Filling a week.......

[Minnie_me]

My ex is taking our daughters on vacation over Spring break. He's not the typical divorced dad who has his kids every other weekend. In fact, in the 4.5 years since he left us, he's had them for an entire weekend only 3 or 4 times. So I haven't been away from my girls very much at all!! I'm afraid that this week is going to be really hard on me.

Most of my friends will be gone as well. And money is tight, so spa days, shopping sprees, etc. are out.

I do have a 100-year old house and a dog, LOL! So I know that I can keep busy with house projects, and dog walks (if the weather cooperates --- I'm in the NE and there's still snow on the ground here!).

I plan on catching up on my reading, but I fear that I could waste away the days just lounging on the couch and reading. And that could become a depressing habit.

What suggestions do you have for filling 7 days and nights?!?!?

 

[OceanAnnie]

My ex is taking our daughters on vacation over Spring break. He's not the typical divorced dad who has his kids every other weekend. In fact, in the 4.5 years since he left us, he's had them for an entire weekend only 3 or 4 times. So I haven't been away from my girls very much at all!! I'm afraid that this week is going to be really hard on me.

Most of my friends will be gone as well. And money is tight, so spa days, shopping sprees, etc. are out.

I do have a 100-year old house and a dog, LOL! So I know that I can keep busy with house projects, and dog walks (if the weather cooperates --- I'm in the NE and there's still snow on the ground here!).

I plan on catching up on my reading, but I fear that I could waste away the days just lounging on the couch and reading. And that could become a depressing habit.

What suggestions do you have for filling 7 days and nights?!?!?

I'd probably give myself a spa day (or two) at home. There are some really good products you can get much cheaper than a salon at CVS or even the grocery store. Mani, pedi, face masks, and such. Put on some soft music, pamper yourself, relax.

I'd think of a little something I could do to welcome the kids back. Put together a favorite meal, try a new recipe you think the kids will like, some treats.

Maybe do a little project or find a little something for their rooms. I'd try to get them a small token to let them know they were missed.

I'd do some of the things I can't do as easily or quickly with the kids at home. I like to re-arrange the furniture. Shop for new curtains or throw pillows. Just some little spruce ups. The kids are full of ideas. Lots of time I'm all for it. But sometimes, I'd just like to try what I have in mind without being bombarded.

I'd declutter some. Donate some things. Read a lot. Get some movies I wouldn't be able to watch with the kiddos. I like sobby romance movies without the teasing. "Mom's crrryyyinnnngggg again!".

Maybe plant a low maintenance garden. Somethings that don't require a lot of TLC.

HTH!

ETA: I know it's going to be a mixed bag for you. You are going to miss the kids a lot! Be good to yourself. Try to stay somewhat busy.

 

[aprilgail2]

My daughter recently went away with a friend and her family for 6 days- I went out to dinner with a different friend each night after work, on the weekend I slept in and then went shopping with friends and out to dinner with them after shopping . It was good to catch up with friends!! If it was summer I would have spent a lot of time in the yard relaxing and reading by the pool.

 

[ronandannette]

OP, are you a SAHM or will you be working during the daytime? Personally, as an introvert with a very demanding job (I'm gone 10 hrs/day), a week-long solo staycation sounds like a dream! I'd do a combination of the things PP's have mentioned and the time would fly by!

Tackle some spring cleaning; there's always stuff that has been put off. Schedule a lunch/dinner or two with a friend or family member; if you've got somebody within a few hours drive make a plan to go for a visit. Binge-watch something on Netflix that you've avoided because it wasn't kid-friendly. Take naps. And don't discount the simple joy of laying around catching up on your reading - who among us wouldn't love a chance to do that! Honestly, I see this as way more of an opportunity than a problem. Unless you're way too dependent on your kids emotionally, I don't know how depression could settle in over such a brief period. It's not a loss...they're coming back, right? Is there something else going on here that's got you so anxious?

 

[Minnie_me]

OP, are you a SAHM or will you be working during the daytime?

I am a teacher, so I will be on Spring Break as well.

