Quarantine and chill and kindness chatty clubhouse: Jump in and join the conversation! All is welcome!

[Snowysmom]

Now I have a question for you..how does one go about beginning to meditate. Is there a website or something that tells you how to go about it? TIA

I went to mindful.org. A friend of mine recommended it. There are free meditations and you can pay to join and have more choices. I use the free ones. I just go to the top of page and select meditation and then guided meditations. There are meditations for stress, anxiety, compassion, and many other issues. There are several for people just starting out with meditation that introduces you to the concept. Some people like the app Calm. I believe there is a free trial but you do have to pay eventually but it isn't much. I also have a CD by Jon Kabat Zinn who taught mindfulness at Mass Medical center. I like his guided meditations too. The one I really like is a mountain meditation CD. Amazon has a good selection of guided meditation CDs if you like that.

 

[lynxstch]

I went to mindful.org. A friend of mine recommended it. There are free meditations and you can pay to join and have more choices. I use the free ones. I just go to the top of page and select meditation and then guided meditations. There are meditations for stress, anxiety, compassion, and many other issues. There are several for people just starting out with meditation that introduces you to the concept. Some people like the app Calm. I believe there is a free trial but you do have to pay eventually but it isn't much. I also have a CD by Jon Kabat Zinn who taught mindfulness at Mass Medical center. I like his guided meditations too. The one I really like is a mountain meditation CD. Amazon has a good selection of guided meditation CDs if you like that.

Thank you so much! Off to check out that website!

 

[dazedx3]

Kirby.... a 3 gallon tote??? Now I'm embarrassed to admit I have at least eight 25 gallon totes. one 40gallon tote, and another 15 assorted boxes of Christmas decorations. That doesn't count the outside decor. I think I probably need an intervention of some kind. This is after purging the last two years.

 

[easyas123]

Greetings to everyone. I feel like I haven't posted here in forever, but in actuality it's just been a few days.
It's been a busy few days, we had a possible covid exposure at one of our jobsites, one that is in a sensitive industry, so I had to notify several higher-ups at that facility. Then send those affected employees off to get tested and home until after the holiday and they get their results back.

Youngest came across a young dog he thought was hit yesterday morning. He stopped to check on him and the dog got up and jumped right into his truck. So we got the poor thing something to eat and drink - he was exhausted and starving. Didn't appear hit, but did appear to have been living rough for a few days. Long story short, he wasn't chipped but between us, Animal Control & the Humane Society in the next county over plus a relative on Facebook, he was reunited with his owner. Hopefully they get him chipped & fixed, something I think the Humane Society will address with the owner.
So yesterday ended up being a very busy day. Today I had to run around hell & creation and I suspect tomorrow morning will bring the same.
Boys moved my dining table around for me last night. to make room for everyone & a small buffet Thursday. I forgot to get the turkey out of the freezer Saturday - so it didn't start to thaw until Sunday! I hope it thaws enough, might have to do a water bath tomorrow afternoon prior to putting it in the brine.

I'm trying to recall everything everyone discussed in past few days - my memory is spotty!!

Carol - that stinks about the settlement falling thru. Fingers crossed it's not on the market to much longer. Ditto on the Thanksgiving plans falling thru. Its starting to look like our Christmas plans may also fall thru. Plans being my folks were gonna drive up from Florida for 3 or 4 weeks. I'm pretty sure that they are changing their minds - my father doesn't want to get "trapped" in Maryland whilst in the midst of a project in Florida.

Meditation - forget who brought this up, but it has always fascinated me. I'm stuck on how to actually start though! My mind wanders so much ...I would love to take a TM course someday soon. There is a center about a hour away, and I was loosely considering it prior to all this nonsense starting. I do much better with in person instruction, and feel I miss a lot of it (same with yoga) when utilizing online instruction. It really is something I'd love to learn, I understand the health benefits are substantial.

