Pregnacy/Labor pain!!!

[MommyBryn]

They were trying the entire time, by pushing on my stomach and having me push. That was about 15 minutes. After the umbilical cord popped off thats when they tried to forceps but eventually had to remove it by hand...all in all about a half hour to 45 minutes, but like i said i was also hemragging so they had to worry about both.

Oh okay! I thought you meant you hemorrhaged AFTER they removed it. I just wondered since it can be natural for the placenta to take a while to deliver (mine with #2 took 45 min...I know some women who've taken 1-2 hours!) but a lot of dr's rush the process and cause more problems that way...but hemorrhaging from retained placenta is a whole 'nother ballgame. Sorry you had to go through that! But like you said, it's SO worth it!! Congrats again!!

 

[BeckyScott]

The lovely part about her delivery is that an hour after she was born, I was sorta walking a mile-long corridor, clutching the back of my hospital gown trying to get to my room (no wheelchairs)

Gosh, that reminds me...

Oldest DS, because he was a few weeks early and because my water had broken early, I labored in one room but delivered in an operating room, like they'd use for c-sections, just in case there were complications. I was in the middle of a contraction and they were saying "okay, we need you to hop off the bed and climb onto the gurney so we can take you to the delivery room" and I am like Satan Possessed, yeah sure lady, I'll just hop right up in the middle of this contraction, are you insane? After he was born, they parked me in the hallway for the stomach-pushing, then wheeled me in the gurney down the hall (past my adoring fans) to my room.

So youngest DS since it was scheduled, I got a labor/delivery suite. (You still switch to a different room afterwards) So I had him, and I'd had an episiotomy so the OB stitched that up, and then I swear it was 30 seconds later this nurse shows up with a wheelchair and wants me to hop up and sit on the chair so she can wheel me down to my room. DH was grabbing all our things, it was sort of like "okay, you're done, get your stuff and get out, we've got people waiting". I was like gee, lady, I just pushed out a kid okay?, can I have a few minutes? It's not like I need to go back to work in the fields now.

To the OP, when this happens for you, if you decide to use a hospital, make sure they have labor/delivery/recovery suites where you can stay in one room the whole time. I think it's much more common now, my kids are a little older and I live in the sticks. My best friend decided for her deliveries to go to a hospital the next town over, which I thought was nuts b/c she had to find an OB that could use that hospital and drive much further for appointments... until I saw the room she was in. It looked like a hotel suite. Much much nicer than what I'd had, all the babies roomed in, hide-a-bed for the DH, tv/vcr with movies to borrow at the nurses station, catered "celebration" meal... I was so jealous! I had put priority on getting the closest hospital possible, since I somehow thought the kid was just going to fly out without warning, and there was a hospital less than a mile from our house. Yeah, like I would be one of those people whose kid just fell out in the toilet, surprise! Shop around, shop around....

 

[jboysen]

i'll take labor and delivery over 40 weeks of pregnancy any day. I may change my mind in a couple of weeks here, since I need to be induced because 7 weeks ago I was diagnosed with a pulmonary embolis and have been on blood thiners since. Two shots a day in the stomach is begining to wear on me. My first pregnancy I had morning sickness for 14 weeks followed by lots of back pain and then heart burn for four months. I was in labor for about 13 hours, I did have an epi, because the OB had to break my water(in which nothing came out) and I would not dialate for the life of me. The epi was on the lowest amount and the nurse kept trying to turn it up on me, which I finally yelled at her to leave it alone, because I was perfectly comfortable and any more I'd probably lose all feeling, which was not my goal. The only pain that was really bad was right after the OB broke my water. Otherwise I would do labor and delivery any day.

 

[katieam1]

I know it is different for different people and there is not a definitive answer for this.... but I'd love to hear different opinions on it.

Just how bad is the pain of childbirth? What would you compare it to in terms of pain? Can you get through the pain with breathing/mental techniques? Is it true that after you have your baby you forget the pain? and if you are answering this please tell us if you had drugs or a natural birth please... also any other information you'd like to give on the actual pain of child birth would be very appreciated.

