but I wouldn't think it would make it that sore.   So it's off to the orthopedic doctor again and see if he can figure out why it feels good one day and the next I can't walk on it.  Very frustrating!!!



ugh Tammy I am so sorry to hear about your set-back Please let us know what the doc says!

Sunday's bike run was nice. It took about 2 hours. I wanted to post a few pics- BUT- Photobucket is acting insane right now! Am I the only one who has problems with it freezing up???!!!! 

I will post them later 

Friday- went to a friend's house for martinis!! 

Saturday- I started getting ready for fall! I went around the yard and scooped up all of my garden treasures and put them in my garden shed. But not before I took a few hours to clean it out and organize it  so I can fit everything in there neatly. Now- I will just sit and wait patiently for DH to open it up and throw all of his JUNK in there and mess it up! Yes- he has a 30x40 polebarn and my teeny tiny little shed it hidden behind his, but he finds it necessary to put his junk in mine!- Men! 

Any day now, I have to start putting up my Halloween decorations!

This Saturday we have a girl's day out. Our 2nd annual trip to Lancaster PA. Maybe Sunday I will do my decorations.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

my parents came in to visit for the day Saturday. We had a good time, went out and walked a little as well. 
Sunday was a pretty lazy day...watched some movies and lazed around! 

Madd, I really had to tear myself away from all the awesome Halloween decorations at Garden Ridge Saturday when I was there...oh my goodness, they had some awesome stuff. We just don't have any outdoor space in which to put a lot of it, so none for me...

Tammy, I hope your foot feels better!!!


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> Madd, I really had to tear myself away from all the awesome Halloween decorations at Garden Ridge Saturday when I was there...oh my goodness, they had some awesome stuff. We just don't have any outdoor space in which to put a lot of it, so none for me...
> 
> Tammy, I hope your foot feels better!!!



You can always put orange bulbs in the xmas candles they sell and put them in your windows, or string up some lights and use window decorations! But will anyone see the window decorations? You should hang a skeleton out of your window and have him dangle from the building!  Do you have a balcony? That is sad- so, you get no trick or treaters since you are in the apt!? I would have to move 

I know when I go to pull out all of my decorations- I will be saying- OMG- I forgot I bought this last year at "the day after" sale!  

I bought 2 or 3 of the big skeletons and clowns that you hang from your trees that look like they are flying- and a strobe light, lots more head stones- I DO remember those things- but the rest will be a surprise

I can't wait until Nov 1st this year! I am going to be scooping up more savings! I have to go back soon and really study the Halloween Store so I know where to run and what to grab! 

UGH- my friend (the other Halloween freak) bought this gross thing that looks like a guy puking in a bucket! He makes the noise and it came with "mix". Someone told her to add small pieces of cork to the mixure so it looks real! UGH! I told he do not get that thing near me or else my head will be right in the bucket with him! That is ONE thing I cannot tolerate, puke.   I do not find that scary at all!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> ugh Tammy I am so sorry to hear about your set-back Please let us know what the doc says!



Will do, I have an appointment at 1:30, this Thursday.



> Sunday's bike run was nice. It took about 2 hours. I wanted to post a few pics- BUT- Photobucket is acting insane right now! Am I the only one who has problems with it freezing up???!!!!
> 
> I will post them later



Definitely post pics, I would love to see them!



> Saturday- I started getting ready for fall! I went around the yard and scooped up all of my garden treasures and put them in my garden shed. But not before I took a few hours to clean it out and organize it  so I can fit everything in there neatly. Now- I will just sit and wait patiently for DH to open it up and throw all of his JUNK in there and mess it up! Yes- he has a 30x40 polebarn and my teeny tiny little shed it hidden behind his, but he finds it necessary to put his junk in mine!- Men!
> 
> Any day now, I have to start putting up my Halloween decorations!



I have yet to collect all of my little garden ornaments, maybe next weekend.  I am definitely getting antsy to start putting out all of my Halloween decorations though.  I think we should post some pics after we have all completed our decorating, what do you ladies think?




Shyvioletisme said:


> my parents came in to visit for the day Saturday. We had a good time, went out and walked a little as well.
> Sunday was a pretty lazy day...watched some movies and lazed around!
> 
> Madd, I really had to tear myself away from all the awesome Halloween decorations at Garden Ridge Saturday when I was there...oh my goodness, they had some awesome stuff. We just don't have any outdoor space in which to put a lot of it, so none for me...
> 
> Tammy, I hope your foot feels better!!!



Thanks so much for the well wishes.

On the subject of shopping for Halloween, this year we will be coming home the day before Halloween so we will still be handing out candy for the very few kids we have in the neighborhood.  Each year DH says he is going to buy one of those fogger machines to make the house look spooky, I keep hoping he does (maybe this year!).  They have come out with so many unique and scary things to put in the yard it's not to go overboard with the spending!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I have yet to collect all of my little garden ornaments, maybe next weekend.  I am definitely getting antsy to start putting out all of my Halloween decorations though.  I think we should post some pics after we have all completed our decorating, what do you ladies think?



And gentlemen!! Sure- sounds fun!




> On the subject of shopping for Halloween, this year we will be coming home the day before Halloween so we will still be handing out candy for the very few kids we have in the neighborhood.  Each year DH says he is going to buy one of those fogger machines to make the house look spooky, I keep hoping he does (maybe this year!).  They have come out with so many unique and scary things to put in the yard it's not to go overboard with the spending!



A FOG MACHINE!! I will have to add that to my day after list!!!! Great idea! Thanks! 

Well- I have an update on my Savannah trip. Last week I thought I mentioned that we might stop somewhere to and from Savannah to give us a rest with the driving. Well- DH was actually the one who suggested it before I brought it up to him! 

On our way down we are going to stop in NC just to sleep. NOT much to see there.   On our way home, though, DH said he would like to stop in Williamsburg for a day or 2! I have to go and look up some ghost tours for Williamsburg now!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> And gentlemen!! Sure- sounds fun!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> A FOG MACHINE!! I will have to add that to my day after list!!!! Great idea! Thanks!
> 
> Well- I have an update on my Savannah trip. Last week I thought I mentioned that we might stop somewhere to and from Savannah to give us a rest with the driving. Well- DH was actually the one who suggested it before I brought it up to him!
> 
> On our way down we are going to stop in NC just to sleep. NOT much to see there.   On our way home, though, DH said he would like to stop in Williamsburg for a day or 2! I have to go and look up some ghost tours for Williamsburg now!




Oops, didn't mean to miss the guys, sorry guys, show your Halloween decoration pics! 

A fog machine is definitely a great day after purchase, if you can find them.  It seems like each year they actually run out of them before the date.  Good luck with that.  And your welcome for the idea!

Awesome, add a couple more days to the trip with Williamsburg.  I would love to go there too!  Definitely post your links when you find out about the ghost tours.


----------



## Mayhem2008

Just checking in with ya'll and notice we have hit page 250!  
Nothing is new. DH sees the Dr tomorrow so I'll gove you all the update on our other thread. I've been busy as hell getting things ready to go and running a gajillion errands. 
I had to have the oil changed and when they started the SUV the stereo was screaming out a little Dimmu. These were all younger guys and they were in shock that I was playing black metal One of them said "OMG how can you hear?" I informed him that I had actually turned it down when I pulled in! 
Hope you're all doing well. back to housework and cooking dinner! Oh BTW I had my hair done Friday. It's now a lovely deep plum color all over. It kinda looks dark brown but when I'm in the light you can see the color. I ditched the idea of going for the streaks and had the whole head done. I love it! She also cut off about 2 inches but it still goes down to my waist. Guess I could spare that much, eh?


----------



## maddhatir

Hey May- glad to hear from you!

Guess what? Dimmu is coming back to town! They are playing with Danzig- I think I might go. Amon Amarth will also be in town- however, we will be in NC, on our way to Savannah that day.

This past Wednesday we saw Opeth. OMG! So NOT what I expected......but pleasantly surprised! I went into the concert blind. I heard a few songs on Hard Attack and really liked them, however, never picked up a CD before the concert *ouch*

DH hit the nail on the head, describing them as having A.D.D.  They can be banging out a death metal tune, growling and crunching and then all of sudden....the song takes a turn......dead stop......to this mellow tune! I described them as this: death, black, psychodelic, stoner, jazz, jam BAND! All wrapped into one! Some of their songs would go on 15-20 minutes b/c they were just jamming with each other- It was awesome! They even sang a ballad! The fans were moshing like crazy in the pit one minute and chillin' with their lighters lit the next!

Crazy stuff I tell ya!