Honestly, I see this as way more of an opportunity than a problem. Unless you're way too dependent on your kids emotionally, I don't know how depression could settle in over such a brief period. It's not a loss...they're coming back, right? Is there something else going on here that's got you so anxious?

It's just such a long time to be alone. Like I said in my OP, most of my friends are going away as well (I can think of only 1 who will be in town, and she is a small business owner and will not have time to hang with me). And I have no family within 6 hours of where I live. It will be just me and the dog for 7 days and nights.

 

[ronandannette]

I am a teacher, so I will be on Spring Break as well.



It's just such a long time to be alone. Like I said in my OP, most of my friends are going away as well (I can think of only 1 who will be in town, and she is a small business owner and will not have time to hang with me). And I have no family within 6 hours of where I live. It will be just me and the dog for 7 days and nights.

All the more reason for you to kick back and breath. A six hour drive is doable; is there anybody there you'd like to spend a few days with? A week in my world flies by when I'm busy and even faster when I'm not. I guess it's a matter of perception.

 

[Kellydelly]

The time will fly by, even if you just engross yourself in a few good novels. Enjoy the time to yourself . I think you will actually like not having anyone else to worry about for a short while.

When I was a kid my father didn't see us weekly or even every other weekend either. It was considered a treat to get to go to his apartment when it happened. I hope your girls have a nice time with their dad, in spite of his usual inattentiveness.

 

[MSSANDRA]

OP, are you a SAHM or will you be working during the daytime? Personally, as an introvert with a very demanding job (I'm gone 10 hrs/day), a week-long solo staycation sounds like a dream! I'd do a combination of the things PP's have mentioned and the time would fly by!

Tackle some spring cleaning; there's always stuff that has been put off. Schedule a lunch/dinner or two with a friend or family member; if you've got somebody within a few hours drive make a plan to go for a visit. Binge-watch something on Netflix that you've avoided because it wasn't kid-friendly. Take naps. And don't discount the simple joy of laying around catching up on your reading - who among us wouldn't love a chance to do that! Honestly, I see this as way more of an opportunity than a problem. Unless you're way too dependent on your kids emotionally, I don't know how depression could settle in over such a brief period. It's not a loss...they're coming back, right? Is there something else going on here that's got you so anxious?

Not quite fair. Unless you have been there...done that.....you don't really get how hard it will be to let your children go with someone that has spent so little time with them...even if it is there own father. Been there....done that with our youngest and his bio-mom.
OP....try to do everything you can to put your mind at ease that you kids are happy and safe with dad. Doing this will make your week so much easier and maybe enjoyable. Even if you guys do not communicate well, be sure he knows everything he needs to know to make it easier on the kids. I so get the "let him figure it out for himself " thought, but in reality that is not best for the kids. Little things like watching certain foods and bathroom habits or fears or being sensitive to anything can make or break a trip. Perhaps send a cell phone with your kids. A cheap pay as you go one may well be worth the money and any child over 5 could be able to care for it fairly well. Once your mind is at least a bit less troubled, think of things to do. You do not want to set home alone a full week. Believe me. You can mall dream shop without spending much or anything. Hit co-sign shops and refresh the kids summer outfits, look for museums or art center that have free or low cost admission and check those out. Go for a long drive in the country. Indulge in a few secret passions. I love a couple magazines, and really good chocolate. Take walks outside, consider getting a new pet. Great time without the kids there and certainly would keep you busy. We got a dog once when DS was gone and it was a great choice for a lot of reasons. It's ok to be sad and worried but try to keep both in check. I really prefer to not spend a lot of time with friends when I am dealing with this but close family that understands is important to me. If friends or family help, carve out time for this two. Starbucks is great if dinner is too much. Try hard to embrace the time and the week will go quickly!

 

[Dizneefamily+4]

My dh is a teacher. I became a SAHM when my youngest (dd8) was born. Then when she went to kindergarten, I went back to work part time and now I'm back full time. Every year, right when school gets out, my dh takes our 2 kids (and the dog) up north to our cabin for a week. Honestly, it's heaven to me! I really don't make any plans with friends. I like the me-time. Sometimes, I'll go shopping for myself (if budget allows) during one evening. But for the most part, I just hang at home watching movies and getting all the projects around the house done that I don't usually have time for between work and being mom.