My husband and I are planning on starting a family next spring, but honestly, over the last week or so I am just wanting to get pregnant and have a baby so bad! I don't have any kids yet so I can't even imagine what the pain of labor must be like. I'm lucky in that I never really have had bad cramps with my periods or anything like that...

anyway.. thanks in advance! I hope this ends up being a very interesting thread!

Well, it was a lot of pain, I am not going to lie! I have two children and would like two more so I guess you could say you "forget" or the pain is worth what you get out of it in the end. I can not comment on going into labor naturally because I was induced both times. They broke my water, gave me pitocin and at the most 6 hours later I had my girls. For my first I only took a small amount of drugs that just kind of take the edge off of the pain. With my second I had to have the epidural!! With my first one, they broke my water at 9 I was at 10cms at noon and I pushed for three hours before having her at 3:54 when they finally gave me an Episiotomy. My second I was not progressing and they thought they were going to have to do C-section. But in the last minute I progressed. I had an epidural and it took a LOT of the edge off! My second daughter had the cord wrapped around her neck twice and it was also wrapped around her shoulder which was some of the reason things were taking longer than should have I guess. I did not have an Episiotomy the second time it took 1 push! I have to say that although the labor was harder and hurt way more with my second one the recovery was worse for the first one. I had my girls 18 months apart. Everyone's experience is different and all I can say (which is what people told me before I had my older daughter) if it was so bad that people could not handle it, people would not have so many kids. All I can say is if you really want a baby don't let the fear of the labor/delivery stop you. They are truly a blessing!! Good luck to you!

 

[MaryJPixie]

I know it is different for different people and there is not a definitive answer for this.... but I'd love to hear different opinions on it.

Just how bad is the pain of childbirth? What would you compare it to in terms of pain? Can you get through the pain with breathing/mental techniques? Is it true that after you have your baby you forget the pain? and if you are answering this please tell us if you had drugs or a natural birth please... also any other information you'd like to give on the actual pain of child birth would be very appreciated.

My husband and I are planning on starting a family next spring, but honestly, over the last week or so I am just wanting to get pregnant and have a baby so bad! I don't have any kids yet so I can't even imagine what the pain of labor must be like. I'm lucky in that I never really have had bad cramps with my periods or anything like that...

anyway.. thanks in advance! I hope this ends up being a very interesting thread!

The nine months of nausea for me (I pretty much threw up everyday) was the worst for me ......The labor part was OK....I did read a book called "Mind Over Labor" and had an epidural......so for me the pain wasn't that bad at all....good luck with whatever happens

 

[MommyBryn]

I finally had a chance to actually read through the rest of this thread (I love all things pregnancy & childbirth!! ). Glad to see a few other homebirthers on here!!

I never answered the question about forgetting the pain. For my first birth, the pain was still VERY vivid for months afterwards. Even once I reached a point where I couldn't remember EXACTLY how I felt, I knew that I was still pretty terrified of it, regardless. Now having had my 2nd in a totally different way, I haven't forgotten the pain, BUT there wasn't much to remember! I can think back on the most painful part of labor and think, "I can't wait to do that again!!" It was so much different than with #1, so much easier, so less painful...

I enjoyed my labor more than I did the pregnancy!! I know thats weird but I loved the whole labor process, I felt so invigorating!!

I totally agree with you! Even immediately after my girls were born, I was already looking forward to doing it again. I LOVE childbirth.

If you are interested in natural childbirth, I recommend the documentary from Ricki Lake called "The Business of Being Born". It discusses how labor has changed over time, and especially the increase in prevalence of pitocin, epidurals and the slippery slope that can lead to more interventions and ultimately C sections and labors that don't progress the way doctors want them to progress.
I agree with looking into Ina May Gaskins work. Satistically on her "Farm" they had about a 1% c-section need with having close to 200 births prior to anyone needing a C section. Women's bodies know what to do. That's not to say emergencies don't happen. It's just not very coincidental that the c-section rate used to be 5% in the '70s, to now where it is over 30%. There are contributing factors such as liability and opinions such as those already expressed on this thread. Women have such a fear of childbirth that they would actually rather go through major surgery rather than do what their bodies where meant to do naturally. Yes it can hurt. But because of the endorphins that your body releases during the birth process, you will likely never feel better than you will after giving birth. Pitocin and epidurals cover that sensation.
I have given birth both ways. My first I was induced b/c my water broke and they said I had to have pitocin rather than seeing if I would go into labor on my own. My second was natural. I would take the natural any day over the pitocin, epi combo.