Well- good luck to DH tomorrow!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Oops, didn't mean to miss the guys, sorry guys, show your Halloween decoration pics!
> 
> A fog machine is definitely a great day after purchase, if you can find them.  It seems like each year they actually run out of them before the date.  Good luck with that.  And your welcome for the idea!
> 
> Awesome, add a couple more days to the trip with Williamsburg.  I would love to go there too!  Definitely post your links when you find out about the ghost tours.




Tammy do you have the large Halloween shops near you? They are usually Spirit or Halloween Adventure? The Spirit shop had A LOT to choose from the day after last year! Maybe you will be in luck. Actually I do think I remember some fog machines but did not go for them!

I love Williamsburg- I have been there once before (well, in addition to my other life ) and can't wait to go back!


----------



## zima-cheryl

TKDisneylover said:


> Happy Monday Everybody!  Okay, so not so much "happy" but we're into another week and heading for a new weekend!
> 
> How were your weekends?



Oh how I hate Mondays...

We did have an awesome weekend - it was the end of my birthday week! 
Yup - a whole week this year!  Next year I've already warned DH that turning 40 requires a birthday month!   
Of course I learn to day that WDW is giving free admission if you are there on your birthday in 2009!   
http://disneyparks.disney.go.com/disneyparks/en_US/minisites/freeOnYourBirthday/index

On Saturday I treated myself to a manicure & pedicure!  DH took me to a wonderful Italian restaurant in the N. end of Boston for supper & then we went to see Cirque's "Kooza".  Great Show!  It was a perfect day!  

Having such a great weekend makes dragging my fanny back into the office just that much harder!  Come on Powerball!


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Oh how I hate Mondays...
> 
> We did have an awesome weekend - it was the end of my birthday week!
> Yup - a whole week this year!  Next year I've already warned DH that turning 40 requires a birthday month!
> Of course I learn to day that WDW is giving free admission if you are there on your birthday in 2009!
> http://disneyparks.disney.go.com/disneyparks/en_US/minisites/freeOnYourBirthday/index
> 
> On Saturday I treated myself to a manicure & pedicure!  DH took me to a wonderful Italian restaurant in the N. end of Boston for supper & then we went to see Cirque's "Kooza".  Great Show!  It was a perfect day!
> 
> Having such a great weekend makes dragging my fanny back into the office just that much harder!  Come on Powerball!



 Happy Belated Birthday!!!​


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Tammy do you have the large Halloween shops near you? They are usually Spirit or Halloween Adventure? The Spirit shop had A LOT to choose from the day after last year! Maybe you will be in luck. Actually I do think I remember some fog machines but did not go for them!
> 
> I love Williamsburg- I have been there once before (well, in addition to my other life ) and can't wait to go back!



We have Halloween Express (which are seasonal), and then Bartz's Party Stores that have the large assortment of Halloween supplies.  Then all of the craft stores get in on the action too.  I did see a fog machine at Wal-mart in the past but DH was afraid of the quality.

Williamsburg will be like coming back home!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Mayhem2008 said:


> Just checking in with ya'll and notice we have hit page 250!
> Nothing is new. DH sees the Dr tomorrow so I'll gove you all the update on our other thread. I've been busy as hell getting things ready to go and running a gajillion errands.
> I had to have the oil changed and when they started the SUV the stereo was screaming out a little Dimmu. These were all younger guys and they were in shock that I was playing black metal One of them said "OMG how can you hear?" I informed him that I had actually turned it down when I pulled in!
> Hope you're all doing well. back to housework and cooking dinner! Oh BTW I had my hair done Friday. It's now a lovely deep plum color all over. It kinda looks dark brown but when I'm in the light you can see the color. I ditched the idea of going for the streaks and had the whole head done. I love it! She also cut off about 2 inches but it still goes down to my waist. Guess I could spare that much, eh?




Hey Mayhem!  Glad to finally hear from you!  Well wishes are headed your way for DH.  How is that knee you twisted doing, hopefully no residual pain?  Your hair color sounds very pretty, I love that plum color.  I had some copper color highlights added at my last cut.  I think I may have more added before our trip.  It's perfect for fall!  When do you leave for WDW, this Saturday?


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> Oh how I hate Mondays...
> 
> We did have an awesome weekend - it was the end of my birthday week!
> Yup - a whole week this year!  Next year I've already warned DH that turning 40 requires a birthday month!
> Of course I learn to day that WDW is giving free admission if you are there on your birthday in 2009!
> http://disneyparks.disney.go.com/disneyparks/en_US/minisites/freeOnYourBirthday/index
> 
> On Saturday I treated myself to a manicure & pedicure!  DH took me to a wonderful Italian restaurant in the N. end of Boston for supper & then we went to see Cirque's "Kooza".  Great Show!  It was a perfect day!
> 
> Having such a great weekend makes dragging my fanny back into the office just that much harder!  Come on Powerball!



  (belated)

Sounds like you had a great birthday!  I have not gotten pedicure in such a long time.  I used to have them everytime I would go on a trip, but since I "have" to live in tennis shoes now I don't even bother.  However we were going to spend more time hanging by the pool this trip (if weather permits) so maybe I will have one this time around.........

I honestly hate Monday's, if I did not have to use all of my vacation time, I would just work Tues-Fri.  My co-worker and I tried to convince the supervisors that it would be good to have us available after 4:30 when social workers bring their clients in for family meetings.  We would take turns working 10 hours days so that we could take Monday or Friday, unfortunately they did not agree. 

I think I need to start buying those Powerball tickets....


----------



## Disney Dreams

Hi All!

Sort of going through a hard time right now and thought maybe a few people on this thread might be able to bring a little smile to me - not easy atm.

Please don't flame me for posting on this thread, I truly am reaching out for support.

DH and I are in our late 30s.  We have always wanted children.  They were part of "the plan."  We initially said that we wanted to wait 5 years.  You know, travel, be "us," do our own thing together, etc....  Well... 5 became 6 became 7 became 8.  About 2 years ago, we decided we were ready.  We hadn't broken our adorable little doxie boy yet (LOL), so... let's think about kids.

Well, we had a few health issues that we were working on and resolved.  Next month is our 10 year annivsary (wow! already??) and we just (yesterday) found out for a variety of reasons, the odds of me being able to get pg are very small.  

I am just so very sad.  I have cried and cried and am just numb to the world around me atm.  We have a wonderful trip to WDW planned for our 10 year anniversary and I am SOOOO excited about our "2 big kids at WDW" trip, it is the only light in my world atm.  DH has told me not to be sad, reminding me that we have a great life together and that the 3 of us (me, DH, and DPup) can have lots of fun together without kids.

To me, there have always been kids in the future.  There seems to be this void at the thought of no kids.  Yes, almost all of our friends are parents.  Yes, we both love kids.  Yes, we can't stand the screaming, temper tantrum kids at Disneyland or anywhere else.  ("Those will never be MY kids."  )

So I guess what I am asking those of you here is... Do you feel a void in your lives?  Do you not get sad at the thought of never being a grandparent?  How did you know you never wanted kids?  Help me find the joy in the possibility of no children.  Thanks in advance for any genuine replies.

- Dreams

P.S.  As I type this, I can hear the neighbor's kids giggling as they play out front and I have tears in my eyes thinking that giggle may never be from one of mine.  Do none of you ever feel that?  Thanks again.


----------



## Barthy73

No voids here at all!  We both wanted kids when we got married but decided independently it wasn't for us.  We've got a spoiled rotten dog who doesn't mind being caged all day and won't want a driver's license or want go to go prom.  She'll never have a serious boyfriend, and she'll never get knocked up.  She even told us she'll likely never be married, so no wedding costs either!

When we see rotten, screaming kids, we always remind each other that we need to send Dr. Rice, my urologist who gave me the snip, a Christmas card!


----------



## maddhatir

I am sorry- I cannot offer any advice either  

I have absolutely zero void! It is all happiness inside of me and DH, no room for anythng else.  

I thought I saw a thread somewhere about couples who want kids but cannot have them? I am sorry, but I am unsure where it was on the Dis that I saw it.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

no void here either. Just don't feel anything missing. 

So , I know that I completely can't understand how you feel, but wanted to offer a suggestion...if it is not out of place...
since you and your DH obviously have a lot of love to offer a child, have you considered adoption? There are many wonderful children in need of homes in this country who would love to be placed in a family like yours with lots of love to give. Then if you ever did become pregnant it would just be an extra good thing...


