First Communion-During regular Mass Times

[OhMari]

I know many churches have incorporated the First Communion Ceremony during regular Mass times. I have worked for parishes where you can pick any Sunday Mass between the Sunday after Easter till Ascension Thursday.

The church I attend has room for only 175 people. We have always had an extra Mass on the last Sunday of April at a special time like 11:00 or 1:00 p.m. Mass for First Communion. Anyway, at a meeting I had with the staff, the Priest was upset, because he hardly saw any families in church this past Sunday whose children will be making their First Communion this coming Sunday. He made a really nasty comment on how they will all come decked out in their best clothes for First Communion and make such a big hoopla over First Communion. Then he said, next time I see them, they are in blue jeans. I was really speechless. He doesn't want to add another Mass on the weekend, because his Diocese's says they only have to do 3 Masses a weekend.

Then he told one of the maintenance people to make sure the video camera would be on, so if anyone got seated in the hall in the basement, they still could see everything on the wide screen tv.

I spoke up and said, "If I ended in the hall of church to watch someone special receiving their First Communion, I would really be upset." I told him I think it is a bad idea to have First Communion on a Saturday and during regular Mass time. Our church is just to small. He looked at me and didn't say a word. I thought, fine, fire me-at least I expressed what everyone else is saying."

 

[CamColt]

I had to chuckle at this post because my DS is making his First Communion next month and I am a bit disappointed at how it is done.

Ive always known other churches to have a special mass, usually on a Saturday, where all the First Communion kids make theirs together. However, our parish does it during the regular 9:00am mass, on 2 different Sundays, half the kids each time. The worst part about this, is most of DS's friends, who I know he would like to share this with, will be making theirs the first week, while him and 1 other friend are the second week.

The crowds are a good point too. The way we do it is each kid gets a row for their family, but anyone who doesnt fit there is on their own. I hadnt thought about people not fitting in, but being a regular mass, that is a possibility. I guess we get there early.

Good for you for speaking your mind. Hopefully they will think about what you said.

 

[gopherit]

I am the director of religious education for our parish, os it's my job to coordinate such things as 1st Communion, etc. We have a very small church and parsih -- probably 150 folks -- and in the summer, I'm amazed if I see more than 40 people at mass! We have 2 masses -- one on Sat night, one on Sun morning. Miss those, and you will have to head to another church in town!

To some degree, I can see why priests get frustrated. It's true -- many families see the pageantry rather than the purpose. The goal is to provide the child with the sacrament of the eucharist -- not just a Kodak moment. As director, I keep the records on how many kids we have at each grade level, attendance, etc. We see kids "show up" in our parish in the second grade,then disappear for the next 6 or 7 years, then show up again for confirmation. Once they are confirmed -- sometimes the entire family evaporates! My kids go to the parochial school and our parish provides tuition subsidies to the school for cstudents from parish families. THe priest quite often has complete strangers coming to him, wanting their forms signed (and their "catholic parishoner" tuition discount taken!) THis all happens in August... and by Sept or Oct, they vanish... only to return like capistrano swallows in the fall. So if your priest is frustrated, it may be because he feels the true meaning of the sacrament, of the faith, has been lost along the way, or has grown weary of accommodating parishoners that don't in turn support the parish and live their faith. Of course, he could also be a very particular priest, perhaps even unyielding or even cynical -- he's human, it happens. You would have a better feel for this.

That said -- Our parish always has 1st Communion on our regular Sunday mass. All the churches in town are the same way -- 1st comm on a designated pre-existing Sunday Mass time slot. We have 6 or 7 Catholic churches within a 30 mile radius, ours is the very smallest, most are 2 to 10 times larger than us, easily. There just isn't enough "priest power" to have a separate mass for only the communicants. Our parish is one of the very few that allows a separate mass for a baptism, if you so desire -- most of the other churches "lump you together" with other babies born near the same time! Another reason we use an existing service time -- our parish loves to watch the kids making their 1st communion! The date is announced well enough in advance that if you DON'T want to watch or face the crowds that may come, you can easily go to another mass or parish service. None of the local churches put their 1st comm on the same Sunday -- St. Ambrose was 2 weeks ago, our church was last week, St. Michael's is next week, St. Margaret Mary is the next -- you get the idea.