I agree! Definitely check out TBOBB. Great show! I also agree with the bolded part. I had a VERY easy recovery from my first (medicated- epidural) birth. I was up walking around less than 45 minutes later, no noticable side effects, nursing was not negatively affected, etc. I felt great, and went home from the hospital less than 12 hours later. (although I did have a small tear, likely due to the effects of being in a hospital + the epidural = poor, unnatural positioning for delivery)

However, my recovery after my natural, unassisted birth at home was almost as if it never happened. The afterpains during nursing were much more noticable than with #1, but other than that I don't think I'd have ever known I just gave birth.

Childbirth is work. It's called "labor", not "picnic", for a reason. It's work of both the body and the mind. If you approach labor with the mindset that it's going to be the scariest/mostpainful thing ever then it will be. If you approach it with the idea that it is a natural process and your body knows how to do it, then you already have half the battle won.

For me labor was like intense, productive cramps. I've always gotten cramps and lower back pain, and it seems so silly cause I mean really - whats the point. There's nothing there to push out like in labor so really it's just meaningless, unproductive pain. With labor, the "cramps" come in waves and they are a good thing because it means that the life inside of you is making its way into the world with each one. Productive! Getting through the "pain" is very much a state of mind.

I also really agree with this!! I've always had gosh-awful cramps for like a week at a time with my period, but I wouldn't really compare labor to them. Labor contractions are almost exciting because you know- and you can feel!- that they have a real purpose, and each one you feel is bringing you that much closer to meeting your baby!!

 

[candielips]

I am jumping in on this thread w/o reading all 9 pages, sorry ladies.
No one can prepare you for childbirth as everyone is different.
When my water broke naturally I walked into that hospital w/ my birth plan & a smile on my face reading to meet our DD. That didn't happen for 36 hrs! I went 30 hrs before I got an epidural, and really only got it so I could sleep. Most of my labour was hard labour, contractions 1 min apart and 1 min long.
I had morphine twice through the labour and it only made everything kind of blur together.
Have a forgotten it 16 months later? No, in fact I'm still hesitant about doing it again. But my DD is the best thing to happen to me and she was worth every bit.
Don't let anyone's horror stories scare you. When you decide, you will get through it, like billions of women before you.

 

[joyfulscrapper]

I'm too tired to reply in detail right now, but can't wait to let you know how pleasantly surprising all 3 of my labor and delivery experiences were! I'll try to respond with the full story soon, but know this, it isn't always the way you fear it will be. I feared the worst, hearing all the horrors stories, being a person I consider a wimp, I expected it to be pretty bad. But I am living proof that some women are blessed to be able to deliver babies naturally and quite easily. If I had the money, patience, and a bigger house, I wouldn't mind having 20 babies, really!

 

[LisaMommy]

Childbirth was the worst pain I've ever experienced, but I'm a big wimp and don't usually experience that much pain. However childbirth will still be one of my favorite moments ever. It makes you feel so warm and fuzzy. Just holding your baby doesn't make you forget the pain, but it puts things into perspective.

 

[parkers*momma]

I'm one of the minority.

I have had 5 children and love every minute of being pregnant, labor, delivery, and being a mom-even with the lack of sleep(probably why I have 5 children)


For me, yes it hurt some, but it is a good hurt. I never really focused on the pain, just focused on getting to hold my new baby. As for the pain, I can honestly say...I remembered it hurt but can't actually remember how bad it was. It wasn't a kill me dead hurt...and mine were all born natural...but it was hurt. It's a pain that you will forget...at least in my case I did.

One thing to remember...don't fight the pain. Fighting the contraction will only make it worse. When one starts, breathe and focus on getting through that one single contraction. Don't think of the next one or the one after...just one at a time. This will help keep you relaxed which is a must with dealing with labor.

Also, have a visual point that reminds you the outcome. When using the breathing technique where you focus on an item while you breathe. I used the outfit my baby was going to wear home. It helped remind me that each contraction was getting me closer to seeing our baby in that outfit.