I know everyone is different - especially based on personality, but I'd love that week to myself!

 

[ronandannette]

Not quite fair. Unless you have been there...done that.....you don't really get how hard it will be to let your children go with someone that has spent so little time with them...even if it is there own father. Been there....done that with our youngest and his bio-mom.
OP....try to do everything you can to put your mind at ease that you kids are happy and safe with dad. Doing this will make your week so much easier and maybe enjoyable. Even if you guys do not communicate well, be sure he knows everything he needs to know to make it easier on the kids. I so get the "let him figure it out for himself " thought, but in reality that is not best for the kids. Little things like watching certain foods and bathroom habits or fears or being sensitive to anything can make or break a trip. Perhaps send a cell phone with your kids. A cheap pay as you go one may well be worth the money and any child over 5 could be able to care for it fairly well. Once your mind is at least a bit less troubled, think of things to do. You do not want to set home alone a full week. Believe me. You can mall dream shop without spending much or anything. Hit co-sign shops and refresh the kids summer outfits, look for museums or art center that have free or low cost admission and check those out. Go for a long drive in the country. Indulge in a few secret passions. I love a couple magazines, and really good chocolate. Take walks outside, consider getting a new pet. Great time without the kids there and certainly would keep you busy. We got a dog once when DS was gone and it was a great choice for a lot of reasons. It's ok to be sad and worried but try to keep both in check. I really prefer to not spend a lot of time with friends when I am dealing with this but close family that understands is important to me. If friends or family help, carve out time for this two. Starbucks is great if dinner is too much. Try hard to embrace the time and the week will go quickly!

Not intending to be harsh...you're "reading between the lines" of the OP in a way I didn't. The issue she presented was about how to fill her free time, not anxiety about her children going with their Dad. I'm not saying you're wrong, just that it wasn't what was put out there. I also asked her if there was more to it emotionally and she didn't address what you describe then either - only her apprehension about how to pass the time. Sorry OP - maybe you could clarify for all of us?

 

[lisaviolet]

Flip it around.

Alone is a wonderful thing.

And I know it's hard for some people to relax and not be busy, busy, busy. So see this as a challenge for you. I mean really - you're a teacher and a single mother. Alone time and relaxation are not exactly every single day occurrences.

It's foreign to you, that's all. Now it won't be.

Sometimes the fear of alone is about the fear of one's thoughts/brain etc. Embrace it. This could be one of the best weeks of your life. You don't know.

And even if it is hard. So what? You'll learn something about you. That's a good thing in the end.

Also, reading and lying on the couch are not sinful activities. Well they aren't for me. Treasure the opportunity to do nothing.

Enjoy OP. I know you talked about money. But it takes very little money to explore a city. Are you near one? I go to NYC regularly - spend next to nothing and have a wonderful time. Cheese and bread and fruit into Central Park and I'm in heaven.

There's is nothing better than exploring a city on foot. Or if that's not your thing - explore all the places nearby that you never take a moment to do. It could be as simple as a park.

Have fun.

 

[MSSANDRA]

Not intending to be harsh...you're "reading between the lines" of the OP in a way I didn't. The issue she presented was about how to fill her free time, not anxiety about her children going with their Dad. I'm not saying you're wrong, just that it wasn't what was put out there. I also asked her if there was more to it emotionally and she didn't address what you describe then either - only her apprehension about how to pass the time. Sorry OP - maybe you could clarify for all of us?

You are right.....I was looking at it the way we look at it here in our situation. She may very well be happy to have a break and just have no idea what to do with herself. I hope this is indeed the case! I love some "ME" time, just not when i'm worried about our little guy.

 

[Fjobe]

How about a good book or book series? Make a list of jobs that need to be done around the house and tackle one each day (wiping down baseboards, wiping down cabinets, cleaning the oven, organizing closets, cleaning the windows). Drink coffee and wear sweat pants and fuzzy socks. Look up ideas for your next vacation, play on the Dis, and make a wish list for your classroom. You could also organize photos...even create photo books online that you may be able to purchase in the future.

