Student drowns on class trip

[minniebeth]

Originally Posted by LuvOrlando

I am so sorry for your tragic loss, it must be very hard for you to share that story.

Every year we go the NJ Shore with lots of other families. Every year I drag my seat out to the front and stare at my kids, and the others, as they play in the surf. Every ear the other parents try to get me to sit by them, relax and have a drink, because the kids are all playing together and can look after each other.

Last year we came home on the Saturday after the 4th of July. That Saturday the surf was so rough I was terrified to even blink but peer pressure made me let my kids play with the others. After a few hours & as the tide changed I announced we had to get home so we packed up & left. When I got home I heard about a number of drownings that weekend around the LBI area... http://abclocal.go.com/wpvi/story?se...cal&id=6261845, needless to say I could have kicked myself for not listening to my own gut instincts.

Water has it's place as a fun pastime and we do enjoy it, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't fearful... I don't care what anyone says, water of any kind can be extremely dangerous

LuvOrlando,
See, I was just meant to read your post! I grew up in NJ and went to the Jersey shore every year. This will be the first time in 17 years my family will be vacationing at LBI with a big group of friends. Everyone says how relaxing it is and fun with partying on the beach while the kids go off to play...
I love the beach, but the thought of it all stresses me out becuase I will NOT be partying on the beach, reading my book or worshiping the sun while my kids go off to play on their own. I will be in my beach chair watching their every move...not being paranoid or helicopterish, but protecting them! It only takes one minute...I know our friends may roll their eyes at me, but reading your post made me feel better about my following my gut instincts...

[agnes!]

I am stunned stunned *stunned* by this thread, that so many of my fellow DIS'ers have lost a child and are willing to share such immense heartache. I am so sorry for all of you that have experienced these tragedies, I cannot begin to comprehend what you have gone through and are still going through.

Thank you, all I can say is maybe you've saved another child's life by sharing on this thread, someone you've never met might be more vigilant.

I have one daughter who's 16... every day I tell her I love her.

And to you,
agnes!

[raysnkaysmom]

Originally Posted by minkydog

I was at a city park which had a very large pool-like body of water. It had a large shallow area and an even larger deeper area, about 5-6ft deep. There were at least 12 lifeguards doing their job. I was there with my 4yo son and obviously I was sticking to him like glue.

There were so many kids in the water that day. A local summer camp had brought over about 500 children to picnic and swim. Nobody saw what happened but what we figured out is that one of the boys, around 8, followed his older brother out into the water, got out too far and went under. When the campers when to eat their lunches the counselors counted heads and realized they were missing one.

The lifeguards swept the pool in lines and found the boy limp, grey, and lifeless in about 5 ft of water. I have never been so profoundly affected. Those lifeguards did everything they could to revive him. Then the EMTs arrived and they worked on him. The counselor in charge was so hysterical they ended up having to take her to the hospital. The job of notifying the parents fell to police.

That was 17 years ago and the scene is still as vivid today as it was on that summer day. I often think about the boy's family and I would give anything to let them know I still remember their boy.

Originally Posted by mommytomy3

My story is similar to yours, although my son (almost 3) did not live through it
that is true about the colder water.. unfortunately, the pool was heated and very warm.. he was under maybe 90 seconds... it can happen SO fast, and it is Silent!

Originally Posted by piglet too

mommytomy3 ~ I am so sorry for your loss. I truly wish there was something more than words and a cyber hug that I could offer you.

Originally Posted by dicar123

What teachers/parents and chaperones SAY the rules are and what they do can sometimes be very different things.

Two years ago, I signed a permission slip for my 14 year old son to go on a field trip to a museum. It was an all day trip and we were asked to pack a lunch.

One of the teachers, after sending our permission slips, decided they would stop...somewhere...to eat afterwards. He didn't plan where to stop, he asked Mr. Random Bus Driver.

Mr. Random Bus Driver decided to go to a McDonalds on the corner of a busy downtown street at 4:00 on a weekday. That McDonalds happened to have no dining room, one carry out window, and outside seating for about 15 people. There were 70+ kids on the trip.

The teachers thought no supervison was necessary. One teacher said to his bus load of students- juniors and seniors, "Don't go out in that street and get yourself killed." The teacher on my son's bus (eighth graders and freshmen) told them they could go anywhere they wanted.

My son and several others decided not to use the crosswalk. The light for cross traffic was red, so cars were stopped. My son apparently decided that if he crossed quickly, he would be fine because the cars were stopped, right?

Wrong. He was hit by a car and killed.

There is no field trip on earth that is worth dying for at 14 years old. There is no field trip important enough to make it worth holding a student's hand as he lays dying in the street. There is no trip SO fun, SO exciting that it is worth watching a classmate die.

My younger son goes on field trips, but my husband or I (often both) go with him. We ALWAYS follow the rules and insist others do as well. Because we are usually given responsibility over our son and maybe one or two other children, one of us constantly evaluating the situation we are in for safety.

