I'm really sorry to hear about your mother
I know what you're saying and I agree that you are not destined to get along. I just know that I spent my whole life being lonely and even now with my own kids I feel like I just don't get the dynamics between them having never had any siblings myself. it's still lonely as an adult and it's a little hard that my kids have no aunts, uncles, cousins etc. from my side. I don't know... I'm just always curious about people's opinions on this I guess. And I'm always interested in the paren't perspective, my parent's never wanted
any kids so there ya' go! Although I must admit, having 4 kids now, there are many a day when I miss only having one
Then again, most of those days, I miss when I didn't have any!!