So how to manage the viewing if it's important to you. Well, bluntly put, if it matters to you, show up, and show up early. Each family gets one "row" (about 10 seats) reserved. You can either designate by alphabet, or by who shows up when! Our son made his 1st comm. last SUnday and we only had our immediate family present -- we "donated" our remaining 5 "prime" seats to another (bigger) family!

As for Saturday service -- well, you can look at it 2 ways. On the one hand, Saturdays may be easier for traveling family members to make. It probably won't be as crowded at the Sat. service (or would it? Is your parish more of a Saturday type parish?) Does the priest think that perhaps if it's on a Saturday it will have folks focusing on the sacrament, not so much the pagaentry? But then , I guess we all come to "expect" a First Comm. would be on a Sunday, don't we -- I guess I see trade offs either way.

I hope it's a wonderful service for all, regardless of which day it ends up or what time, and that it's a special event that the children involved can remember positively (and not with Aunt Mazie complaining she had to watch on the wide screen, or Mom and Dad mad at the priest, or whatever!) Good luck and let us know how it turns out!

 

[tjmw2727]

We have a special 1st Communion Mass on Saturdays, 3 Saturdays actually with 2, a 10am and an 1pm!! That is 6 total so there is no way we could do it at a regular Mass. This year in our parish over 250 children will receive 1st Communion, my dd will be one of them. Each family puts in a request as to how many guests they would like to bring (max 10) and are assigned a row. Each child makes a banner to hang on the pew.

We are 'encouraged' to attend the Childrens Mass each Sunday but are welcome at any Mass in any attire. The Communion class practices the music in the church right after the childrens Mass and then is walked to the parish school next door for class, so its a good fit and we usually do attend.

I am lucky that the Priests are wonderful and accept us at any Mass in any attire and happy to have the congregation and celebrate together. We see kids in cheering uniforms and sometimes even hockey gear - whatever it takes. Personally, our family likes to dress for church but if we had to choose between attending in soccer gear or not attending we will attend in soccer gear and hit the game after (late if need be).

Good luck with the upcoming celebrations.
TJ

 

[DisneyMomx7]

It's so disappointing how many churches are doing this. We've been told this First Communion in May will be the last "special Saturday FIrst Communion Mass". Next year it will be part of a regular mass. Of course my dd will be making FIrst Communion next year. It will seem so different than my other children's FIrst Communion. It almost feels as if they are cheapening it.

 

[bananiem]

Our dd made hers during a special 1:00 Sunday mass. Then 2 years later the powers that be came up with the idea to have it on Holy Thursday night!!! Well, I raised a stink because that mass is already crowded and no out of town family could come without taking at least 2 vacation days to travel. They ended up letting the parents of the 50 kids vote on either Holy Thursday or a special Sunday mass. The special Sunday mass won, thankfully.

 

[Kath816]

I'm an employee of a Catholic school. This is how we do it (for better or worse). First Communion is held on two Saturdays. It alternates year to year between the school & the CCD going first. The Mass is a Saturday morning at 10:00 for school. The other Saturday involves two Masses for CCD. I guess you can say that our parish is pretty large. There is not special seating - it's first come first served, except for the room mothers of the school as they are very involved in special activities. (I don't know about CCD seating as I don't attend those Masses.) Some years it has gotten out of hand with the guests, but as with anything, a few people can ruin things by loud talking, jumping out of seats to run around with video cameras even when warned not to, etc. I'm sure that type is behavior is part of what frustrates priests, as it does ours.

My nephew & niece are receiving this year. My niece will be receiving at a Sunday Mass (each family gets a row). My nephew is receiving at a special Saturday service. The services are the next two weeks. They got to pick the preferred date.