Christmas lights - starting putting mine up outside. I refuse to do any Christmas décor inside until after Thanksgiving. I'd like to be able to have them finished and flip the switch Thanksgiving night. I could honestly do with a lot less fuss this year but my taller half really likes Christmas and seems to need it more than ever this year - thus I have decided to put in a bit more effort than I might normally. I think I could retire on all the twinkle lights I've put up on the porch so far! Two gold stars to whomever invented zip ties, because I'm halfway thru my second 100 pack of them! I do hope I can put him off on putting up the tree until at least mid- month.

QOTD - thanks to everyone for their stuffing suggestions. I'm going with my tried & true cubed bread stuffing (basic, celery & onions) and this year I'm adding a cornbread & sage sausage for the fun of it. I feel like the eldest & husband will enjoy it a lot. So yeah, this year we will be a two stuffing family...oo la la fancy!

Bit of a mystery for us - for as long as I can recall my MIL has made and sent my husband candy many times over the years. Like, pounds of it. It's that hard candy stuff - it's not his thing but his mother holds particular opinions on what he should like, so he just graciously accepts it every year. Anyway, his brother got his several weeks ago and I've been teasing him that his mother forget him (it's happened before- she is selective when it comes to us...) . He didn't think to much of it until yesterday when in the mail we received what had started out as a USPS express mail envelope STUFFED with more of this rock candy that it could hold. So much so that the envelope split in the middle and someone - at some point in time - had used packing tape to re-close it and then to tape the two pieces of the envelope back together. Truly it looks like it had been run over and to war & back. The envelope had a tracking number sticker on it that was dated 2014. There was no postage attached to it at all. The candy was in small bags, then in a larger bag. Half pulverized and smaller bags open. So we can't tell if this stuff has been lost in USPS hell for the lost 6 years OR my MIL successfully reused a envelope that was ripped in half from 6 years ago????????? Honestly, as wonky as the USPS can be you can see it happening. But as nutty as my MIL is, we can envision her reusing a ripped envelope from 2014 -unfortunately she is a hoarder so it's entirely possible - also bringing up the questionable age of the candy! Husband tossed it immediately and plans to act as if nothing is out of the ordinary next time they speak. They only speak every few months, and they don't live near us so, so it could be worse I guess.

Headed to the bakery up at the farmers market to pick up my order - rolls, pumpkin roll, pumpkin pie & cheesecake.- tomorrow morning. We already decided to close the office early, once mail gets delivered then I'm sending everyone home. A bit bummed our weather is going to be 'warmer' & wet. High of 66 or so, and rain all morning and most of the afternoon. We always have a fire. always. So we will be the yahoos with the fireplace going and the windows open. Last I heard the boys still going duck hunting that morning, so it'll just be me & the pups eying up the champagne and wondering when it's a good time to have mimosas. I wonder what the parade will be like? I always have it on, although rarely do I sit down and actually watch it. It's more like background.

Dinner last night was oven fried chicken. This evening is sword fish over cilantro/lime rice. I've got no idea what tomorrow night will me. Pizza?

 

[flyingdumbo127]

It warmed up here nicely. Always warms my heart to come back to new posts as well

Extra hugs always to all dealing with the need for Covid testing and/or quarantine. Easyas123, thank you for helping the dog! I will pray his future continues to be brighter.

As for guided meditation, I don't know much about it. To anyone interested my church does offer via Zoom a Wednesday night meditation service. I have never participated in this but know the Associate Pastor heads it up, she's a great lady. I don't know how much longer it will be continuing because she is set to retire at the end of this year.

 

[PollyannaMom]

Youngest came across a young dog he thought was hit yesterday morning. He stopped to check on him and the dog got up and jumped right into his truck. So we got the poor thing something to eat and drink - he was exhausted and starving. Didn't appear hit, but did appear to have been living rough for a few days. Long story short, he wasn't chipped but between us, Animal Control & the Humane Society in the next county over plus a relative on Facebook, he was reunited with his owner. Hopefully they get him chipped & fixed, something I think the Humane Society will address with the owner.

So glad for the happy ending!!