Field trips CAN be safe. But they often aren't because too many people don't do the right thing or become distracted.

Originally Posted by agnes!

I am stunned stunned *stunned* by this thread, that so many of my fellow DIS'ers have lost a child and are willing to share such immense heartache. I am so sorry for all of you that have experienced these tragedies, I cannot begin to comprehend what you have gone through and are still going through.

Thank you, all I can say is maybe you've saved another child's life by sharing on this thread, someone you've never met might be more vigilant.

I have one daughter who's 16... every day I tell her I love her.

And to you,
agnes!

I am a balling mess right now... Hugs to all of you who have gone through something so horrific... Words can't express my thoughts, but know that sharing your heartache can help at least one child...

[teresajoy]

Originally Posted by dicar123

What teachers/parents and chaperones SAY the rules are and what they do can sometimes be very different things.

Two years ago, I signed a permission slip for my 14 year old son to go on a field trip to a museum. It was an all day trip and we were asked to pack a lunch.

One of the teachers, after sending our permission slips, decided they would stop...somewhere...to eat afterwards. He didn't plan where to stop, he asked Mr. Random Bus Driver.

Mr. Random Bus Driver decided to go to a McDonalds on the corner of a busy downtown street at 4:00 on a weekday. That McDonalds happened to have no dining room, one carry out window, and outside seating for about 15 people. There were 70+ kids on the trip.

The teachers thought no supervison was necessary. One teacher said to his bus load of students- juniors and seniors, "Don't go out in that street and get yourself killed." The teacher on my son's bus (eighth graders and freshmen) told them they could go anywhere they wanted.

My son and several others decided not to use the crosswalk. The light for cross traffic was red, so cars were stopped. My son apparently decided that if he crossed quickly, he would be fine because the cars were stopped, right?

Wrong. He was hit by a car and killed.

There is no field trip on earth that is worth dying for at 14 years old. There is no field trip important enough to make it worth holding a student's hand as he lays dying in the street. There is no trip SO fun, SO exciting that it is worth watching a classmate die.

My younger son goes on field trips, but my husband or I (often both) go with him. We ALWAYS follow the rules and insist others do as well. Because we are usually given responsibility over our son and maybe one or two other children, one of us constantly evaluating the situation we are in for safety.

Field trips CAN be safe. But they often aren't because too many people don't do the right thing or become distracted.

Oh no, I can't even imagine your pain. I am so sorry.

[dicar123]

I just wanted to thank all of you for your kindness.

One of the issues we have really struggled with is getting people to understand what happened. All of the initial news reports stated the most obvious fact: My son ran across the street and wasn't in a crosswalk.

It was a HUGE story here (the accident happened one week before Christmas). It took 6 weeks, a lawyer and a round of media interviews explaining that the school administration was stonewalling us before enough pressure was applied to the Superintendent to defy the lawyers and tell us what happened that day.

By that time, the story was old news. Everyone thought they knew what happened. As a result, very little has changed, because my husband and I are the only people who think changes need to be made.

How do we tell our story without coming off as the lunatic grieving parents who want to blame everyone BUT their kid?

So, I'm noisy whenever I think I might be able to effect change in individuals. Thank you for allowing me the opportunity.

[merekc]

Originally Posted by dicar123

I just wanted to thank all of you for your kindness.

One of the issues we have really struggled with is getting people to understand what happened. All of the initial news reports stated the most obvious fact: My son ran across the street and wasn't in a crosswalk.

It was a HUGE story here (the accident happened one week before Christmas). It took 6 weeks, a lawyer and a round of media interviews explaining that the school administration was stonewalling us before enough pressure was applied to the Superintendent to defy the lawyers and tell us what happened that day.

By that time, the story was old news. Everyone thought they knew what happened. As a result, very little has changed, because my husband and I are the only people who think changes need to be made.

How do we tell our story without coming off as the lunatic grieving parents who want to blame everyone BUT their kid?

So, I'm noisy whenever I think I might be able to effect change in individuals. Thank you for allowing me the opportunity.

I'm so sorry for your loss. You made very good points in your story that I hope make people stop and think. It goes along with one of my earlier posts. When you are in charge of children you must assess the potential risks. It doesn't make you a lunatic, it makes you the person with common sense who is trying to avoid a tragedy. Yes, we want our children to become independent, however, we should allow them to do so in safe environments since they are still kids and don't make the best decisions. Your story is a great example of how the outcome might have been different (and less tragic) had different decisions been made by the adults.

My heart goes out to your family and all the others with losses who have posted. I can't imagine your pain.

[quentina]

Originally Posted by wvjules

What!?!?!? How can any of them continue on with this field trip? That's another week. (Unless the article meant the were returning the day the article was written.)

Such as sad story. DD is going to Dorney Park with her class tomorrow. I'm going to be a mess. Amusement parks and rides make me nervous.

I live 5 minutes away...I can check on her if you want