Are parents having their kids social distance in your area?

[Boardwalk Jedi]

My kids are being pretty good, likely because 1) they're fairly smart 2) their nurse mom is pounding it into them how serious this is.

But everyday on social media, they see other teens hanging at each others' houses or driving together. I get that teenagers will be sneaky and feel invincible, but they are flaunting their actions and their parents are fine with it. Yesterday, being a gorgeous day here, took the cake in terms of ignoring guidelines. Some parents are upset about those not complying and post their frustration on facebook, then defensive parents snap back trying to justify their decisions.

For me, it's just depressing. I'm all for getting out of the house and using parks, beaches, and high school athletic fields/tracks safely, but I'm worried they will have to be closed if people keep being so careless.

 

[siren0119]

It's frustrating here. I know everyone's situation is different and I really try not to judge, but more and more I've been seeing groups of teens and preteens walking around downtown, and I'm also seeing more adults walking together outside without protection and without social distancing. My kids have been troupers about it all and we've tried to keep them connected to their friends on video chat. But they are frustrated because they want to hang out with their friends. And parents and kids who decide the physical distancing guidelines don't apply to them are making it confusing. I just keep stressing that we are making choices that are best for the biggest number of people, even if there's a low chance we ourselves would be affected. They get it, but I know they're frustrated.

 

[mjkacmom]

Yes. All of the playgrounds, athletic fields and basketball courts have been closed since 3/16. My 19 year old has gone on bike rides and runs with one other and they keep apart, and has attended small outdoor gathering (8 tops) with her closest friends, chairs 6 feet apart. Dd17 has parking lot meetups sitting on cars (no driving together), ds17, after a few cheats he got in trouble for in the first couple of days (soccer field, basketball court, so hard because he and his friends go there all of the time to play) now takes solo bike rides and sees his friends on Xbox only. We have daily family walks.

 

[LSUmiss]

Ppl were here a first but now ppl are over it. More & more ppl are letting their kids play together.

 

[wishuponastar1984]

I have seen groups of kids hanging out together in driveways in my neighborhood. They definitely weren't distancing from each other. I know that teens are getting restless but the longer we bounce around the longer this virus is going to be hanging around. I posted something similar to your comments on nextdoor and got snapped at as well. All I can do is protect my family and roll my eyes when I see these gaggles of teens.

 

[kdonnel]

When this all started and I thought the mortality rate was in the 5-10% range I made my 20 and 17 year olds socially distance. My 20 year old had the choice of staying at her college apartment or coming home but could not do both. My in-laws live in the basement and we needed to be extremely vigilant to protect them. I was terrified.

Now that it appears the mortality rate appears to be in the .4-.5% range I have dramatically loosened the restrictions. My 20 year old is free to go and do as she wants and to return home. I am no longer terrified, mostly just bored now.

My 17 year old wants to continue to socially distance. My 20 year old is living her life again. Spending time with friends at parks, at homes, and cars.

I believe we have done what was needed with the lock down and it is time to open up. If the hospitals become overwhelmed again, then we lock down again. Rinse and repeat as this is the new normal for the foreseeable future.

Life has to continue.

 

[Boardwalk Jedi]

Yes. All of the playgrounds, athletic fields and basketball courts have been closed since 3/16. My 19 year old has gone on bike rides and runs with one other and they keep apart, and has attended small outdoor gathering (8 tops) with her closest friends, chairs 6 feet apart. Dd17 has parking lot meetups sitting on cars (no driving together), ds17, after a few cheats he got in trouble for in the first couple of days (soccer field, basketball court, so hard because he and his friends go there all of the time to play) now takes solo bike rides and sees his friends on Xbox only. We have daily family walks.

Nice! I've had a few walks with each kid too, and I love hearing about the beach chair in the parking lot meet ups. DS15 fishes and DH or older son went with him the first few times to make sure he didn't cheat or get pressured into getting too close. The city I work in kept the parks open but took down the basketball hoops - that was huge.

 

[AgentMama]

It's hit or miss here. We are not allowing our kids to hang out with other kids regardless of what other parents are doing. It sucks and we all miss true interactions with our friends and family, but until this is better understood, we will keep social distancing, even when our area starts to relax standards. There just isn't enough known about this virus yet.

 

[SPLzero]

I just keep stressing that we are making choices that are best for the biggest number of people, even if there's a low chance we ourselves would be affected. They get it, but I know they're frustrated.

Am I missing something when was elderly the majority?