Christmas lights - starting putting mine up outside. I refuse to do any Christmas décor inside until after Thanksgiving. I'd like to be able to have them finished and flip the switch Thanksgiving night. I could honestly do with a lot less fuss this year but my taller half really likes Christmas and seems to need it more than ever this year - thus I have decided to put in a bit more effort than I might normally. I think I could retire on all the twinkle lights I've put up on the porch so far! Two gold stars to whomever invented zip ties, because I'm halfway thru my second 100 pack of them! I do hope I can put him off on putting up the tree until at least mid- month.

 

[Breezy_Carol]

@easyas123, I love that candy story.

DH and I sat down and ordered gifts for the 2 grandkids. All from Amazon except one from Kohls. Mostly I picked stuff from the lists their mom made and researched and then we looked and decided. Plus added some ideas of our own and tried not to go overboard. DH wanted to get DGS a firetruck. DH has a thing for them and got DS one at a very young age too. I found 3 I thought were age appropriate and let him chose. It was at the Kohls second closest to us so I ordered with curbside pickup and we went and got it. Surely a different way to shop this year.

On the way home we went to Dunkin drive through for a treat so dinner will be late tonight.

For anyone interested, one of our church members, the former pastor's wife, is a clinical social worker who does a lot of mindfulness workshops. Very similar to meditation. After the church shut down, she started doing Mindfulness Mondays each week. Here are the archived files.

 

[easyas123]

thank you for helping the dog! I will pray his future continues to be brighter.

thank you - honestly, thanks. It's hard - I found myself mentally angry at owner because he wasn't chipped & wasn't fixed and had obvious gotten away/out several days ago and had to haul my self right back into a place of not being holier than thou so-to-speak. I mean, he was part beagle so maybe he took off after something and wandered away - plus he was young and so maybe they were waiting to get him fixed (I waited till our youngest dane was a year old to get him fixed) and then I took a moment last night to look at our dogs collars. For all my going on about him not being chipped would you believe our dogs had lost their tags and I hadn't even noticed?! Here I was *****ing about someone not chipping their dog when my own dogs no longer had tags and I hadn't even noticed. So it was a good lesson for me, and tomorrow I'm stopping at pet store for new tags! I am learning to live with not being able to save every animal, and those that are saved might not have the life I'd have given them, but it doesn't mean it isn't good...and this was a good lesson in remembering that. But thank you again for keeping him in your thoughts & prayers. All the good that can go out is needed, you know?

she started doing Mindfulness Mondays each week. Here are the archived file

thanks, I'm going to check that out. I'm starting to feel a bit overwhelmed. I think it was everything yesterday & today with the dog and the guys w/ the covid exposure and ALL the paperwork that comes with working in a bio-secure area - ugh. And my folks, geez I love them but somehow things are starting to pivot and in a few years I see me being the parent and them the kid and holy cow - I'm the only daughter, I have the in-law suite and my brothers & I are all on the same level in terms of the future, and honestly my folks are perfectly able and healthy active folks but I SEE THEM CHANGING and I'm like - "where is the people I used to know????" sometimes when I hear them explain certain decisions they've made. And my husbands parents are in a totally different situation and something is going to happen there and my husband is the only one with the flexibility and financial ability to handle stuff and when it hits the fan - sooner rather than later, we know it is coming - there is going to be such pile of crap on his shoulders that I'm trying to lay some ground work to be supportive of the upcoming situation.


And dang it, we were supposed to be on a trip of lifetime over these holidays. And I'm feeling sorry for myself that I'm not. I'll get over it. Goodness knows other folks have suffered worse. Just a bad week, you know?

BUT - husband is not hunting tomorrow, and we are closing the office early. He's already promised to hang all the rest of the Christmas lights, including fixing the ones I've fouled up and the ones at the end of the driveway and help me clean up and get the house ready for Thanksgiving. And he's offered to go to the butcher for me tomorrow to pick up the scrapple...I suspect he's going to come home with random items to fry whilst frying the turkey Thursday - not good for him but I'm going to keep my mouth shut this one time!