----------



## zima-cheryl

Disney Dreams - you have my sympathy.  
I can't relate exactly, but I know what it is to want something & not be able to have it.   Only advice I can share is to allow yourself time to grieve that loss.  Over time it will get better.

Along w/the suggestion of adoption - have you looked at fostering?  Several of my nieces & nephews were originally foster children placed w/my brother.  And many years later they are now ours!

No void here...  I really never felt a burning desire for kids.  They just don't appeal to me.  I'd be miserable if we had children.  
Of course we are soooo busy there isn't room to think about it often.

Barthy - I like that idea!  Think we will have to send a card along to Dr. Case who made things permanant for us!  That is a good idea.  And I bet she would love it... how often do you think they really ever get that type of feedback?


----------



## PoohNTuck

double post


----------



## PoohNTuck

*Dreams*,

Just wanted to let you know that I understand where you're coming from.  Sometimes I want a child.  The want doesn't seem to last more than a few days but sometimes I do in fact want one.  I *always* point out cute kids when we're out too.  Can't help it, I love em.  I sometimes fantasize about what it would be like to have a clean, well-mannered blonde hair blue eyed mini me outfitted in a little ralph lauren cable knit and cords playing in the leaves this fall.  Yup, I do and I'm not afraid to admit here cause guess what, this group, albeit a lot different from me in *many *ways-- they don't judge me for my differences.  We have one common bond- we are adults and we aren't having kids.  And we share that.  And they understand me.  And this is where I come when I need to be reminded that there are lots of good things about choosing this path.  It is a choice.  You can adopt.  You can go through a billion rounds of fertility this that and the other thing.  Or you can make the decision to enjoy the benefits of a childfree lifestyle,  even if it wasn't in your original plans.  *We can't have it all, but we can be happy with what we have. * That's an important point.  

 
You're welcome here if you need this group.  Don't let the fangs and absinthe-laden heavy metal discussions freak you out 

On the other hand, I *always* groan and sigh when annoying children abound.  They're more prevalent than the cute ones where I live (that may be the case everywhere from reading many online forums).  DH and I work with children and enjoy spending time with them so we do that in our jobs.  You could volunteer with a youth organization, babysit for family or friends, or get a job that involves children if you'd like a daily fix too.  That really is plenty for me and I realize that I'm a better person for making the decision to limit my time with kids to those 40 hrs/week.  Plus, as a bonus, I'm paid and honored for my care of children (many moms don't get that!)! 

You see, I realize that my work of bathing/feeding/rocking/holding and loving are all paid hours.  Being up in the middle of the night, when I've already had my 8 hrs of sleep, is a completely different feeling than getting up for work after no sleep all night because I was up with a sick child.  Making breakfast for someone when I feel nauseous is not on my agenda.  MANY of my coworkers suffer from lack of sleep.  IT's debilitating.  They're unhappy and overtired and can only dream of the international vacations DH and I enjoy each year.  They don't have sex with their husbands.  They don't read books for pleasure.  They don't make choices about their lives anymore.  They MUST do things.  They coach teams, they work full-time, they are stuck... they couldn't make another choice if they wanted to.  

Maybe my needs weren't met appropriately as a kid. DH's parents sucked a lot, and I know his needs weren't met.  DH enjoys a stocked cupboard and playing his video games after work.  He's a simple man in many respects.  We enjoy financial security and free time in a stress-free and peaceful environment because we didn't have that growing up.  We also enjoy travelling, splurging on little treats, going out to restaurants, cracking a bottle of wine now and again, and enjoying our own personal enrichment activities (reading, hobbies, rest when we need it).  It's a choice we've made and I respect the choices other people have made when it comes to have children and honor their sacrifices.  Frankly, I don't know how (or why) they do it.  Most of the time when I ask how they say "You have to.  You just do it.  I don't know how I've functioned on less than 5 hrs of sleep the past 5 years... I just do it."

I'm sorry about your recent loss but I hope you can find the opportunity in all of this and make the best choices for you and DH ahead.  Any loss comes with a period of grief and redefining who you are and what you want.  Congratulations on 10 years together.  You guys are awesome!!!   

 Here's to the next 10 years and a new chapter of your life together...

PoohnTuck


----------



## PoohNTuck

*Hey all*
  DH and I have been enjoying our time off from classes together quite a bit  and we've taken these long unexplained absences to reexamine life and I appreciate that you guys are still here keeping on keepin' on  

*Cheryl* happy belated.  a cirque show- that may be on the agenda for my bday next year.  how wonderful!!!

*HELP ME PICK A NEW CITY!!!!!!!*
DH and I are considering our next life move.  I talked to you a bit ago about not really finding like minded friends here.  Now, don't get too excited- it's still a few years away but at least we've given it a tentative date since I last mentioned it and that date is fall 2012.  We don't know where we'll go.  We just plan to wrap up what we need to do here in the next 3-4 years and research where we ought to go next during this time.  If you'd like to make a case for your city (or urge us to avoid it) anytime in the next 3 years please feel free to step forward  

I've already gone into research mode to look at weather patterns (no snow please), crime rates (safety first) and taxes (you want me to pay for WHAT???!!).  We're down to about 30 states... we still have some whittling (is that spelled correctly) left to do!  What else should we consider to factor into our happy living plan????

I don't even know how we're going to do the final city choice... in a perfect world we'd take 3-5 weeklong trips to cities and communities researching life there.  Meet people.  Try the local restaurants and coffee shops.  Check out local real estate and apt complexes.  Meet the people.  Check out local dog parks.  Check out the work opportunities/interview.  Just try to get a sincere feel for the place beyond the major tourist sites and shops.  But I suspect each of those trips would cost approx $1500-2000/week (more if plane fares continue to rise!) considering the cost of airfare, a cheap but clean hotel and meals, as well as a rental car and gas (only way to get around most of these places efficiently and really dig in for research purposes).  Maybe I'll only get 1 job offer and we'll go there.  I suspect, if nothing changes, that I'll have multiple job offers and there will be much to consider as the time draws near.  

Thoughts, suggestions...for a) narrowing down the list of possible places without eliminating too much (we'd like to save the severe narrowing it down for 3 years from now when we have both the new crime statistics and job availability/salary v cost of living comparison) and b) choosing 1 of five or ten finalist cities???

Hope all are doing well... 
PoohnTuck


----------



## TKDisneylover

Dreams,

Sorry to hear that your original plans are not going as hoped, but like others have asked, have your considered adoption or foster parenting?  I have a good friend who became a foster parent after many years of trying to get pg and the docs saying it will never happen.  She & her DH are very happy with 2 beautiful boys they were foster parents for an then adopted.  And I have another friend who adopted one child from China and are very happy with their decision to go that route.

DH & I knew before getting married that we did not want children, no void here, and definitely no sad thoughts about not being grandparents.  We are very happy sharing each others company and enjoy the peace and quiet of our home with our DDog.  We come and go as we please, take trips whenever it works with "our" schedule, and especially enjoy WDW as big kids.  Our money is ours, no worries about college tuition.  I have to say we enjoy each others company so much that children would have gotten in the way of that.

I know too many people who have children and are unhappy, they envy us for our decision not to have kids.  One does not sleep in the same bedroom as her spouse, another has taken back a spouse who had an affair because she doesn't want to be a single parent, and another who wanted lots & lots of kids ended up with four, one who is autistic, the DH bolted after 6 years, and flew to Vegas with his new girlfriend.  I don't mean to make you sad with this stuff, but it's what happens and when DH & I see all of that happening it just makes us that much more happier to be just us.

I wish you well in your future, and if you ever want to stop in and chat please stop by.  As a previous poster mentioned we are all friendly and open minded to chat.  Have a happy anniversary and enjoy your vacation at WDW!


----------



## maddhatir

PoohNTuck said:


> *HELP ME PICK A NEW CITY!!!!!!!
> DH and I are considering our next life move.  I talked to you a bit ago about not really finding like minded friends here.  Now, don't get too excited- it's still a few years away but at least we've given it a tentative date since I last mentioned it and that date is fall 2012.  We don't know where we'll go.  We just plan to wrap up what we need to do here in the next 3-4 years and research where we ought to go next during this time.  If you'd like to make a case for your city (or urge us to avoid it) anytime in the next 3 years please feel free to step forward
> 
> 
> PoohnTuck*


*

PnT- First- where is it that you live? You sound just like DH and I- we want to be out of NJ in about 6 years. I will tell you NOT to come to NJ! The property taxes and auto insurance alone will KILL you! One plus, you do not have to pump your own gas! 

