Note to parents of younger children

[SandraC]

glad we are renting a car

SandraC, visit our Disney family web site www.angelfire.com/on/disneyfun
º0º
1975 - off site (11 years old),
1977 - off site (13 years old),
1987 - Indian Rock Shores (23 years old with hubby, b/f at the time),
1990 - Holiday Inn International Drive/Daytona Beach (26 years old, with hubby, six month after wedding),
1998 - KIDS VILLAGE, GIVE KIDS THE WORLD, Make-a-Wish trip with 4.5 year old daughter born ill),
2001 - CBR - ON SITE FIRST TIME! YIPPY! With dd 7 years old, ds 15 mo

 

[ceopa]

We went to WDW last year at Spring Break with three kids under 5. We stayed at the All-Stars, and invariably, they packed the buses to capacity. We also made a point of not getting on a bus without seating room. That said, we were on buses (even in the mid-afternoon) w/ 2 of 3 of our children sleeping, two lightweight umbrella strollers, and the bus packed so full that the person in front of you would have to breath out for the person behind them to breath in (this is a quote from a Disney bus driver -as he directed everyone to squeeze onto the bus!). My husband give up his seat and get up holding a sleeping toddler and a stroller for any elderly person, woman or child. He also has directed other young healthy people to give up their seats. It is the right thing to do, whether you are at Disney or not.

Aside from that, Disney should have an adequate number of buses that overcrowding (children and infirm folks standing in the aisle is unsafe - would you let a child stand in the aisle on a school bus?) does not occur, and is certainly not encouraged by bus drivers. My husband spoke to the manager of the hotel about this, and they said this certainly should not occur. Well it did our entire trip.

As for the warning to parents, I try not to judge other people's decisions, especially in the very limited context you describe. That child may have taken a 4 hr nap in the afternoon - utimately the parent is responsible for the child and knows that child best. All you can control is your own behavior. Obviously, you felt you did the right thing. I believe most parents try to do the right thing for their kids too.

 

[LisaR]

Our first trip with our daughter was five years ago when she was a year old. We did not rent a car. The busses were jam packed. The asiles were so full of people standing that at the first stop, people had to get off the bus to let other people off and then get back on again. For this reason, we rent a car and will not use Disney bus transportation. I do not think it is safe for anyone to stand in a moving vehicle and especially not a child. Someday, Disney will have to answer to this in a court of law when some child gets seriously hurt. We'll stick to our rental car and bring a booster seat for our 6 year old and a car seat for our 3 year old.

 

[gingajane]

Personally, I would never presume that it was anyone's reponsibility to move for me or my children. Everyone has long exhausting, fun-packed days at Disney. You wait in line for the bus, you get a seat or you don't. If you don't like standing, wait for the next. Consideration for those in need is nice and pleasant when you are the recipient...but to think it is your right? I am not sure about that. I might wish to the dear God above that some kind soul would give me a seat, but I wouldn't get all bent and righteous if it wasn't offered either. Just thought I'd add my two cents!! MJ

 

[LvsTnk]

Believe me when I tell you that there have been people who would not give up a seat for my handicapped child(his special stroller folds up). Sometimes you don't know there are not any seats until it is too late. On the other hand, I had one Gentleman get off the bus to help me with him! So I have to agree we don't know what motivates people to act the way they do. I did learn early on(teen years)to keep my mouth shut and not talk about people who are within ear shot of my voice.

LvsTnk
'81CR, Poly
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[robinb]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Anyway, It didn't ruin my night...As a matter of fact I had completely forgotten about it until today.[/quote]

Given the number of replies you have, maybe it should have remained forgotten. I have not read the rest of the replies to your post because I do
not want what other people say color how I feel now.

I have a small daughter and have ridden the busses with her at WDW, often without my husband. Many people have bent over backwards to
help me when they see me get on the bus holding her in one arm and my stroller in the other. I have welcomed all help in the sprit it was given. In return, I have been sensitive to other parents who need help either with a
stroller, or a seat on the bus, or just a friendly smile.

If I were in the same situation as you were, I would have made every attempt to offer the woman with the child a seat. If I could not move, as
you said, I would have at least told the woman with the child that I was sorry that I couldn't give her my seat. IMO, it is not unreasonable for someone with a sleeping child to expect an able bodied person to give up a seat on a bus. I'm sure that she was snippy because she was tossed around and tired herself. I might have done much the same in the same situation. Of course, I'm known to be snippy .


-- Robin

 

[2badcats]

It sure is nice when someone offers their seat, but I don't expect it as a right. Who knows what aches and pains those folks have after a full day of chasing Mickey? And carrying sleepy, cranky kids is a WDW rite of passage (all my kids were just HUGE babies).

Having been there, done that, I always get up for elderly or moms with babies, but I don't want or need anyone to tell me to get up. And I certainly don't expect any men to give up their seats for me just because I'm a woman. It's really not a disability!