I am sorry you are going to be without your kids for a week...especially at a time when most of your friends are out of town. I hope you are able to enjoy your spring break!

 

[ronandannette]

You are right.....I was looking at it the way we look at it here in our situation. She may very well be happy to have a break and just have no idea what to do with herself. I hope this is indeed the case! I love some "ME" time, just not when i'm worried about our little guy.

Here's to happy, stress-free "ME" time for everybody!!

 

[mombrontrent]

The older I get the more introverted I have become. I love being home (and alone even better). No kids and DH around means the house STAYS clean, what a novel concept!

If I had a week to myself I would watch TV shows (HGTV and the food network), read a good book, take a break from cooking "family meals" and eat easy stuff. I might do a little shopping and reorganizing.....sounds like heaven

 

[bookgirl]

My ex is taking our daughters on vacation over Spring break. He's not the typical divorced dad who has his kids every other weekend. In fact, in the 4.5 years since he left us, he's had them for an entire weekend only 3 or 4 times. So I haven't been away from my girls very much at all!! I'm afraid that this week is going to be really hard on me.

Most of my friends will be gone as well. And money is tight, so spa days, shopping sprees, etc. are out.

I do have a 100-year old house and a dog, LOL! So I know that I can keep busy with house projects, and dog walks (if the weather cooperates --- I'm in the NE and there's still snow on the ground here!).

I plan on catching up on my reading, but I fear that I could waste away the days just lounging on the couch and reading. And that could become a depressing habit.
What suggestions do you have for filling 7 days and nights?!?!?

It's only a week. Not like slouching around and veggie out for that long will become a lifelong addiction.

I say read and lounge, eat popcorn for dinner if you want. Stay in your pj's all day. 7 days without having to be on call for your daughters might be a nice break.

Not saying you won't miss them and love to be with them, but a break is a nice to time to recharge your mommy cells.

 

[goofyintoronto]

My daughter recently went away with a friend and her family for 6 days- I went out to dinner with a different friend each night after work, on the weekend I slept in and then went shopping with friends and out to dinner with them after shopping . It was good to catch up with friends!! If it was summer I would have spent a lot of time in the yard relaxing and reading by the pool.

That sounds exhausting. You really love to go out....either that, or you just hate to be alone. Or both. Either way, its nice that you found things to keep busy. However, the OP was asking for suggestions on how to keep busy while on a TIGHT budget. Dinner/shopping with friends every day is expensive! Different strokes I guess. I'd use the week to chill out and relax. Give yourself a spa at home. Try out new recipes, bake, organize the house. Go for long walks. The possibilities are endless! The best part is that all these are very budget friendly.

 

[mumto3girls]

The older I get the more introverted I have become. I love being home (and alone even better). No kids and DH around means the house STAYS clean, what a novel concept!

If I had a week to myself I would watch TV shows (HGTV and the food network), read a good book, take a break from cooking "family meals" and eat easy stuff. I might do a little shopping and reorganizing.....sounds like heaven

All of this. I love my family, but I also enjoy being home without anyone wanting anything from me. Reading and watching tv alone are my idea of an enjoyable evening/afternoon. And uninterrupted time to get stuff done? Win-win!

 

[DisneyJamieCA]

I would do things in my house I am never able to complete with everybody here. I would spend the first day or so really cleaning the house. Do the laundry, change the sheets, declutter, etc. That way I could spend an entire week in a CLEAN house! I'm getting old because the idea of that makes me giddy, lol. And then I would do what I enjoy doing without feeling guilty - I'd sleep in, I would catch up on the DVR, read the books I've been trying to get to. I'd take long hot baths. Maybe see a movie (or Redbox/Netflix) some I missed in the theaters. And you say you do have a friend in the area - I'd find a time she can spare a few minutes and bring her coffee and catch up. I know a week seems like a really long time, but I think you'll find it zooms by.

 

[Disney Doll]

I'd clean and organize every room in thehouse if I had a week of free time where no one was going to need anything from me.

I'd donate things that were donate-able. I'd discard things that should be discarded. And I'd organize everything else.