I was going to add- not that anyone would WANT to move to NJ, however, it seems like our area continues to grow and there are so many new developments going up- someone must be making the pilgrimage here! I cannot tell you the last time I seen a small house being built!? Who do people need these large houses I will never know!? DH and I say all the time- if you are going to spend 600 grand on real estate, why not build a house big enough to suit your needs and use the rest of the $$ for all of the land around you Oh well, I guess not only are we child-free we also have different priorities than most of the people in this country. We do not need to be concerned with schools or being in a neighborhood so that our kids have someone to play with. 

Anyway- I am hoping to move somewhere in VA. However, MD, NC and MAYBE the northern part of SC would be an option for us. We would like to stay on the East coast. 

I messed around with this site: Your Top Spots You have to take the quiz.

I also use City Data for stats.

My head spins when I look at all of this. I want a VERY small town, of course, low crime, and we want to buy about 10 acres so we are secluded. I love the Charlottesville VA area- it is beautiful, however, DH does not want to be too far from water for his boat.  I would prefer a nice quiet lake in the middle of nowhere. 

So what sites have you used- I would like to add them to my list!*


----------



## Barthy73

maddhatir said:


> MAYBE the northern part of SC would be an option for us.



We moved to the Upstate (Greenville/Spartanburg) are of South Carolina a little over six years ago and absolutely LOVE it here.  We're 2 hours from Atlanta, less than 2 hours from Charlotte.   One hour to the mountains, and 3 hours to the beach.  It's a perfect location, and housing costs are still quite reasonable.

If anyone ever makes their way this way for a visit, we'd be happy to show you around or offer any advice we're able to share.


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> We moved to the Upstate (Greenville/Spartanburg) are of South Carolina a little over six years ago and absolutely LOVE it here.  We're 2 hours from Atlanta, less than 2 hours from Charlotte.   One hour to the mountains, and 3 hours to the beach.  It's a perfect location, and housing costs are still quite reasonable.
> 
> If anyone ever makes their way this way for a visit, we'd be happy to show you around or offer any advice we're able to share.



DH would die if he heard 3 hours from the beach!


----------



## Barthy73

3 Hours from beach = No Hurricanes

3 Hours from beach = still easy drive, and no hurricanes.


----------



## maddhatir

Barthy73 said:


> 3 Hours from beach = No Hurricanes
> 
> 3 Hours from beach = still easy drive, and no hurricanes.



ugh- I forgot about how many hurricanes you people get down there!! 

Maybe I will nix the thought of NC, or even the idea of the southern part of VA   Even though we are 40 minutes from the ocean right now, our area does not get the nasty storms you do down South!


----------



## TKDisneylover

PoohNTuck said:


> *Hey all*
> DH and I have been enjoying our time off from classes together quite a bit  and we've taken these long unexplained absences to reexamine life and I appreciate that you guys are still here keeping on keepin' on
> 
> *Cheryl* happy belated.  a cirque show- that may be on the agenda for my bday next year.  how wonderful!!!
> 
> *HELP ME PICK A NEW CITY!!!!!!!*
> DH and I are considering our next life move.  I talked to you a bit ago about not really finding like minded friends here.  Now, don't get too excited- it's still a few years away but at least we've given it a tentative date since I last mentioned it and that date is fall 2012.  We don't know where we'll go.  We just plan to wrap up what we need to do here in the next 3-4 years and research where we ought to go next during this time.  If you'd like to make a case for your city (or urge us to avoid it) anytime in the next 3 years please feel free to step forward
> 
> I've already gone into research mode to look at weather patterns (no snow please), crime rates (safety first) and taxes (you want me to pay for WHAT???!!).  We're down to about 30 states... we still have some whittling (is that spelled correctly) left to do!  What else should we consider to factor into our happy living plan????
> 
> I don't even know how we're going to do the final city choice... in a perfect world we'd take 3-5 weeklong trips to cities and communities researching life there.  Meet people.  Try the local restaurants and coffee shops.  Check out local real estate and apt complexes.  Meet the people.  Check out local dog parks.  Check out the work opportunities/interview.  Just try to get a sincere feel for the place beyond the major tourist sites and shops.  But I suspect each of those trips would cost approx $1500-2000/week (more if plane fares continue to rise!) considering the cost of airfare, a cheap but clean hotel and meals, as well as a rental car and gas (only way to get around most of these places efficiently and really dig in for research purposes).  Maybe I'll only get 1 job offer and we'll go there.  I suspect, if nothing changes, that I'll have multiple job offers and there will be much to consider as the time draws near.
> 
> Thoughts, suggestions...for a) narrowing down the list of possible places without eliminating too much (we'd like to save the severe narrowing it down for 3 years from now when we have both the new crime statistics and job availability/salary v cost of living comparison) and b) choosing 1 of five or ten finalist cities???
> 
> Hope all are doing well...
> PoohnTuck



PNT,

Wish I could help you with this one, but like Madd, DH & I are planning to move within the next 10 years ourselves.  We have always said we would retire down in the Gulf, that would be Gulf Shores/Orange Beach, Alabama to be specific.  And yes, this is a big hurricane spot, but we were planning to purchase a condo (top floor where the storm surge, water damage, sand, etc. cannot reach), with the Phoenix Properties (a prime condo builder that are always "the" first to be back up and running after any storm event, they have their own construction company).  We have seen how the condos are built and that they are built to sustain in hurricane winds & the first couple floors that do get damaged are typically the underground parking, pool & fitness areas & offices.  Alot of times the first floor of condos can be damaged but they are made for easy clean-up and repair.  So in other words we feel very confident about moving to this destination.  And since we have family in Wisconsin, we can always come back temporarily until things are back up and running.

Good luck in your search to find a new destination!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> I messed around with this site: Your Top Spots You have to take the quiz.
> 
> I also use City Data for stats.



Thanks for sharing these sights, it's been fun seeing what they suggest for us.  I actually saw a couple destinations that would be interesting to check out.  We may just have to change our minds about Gulf Shores!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Barthy73 said:


> We moved to the Upstate (Greenville/Spartanburg) are of South Carolina a little over six years ago and absolutely LOVE it here.  We're 2 hours from Atlanta, less than 2 hours from Charlotte.   One hour to the mountains, and 3 hours to the beach.  It's a perfect location, and housing costs are still quite reasonable.
> 
> If anyone ever makes their way this way for a visit, we'd be happy to show you around or offer any advice we're able to share.




When I did the quiz that Madd gave the link to these were some of the cities that came up for me: Beaufort, S.C., Myrtle, S.C., Hilton Head-Sun City Hilton Head, S.C. & Aiken, S.C.

Do you know anything about these places?  Just curious.


----------



## maddhatir

Someone needs to talk me down!

Just just finished making DH one his "raw dishes" that called for 5 cups of carrots *bleck* the dish is horrible. I pulled out the food processor. I had shredded carrots all over the kitchen, my hands were orange, my sink was orange..... 

I am ready to have a nice greasy cheeseburger- and *I* am the one who is a vegetarian!!!! Help!  

I am counting down the days until he is normal again!


----------



## zima-cheryl

PoohNTuck said:


> *Cheryl* happy belated.  a cirque show- that may be on the agenda for my bday next year.  how wonderful!!!



You should definately catch a Cirque show!  Have you seen any of them?  If so you know how awesome they are, if not boy-o-boy are you in for a treat!!

It has become an expensive addiction for me!  Waiting for the Vegas tour...no gambling for me, I'll be too busy trying to catch the 5 resident shows they have out there!   

Regarding the move... have you considered someplace like Virginia?  North enough to have seasons, but not much, if any snow?  I have an aunt who lives there & just loves the area.


----------



## maddhatir

zima-cheryl said:


> Regarding the move... have you considered someplace like Virginia?  North enough to have seasons, but not much, if any snow?  I have an aunt who lives there & just loves the area.




I cannot imagine NOT having seasons! Not seeing leaves changing colors, the snow, everything coming back to life in the spring......I think the changing seasons are like Mother Nature's canvas! Corny, I know- but beautiful! 

How can you live without that? DH says he wants to move someplace where it is always warm....I just can't do it. This is why I want to stay a bit north and on the East Coast.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> I cannot imagine NOT having seasons! Not seeing leaves changing colors, the snow, everything coming back to life in the spring......I think the changing seasons are like Mother Nature's canvas! Corny, I know- but beautiful!
> 
> How can you live without that? DH says he wants to move someplace where it is always warm....I just can't do it. This is why I want to stay a bit north and on the East Coast.



you know Madd, when you've never had real season you don't have anything to miss. I mean here we have sorta cool, hot and really really hot. Not much in between...I wish we lived somewhere with real seasons.