If I could, I would do it in all over again in a heartbeat. But after 9 pregnancies and 5 children...my body says nope.

I wish you the best...and remember...those 9 months and the labor/delivery is going to bring you a lifetime of joy. Really a small investment to all the happy memories you are going to create with your child.

 

[joyfulscrapper]

Ok, I'm back to give more details...

As I said, I am one of the women blessed to have easier pregnancies, labors, and deliveries. And it is not something I expected to happen to me at all, just like parkersmomma said, I consider myself a wimp. I should say that I hadn't experienced much pain prior to childbirth either. I had my gall bladder out, though, and had put up with attacks for a year before being diagnosed. I just thought I had a bad back... Anyway, after the gall bladder surgery, I thought the gas pain in my shoulder was horrible! I remember that pretty clearly over 10 years later! My mom is a tough woman, though. I have never been like her. She told me labor felt like bad gas pains to her. I laughed at her and said she was crazy...

#1 Smooth pregnancy, minor morning sickness, went into labor on the eve of my due date - this is apparently unheard of for a first timer and they didn't even believe I was in labor when I called! I, like others who have posted, had a big fear of the epidural needle. I really wanted to avoid that if possible, but also wanted to avoid the pain of childbirth. So I had it in my head that I would bear the epidural because I probably wouldn't be able to bear the labor pains. When I got to the hospital I was about 4 or 5 cm dilated. They asked if I wanted an epidural and I said yes, even though at that point the pain was very manageable. (Oh, by the way, I thought I was only constipated because the labor pains felt just like gas pains to me!!! Just like my mom, go figure!) Things progressed quickly and the epi hadn't come yet, and I was 9 cm. So they said it was too late and I didn't mind at all because the only thing that changed for me really, was the closeness of the contractions. I just breathed in my nose and out my mouth slowly through each one and did just fine. The pushing part was even better for me because I couldn't feel the labor pain at all if I pushed through it. There was bad burning as the shoulders came out, but that was it. Most people are so amazed to see their babies when they are born, I was so amazed I did it without drugs! Yes, I was thrilled to see my baby, but really surprised at how well it went - so different that I had imagined!

#2 She came late and I still didn't think I was in labor when it started. I knew I was having contractions, but thought it might be false labor. I don't know why, I just did... Anyway, took a bath to relax myself, they didn't stop so I called the doctor and my mom. She later said she was worried that I wouldn't make it to the hospital in time because she could tell I was really far along when she got to our house. When I got to the hospital I was 7 cm and the contractions were a minute apart! I was only there for 45 minutes before she was born! The pain was any worse or better this time, just more intense because it came so much faster. A little harder to deal with that way, but still not too bad. Again, no epidural.

#3 Induced and really scared it would be unbearable because of that. My doctor had asked if I wanted the epi and I said "well, I'm going to try to go without it again" and she laughed and said "but you were induced this time, it will be very different". That didn't help! But, nothing seemed very different this time either. The biggest difference was that the baby wasn't engaged as much this time and I wasn't feeling the urge to push when I was fully dilated. I ended up having to push a little to get her in the right position so I would feel that overwhelming urge. So it was a little longer labor than I thought, since the second one came so quick, but not more painful at all. Still no epidural.

I still can't believe it when I look back. I just say my body was meant to birth babies, it knows what to do. I don't take credit because it just worked out well for me. I didn't do anything special. So, it can happen! I'm guessing it was like this for me because it was like that for my mom and maybe that kind of thing is hereditary. But, my mom has polycystic ovarian disorder and I've never had any problems with that. So you never know, but keep an open mind about it. Be prepared for worse, but know better can and does happen.

 

[TxRabbit]

If you can, I would recommend hearing birth stories from the women in your family. I found that I really experienced labor similarly to them.

At 36 weeks, I was 3-4 cm dilated and 90% effaced, really similar to the women in my family.

I was praying to hold onto 37 weeks so I wouldn't have a premie birth! I really wanted to delivery at the newer birth care center, a joint venture of two hospitals, a separate facility with an underground access tunnel to the hospital in the event that you needed more emergency care. And you had to be full term to deliver there.