 

[Boardwalk Jedi]

When this all started and I thought the mortality rate was in the 5-10% range I made my 20 and 17 year olds socially distance. My 20 year old had the choice of staying at her college apartment or coming home but could not do both. My in-laws live in the basement and we needed to be extremely vigilant to protect them. I was terrified.

Now that it appears the mortality rate appears to be in the .4-.5% range I have dramatically loosened the restrictions. My 20 year old is free to go and do as she wants and to return home. I am no longer terrified, mostly just bored now.

My 17 year old wants to continue to socially distance. My 20 year old is living her life again. Spending time with friends at parks, at homes, and cars.

I believe we have done what was needed with the lock down and it is time to open up. If the hospitals become overwhelmed again, then we lock down again. Rinse and repeat as this is the new normal for the foreseeable future.

Life has to continue.

While you can't control your 20 year old, you are simply wrong about thinking we already have done what's necessary. Most COVID patients I dealt with this week were 21-43 years of age and for every three that had few symptoms, one was suffering severe body aches. Please think of others.

 

[design_mom]

People aren't doing particularly well about it around here either. It's like people didn't take it seriously at first, then got better... but now they are "getting tired of it" (who isn't) and that's making it easier for them to justify their decisions.

I took my daughter (turns 16 tomorrow) out this weekend to practice driving and we saw several groups of teens roaming around together who are NOT siblings. Our next door neighbor keeps having friends over to hang out on their deck. (It's usually the same people, so maybe they're keeping their circle small, but they are not social distancing when they're together). The kids' elementary school gym teacher lives down the block and he always seems to have a yard full of kids (not just his).

Then, last Saturday was supposed to be the junior-senior prom. It was canceled, but apparently numerous people decided to hold "their own prom" and there were groups of kids dressed up in their dresses, posing for pictures, then having dinner at someone's house. I understand the "these kids are missing out on so much..." thing, but seriously, people? Will it be worth it if someone gets sick?

 

[mjkacmom]

Nice! I've had a few walks with each kid too, and I love hearing about the beach chair in the parking lot meet ups. DS15 fishes and DH or older son went with him the first few times to make sure he didn't cheat or get pressured into getting too close. The city I work in kept the parks open but took down the basketball hoops - that was huge.

Same, all of the hoops are gone. One of my friend groups met up in a church parking lot one morning, and now that it’s finally getting warm we can do some socially distant lawn happy hours.

 

[kdonnel]

While you can't control your 20 year old, you are simply wrong about thinking we already have done what's necessary. Most COVID patients I dealt with this week were 21-43 years of age and for every three that had few symptoms, one was suffering severe body aches. Please think of others.

I believe the stay at home orders primary purpose was to alleviate stress on the medical facilities. We have done that. If the facilities become stressed again, we have a new stay at home order. We can not stay at home forever.

Life goes on.

 

[siren0119]

When this all started and I thought the mortality rate was in the 5-10% range I made my 20 and 17 year olds socially distance. My 20 year old had the choice of staying at her college apartment or coming home but could not do both. My in-laws live in the basement and we needed to be extremely vigilant to protect them. I was terrified.

Now that it appears the mortality rate appears to be in the .4-.5% range I have dramatically loosened the restrictions. My 20 year old is free to go and do as she wants and to return home. I am no longer terrified, mostly just bored now.

My 17 year old wants to continue to socially distance. My 20 year old is living her life again. Spending time with friends at parks, at homes, and cars.

I believe we have done what was needed with the lock down and it is time to open up. If the hospitals become overwhelmed again, then we lock down again. Rinse and repeat as this is the new normal for the foreseeable future.

Life has to continue.

Just to address your point - the mortality rate is only part of the story. I'm fortunate to have a lot of educated people in my circle (including an immunologist, a biotech researcher, and a gaggle of medical professionals), so I've had lots of people to ask questions and get real, non-media driven answers. They are finding that if the virus isn't fatal, it IS causing long term lung damage. And they are still investigating the blood clotting issue that seems to accompany younger people contracting the virus, but that has dangerous implications as well. That is in addition to the fact that the lockdown was never meant to STOP the spread, just slow it enough that hospitals wouldn't become overwhelmed. They are still overwhelmed in MANY parts of the country (mine included). Maintaining social distancing and wearing a mask around other people contributes to keeping the flow of new cases and the hospital loads at manageable levels. Opening things back up and then locking down again if hospitals become overwhelmed again is akin to sticking your finger in a dam full of cracks - it's not an "IF" scenario.