----------



## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> you know Madd, when you've never had real season you don't have anything to miss. I mean here we have sorta cool, hot and really really hot. Not much in between...I wish we lived somewhere with real seasons.



I know *you* do not know what you are missing, but *I* know what you are missing- and you just can't continue to miss something so spectacular! 

Hey- how did we make it to page 252!?


----------



## zima-cheryl

maddhatir said:


> Hey- how did we make it to page 252!?



We're just special!


----------



## topmonkeygirl

I too never wanted any kids, siince I was a kid I knew I didn't!  I'm almost 39 and just today someone said "Oh you'll change your mind".  When?  When I'm 60?  People have been saying that my whole life and I still haven't changed it.  Yes it gets me furious for someone to tell me that.  Who are you and how do you know me so well as to know what I want?  Why are you butting into someone else's personal business?  Mind your own!!!!!!!!  
It's like complete strangers telling me smoking is bad.  No joke it's not 1930 anymore and DR.'s aren't telling people to smoke like they use to.   I think 99.9% of Americans know it's bad, so why are you butting into my business.  Thanks for letting me rant.


----------



## TKDisneylover

topmonkeygirl said:


> I too never wanted any kids, siince I was a kid I knew I didn't!  I'm almost 39 and just today someone said "Oh you'll change your mind".  When?  When I'm 60?  People have been saying that my whole life and I still haven't changed it.  Yes it gets me furious for someone to tell me that.  Who are you and how do you know me so well as to know what I want?  Why are you butting into someone else's personal business?  Mind your own!!!!!!!!
> It's like complete strangers telling me smoking is bad.  No joke it's not 1930 anymore and DR.'s aren't telling people to smoke like they use to.   I think 99.9% of Americans know it's bad, so why are you butting into my business.  Thanks for letting me rant.



​

It still amazes me that people would think at 39 you would change your mind.  No offense to people who wait longer, get their career started, etc. to have kids.  But I'm sorry I cannot imagine chasing children around in my 40's!   Just my opinion.....

Just a head up, this thread will be coming to an end soon.  We have started a new thread here:  http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1942733, stop on over!


----------



## Little_Sister

We don't want kids...never have, never will...and no folks. we won't change our minds....

But what really gets me, are the folks that have the audacity to say if you don't experience parenthood you will never understand what real love is...where the heck does this logic come from???  

It's just rude and completely close minded mixed with a little BS.


----------



## Shyvioletisme

Little_Sister said:


> We don't want kids...never have, never will...and no folks. we won't change our minds....
> 
> But what really gets me, are the folks that have the audacity to say if you don't experience parenthood you will never understand what real love is...where the heck does this logic come from???
> 
> It's just rude and completely close minded mixed with a little BS.



yup heard it before as well! and welcome fellow North Texan!!!!


----------



## Little_Sister

Shyvioletisme said:


> yup heard it before as well! and welcome fellow North Texan!!!!



Howdy...and isn't that just crazy talk????


----------



## Shyvioletisme

Little_Sister said:


> Howdy...and isn't that just crazy talk????



yes...even one of my friends who doesn't have kids yet has been bugging me lately about it...You see, she's engaged and getting married in March and she and her DF want 3 kids...I'm actually quite surprised they don't have one already and she keeps expecting me to change my mind...Her fiance thinks there's something wrong with my DH and I for not wanting kids and just can't understand it.   But whatever, I think they just want us to have kids, because none of our other close friends are even close to dating anyone or kids, so they want us to have some so that our kids could grow up together  ...not gonna happen at all...


----------



## Little_Sister

Shyvioletisme said:


> yes...even one of my friends who doesn't have kids yet has been bugging me lately about it...You see, she's engaged and getting married in March and she and her DF want 3 kids...I'm actually quite surprised they don't have one already and she keeps expecting me to change my mind...Her fiance thinks there's something wrong with my DH and I for not wanting kids and just can't understand it.   But whatever, I think they just want us to have kids, because none of our other close friends are even close to dating anyone or kids, so they want us to have some so that our kids could grow up together  ...not gonna happen at all...



ugh I know exactly what you are saying...I don't understand this push that a lot of people have towards this topic...

Honestly I don't always feel that people really want kids, but moreso that they think they _should _want kinds.

We've been taught that there are certain steps to life...go to school, go to college, get a job, get married, have kids, die...

I think anyone who breaks from this traditional path...it confuses the others that feel that's what's "supposed" to happen in life...that this is what is expected of them....last time I checked, there weren't any set rules for this stuff, people...

I think if most people asked themselves "do I really want this" instead of just following the traditional path...there would be a hell of a lot less unhappy individuals and probably a hell of a lot less divorce and mid-life crisis...just my extremely amateur psych opinon. 

Kudos to those that really know what the want...whether it's kids or no kids.


----------



## TKDisneylover

Little_Sister said:


> We don't want kids...never have, never will...and no folks. we won't change our minds....
> 
> But what really gets me, are the folks that have the audacity to say if you don't experience parenthood you will never understand what real love is...where the heck does this logic come from???
> 
> It's just rude and completely close minded mixed with a little BS.




​
My DH & I are right there with you, have been for the 27 years we've been together (dated/lived together 6 & married for 21 years).  Thankfully it's almost the norm in our family, I have two sibs, a brother who had 1 child and my sister & her DH chose not to have kids.  And in DH's family he's got four sibs, 2 sisters who are married both chose not to have kids, and his 1 brother had 1 kid and his other brother adopted the children that his now wife had from a previous relationship.  People think that is pretty odd, but I think we just know what we want out of our lives and it's not kids!

We truly enjoy our time we have together, we don't get bored, we're not worried about who will take care of us when we get older.  We have close families so they will be there for us as we will for them.  And you can't beat being able to pick up and go and travel whenever we want.  It's total "bliss"!


----------



## TKDisneylover

It's been very quiet on the thread lately, where is everyone?  Madd, get any emails from Disney, maybe something from Mayhem about how her and DH are doing?

I had my Dr. Appt. with the orthopedic surgeon, he thinks it's the broken bone that's causing all the problems with my ankle but he's afraid to take it out because of all the tendons & nerves around it, so he sent me for an MRI last Friday.  Tomorrow I find out the results, hopefully they will find something other than the bone problem and be able to start treating whatever it is that trashing my ankle!  And in the meantime I'm home with a nasty little virus that my DH & co-worker combined probably gave to me, at least I'm getting it before our Disney trip.

Hope everyone is doing well!


----------



## Shyvioletisme

TKDisneylover said:


> It's been very quiet on the thread lately, where is everyone?  Madd, get any emails from Disney, maybe something from Mayhem about how her and DH are doing?
> 
> I had my Dr. Appt. with the orthopedic surgeon, he thinks it's the broken bone that's causing all the problems with my ankle but he's afraid to take it out because of all the tendons & nerves around it, so he sent me for an MRI last Friday.  Tomorrow I find out the results, hopefully they will find something other than the bone problem and be able to start treating whatever it is that trashing my ankle!  And in the meantime I'm home with a nasty little virus that my DH & co-worker combined probably gave to me, at least I'm getting it before our Disney trip.
> 
> Hope everyone is doing well!




Tammy, I'll keep my fingers crossed for your MRI results...hopefully it will be something easier to treat...
btw...hope you feel better!! Seems like lots of viruses are going around everywhere


----------



## Little_Sister

TKDisneylover said:


> ​
> My DH & I are right there with you, have been for the 27 years we've been together (dated/lived together 6 & married for 21 years).  Thankfully it's almost the norm in our family, I have two sibs, a brother who had 1 child and my sister & her DH chose not to have kids.  And in DH's family he's got four sibs, 2 sisters who are married both chose not to have kids, and his 1 brother had 1 kid and his other brother adopted the children that his now wife had from a previous relationship.  People think that is pretty odd, but I think we just know what we want out of our lives and it's not kids!
> 
> We truly enjoy our time we have together, we don't get bored, we're not worried about who will take care of us when we get older.  We have close families so they will be there for us as we will for them.  And you can't beat being able to pick up and go and travel whenever we want.  It's total "bliss"!



Yep...I have 2 sisters and a brother...we range in age from 34 to 43...none of us have ever considered having children...not that we don't care for children...they're just not for us...we love our lives just as they are...

...and you're right it is TOTAL BLISS!