Meanwhile, tell Disney, Inc. to buy a few more buses

 

[Kallison]

Obviously she was not from Manahattan! I remember going to work with a cast on my ankle and having people grab taxi cabs from me in the pouring down rain. I too would try to offer my seat, but as someone posted previously it is not your god given right. There were times that the buses are just too packed to move around. If you really want that seat, then wait for the next bus. We saw many families with young kids doing just that. Personally we would rather get back to our room, if that meant standing, then that is what we do.

 

[sha_lyn]

Show me any child who doen't fall alseep in a moving vehicle (except my DD when she was an infant, she would scream the whole time). My DS is almost 12 and he can get up from 11 hours sleep get in the car and be asleep before we are 1 mile from the house. The boy was just doing what children naturally do. To blame the mother for kepping him out too late with out having any idae how long thay had been in the park, if he napped etc ir ridiculous.

<font color= red Comic Sans MS> All Star Music-April 2000 </font>
<font color= purple font= Comic Sans MS> Shades of Green- DEC 2001 </font>

 

[ceopa]

I do not believe being a woman is a disability. If my husband offered you (as a women)his seat, I would hope you would just say "no" and not be offended.

I hope that all those who are not satisfied with Disney's bus transportation express their concerns to resort management as we did. This is the only way to improve the conditions and avoid the type of situation that sparked this debate. This is certainly the most fruitful outcome of this discussion...

 

[CUNDIZNE]

Several kids are always asleep on the bus at the end of the day - including mine- it's really nobody else's business if they are exhausted or not-you shouldn't feel sorry for them-they have had a fun filled day. As for that lady, she was rude but you probably could have avoided the whole incident by minding your own business.

 

[Figaro30]

Okay let me just say one more thing and then i'm ending this conversation and move on to a lighter subject.

First off, I have a 15 year old son. So I know what it is all about!!!

Second of all people keep saying it was not my business. THAT WOMAN MADE IT MY BUSINESS when she started yelling at me!!! If you don't want me involved....DON'T GET ME INVOLVED!!!

Lastly, my point to this was that people should just monitor their children more and expect that if they are to stay out later that their children might be sleepy and cranky along with themselves. And if you are going to run around all day then expect a most probable negative outcome and don't blame other people when it arises. Regardless of the reasons that this incident occurred it was of no right of the woman to start yelling at INNOCENT strangers. And yes, she should have waited for another bus that was emptier. Maybe I was wrong to generalize all parents and all situations and I apologize for that part. I shouldn't have done that. I got caught up in the moment. But for everything else I won't be apologizing for. I did nothing wrong.

Well I won't be responding to this post anymore because this post seems to have aggravated me 100x more than the original situation. So on that note, I think I'll keep to chatting about
POC.

 

[casmanuel]

It sounds like the woman thought you were making fun of her child. It really bothers me when people laugh at my children, and maybe your comments hurt her feelings. It's amazing how you can defuse a situation by saying, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings." As for the lecture, both of my kids can go from full speed to sound asleep in 30 seconds flat. They seem fine one second and the next thing you know they are asleep in their food, regardless of the time of day. It's part of being on vacation.

 

[isles_nyi]

Don't feel aggrevated or upset by the way this thread turned out. I found it informative and interesting and I think other people have too. All that you did was push a hot button. Whenever people are this passionate over a topic you know you've hit on a subject worth talking about.

It was a good exchange. Keep it up.

Disneyland - 1974
Disneyland - 1975
Disneyland - 1976
Disneyland - 1978
Disneyland - 1980
WDW - 1990
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WDW - 1999
WDW - 2001 (4/28-5/5)

 

[Figaro30]

Thanks fellow New Yorker. I've always enjoyed reading your comments on this thread and other threads as well.
(as you can see I couldn't stay away... I've answered this yet again.) I'm a glutton for punishment I guess.

 

[kaitlynangel]

I have a toddler, but that's not the point, the woman was wrong for taking her frustration out on you or anyone else. I think we know in our hearts what the right thing is to do but we supress it because we've been lulled into passiveness by our lack of thinking about anyone but ourselves.I have seen children run and fall down in front of me and I help them up if their mother is a few steps from the scene and I am closer. I have assisted another person open the door if they have heavy packages (regardless of sex or age.) We are all resposible for each other. We are humans, if we see someone in need, we help them. We don't do it for some reward, we do it because we have to share this world, why not help each other out. Whether the child was exhusted and falling down (for what ever the reason he is in the condition he's in does not matter)or a elderly person or hanicapped, we should do what's right, What's right to you might be differnet to what's right to me, that is true. But I can only hope someone goes out of their why for you, even if it puts them in a akward or impossible situation. We got on a Disney bus with our 20 month old and we had so much stuff (i.e. stroller diaper bag, my big pocketbook) that the only way we could sit on the bus was if my husband stood and I had my daughter on my lap, a young boy of 9 or so was told by his mother to help me with hold ing the diaper bag, so I gave it to him on his mothers request and he held it until we got off. What a mother to teach her child to help another person, regardless that he was the child and I was the adult. I think she has the same idea of what right is, that I have. Good luck to all those you don't believe that we are in this thing we call a "life" toghether and we are not responsible for making this place a little nicer to be in. Maybe the woman got s frustrated with people not caring about each other she took it out on you, this probably wasn't the first incident that she encounter with people turning their heads, maybe we sometimes don't notice that we are given an oppertunity to help out right at the moment when we could be of some help. I think your post will now help alot of others because you reported what that frustrated woman did to you. In the end i don't think she knows how loud her message really has become. Thanks for your story, maybe I'll have another plesant experience like I did on that disney bus or anywhere, because of this.