What is going to mitigate this in the future is a vaccine and a better handle on treatments that get people healthy again with minimal long term damage (we're not there yet but there's progress every day). In the meantime, maintaining social distancing and doing our part to keep our germs from spreading to others IS slowing the spread enough to keep medical resources from drowning and buying us precious time - which means if people listen and follow guidelines, things CAN reopen slowly sooner than later. If people don't listen, it's literally going to drag things on longer.

 

[SaintsManiac]

I have no idea what other people are doing. We are staying home.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Some parents are upset about those not complying and post their frustration on facebook, then defensive parents snap back trying to justify their decisions.

I suspect that could depend on do they know the people or are they strangers.

For every post on Nextdoor about "I saw youths playing volleyball" there are people saying "hey..maybe mind your own business" which are then followed by "everyone needs to help everyone out" then followed by "how do you know those youths aren't related at all" then followed by "because xyz".. This plays out over various activites and areas.

I think it's fair to vent about the frustration, I think it's fair to vent about wanting to make the decisions for one's own family (which is on both sides).

 

[kdonnel]

Just to address your point - the mortality rate is only part of the story. I'm fortunate to have a lot of educated people in my circle (including an immunologist, a biotech researcher, and a gaggle of medical professionals), so I've had lots of people to ask questions and get real, non-media driven answers. They are finding that if the virus isn't fatal, it IS causing long term lung damage. And they are still investigating the blood clotting issue that seems to accompany younger people contracting the virus, but that has dangerous implications as well. That is in addition to the fact that the lockdown was never meant to STOP the spread, just slow it enough that hospitals wouldn't become overwhelmed. They are still overwhelmed in MANY parts of the country (mine included). Maintaining social distancing and wearing a mask around other people contributes to keeping the flow of new cases and the hospital loads at manageable levels. Opening things back up and then locking down again if hospitals become overwhelmed again is akin to sticking your finger in a dam full of cracks - it's not an "IF" scenario.

What is going to mitigate this in the future is a vaccine and a better handle on treatments that get people healthy again with minimal long term damage (we're not there yet but there's progress every day). In the meantime, maintaining social distancing and doing our part to keep our germs from spreading to others IS slowing the spread enough to keep medical resources from drowning and buying us precious time - which means if people listen and follow guidelines, things CAN reopen slowly sooner than later. If people don't listen, it's literally going to drag things on longer.

I have no doubts that there are still plenty of unknowns.

Based on the current data, I believe the risk to myself and my kids to be extremely low. Will that change in the future? Perhaps. Not long ago I thought based on the current data that the risk was extremely high.

In my area the hospitals were never overwhelmed and the stay at home orders have been lifted.

By venturing out we are not breaking any rules. When required we wear a mask. I still don't make unnecessary trips.

Everyone runs their own internal risk analysis. Mine says I am good to start living life again.

 

[BuckeyeBama]

I suspect that could depend on do they know the people or are they strangers.

For every post on Nextdoor about "I saw youths playing volleyball" there are people saying "hey..maybe mind your own business" which are then followed by "everyone needs to help everyone out" then followed by "how do you know those youths aren't related at all" then followed by "because xyz".. This plays out over various activites and areas.

I think it's fair to vent about the frustration, I think it's fair to vent about wanting to make the decisions for one's own family (which is on both sides).

Sometimes, when people simply will not do the right thing for the greater good, social shaming is our only way of fighting back.

Social shaming works, but it has to be directed and it has to be personal. Too many people today are afraid to shame others. But social shaming is actually helpful to our society overall.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

which means if people listen and follow guidelines, things CAN reopen slowly sooner than later. If people don't listen, it's literally going to drag things on longer.

I think many people realize what is driving the decisions is not necessarily tied to full compliance of citizens vs non. We were already told we wanted to 'drag' it out longer. You've seen the states, including mine, that the curve is now lower than initially predicted but at a longer timespan and that was with a stay at home order.

Decisions made by local leaders and state leaders are kinda all over the place.

In all honesty I think it's disingenious (and that's not a dig at you) to continue with the mantra "if people would only listen" because clearly that is not driving the decision making. You'll also have people convincing themselves they are complying with the order or the spirit of the order and yet they exhibit behaviors that aren't. Very few of us I think can claim we're perfect throughout this whole thing.

 

[BuckeyeBama]

Very few of us I think can claim we're perfect throughout this whole thing.

I don't think it takes anything even close to perfection for this to work - just everyone (or a high enough percentage) trying. Every bit of distancing reduces the R0, imperfect though it may be.