----------



## TKDisneylover

Shyvioletisme said:


> Tammy, I'll keep my fingers crossed for your MRI results...hopefully it will be something easier to treat...
> btw...hope you feel better!! Seems like lots of viruses are going around everywhere



Thanks Tiffany!  Yep, lots of viruses going around.  My DH is a custodian in an elementary school and brought it home first and now it's going around at my work.  It's amazing to watch the progression of it coming down our hallway, it starts at one end and makes it's way to our office.  Out of 48 of us, there have been at least 3 people gone sick each week starting a month ago.  We figure it's from all the "recirculated" air in our building, kind of like an airplane.



Little_Sister said:


> Yep...I have 2 sisters and a brother...we range in age from 34 to 43...none of us have ever considered having children...not that we don't care for children...they're just not for us...we love our lives just as they are...
> 
> ...and you're right it is TOTAL BLISS!


----------



## maddhatir

Little_Sister said:


> We don't want kids...never have, never will...and no folks. we won't change our minds....



Welcome Little Sister! 



TKDisneylover said:


> It's been very quiet on the thread lately, where is everyone?  Madd, get any emails from Disney, maybe something from Mayhem about how her and DH are doing?



No nothing from Mayhem! I know when I go to Disney I forget about the real world 



> I had my Dr. Appt. with the orthopedic surgeon, he thinks it's the broken bone that's causing all the problems with my ankle but he's afraid to take it out because of all the tendons & nerves around it, so he sent me for an MRI last Friday.  Tomorrow I find out the results, hopefully they will find something other than the bone problem and be able to start treating whatever it is that trashing my ankle!  And in the meantime I'm home with a nasty little virus that my DH & co-worker combined probably gave to me, at least I'm getting it before our Disney trip.
> 
> Hope everyone is doing well!



Let us know the results- good luck. And sorry you feel yucky Is it that time of the year again when all the little rug-rats spread their germs to everyone UGH.

Little story- my cousin and his wife had their first baby Saturday. It was a little girl. Of course, they are clueless just like any new parents would be. We went to visit them in the hospital. Well the baby starts crying a little and his wife asks for a pacifier. We looked around and there was not one in the room. I walked up to the nurses stations and said "Hi, um, I am here to get a pacifier for the baby, _we don't think one came with the room_"...... 

Hey- there are diapers in the room, I found out why there are no pacifiers- some moms do not like to give one to the baby- so you have to ask for one. 

We thought the hospital was like a hotel and it came equipped with everything you might need  

I found this funny too- one of my other cousins asked where the nanny was (of course joking) and MY name came up as a possible nanny!  I bluntly put it this way "No thanks, I am sorry- I do not really like kids"

In all the years DH and I have been together no one really ever asked us why we do not have kids Well, I just had to break the news to some of them after all these years! 

Believe it or not, my cousin who's wife just had the baby was never fond of kids- it would always be us 3 (my cousin, me and DH) when there was a kids party huddled in a corner with the look of pain in our faces Not anymore! My cousin would not even eat the cake b/c the kids spit all over it when they blew out the candles He would actually get mad


----------



## zima-cheryl

TKDisneylover said:


> Thanks Tiffany!  Yep, lots of viruses going around.  My DH is a custodian in an elementary school and brought it home first and now it's going around at my work.  It's amazing to watch the progression of it coming down our hallway, it starts at one end and makes it's way to our office.  Out of 48 of us, there have been at least 3 people gone sick each week starting a month ago.  We figure it's from all the "recirculated" air in our building, kind of like an airplane.



Just wondering... do you have a communal candy dish in the office?  I avoid those like the plague now!!!  One person w/a cold dipping into a jar of skittles & everyone is sick.

Another thing to think about; at DH's office they have a palm scanner to get in/out.  Since they started wiping that down w/the clorox wipes people have been much healthier in his office.  

It is amazing... it just takes 1 person & next thing you know the whole office has it!


----------



## TKDisneylover

zima-cheryl said:


> Just wondering... do you have a communal candy dish in the office?  I avoid those like the plague now!!!  One person w/a cold dipping into a jar of skittles & everyone is sick.
> 
> Another thing to think about; at DH's office they have a palm scanner to get in/out.  Since they started wiping that down w/the clorox wipes people have been much healthier in his office.
> 
> It is amazing... it just takes 1 person & next thing you know the whole office has it!



No communal candy dish on my desk, especially since I've been low-carbing it prepping for the WDW trip.  I'm actually a germaphobe, people at work make fun of me because I'm always cleaning my desk, switchboard, computer, etc. with Lysol wipes.  I'm the one who points out the things that people do to pass on germs like putting pens in their mouths, not washing hands, touching their faces too much.  I think this little virus was just destined to get me, especially with my co-worker hacking & sneezing away and then DH also had the exact same thing (and there was no kissing allowed!).  I am constantly changing hand towels, soaking the toothbrush in boiling water, changing the bedding.  I was out sick 2 days this week, it hit me hard, maybe because I have not had a cold/virus in over a year.  But I'm feeling better today, thanks to Mucinex & Mucinez D, that stuff really helps clear things up!

Now I'm looking forward to feeling good for the weekend so we can start doing all of our yard clean up and start putting up the HALLOWEEN decorations.  I'm very excited about that!  I love the fall, it's my favorite time of year and even though everything is starting to die and we start getting ready for winter.  There's just something about the smell in the air!

Oh my gosh Cheryl I just noticed your ticker!  You only have 7 more days to go before your trip!  Have you started packing yet?!


----------



## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Let us know the results- good luck. And sorry you feel yucky Is it that time of the year again when all the little rug-rats spread their germs to everyone UGH.



Okay, even though I was pretty darn sick Wednesday and off of work I went to the orthopedic surgeon to get the results of my MRI.  I think he actually felt bad for me because I was so sick with this darn virus.  Anywayyyyyy, I have an inflamed tendon around my ankle and much more arthritis over the top of my foot caused by an old injury.  He gave me a high dose ibuprofen to take twice a day to take away the inflamation.  He said the inflamation is caused by the way I walk, something about my foot twisting when I walk because I have a fallen arch.  So this brings us back to the podorthist I saw 3 weeks ago, I called him yesterday to make an appointment so that he can tweak my orthotics since I'm still feeling the discomfort in my ankle when I walk on it.  He does not have any appointments available until next Wednesday, so until then I will continue taking the meds.  At least I will have the the meds to get me through the trip should I need them.

He also said it was good that I did not have a "torn" tendon, that would have been much worse.  But if this persists and does not go away I may need to have surgery.  They would take muscle from another area and replace the inflamed muscle, that's a route I do not want to take so I also asked about losing more weight, he said that would definitely help (of course!).  So I will continue low-carbing, at this point I have lost 11 pounds. 

I'm keeping positive thoughts and moving forward.  Thanks to everyone for sending good energy my way, it totally helped!  Have a great day everyone!


----------



## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Okay, even though I was pretty darn sick Wednesday and off of work I went to the orthopedic surgeon to get the results of my MRI.  I think he actually felt bad for me because I was so sick with this darn virus.  Anywayyyyyy, I have an inflamed tendon around my ankle and much more arthritis over the top of my foot caused by an old injury.  He gave me a high dose ibuprofen to take twice a day to take away the inflamation.  He said the inflamation is caused by the way I walk, something about my foot twisting when I walk because I have a fallen arch.  So this brings us back to the podorthist I saw 3 weeks ago, I called him yesterday to make an appointment so that he can tweak my orthotics since I'm still feeling the discomfort in my ankle when I walk on it.  He does not have any appointments available until next Wednesday, so until then I will continue taking the meds.  At least I will have the the meds to get me through the trip should I need them.
> 
> He also said it was good that I did not have a "torn" tendon, that would have been much worse.  But if this persists and does not go away I may need to have surgery.  They would take muscle from another area and replace the inflamed muscle, that's a route I do not want to take so I also asked about losing more weight, he said that would definitely help (of course!).  So I will continue low-carbing, at this point I have lost 11 pounds.
> 
> I'm keeping positive thoughts and moving forward.  Thanks to everyone for sending good energy my way, it totally helped!  Have a great day everyone!




Keep taking your meds and hopefully the pod doc can tweak you (kinda sounds fun ) before your trip and maybe that will give you additional relief along with the meds!

Congrats on the 11 lbs!!!!!! Keep it up! 

DH will be done detoxing on Sunday- He lost a lot of weight- he did not even need to!! He lost over 10lbs but I cannot really tell, he can't even wear his belt b/c it is too big. Before the detox he walked around losing his pants I don't know what he is going to do now! Maybe I can get him a nice lookin' rope to tie around his waist 

I wonder how May and DH are making out in Disney, I want to see pics!!- I forget when she is supposed to come home?

