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Old 07-06-2013, 04:25 PM   #1
PollyannaMom
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Backyard Pool Question

At what age did/do/will you let your kids swim on the buddy system instead of with an adult watching? Does it matter if your pool is above or in-ground? And what about a mixed-age group?
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Old 07-06-2013, 04:30 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by PollyannaMom
At what age did/do/will you let your kids swim on the buddy system instead of with an adult watching? Does it matter if your pool is above or in-ground? And what about a mixed-age group?
Our kids swam in ground pool ages 11 14 and 16 last weekend no adults. All decent swimmers familiar with the pool, etc. Did so last 2 summers iirc. Also depends on the kids.
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Old 07-06-2013, 05:31 PM   #3
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Our sons were never aloud to swim alone until their late teens. However, guests were never aloud to swim without one of us present. Liability was always on our minds plus safety of our sons friends and guest was always a concern.
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Old 07-06-2013, 05:35 PM   #4
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In ground pool. My two boys 16 and 20 swim when they feel like it. I do pull the cameras up and watch while I do chores if someone is swimming alone. Also, I send a dog outside when someone swims alone.
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Old 07-06-2013, 05:43 PM   #5
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Girls are 13, 17 and 19. above ground pool. The 19 and 17 I have to be home...I will be in the house...but have the window open and I listen/look out for them. The 13 year old I am still in the yard when she is in the pool with friends. At this age I will run in to go to the bathroom, but other then that.. I will stay out and do yard work while they are in the pool.
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Old 07-06-2013, 05:49 PM   #6
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above.. below ground makes no difference for us.

An adult always needs to be near, Accidents happen...and kids panic, even adults do
All it takes is a simple fall and a hit head.... can be tragic so quickly...
Or a funny Jump (when no jumping is is allowed etc) Simply Not worth the risk....
So for our house rule was, adult is always present........
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Old 07-06-2013, 06:19 PM   #7
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Drowning is silent. Leaving a window or door open so that you can hear will not help much.

My kids are 15 and 12 and we have an in ground pool. They are not allowed in the pool without me out there. I may step in to grab a towel or something but I am never away for long. I normally work in my flower beds by the pool while they swim, but I'm constantly watching them.

Maybe in another year or so i may feel different, but you just never know what may happen. I could never forgive myself if something happened to them that I could have prevented.

ETA, I am a very good swimmer, and I won't even get in the pool unless someone is out there or at home. I think swimming alone is way to dangerous.
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Old 07-06-2013, 06:28 PM   #8
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ETA, I am a very good swimmer, and I won't even get in the pool unless someone is out there or at home. I think swimming alone is way to dangerous.
I'm with you!

I grew up on and around water, was on swim team, life guarded, etc and I won't swim alone.

I think in the teens and when everyone in pool is a good swimmer I'd be comfortable making dinner or bring somewhere other than pool deck.
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Old 07-06-2013, 06:57 PM   #9
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Thanks, folks - it's reassuring to know I'm not the only strict one! (I won a "Mean Mom Award" today for insisting on no swimming without an adult.)
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Old 07-06-2013, 07:07 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by Disworldluv View Post
Our sons were never aloud to swim alone until their late teens. However, guests were never aloud to swim without one of us present. Liability was always on our minds plus safety of our sons friends and guest was always a concern.
Absolutely!!!

My kids weren't allowed alone until my oldest was 18 ( younger 15) and then NO FRIENDS at all, unless myself or husband were home.

Owning a backyard pool demands a lot of responsibility
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Old 07-06-2013, 07:25 PM   #11
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I volunteer for a trauma intervention program. Police, fire fighters, er nurses call us to be with victims. I've been with a mom who's daughter had to have her stomach pumped, car accidents at the scene, suicide and with an elderly woman alone stood next to her as her husband passed as her family was on their way from San Diego.

My last call I went on was a 7 year old girl drowned in her family pool. They said she could swim. The dad was outside there cleaning the BBQ. The mother was in the kitchen feeding the younger sister, cleaning up. They told her to stay in the shallow end.

I can't explain what it was like to walk into their nightmare. Dishes all over the kitchen, pool lights on. I was called to be with the youngest daughter (5) as they jumped into the ambulance. I played with her (before any family could arrive). Police in the back yard. In the game room "where's my sister?" Then she took me to her bedroom that she shared with her sister. All her brownie stuff, her school stuff, it was like time stood still. Then the sister said "I don't think she's coming home." I was there when they came home and took her upstairs to tell her. The wailing is something I can never forget.

I cried for days. My daughter was 7 at the time. It was too much for me and I stopped.

Drowning is a silent killer.
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Old 07-06-2013, 08:04 PM   #12
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I let my 17 and 16 yr old kids alone in the pool. It's an above ground and they aren't much for jumping in, they would float on the rafts.
My ds 12 is not allowed near the pool without an adult out side.

My neighbor has 2 sons 14 and 10 they aren't allowed in their pool when no one is home so they come down to my house and swim during the day since I am home and in the pool already
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Old 07-06-2013, 08:13 PM   #13
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I really don't remember. It's not like they reached a magic age and it was ok. I can say with certainty, that they were way younger than 18 Probably 10/12
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Old 07-06-2013, 08:18 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by wdwmom0f3 View Post
Drowning is silent. Leaving a window or door open so that you can hear will not help much.
I listen for silence and if I do not hear anything that is a cue to go take a look. As it is.. I am looking out all the time if they have friends over, My older two do not need me to be outside while they are with their friends in the pool....But the rule is I am home and I open the back doors and windows so I can listen.
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Old 07-06-2013, 08:24 PM   #15
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At what age did/do/will you let your kids swim on the buddy system instead of with an adult watching? Does it matter if your pool is above or in-ground? And what about a mixed-age group?
None of my kids are allowed in the pool alone, ever. The oldest is 18. It is an above ground pool.

DH will occasionally swim alone in the evening, and I check on him occasionally.

Buddy system, I allow now that middle son is 15. I would not allow it w/ DD13 and her friends. I sit outside with them.

AND, I don't let them swim at anyone's house IF they do not meet the above criteria.
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