Labor started with me feeling very very uncomfortable. I was lying on the couch, eating some lunch and watching a movie. But I couldn't get comfortable. My back was aching something fierce. I couldn't position my body to feel okay.

I couldn't remember if this was a false labor sign or real labor sign. I didn't take any birthing classes, because frankly, I wasn't interested in hearing all the information that I was sure they wanted to tell me. I found the information I needed on my own.

So, I grabbed a pregnancy/labor book, and got into a nice hot tub. Reading in the tub, I found out sure enough, real labor signs.

I tend to be too detailed, so I will try to fast forward. I experienced labor pain as a magnified (extremely magnified) menstral pain. I always got back aches, never cramps. So I had back labor. It felt like one big constant pain, no breaks, no rests, no counting the minutes between the pains. Pain was all there was. The ride to the hospital was excruciating.

I remember walking around the waiting room saying "This is very unexpected" over and over.

I was in transition when I arrived. I remember reading that the emotional sign post for transition is the feeling that says I don't know if I can do this. So I determined that I wouldn't let go of my desires for a non-medicated birth.

Each labor/delivery/recovery room had a private bath with a whirlpool tub. It was my destination upon arrival. My hubby couldn't rub my back hard enough, but once I had those jets pounding at my back, I was fine. Fine being relative. But I could finally recognize the contractions, the rests, the breaks.

I knew I was fully dilated because my body literally starting bearing down without my help. I got out of the tub and the nurses confirmed.

Then it was a heavenly rest. I felt no real pain and no real urge to do anything. I had read about this. It's like your body gives you a respite.

Then comes the realization that you have to finish the deed. LOL.

I was very grateful to be able to move around and find a good position for pushing. The bed itself was mechanical and able to tilt, with stirups and bars, and all kinds of things to help you brace yourself to get into a good position.

I didn't want the blood vessels in my eyes to burst (which I had read could happen if you hold your breath when you push.) The doctor tried to get me to hold my breath repeatedly. I just did what I wanted to do.

After 25 minutes of pushing and having not much happen, I decided I would try holding my breath. Immediately, I felt the difference. Holding your breath is a HUGE help. The doctor saw that I had a lot of control with the pushing so he lubed me up good to ease my son into the world. No episiotomy for me. My beautiful son was born.

The pushing part had very little pain for me. I've been constipated and hurt worse pushing then. Sorry if TMI.

What was bad was the doctor didn't give me much time for delivering the placenta, which didn't want to detach I guess. He literally reached in and pulled it all out. Repeatedly. And that was painful.

The pain of labor is pretty much isolated to labor, especially with a ******l delivery. The only thing to watch out for is the weirdness of the swollen private parts in the days that follow. That is rather uncomfortable, but not painful.

It's been almost 8 years since my son was born. I've had two miscarriage since then. I can honestly say that the pain of a natural, non-medicated, non-surgical miscarriage at 11 weeks was much much worse than delivery.

Be blessed looking forward to starting your family. We are still hoping to expand ours!

 

[tzolkin]

However, my recovery after my natural, unassisted birth at home was almost as if it never happened. The afterpains during nursing were much more noticable than with #1, but other than that I don't think I'd have ever known I just gave birth.

Yeah, no one tells you about that. My second was about the same as the first but lasted a few days, but right after my third the pains were just as bad as the contractions during labor. I have a bleeding disorder and the nurse was talking to me about my pain/hemorraging and I told her the pains were much worse than I had with the first two. She said for most people they get worse each time. I did leave the hospital less than 18hrs after having him and felt absolutely fine, no soreness or anything.

 

[brandylouwho]

You know, I had forgotten about the afterpains while nursing...not very bad with the first child, but they were rather painful with the second (like super bad gas maybe). But at least my 2nd nursed well from birth.

I was also thinking of birthing stories and how some women really have an easy time of it. My mom for example (all drug free births), I was her first and I think she was maybe in labor and hour or two, her second kid was maybe 4 hours and the third...well, he sort of plopped out--at home (not a planned home birth). She said she thought she had gas, got up to pee and realized she was crowning!!! He is lucky that he wasn't born in the toliet. I am sure my dad was scared out of his mind, but it all went fine.