Tammy- (or anyone else here) have you been watching True Blood!!!! I LUV it- and OMG- now that Eric is in the pic- it is even better Sookie cracks me up b/c she just tells Eric the way it is I was glued to the screen when Bill's fangs came out when the cop pulled them over and Bill got him to hand over his gun to him!! Can you imagine, their first date and he does that? I would melt!  

I am listening to Type O right now and I want Peter (in my siggy) to bite me His voice drives me crazy!!!


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## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Keep taking your meds and hopefully the pod doc can tweak you (kinda sounds fun ) before your trip and maybe that will give you additional relief along with the meds!



Will do!  Oh, by the way, the pod doc is tweakin' my orthotics not me!  What's on your mind this morning?  Oh wait, I know, it's Peter the Vampire! 



> Congrats on the 11 lbs!!!!!! Keep it up!



Thank you very much, I'm finally out of carb withdrawal.  One thing I found out though is not to trust any of the flavored alcohols.  They definitely set me back, so now the only thing I drink when having a cocktail is Sapphire Gin & Diet Tonic.



> DH will be done detoxing on Sunday- He lost a lot of weight- he did not even need to!! He lost over 10lbs but I cannot really tell, he can't even wear his belt b/c it is too big. Before the detox he walked around losing his pants I don't know what he is going to do now! Maybe I can get him a nice lookin' rope to tie around his waist



I cannot believe your DH is dropping so much weight!  Definitely give him a nice lookin' rope, just like Capt. Jack!   



> I wonder how May and DH are making out in Disney, I want to see pics!!- I forget when she is supposed to come home?



I've thought of her often as the week has gone by wondering how her DH is doing with the scooter and bum knee.  I agree I would like to see some pics too.



> Tammy- (or anyone else here) have you been watching True Blood!!!! I LUV it- and OMG- now that Eric is in the pic- it is even better Sookie cracks me up b/c she just tells Eric the way it is I was glued to the screen when Bill's fangs came out when the cop pulled them over and Bill got him to hand over his gun to him!! Can you imagine, their first date and he does that? I would melt!
> 
> I am listening to Type O right now and I want Peter (in my siggy) to bite me His voice drives me crazy!!!



DH and I are glued to the t.v. every Sunday night.  And I definitely love, love Bill, he can bite my neck any time .  And I liked the part when Sookie meets Eric and then later starts telling them what's going to happen with the bust!

I'm not a big southern twangin' kind of music lover (or whatever you call that type of music they play for the intro), but I really like that song.  However they could leave out the dead animals they show while playing it, but that's just me.


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## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> I'm not a big southern twangin' kind of music lover (or whatever you call that type of music they play for the intro), but I really like that song.  However they could leave out the dead animals they show while playing it, but that's just me.



I like the beginning- I find it haunting, creepy- or disturbing, something like that- I LUV almost anything Chris Isaak does or sings. Everytime I hear the song before the show, I think, OMG- How great would it be if they just gave Chris a bit part as a vampire on the show! Please, Please! He would be delish as a vampire.

Chris has such a great sense of humor- I am sure he would be up for it!

We saw Chris a few times in concert- and he is, believe it or not, hilarious!!! He tells these goofy stories between songs that just crack you up. And his suits are crazy! He is SO hot, but he is not full of himself, I like that! He is goofy.


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## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> I like the beginning- I find it haunting, creepy- or disturbing, something like that- I LUV almost anything Chris Isaak does or sings. Everytime I hear the song before the show, I think, OMG- How great would it be if they just gave Chris a bit part as a vampire on the show! Please, Please! He would be delish as a vampire.
> 
> Chris has such a great sense of humor- I am sure he would be up for it!
> 
> We saw Chris a few times in concert- and he is, believe it or not, hilarious!!! He tells these goofy stories between songs that just crack you up. And his suits are crazy! He is SO hot, but he is not full of himself, I like that! He is goofy.



ooh another Chris Isaak fan!! DH and I LOVE him!!! and I think he's yummy


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## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> ooh another Chris Isaak fan!! DH and I LOVE him!!! and I think he's yummy




Have you seen him live?! He puts on a great show. 

Do you remember when he used to have a show on TV? I forget the channel- it was a long time ago- he used to have a mermaid or something in a tank, or was that just a girl- my memory does NOT serve me well


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## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> Have you seen him live?! He puts on a great show.
> 
> Do you remember when he used to have a show on TV? I forget the channel- it was a long time ago- he used to have a mermaid or something in a tank, or was that just a girl- my memory does NOT serve me well



no we haven't seen him  
But I do remember the show!!! It was awesome!!! Hmm..you could be right about the mermaid..or we could both just be crazy


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## maddhatir

Shyvioletisme said:


> no we haven't seen him
> But I do remember the show!!! It was awesome!!! Hmm..you could be right about the mermaid..or we could both just be crazy



 It was a mermaid, I Googled it His show was on Showtime in 2001.

I got DH hooked on Chris when he heard "Baja Sessions"!


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## TKDisneylover




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## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


>



What are you doing to me!? I said before- I would not give this guy a second look until I saw him as a vampire!  Another thing he does well is, the evil eye thing- he always looks so serious, like in the pic  

Since we are posting pics of vampires- how about Peter and his real fangs- look close!  (a pic I took from the Philly concert)


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## maddhatir

How about Eric!!!





Check this out!


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## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> What are you doing to me!? I said before- I would not give this guy a second look until I saw him as a vampire!  Another thing he does well is, the evil eye thing- he always looks so serious, like in the pic



 



> Since we are posting pics of vampires- how about Peter and his real fangs- look close!  (a pic I took from the Philly concert)



I remember this photo, your too funny!

By the way, did you say that Chris Isaak sings the theme song for True Blood?  It definitely sounds like him, I loved the song, is it Wicked Minds?  Where he does the black & white video with Michael Hutchins (may he rest in peace!) old girlfriend, what's her name........ I know Helena Christenson!  Anyway, I thought the song "Bad Things" is sung by some dude named Jace Everett.  I could be wrong but I thought that's what the credits said because I was going to look for a cd or something.

And I really like that pic of Eric, I cannot access most of that stuff here at work, I keep getting entertainment blocks.  Speaking of work I suppose I better get back to it, again!

I'll leave you with this one.....


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## maddhatir

TKDisneylover said:


> Anyway, I thought the song "Bad Things" is sung by some dude named Jace Everett.  I could be wrong but I thought that's what the credits said because I was going to look for a cd or something.



OMG! I am so embarrased!   You are right about the song- I went on and on about Chris 

Look- I found this on The Suburban Vampire site while doing a search for the song:

*Monday, September 29, 2008*

*True Blood theme song--no, it's not Chris Isaak *

_For those of you simply looking for more info about the True Blood theme song, the title is "Bad Things" by Jace Everett. No, it's not Chris Isaak._


I guess I am not the only ding dong!!!!


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## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> OMG! I am so embarrased!   You are right about the song- I went on and on about Chris
> 
> Look- I found this on The Suburban Vampire site while doing a search for the song:
> 
> *Monday, September 29, 2008*
> 
> *True Blood theme song--no, it's not Chris Isaak *
> 
> _For those of you simply looking for more info about the True Blood theme song, the title is "Bad Things" by Jace Everett. No, it's not Chris Isaak._
> 
> 
> I guess I am not the only ding dong!!!!



Well like I said, it definitely sounds like him!  But your right for them to add that it's not Chris Isaak, a lot of people thought it was.

So what are everyone's plans for the weekend?  Anything fun going on in your area?

For me you already know that I'm doing the Halloween decorations, that will take both days.  We're not doing much going out lately because we're saving our cashola for Disney.  DH just called and said he's picking up some wine (I definitely have to be careful how much of that I drink, but thankfully a little is allowed on Atkins!), but in the evenings I have been scrapbooking my last Disney trip.  Oh I just had a great thought, usually when I'm scrapbooking DH is on the computer searching for tunes to donwload onto the iPod, I will have him look for Bad Things!  SWEET!


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## maddhatir

Good luck with your decorations- sorry I did not get to post any pics today-  If you are hanging any skeletons from a tree- hang one by it's feet- I did that, it looks pretty cool. 

I just got my iPod and I have no idea what the heck to do with it I have SIRIUS in the car and like to listen to that while I drive, I also put on SIRIUS or Live 365 on my laptop when I am working- what the HECK did I want an iPod for?  Just b/c I want to hang with the cool kids I guess  

DH and I are going down the shore and spending the night. There is a big Flea Market in Ocean City tomorrow so I want to hit that and DH wants to get in one last sail before he takes the boat out of the water next weekend.

