I agree with what you are saying somewhat. We went two August's in a row, and this last trip the planning really worked our families nerves. I would like to say I will always love WDW and continue to return.
HOWEVER, we had to have a several hour planning meeting, to get down to the restaurant and FP in order to coordinate a reasonable schedule. This is part of the fun for us, however I stayed up to midnight to book plane tickets, and barely got a direct flight from Philadelphia to Orlando. There were also a couple mornings where we adjusted work schedules to schedule ADR's and FP's. Through this we essentially did everything we wanted and had an amazing trip.
While it is extremely time consuming and involved, we had a nice lunch where we each made a different food from somewhere around Disney and planned with the Epcot entrance music playing in the background. This was with my mother, sister, and I. Therefore, we consider the planning part of the fun.
Again, I do understand frustrations (we all three start work early in the morning so the midnight and 7am thing was a bit of an issue). But I would say it absolutely pays off.
One tip, if all ADR's are showing as booked, is to try calling the restaurants. Not sure why, but several times when my mother booked ADR's for us, NONE were showing up as available on property. A simple phone call showed restaurants did have openings. This included several major ones such as Boma and Ohana.