 

[flyingdumbo127]

Glad you got some shopping done, Carol! Thank you for posting the link as well.

Easyas123, you have a wonderful heart, I thank you!

 

[Snowysmom]

Mindfulness also helps with anxiety and stress. Jon Kabat Zinn has a course book that I read over 8 weeks. It helped focus me alot and the anxiety lessened. However 2020 happened and I lost focus. With meditation your mind will wander but they explain that it is expected. There are ways to refocus.

Thanks for helping the dog. I too get frustrated when I feel that people need to take better care of their pets. But I guess most people try their best.

 

[Breezy_Carol]

@easyas123, I am also glad you saved the dog. But you need to take care of yourself. Take a break, and a glass of wine, and relax a little. I don't know you but your post sounds like you are pretty stressed right now. Maybe the cinnamon donut stick will help. I sure would like one of their jelly donuts. I had one at Dunkin today but it wasn't the same.

 

[Kirby]

In two years we'll go down the Medicare road and pick supplemental insurance. I hope that prices don't go up too much between now and then. We're paying a little over $2000 a month for the two of us.

@dazedx3, I'm sort of a minimalist now, I don't enjoy having a lot of stuff around. I used to have tons of stuff that went out but as the kids got older I found that I didn't like having all that stuff out. I started pairing down about 10 years ago and a 3 gallon tote is where I'm at today, doesn't count the tree, it's a 3 foot artificial and in another box. We're putting it out Friday and I usually take it all down Christmas night or the day after.

My mom was looking good today. Her eyes were bright and she appeared to be in the present but she didn't talk much. Was interested in what was on her tv and her roommates tv. I could tell that she was trying to smile but couldn't quite get it there. I'll take what I can get.

Dinner tonight was pork tamales, Knorr Spanish Rice (we didn't care for it), avocado, two kinds of queso, chips, a new hot sauce we were trying out and sour cream.

 

[flyingdumbo127]

Hug, Kirby! I'm so glad your mom had a better day today. Over the last several years, I have pared down in stuff a lot. I realized for me, so much stuff had simply become stuff! It wasn't bringing any positive memory or present joy let alone being of any service to God. I can be very sentimental and have kept what matters most to me. One day post plague, it will be fun to shop for a few mini Christmas ornaments for a future indoor small Christmas Tree.

I caught the end of Montana Christmas. It wasn't the best of movies but I did enjoy what I saw of it.

Wishing each of you a good evening

 

[Pea-n-Me]

@easyas123 Big hugs! I can relate to a lot of what you‘ve said. I agree with Carol, be sure to take care of yourself with all the craziness! Thank you for helping the dog, so glad he’s settled back home. And I hope all the Covid tests come back ok.

Mindfulness and meditation. I am a believer and I try to teach it to my patients who are facing difficult situations if they are looking for something, and open to it. I had to learn it myself when I was going through chemo. I had to have a support person take me in (to drive me home), but I would send them away to go explore the city while I concentrated on meditating during the infusions. I learned to put myself somewhere else by imagining the sights, sounds, smells, feelings, etc., of being in some of my favorite places. Often difficult to do, though, when you have so much on your mind. (With me it was having young kids, working, having a household to run and bills to pay, others to care for, etc.) But it did help get me get through it. I was fortunate to find a very good support center that helped me using various modalities for relaxation besides meditation, too - journaling, acupressure, Reiki therapy, counseling, retreats to healing gardens, and others. Believe it or not, learning forgiveness was a big thing they stressed to help lower stress by letting go of negative feelings. And appreciating life in new ways, and paying it forward, etc. An interesting journey, for sure.