We are coming home on Saturday and going shopping for our dinner on Sunday- the family will be over. It is DHs b-day and he wants pasta with meat sauce for his first real meal after detoxing and I am getting a yummy carrot cake! 

Have a great weekend everyone!


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## TKDisneylover

maddhatir said:


> Good luck with your decorations- sorry I did not get to post any pics today-  If you are hanging any skeletons from a tree- hang one by it's feet- I did that, it looks pretty cool.



Thanks!  And I will definitely hang a skeleton upside down, how cool is that!? 



> I just got my iPod and I have no idea what the heck to do with it I have SIRIUS in the car and like to listen to that while I drive, I also put on SIRIUS or Live 365 on my laptop when I am working- what the HECK did I want an iPod for?  Just b/c I want to hang with the cool kids I guess



I would love SIRIUS in my car, but DH doesn't want to spend the money so I listen to my CD's.  I've got a 6 CD changer so that gives me variety enough without having to pop CD's in & out.  And I'm always listening to Live365 on my computer (no laptop yet, someday though I hope).  Just an idea for you with the iPod, we purchased a speaker docking station for ours, it's not the iPod brand, we got it at Kohl's Dept. Store, it's called iFusion, and we take it on all of our trips so that we can listen to the iPod in our hotel/resort. 



> DH and I are going down the shore and spending the night. There is a big Flea Market in Ocean City tomorrow so I want to hit that and DH wants to get in one last sail before he takes the boat out of the water next weekend.
> 
> We are coming home on Saturday and going shopping for our dinner on Sunday- the family will be over. It is DHs b-day and he wants pasta with meat sauce for his first real meal after detoxing and I am getting a yummy carrot cake!



Sounds like a great time!  Have fun and happy shopping!  Tell DH to be careful eating normal food after that detox, that could wreak hovoc on a persons body.


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## Shyvioletisme

maddhatir said:


> OMG! I am so embarrased!   You are right about the song- I went on and on about Chris
> 
> Look- I found this on The Suburban Vampire site while doing a search for the song:
> 
> *Monday, September 29, 2008*
> 
> *True Blood theme song--no, it's not Chris Isaak *
> 
> _For those of you simply looking for more info about the True Blood theme song, the title is "Bad Things" by Jace Everett. No, it's not Chris Isaak._
> 
> 
> I guess I am not the only ding dong!!!!



well we can forgive you...I haven't started watching the show yet   But I guess I now need to start watching it on demand and get caught up! and check out the theme song..


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## KirklandTutu

Ok, thank god more True Blood people.

I had never read her books before the first show...as of today, I have read them all, and all the short stories that I've been able to get my hands on.

...and I so understand the conversation about the theme song.  DH and I have had it...over and over...and sadly, he was right.


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## maddhatir

KirklandTutu said:


> Ok, thank god more True Blood people.
> 
> I had never read her books before the first show...as of today, I have read them all, and all the short stories that I've been able to get my hands on.
> 
> ...and I so understand the conversation about the theme song.  DH and I have had it...over and over...and sadly, he was right.



It seems like some people who have read the books are more disappointed in the show, b/c it is not right on with the books  

I chose not to read them before the show started and I am glad I didn't only b/c, now, I have nothing to be disappointed in or do not have to compare the books- with the show!


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## KirklandTutu

maddhatir said:


> It seems like some people who have read the books are more disappointed in the show, b/c it is not right on with the books
> 
> I chose not to read them before the show started and I am glad I didn't only b/c, now, I have nothing to be disappointed in or do not have to compare the books- with the show!



Character development wise, the show is much much better.  I do enjoy the books, but I have a feeling that I'm going to become obsessive about the show.  

'course, it could be becuase of the massive amounts of eye candy going on.


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## TKDisneylover

*HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE!!*​
Hope everyone is doing well!  I had one crazy, busy week and so thankful it's Friday.  I saw my podorthist this Wednesday and he adjusted my orthotics and believe it or not I did 20 minutes on the treadmill this morning!!   My ankle is feeling good, no pain anyway so I'm going to keep it going because it's going to be good prep for the Disney trip.  I think the heavy duty ibuprofens are helping too.

Anyone have fun plans for the weekend?  We have great weather predicted for the weekend, sunny & 70's, I think this is our Indian Summer because next week we're dropping into the 50's so that will mean that winter is right around the corner.  I'm going to finish my Halloween decorating (I started some last Saturday and then it rained all day Sunday so it did not get done), and then Sunday we are getting together with my dad to celebrate his birthday.

Have a great weekend everyone!


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## Shyvioletisme

TKDisneylover said:


> *HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE!!*​
> Hope everyone is doing well!  I had one crazy, busy week and so thankful it's Friday.  I saw my podorthist this Wednesday and he adjusted my orthotics and believe it or not I did 20 minutes on the treadmill this morning!!   My ankle is feeling good, no pain anyway so I'm going to keep it going because it's going to be good prep for the Disney trip.  I think the heavy duty ibuprofens are helping too.
> 
> Anyone have fun plans for the weekend?  We have great weather predicted for the weekend, sunny & 70's, I think this is our Indian Summer because next week we're dropping into the 50's so that will mean that winter is right around the corner.  I'm going to finish my Halloween decorating (I started some last Saturday and then it rained all day Sunday so it did not get done), and then Sunday we are getting together with my dad to celebrate his birthday.
> 
> Have a great weekend everyone!



Tammy, glad the orthotics are working and you are able to do more!! That's great...
We don't really have plans for the weekend..Going to a movie, getting DH to finish off the season of Weeds from ondemand. 
Hope ya'll have a wonderful weekend!!


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## TKDisneylover

Shyvioletisme said:


> Tammy, glad the orthotics are working and you are able to do more!! That's great...
> We don't really have plans for the weekend..Going to a movie, getting DH to finish off the season of Weeds from ondemand.
> Hope ya'll have a wonderful weekend!!



Thanks Tiffany! 

What movie are you planning to see?  I love Weeds!  We had originally started watching Season 1 from a bootleg DVD we got from a friend.  We also had Season 2 but we borrowed it to my DSIL and never got back to it (we did not have Showtime at the time).  So needless to say we have a lot of catching up to do, but thank goodness for On Demand!


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## Shyvioletisme

TKDisneylover said:


> Thanks Tiffany!
> 
> What movie are you planning to see?  I love Weeds!  We had originally started watching Season 1 from a bootleg DVD we got from a friend.  We also had Season 2 but we borrowed it to my DSIL and never got back to it (we did not have Showtime at the time).  So needless to say we have a lot of catching up to do, but thank goodness for On Demand!



Probably Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist...it's based off a young adult book we both like..(what can I say..I love young adult novels...lol) The movie looks good, not what I'd really want from a movie of the book(I love Michael Cera, but he's SO not right for the role of Nick), but it still looks cute...

Oh you guys definitely need to get caught up on Weeds...I feel like it's only gotten better and better with each season!!! Yup, we are lovers of On Demand as well...I never remember my shows on HBO and Showtime, so it is a lifesaver for us!!


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## MistyMoss

We have a pretty quiet weekend going. Saturday night though our Mizzou Tigers play Oklahoma State. We already have plans to go to a sports bar with some friends to watch. GO TIGERS!!!

I have never read the True Blood books. I have been watching the show though. I am waiting to see who is killing everyone. The dog thing is weird too, especially now that we know Sam barks in his sleep.


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## Shyvioletisme

MistyMoss said:


> We have a pretty quiet weekend going. Saturday night though our Mizzou Tigers play Oklahoma State. We already have plans to go to a sports bar with some friends to watch. GO TIGERS!!!
> 
> I have never read the True Blood books. I have been watching the show though. I am waiting to see who is killing everyone. The dog thing is weird too, especially now that we know Sam barks in his sleep.



I haven't read the books either..I have a friend who has the same taste in Sci-Fi Fantasy and has read the series, but doesn't like them as much as a lot of other series by other authors...but I'm thinking I may try to find them at the used bookstores around town...

I'm really wondering what's up with Sam as well...and who's killing people...He seems suspicious, but I can't believe it is him at all. 
BTW, has anyone else actually heard Stephen Moyers (Bill) talk IRL? Since he's British, he has a really beautiful natural accent...then again I'm really partial to British accents.


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## KirklandTutu

Shyvioletisme said:


> I haven't read the books either..I have a friend who has the same taste in Sci-Fi Fantasy and has read the series, but doesn't like them as much as a lot of other series by other authors...but I'm thinking I may try to find them at the used bookstores around town...
> .



I agree.  They're good books, but I think there are better series out there.  I actually like the tv version better.


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