As an aside, during our Catholic Schools Week Sunday Mass, a woman walked in a front side door, across the whole front of the church. On the table is a book that 8th grade Confirmation students must sign in at Mass. She proceeds to write in the book, and cross back in front of the whole PACKED church and back out the door. I know this irritated me more than I can say, I can just imagine what the priest must think! Maybe people like that ruin it for many.

 

[georgina]

Our parish has too many children to do it at one special Mass, so we can pick any Mass out of 5 weekends. I like it better this way - we can pick something our out-of-town relatives can attend. I don't think it cheapens it at all, these types of celebrations rightly belong to the whole parish, as part of a regular Sunday Mass.

 

[disykat]

I'm not Catholic, but I'll weigh in anyway - what the heck! I'm Lutheran and in my congregation we try to do first communion during regular worship, dividing up the kids if necessary to allow for crowds. I think keeping it as a part of a regular worship service which involves the entire worship community makes it more meaningful, not less. My youngest is in first communion class right now.

 

[JerseyJanice]

When I received First Communion way back in 1970, a Mass was held on a Saturday afternoon for the children receiving and their families. Because this is the peak of the baby boom, there were a lot of children receiving, and families each got x number of tickets to attend.

I remember that all of the boys were on one side of the church and the girls on the other. We marched up in height order (shortest going first--short me was number three!) with the girls one side and the boys on the other, so we received Communion as a boy-girl pair.

Fast forward to 2004, when my son received last year. There were about 90 children in my parish receiving First Communion last spring. They selected 3 Saturday evening Masses and 3 Sunday noon Masses for you to choose from; it worked out to 15 children receiving at each of the Masses selected.

On the plus side, there was plenty of room in the Church if you wanted to invite a crowd. And anyway, you did get one pew near the front specifically for your family, where you hung a pew banner decorated with your child's name on it.

Remembering my Communion and my younger brother and sister's, it was awfully cute to see several pews filled with boys and girls dressed for the occassion. It seems like that way of doing it is gone around here now. My friends and extended family who have received in recent years all had it similar to the way my parish does it.

 

[BuckNaked]

The parish where we attend incorporates First Communion into Sunday mass, and they spread it over 3 weekends. But at the parish for our school, they have 3 special masses on consecutive Saturdays. One is for CCD, one is for the kids in the school, and one is a Hispanic mass.

Each of our kids received at the school's parish rather than at our parish.

 

[delilah]

The parishes in our area don't consistently do First Communion one way or the other. We actually have four Catholic churches within the same commuting distance of our home, none are real close. At the parish we belonged to when our son was born, First Communion was at one of the Sunday Masses, but, they didn't consistently note this fact in the Sunday bulletin. So, more than one time, our little family was turned away from Mass at the door of the Church. Now, this was a huge parish, and to accomodate us, they had a second Mass in the school gym at the same time.

Now we attend a smaller parish, where my son attends school. He is now in first grade. Last Thursday evening, there was a special Mass for young children that instructed them in items on the altar and parts of the Mass. First graders were invited to attend, and we did. Our little church was very nearly at capacity with just the kids making first communion and their parents. Obviously, they are having a special Mass for First Communion, our church just couldn't accomodate that during the normal masses on Sunday with guests. The priests in our area are very accomodating, though.

 

[golfgal]

Our church has First Communion during the regular 10:00 Mass, we have 5 different Masses so people can pick another one if they like. Sometimes, if the classes are large, they will have it at two masses (DS12's class had 100 kids making their First Communion so they had two masses). Between the two masses they have all the kids come for pictures so they get a picture of all the kids. I like having it as part of the mass, although I don't often go because seating is at a premium and I don't like taking up a seat that could go to a family member.

Growing up, we didn't have a big First Communion day. Kids made their FIrst Communion through out the year, you met with the priest and picked a weekend. Most kids made it with their best friends. After the homily, the priest called you up to the alter and gave you your certificate, your family brought up the gifts and you were the first person to receive communion that day. I liked doing it that way, it made the day more personal.