At any rate, these are called Complementary Therapies. You use them in addition to regular therapies. (As opposed to Alternative therapies, which are used in place of regular therapies.) Some of you might find it interesting to know that Prayer is the #1 Complementary Therapy used worldwide! Meditation and Mindfulness are quite popular, too, as are many others. I became a Reiki practitioner myself, so I could help others, and I took the Mind-Body Medicine course with Dr Herbert Benson, the Father of Mind/Body Medicine. It was really cool listening to what he had to say, which was that, when you have a propensity to illness, stress can be the thing that pushes you over the line to an ill state. And stress is cumulative - so a lifetime of stress can be very harmful to one’s self. Everyone has some stress from time to time, it’s natural. But we need to find (healthy) ways to mindfully lower it, especially those of us who have had many stressors in our lives. (This year, of course, has been super stressful on practically everyone!)

The way things like prayer and meditation help lower stress is by forcing the mind to do something else besides worry; it literally takes your mind off it. One of the instructors in that course used an example of monks who have to stand with one leg up in prayer - it forces them to concentrate on what they’re doing so they can’t think about anything else for long. So even little things like breaking our routines when we’re stressed or getting out and doing the things we enjoy are really important to relaxing our minds. My support counselor had me wear my favorite color more often, buy myself flowers, listen to music in the car, etc. We all should be doing these types of things we enjoy for ourselves. I did buy myself flowers today, took the dog out to run and got a little photography in - before I hit the crazy grocery store! But you know what, when I came home I wasn’t stressed - got everything put away, made dinner, cleaned up dinner, and I was still feeling good. Endorphins are the natural hormones that our bodies release when we relax and find pleasure in things, and they stick around for hours! So it’s good to get in even 15 mins of that relaxation every day, if possible. (Looking at you @apirateslifeforme !)

I have noticed that many of you have your ways of de-stressing. Carol walks/hikes. Snowysmom goes to NH. PollyannasMom has her cat and does crafty things. Lynxstch gardens and cleans! Flyingdumbo prays and writes. Tazdev does photography and projects with the grandchildren. Merryweather cooks and bakes with the grandkids. Nycgrll shops and cooks for her granddaughter. Easy123 and AuntieM3 enjoy animals. Gwynne has her favorite TV shows. Tina/lovemygoofy enjoys homemaking. I don’t mean to omit others, but I am less sure what they do for relaxation! So these are things we should think about as we finish up this awful year and head into the next one! (Maybe I’ll make it a QOTD!) Oh, and btw, these are still things I often struggle with myself - God knows the last few years, and then this year, were really stressful for me and I still have a big To Do list, but I take it one day at a time and try to be as easy on myself as I can. There’s only so much you can do when things are as they are right now.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

11/25, QOTD: What types of things do you enjoy to help you relax, take pleasure in life, and lower your stress?

 

[chickapin parterre]

Good Morning!!!!....couldn't sleep, the moon was to bright outside....sleeping outside on large covered patio is very relaxing. love the cold air on my face. I just finished a 3 hour shopping spree at Goodwill....very quiet at night it terms of folks not bumping into each other, great music over the speakers, all kinds of jiggly songs to dance from my youth. On my feet builds my leg endurance,. 3 hours numbs my mind and music lowers my stress...unless I am stressing about what to buy..nothing great tonight...oh wait...i did buy my wife a huge cloth quitled cover for her air fryer...has this fantastic SW theme as art that fits with home...so can't wait for Christmas now for her to open the gift.

taking a shower is supposed to be relaxin, but I think that is why I am awake, showering and shaving at 9:00 at night does not relax me I guess...because here is 1:30 a.m MST is not an A.M. emoji face...this is how it should be ☀

 

[PollyannaMom]

11/25, QOTD: What types of things do you enjoy to help you relax, take pleasure in life, and lower your stress?

You definitely nailed mine - time with cats and crafty things!

The cats do their furry best to make sure I:
1) sit still for a bit every day
2) get outside in nature a lot
3) go to bed on time

And creative pursuits center me. They always have, since I was a kid. At different times, it’s been scrapbooking, sewing, candy making...even plastic canvas years ago. Lately, it’s been making homeschool materials for my honorary niece and nephew. (I love coloring with them, too!)