 

[Sharmaine]

Whose had the worst behaviour here? Obviously, the ladies who wouldn't give up their seats, especially since they were rude enough to comment on the situation! The ladies SHOULD have given up a seat. The lady with the child SHOULD NOT have had to ask.

I wish I was there, seated, but holding my own sleeping child. I WOULD have struggled to get up, to give that other lady the seat, and made sure those rude ladies saw me and were fully aware of this. I've done this kind of thing before in the midst of other rude passengers. Its very satisfying. One time I was 9 months pregnant, occupying a "priority seating" spot on a big city, crowded bus. A very elderly woman boarded, and one of my able seat mates gave up a seat. But a middle aged blind man with a limp also boarded. The other priority seating passengers (there were about 6 others besides my very pregnant self and the elderly lady) ignored the man - pretending they didn't notice his disability. Very unlikey that more than one or two of the seated were in anyway deserving of priority seating. So I got up to give the man MY seat. I enjoyed watching the pink glows appear on the faces as they tried to now ignore me. I smiled at them and made eye contact so they couldn't. Now in the situation under debate here, I think I might have struck up a converstation with the lady who took my seat "...those poor ladies who wanted to get up, but couldn't...I wonder what was wrong with them...arthritis, cancer...who knew...but wasn't it nice that they were able to get to Disney at all...and that they looked so happy in spite of their problems...I only hoped I would bear up so well under ill health conditions..."

There is no CAN'T here. That's a ridiculous excuse. I've been a public transit customer in big cities since I was 4. Thats 34 years of it. I've been on incredibly croweded vehicles where people could not only not move, but could hardly breath. Never ever ever ever ever seen a situation where a passenger physically could not give up a seat. Sure, it could be inconvenient - but not as inconvenient as it is for some lady to try and balance herself while underway on some pubic transport vehicle, while holding a sleeping child!

Most big city transit systems have rules about this. Special seats are designated for needy passengers. Those who have one and don't need it have to give it up if a needy passenger shows up. If Disney Transpo doesn't have this they should.
A parent carrying a sleeping child would qualify on any system - certainly even more so in a place like Disney.

I seriously doubt Disney would be there if it weren't for families with children - so they should be accomodated. People who can't tolerate tired cranky kids should stay away from Disney - or at least stay off the public transit system and other places where these families might be late at night. Let the intolerants go to one of those places where kids are barred after 7 pm. Public transport seats go to those who need them most, and ladies, parents carrying sleeping children need them more than your healthy selves with two hand free to hold on!

I'll be there in May for the first time...though not really thrilled to read I can expect to find ruder patrons on a bus at Disney, than I can on a crowded big city transit system. Is this what all this "Disney Magic" is about

 

[Figaro30]

I guess nobody can read.....

she wasn't holding the sleeping child he was standing.

 

[kaitlynangel]

Once again the point is being missed, whether the child was sleeping on the mother or sleeping on the floor, which at this point it seems as if nobody would give a heck if he or anyone for that matter was. The point is caring for your fellow human being, what part of this is everyone not understanding. Keep harping on why the child was tired, and you miss the human side to the story. Does the person deserving of help have to justify their condition to you before you deem them worthy. Maybe that disabled person who got on the bus, got hurt as a result of a DWI accident they caused, or maybe the blind man lost his sight in a bar fight that he caused. The point isn't how they got into the physical situation they are in but that they are in need of something you can do with out. the biggest issue in the orginal post was that the parents kept the kid up to long and he was nearly falling down from exhustion but it's not your responsiblilty to help, it's the parents responsibility. Yeah maybe they should have asked someone if they could have your seat. Since nobody thought to ask, that was her only fault. I at 32 have been falling down exhausted after a day at work and have had people offer me a seat and I am sure if somebody offered one to you then you can see how there is good in people. What is so shocking to me is how we defend our inability to raise to the occasion (old saying but applies here perfectly) and be bigger than the situation and help a human in need. If the issue is that the parents did something wrong then I can conceed that they had yelled, wrong approach but understandable since a child doesn't have a voice in this society and needs ADULTS to show them how to respect others.

 

[robinb]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>
The point isn't how they got into the physical situation they are in but that they are in need of something you can do with out. [/quote]

Brava!


-- Robin