That having a baby at home or in the car or something actually worried me more than the pain of child birth. But then lots of things worry pregnant ladies and mommies too. I think the worry gene wakes up once you become pregnant.

 

[mushumadness]

well I musta forget the pain now Morgans 5 weeks old lol, as we have decided to try for another!! not sure if its possible so soon, but hey the tryings good

 

[MommyBryn]

well I musta forget the pain now Morgans 5 weeks old lol, as we have decided to try for another!! not sure if its possible so soon, but hey the tryings good

How exciting! We started trying for #2 right after my first was born, too (because it obviously takes us a long time to get and stay pg so I didn't want to waste any! LOL). I'm not in such of a hurry this time because BF is super important to me, but after another 4-5 months min, I'm ready! I can't wait to go through labor again!!!

Good luck!!

 

[Tasmen]

I had to be induced (2 weeks late and almost zero amniotic fluid..doh!). I have to say that was some horrendous pain. I couldn't get the epidural until they were certain I was in full blown labor. I had about 12 hours worth of labor pains -- starting 1 contraction every 10 minutes and ending up with a contraction every 1-2 by the time I finally had the cervidil removed and the epi put in. Once I had the epidural, though, it was smooth sailing. I even got to take a nap.

My whole labor and delivery process took about 30 hours from induction to birth. Once I got to pushing it took about 4 pushes to plonk out my daughter. And I have to say it was totally worth it.

 

["Cinder" Ella's Mom]

I didn't read the whole thread, so forgive me if this is a repeat. Hospitals do not reward medals for those women who choose to give birth without drugs! Contractions can get very intense, but with an epidural you will be able to enjoy the moment free from pain. I was calm and able to watch my kids being born through a mirror at the foot of the hospital bed. Really it was an amazing experience. It is your choice, of course, but I found the epidural to be a wonderful thing!

 

[ScotsMinnie]

I had 2 very different birth experiences but both had the same outcome - a beautiful baby! You have to make the choices depending on how you feel at the time. Don't make decisions about pain relief before you experience the pain. Otherwise you put pressure on yourself to live up to your expectations of how you think you should cope.

DD1 I had 30 hours of labour during which time I had gas and air and an epidural which had to be topped up as it did not take properly. I then had to have an emergency C section so got the eipdural topped up again - didn't work so then a spinal which didn't work properly either. Sadly they cut before they realised it wasn't working and - yes - it hurt! A lot! So they knocked me out with a GA. Woke up to find a beautiful baby girl.

DD2 I got pains and 2 hours later I had to leave for the hospital as i was in agony. i was left in the waiting room tillI could bear it no longer and they took me to the ward. I begged for gas and air as it was terrible and they eventually examined me and realised I was 10cm and ready to push. I asked for an epidural and they laughed as it was way too late. I cried! Anyway 2 hours of pushing later they realised she was stuck so it was back tot he OR for another emergency section. This time they took their time with the spinal and it worked perfectly. Saw her being born and it was much happier.

So one with lots of pain relief and a section and one with no pain relief then a section. But 2 lovely little girls who I love with all my heart.


You will cope fine and you will end up with the most precious reward in the world. And you forget about the pain pretty quickly. Untill number 2 when it comes rushing back to you!!!!!!!!!

 

[drcbpearce]

I've done it both ways. we tried to have DS at home, no drugs. He refused to cooperate and we ended up in the hospital w/the whole shootin' match. Second time around, scheduled c-section. Yes, they both are painful. But to me, what would've been more painful is never doing it at all. Everyone on here has said you don't forget the pain. It's very true, whoever said you do, must have never done it. You just don't really mind, once you see the reward. Please don't let fear make your decision for you. Many posters have suggested, as do I, read read read, everything you can get your hands on. Knowledge is power. If you know what to expect and when to expect it, pun not intended, it's not so scary. Be aware, some of the books can really overload on the details to the negative, meaning all of the potential problems. If you get one of these books, please take it with a grain of salt and know that the chances of some these things happeningare very small. That said, I know if you happen to be a person who is affected by one of these things, the percentage is huge.

You know, I"m sure someone has already said this, but if you just go with the flow and let things happen, everything will happen the way it's supposed to. That's kind of the way things become once you have kids, you realize you no longer really control the show. HTH