Another thing for me is needing time alone. It’s not that I don’t like people - I do! But as an introvert, real-time communication is “energy expensive” for me (unlike typing here - where I can think before I “talk” ) and I need that recharging time.

And last, but not least - I was just thinking just last night about how much routines comfort me. For instance, I've missed my usual evening treadmill time on quite a few days lately - just family life getting In the way, but I really feel “off” If it happens too much. And it's not as if I'm a huge fitness person or anything - I only walk for about 20 minutes, but I generally start an episode of whatever show I’m watching on Disney+ on the iPad while I'm walking, then finish it while doing the dishes, and I realized it’s become a predictable pattern. With this being such an unpredictable year, I think little things like that matter more.

Anyway, great question, Pea!!

 

[Breezy_Carol]

Good morning.

Plan to finish cleaning the house today even though no one is coming over.

And changing the sheets and moving back into the master bedroom. DH wasn't feeling great so I moved to the guest room. He is back to normal but I did discover the guest room is quote comfortable.

11/25, QOTD: What types of things do you enjoy to help you relax, take pleasure in life, and lower your stress?

@Pea-n-Me you are very observant about who does what to relax. And you were right that walking out in nature does me a world of good. These colder months are going to be hard. I also like to read "beach read" type light books. And I knit caps hats with my left over yarn to donate to the Empowerment Center at our church.

Off to pay bills. Meeting DD at a Wawa this afternoon to trade off foods we are prepping for tomorrow. She has the turkey to give me to cook. She will be in the area doing a home visit for work.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

A happy update:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/ar...ristmas-tree-New-York-City-released-wild.html

 

[easyas123]

Take a break, and a glass of wine, and relax a little. I don't know you but your post sounds like you are pretty stressed right now. Maybe the cinnamon donut stick will help

Thank you! I did all three & the doughnut this morning to boot, plus a half decent nights sleep and I'm feeling much more 'myself' this AM!

My mom was looking good today

Excellent, that's good to read.

And I hope all the Covid tests come back ok.

Good news, one fella got his results back already - negative. most of the other guys are expecting theirs later today, and one guy was told 3-5 days. Fingers crossed everyone is negative.

acupressure, Reiki therapy

I actually have a regular acupuncturist whom I love - regrettably she had to temporarily close down her practice as she has her 93 year old MIL living with her. So I can't get in to see her again until after things calm down. She's not woo-woo but more scientifically minded which I appreciate. She does wonderful work, and it's amazing how helpful she's been. Thru her I also saw a reiki practitioner as well...I had been wanting to give it a try for a while, and both sessions were good experiences. I plan on picking it back up once I can. The massage therapist I use has once again started taking appointments and I'm going to get in there sooner rather than later, which I think will be very beneficial to me!

Took Carols advice last night, took a mental chill pill, enjoyed a glass of wine, watched a little fluff TV, tried to get some sleep and woke up feeling more myself! By 9:30 this morning I had already gotten my pick ups from the bakery & stopped for the last of the fresh veggies I need for tomorrow. Once the mail lady gets here or noon hits I'm closing down shop. I do need to remember to take out the extra turkey wings from the freezer and I need to mentally wrestle how I'm gonna brine the turkey later today. I've decided that this afternoon we will get done what we can get done and at 7 PM I'm calling it a day. Will have a soak in the tub and indulge in a bit of nonsense TV. Whatever gets done in terms of Christmas lights up and house cleaning is what gets done and what doesn't get done can certainty wait!

11/25, QOTD: What types of things do you enjoy to help you relax, take pleasure in life, and lower your stress?

These past few months I've slacked big time with exercise & yoga - both things I know I will feel better if I start back with them, so that I need to do. My husband and I take a lot of walks around our farm and a year ago we treated ourselves to a therapeutic hot tub which we enjoy several times a week, it was a best big ticket item we've ever treated ourselves to! We talk about and pre-plan a lot of travel as well, we can't wait to get back to traveling again, we just love it. And I love to read! I will make time to read, leave dishes for later, let the vacuuming wait - just to read.